#it’s a good thing we’re not planning on taking testosterone

[sergeanthatredbignaturals]

I made these in like 3 minutes

Multiple trans ones because i couldn’t decide on one flag to use

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA if I uninvited a friend from a trip he helped paid and planned for, for over a year so so I could bring a new friend?

So I and three other friends have been playing to go on a vacation together for about a year now. We’re going in a few months and will be gone for about two weeks. It’s been a really big deal for all of us, because it’s been the first time in a few years we’ve all been able to hang out with each other. We’ve been friends since elementary school, so I’d consider us very close. Everyone has contributed some money to the trip. Friends A, B, and C have contributed the same amount money (around $1,000 each). I have contributed around $1500 of my own money as well. I have control of the finances because I���ll the most responsible. We’ve all shared planning out the vacation.

I recently made another friend, X. I’ve been friends with him for over half a year. We connected through B, and him and B have been good friends for awhile. X and A don’t know each other as well but get along from what I can tell. He had never met C but I figured they would get along well because they have a similar sense of humor and like similar things. B asked me if I would be okay with X coming along since I controlled the finances, and I said sure as long as he paid his share. B then asked A and C if they would be okay with X coming along.

So, something about X is that he’s trans. He only started taking testosterone a month or two ago, and he hasn’t had any surgeries. A said he was okay with it. C said he didn’t feel comfortable with X coming. When asked why he said it was because this was supposed to be an all guys trip and it’s hard for him to see X as a guy when he still looked female (his exact words). B pointed out that X is a guy, and that him not looking masculine enough for C doesn’t make him not a guy, which made C get defensive and they got into an argument.

Afterwards, B asked me if that if X was coming if C could be uninvited, and that B was uncomfortable being around C now knowing what C thinks about his friend. C said he isn’t that good with trans stuff, and that X should be uninvited because we had been planning this for over a year. C also said it wasn’t fair to suddenly uninvite him only a few months out for a new friend. I am not very good with trans stuff either, but I sided with B. I feel really uncomfortable with the way he’s been talking about X in general. Him calling X female or saying he looked like a girl multiple times during that conversation sealed it for me.

I ultimately decided to uninvite C. I want X to come with us and I don’t want C to make him uncomfortable. I tried to give him his money back that he contributed, but he hasn’t talked to me since that argument. I don’t have any way to give him the money, as he’s been giving it to me in cash for the past year. C has been lashing out at B and A too, complaining about how we’ve all abandoned him and that we were his only friends. My family has said I should uninvite X and reinvite C.

I feel like I may be TA because I uninvited him from a trip he’s also been looking forward to for a year, and effectively cut him off from a 10+ year friendship for someone I’ve only been friends with for a little while.

What are these acronyms?

[nolita-fairytale]

call sign: tennessee whiskey | rooster x fem!reader & hangman x phoenix | chapter two

summary: you and phoenix make plans to dinner on saturday, instead of going to the hard deck. (rooster x reader-heavy chapter)

warnings: enemies to lovers, slow burn, eventual smut, swearing, mentions of death, strong possibility of military inaccuracies, second person pov, no use of y/n,

wc: 5.2k

listen to: you're all i need - marvin gaye & tammi terrell | the playlist

chapter one | masterlist | chapter three

“Will you slow down, Whiskey? Run’s over,” Phoenix says, trying to catch her breath as the two of you walk back up the beach. 

“Just trying to keep up with you,” you shoot back, slowing down your power-walk pace as you make your way up the beach. “So damn competitive.”

Nat had in fact set a blistering pace for your morning run, and now, you were on a roll, using every muscle fiber in your body to propel you uphill to your first cup of coffee. You can already tell that you’re going to be sore tomorrow. Why did you think it was a good idea to go on a beach run this morning? It was practically a hike just to get back and the two of you had your first meeting back on base at 0800 sharp. 

“And you’re not?” she quips, causing you to laugh. 

“No, you’re right,” you concede to her, making your way up the steps that lead off of the beach. 

There’s a coffee place across the beach entrance and it’s the first place you intend to go before heading back to the barracks to get changed. 

You and Nat order your coffees, taking them to go as you cooldown on your walk back to the barracks. The sun has just risen and it’s nice to have a moment to yourself before things get serious again. It became apparent on day one how high stakes this special mission is and you can tell that it’s already beginning to affect everyone. It’s only been a few days of grueling training and everyone’s already looking forward to having the weekend off. 

“So… I saw you and Rooster talking the other night at the Hard Deck,” Phoenix prods, changing the subject. 

“Not this again,” you groan, taking a sip of your latte in an attempt to breathe life back into your body. “You have anything to do with that?”

“You can’t blame me for being excited! I have been trying to get the two of you in the same room since we met in Bosnia,” she defends herself before continuing her explanation. 

“And somehow every time I do, you’re deployed, or he’s deployed, or you have a trip planned, and the only time he can come visit me is when you’re visiting your dad or blah blah blah. I mean, this is a freakin’ miracle!”

“What’s up, Phoenix? Why are you so intent on setting me up with this guy anyways?” you ask, stealing a glance in Nat’s direction. 

“Because!” she exclaims with an exasperated sigh. “You both are the best people I know and I think you have a lot in common. More than you know.” She chuckles to herself before continuing with:

“Plus I think in all the time I’ve known him, he’s had maybe one or two serious relationships? You know how this job is. I just-, I think he’s really ready to settle down and… I think you’d be good for him.”

Her response makes you chuckle, but you still feel hesitant.

“I don’t know, Nat,” you drag out. “It’s not like we’re here to date, though, perhaps the Navy should’ve thought twice before putting their best and brightest all in the same room together.” 

She laughs because some days it’s like the fuckin’ Olympics when most of these people are in tip top shape, tension and testosterone ramped up to 100, and single. How could it not be like the fuckin’ horny Olympics?

“This mission is… somethin’ else,” you continue. “I mean. No one on active duty’s pulled something off like this – not even Maverick. I’m not sure any of us can afford to get… distracted… right now. If we get selected for this mission-.”

“When we get selected for this mission,” she interjects, quick to correct you. 

“… I don’t know I can do my job if I’m up there just… thinking about him… and his porn ‘stache,” you giggle, completing your sentence. 

“Oh, so you’ve been thinking about it?” she’s quick to quip. 

“I never said that,” you defend yourself playfully. 

“Well, he’s been thinking about you,” she says in a sing-song voice, earning a funny look from you. 

She shrugs, waiting for you to take the bait, as you open your mouth to ask:

“Wh-, what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothin’,” she shrugs again, coyly. She’s satisfied with herself, because whether you want to or not, Bradley Bradshaw’s already distracted you. “He just made it a point to ask me if you were single yesterday, is all.”

“Huh,” you hum in response. 

You know she means well and you can’t fault her for her persistence. Over the last few days you’ve been around each other, you can see why she wants to set the two of you up. Rooster’s good looking, he seems kind, and he’s a phenomenal pilot – something that makes him even more attractive to you. In any other circumstance, you’d be all for it, but the parameters of the mission have had you on edge all week. 

“What?” Natasha presses you. 

“Nothing. It’s just funny because that first night at the Hard Deck-, he asked if me and Jake were a thing,” you admit, as the two of you get closer to the barracks. 

She lets out a dry laugh. 

“I don’t blame him!” she exclaims. “Who’d meet you… and then Hangman… and ever think you’d have enough in common to be friends! Not to mention the two of you are weirdly very affectionate – and I’d like to add – publicly.”

She follows it up with another fake vomit, earning a laugh from you. 

“Jake is family. It’s the Texan in us,” you shrug, defending you and Jake’s relationship lightly. 

“So…?” she asks, waiting to hear the end of this story. 

“What?” you ask back, as the two of you approach the barracks. 

“So did you tell him that or not!?” she pries, the curiosity killing her. 

“Yeah of course!” you exclaim with a laugh, before deciding to turn the tables on her. “Don’t worry, Phoenix. I told him Jake’s more your speed anyways.”

“You did what?!” she practically screeches, using her free hand to grab your forearm. Phoenix pulls you to a sudden halt, practically glaring you down in response to what you’ve just said. 

“I’m just kidding, jeez. Relax!” you cry out, holding your hand out. “But don’t think I don't notice the way he looks at you.”

She scoffs, “Bagman looks at anything that moves like that.”

“So you’ve noticed?” you shoot back. 

This is so payback. 

She groans, shoving you playfully. 

Was it that obvious?

Phoenix likes to think she’s quite good at squashing any kind of affectionate feeling she’s ever had for Hangman behind sarcasm and snarky jabs at the arrogant aviator. It never occurred to her that – suddenly feeling very self-conscious about it – that you may have noticed what’s been lying beneath it this whole time. 

Then again, you’ve known him the longest. 

And you know her so well. 

But she’d rather not talk about her and Jake right now, reminding herself that there is no her and Jake. 

Nat shifts her focus back to you. 

She’s not ready to give up just yet because there could be a you and Rooster and she spent most of last night before bed cooking up a plan. 

“Why don’t we go out this weekend? Maybe we skip the Hard Deck on Saturday… go to a nice place for dinner and get dressed up. Blow off some steam?” Phoenix suggests as she smoothly changes the subject. 

“Yeah, that sounds great, actually,” you agree, because it does sound great. “Should we make it a girls’ thing? I can invite Halo.”

“No!” Nat protests, immediately pulling back on the intensity so that you don’t catch on. “Nothing against Halo. But we haven’t really gotten to catch up much, one on one. Next time.”

You shoot her a funny look, mostly because she’s acting really strange right now. 

“Okay, you fuckin’ weirdo,” you tease, agreeing to her weekend plan. 

“Great! I’ll look up a cool spot and send you the details,” she squeals excitedly. 

What you don’t know is that Natasha Trace has no intention of showing up. 

*

You spend most of your Saturday resting. You grab breakfast with Halo, your WSO, before taking a solo walk along the beach. Everyone’s gotten a single for this three week stint at TOPGUN (a courtesy, you suspect) but living in a glorified college dorm room feels surreal.

It’s nice to get some recharge time, especially after such a long week. To say it’s been brutal would be an understatement: there’s the never-ending sets of 200 pushups, the fact that this uranium enrichment assignment seems to be a near-suicide mission, and the tense relationship Rooster seems to have with Maverick that’s impossible to ignore. 

Your phone buzzes as you walk back up the beach, heading back to your bunk for a quick nap. It’s a text from Phoenix – a link to a cute little Italian restaurant along the San Diego Bay. 

You’re quick to reply with a little humor. 

You: How romantic. 

Phoenix: Date night!! Lol. 

Phoenix: Rooster let me borrow the Bronco to run some errands so I’ll meet you there. Wanna take Uber there and I’ll drive us both home?

You: So I can drink more wine than you? Absolutely. 

Phoenix: Not everything is a competition, Whiskey. 

You: LOL. I didn’t mean it like that, but deal. 

Phoenix: 7 pm. Don’t be late 😘

Phoenix: And wear something cute. 

You laugh, because you know she hates it when you’re late. And you’re almost always running a little bit behind. 

You: Can’t wait to spend a night out of uniform.

You: And I’ll try my best. 

Phoenix: Think of it as a ‘who can get there earliest’ competition. 

You: ☠️

You spend the afternoon doing absolutely nothing before getting ready for dinner with Phoenix. You appreciate that she volunteered to drive because you’re ready to blow off some steam. You put on one of your favorite sundresses, something you brought along with you for after the mission. Your plan is to stay in Southern California for a week or so longer before you return to Lemoore. It helps to have a fancy friend with an investment banker husband and an extravagant summer home in Encinitas.

You can’t remember where they’re summering this season instead. A chateau in Provence? The Amalfi coast? Or was it Mallorca she’d mentioned over the phone a few weeks ago when you’d made this arrangement? Regardless, you’re just glad they let you use the place when they’re not there. 

And it seems as if Phoenix’s earlier challenge is working, as your Uber pulls up to the waterside Italian restaurant at exactly 7 pm. 

There’s a first time for everything, you think to yourself, knowing that Nat will be more-than-pleased that maybe your punctuality – often only reserved for work – is beginning to trickle over into your personal life. 

“Reservation for Trace,” you say to the host. 

“Right this way,” the host replies warmly. You follow the young man outside to a waterside table set for two. There’s a small tea candle lit in the middle of the table with a soundtrack to match the soft, beach vibes. 

You’re surprised to find that Nat hasn’t gotten here yet, especially since she made such a big deal about being on time. Your phone buzzes, and you have a text from Nat that reads:

Got caught up in errands. Running a few minutes late but be there soon!! 

You type back a quick:

All good. See you soon! 

You chuckle, shaking your head, because of course, the one time you’re on time she’s running late. Leaving your phone on the table for now, you look over the menu, picking out a bottle of wine for the two of you when the waitress comes by. 

Sure, it’s summertime, but you know Nat can’t stand white wine, so you settle on a bottle of chilled red that seems refreshing enough for a Southern California summer night. 

After the bottle of wine comes to the table, you glance down for the time, and when a few minutes turn into fifteen, you start to worry. 

Where the hell is she?

You grab your phone off the table this time with the intent to call Natasha. It’s then that the host reappears, ushering a tall, brunette man in your direction. You’d recognize him anywhere with his Hawaiian shirt open, layered over a white tee. That combined with his signature mustache and the aviators are practically his own version of a civilian uniform. 

What the hell was Bradley Bradshaw doing here?

He spots you, and you watch as he exchanges a few words of gratitude with the host, before making his way to your table. You stand up out of your chair, really fucking confused as he approaches. 

“Hey,” he says as he approaches, removing his aviators and tucking them into the neckline of his t-shirt. He shoots you a friendly smile, but you can tell that he’s just as confused as you are. 

“Hi,” you greet him. “What’re you doing here?”

“I’m supposed to be meeting Phoenix here for dinner. What’re you doing here?” he asks back, causing your jaw to drop. 

“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me,” you scoff, with a shake of your head. 

That conniving, scheming, little firebird 

“What?” you hear Bradley ask. 

“I-,” you start, letting out another amused laugh before taking a breath. “I was also supposed to meet Nat here for dinner, and it’s just now occurring to me that… she… never planned on showing up in the first place.”

“What do you-?” Bradley begins to ask, before realizing what you mean. “Oh shit.” He laughs too. “She parent trapped us.”

“I think so, yeah,” you nod in agreement, a half-apologetic smile on your face as you look at him. 

You both turn your attention to your phones as both of them go off, signaling a notification. 

It’s Phoenix. 

I love you both, but you’re so damn stubborn. Don’t hate me for what I had to do. 

You and Rooster share a look, exchanging a laugh between the two of you. 

“Wow. I can’t believe-, well, I can. But I can’t believe her!” you remark, still in disbelief that she managed to pull this one over on you. 

“Yeah this is… only a little embarrassing. She’s…” he sighs, looking out across the bay for a moment. 

“Something,” you complete his sentence. “So what do you want to do?”

Bradley focuses his attention back on you as he says, “Looks like you’ve already ordered a bottle of wine.” He pauses briefly to take the sight of you in. “And it’d be a shame to waste such a pretty dress, don’t you think?”

He’s not hiding the fact that he’s very obviously checking you out, and you can’t say that you don’t like it. 

“I was also really looking forward to having pasta tonight,” you add to the ‘reasons why we should stay and have this date’ list. 

“What do you say?” Rooster asks, gesturing towards the table with a hopeful look in his eyes.  

You pause for a moment, just to appreciate how handsome he is before saying: “Why the hell not?”

As you move to sit down, Rooster’s right by your side, pulling your chair out for you like the gentlemen his mother raised him to be. 

“Thank you,” you smile, feeling your heart skip a beat.

You put your phone back into your bag as Rooster returns to his side of the table, sitting down across from you. 

Okay. So this was happening. 

Damn, you think to yourself. 

Nat always finds a way to get what she wants. 

And you’re not sure whether you want to thank her or kill her later. 

But you push your thoughts about Nat’s little scheme away to focus on getting to know Bradley. You’re here now, so why not see if Nat’s been right this whole time about the two of you. 

You strategize with Rooster, choosing a few things that you can share together in order to try as many things that seem appealing to the two of you. You tell him about how you fell in love with Italian cooking when you were stationed for a year in Naples and he confesses that he doesn’t know all that much about wine even though he thinks he should. You tell him that Halo’s a sommelier and that you’ve learned a lot from her about it. He thinks you should all go on a wine tour sometime and you like that he wants to make future plans with you.

“So you’re at Lemoore, right?” he asks, in reference to which Naval Base you’re stationed at. 

“Yeah, and you?” you ask back 

“Oceana. Virginia Beach,” he replies. “But I just got back from a deployment overseas.”

While he tells you as much as he can about his last deployment (and he can’t tell you much) you can’t help noticing the song that plays in the background. You smile to yourself, hearing the comforting and familiar notes followed by:

“You’re all I need to get by…” 

“Oh, I love this song,” you groan in response to the Marvin Gaye duet. 

“Really?” Rooster asks, surprised by your reaction to one of his favorite motown hits. 

“Oh yeah,” you emphasize, your eyes lighting up as the song continues. 

Nat had always said that the two of you had a lot in common and Bradley begins to understand why. 

“I’m surprised you know this song,” he blurts out, immediately regretting the words that have flown out of his mouth. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you tease him flirtatiously. 

But it doesn’t throw him. He’s smooth as he plays it off, shrugging with a:

“I thought I was the only one left these days who listened to the classics.”

“Well, you’re not so!” you exclaim with a giggle. Now you’re intrigued. “I’m surprised you know this song.”

Then again, this is the man who had managed to rope an entire bar into singing “Great Balls of Fire” with him the other night. Maybe you shouldn’t be so surprised. 

“What can I say? I’ve got good taste,” he flirts back, eyeing you. 

Shit, Bradley thinks to himself. 

You’ve got great taste in music. 

You’re fucking gorgeous. 

And the silky slip dress you’re wearing has his imagination running wild. He can’t stop thinking about how flimsy the straps of the dress are, and how one of them somehow keeps managing to slip off your shoulder. His eyes follow your hand each time you reach up to pull the strap of your dress back over your shoulder, your fingertips gliding across your bare skin. It’s got him thinking about all kinds of things…

Bradley looks at you like he wants to devour you, and you’re trying your best not to let him do it, right at the table. 

You clear your throat, trying your best to focus on the fact that you were just talking about your favorite motown classics a second ago. 

“I don’t know where you got your great taste in music… but my dad owned a record store when I was growing up – well, he owns a record store now, but it’s a different one. He’s a musician too and he’s always felt really passionate about supporting Texas musicians on the up and up,” you share with him, explaining some of your most personal connections to music. 

“Actually, fun fact: he had both Gary Clark Jr. and Leon Bridges play at the store he had in Houston.”

“Yeah?” Bradley asks, encouraging you to share more. 

He could listen to you talk all day, especially about music. There’s something in the way your eyes light up that makes his heart flutter as he hangs on every single word. 

“Yeah. After my mom died he remarried and he and my step mom opened up a little record store / cafe in Austin after I left for the naval academy,” you continue. 

“I think that was the last thing he ever expected – me joining the military. I don’t think he and my step mom really got it at first, them both being artists and whatnot. I mean, Dad was like… a total hippie in his day. Protested the Vietnam War and everything. But it paid for college and they’ve come around.”

“Wow,” is all he says, marveling at you. “You are so much cooler than Hangman.”

You let out a loud, unexpected laugh in response to what he’s just said.

“What makes you say that?” you ask, in regards to the somewhat random connection.

“I just-, I didn’t know Texans could be cool,” he stammers out, earning another laugh from you. 

“Well. We are. Jake and I are also from very different parts of Texas. He’s a good ol’ Dallas boy,” you shrug. “Which is probably why he’s such a dick.”

Rooster chuckles, gazing out over the bay, before bringing his attention back to you. 

“You two have quite the rivalry,” you bring up, curiously. 

Rooster shrugs, “I guess.”

But he doesn’t want to talk about Hangman right now, and neither do you. 

“I uh, I’m sorry to hear though… about your mom,” he says quietly, catching you off guard. He knows exactly why he wants to hear you talk about that, but he’s not sure if he’s ready to share why yet. 

“Oh!” you gasp, a little caught off guard by his redirection. “That’s-, thanks. We lost her when I was really young. Car accident.”

He nods slowly, in understanding.

“I lost my dad when I was really young too,” he shares, empathetically. “Training exercise gone wrong.”

“He was also a pilot?” you ask, your voice soft. 

“Yeah, aviator in the Navy. It’s actually why I learned to play piano,” he continues. It’s also why he joined the navy too – despite what Maverick had done – but he’s not sure he’s ready to share that part yet. “Used to play all the time with my mom when I was a kid. Some of my earliest memories with him.”

“Oh I’m so sorry, Bradley,” you say, using his proper name. Using his call sign just doesn’t feel right for the intimacy of the moment. 

“Thank you,” he replies, his voice still quiet. 

Rooster thinks it may be too much: telling you about his dad and his mom in the same night. Besides, wasn’t this supposed to be a date?

He clears his throat, ready to change the subject as he dryly says, “Wow this is uh-, great first date conversation.”

“No I-,” you begin, reaching across the table to place the gentlest hand on his forearm. “I know it’s not the cheeriest topic but… I’m glad you told me.”

You wait a beat. 

“I-... I’m glad that I know that about you. And thanks. For listening to me.”

You share a smile with him as the two of you stare across the table at each other. You don’t move your hand just yet, because the warmth of his forearm underneath the palm of your hand feels too good. There’s an intimacy here that wasn’t there when the night started and you decide that you like it. 

“So your dad’s a musician. What about you?” he asks, changing the subject. 

“I dabbled a little with a whole lot: piano, guitar, and briefly explored playing the clarinet for about six months in high school. I’m good enough to get by, I guess? But… nothin’ like my old man. He still plays gigs in the little performance space at the record store,” you answer, happily. 

“If I recall correctly, you’re quite the piano player yourself,” you say, offering up another chance for him to share something with you. 

“Gives me something to do in the barracks if there’s one on base,” he replies, casually, as if the other night hadn’t been some of the best piano playing you’d heard in a long time. 

“And if there’s not?” you inquire, raising an eyebrow.

“I bring my own!” he declares, unapologetically. 

You laugh. 

You can picture it now: while the rest of his squadron is trying to sleep, he’s three floors below playing Jerry Lee Lewis at two in the morning on his BYO-electric keyboard. 

“Oh wow, your squadron must hate you,” you joke with him.

He chuckles at your sassy remark, “Tell me about it.”

You’ve got a fire inside of you that he really fucking likes. 

By the time your food comes, you’ve talked about everything: from your time at the naval academy and his at UVA, whatever the hell carbonic maceration means about the bottle of wine you ordered and how wine can be so pretentious, best to worst pizza toppings, ranked. You think you could sit here and talk to Rooster for hours. He’s charming – not in the way that Jake or any of the other suave southern playboys you grew up around are – but he’s sweet, genuine, and you really can’t get over the fact that you actually like the mustache on him. 

“Hi guys. No rush, but I just wanted to bring by your check,” the waitress says politely, as she comes by the table. 

The sun has completely set, the evening lit only by the lights from inside, the tiny tea candles on each table, and the gas lamps that line the patio. You really weren’t kidding when you called this place romantic. 

“Do you wanna split-,” you offer. 

“I got this,” Rooster insists, firmly. You watch as he takes care of the bill, handing his card back to the waiter. 

You watch the interaction carefully, looking from him to the waiter inquisitively. He seems more than eager to pick up the bill, so you let him. Maybe it’s the wine, or the fact that you’re really enjoying this night, that emboldens you to ask:

“So this was a date?”

Bradley smiles, a flush of pink running across his tanned cheekbones. 

“I think Phoenix made that clear,” he says. “And you know she’d kick my ass if I let you go dutch with me.”

You giggle, nodding in agreement, before shooting him a suspicious look. 

“Were you… in on this?” you drag out. 

“Would it matter if I was?” he asks back, something soft in his chocolate brown eyes. 

“No,” you shake your head, quick to reassure him. “This… is the best date I’ve been on in a long time.”

“For the record,” Rooster starts, leaning in towards you. “I wasn’t. This… was all Phoenix.”

He waits a beat before adding:

“But I kinda wish I had been.”

“Yeah?”

He smiles before admitting, “This is the best date I’ve been on in a while too.” 

You both decide to head back to the barracks, realizing that Phoenix had thought out every single piece of this. Now it made sense – why she asked you to Uber here when you had a perfectly good car. She really made sure neither of you could deny that this was a date. 

A really good date. 

You watch as Rooster leads you to his car, following you to the passenger side so that he can open the door for you. 

A true gentleman. 

Damn, he was already making this really fucking hard. All you want to do is let him peel off your slip dress and forget all about this special op. 

“Rooster, wait,” you say, turning so that your back is pressed up against the passenger door. 

“What’s up?” he asks, a hint of concern in his voice as he towers over you. 

He’s so close to you right now, and you can smell the remnants of the cologne he was wearing earlier. It wouldn’t be so bad if you just-. 

“I want to be honest with you,” you begin, so that you don’t do the thing that you really want to do. “This mission scares the shit out of me. And it thrills me. And… I really want to go.”

“Okay…” he trails off, only smiling a little because he finds you so damn cute when you get passionate.

“It’s just, normally, after a date like this, I’d definitely kiss you,” you continue boldly, earning a smile from him. “Amongst… other things. And I’d want to keep kissing you and I wouldn’t think twice about getting all kinds of wrapped up in whatever this is.” 

You pause, fighting all of your better instincts to just do it. 

“I just don’t know if-, if I can start something right now… and not get distracted and… I don’t know if either of us can afford to get distracted, especially in the face of something like this mission.”

You’re beginning to over explain yourself but it’s like you can’t help it as the words tumble out of your mouth. 

“I mean, it’s not like this is some regular deployment. Usually we’d have more than three weeks to pull off something this complex and this is something that no one has managed to do before and every day the hard deck drops and some does the time limit-. It’s not like I’m expecting you to wait around for me or anything but-.”

“Whiskey,” he cuts you off, the dumbest grin on his face as he does. 

“I understand,” Bradley says, taking a step towards you. 

“You do?” you ask, sounding much more surprised than you intended to. 

“Yes,” he smiles back at you, reaching up to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear. Your heart flutters and you’re suddenly questioning why you can’t just kiss him now. 

“You’re right,” he agrees, his voice soft and sweet as he reassures you. “We can’t afford to get distracted. So we’ll wait. Till after the mission.”

“Really?” you ask. 

“Like I said before. This is the best date I’ve been on in a long time too,” he admits, earning another smile from you. 

“Maybe… we can get to know each other as friends over the next two weeks?” you suggest, hopefully. “Explore what else this could be after the mission.”

“I think that’s something I can agree to…” Bradley trails off, pausing before he adds, “... under two conditions.”

“Okay. Let’s hear ‘em,” you encourage with a giggle. 

“When this is all over… I’m taking you out on a second date,” he says, laying his first condition out on the table. 

“And the other one?” you ask curiously, tempted to just wrap your arms around him. 

“And the other one…. While I’d love to get to know you…” he leans in, dangerously close to you now before continuing with his second condition. 

“…Don’t think for a moment, sweetheart, that we’re just friends.”

The way he whispers the last part in your ear sends chills down your spine, and you have to bite back a moan as you feel his body press up against yours. 

You’re not sure how you’re still breathing as you whisper, “I think that’s something I can agree to.”

“Good,” he rasps, his lips ghosting over the shell of your ear. “Let’s get you home.” 

He pulls away from you, allowing you to step aside, so that he can open the passenger door for you. You climb into his Bronco, your heart racing from your conversation with Rooster. And in the spirit of condition number two, a few minutes into the drive, you tangle your fingers with his, and you hold his hand for the rest of the way home. 

Just so he knows that your intentions are anything but friendly too. 

The next two weeks can’t go by fast enough.

*

a/n: i swear i gave myself heart palpitations while writing this. *hyperventilates bc they're so damn cute wtf*

read: chapter three

[carmenized-onions]

Rightyho

I know others have sent you paragraphs of their thoughts and shit so I thought I'd join, I write down thoughts on pen and paper for shows, movies fics, you're on a piece of paper in my hands btw, labeled

"Shit to send Salt"

So, I started writing this when the shit exec came to the bear, and I noticed you kept calling him THE MAN and that took me back to reading Cujo and the stand by Stephen king, both dogs thought of their owners as THE MAN and so that Got Me.

I've read through your story like 7 times bc my memory is dogshit and each time is like getting a slapp with a dead fish on one side of my face and a kiss on the other.

You got a rosemary water recipe? I'm suffering from old man balding disease at 26 (thank uou testosterone 🫠)

ALSO TONY CONFRONTING LEE AT THE WEDDING!!!???! I WANNA SEE A GD BRAWL

"Mikey's made the cycle break in a way that doesn't hurt"

Bitch that hurt ME

I wanna bare knuckle brawl the exec chef, I'd fight dirty bur I'd still pull fucking rank.

"You're not nothing Mikey"

Fucking Carm, how DARE he say the same fucking thing to Richie

"Six hours, same team" motherfucker I'm in tears.

