#it was like doing 10 mini paintings LOL

[sashamini]

Happy holidays, @shu-of-the-wind !!!

Your rebelcaptain secret santa was me all along! Your prompt gave me all the power in the world to do almost whatever I wanted with this beloved pairing, and I settled with Before Sunrise: A RebelCaptain Story AU (based on the 1995 movie of the same name… kinda.) Our stars meet unexpectedly on a train traveling to Vienna, and Cassian convinces Jyn to spend his last night in Europe with him before his plane departs. They gallivant around the city, conversing about everything and nothing at all. There’s feelings and a kiss and then time is up. ALL OF THIS, and then my mind kept returning to this quote from the Rogue One novelisation “He hadn't known her, didn't know her, of course. There wasn't the time.” Then I cried.

I hope your 2025 is filled with good health, good friends, and a good cry over these two because, of course, we did know them.

[knifegremliin]

with that attack done, i have officially done more attacks this year than i did last year, despite having shitty wrists!!!

[sleepytoycollection]

This isn't a review, so I'm not going to go too in-depth or photograph everything, but I absolutely adore this set.

It's clear so much thought went into all the little details, and I can feel the love for design coming through from everyone who worked on this it.

The accessories are so good. Like having two pairs of scissors!?! And not two pairs of the same scissor mold in different colors, they're different types of scissors!!! One for the fabric, one for non-fabric. That's such a realistic detail to include. An adjustable desk?? Plus just the range and amount of items! It's wonderful. All she's missing is a cup of paint water she'll almost drink 5 times when she meant to grab her coffee lmao.

The interactive play of being able to pin the fabric onto the mannequin to try different combos and looks, being given a good amount of fabric to do so, I could go on and on.

The doll herself is lovely too, and her outfit is cute. She interacts well with her accessories, even if her skirt makes it hard for her to sit on her stool.

Honestly I have no real criticisms of this set, and I'm thrilled I got it. Plus it's so cute to see her mini desk set up on my big desk set up. Maybe I should give her little knick knacks and toys to clutter up her workspace too lol. Just a 10/10 set. Fabulous.

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday my lovely readers :) We’ve reached the episode that rocked me to my very core. Honestly haven’t been this attached to a ship in a very very long time. Years passed without this level of attachment. Bringing out sides of me I didn't think existed. Like doing reviews. But our ship is something special even when they rip our hearts out. I blame Eric and Melissa LOL They are INCREDIBLE in this episode. The both of them. Brought their A game and then some.

This ep legit affected my mood for 3 weeks no joke and utterly destroyed me. I needed extra days to decompress before did my mini. The fandom was so lovely about that too. Love this fandom so much. I still don't know how I got that out tbh lol Also God Bless my bestie D for going through that with me. I got to watch it early that day which normally didn’t get to. Was usually after work. I remember D wanted to stop me but didn’t cause she couldn’t tell me why..

I had to go to a company meeting after and pretend I wasn’t devastated. Be a positive fun leader when inside I was dying. I did a good job my team had no idea lol But damn that was tough. Never been happier for a 3 week break than after this one. We all needed it. Let us begin. And thank you all again for going through this heartbreak with me. Gif count was rough for me so I fit in everything I could and made a ton.

6x06 Secrets and Lies

We start out with Lucy looking as stressed and anxious as we’ve ever seen her. Laying in bed but most definitely is not resting. The brutal toll this situation has taken becoming visible. When Tamara asks how stressed she is from 1-10? Lucy answering 19….Ooof....Could not be more relatable if she tried. When I get this laser focused I too am a nineteen. Her person has been radio silent for days. Her last contact with him was a massive knock out drag out fight.

This is the most time they’ve spent apart since they got together. Like I stated last review other than 6x01 they've scarcely been away from one another. Her UC mission in 5x21 yes but doesn’t really count. They talked every single day. So it’s truly the longest they’ve been apart. No wonder she is at a 19. Poor Lucy. Kills me. Such a wreck without him. Tamara asks if Tim is still ghosting her? Lucy tries to defend their situation. Not well but she sure tries lol

Lucy is barely keeping it together and it shows. I love that we get a shot of her pin-up board from that BTS video. The cupcake poster hehe Hopefully that makes a triumphant return in s7. Tamara doesn’t want to add to her stress... But let's her know she wants to move out. With friends from school. Worst timing ever. It makes sense but the timing is horrendous. Lucy takes so many hits this season. It’s almost worse the second time around somehow.

This time Lucy goes to an actual adult about Tim. Not useless Nolan who was painfully inept for her. Couldn’t fit it in but we see her touch her tattoo when she approaches Angela. *heart clutch* I love Melissa for doing it every time though. So subtle yet impactful. Nice little mini gut punch to start the scene. This was the right call though. If anyone knows Tim like her it’s Angela. Lucy asking if she should alert Grey? Honestly she should've but here we are. That would've been a whole other set of problems though...

Lucy feels like she’s going insane so Angela validating her helps. (at first) You know she finds this behavior of his incredibly alarming. We can see the immediate worry painted across her face. That’s her brother. She loves that man like he’s one. What sucks is that, even though Angela is empathetic, she doesn’t fulfill the needs that Lucy is going for. Which is reassurance and 'Hey let’s do this together.' A united front. Hoping since he is acting off Angela's reply would be 'Let's find out why as a team.' She is protecting her but Lucy is in a heightened emotional state and doesn't see that. Only see's being shut out further from Tim.

Angela plays her cards very close to her chest. Like a good detective would. Sadly Lucy wanted more solace than just ‘Trust him.’ That’s all she’s been doing for days. Poor woman is going out of her damn mind with worry. Even tells Angela as such. The reply she gets back not what she wanted… She wanted her detective gut and friendship. Unfortunately she just gets the former. That short lived validation she got earlier dying off quickly. Lucy is so damn upset when she takes off from the convo. Knowing if she sticks around she’s going to cry on shift. My damn heart. Melissa be killing me. Holy hell.

Angela scaring the crap out of Tim is hilarious. Serves him right tbh. This episode had me so upset and twisted, I couldn’t even enjoy scruffy Tim in a leather jacket. You know something is wrong when I can’t gawk over this man. Angela has zero trouble finding him. Because well it’s her. This is why Lucy enlisted her. She needed the best to help her. Such best friend behavior from the minute she enters his car.

Drinking his soda, calling him out, and asking WTF is going on? I adore her brazen bravery. This is why we love Angela Lopez. Willing to get herself fired for him. That she can take the hit not Lucy. I mean she’s not wrong….Angela could easily live off Wes. She would hate it but she could. It's a more viable option. Says it can be ‘Wine o’clock for her.’ LOL I always enjoy them. More of them in s7 please writers.

Tim doesn’t argue with her reasoning. Starts to explain the whole Ray debacle. Why he can’t just let him go. What he has on him. That he needs to catch him in a new crime. So he has reason to actually arrest him. Once Tim fully explains Angela just replies. ‘I’m in.’ Tim is shocked because of course he is ha Even though she is his best friend he can't believe has his back like this. Oh my broken boy. He double checks and asks if she’s sure? Her reply being the absolute best. ‘Yeah. I got your back boo.’ Hehe Lucky she’s your best friend my love.

We rejoin our bestie duo at the docks. Scoping out Ray on whatever back door deals he’s doing. She is studying Tim hard in this scene. It’s the best. Angela tries to impart some logic to Tim. Saying he’s followed Ray for two days and nothing. Asking how long he’s going to do this? Tim replying the most Tim Bradford reply. ‘As long as it takes.’ Angela is on her game today and doesn’t let him get away with it. Saying he’s just going to walk away from his job? From his relationship with Lucy? All to arrest a guy he hasn’t thought about in over a decade?

Something isn’t adding up for her and she is letting him know it. Angela gives her patented look. Knowing it’s something more. There’s a reason she’s such a good detective. Woman knows how to get to the root of things. Tim has only given her surface info at this point. Definitely not enough to justify this crusade he’s currently on. Let’s him know Lucy would understand why he lied on the report. She would even commend him for it really. We know she would. She love his soft heart so much. Tim agrees and says she would still get in trouble for knowing and not reporting him to IA.

