#it was going to have More Details but like. it was getting TOO long yknow

[possibilistfanfiction]

arcane prompt "hospital"?

[jinx deserves the world, also it's nice to let cait use her girlboss disposition for good sometimes, yknow. ao3 here.]

///

you hand caitlyn a cup of black tea she probably thinks is beyond shitty; it's all they had at the cart in the courtyard, and you still have no idea how to make proper tea anyway. still, she smiles — small, and residually scared, but genuine — in thanks. she's been crying, you can tell: her eyes are red-rimmed and the sweater of vi's she'd thrown on in the middle of the night is rumpled around the sleeves, like she'd used them to wipe her tears.

'she's going to be okay, right?' you look at vi's still, bruised form in the bed. 'they didn't, like, tell you really bad news while i was gone or something.'

caitlyn steadies herself. 'no,' she assures you. 'she's going to be just fine.'

'okay,' you say, and you trust her because she loves vi and because she's a doctor, and mostly because at this point caitlyn wouldn't lie to you. you scoot your chair forward and lace your fingers together with vi's hand, the one without an iv taped into it, and squeeze gently, just a hello. the doctors had explained that she's on a lot of medicine to keep her comfortable, plus the anesthesia from her surgery, so she's not going to wake up until midday at the earliest. but just in case she can feel you, you want her to know that you're there. you remember coming out of the worst sedations, medication that was wrong for you or just way too high a dose, to vi slumped next to your bedside, her big, strong hand steadfast around yours. 'did you see her x-rays or medical history or something?'

'i didn't intend to,' she says in way of an answer.

'ah.' you fiddle with vi's fingers. 'gnarly, huh?'

she puts her tea down on the small table near the bed and runs a hand through her hair before she scrapes it up into a messy ponytail. 'i knew, in theory,' she says. 'we've talked about things, of course. i'm able to help take care of when her chronic back pain flares, and how she really should have a surgical repair on her bad shoulder. but, i just, well. i suppose i comprehend the breadth of it now, more completely at least, the details in a way i can understand.'

you don't know; you don't ever want to know, not like that. vi still has nightmares about prison, still doesn't eat enough sometimes, still refuses heating pads and advil sometimes after a hard shift. 'yeah.'

'and i suppose, too, that it's hard to know how much she's hurt, even if it's so much less bad now.' she shrugs, helpless, and looks at you. 'i just love her.'

it had been terrifying, to get a call in the middle of the night from the fire department: vi had been in a building when it collapsed, and she was hurt and it was, potentially, very bad. you're not sure who they'd called first — you or caitlyn — but she'd texted you a minute after and offered to pick you up so you could both wait at the hospital while vi was in surgery. it had taken two hours before her dad came out and explained that vi had some internal injuries that still needed more fixing in surgery, as well as a few bruises and scrapes, but she would recover fully with time.

'you should move in with each other,' you say.

caitlyn pauses for a few moments, but then she lets out a quiet laugh. 'how long have you been holding that in?'

you shrug. 'you guys have been together for two years. i know vi wants to.' you don't mention that you hack into caitlyn's person email on occasion, just because you like to be nosey; you don't mention that you'd seen her and vi send property listings back and forth the last few months. 'i know she hasn't said anything to me because she doesn't want to upset me, or make me think like she's choosing you over me, or whatever.'

caitlyn considers it calmly. 'she would never do that, you know.'

'yeah.' you do; it's the thing you know most in the world. 'i also know that she's scared that if she doesn't help me at much, i'll have another episode.'

that, caitlyn has no response to.

'i've talked about this a lot in therapy.' you squeeze vi's hand, just in case she's listening too. 'at first i couldn't manage any of it without her, for sure.'

vi had spent her first month out of prison visiting you in your tent in the scariest part of town, not pushing, just bringing you food and warm clothes, comfortable blankets; she'd sit with you for hours if you'd let her, even if most of the time you talked to voices only you could hear and saw things she never would. finally, you agreed to go to the hospital with her, and from there it was more months of getting clean, and trying different medications, and really lame group therapy, and coming to terms with your diagnosis. vi was there as often as she could be, clean-cut for once while she went through the fire academy. you don't remember many details, but when you'd finally gotten released, she'd brought you to this small, rundown one bedroom apartment that she'd made as nice as she could. the first night you were home, she fell asleep in bed next to you in less than a minute, a few tears on her cheeks, seemingly of their own accord. it's always been a measure of love you'll always be a little in awe of.

'but, like, i remember my meds on my own now. i have a system.'

caitlyn's smile is honest-to-god proud. 'that's no small feat.'

you try to act nonchalant, but she's right: most of your medications have side effects that require other medications to off-set, and it's a nightmare if you don't coordinate them properly. 'and, like, my graduate program is going well, and i have friends, and i like climbing. i feel, not good, i guess. maybe i'll never feel good. but i feel real, and most of the time the world feels real too.'

caitlyn lays her hand on top of yours, and vi's.

'anyway,' you say, clearing your throat so you don't cry. you run your free hand through your hair, grown out some now after your "interesting decision," as vi had said, last year during a meltdown. 'vi can move out, and ekko can move in to our apartment. he's —' your boyfriend? your best friend? your favorite person, other than vi?

caitlyn smiles gently. 'he is.'

'he knows what to do, if i need help.'

'and i know you want to live with vi, and i know she wants to live with you.' even though you invade their privacy by checking emails, you'd never spill the beans that they've both individually been looking at rings. 'i can manage, without her there as much. i don't think either of us ever thought that would be our reality, which is why vi hasn't brought it up. i know she's still scared, probably forever. it was scary.' you take a big breath and then let it out; when you'd first gotten your diagnosis, it seemed like you would never get to be a full, independent person, and then it would be a death sentence. 'but i want to try. i can try.'

caitlyn squeezes your hand, and vi's too. 'i believe you will do wonderfully, in both my professional and personal opinion.'

'oh. really?'

she nods. 'you haven't had a full blown episode in over a year. i see you manage your days, and your impulses. clinically, you're actually a great patient. personally, you're a pain in the ass sometimes, but not because you're unwell.'

'just because of my stunning charm and incredible sense of humor? my flair for the dramatic?'

'something like that, sure.'

you laugh. 'thank you, so so much.'

she rolls her eyes but she's still fond of you, especially in the early morning light. vi's eyes are both bruised blue, but caitlyn had told you that surgeons had finally fixed her broken nose after it broke again this time: you're pretty sure vi hasn't been able to breathe properly since she was, like, twelve. at the very least she'll snore less, so a win for all of you. 'we found a house we want to put an offer in on,' she admits.

'yeah?'

she nods. 'it's not too far from your place, and it's right on the park.'

you scoff, just for posterity. 'fancy.'

she's unfazed by this point. 'we — well, vi was going to tell you, but i know it's fine if i do. we know you and ekko want to keep your current place, and i'd actually like to sit down with both of you and see if there's any way i can assist with your rent or other budgetary items.'

you're definitely, 100% about to cry, all of a sudden.

'she is so proud of you, for even being able to consider pursuing increased independence.'

you sniffle.

'but, the brownstone we're looking at also has a fully finished basement, with a bedroom and a small living area, its own bathroom. we've planned for it to be your space, whenever you want it, for any reason, for however long you'd like to stay. a night, a year. you will always have a home with violet, which means you will always have a home with me too.'

you have to do your deep breathing: sometimes kindness, especially given freely, is what makes the world slide most off-kilter. there are always voices telling you that you don't deserve good things, that caitlyn, and vi, and ekko, and vander, and even caitlyn's parents, when you go over to their giant ass mansion for celebratory dinners or parties, are lying to you. but you put your head down against your joined hands and count to ten, whisper it aloud, and then sit back up. caitlyn is waiting patiently.

'how big is the house?'

she laughs, heartily, and pulls out her phone to show you pictures and specifications. it's beautiful — not that you'd ever expect less of caitlyn kirammen — but she also tells you the plans she has to decorate, and your chest aches with a happiness so tinged with grief when she casually explains things vi wants in each room too. it's a life you never dreamed you'd get to have, and you know vi has probably been having total menty-b's about all of this, but she deserves a home more than anyone you've ever met.

'it's fine, i guess,' you say, after caitlyn finishes showing you their plans for the patio and yard.

caitlyn laughs. 'up to your standards?'

'could use more neon.'

'keep it confined to the basement, and you've got a deal.'

'ugh.'

'the only request i have is that you not blow it up.'

you pretend to contemplate. 'that's reasonable, i guess.' you look around at all the monitors proclaiming your big sister's strong heart and lungs and brain, despite it all. 'vi's gonna be so relieved that we don't have to have a heart to heart when she wakes up.'

caitlyn looks at the still planes of vi's face adoringly. disgusting, still. 'she'll be difficult enough as it stands, i'm sure.'

'total pain in the ass.'

////

you spend the first night after vi moves out in your apartment with ekko, and you fall asleep with your head tucked into his chest, safe still, even now. that weekend, you haul a duffle bag of your stuff — clothes, toiletries, a quarter of your lab, a few cans of spray paint — to vi and caitlyn's new house. neither of them are home yet, vi stuck grumpily on desk duty for the evening and caitlyn's meeting running over.

but your key turns in the lock, and your favorite snacks are stocked in the pantry. eventually, they both get home, and they're happy to see you, and caitlyn laughs at the improvements you've already done to the walls of the basement. vi ruffles your hair and you bully both of them into ordering tacos like you want, even though they have plenty of things you could cook at home. caitlyn is polite enough to let you curl up with vi on the couch, just for tonight, and you fall asleep, safe and warm, there too.

[aesethewitch]

Ghosts 101

Spirit work has always been the ultimate base of my spiritual and magical practices. Some of my earliest clear memories are of encounters with spirits, and I’ve always had a talent for sensing them. In a horror movie setting, I’d be that person who gets the weird feeling in the hallway right before all the doors slam shut at once, feeling the shift in the air before whatever ghoul’s around makes its mischief.

I mention this right out of the gate so that you, the reader, know that most of what I know about ghosts (and spirits in general) comes from personal experience. Not books, not videos, not other people’s work. There’s a lot of UPG in this little essay. Just keep that in mind as you read.

If there’s something you disagree with or have different experiences with, I’m not surprised! Everything in the realm of spirits, including ghosts, can really only be theorized about. Disagreeing opinions, experiences, and theories are very, very welcome. Drop ‘em in the replies, reblogs, or my inbox. Or, if you want, make a post of your own and tag me in it. I want to see them!

Anyways, with that lengthy UPG disclaimer out of the way, let’s get to the good stuff.

What is a Ghost?

I think it’s important to note, though kind of obvious, that ghosts are a sub-category of spirit. All ghosts are spirits, but not all spirits are ghosts. But what is a ghost, exactly?

As with most things, theories differ. In general, ghosts are thought to be… well, dead people. Some folks think that ghosts are the soul, essence, or spirit of a person who has died. Others believe that ghosts are just a fragment of a person’s spirit. But I’ve also seen theories stating that ghosts aren’t really ghosts, they’re echoes or imprints of human energy that once existed in a place.

Then, there are folks who think ghosts don’t exist at all. I can’t really blame them; empirical, repeatable proof of ghosts is tough to get in order to be satisfying in a scientific way. The only reason I personally believe in ghosts is because I’ve had several encounters that can’t otherwise be explained. Plus, for me, it goes hand-in-hand with other types of spirit work. Ghosts being real just makes sense with the framework I use to engage with the world.

So, obviously, there isn’t one single, concrete answer as to what a ghost is. We can only theorize.

My Theories

My personal theory aligns more or less with one of the more common theories. I think that ghosts are the lingering spirits of living beings who have died. Note I say living beings — some people think that only humans can become ghosts, but I think that any living thing can become one. In the case of plants and trees, ghosts behave somewhat differently than animals; but that’s a whole other conversation to be had. For the sake of this post, I plan on focusing mainly on human ghosts.