Eva, tony/terry/Tommy with mikey and richie? I'm in love

Richie: "I don't wanna plan your funeral" AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH

Fuckin' "I'm just out gor a walk sweetheart" I knew Chip asked carm to turn on his location for a fuckin reason, and as someone who's been 'out for a walk' when actively sui, fucking hurts and put it into perspective of the people I'd leave behind, so thank you for stompin all over my insides with the whiplash you give me each chapter!

Also

"Michael fucking saw you"

OOOOOFFFFF

Punch me right in the throat will ya?

But seriously honestly chicagos kindest is one of the best fics I've ever read in my life, I have a rotation of focus I keep coming back to and atm you're at the top of the fucking list!

Be proud of the space you've made with your writing!!!

FIRST OF ALL— I got your submission of that comic too!! But since it was screenshots it did seem like there was some private info in there— So i DELETED IT (I also feel bad basically freebooting a comic)— But I found it funny, so. There is that. Thank you!

I’m on a piece of paper!! Biggest honour!! And we’re even trying to make Salt happen. That’s so sweet of you. I don’t think we’re gonna pull it off man I’ll be honest but we can try.

YES YES YES YES— Very much so was going for ominous all powerful God man— Was that just cause we weren’t given a name yet and I didn’t want to make one up and be wrong? Yeah. But then we got David just in time, so I didn’t have to keep calling him The Man!! Wonderful. 

I’ve a decent memory I think, but even I have to re-read my shit all the time to make sure I didn’t miss shit— And I know how long this shit takes to re-read so that really means the world to me love, thank you!

FUCK testosterone (thank you testosterone), baby 1 sprig of rosemary to 1 cup of water, cut up a chunk of ginger, add like 10 cloves or so, whatever. Bring that shit to a boil then lower it to a simmer for 20 minutes, then let it rest until cool. THEN strain!! Usually I just leave the pot for like a couple hours and forget it was there, gets nice and red that way!! Stays good for like a week, so don’t make a lot at once. Also use daily. Also for best efficacy keep in the fridge. Also i love you. We’re bald together. 

I want to write a scene of him being full taken to the floor so bad. I — every time I think about it I want to make his head explode with my mind. And HOW DARE Carmen say the same shit to Rich!! Mr Electric kill him!!

Mikey Cycle Breaker for Everyone But Himself Berzatto— I need to lay down jesus christ just hurt my own feelings. 

I’ve been on both sides of that call!! And it hurts SO much on both ends on being out for a walk, and I’m glad for a handful of people that’ve been on one side of that call got to see what the other side looks like— Sucks for both parties, yknow why? Cause we’re on the same team you FUCK ! NEVER FORGET THAT!! STAY ALIVE !!!!!!!

I am so honoured to be someone’s hyperfixation, kisses u kisses u kisses u THANK you my love. Thank you for your thoughts and thank you for being a part of the space!!

[nabibeans]

Unexpected: Before Ateez.

Part 2.

TW//: vulgar language, mentions of abuse, teen pregnancy, transphobic language.

•

•

•

The members had decided to go to the KQ building together to speak to the CEO; Hongjoong had wanted to stay home but they needed proof of the slap, a red hand print still prominent on the small boys face. The vehicle remained silent the whole time Yunho drove; no one knew what to say, no one knew what to do, all they knew was that their leader needed them now more than ever.

“You know..we don’t debut for 10 months. That’s plenty of time to have your baby and sort things out.” It was Jongho that surprisingly broke the silence. Seonghwa smiled warmly, his arm around his boyfriend who’d dozed off. “We know, I just…I feel bad because it’s my fault he’s pregnant. I shouldn’t have listened to him when he insisted that the testosterone would make it hard for him to get pregnant. We knew the chance was there.” , “that’s not either of your faults. Hongjoong just happened to fall in that percentage of trans men that can get pregnant.” San placed a hand on his Hyung’s shoulder to offer comfort. “He’s right, you two are going to be parents, and if the company doesn’t like that and kicks you both out then we’re leaving too.” Wooyoung sounded confident, it made everyone feel more at ease as they agreed.

“Thanks guys, let’s wait to see what the ceo says first. He was very supportive of Hongjoong’s transition. But this is a human life we’re talking about.” The members nodded in agreement, staying silent the rest of the way. Arriving at the building it seemed their manager had beat them to it; the ceo standing in front of the building listening to whatever the man was yelling about, rolling down the window Yunho listened carefully.

“If you wouldn’t have let that fucking tranny join the team you wouldn’t be dealing with a pregnant idol under your belt!” The man spat, the CEO shook his head in disgust. “Hongjoong’s a good kid, and there’s nothing wrong with him being transgender. As for the pregnancy, that’s up to him if he wants to terminate or carry to term. It’s his body, and Seonghwa has just as much of a say in the matter. I’m assuming he’s the father, and I’d rather speak to the group themselves about this.” The members watched closely, not noticing their leader had woken up with a start. “Does anyone have a bag? I’m gonna puke.” His hand clamped over his mouth. “No, we-“ Hongjoong didn’t care to hear the rest, throwing the door open to get out and run over to a public dumpster. Seonghwa getting out behind him and rushing over.

“Let’s go, before someone sees him.” The rest of the members got out of the car, all huddling around the sick boy to hide him from anyone that might be lurking around. Seonghwa gently rubbed his boyfriend’s back as he finished up, the smaller male standing up properly to wipe his mouth. “Thanks guys. I appreciate it.” The sound of footsteps caught their attention; quickly turning around they came face to face with their CEO, “hello boys. I was just wanting to see you. Hongjoong and Seonghwa especially.” The young couple swallowed, hand in hand now. “Look we’re sorry…we know we shouldn’t have fooled around without protection and-“ , “I’m not upset. In fact I’m willing to pay for all of the prenatal care your baby needs. That is if you are planning on having your baby Hongjoong.”

Wooyoung moved to speak; but Hongjoong beat him to it, “I may be eighteen but I know for sure I want to have my baby.” Seonghwa nodded in agreement. “We know teen pregnancy isn’t ideal, and we know as idols that our baby will need proper care. But we’re willing to do whatever it takes.” The other members nodded in agreement. “You’re right about all of that, Hongjoong. Seonghwa. May I suggest once the pregnancy hits seven months you both go on an extended break until after the baby is born. Then come back before debut?” Hongjoong wouldn’t be healed by then. There was no way they could debut in September so…”let’s push our debut back to October!” Wooyoung blurted out, “he won’t be ready by then! October he’ll be more healed and ready.” Hongjoong’s eyes were wide, Wooyoung had more of a brain than he did in that moment.

The CEO hummed then nodded, “October 24th. I can’t push your debut back any later. What do you say you two?” The couple nodded in agreement. “Okay, we can do that.” So it was settled; they’d have their baby, then they’d debut. Hongjoong couldn’t believe it was real, having a baby with his boyfriend, becoming an idol? He’d need to tell his parents; and seonghwa’s parents, and his brother. There was so much that needed done before a baby could be brought into the world.

“You boys have a good day off, in fact. Take an extra day off alright? Don’t worry about anything we’re in this together.” The boys all nodded in agreement, they were a team and anything that happened they’d face together. “Let’s head home, I’m sure Hongjoongie is tired.” Mingi had noticed their captain swaying a bit. “Yeah, let’s get you back in bed captain.” San helped Seonghwa lead the small male back to the car, settling him between them both.

•

The members arrived back at the dorm in a better mood than they’d left; Seonghwa was carrying Hongjoong on his back since the younger had fallen asleep, he was thankful their boss had given them an extra day off. He and Hongjoong both had a lot of phone calls to make regarding the unplanned pregnancy; more than he wanted to make, prenatal appointments, parents, siblings…but nonetheless he was happy. Having a baby with his boyfriend, debuting just two months later. It was a dream come true.

“I’m gonna make lunch, I’ll bring yours and Hongjoong’s to you hyung.” Wooyoung smiled as his two eldest hyungs headed to their room. “Thank you young-ah, I appreciate it.” Seonghwa carried Hongjoong into their bedroom, laying the small boy down on the bottom bunk and tucking him in. Maybe he should ask if they could have a different bed? One they could share to fit a crib in the room. Pulling out his phone the first number he dialed was his mother’s; she’d be far more understanding than his father, after a few rings the call connected.

“Seonghwa! What do I owe the pleasure!?”

His mother sounded happy, he sighed softly before speaking. “Hey mom, so..you remember Hongjoong right?” His mother made an excited sound, “oh your boyfriend! Yes! How is he doing? I haven’t seen him since his eighteenth birthday party.” Seonghwa took a deep breath. “He’s well, but there’s something I need to tell you.” , “you didn’t break up did you!?” Seonghwa stammered, “no we didn’t! I’m just…well…we’re having a baby mom. Hongjoong is pregnant.” His mother went silent, then she began to speak. “A baby? Seonghwa you both debut soon. Are you sure you can handle a baby?” , “honestly, I don’t know. But we both agreed we want to keep our baby and we’ll do whatever it takes to keep our baby healthy and safe.” His mother hummed softly. “I see. Are you two free? I want to treat you both to dinner. I was a teen myself when I had you so I’d like to give Hongjoong some advice regarding his pregnancy. I’ll pay for any parenting classes you guys might need as well.” Seonghwa sighed in relief, his mother was supportive. “Yeah we’re free this evening. I’ll let him know when he wakes up.” His mother hummed happily. “Alright! I’ll pick you both up! I’ll see you later my star.”, “okay mom! Love you!” After the call ended Seonghwa looked to Hongjoong who had woken up and was smiling softly towards him.

“Was that eomma? You didn’t wake me up?” Seonghwa smiled, leaning forward to kiss his lips. “Yeah, she wants to treat us to dinner.” Hongjoong smiled, wrapping his arms around his lover. “That sounds great, I’ll dress up a bit.” He curled up into Seonghwa’s side. “Was she happy? That we are having a baby?” Seonghwa nodded. “She’s supportive, she’ll pay for parenting classes.” Hongjoong nodded, sitting up a bit. “I should call my mom, let’s do it together?”

“Yeah, of course baby.” Hongjoong took a deep breath as he grabbed his phone; dialing his mother’s number she answered immediately, “Hongjoong-ah! My son! How are you?” , “hey mom, Seonghwa’s here too. You remember Seonghwa, my boyfriend.” His mother hummed, “yes I do, wonderful Seonghwa! What’s going on?” Seonghwa held his hand tightly, giving his boyfriend silent support. “Eomma, I’m…I’m having a baby.” Seonghwa pulled Hongjoong into his lap now, holding his boyfriend tight. “You’re what!?” His mother yelled into the phone. “You’re having a baby!? Right before debut!? Are you an idiot!?” Hongjoong flinched, not expecting the harsh words from his mother. “Eomma…I’m happy, I’m having a baby with my boyfriend and I-“ , “no son of mine is having a baby before the most important part of his career! You’re getting rid of it right?” Seonghwa immediately took the phone from his boyfriend’s hand, “we aren’t getting rid of our baby! I’m going to take care of him and our baby. If you don’t want to support your son my family will have a good day.” Hanging up the phone Seonghwa tossed it aside.

“Hongjoong..are you okay?” He rubbed his boyfriends back gently, “she’s always supported me…why wouldn’t she support me having a baby?” The tears fell down his face, a soft sob shaking his frame. “Oh honey…it’s okay.” He held his boyfriend tightly, kissing his forehead. They’d figure this out together; they’d do what they could for their baby, no matter what.

•

The evening came faster than they expected; the couple dressed up and headed down to the lobby where Seonghwa’s mother was waiting, “hello boys! Hongjoong! It’s nice to see you!” The woman hugged him tightly as he opened his arms. “Eomma, nice to see you! Thank you for being supportive.” Seonghwa hugged his mother next, “yeah we appreciate the support we have so far.” Seonghwa’s mother nodded. “Of course, was Hongjoong’s mother not?” The couple shook their heads. “No…she asked if we were getting rid of our baby.” Hongjoong’s eyes filled with tears again. “Oh honey…it’s okay. You have the support of the Park family now.” Hongjoong felt a little better hearing that. “Thank you eomma, I appreciate it. Let’s head to dinner.”

The small group got into the car heading out to dinner, little did they know..someone had been listening in.

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

how to fake date your best friend | jake sim

✰ summary: the rules were simple -

pretend to be the boyfriend of you, his best friend who wants the attention of their crush, for a week and a week only

no kissing (bc gross cooties amirite) allowed, unless needed in times of desperate measure 

and no matter what, absolutely, most definitely, do not fall in love. 

simple, right?

well apparently not. because news flash––jake's already broken one of the rules. 

and to give you a hint, it's neither rule 1 or 2.

✰ pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. members of enha!] 

✰ genre: fluff, comedy | fakingdating!au, highschool!au, bestfriend!au, friends to lovers

✰ warnings: cursing, high-schoolers doing dumb highschool things, underage drinking (pls don’t actually do any of this irl), jake being a certified simp, it’s LONG (i’m so sorry), cheesy kithes bc im a sucker for kithes ( ˘ ³˘)♥

✰ wc: a whopping 9.5k

✰ a/n: it’s finally finished :’)))))) it ended up being much longer than i wanted but i had so much fun writing the characters that i got carried away lolol anywaysss i hope you guys enjoy it,,,i got a little unmotivated during the process bc i didn’t know if it was good or not but here it is heh (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ 

Tuesday, December 8th

Jake Sim lives a simple life. 

He likes to think he leads the normal, stereotypical life of a teenage boy. Has decent grades, plays soccer after school, skateboards around the neighborhood, has a best friend who he’s desperately in love with, and has a stable group of friends. 

Okay, maybe not so simple, because this boy would physically launch himself to the moon and drill at its surface to collect moon dust for you if you asked him to––despite his deadly fear of combusting in outer space. 

But that fear doesn’t even compare to his worst one yet: not having you in his life. 

And so, he decided to just repress any and all feelings he’s had for you ever since he discovered them in middle school, when he realized he hated seeing you go to the eighth grade dance with a date––that wasn’t him. 

He decided that he wasn’t going to risk losing a life-long friendship over some dumb, teenage boy feelings. 

They were probably powered by his testosterone anyways. Yeah, that’s totally it.

He’s totally not in love with you. 

So yes, he lives a pretty normal life. Every day is the same as the last, and tomorrow will be the same as today. But he likes it like that––he doesn’t want anything to change. 

Especially not now, when he finds himself content with every aspect of his life (okay maybe except for his history grade, god, does he hate history). 

So, it catches him off guard when you arrive at the group’s usual lunch table, located outside in your school’s courtyard, looking as excited as ever. 

Jake’s the only one at the table so far. The remaining usually showed up late––Heeseung spends his first half of lunch tutoring freshmen for community service hours (but the poor boy has no idea what he’s doing), Sunghoon is probably stuck in line in the cafeteria again (he always forgets to pack his own lunch), and Jay is...well actually, no one ever knows where Jay comes from. He’s a special one. 

It catches Jake even more off guard when you skip over any greeting a normal person would give, and start speaking at one hundred words per second. 

And that catches us up to the present.

“Y-You want me to what?” Jake’s stuttering as you stare at him with your hopeful eyes from across the lunch table. 

Despite the expression planted on your face, which screams your excitement for your “brilliant, amazing, genius, Einstein-could-never” idea (or whatever other words you used to describe it––Jake can’t exactly recall the specific terms you used, they all came out of your mouth too fast), you don’t respond to his question of bafflement. You continue to stare at him, awaiting his response. Jake could compare the look on your face right now to a puppy looking up at its owner, eagerly waiting for a treat. You know, tongue out and all. 

He swallows the lump that’s lodged in this throat (is that the sandwich he’s having, or his nerves?) and continues to give you his look of confusion laced with a nervous smile because surely, you’re joking. 

You grab what’s left of your sandwich from his hands and take your own bite. Somewhere in between you arriving at the table and now, Jake’s managed to steal the sandwich you brought today. You did make the best chicken sandwiches, in his defense. 

“Well? It’s only for the week! And I promise you, after one week, if nothing happens––if he doesn’t make a move or anything––I’ll move on from him like you’ve been telling me to.” Your words are muffled from you savoring your sandwich, or what’s left of it anyways. (Mental note to self: don’t share your lunch with Jake ever again.) 

When Jake still doesn’t respond (you’ve truly gotten this poor boy paralyzed), you find it as a sign to continue. 

“I think it’s the perfect plan. Plus, if it doesn’t work out, it’ll be like the universe is telling me to finally move on, right?” 

Wrong. 

Jake has been encouraging you to move on from your crush because well, if we’re being honest here, he selfishly wants you to himself. Even if it wasn’t romantically.

Preferably, he would kill to get to be the one who holds your hand in the hall, call you cheesy pet names, post disgustingly cute couple pics for the ‘gram––but for the sake of potentially ruining his relationship with you, he’ll just have to settle with the role of being your best friend. 

(And he’s totally fine with that! Totally. Yup.) 

But he didn’t think that you moving on would only be a mere possible outcome (that may not even happen!) from whatever this stunt is you wanna pull. 

Said stunt: Pretend to date one another and hope it catches the eye of a certain someone you have your eye on: Park Sunghoon. 

Ah yes, Park Sunghoon. The previously mentioned one who’s probably still in line waiting to get his lunch as we speak. 

Park Sunghoon, the tall, kind, intelligent, charming young boy that everyone knows. And if anyone didn’t know him, they most definitely knew of him. He wasn’t hard to miss in the halls; everything about him just radiates perfection. 

If you plucked a random high-schooler from the halls of this school and interviewed them on the Park Sunghoon, they’d say you’d be lucky enough if the quiet boy so much as sparked a conversation with you, even if it was about what last night’s chemistry homework was. 

Well if that were true, then you and the rest of the boys would be considered lottery winners. 

How that happened, how the four of you dysfunctional beings earned his friendship, the world may never know. However, Jake is fully convinced that this was the universe’s way of playing a cruel joke on him. 

For as long as Jake could remember, it’s always been just the two of you. You and Jake. Jake and you. (With the exception of Heeseung and Jay, of course, who came along in middle school) 

In fact, your earliest memory of Jake was when he peed his pants in the kindergarten during nap time. You would know, you had the privilege of sharing a sleeping mat with him that one fateful day and in result...let’s just say the smell didn’t wear off from your clothes until a week later. Five-year-old you didn’t forgive five-year-old Jake for the longest time. 

And since then, you’ve been attached by the hip. And Jake liked it like that. Jake didn’t need anyone else in his life (with the exception of Leila) if he had you. He had found his home within you, and he didn’t plan on sharing his space anytime soon. 

Nevertheless, the universe had a completely different idea for the two of you. 

Sunghoon came into the picture last year, towards the end of the school year. Despite being the new kid, he found his way into your cherished friend group and naturally, the five of you grew as close as friends could be. 

That was the problem. Jake wanted to hate Sunghoon, to despise him for being the one that you had heart eyes for, but he couldn’t. 

Not only was Sunghoon one of Jake’s closest friends, but he didn’t want to ruin the dynamic of the friend group. After you, the three chaotic boys were the next most important people in Jake’s life. 

And so, we have the typical love triangle plot that every coming-of-age movie follows. Of course, this is all unbeknownst to you––you may be intelligent and a people-person, but oh boy can you not see the heart eyes your very own best friend has for you. 

“It’ll be easier than you think, really! Look, we can even set boundaries or rules or whatever,” you propose, as if you’re trying to get him to sign a contract. 

Rules to a fake relationship? We’re not living in a Netflix romcom, are we? 

“Okay rule number 1: it’ll only be for a week and a week only, rule number 2: we don’t have to do anything too couple-ly like...” you pause to wonder for a second. 

“Like PDA or anything! You know, unless we really need to convince him,” you casually add. When he responds with radio silence and stares at you with absolute concern painted all over his face, you cough. “Jake, I’m joking.” 

Right. Of course. Obviously. 

“And of course, just try not to fall in love with me, it’ll be hard, I know,” you send a playful wink his way. 

Too late. Turns out it’s not that hard. Jake would know. 

Jake continues to stare at you in hesitation. Yeah, you’ve had your fair share of crazy ideas (that Jake always find himself agreeing to––the poor boy just can’t seem to say no to you), but fake dating you?

Jake is sure he wouldn’t be able to pull it off without slowly destroying himself. He’d just have to say no, he’s sure you can find someone else to do it for you. 

Yes, that’s it, just say no. 

Jake has to keep some of his pride in tact. 

Jake does not say no. 

He doesn’t know what went wrong. His mind said one thing, but his words said another. 

To be fair, Jake’s actions have always been influenced by his heart, not his brain, anyways. And when it comes to you, you bet it’ll be coming from his heart. 

So here he was now, under the stare of three equally shocked and confused guys across from you and him at the lunch table, your fingers intertwined with his.

Just a few seconds ago, you had spotted the rest of the lunch bunch approaching the table, and you quickly grabbed Jake’s hand and scooted in closer to him.  

Now here you were, explaining to your friends of your sudden relationship.  

Jake is too zoned out to even physically pick up your explanation. Something along the lines of "we’ve been dating for a while but didn’t want to tell you guys yet." From the feeling of your hand clutched tightly into his and your body right up next to him, his mind was short-circuiting. 

How is he supposed to last an entire week of this if he couldn't handle innocent hand holding? Hand holding? God, what are we, back in the fifth grade?  

Two minutes into this scheme and Jake's mind has already downgraded itself to a fifth grader's.  

Jake mentally scolds himself for giving in, this was not a good idea. 

It takes Jake approximately 12 hours to conclude that this stunt of yours may, actually, be a good idea. He knows this because approximately 12 hours after the events surrounding lunch, he receives a text from you: 

y/n [12:03AM]: thanks again for doing this for me jake

y/n [12:03AM]: ur actually the best

y/n [12:04AM]: ew ok that was cheesy but really i owe u a big one <333

Following your thread of texts is a really close up photo of you widely smiling into the camera. A smile so big, Jake’s convinced your face was probably in pain after taking that picture. 

Anyone else might’ve thought the photo looked borderline insane but because Jake’s Jake, aka a simpᵗᵐ for you, he comes to the conclusion that it’s singlehandedly the cutest thing he’s ever seen in the entire world. 

After quickly saving the selfie into his phone, Jake tells himself that maybe this won’t be a bad thing after all. I mean, anything that makes you smile like that meant it has to be a good idea, right? 

Spoken like a true simp. 

Plus, dating you––fake dating you––is pretty much the same as it was before. He already spends most of his days with you to begin with. Now, it’s just with added displays of affection. For show, obviously. Obviously. 

And look, if Jake will never get to actually be with you, then he’ll take what he can get. And if that meant fake dating you, well, he reasons that it’s better than nothing at all. 

Wednesday, December 9th 

Jake’s playing with the rings on your right hand and you’re in the middle of dramatically telling the lunch table about the infuriating Karen you had to deal with at work the other day when Jay comes up with a grin you all know a little too well. 

“Okay that grin means one of two things: you finally grew the balls to ask out that poor girl you’ve been teasing all year or you have something planned that we won’t like,” you interrupt your story when you catch Jay’s sly expression, evoking a chuckle from Jake, who’s now found a new distraction with the bracelets perches on your wrist. 

“Excuse you, I’ll have you know that I did ask her out. It just so happens that she’s currently ‘in between boyfriends’ whatever that means. Ouch, by the way,” Jay feigns hurt from your comment by clutching the area above his heart through his shirt. Ever the drama queen. “But yes, I do have something planned. And no, it’s not a bad idea.” 

Jay squeezes his way in between Sunghoon and Heeseung from across you and begins to pull out his own lunch. Everyone’s eyes follow him as he settles in because as bad as his unknown idea may be, you’re all still curious on what this boy has to say. 

“Well are you going to elaborate or...” Heeseung speaks up for everyone after you all mentally debate one another through darting eyes on who’s going to have to bite Jay’s silent bait.

Jay then forcefully sets both hands on his table, which elicits a little jump from you as you go for a bite of your sandwich. Adorable, Jake tells himself. 

“My parents are out of town this weekend. We all know what that means...” 

Yes. We do know what that means. The four of you have seen this scenario play out many times, a little too many times for your own good. 

This meant one of Jay’s infamous house parties that he always throws whenever his parents go out of town. And because his parents are hot-shot CEOs of an important company whose name you don’t remember (it’s nothing personal, your brain can only handle so much information and this physics exam you were studying for took up 90% of your brain capacity at the moment), they’re out of town often. 

And along with Jay’s parties comes chaos. Lots of it. And that’s because...well, it’s safe to say that despite the many school-wide presentations the police officers of your school have held in the auditorium on why you shouldn’t drink underage, Jay’s parents’ liquor cabinet always seems to find itself missing many a few bottles after each party. But we don’t talk about that. Shush. 

Almost simultaneously, everyone at the table lets out a groan, much to Jay’s disappointment. 

“C’mon guys! It’s been a while since anything’s fun happened to this school, think of all the sad students in that building right now,” he extends a finger whole-ass arm and points at your school, “who are in dire need of fun and a little...” he punctuates his sentence with the hand motion of chugging down a drink, followed with a gulping sound elicited from his tongue clicking. 

You roll your eyes along with everyone else. Don’t be like Jay, kids. Listen to those police officers. 

“Jay, it’s midterm season! I have an exam on Monday and I definitely do not want to spend the nights before wasted,” you give him an apologetic look. As crazy as Jay is, you do feel bad nonetheless. The boy just wants to have fun. 

Your response is followed up with similar comments from around the table. 

“I’m helping y/n study” 

“I have an important skating performance on Sunday” 

“Uh...my hamster died?” (ok Heeseung panicked, don’t blame the guy)

Ignoring that last excuse of an excuse, Jay continues his debate nonetheless. “Just come for the sake of it! No one’s saying you have to get wasted. Pleaseeee for me?” 

Jay throws these parties so often, you’re not sure why he’s so set on making sure you’re all going to be there. Well, I guess who wouldn’t want their closest friends to be at their own party? 

That and, Jay needs to make sure his friends are there to stop him from doing anything stupid. We all know this boy has had enough embarrassing moments to last him a lifetime. 

Everyone at the table gives each other the same hesitant look. Heeseung is the first to give in, “Oh fuck it. Sure, count me in.” 

Jay’s fist pumping the air before turning to Sunghoon with the most hopeful eyes. 

Sunghoon simply sighs in return. “Alright okay, I’ll bite. But if you vomit on my shoes again, I’m out the door.” Jay’s finger is automatically drawing a cross over his heart as a promise to not ruin Sunghoon’s Nikes again. 

He then looks to you with puppy eyes. 

You, who's already staring back at Jay with a stoic look in your eyes, are stubborn and (unlike the previous weaklings) are not as easy to convince. And somehow, this began an unannounced staring contest between the two of you, a contest to see who would budge first. This isn't an uncommon occurrence between you and Jay, but the rest of the boys are still on the edges of their seats watching this duel.

Jake casually wraps an arm around your shoulder and you’re brought in close, but still undeterred from your death-stare match with the boy across from you. 

If it’s not obvious enough, Jake’s really gotten into his role of being your boyfriend, despite it only being 24 hours since he last froze at your touch. Character development, you’ll give him that. 

You almost forget he’s faking it for a quick second. And for an even quicker second, you imagine he wasn’t faking it. And you swear you feel butterflies in your stomach at that thought. 

Weird. 

You mentally shake the thought out of your head. Priorities first, aka, beating Jay in this staring contest. 

“Fuck,” you stutter when you finally blink, admitting defeat to a grinning Jay. “Okay, okay, I’ll THINK about it. I’ll let you know.” 

Not exactly the answer Jay was looking for, but he’ll take it. Better than a no. 

He turns to Jake next, knowing there’s no way Jake will turn down a party. Just like Jay, the boy loves himself a good party. 

But–

But because Jake would take your physics exam this Monday for you if you asked, because Jake would bungee jump in the Grand Canyon without a safety net below him if you asked, because Jake would fake date you to make your crush jealous for you if you asked, he doesn’t hesitate in his answer this time around: “Same as y/n, I’ll let you know.” 

Jay looks at Jake. Then back at you, who he’s still clinging onto like a koala to a tree. Then back at Jake. “You two are gross. Admittedly cute. But gross.” 

You look up at the boy next to you to see him already grinning at you. 

For the first time today, you find yourself agreeing with Jay. 

Admittedly cute. 

Thursday, December 10th 

You are having a bad day. 

You’re having the mother of bad days. 

Not only is it midterm season, but you still have all your regular weekly assignments to finish before Friday hits. So as a natural-born procrastinator does, you stayed up all last night trying to get a good amount of work done because what’s better than cramming all your work the night before it’s due? Doing it two nights before it’s due. 

Well apparently it wasn’t such a good idea. Because now, here you were, frantically throwing on whatever articles of clothing you find nearest to you because you slept through all your alarms. 

You’re lucky enough to make it through your school’s doors right as the second bell rings, even if you did look like you just walked straight out of a zombie apocalypse. 

You’re not so lucky when you find out your first class of the day, calculus, had a pop quiz. A pop quiz on the only unit you just happened to know absolutely nothing about. 

To top things off, you forgot to pack your lunch during this morning’s frenzy, meaning you’re automatically stuck sharing with Jake.

And because his mother started making him pack his own food out of a lesson of responsibility (she said something along the lines of: “Jake, you’re about to be in college and you don’t know how to pack a decent meal”), he only has a plain PB&J sandwich and a pack of Scooby-Doo gummies in his bag today (because newsflash, he still doesn’t know how to pack a decent meal). 