A risk she would gladly take if you’d let her Timothy… It’s here Angela digs a little deeper. He gets a second stare. Tim finding it aggravating and telling her as such. Angela let's her next truth bomb drop. Saying he’s doing it to protect himself as much as her. That there’s something he’s not admitting. Mic drop. Nailed it and Tim knows it but won’t entertain it further. Has him dead to rights and he knows it. We then get the glorious BFF line. Like it or not she is. lmao Has your number just like your girl.

We return to Angela’s for Tim to break our hearts some more. Theme of this episode. One punch after another. Literally no time to breathe unless you check out during the other SL's. Which I did tbh.... They’re alone so she probes Tim further. Knowing that it has to be so much more than a report. He wouldn't let Ray get under his skin like this if it was that shallow. That he's bearing the weight of something on his soul. Tim gives in and begrudgingly explains what happened. That he had been squad leader most of his tour. That he was looking to move up to Sergeant First Class. Only caveat was he couldn’t have any rampant criminality in his unit.

Ray was in the way of this. Tim decided to keep it within the squad if they caught him themselves. He did an unsanctioned mission… Oh Timothy….He explains how Ray called in an air strike on them. Did this the minute he knew he was trapped. Schmuck would rather take them with him. Such a cowards move. The way Tim describes the air strike. Ugh my heart. His eyes filling up as he depicts how the world imploded around them. Eric is a master of emotion here. So expressive. Looks like he is right back there, with the most haunted look on his face. He thought he was going to die. Being so vulnerable I wanna hug him.

He and Mark were lucky though. The Humvee took the hit for them. But Henderson and Coyle were ripped apart….Ugh and now we see what he’s been bearing. That he led his men to their deaths. Their loyalty and faith in him had cost them their lives. All because Tim was in pursuit of a promotion. For personal glory. Explains why he wouldn't praise himself or take awards pre-Lucy. Or advance his career before her either. He didn’t feel he deserved anything good. Because the last time that was important to him, he got two of his men killed. Imma go cry now.... My poor broken boy. The PTSD is so real.

Eric continues to rip my heart out. Telling Angela there was so much blood. I can't imagine seeing that. They for sure thought Ray was KIA. No way he survived. It’s the way he catches his breath, tears in his eyes in this next part. I'm so upset for him. The way he points at himself when he says leadership. The failure and shame he feels for what he did. When we found out it would be his military background I was excited. I knew it would be dark though. Whatever this was. But my god. I wasn’t expecting it to be this. But makes perfect sense why he’s kept it from Lucy. He can’t bring himself to forgive what he did. How could he expect Lucy to? To still look at him like he’s the same man she fell in love with?

The deep rooted shame is evident in this scene. This is quite the weight to keep on your soul. One I’m sure he’s never told anyone. Not even Isabel about I bet. My guess is he buried it once he was state side. Like most do with trauma. Hoping it would never resurface. Sadly not how trauma goes... The way he tells the story it’s for the first time. You can tell. He’s right back there re-living it all. This scene gives us so much insight to Tim as a person. Why he is the way he is as a cop. As a person. It explains why he lost his damn mind in 2x01 over Lucy falsifying the report. Probably brought him right back there.

This is a very revealing scene. It makes sense why he shoulders things alone. It’s punishment for what he did. Doesn’t think anyone could love him enough to shoulder it with him. That breaks my damn heart. This ep makes me so emotional. *sad sigh* Nothing scarier than the person you love seeing you at your worst. With his background of abuse, it makes sense why he’s hidden this from Lucy. He doesn’t feel worthy of the comfort she would bring him. Only shame that he made a mistake. Tim is very self loathing and this is why. Coupled with his childhood it makes so much sense why he is the way he is…This one is emotionally heavy af. All his unchecked trauma barreling through like a bullet train in this ep.

Lucy arrives home and Tamara is there to take care of her. Saying she ordered pizza. I love this. She needed this. Lucy leaves the room to drop off her stuff. We hear a knock at the door and it’s Ray.... Earlier he scanned Tim’s vehicle and got Lucy’s address. Which made me sick to my stomach. I knew him grabbing it was going to end this way. Best way to get to Tim is through his heart. When Tamara opened the door and it was him..The hairs at the back of my neck stood up. Tamara calls out for Lucy. She emerges and goes into protect mode right away. Eyes on Tamara first but also hating her gun is locked up.

Heart was in my damn throat the entire time. Lucy handles herself like the bad ass we’ve all come to know and love. Commend her for keeping herself composed when she was terrified. I also adore her not putting up with any of his scare tactic BS. Her line about the only call she’s gonna make is for the ambulance. Like hot damn Lucy. Way to protect Tamara and yourself. It's true she could take his scrawny ass easily. I long to be the confident BAMF she is.

Doesn't hurt she’s still got the rage burning from being in the dark. So not only is her life being threatened now Tamara's is. This is Lucy's FINAL straw. It’s now bled over in the worst way. Not only that but she still has no idea what’s going on. We can see that mama bear come out loud and proud. It’s one thing for her to be involved it’s a whole other thing with Tamara dragged in. This is what pushes her to reach out To Tim. To cut his crap. Whatever this is has now endangered an innocent life. One she loves fiercely and will die to protect.

Lucy RAGE calls Tim and unleashes hell. As she should… Demanding to know where his ass is. Tim knowing he can’t hold her back any longer. So he lets her know. I mean Lucy is million percent done with this crap now. With his behavior, him cutting her out, all of it. So very very done. Rightfully so. I do love him answering ‘Hey, what’s wrong?’ Knowing she wouldn’t be calling unless something was. He for sure would’ve dropped it all to go to her.

But she was way too pissed to see that fact. She shows up like a bat out of hell. Biting his head off immediately saying 'Does she look ok?' No….she does not. Forever love Angela escorting Tamara out of the room. Mom and dad about to have it out so let's go. The concern all over his face kills me though. This was the last thing he wanted to happen. The very thing he was striving for by shutting her out backfired horribly. Not only did he endanger her but Tamara too.

It was Lucy’s final straw and she is showing it. These were the types of fights that are needed though. As much as this hurts she is fighting him to save them. Because he is worth the bother and effort. Just like he stated in 5x08. Asking why her and Chris never fight?They’re fighting against each other to protect one another it kills me. Also you know your ship has chemistry when even their fights are lightning in a bottle goodness. Just as amazing as their happy stuff. I can't speak enough to their fantastic on-screen chemistry. Even though this fight is fiery and hurts to watch it's hurts so good to watch them hash it out.

Tim explains who Ray is and Lucy don’t give a single fuck. It’s not who he is that has her raging. It’s him cutting her out that is. I love the movements Melissa does in this scene. I know she had an interview about her being mad. Thinking she was awkward. It wasn't at all. Was so real. I think she nailed it. Her body language is on point. How she stamps her foot. Shouting how who Ray is doesn’t explain why he iced her out. At all. She is VIBRATING with anger. Yelling at Tim to stop protecting her. Which he won't. That is like asking him to stop breathing tbh. He would rather die than not protect her. Ugh his reply of ‘ I can’t. I won’t.’ They’re at odds with the deepest part of their souls. Of who they are.

Tim will never stop protecting her. Just as she will never stop trying to help him. Been in her DNA from the jump. For him to not let her is just as painful as Tim not protecting her. *sigh* This is where their intense need to protect each other backfires so badly. Sounds romantic and sometimes it is. But in these type of moments, it shows the cracks in their already fractured communication. It real though. Communicating is HARD. Especially when you both come from abusive homes where that wasn't taught. If you aren't taught healthy communication you're just not going to do it. Simple as that. It's like a muscle that never gets used. Then when it does it feels so unnatural and painful.

These two are going to be the death of me. Hell they already have been. They have so much to work on in s7. It’s insane. I'm excited for it though. Lucy then brings up how Lopez was read in but not her. She is HIS PERSON. If anyone should be read in it’s her. Consequences be damned. Yeah Angela does have less to lose but that is NOT the point. Tim is clearly not getting that fact. I adore Lucy grabbing his hands during the end of the scene. Mirroring back she 'Can’t and won’t' not help him. Telling him she is over being to good girlfriend. He’s going to let her in NOW. Oooh lord. You Tell 'em Luce.

