#it would be so funny if he got an infection and died that way | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

theetherealbloom · 2 years ago

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UNEVEN ODDS — CH. 1

Chapter One: These Questions Take Shape

Summary: The Reader is dragged into the Last of Us universe and has no choice but to watch the events unfold live in front of her or will she be able to change what was already written?

Paring: Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 6.1k

Warnings: Age-gap Romance, Violence, PTSD, Depression, Zombies, character death, swearing, angst, fluff, eventual SMUT, MY SCIENCE MIGHT BE WRONG, plot holes, rusty writing, alternate universe

A/N: I write?? Kind of?? Tbh, this self-indulgent for sure! We love maladaptive daydreaming :) Anyways, English isn’t my first language so please forgive me for any grammatical errors or spelling mistakes! Tbh I was just gonna write one chapter per episode but I got too excited :p

Song: doomsday by Lizzy McAlpine

-> Next Chapter | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

YOUR OBSERVABLE UNIVERSE – 2023

It’s been three years since the pandemic, COVID-19 has taken a toll on many people. Millions have died over the past few years and you were one of the lucky ones who got by, survived, and received the vaccine as soon it was available. The world slowly begins to open up and awake from its slumber during those years of uncertainty.

So what do you do now?

You work, continue with your quantum physics research and try and make sense of your life. Someday you’ll be able to be under the mercy of light to choose your fate and your need to find certainties and concrete science. For now, you enjoy the comforting sounds of characters conversing with each other.

Immediately as the show credits show, you fold your laptop close and prepare for bed. Episode 3 of the Last of Us was the most emotional so far, Bill and Frank’s story reminds you that love will transverse in every universe. With these tired eyes, you’ve seen enough for tonight. Your eyes slowly droop down and close, luring you into a deep sleep in a state of wishful thinking, hoping that you would have that kind of love in your life. But for now, the watercolor vivid dreams will suffice.

TLOU WORLD – 2023

You groggily wake up and find yourself on the floor. Slowly as you sit up, you use one of your hands to rub away the sleep, “What the hell,” you mumble. The anxiety begins to creep in, you recognize the coloring of the walls and the type of flooring used.

You look down at yourself to check what you’re wearing, no longer in your sleep clothes but traded away for cargo pants, a shirt, socks, and black boots. What’s more concerning was the familiar voices just outside the tattered room you were in.

“There’s not gonna be anything bad in here?”

A gruff response comes, “Just you.”

“Oh, funny.”

No. God, no way. This is not happening. This isn’t possible. You must be dreaming, right? You quickly stand up, and as soft footsteps come closer, you see Ellie staring at you with complete shock, “Holy shit!” she screams.

The thundering thumps of footsteps quickly make their way into the room as you stand there in complete shock. Your eyes widen in shock as you are now face to face with the characters you’ve grown to love from last night through your laptop screen right in front of you. This feels like a very cruel joke.

Dark brown eyes, salt and pepper hair, tan skin, and lines that appear as Joel frowns at you, unimpressed and suspicious. While Tess is completely covering Ellie, she narrows her eyes at you and says, “Raise your hands.”

Slowly you follow her command and raise both your hands, not wanting to increase the tension between you and them. Then you try your best to steady the trembling voice that wants to escape from you and directly look at Joel to say, “I’m not infected.”

“Show us your arm and neck.” He replies with his thick southern accent, and you bring your hand to the collar of your shirt to show them your neck and then lift the sleeves of your jacket to prove that you are being truthful.

The tension between the four of you still hadn’t dissipated despite proving that you didn’t have Cordyceps. “You got any weapons?” Tess asks and you shake your head, “No.”

Ellie groans in frustration, “Guys, I need to pee.” And you bite back a smile, her attitude, and unintentional humor. You clear your throat and say, “Um, you two could interrogate me in the other room so she can, uh, relieve herself.”

Ellie’s two protectors give each other a knowing side glance and proceed to lower their weapons that were aimed at you. You take a deep breath and then follow Joel as he first leaves the room while Tess watches and follows you from behind, making sure you don’t try anything funny.

You stand in the center of the room, with lush green grass, and flowers, you tilt your head up to look at the stream of daylight hitting your face. You take note of the overgrown plants and trees, mother nature taking back what’s hers. Eco-brutalists would be ecstatic about all of this, minus the fungi zombies.

Tess breaks the silence and asks, “What’s your name?” You give them your name and ask for theirs, even though you didn’t need to however, it is the polite and fair thing to do. You turn your head to look at both of them. They reluctantly tell you to give them their names as you try and manage to swallow away the fear and secretly hope this was all a dream or maybe a fucked up prank. Tess raises one eyebrow at you, “Where are you from?”

You purse your lips to a thin line and wonder how the hell you were gonna answer that question, you then settle for a, “It’s complicated.”

“Complicated how?” Joel gruffly asks you and you give him a light shrug in response and he scoffs.

Your shoulders sag at his reaction to your words, “I’m not trying to be difficult, I swear. It is complicated and hard to explain, you wouldn’t believe me if I told you. And to be honest, I’m trying my best to wrap my head around this and find a way to explain it without sounding completely insane.”

Joel all but frowns at you but continues to ask, “You tryin’ to get to the QZ?” And without even thinking about it you shook your head in disagreement, and immediately followed your response with suspicion growing on their faces and a frown.

Tess looks at you in disbelief and says, “So, what the hell are you doing out in the city with all the infected running around? Going for a stroll?”

Not wanting to answer the question, you pivot to looking at his fractured hand and give him a light nod, gesturing to it, “Does it hurt?”

Tess glances at his hand and pushes Joel to sit on his chair, his hands shaking as he looks at his bloody knuckles. You also choose to sit on the plush cool green grass, the smell of earth fills your nostrils, and then watch the scene play out in front of you.

“Broken.” Tess states that Joel avoids eye contact with his partner in crime, “Maybe a hairline. It’ll heal fast.”

Tess looks down at the grimy floor and folded her hands in an attempt to calm herself, then raises her head as she whispers, “She made it through the fucking night, Joel.” He shakes his head at her, “It doesn’t matter. It’s gonna happen sooner or later. All right? We’re still close to the wall. We sneak both of them back into the QZ. We find a different way to get the battery.”

“This is our best shot,” Tess says unwaveringly with her decision while Joel scoffs, you watch them both like a tennis match and are surprised by the fact they didn’t even acknowledge your presence.

“We take her back into the QZ, someone’s gonna notice her arm. They’re gonna scan her then they’ll kill her.”

He harshly whispers back at Tess, “Well, better them than us. You need to stop talking about this kid like she’s got some kind of life in front of her.”

It felt like extreme deja vu watching Joel and Tess argue, and on queue, Ellie walks back in and throws the magazine on the floor, and slides towards Tess. The kid plops down to sit next to you on the lush grass and you look at her with a small smile.

“You hungry?” Tess asks the both of you as she rummages through her backpack to find the energy bars, “You can share some of ours.”

“Thanks. Marlene sent me with my own.” Ellie says and takes out a chicken sandwich from her bag pocket. Tess looks at you, offering some and you politely decline, the older woman tilts her head and says, “When was the last time you ate?”

“Yesterday.” You say without a thought.

“You wanna try to explain’ how you got here? Cause when we checked, you sure as hell weren’t here. Or how the fuck did you manage to survive this long with nothing?” Tess says as she chews on the bark this world now calls food. You feel your palms sweat and pulse slightly increase, you take a deep breath and say, “This is gonna sound extremely bazaar and completely impossible but try to keep an open mind because literal infected are roaming around the streets so believe anything is now within the realm of possibility. Okay?”

You got a couple of hums with curious gazes and listened as you began to speak, “I’m possibly from a different universe or world where this is all just fiction and you’re characters based on a video game-made television series. No, I have zero ideas how I got here. I went to bed and fell asleep, and next thing I know, I woke up with this painful migraine and fatigue, different clothes and you three suddenly existing.”

You paused as you took in the group gaping at you and you sigh, “From where I came from, we had a similar thing happen, a pandemic. However, it was a virus, not Cordyceps. We called it COVID-19, it could be transmitted through an infected person's mouth or nose in small liquid particles when they cough, sneeze, speak or breathe. The outbreak started in December 2019 and 6.84 million people died in the last three years during that time. We were able to make a vaccine at a rapid rate since our technology had advanced, and we were able to distribute it globally, so in the current year which we both share, which is 2023, we’re slowly trying to find our footing again as the world opens up.”

You feel your eyes glaze over, and you then shut them as you continued, “I know it sounds fucking impossible, trust me, a lot thought so too. My scientific hypothesis is that the multiverse does exist and somehow sleep or dreaming is connected to it. I really don’t know, it was all just theoretical.”

“Prove it.”

You open your eyes and look at Joel, completely surprised he spoke, “What?”

Joel’s baritone voice and defensive stare felt like electricity through your bones, “I said, prove it.”

If there’s anything you were good at, it was reading a ton of books in a short period and memorizing the important details and plot points. Visual memory paired with the love you had for these characters had you rewatching the three episodes over and over again. Quietly, you thank the younger you for being so nerdy.

You look Joel dead in the eye and turn to the kid beside you quietly looking at you while eating her sandwich, “Your name is Ellie, you got bitten by an infected while you snuck into the mall and then Marlene found you soon afterward. Those two,” you point your thumb in their direction, “need to get you to the state house in exchange for a battery so they can go find Tommy who has been missing for almost a month.”

“Holy shit. She knows my name.” Ellie said with her mouth full of her food.

You turn back to look at Joel and Tess, and then glance at his broken wristwatch, “And, um, Joel, I know how your watch broke, I’m so– .”

“Stop.” Joel lowly says, his stare as cold as ice and distrusting of you. You avert your gaze, and a blanket of silence covers the room. Shakily Joel eats his bark of food and Tess stares at you and Ellie as she chews and swallows, “Is that chicken?”

“Yup. Marlene said they get it from smugglers.” Ellie then thoughtfully tilts her head, “Guess not you guys.”

That does it for Tess and stands up to walk towards you and the kid, “Hey, hey!” Joel says as he stands up after her but Tess holds her hand out to stop him and to signal it’s fine, “Why are you so important to Marlene? And don’t lie to me, or we’ll take you back.”

“Like she said,” the kid gestures to you, “If you take me back, you don’t get your battery.” Tess scoffs, “You heard that?” and Ellie shrugs at her, the older woman mock laughs, “Then you must’ve heard he wants to shoot you.”

Ellie looks toward Joel and he doesn’t deny it, he simply stares back at her.