Not that you could care less at the moment, you were too preoccupied with catching up on your assignments to even eat. And if any of the boys noticed your zombie-like state during lunch, they did a good job of not mentioning it. They knew better than to bother an irritated y/n. 

Somehow, you make it through the entire school day and your after-school meeting for environmental club (save the trees!) in one piece. As you finally walk out of the school building, you exhale, automatically feeling lighter. At least the hard part of your day was done. 

Now you just had to wait for Jake to finish soccer practice, which usually ended around the same time as your club, and he can drive you home, where you can continue being irritated with your day in the privacy of your own space. 

You wait on the steps of the school’s entrance, waiting for a smiley Jake to come around the corner as he usually does at 5:30pm every Thursdays. 

Yes, a smiling Jake is exactly what you needed to make your day ten times better, you conclude. 

As if on cue, you hear a ding from your phone. 

Jake [5:30PM]: ugh coach is extending practice for “team bonding” 

Jake [5:30PM]: idek what team bonding is 

Jake [5:31PM]: you ok if i cant drive you today? :// 

It’s as if the universe decided to use you as its punching bag today. 

You physically let out a distorted groan, not caring if anyone who happened to hear you thought you were a creature from out of this world, as you send him a text back.

y/n [5:32PM]: it’s all good lol have fun with tEaM bOnDiNg

Things were not all good. But no matter how upset you may be, you weren’t going to project your negative vibes onto Jake’s naturally positive ones. So you get up from the stone steps and begin your dreaded walk back home. 

It’s freezing out. You should’ve known better to just throw on a hoodie and call it a day when it’s the middle of December. But then again, you figured by now you’d be in the comfort and warmth of Jake’s car and presence...not walking home in these freezing temperatures. 

You think about Jake and how he’s probably currently suffering from not only his team bonding exercises (but really though, what are team bonding exercises?), but doing them in this weather as well. The poor boy. 

You’re quickly broken out of your thoughts by the sound of a car engine from behind you. When you don’t see it pass by you and instead hear it pull over and park next to the curb of the sidewalk you’re currently on, you automatically deduce that this is it, this is my time, I’m about to get kidnapped by whoever it is behind me but y/n, you should probably turn around and check first before you drive yourself insane in this inner dialogue. 

You turn around and squint into the front window of the car. If it were a kidnapper, this is exactly what your mother told you not to do. Her exact words were: “Run, don’t look back, and scream bloody murder.” 

Good thing it wasn’t. Just an innocent Sunghoon waving his hand at you, motioning you to get in. 

“Sunghoon?” You approach his car and stop at the passenger side’s open window. 

“y/n! It’s freezing out, I’ll drive you home c’mon,” he nods his head towards the passenger side door. 

Well, how could you say no? Sunghoon owns a nice car. Like a nice car. Like car-seat-heaters-that-make-you-feel-like-you’re-physically-melting nice. Beats getting hypothermia outside, right? 

“Why are you going home from school so late?” You ask as you settle into his car, instantly melting at the touch of the aforementioned heated seats. 

“Debate club, actually. Decided I needed another personality trait other than ice skating,” he starts the engine and begins driving towards the direction of your neighborhood. 

You laugh at his comment, you didn’t peg him as a debate kind of student. Quiet Sunghoon? Debate club? If 2 plus 2 is four...

“Hey, I don’t call you the Ice Prince for nothing! Also, don’t forget your other personality trait: forgetting your lunch every day.” 

Sunghoon quickly glances over at you to send you a dirty look (because eyes on the road, kids!), which you return with a cheeky grin. “Need I remind you that was you today?” 

“Touché,” you click your tongue. 

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, the faint sound of Sunghoon's music in the background filling in the quietness.  

You’re humming along until Sunghoon breaks the silence, “Did Jake get stuck at practice again?” 

You don’t know why, but you swear you feel your heart beat faster at the mention of Jake’s name. No, that was always there right? Because you were with Sunghoon...your crush..obviously. Obviously. 

Ignoring the feeling, you turn your attention towards the boy driving you. 

“Oh yeah, something about team bonding. How’d you know?” 

“Eh, I just figured since he wasn’t driving you home like he always does.” He turns into your neighborhood. 

You nod at his answer. 

“You two make a good couple.” 

You whip your head at him. Did you hear him correctly?

“It was about time, really. You two have been ogling at one another for so long, Heeseung, Jay, and I almost placed bets on who would be the first to make a move.” 

He keeps his eyes on the road, casually going on about how you and Jake make the cutest couple he’s ever seen. 

You're frozen, unsure of what to think, let alone say. 

You think to two days ago, when you started this entire fake relationship because of the very boy driving you home right now. The same boy who's complimenting you on your fake relationship. The same boy who's supposed to be jealous over that said relationship. The same boy you’re supposed to be crushing over.

But now...only a mere 48 hours later, you were finding yourself okay with the fact that he was happy for you. And for the life of you, you couldn’t remember why you liked Sunghoon in the first place. Not saying he isn’t one to be crushed on, I mean, look at the guy. 

Maybe, just maybe, it had something to do with the fact that you didn't feel nervous or giddy or..anything at all when you got into the car with Sunghoon. At least, not until Jake's name was mentioned. That's when you felt the butterflies. At the mention of Jake.  

Jake. 

Weird. 

But before you can come to a conclusion on why you're feeling the way you do, Sunghoon interrupts your thoughts.  

"Well, we're here! Say hi to your parents for me," he pulls into your driveway as you're still collecting your thoughts.  

You give him a quick thanks and one last wave as you enter the front doors of your house.  

Seeing that your only solution towards confusing feelings meant distracting yourself, distract yourself you did.  

Even if it meant distracting yourself with your piling assignments.  

The next time you look up from your work, it's suddenly way past sundown and a heavy storm has taken over. You’re surprised it hasn’t started flooding yet with the amount of rainfall you were hearing. 

You check the time on your phone, the bright 8:16PM on the screen illuminating your dimly lit room. Seeing that neither of your parents have yet to be home from work, it looks like you were going to have to settle with some instant ramen for dinner tonight.  

As you trudge down the stairs of your home, the sound of light knocking against the front door catches your attention. It's been a long day y/n, you're probably hearing things, it's definitely just the rain.

Nope. There it is again, but much louder. Much more urgent.  

You contemplate any and all potential disasters that could happen from answering the door. Only a crazy person would be willing to go out in this hurricane-like weather to be frantically knocking on your door.  

And so, you assume it has to be some psychopath trying to get into your house. Yes, there’s definitely no other logical explanation. 

You scramble around your living room, looking for the next best weapon to defend you. Resorting to the flower vase your mother keeps on the table next to the front door, you hold it out in front of you, as if you're waiting for the door to burst open.  

The knocking continues, gradually getting louder. You mentally curse at yourself for dropping out of the taekwondo class your dad signed you up for when you were younger.  

Vase in hand, you swing open the door and brace for–

"Jake? What the fuck? Get in here, you're gonna get sick!"  

You’re suddenly aware of how stupid you look, holding a light pink vase with a couple of orchids as your only form of self-defense...for it to only be your own best friend. You immediately put it back on the table as Jake quickly rushes past you and into your humble abode.  

You close the door behind you and turn to face the soaked boy.  

“I come bearing gifts, also known as take-out and hot chocolate from that one cafe you love. Also my company, if you’ll take it. I had a feeling you weren’t having the best day today,” he’s simply standing there, holding up a large brown paper bag in one hand, and a deliciously smelling cup of hot chocolate in the other, but you’re looking at him as if he bought you the Moon. 

You stare in awe at the angel of a boy in front of you, silently thanking the stars for gifting you this amazing human being as your best friend. You don’t know what you did to deserve him. 

You give him a soft smile. “Jake, you didn’t have to. It’s practically a shitstorm out there,” you cock your head towards the window, showcasing the downpour of cats and dogs outside. Jake stays by the entrance as you go down the hall and through your house’s linen closet to find a spare towel for the drenched boy.

“Nah it’s no big deal, really. Just fulfilling my duties as your loyal boyfriend,” he grins, even though you can’t see him. He likes calling himself that. Your boyfriend.

Jake continues to shake his messy hair to get the excess rain off, giving a mental apology to whoever is going to have to mop up the puddle forming on the floor due to his unannounced visit. Probably you. 

Jake hears you laugh down the hall. “You’re really invested in your role, huh? Keep this up and you might actually trick me into believing you’re my actual boyfriend.” 

Actual boyfriend? Jake likes the sound of that. Maybe he will keep this up then.

Jake doesn’t have much experience in acting, unless you count that time he played the role of Town Villager #3 in the third grade play, so he never found it as one of his interests. But playing the role of your boyfriend was one he was willing to fulfill for the rest of life, even if it was just for show. 

Jake doesn’t respond to your comment, he’s instead self-aware of his blushing cheeks, thankful that you’re too busy rummaging through your linen closet to take notice. 

“Plus, you didn’t have lunch today and I had feeling you were going to be too caught up in your work to feed yourself anything other than instant ramen,” he sets down his gifts to you on your living room’s coffee table as you come around the corner, fresh towel and new set of clothes in hand. 

His eyes fall on the familiar looking pair of sweatpants and hoodie resting on the palms of your hands. 

Hm. A little too familiar. 

Then, it clicks in his head. 

His eyes narrow at you as you giggle at his reaction, “Oh, so it takes me getting drenched in the rain for you to finally return my clothes that I’ve been missing!?” 

“Hey! I’m not returning them, simply loaning them out to a friend who’s in dire need. You basically gifted them to me the second you left them here months ago.” 

“You’re annoying.” 

“Love you too,” you toss the clothes at him and take a seat on the floor around your coffee table, prepping the table with the boxes of Chinese food Jake supplied. 

After Jake changes into the stolen dry clothes, he takes a seat next to an already-eating you at the coffee table. 

“You. are. my lord and savior Sim Jaeyun,” you’re saying with your mouth full of fried rice. You sigh from satisfaction and rest your head against Jake’s shoulder as you continue chewing. He grins as he helps himself to his own serving of fried rice and orange chicken. 

You look up at him from your spot, “How was team bonding today?” 

Jake groans in response, clearly annoyed. “Stupid. I don’t get how doing trust falls and pyramid building is going to get us any closer. If anything, I almost FELL off that pyramid today!” 

You don’t know why, but you find yourself admiring him and his soft features as he continues to rant about one of his teammates, specifically, the one who almost dropped him. 

The way his messy hair, unkept from the rain ruining it, almost covers his eyes (but you tell yourself you like it this way, it looks more natural on him), the way the corners of his lips are always perked upwards (even when he’s ranting), the way his eyes sparkle whenever he’s truly passionate about whatever he’s talking about, the way his eyes look at you like–

“Stare much? Look, I get you can’t resist my good looks but at least be subtle about it,” he smirks at you as he takes another spoon of rice. 

You break out of his trance and scoff at him. 

“You’re cute when you rant,” you nonchalantly say as you move from your spot to mirror his actions and add more rice to your plate as well.  Jake’s stills at your sudden comment, unsure of how to respond. Lucky for him, you’re distracted by the mountain of food on your plate to even notice the blushing mess of a boy next to you. 

“You know, you’re lucky you’re cute. Or else I’d deck you right here and now for ditching me after school today.” 

Anddd there goes the moment. Leave it to you to follow up a compliment with a threat of violence. 

Jake finds it cute anyways. He always finds you cute. 

Jake narrows his eyes and lightly shoves you before an apology is written all over his face. “Sorry about that by the way. I feel awful about making you walk home when it was freezing out.” 

“Nah, it’s okay. Sunghoon gave me a ride, actually. Did you know he does debate? I guess you learn something new everyday,” you ramble, unaware of the boy next to you getting tense at the sudden mention of the other’s name. 

Up until now, Jake’s completely forgotten about Sunghoon's involvement in this entire scheme. In fact, the past 48 hours with you have felt so normal, so comfortable, he almost forgot about the deal in the first place.   “You think he has any clue?” Jake suddenly asks, referring to the plan. 

You immediately know what he’s referring to, as Jake practically worded out your very own thoughts. 

You shrug. “Not a single one. We’re practically William and Kate in his eyes. But honestly, that’s the least of my worries right now. I’m too distracted by my exams right now to care.” 

Jake feels guilty for being satisfied with your answer. He’s 100% sure that if convincing Sunghoon took you two an entire lifetime of fake dating, he’d be all too willing to do it. 

“Go to Jay’s party with me tomorrow,” he abruptly says, catching your attention as your mouth is stuffed. Cute. 

He pokes your cheek. “It’ll get your mind off of work and plus, what’s more convincing than showing up to a party with your amazing boyfriend?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you. Jake doesn’t know where he gets his sudden surge of confidence. But he does know he loves calling himself your boyfriend...even if it’s for the time being. 

Rolling your eyes and swatting his poking fingers away from your face, you ponder on his suggestion. 

“You mean my annoying boyfriend,” you stick your tongue out at him. Jake takes a mental picture and hopes it never leaves his mind. 

“But I guess you could be right. Maybe I can clear my head for the night before I study my ass off all weekend.” 

Friday, December 11th 

The party does not clear your mind. 

If anything, it gives you enough headaches to last you at least until the end of high-school. 

You come to this revelation as you and Jake approach Jay’s home, a luxurious mansion sitting at the end of a cul-de-sac, lined with similarly luxurious palaces, located in an equally luxurious neighborhood. 

You come to this revelation when you can already feel the pounding bass of music as you walk up Jay’s driveway. 

You come to this revelation when, not even two seconds after entering Jay’s front doors––

“You’re here!” A buzzed Jay shouts at the two of you, causing the both of you to contemplate your past choices that brought you here today. Jay definitely isn’t straight up drunk yet, but Jake still makes a mental note to keep an eye on him tonight. Just in case. 

The blonde-haired boy is quick to hand over two red solo cups of god knows what, to which you and Jake immediately put down on the nearest table after Jay walks away to greet the next incoming guests (you know, to not hurt his feelings). 

You and Jake are lucky enough to have been around Jay and his parties long enough to know that going all out at these parties will not be pretty the next morning.

You cringe at the memory of last year, when you had to suffer from possibly the worst hangover of all hangovers after one of Jay’s parties. Jake will never let you forget how miserable you looked the next morning. His camera roll’s album titled “y/n blackmail pics” can vouch for that.

“Remind me again to never listen to you,” you almost have to shout at Jake over the thumping music. Jake laughs at your comment and tugs at your hand as he begins entering the house.

The two of you do your rounds of greetings to the people you know...and random underclassmen who you swear you have never seen before but somehow made it to this party. You’ve always questioned how Jay’s invite list worked. Maybe there isn’t one. That would explain how it looked like someone announced Jay was giving out free Teslas and the entire school got hold of the news. 

“Thank god you guys are here,” you hear a voice come from behind the two of you as you guys leave the main room to enter the house’s smaller, but just as luxurious looking, den. You turn to see Heeseung with Sunghoon following closely behind, trying his best not to get swept away in the crowd of people. 

The den is where you usually stayed during these parties. It’s not like there are rules of where people are allowed to party, by any means, but it’s like how a high-school’s cafeteria worked. There’s a mutual silent agreement of where everyone goes, and the den is where the party host and his friends went.  

“Okay, is it just me, or is tonight’s party just a little...too..much?” Sunghoon asks as the four of you take your seats on the main couch of the room. Jake’s quick to make space for you next to him as you go to sit, but to his surprise, you find your home right on his lap. 

“You said be convincing right?” you say into his ear as you settle yourself. Right. That’s totally why. Because you had to go along with the ruse. Obviously. 

You shift a bit so you’re more facing sideways, not blocking off Jake’s line of vision as the boy himself is..well, calling him a rag doll might be excessive. 

But he’s sure he looks like one right now, having lost all senses in his limbs, leaving him frozen underneath you. 

Jake Sim is the epitome of politeness. He was raised in a family that taught him how to respectfully greet others, how to always offer food to others before eating it himself, how to properly treat a significant other. As a result, Jake grew up to be one of the sweetest, kindest, purest people to ever walk this earth. 

(Relatively speaking, the earth is large, but so is Jake’s heart.) 

But human-beings aren’t perfect, they must have a balance. A balance of pros and cons. 

Sure, he can’t pack his own lunch and sometimes forgets to water the little succulent you gifted him that’s currently seated on his window sill. Sure, sometimes he’s too sweet for his own good, you know, like willing-to-be-your-fake-boyfriend too sweet. But aside from the minor details, Jake Sim doesn’t have many cons, no. 

But he sure can be awkward. 

And so because Jake Sim is sweet, kind, pure, and awkward, he is unsure of what to do with himself when you’re seated right on top of him. 

As if you could read his befuddled mind, you take his arm that’s resting behind you to wrap around your waist as your support as you throw one of your arms around his shoulder. And throughout this entire adjustment, his widened eyes are staring right at you. 

Bless this pure, pure boy. 

Also bless the position you’re in, blocking the two other boys from directly seeing Jake’s face. Because if they were to catch glimpse of Jake’s expression right now, your cover might be blown, just like that. You’re lucky Heeseung and Sunghoon are distracted by another classmate who came up to them. 

“Relax,” you sweetly laugh, cupping his chin with your free hand and lightly squeezing his cheeks. “You’re so adorably awkward.” 

Jake pouts at you. “I am not awkward!” 

“Right, and I’m totally dating you for real,” you playfully whisper at him, eliciting a poke at your waist in response. 

Twenty minutes of people-watching-aka-“who do you think is gonna pass out first?”-from-your-spot-on-the-couch later, the four of you draw your attention to the rowdy party host you all have the honor of calling your friend––aka Jay––dancing (that is, if you call wildly swinging your limbs in all four directions dancing) in the middle of the den. 

"Oh god, look at him," Sunghoon voices from besides you.

Heeseung's already filming the moment on his phone. Ah yes, technology. The best thing to ever happen to drunk teens' friends.  

"He's so wasted," you throw your head back as you let out a laugh. “We should help the kid out.” 

Poor Jay. He's not gonna hear the end of it after tonight.

"I don't know why he thinks these parties are such a good idea when he knows how trashed he's gonna be when he wakes up," Jake says, his hand naturally squeezing your waist as you giggle at his comment. "And how trashed the house will be."  

Jay slumbers over to where the four of you are seated, and abruptly stops right in front of the couch.

"My best friends!" Jay happily cheers. “Having fun?” 

“Watching you? Always,” you say to the boy who’s squeezing into a seat between you and Sunghoon, as if the small couch wasn’t already suffocating enough (and that’s with you on Jake’s lap). 

“But for real though, you should probably lay off the drinks for now,” Heeseung insists. “For all our sakes.” 

Sunghoon nods along and grabs the cup Jay’s currently nursing and sets it down where it’s out of Jay’s reach, much to his dismay. But the disappointment quickly leaves the dazed boy’s head, as his attention is now directed towards you and Jake. 

“Well if it isn’t mom and dad,” Jay turns to face you and Jake, certainly amused by your seating arrangement. 

“You know–” Jay points a finger at the two of you. “For a couple that’s certainly close, I haven’t seen you two kiss.” 

Jake is immediately coughing, certainly not expecting that to come out of his friend’s mouth. 

“Okay and your point is?” Jake frowns at Jay. If Jay wasn’t tipsy, Jake would’ve smacked the back of his head by now. 

“I’m just saying...” the blonde responds, both hands up in the air as if Jake is accusing him of something, when in was, in fact, the opposite. “But nevermind, Jakey boy here is probably too innocent for such nonsense anyways.” 

Yes, it’s confirmed. Once Jay sobers up tomorrow, Jake is driving over to his house (even though it’s a good ten minute drive from his own) just to smack him. 

“What do you mean I’m too–” 

Jake doesn’t finish his sentence. In fact, Jake doesn’t even remember what he was going to say. 

Jake doesn’t think nor feel anything else other than your lips planted on his. 

You’re pulling him in close, your hands cupping his face as his own are twitching on your waist, his mind flustered. You move your hands from his face to his neck, to which Jake immediately relaxes at. 

Sure, you two are in the middle of a dumb high-school party, one filled with pounding music and shouting teenagers, but right now, in this moment, Jake can only feel you. And he doesn’t want the feeling to ever stop. 

When you part, Jake’s eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips, his own parted in shock. He thinks he might pass out right here and now. He thinks his heart might explode right here and now. He thinks he might lov-

“Happy?” you turn to a satisfied Jay, ignoring the looks of amusement from Heesung and Sunghoon besides him. 

“Well,” you pat Jake’s leg as you get up from your spot. “I’m gonna get us some drinks. Punch only, of course.” 

Jake’s eyes are on you as you walk away, his face tinted pink from the adrenaline of it all, his heart racing. 

Jake thinks back to three days ago, when he told himself that this idea of yours was going to be all fine. After all, it was only going to be for one week. Afterwards, he can move on with his life as if nothing happened. 

But fast forward 72 hours later, 72 hours after you and Jake started this act, 72 hours after Jake told himself it’ll be all fine, Jake knows he was poorly mistaken.

Because 72 hours later, in the middle of a party that reeked of the combined smell of alcohol and sweat, Jake knows one thing and one thing for sure.

He never wants to move on from the feeling of being with you. He never wants to move on from this.

From you. 

He’s screwed. 

Saturday, December 12th 

When Jake wakes up, much later than he intended to, on Saturday morning, the first sensation he feels are his tingling lips, still in disbelief that they graced your own last night. 

The second sensation being his pounding mind––it’s running through ten million thoughts at a time, telling him no last night wasn’t a dream. 

Third: his heart beating so fast at the thought of you, he thinks he might beat out of his chest.

And fourth, a buzzing noise. 

Jake blindly flounders his arm to the table beside him in hopes of finding the origin of the annoying sound, aka, his phone. 

After knocking down multiple miscellaneous items on his nightstand (he makes a mental note to clean his room later), he successfully retrieves the item of search. 

Jake squints at the bright screen, mind still cloudy from a mix of 1) being half-asleep, and 2) still processing what happened the night before. 

y/n [11:10AM]: r u awake yet? 

y/n [11:22AM]: imma take that as a no

y/n [11:35AM]: lemme know when ur up 

jake [11:44AM]: just woke up sorry 

jake [11:44AM]: are you okay? what’s up

y/n [11:45AM]: r u busy? 

y/n [11:45AM]: kinda wanted to talk abt smth

jake [11:45AM]: uh well no im still in bed lmao

y/n [11:46AM]: cool im outside your door 

Jake’s eyes widen as he processes your last few texts. 

Talk? Outside his door? 

Jake’s heart is nervously pounding as jumps out of bed and quickly puts on the first plaid flannel he finds. He scrambles to his mirror and gives his reflection a quick run-down. 

He’s sporting your his favorite hoodie underneath the flannel that’s long overdue a wash and his tousled hair has seen better days, but he couldn't care less. 

Before his mind can catch up to his actions, he’s rushing down the stairs, skipping two at a time and to this front door. Because he didn’t want to keep you waiting? Because he was too excited to see you? Maybe a mix of both. Definitely more of the latter, however. 

He quickly runs a hand through his hair to try to fix it up as much as he can, to no avail, before opening the door to reveal you, sitting on the steps of his front porch. 

“y/n,” he’s breathing heavily as you turn to greet him with your sweet smile he didn’t even realize he was missing. Is it possible to miss someone overnight? Jake concludes yes, it definitely is. 

“Did you run down here or something?,” you question his out-of-breath state, a teasing tone laces the tip of your tongue. 

“Or something,” Jake mutters as he closes the front door behind him to join you on the steps when you make no sign of moving. “Have you been out here all morning?” 

“Not allll morning. I had a feeling you’d sleep in so I came around the time I first texted you. Would’ve knocked but didn’t wanna bother your family,” you hum, keeping your eyes trained on the peaceful scenery around you. 

You’ve always loved Jake’s neighborhood, it brought you a sense of peace, a sense of home. 

Or was that because it reminded you of Jake? 

“You could never be a bother,” he quickly rebuttals as he takes his seat next to you on the steps. 

You respond with a soft smile before turning your attention back to anything other than the boy next to you. Your mind seems to be lost in its own thoughts, Jake can tell by the distant look in your eyes. 

The sound of birds chirping in the distance fills the silence that falls between the two of you. 

Any other day, Jake would love this. He savors every second he’s with you, even if it’s just pure silence. 

But this silence was different. It wasn’t the usual comforting, warm silence that the two of you share on a typical day. This one held tension, tension so thick that Jake doesn’t know where to begin thinking. 

But here’s the thing. Jake doesn’t think. 

Not when it comes to you. 

He takes a deep breath. Rubs his hands together. Pats them on his lap. Turns towards you. 

“Look, I-” 

“I think I might like you.” The words come out of your mouth so fast, Jake’s positive he heard you wrong the first time around. 

He whips his head to meet your eyes, your own already staring back at him, your bottom lip nervously tucked under your teeth. 

“No, I––I do. I know I do. I’m sorry. I didn’t know how to tell you and I don’t think I’m doing a very good job right now,” the words are all of the sudden tumbling out of your mouth as if your brain flipped a switch and isn’t able to turn it off. “In hindsight, I should’ve known better to fake date my own best friend. But these past few days made me realize how much I love being with you. And not like how I’m always with you 24/7 before this entire thing started, but being with you. I even started getting that weird, bubbly feeling in my stomach every time I so much as heard your name. And then last night at the party, I realized afterwards that I wouldn’t have kissed you if some part of me didn’t see you in that way. Even if it meant Jay would’ve been on our asses all night if I didn’t. So yeah.” 

You finish with a deep breath and look up at him to meet his widened eyes. Silence.

Jake thought he was braindead during last week’s history quiz. Jake thought he was braindead when he had to cram a semester’s worth of chemistry content the night before his exam. Heck, Jake thought he was braindead when you first told him about your idea of a fake dating him. But no, this is braindead.

He’s finally hearing what he’s been dreaming of for so long, and of all times, now his brain decides to shut off.  

“Are you..uh..are you gonna say anything?” You’re nervously fumbling with your hands, desperate to distract yourself with anything else apart from his silent stare. 

"Why are you sorry?" Jake says before his mind can think of anything else. He doesn't pay attention to his thumping heart that's one look-from-you away from exploding right then and there. "You didn't do anything wrong. If anything, you took the words right out of my mouth.” 

Now you're staring at him with the wide eyes, the words processing in your mind.

Jake realizes he's waited too long to do this. A few years too long. He also realizes he shouldn't have put on that extra layer of a flannel. The nervous tension created by the two of you was suffocating enough, and being outside under the bright sun didn’t help. 

"I like you too. God y/n, I like you too so much," Jake doesn't even care if his words are all sorts of messed up right now. He just needs you to get the idea. "I have for a while now.” 

You let out a relieved sigh, ecstasy rushing through your blood. “Really? I think I have for a while too. I’m so stupid, it took me so long to realize it. It didn’t hit me until I realized how I felt around you, compared to the guy I’m supposed to actually have a crush on.” 

Jake lets out a laugh, the tension immediately dissolving. “Hey, if it wasn’t for Sunghoon, I don’t think we’d be here right now.” 

“You’re right, I’m too oblivious and you’re too awkward to actually make a move,” you wink at him. If his heart wasn’t fluttering at the sight of you, on his porch on a Saturday morning, confessing your feelings to him, Jake probably would’ve lightly shoved you away. 

Instead, he’s turning to you with the most endeared look on his face, and you’re blushing underneath his gaze.

“What? Stare much?” You giggle, quoting the boy himself as you shyly duck your head to avoid his stare. 

Jake gently grabs your chin to tilt your face towards his, and before you can process what’s happening, he suddenly meets your lips with his own, closing the gap between you two. 

Jake thinks if the ground underneath him right now decided to open up and swallow him whole, he’d die happily. 

Jake smiles against you, feeling comfort in ways he’ll never be able to achieve without you. 

Your hands instinctively find their way into his hair, as one of his rests below your ear, thumb softly caressing your cheek, the other pulling you in by the waist. He’s naturally leaning into you, gravitating towards your warmth, unable to stop the giddy feeling bubbling in his stomach. 

He doesn’t think the feeling will ever go away. 

When you pull away to catch your breath, you rest your head against the nook of his neck, basking in his presence as his arms both find their way around your waist. You sigh in pleasure. 

“Remember at the beginning of all of this, when you told me ‘Just try not to fall in love with me?’” Jake gently says. Jake feels the slight nod you give against his shoulder as you hum in response. 

Jake whispers two more words into your ear, filling you with happiness and warmth you know you won’t be able to find through anyone––or anything––else. 

“Too late.” 

✰ if you made it ‘til the end, ily :’))))) 

[endobiologist]

Trans Guy Tips #5; Dressing Good

Today, we're going to talk about basic fashion, and some things trans guys specifically need to know when buying a new wardrobe.

Some of these rules can always be broken, it's your body and your choice what to put on it!

However, this is a guide for passing better, so feminine and androgynous looks will not be covered here, only the traditional masculine. I will most likely make a guide out on dressing that way later.

1. Match colors, but don't be afraid to throw in some accent detail colors! Usually when you think of fashion, you think of making everything match, however some things will go better with some contrast rather than plainly matching!

As long as it still has some similarity, it doesn't have to be the same.

The most basic rule you need to learn dressing as a man, is that you wear your belt to your shoes.

If your belt is brown, so should your shoes be.

If your belt is black, they should be black.

