#it will also make you cry
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I was thinking about this again and it made me wonder if perhaps the first episode, Tourist Trapped, took place after this moment; which would make Stan giving Mabel and Dipper each one free item at the end so much more sadder because he really wanted them to give him a chance.
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stan pines#mabel pines#dipper pines#grunkle stan#WE CRYING IN THE CLUB FOR STAN PINES IN THIS HOUSE#stan pines you deserve the world#(also i will be making a comic about this)
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the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.
sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.
you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.
it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.
but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.
they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.
they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.
barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.
and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.
but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.
they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!
this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.
#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone#yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post.#writeblr#ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person#and on this blog we support workers.#at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going.#when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens#have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists#and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like.#it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases -#at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory.#it was what i had seen.#and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference#we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol'#so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender#and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID.#he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different#i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.
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"I'll show you every day that choosing to live was worth it"
some of my favourite scenes from @hijinks-n-lowjinks' fic things i would miss from the other side . this fic tore my heart out fr but like in a good way and i wanted to pay it homage the only way i know how <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#I LOVE PLOTTING AND ALSO SCHEMING#listen i have a lot of feelings and i needed 2 process them and i do that by making art 2 target my mutuals directly#read my about it's there it's in the fineprint if we talk You Are Not Safe smile#i just . BITING BITING BITING this fic#the domesticity the grief the casual yet unfathomably deep soulmatism.......im ruined i tell u Ruined#so naturally i dropped everything#remember how i said lefts/rights r my enemy my beloathed my nemesis. MIRRORS MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE FHGDSAJFGJS I WANTED DEATH#i was like this is incorrect. no this is correct. flips them around in my head. no im wrong again actually#purgatory tbh but we got there (watch me be wrong again tho if i am wrong again i think i will Cry)#anyway!!! i don't have much else to say except pls read the fic and show jinx some love they 1000% deserve it this fic 1000% deserves it#i could only draw so many scenes but i would draw all of it if i could#fr i ws so paranoid abt accuracy lmao cut 2 footage of me looking up rice cooker models and wtf the colour 'carnelian' was#i hope i got everything right i hope i did it justice :'>#also if any1 mentions how megumi's arm in 3 is at an awkward angle. look me in the eye and tell me youve comfortably cuddled with someone#i will call u a liar
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REPLICA PLAYLIST
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MUSIC UNDER CUT
I have been receiving requests for any songs that inspired Replica, so here, have my personal playlist. Sorry it’s not Spotify/Soundcloud but they don’t have some of these songs available so uh… guess you’re stuck with YouTube vids. For fun I'll include my personal titles for them (which might give a few hints of what to expect in the future/end).
Replica Main Theme - “Die for You” by Grabbitz Like Father Like Son Like Brother (Omega and Shelldon) - "As Above So Below" by Alistair Lindsay Mikey's Theme / The 1st Vision - "Suzume no Tojimari" by Nanoka Hara Military (Mad) Dogs / Central Park Colony - "Imperium" by Madeon Shanghai - "Icarus" by Madeon Boom Goes the Donnie-mite (Mikey/Donnie vs the Sweeper) - "The Red Zone" by Mitsuoto Suzuki The Day the Sky Bled Red - "7 Seconds Till the End" by Nobuo Uematsu Going Out Like a Boss (Raph and Leo) - "Agape" by Nicholas Britell Remembering the Right Way (Mikey and Leo) - "The Souls of Many" - by Alistair Lindsay Mystic Hands / The 2nd Vision - "Am I Dreaming" by Metro Boomin x A$AP Book 2 Trailer - "Sea Dragon" by Covet 7 Years Later - "Iron" by Woodkid Leo's Theme / Attack on the Labor Camp - "Ego Death" by Polyphia Omega's Theme - "Touch" by Daft Punk Flat Lines (Omega Alone) - "Die Toteninsel Emptiness" by 1000 Eyes Spear - "Monsters" by Tommee Profitt Final Protocol - "The Kraken" by Katie Dey Rise / Epilogue - "Close in the Distance" by Masayoshi Soken & Tom Mills
I will admit, it's a little embarrassing since you can easily see the patterns of what I've been listening to for the past year or two. I swear I listen to more than just videogame OSTs, these songs just jive well with the story and I often find lyrics distracting when brainstorming scenes. Regardless, the music I listen to is such an important part of my creative process and some of these songs really defined the scenes I now have locked in my head. So I figured it was only fair to give them the credit they're due.