Their OP to foil Ray goes off without a hitch. Tim tells him it’s over. That there isn’t an air stroke to save him this time. Ray tells Tim ‘I am the air strike. I’m about to blow up your whole life.’ *grumble* It’s so true on many many levels. Watching Tim be so stoic in his IA investigation kills me. Wish could've fit this in. Eric be out here again making me emotional af two eps in a row. You can see the tears in his eyes but the rest of him is controlled. That military background of his coming in clutch.

it pains me to watch him lie and have it destroy him. I remember I saw people saying how could he lie? That’s not like him. Um no. This is very like Tim. Not to lie but to protect those he loves. If lying protects Lucy and Lopez that’s what he’s going to do. He has a history of being a little gray for those he loves. Isabel is a good example of that. All that went down with Detective Murphy was similar to this. ‘Some things matter more.’ Once again rings true with him. Tim is believed over Ray. Because even if Tim doesn’t want to believe this he is the better man.

Better reputation and Percy closes the investigation. Have missed him. But whoever he’s around it’s not good. Love the actor though. What happens after is rough to say the least. Never seen Grey as disappointed in Tim as he is here. Reprimanding him and having to report him to Pine SUCKS. R.I.P. Metro Tim. I loved you so…It’s killing Tim to have Grey look at him this way. Deeply respects him and to be scolded by him cuts him. Just dismisses Tim without further comment or fight….

God almighty the song playing in the background. I don’t even remember it. I only watched this scene once. I think I blacked out a lot in this moment. The immense shock rocked my system. Suffice to say it’s beautiful. The piano, the haunting oohs and lyrics are the perfect backdrop to this devastating scene. I felt this building anxiety watching this scene. Waiting for the hammer to drop. When she pulled him into her arms *phew* It was first breath I had taken in nearly two episodes. These eps had me on the razor's edge of sanity. I love her waiting outside for him and instantly pulling him into her arms. Just like Tim did for her in 5x22. I'm fine.....Imma cry as I write this. Horse heaven playing in my ears right now. Adding to my emotional state. These two getting me all weepy.

I’ll be honest I thought if a break up was coming, it was coming from Lucy the first time. Which is why this devastated me like it did. Having the full season in hand now. Makes total sense it’s Tim. At the time I thought would be her. But that wouldn’t be like Lucy at all. After everything he put her through. The secrets, the lies and shutting her out. She had every damn right. But she loves this man unconditionally. So unconditionally. Everything Lucy does in this scene is a reflection of that unconditional love. There to pick up his broken pieces despite all of that went down. Look at her in those gifs above.

Especially that second one. First time she took a breath too. So grateful to be here for him in this moment. I truly thought ‘Oh. Maybe we’re ok... She’s hugging him.’ Encasing him in her arms. Trying to absorb all of his hurt. Supporting him the way he sought out days previous. Gently cradling him against her. It's the tender way she nestled her fingers at the back of his head that gets me. Tapping into some ship crack for me there. *phew* Honestly thought with her being there for him they would make it out unscathed. I truly did. The chemistry from this hug is unreal btw. Tim doesn’t feel worthy in the least. The way he slumps against her. Doesn’t really hug her back like normal. Can't see Lucy is so willing to absorb his hurt and pain. To love him through this. This hug is beautifully tragic.

Lucy releases him and he looks as broken as I’ve ever seen him. 4x09 x 1000 tbh. He shirks away from her. Hands in his pocket. So disgusted and ashamed with himself. Something l've learned in Pilates is posture and the importance of it. When you stand tall and at full height. You are confident and sure of yourself. When you are slumped it presents a lack of confidence, shame, and feeling unworthy. His posture is screaming that. Like he feels he shouldn’t even be in her presence right now. He crushes me with how he says he lied about everything.

Then sarcastically almost sardonically follows it up with ‘But hey it saved my job….’ The amount of disdain in his voice is gut wrenching. The whole reason he was in this Ray mess was to further himself. To keep his career intact. He saw a promotion and went for it at all costs. What he just did lying to IA was to be that same man again. (In his mind) To put his career first over what’s right. Risked people's lives again as well. People he loves. Sickens him ten years later he’s doing the same thing all over again. Even though it's so different this time. There is still nobility in it with saving Lucy and Lopez. But this man can't see that right now. Doesn't see any good in this situation or himself.

Lucy does her best to sympathize. Telling him it was an impossible situation. If it had been her she would’ve done the same thing. Thing is if it had been for Tim yes she would’ve without question. But he can’t see the forest for the trees atm. He is drowning absolutely drowning in his self-loathing. Tim continues on with the painful self flogging. Telling her she would’ve never been in his position. Putting her on a pedestal while he makes himself very very small. That OTP line from 6x03 from him 'You could never disappoint me.' That is true. The problem is he doesn't realize he could never disappoint her either. Tragically Tim doesn't view it that way. Only sees he's not worthy.

Lucy once again tries to pick up his pieces. Telling him he thought he could handle it. He was wrong but made it right. It’s like she can sense him pulling away in this moment. Doing her best to calm his fears about himself. Trying to do what she’s always done in years past best. Build him up. Soothe him. Sadly she isn’t gaining an inch of ground with him. He is stuck in how he feels and there is no budging him. Tim is morose saying he wishes it was that easy….We can see the incredible amount hurt on his face. Telling her he just lied to two men he deeply respects. He is coming undone rapidly and Lucy can see it. I adore her putting her hands on him. Trying to right his ship.

Ground him to her in this moment. Because once again it's something she’s done so well in the past. Tim is spiraling so hard he can’t see her gesture for what it is. Tells her he just betrayed everything he thought was right about himself. *heart clutch* Lucy can’t stand him talking down about himself. Tries to interrupt but Tim won’t allow it. Lucy graciously nods and lets him get it out. Especially when he tells her how hard this is for him. She is so wonderfully understanding it makes my heart ache. Tim feels like he is a bad guy. Thought he had gotten past this and was sucked back in so easily. Truly believed he had become a better person since then. (He has) Ray was right he was gonna blow up his entire life.

He just exposed Tim for the fraud he already felt he was. Bringing his greatest sin to light. Bringing up feelings of not being deserving. Of inadequacy. His abuse background pulling into the station and not leaving. Tim is back to a place of massive self loathing. Saying he has been lying to himself for years. Thinking he’s gotten better when he hasn’t. To him he reverted back to the man he thought he left behind. Not only that he put his person. The woman he loves at risk to cover up his past. To cover up his shame. It’s hitting him like a freight train of terrible realization. Continuing on to say he can’t go back to the way it was. I was hopeful when he said ‘Right now.’ Then followed it up with maybe never….

Lucy had been nodding along. Being so wonderfully empathetic and understanding. She was with him till he said that. Then she is hit with her own terrible realization. He’s leaving her. She is losing him. In the same parking lot where he told her to take a risk. Where she expressed her concern over losing him if they did. Worried about losing the most important relationship in her life due that risk. The same spot where he told her 'Unless it is.' A giant stab to our collective shipper hearts.

It's why Lucy is in a state of utter shock. As we all were tbh. She shakily asks him if he’s breaking up with her? When he said I’m sorry. I remember having to pause. Freak out and cry. I recall chanting ‘No no no….’ To myself repeatedly. My dog was very alarmed. Because I was distraught af. I couldn't believe this was really happening. My happy place was being decimated before my eyes.

Look at the range of emotions on Tim's face before he delivers that line though. Eric you why you doing this to me? They blow this scene out the damn water. it's so visceral. and raw. He looks like he's about to have a breakdown before he delivers that line. Battling with himself about it. There's a desperate need to want to stay with her. But his self doubt and hatred wins out knowing he isn't deserving. Do I think he came out thinking he was going to do this? A little. I think the more he spoke about it and himself the decision was made. He wasn't going to be be talked off this ledge.

The way Lucy replies after this rips my heart out. This break up feels like death by a thousand paper cuts. Months later and this hurts just as much as the first time. Lucy doesn't hold back in the least. Telling Tim he doesn't get to do that. Her line about using it as an excuse is so spot on. This Ray situation has hit VERY close to home for Tim. An insanely sensitive subject for him. It's rubbed against a wound that never really healed properly. Just was buried in the back of his mind.