The way I understand it, ghosts are the whole, complete essence of a person that lingers in the physical realm for a time after their physical body no longer functions. I believe there are also energetic imprints — energy left over from the living, often (but not always) caused and fueled by strong emotions and lingering ties of memory in a place. These imprints can seem like a haunting, but the key difference is that they aren’t sentient. They may echo when you call, but they won’t give answers that are intelligent or timely according to questions asked or stimulus provided by the living. Sort of like recording a ringing bell; playing the bell’s chime back doesn’t ring the bell again. It just plays the sound it knows.

Now, death does funny things to the mind. Depending on the circumstances of the death, a ghost might have full awareness that they were alive, have died, and are now a ghost. I find this is most common for people who died of old age and long-term diseases: people who knew they were nearing the end, for one reason or another.

Ghosts formed from more sudden deaths, on the other hand, are likelier to not know what happened. They may figure it out given time, or they may never learn the truth. As with most other things dealing with individuals, the exact circumstances vary. No two ghosts are exactly the same. Some people don’t become ghosts at all, I’ve found! They simply move on.

Another important aspect of my theories on ghosts is that I think they fade. Unless they’re continually tied to a space, fed a steady supply of energy, and purposely kept in the physical realm, I believe that they can’t sustain a form here. Without a physical body to keep the spirit, soul, consciousness, or whatever we are, a ghost is gradually pulled into the more ethereal side of things. The astral plane, the other side, the afterlife, et cetera; I’m not sure, personally, where they end up. Maybe it depends on what they were attached to in life, maybe it doesn’t. Who knows!

I think this is where I draw the distinction between ghosts and ancestor spirits. “Ancestor spirits,” in my practice, aren’t individual people from my past. Rather, they’re a sort of collective consciousness made up of all the people who came before me who are connected to me through familial, cultural, and blood ties. I like to believe that ghosts become part of that collective when they fade out of the physical world. All this is to say, ghosts are just people who are dead. They won’t be around forever unless they’re bound and kept “fed.”

On Hauntings

The first half of the things everyone wants to know is: How do we know when a ghost is actually present? It’s a good question, one that’s hotly debated in ghost hunting circles. For the sake of argument, I think we need to define the word haunting first.

To be clear, a haunting isn’t just when a ghost is present. A ghost just passing through or lingering for a little while doesn’t necessarily make a haunting. That would be better described as a presence. A haunting, in my opinion, is a long-term, sustained presence of a ghost or imprint.

And the first step to dealing with a haunting is to determine whether the place you’re in is actually haunted. You don’t have to have super sensitive psychic powers to detect the presence of ghosts. Some folks might have an easier time of it than others, but anyone can learn how to discern when a ghost is hanging around.

It’s important to note that commonly-reported signs of ghost presences and hauntings are also symptoms of other issues like mold, electrical issues, pressure changes, carbon monoxide, stress and anxiety, noisy neighbors, animals outside or in the walls (including bugs), sleep apnea or insomnia, and more. It’s important to consider mundane reasons before leaping to magical, spiritual, or ghostly ones.

With that in mind, let’s say that you’ve ruled out all the mundane possibilities, and you’re still left wondering whether that place is capital-H Haunted. How can you tell?

In my experience, there are a few signs that will stick out:

Disembodied sounds, such as voices, knocking, and walking

A pervasive chill or prickling feeling, particularly on parts of the body that are covered

A feeling of being touched, poked, or prodded

Visual disturbances like mist or shadows

Sudden smells that can’t be explained, such as perfume, tobacco, or food

Batteries in things like phones and cameras draining very quickly

Now, note that even with these signs, a lot of these things can happen with spirits that aren’t ghosts. The only way to know for absolutely sure that you’re dealing with a ghost and not a mischievous, physical-realm-poking non-human spirit is to make contact and ask.

My fellow sensitive individuals may experience other signs during a haunting. Depending on where your abilities lie, you might experience stronger sensations or detect signs of a haunting earlier than others who haven’t trained these senses.

What Causes a Haunting?

It’s hard to say. Some people (particularly ghost hunters with big TV shows who need to make those viewer numbers go up) say that ghosts stick around because they’re pissed off or had some tragedy befall them in life. Trauma ties them to their surroundings, trapping them between life and death as a specter, or something like that.

Honestly, all that tells me is that these guys are trying to sell you something (their show). I’ve met maybe two ghosts that were like that, and they had extremely good reasons for it. That’s not to say there aren’t traumatized ghosts out there; just that they aren’t nearly as common or the only explanation for a haunting.

I’m personally not sure what causes some ghosts to linger over others. I think it does partly have to do with emotion, but it may also have to do with the amount of energy the person had left when they died. For example, the ghost of my great-aunt faded within a couple weeks after she died, because she was old, tired, and ready. On the other hand, the ghost of a guy I went to school with who died in an accident a few years ago is still lingering on the train tracks where it happened. It’s an extremely individual thing.

Another part of lingering ghosts and hauntings, I think, is interaction with the living. Without a physical body, the ghost has no native source of energy. Part of working with ghosts, for me, has been learning how to share energy (mine or from other sources) with ghosts to help them communicate, interact, and continue existing. When the energy runs out, they fade. With a steady supply of energy sources, a ghost could theoretically haunt a place indefinitely.

So, what causes a haunting? I don’t really know for sure! What causes a haunting to linger? A steady source of energy, I think.

Making Contact

So, you want to talk to a ghost. Cool! You’ve got a ton of options at your disposal.

There are the witch-typical methods of spirit communication, most of which would work fairly well for talking to ghosts. I’ve talked a little bit about spirit communication methods before in a more general sense, but I find that ghosts don’t always respond well to divination.

In my experience, simpler tools are better. Unless I knew for a fact that a person understood tarot in life, I would be unlikely to use it to talk to their ghost. Tools you can easily explain that provide clear answers would likely serve you best for most ghosts. My biggest suggestions are pendulums, which are easy for ghosts to understand and manipulate, and ouija boards. Yes, yes, I can hear the gasping and booing already.

Listen. Ouija boards are not evil. Ouija is a game. But talking boards really are good tools for talking to ghosts. Again, they’re easy to understand and manipulate. Plus, you can get really clear answers from a talking board if your ghost is chatty.

There are other tools that have been popularized by ghost hunters that may come in handy, too. Personally, I’ve had success with voice recorders catching EVP (electronic voice phenomena) and, on one notable occasion, a ghost box.

Honestly, I’ve had little use for tools like these outside of ghost hunting scenarios where we’re trying to prove ghosts’ existence in a scientific sense. Voice recorders catching wisps of voice in the background are super cool, and I definitely would suggest having one on hand when doing a ghost adventure. But they’re not great for in the moment communication, since you have to stop a recording to listen back to it and then react who knows how long later.

Where ghost boxes are concerned, I���ve only had the one opportunity to try it out. We were in a location I knew to be haunted thanks to previous visits, and it did seem to work okay. I’d like to try it again sometime to see if it was just a fluke or if it’s an actual, viable thing to use. With any tool commonly used in ghost hunting TV shows (or that’s otherwise Popular By Spectacle), I always approach with serious skepticism. Those shows are all about creating a reaction that can be captured; and when they don’t receive a response, they’re liable to make shit up for the cameras. It’s annoying, especially when a tool might really be useful but it’s shrouded in the very necessary skepticism around these shows.

Now, my personal go-to method to connect to ghosts is to just… talk to them. I don’t usually need to use any tools for it. But I’ve spent many, many, many years honing the skills needed to do this. It’s worth learning how to do if you plan on working with spirits, but it does take effort to get good at, even if you have an innate talent for it. If you can, take some time to develop a sense for spirits. Learn what spiritual presences feel like for you. You may not get immediate results at first, but the skill of sensing energy can apply across the board. And even if you get no “real” response, you can still talk to the ghosts.

When you go to communicate with a ghost, just remember that they’re still a person. They’re not a spectacle, though they are fascinating. Not all ghosts are going to want to talk to you. Not all ghosts are going to like you. Be respectful. Treat that ghost like you’d treat any stranger out in the wild. Don’t be an asshole.

On Mediumship

This is mostly just a brief note, since it’s an adjacent topic that I’ve gotten questions about before.

Not everyone who talks to or works with ghosts is a medium. A medium is a particular career or path that describes someone who acts as a connector between the living and the dead. I tend to think of mediums as the telephone in a conversation — relaying messages back and forth. I used to do medium work all the time. It’s an exhausting path that requires a lot of self-discipline and solid boundaries dealing with both the living and the dead. I don’t do it anymore, though I do still communicate and work with ghosts regularly.

Just keep in mind that you don’t have to take on the title or mantle of “medium” in order to talk to, work with, or research ghosts.

Ghostly Q&A

I received a handful of questions about ghosts in the run up to posting this; thank you everyone who sent in a question! If you’ve got a question and want my perspective on it, feel free to drop it in my inbox or in the replies/reblogs of this post.

From @moonmargaritas: “How do you tell the difference between nervousness at discerning the presence of a ghost (new practitioner who still gets jitters 🤙) and sensing actual hostile intent?”

This is a really great question! This is something I had to work through myself when I got started. And honestly, I still get jitters sometimes many years later! It can be scary, even when you’re used to it.

The biggest piece of advice I have is to learn how your body experiences nervousness or anxiety. Where does that sit in your body? What kind of feelings to you experience?

For me, nervousness is a sort of itchy tingling around my shoulders and tightness around my ribs. It also manifests as the feeling of being watched or observed too closely. It’s easy to misattribute those feelings to a ghost’s presence — tingling and feeling like something’s watching? Those are classic ghost interactions! But I know that’s what anxiety feels like. That’s how I feel when the lights go out too fast or I hear a branch snap in the distance.

Once you know, you can work past those feelings and focus on what’s actually happening with the ghost (or spirit). I think of it like knowing when someone’s mad at me. Are they mad, or am I just anxious? It’s the same idea.

And, as a note, ghosts with hostile intent are few and far between. I personally don’t think that most ghosts, even the nastiest ghosts, can actually hurt you; they don’t have the energy resources for it. The ones that do are obvious, and you won't really have to question their intentions. However, you can always work with the communication methods mentioned above to determine the ghost’s feelings and intents. If you’re worried about negative interactions, a bit of salt and rosemary in a little pouch placed in your pocket goes a long way for protection.

From anonymous: “What’s an unusual way people could use to communicate with spirits? Like an expected divination tool or something we should pay more attention to.”

Hmmmm! Honestly, I think that classic, actual call and response is underrated specifically when it comes to ghosts. Yeah, we’ve all seen the Ghost TV Guys call out for a knock or a word or whatever, but when they get a response, they wig out and don’t do anything with it. It’s annoying!! Because genuinely, saying “tap once for yes, twice for no” and asking questions is a really, really solid way to communicate with a ghost when you have no other tools that will work on hand. I’ve had ghosts lead me to important places and objects within houses doing this. I think more people should give it a try without falling prey to the over-the-top reaction of “DID YOU HEAR THAT?!”

From anonymous: What advice would you give someone dealing with a haunting?

For a run-of-the-mill, regular old haunting? Let it run its course. Most hauntings, when left alone, will fade. However, if you’re inclined to talk to the ghost(s), get them to leave quicker, or get them to be less intrusive in your life, there are a few things you could do.

To talk to them, choose a method of communication and try to reach out like I described above. Get to know them if you can, and set some ground rules. If they won’t (or can’t) communicate with you, and you really want them gone, I would probably recommend a gentle banishing ritual. Something that doesn’t scream “get out” so much as kindly say, “It’s time to move on.”