“If you do that, it would be the dumbest shit you’ll ever do.” You mumble while frowning, Tess turns to you and harshly says, “Zip it, this doesn’t concern you.” And you take what she said in stride and don’t push it any further.

She then crouches down to talk to Ellie, “I’m gonna talk to you like you’re an adult. Okay?” She then takes Ellie’s silence as consent to continue, “Joel and I aren’t good people. We’re doing this for us because apparently, you’re worth something. But we don’t know what you’re worth if we don’t know what we have. So answer my question.”

Ellie rolls her eyes, rubs her face, and mumbles to herself, “She told me not to tell anybody and now I’m telling the first people that I…” She lets out a sigh and reluctantly speaks, “There’s a Firefly base camp somewhere out west with doctors. They’re working on a cure.”

Joel immediately groans in frustration, “I’ve heard this before.” Ellie continues, “And whatever happened to me,” and at the same time she and Joel say, “is the key to finding the vaccine.”

He sighs in exasperation, “That’s what this is? We’ve heard this a million times. Vaccines, miracle cures. None of it works. Ever.”

Ellie stands up, “Fuck you, man. I didn’t ask for this.”

“You and me both.” The grouch turns to his partner and says, “This isn’t gonna end well, Tess. We need to go back.”

You then remember after all those essays and news articles about your pandemic, the time when everything felt so hopeless and scary. You look at Joel and you see a reflection of your own, his fear and panic, “It’s possible.”

They both turn to you and you continue, “Theoretically, it’s possible to create a fungi vaccine, however, I’m not even sure you have the technology to produce it. And it would take finding out what Ellie truly is. Either Ellie’s immune system mutated and created antibodies to fight against the Cordyceps or something else… But either way, a vaccine or maybe a cure could be possible now because of her.”

Tess stands up, as do you, and looks at Ellie for a moment, then to Joel to say, “Let’s just finish it. It doesn’t matter if she is what the Fireflies or what an alien says.”

“I’m human.” You grumble and Tess ignores you, “If they believe that she is then we get what we want.”

Joel gives a glare at Ellie and then shifts his gaze to you, he sighs and shakes his head, “If she so much as twitches.”

Ellie proceeds to make gurgling noises and movements to pretend as if she’s turning into an infected. Tess turns to look at her and scolds in a motherly fashion, “Don’t.” You try and hold in your laugh and the young girl clears her throat, scratches the back of her neck, and mumbles, “Yeah… okay.”

Tess then turns to Joel, “Okay?”

Defeated, Joel swings his arms open and whispers, “Okay.”

The foreshadowing of the fact it will not be okay in the next few moments had you feeling nauseous. The churning fear begins to bubble inside of you, Tess is going to die, albeit a noble and honorable death, but it still would hurt Joel, and Ellie as she slowly grows more fond of the older woman. Then, it hit you, is it possible to change what already was written? Could you save them all? Well, you’re already here, might as well try.

The three of them begin to pack their belongings as you awkwardly stand there with your hands in your pockets and watch as they prepare for the journey to the State House. The sound of Joel picking up his gun catches Ellie’s interest, “Can I have a gun?”

“Absolutely not.”

“No.”

“Okay. Fine. Jesus. I’ll have to throw a fucking sandwich at them.” Ellie then shoves the leftover sandwich into her bag and Joel goes to the giant bookshelf, which is blocking the door, to the side, then peaks out of the door to check if it’s safe. You hear the sound of birds chirping and feel the warmth of the light flood in the abandoned building.

“It’s clear.”

Following Ellie from behind, you begin walking slowly toward the light and into the apocalyptic city. Your eyes take in the sight of tilted, destroyed, buildings, overgrown plants, trees, abandoned cars, and trucks. A hauntingly beautiful sight if you were being honest.

Ellie gasps in wonder as she takes it all in, “Woah.” Tess looks over at her and says, “Yeah, looks different in the daylight, huh?” Joel quickly scans the area, “We should get moving.” Tess begins to take the lead, followed by Ellie then you, while Joel trails from behind.

“It’s like a fucked up moon.” Ellie moves towards a crater and peers over it, “Is this where they bombed?”

“Yeah, they hit most of the big cities like this. They had to slow the spread somehow.” Tess says and Joel continues to walk past it, ignoring the crater and any kind of conversation. “Worked here, but it didn’t in most places.”

Unconsciously, you begin humming to the tune of a Linda Ronstadt song. The last song you ever heard before sleeping. Continuing up to a ruined building, with debris blocking your path, “So the State House is across there. It’s about a ten-minute walk if you could go straight.”

Ellie looks at both of them and you wonder how the fuck you were gonna defeat the clickers later on with no weapon, “So…”

“Long way or short way?” Joel asks Tess, she holds the straps of her backpack and the wind blows through her hair, “I mean, it’s a long way or the we’re-fucking-dead way.”

“Well, I vote a long way just based on that limited information,” Ellie says dryly, and Joel stares at her, a puzzled expression on his face, then his eyes lands on you, waiting for your input.

You frown at him, “No, don’t look at me like that. I’m not giving you any spoilers.” Joel clenches his jaw and turns to Tess, “We have to check it from the hotel first.” She begins to walk away, “Okay.”

You walk along the highway in somewhat comfortable silence, you carefully look to the ground and see a giraffe plushie, the symbolism doesn’t escape you, knowing all too well what it meant. Moss and different kinds of plants grow over the cracks of the road, you spot branches atop abandoned cars and dust covers the windows of each door.

Tess and Ellie begin conversing in front of the group, while you and Joel follow from a distance. You look at Joel and say, “I’m sorry if I overstepped a while ago. I couldn’t prove it unless I told you something only you knew.”

He looks at you in an emotion you can’t quite understand, but still responds in his grumpy demeanor, “Just don’t bring it up again.” You quickly nod, “Mhm, noted.”

It was quiet for a bit until, to your surprise, he asks you, “What did you do for work?” The smile was so difficult to hold back, you chuckle and raise your eyebrows, “I’m… well, was a Quantum physicist. You were a carpenter right?”

“It kinda’ freaks me out how you know that off the top of your head.” His Texan accent heavy as he spoke, you knew that it would take time to build his trust. His reserved and security-oriented nature would prove to be a challenge, but something you wholeheartedly would take on, “I’ll try not to do it as much, I’m sorry.”

“You apologize too much.”

“It’s a habit I’m trying to break, to be honest.” You chuckle nervously, putting your hands in the pockets of your cargo pants, and continue to walk, watching and hearing bits of conversation from Tess and Ellie.

“I thought you were some sort of’ performer, a singer maybe, with all that hummin’ you were doin’ awhile ago.”

That catches you off guard and you feel the confusion form on your face and you begin to feel your face feel warm, “What?” Joel continues, “You were hummin’ to Linda Ronstadt, right? Haven’t heard that song in a while.” You stared at him in complete disbelief, “You heard me humming?”

As he was about to reply, you and him managed to catch up to Ellie and Tess to overhear their conversation, “How old are you?” Ellie replies, “Fourteen.” Tess hums and smirks at the kid, “Wow. Well, I mean you got some balls on you, sister.”

“Thanks,” Ellies says and follows after Tess, climbing over the flipped rusted car. You follow their movements and Joel does too.

Tess curiously looks over her shoulder at Ellie and continues her walk forward, “Nobody is gonna come after you, right? Like Mom, Dad, boyfriend?”

“I’m an orphan, and, uh, no.” Ellie takes a look around her surroundings and lets her hand brush on the tall grass growing from the cracks of the pavement, “Everyone said the open city was crazy. Like, swarms of infected running around everywhere.”

Joel humors her, “Not exactly like that.” Tess smiles, “You know people like to tell stories.”

“So there aren’t super-infected that explode fungus spores on you?” Ellie curiously asks with a somewhat happy tone, as if all of this doesn’t scare her. Fearless is what you conclude, a trait that could be good when at its best but dangerous and reckless at its worse. “Shit, I hope not,” Tess says.

“Or ones with split-open heads that see in the dark like bats?” Ellie asks and that causes a shift in Tess, Joel, and your demeanor. Fucking clickers. And on queue, you hear the screeching of the devil’s spawn in the distance. The whole group stills and Ellie shakily asks, “What was that?”

Joel doesn’t reply, instead, he just says, “Let’s keep movin’.”

Joel pushes the doors of the hotel open, loudly shrieking as he does, and all three of you are greeted with the sight of the flooded hotel. It was almost swamp-like due to the green water, lily pads floating, and the ducks and frogs swimming.

Ellie takes a spin and looks at the view with a childlike wonder you wish you still had, “You’ve got to be kidding me! You ever stay in a place like this?” “Uh, no, a little out of our league.” Tess says and Joel looks at Ellie and asks, “How do you even know what this is?” Being the smartass that she throws him a look and says, “Have you heard of books?”

You chuckle as Joel shakes his head and walks down into the murky water, “Wait we’re going in there?” Ellie asks, and Tess nods, “Yeah, we gotta get to the stairwell on the other side.” The kid takes a step back, “Well, I don’t… I don’t know how to swim.” Joel lifts an eyebrow, “Seriously?”

“Do you think we have pools in the QZ?” Ellie says with narrowed eyes. “No, smart-ass. I mean…”, Joel does a little jump into the water, it does a small splash when he does. “I don’t know how I was supposed to know that,” Ellie says as she walks down the steps and into the water, you follow behind her and Tess.

You four wade through the green murky water, “This is so gross.” Ellie says with a huge smile on her face and you can’t help but laugh, “This is disgusting.” The fourteen-year-old spots the concierge desk and makes her way over, “Oh, check it out!”

You place both of your hands on your hips and watch her mess with the call bell, “Ding, ding.” She begins to do her form of roleplay for her entertainment and to cure her boredom, “Yes sir. I would like your finest suite, please.”

“Yes, ma’am. Would you like me to take your luggage?”, she proceeds to answer her own question and pushes the hotel bell cart through the water, “Yes, ma’am. Right away ma’am…”

“You’re a weird kid.” Joel states, Ellie turns her head to look at him, “You’re a weird kid.” Something falls over, a sloshing sound indicating that it had fallen in front of Ellie causing her to jump back and bang the piano behind her and yelp, “Oh, fuck!”

You and Joel are quick to come to her side to see what it was. A skeleton lay there unmoving and rotten, your eyes raise to look at Ellie panting and clutching onto the hotel bell cart, “Oh, my god.” Joel kicks the skull and the kid mumbles, “Uh, sorry.”

Joel offers his hand to help Ellie back up and the sound of the honky-tonk piano creates sharp notes as she stands, Joel pulls back his hand once Ellie can manage on her own and begins to walk away.