He doesn’t have the capacity or emotional maturity to handle it. So he ejects out as a coping mechanism. Lucy calls his ass right away for it. It’s so painful to her that he is doing this excuse. Because it feels like a crappy cheat to them. To her. It's truly a cop out and our girl deserves better than this. Especially after all they’ve been through together. All that rapport and trust they’ve built over the years. It’s an insult to who they are as a couple and the relationship they’ve developed. Sadly that all vanishes in this moment. It’s stunning Lucy and straight murdering my feels.

Her ‘That's not okay.’ is a dagger to my shipper heart. The way she continues to repeat herself cause she's in shock. Ugh.This goes down as one of the most painful breakups I've had to go through. Lucy is so upset he is going this route. Melissa had a great interview (quite a few actually.) About the lie line and using it as an excuse for Tim. She noted Lucy is upset cause how he’s acting isn’t them. That they get to have these conversations. Not only have them but recover and grow from them. It’s what she expecting from him in this moment. It's what she expected from his 5x08 Mantra going into this relationship.

She is telling him I’ve got your back. I’ve got you. What are you doing? What happened to ‘Unless it is?’ Lucy continues to vehemently disagree with him. As she should. The worst part is Tim says ‘I know.’ Like he knows what he’s doing is wrong. Knows to eject after everything isn’t ok. Yet he can’t stop himself. He is not emotionally mature enough to handle this conversation properly. Also too blinded by his own self-hatred to see the unconditional love she is showing for him in this moment. God this is painful.

Tim then comes in with the breakup line of ‘You’re an incredible person.' Lucy can’t believe this shit . She really can’t. That Tim is is doing this to her. To them. Even though Tim is being genuine with his statement. You can hear it in his voice. Doesn't do anything to soothe the wounds he's causing. Once again Melissa crushing it with the upset body language. The mannerisms are so on point. Maybe it's because I'm Italian and I use my hands when I'm upset. I do exactly what she's doing. Why I appreciate it so much. It's so real.

It's a cop out what he is doing. 'It’s not you it’s me' schtick. We see the anger building in Lucy. She can't even look at him in the second gif. For him to toss away what they have is painful enough. To do it based off a cliched excuse is destroying Lucy. Thinking what they had was worth so much more than this. Thought they worth the nasty fights. No way she knows fully what happened or she would figure out why he's really doing this. That’s what makes the rest of Lucy's replies so god damn tragic. She is trying to hold onto him for dear life. But is only being pushed away in return...

Tim continues to push forward with this breakup. Letting her know she deserves better than him. It's SO much deeper than that but it's the only way he can convey it right now. Her ‘Oh my god…’ This is her worst nightmare. Her biggest fear come to life. This is why she hesitated starting this relationship. Why she was so afraid of risking her most important relationship. It's unfolding before her eyes and she can’t stop it.

Like a bad dream she can't seem to wake up from. We all wish we could...Tim has never felt worthy of Lucy’s love, light or praise. This reaction just proves that. It's been building for a long time and this is the final result of it. It’s not logical but a trauma brain rarely is. The amount of emotional and physical abuses he endured growing up left it's mark. Has him truly convinced Lucy could never love him knowing what he did. Tim feels he does not deserve her comfort, support or love.

Punishing himself and denying what he need most because he feels unworthy. Thinks he has made a mistake so grave there is no coming back for him. No way she could love him if she knew. So he like Angela stated earlier Tim is protecting himself. Pains me to watch. Now as I've said before it's not to excuse but to explain his side of it. I understand why he's doing it even if it's fucked up.

He doesn't give Lucy much more than she deserves better. Tells her it's why he's walking away. This man feels so undeserving of the love she has to give. In his mind he thinks he’s doing her a kindness. To separate herself from such a shameful and broken man. That she could do better than him. To Tim he made the biggest sin and can’t live with himself about it. He can't envision a world where Lucy would love him through it. The tragedy is she already was in this scene.

Lucy isn’t hearing any of it. Full on panic spiral that I shared in this moment. Her ‘Don’t do this. Why are you doing this?’ Is the most soul crushing part. She can feel him slipping through her hands. Like sand rushing through her fingertips. She can’t hold onto a grain of him. Can only stand there as he gives up on them. His face in the third gif...Knife to my soul. *screams into a pillow* It's killing him to walk away from her. Eric and his expressive eyes has me bawling. The quiver in his bottom lip as well. Gah it hurts to watch them both in so much pain. It’s the way she pulls away with one hand, but is clutching his other hand for dear life, that really gets me in that last gif.

Asking him once again why are you doing this? I shared that sentiment in this moment.. Tim stands firm in his decision to end them and rip all of our hearts out. Eric had a great quote about how Tim handed this whole thing. ‘He is impulsive and he reacts instead of thinking things through. And it can come out as a bit too strong.’ He feels he is a burden Lucy therefore he is removing himself. Not thinking about the damage it’s going to do to her. The immense regret he’s going to feel when he regulates a bit more.

Something therapy has taught me is we are ruled by our nervous system. Anxiety, stress, fear etc Tim’s was haywire in this moment. All of them going off at once. Not thinking clearly. Acting out of fight or flight. He took the flight option unfortunately. The tragic way he grabs her head and gives her the saddest head kiss. Shattering all of our hearts in the process. It’s the devastated look on his face when he strokes her hair and takes off. One final gut punch from him. It's like he’s leaving behind his greatest treasure and can’t bear to be around it any longer. Lucy is clutching to him until he departs. *snifffle*

The man actually thinks she is better off without him. Truly believes that. Even if Lucy had succeeded it keeping Tim, this would've reared it’s ugly head again down the road. This breakup ruined my friggin life. I kid you not. They were my happy place. My consistent happy place. And now that was gone. It affected my mental health a little too not gonna lie. I think I was in mourning for three weeks. Honestly I still am. Low key will be till they're fixed. Those three weeks were unbearable. But also needed. Thank you again to my bestie D for being my mourning partner through out that. Kept me sane.

That being said I think this will push them in the best direction. A healthier and stronger one. I truly believe that. I recently broke up with a friend who I had been friends with for ten years. It was very hard on me but time. Boundaries were being pushed and it wasn't healthy anymore. My therapist pointed me to a wonderful book called ‘Goodbyes and good boundaries. ’ While It helped heal my heart it also has really good pieces in it. Stuff made me think of this very ep tbh. Sure that wasn't her goal LOL But my brain is always in a Chenford state of mind in some way or another.

First one that made me think of them. ‘Health cannot bond to unhealth.’ As much as it wasn’t fair for Lucy. And god it wasn’t after everything else this season. Tim was in such a radioactive state staying with her wouldn’t have worked anyway. He was radiating turmoil. Lucy can do a lot for him but not this. He NEEDED therapy so much. There are things you learn in there that only your therapist can help you with. He was unhealth and Lucy was trying to keep her empathetic healthy self to him. It was never going to work. Not unless Tim put in some work. Which he couldn't at this point in time.

“Relationship often die not because of conversations never had but rather conversations needed but never had.” Another good one made me think of them. Tim was not ready in the least for the adult conversation required of him in this moment. Or their entire relationship really. They both danced around the issues a lot. 6x02 closest we got. Even then it was one sided. Thus them dying in this moment. Despite Lucy’s damndest to keep them afloat. Remind him of what they’re fighting for. Of why they started this. This breakup was painful af. Despite how this wrecked my world it’s going to be good for them in the long run.

I will say Lucy in that last gif was all of us in that moment. It was a soul crushing moment that decimated this fandom. Still blows my mind Melissa and Eric were surprised just how insanely devastated we were. Why they did those lovely posts during the three weeks. To thank us and to hold on. Growth is coming. They’re going to be even better after this. Doesn’t mean this didn’t hurt like a SOB and won’t long after they reunite. Curse you Eric and Melissa. You are incredible to evoke such emotions out of us all.

Thank you for going through this with me again. It wasn’t easy but they always worth it. Appreciate any and all comments, likes or reblogs I get. I shall see you all in 6x07 :)

Side notes non chenford

Balian doing the creepy bed thing again. Just have to note that.

Also can’t believe they didn’t end the ep with their breakup. There is a whole minute or so of I don’t give a shit after that scene. I was so distraught they could’ve had Nolan walk into a wall and I wouldn't have noticed.