I will continue to add to this playlist, and will note in comic updates when one of these songs is applicable!
#lofi Donnie anyone?#also sort of celebration for 19k followers wow#should I do something else for it?#I particularly like Leo's theme being titled Ego Death#very fitting#Also the final song makes me cry because the lyrics are just too dang perfect#I'd like to do an animatic with the song when this story is all done#check out the lyrics if you get the chance#in fact I'd like to do an animatic trailer for the Book 2 Teaser#we'll see though#i can't allow myself to get too distracted from the comic itself haha#replica#rottmnt replica#kathaynesart#playlist#music#spoilers? but like... you know how it ends in the movie so not really?#kind of?#did you see the rise movie?#then you’ve been spoiled sorry#posting again at an ungodly hour#I am tired#save rottmnt#rottmnt#TMNT#Donatello#casey jones
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just move on already.
#ffvii#cloud strife#zack fair#zakkura#my art <3#hey so y'know how when you're autistic and pretty stoic about shit but then something horrible happens that makes you cry#and everybody thinks you're faking it. because wtf are you crying about. don't be such a baby all of a sudden. you're better than this.#and you hear it so often that you start to believe it's true and that you're just being manipulative and attention seeking#and that you need to just get the fuck over it like everybody else.#anyway i think that's what's going on with cloud strife. just in general. wombo combo with the survivor's guilt.#also i'm totally not Projecting Onto The Blorbo or anything like that haha :)#:)#:/#:(#>:(
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no!!!!!! 8 episodes will kill patient!!!!!!!! he needs 12-24 episodes some of which is light-hearted filler to live!!!!!!!!!!!!
#this was about shows in general but dw is on my mind#like the new season was so fawking good but oh my god it's so heavy. hrgh#I know this isnt the fault of the ppl making the show it's just that fucking everything has to be 8 episodes now#well stop!!!! please!!!!!!!!! aaaa!!!!!!!!#15 clearly going thru it yelling and crying in the upcoming christmas special WOULD be exciting but that's also the#plot of every single episode in the preceding season...#i dont think him being miserable at christmas is bad in fact it's great. im saying the absence of the#5 episodes that would've been 0 stakes fun adventures is making itself very very felt and obvious#like imagine season 4 which is already pretty much just unending misery WITHOUT the few fun fillers we get. lethal and#not in a good way. sometimes you need to breathe!!!#that does not excuse pl.anet of the d.ead being ass but yknow. at least it doesn't make me cry for an hour#doctor who#dw text#barking
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So. It's established in Malevolent episode 16 that Arthur and John's emotions bleed together sometimes and there's some degree of overlap in what they think and feel. So.
What if all those times when everything seems so okay and then thirty seconds later John and Arthur are trying to kill each other are instances of that. What if all those times John becomes suddenly enraged with Arthur over things he's done (really, what business does John have being mad at Arthur for killing people etc etc?) are not John being mad at all, but rather, Arthur being so angry with himself that the emotions bleed over and are so intense as to spark a murderous rage in John.
What then.
#they make me physically ill#im also not caught up! so. if something later makes this a stupid take. uh. pretend you didnt see it.#every day i cry thinking about them#john malevolent#malevolent podcast#arthur malevolent#malevolent#john doe malevolent#johnarthur#arthur lester#jarthur#private eyes#privateyes#sigh#i hate them so much (affectionate)#malevolent spoilers#i think
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silly headcannon #2 that Bruce never got the reference that Jason always made of himself being short round (he always thought it was Jason saying he was short) until after he died and Tim, avid Indiana Jones fan made Bruce watch the movies with him, only the man breaks out crying., sobbing, full on breaking down over the two second scene that is Indy ruffling Short Round’s hair as he explains they first met when he caught the kid stealing from him, and then took him under his wing.
#i can totally see Jason coming back and absolutely faltering the first time Batman calls him short round#when they’re in better terms Jason totally gets back at Bruce by calling him dad and seeing him walk into walls#jason: get uno reverse-d bitch#meanwhile Bruce: *crying*#he called me dad#it’s Bruce’s version of calling Jason little wing#im sorry I just love that they refer to him as a smol bby#cause this man is neither short nor little#he’s Dick’s baby brother#his little wing#his dad’s short round#Bruce and Dick 🤝 calling Jason little and short#JSJKS meanwhile the entirety of Gotham in the background:#??? that is. a 6’4 tank of a man. that—that is not short nor little#tim and Jason see Indiana Jones together no I don’t make the rules#also fun fact did you know Indiana Jones is movie from the western genre?? cause I just got this information this week#im shook#JSJ#bruce wayne#jason todd#tim drake#indiana jones#red hood#batman#dc
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IT’S A RAINBOW OF BILLS! A BILLBOW! RGBILL!!!