Usually most fashion rules can be broken, but this one seems to be very important, as it can throw off the whole appearance of an outfit to have mismatching shoes and belt.

2. Use what I call the finger trick.

When selecting a shirt, specifically a dress shirt, put your fingers in the collar between your neck and the collar.

If you can comfortably fit two or even maybe barely three fingers in there, then that's a perfect fit shirt around your neck.

If you can fit four or more fingers, it's loose and will make you look baggy and overweight.

If you can fit only one, or feel any pressure on your throat, you need a looser shirt because it's too tight.

3. Somewhat similar, but when buying pants, this may be the most important thing of all.

If you get the right set of pants, it can disguise even the biggest of curves.

You want to get what's known as a straight-leg jean pant, you can make it a cargo pant if you wish, either one looks very masculine and good.

I would usually recommend bootcut pants if you wear longer shoes, like boots, or combat boots, or anything you need to tuck the jeans into.

Always get pants that don't feel constricting, and always get them where they fit comfortably with a belt, but don't need a belt due to fitting good already.

But straight-leg type is so important to go for, it's one of the things that makes a boxy figure like a cis man's.

4. I'm not sure if this is obvious or may come as a surprise to some people, but even if you like dressing femininely, if you wish to pass, I would suggest always shopping in the men's section.

They have shirts and pants and everything else under the sun that shaped specifically for men's bodies, making yours look even more like a cis man's, which is very gender affirming. Also women's jeans are made to support the butt and make you look feminine and curvy, while men's are designed to be straight, boxy, and comfortable, usually with deep pockets too!

5. Similar to the matching rule before, you can match a busy pattern shirt with a plain pair of pants, or busy pattern and pants with a plain shirt. However if you put too many busy patterns, or too much plainness, either way makes you look not as good.

Try to balance the detail with the simplicity.

6. Overall the most masculine thing you can wear especially pre-t, is either a formal or casual suit.

You can even wear just a dress shirt with a tie or bow tie, with some dress shoes and pants, and you're good!

This just generally makes you look super masculine and it's hard to mistake.

7. if you're like me, where you like to dress flamboyantly, but you're also super dysphoric about it, wait until you get testosterone therapy.

If you end up having it and you start seeing positive effects before dressing femininely, it's great!

I did this and now I feel totally comfortable with it, as no one ever misunderstands me even if I wear the most feminine things ever.

So if you're going on t, feel free to dress more extravagantly during because you will pass even so!

8. Another way to check shirts that are long sleeved, particularly dress shirts, is to tuck it in like usual, and then lift up your arms really high like you're reaching for something.

If it untucks or lifts the fabric in an unflattering way where your armpits look huge, it's cut wrong and is not something you should buy.

9. This may be surprising to some, but yes, cis men will wear feminine designs on masculine outfits.

I can't count the number of times I've seen men wearing bright pink suits. Other times there's been crop tops, painted nails, hair done, everything.

So if you really like that button up with the flowers on it, but are feeling hesitant due to the feeling that people might judge you, don't worry!

Maybe some will, but a lot of people wear unique clothing, and no one will be as bad as what your thoughts say to you.

10. I have somewhat of a warning, as good and fun they are, t-shirts can be very revealing when it comes to showing your chest, even through your binder! Something about them isn't cut quite right, even if they come from the manliest man's site or store.

If you still wish to wear t-shirts like I do, I would recommend getting a short-sleeved or long-sleeved Dickies button up jacket/shirt that you wear open over it. Or any jacket thing, really. This covers your chest completely and negates that effect.

11. This is sort of more hygiene base but still has to do with getting dressed. Always use men's soap, and men's cologne, and men's essential oils, and men's lotion, if you have them.

Also use some aftershave, it's helpful if it has lotion mixed in and moisturizes as well.

You can even shave even if you're pre-t, due to it making a clean feeling due to there being no feminine peach fuzz on it. This can help support dysphoria relief, as well because it feels like you're shaving a beard, at least until it comes in.

When your moustache and beard do come in from testosterone, if you take it, make sure to oil it lightly with natural oils like argan oil or coconut oil, the stimulates hair growth and follicle health.

And I would recommend shaving just once as it starts developing, so it develops thicker, stronger, and more handsome.

12. If you're planning on going on t, buy at least some of your clothing a size or a few sizes up, or getting a duplicate that's larger.

You will grow, so if you buy all your clothing in a smaller size, you'll probably end up unable to use any of it.

13. Always position your belt buckle in the center of your stomach, the way you can tell if it's positioned right is if it lines up with the buttons of your button up perfectly.

14. When wearing a suit try to always keep the bottomless button unbuttoned. That button isn't actually there to be used, it's meant to be unbuttoned and it makes it look so much better.

The reason it looks so much better is because it makes it flattering and thinning. If you button all the buttons, it will make you look heavy due to it tightening around your waist and stomach.

15. You should always have at least two pairs of dress shoes. one pair that's black, and one pair that's brown. Same with belts. It's also recommended for summer that you keep one pair of masculine flip flops or sandals or sneakers around.

16. This is more of a suggestion than anything, however it's manly as fuck, and people love it.

If you carry a work knife, a pocket watch, a small portable multitool, and a handkerchief.

Possibly even a pen and small notepad with you at all times.

This may seem odd at first, but it's what men used to do constantly in the older days.

These items can come in very useful. A work knife can open packages, open letters, be used in place of scissors occasionally, and even used to defend yourself and others.

A pocket watch is just fancy and shows you're always trying to be on time.

A multi-tool shows you're ready for any task, and it can be a lifesaver in many situations!

Meanwhile a handkerchief is important, because if you ever come across someone crying, or someone wounded, you can lend them or give them your handkerchief, which is a very gentlemanly thing to do, and it can help you pass better, as well as it just being a kind thing to do for someone.

The pen and small notepad is always good to carry on you regardless of any gender, due to you needing to write things down often.

17. Ironically, although socks with sandals seems to be a fashion 'no-no' to most people, I quite like them, and it seems like I pass better with them.

Men tend to wear those slip-on flip flop things, and when you wear socks with it it makes you look very masculine, even if it may look silly to some.

Personally I like it a lot.

18. If you do wish to do makeup & nails, I would suggest doing it as black and gothic as possible, as that's the most common style guys do it as, and if you do it in a certain way, it can come out looking way masculine.

And that concludes my fifth part of this Trans Guy Tips series!

Thank you for reading, and I hope anything I said helped!

[yourmcu]

Body Pillow

 Pairings: Natasha Romanoff x reader

Summary:

Natasha finds you cuddling a body pillow. In your dream, it’s actually her you’re cuddling. It’s Christmas Eve too.

Word count: 1,600

A/n: I’m takin a long time to post but I’ll get em out soon! I hope! thanks for 200 followers btw :))

Warnings: fluff, sleep talking

It’s not a surprise to anyone in the compound when they find you sprawled on your favorite sofa in the lounge. Of course you had a room, but you just love it so much that you’d rather sleep there most of the time. Especially after or before your favorite holidays.

Bidding Sam and Bucky good night as they're the last ones to turn in, you ask Friday to dim the lights and to turn on a Netflix show. If you’re ever wondering why no one stays with you for a movie night or something it’s because you’ve had too many already, and most of the time you don’t mind being alone anyway.

After two or three shows, you finally fall asleep.

Few hours later, Natasha walks across the lounge to get to the kitchen, not all that fazed when she sees a lump shaped like you on the sofa. Though she stops in her tracks when she hears a faint voice coming from your direction.

“Nat,”

She decides that she’s just hearing things, or you probably saw her come in then drifted back to sleep.

When she’s about to return to her room, you speak again.

“Nat,”

She decides to reply this time. “Yeah?”

You don’t respond back immediately. So just in case, she walks up to the sofa to see if something's wrong.

Your hands are wrapped around the side of the body pillow and it's slightly bigger than you. The whole blanket is wrapped around you as well, so Natasha could only imagine how comfortable you are in your sleep.

“You give the best hugs, Nat,” you murmur, still fully asleep, oblivious of the same redhead witnessing it in real life too.

Everyone knows you’ve developed a lil something for Natasha. Does she know? Yes... and no. She refuses to believe you like her that way. If you do, she wants to hear it from you, not from the testosterone of the team.

But seeing you so adorably vulnerable and cute, in a way, it makes her heart flutter.

“I do, huh?” Natasha chuckles from above you and leans down to kiss your hair. “Too bad you’re gonna have to get up soon.”

“Aww, no,” you whine, snuggling closer to the crook of her neck.

Natasha just stands there and tries to process it - you, her teammate and close friend, is dreaming about her. It’s normal, right? Even she has dreamt of the others, including a weird one where Tony and Bruce were riding unicorns-

She flinches when you make a movement, but you just make yourself more comfortable on the pillow, sighing contentedly.

Obviously she’s giving you a good time in your head. Natasha believes she could do better though. If you ever ask her to cuddle, she’d make sure. Am I really jealous of myself right now?

The opening and closing of bedroom doors shake her from her thoughts. She clears her throat and walks back to the kitchen to wait for Wanda so they could make breakfast together. It the day before Christmas, after all, everything has to be special today and the next day.

Wanda enters the kitchen moments later, still a bit groggy from her slumber but she’s in a mood to make a good breakfast. As the pair gets started, they hear a yelp that sounded like yours from the lounge.

“Ow! Tony!”

“Wakey wakey,” Tony teases, defending himself from your playful punches. “For gosh sake, you need to stop having sleepovers by yourself here - you sure you don’t want that sofa in your room?”

You grumble and walk out of the room to get dressed, taking your blanket and body pillow with you.

The lounge and kitchen starts to get occupied by the inhabitants of the compound. One of them being you, out of your pajamas and in a casual Christmas sweater. You greet them with the usual good mornings including Natasha.

“Good morning,” she drawls out. “Sleep well?”

She's curious on how you’d react. But of course you don’t think much of it, you don’t know that she knows what you dreamt about.

“Yeah, it was... nice,” you try to play it cool, avoiding her eyes to pour yourself a glass of eggnog. I mean, look who’s asking. And the fact that she was just about to kiss you in the dream before Tony so rudely interrupted-

“Bet it was,” Natasha smirks after Steve grabs your attention to point out your favorite comic strip on the newspaper, thinking you didn’t hear her.

You chuckle at the Christmas-themed edition of the comic but your gaze returns to Natasha not long after because you did hear her. Maybe she was just being Nat but yeah, the dream was nice. Too nice to be real. You sigh and sip on your drink, getting lost in your own world as Tony loudly rambles about a party to the group.

It was just you and her, so many blankets, watching movies. You don’t know or remember what film specifically, everything was a blur except the way she held you.

As a kid you never got that much affection physically, so every hug from your friends means a lot to you. Well, especially the ones from Natasha.

You couldn’t bring yourself to admit how you feel for her. The men constantly tell you to do it, that it wouldn’t hurt to try, but you’d rather have a close and friendly relationship with Natasha rather than an awkward one just because she didn’t feel the same about you.

The thing is, you don’t know if she shares those kinds of feelings. That’s what Bruce was nagging to you about. ‘You won’t know until you try, until you tell her-

“Y/N, you with us?”

Your hand involuntary twitches as you snap back to the room. “Sorry, yeah. What’s up?”

“Well, instead of a usual party, we’re gonna have a movie night,” Tony says, stealing a piece of food from your plate. “Thoughts?”

You sent him a look but chuckle, “haven’t we already had enough of those?”

“But it’s Christmas!” Tony insists. “And we’re watching Die Hard.”

Steve frowns. “That doesn’t sound like a Christmas movie.”

-----

“Alright Cap, it may not sound like a Christmas movie to you but it’s one of the best.” Sam jokes and plays the movie once all of you have settled.

The theater room is dim and composed of two large sofas, one in front and one just behind it, and a table filled with food. You're one of those who occupied the second sofa behind along with Clint, Wanda, Vision and Natasha. The rest fought for a place up front, which took a while to be honest.

“Hey Nat,” you mutter, eyes not leaving the screen but you do see her from the corner of your eye claim the spot beside you, the one at the edge of the sofa. She gives you a warm smile and makes herself comfortable.

An hour into the movie only the men seated at the front are fascinated by the fighting scenes. Well except for Clint who's seated at the other end, pointing and asking Sam questions about the plot. Wanda and Vision are half asleep leaning on each other, you and Natasha are the only ones calmly watching, probably because you’ve both seen it many times.

You make a sound when Hans Gruber appears on screen again. “Did you know that’s the same guy who played Professor Snape?”

“What?” Natasha chuckles.

“From Harry Potter,” you reply, smiling to yourself. Then you turn to her, “have you watched any of those movies?”

“I’ve heard of it but, no.”

You tilt your head at her, slightly surprised. “You should watch them with me sometime. I prefer the original source material but the films are good on their own.”

You wish you could photograph the way Natasha smiles at you. She’s all smiles today. I wonder why. “I’d love that.”

A loud explosion echoes throughout the room along with yells that sounds like Tony’s and Clint’s, making you yelp and scoot closer to Natasha. She wraps an arm around you instinctively.

“Guys, turn the volume down,” she calls out. Silent chatter fills the room once it turns into a more calmer scene, and Tony told Friday to lower the volume. “You okay?” 

Her arm is still wrapped around you and you want nothing more than to hide yourself in the pillow you’re hugging out of embarrassment. “Yeah... m’good,” you manage to say while holding a yawn. Natasha tugs the blanket more snugly over both of you.

“You can sleep if you want,” she speaks softly. “I think they’re planning on watching all the Die Hard movies until dawn.”

“That’s crazy,” you breathe out. Your eyes are starting to droop and your yawns became frequent. 

You know that cozy feeling when the room’s cold and you have a warm blanket over you? That’s one of your favorite things (the other one being Natasha).

There are only four of you left on the back sofa since Clint moved to the front. At this point your head rests on Natasha’s chest while she plays with your hair, and one of your arms loosely wraps around her waist. You exhale, falling asleep entirely.

Natasha admires how adorable you slept on her. “I hope this is better than your dream,” she murmurs, gently planting a kiss on your forehead and getting drowsy herself.

You snuggle closer to her, as if it was to say, it is.

[facegodandwalkbackwards]

I’ve decided that Renesmee is a trans boy <3

He figures it out in his fifties. Before then, he just figures he’s like his Mom, a little tom-boyish, a little butch. He’s not like other girls, he says. His Mom tells him that’s normal, she was like that, too. And if he feels a longing for the boys in his classes, well, that’s also normal, she says. Wanting someone is the first step to a happily ever after.

Renesmee thinks that sounds trite, but he’s young and doesn’t quite have the exact words to describe why he doesn’t like it. Why ‘happily ever after’ feels confining.

When he reaches his twenties--in real time, and not just in growth--he asks Benjamin about happily ever afters, because he knows his Mom is young, too, by their people’s standards. Benjamin has come to visit every now and then, not for them--he’s not especially attached to them--but because Jacob sometimes drives to Oregon or Idaho to meet up with him and have coffee. He tells Renesmee that they might be possible, but Amun thinks there’s really only ‘happy for now’s. He admits he feels that way, too, sometimes--that he wants to believe happy can be forever, but he knows some day Jacob will stop coming to meet him, and he, too, will die.

During the events of Breaking Dawn, Jacob told Benjamin why the wolves phase, and Benjamin--worried that his presence there might bring more pain--decided that if they were going to be friends, he would never come visit Jacob on his land. Renesmee wishes he could convince his own family to stay away, but ‘the weather’s just too good for us, there,’ he is told. ‘You’ll understand when you’re older. We can blend in with the humans easily there. Besides, we’re never there long enough to do any real damage.’

Except wasn’t he living proof of that being a lie?

His Mother doesn’t see it that way. ‘They weren’t forced to help us,’ she tells him. ‘Jacob, Leah, Seth--they wanted to help. They chose to.’ And he isn’t so sure that’s true, either, but arguing with his Mother never gets him anything productive. Especially when his Father always, always takes her side.

In his thirties, the family--the coven--wants to return to Forks. Renesmee says no, but is overruled by a vote. He goes along at first, but he doesn’t stay. Three nights into their arrival, the aging and grey-haired Taha  Aki--Billy Black, as he’s known, now--comes to visit the house and all but begs them to leave.

Paul and Quil and Embry had just stopped being able to phase, he tells them. If you come back now--are you really going to make them go through this, again?

And Renesmee thinks that maybe his Mother will finally understand. They’re not supposed to be here. But Edward says they won’t stay long enough for it to matter--just three years. That’s all. And when Carlisle and Esme agree, Bella’s convinced.

He doesn’t make a decision right there; he can’t. He’s learned that Alice is too conniving for Renesmee to get past without careful planning.

That night, he leaves. The note, hastily scrawled, tells his family he’s going to live with the Denalis. There are phone calls and tears and accusations. How could he do this to his Mother? Doesn’t he understand how hard it is for them all, living somewhere they aren’t wanted? Doesn’t he understand that he’s still too young to get why he should just come home and ignore Billy? It doesn’t sway him one bit.

Tanya and Carmen try to convince him, themselves. Your family is just worried about you, they say. They just want you to have a good life. Don’t be too hard on them. He knows it costs them nothing to say that.

And he misses them, if he’s honest with himself. Nostalgia is a drug and he wonders and wonders if he made the right choice, but he thinks about the fear in Billy’s face and feels sure.

In those three years, he grows to resent the Denalis. Every conversation that isn’t about why he shouldn’t feel bad for the pack--for the people who killed Laurent (and nevermind that he was hunting on their land, nevermind that he broke the rules, first)--is about how much his family misses him. It’s maddening. Renesmee is mad.

It’s Garrett that gives him an out. You know, he tells Renesmee one cold winter night, days before the Cullens planned to come up north for a decade or so before beginning their standard rotation again, you don’t need a coven. It’s nice to have. They’re helpful if you’re in trouble. But there’s nothing so freeing as going solo, bound to nothing and no-one, going wherever you like as it strikes your fancy. Good way to avoid making decisions, he says, and the little smile tells Renesmee that it’s an invitation. Go, it means. I’ll take the blame for you.

Kate isn’t thrilled when she gets a call from Alice, frantic that Renesmee is gone--just gone, heading west? No--south, now. No--now he’s leapt into a river she doesn’t recognize and she can’t make out what direction he’s going in. Garrett’s been in trouble, before--he knows if he waits a few months, it’ll be fine.

The years on his own are more than Renesmee could ever have hoped for. They’re freeing and wild and beautiful. He hunts in forests and deserts and oceans, and learns how much he can love himself--and still, something feels off. A sour note in the song. Something not quite fitting.

At first, he imagines he’s lonely. He’d always been with his coven, after all, and maybe that’s just what loneliness feels like. Except even in cities, even in the busiest cities in the world, he feels out of step. It’s something deeper.

He grows to resent the name he was given; when he was younger, it had felt weird. Like he was the stand-in for the people whose names he held. Now, he wondered how much truth there may have been in that. When Renee had died, Bella had leaned on him so much, fretting and trying to care for Renesmee as she had once for Renee.

He thinks about being called EJ if he had been a boy, and what that would have meant when Jacob eventually became mortal again. He decides he hates that name, too--but it does feel closer.

Renesmee goes through names like seasons, circling around an answer, reaching ever closer to it and yet feeling so far removed.

It’s in Brazil that he finds it. He’d lost track of seasons and finds himself there in the middle of Pride, and he sees men with breasts. Men with soft faces. Men with scars and furred chests and socks stuffed into their pants. He sees men in the vibrancy of transness and falls in love.

Rio, he decides, is a much better name. Rio feels like home. Rio is learning that he can bind all he wants; his bones don’t bend like a human’s do, and it’s not like he needs to breathe. He experiments with hormones, different dosages, different types, things he’s stolen off supply trucks in the middle of the night. For a long time he thinks they won’t do anything, that he’s too vampiric to use them until one day he wakes up different.

For his best guess, the venom pushes on one side or another of absolutes. Rio thinks he’s built up enough testosterone that the venom corrected overnight. His chest aches and his thighs ache and his chin and throat hurt like he’d been punched hard enough to knock him out.

When he looks in the mirror, what looks back feels right. He’s no taller than he had been, before, but his face--there’s fur, there. A thick beard and mustache and sturdy eyebrows. He’s got fur on his chest where there once were breasts. He’s got straight and narrow hips, and hairy legs, and he cries because his body has never felt so much like home.

If he ever meets the Cullens, again, it’s long after he’s remade himself. There’s a vampire in Georgia, he’s heard, that has the power of granting shields, an echo of the forcefulness with which she protected others in life. He doesn’t need to do much to convince her to place one on him. They’re alike--so similar they could be family. She’s not so human as he is, but she knows what it is to want a different body.

Her shields are different that his Mother’s were. One moment, Alice can see him--the next, he’s gone.

Rio stays in Georgia for a while. It’s lively, there, and he enjoys the company. There’s no spark--no romance--just a desire for kinship. When Berta chooses to leave, he follows her. It’s not a coven; they’re not bound to each other. They split apart sometimes, come together again decades or centuries past. And Rio stays away from Forks.

And he is happy for now.

[geminisholland]

heyy hunny, how are you?? If you’re still taking requests, maybe like reader, tom and paddy bonding time? like them taking paddy out for hot chocolate/coffee, and just strolling around the city ... maybe the two of them helping paddy with girl problems and all. just fluff and bantery in general hehe :)) thanks!

a/n: ugh nothing hits better than some good ol’ fluff.. thank you for your patience <3 you are so appreciated!!

warnings: fluff 

word count: 1521

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Staying with Tom’s family was always an adventure, the amount of testosterone in the house was a testament to that. You loved going to London to be with his family, though. They were all truly amazing people that you loved being around, and they loved you as well. They put your comfort as their highest priority, making sure you knew that this was your home as well.

“So, what’s on the schedule today?” You asked while walking towards Tom. The two of you stood in front of his bed, your eyes locking with one another. You moved your hands to his chest, leaning against him as you kissed him.

“Mmm,” He hummed during the kiss. You pulled away to look at him again, a smile creeping on his face. “I was thinking we could just walk around the city, maybe be tourists for the day?”

“Tourists?” You questioned. “You would do that for me?”

You smiled as he pulled you closer to him, his hands on your waist. You interlocked your hands around the back of his neck, the two of you interlaced together.

“I would do anything for you, darling,” Tom responded, eliciting a smile from you. He kissed you once more, then broke away to start getting ready.

The gloomy weather in London tends to bring down the mood of others, as they do desperately craved the sunshine. You, on the other hand, were drawn to the gloomy days. You loved everything about them, the way they made you feel. How the weather brought people together, more specifically how the weather brought Tom closer to you. He loved to snuggle, the two of you would be walking down the street, and he’d open his jacket and wrap it around you. He made sure you were always warm, but most importantly, warm from him.

When the two of you made your way downstairs, you were welcomed by every member of Tom’s family, and you flashed all of them a smile. One thing about the Holland’s, was that they were always there. You didn’t mind, really, but this meant no alone time with Tom. Today, you were getting that alone time- just the two of you, being tourists in London.

You were discussing your plans with everyone, barely noticing that Paddy had snuck away from the conversation, going upstairs to talk to Tom. You were deep in conversation with Harry about how to properly pronounce words when Tom tried to pull you aside.

“Y/N,” Tom whispered in your ear, making you turn around to face him. “I need to talk to you, let’s go in the hallway.”

You nodded, your face was filled with concern as he took your hand into his own, pulling you away. Paddy stood in the hallway, looking back between both you and Tom.

“What’s going on?” You asked, looking between the two of them.

“Tom promised me hot chocolate,” Paddy stated.

You raised an eyebrow, “What?”

“Okay, a little back story, Paddy,” Tom shot back. You were looking at them with an extremely confused expression. Paddy and Tom kept looking at each other, giving you no explanation.

You started to laugh, “What is going on?”

“Paddy is coming with us, we’re getting hot chocolate, and listening to his problems,” Tom explained. You started to laugh, you could tell that Tom and Paddy had been bickering before they came to this conclusion, and it was quite amusing.

“Okay,” You responded. “I’m excited! Who’s excited?”

You looked between Tom and Paddy, then chuckled to yourself. You shook your head at them, then walked away.

“I’ll be waiting in the car!” You called out.

Tom drove into the city, talking about a new project he has coming up. You and Paddy talked about the best places to get hot chocolate, and never missed an opportunity to make fun of Tom.

“My agent thinks this movie is going to be really big,” Tom explained, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Anything you’re in is big,” You responded, flashing a smile to him.

“That’s what she said,” Paddy whispered.

You shook your head, a small chuckle escaping your lips.

“That’s not how that saying works, Paddy,” Tom responded, shaking his head. Paddy couldn’t see it, but a smile formed on Tom’s face.

The three of you eventually made it to the cafe with the best hot chocolate, according to Paddy. After you ordered your drinks, the three of you started walking the streets of London.

“So,” You started, turning to look at Paddy. “Can I ask why Tom promised you hot chocolate?”

“It’s nothing,” He dismissed. You looked up at Tom, and he just shook his head.

“Girl problems,” Tom admitted.

You placed your hand over your heart, as you gave a soft chuckle.

“Aw, Paddy,” You began.

“I don’t want to make a big deal out of it,” Paddy responded. He huffed out, then took a sip of his drink.

Tom placed his hand around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You also wrapped your hand around his waist, the two of you walking together.

“Well, I’m a girl,” You joked. “I might be able to help!”

“I don’t know,” Paddy started. “I’m embarrassed.”

“What?” You stared at him. “Why?”

“Don’t be embarrassed, mate,” Tom responded. “We’re here to help you.”

“You have to promise you won’t make fun of me,” Paddy said.

You and Tom looked at each other before looking back at him.

“Of course we won’t!” You said.

“I was more talking to Tom,” Paddy joked, a smile forming as he looked up at Tom.

“Piss off,” Tom said. “I would never make fun of you,” he paused. “For that.”

“Tom!” You exclaimed, playfully hitting his chest with your hand. He flashed you a smile, then placed a kiss on your forehead.

“It’s just that,” Paddy started. “Well, there’s this one girl that I really like, and I want to ask her out, but I don’t know how she feels about me.”

“Do the two of you even talk?” Tom asked, half-kidding.

“We talk every day! After school, she facetimes me!”

You looked at Paddy, your mouth wide open. “What are you waiting for, it’s obvious she likes you!”

Paddy shook his head, “What makes you say that?”

“Umm, mate, if she calls you every day it’s pretty obvious,” Tom explained. “Y/N used to text me every day, and that’s how I knew she liked me.”

“Yeah,” You started, looking up at Tom. “And you called me every time you saw my text. We would talk for hours.”

You leaned onto his shoulder as the three of you kept walking, giving Paddy endless advice. The drive back to the house consisted of you and Tom hyping Paddy up, creating a game plan on how he was going to ask the girl out. He was incredibly grateful for the advice, and was extremely excited about his plan. In fact, when you got back to the house, he immediately ran out of the car to start planning. You and Tom looked at each other, and started laughing.

“Oh to be young again,” You whispered. You sat in the car, your body facing Tom’s.

“You talk as if we’re old,” He responded. He placed his hand on your cheek, moving a stray hair away.

“It sure feels that way,” You joked, laughing into his hand.

“Paddy has that effect on people,” Tom chuckled. The two of you sat in the car, not ready to face the entirety of Tom’s family right now.

The grey clouds that hung above you turned angry, water hitting the windshield of the car as you and Tom talked. You smiled, you loved this weather.

“Should we make out in the car?” Tom asked. Your eyes grew big, you couldn’t hold back your laughter.

“What?” He cried out. “Don’t you want to feel like a teenager again?”

“Oh,” You whispered. “I absolutely do.”

With that, you climbed into the backseat of the car with Tom, laying down in the leather seats. The rain splattered outside, the warmth of your bodies causing the windows to fog up. Tom placed his lips on yours, your hands tangled in his hair as he towered over you. He moved his lips down your neck, leaving a trail of warmth along your body.

“I love you,” You breathed out. Tom stopped kissing you to look at you. He was breathing heavy, the curls of his hair covered his forehead.

“You what?” He whispered. His cheeks were growing red.

“I love you, Tom,” You said. His silence was making you anxious, your breaths started to become heavy.

Then, he let out a sigh of relief.

“I have always loved you, y/n, the minute we met I knew,” He started. “I was waiting for the right time to tell you, but I was nervous that it would be too soon, and I jus-“

You brought your lips onto his, interrupting his rambling. You pulled away for a second, looking at his face as you held it in your hands.

“For the record,” You breathed out. “I felt the same way.”

hiiii!!! if you see this, how would you feel about me including the last fic i read in my own posts, so like a recommendation kinda? i think it would be a unique way to promote amazing writers, let me know what you think! send me either yes or no, my inbox is open!! thank you!!

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@white-wolf1940 @holyfrickfracks @stylessugarhigh @lilhoodhippie @lowkey-holland @lmaotshollandd @thehumanistsdiary @tomshufflepuff @zspideyy @lovely-blackinnon @hollandfanficlove @minejungwoo @th45 @stylessugarhigh @holyfrickfracks

[mmvalentine]

Fifty-Six part 2 | Feysand

Smut-fest continues, if you're enjoying this go say happy birthday to @asteria-of-mars!

Part 1 Part 3

Chapter 2: Chafing a bit?

