#it would be hilarious. HILARIOUS

[mysterycitrus]

i think damian is right about everything he's ever said or done. source: imagine this panel but with yakety sax going in the background.

this is objectively hilarious. i rest my case

i would actually sincerely love a one-shot comic that’s just tim and damian fighting each other with increasingly looney tunes-esque hijinks

damian paints a realistic tunnel that tim then runs into. tim drops an anvil on damians head. they chase each other around until alfred serves lunch, which they eat together in silence until they clear the plates and then start running around again. tim sets up a trap that cass walks through without being affected. when tim tries the same thing, he gets caught upside down. damian laughs at him before accidentally triggering the second trap and gets caught in a net right next to him.

the feud lasts sixteen straight hours until dick has to sit down with them and explain that the weird yahoo! noises they keep making at each other are very unsettling and that they should instead spend their time doing something less destructive. like playing mario kart or volunteering with the elderly

[fromcainwithlove]

author’s notes today: hey guys so just a warning there isn’t 100% explicit verbal consent even though they’re both really into it so remember this is FICTION, also they don’t use a condom :((( but in real life safe sex is important!!! please be safe out there everyone

a/n back in the day: kept thinking about ____ stabbing knives through both of _____’s hands to pin him in place while they fucked so here you go lol =P

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[shandzii]

hiiii eternal sugar 😊

[captainrufflebanger]

I couldn't find the original post so I redrew it from memory for myself and anyone who needs to hear this

Very important message for LGBTQIA+ Americans today:

We gonna get through the next 4 years out of spite if nothing else ❤️

[everwalldigan]

I love hitting characters with the trans beam but I love it even more when the implications of that are 10 times funnier than their presumed cis identities. EXHIBIT A: Richard “Dick” Grayson.

Dick, filing his legal documents with Bruce: okay you’re gonna scratch that name and write down “Richard”. But everyone will call me Dick

Bruce: …are you sure about that

Dick: did I stutter

Bruce: it’s a… really outdated name chum the kids at school aren’t gonna be nice about it

Dick: I. don’t. Care. Are you gonna write that down or should I go do the paperwork with the WE lawyers tomorrow?

Bruce: okay okay fine… if that’s what makes you happy…

Dick: this is gonna be the funniest thing I have ever done in my life

[frownyalfred]

thinking about the expert masseuse Alfred hired for the family that is paid a small fortune annually to provide massage services and ignore so, so many things. No questions, no remarks, just quality service and an ironclad NDA that, if broken, would probably topple said masseuse’s entire family line.

Things Alfred is paying them to ignore, in no specific order:

Bruce’s spinal hardware courtesy of Bane :)

weird amounts of muscle on everyone, even the kids (despite them allegedly not working physical jobs)

scars

FRESH scars

the fact that every joint in Bruce’s body clicks when moved/manipulated at the tender age of 42

Olympic athlete level physiques

rotator cuff injuries across the whole family

scars that are definitely from bullets and/or acid splashes

old signs of what looks like torture (Bruce)

Dick’s entire left arm is basically screws and plates (he “fell really bad” once)

every single family member takes deep tissue massage with max pressure with 0 complaints

calluses

no really, the weirdest fucking calluses

[stealingyourbones]

Danny has been having issues trying to find a job that allows him to use his powers. He’s no longer in the superhero scene anymore but why not still put his powers to use?

After successfully gaining a job as a Stuntman, he didn’t know what he signed himself up to do but he took multiple classes to prepare and fell in love with the profession. His powers letting him further excel in his career as things like flight, intangibility, and duplication all were things that studio heads were delighted of as it lessened the cost of production.

Stuntman don’t get a lot of recognition by average film goers which is fine for Danny. Staying under the radar and living a normal life is all he could ever ask for.

Sadly for Danny, that anonymity didn’t last forever. Danny was hired as a stunt performer in a 90s satire esque autobiography movie written and starring the Gotham Billionaire Bruce Wayne.

During an on set interview midway though Bruce explaining to the interviewer that Hot Shots was his biggest inspiration for this film, Danny casually walked behind the set, just trying to get to the costume department and thinking nothing of being temporarily on camera behind the Billionaire.

The day the interview was uploaded onto YouTube, Danny’s phone was blowing up from messages from his friends and family telling him he had become an internet sensation overnight. It turns out his casual walk behind Bruce Wayne led to the internet losing their minds trying to find the Bruce Wayne look-alike. I mean, Danny DID become Bruce’s primary stunt double because he looked so similar, that’s the whole point of stunt doubles, but Danny didn’t think it was THAT similar.

[egophiliac]

did this as a quick scribble at like 1 AM last night and...immediately lost all motivation to ever clean it up. ( ᐛ ) but I had to draw my son being the fanciest little flower boy who ever threw petals down an aisle. oh my god.

[chloesimaginationthings]

The FNAF 2 movie animatronics just stab people now

[brainrotcharacters]

the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.

[chazchaschad]

he’s such a loser nerd I love him

[the-irrelevant-trumpeter]

this is possibly the funniest terf take i’ve ever seen. trans people, hate to tell you this but buying clothes is actually capitalist and you should stop /j.

[cyanoweasel]

did the actual tomska reblog my stupid decade old rageface??

[effemar]

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

Local idiot absolutely destroys his twin brother

⚠️ Do not try this at home❗️⁉️