You look to Joel, “How’s the hand?” He looks down at it as it shakes again, “It’ll heal.” Your face forms a frown and you shake your head, “That doesn’t answer my question.” Joel doesn’t respond and decides to continue and you simply follow.

“You okay?” Tess asks Ellie, and the young girl wades through the water like nothing happened, “Yep. Fucking Fabulous.”

After ten flights of stairs you finally made it to the top floor, Joel goes through the doorway first, while Tess takes a moment to catch her breath, “Fuck. Holy shit.”

You’re a little breathless, but not as much as Tess since you were a bit younger than her. “Come on, it wasn’t that bad.” Ellie says teasingly and Tess shoots her a look, “You try climbing ten fuckin’ floors with our knees. See how you feel.”

You turn right to a hallway, to see a giant obstruction made out of the rubble, “Well, when the fuck did that happen?” Tess tries to push the door to her right, only to be blocked. You try to check the door to the left to find the same outcome, you sigh “No.”

“All right, well, I mean, maybe I could climb up there. Work my way around and open it from the inside?” Ellie peers around the rocks, “Uh, no. Well, I’m the smallest, so it’d be easier for me to get through.” Tess hums, “But you die and we get nothing. You stay.”

“I could help.” You say a little meek, Tess is a little intimidating and you feel so out of place like you’re intruding. Technically, you aren’t supposed to be in this mess. She takes a good look at you and says, “Yeah, no.”

You deflate a little and avoid trying to argue, Tess turns to Joel and asks for help, “Can you give me a hand?” Joel pulls back Ellie with the strap of her backpack and she sighs, then Joel tugs your jacket sleeve to do the same. Your face warms a little bit, it’s the first time he’s ever touched you.

Joel boosts up Tess over the pile of rubble and she climbs over, “You good up there?” Tess analyzes the mess she needs to clean up and replies, “Yeah. It’s a bit of a mess, so I’m gonna need a few minutes.”

Joel turns around to face you and Ellie, he adjusts his gun and lets his back slide against the wall to sit down across from both of you. Ellie has her arms resting on her knees while you decide to sit comfortably cross-legged.

Ellie takes out her knife and decides to play with it, tossing it in her hands as if it were just a pen and not something that could easily cut her if she commits a mistake. You watch everything play out just like it did in the episode—character development.

“Nice knife,” Joel says as his eyes follow the movement of Ellie’s tossing. She only glances at him with acknowledgment. “Where’d you learn to do that?” he asks, you gotta hand it to him for trying to make an effort.

She replies with a monotone voice, “The circus.”

Joel looks away exasperated and completely done with her bullshit. You try and hide your smile, but the slight crease in your eyes gives away your amusement. Ellie folds her knife, and as Joel sighs, the kid decides to give an olive branch, “Where are you from?”

“Texas.” He replies, and Ellie continues, “What about Tess?”

“Detroit. It’s in Michigan.”

If there’s anything she hated most, was the fact people underestimate her intelligence, she rolls her eyes and Ellie’s reply comes out harsh, “I go to school. I know where Detroit is.”

Her response causes a wave of silence between the three of you. Your eyes drift from Joel to Ellie, she then decides it’s your turn to be interrogated, “Are you from the future?”

Your mouth twists a little to the right before deciding on a good enough answer, “Sort of? Your technology stopped advancing in 2003, so, I guess I am?” This piques her interest, “So, what’s it like over there?”

You pick the dirt off the underside of your fingernails, a little nervous, or if not nervous then cautious, as you respond, “Almost the same. Our technology is way different though.”

“Different how?” She asks.

You give her a soft smile and respond, “Well, for starters, we have touch screens for phones, laptops, tablets, you name it, it probably has a touch screen.”

“No way,” Ellie says with her eyes full of amazement and wonder, “What else?”

You give a hum as you teasingly tell her, “I don’t know… it might blow your tiny little mind.” She blows a raspberry in your face and you stick your tongue out in retaliation.

“Come on! Wait, you said we were just characters in some kind of story?” She says dramatically and tugs the sleeve of your jacket and continues, “What did you mean by that?”

Your eyes shift to look at Joel, who has his full attention on you; simply waiting. You blink owlishly at him, once, then twice before settling on a response, “Yeah, um, it recently aired.”

“So, do you know the future? Like our future? What’s about to happen? Will we be able to make a cure or a vaccine?” You couldn’t keep up with her rapid questions, and your mouth slightly parts open. Should you tell them?

Can you change the fact Tess is practically minutes away from death? That Joel is about to make the worst mistake of his life? That Bill and Frank are… that they…

Luckily, you didn’t need to answer Ellie, Joel who senses your unease, steps in for you, “Ellie, stop askin’ her about her life, she doesn’t wanna give anythin’ up.” You look at him apologetically and shut your eyes for a while. This migraine keeps bothering you, a sharp, heavy, thump in the side of your brain hasn’t gone away. You tell yourself that it eventually will. Maybe.

Ellie focuses her attention back to Joel, “So you two like a…”

“Pass.” He says.

Ellie continues, “How’d you end up in Boston?”

“Pass. No more questions about me.” Ellie rolls her eyes at him and racks her brain for a different question, “How long do infected live?” Joel mocks Ellie in reply, “Oh, I thought you went to school.”

“It’s a really shitty one.” She snarkily replies. You smile at their banter with your eyes closed, enjoying the conversation that they have going on. Joel thinks for a moment before answering her, “Well, some last about a month or two. But there’s other’s been walkin’ about 20 years.”

Ellie fidgets with her knife again, “You ever kill one?”

You hear the slight sorrow in his voice, “Yeah, I’ve killed lots of them.” Ellie asks the most human question as she looks at the older man, “Was it hard? Like, knowing they were people once?”

You open your eyes to watch his gaze look away from the kid, memories come back to him, what he’s done and will continue to do, and he nods, “Sometimes.”

“What about that guy last night?” She asks, and you frown while he gives Ellie a stern look. You knew Ellie liked the fact Joel hurt the FEDRA guard to protect her. She loved it. Luckily Joel doesn’t have to respond, you could hear the sound of something approaching you. The loyalist immediately stands up, and you and Ellie get up to stand next to Joel, he puts his finger to the trigger of his gun, ready to protect you both from whatever is out there.

“You can put the gun down, Joel,” Tess calls out from a distance, and a tingle of jealousy moves through your bones like electricity. She knew him so well, to the point where she knew what he was going to do before doing it. They both loved each other without admitting it, and it hurts you. They never stood a chance.

You hear the quiet rumble of Tess pushing away the debris to open the door, the loud creak of metal reveals her face, and it’s full of worry. Joel reads her like a book, “What now?” Then Tess nods her head, signaling to follow her.

As you make your way upstairs, you take notice of the abandoned wine glass and dishes, the dust that coats every inch of the hotel, and the fallen chairs. Tess pulls back a plastic curtain for you and Ellie to walk through, only to be greeted by the view of hundreds of infected down below.

“There’s so many,” Ellie comments in disbelief, you can hear the cries and wailing of each Runner as they roll and crawl. The young girl leans a little forward to get a better view. Tess nods, “The last time we were here they were still deep inside the buildings. Then I guess enough people came through looking for the QZ they went inside seeking shelter, and that’s how they get more and more of the city bit by city year after year.”

As the clouds pass by, the sun shines through a little, overwhelming light shines over the infected, they screech and roll away, like a domino effect. “They’re connected,” Ellie says, and Tess nods in confirmation, “More than you know. The fungus also grows underground. Long fibers like wires, some of them stretching over a mile.”

If you weren’t so focused on listening to Tess explain the cordyceps, you would have felt Joel staring at you the whole time, observing how you were taking all of the information being shared. You were surprisingly calm, despite the fact zombies are now real and you could die. And possibly a little worried like you were anticipating something bad was going to happen.

Tess continues, “Now you step on a patch of cordyceps in one place and you can wake a dozen infected from somewhere else. Now they know where you are, now they come. You’re not immune from being ripped apart. You understand? It’s important. I’m trying to keep you alive.”

Ellie nods and you do too, even if the question wasn’t directed at you. “So we’re not going that way.” She states, and Tess agrees, “No.”

“What do we do then? Short way?” Ellie asks and Joel looks at Tess, and speaks the dreaded words you’ve heard before, “Museum.”

A/N: Trust me, I’m working double time on the next one if this is received well :,) Thank you for reading! See ya in the next chapter <3

Next Chapter ->

#joel miller x y/n #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x poc!reader #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal #tlou #tlou remake #tlou rewrite #tlou series #joel miller x reader series #joel miller x reader tlou #tlouhbo #the last of us rewrite #joel miller x modern reader #joel miller x reader au

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peterparkersnose · 2 years ago

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Sacrificial

pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader

word count: 1.7k

warnings: near death experience, angst, descriptions of weaponds and shooting, swearing, self sacrificing, not really but sort of make out sesh at the end

a/n pedro as joel has me in such a chokehold its not even funny anymore

summary Y/N and Joel are sweeping out an abandoned hotel and come into some trouble

masterlist

join the tag list

read time: 6 mins 32 seconds

The screams of infected kept getting louder and louder as you and Joel went down the hallway.

“Elevator?” you whispered, looking at the gaping hole where one used to stand. Joel shrugged and followed you towards the opened elevator doors.

You were right. At the bottom a few floors down, the elevator shaft was filled with infected. The shouts only got louder as you peeked your head dangerously over the side. The runners tried to climb up the clickers to reach you, but to no avail.

“Maybe,” you began, looking up. The abandoned elevator sat another few floors up, the rope hanging loose in the middle.

You reached for your knife and held on to the old entrance doors, balancing on the stable ground with just barely one foot.

“Jesus!” he yelled as the view of you holding on by a few fingers trying to cut the elevator rope startled him.

His booming voice startled you and made you loose your balance. And down you began to fall. The starving infected we’re about to get the best feast of their lives.

Without hesitation Joel leaped in after you. He grabbed the rope extending from the elevator above. He didn’t care if it wasn’t stable, he didn’t care to check. He couldn’t let you die.

Everything went so quickly but yet so slow. The visual of you falling would burn in his mind forever. He didn’t care whether he lived or died; you just had to be okay.

Your braids were not catching up with gravity and floating in front of your face. How your hands flailed upwards begging to live. The screech of the monsters down below excited for their next victim. The look of absolute terror on your face. And it was all his fault.

His hands began to burn but he hadn’t realized it yet. The rope took the blunder of his weight. He slid down it quickly, his other hand extending out for yours.

The sight of Joel jumping after you didn’t recognize in your brain until you grabbed his hand. One hand grabbed his and the other grabbed the rope. You felt a hand grab your shoe and realized how close you were to the end. Joel began to pull you up slowly. You tucked your legs up, releasing the runner from your foot.