Or, if you don’t want the ghost gone, just a little quieter at night or out of your bedroom, you could set up wards or activity-dampeners around specific spaces. Choose ingredients and spells that protect against unwanted spirits or just unwanted activity. Keep it activated all day long or just at night while you’re trying to sleep.

Thanks for Reading!

Posts like this are usually put on my Ko-Fi as exclusives first, but since the questions in this one came from Tumblr, I decided to post it in both places at once! (:

With that said, if you did enjoy this post, consider throwing a couple dollars at my tip jar. Tips, commissions, and shop purchases get you 30 days of access to my entire backlog of exclusive posts and upcoming ones. Monthly members get continuous access plus extra benefits! All support helps me keep the lights on, so it's very much appreciated.

If you've got Ghost Questions, shoot 'em my way! My inbox is open.

[jazjelspen]

ex-girlfriend

jeff the killer x fem! reader

(you've dated Jeff the Killer since high school and have known him for longer. You stayed even after he became who he is now.. but what if you became stronger than him? what if you became a completely new person entirely? and left your heavy-hearted killer boyfriend to rot?)

(notes: took inspo from fanon Jeff but also tried to write him into his own person of course :) will try to be realistic when it calls for it + took some creative liberties in certain aspects too. I also apologize if the characterization of Jeff and others isn't super fitting.. I'm still getting used to how I want to express them and construct them as characters and the world around them.)

(CAUTION!!!: includes dark/serious themes, mention of murder/death, use of cannab1s, slight implications of s3x, toxic relationships, physical abu$3, possible ooc(?) )

(NOT PROOFREAD)

[part 1/2]

you and jeff are a killer duo.

seriously and figuratively.

you two have always been attracted to each other, a connection you two couldn't see but you both knew it was there.

the older and closer you two got, the more you two realized you had more in common than you two initially assumed..

way, wayyy more in common.

but to skip a long origin story short, let me give you some details on how you and Jeff suddenly got separated in the way that you did.

you see, you and Jeff resided at the Slender Mansion.. mostly just to get Slender off your backs due to you guys finding solidarity and a sense of safety in the deep dark forests, far away from home. it kept you two safe from police, as well as anyone or anything else that could be a threat.

of course, the specific area you went into was territory of the thin and tall boss of the forests.. and you would've been dead meat if you two didn't create a sort of alliance with the deity, not exactly proxies yet you two still had to trade something in return for your lives.. the lives and bodies of others seemed to quell Slenderman's hunger quite well.

nonetheless, tonight was one of those nights in which you and Jeff had to find more lives to take, blood to shed.

this night was different though, as Jeff was currently stuck in your shared room after going through a minor operation at the hands of Eyeless Jack, another being that came and left as he pleased.

"You think he'll recover quick?" You perked up as you watched EJ sew in the last stitch in a cut that reopened earlier as he was helping Jeff into your room, cutting up the thread before standing back as you two stared at your injured boyfriend from beside the bed he laid on.

"Not as quick as you may think," spoke EJ, his calm, raspy, and slightly demonic voice sounding monotone as he isn't intending to comfort you in the slightest but just to inform you. "Slenderman's healing properties can only work so fast, the rest depends on his own body's will to repair itself."

"Makes sense, with how much the victim fought back and the cops almost got him by a hair.. " you let out a huff through your nose before crossing your arms over your chest and shook your head slightly. "It has never gotten this bad before..." You murmured before moving away to open the door for EJ to find his way out. "I know you don't usually accept 'thank you's but, thanks. I owe you one for saving his ass."

"Hm." hummed the blue masked being. He may have the form of a human, and sound like one to a certain extent.. but he doesn't have the feelings of one for all you knew. "I'm sure you know how to stitch him up again if another injury reopens, I won't be here the rest of the week as I'll be doing my own business elsewhere."

"Got it.." You opened the creaky wooden oak door to let him through, and he left just as fast as he came in.

Closing the door behind you and letting go of the rusty brass door knob, you sighed in exhaustion.

"Yknow, you've been awfully quiet--"

"Shut the fuck up or I'm going to slice your throat."

Your shoulders dropped as soon as you heard Jeff's empty threat escape his throat. You walked closer to him, your shoes making small thuds and the wooden floors creaking beneath your feet.

"There you are." you cooed, finally hearing him talk after being silent the entire time.. incredibly out of character for him yet you were sure the shame of getting as injured as he is now and having to be 'taken care of' definitely got to him. "I almost started missing you."

"Get my knife, get the rest of your shit, and let's move.. we have people to kill for fucks sake.." Jeff's hoarse voice cracked even further as he attempted to sit up yet the pain coming from his abdomen only caused his nerves his fire up, making him fall back onto the moldy mattress yelping in pain. "You're absolutely stupid for even thinking you're able to go out tonight Jeff." You proceeded to sit on the empty side of the bed beside him, your hand slowly reaching over to gently caress his brutally cut up cheek yet your lover only harshly smacked it away with the back of his own hand. "So.. you're telling me you're going to ignore what I fucking telling you to do?" Jeff groveled and huffed in irritation, if he wasn't so incapacitated he'd probably be pulling you by your arm or hair to get you to do what he told you. "Since when have you gotten so brave, doll?"

"Since I followed you and helped you kill your own family that night." You pulled your hand away, reminiscing the night when your Jeff turned into who he is now.

You remembered how much your heart swelled when you saw him covered in his family's blood, his fresh cut up smile and red inflamed burns across his body and face. You continued to love him just as much as you did before he became so disfigured.

He was your religion, and you followed him in devotion.

"Now, we still have to keep our deal with the big boss right? I'll do your kills for the night, then when your better tomorrow we'll finish up whatever else we have to do.. or hell we can just kill for fun to make it up to you, " you hopped off the bed as you spoke and walked over to a wooden rotting vanity in the corner of your room, with drawers that were unable to close and doors that were hanging by their hinges. Your hand reached over to get an empty crunched up ziplock bag and continued on to walk back to your boyfriend with the object in your hand. "What do you say? I'll even get you some of the good stuff to make you feel better." you spoke lovingly, your hand with the bag grazing over his misshapen nose as he inhaled it deeply with a faint sense of delight. It still lingered the smell of his favorite thing to smoke and get high off of.. aside from your kisses and affection of course.

"Fuck that smells good.." he mumbled before his beady black eyes then suddenly shot up at you with this look of angry hesitation. "This is the only damn time I'm ever letting you out of my sight, make it quick, come back, and if you take a fucking second too long I'll get up and drag you back by your hair myself, got it gorgeous?.."

"You won't even have to bother Jeff." you bent over slightly to give him a quick peck on the lips, but just as much as he was addicted to the green he was also addicted to your warmth, your lips, your presence and self.

You couldn't help but have to suddenly sustain your own body weight by resting an arm beside Jeff's head as his own uninjured arm went to grab you by the back of your head to pull you closer in a deeper, much more passionate kiss.

Hearts beating aggressively in a dark passion that was just as fiery and scarlet as the blood you two would spill on the daily, the faint smell of dried blood, mud, and rubbing alcohol reeked as you two struggled to inhale air with your noises clashing against each other, his aggressive and hungry kisses tasting of iron but also of old cigarettes and booze.

Normally this would disgust any one else that wasn't you, but you liked the way he smelled, how he tasted.. it reassured you that this was in fact Jeff, your Jeff.

Eventually, he would finally let you go by harshly pushing you away in order to break the kiss. He knew that if you stayed any longer he was gonna want you all to himself for the rest of the night, as close to him as you physically could.

"Get out of here and get back, ______. Don't make me wait longer than I have to."

You smiled at him, a sweet and sinister little smile that would somehow always get him hard every time you did it.

"You've got nothing to worry about."

two weeks.

two weeks passed since you disappeared that night.

Jeff recovered the night after you left, but you could imagine the absolute horror and rage he felt when he realized you never came back later that night.

With other residents also living in the mansion, residents with personalities and have bits of humanity left similar to Jeff, you can also imagine the slight wave of rumors to those that knew or noticed the two of you in your years in the mansion. Some say you made a deal with Slender and got to leave, others say that you got kidnapped, that you got brainwashed, caught by police, sacrificed to another higher being, stuck in an asylum or- simply that you died. There were endless possibilities but they all ended the same:

you hung Jeff dry, left his grasp and simply didn't come back.

Jeff would obviously try to get in contact with Slenderman as to know your condition, since he knew that the deity had the consciousness and psyches of every being or person he's made some kind of contact with in his hands.

Although he had to go through one, two, three of Slender's proxies, just to have a word with him somehow.. He would eventually get a word from the big boss through one of his more well known lackeys.

"She's fine, Jeffery. She isn't dead, she hasn't made any deals with him, and she isn't injured to death or whatever." the annoyed and exasperated voice of Masky would echo in the empty halls that the pair stood in, the arms of the mustard-yellow colored jacket would fold over his chest while also being in a sort of stance that expressed the fact that he simply just didn't want to be there.

"Then why the hell is she not back?? Does he know where she could be? If she was kidnapped? If she got arrested or put in a fucking ward?" Jeff yelled in an almost desperate sort of tone yet he would never admit it openly.

"Look, I don't fucking care whether she's alive, dead, stuck in a fucking hole or hell! if she's sucking some other guy's dick that isn't yours! But all I know that is that if she left on purpose he would've already had me or one of the others to get her back, but he hasn't so maybe she's nearby or some shit like that."

Anyone around could see that Jeff was on the verge of reaching over for his knife and cut Masky in half, yet he knew better than to do that to him of all people. "Does he at least know where she is?? I'll get her myself if I have to just give me a fucking address, some place to know where she could be!.."

If Masky wasn't wearing a mask, he'd probably be rolling his eyes to oblivion, irritated beyond belief at something like this even being a problem. "No. But as I already fucking said, if he isn't asking one of us to chase her down and get her back then you shouldn't have to overreact the way you are right now." the proxy proceeded to brush past him without a care, but said one last small thing before he left Jeff's vicinity completely.

"By the way, stop bothering the other proxies about this as we could care less about your girlfriend, just get a new one and fuck off!"

Jeff stood there, trembling in an anger he hasn't felt since the day he attacked his bullies and his brother took the blame for it.

He wasn't exactly reassured, but he also knew that he was very limited and there wasn't much he could do.

But he was restless, so you bet your ass he was going to go look for you even if it was just stalking the streets and killing anyone in his wake.

luckily for him, his waiting would end soon enough.

the week after that, he'd get the news of his life.

he'd been killing all week, killing innocents as he usually did but at a quicker and animalistic pace, he would almost get caught this time by the cops yet again but before his spree could continue he received some news thanks to that cheeky voice that would speak to him through the screens.

he would come back to the mansion, battered and bruised beyond belief. the calluses on his hands split and bled, cuts everywhere all old and fresh, he was ruthless in his murders as well as he was careless.

he needed you to ground him, you were the reason as to why he has even been alive for as long as he has.

his hand seemed to be superglued to the handle of his sharpened knife even as he was dragging his legs towards EJ's basement, where he was led to believe he would find what he was looking for.

He aggressively banged on the metal door with his fist in anticipation, not being able to wait any longer than how much he's already had to. The one to answer the door would be Eyeless Jack as it is his "resting" place in the mansion so to speak.

Once the door opened Jeff would quickly push past EJ not needing to be accepted in the space for him to go in.

"Where is she??" he shouted, his voice boasting in the cold concrete room. "I was told you found her, where the fuck is she?"

EJ would calmly close the door before slowly leading Jeff towards a corner of the large space, where a long, clean-white room divider seemed to hide something.

well, more like someone.

That was when Jeff finally saw you, your limp body laying there and your face had this gentle expression you'd usually make when you were sleeping. Beside you stood Nurse Ann, who was gently cleaning the countless cuts and lacerations you had around your body with several cotton pads and changing gauzes as well.