The clip of Bill saying YELLOW was all over my FYP and it inspired me…
#bill cipher#gravity falls#the book of bill#will cipher#gravity falls fanart#i love him so much#my perfect equilateral#hes my son and my worstie and my bestie and my muse and also dead to me and is my everything#i love triangles#hes soooooo#silly guy#literally perfect#he makes me throw up#hes so ugly#jk hes beautiful#i love you bill cipher#sweet little awful piece of shit#he did it all but he doesnt deserve prison#he makes me cry#but i also want to strangle him#and hug him#he should die again#i will be there to love him#and remind him of his crimes#what a creature#sillay
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One of the things that strikes me about the whole Neil Gaiman thing is that people really want to portray Amanda Palmer as being a remorselessly complicit figure, when a lot of things that are very obviously fucked up and menacing when you put it next to the actual assaults going on - are perfectly normalised and accepted within poly/ENM world. All of these things are fucked up and menacing, but the bubble of pseudo-feminist poly world is incredibly effective at making you totally oblivious to the fact that you're opening the door to abuse and emotional damage.
The thing of 'oh we just slept together and I took a consensual nude of you, now can I have your consent to send it to my husband' is a feature of poly culture, not a bug. Suggestive and inappropriate comments to a woman about how hot your husband will find her are completely normalised. A statement from your husband like 'I don't get to play with my Dom side with you, so I need to be with other women who are natural subs' (which I suspect is the reason he gave when he kept having affairs when she was eight months pregnant, after agreeing to be monogamous) is something that culture will expect you to be completely Cool Girl about. Being blasé when a woman comes to you and says 'your husband made a pass at me' is also the expected Cool Girl reaction. Bringing women into your circle that you think your husband will find hot is completely par for the course in those mindsets and part of being a good and fun and sexy partner - no one doing that in poly culture thinks of themselves as 'feeding him women to rape' or grooming. Lots of people seem to find Amanda telling Neil that he couldn't hit on Scarlett, but still leaving him alone with her, to be jawdropping - but, as someone who has had people in ENM relationships exhibit poor boundaries around me and try to insinuate me into their sex lives in inappropriate ways, I know that that kind of thing is seen as due diligence and an appropriate way to navigate a situation. My experience of people immersed in that kind of culture is just this general assumption that words and agreements are magic - that all you need to do is communicate and agree terms and everything is fine, and if an agreement is violated you just need to communicate more and agree terms and everything is fine, pay no attention to the man behind the curtain.
What a lot of people want (and have wanted all along when they were making jokes about how understandable it was for Neil to 'fly across the world to escape having lockdown with her') is for Amanda Palmer to have been a truly abhorrent person, when the truth is that the whole culture around poly/ENM/open relationships - not necessarily the stated rules everyone claims to be abiding by, but the actual culture itself - encourages this stuff, especially from women.
I'm not suggesting Amanda is a victim in anywhere close to the same way as any of the women profiled in the reportage, and I do think her learned obliviousness enabled her complicity in creating a situation like Scarlett being left alone with Neil, but she has clearly been manipulated as well. Think of how insanely manipulative it was for him to wait until she was in late-stage pregnancy to start violating the terms of their marriage, how he surprised her with a lot of 'dark' elements of his personality after they were already married with a child, how we don't even necessarily know how much control she had over the marital pursestrings, how (as covered in the Tortoise podcasts) he would pressure the woman who lived on his estate into sexual activity by saying that Amanda, not him, wanted to sell the house and kick her out - and that if she kept him sweet he'd be her advocate against his evil wife. He is so clearly a profoundly manipulative person and it's just lunacy to suggest that none of that manipulation will have been targeted at Amanda.