Joel grunted as he pulled your weight up. He wasn’t sure if the elevator could take much more. Without a second thought, he threw you on the floor below through its open elevator doors. You hit the ground hard with a thud.

“Fuck!” he yelled in frustration. “You alright?” he called out to you. No answer.

Joel’s grip was beginning to weaken. Slowly, he inched down the rope and prayed his old arms would hold out. They were already starting to burn. His worrying came to an end when he began to hear bullets firing. Joel flung himself through the same elevator doors you just had been thrown through moments ago to find runners speeding at him from the other side of the hallway.

His back collided with yours as you took the brunt of the infected coming your way. Quickly, his revolver did it’s job. Five lay dead in a row on his side, eight on yours.

The two of you stood back to back in shock. The rush was over. You turned around the same time he did. Joel grabbed you and held you tighter than he ever thought he could. He didn’t even question this sudden burst of affection. It was very unusual though. He needed to know that you were you and you were still here. Making sure it wasn’t some sick twisted dream. You both lived.

Tears began to well in your eyes. Both of you were breathing hard. Nausea kicked in from the whole event making you slip out of his embrace. You sat on the ground, knees to your chest hoping the stillness would end your sickness.

The silence was almost deafening besides the disappointed infected still at the bottom of the elevator shaft.

Joel sighed at the growls. He promptly took out his machete and cut the rope that saved both of your lives. You wish you could have un heard the squishing of the stupid horde that fell down the elevator shaft.

He could feel all his rage coming back. It was so easy. Why couldn’t you have just waited for him?

“Next time your about to do somethin’ stupid, ask me first,” he grunted, using all the rest of his force to close the abandoned elevator doors.

Joel offered his hand out to you. You accepted it, and started following him ahead of you. You we’re definitely sure he was pissed at you. He was right. How careless could you have been? The satisfying squish of the monsters wasn’t as satisfying as you thought it was going to be. It wasn’t worth risking your life.

You had to be more careful.

The lobby of the hotel came into view. The grand staircase that was once covered in gold paint was full of water damage and mud. A nice branch of dead cordyceps sprawled up the side of the wall. If you tried hard enough, you could imagine the glamor it had in it’s day.

Joel was going through the front desk as you sat down in one of the chairs. It had a red pattern that seemed expensive. You flicked away a piece of gold paint that was peeling off the arm rest.

“Could you maybe get up and help?” Joel yelled, not even facing to look you.

“Let me rest,” you sighed, eyes closed with a hand on your forehead.

“I just saved your damn life. Come help.”

Groaning like an angry teenager, you left the comfy chair and started going through the filing cabinet.

“Cloth,” you sighed, shoving the material in your backpack.

“You find anything good?” you asked Joel, going through boring papers. He grunted back at you. “Thanks,” you whispered to yourself.

“Fuckin’ score,” you yelled, yanking the half empty bottle of alcohol out from behind the files. Joel turned and grabbed it quickly out of your hands.

“The hell was that for?” you asked, hands on your hips. “Not for drinkin’. Molotov’s,”

“You’ve really got to be a downer for everything, don’t you?”

“Well, when my partner is a complete idiot I’m always the one who has to be responsible.”

“Idiot? I was trying to come up with a way to efficiently kill those infected. Your the one who startled me!” you yelled back. His face scrunched as he turned away from you.

“I saved your ass,” he seethed through his teeth. “Yeah? Well I never asked you to!” “Would you had rather be eaten alive by those… things? Huh? I don’t think so. Shut your mouth and help me find a way out of here.”

You felt the muscles in your face droop more than usual. Why did he always have to be so mean? I mean yes, the elevator incident wasn’t your proudest moment. But what did you do to deserve this kind of treatment?

Joel pushed on the boarded up main entrance but to no avail. “Boarded up, dip shit.” you sneered at him. You saw his shoulders rise and fall, satisfied by how you were getting to him.

Joel slammed himself against the door once again. It didn’t open, but the hold against the wall flooded open on the opposite side of the lobby. Runners fled out towards the both of you.

“Fuck!” Joel yelled, looking for another way out. You grabbed your rifle and started shooting. After the first few bullets you realized you were outnumbered.

“I’m out Y/N!” Joel yelled, flicking open his revolver.

“Rope!” you yelled and grabbed Joel’s arm. A rope was thrown over the bannister to the second level.

“Go, go!” Joel yelled. You were confused on why he wasn’t following you to the other side of the lobby.

He was sacrificing himself.

“Jesus Joel, fucking move!” you yelled, pulling on the rope to make sure it was sturdy. He looked back at you and gave you one last sincere look.

“Not time to play the martyr, Miller!”

Not today. Joel Miller had faced death too many times and lived. Today was not going to be the day he would let death win. You had to make sure of that.

You ran towards him and towards the runners coming at you. Joel had killed a few with his knife already, but he had already accepted his fate.

“Leave!” he yelled as you reached him. Panic spread over his face. You laced your hand in his and ran. He had no choice but to follow you. If he didn’t he was sure his fingers would break. Your grip on him was so tight.

“Move!” you yelled, handing him the rope. “Y/N,” he whispered. “I didn’t ask! FUCKING MOVE!” you shouted at him. Your throat began to burn because of how forceful you spoke. You used your rifle and shot a few more. Another fifteen easily were erupting from the blocked off room.

“Gimme your hand!” Joel yelled, reaching out his. You pulled up as your feet met the wall. Joel pulled you over the bannister.

His body collapsed on top of yours. You felt the same spark you did as he held you just moments before. His old soul peered into your eyes with a look of utter relief.

And in the moment of pure passion and anger he kissed you without a second thought.

His touch was so forceful and filled with passion. If he wasn't careful, his teeth would have collided with yours. His body pressed down on yours as a slight moan came from your lips. You didn’t care about his dry lips, the stench of the hotel, the yelling of the runners below you or the fact that the two of you had almost died too many times for a lifetime in one day. You cared about the man who you had been longing for, for years had finally caved. All the arguing, all the ignorance and fighting had been coded with passion. The little things you thought you were making up in your head about him had all been true. He cared about you.

Joel realized his weight might have been hard on your fragile figure. He carefully placed his hand behind your head and scooped you up into his embrace. The kiss finally separated. You tried your best not to look desperate for air, but you wanted right back to where you just were.

“Hold on, hold on.” Joel muttered, unashamed of his lack of air. “I’m not as young as I used to be.” he chuckled.

He sat against the wall with your legs straddling him. You sat back on his legs with one of your hands wrapped around his shoulders.

“Jesus Joel, what took you so long?” you finally asked. Joel shrugged. “I didn’t want to make things weird.”

Your mind raced back to all the time you two had spent together. Had he always felt like this?

You leaned in again and he took you gracefully. Your smile dissolved into his lips. His hands travelled to your waist as your hair tickled his face. He didn’t have much to compare it to, but holy shit. You were the best kisser he had ever met. He had never felt so passionately about a person, not even back in the real world.

He heard the familiar scratches of a runner. The damn thing had began to climb the wall. Joel pulled away and sighed.

You, confused, sat back and was about to ask for an explanation. Joel swiftly look your handgun from your belt out of your holster and shot the runner just as his head popped up over the bannister.

“Uninvited company,” he sarcastically said. “Wouldn’t want to ruin such a good time, huh?” he asked, cupping your cheeks and delving back into your kiss.

all posts @dani5216 @uwiuwi @alohastyles-x @samanthacookieone @maddieinnit0 @alexxavicry @scoliobean

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kurithedweeb · 3 months ago

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An idea I had last night: Jacob survives.

So, instead of the amulet just making everyone drop dead, we're going with the curse being a plague. (Thank you @irenes-journal for turning the plague amulet idea into what it is today.)

In canon, the amulet kills everyone save the person holding it, so the plague amulet would theoretically grant one person immunity, or at least resistance. How it grants some kind of immunity/resistance is by releasing antibodies for the plague, slowly at first to acclimatize the body a bit before it floods the system, and Jacob got some of the antibodies before he gave it to Aaron.

He was the first to fall ill, and he took twice as long to succumb to the illness than anyone else infected did. The town doctor died before Jacob did, so when he fell into a coma that looked a whole lot like death, he was mistaken for dead.

Lily was barely holding on herself at this point, and Aaron came back from burying the day's dead to find his wife and son dead in Jacob's room. Lily worshipped Menphia and some minor gods, being from Tu'la, and raised Jacob to do the same since Aaron's side of the family doesn't worship any recognized religion (Ultima stuff is for later), and there was a small tomb previously made for when Lily and her children died according to Tu'lan burial practices. Which gives Jacob some more time than he'd have in a grave to get out before he runs out of air.

Aaron goes on burying bodies and surveying the sick while he mourns his own family's loss. Jacob wakes up maybe a day or two later in the dark with what remains of Lily. Obviously, he freaks out, crying out for help, and no one comes. Fueled by adrenalin and fear, he manages to open the tomb door just enough for him to squeeze through, and he finds the streets covered in graves. He has no idea what's going on, no clue how long it's been, but he runs home and his dad's not there and all the streets he's run down are empty and stinking of rot. He needs his dad to not be dead, so he comes up with this idea that obviously Aaron thought he was dead like everyone else and left.

And so Jacob packs a bag and sets out to leave Falconclaw, and he leaves barely an hour before Aaron gets home. They just miss each other.

Jacob isn't well. He collapses on the road and wakes up in a merchant caravan bound for some village way North. He asks if any of them have seen his father, says he's the son of the Lord of Falconclaw, and one of the mercenaries hired to guard the caravan sees an opportunity. By the time the caravan reaches its destination, Aaron is already in O'khasis being groomed by Zane to become a Juror.

Jacob is snatched off the street by the same mercenaries who were guarding the caravan and sold to someone visiting from Tu'la, and he winds up a servant boy for one of the king's vassal clans. Maybe Nana's, maybe the one his mother escaped from. The plague left him incredibly scarred, so for a long time he's a faceless, bandaged figure in the shadows of the house, all this anger and frustration building up inside him at not being able to figure out a way home, until one day the master of the house thinks it'd be funny to match a servant boy against one of his soldier-apprentices.

And Jacob wins. No training, having thrown away his weapon and beaten the other boy with his bare hands until they were dripping in blood. He's sent to the gladiator pits, maybe the same ones Liochant grew up in, and as long as he has his anger he dominates. His contract is bought by some wealthy noble with a penchant for collecting pretty, broken things, and on the road he kills them and flees into the night.