Jeff's heart fell down to his stomach, he would've started reeling and throwing up if he didn't rush to take a closer look at you only to see that your chest was still rising and falling.

He sighed in relief.

"As you can see, she's alive." spoke EJ as he took a few steps closer, "Nurse Ann found her as she was coming back to the mansion, she found her body laying on the edge of where Slender's territory ends and the rest of forest. She also claims that ______ wasn't there when she left, so she probably appeared a little later that same day."

Jeff's hand trembled slightly as he reached out to touch your face with the back of his hand, yet hesitated slightly when his hand could almost feel the warmth of your skin.

But that's when he took a minute to really take in the rest of your appearance.

Your entire body even your face was dirtied in dried mud and soil, your fingernails were dirty and chipped, your arms and cheeks were decorated in scratches and cuts of various sizes, and your clothes.. seemed to have been replaced with a clean hospital gown and your missing shoes were replaced by socks.

EJ continued on, "And so you don't go attacking me, Nurse Ann changed her clothes. According to her they were tattered and beyond repair, and that they were completely soiled in blood."

"Blood?" Jeff spoke up in slight concern,

"The blood wasn't hers."

[minawritesfanfic]

You are who you eat

Dexter Morgan x Reader

Word count: 4.4k

Summary: After lots of games it is finally time for meet Dexter in person

Part 4

Previous | Next

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

The last few days were hectic, to say the least, with Dexter’s constant crew of agents surrounding him it was hard to send him any more goodies without risking exposing my identity earlier than I intended. I wasn’t sure if they’d allow me to send him treats without thoroughly expecting anything I send so I held back. Things were also hectic due to the new developments in the Bay Harbor Butcher case but also a big lead on someone the fraud department had been trying to catch for months, meaning my team was split pretty thin throughout the building trying to help with major and minor technology errors. It was absolutely insane how many calls we got where it was usually a simple fix, I love my job but god some of my coworkers are idiots. I crossed my arms over my chest with a sigh as I walked down the hallway past the homicide department towards the elevator, I couldn’t help but peek through the glad walls, I was surprised to see that Dexter and his entourage were nowhere to be seen. Though I could see him and another guy hiding away in the back, my attention was drawn away as I heard a voice call out my name. To my surprise it was Debra, Dexter’s sister, I didn’t know her very well but we had started talking more frequently as she’s needed my help quite often as of late.

“Hey! I haven’t seen you up here in a while, how have you been?” She said with a smile tucking her hands into her pockets.

“I’ve been alright considering everything that’s going on, how are you? I heard you guys found the butcher.”

“I’m alright as well, I’m just glad we’re close to putting this guy behind bars. It fucking sucks he was one of us though, you just never know what a person is like behind closed doors yknow?” I nodded stiffly trying not to laugh at the irony.

“Yeah, yeah it’s awful. The world’s a really scary place, but uh can I ask what was the deal was with all those FBI agents and your brother?”

“Ugh don’t even get me started on that, they were his protective detail just in case the butcher came after him but he fucking called them off. I was actually headed to go give him a piece of my mind about that when I saw you.”

“Well, they did seem kind of suffocating..” She gave me a look and I raised my hands defensively, “Sorry not my place, I’ll let you talk to him then.”

“Thanks, I will but uh I was wondering if you would maybe want to grab some drinks later?”

“Oh, I’m sorry not tonight, I probably won’t be done until very late. Maybe another time, first round on me?” She frowned but nodded, she patted my shoulder before storming off to see her brother.

It was great news to hear that Dexter’s constant security detail was gone but it also meant he was off to cause trouble tonight and I was going to figure out what. For now, since I have the chance I should probably send another note, I left the department and headed back to my office. I didn’t like the fact I was going to have to print it here but it would have to do for now, I didn’t want to wait too long and lose his interest and curiosity. Once I was back in my office I had to figure out what I was going to write, the other notes came easy but this one was harder to write. The big finale of our interaction was coming, the day we were set to meet in person, I was thankful I had scheduled it for a week or so after I sent the note as having him meet me with security detail would not have been fun. Now that I knew they were officially gone I could send another note confirming that I still wanted to meet him that Friday after not sending anything for nearly two weeks straight, I printed it out in my office and placed it in the bag with the double fudge brownies I had originally brought as a treat after lunch to instead give to Dexter. This time I would deliver it myself to spice things up. As I walked towards the elevator I wondered if he would try to kill me, that’s definitely something I had to consider. I know he kills murders but I don’t know the full extent of how he operates and if I’m safe from being tied down on one of his tables, but it was a risk I was willing to take. Of course that doesn’t mean I was going to meet him unarmed, I would take my own precautions. I stepped out of the elevator and glanced around making sure he was in his office and approached. I knocked on the door and held out the bag of brownies with the note as I smiled at him.

“Special delivery for Dexter Morgan.” I handed them to him and he offered them, I couldn’t help but notice the grin that briefly appeared on his face.

“Oh thank you, any chance you’re willing to tell me who this admirer is?” He asked as he set it down on his desk and looked away not expecting much.

“Sorry no can do, but I hear it won’t be long. Make sure to clear your calendar for Friday.”

I smirked and turned to make a quick exit when I saw the infamous Lila who Debra could not shut up about, she frowned and I knew she saw my interaction with Dexter and I could only imagine what she was thinking but it couldn’t be good. Before I could do anything she said goodbye to the detective she was talking to and hurried out the room towards the elevator. I sighed knowing that there was no way that this could end well, I left the department with a glance back at Dexter. It wasn’t a surprise that our eyes met again, I just smiled and disappeared out the door.

★ ✮ ★

Dexter read the note as he savored the brownie, it was delicious as always but his mind drifted to the brief conversation with a particular someone who he’d been seeing more frequently around the office. Most would say it was a coincidence but Dexter had stopped believing in those long ago with the job he had, they had to be the secret admirer or very closely involved with them. It didn’t make sense though, how could someone so normal and friendly be like him, he simply refused to believe it. From the most recent note it appears he’ll have an answer soon enough, they reiterated their intentions to meet at the beach beside Coral Cove Marina tomorrow afternoon. It was unsettling how much they knew about him and Dexter wondered if he would have to kill them, his number one rule was to not get caught and it’s not like they were innocent. But if he was interpreting the notes correctly they were likely about as innocent as he was, it was conflicting and killing them would make him the biggest hypocrite. Harry’s code has never prepared him for a situation like this. What right would he have to kill them if they worked under a similar code of conduct as he did? If what he did was just how could he persecute you for the exact thing he would be doing to you?

Rather than fretting over the ethical conundrum of his secret admirer, Dexter had other matters that needed his attention like whether or not he would have to kill this ‘Harlow’ person, after searching up his phone number it wasn’t hard to find his full name. Dexter put Christopher Harlow into the department's database, a known alias for one Jose Garza who had committed various crimes but none of which involved murder. Dexter didn’t need to kill him as long as he didn’t know where the cabin was, so he sent a quick text inviting him there to get his ‘snow’. Dexter didn’t wait long for a response and was relieved to hear that he had no clue, he tucked the phone back into his pocket and stood up. He needed to have a quick chat with Debra but more importantly, he needed more answers from Doakes. What he said had stuck with him, was Harry truly not who he said he was?

★ ✮ ★

Of course, I followed Dexter after he left work, I knew better than anyone he didn’t ditch his security detail just to lay around at home and watch tv porn. My suspicions were confirmed when he didn’t take the usual right at the light toward his apartment, I drove far behind keeping a safe distance between us to avoid being caught. Which grew harder to do as he ventured into the more rural part of Maimi, eventually he turned down a long dirt road. I watched as he took one more turn and eventually turned off his car, as I crept slowly towards the turn I could see up ahead was a very remote cabin. Now that I know where it was I could come back later to see what exactly he was doing here, for now, I had more important things to tend to like Franklin Graney.

The thirty-eight-year-old phone technician who not only kills people but violates them alive and dead, he’d just finished checking in after his last job for the day and was about to head home. He made his way to his truck but before he could even unlock it I came up behind him and used my wire garrote to strangle him, I forced him to kneel on the ground and pushed him away from me so he couldn’t reach back to scratch me. It only took a few minutes for him to pass out, I let his body haphazardly fall onto the concrete. I left him there and pulled my car up beside his, then I dragged him into my backseat. I got into the front and sighed, I peeked back at him through my rearview mirror with a frown but resolved myself to finish the job. I pulled out of the parking lot and headed to paradise.

Paradise was in the basement of an abandoned hospital, specifically an abandoned hospital with a morgue built into its basement which was equipped with everything I needed. Of course, I had to rig a few things to work the way I needed them to and clean things very deeply, it was awful in here when I first found it. Now it looked quite nice and I had even decorated it to my liking, and I had taken several measures so that any wanna-be urban explorers wouldn’t be able to get down here even if they tried. It was truly perfect. I turned on my music and got to work dismembering and draining the blood to save for later.

It was nearly midnight when I finished, cleanup was messier than usual today but I got what I needed. Unfortunately I couldn’t bring any of the meat or blood I harvested home because Debra was, unfortunately, spending the night, after we went drinking the last time she confided in me about her relationship with Lundy and apparently took that as us being friends now. I wasn’t a big fan of Debra but if I was going to pursue Dexter I figured it wouldn’t be a bad thing to befriend her, so even if it was unconventional to have her over I was prepared for this. It took a lot of reading, trial, and error but I had successfully managed to rig this floor to a generator which allowed me to use the mortuary fridge. I slid out one of the chambers originally used to store bodies and set the coolers containing the meat and blood onto it, then I slid it back in and shut the door. All I had to do now was take what was left of the body and incinerate it, I chose this hospital specifically because of its incinerator. I could start and finish my disposal of the corpse in one place and didn’t have to bother traveling around to complete the job it was wonderful, I placed the remnants on a cadaver stretcher and wheeled them into the other room. I opened the incinerator door and pulled out the long tray that slides inside, I transferred everything onto it and slid it back in. Then after pressing a button and pulling the lever, the incinerator roared to life, thankfully it was advanced enough to shut off on its own. I just had to come back for the bones another day, I walked back into the main room and grabbed my bag and keys before heading out. I needed to get as much sleep as I could considering what I had planned for tomorrow.

I quietly shut my front door behind me as I slipped off my shoes, of course, Deb had just tossed hers over here haphazardly. I bent over and neatly put them to the side like mine, as I stood back up I was surprised when a light turned on behind me. Debra was sitting up on the couch still awake, I completely forgot that she was still struggling to fall asleep when she was on her own. I smiled over at her and approached.

“You really were out super late.”

“Yeah, I really needed to blow off some steam then I ended up driving around not realizing how late it had gotten.” She nodded but still looked at me a bit odd.

“I see, well I’m glad you’re back safe. I was starting to think something bad happened to you.” I gave her a spin and smiled.

“Well as you can see I’m A-okay, but I desperately need a shower and to sleep for at least a decade.” I walked past her towards my bedroom, “ Good night Deb oh and I probably won’t be at work tomorrow by the way.” I said before shutting the door behind me, I desperately needed to sleep in and prepare for my meeting with Dexter tomorrow.

I tossed my bag off to the side of my bedroom and started to undress, I grabbed my towel and got into the shower. The water was warm and poured down my back it was like a really wet and warm hug. I reveled in it as I wrapped my arms around myself, killing people wasn’t something I had ever come around to enjoying and wasn’t what I wanted to be doing with my life. I had my life fucked from the beginning by people even more fucked up than I had become, so now I kill people so that I could cannibalize them. What a twisted life I was living, everyone I knew would be mortified to learn about what I do or the kinds of things I eat. Though if things continued the way they were nobody ever would, I finished showering and stepped out. The bathroom was warm and foggy from all the steam from my shower, I wrapped my towel around me before wiping away the steam on the mirror. I stared at my reflection briefly and a bloody monster stared back at me, I turned away and quickly left the bathroom. I just needed to go to bed rather than dwelling on things I couldn’t change as it wasn’t doing me any good.