[6ad6ro]

my review of each game in UFO 50: BARBUTA - intentionally "hard and obtuse to reflect the era", but imo it works. haven't gotten far but i really appreciate it. BUG HUNTER - kinda hated it at first, but wound up really liking it once i understood the basics. NINPEK - controls great. appreciate the mr goemon inspiration. but sadly way too hard. PAINT CHASE - a fine game. sorta like pacman. MAGIC GARDEN - a really cool take on snake. took a minute to warm up to it tho. give it a chance. MORTOL - what a cool idea! lemmings combined with a platformer. gets hard fast but fine. VELGRESS - inverted downwell? it's neat. super hard but i'm just bad at it lol. PLANET ZOLDATH - an awesome bitesized roguelike. this game is sick, don't skip it. ATTACTICS - i'm too stupid to play this. but also i don't really want to learn. just okay. DEVILITION - seems more interesting than attactics, but i want to play it even less. KICK CLUB - bubble bobble clone, seems amazing at first. but all too quickly turns into tedious bullethell drop puzzles. after world 2 you'll wanna stop playing. too bad. AVIANOS - hard but kickass strategy game. has game customization and difficulty settings! MOONCAT - a big reason to buy ufo 50. weird and great! BUSHIDO BALL - do you like windjammers? this game kicks ass. gets real hard tho. BLOCK KOALA - i've never liked sokoban and i never will. seems fine if you do. CAMOUFLAGE - didn't wanna give it a chance at first, but it seems alright. lil stealth game. CAMPANELLA - it's probably a fine game but i hate playing it. maybe if it had a healthbar? GOLFARIA - amazing idea executed poorly. i wish i liked this more, but it's annoying to play. THE BIG BELL RACE - campanella combined with super off road (or sprint). better than campanella, but that "touch the walls and die" shit makes it way worse than it's inspirations. WARPTANK - seems cool. i def need to spend more time with it. WALDORF'S JOURNEY - good, cute game. hard but small scale, making it very fun. PORGY - an even bigger reason to buy ufo 50. small scale metroidvania. cherried it. ONION DELIVERY - god, what were they thinking? has so much potential but wayyy too hard. CARAMEL CARAMEL - such a good game ruined by a two-hit gameover. booooooo. PARTY HOUSE - this game is just really really good. hard to explain, just try it. HOT FOOT - imagine if super dodgeball had shit controls. why does my player autoswitch? i may never give it another chance… DIVERS - weird swimming rpg. i need to give it more time, but seems ok so far. (skipped over next 5) FIST HELL - a final fight clone? hell yes! but then i realized it was more like playing final fight on hardest setting with a single credit. aka "not fun". another example of a good game mossmouth ruined by making it too hard. (skipped over next 10) PILOT QUEST - tied with porgy for being my fav so far. zelda 1 combined with crafting. but you gain resources even when playing other games. kicks ass, PLAY THIS FIRST. cherried. (skipped mini and max) COMBATANTS - tbh i heard it sucked so i jumped ahead to it. they were right… (yet to play final 4) ??? - awesome but can't talk about it.

i'll update with the rest of the games once i try em.

[vide0-nasties]

THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME EMILY @lemon-bats 🥰🥰

1. Were you named after anyone?

To the best of my knowledge no, at least for my real name! My internet name, Rags, I actually just ended up snagging from one of my OCs - a washed up rockstar named Cosimo Ragatz, who was a recovering drug addict that founded an indie record label with his wife.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Oh god, it was some time last week?? So much real life stuff had piled up and I think it was honestly some kind of mini-break or smth, god only knows. But I’m feeling better now lol.

3. Do you have kids?

ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOT LMAO. My mom passed when I was young and I raised my younger siblings, I’ve done my time in the child rearing mines and I’m never doing it again.

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

For a really long time I rode horses and I was a really good three day eventer. I also really loved archery and swimming. I also rode dirt bikes too, and I’d love to get back into it!! 🥰🥰

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Yes indeed!! But I’m not sure that I use it as much as I used to. Not for any particular reason, I don’t think dgheh.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

I’m boring and predictable and I pretty much always notice height first 😂😂 I do also notice face shapes and noses, though!!

7. What’s your eye color?

Dark brown that leans pretty close to black dfhjd.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Each have their own benefits and negatives!! A time and a place for everything 👏👏

9. Any talents?

I’m a good writer, and I’m pretty good at accents! I also like to think I’m the funniest asshole in any given room at any time 😂😅

10. Where were you born?

Commonwealth of Virginia babeyyyyy 🦩 there aren’t cardinal emojis, but I’m still barely south enough to be southern lol.

11. What are your hobbies?

I like posting video games, writing, playing dnd, a lil bit of digital art. Painting my nails. Dfhjd. Running outta stuff here, uhhhh. Panicking trying to remember my meds, but that’s more a full time occupation lol.

12. Do you have any pets?

Four dogs (a cocker spaniel, a border collie, a pit bull, and a boxer lab 🥰🥰), some barn cats, and a little grade paint horse named Rooster who’s a complete ASSHOLE.

13. How tall are you?

5’6” or 5’7”, it depends on how tall I want to feel that day dghjd

14. Favorite subject in school?

History and English!!! I really wanted to be a historical researcher for a career when I was in school and I still think about it. I would’ve liked to study Appalachian history from pre-Civil War to present.

15. Dream job?

LOL 😂😂 historical researcher, possibly an author, or a rare and antique jewelry shop owner siiigh. I really fell in love with fine jewelry at my last job, and I would DIE to be able to do it again, but in a much more niche fashion.

No Pressure tags: @smoggyfogbottom @brilliantblasphemer @dotcie @kastlequill @skinnyazn @snail-eggs @lunarvicar @siriusleee 💖💖

[ocelot-t]

do have any Hazbin Hotel or just RadioRose headcanons? Like Rosie being a really good painter or Alastor technically being younger than he seems or something? (I just like reading other people's ideas on their favorite characters lol)

You arrived just in time.

There will be a lot of words I have mostly a lot of disconnected thoughts in my head, which I sometimes consciously or unconsciously implement in drawings. besides, I don't remember what the canon is, and what the old fanon is, to be honest. If you would like me to, I can share not only my headcanons, but also some of the AUs I have.

I understand where the theory comes from, but I don't like the idea of Alastor being forced to smile all this time. I think he wants to keep everything under his control so much that he smiles even in death. The idea that he is just a sick man, serial killer makes his eternal smile even more unnerving. I don't want to justify him.

I think Al would have enjoyed reading H.P Lovecraft’s works. The tentacled creatures and descriptions of people as nonentities suffering defeat in a fight with chthonic creatures... btw, some of Lovecraft's stories were published during Alastor's era. I have a small headcanon about Alastor's death, and I plan to create a comic in the future (if I can actually get it done).

There are 2 possible deaths of Alastor's mother in my mind, and I’m uncertain which one I want to illustrate. maybe both continuing the theme of Alastor’s human life. I sincerely believe that even if Alastor had really had an abusive father, Al would have been cruel since childhood. Guess what? I have an unfinished little comic with a hum!Al by another artist, and I'm uncertain when I’ll manage to complete it. The headcanon that suggests Alastor’s father is an abuser already seems like a canon; however, I don’t want to portray him as a completely terrible person. I like the idea of Alastor enjoying hunting, so let's say he learned it from his father. Just like all the dad jokes. on the other hand, as for the scars on Alastor, some of them probably came from his father, since domestic violence was a common problem. Regarding art, as you might have noticed, I have a headcanon that Al understands the arts in general, whether it's painting, cinema, or music. Perhaps I think this way only because I am trying to combine things I love very much. I imagine him as a person you could have a discussion about these topics with??? It seems to me that Alastor and Rosie would often discuss these topics over a glass of wine or a cup of tea. Suddenly, Alastor would show up at Rosie's and instead of hello I READ ABOUT FRA FILIPPO LIPPI. DO YOU HAVE AN HOUR FREE? BTW I HOPE YOU WATCHED THAT DZIGA VERTOV MOVIE THAT I RECOMMENDED Rosie would love art nouveau and I don't know rococo? and Alastor would be like no art nouveau is okay, cute, but rococo is bullshit. *2-hour episode of drunken dad teaching life* Continuing on the topic of artists, I repeat myself, I have a silly unfinished series of mini-comics about Alastor and Rosie as art academy students, the plots of which are based on real life (almost). I have thought about what kind of styles they would draw in, what kind of themes they would focus on, and so on. Again, there is a lot of text here already, so I'll wrap up this topic for now. P.S. I have a strange idea in my head about how to imagine Alastor in the USSR in the 10-30s. It was quite fun there: the World War I, the revolution, the civil war, the post-revolutionary years, famines and so on, and so on. For fun, of course, but Alastor the Communist has a good reason to hate Vox the Capitalist and his MMM I mean VVV or Lucifer the emperor of hell, if you know what I mean. Instead of telling dad jokes, he would say that life under Stalin was good and quote Lenin. Of course, these are all jokes, but I did have some abstract thoughts about how his life and his family's life would be arranged. However, I don't know enough about the history of USSR to actually implement this properly. so yeah

[munchboxart]

Yay I finally finished binging Adventure Time. It's going to feel really weird going back to normal because I spent like 6 whole days binging AT. Although I did do it out of order. I started from Stakes (a little after season 7) then when I finished season 10, I went back to 1.