By the time he gets back to O'khasis, Aaron's time on the Jury is over and he's disappeared completely, having forsaken his own name and become The Stranger. This is when Jacob finally hears about, finally confirms, the fall of Falconclaw. He goes to Zianna, waiting for her to be out in town before he approaches her. She and his mother considered themselves sisters, once, and Zianna had been an excellent spy in Tu'la, if anyone would help him it'd be her. All Zianna has to give him is rumors, but anything is better than nothing.

He takes it, he thanks her, he goes on the road trying to find his father, and gets waylaid a bunch on the way by saving people and taking out the mercenary company that sold him to that Tu'lan visitor and into years of servitude and gladiator rings. He had a number of names in Tu'la, but he goes back to the name from a lifetime ago, introducing himself everywhere he goes as Jacob Lycan, son of Aaron Lycan, last Lord of Falconclaw, in an effort to see if his father will be drawn to the man using his son's name. By the time he makes it all the way around to Phoenix Drop, it's the middle of the Irene Dimension time skip, and since no one knew who The Stranger was or ever really saw his face, they don't realize that that's exactly who Jacob is looking for.

He goes back to Falconclaw, thinking maybe he can find some clues where this all started. It's practically the same as he left it since everyone thinks the land is extremely cursed, and in looking through their home he finds books on the teaching of his father's faith. He fits his father's old clothes, his old faith. He takes whatever he cares to keep from the Lycan estate and visits Lily's tomb before he leaves, and not a day later he comes across Abby, who's taken to the road hoping to find a lead on the woman she believes killed her father, Lady Katelyn the Firefist, who disappeared without a trace years ago about the same time High Priest Zane Ro'Meave and a few other Jurors did. She and Jacob agree to help each other and become good friends, and eventually they round back to Phoenix Drop.

A week after Aaron died.

Jacob introduces Abby first, notes that the Lord, or maybe she's the Lord's mother, seems to know who Abby is, and then he introduces himself. As Jacob Lycan, son of Aaron Lycan, last Lord of Falconclaw. And the look on this Lord's face is indescribable. She asks to speak with Jacob alone.

She tells him about his father in the last part of his life. She tells him how he saved her several times, taught her to fight, saved her guards, those two over there. That one he sacrificed himself for just last week, when he saved the man from another realm and finally got vengeance for his family and village. How he once said that when his journey was done, when he had taken the life of the man who cursed them all, he would finally be at peace with his wife and son.

Then there's a child's cry, and suddenly Jacob is being introduced to two little girls who his father helped raise. To his sisters.

He can't even process it properly before he hears Abby scream, and suddenly he is running to pull her off a blue-haired woman and holding her, thrashing and spitting vitriol, yelling how she thought of Katelyn like her mother, as Katelyn explains what really happened that day, and everything Abby has been keeping inside her for years spills out in wave after wave of tears. She clings to Jacob, and he finds himself crying too. If only they had known the truth earlier.

If they'd only learned the truth earlier, Abby wouldn't have spent so long hating an innocent woman she once adored, and Jacob could have seen his father again. Maybe if he'd known Aaron was The Stranger, if he'd known to wait in Phoenix Drop, Aaron would be alive. He would have had his son to live for.

They can't make themselves stay there once they know the truth. They're not ready. Abby tells Katelyn she'll be back to catch up later, and Jacob tells the Lord he'd like to meet his sisters another time, and with Jacob's quest over they go to hunt the Jury of Nine for Jeffory Goldenheart.

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impossiblesuitcase · 6 months ago

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do you have any head cannons on Kai’s mom? It’s just one of those things where I soooo wish that MM went into more detail. I feel as though we were robbed.

I know 😭😭Marissa killed her off and never had the decency to tell us anything about her.

I have a few headcanons about her. As I mentioned in one of my fics, I think that she came from Japan, hence Kai having a Japanese name. She was from a rich family but not aristocrats and they weren't great supporters of the monarchy. Many provinces in the Commonwealth have bubbles of anti-monarchal sentiment. She and Rikan met when he visited Japan and began a long-distance relationship. After a few years she moved to New Beijing and married him, something her parents weren't fond of. They lived in Japan and rarely visit Kai for this reason, which is why they are absent during the series.

Because she came from a slightly lower social class than her husband, she lived a more normal lifestyle. She cooked her own meals, would go shopping for herself rather than having servants do it, and took a real interest in all the staff in the palace. It's where Kai learnt this from. Marissa wrote a brief description of her from Kai's perspective: "Going to the Annual Peace Festival when I was growing up [was when I was the happiest]. We would go every year as a family...Mom always found a way to sneak in a few private moments. Just the three of us, eating spicy noodles from the street vendors and watching the musicians practice for the parade." Kai also says in The Mechanic that she would take him to the market, so she evidently went against the norms and protocols for royalty to give Kai a more normal upbringing. Very Princess Diana of her.

Because she was a rule-breaker, I think it would be funny if she and Torin did not get along. She encouraged a looser side from Rikan which was at odds with Torin's perfectly constructed regimen for the emperor. But eventually he warmed up to her, and part of the reason he warms up to Cinder is because she reminds him of the late empress.

I like to think that Kai got his cheekier side from her. She would make jokes from tough situations and that helped Kai process his emotions. She also inspired his penchant for the impossible (conspiracy theories) and his hopeless romantic heart by reading many fairytales to him as a child.

But of course every character has flaws, so I think that she was more of a philanthropist than a lawmaker. She died while on a diplomatic mission to the infected areas, so her heart was clearly on helping people. However she wasn't quite aggressive enough to help with the legislative side of things, so Rikan was mostly on his own in that regard.

Finally, I think that Cinder and Kai have a daughter who looks a lot like her. Kai loves seeing a piece of his mother still with them and the people adore the reminder of their last empress in the empress-to-be.

#the lunar chronicles #lunar chronicles #tlc #emperor kai #prince kai #linh cinder #emperor rikan

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lets-try-some-writing · 7 months ago

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I got this thought of Titan Mars.. How that would work no clue but it's funny and interesting. This titan . Just watching the trio and others from distance, avoiding all this nonsense that's happening not wanting to deal with any of it.. He's chilling (keeping his em field tight not utterrng a sound) with it's rovers humans occasionally send that he quickly adopts(theres around.. 21 mars rovers?)

Basically old lady with cats but in this case titan with drones

Well, guess its time for lore.

Following the death of the Predacons, many of the Titans who survived chose to go immersant rather than get involved with the world when the Quintessons came. But Mars and a few others were blatant exceptions. They saw the situation and had a few choices to make. They could either join their brethren in death, serve as colony ships and colonize new worlds with their citizens, or take a chance and flee.

Mars originally intended to become a colony vessel, but his citizens died to a serious bought of the rust plague halfway through the journey. He tried his very best to save them, but the plague was serious enough to threaten his systems. And so in a true act of love for their Titan, his citizens abandoned his frame and chose to die quietly on a nearby world. It was their way of saving his life since they knew he would gladly die alongside them.

A father never abandons his children. Mars's citizens knew this and made their choice accordingly. Mars was still infected, but the plague was localized on his plating, giving him his rusty outward appearance. He has never bothered to repair the outward damage. He sees it as a living memorial to his beloved citizens.

Following the death of his citizens, he remembered Moon. He and Moon were born of the same Hotspot. Moon was older, but Mars looked up to him. They were close enough to develop a faint Amica bond before Moon fled. It was through the use of this bond that Mars followed his fellow Titan all the way to young Earth. He promptly took one look at the situation and Moon's possessiveness and came to a solid conclusion.

He couldn't exactly leave the Unmaker unobserved, but he also had no desire to fight Moon over... whatever was going on over there. As such, Mars settled in the solar system, took on a planetary alt mode, and opted to sleep most of his life away while keeping a vague optic on whatever was going on with the trio.

He has never had an end to the tea, and upon being sent a few rovers from Earth, he fully supports Moon's attempts to keep Earth for himself. Earth is a fantastic sister in law. Look! She gave him citizens! Well technically her children did that, but it means a lot to Mars all the same. He never gets involved with the drama, but he will sure as pit watch it all burn from a distance and maybe step in if Moon were to be truly threatened.

Mars is totally fine chilling with his gifted citizens to observe it all from a safe distance. He is eternally thankful that the Cybertronian visitors to Earth straight up missed him. He wouldn't want them knowing he's been trying to give his citizens true sentience and succeeding.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #unicron #earth #moon #mars #unicron and earth au #alternate universe #tf titans

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haunteddeertimetravel · 1 year ago

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CREEPYPASTA HEADCANNONS

Okay so this is going to be just a few characters to start with, but I will definitely make a part two which has more characters!!

(This post includes Jeff the Killer, Ben Drowned, Eyeless Jack, Laughing Jack, Ticci Toby, Homicidal Liu)

(Also don't get mad at me for this post. ITS MY OPINION and you do NOT have to agree with it)

Jeff the Killer

• Okay so Jeff fans are WILD so please don't kill me if I say something you don't agree with☠️

• He is really proud of his new face. (I always see people say he is insecure of it but it's stated in his story that he thinks it's beautiful)

• He re cuts his face everytime it TRIES to re-heal

• His face cuts are VERY infected

• He isn't exactly close with anyone in the mansion but he gets along with Toby the most

• May act like he doesn't but he really does regret what he did to Liu

• Has attachment issues after what happened with Liu (he lost him and he was so close with him

• Definitely listens to old good Charlotte, all time low, and maybe even some never shout never

• Has bad trust issues

• Gets mad very easily

Ben Drowned

• Is pretty childish since he was 12 when he died and never really got the chance to mature

• Is close with sally (even though it took her a while to get used to any male presence and she still hates it) and they prank people together

• He loves Apple juice (idk why I think this😭)

• He does stuff to purposely annoy people such as poking them over and over again

• when he gets mad he side eyes people and tells them to shut up

• You will hear him raging at random times at night because he lost in a video game

• I think he gets more annoyed than he does mad like he will roll his eyes if someone is irritating him

• Sassy 12 year old

• Is OBSESSED with Halloween because he loves the way people in the mansion celebrate (some of them go outside in their normal outfits and trick or treat just to bring home candy for the younger ones of the house. Since they all look like they are in a costume)

• I know this is super stereotypical but he definitely listens to hyperpop since it replicates computer-typeish music and tones

Eyeless Jack

• He doesn't have eyes, but HE CAN SEE

• Sometimes when he is out of kidneys and is hungry but doesn't feel like hunting, he will teleport to hospitals and use his invisibility skills to take kidneys from transplant sections (if that's what they are called)

• He still feels human emotions but just has a hard time expressing them since he wants to forget his past

• Has SEVERE trust issues and it would be shocking if he EVER trusted a human again

• Feels sympathy for Ben (if we are talking about the Benjamin Lawman sacrifice story) since he was also killed/sacrificed by a cult

• Don't get me wrong he loves killing/torturing humans, but sometimes he only wants a kidney and when they wake up he dreads it

• Is VERY quiet and polite (when around other creepypastas obviously) and doesn't really say much

• I feel like he definitely listens to 2014 music that you would hear on road trips (example: Safe and sound - capital cities, am I wrong - Nico and Vinz etc.)