Friday morning came faster than I anticipated but I made sure to call out yesterday so I slept in until ten, though it was hard to stay asleep when I had exciting plans for today. I got dressed and practically ran out the door, thankfully Deb had already left. I got into my car, I still had some time before it was noon so I decided to check out Dexter’s cabin in the woods before meeting him at the beach. I struggled a bit to remember where I was going but the closer I got the easier it was to remember, and eventually, I made it. Thankfully it seemed Dexter wasn’t here right now, I got out of the car and my clothes flowed slightly in the breeze. I nervously approached the cabin, it was old and looked damn near run down. I opened the door and was instantly met with a foul but familiar stench, I winced but stepped inside despite it and was surprised to see Sergeant Doakes locked behind a cage.

“Thank you, god, please you have to get me out of here.” He said with a relieved sigh as he stood up.

“What-what happened to you? Why are you locked up here?” I asked mostly to myself as I approached the cage resting my hand against the bars.

“It’s that freak, Dexter Morgan, he’s the Bay Harbor Butcher and he locked me in here. You have to get me out, the keys are over there.”

I frowned and I genuinely felt bad, to be honest, I liked Doakes and respected him as an officer but I couldn’t let him expose Dexter when I still had business with him. I thought for a moment debating what I should do, I didn’t want to leave him here as realistically Doakes hadn’t done anything wrong besides getting too close to the truth. Which was probably why Dexter hadn’t killed him already. It was his problem to deal with and I really shouldn’t get involved, I turned around and bolted out of the cabin despite his cries for help. I felt sick to my stomach, just leaving him there but what was I supposed to do? I had finally found someone somewhat like me, how could I throw away a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity like this? I quickly turned my car around and drove as fast as I could back to the main road, I decided to head to the beach even though there was still time before noon. I could hang out there and wait for Dexter to arrive but also spend some time clearing my head.

★ ✮ ★

After an enlightening but also earth-shattering conversation with Captain Matthew Dexter was lost, despite that he still arrived at the beach on time to finally find out who this secret admirer was. He stood far away from the shore in the shade with his hands in his pockets, he stared off into the distance where the ocean stretched out for miles farther than he could see but he also observed the various people littered across the beach. So when someone approached him from his left he turned to see who it was, and his suspicions were confirmed though it left him with far more questions than answers. She smiled at him but seemed apprehensive and kept a safe but reasonable distance.

“See we finally met huh? I’m sure you’re already working out how to get rid of me in your head which I wouldn’t recommend unless you want everyone at the office to know it was you. I’m just here to talk, now can we do that or are you going to take care of me like you did Roger?” Despite her body language showing how anxious from her eyes Dexter could see she wasn’t afraid.

“I have to admit I’m impressed by how bold you are, but you know me well. I won’t kill you for now just don’t give me a reason to.” He said narrowing his eyes slightly for a moment daring her to try something, “Why have you been sending me these gifts, what is it that you want from me?”

“That’s a great question, honestly at first I was just messing with you but then I grew curious once I found out you were the infamous Bay Harbor butcher. We operate in similar ways and I was a bit envious of how neatly you worked, at some point I started to look up to you and maybe even develop a crush.” She admitted turning away and walking further towards the beach, “It’s not every day you meet a serial killer especially one with morals. I figured we could be friends or something.” She said with a laugh as Dexter followed slowly behind her as they walked along the beach.

It was weird for Dexter to hear the words ‘serial killer’ fall so casually from her lips as she laughed like it was the most innocent thing in the world. Dexter’s mind was a whirlwind of emotions and complex thoughts, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting when they asked to meet him here. But he definitely wasn’t expecting a genuine love confession, sure they had been sending him notes under the guise of a secret admirer but he assumed it was just an excuse. Not to mention he was still conflicted as you did have morals on killing like he did so it’s not like he could justifiably kill you, this entire situation was baffling. Dexter couldn’t say he wasn’t attracted to her though, despite being weary she still carried herself with a confidence and aliveness that he didn’t have. He couldn’t wrap himself around how she could when they were the same, what did she have that he didn’t?

“That was a bit forward, wasn’t it? I’m sure this is kind of a lot.” She said with an awkward laugh, Dexter wondered if she could read his mind.

“I just never imagined I would find someone like-minded, but you want to be friends? How do I know you won’t just betray me?”

“Uhh I don’t know…” She paused thinking for a moment weighing her options in her head, “I could give you the location to my kill room? Then you could give me something more concrete about, uh let’s call it our hobby, then we’ll be even. Is that good enough for you?” Dexter thought for a moment, he hesitated but he’d be lying to himself if he wasn’t desperate for a connection much like this one.

“Sharing our vulnerabilities would be enough for me to consider this friendship, I keep my tools in a secret compartment in a chest in my apartment.” Dexter frowned as soon as the words came out his mouth, why did he tell her that, he could be risking his entire well-being just for some woman. But after everything going on with Rita and Lila, he needed someone more like-minded and rational.

“Oh so that’s what was in that trunk, I knew it was suspicious. Well, there’s this abandoned hospital on the outskirts of town that closed a little over a decade ago, in the basement is where I keep everything and do my work. There now we both have a safeguard in case of the other.”

“Yes, mutually assured destruction.”

“Exactly, but now for the other reason I invited you here. I do want to actually get to know you as a person Dexter, so how do you feel about treating this as an actual date?” She extended her hand out to him offering to hold hands.

Dexter mused for a moment with an unreadable expression as he stared down at her hand, “An actual date doesn’t sound bad. That’s fine with me.” He laced his fingers between her and she smiled.

“Perfect, I should probably start by introducing myself.” She told Dexter her name and he remembered Debra mentioning her once or twice, “Anyway do you know why I chose this beach?” She asked.

Dexter nodded and listened quietly as the woman went into a long speech about why she had chosen this beach besides its connections to Dexter. They walked along the shore as she did hand in hand with the sun shining down on them from high in the sky, from afar they appeared to be a normal-looking couple on a normal date. Dexter still wasn’t sure what to make of all of this, but he was at least enjoying the company as she made for a decent conversationalist. Not to mention he didn’t have to sugarcoat what he said because of a certain hobby of his because she understood, it was refreshing for him. Intoxicating even, his grip on her hand tightened slightly as he stared forward listening carefully to her words.

★ ✮ ★

We ended up walking along the shore talking for several long hours, well I did most of the talking as Dexter wasn’t exactly the chatty type which was fine. He still responded and was actively listening to what I said and occasionally when the topic broached something he was passionate about then he became chatty, but just as quickly he’d go quiet as if he was afraid to be passionate about anything. It was odd but I decided not to comment on it, as it was still the first date and I would have plenty of time to learn about him. Especially about the way he operated, and at some point our conversation drifted that way. I had seen his neatness in person, and I complimented him on how amazing it was that he never left a crime scene. He was very interested in how I disposed of my bodies though, I kept it vague and only talked about the incinerator. It was too early to talk about my cannibalism, I’m sure that’d scare him off faster than I could say, cannibal.

Eventually, the conversation strayed away from our extracurricular activities, we talked about our masks and he was curious how I hid who I really was so well, we talked about family, our normal pass times, and at some point the meaning of life. It was nice being able to let go like this, not having to hide what I do because someone wouldn’t understand. It was like I was breathing for the first time, and from the relaxed smile on Dexter’s face, I could tell he felt the same. I glanced past him and could see the sun setting over the horizon, it was a beautiful sight and the sun illuminated Dexter with a warm glow.

“This is so nice, I feel like I just let a huge weight off my chest. Not to mention the sunset is amazing, it’s so beautiful.” I said walking towards it as Dexter followed closely behind me as our hands were still linked.

“Yeah, admittedly this is kind of nice. I almost feel alive.” He said staring out at the sun with his hand on his heart.

“News flash buddy, you always were alive. You’ve been living every moment, I think you just can’t see it.” He glanced at me but didn’t respond so I changed the topic, “So does this mean I get a second date? I think this went too well to end with one.”

“Yeah, I think a second date would be quite nice.”

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

[sharkorok]

enha + reunions

summary: enhypen seeing their s/o after a long time!! :)

genre/tw: fluff, sappy fluff, crying, established relationship, idol!enhypen and reader doesn’t have a specified occupation, cursing, cute!!

a/n: mom made me pancakes guys everything is good

———

heeseung

-picks you up from the airport and does that thing where you run into his arms and he picks you up and spins you around GAWDDDD

-so happy to see you he’s peppering kisses all over your face but he’s still like “did you miss me? I bet you missed me hm?”

-has the prettiest smile on his face while you guys are on your way home, asks if you were alright during your trip and if everything went well, physically cannot bring himself to stop holding your hand or touching you somehow because he has you back and he won’t let you go!!

-I’m physically nauseous with how much he’s all over you like it’s almost overwhelming but he can’t help himself from being heads over heels for you

-“tell me you missed me as much as I missed you” mf you missed him more 😭😭

-if you’re the type to cry he’ll laugh while holding you, stroking your hair and promising you you guys are gonna be together again for a long long long time

other members below :)

jay

-honestly the only thing you were missing when he was gone was him physically, he literally would never miss a second to call or text you or send you money to go on “shopping” dates or FaceTime you before bed when he could-

-he got home super late and was so ready to crawl into bed and fall asleep, especially with YOUUU

-he saw you, and you lazily peeked up and smiled before outstretching your arms and gesturing for him to come and cuddle and he just melts. he hates being away from you but when he comes home to this it’s suddenly all so worth it

-buries his face in the crook of your neck and almost immediately falls asleep because he’s just so safe and comfy with you

-“I missed you so much, baby.” “I missed you too.”

-had the best sleep since he left you <3

-refuses to let you go or wake up in the morning so you better clear the next day when he gets home because u r stuck w that man!! (and ur not complaining)

jake

-“my baby’s home!!”

-all giggly and jumps to be all over you in a second, even if it’s in public he’s giving you such a phat kiss in an instant <3

-prompts you to tell him everything while he was gone, and in return he does the same, filling in with every detail and showing you all the photos he took of layla and him because he was so lonely without you :,)

-jay’s part made me lowkey sleepy but for you you’re gonna be staying up because Jake needs to talk to you and hold you and just be with you every second when you come back

-and yea he’ll wake you up unless you seriously need some sleep but you better stay up for him >:/

-I feel like he’s clingy but in the way he’s so reliant on you as a part of his daily routine and so he just feels like a part of him is missing when you’re gone, and now you’re back!!

sunghoon

-“wowww ok y/n so you didn’t get me the live band and sculpture of us kissing made from roses or even a six foot teddy bear covered in your perfume/cologne?? The bare minimum?”

-he’s mostly joking because he lowkey melts inside the second he sees you, showering you with souvenirs and gifts he picked up while he was away, telling you stories of everything he did and got to do

-“were you eating right? everything alright while I was gone?” acting like he didn’t text you good morning every. single. time. smh!!

-probably slows down and gets nervous that you think he didn’t actually miss you so he pulls you into his arms reaaaally tight out of nowhere and is like “I missed you yknow” but you better say it back or he’ll get sassy on you!!

-honestly takes a whole day off so he can catch up with you and just spend time with you since he was deprived of his y/n <3

sunoo

-gets so hype when he sees you again!! he’s so giddy and silly and I love him sm dude it’s not funny

-kisses your forehead/cheek when he sees you again, at home he’ll give you an actual kiss :>

-“pls don’t ever leave me again I couldn’t stand being w those buffoons for that long” “…?” “yknow my members?”