It wasn't as bad as I thought. I initially thought seasons 1-4 were going to be kind of cringey since season 1 stuff + Finn's romance issues. I forgot that they were more episodic than a consistent thing, like the later seasons. None of them were that cringey if at all I think, at worst it was boring. Though, I do think Incendium is still probably the worst one for me.

I still kind of think Finn in Incendium was a little out of character? Most of the episodes it seemed like he had a crush on PB but not strong enough to act on it. Like, the confusion between infatuation and respect(?) for an older figure. I don't know, but Finn outside of his relationship issue is good.

I think season 6 is the best personally? They had a really good streak of episodes in the middle. I'd like to count season 7 but it's heavily because of Stakes LOL. Season 1 was definitely the worst but it's more so because it was boring, but it was just starting to get it's identity, so I can't blame them.

The only episodes I've skipped are pretty much the Fionna and Cake ones. I should've watched them but god I don't want to. Especially since I plan on binging Fionna and Cake again, along with Distant Lands maybe.

Just a few random things out of order as I think:

I am shocked how very little Neptr episodes there are. Also the fact he was gone for 4-5 SEASONS.....

Also shocked that Susan Strong had very little episodes too (prior to Islands). I thought they did more episodes with her but I guess not

Jermaine too actually. I actually never watched the episode "Jermaine" prior to my binge, but wow he was stressed the fuck out. I'm glad he picked up painting. Margret and Joshua too

Billy too.......... I think they all got enough episodes though. 1 strong episode for each one, rather than none at all

I'm surprised that Marceline wasn't as "evil" as I remembered. She really is more like an older sibling type towards Finn and Jake when they were younger

Finn starting to call Ice King "Simon" in season 4, right after Holly Jolly secrets (I can't remember if it was exactly the next appearance Ice King had) was sweet

Lemongrab is not that bad as I had remembered. It's kind of nice that he chilled out after merging with his clone. Kind of like reaching acceptance at the end of Mountain of Matthew

Phoebe and Cinnamon Bun hanging out together was such a good idea. I have so much respect for Cinnabun. Also watching the episode with my friends, where Finn keeps trying to get back together with Phoebe while Cinnabun was there and outrizzed (for a lack of better words) Finn was extremely funny. Let it go man 😭

Speaking of which, Finn's spiral from breaking up with Phoebe was... Pretty bad. I actually didn't remember why Phoebe broke up with him but good god that was... Bad. Also him going on a kissing spree with every princess 😭😭😭😭

I actually never knew Jake and Lady Rainicorn never married. They're still boyfriend and girlfriend even after having kids. Cool detail

It felt like they finally got their footing by season 4, which is really strange to say since they had like... 3 seasons with 26(?) episodes each. But the voice direction and feel definitely became more consistent

The OST is a little crazier than I remembered. I think the later seasons went a little more subtle but the earlier seasons were a lot louder (in terms of expression) and kind of like Katamari

Magic Man is a bigger dick than I remembered. Also Rap Bear fucking sucks no wonder you lost to your son

For a long time, I don't understand why people hate(?) or dislike Islands, even now. I thought it was pretty decent... At worst it was boring but I thought it was a decent mini-series. Definitely ranked last out of the mini-series though

It's awesome that they had guest animators on to animate 1 episode each. I think the staff really liked Food Chain, though. They referenced it at least twice I think, along with referencing the song. Though, it is the one that had the most "symbolism". Also, I really like Masaaki Yuasa in general, he's made one of my favorite movies. I don't remember if any other franchises have done that (aside from ones that run for more than 10 seasons), but they might have not run long enough or be big enough to do so.

I'm shocked Football is a season 7 episode. I legit thought it was a season 5 thing. Also it was the last episode I watched before finishing the binge

Late addition but Finn, Bubblegum and Marcie having family issues is just so. Fitting? The other word is relatable but I don't like using that word. There's also comfortable, as in its comforting knowing these characters I like also have the same issues. But yeah, it just makes sense

I think I can see why people were mad or didn't like that Adventure Time got more story driven by season 7-10, but I think with growing up and Adventure Time getting less episodes, it just made sense to peter out. I did wish we got more episodes but I think I'm happy with how it is. I wouldn't change a thing

[3gremlins]

"fuecoco with skeledirge"

just some little fire croc pokemon hanging out with their parent in the swamp :)

i wanted to do something really bright and a little graphical instead of semi-realistic and these seemed kind of perfect for it. Skeledirge is usually all white but I liked the idea of dividing its body up into a scale like pattern and doing different colors for each bit. I tried to keep the washes light so its body would still read lighter than its mouth.

(painting really light/white things is kind of boring for me, if i can put more colors in i will lol)

patron reward painting, 8 x 10" ($60 tier, folks on this tier give me a list of pokemon or animals they'd like and i work off of it throughout the year, they also get a mini painting each month as well)

[firinnie]

MYTH-TOBER 2024 11. Thanatos So there will be a bit of mythology and a bit of my life story here. Thanatos as the deity of peaceful death is very interesting, he comes, cuts a lock of your hair and then Hermes could do the rest. He has a twin brother Hypnos and oh boy, the old paintings of them are so cute. Check out "Hypnos and Thanatos: Sleep and His Half-Brother Death" by John William Waterhouse, excellent one. Btw, he got butterfly's antennae because that's his sacred animal, which is also a symbol of the soul. BUT now some lore from my life. Mythology somehow stuck with me for a long time, once in primary school when we talked about Greek gods each of us got our own god for which we were supposed to dress up and talk about. I got Thanatos and I'll tell you that 10 years ago I couldn't find almost anything on the Polish internet. A very short Wikipedia and a few pictures, because nobody spoke English at my house at the time, so my mother took matters into her own hands. She was a seamstress and sewed me a black and white outfit (the one Thanatos is wearing on my art), bought angel-costume wings and helped me paint them black, attaching even more feathers to make them bigger. And believe me, how much she heard from my grandmother that it was "a profanation of religion" and so on. On day we were supposed to present it, I was late for my first lesson because I was doing the most "deadly" make-up that the cheap cosmetics we found at the last minute would allow me to do. And I had a phenomenal performance, I even walked around the room with my paper knife painted gold in one hand and a paper torch in the other. I had "diabełki" (little devils) in it, which were gunpowder wrapped in parchment, wrapped in small balls. You could buy these at kiosks and when you hit the ground with them there was a mini BOOM, I used them at the end of my presentation for t h e w o w effect. And you know what? I got a 4- (which is like B in a Polish school), and you know why? Because "it's very unsightly to watch a girl pretending to be a male character". BUT I DID NOT CHOOSE A MALE CHARACTER, that teacher gave us gods, I had no choice in with one! 12-year-old me was sad and 22-year-old me is disgusted by that woman. But you know what? I went to an art school after that and there was an "initiation as a student lit party" (which always had an interesting theme at that school), we of course got a topic about Greek mythology. I put on my Thanatos outfit, went to the bathroom to do my make-up and met a girl from my class who I hadn't talked to, and who commented on something about my costume. We started talking and talking and talking... 3 years ago we finished this school and she is still my close friend so I can say that the effort of making this costume really paid off. Thanks to my mom lol. I really like Thanatos for that. Inctober by @/arkhaos.art (on ig)

[zeherili-ankhein]

After an successful first day of my new new academic year, here are some things I wanted to share... (Continuation of this part)

— The classroom sucks.