Laughing Jack

• Is TERRIFYINGLY TALL. APPROXIMATELY 8 FEET TALL. Scary

• I weirdly feel like he sounds like tiny tim and pennywise combined

• Definitely thinks everything is funny since he used to be an actual clown and still hasn't forgotten those ways fully

• Listens to old classical music and 1920s-40s music such as tonight you belong to me - patience and prudence, and livin in the sunlight lovin in the moonlight - Tiny Tim

• Ben always try to prank him and he gets mad because he feels like he should be the one pranking

• Extremely scary and quiet most of the time, but he has very frequent mood swings that could have him jumping off the walls (literally) to just sitting on the floor staring

• Doesn't get along with anyone in the mansion except for Candy Pop and Jason the Toymaker

• Doesn't sleep and only eats the organs he pulls out of his victims

• Hates Issac because he basically turned him into this monster

• Has abandonment issues severely

• Is definitely claustrophobic ever since he had to be in that box for that long period of time

• Has a wind up thing on his back and he will play music (since he is a jack in the box and also a stuffed doll)

Ticci Toby

• Does NOT like waffles

• Is NOT an "UwU smol bean"

• hates being treated like he is less just because he is a proxy

• Likes to be alone because it can be a struggle for him to communicate due to his tourettes (not saying they can't communicate just saying it can come as a struggle when talking to someone new because of stress and anxiety which is a trigger for most people)

• Has bad abandonment issues

•Will absolutely REFUSE to kill anyone who resembles his sister in the slightest unless slenderman tells him to (proxies can not refuse slender)

• He loves fall and nature and loves to see the leaves turn green to gold

• Wears a lot of sweaters (this is kind of canon)

• Doesn't really get along with anyone in the mansion except for Jeff since they both like to complain about stuff

• It's harder for him to feel human emotions since proxies kind of have all of that erased

• Is quiet and when people talk to him he kind of just nods and shakes his head in response to what they say instead of talking back

• Listens to old Owl City and All Time Low

• NOT emo😭 (I always see people say he is...)

• Everytime he sees a car he thinks of Lyra and has a mental breakdown. Anything he sees that remind him of her he can't deal with

• LOVES RACCOONS!!!!

• Definitely got bitten by a stray raccoon because he tried to pet it

Homicidal Liu

• He forgives Jeff even though he basically ruined his life

• Is very peaceful and kind of came to terms with all that happened

• Very quiet and laid back

• Doesn't like loud people/places

• Hates conflict since it reminds him of that day the fighting happened

• Has EXTREME trust issues since him and Jeff were so close and he just decided to attempt to murder him while he was sleeping on the couch

• I have a feeling him and bloody painter get along since they share a couple of traits that are needed

• But all of this changes when he turns into Sully it's a WHOLE different story then

• Loves Christmas and winter

Hello guys!! That's all I have today but I will definitely make more parts with more characters! I apologize for how long it took me to make this I have had school and SO much more boring daily life shit☠️ I hope you all have a good day!!! <33

I'm also 100% willing to do marble hornets and every man hybrid head cannons but I WILL include them in the creepypasta section!! I do know that they are not creepypastas I just like the headcannon that they all live in the mansion together 😭

#creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta #laughing jack #homicidal liu #jeff the killer #ticci toby #ben drowned #eyeless jack #slenderman #proxies #creepypasta fandom

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celtrist · 5 days ago

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I thought about it as more of proximity thing, and place furthest from Hell in afterlife is Heaven. It also allows rest of Hell function more or less normally as long as they are far away from Alastor, because effect of the curse then is so small it's negligible. Sinners are more affected as are imps that live in Pride Ring cause Alastor is there, but most affected are those who see and interact with him frequently. So Adam and exorcists may not develop the obsession up until they meet him, and then Adam gets swiftly stomped to death because for once those affected by curse are working together. And the fan club could be those that couldn't for any reason fly back into the portal and got stuck in Hell

Would be funny (and a bit sad) if his 7 year absence was caused by Alastor travelling as far as he could get from everyone else in the Pride Ring and just living in the cabin in the woods

I see where your mind's at and there's a BIT of truth to that. The proximity idea could work as the thought was that the level of obsession isn't always at its max. People will stay obsessed with Alastor, but it won't always be as strong particularly when he's not around. But it CAN still be VERY active in cases like Vox, where no matter the proximity he's more or less obsessed with Alastor. Granted, that could be in part due to his normal personality he is that way.

I think it might help to give some level of how I've thought the curse works: How I've figured it works is that once you catch it, it's sorta like a disease (so maybe obsession disease is better to refer to the people obsessed with Al?). When someone gets to Hell, they're not immediately in love and obsessed with Alastor, they more than likely don't even know the guy. There has to be at least SOME form of interaction. Whether it's talking to him, seeing him across the street, or maybe listening to his radio show, though I'm not set on the latter. However, you did still get some ideas correct as proximity has been a consistent idea. The more you're around Alastor, the worse the obsession. That's in part why there's still a functioning Hell, most demons don't spend time around Alastor himself. They might try to toss themselves at him if they see him walking by, but they can get with ordinary lives just fine. AKA: You more or less nailed it in the coffin with how the curse works.

The only difference is that where you're suggesting is the curse to be in effect wherever Alastor is (realm wise in this case), I'm thinking more of a "proximity kinda has some part at play, but you're gonna stay obsessed no matter where you are, even in heaven". My thought is that it just never goes away like people are actually more akin to being INFECTED by the curse rather than AFFECTED. However, I do have to admit your take makes more sense in that, it is dependent on Alastor more than it is on others. Like, the curse is MADE for Alastor, it's HIS eternal punishment, and it's just an accidental consequence for others too. So their being away from the source would logically "get rid of it" because it's not THEIR punishment, they're just affected by ALASTOR'S punishment. And the logic of it is what make me keep coming back to think about this idea of it mainly being a proximity thing rather than the obsession treated like a disease. Because as neat as the disease thing works, the proximity thing does make the curse feel like Alastor's punishment specifically rather than like, a zombie outbreak or something, like being obsessed with Alastor is a consequence you get for being in Hell. The sort of "disease route" I'll call it, reads as that more than the "purely proximity" thing. Plus, it would just give an easy answer if Alastor died- hm, actually thinking about it, some people might just end up being obsessed with his body then maybe. TL;DR I think perhaps I was thinking of it more as a disease than a curse, but your suggestion honestly reads better as the latter, which is what I'm going for.

Admittedly, I just don't personally like the idea that characters can go to heaven and get full awareness. I don't know why, I just don't particularly like it? And I suppose it's in part that, if Alastor went to heaven and we went by the proximity thing, everyone in heaven would be affected by it. Granted, it could be both proximity and an angelic thing, but it doesn't REALLY have to be a one-or-the-other sort of deal. Alternatively, I think the more likely reason I don't like the "heaven gives full clarity" thought is that it sorta gives an easy solution. Okay, "easy" is probably not the right word here, but it essentially gives it a sort of "if they (Charlie & Vaggie) are able to go to heaven often enough, they can make plans to go against the curse". Hopefully, you get what I'm saying with that. But I understand narratively speaking with story beats this would actually be good. I guess I'm not really interested in characters outside of Alastor trying to find a solution though as Charlie and Vaggie wouldn't forget their time in heaven when the curse is active again. Then again, there are ways the curse COULD counteract those logical paths of thought. Like they could look back and have a moment of "bad opinion I had when I was up there" or just misremembering. Heck, I don't even know if them making plans against the curse would even be THAT much of an issue. They kind of got bigger fish to fry than one man's comfort unfortunately.

Thinking about it more, the proximity thing does honestly just make more sense from more perspectives than the route I was thinking with it. So I can see myself going with your idea moving forward. I'm not a particular fan but I'm not really indulgent with stuff? Okay, sometimes I am but for the most part, I want things that work the best narratively and story-wise, and sometimes that includes things I don't particularly like myself. Maybe I'll go back to the "obsession never leaves" thing, but the logic of it only being by proximity and how it relates to it being Alastor's punishment specifically is what keeps me away from that idea now.

With THAT said, I do think I'm still partial to "unfallen angelic beings" aren't affected by it. Angelic beats demonic in this universe and Alastor's punishment would be a demonic thing, so I think it'd only make sense for unfallen Angels to be unaffected.

Alastor going as far away as possible is something that would work with either version, but I can totally see that happening. However, I'm still working with the canonical story on some level and was planning to keep the cause of his 7-year absence the same. Then again, this is an AU and maybe I should be giving it more of that treatment because I do like the idea of him leaving the cities to try to find some form of peace.

TLDR Again: Your idea works better than mine, so I'm stealing it.

#Anonymous #cel answers #cel rambles #Hazbin Obsession AU #Should I be calling it the “Obsession Punishment” instead of “Obsession Curse”?#... Meh same difference

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boldlyexplorational · 2 months ago

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Episode 29 "Kirk's worst day ever" "operation: annihilate!"

Here we go, last episode! Peculiar choice for a finale, maybe COTEOF would have been a better choice, if maybe more depressing. But I guess there was a different concept of season finale back then, episodes needed to be stand alone first and foremost.

As a SNW watcher I was really sad about Sam. Poor guy, I didn't deserve that. It's always so sad when you know how a character is going to end up.

The opening was flawless, with McCoy revealing how Kirk's family is on the infected planet. I also love how it's implied that Kirk just did not answer that question and ignored Bones until later to tell him "yeah you were right". That was kinda funny, except for the tragedy of course.

It looked like the episode was filmed in a real place with modern architecture for the time, which I love and it looked cool. The alien parasites also were cool and gross and had clever effects. I'm a sucker for practical effects so I'm biased.

It's a real bad day for Kirk, isn't it? When the wife also died I was like "that's too much", but then when Spock got infected... My headcanon is that he did take a crying break in his quarters. He has the emotional intelligence to know he needed it. But of course you can't show the captain crying.

There's this one moment when Kirk is super impressed with how Spock is resisting the pain of the infection. Kirk decides to compliment Spock in the most effectively flirty way possible: saying that his logic is impeccable. And Spock makes a face like "that was hot, but not now captain, I'm busy fighting to stay alive".