Rhys was right about one thing- the inner circle were already seated and half way through their breakfast when they got downstairs. At the couple’s arrival, everyone looked up and greeted them warmly. They took their usual seats opposite each other, and Rhys caught Feyre’s ankles between his under the table and winked at her.

Feyre settled in between Cassian and Mor, but when the former leaned his elbow on the table and looked at her with a goofy grin, Rhys’s lips thinned.

Alright there? she asked him.

Fine, was the terse and completely unconvincing reply.

You sure you’re ready to be around other people?

Yeah, he said. I’m fine.

“So,” Cassian said, his eyes sparkling. “Mates, huh?”

Feyre rolled her eyes. “Okay, I know all of you guys knew before I did.”

“We’re sorry,” Mor blurted. “We never meant to deceive you.”

Feyre softened. “I know,” she said. “It’s okay.” Mor grinned, and heaped muffins onto Feyre’s plate.

“Welcome to the family,” she said, and it was the best thing Feyre had ever heard.

“Congratulations, both of you,” Azriel chimed in, offering her a rare smile. Feyre beamed at him.

“We’re glad to have you,” Amren said quietly, and from her, it meant the world.

The whole time, Rhys kept his eyes on Feyre, and sipped his coffee.

“We missed you guys,” Feyre said affectionately.

“Oh you did not,” Mor smiled.

But Cassian said, “Especially me, right Feyre?” and Rhys snarled.

Everyone at the table stilled, and looked at the High Lord.

“Rhys,” Feyre said. “It’s okay.” Rhys locked eyes with her for a moment, and finally nodded once. Their friends continued eating, but kept flicking wary glances in his direction. Azriel cleared his throat.

“So, since you’re back Rhys, I was hoping to have a moment to discuss Jurian’s movements. My spies in the human realm have been keeping tabs on the human queens and-”

Azriel’s attempt at distraction was interrupted by another snarl, ripping from Rhys’s throat.

“What now?” Cassian hissed at him, dropping his roll to his plate.

“Would you mind keeping your great big ape-arms to yourself?” Rhys spat back at him.

“What are you talking about?”

“Every time you move, you’re in Feyre’s space.”

“Rhys,” Feyre warned. “He’s fine.” It’s just the bond, love, she said in his mind. You’re not jealous of your brothers, remember?

Rhys did not reply. Just stared Cassian down until he shuffled further away from Feyre. Which was not very far, since the table was only so long and he was hitting the outside leg already.

“Uh, so… the human realm…” Azriel tried again.

“What about it?” Rhys asked irritably. Mor shifted in her seat. Feyre wasn’t sure whether to try to soothe or reprimand Rhys, but as Azriel talked he did seem to calm down a little. Even made a few comments on his spymaster’s plans going forward, and Feyre relaxed enough that when Cassian asked her to pass the eggs, she didn’t think too much of it. But then when Cassian took the plate from her, their fingers brushed, and in the next second Rhys was exploding across the table.

Glasses spilled and fruit rolled, and the everyone jumped back as Rhys lunged with clawed fingers and feral eyes. Amren grabbed a hold of Mor and said “Right girlie, that’s our cue to leave.” Mor shot a sympathetic glance at Feyre, then they winnowed. Az took a step forward as if he might get in between his brothers, but then thought better of it and left, too. Cassian, his nose bloodied and with egg splattered over his chest, shoved Rhys off of him with a great heave.

“Alright, alright I’m going. You big bloody baby,” he said, and then stalked out the door.

“Rhys,” Feyre began, and his head whipped round to her, teeth still bared. She held her hands up. “Rhys please calm down,” she said.

“Like hell I will,” Rhys growled, and then he lifted her by the waist and set her on the table, pushing her back among the ruined plates and stray danishes. Feyre thought to protest, but there was still testosterone rolling of Rhys in waves, and although her brain did not exactly approve of what had just happened, her body was fast taking over and by the time his lips crashed against hers, she was wrapping her legs around him and clothes were torn from their bodies in shreds.

Rhys sent apologies round after the breakfast debacle, but also stubbornly refused to admit that the mating bond was getting the better of him.

“It was just too many people at once,” he said to Feyre, after she she had taken him back to their room to wash the jam off his chest. He was sitting on the edge of the bathtub, while she wiped at him with a washcloth.

“It was too soon,” Feyre argued, looking him over for missed debris.

“Maybe I’ll just have them round one at a time, for now,” Rhys went on. Feyre sighed, and rinsed out the cloth. “Okay your turn,” he said, pulling her down and switching places with her. Feyre handed him the little towel, but Rhys, surveying the mix of breakfast smears and lovebites decorating her torso, decided there were better ways of cleaning her up. He licked her from navel to chin, and there was no further discussion about visitors that day.

But the next day, Feyre answered the door to Azriel while Rhys was in the bath. She was surprised to see him, and Azriel, for his part, actually looked nervous. Feyre wasn’t sure she’d ever seen him nervous.

“High Lady,” the Shadowsinger greeted her, ducking his head.

“Azriel,” she said warmly, and grasped his hand in hers. Azriel’s eyes widened, and peered through the doorway behind her. Feyre laughed.

“Don’t worry, he’s upstairs,” Feyre said. Azriel smiled.

“One can never be too careful with new mating bonds,” he said. “And Rhys… well, Rhys has taken my head off for less. Granted, that was a long time ago, but I’m assuming he’s basically a hormone-addled eighteen-year-old again.”

“That’s probably a safe assumption,” Feyre agreed, and showed him in. "Rhys is expecting you?"

“Yes, he asked me to come. I’ll, ah, wait in the study,” Azriel said, and disappeared round the corner. Feyre headed back up the stairs, where Rhys was walking out of their room towelling his hair off. Still naked and steaming from the bath. Feyre’s eyes followed the contours of his abs.

“See something you like, Feyre darling?” Rhys grinned, disappearing the towel with magic.

“Ah…” Feyre stuttered, forgetting what she was supposed to tell him. Gods, he really was a beautiful male. Rhys’s smile turned feline as he stalked toward her. Feyre stepped back as he approached, still watching the muscles shift under his tattoos. He walked her back out to the landing, and leaned her against the bannister as he bent to circle his arms around her waist.

“Cat got your tongue?” he whispered. He was so incredibly warm around her, and Feyre let her head fall back as he kissed under her ear. She struggled to remember what she came to get Rhys for.

“Oh!” she put her hands on his biceps. “Azriel…”

Rhys’s head snapped up, and his eyes were ablaze.

“Azriel?” he demanded. Before she could explain, Rhys had spun her around so fast her hands caught the bannister as she fell forward. He yanked her hips back and threw the edge of her skirt up. “I don’t want to hear another male’s name on your lips, not now and not ever,” he growled in her ear. And then he smacked her lightly across the ass. “Okay?”

Feyre was going to laugh it off and explain, but then something unfurled in her chest. “Do that again,” she breathed.

“What?” Rhys asked, dangerously low. “This?” He smacked her again, a little harder this time. Feyre’s eyes went wide, and to her surprise, heat gathered between her legs. Rhys saw it all, and a very slow, very wicked grin spread across his face.

“Do you like to be spanked, my love?” he asked. Feyre didn’t know how to answer. Rhys pushed her underwear up to expose her backside, and smoothed his hand over it. And then landed a tight slap on her bare skin.

“Oh,” Feyre gasped, arching her back. Rhys pulled her hips back further, rubbing his now hard cock against her from behind. Feyre gripped the railing more tightly, and completely forgot about the spymaster in the study. “More,” she breathed.

“You want more?” Rhys echoed. He spanked her again, and she moaned. “Is this what you were looking for?” He pushed the rest of her skirt up her back and smacked the other side of her ass. “Is this why you’re being so cruel to me,” spank, “coming to me with another male’s name in your mouth,” spank, “looking for punishment?” He yanked her underwear down so it dropped around her ankles, and landed another three slaps, each harder than the one before. Feyre cried out again and again, and was getting so wet she knew he could smell her.

“Spread your legs, darling,” he instructed her. Feyre stepped out of her underwear and leaned her forearms against the bannister. Rhys spanked her again without warning and her eyes watered.

"Oh!"

“Wider,” he snarled. Feyre obeyed, widening her stance. Rhys rubbed his hands gently over her stinging skin, and then his cock was nudging at her entrance.

“Good girl,” he crooned, and then he spanked her one more time and when she yelled out he threaded his fingers through her hair and plunged inside her.

Rhys fucked her hard, bent over the railing, tugging her head back by the hair while his free hand worked her clit. The now sensitive and reddened skin of her ass bounced against the tops of his thighs, and when her knees started to buckle Rhys let go of her hair to wrap an arm around her waist to hold her up. Every physical sensation seemed heightened unbearably, and Feyre screamed as she came.

“Who’s name, Feyre?” he asked her. “Who’s name belongs in your mouth?”

“Yours,” she gasped between spasms.

“Say it,” Rhys bit out.

“Rhys,” Feyre said. “Rhys, Rhys, oh fuck, Rhys,” and the last one drawn out in a moan. The sound of it had Rhys coming hard as she was, and she didn’t come down until he had emptied himself inside her and his forehead was damp on her back. Feyre tried to move but felt like a new foal. Rhys laughed softly and carried her back to their room in his arms.

He lay her down very gently, and pulled the blanket over her before softly stroking her hair.

“I didn’t know that about you,” he said quietly.

“What?” Feyre asked, luxuriating in his wandering touch. A laughing edge came into his voice.

“That you were such a glutton for punishment.”

Feyre blushed, and Rhys pressed his lips to her forehead. “Don’t worry,” he whispered. “Half the fun of being wicked is getting to take care of you afterward.” Feyre smiled.

“I like the sound of that,” she said.

“And I quite like teaching you not to talk about other males in front of me.”

Feyre’s eyes flew open. “Oh!” she said, sitting up. “I was supposed to tell you that Azriel is here and waiting for you in the study!”

They stared at each other for a second, and the burst out laughing. Feyre covered her face in her hands, suddenly remembering the wanton sounds she had been making minutes ago and how clearly Azriel must have heard them all. Rhys peppered kisses over her cheek, and jaw, and neck, and then rolled out of bed, pulling trousers on before going downstairs to see if the Shadowsinger had stuck around.

He had not.

****

Liz asked for spanking ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

MASTERLIST

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[idesofrevolution]

Here y’all go. Hope you like it.

Look at him, isn’t he adorable? I’d been watching him and his college friends playing ball every Saturday from my balcony. Each time, I’m hearing him talk about “slamming pussy” and “playin’ the game” as if he knows what that means. Jock boys always think the world of themselves, and sometimes for good reason. Every now and again, I look back on my own days at that age, fondly remembering all the bullshit trouble got myself into. I’m telling you- once you hit a certain age, you just want to relive those debaucherous days again; and hearing this little shit wasting those years degrading the ladies... I knew I could do so much better with his assets.

So into my mind popped a little idea. We’re living in a world of infinite possibilities, and using a few tricks and a whole lot of ingenuity you can really access some more unattainable goals. For instance, knowing the local voodoo priestess can be an invaluable advantage. Miss Marie had lived across the hall for as long as anyone could remember, and she had the respect and fear of everyone she met. So for a few hundred dollars and debt or two to her, she gave me a little gris gris which she insinuated could help little old me up my game. 

With bag in hand, I had to make my move. That Saturday I watched with bated breath as the boys were shooting hoops and talking shit until the sun went down. When the streetlamps went on, one by one they departed and left the ladykiller waiting on his Uber. As he sat there flipping through Tinder on his phone, I whispered the incantation that Miss Marie had taught me. Three times I repeated it, never once breaking my gaze on him. Upon the fourth recitation, I saw him suddenly throw his phone on the ground in rage. He tossed the basketball across the street and started to pace back and forth. Calling down to him, I “checked in on him.”

“Hey! You alright?” He looked up to my balcony and grimaced. 

“Shut the fuck up ya fruity bitch! Phone’s dead that’s all! Mind your business!” I chuckled and leaned against the railing, watching my hateful prey unknowingly within my clutches. Thinking his Uber was on it’s way, he sat down on the curb and pouted to himself. Five minutes turned to forty minutes and with his ride nowhere in sight, he played right into my hand. “Ay! Fag! Got a charger or somethin?” A smirk crawled across my face and I waved him over to my building and buzzed him up.

Now truth be told, I had no idea what to expect. Marie didn’t exactly explain how the gris gris would work, nor did she break down how to initiate the plan. So when he knocked on my door, I’d be lying if I said I was entirely understanding of what I was doing. I swung the heavy old door open and there he stood. Glistening with sweat and a scowl on his pretty boy face with his beat up skateboard in tow. 

“So where’s the charger?” He looked me up and down, disapprovingly looking at my big belly and old biker tattoo sleeves. Back in the day, I rode with my crew from coast to coast, fuckin’ every stud, twink, and bear that came my way. But the years hadn’t been too kind to me, and from the look on his face he sure didn’t see me the way that those boys back then did. Convincing myself to swallow my pride, I tossed him an iPhone charger and pointed him to the living room outlet. Plugging it in, he plopped down on my couch, and completely ignored my existence. Muttering under his breath, I could tell his Uber had cancelled.

“You can stay here until your car gets here.” I leaned against the hallway arch, taking in his steaming muscles. He clearly worked out in addition to all the days and hours of basketball. And damn... did he smell like hours of and hours of basketball. It was my favorite scent- raw testosterone, absolute masculinity, untempered musk; and his was STRONG.

“Bet your ass I’m getting the fuck out of your creepin’ ass house when this car gets here.” He thought he was so hood, so badass. He had no clue. Soon, though, he’d learn how to be a real man. Soon he’d be more than just a basic pretty boy frat kid. He started coughing gently, trying to hide it behind his phone screen, but the coughs grew louder and heavier. “Yo, get me some water!” I smiled.

“Get it yourself, bitch.” He whipped his head in my direction and tried to jump up, but realized he could barely move. It was as if he had no breath. “Oh, you’re feelin weak, huh? Why don’t you call your friends and they can come pick you up.” He tried to reach for his phone, but his arm had all but given out. Panic set in behind his cruel, mean spirited eyes and for the first time I saw him for who he really was behind the muscles, good lucks, and put on swagger: a little homophobic bitch who was in over his head. I walked over to him and plopped down on the couch next to him. His smell was strong and virile, full of youthful pheromones that he knew were a gift straight from God. I tested the waters and lifted his limp arm, exposing his wet pits. Assaulted, I tell you, I was assaulted by the sharp fragrance that poured from the hairy confines. He could do no more than a whiny whimper as I buried my nose and tongue into his armpit. 

“Well, fuck, kid. It’s been a fuckin’ bitch knowing you. But it’s gonna be one hell of a good time bein’ you.” I saw the last of his pathetic consciousness fade away. Where it went I neither knew nor cared; all that was left was his empty, hollow husk. Curious, I brought my fingers to his plump lips and pried. A sound I can only describe as stretching elastic rang through the room as I pulled and pulled. Looking inside, he was hollow, albeit padded with slick flesh that outlined his impressive musculature. Letting go, his face snapped back to normal. He was ready.

I eagerly stripped, thinking of all the adventures I could relive from within him; thinking of the numerous opportunities that I could snatch with his glorious body and my confident mind. Laying him down, I stuck my toe into his mouth and pushed. After a few thrusts downward, my foot slid down his throat. It took a solid minute for me to weasel my second foot into the tight confines of his slimy mouth and down his throat, but they were soon both slipping down his torso, through his muscled legs and landing in his tight feet. I was several sizes larger than he, so his tiny size 7s felt like a pair of tiny, wet rubber socks to my size 13s. Yet, after a little adjusting, they looked amazing at my size. I brought one to my face, pressing the damp soles on my nose, taking in the salty, rank funk that emanated from between his toes. I stood up, his mouth around my ankles making my a little wobbly. I grabbed his waist and pulled up, watching his legs slip over mine. The sheer size of my pudgy calves and thighs seemed to be suctioned into his, adding my mass to his musculature. He would be so much better at my 6′2 than his 5′9.

After a hefty tug, my bloated ass was sucked into his, tightening and firming into an ass any stud would kill to plow, and anyone would kill to plunge their tongue into. Sauntering over to my mirror, I saw a toned, gorgeous lower half, with my tubby top pouring over our waist. My cock was pressed tightly against my groin, since I’d forgotten to slip it into his when my ass was... compacted. I stuck my meaty hands beneath our skin and tried to grab my shaft, leading it towards his. The kid wasn’t packin’ anything impressive. I guess his ladies didn’t have high standards for dick. But I’ll tell you when my thick rod was slurped into his, it was like I was thrusting inside the tightest fleshjack I’ve ever used. Looking down, I smiled at a girthy, 10 inch, uncut fuckstick. I swiped my finger underneath my new foreskin and took a deep sniff. Fuck. Yes. It was unreal. The cocksmell was so strong yet so addictive, it was as if it was dripping manliness in odorous form. 

I knew that there was building pressure from within, and that the midsection would be the hardest thrust. So, I readied myself. Getting my footing underneath, I took a deep breath and held it in. With as much strength as I could muster, I tugged upward and my bulging belly was gulped into his skin with a loud “shlorp.” This took my body a moment to adjust, with a hefty beer gut protruding from my stomach, but after a deep belch, a set of washboard abs was there before me. To my surprise, and glee, some of my tattoos had transferred to my new skin, which gave me hope for the sleeves I’d grown to love.

Speaking of which, it was time for me to thrust my arms into his, which seemed entirely easier than my stomach. I slipped on his arms like gloves, the sensation of touch returning to my fingertips as they slipped into his. Looking at the mirror, it seemed only a fraction of my sleeve transferred over. Oh well, better than nothing! His shoulders snapped over mine, and I stood there in all my nude glory- with his jaw around my throat. I was ready. I was so ready to begin anew. I grabbed the jaw, matching his bottom lip to mine, and pulled his face over mine like a silicone mask. It suctioned to my head and within seconds I opened my eyes to a new man. 

I was incredible. My face was an amalgamation of both our likenesses, the best of both worlds. I winked at my new self, testing out my old cocky smoulder. I still got it, and hell, I would be using it a whole fuckin’ lot. A knock on the door woke me from my eyefucking and walked over to the door. Opening it, there stood Marie. She looked me up and down and rolled her eyes.

“Well, well, well. Look who’s a bonafide stud once again.” I smirked, and let her in. “Phew... Boy you’re fragrant. But then again, I’m sure the boys you fuck are into that sort of thing huh?” Smiling, I lifted my arms, and took in my scent. Better than poppers. “Now, let’s get down to business, shall we? You agreed to the terms, now it’s time to pay up.” I plopped down on the couch, preparing to hear the terms of my debt.

“What you need, baby?” She grabbed me by the cheeks, looking her straight in the eye. All color must’ve flooded from my face.

“Your big blue eyes aren’t gonna get you anywhere with me, son. You are to do as I say, do you hear me?” I nodded silently. “I need followers, boy. Followers. Those who are willing to do what I need done, and in exchange... I’ll add them to your little crew. When I tell you to get something done, I need it done, you hear me?” I nod. “Now when I say go get some more boys, ma cher, you understand what I’m saying, yeah?” I smile as she lets go of my cheeks. “Enjoy your immortality, baby. I’ll be in touch.” With that, she tosses me some clothes as she walks out my door.

It’s been three weeks since that day, and the old man in the flat is nowhere to be seen. His ‘son’ Sebastian has since taken over the lease, and become something of a staple in the community. Always makin the ladies swoon, and the guys drip. Always there to end a fight with a swift K.O. to the chin. Always happy to help a down-on-their-luck neighbor. But most importantly, always looking for new people call ‘family.’

WELP. Introducing a potentially new recurring character: Sebastian the Voodoo King. Let me know what you think of him through asks, and what you’d like to see him to HERE. Have a dope day, kids. Hope this is everything y’all wanted.

[crescentsteel]

Keeping a Secret - Part 6

pairing: Tsukishima x f!manager of Sendai Frogs genre: sexual tension/crack/fluff/slow burn wc: 7.1k

Part 5 || Part 7 || masterlist

[a/n]

I’m sorry for the slow update (As you know, I finished my other mini series last week and I was just a ball of exhaustion, until now tbh)

I think we’re halfway along the story now. I think. Lmao. 

AO3 link is on the masterlist’s page.

Let me know if you want to be part of the taglist uwu

No one budges - not Tsukishima, not the team, not even you. You scram the insides of your brain, trying your absolute hardest to come up with a panic-stricken solution on how to remedy the carelessness brought by your surge of pride from winning.

You can feel your heart pounding on your chest. Or maybe it's Tsukishima’s against yours. You can’t tell at this point and you don’t bother trying to. You push your cognitive skills to its maximum as you strive to think for a fix for your current predicament.

Luckily, you’re not a university scholar for nothing.

You release Tsukishima and open your arms wide to the next person you lay your eyes on.

“Kyou-kun! Good job,” you manifest the joy on your face as you come up to Kyoutani for the similar hug you just gave Tsukishima.

Like Tsukishima, Kyoutani also stills when you embrace his perspiring body. Kyoutani is not a touchy person, but unlike Tsukishima, you know he’s fond of you. So he doesn’t push you away. Rather, he awkwardly pats you at the back.

“T-thanks,” he says with his low, raspy voice. You beam at him and move on to the next player until you’ve hugged all six on the court.

When you come back to the benches, there’s an organized line of the rest of the Sendai Frogs.

You blink quizzically for a few seconds, wondering why, until you realize that they’re waiting for their turn as well.

“Aww, you guys!” you gush dotingly at how adorable they are. Yet, you can’t indulge them.

“Maybe next time? You need to line up already,” you remind them. They all groan downcastedly, but Coach Mira castigates them immediately.

“What the hell are you all sighing for? You won. Stop dawdling around and fall in line over there, not here!”

The guys snap out of it and do as they’re told. Before Coach Mira joins them, she shoots up an eyebrow at you, probably looking for an explanation for your behavior.

“Sorry, Coach.” You chuckle as you apologize for getting the team a bit sidetracked, but provide no reason why you did so. “Won’t do it again,” you supplement the apology.

She lets it go casually and lines up with the team as well.

Once the match is officially done, you head over to the restroom. You enter one of the cubicles quickly and lock its door, you knock your head on it.

‘What is wrong with you, you dumb bitch!’ you lambaste yourself while staring at tiles with petrified eyes as you replay the scene again.

When you made the deal with Tsukishima, you were confident that there wouldn’t be problems with hiding what you two have. He is one of your athletes first and foremost; that hasn’t slipped out of your mind. Yet for one moment there, you blurred the line that you and Tsukishima had established.

You got cozy with him when you’re not in private--when you’re not supposed to. It was just a hug, but still, it was something when you’ve made the whole Sendai gymnasium your audience.

You’re the one who even assured Tsukishima that no one will know about your set-up. Tough luck, you’re also the first one to mess up.

You bang your head on the cubicle door again. The sound of your frustrated groan echoes through the whole bathroom. After a while, you take a deep breath and unlock the cubicle. You go back out to the halls.

When you turn left to head for the bus, you’re startled at the presence of the blonde that was just in your mind. Tsukishima is there, leaning against the wall next to the door you emerged from.

“Fuck! You scared me,” you exclaim.

“Tell me about it,” he replies with a straight face. Despite the nonchalance, you know there’s meaning behind his short retort.

You scan the area, looking for any other member of the team who might be present. When you see none, you drag Tsukishima outside to a secluded area at the side of the gym. Once there, you check around again just to be sure no one will pass by.

Tsukishima just watches you acting in distress, waiting for whatever it is you’re going to say. Obviously it’s important enough to you that you tugged him all the way here. Once you’re done confirming that the coast is clear, panic sets in your face.

You clutch his jacket and start lamenting. “I’m so stupid, Tsukki! Oh God. They’re gonna find us out. We’re screwed!”

He thought that you were just going to explain and apologize for your slip-up earlier. He was stupefied when you did it. He’d probably be giving you an earful right now had you not resolved your mishap before it became an object of inquiry to the others. Admittedly, he was still planning to scold you a bit. However, seeing you this freaked out about it makes him change his mind..

“I’m so sorry!” you go on as you drive yourself deeper to hysteria.

He can’t understand why you’re having this kind of reaction. You solved the problem. You hugged five huge, sweaty men to make up for it. That was a convincing distraction for testosterone-filled players who just won a match.

“Can you calm down? I do-”

“Maybe we should stop it already,” you suggest strongly, cutting him off as perturbation clearly clouds your judgement.

This throws him off. The idea didn’t cross his mind at all. He was just going to reprehend you to be mindful, not call off the agreement you two made.

He doesn’t mind it anymore - kissing you. Sometimes, they’re more enjoyable than he initially anticipated them to be. Most importantly, they’re harmless. They’re just meaningless kisses born out of what little attraction you two have for each other. No one is getting out of line. You don’t go beyond kissing. You both act like the deal doesn’t exist unless it’s just the two of you in your room.

That’s why he is willing to let your mistake go, apart from the fact that you were successful in covering it up.

But instead of contesting your suggestion, he says, “If you say so.”

Even though he’s accepted that kisses from you are allowable, if you want to back out from it, why the hell should he stop you?

“Right??” you persistently convince him even though he basically said yes already.

“Right,” he presses on as well to satisfy your apparent need for him to agree with you.

His answer effectively calms you down as you let go of his jacket and sigh a breath of relief. You swiftly regain composure and face him with your trademark sassiness. “Awesome,” you say with a reassured smile.

“You go ahead first so Coach won’t ask me to chew your ass for taking too long to get on the bus.”

“And you?”

“I’m the manager. I’m always the last to get on the freaking bus.”

He turns around and walks back to the bus. That’s strange. He thought you love taking advantage of every opportunity there is for you to pick on him. He might be wrong.

He can be sure about one thing though: you really are the manager who looks out for everyone, including him.

Maybe that’s why it bothers you so much. Above all else, you are their manager. So when you acted upon something other than such in the court, you lost your cool.

Oh well.

It’s not as if scrapping the deal off is a loss of any kind. He’s gained some sort of fun from it. That’s that. Nothing more. Nothing less.

--

Tsukishima knocks for the second time. He wouldn’t have bothered knocking since it’s your scheduled time to meet today, but he also doesn’t want to barge in without your permission. So he knocks again.

Sure enough, it opens this time. Yet, no one’s there to meet him.

“Tsukishima...”

His eyes drop further down to where your voice came from. You’re on your knees, your head faced down on the floor, and your arm reaching on the doorknob where your hand is latched onto.

What is it this time? What kind of antic will you throw his way? He waits for you to do something unearthly again, readying himself for anything you might surprise him with.

But nothing. You just stay where you are while he stands still.

You groan weakly and ask, “Did you not get my text?”

He slouches down and gets on your level, still not discarding the thought that you have a trick up your sleeve, and you’re waiting to spring it on him.

“What text?” He didn’t check his phone on the way here so he doesn’t know.

You lift your chin to face him while he anticipates your big reveal -- your comedic idea of the day -- but it doesn’t come. What greets him are your squinted eyes, almost beet red cheeks, and pale lips.

“Not today,” you struggle to say which comes out raspy and frail.

He instantly reaches for your forehead to confirm his speculation. His eyes widen with worry when his palm touches your skin. Even without a thermometer, he can confidently conclude that you’re sick. Not just sick, you’re burning with fever.

He looks behind you and sees your laptop open with a mug filled with brown streaks of fried liquid he can only assume to be coffee.

“Jesus Christ,” he hisses. You really won’t fucking stop at nothing even if you’re literally sick already.

He peels your hand off from the doorknob. He scoops your legs and waist with ease and stands up.

“H-Hey,” you protest. You’re gravely debilitated so you do not move at all aside from a hand feebly clutching his shirt for support. He kicks the door close and walks over to your bed.

“Do you have a fucking death wish, y/n?”

Even with his harsh tone, he’s extra careful to duck down from your top bunk because he’s too big for the damn thing. If he’s not mindful, he’ll surely bump his bed on the metal frame.

He delicately lies you down on your bed as he manages to sit beside you without hurting himself.

Your eyes are closed and your whole face screams of discomfort. Your mouth opens as you scuffle the words to come out.

“Go home. You’ll get...sick too. Game soon,” you whisper hoarsely.

As usual, you’re still thinking about the team. Is it always everything else before yourself? Don’t you really know how to take a fucking break? It’s an eyesore. Watching you slowly but surely deteriorate yourself is more taxing than handling your childish nonsense.

He’d love to give you an earful of his thoughts about your pressing behavior, but it’s not what you need to hear at the moment. “Who should I call to be here?” he asks instead.

You force your eyelids to open and look at him. “No one. I can take care of…,” you trail off as your eyes begin to flutter close again.

He can’t decide if it’s funny or foolish that you think you can take care of yourself when you can’t even finish your sentence. “Right,” he says, unable to help himself from sounding sarcastic despite your situation. It’s just so stupid how this easily could be avoided if you didn’t push yourself too hard.

He’s in no way responsible for you. He should just walk out like you said. You did this to yourself. There’s no reason for him to stay there.

Yet, he puts down his bag and takes off his jacket.

“Do you have a medicine kit?”

His question is no longer heard. You’re already passed out. He stands up and starts looking around your room for anything that resembles a first aid kit. If you do have one, you didn’t place it where someone can easily see it.