-makes you tell him everything and if you took photos he’ll be staring super duper intently at each and every one of them helping you dissect each one

-“no your hair looks better here post this”, he comments as he’s the small spoon and your head is rested on the top of his SOBS MY EYES OUT REALLY HARD 🤣🤣

-tells you every single story that happened when you were gone in excruciating detail and he’ll pretend to be offended once you fall asleep but he’ll tuck the two of you in, give you a kiss on your forehead and whisper, “I missed you so much”

jungwon

-I feel like he would cry in private especially if it was a really long trip

-apologizes for being emotional like STFU DONT CRY BBYYYY 😭😭😭, and he just wants to hold you and never let go so you guys aren’t apart ever again!!

-“were you good? you better have been!! tell me everything that happened while I was gone ok? :))” and he gladly listens and you two exchange stories but the entire time he’s looking at you so fondly you feel like you’re falling in love all over again

-“why are you looking at me like that won?” “I just missed you so much.”

-you bet ur ass he’s all over you for the next week, he feels so safe around you and not having you was like not having oxygen to breathe but in a healthy non toxic way

-gets all giggly and shy if you say how much you missed him too :,)

riki

-“almost died without you” -him the second he sees you again

-he’s not very loud about it because he can feel awkward expressing his emotions but holy fuck he never knew he could experience longing this bad

-the second he sees you again it feels like he got hit by a truck in the best sense of the phrase, he holds your hand so tightly you lose circulation you think

-“shh I know you missed me too” but that’s just because he feels embarrassed getting all sappy in public T-T, at home he’s letting himself get wrapped up in your arms and lazily talking about how lame it was to not have you around

-“I literally was not gonna make it another day let’s be fr here” “you’re so dramatic niki” “only for you y/n”

-melts when you press a little kiss to his forehead before bed the night you or him gets back, talking about how you two will be together for as long as possible <3333

-SOBS SO HARD U GUYS R SO CUTE *dies*

[elysia-nsimp]

Hello scary Danganronpa community I would like to leave my Korekiyo redesign here an an offering please do not hunt me for sport /hj

Details and stuff (giant bricks of autistic text) below cut

Okay so in canon, we know Kiyo’s sister made his uniform and (I THINK) (DONT QUOTE ME ON THIS) he canonically doesn’t like it very much but wears it because of the whole… sister thing.

This redesign is meant to NOT be just a replacement of the OG design, but takes place in a non-despair AU where Kiyo actually learns that the relationship he had with his sister was NOT a healthy one. He gets support from his classmates and possibly the therapy he DESPERATELY NEEDS, and after beginning to accept his situation, he makes his OWN uniform with help and input from his peers.

That being said, what all did I do and what was my thought process?

- his og outfit was highly inspired by military-style clothing, and. *The anti-semetic armband.* so all that went in the trash because I didn’t like it

- I put him in more comfy traveling clothes—a soft button-up, a cardigan, slightly baggy pants, high travel boots. He travels a lot so might as well be comfy for it! The boots have a fluffy lining for cold weather

- I changed the hat. He needed a hat still but I changed it from a military style hat to a sea man type hat. It just felt right.

- kept the mask, but he wears it more because of his travels—lots of diseases. + his sister died of illness so he’s cautious about that. (I did change some of his story too but I tried to keep the big plot points while not romanticizing it)

- kept the bandages too. He does a lot of field work so I imagine he gets scratches a lot. Just another precaution to protect himself when traveling.

- I wanted to use the rope and rose motifs in his official art. I was so disappointed there wasn’t more of that. So his cardigan and pants have matching vine patterns and he has a rope tied around his waist—it’s there because sometimes you need a rope yknow. It’s a tool but also stylish/hj

- it’s commented on in the game how he’s very feminine (QUEER) and how he “has the kind of beauty that puts female colleagues to shame” ??? which is a weird way of forshadowing BUT I decided he gets to have long eyelashes and longer nails.

- his locket has been moved from his breast pocket to a necklace.

- and lastly I kinda liked the weird stringy hair thing Danganronpa does sometimes?? I just gave it more volume because . Yeah.

So yeah those are my big notes. How about some more story-based explanations?

- Kiyo got used to the darker palette (plus it keeps the mysterious spooky vibe the creators were going for), so he just kept that.

- all the material is soft and breathable, which was his priority when looking for the base clothing pieces!

- Angie helped him with the rose and vines! They’re embroidered. All Kiyo said was that he felt it was all very green and wanted to bring back some red, something about roses, and that’s what Angie came up with for him. He really liked how it came out

So yeah :] I hope y’all enjoy, I like the final product. Definitely not intended to be canon in the event of the killing game universe but I’ve always preferred exploring non-despair AUs.

If anyone WANTS to hear about the story changes I made lmk but uhhh I’m not making that my first Danganronpa post ahahahahahahha (<- read this as frightened and shaking like a chihuahua)

Again please don’t shoot me point blank danganronpa community

[morgluvsconnie]

BOUND, c.springer

chap.7 | fighting, drinking, arguing, language | chap.6

"these was supposed to be yours yesterday but... you know how that went."

connie said, standing at your door with a bouquet of pink flowers and chocolates. you softly smiled and bit your lip, grabbing the big bouquet and chocolates from him. he then looked at your arm.

"these the same type of roses i tattooed on your arm that night."

you tilted your head. "thank you. really. this the second time you saw me lookin a mess though." you laughed a little.

referring to the bonnet you had on your head and the oversized t-shirt you had on. connie shook his head, "nah, you look good." he laughed. "them was for your birthday though... your third birthday present."

"you funny." you looked at the flowers before looking at him. "you heard from...?"

"he saw my message, he know wassup." connie waved the air before putting his hands back in his pockets. ever since he stayed at your house last night, he never got the feeling to stay away.

you had some kind of hold on him, and it was odd.

"but yeah..." he said after a small silence filled the space between the both of you. "if you feel good enough, eren havin a party at his house tonight. tryna see if you going." he looked at you.

you hummed. "ill let you know." you nodded.

"without my number?" connie frowned playfully. you rolled your eyes with a smile. "i guess you found a way." you mumbled, taking his phone and putting your number in it. "just text me and remind me about it tonight." you said, passing him his phone back.

"i gotchu." connie said, turning to leave. he paused in his steps and turned back around, looking at your lips.

you exhaled, walking closer to him and giving him a peck on the lips. "there." you said, softly pushing him out of your doorway and shutting it behind him.

you walked back towards your stairs and in your room, placing the flowers in an empty vase. "ill put water in you later." you mumbled, sitting on the end of your bed and checking your phone, which you hadn't checked all night.

you had calls and texts from sasha, her asking where you were and if you were getting "fucked."

"what?" you frowned.

"you got fucked last night, i already know. i told mikasa you were either at home slumped or getting fucked. and since you answered, i wanna know who it was, why, and how it was." she said on the other line, making you hum.

"i didnt get fucked by anybody last night." what a liar you are.

"yeah yeah, girl cut the bullshit. i wanna know every detail." she looked at the camera before looking back up and what seemed like her tv.

"okay ill tell you, but sasha dont make a big deal out of it 'cus it was literally nothing." liar.

"i literally wont, just tell me." sasha looked back at the camera.

"so i was with connie-"

"bingo! i just fucking knew it! yknow, i wondered why i couldn't find you and connie after i found ony and i suspected you two were somewhere, and he was beating them doonies down." sasha pointed at the camera, making you roll your eyes.

"alright, whatever. you goin to erens party tonight?" you rubbed your forehead and closed your eyes.

"yeah, and youre going too. you woke up so late, the parties already in three hours." sasha mumbled like it was nothing. "what?" you said in disbelief, looking at the time on your phone.

it was 5 oclock. you really did get put to sleep.

"okay sash, im finna take a shower, dont worry bout picking me up tonight, ill just drive myself. ion plan on gettin wasted no more." you explained, standing up and going towards your bathroom.

"okay girl, love you, bye." she said before quickly hanging up. you put your phone on the bathroom counter before turning your water on and taking a long, steamy, shower.

you really werent in the mood for another party, and you really didnt feel like going out tonight again.

your back was aching, your legs were on the verge of being sore, all because of connie. you didnt even stay out long enough last night to have sore legs from the club, so you knew he was the cause.

but parties were different from clubs. theres was more fighting, drinking, arguing, everything. especially drama.

as you redid your fresh face, applying light makeup, redoing your hair and curling it, and putting your outfit on, you checked the time once again. 7:43pm.

if anything you were gonna be late instead of early due to the sheer amount of people that would crowd the house, even minutes before the official party started.

you grabbed your things, heading out of your house. as you started your car, smacking your lips at the fact that it was cold outside, and you just mindlessly decided to wear a small skirt.

you pulled out of your driveway after starting your music, driving down your neighborhood, pulling your mirror down to make sure your hair looked at least decent after replacing some of the tracks. "damn connie." you shook your head, pushing your mirror back up.

your music got interrupted by a phone call, you glance at your phone, not even looking at the contact before hitting answer. "yeah?" you said, putting your phone in the cup holder.

"wassupppp."

you rolled your eyes, "yes im going connie." you said, taking a turn down erens neighborhood. "well you late." connie said boredly on the other end. "why you wearin that tiny ass skirt?"

you frowned, picking up your phone and looking, not even realizing you were on factime. "why you lookin?" you smiled, sitting your phone in your lap. connie clicked his tongue. "watch yo mouth." he said, walking through the party, at least that's what it looked like.

as you pulled up on the side of the road near erens house, you turned your car off and took your seatbelt off, looking at your phone as you got out of the car. "ima see you in here right?" you walked up to the house, already seeing people on the porch and on the side of the house.

"i hope not." connie mumbled, smiling to see if you found his joke funny.

you hung up.

"not in the mood." you mumbled, opening the door and letting yourself, trying to push past everyone and find where eren and the rest of them were.

"y/nnnn!" sasha jumped up, along with mikasa, hugging you. "i heard about you" mikasa whispered in your ear. you pulled away and frowned at sasha. "dont ask me bout shit else." you pointed at her.

"ight, ight, fuck the kumbaya. wassup y/n." ony dapped you up. "hey ony." you smiled. "damn we cant get no hey?" eren frowned, holding his arms out, referring to him and armin. "can you give me time to speak? hey armin." you waved at armin.

you sat down beside connie, who was looking around the party the whole time. you nudged him a little, the rest of the group babbling about random things.

"you remember what i said right?" you looked at him as he continued looking away.

"bout reiner? yeah, ian worried bout that no mo'." he shrugged, taking a sip from whatever was in his styrofoam cup. your eyes rested on him, you obviously not believing him. connie looked at you and shrugged again. "i swear im not gon touch him." he said, looking you in the eye.

you pursed your lips together before standing up. "sash, mika, come with me, im bouta go get a margarita." you said, making your way to the kitchen and opening the cooler. "girl, why connie lookin so tense?" mikasa frowned, grabbing one after you. you slowly shook your head, finally deciding to tell them about what happened.

"he mad about something that happened between me and reiner. he just got aggressive and grabbed my wrist. connie saw the bruise and i told him not to do nothing 'cus i don't want him to get involved, but he stubborn." you shook your head, taking a sip from your margarita.

mikasa and sasha frowned. "y/n, you wasn't thinking on tellin us about this?" mikasa looked at your wrist. the bruise only faded a little. you looked at the ceiling with a groan. "i don't wanna involve nobody." you mumbled.

you really didn't understand why they wanted to know. yeah, he did put his hands on you, and if anything, you should've told the whole group, knowing they'd jump his ass in a heartbeat.

but you were so damn scared of reiner, you didn't know what he'd do if he caught you by yourself.

"what the fuck he do that for?" sasha squinted. "he thought somethin' was going on between me and connie 'cus hes a fuckin idiot."