Kirk was SO MAD at bones when he blinded Spock! So mad! He sort of cooled off after, but in the moment I thought he was going to slap bones. Or rather to the signature full body yeet at him.

Shout out to Chapel who shined in this episode, I love that she's such a tough woman!

One last thing I will say, the only thing I didn't really like in the episode: they kept amping the stakes, on and on. They made it personal for Kirk, though there was no need for it (Kirk would have helped anyway). They made the wife die to... Fine , ok I'm concerned now. They made a big deal about the kid... And now SPOCK IS INFECTED! Ok that's A LOT. He's cured, but he's BLIND NOW! I can't take it anymore. Then the episode ends, all is well, everyone's ok, NO MENTION OF WHAT HAPPENS TO KIRK'S ORPHANED NEPHEW. I'm sure they had no money for an extra scene with a child actor, but at least throw a line in there or something. I don't know, I don't mind surreal high stakes but I do hate feeling like I was led on and made feel tense and worried ... For nothing. Like a trap. I know ST writing can be better than this, so I was disappointed.

And it's not the first time they do this too, and I know it also may be because viewers tuning in mid episode needed new stakes to be engaged in the story ... But that doesn't mean you have to escalate at that rate and then diffuse with no consequence.

#star trek #st tos #star trek the original series #star trek tos #st tos 1 #operation: annihilate

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cal-daisies-and-briars · 3 months ago

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🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸

162 sentences!

SPOILERS AHEAD!

---

Over the past few days, he’s gotten text update after text update. SIngle sentence missives about the state of the man he loves. He cannot visit him. He cannot be there for him. He cannot hold him. He cannot yell at him for his foolishness.

All Eddie can do is wait.

Wait and fucking hope.

He’s had extensive conversations with Christopher in the midst of this limbo. Angry conversations. Sad conversations. Anxious conversations. Conversations about guilt and repression and grief; things he’d never have thought in a million years he’d be willing to discuss with his teenage son. But by the end of it, Christopher isn’t upset with him anymore. Somehow. Somehow, Christopher says he understands. Wants to move forward.

“I don’t like being mad,” he says. “And I don’t like you being mad at yourself.”

Eddie thinks he’s spent most of his life mad at himself. It’s strange now, to have his son tell him to stop. Like now he has to really do it, in order to not disappoint him.

So he will try.

But if Buck doesn’t make it out of this okay, he thinks he will fail.

Eventually, he gets the phone call from the man himself, on Sophia’s phone.

“Hey, Eddie,” Buck’s voice rasps through the speakers when Eddie answers, expecting his sister.

“Buck,” Eddie nearly squeaks. His voice instantly cracking with emotion, like he’s a teen again. “You’re awake.”

“Happy Valentine’s Day?” Buck offers weakly.

Eddie doesn’t find it funny.

“How… How are you feeling?” He asks. He can’t sort out the intermingling tendrils of anger and worry and love.

“Like ass,” Buck admits. “But I’m alive… And I’m not…”

“Yeah.”

He knew that already. But it’s still a relief to hear, nonetheless.

“Apparently you sort of vaccinated me,” Buck whispers.

“I did what?” Eddie asks.

“They think I fought off the infection because of repeated exposure.”

Eddie sits with that for a second. Realizes what it means.

“Oh my god,” he mutters.

“So, uh, thank you? Seriously.”

“Wow. I… Wow.” Eddie exhales. “So you’re just… Okay?”

“I mean, still pretty banged up.”

“There is that.”

“But yeah, I’m okay. They’re discharging me tomorrow. Just want me to stay another night for monitoring and tests.”

Eddie swallows. One more night. He can handle one more night. He handled months upon months, after all. And even before then, they weren’t together all the time. This separation anxiety should not be so consuming.

“Okay,” Eddie says. “I’ll see you then. And I’m here to call.”

“Yeah,” Buck mumbles. Eddie can hear the nerves in his voice. “I love you, Eddie.”

He says it like he’s worried Eddie might not say it back. Like doing what he did might have erased Eddie’s love. And yet, he was willing to do it. Shit.

“I love you, too, Buck.” Eddie says, trying to erase anything else from his voice. “Get some rest, okay?”

February 15th, 2025

Maddie drives Buck home the next morning, after the doctors determine he’s stable enough to leave.

“Someone may be in contact,” they say. “Your case could go a long way in progressing research.”

“Fun,” Buck mumbles in response. He loves the idea of being a lab rat, really.

It’s quiet between him and Maddie in the car. He gets it. He gets why they’re all mad at him. Bobby stopped by to express his anger, too. And also his worry. He thinks they’ll all forgive him, just maybe not as easily as Sophia. Sophia, who would have done the same thing in Buck’s position. That’s the main reason she can’t stay angry.

Maddie, though? Maddie might be able to stay very angry.

“Look, Mads,” he says once they’re on the road. “I’m really sorry.”

“Somehow, I doubt that,” she says.

“What?” Buck frowns.

“You’re really sorry you failed and almost died,” she says.

“Well, yeah?”

“Not that you did it.”

Buck swallows. Okay, so maybe she’s got him there.

“I had to try,” he says.

“Did you?” She asks.

“Yes! Wouldn’t you do the same for Chim?”

“If he was in immediate danger, sure? But it looks like the only immediate danger that night was the danger you caused.” Maddie scolds. “After saying you spent months and months having to be so careful.”

“Eddie is in danger!” Buck argues. “The world puts him in danger!”

“The answer to that is not getting yourself killed, Evan! The answer to that is working to make change where you can!”

Buck looks away from her. He feels heated with anger and shame. Something deep down in him sees the sense in what she’s saying, but he doesn’t feel it. He feels that he did what he had to. He tried.

But he failed. So none of it really matters anyway.

Everyone’s anger might have been easier to swallow if he’d succeeded and Eddie was safe.

Buck takes a deep breath.

“I am sorry I scared you.” He tries. “And got blood all over your car.”

Maddie sighs. He sees the crack in her anger.

“Evan, I know this has been hard on you. Hard in a way I don’t understand because I’ve been fortunate enough not to experience it.”

He looks at his feet.

“But when I see you get reckless with your life again, the way you used to, it scares me,” she says. “It makes me worry for you, beyond just the physical harm.”

That… That’s a fair statement.

“You’re probably not wrong,” he says quietly. “I’ve been… I’ve been anxious. Like, uh… Like something bad is always waiting around the corner and I’m going to lose him again.”

Maddie nods. “You did lose him. For a long time. I get why it doesn’t feel safe now.”

Buck’s throat feels tight.

“You have to deal with it properly,” Maddie says. “I think you know that.”

And maybe he hadn’t, before. But he thinks he does now.

“Yeah,” Buck whispers. “Okay.”

He doesn’t know exactly how to do that. But he supposes he owes it to everyone he nearly died on the other night to at least try.

#daisies and briars writes #long death fic

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fallloverfic · 11 months ago

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TGCF donghua Season 2, Episode 10 thoughts

This episode T-T T-T T-T T-T. Spoilers for the show and the book below. CW reference to suicide.

The dude being racist to An Le looks vaguely like a love child of Feng Xin and Nie Mingjue (the donghua version) roflmao. Animators have made little references to The Scum Villain's Self Saving System this season so I would not be surprised if someone snuck in a reference to the Mo Dao Zu Shi donghua, too lol And this is similar enough to at least one Meng Yao + Nie Mingjue scene that I can see why they'd do it here.

So the Xianle goons licking their lips is because, I imagine, whatever was in that pouch Qi Rong brought An Le infected them or maybe it was these actual soldiers or something. Makes it less mmm... Strange. Having seen recordings of an attempted assault on a principal government building with government officials inside and what bloodthirsty folks bent on literal murder of said officials get up to around that, I mean I guess it's not that..... strange......

Someone here let me know that the servant/friend is the same official from S02E01 who ran past Xie Lian to help Lang Qianqiu, which makes sense! I totally forgot he showed up then and wondered after S02E07 if he was An Le acting funny (though by the end of S02E09 he is clearly not). He does show up in the novel in that S02E01 scene, but he's not named so far as I can tell, and I don't think we see him in Yong'an flashbacks like we do here. It's neat to see the development of this side character, and how some officials reward people who support them in life (besides Xie Lian and Yin Yu).

Xie Lian seeing the guy nervously looking for Lang Qianqiu and then being like: -sigh- young love is such a trial. You should spend more time studying the blade!

Oh shit, we get a preview of Xie Lian's parents' suicide. Wow. Will we get the donghua that far please T-T

I'm just in love with Fangxin's cape. It's so beautiful trailing behind him.

I'm sorry but An Le screaming in the same way Nakahara Chuuya does whenever he's mid-Corruption in Bungo Stray Dogs made me laugh so hard roflmao Unexpected (and likely unintentional) cameo lol

Imma keep saying it, the animation in this episode is really good. The fight scene is wonderful. When they go back to Qi Rong cackling is good. The show is just pretty.

Qi Rong: "Why is everyone here so fond of crying!"

This man is tired. Can't you do a little mass murder and gloating in peace? Honestly. Hard times.

Qi Rong: "You want your parents? I haven't gone asking for mine yet!"

Aw Qi Rong, babe...

Qi Rong got anime slashed. Who could have foreseen??? /end sarcasm

Xie Lian having a sad moment about Qi Rong, thinking he died. I'm wondering what the crying scene is from, or if that's something new. Qi Rong did cry I think in one flashback (I think where he's complaining about something) but this looked sadder? And less "spoiled".

Xie Lian sadly reaching out for Lang Qianqiu T-T

Xie Lian: "Is the truth so important? . . . What's the use of him knowing that? If I killed a few less people, would that make my reasons more justified?"

I really do love this so much. Just... sometimes the truth isn't important. Sometimes the truth is more painful/results in a worse outcome. Being bluntly honest isn't always the answer. You could argue that Xie Lian sacrificing himself isn't the answer either, and it's better overall that Lang Qianqiu knows things, but I love how this story brings up this idea, that maybe ignorance was better. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, and Xie Lian did still intentionally murder two people, as part of a cover-up.

Also, "You'd rather be right than be loved," is something I think about a lot from personal experience. It's not Hua Cheng's intention, but this kind of thinking can lead down that path so easily.

Hua Cheng really feeling that "fucked around and found out" part of this whole thing. Like I don't necessarily disagree with his goal here, and Xie Lian's plan is kind of well... imperfect (to put it lightly). But I do think this is a nice moment of Hua Cheng realizing that yes, he is Xie Lian's #1 fan, he is Xie Lian's strongest believer, and Xie Lian clearly cares deeply for him in return, but this does not mean that Hua Cheng understands Xie Lian perfectly, or knows all his thoughts (does Hua Cheng know a lot about him? Yes. But Xie Lian hides a lot of what he thinks, and has done so throughout his life). When thinking about Hua Cheng, I often think of Sosuke Aizen's line in Bleach chapter 170: "Admiration is the state furthest from understanding."