He sighs as he’s left with no choice but to go out and buy the stuff you need. He can’t possibly go through your things. It feels like an invasion of your privacy.

When he comes back from the pharmacy, he’s expecting that you’d ease up even a bit since you finally stopped working. But when he sits beside you again, he can see the same worrisome distraught wrinkling your pretty face.

Alt hough he doesn’t want to disturb you, he has to. He needs to feed you, get you to take medicine, wipe you with cool compress, chang e your clothes, then tuck you back in bed. After that, he still needs to stay to make sure your stubborn ass won’t get back to working once you feel a tiny bit better.

He feels all his facial muscles droop down at the amount of chores he needs to do for you. He really shouldn’t bother. He can just turn a blind eye and go home, leave you alone since you brought this upon yourself.

But there he is, tending to your needs for no substantive reason other than him being a decent person. Well, he’s already taken the first step, so screw it.

He can still work on his own uni requirements while he watches over you anyways.

Although you resisted a bit at first, your own lack of strength makes you give in to his attempt to cater to your sickly needs. The feeding and the medicine was an easy task. You were practically a lifeless doll and just went with whatever he tells you to do.

Now that he’s in your bathroom with a small basin of cool water and a small towel hanging on his shoulder, he contemplates on how to proceed with the next step: a sponge bath. He should just hand you the towel along with a new set of clothes, leave the room, then come back after a few minutes.

Because he is not doing it.

He won’t be undressing you and wiping your naked body. Just no. You should gather whatever energy you have left because you’ll be doing that all on your own.

He dips the towel in the basin and squeezes the excess water out of it. He puts the moist towel in a container and goes back to your bed.

“Hey, sit up for a bit.”

You groan softly, but does as you’re told. He puts the small plastic case with the towel on your bed and helps you get up. “I’ll get you a new set of clothes, then wipe yourself down,” he instructs you.

You let out one short hum of approval, so he goes to your drawers. He pulls the first shirt and bottoms he sees. As long as you have your blanket, it should be fine if you’re not wearing thick clothing.

When he turns around, he finds you holding the wet towel to your shoulder, completely still as you rest against the wall by your bed. You fell asleep with the towel soaking up your shirt.

“Crap,” he curses as he rushes back to you.

He places your fresh clothes to the side and hurriedly removes the towel off of you. He’s about to shake you back to consciousness but aborts his plan as soon as he touches your other shoulder.

You look like you really want to do it yourself as well. Even now, he can see minute movements from your fingers as if you’re still trying to follow his directions earlier.

Goddamn it. It’s really up to him now, isn’t it?

He glances at you one last time, thinking of another way out. If you hadn’t gotten your shirt wet, he would have ditched the sponge bath idea already. Now he’s left with no choice but to proceed with it.

Whatever. It’s just a human body for Christ’s sake. He shouldn’t be as alarmed as he currently is. He’s seen a female human body before. Yours should be no different.

He takes a deep breath and gently tugs up the shirt you’re wearing.

‘They’re just mammary glands,’ he repeats in his head but makes sure his eyes never land anywhere near the blob lump of fat on your chest.

He gets to work, brushing the cool towel starting on the sides of your face, then down to your neck. You must only be half-asleep because you lift your chin up a bit to allow him access to the column of your neck. He keeps his eyes on it as his hand travels down a bit further.

He spreads the coolness of the towel on your chest, but as soon as he feels a particular softness, drags his hands back up. With his hand still on your chest, he feels the pace of your breathing quicken a bit. When shoots his eyes up to your face, you’re already looking at him with dazed eyes and slightly agape mouth.

Beautiful. Too fucking beautiful for his liking.

It’s ridiculous. People are supposed to look like shit when they’re sick, not inviting.

A certain delicate temptation kicks in, urging him to back away a bit to reward himself with a quick sweep of your semi naked figure.

‘No,’ he grounds himself.

He’s not that barbaric. He’s not doing this so he has an excuse to ogle at you.

So why is he doing this?

With the turbulent thoughts reigning in his mind, he unknowingly squeezes the moist towel he’s holding against your skin.

The cool water drenching from his palm distracts him from his pondering. Reflex makes him look at his hand and involuntarily follows the slow trickle of water down the supple mount of flesh he’s been meaning to avoid looking at this whole time.

He realizes he’s been staring, but he’s too enthralled to stop. He lets his eyes wander further down, still watching how the droplet glides to your stomach. It gets absorbed by the fabric as it reaches down the waistband of your shorts.

The absence of the water he’s been trailing with his eyes snaps him out of his trance.

What the fuck is he doing?

He quickly moves on to your arms, patting your skin aggressively and haphazardly so he can finally get this cumbersome chore over with.

When you recover from this, he’s going to barrage you with a litany of fulmination on your self-destructive habits.

He’s supposed to wipe your thighs and legs too, but the idea is already tossed away as his train of thought is antagonizingly twisted today.

As fast as he can, he puts on the shirt he got for you. He was being gentle previously, but his priority at present is to cover up your exposed body away from his sight.

When he successfully clothes you, he gently lays you down again. He pulls the blanket to your shoulders and looks at your overall state.

You look a bit better now so he goes to your study table. He tidies up your stuff and puts them aside for him to set down his own.

Finally, he can get his shit done while he waits for your fever to go down.

He’s halfway through his elective course when he hears you whimper. He ignores it the first two times, but he hears it again louder the third time, he concludes something is wrong.

When he gets to your bed, you’re shivering frantically even with your blanket covering your whole body. He quickly searches for another one and piles it over the one you already have.

It only lessens your trembling but it’s still there. Your pretty face is still ruffled with unease. He touches your arm and finds out that you’re shaking way worse than you look.

In just seconds, he slips inside the blankets and draws you in to provide you the body heat you might need. You desperately cling onto him, pressing your body to share what he silently offered. Your fingers that are clutching the back of his shirt are quivering. You sink your face on his chest with agitation, badly in need for an additional source of warmth.

His displeasure towards your self-negligence dwindles when he feels your trembling body against his. Yes, this might be your fault, but he’s certain you hate this more than he does. Not only are you in pain, but you probably see this as a waste of your valuable time. You brought this upon yourself, but you don’t deserve it.

He encases his arm on your waist and tugs you even closer. He lowers his body a bit and gently nestles your face on his neck so you can feel the direct warmth of his skin on your cheeks.

Within a few minutes, you begin to relax within his embrace. The tremors become less and less until your fingers on his shirt loosen up.

You faintly pull back to look at him. “Sorry, Tsukki,” you mumble groggily with forlorn eyes.

“Shut up,” he utters without any trace of hostility as he cups the back of your head and buries your face on his neck again.

Your grip on him slackens but you don’t let go. You ease into him with your breathing getting even and your heart beating softly against his chest. When your chills completely fade away, he’s left with nothing but the softness of your body within the confines of his touch.

He becomes more aware of your bodies tangled against each other now that you’re completely still. The plumpness of your breasts are pinned on him. Your ample lips are grazing his neck. His pinky and ring fingers are hovering just below your spine, almost touching the curve of your behind.

To make things worse, you begin letting out small moans of succor which he can hear only because you’re too close.

He should be immune to this. He’s already had his fair share of kisses with you and sometimes, it involves a lot of touching. However, it is never as intimate as this. The furthest you two have gone was when he slipped a hand underneath your shirt before your friend barged in.

Before today, he had never seen your bare body. He had never held you to the point that almost your every curve melds with his. He has never thought about what it’d be like to do more than just making out. Only now when you’re not even doing so.

He considers himself a level-headed person driven by logic and rationality, but for crying out loud, your thigh is nudging on his crotch as if challenging his self-control.

As much as he wants to keep himself in check, his own body betrays him when his dick starts to nudge back at your right thigh.

‘Breathe in, breathe out,’ he reminds himself repeatedly to calm himself down.

“Hmmm,” you snuggle even more on his neck, your moist lips tracing his skin before you press it on him as you relax even further.

Fuck.

The shameful tent in his pants is becoming painful on his jeans as his imagination runs wild. How will you sound if it's the other way around, if it's his lips that’s traveling on your neck? How will you react if it’s his palms kneading the supple flesh pressed against his chest right now? Would you blush a deeper shade of red than the one you’re wearing if he slams his…

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He can’t decide who is more sick: you or him, who’s lusting over you despite your situation. His plan to chastise you for your own inattentiveness for your own health is back in action. He’ll make sure it's ingrained into that irresponsible, beautiful head of yours.

To distract himself from his inane fantasies, he forces himself to recall the scientific names of all the reptile species he’s aware of.  And when he’s exhausted his mental list, he moves on to whatever animal species he can think of until he dozes off with you.

--

You haven’t opened your eyes yet, but as you regain consciousness, you can tell that you had an amazing nap. For the first time, you reap the benefits of a power nap. It feels like you slept for a complete eight hours or even more. You no longer feel sick. You celebrate the after effects of the nap, stretching your legs before you get up.

You look out your window and see that the light is still a dark shade of blue so you still have the whole evening to finish what you need to do.

When you turn your glance to your table, Tsukishima’s seated on the floor with his laptop in front of him.

Why is Tsukishima here? You texted him and called off your meeting today.

Something’s off.

You don’t really remember going to bed. You just remember doing one of your subjects when you heard someone knock.

“Tsukishima,” you call his attention urgently.

He turns to you, but you can’t see his eyes from the light reflecting on his glasses from his screen. “What time is it?”

He looks back to his laptop. “It’s 5 am.”

What?!

You didn’t take a nap. You fucking slept. A more horrid realization comes to you when you remember what happened before you did. You passed out and Tsukishima fixed you up.

Shit! He’s been telling you all the time to stop overworking yourself and he had to be there and clean up the mess you did to yourself.

You panic when he sits beside you. You sit properly, hands on your lap, pressed lips, eyes on the floor as you prepare yourself for a long, tedious arduous lecture from the blonde.

“Hey.”

You slowly turn towards him, anticipating the slew of curses about to unroll from him.

“Y-yes?”

You keep your eyes leveled on his chest, embarrassed of yourself for burdening him with your unwell ass.

Instead of speaking, he inserts a thermometer in your mouth, causing you to shoot your gaze up to him. Neither of you say anything and just hold each other’s stare until the thermometer beeps.

He takes it out of your mouth and checks your temperature.

“You’re okay now,” he announces, then starts getting ready to leave. “Don’t bother coming to training later or else I’ll tell Coach that I caught you extremely sick,” he threatens nonchalantly.

Your mind is running laps on how to process everything all at once, but you decide to deal with the most pressing one.

“Uhhhh..”

He glances at you, silently waiting for what you’re going to say, but you only gape at him as well.

What were you going to say again? Shit, you actually can’t remember what it is.

He disregards your quietness and proceeds to your door. “You should just stay in. One day of missing classes won’t cost you your scholarship,” he says before he closes the door behind him.

“Wait.”

He’s gone. It’s only then you remember you wanted to say thanks.

--

When you come back to the gym two days after, everyone expresses their worry about you. You assure them that you’re completely fine now. Even with the love and concern you are showered with, your eyes scan for someone who isn’t among the players in front of you.

There he is, dribbling the ball and is about to do a jump serve. Just before he tosses the ball in the air, he looks at your direction.

“Y/n?” Kogane’s voice pulls you back to them.

“What was that?” you ask because you didn’t hear whatever they were saying.

“He was asking if you’re really okay now,” Eiji says.

You nod enthusiastically. “So stop wasting your training time on me and practice instead,” you say with cheerful authority that they’re very pleased to hear again.

Once the crowd disperses, you spring your way to the middle blocker who didn’t welcome you back.

“Hello!” you greet him sprightly.

“What?” he asks with a bored tone.

You step closer to him for the next thing you’re going to say is for his ears only. “I really appreciate what you did the other day.”

Tsukishima sees the earnest, grateful expression on your face, but what grips his attention is how refreshed you look. You look brighter than you usually do.

He was almost sure that you were going to ignore what he said about going absent on both in classes and in here, but you seem to have taken his advice with how well-rested you are.

But most of all, he didn’t expect you’d bring it up during your working hours. Neither of you talks about what happens in private when you’re the ‘Sendai Frogs’ manager,’ not his classmate, or occasional kiss-buddy .

“I don’t,” he responds vacuously to your thankful sentiment. It was a very tough night for him. When he woke up, his erection was still raging through his pants. As undignified as it was, he got himself off in your comfort room just to ease the unbearable sexual tension that was still there in the morning.

As usual, you don’t take offense from his sour remark. You chuckle whole-heartedly and pat him hard on his shoulders. “Of course you don’t,” you say mirthfully before you walk over to Coach Mira.

It was a very tough night you made him endure, but he’s relieved to see you back on your feet.

--

The team is going to the fourth match of the regular rounds. Three more after this and you get the chance to have a game from the bottom two teams from Division 1.

As you and the team march towards the court, you hear someone call Tsukishima.

“Tsukki!”

You look at whoever it is and stop when you see Kotarou Bokuto, the wing spiker of MSBY Jackals, crazy energy on court, super clean line shot.

He’s waving energetically at Tsukishima while the latter just nods at him. You grab Tsukki by his shirt and stop him from advancing any further.

“You guys go ahead. We’ll be there in a sec,” you tell Kogane who’s the person in front of you. He nods at you then walks off with the rest of the team.

“Why did we stop?” Tsukishima asks with a frown.

“How do you know Bokuto?” you ask.

“I used to train with him during high school,” he says like it’s nothing because to him it really is not a big deal. Bokuto and Kuroo practically coerced him to join their free practices when he already wanted to call it a day. Training with them was a drag - a drag that pushed him to become a better blocker.

Among the four of them who regularly practiced in the third gym, it was him and Bokuto who went professional. Even if the wing spiker is in a higher division, he still sees Bokuto as the same person who told him it only takes one hit to be hooked on the sport. Bokuto just got better at it.

Other than that, he still seems like the silly guy Tsukishima knows him to be.

“Can you introduce me?” you say as you try to hide the zeal in your eyes, but horribly failing to do so.

“Shouldn’t I go warm up?” he counters instead of responding to your question.

“I promise to be very nice to you in the three succeeding training days. Introduce me, please, ” you beseech graciously at him, insistent on meeting the athlete.

“Make it five days,” he tests to see your conviction.

But you easily agree, “Deal!”

Seeing that you won’t let this go easily, he thinks it would be better to just give you what you want.

You both walk over to where Bokuto is. Beside him is another part of the third gym, Kuroo, who’s now the official promoter of the Volleyball Association.

“Hey hey hey, Tsukki!”

“Hey,” the lack of enthusiasm in his response totally contrasts Bokuto’s. “This is-“

“Hi!! I’m Y/n, Tsukishima’s manager,” you cut him off which makes him jolt. Why even bother asking him to introduce when you’re more than capable of doing it yourself?

You grab Bokuto’s hand and shake it vigorously. “It’s such a pleasure to meet you,” you dramatically state, your eyes twinkling with idolatry.

Bokuto, as expected, is exceedingly glad from the adoration. He uses his two hands to shake yours and reciprocate the same energy you gave him.

“I’m such a huge fan. Personally, you’re my favorite player from Division 1. I don’t care what others say. That chest bump. Flawless save!” you drag on, endlessly showering the spiker with compliments which Bokuto is totally eating up.

He’s egging you up even more by constantly nodding, laughing, and agreeing in everything you’re saying.

Meanwhile, Kuroo and Tsukishima are just standing there watching the whole exchange.

“I’m sorry if this is a stretch, but can I hug you?” you ask almost like a tame puppy.

He’s been disregarding the entire conversation, but really? A hug? Have you no shame? Not that he cares but should you be ogling at another athlete when you’re wearing the uniform of Sendai Frogs?

Great. Go worship a big brawny dude from Division 1 minutes before your own team’s game. How thoughtless.

He imagined it would be a civil hug but then you open your arms to Bokuto and envelop him in the warmest hug he’s ever seen you give. His eyes drop to Bokuto’s limbs which are ensnared around your waist as the spiker hauls you closer to his body.

How imprudent. It was a mistake bringing you to Bokuto. You should have known it’s unwise to mix up your personal agenda with your work. You should have known that it was better if you just ignored Bokuto and made him warm up, than make him introduce you to your favorite player.

What is wrong with you?

Kuroo’s attention slips from you to Tsukishima’s change of demeanor. Tsukishima is usually unbothered, but as soon as you embraced Bokuto, Tsukishima’s mood became sour. It is an amusing sight to watch.

He never thought Tsukishima would associate himself with an individual as lively as you. But who could blame him?

He, himself, has just been watching since you fanned the ego of his old buddy. You have not graced him even a glance since you approached them. Your eyes were all set on Bokuto. You’re probably not aware that another presence is also there.

So he’ll make you be aware.

“Ehem,” he clears his throat to grab your attention, which works as you shift your gaze from Bokuto to him. “Hello,” he flashes you the best smile he has, but has no effect whatsoever at you.

The difference in treatment is drastic. While you revere Bokuto with adoration, you regard him like a nuisance. It’s not that palpable, but it’s there. You look at him like he’s an obligation to deal with.

Your smile is rehearsed and so is the cheerful “Hi” that you give him.

“Kuroo Tetsurou,” he introduces as he offers his hand. You take without hesitation, firmly gripping his extended hand for a brisk, professional handshake.

“Y/n, manager of the Sendai Frogs,” you respond in an amicable, yet refined manner. He gets his business card from his pocket and hands it to you.

“So, Miss Manager, how are the Frogs doing?” he asks to strike up a conversation.

You scrutinize his business card for a quick while then pockets it. “I believe as their manager, I, myself, represent the team more than my words can. So what do you say, Mr. Promoter?” The professionalism chips off and reveals a real slice of you - sly and mischievous, as you compose your stature and put a hand on your hip, accentuating your curves.

He crosses his arms as he eyes you from head to toe without any reservation, then back up again.

“I say the Sendai Frogs are looking hot this season,” he says with his own grin that’s just as devious as yours.

“There’s your answer then,” you give him a wink that almost makes his heart flutter.

‘Geez, lady. Take it easy on unsuspecting men,’ he thinks to himself but easily recovers as his grin spreads out.

“Oy, we should be getting back,” Tsukishima says, breaking Kuroo’s trance towards you. You snap out of it as well, agreeing with Tsukishima as you give the blonde a nod.

“It’s so nice to really meet you, Bokuto,” you tell Bokuto before turning around. Even though you’re treating Kuroo as if he doesn’t exist, he can’t help but be intrigued even more by you.

“Bye, y/n,” he says a bit loudly for you to hear since you’re already a few steps away from them.

You’re about to look back but Tsukishima puts a hand on your shoulders and starts talking to you. Kuroo would have disregarded it, but he doesn’t miss the quick glare Tsukishima throws at Kuroo and Bokuto. What’s even more eye-catching is how Tsukishima’s hand travels down a bit on your back.

You don’t take notice of it though. It might because you’re preoccupied or because you genuinely don’t mind. But for Tsukishima to do so, it’s a different story altogether.

“Hey Bokuto, did you see that?” he turns to his friend.

“Uh huh. She’s so pretty!” Bokuto squawks out, obviously not catching what Kuroo did. Kuroo just lets it go since it wouldn’t really do much even if he tries to explain. He looks back at you and agrees with Bokuto instead.

“Yeah, very pretty.”

--

Even though you’re the one who broke off the deal, you still feel the urge to kiss Tsukishima at times. He does too. You notice the way he glances at you briefly then returns to his work as soon you catch him.

It’s not awkward. There’s none of the tension-filled air, probably because you’re both aware that the impulse is there. You just silently agreed to dismiss it.

It’s all good though. It’s for the best. You don’t want another slip-up like the one from the Jaguars’ match. What’s weird is that even though you’re no longer making out, it feels like nothing has changed.

You still sit beside him. He still lets you lean on him. He still lets out nasty side comments but he’s not as rancorous as they used to be.

“You’re spacing out again,” he points out.

“That’s cause I’m done, Tsukishima,” you counter immediately while still gazing at your window across you. “Anyways, I’m gonna nap,” you announce.

He stops typing and looks at you. That’s weird. He’s always the one strenuously suggesting that you take a break when you’re feeling tired. What gives?

“Are you sick?” A bubble of unwarranted concern rises within him from your sudden inclination to take a nap.

“Oh, no. But I’m going to a party later so I need to recharge a bit.” You head to your bed and start straightening out the crumpled bedsheets.

Party? Are you out of your fucking mind? You could rest instead, make the most out of the night by catching up on sleep. But you’d rather attend a pointless party? Here he thought you were being thoughtful of your own health.

Not to mention, there might be perverts getting their hands all over you again. Obviously you can protect yourself, but wouldn’t you prefer not having one ogling and harassing you?

“Mind enlightening me how a vomit-smelling gathering is of any benefit to you?”

“Mind enlightening why it’s any of your business?” you retort instantly.

“It’s not,” he responds just as swiftly. “I’m just curious because I honestly don’t get it,” he says calmly. If you want to go to the damned party, then by all means. He really doesn’t care what you do with your free time.

“If you’re so worried, Tsukishima, you’re very welcome to come,” you tell him, mockery dripping from your invitation.

“I’d rather not,” he says dryly.

You shrug as you slip under your blanket. “Lock the door when you leave.”

“Unbelievable,” he mutters.

--

‘Truly unbelievable,’ he tells himself again as the smell of cigarette and alcohol tickles his nostrils while he sits at the bar, mulling over whatever the hell possessed him to come there.

It definitely isn’t because of you.

He’s not looking for you either nor is he worried about you.

It’s worse than he remembers. There are more people than last time and the music is banging on his eardrums.

“Are you getting anything?” the bartender asks him.

Although he absolutely detests alcohol, he feels like punishing himself tonight for lack of better judgment in coming there.

“Your worst drink.”

--

Even though you slept that afternoon, you still don’t plan on staying out too long for the party. You just wanted to catch up with some uni friends and instead of meeting them all one by one, it would be efficient if you attend this party and meet them all at once.

Although you would prefer if you just slept or watched a documentary, you think it’s necessary for you to be here. You almost don’t have any time to spend with friends. This might be your last chance to do so since it’s almost graduation.

As usual, you avoid drinking since you hate dealing with hangovers. You learned that the hard way when you had to keep up with who’s scoring points in an official match while an invisible hammer pounds your head.

So, despite the endless free shots given to you, you persistently decline. You also did not pay much attention to the dance floor to save your energy.

After a while of talking to everyone you know, you look around to check if you missed anyone. That’s when you catch a glimpse of a familiar blonde slouching by the bar.

‘ No. It’s not possible ,’ you say to yourself but you’re already smiling hard as you saunter to where he is. It’s very unlikely that it’s him but on the rare chance that he is, you’re not going to let it slip by.  

He’s facing down his glass which is joined by two empty shot glasses. You lean back with both your elbows on the counter.

“You new here?” you playfully ask. If it’s not who you think it is, you’ll just dance awkwardly to throw him off.

“I actually am,” he says as he encircles the rim of his glass with his index finger. Then he raises his face to turn to you.

When he reveals his face, you confirm that it is indeed Tsukishima, but at the same time, he looks nothing like his usual self.

The tips of his ears up to his neck are burning red while his eyes are dazed like you’ve never seen them before. But that’s not the weirdest thing.

He’s smiling. He’s fucking smiling like a happy idiot.

“Tsukishima?” you ask him for confirmation in any case that it’s just someone who looks extremely like him.

“Hmmm?” he asks with a little bit of a slur that throws you off.

As if you’re not astounded enough by the scene unfolding before you, he grabs you by the waist and lugs you until you’re situated between his thighs.

“Who did you think it was, manager?”

Part 5 || Part 7 || masterlist

taglist (those crossed out can’t be tagged)

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[jerzwriter]

Chapter 9: What Tomorrow Holds

Book: Open Heart 3 (After Chapter 15)

Pairing: Ethan x F!MC Tobias x F!MC

Rating: Chapter: Teen

Summary: Extended Series WIP – Love Triangle. In this chapter: Bryce’s BNO does not go as planned; Ethan comes face to face with Floria; Tobias and Casey each make an important decision; Casey & Ethan’s parents meet, and Casey & Sienna make a shocking discovery.

Category: Extended Series (WIP)

Warnings: Drinking; language

A/N: OK, to my readers who said “don’t worry about" or even "I like long chapters”, you’re going to live to regret those words. 😊 I apologize! But there is a lot that happens in this chapter and it's really getting us to the next part of the story. Break it down over the week, Ch. 10 may take a little longer anyway. :)

A/N 2: Because this isn't long enough, if you haven't already, the "bonus" chapter of Casey & Ethan reuniting after he returns from his business trip can be found here. This takes place between Ch. 8 & Ch. 9 of this series. It's pure romance and pure smut, it doesn't move the story forward, but damn, it sure does enhance it! :) Good to be home

CHARACTERS BELONG TO PIXELBERRY STUDIOS

If you wish to be added or removed from tags, please let me know. Comments and reblogs are always appreciated. 😊

(Good to be home is a standalone chapter that takes place between chapter 8 and chapter 9, it can be read here.)

It was a typical summer Friday at Donahue’s, busy, but fewer patrons than normal. The sedate environment drew even more attention to Bryce’s semi-sober toast. As part of his ongoing efforts to get Tobias out more frequently, he created tonight's event, the inaugural Semi-Monthly BNO. Bryce loved each one of their friends, but he knew Tobias needed some friend time without Casey present, so the SMBNO was born (though no one would ever remember that acronym).

“So, I am here to make the argument that contemporary society has true reverence for the GNO, as it well should. I will admit, I have crashed a GNO or two… well, or two dozen… so I can confirm that they serve as a wonderful celebration of sisterhood, of girl power, things I fully support these ideals. BUT as a people, as a nation, we have neglected to BNO, and I have decided to do something about that. So, in honor of our first celebration of all thing’s testosterone, I offer a toast… to us… the Earls of Edenbrook!”

“Earls of Edenbrook?” Tobias asked with disgust.

“Cut me a break, bro, I was trying to think of something that begins with an E.”

“You know what begins with E? Elijah and Elijah is wondering why you decided to start this tradition a month before I’m off to New Haven.”

“Ah-ha! You see, that was part of the wisdom behind SMBNO! It is a pact, therefore we must see each other every two months under threat of… what is the threat?”

“Expulsion, but I don’t know if that would serve as much of a deterrent,” Zaid offered.

“Zaid, we are honored that you decided to join us at this inaugural event,” Bryce said saluting.

“Don’t give him too much credit, he owed me a favor, it was this or sit through an upcoming seminar in place of me. Honestly, I am still surprised he picked this,” Baz said with a chuckle.

“So, what are the rules surrounding SBNO, I mean, we’re not exactly the belching and scratching our balls in public crowd, and the women we hang out with are cool, so what sets this apart?” Tobias asked.

Bryce had not thought that far ahead and responding with I’m just trying to get you out without Casey being here didn’t seem appropriate, “I KNOW! We conclude with Karaoke or Bowling,” he said, selecting the two most random things he could think of.

“I vote Karaoke!” Baz yelled.

“I vote to allow the ladies to join us again,” Tobias laughed.

“Well, for tonight, it includes male bonding and darts right here, I’ll dig deeper next time. But, since you insist on doing something to set this evening apart, I suggest that, just for tonight, we entertain the idea of scratching our balls in public.”

Everyone laughed except Zaid who downed his drink, plunked it on the table, and said “I’m out! Baz, send me the info on the seminar.”

“And then there were four!” Elijah yelled.

“How about this, let’s go outside and enjoy the summer weather, we can play some poker?”

“Brilliant, this man is a genius!” Bryce said pointing at Tobias excitedly, “Except I don’t know how to play poker.”

“Do I have to teach you everything, Lahela? Let’s go.”

The guys enjoyed their S-somethingBNO, sans ball scratching, for several hours before it was interrupted by...

“You’re playing poker and I’m not here to kick your ass? In what universe is this acceptable?” Jackie chided.

“Jack, Jackie!” Bryce said astonished, “This is a BNO, SEMBNO, I think… I specifically made sure you and the other lovely ladies were not going to be here this evening so we could...”

“Sit around and do the same shit you do every time we are here, but without us? Sexist much Bryce?”

“I don’t know if your serious Jackie, and I’m a little drunk and a little too afraid to tell you to leave, so pull up a chair and deal.”

“Nah, I’m waiting on Sienna, Case & Aurora, so I’ll sit this one out.”

“Well, I guess we may as well move over to a bigger table and conclude S&MBNO for tonight. I mean, no one was even scratching their balls?” Tobias said.

“It is not S&MBNO, Tobias!” Bryce said with disgust.

Jackie shook her head, “Neanderthals.”

“Hey!” Casey yelled as she walked in with her friends, “Since you guys have had a head start on us, I took the liberty of ordering the girls tequila shots, I’m happy to treat you all as well after we’ve caught up!”

“That sounds good to me!” Tobias said as he tapped the space on the bench next to him, beckoning Casey to join him. Almost immediately after doing so, he realized that wasn’t the best idea, he grimaced in Bryce’s direction, but it was too late. Casey was already happily seated next to her buddy T.

“So, what are you doing here anyway, Case? I figured you and Ethan would be celebrating his return, or are you already tired out.” Elijah laughed.

“Elijah, I never tire out!” She answered throwing a discarded lime at him. “But he had to head into the office, and that is how you have been graced with my presence this evening!”

“And mine!” Sienna chimed.