— The new class teacher is nice, I like her uwu... She takes Geography, so I hope that subject would become some what easier lol

— Sociology sounded easy and interesting... Though somehow a little boring, but that might be because I was just super sleep deprived t-t

— Only 15 minutes break time, that also got shortened by 5 minutes, because of the English teacher's bhasan 😭

No complains... I like her, she's a really sweet person >·<

— MY CLASS 1 BUDDY IS IN MY CLASS XD, but also she's like the only one I know in my class 🫠.

Still, I am again sitting with her after 10 FUCKING YEARSSS *celebratory dance*

— Really exited for History... But also I hate the art integration project they are basically throwing at us 🥲 Now I'd need to work lol

— PAINTING THE SUBJECT YOU ARE AHHHH I love it so muchhhh... That teacher is one of my favourites 🥹

They said this year's main mediums would be pencil sketching and water colour – I SUCK at water colour lol, pencil sketching is yeahh.. pretty easy for me.

Let's see maybe this is the universe's sign I would get a chance to improve on my water colour skills....

— Bruhhh why was the principal so aggressive while giving her speech 😭 what did we do wrong on the first day only???

— Met my bestie and other friends after Four. Whole. Months. Felt soooo much better...

— Sad my soul sister (another one of my great friends) was absent today 😔 (she spend the whole night before watching Ind vs Pak match and couldn't wake up in the morning lmaooo)

— DID I SAY MY CRUSH IS IN THE SAME CLASS AS ME??? *-* He too was absent today lol...

— Felt sooo sleepy in class (because I had went to sleep at 3 and woke up at 5, and had to survive school on 2 hours of sleep T_T... My fault Ik, but my bhaat ghum doesn't let me sleep at night lol) because my school literally starts at 6:50 am bruuhh the torture!!

— Overall this school sucks. (Been here for more than 12 years, lovw it like my own life, but also cannot not complain about this place every chance I get)

Edit: ALSO ALSO, when I was buying poster colours while returning from school, the sweet sweet dukan wali aunty gave me a ₹20 wala Thumbs up free :3 she's my fav aunty for a reason... (I love ₹20 wala thumbs up so much lol that I literally have like a mini collection of those bottles at my home)

But now I am drained and tired and have literally zero energy for tomorrow lol

@foreignink lol I keep tagging you in everything... You're gonna get flooded with mentions when you return- hehe sorry... T_T But hey! I survived today at school!

[sereneswrld]

Hey Everyone,

Back again with a mini report of my overall thoughts on my first true attempt at ‘Reality Shifting’. The more I’ve sat back and thought about what happened; I’ve noticed I missed a few details that may be important to others. During the transition between my OR and what I assume to be my DWR. I noticed there were flashes of images in sort of like a paint splatter. Wasn’t really defined, not really blown up more so at a distance but noticeable distance.

I want to also point out the reason I say this is my first true attempt, is because I never allow my body to sit in sleep paralysis that long to truly try and shift. In sleep paralysis it’s not the void state and I believe (may not be factual) you cannot expect instant results. You have to sit in that for 5-10 maybe even up to 15 minutes. It’s uncomfortable but an experience I think is worth it now.

In my DWR it’s a chandelier at the entrance area of the home, it’s very distinct nothing I’ve truly seen outside of pictures in my CR. In the paint splatter like image I saw that exact chandelier. It was in flashes but I do remember seeing it, especially because I’ve only seen that chandelier in pictures. I’d say a couple times not many to truly remember. I realized I seen it when I was scrolling through my feed and the Insta influencer house that I want to use as a waiting room popped up.

I also wanted to point out during the vortex experience, it did feel like flying with wind. I know my fan was on, but the way I sleep to do this which is possibly important too. I cover my ENTIRE BODY and ONLY leave out room for me to breath peacefully. I do this because it feels like I’m in a capsule of some sort, and that my body is protected (not sure if it really does lol). I practice the tuning that Robert Monroe advises to do in the ‘Getaway Tapes’ also. I believe the ‘Gateway Tapes’ we’re extremely useful for me and I’ve only gone up to FOCUS 12.

I practiced the first few tapes up until the FOCUS 12 for about two-three times. I believe less for the tapes in between. Looking forward to another adventure!

Always,

𝒮𝐸𝑅𝐸𝒩𝐸

[mine-fujiko]

About Lupin III, I grew up watching part 1 and still to this day it remains my favourite installation of the franchise, with only Lupin Zero as a very close second if not even on the same level. I just adore Yasuo Otsuka’s style for the characters design and to me that’s the way they look best (redhead Fujiko, cute tall and lanky Lupin and Jigen and Zenigata, first time we see Goemon he looks like an Utamaro’s painting!) and the animation is pretty good for a 1971 tv series. I love the “more violent” episodes by Osumi but also the more comedic later ones by Miyazaki/Takahata.

The series as a whole is incredibly original, it doesn’t follow the usual tropes but instead it gives us a terrific interaction between the main characters. It also doesn’t claim to do any big explanations but just presents the viewers with characters and situations that are just there to be interpreted as the viewers wish. Very interesting to see as both characters and situations develop in the course of the 23 episodes. I’m going to focus only on Lupin, Jigen and Fujiko because there are some episodes that are just “Lupin and Jigen vs Fujiko” that are absolute comedy jewels 😁

On to the characters.

Lupin: is an arrogant, egocentric, over confident arse. He’s convinced that Fujiko is his girlfriend but he is the only one who thinks that! He is very attached to Jigen. He also kills cops. In later eps he starts to see Fujiko as a rival, stops molesting her(!) and by the end of the series they’re more like friends/colleagues.

Jigen: is very loyal and very reliable, off the scale cool guy who saves Lupin’s life like every 5 minutes, he’s sarcastic, cynical but also fun loving and a bit mischievous too. Doesn’t trust Fujiko and he is right because (see below). In later eps he too starts to see Fujiko as a friend/colleague. Still doesn’t trust her, though!

Fujiko: is a wild psychopath. Literally trumps on everyone’s dead body to get what she wants. Nobody’s girlfriend but totally Lupin’s antagonist. Doesn’t give AF and does whatever is best for her. Backstabbing made perfect. In later eps she loses a lot of her sexy man-eater traits but that’s the Miyazaki effect.

I also want to add what really makes the series and thanks god the whole franchise for me, which is the great amount of humour (all characters can turn from extremely cool to goofballs in a sec) and the ability to mix drama, comedy, mystery, mad gags, etc.

As someone who loves the original manga I maintain that the series that did the best job about basically *anything* was part 1.

For reference, the “Lupin and Jigen vs Fujiko” episodes are:

… basically all of them? LOL! No, for real episode 6, 10, 12, 16, 17, 21 because Rie is mini-Fujiko!

To quote one resume it usually goes like this:

“Fujiko goads Lupin into stealing a large shipment of diamonds. Lupin takes the task despite Jigen's protest that Fujiko is playing them for fools. Of course, Jigen is right.”

[fr-wiwiw]

15 questions, 15 people

I was tagged by @lienwyn! it's been ages but i have time to do this one now! Thank you for the tag dear ✨

1. Are you named after anyone?

I'm not. My mom's eldest brother gave me my name collaboratively with my parents. It was supposed to be something different like great figure from my country but it felt like a huge responsibility, so they changed it thank God for that lol

2. When was the last time you cried?

Just today. I wouldn't say full on crying, just a minute or less type of crying when you feel overwhelmed by something or when your brain decides to rewind a certain event in your head.

3. Do you have kids?

No but I have a baby turtle that I love <3

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Sometimes yea when I'm having certain conversations with my group of friends or when we're playing online games and if there's a current event (ex: politic figure doing something foolish), it will jump out if i'm flabbergasted once or twice.

5. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Hmm.. depends. But my eyes would scan them up and down- and I realized that can come off as eyeing them like i'm some kind of arrogant person. I'm sorry to these people, I never meant to come off like that. But i like observing creatures and I draw too, so I tend to see them as a whole or if they behave and talk in certain ways and tone. I just notice things

6. What's your eye colour?

Dark brown almost black if there's no lighting. Typical asian eye color

7. Scary movie or happy ending?

Happy ending. I cannot watch scary movies bcs of my strong visualization and imagination. I can visualize almost anything from my memory and imagine them do anything next to me right here right now. It's... uncomfortable especially when my brain decides to scare me when I see dark places. it's the downside of being an artist

8. Any special talents?

So far.. I'm good at art related things. I want to try my hands on sculpting, painting in canvas, diorama, play more music instruments as a hobby and many more. But I don't have the time and money, hopefully in the future. I just love being involved in my curiosity and see what I can make out of it xD

I'm also good at reading people and situations. I'm a big empath too which comes in handy when I imagine or write. Or connect to people. I'm people's go to listener usually hahah but I create some more boundaries for this. It drains me because I feel deeply.

9. Where were you born?

Indonesia.

10. What are your hobbies?

Uh.. drawing, reading, playing video games, writing, listening to music, sing, eat out and take walks in mall or just strolling through shop marts.

11. Do you have pets?

Yes. I once had 2 red eared slider turtles for 11 years. Then 2 mini pomeranian, and another baby read eared slider turtle which sadly didn't make it for only a month. But my friend gave me another baby turtle, she's always ravenous and lively ^^ so cute.

12. What sports do you/have you played?

Oh man.. I played a lotta sports I even got a tan back then lol. Futsal (indoor soccer), soccer, kasti (kinda like softball / baseball), swimming, running, basketball, badminton. Would love to try snowboarding tho ngl it looks fun but I heard it's damn expensive. And horse riding. The only sport I play now is playing console games😂 would love to be active at sports again in the future

13. How tall are you?

156cm (5'11)

14. Favourite subject in high school?

English and art (but depends on the teacher)

15. Dream job?

Right now? A freelance or full time artist with stable income or good amount of followers to pay off my day to day living without a worry. I am a freelance artist, just not financially stable yet. Hope I can get there

I'm so late to this particular tag game so I apologize if any of you have been tagged before. @gaylilsherlock @uhhhhmanda @gayautisticraccoon @briwates @technitango @kdramastrix

[honeymochibubbletea]

Hellooooo my darlings! Everything is going well? I hope so! :3

Just two mini fics i wanted to write about how Charlie and Phantasmo had Olivia, their fan child that i created! You can find my post on here: https://www.tumblr.com/honeymochibubbletea/740783758018576384/ladies-gentlemen-and-every-single-beautiful

1° version:

“It was a peaceful morning like any other on Telltown… until Charlie and Phantasmo were jumping at each other’s throats in the middle of a bakery: Phantasmo was pulling Charlie’s hair and she was punching hard his face… just your everyday typical day….

After hours of fighting Phantasmo, Charlie finally defeated him (again) and passed out due to tiredness. When she woke up in her bed (thanks to Carter carrying her home), she heard a baby crying, but, strangely, it was very loud and it even looked like it was at her front door of her house…

So, she got up and went to the front door of her house: and there it was, a baby in a basket. With a letter attached to it. She widened her eyes in surprise and looked around to see if this wasn’t a prank (or even another plan of Phantasmo…) but by the looks of it, it looked unlikely…

She awkwardly looked at the baby and the baby continued to keep on crying, louder and louder. She then called Carter to help her:

Charlie: Carter! C’mere! There’s a baby at our front door and i don’t know what to do!!

Carter: What?! Really? Let me see!

Carter then went where Charlie was and picked up the baby carefully and lifted up in the air playfully but also safely:

Carter: Daaaww, isn’t this the cutest little baby you’ve ever seen Charlie?

Charlie: Well, it is a lot cuter now that it’s quiet, that’s for sure…

Carter gives Charlie a “are you serious?” Look and kept on goofing around with the baby, who was now giggling adorably. Charlie then decided to read the letter to see who in their right mind would abandon a little life like that? At a stranger’s door like that? This isn’t those old movies where a mother abandoned a child in a church or something! This is real life!

When Charlie opened the letter, it said:

“Dear Charlie or Phantasmo, to whoever i place the baby at the front door’s first, i very douchey placed your FUTURE child (not another timeline, but in the future) at your front door because ☆~Y E S~☆. So now it’s your responsibility and problem, lol, good luck!”

Charlie was… very confused, to say the least… Who was this “Timekeeper”? Were they being actually serious? And… Wait… what did they meant by “our future child”?!? Did they…? Kidnapped a newborn!? From the future!?! And did Charlie had a CHILD with HIM?! PHANTASMO?! No, that can’t possibly be: there was NO WAY the two could… Well, obviously this “Timekeeper” was up to no good, hell, maybe they are working with Phantasmo to incriminate her? Yeah, that seems a much more plausible explanation… until a paper flew from her hands and she noticed there was more than just the letter… she picked it up and…!

It was a DNA test: showing that, in fact, that baby was her’s and Phantasmo’s! And even more shockingly, it was from 10 years ahead!”

Aaaand that’s part one of this mini fic! If you all want a part two, i want you to give me 10 likes >:3 muhehehehe!

2° Version (the crack fic version):

“It was a very peaceful day: the birds were chirping, Barron was painting alongside with his niece, the people were buying and selling things… everything was very peaceful indeed in Telltown… except inside Dr. Phantasmo’s mansion… where things were… escalating chaotically:

Charlie has bursted into his lair effortlessly to “discuss” (translating to: beat the shit out of him) something:

Charlie: PHANTASMO YOU MOTHER FUCKER!

Phantasmo: What did i even do this time?!

Charlie: DON’T YOU PLAY DUMB WITH ME YOU SON OF A BITCH! LOOK AT THIS!

Charlie shows Phantasmo a positive pregnancy test, his jaw drops and he’s speechless for a solid 25 minutes… until he speaks again:

Phantasmo: but how do you even have conviction that the baby is mine?

Charlie: i was puking a lot and feeling really unwell. So, my brother said i should take a pregnancy test, at first i laughed it off, thinking that there was NO WAY i could be pregnant… but then i immediately took the test and here we are: I’m FUCKING pregnant of YOU!

Phantasmo: yeah, yeah, i got that you are pregnant. But how do YOU know for sure that the baby is mine? Also, stop shouting at me! Your voice annoys me…

Charlie: because, OBVIOUSLY, i then went to the hospital and took another test to see who was the father and it was saying it was you!

Phantasmo trying to remember how the fuck did he “impregnated” Charlie: Aahhh… remember when i tied you up and injected you with my DNA? Perhaps it could’ve been that-! AAAHHHH T-oby! Help me! This crazy woman is attacking me!

Then, both of them woke up in their respective homes:

Charlie: What fuck was that…? Thank god it was just a nightmare…

Phantasmo: God… what a fucking nightmare…”

[starryyy-eyed]

1. changes almost every day lol, right now its you dont love me by dawn penn and juna by clairo

2. all of them, love those guys <3

3. 18

4. aquarius

5. entp i think

6. almost famous

7. no, but i run a lot

8. ofc!! id love to, i think of like everyone i meet as my friends

9. matcha lattes and miso soup!

10. take a bite by beabadoobee

11. swans by hilma af klint, ive also been liking that seiries of paintings about a bartender guy shaking up a drink, any series paintings are fun to me

12. ive been watching so many hotd edits lately idk if i can even choose

13. autumn 🍂

14. i like doing yoga/pilates but ive also been journaling and drawing more lately

15. i dont really follow celebs much

16. low rise loose jeans, cotton tanks, mini skirts/ dresses, and my adidas gazelles

17. tom ford cherry smoke

18. mazzy star and mojave 3 right now

19. yes!! i want some more up my ears, a navel piercing, and some small tats

20. never let me go by kazuo ishiguro

21. is it wrong and brite lights

22. i only yse tiktok and insta for chatting w friends and fashion inspo so i wanted a more private account

23. none but the numbers 6,3,and 2 having been showing up a lot for me

24. lauren louise and girl on film

25. i dont watch many, but i just started gossip girl while doing my class notes and its good!

26.

persian rugs my one true love 🙏

27. sofia_2639

28. the 90s and 60s

29. architecture (specifically working on restoration of gothic era buildings but that may be a bittt too niche)

30. cherry red, white and light blue (the cuntiest gal at the july 4th parties)