Unlike other people, Hua Cheng sets himself apart by not forcing his views on Xie Lian or trying to get Xie Lian to change to suit him, and he's realizing, "Oh shit, I fucked up with that here, didn't I," because in his quest for justice, to protect Xie Lian, he did just what he hates other people doing (to an extent, it's not nearly as bad as other folks). One thing I love so much about their relationship is how much they listen to each other, and learn from each other, and how Hua Cheng tries to see Xie Lian in ways other people don't. Even here, he's seeing Xie Lian (I really love that they focused so much on Hua Cheng's expressions here, even if he's not visually doing as much as Xie Lian, it's the little clear signs of upset that mean so much). He's not interrupting Xie Lian, he's not arguing his case (though to be fair, he already mostly has). He's trying to learn and be better. They recover from this because of that. And I love that about them.

Xie Lian: "I deserve whatever punishment I get and I can't die anyway. So why not put all the blame on me?"

T-T Crying in the club, folks. This man...

Xie Lian realizing he's being mean to Hua Cheng and apologizing got me T-T He's so scared of himself and what he's capable of - and incapable of, given all his work to try and save lives and mend old anger has come to naught, and he can't fix it. He always doubts himself before others. The scars of Bai Wuxiang are all over this episode, and Xie Lian himself, figuratively and literally. All this episode I cry T-T

Xie Lian's Chinese voice actor has done such a good job. Everyone is amazing (Qi Rong's VA doing amazing), but dang, he is phenomenal this episode. You can really feel Xie Lian's desperation and sorrow.

All in all the subs were also better this episode! They still call Qi Rong the "Green Immor" for some reason, but outside maybe one slightly awkward sentence, I think it was okay! But that doesn't necessarily mean anything cause they've been good and then got worse again lol

An excellent episode. Truly phenomenal. I think one of my favorites, particularly for this ending bit with Xie Lian and Hua Cheng talking to each other.

Other episode thoughts for season 2 (didn't start till episode 3):

S02E03

S02E04

S02E05

S02E06

S02E07

S02E08

S02E09

S02E10 (you are here)

S02E11

S02E12

#Heaven Official's Blessing #HOB #TGCF #Hua Cheng #Xie Lian #Hualian #Hua Cheng/Xie Lian #Hua Cheng x Xie Lian #spoilers #Qi Rong #Lang Qianqiu #An Le #good fucking food #suicide reference #fallfthoughts

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codecicle · 1 year ago

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i am still going so insane over the Guys man AUGH

Hi soup!! :) Random question but:

Do you ever think about how deeply they cared about each other? Wilbur knew everyone else there exclusively while he was infected, and yet he put nothing but trust in them during a life or death scenario. During his final moments, Charlie showed him unwavering kindness by listening to his rant and sparing him the pain of transformation by snapping his neck. Had Wilbur ever experienced something that genuinely caring and sweet before? If the apocalypse forced pure violence to become the greatest show of love you could give to someone, how do you think Wilbur felt when these abnormal strangers his life had happened to cross paths with went out of their way to search for him when he was lost, to kill for him when he was in danger, and ultimately to sacrifice their own safety and stability to preserve his? Do you think he felt guilt despite it all? He was infected after all, nothing but a liability, constantly endangering the team because he couldn't admit to himself that it was over; that he was a danger instead of something (something. not someone. at that point he could at least admit to himself that he wasn't human, whether that be because he was infected or because no human in any definition of the word would be as selfish and cruel as he was from not telling them) that could help. Do you think he was smiling as he faked his death? Do you think he honestly thought the zombies would kill him and he would finally do something useful for them? Or do you think he knew deep down he would survive the zombie encounter and he was only hoping the zombies would fuck him up bad enough that when the time came he inevitably killed his friends, they didn't recognize the face taking all their hopes and dreams out from underneath them because of one "tiny little scratch" and their misplaced trust.

Do you ever think about Tommy? Do you think about how he had seemingly finally found a family, and how he looked away from his older brother figure for half a second to try and be useful by keeping morale up, only to walk back into the room with the man he trusted the most holding Wilburs dead body and grieving? Do you think he resented Charlie in that moment? Or did he just hate himself? None of this would have happened if he had just been there a couple seconds sooner after all, maybe he could have done something. Do you think about him having to walk up to what he thought was Wilburs corpse and not have the time to say his goodbyes? The zombies were coming, and all he could hear outside of Charlie's shaky disassociated voice was the deafening sound of zombies slowly getting louder. Do you think about him holding Wilbur as gently as he could, knowing carrying his body to be devoured would be the last moments he could get to grieve him before being forced to run again, abandoning the man he loved like a brother for what felt like the millionth time since knowing him. Do you think about the way his jokes got scarcer since Wilbur was gone? How he stopped being as funny for the rest of the time they were in that base? Do you think it was because he couldn't bring himself to find humor in such a dark scenario, or do you think it was because he knew deep down he didn't have a real reason to try and keep himself and the group alive anymore. His reason to keep going was devoured by the zombies and time stopped, why should he care anymore? Do you think he froze when Wilbur hopped out of the trunk? Do you think he mirrored the same smile his brother died with when he was devoured? Was it because the torment was finally over? Or was it because deep down all he wanted was to be with him again, even in death?

What about Phil? He looked at Wilbur the way the proudest and most fearful dad would look at his extraordinary son. But unlike the others, Phil grieved Wilbur long before he was ever even gone. As soon as he saw the bite and the way Wilburs life was slowly leaving his eyes he knew that it was over. Phil ran gauntlets, running inbetween zombies in camouflage to open door after door, opportunity after opportunity, just to keep his family alive. All he wanted the whole time was to keep everyone else alive, and set them up to thrive after he was gone. Do you think Phil knew he was going to die the whole time? He was the slowest of the group, he was the weakest, he didn't have any special gifts or abilities, and he couldn't fend for himself as well as he could fend for others. Do you think he was so serious the whole time because he wanted to spend the last moments with his son, and because he knew he wouldn't have another chance to be of use? He wasn't surviving for himself, he was surviving to keep everyone else alive. Do you think if they ever actually succeeded in escaping, that he would be the one to take night watch every time? That he would be the one to give up his food rations so others wouldn't go hungry? That he would sacrifice every part of himself before he stole the chance at life from someone that he thought deserved it better? Do you think when he finally got the chance to keep everyone else alive through fighting off the hoard by himself, he went down through tears? Or do you think he matched the other members of his family and fought them head on with nothing but a spiked golf club, his pride, and a smile to match his two sons?

What about Ranboo? Do you ever think about them? Do you think about the way they seemed to be the only person truly in reality the whole time? They were the only one refusing to do the bits, to tag along with the jokes, yet they were also the only person to kill the zombies, or hold any weapons. Do you ever think about how he had the most sincerely human reaction to all of this? Maybe the reason he refused to kill the zombies was because they so closely resembled himself, and they couldn't bring themself to kill something that looked so much like a real person. He knew they weren't alive, he knew he was constantly in danger, yet they looked into the zombies eyes and saw the blank void staring back at him and chose pity and kindness above all. Do you think when they said everyone around them was insane they really meant it? He seemed strangely grounded in reality at all times, while everyone else disassociated to get themselves through the killing, and the way blood splattered on everyone's clothes dragging the physical remains of their deepest regrets along with them to their deaths. Do you think they put the gun down, finally feeling safe in that Uber knowing no zombie would be able to catch them? Do you think he was glad he never had to actually use it? Were they happy they could keep their humanity as they escaped? Do you think he hoped for a better life after it all? Do you think he looked into Wilburs eyes as he was devoring Tommy, his brother that Wilbur cared for so so much, and they still couldn't bring themselves to pull the trigger? Do you think in their attempt to keep their humanity, he indirectly robbed everyone he cared about of theirs?

And Charlie. Ohhhh Charlie. Do you ever think about how hard he fought? He knew how to create makeshift weapons, he knew parkour, he knew how to fight and shoot and fend for himself, and yet he didn't survive despite all of it. Do you ever think about how he trusted and loved Wilbur so deeply, yet he was forced to lay down with his arms around him as he started spouting nonsense? Do you think Charlie could think straight as Wilbur slid down and indirectly begged him for mercy? Maybe Charlie wasn't as kind as he once thought, because as he held Wilbur in his arms he slowly realized the only real way out of this nightmare would be without him. Do you ever think about how much Charlie loved him? How he stared at him the whole time, looking with widened and obviously trusting eyes, how he grabbed Wilburs arm and looked at the bite as soon as he noticed something was wrong? Do you ever think about how deeply he must have loved both him and everyone else in the group, and how he had to swallow down his humanity for a moment to gift Wilbur the last of his? Do you think about how he hesitated? He had his head in his arms, Wilbur was very obviously letting it happen, and yet he couldn't bring himself to do it. Maybe from his selfishness, and how he couldn't bring himself to kill his closest friend. Or maybe from his selflessness, and him digesting the fact that after this he would be a villain to the rest of the group. None of them knew how far Wilbur was gone, only Charlie noticed, maybe they would walk in on his grief and see nothing but a murderer? Do you think about how despite everything Charlie spared Wilbur from his pain and killed him anyway, helping him the only way he knew how during Wilbur's greatest time of need. Do you think Charlie stayed behind that gate willingly, knowing he wouldn't be able to live with himself after they escaped? Do you think Charlie died thinking he was useful, or he wasn't useful enough. Do you think he truly believed the others would resent him, or do you think he just resented himself with every life he stole. Do you ever think about how Charlie died thinking he saved their lives, not knowing his grief personified would be waiting for the rest of them to undo everything Charlie tried to do during his life? Do you think Charlie died with a smile not because he was happy that his last moments were spent truly believing because of his sacrifice his friends would live, but because he knew he wouldn't have to live with any of the guilt anymore?

idk though :)

#i make yet anothet post just for me 👍#sorry boys #we have mail :]#can you tell zombie!oxeyeduo are my favorites? also sbi is real and true you can pry that from my cold dead hands #SORRY FOR THE RANT LMAO IM ALSO THINKING ABOUT THEM CONSTANTLY!!#im not sure any of this even makes sense but if it does yippie ^_^#nobody understands them like i do. except you but that doesnt count #fuck wait i forgor to call you a petname this post uh uh #hey babygrill. zombie! 👍#yeah there we go :D

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