#neil gaiman#also: that her being silent about this is almost certainly for legal reasons to do with custody battles#and I think everyone can agree that however problematic you find her as a person#however much this makes you scream and cry to admit#the best option is very very clearly for her to get sole custody of that child
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The Fall of the House of Usher 1.08 | The Raven (2023)
#the fall of the house of usher#tfothou spoilers#mike flanagan#carla gugino#kyliegh curran#tfothou#lenore usher#verna#tfothouedit#dailynetflix#dailyflicks#thehauntingsource#mygifs#i was doing fine (ish)#not as much ugly crying as the other flanagan shows#but then this scene wrecked me#the fact that death was so kind to make sure lenore knew she made a difference ughhhhh idk it did something to me#the hand at the end.... the way you can feel it costed death to take lenore - BRILLIANT WRITING#also the layers of carla's acting!!! give her all the awards i'm so serious
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The butterflies in my stomach going CRRRAZZY over him…
#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#bnha#mha#dabi#touya todoroki#bnha dabi#mha dabi#bnha season 7#mha season 7#THE FUCKING SOB I JUST LET OUT BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH I LOVE FREAKY ASS FERAL SMIRK OF HIS#HIS EYES. OH. MY. GOD. I AM SO IN LOVE??????#need this man to stop playing with my heart this way because what do you mean that every time i see him i cry????#also… HANDS 👹👹👹👹 HIS HANDS 👹👹👹👹#don’t make me talk… it’s better if i stay silent… because my thoughts every time i see his hands are so impure…
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actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt
#i also like starting applause i'm really good at it and have a high score in it#i make entire groups cheer a lot. my friends are used to it . i am bolstered by so many of them being theatre kids#im like. let's celebrate! :) a guy did a thing well!!! :)#once we helped someone parallel park and it was SUCH a hard road to do it on#this is in boston. so death be upon drivers. also it was during st. anthony's feast. in the north end. iykyk#and we helped her get in there (one of my friends tbh stood in traffic for her)#and we cheered when she finally parked. she got out and she was crying and laughing and was like#''that was the hardest thing ive ever done ur so sweet''' and meanwhile we were PARTYING#just stone cold sober but like YEAH GIRL YOU DID THE HARD THING FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!#i've been bullied for so much lol i am immune to most insults at this point bc im like#girl when i was 12 i'd already heard every insult and good lord were they specific. just plain ''crazy'' aint it
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If Aabria has 1 million fans, I am one of them
If Aabria has 1 thousand fans, I am one of them
If Aabria has 1 hundred fans, I am one of them
If Aabria has 1 fan, it is Brennan Lee Mulligan and I have been killed, please avenge me
#dimension 20#aabria iyengar#y’all best not be coming for her about system choice or cinematic descriptions or shit like that#because i will fight you#but also that red headed dollop of sunshine and positivity and union solidarity loves and respects tf out of her#and i respect that#burrow's end#burrow’s end is gonna make me cry so goddamn much i bet
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KOFI
commissions: here!
membership: here!
more in-depth explanation above lol but yes, opening up my kofi for the above stuff! i'll still be posting art to my socials as usual, but there'll be more consistent/exclusive/early-access art and wip posts for members on kofi, along with all the benefits above
thank you very much for any support as always! muah
#my art#commissions#illustration#oc#beas#wellyboot#furry#anthro#i'll probably make a separate post later with some of the painted headshots i've done because i like them and they're fun to do#also sorry i will probably reblog this a bunch lol. forgive me....it's taken absolutely ages to work on all this#graphic design is NAWT my passion but hopefully this is vaguely interesting to look at/read through#i'm hoping to slooowly transition to making art on a more regular part-time job basis so i have to....advertise myself....#mortifying for everyone involved but it will give me more time to make more art (if successful) so also a win for everyone?#also i put it in the pixie tier description but please please PLEASE don't subscribe just to get the cheap birthday art and then unsub....#you will make me cry and wither away and i will have to remove it as a perk#(obligatory: of course feel free to unsubscribe at any time no explanation needed....just don't play the system i beg you)
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Small studies of Starscream in the Robots in Disguise 2015 design because he's literally perfect☺️☺️☺️ i want to marry him!!!
#my art#transformers#tfp#tf rid15#tf rid 2015#starscream#maccadam#maccadams#i think he would hate his tfp self so much but then his tfp self would be as scared of him as he is of megatron and that would make#rid15 starscream even more angry but also crash the Fuck out#and thats why hobo megatron should be there and be reasonable and that makes starscream crash out even more#and i want him to start crying#your life is ruined youre alone skyfire doesnt speak to you even tho he's (canonically) alive. your trine is probably dead#even your own damn self is scared of you and would rather hide behind megatron#mmmm#crash out crash out#dont get better bitch just get spiraling#😤😤😤😤I LOVE HIM!!!#HE IS MY FAVORITE FUCKED UP INDIVIDUAL#i want him to cry!!!#transformers prime#transformers robots in disguise 2015
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