“So, what’s up everyone? You guys have any luck finding a new place yet?” Baz asked.

“I have!” Elijah yelled, “an old med school buddy of mine is also going to Yale/New Haven, so we got a really sweet place together, just a short trip to the hospital.”

“We haven’t been as lucky yet,” Aurora said, “going from cutting expenses 5 ways to 3 ways is a challenge in Boston, even with better salaries. I mean, we still have med school debt.”

“OK Aurora, stop making me feel guilty.”

“Case, there is no reason to feel guilty! No one is going to fault you for moving in with your boyfriend!” Sienna interrupted.

“I am,” Jackie said as Casey laughed.

“But we are seeing a place that looks promising in South End tomorrow. It’s a little smaller than we hoped for, but it would work for us.”

“Well, I hope so, because Jackie is still threatening to move in with me,” Tobias laughed.

As the night went on the friends split into different groups: Baz and Elijah played pool, Jackie, Aurora, and Bryce had a dart tournament, Sienna bounced around between the two. But Casey & Tobias remained at the firepit, completely engrossed in their conversation. Bryce tried to pry each of them away on several occasions before it became apparent his attempts would be for naught. But when the DJ started playing, everyone met up on the dance floor, including a group of nurses who just came off shift. Carmen was one of the nurses in their group. She was new to the hospital and Bryce had coined her the Sofia Vergara of Edenbrook. He had been trying to get her attention for over a month, but she seemed to be immune to his charms. Seeing an opportunity to end that streak, Bryce waved the group over. But when Carmen began dancing, the only person she was interested in was Tobias who was (of course) oblivious to her flirtation. When the DJ stopped playing, Carmen asked if he would like to join her for a drink. Tobias politely declined stating he was spending the night with friends. As soon as she walked away his friends attacked.

“Are you out of your mind, Bro?” Baz exclaimed, “Everyone in the hospital is in love with her! She hasn’t paid any mind to anyone, not even Bryce…”

“Yet! OK! Yet!” Bryce yelled.

“…yeah, whatever, but Tobias go! Have a drink with her, trust me, we wont mind… we will be impressed. You will be named the King of SEMBON that is… I don’t know what that is.”

“Seriously T, what the hell are you thinking. She is a goddess!” Jackie added.

“T, please. Just go. It’s a drink.” Bryce prodded.

Everyone continued to cajole him, except for Casey. She didn’t encourage or discourage, she just stayed quietly on the sidelines.

Beginning to get frustrated, Tobias was ready to put an end to his friend's well-intentioned ribbing.

“Guys, I’m not interested, OK? Leave it be. Bryce, why don’t you go and see if the 200th time is the charm for you? I want to get back to my conversation with Casey.”

“Whatever, T.” Bryce said shaking his head as he walked to the bar.

“I’ll join you, Bryce,” Sienna yelled.

Once the two were seated, Sienna leaned in close and whispered.

"Bryce, I followed you in here for a reason.”

“You mean it wasn’t just my dashing good looks and exuberant personality?”

“Yeah, no, I’m over that. I wanted to ask you … you seem to … ah heck, what’s going on between Tobias and Casey? I am sensing something and I can tell you do too.”

“What do you mean?” Bryce said putting down his drink.

“At his party on the 4th, they seemed so… connected. I mean, he didn’t take his eyes off of her the entire time we were on the balcony Then, remember how they both reacted when Jackie said she was moving in with Ethan? And tonight, they haven’t left each other side and, I mean, he’s turning down Sofia Vergara for Christ’s sake.”

Bryce looked straight ahead without saying a word.

“And your reaction is telling me I am on to something. What do you know Bryce? You know you can trust me. I mean, I don’t think Casey is involved with him, she’s in love with Ethan and that’s just not her.”

“No, Casey isn’t involved at all. But… and this dies here…”

“Absolutely.”

“Casey doesn't know, but Tobias… he has it bad for her. Like bad, bad.”

“Oh, no.”

“Yeah, he didn't intend for this to happen, but it did and he can't get past it. I mean he turned down single Sofia Vergara to spend the night sitting with all but betrothed to Ethan Casey. That is how bad he has it.”

“You don’t think he’d try to…”

“No. He’s emphatic that he won’t act on it. He loves Casey...”

“Loves?!?”

“Yeah,” he said sadly, “he loves her. It’s not a little crush, Si.”

“Oh, my God, poor Tobias!”

“You have no idea. I doubt he’ll act on it, but you never know… one night if there is too much drinking, someone is vulnerable, who knows what could happen? It’s a freaking ticking time bomb.”

“Not to mention if Ethan found out we will be searching for Tobias’s body parts across the state of Massachusetts.”

“We’d likely have to extend that search into Rhode Island and Connecticut. But here is the thing, he cares about Ethan, too. He doesn’t want to do anything to hurt either of them, but the heart wants what it wants.”

“But spending time with her like this isn’t going to help which is why we are going to go and sit with them. At least it helps for tonight.”

“You go out Si. I just want to clear my head a bit, I’ll be out in a few.”

Sienna hugged him, “You got it, and don’t worry, my lips are sealed. Operation lets end this shit is in effect.”

“And with us at the helm, how can it fail?” Bryce said before ordering another drink. As he was getting ready to return outside, he saw Casey walking toward the bar.”

“Case!” he yelled waving her over, “C’mere!”

She bounced up on the barstool next to him, “What’s up, B?”

Bryce was quiet for a moment, clearly trying to weigh what he was going to say. “Case, I don’t want this to come out the wrong way…”

“Bryce, what’s up?”

“Why were you the only one not encouraging Tobias to go chat with Sofi, uhm, Carmen?”

Casey gave Bryce a disbelieving look, “Bryce, I sincerely hope you’re not implying anything improper between me and Tobias.”

“No! Case, I know you’re with Ethan and like, nauseatingly in love, I just…” he let out a deep sigh, “I’ve been trying to get the guy to just go on a date, with anyone, but he’s in such…. a place … and I mean, he values your opinion, then you're the only one being silent...”

Casey looked at Bryce somberly. “Bryce, he told me.”

Bryce choked on his drink, “He what?”

“He told me. I know he is hurting over someone who doesn’t return his feelings. We’ve discussed it.”

“Uhh, well, how much did he tell you?”

“That is really the crux of it. He would not tell me who she is, and I respect that. I also respect that he’s not ready to be out there again. Right now the best thing I can do is honor his wishes and be there for him. So, I’m not going to push him into something he isn’t ready to do even if everyone else is.”

“OK but, do you think you could let me be there for him a little more. You know, if he needs someone, let him come to me.”

“Are you jealous that Tobias relies on me, too?”

“No, but maybe he needs a different perspective...” Bryce was trying so hard to get the point across without saying too much, and considering his inebriated state, that was walking a tightrope. “Case, I just know a little bit more about the situation than you do, can you just trust me?"

“I trust you, you know I do. But he is my friend too and I’m never going to turn him away if he needs me.”

“You’ve always got to be such a good fucking friend, don’t you MacTavish.”

“Well, isn’t that why you love me.”

He grinned broadly, “It’s one of the reasons I began loving you.”

“Your such an ass, Bryce.” She said hitting his shoulder, “Now, buy me a beer to make up for it…”

“Reggie, please get this lady your finest tap!” Bryce laughed.

“Don’t worry Bryce, he will come around in time. I mean, who knows, in the end maybe it will even work out for him and his mystery lady. Stranger things have happened.”

“Hmm. Yeah. Let’s just get him to start dating again.”

__________________________________________________________

“Hey, welcome back!” Harper yelled as Ethan and Casey entered the team's office.

Tobias, who had been seated at Ethan’s seat, stood up “I’ve been waiting here buddy, ceremonial returning of the chair is now in full effect.”

Ethan smiled, “Thanks guys, but what, no streamers, no balloons?”

Casey stamped her foot, “Damn it! I should have gotten bagels!”

“No, Casey,” Harper laughed, “the rest of us have discussed it and we can only handle that once a year at best.”

“Speak for yourself!” Tobias laughed.

“So, let’s catch up,” Ethan said as he joined his colleagues at the table, “without sounding like Thomas Jefferson, what did I miss?”

“Thomas Jefferson?” Tobias asked confused.

“From Hamilton. Daveed Diggs. You know ‘What did I miss, what did I miss, Virginia my home sweet home I wanna give you a kiss,” Casey sang.

Oh, they clearly got laid last night. Tobias said to himself with a sincere chuckle. “You have him listening to Hamilton now?”

“Well, I was not throwing away my shot to teach him about a modern classic,” Casey laughed.

Harper rolled her eyes and chuckled, “OK, this has been delightful, but let’s get to work? This is the one last time we are having Hamilton puns today.”

“Oh, I agree,” Casey said, “Especially since In the Heights is trendier now, anyway.”

Everyone erupted into laughter.

Tobias’s eyes were bright and he had an adorable smirk on his face. He looked over at Casey, she was so happy and radiant. Then he looked at Ethan who, in the sixteen years he knew him, just never looked the way he did now. Hamilton puns during Ethan Ramsey’s morning meetings, and Ethan is laughing along with it? It was surreal. At that very moment, Tobias resolved that he would do whatever he could to get over Casey. Things were too good for her, for Ethan, and even for the team. If that ever changed, he did not want it to be a result of anything he did. Casey looked over and shot him a smile, which he returned. I have got to do it, he thought, but it sure as fuck isn’t going to be easy.

_____________________ Bryce ran into Tobias in the hallway, “Hey man, I’m running down to the cafeteria to grab some breakfast, join me?”

“Yeah, I could stand a little something. I was sure you’d be hurting, you seemed to have a few more than normal last night.”

“Well, that’s the power of youth, old man.”

Once their breakfast and a table were secured, the two sat for a quick bite. Tobias was quieter than usual, but he was a big hungover despite Bryce's protestations, so he didn't notice. Finally, Tobias let out a sigh and said, “You’re right.”

Bryce was about to put a forkful of scrambled egg whites in his mouth, but Tobias's words caused him to drop his fork to his plate with a loud clang.

“I’m sorry, could you say that again. I don’t even care why you said it, I just like hearing it… louder this time.”

“Is that what you sound like during sex, Lahela?”

“LOUDER! I am what???”

Tobias grumbled, “You are right. I need to move on. Maybe I should start… dating again, I’m sure in time it will…”

Bryce looked astonished. “Bro, I would come over there and kiss you right now, but all kinds of rumors would start, and then neither one of us would be dating much, so the kissing is implied, OK?”

Tobias laughed, “You’re one of a kind.”

“Look, I happen to have it on good advisement that Carmen is working the afternoon shift on 4 East, not that I have checked her schedule or anything… and for you, brother, I’m willing to step aside.”

“You know, if I’m going to date, I think I would like to keep it away from work for the time being.”

“Good idea. I do know this amazing woman from my hot yoga class, I will get you details, and we'll take it from there…. I am very happy to hear this news, T. Let's get you some practice dates, then when you’re back in fighting form, go get Carmen because, if you don’t, I will have to lose any respect that I ever had for you!”

“On that note, I’m going back to work. Baby steps, Lahela, baby steps.” ____________________

The workday had been quiet and uneventful, a rare treat at any hospital, but that was about to come to a screeching halt. As Casey turned a corner, she came face to face with,

“Hello Casey! It’s lovely seeing you.”

“Floria," Casey replied doing her best to hide her surprise, "You are looking well. What are you doing here? I thought you were discharged last week.”

“Ten days ago, to be exact. Tobias truly is a miracle worker,” she said through an ingenuine smile.

“Dr. Carrick is a wonderful physician. So, what brings you to Edenbrook?”

“I’m here on some personal business, nothing I’m at liberty to discuss yet.”

“Oh, well… OK… I’m glad to see you’re doing better, take care.”

Ethan was at his desk immersed in work, even though Tobias did not miss a beat in his absence, there was still an avalanche of e-mails and paperwork to be tended to. He was so engrossed he did not even look up when he heard footsteps entering the office door.

“Well as I live and breathe. Dr. Ethan Ramsey, how long has it been?”

Ethan looked up over his glasses. Whatever feelings were percolating inside of him, they were not visible on his exterior. With complete indifference he uttered, “Not nearly long enough,” before he turned back to his work.

“Well, I can’t say that I blame you for your reaction. But honestly, I was pleased to see your name on the door as I passed by. It gives me a chance… well, to do something I have wanted to for a very long time now. Ethan, I owe you a sincere apology.”

He sighed deeply and rolled his chair back from his desk, “Floria, you don’t owe me a damn thing. Now, why are you in my office and what can I do to facilitate you leaving as quickly as possible?”

“God, the greetings in this place are just… unpleasant at best. But, at least in your case, it is well deserved.”

She took a seat.

“Floria, I would really prefer if you didn’t sit here, I…”

“Ethan, I just want a few minutes of your time. I get why you don’t want to see me, but this is important. I really wouldn’t bother you but… I am going to be working at Edenbrook, starting tomorrow. Since we are going to be working together, I wanted to smooth things over with you, as much as I can.”

For the first time since she walked in the door, Ethan’s emotions betrayed him as a mask of shock, anger, and disgust engulfed his face.

“You what?”

Leaning back Floria continued, “I will be Dr. Reynold’s new assistant. I’m just finished completing the paperwork.”

“Dr. Reynold’s…assistant… when did this come to be?”

“He and I go back a while; we became friends while Peter was teaching at Northwestern. I was looking for a new position and when I was being treated here, I ran into Jon, and well, the rest is history.”

Ethan was fighting to hide his exasperation. Floria would be working at Edenbrook. Not just at Edenbrook, but with Dr. Jon Reynolds. A doctor whose office was just down the hall. A doctor with whom Ethan and the department interacted frequently.

“Peter is making you work now? I didn’t see that plot twist.”

“Actually, Peter and I are divorcing, which is why I needed a job. Me being admitted here turned into a blessing because I ran into Jon and, poof, I start tomorrow!"

Admitted here? When the fuck was she admitted here? “I hadn’t realized you were admitted here. Then again, I have been away.”

“Really?” she said dumbstruck, “I'm shocked Tobias didn't mention it.”

“Tobias?”

“Yes, he was my doctor, can you believe it? Got me out in record time, I’m sure you can imagine why.”

“As I said, today is my first day back and, since you were not a diagnostic patient, there was no need for me to be informed.”

“I guess. It’s just… he was so unnerved by my presence, I figured he would have phoned you right away.”

“Tobias isn’t unnerved easily, Floria. I wouldn't give yourself so much credit.”

“Well, I wasn't admitted even 24-hours before he pulled his girlfriend off my case and took it over himself. So, if he wasn't unnerved, I think we can at least say he was unsettled."

“His girlfriend?”

“Yes, Dr. MacTavish, I believe? Casey? Sweet young thing, I really liked her. Honestly, I'm shocked she sees anything in Tobias. She could do better.”

Ethan's eyes turned into steel daggers as he fixed them on Floria. He steadied himself before speaking, doing everything in his power to restrain his growing anger.

“What, in your twisted mind, leads you to believe that Casey is Tobias’s girlfriend?”

“You know hospital gossip! Honestly, she must inspire a lot of jealousy because she is a hot topic. I overheard the nurses discussing her boyfriend on the diagnostic team, then some residents mentioned she was moving in with him. Well, given how protective Tobias was of her, how his eyes lit up every time he said her name, I just assumed. Besides, you’re the only other man on the team, and I sure as hell knew she wasn’t moving in with you, I mean, cohabitating and serious relationships, that's not exactly your… or… oh, my God, is she your girlfriend? Oh, I’m sorry, here I came to make peace and…”

“Floria, I’m quite confident that you know she is not Tobias’s girlfriend. You haven’t even officially started yet and…” he stopped to take a deep breath, “Let me be abundantly clear, you do not want to start something that I will need to finish. I am not a naïve 26-year-old anymore. This isn’t med school. You’re not screwing someone with power to get the upper hand. I have the power now, Floria, and I have no problem using its full force if I am pushed to do so. Do not play with me, I’m warning you. Do not play with Tobias. And, let me make this painfully clear to you, do not even entertain the idea of entertaining the idea of doing anything to Casey. If you so much as cause her to have a difficult afternoon, I assure you that you will live to regret it. Am I making myself clear?”

“Jesus, Ethan. And here I was thinking Tobias was protective! It was a simple misjudgment on my part. I apologize. I did not realize she was yours. For what it’s worth, I’m happy to hear it, I did think she was lovely and I’m glad to see that she did better than Tobias after all.”

Unamused, Ethan shook his head, “Stop playing games Floria, stop them now, before you even start.”

“Ethan, I don’t blame you for thinking the worst of me, what I did to you, it was horrible, but the same way you’re not 26-year-old Ethan, I’m not 24-year-old Floria. I have lived with a lot of guilt over what I did and I am certainly not here to create any drama. I’m sure us being friends isn’t a possibility, but I want to at least be civil with one another, that’s my only reason for coming to see you today.”

“Floria, apparently I’m going to be forced to work with you. I intend to be polite and professional, and I expect you to do the same. But do not for one moment delude yourself into believing that I trust you. Stay out of my life and the lives of those I care about, do your job and go home, and we will have no problem.”

“In time you’ll see I’m being sincere. I’m sorry, this truly didn’t go as I had hoped.”

“Mmmm hmmm. If you could see yourself out, I do have work to catch up on.”

“Sure. I’ll get out of your hair.”

“That would be greatly appreciated.”

____________________

As soon as Floria exited the office Ethan took off his glasses and threw them on his desk. Rubbing his eyes, he sighed deeply. This cannot fucking be possible. He stood up to close the door and when he was just a few feet away Tobias came barreling in.

“Hey, Boss!”

“Tobias,” he said sternly, “come in and lock the door behind you.”

Oh shit. Tobias took a seat in front of Ethan’s desk as Ethan paced the office.

“When exactly were you planning on telling me that Floria had been admitted as a patient at Edenbrook? That was a patient of yours?”

Tobias let out a deep sigh. “You aren’t going to believe this, but honestly, that is why I was heading in here right now.”

“Was it? Because from what I understand she was admitted just after I left which means you had a full month to tell me, yet you found this very moment the best time to do so. So, this is simply out of expediency? Why didn’t you tell me sooner, Tobias??

“Ethan, give me a moment to explain…”

“Please do. I’m curious to see how you spin this.”

“It’s not a spin, I’m giving you the truth. Floria was admitted the day you left; she was one of Reynold’s patients assigned to Casey. She only saw her once before I found out and reassigned the case to myself. I wanted her treated and out of here. I wanted her to be invisible to you and Casey. I didn’t want you to hear her name if it could have been avoided. Ethan, I know the damage she did and… I was trying to protect you, that’s all.”

Ethan looked conflicted.

“Tobias, I believe your heart was in the right place and I appreciate your desire to protect me and, more importantly, Casey. But I don’t need protecting, I need to be informed. That woman is a viper, and the fact that she came in touch with the woman I love, that in and of itself should have initiated a call, Tobias, don’t tell me you don’t understand that!”

“Ethan, you just left, you were going to be gone a month and there was nothing you could do. I knew there was a good chance you would lose your mind and that would impact your work at Mayo. I didn’t want her to know you were on staff, I didn’t want her to know who Casey was… it was mitigation Ethan. Perhaps I could have made better choices, but I honestly did what I thought was best at the time.”

“Tobias, within the past year, you have earned my trust again and I don’t want that to diminish. I am not happy about this, even though I do understand where your heart was. Please, do not let this happen again. We have to have total honestly here, nothing less. Do we have an understanding?”

“Yes. Of course.”

“She was just here.”

“Wait, she was here? Why?”

Ethan shook his head. “Because beginning tomorrow she is going to be Dr. Reynold’s new assistant.”

“What? Are you fucking kidding me? You have GOT to be fucking kidding me?” Tobias jumped to his feet, it was now his turn to begin pacing.

“I wish I were. And she is already playing her bullshit games.”

“Meaning?”

“Well, she told me how you took your girlfriend off of her case.”

Tobias cocked his head at Ethan, “My what?”

Ethan sat back in his chair. “Your girlfriend, Casey.”

“What the…”

“Let’s just be grateful she is using an old playbook, so we can get ahead of her. I sent a message to Naveen. I just want him aware of the situation in case anything should come of it.”

“Not a bad idea.”

“You want to talk about mitigation?” Ethan sighed deeply, “I’m going to talk to Casey, she needs to know what we’re dealing with here. I already told Floria if she fucks with Casey…”

“If she does, she will have both of us to deal with. I’m not letting her hurt anyone I care about. Period. Ethan, I’m worried about you too, I had a front-row seat to the damage she did to you, and I know…”

“Tobias,” Ethan interrupted, “I am not the same man anymore. I have hindsight and I am better equipped to deal with this.”

“I know that. But she has a way of worming herself into people’s minds without them even knowing and, I just… Ethan, I have known you sixteen years, I have never seen you so happy or in such a good place and, I just don’t want to see that change.”

Ethan stood up and put his hand on Tobias’s shoulder. “That means a lot to me. I’m glad we are back on the same team. I’d love to give her the benefit of the doubt, but that little act she just put on tells me nothing has changed with her. I know we will need to talk more on this, I need to clear my head for a moment would you mind if I just took…”

“Yeah, yeah, no worries, I’ll get out of your hair. I will also fill Harper in, she needs to know as well.”

“Good idea and, Tobias, I mean it, I’m glad you’re back in the friend column.”

Tobias smiled, “Same here, brother.”

As soon as Tobias left the office he reached out to Casey.

Casey headed to Ethan’s apartment. He had texted her that he would be late catching up at work, so she wanted to get a jump on dinner. She was anxious about the situation with Floria, she picked up her phone to call Tobias at least five times while she was preparing spaghetti sauce, but she could never bring herself to hit call. She and Tobias had talked enough and, going forward, any conversations about this needed to be between her and Ethan. Fortunately, as soon as she was taking the sauce off of the stove, she heard his key in the door.

“Hey, Hun,” she said running over to hug him.

Ethan fell into her and the warmth of her embrace helped melt his tension away. “God, I love coming home to you.”

“Well good!" She said, "you have a lifetime of it ahead of you.”

“I am one hell of a lucky guy.”

“Do you want to eat right away or unwind for a bit first?”

He walked over to the wine rack and pulled out a bottle. “Get two glasses and meet me on the couch?”

She snuggled next to him as he poured.

“There is a situation I want to discuss with you. I know you were treating Floria Dawson, well, for a day. Are you aware of who she is?”

Casey lowered her eyes a moment before returning his gaze. “Yes, Ethan. When Tobias took me off of the case I was, well, me and demanded a reason why. I wasn’t relenting so he eventually told me who she was and why he didn’t want me on the case. I am sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I’ll be honest, I didn’t disagree with Tobias, get her treated and get her out and forget about her existence again. But I should have told you, Ethan, I hope you’ll forgive me.”

Ethan put his arm around her, “I would have preferred if either of you would have told me, but I understand why you both felt the way you did. If I’m being truthful, you may have been right. I was 1,000 miles away, at the start of a complicated research project and my head would not have been in the game. Still, l would have rather known, but I can’t be angry at you when it’s something I probably would have done myself if the situation was reversed.”

He gulped his wine and kissed Casey on top of her head, “Unfortunately, Floria is going to be working in Edenbrook as of tomorrow, as Dr. Reynold’s assistant.”

“I know, Tobias mentioned it to me after he saw you.”

Ethan appeared to be a bit taken aback for a moment, but it passed quickly. “Well, it appears he has given you quite a bit of information.”

Casey squirmed, “Ethan, I…”

“Case, honestly, I’m glad he did. This way we can get this over with quickly and enjoy our night, heaven knows the last thing I want taking space up in our home is Floria. The woman I knew was treacherous and I have no reason to believe she has changed. She stopped by my office under the guise of making peace, and she proceeded to tell me about Tobias’s girlfriend being taken off of her case.”

Casey pulled out of his embrace and looked at him incredulously. “What now?”

“Yes, that’s the game she is playing. She claims to have overheard hospital gossip about your boyfriend and put 2 and 2 together and came up with 5. Of course, I am pretty confident that she purposely added wrong. She likely assumed she could make me jealous, put a wedge between us, or either of us and Tobias… I don’t think it was an innocent miscalculation.”

“Jesus! How did this woman end up here, working on the same damn floor as us no less?”

“Well, apparently she and Reynolds go back… he hired her direct. For now, we just have to keep our eyes open and cope. I need you to promise me you will do your best to avoid her, because, Case, if she hurts you in any way, I swear…”

“Ethan, I’m a big girl, and she isn’t going to hurt me.”

He smiled wanly, “I said the same thing to Tobias about myself earlier. But I know all too well, she can do damage that you don’t even see until it’s already done. So, please, let’s just be vigilant around her, OK?”

Casey put her wine glass on the table, “Or course baby,” she said pulling Ethan into a hug.

“So, we’re having spaghetti?”

“Yeah, well, you know… my culinary skills and all,” she said with a grin.

“I’m sure it will be amazing. Oooh! I meant to tell you, I got us tickets to see the Boston Symphony Orchestra later this month. You haven’t been to any performances at Tanglewood yet, have you?”

“No, but it is on my bucket list!”

“Well, I’m glad we can cross that off. Trust me, you’ll love it. I got four tickets, who do you think we should bring along?”

“I’d love to bring Sienna. She is the one most upset about all the changes going on.”

“OK, that’s one. Who should number two be? I was thinking maybe asking Tobias would be a nice gesture, what do you think?”

Under normal circumstances, Casey would have immediately said yes, she considered Tobias to be one of her best friends and she was so happy that he and Ethan were rebuilding their friendship. But after hearing about Floria ‘suggesting’ that she and Tobias were a couple, Casey was unsettled. Like Ethan, Casey did not believe Floria was being honest about her assessment. Then again, Casey could not deny that countless patients, waiters, sales associates, and acquaintances who saw the two of them together instantly assumed they were a couple as well. Plus, there was an element of guilt, she didn’t tell Ethan about Floria, she shared that secret with Tobias. When she thought she might be pregnant, she didn’t call Ethan, it was Tobias who sat by her side as she waited. She knew there was no impropriety, or was there? She and Bryce were equally as close, yet there were no such issues with him. In fact, even Bryce was disappointed the other night when Casey failed to encourage Tobias to try to date again. As all of this swirled in Casey’s head she said:

“You know, as much as it would be nice, I don’t think the symphony is Tobias’s thing. Plus, it would be difficult for the three of us to get the same night off.”

The second the words left her mouth, she felt a pang of sadness that she could not quite explain. She cherished her friendship with Tobias, and she was not about to let that change. She knew in her heart there had never been anything improper that took place between them, but suddenly, everything felt questionable and it didn’t feel good. Was this indicative of something deeper that she could not see? Or was this Floria successfully weaving her way into her mind? Casey was too busy coping with the insidious thoughts swirling in her mind to analyze it.

“Casey, Casey…”

She heard Ethan’s voice, “Oh, yes. Sorry, Honey, I just zoned out a bit. Uhm, we have time to think of who we can bring. I mean, maybe even your Mom or Dad, or your Mom and Dad, I don’t have to ask Sienna.”

Ethan noticed Casey’s distraction and pulled her in for a quick hug, “It doesn’t matter, we have time to worry about that. I’m just looking forward to going with you, I think you’ll love it.”

“I’m sure I will.”

____________________________________________________________

Two Weeks Later (Mid-August)

“Casey, my Dad just called, they’re running late, so it looks like we will be entertaining your parents alone for a little bit.”

“OK, we can handle that. I'll put out some appetizers to hold them over, it’ll work,” she said with a smile.

“Now, I know I’ve beat around the bush with this, but since they will be here any moment now, let me be blunt. Your Dad is fairly old-fashioned and now, in what has been essentially 5-months, I’m moving his precious baby girl into my lecherous bachelor pad and there is no ring on her finger. I know he liked me, but that was before… should I be prepared for a duel or anything?”

“Of course you should. Why the hell do you think I’ve had you boning up on Hamilton?” she laughed. “Seriously though, my Dad is the type that wouldn’t have me moving in with you until 3 weeks after we were married, just to make sure the marriage took if he had his way. But, fortunately, my Mom and I are enlightened and we tend to have him wrapped around our little fingers. So he is honestly very happy for us.”

“Hmm… wonderful. That whole wrapping men around your finger thing is multi-generational. So I truly have no chance, do I?”

Casey spit out some of the wine she was sipping, “Oh, yeah, Ethan. Because in our three years together you have always done exactly what I have wanted.”

“Well, maybe not initially, but you’ve sort of got me now.”

“Good, then the spell is finally working! Oh, Mom text! They’re here! Oh, God, we’re introducing our parents!”

“Yeah, if mine ever get here, let’s go start round one.”