"oh yeah, connie needa whoop his ass." mikasa glanced back at where connie and everyone else was. "i know." your lips formed a line, your eyes roaming around the room.

speak of the devil.

they landed right on reiner, who was walking through the crowd. your eyes widened and they went straight to connie. "i know that aint the muh'fucka right there!" sasha pointed. "shit." your eyebrows furrowed.

mikasa looked at you, straight in the eyes.

"y/n. reiner put his hands on you. you don't have a choice but to let connie beat his ass."

you were hesitant.

if you did let that happen, that could mean reiner would target you the most. but if it didnt happen, youd have to hide whatever you and connie had going on.

you didn't wanna hide anything. no, you didn't have to hide anything. you're not a child, you do whatever you wanna do, you fight back whenever you wanna fight.

but seems like before you could even give connie the permission to do anything, he beat you to it. you heard screaming around the spot you'd just left. you, sasha, and mikasa running over and through the crowd to see what was happening.

to your surprise, not only connie was throwing punches, but ony, and eren too. armin recording everything while laughing. with your lips parted and your eyes widened, you walked over to the other side to get a better view of what was happening to reiner and stood there, staring down at him.

his nose leaking, and bruises forming around different parts of his face.

he was trying his best to fight back but getting jumped by three strong guys wasn't the easiest trap to get out of.

"you like puttin yo hands on females? you a bitch." connie said as everyone else got pulled off of him. "dumb ass nigga." ony mumbled, aggressively fixing his clothes as some of his other homeboys pulled him outside to calm down.

"you a whole weirdo ass bitch! jumping one person 'cus you cant fight for yo damn self!" you saw historia run up to reiner, rushing to help him up.

she was always the main problem in your relationship, but just like connie defended you, you were gonna defend him.

"he shoulda never put his damn hands on me, if you got a problem we can take this shit outside too, or nah?" you raised your eyebrows, taking your phone from the side of your skirt to give it to sasha or mikasa, somebody nearby.

you might've been scared of reiner, but you wasn't scared of no little ass girl, or no girl in general.

historia frowned at you before looking at reiner. "whoop her ass." reiner mumbled to historia. that was your cue.

"come on man, ion got no time to waste on yo ass. i can get this over with quick." you shook your head, rushing outside and to your car, grabbing sweatpants from your backseat and throwing them over your skirt.

as everyone had their phones out, you got in the middle of the circle, mikasa and sasha standing behind you to make sure ymir or annie didn't jump in. you pulled your sweatpants up, rolling them up as adrenaline rushed through your body.

as mikasa tied your hair up, she eyed the rest of historias friends. you had no idea where connie was, nor were you worried about it.

"come on y/n." eren mumbled, his hands on his knees as he leaned over, waiting for you and historia to get your round in.

as she stepped in the middle of the circle, her minions screaming for her and most people screaming for you. you posted up, getting your hands ready, as you both went in a circle waiting for someone to swing first, you wasted no time to start throwing straight punches, no hair pulling, no pulling in general.

"whoop her ass y/n, you know what to do! yeah!" sasha cheered you on over the amount of people yelling.

historia was throwing punches, deciding to grab your hair and hold your head down, you, automatically mirroring her actions and pulling her to the side of you, making her trip over her own feet, pulling you down with her.

when you opened your eyes, you saw blood leaking down her face, just like reiner. she tried to kick you off of her, as you felt somebody grab your shoulders, you got more pissed by the seconds.

"let my hair go dumb bitch!" you yelled, whoever was grabbing your shoulders let go and you felt people crowd more around you, the screaming getting louder.

"ight, come on, come on." connie mumbled, grabbing you by your waist, trying to pull you off of historia, someone doing the same to her. but you didn't let go, still swinging hard licks, hitting her in her head and forehead.

"let go, y/n come on." connie frowned, trying his best to pull you away, as he turned his back towards historia, you still had a good grip on her hair. finally deciding to let go, and bring a chunk of her hair with you, you frowned, trying to make your way out of connies arms while yelling violent nothings.

"that bitch know to never fuck wit' me, ion even know why she tried it! she should know bout me!" you yelled, getting dragged away. "shut up bitch, you mad cus reiner finally found the one!" you saw her yelling.

"bitch you wanted beef bout a nigga that be bussin nut and knots in yo mouth, shut up bitch!"

"hush, hush, hush, you drunk. come on." connie mumbled, dragging you towards your car, continuing to hold you. "all three of yall got it out, come on." connie put his hand over your mouth to make you shut up.

you frowned up at him before looking at the ground.

"you good, just calm down. ight? i gotchu." connie mumbled, glancing back at a pissed off eren, storming towards his house.

"he ain't gon hurt you no mo', ight? just get in the car and calm down." connie mumbled. "i wanna go back in the house, ian drunk yet." you muttered, looking back at the house.

"you tryna fight, so no. get in the car bruh." connie looked back again, seeing historias small group leave the house.

"im not gon do nothing to the bitch, ima let her be mad bout a nigga." you mumbled. "i just wanna get drunk." you muttered.

connie looked at you for a few seconds before sighing, slowly nodding. "ima stay for a few mo minutes, but im goin home soon. gotta calm myself down." he muttered, grabbing your hand and leading you back towards the house.

you huffed. "okay."

chap.8

[opal-owl-flight]

can I ask about the poster "agent 3" kids story?

Yes you can and here it all is!! Presenting…

tldr: She comes from a family of big name actors in the industry, and shes been raised from hatching to continue their legacy. Its…a lot of pressure to put on a kid, especially one who just wants to make her (impossible to satisfy) family proud. Despite being surrounded by impossible standards, the fakest friends chosen for her, being given everything she can ever want (except what she really needs), and putting on a hundred masks for everyone in her life for survival’s sake in a cutthroat industry, she chooses to be kind.

more details under the cut!!

Her name is Sariwa, which means “fresh” . Named for her spring green tentacles and as a blessing from her parents that shed stay youthful, beautiful. a hope that she would be seen and be adored (as freshness implies coolness/popularity in sploonworld).

Shes hatched into the acting industry, with both parents being big in the industry. From hatching she was expected, trained to be an actor like her mother is. The media adores them, this “sweet little family”, but no one knows how nefarious everything is when the cameras are off.

The dad is neglectful, disappearing into meetings most of the time. The mom is a helicopter parent to make up for it. Pointing out every flaw that Sariwa apparently has in either performance or appearance. Never giving praise. Except when she performs “well enough” on stage. This instills in the child this need to make them proud. to…to make everyone happy. She becomes someone whose dependent on other peoples’ praise to function.

Shes given everything else, dont get me wrong. Every material thing she’ll ever need. all the big popular “friends” chosen for her. But…shes not allowed to turf. yknow. biggest event in an inkling’s life here in Inkopolis. and shes not allowed to go to school either. shes too busy memorizing lines for adverts or-

The second she turned 14, she was chosen as the lead role for Cuttlegear’s brand new show abt Agent 3. She looked exactly like the legendary hero, according to the sources. All her time went into this project. Thankfully, unlike at home…her co-actors were very kind. Her parents didnt choose for her this time. She was meeting actual people who dont put on masks beyond their job. the actor they got for Cuttlefish, in particular, is a very kind soul, defending her when the directors get too pissy with her performance. (Those are the only people she fears, tbh shes fearful of most authority figures.)

*Cuttlefish is also depicted as kind and supportive in the show. and in most games. Unlike the real Cuttlefish, which is kind of a loony old man who pushes ideas on young inklings. He still gives more support and kindness that 3s dad ever gave, but thats only RELATIVE to how little he gave in the first place. One can only imagine the longing this inspires in the real 3.

Sariwa…since shes hatched shes had to put on an act. Be the perfect little doll for her parents. For the world. But her friends here, they inspired her to…have fun with what shes doing again. To take off the mask (mostly beyond the clock). Breathe life in the character when she can. (But lets be real…shes getting 3 spot on with how many parallels they have with each others lives.)

But what is she beyond the mask, her role? She wasnt allowed to do anything beyond this. She was forced to depend on her abusive parents and their associates. She cant live alone beyond them. Not allowed to turf bc shes “a prim and proper young lady; above such violent drivel that only delinquents participate in”. They gesture to 3, whos one of the faces Squidforce uses in their promotions, and say (ironically.) that she must not become that. Face ripped to shreds and eye mangled.

No one knows they got that from the real war that Sariwa is pretending to show.

The show does its best to be an accurate telling. Child friendly, to a point. Horrifying things still get kept in somewhat. Things that will horrify a child on stage.

If Sariwa is terrified of the props, can you imagine how it was for 3?

————————

And once she realizes all of this. Once she gets out of this situation thanks to Callie, Marie, and 3 themself. Does she feel guilt? Guilt for depicting the horrors in a way that glorifies it instead? A part of a project that aims to make people complacent to the real horrors that churned below?

There is one thing Sariwa feels about 3, that I am aware of rn.

“Im glad, that out of every story I couldve told, Im glad it was yours.”

Just like 8, she sung this tale in her hearts. Just like 8, she used this to break out of this terrible situation, answering the call of the ones who promised her safety. A better life. Like the way she stage broke through that prop in the choreographed Octavio fight, she broke through the influence of those around her.

*She actually went off-script a bit in that scene. After she beat down Octavio, she held out her hand. Mostly to help the actor up. But then, without realizing, she spoke, she spoke of making things better between the nations. That maybe he doesnt have to steal the zapfish anymore.

Her time with the octoling actors, and hearing the stories from the ex-octarians, made her aware and know the fact that theyre people too. The directors kept it in. They knew that if they released this as they have planned it, there will be fuckign riots from the ex-octarians or the Inkling “sympathizers���.

She saw the value this story held, despite the subliminal messaging that she wished wasnt implemented. That she wished she wasnt a part of. She saw that its a tale of hope. A tale that inspires one to become the hero of their own life. A tale that inspires one to make the world a better place.

————————

So she was hatched and raised to make people smile, singing her songs and dancing their dances. Much like the clan singer that was 4, except the tradition is much more healthy compared to industry standard. And she didnt become as mean as the people around her, at least not internally. She put on a mean mask but she felt the void within. When she was given kindness for a long enough time, she put her walls down.

And just like the real 3, she underwent through the horrors of expectations she had to hold up, and trying to make uninterested parents proud. They dont see her as their daughter, shes just a means to an end. She had to wear a hundred masks to survive and it made her lose her sense of identity. She had to be mature, she had to take the shitty behavior of adults who expect her to be like one too. It made her lose grip of who she is beyond this role. Hell, they made her so dependent on their handouts that shes not sure she can exist beyond this hell. Much like how 3 struggles to know a life beyond their duty.

And much like 8, she used the story she was telling to break out and get herself in a better situation. She met with the real Agents 1 and 2 (without her knowledge) and asked. Begged. for help, after her show ended. (3 also kind of pointed the two in her direction. Bc cod knows how horrifying this industry is. Shes lucky she didnt get any of the grosser horrors ~~its bc I didnt feel comfortable writing such topics~~)

And then shes faced with the same problem all the real legends faced. What comes after the end? When the dust clears, what happens next? She wasnt given a damn choice, she wasnt allowed to try to learn things beyond this role. to be beyond an imagined agent 3. a soldier for the screen. who is she now, that shes out of that battlefield?

little does she realize that the real 3s asking the same question for themself.

[whosthere54]

Ok ok ok Royal au Royal au ararararah

now to yap about my Royal au cause I’m normal. (Longer post- I just infodump about my AU basically-)

So what I have in drafts is all mainly brothers or prison duo centric, as if you know my fics I usually write from Icarus’s perspective on things. The main ships I would be focusing on are ghaae, nightingstar, Wolftross, and then prison duo- but I have cameos of all of the cannon ships of course. I’m gonna kind of just go through and explain roles of my main guys tho- so hope you like this as a sort of starting summary? I guess?