Ethan had met David and Rose MacTavish before, the first time being under tragic circumstances when Casey was dying and Ethan was frantically trying to save her life. At that time, all David knew of Ethan Ramsey was that he was his daughter’s idol, boss & mentor who was clearly distraught over everything taking place; but Rose knew more. While Casey had not confided every detail to her mother, she knew enough. She saw that her daughter was in love with Ethan long before Casey ever admitted herself, she knew how Ethan would push her away, to pull her back and do it again hurting her more each time. And she knew that Ethan boarded a plane to the Amazon a week after he left Casey's bed without so much as a word. She watched her daughter try to stay afloat at that time and she worried that each day could be the one when she finally drowned. Rose and Casey were very much alike, they both had quirky, outgoing personalities and big hearts that easily gave love and were often quick to forgive, but Rose wasn’t sure she could ever forgive Ethan for the callousness he displayed toward her daughter. He was older, he was her boss, he knew Casey idolized him. Casey forgave Ethan long before Rose ever entertained the idea. Yet, when she met him for the first time, one look in his eyes was all she needed to see to understand the depth of his love for Casey and how horrified he was at the thought of losing her. Since then, they had met on numerous other occasions and Rose began to see what Casey saw in him. Today, she was one of his biggest fans. Casey and Rose did their best to give David a sanitized version of the past three years when the couple made it official in the spring. David had his misgivings at first, for Ethan and Tobias combined could not give Mr. MacTavish a run for his money when it came to being protective of Casey. But it only took a few times of seeing the couple together for him to realize that they shared something very special. He was now elated that his daughter had found the kind of love that he and his wife had been blessed to share. But, yes, he would have liked to see a ring on it before the change of address, but Mrs. MacTavish already got him in line on that front. After greetings and a quick tour of the apartment, Ethan brought mimosas out to the balcony where they all took in the beautiful views of Boston on that splendid August day.

“Ethan, this view is spectacular. The biggest problem that you are going to have is that Rose will be trying to move in soon, this has always been her dream,” David laughed.

“Well, not necessarily my dream, but I’m quite content with it being my daughter’s so I can visit now and again,” she concurred.

Rose leaned across the table and took her daughter’s hand and then reached over for Ethan’s. Giving them both a squeeze she said “I hope you both know how happy Daddy & I are for both of you.”

“That means the world to us, Mrs. M… ROSE. I will get this, I will call you Rose,” Ethan laughed.

“I’m looking forward to you meeting Ethan’s parents, they should be here very soon. Dad, I think you and Alan will probably be meeting somewhere in Darien to go bowling in no time.”

“Darien?” David asked.

“Yes, Darien, Connecticut. It’s the halfway point between Providence and Philly, I took the liberty of calculating for you to save you both time,” Casey laughed.

“Always thinking ahead!” Ethan nodded. “David, I’m going to head down to the liquor store to get some ice, would you care to join me?”

“Oh, of course..”

“Ethan,” Casey whispered, “we have an ice maker in the fridge…”

“It’s not working right, we’ll be back soon,” he said giving her a quick kiss, “before my parents arrive, don’t worry.”

As they left the balcony, Casey gave her mother a perplexed look, “Our ice maker is working fine, what is that about?”

“Are you sure?” Rose asked, “Should we go check?” She asked conspiratorially.

“Ahh, you know what, I’m not going to worry about it, this gives us some time alone to catch up!”

“Yes, it does! So, how are you baby girl? I don’t know if I’ve ever seen you so radiant.”

Casey smiled warmly and leaned her head onto her mother’s shoulder. “Thank you, Mom. I am happy I’m really happy.”

“It looks like you knew what you were talking about, if you had taken my advice on many an occasion we wouldn’t be sitting here today.”

Casey chuckled, “Well, Ethan didn’t always make it easy. Truthfully, it was always a gamble, and I decided to roll the dice. I’m just blessed it turned out the way it did because gambling is always a risk.”

“He’s a good man, Casey. I see what you did all along.”

“Was that the doorbell?” she looked at her phone, “Oh, it’s Alan, looks like they got here sooner than expected, come let’s go meet them.”

Casey and her mother moved inside and welcomed Alan and Louise. Alan was his usual vivacious self and he affably greeted Rose. But Casey immediately noticed that Louise appeared more withdrawn than usual, of course, Alan had said that she was under the weather this morning which could be an explanation.

“Louise, this my mother, Rose, mom, this is Ethan’s mother Louise.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Rose said shaking her hand.

“Likewise,” Louise said her eyes began to immediately dart around the apartment. “Casey, where is Ethan.”

“He and my Dad went to get … ice … they should be back any moment now.”

“Oh, OK. Can I use the restroom, it’s been a long ride?”

“Of course,” Casey said, “Mom, Alan, why don’t you sit out on the balcony, we will join you momentarily.”

“How are you feeling, Louise? Alan said you weren’t well this morning.”

“Yes, well, I’m fine now, Casey. Thanks. I know the way from here.”

“Oh, OK. Well, I’ve got to get some things in the kitchen, I’ll wait for you there.”

Casey stood at the kitchen island and watched Louise as she walked away before she began preparing some of the plates to go out onto the porch. After several minutes went by, she went to check on Louise to find that she had already bypassed Casey to join Alan and Rose on the balcony. I hope she is OK, she is acting peculiarly. Casey was carrying two trays in her arms when the door opened, her Dad and Ethan were boisterously conversing about golf when they walked in. GOLF? Ethan freaking hates golf, why the hell are they talking about golf, and excited about it no less? Ethan was a little taken aback when he saw Casey standing there.

“Oh, Honey, hi! Let me help you with that!”

“Uhm, your parents are here, they’re on the balcony with my Mom.”

“OK, give us these trays, let us help then,” her Dad said.

“Uh, sure, but… where is the ice?”

Ethan and her dad both looked at each other nervously. “They were out,” Ethan said.

“The liquor store was out of ice?”

“Yes.”

“OK, so did you try the 7-11? It’s right next door.”

“Didn’t think to. But, let me get that food, come on, everyone is going to be starving.”

Casey shook her head, OK, what were those two up to?

The rest of the afternoon was lovely, it was such a nice day they barely stepped inside. Casey was right, her Dad and Alan were already exchanging Facebook information and discussing when they could come to spend a weekend together in Boston, Rose and Louise were getting along fine, but Rose seemed to be making the most of the effort.

Louise only seemed interested in talking to Ethan, which Casey didn't mind. She knew how profoundly happy Ethan was to have her back in his life, so it didn't bother her if she monopolized him now and then. She just found it odd that she was being so disatant with her today, Louise had always been very loving toward Casey. But she certainly wasn't being rude, Casey figured she was making too much of it.

As dusk began to fall, Rose jumped up. “Ooh, I have a surprise for you I’ll be right back.”

“Oh, I know what this is,” David said, “Ethan, keep your girlfriend away from the edge of the balcony over there.”

“Great Dad, now he knows where I get my flair for the dramatic from,” she laughed.

Rose came out with a large box and a bag, “One is for now, and the other you may want to freeze, but here are… whoopie pies….”

“NO FREAKING WAY!!!!! OMG!” Casey yelled.

“What one person calls a flair for the dramatic, another calls years of experience and knowing what to expect,” David laughed.

“What are whoopie pies?” Ethan asked, earning a death glare from Casey.

“Ethan, if you’re planning to spend the rest of your life with Casey, I strongly suggest you come to spend a weekend in Pennsylvania so you get to know all her favorite foods, otherwise, you are doomed.”

“Yes, my husband is correct, but, there is more...”

“BAGELS!!!! PHILLY BAGELS!!!!”

“Now, this I already knew…” Ethan said laughing.

“Oh, my heart is SO full right now!” Casey said jumping up to hug her parents.

“I’ve officially taken note, if I ever screw up don’t send her roses, but dozens of carbs.”

“A man who learns fast!” David chuckled.

After eating the delicious whoopie pies and coffee, Casey’s parents headed out since they had a much longer drive home. They insisted they would come up for a weekend in September to help Casey move, even though she told them 70% of her things were already at Ethan's. Ethan whispered to just let them be, their "help" could easily just become spending time together.

Once her parents were on their way, Alan joined Casey as she was putting things away in the kitchen.

“Hello, Honorary Daughter-in-Law!” He said giving her a big hug.

“Hello, Honorary Father-in-Law!’

“It was lovely to meet your parents, your Dad is a great guy…”

“He told you about Darien, right?”

Alan laughed, “Yes, he did, you’re very proactive!”

“I am a diagnostician, Alan. I had a feeling you two would hit it off famously."

"Ah, having two of you in the same family would be tiresome if you weren't so amazing Casey!"

Casey laughed, " Alan, can I ask you, is everything all right with Louise? She has not been herself, I know you said she wasn’t feeling well earlier…”

“She did feel off this morning, but... I don't know Casey, she has been different lately.”

“Different how?”

“More distant, a bit moody, depressed even. I haven't seen her as frequently and if I ask about it she becomes upset. I don't want to push, I mean, some people found it odd that we became friends at all."

"But you had. And she was happy about it, she told me herself, so the fact that she changed is of concern. Has anything else odd happened recently?"

"I found out that she missed a week of work from Mrs. Davis. She's an old friend who owns the store next to the florist. I mentioned it to Louise and she just said she had a stomach bug and didn't make much of it."

"Really? I don't think she mentioned that to Ethan, and I know he speaks to her twice a week. He would have definitely mentioned that to me. I don't like the sound of this, Alan. Do you think there is any chance she could be relapsing?”

“I mean, I haven’t seen any signs.”

“Alan, many of the things that you are telling me here are signs.”

Casey looked out to the balcony and saw Ethan and Louise engaged in an animated conversation, both smiling brightly.

“Well, she looks happy right now. I mean, Ethan is just delighted that they have been building a strong relationship again, but I think he has to know about this."

"I would hate to see it put a strain on them."

"Alan, Ethan is a physician, we know addiction is a disease and, sadly, sometimes relapses happen. But it's better to get ahead of it. Do you want to talk to Ethan, or shall I, or we can do it together."

“Let's talk to him together. Want to set up a zoom tomorrow night, I wouldn't want to spoil today. It was wonderful meeting your parents, it's always wonderful seeing you and, look at them out there."

"I'm sure there is no harm in waiting until tomorrow. I'll text you the details. It will be fine Alan like I said, we just have to get ahead of it."

_________________________________________________________

Last week of August

“Casey, wait up!” Sienna yelled. “Are you getting ready to leave for the day?”

“Yeah, just have to stop by the office and then I’m going Ethan’s to change. I’m so excited about tonight! Three years in Boston and my first time going to Tanglewood.”

“I know! Everyone keeps telling me how much I will love it! I brought my clothes to change in the locker room, want to meet me there and I’ll go with you to Ethan’s, or as we have to start calling it, your place.”

Casey laughed, “Yeah, he has already told me that I will need to be punished each time I call it his apartment from now on.”

“Well, a great way to make sure you never stop calling it his place I guess?”

Both women broke into giggles.

“Well, this is me,” Casey said when she reached the diagnostic office, “I’ll meet you in the lobby in 15 minutes?”

“It’s a deal!"

“Hey, Ethan!” Casey said greeting him with a kiss by his desk. “You excited for tonight! Si and I can’t wait.”

“Of course I am, but some last-minute headaches.”

“Oh?”

“Workwise, I just have to finish one thing up. But I also have to call my Mom's therapist, he left a message for me earlier and we scheduled a call in 15 minutes."

"Oh, do you want me to wait around then, I mean, if it's important.."

"No, no, it's just a standard check-in, everything is fine. Do you want to take the T home and get ready, I can leave and get you from there, we’ll still have plenty of time.”

“That works!”

“One other thing, we have a spare ticket, after all, my Mom missed the last train that would get her here on time. I hate to see the ticket go to waste… I know you said Tobias probably wouldn’t be interested but, honestly, I’m sure he’d just love spending time with us and Sienna, so why don’t we ask him. It can’t hurt.”

“Uh, sure. I mean it’s last-minute now, but I can ask. He was just at the nurse’s station, I’ll see if he’s still there on my way out.” She leaned over and kissed the top of Ethan’s head, “I’ll see you at home then?”

“AT HOME. Excellent, you are finally making progress!”

“Shut up, Ethan!” She said closing the office door.

Casey spotted Tobias about to enter the elevator.

“Tobias! Hold that for me!”

“Hey stranger,” he said holding the door for her.

“Stranger?”

“Yeah, it’s been a good 3 hours,” he said with a smile.

“T, I know it’s very last minute, but Ethan and I are going to Tanglewood with Sienna tonight, we have another ticket and we’d love it if you could join us…” she trailed off when she noticed his face drop a bit.

“Is everything OK, T?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I would love to go, but I can’t. I have plans… I have a date tonight.”

Casey stepped back a bit, “Oh! Oh, I didn’t realize… Uhm, oh…well, that, that’s good. Right? I mean that’s good I guess?”

“I guess,” he said with a sad smile.

“Is this your first d… you know what never mind, pretend I didn’t say anything if you want me to know you’ll tell me. So Casey is going to shut up now.”

Tobias tilted his head and smiled. “Casey can always ask Tobias anything, she knows that right?”

She rolled her eyes and laughed, “Yeeeahh, she does. I’m happy for you T, and I’m not going to bother you, but if you ever want to dish, well, Tobias knows he can always tell Casey anything, he knows that right?”

Tobias rolled his eyes and laughed, mimicking Casey he said, “Yeeeahh, he does!”

They both laughed. When they stopped they stared at each other smiling, probably for a little longer than either of them realized.

“Well, I have to go meet Sienna. I hope it goes well tonight, Tobias. I’m happy to see that you’re trying to move on,” she said as she hugged him.

Tobias hugged back and he did not let go as quickly as he should have, instead he closed his eyes and swallowed as he took in the scent of her hair.

Stepping back he put on a brave front.

“Yeah, to trying to move on,” he said, “you around at all this weekend? Maybe I’ll give you a call.”

“Not only am I around, but I’m also off! Ethan is working so call me anytime, I should be free.”

“I will kid. Enjoy your night.”

__________

Casey and Sienna arrived at Ethan's, uhm, Casey’s apartment. Sienna was in charge of trying to find someone to take the remaining ticket. As Casey changed in the bedroom, Sienna yelled in from the kitchen.

“Casey! Raf said he can go, he will meet us in front of the building in 15 minutes!"

“Perfect!”

Casey’s phone began to ring, she smiled when she saw it was Ethan.

“Hey Baby, what’s up?”

“Hey, I’m leaving the office right now, I will be there in about 20 minutes, but I realized I left the tickets at home, can you bring them with you?”

“They're not digital?”

“No, I got these through my membership so they're paper, they will be in my desk drawer or on the top shelf of my closet. Come to think of it, I think I left them there with some of my notebooks."

"Dr. Ramsey, being all messy like that? Is there something wrong with you?"

"Yes, it's called I used to put things away where they belonged before bed, but now my sexy girlfriend wants me in bed and I'm helpless to say no."

"I think you can handle that, so what if things are a little messy! Should we wait for you outside?"

“That would be best. See you soon love.”

“Sienna, can you do me a favor,” she yelled, “Can you look in Ethan’s desk drawer and see the tickets are there.”

“Sure thing!”

“They’re not there Casey!”

“OK, thanks.”

Casey looked at herself in the mirror, All set! Now let’s just get the tickets!

She stepped into Ethan’s closet and she immediately saw his notebooks. She reached up and pulled the corner down, but something fell off of it, hitting her on the head and then falling to the floor. She kneeled over to pick it up and her heart started racing.

“Oh, my God….” she gasped. “Oh, my God! OH, MY GOD!!! SIENNA! SIENNA!!! Come here!!!”

Sienna came running in, “What is it Case, are you okay…” Sienna said breathlessly.

“Oh my God, Si, is this what I think it is?”

Sienna clasped her mouth and gasped, "I mean, it really can’t be anything else…”

“Oh my God, Si, I didn’t do this! It was on the shelf, and when I pulled the notebook off it hit me on the head, and then it fell to the floor, and I swear to God I was not snooping!”

Sienna just stared with her hands over her nose and mouth.

“Sienna, say something, what should I do. I mean, I had no idea, and now I feel so bad…but, Jesus does he has good taste or what?"

“Good taste?!? Casey, that’s a 3-carat diamond with side stones, that’s not good taste, that’s a fucking masterpiece. OH MY GOD CASEY, he’s going to propose!"

Chapter 10: Unsteady

Permatags: @adiehardfan @barbean @binny1985 @bluerosesbloom

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[giogiohcs]

Brothers x Trans man!MC

I didn’t write for Asmo bc I didn’t feel like it😖

Also how am I a trans man yet I sucked at writing this??💀

Lucifer

-When you come out to him, he accepts you, of course, but that doesn’t mean he understands.

-He’s a boomer, a sexy boomer but still a boomer😔.

-He’ll understand the concept of “being born in the wrong body” but if your journey is any different than that, it’ll cause him to be confused but he won’t ever admit that.

-He will need a through talking to, an honest and frank discussion about it, like what you plan to do, will your relationship change? Etc.

-When you mention wanting to get surgery or taking testosterone to change something about yourself, it’s hard for him to come to terms that you’re not doing this because you hate yourself but the opposite. You’re transitioning because you love yourself❤️.

-When he realizes that last point, he’ll be helpful and listen to what you want. He’ll even help you financially to transition if you want to.

-He doesn’t like the thought of you staying extensively on Earth for surgery and recovering but he’ll be patient for you.

-Will be a strict enforcer of your pronouns and new name, if you have one. He’s taking NO shit. A three strike rule? No it’s actually a one strike rule :). Get it wrong once and you’re done for.

-Is he using that one bit as an excuse to punish others especially Mammon? Maybe... He’ll stop if you want him to, but don’t✨.

Mammon

-When you come out to him, he’s confused, very confused.

-Of course, he loves you but he doesn’t understand at all.

-“Why do you want to change? I thought we were fine!?!?” His insecurity will come out when you come out.

-Thinks that you’re coming up with a weird way to break up with him, honestly.

-Along with Lucifer, will also need a talking to. You need to reassure him that you still love him and that your relationship is FINE. Even when he’s being a insecure little baby about it.

-After, he understands why you want to transition and wanting to take testosterone or getting surgery.

-He’ll look up the costs and even if it hurts his very soul, will start saving money to give to you for your next birthday. Expect him to be busy with modeling shoots.

-Will complain about having to memorize your new name and pronouns, if you have one. But suddenly like magic✨ will memorize and get it tattooed to his brain when you tell him that you’ll let him go on a shopping spree if he gets them right.

-Will never admit it but he’s excited to start calling you his boyfriend.

-Also he will brag to his brothers that you came out to him FIRST. He’s your first everything now! Little ego boost, as a treat.

Leviathan

-“We’re just like that one couple in ‘I’m Transitioning and I Don’t Know How To Tell My Demon Lord Boyfriend!’!!!”

-He accepts you and understands that you’re trans, no need for a discussion.

-But that’s AFTER he freaked out when you sat him down and tried to come out to him.

-Just like Mammon, he thought you were gonna break up with him so he didn’t allow you to speak before running away to his room and locking the door.

-🚪🏃🏻💨 🏃💨 WHY ARE YOUR RUNNING? WHY ARE YOU RUNNING?

-Reassure him that you still love him and that your relationship won’t change and he’ll be fine❤️.

-Levi is also gonna recommend trans and other queer animes to you.

-He’s trying to be a good boyfriend and order you questionable transitioning stuff from Akuzon.

-Have you gotten a cursed binder from him? Yes.

-Are you still wearing it because you literally can’t take it off? Yeah...

-But does it make you look flat af? 🥴Definitely yes.

-Is Lucifer gonna have to get involved to get you out of the cursed binder? Also yes.

Satan

-Completely understands and accepts you, he’s done extensive research in humans queerness, genders and sexualities

-He’s grateful that you love and trust him enough to come out to.

-Will offer to help you transition, whether it’s helping to convince Lucifer to let you leave Devildom to get hormones and/or surgery or helping you transition with magic 🪄.

-Don’t take the latter option.

-He’ll help you navigate through the nonsense that doctors and counselors try to put you through and speed up your medical transition process.

-“Oh? The doctor said you can’t get testosterone without going through [insert time-consuming bullshit]? Well actually, what he’s doing is considered medical malpractice due to law IQH.175 that was recently passed and it’d be just awful if he got jailed for it :).”

-Very helpful.

-Like Lucifer, a one strike policy is put into place.

-Also like his brother, he’s gonna use it to punish others ESPECIALLY Lucifer.

-Let your man have his fun❤️.

Beelzebub

-Doesn’t understand at all but accepts you. Says if you’re happy, he’s happy.

-Memorizes your new name and pronouns, if you have one, like that *snaps fingers*.

-You thought you were so glad to have just a caring and sweet boyfriend.

-That was until you start talking about transitioning through surgery or testosterone then he gets worried.

-Why would you want to change yourself? You’re already perfect in his eyes.

-...He really doesn’t get it.

-Thinks you want to change yourself because you simply don’t like yourself so he starts viewing transitioning as a bad thing.

-You need to sit down and talk to him about, well, everything.

-You’ll probably need to keep things simple but frank for him. Maybe make a comparison to exercising, a person doesn’t need to hate themselves to start working out right?

-He begins to understand why you do the things or want to do the things you do.

-Beel still views you as perfect no matter what you look like, but starts shifting his complements from “you’re perfect the way you are” to “you’re really handsome.” And complements your changes.

-He’s very proud by how far you’ve come.

Belphegor

-When you sit him down for a serious conversation, he, just like his other brothers, gets worried.

-Are you breaking up with him? Did he sleep away on too many dates? Is it because he killed you before? Etc etc.

-He becomes a cranky baby from all the bad thoughts in his head but then you come out to him.

-He’s surprised but also not really.

-He’s mostly just glad that you weren’t breaking up with him.

-Says he accepts you and just sleeps again.

-Memorizes you new pronouns and name, if you have one, very easily. He loves you after all.

-All’s well that ends well.

-That’s until you needed to go to earth to transition then he become a cranky baby about everything again.

-“Why can’t you do transition here? With magic? It’s so much easier and you won’t have to leave..” He tries to reason with you.

-Starts thinking that you’re just trying to escape from him, to go back to earth where you know he can’t get to you.

-Against all of his fears, he lets you go to earth.

-He has to start cuddling with his brother again because he just misses you so much.

-His heart is broken and honestly thinks that you’re never coming back.

-When you do come back, first time since you left, he’s gotten up from bed just to drag you down with him under the covers.

-You two have a lot of catching up to do.

[imkylotrash]

Meeting The Folks

Pairing: Saul Silva x reader

Requests: Student!reader x Silva, where her friends, her roommates find out and help her get him, like help her dress, sneak around and everything? Anonymous And Student!reader x Silva, about how they tell her parents that they are together? It would be even better if her father or mother was like "wait, Silva? Saul Silva? This Saul Silva that...". Anonymous

Tagging list: @grey-girl​​ @anreeixcobra​​ @kingunder221b​​ @lflores2008​​ @alexiapayne12​​ @quuenofblacks​​ @quarterback-5​​ @bitchwhytho​​

It’s not easy hiding a relationship from the girls. Especially not when you’re dating the head of the army but you manage to do so for almost 8 months before they discover the truth. It happens one morning when Terra is about to go to the green house. You’d never imagine someone being up at 6am on a Saturday so you don’t do your normal check before leaving Saul’s quarters. Unfortunately, the way to the green house leads straight past there so you practically walk right into Terra. 

“Was that-” You hush her checking to see if anyone else has decided to take a morning stroll. She looks like she’s about to burst from excitement but stays quiet until you’re satisfied that she’s the only one here. 

“Did you just leave Mr. Silva’s room?” she whisper-yells and you’re hoping that Saul won’t come out. The last thing you need is him panicking over the fact that someone knows. 

“It’s a secret. You can’t tell anyone. It would be really bad if the wrong people found out,” you warn her hoping she understands that this isn’t one of those things she can just blabber to everyone. 

“How long?” she asks. Going against your gut feeling, you tell her a brief summary of how you and Saul found yourselves falling in love. 

“Remember when I got promoted to be his assistant? It meant a lot of late nights and difficult discussions. We didn’t plan for this. It just happened along the way. But if Farah found out, I might get kicked out of Alfea. And Saul would definitely be banned from here.” You can’t believe that you managed to keep this a secret for so long and just days before graduation someone finds out. 

“I won’t tell. Promise.” She pretends to lock her lips and throws the key away. This definitely won’t a secret tomorrow. You spend the day worrying about Terra and you don’t relax until she’s back in the suite with the other Winx girls. When she sees you, she gives you a not-so-secretive wink making you facepalm yourself. 

“Did you guys want to get some dinner?” you ask looking around at the girls. You’d been their mentor when they first arrived to the school but the friendship stayed even after they’d settled in to Alfea. 

“Aren’t you having dinner with Sa-”

“Terra!” you yell and she immediately covers her mouth. 

“I’m so sorry, it slipped out.” But the damage is done. 

“Who is she talking about?” Stella smirks starting to list names of the boys in your year. The only who stays quiet is Musa. When you lock eyes with her, you realise why. 

“Don’t,” you mouth to her hoping she’ll understand and she gives you the slightest nod. She must’ve felt your anxiety at Terra almost saying his name and put two and two together. You have no doubt that she knows Terra was about to say Saul. 

“There’s also Sander,” Stella says still listing the names of boys not realising she’s looking for the name of a man. Specifically, a man older than any of the students. 

“It’s Saul!” you exclaim bending under pressure. You’ve wanted to tell them for so long and now that two of the girls already know, you may as well you say it. You want to be able to talk about him to someone that isn’t him. 

“Have you been sneaking around with Mr. Silva?” Bloom asks making you sigh. 

“Please just call him Saul,” you say but they all refuse. 

“We’re not the ones sharing a bed with him. I’ll stick to Mr. Silva,” Aisha laughs and the rest of the girls nod in agreement. 

“I can’t believe that you’ve robbed me of helping you with your outfits for dates, creating little meet cutes between the two of you. We could’ve helped come up with ideas for dates,” Stella pouts adding, “I’m not mad. Just disappointed.” Over the next couple of days, Stella makes it her mission to make up for lost time. She plans all of your outfits, arranged cute little moments for you and Saul all while making sure no one interrupts you. It baffles you just how good she is at this. Saul takes the news of the girls finding out surprisingly well. 

“Now that we’re so close to graduation, I don’t see how it’ll make much a difference.” You’re happy he’s okay with them knowing because that makes it so much easier for you to suggest telling your parents. 

“You want to what?” he asks almost choking in his food. 

“I want to tell my parents. You said it yourself, it doesn’t make that much of a difference now.” You’ve always been close with your parents and it’s been killing you to have to hide this from them. He can’t argue against his own logic so the day after graduation you find yourself on the road preparing to introduce your parents to Saul. 

“Are you sure it’s a good idea? Maybe we should wait.” You’ve never seen Saul nervous before and you quickly decide it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen. 

“They will love you. Almost as much as I do,” you smile hoping you’re telling the truth, “but maybe you should wait outside and let me test the waters first.” He agrees clutching your hand in his. Seeing your parents fill you with happiness even with the knowledge of what you have to tell them. 

“We are so proud of you!” your mother exclaims congratulating you on finally graduating. They’re both hold very important positions in your realm meaning they couldn’t get time off to travel all the way to Alfea but they demand to get all the details now that you’re here. 

“Well, I do actually have something to tell you.” To buy yourself some time, you grab one of the cookies that your mother has put out on the table and take a few bites. They have enough common sense to let you work up the courage on your own rather than push you. 

“I’m seeing someone,” you start and are quickly interrupted by your mother’s cheers. 

“We have to meet them! Do you have a picture of them? Or maybe they came with you?” She’s so caught up in the fact that you’re dating someone, she doesn’t wait to hear who it is. 

“Mom, I’m happy that you’re happy but you may want to wait until I tell you who it is.” You take a deep breath to calm yourself. 

“I’m dating Saul Silva.” 

“Saul Silva?” Your mother sits down looking a little pale. 

“Wait, Saul Silva? As in Head of the Army Saul Silva? The man who’s killed 13 Burned Ones?” It’s the first time your father chimes in and you can see the confusion on his face. Of course, they both know who Saul is but they definitely didn’t expect you to be dating him. 

“The Saul Silva who’s not only Headmaster for the specialists but also the fencing instructor on Alfea?” 

“That’s the one,” you say trying to figure out if now is the time to bring him in. He’s probably trying to eavesdrop by the door. 

“I can bring him in if you’d like,” you offer to which your mother springs up from her chair and grabbing the fancy platters. 

“Why didn’t you tell us you were dating such fine company. The table is all wrong.” That’s your mother in a nutshell. She runs around using her magic to redecorate and move around furniture. Your father remains seated apparently in shock so you figure now is as good a time as any. 

“Saul,” you call after opening the door. Immediately, he’s by your side his eyes asking if everyone is okay. 

“I think you may be their favourite,” you laugh taking his hand to lead him inside. 

“What an honour to have you,” your mother says shaking his hand. Your dad gets up to do the same but he doesn’t let go of Saul’s hand. There’s a little bit of a challenge in your father’s eyes and Saul accepts it. The testosterone is heavy in the air as they try to crack each other’s hands. 

“That’s enough,” your mother says signalling for all of you to sit down by the table. They spend the next three hours questioning Saul and his intentions for you. At no point do they mention his age - the one thing you were worried they’d be upset about. It seems that all they really want is for you to be happy. 

“Don’t be a stranger now,” your mother says standing in the doorway as you’re about to head home. You wave goodbye one last time before getting in the car. 

“That went well,” Saul says acting as if he wasn’t worried to begin with. You roll your eyes but smile nonetheless. 

“Just take me home,” you say with closed eyes. Your hand comes to rest on his thigh, a habit you’ve created after driving with him many times. 

“Yes, ma’am.”