Icarus is the crown prince of the gilded kingdom. Basically the other full representative of the overworld who’s not Fable. Basically, they are heir to the throne, have to maintain a public image, help Fable out with royal duties and pretty much prepare to be the next monarch to ensure a smooth transition if “mortal king Fable” passes away. (He can’t die- I’ll get to that maybe- but yknow. God.)

I’ll talk about Isla and things later in this post, so I won’t mention it now- but yeah. Icarus is the only heir to the gilded kingdom.

Centross is Icarus’s bodyguard (yes I’m going down that road for the prison duo content. I’m so unpredictable /silly/sarc/lh) Royal guard? Close enough probably. Which- idk if I have to get into what he does. I think you can assume. Protection stuff. He was a former assassin, having used to work with Enderian. I’m doing a cliche maybe- but- yknow- he was sent to kill Icarus, ended up unable to do so… so now he’s a bodyguard for them instead of going back to Enderian. (There’s probably a promise of mutual protection somewhere- I’m sure Icarus would not have let Fable give them a bodyguard before then, and when he did they’d make it everyone’s problem- instead wanting to prove they could protect themself. There’s something there. Yeah.)

Wolftross is yes a thing, I think they were probably together for a while- maybe not long after he first became a royal guard. At Icarus’s request, he can visit Fenris whenever he wants probably. Easton replaces him when he’s gone (even after he became blind- at Icarus’s request he will continue that role. They trust him- and he’s capable.)

In the one thing I wrote, I gave him end features as well. I’m moreso debating on that- but I think it’d be a cool thing as a byproduct of being one of Enderian’s closest advisors and trusted assasin. Or- I give them to him later when he gets to be god. He gets them at some point- for me.

Rae is the crown prince of the end kingdom- full representative of the end that is not Enderian. I’d think she gives him more freedom than Icarus gets from fable, her being the end mother she is. She did have the same I guess cruel past that she does in cannon- I’m trying to figure out how I’m translating s1 into this AU still, and maybe you’ll get a oneshot of that eventually. Atleast the prison arc- of course. He left the gilded kingdom (either with Isla, or later on his own I have drafts for. But- probably with Isla) and lived with Isla for a bit- she runs for help from soul and things like in cannon and she helps hide them for a bit. Though- Isla ends up having Rae stay with Enderian. She probably stays as long as she can without compermising Rae’s safety, but maybe gets caught by Fable eventually.

Fenris is Rae’s bodyguard. He is a former general for the Nether’s army, just like in cannon. (I have to rewatch some of his lore before confidently talking about how he gets to become Rae’s bodyguard, so I’m sorry I won’t have too much info at the moment <3)

He becomes Rae’s bodyguard later- Enderian probably heard of his reputation as “the wolf” and hired him. (May try to include the wolf arc- but am again, trying to figure out how to integrate it.)

Now- basic plot summary? Something of the sort? Yeah. Some random details too cause I have no one train of thought ever and am just writing whatever I think of down. /lh

So for some backstory- Islas story is basically the same as in lore. But it changes for that bit after Rae was born just to adhere to the different circumstances Royal AU brings to the table. So, Rae grows a bit before Isla takes him and runs in this AU- he’s older, couldn’t tell you how old (age is a lie/silly/j) but just. A child. She notices how he’s being treated by Fable, takes him and leaves. She doesn’t take Icarus. There’s a lot of consideration for that fact- of course there is. Their her child. But- they’re not close, Fable makes sure of that. They spend most of their time with him, and their his heir after all. Their disappearance would be the worst to explain. So she doesn’t take them with her.

She takes Rae, and over the course of a few years- stays in a sort of safe house like in cannon, learns the things she does there, goes to soul for help, all that stuff. But she ends up taking Rae to Enderian, he becomes crown prince. She stays with them until it compromises Rae’s safety. Fable finds her, she doesn’t give away that she’d stayed with Enderian and that stays secret for a long time. Fable finds her, messes with her memories and things (he’s messed with Icarus’s too at this point- probably erasing Rae entirely) end she goes into a coma. He locks her away, Icarus doesn’t even know she’s here- and ends up having no memories of her anyways. Only fable knows where she’s locked away. Some tower in the castle sleeping beauty style probably.

Rae grows up in the end kingdom, Icarus grows up in the overworld.

Rae meets Caspian in the end prison- advocating for his freedom and things. He gets him a place in the end kingdom, and they get together at a peaceful festival in the overworld. That is an annual festival- Rae meets aax and takes her there too. He and Cas talk- and probably end up asking Aax out there too- making a whole day out of it probably. It’s a tradition for them, after all.

Aax lives with Cas, and Rae stays with them on weekends? Mayhaps? Something like that. He’s allowed to visit them whenever.

I like to think maybe Cas helps Athena and Bruin run the bakery on occasion. Bed and breakfast. Idk. Rae is definelty still the taste tester on Aax safe foods. And also a waiter on opening day for multiple reasons- one, it’s funny- two, yknow. Royal press. Media(?) purposes. Yknow what I mean hopefully.

Also- end kingdom I think had parts in the overworld and end? Like- overworld has the stronghold portal as the center and then made a kingdom around that, and then there’s an end part of the kingdom. This was probably a result of a peace treaty Isla had led years before between the realms after the war. Because badass mother deserves it. But to explain that- yeah. I think the Nether doesn’t- but has a trading hub spreading through portals and things. Yknow. Just not kingdom- I think the overworld is still more cold to people from the nether so. No kingdom. But portals can be made anywhere instead of having just one like the end, so that makes sense.

Gilded kingdom is just the biggest kingdom in the overworld areas we know- as Fable is the god of creation. I just have cool ideas for kingdom designs. May build them in Minecraft actually who knows- (if I do I will in fact post the pictures)

The Aether kingdom was a thing for souls and stuff as it was in cannon, but fell the same way. Alerion and Will live peacefully in one of the overworld kingdoms living normal lives away from everything, as they deserve.

A lot of the fable characters probably lives in the overworld, and just travel between realms.

Athena’s house probably has an area like his lab, where half is in the overworld and half is in the nether. If not, maybe their bed and breakfast- or atleast she has some nether bakery locations maybe with nether specific treats! Cause I think they deserve it and I just think it’d be cool.

Will has a cartographers shop in his village- like a cartographer villager type thing.

Rae has his archives he runs in his kingdom, there are two- one in the overworld part and one in the nether.

Starbarks definelty exists, does Fenris cannonly in this AU run all of the businesses he runs in actual cannon? Probably not. Do they exist? Probably.

Ven works as a close advisor for Fable, and Ari is hired as a knight or general of a sort for fable. Maybe more like a spy. Cat scratch records exist probably.

The world sisters do exist, most likely- (logistically if this was like a alternate “fable raises Icarus AU” they probably wouldn’t but I can do what I want and I say they’re here cause I love them- /silly)

Addie- Addie idk- maybe they work on like a night shift for the archives? Or like as an intern.

Ulysses- idk where to put Ulysses. Oh you silly fish man you. I will incorporate all the telchin stuff, definetly, I think just think of the cannon lore for that one.

Also- Quixis is there somewhere. Probably not in the same way for plot- but gotta include them in every au somehow /silly

Yeah. Royal AU. I’m eepy so I shut up- but hope you like my rambling ig idk-

I didn’t realize y’all enjoyed this au that much- I appreciate all the excitement about it /gen tehe <3

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

It Had To Be You

Before I get into my big explaining rant, reblogs are very much appreciated! I know this is usually a rant blog but when I spend so long on a drawing I want to have people see it and stare at it like I do LOL

Also for the ALT text, a lot of the details are going to be explained below so if you’d like extra details please read!

So, my designs! I really hate Husk’s design; as in I hate drawing it. It’s too red and tiny for me, Husk is very orange and round to me, he’s like a really chubby cat that you flip over in the bed and smack their belly and kiss em. He also kinda reminds me of Tigerstar from Warriors but like if he was a more morally correct person. Kind of. I removed all of the red from Husk and replaced it with little motifs of orange and brown like in his ears, his eyebrows, wings, and the little patch on his snout. For his wings I tried to base them around a Brown Thrasher because they fit the colour I needed and they’re very defensive birds which is a trait I’d like to see in Husk more. Seeing him protecting others with his wings in Episode 8 was a very cute touch and I want more of that. Oh and the little orange bit on his snout was based on one of my old cats named Whiskey and I thought that was fitting cause yknow. Whiskey. 🥃. Also it’s cute!

Part of Husk’s orange colouration also falls under some inspiration I received from @bluehazardanonymous whom you may see on my blog again. But they sent me a very interesting colour chart and it made my brain go funny

Husk’s design has a lot of orange, yellow, and small hints of red like his undone bowtie and hat band/ace of hearts card. The orange for gluttony is mostly related to alcohol and such, meanwhile the yellow in his eyes, shirt patch, and on the button on his hat are to show greed from things like gambling and possible leftovers from being an overlord. I don’t think you can just go from being all powerful to some random bartender and NOT have some kind of thirst for power right???? That also bleeds into the red parts (haha cause blood red) to keep his design on the warm side and have a little bit of anger in there.

His clothes are also supposed to look a bit sloppy and kinda sad cause I mean. He is. But they are also all relatively formal items of clothing. By the way I’m never drawing this guy shirtless, sorry you need to beg and pay for that/j

Now for Angel. With Angel being pink-ish and how I usually draw the rest of Hell, I try to make Hell more gross looking and greenish/sickly, generally unpleasant, so that Angel is more eye catching and pops out more like a celebrity would. A lot of the cast in my head is more orange/maroon coloured, not a lot of pink or salmon colours. Of course pink is under lust on the colour wheel, but I personally don’t like chalking Angel up to just his job, nor do i really like using “true” pink. I always keep him in this range:

Also that white is not for him it’s for other things, I always make him a cream-ish colour. I like pink with red undertones always, especially for Angel. It shows his job very blatantly if you take a simple glance at him, but if you’re nuts like me and colour pick from these that I use, you’ll see a lot of them are closer to red, rather than the bright pink-ish-purple colour for lust. And also closer to his original more purple design!

I think it goes without saying that Angel has a lot of pent up anger and frustration that he hides with his persona and humour, and I think trying to show some of that in his colours is a lot more interesting than just haha pink gay spider. I dunno.

Also I thought these little cowlick flip thingies on the side were really cute

I was originally going to make the sign in the back purple since that’s usually the colour of most XXX signs in Hazbin, but the yellow makes everything else look a lot more dingy and gross while still being bright and I love that. Also the yellow is kind of a shallow jab of my own at the adult entertainment industry, a lot of this stuff is just people being exploited for money but I will go on a tangent about this if I don’t shift topic!! Anyway. A lot of the background isn’t super visible, but based on the colours I was kinda going for a more envy & wrath & greed section of the pride ring. Just seems like a good place to smoke. The rain doesn’t hold much symbolism to it but it is there to make the area seem more unpleasant. Yknow how it rains sometimes and the sewage in the street comes up? Like that.

Im really happy with a bunch of stuff in this art. 10 hours, 184+ layers, and 11751 strokes is probably the most I have ever done for.. anything????? Even if you don’t like the art I hope you appreciate the long rant LOL

Be sure to have a good day and drink something ‼️

[implalazz]

Waaaaaaaaa I’m back with more yokai fusions & also a comically small Buchikoma

L-R: Blazitina, RoboGrapenyan, Damonono, Buchikoma, Komajisan, Pandatina

Again more design thoughts under tha cut ✌️

My fingers always feel sore after typing this much….. Lots of learning about the details of traditional clothes this time. I chose these pairings cuz I felt lazy & wanted to draw the simpler ones first lol

Blazitina: Lion girl 👍 First thing I can think of in my thought process was making the belt an obi sash. Tattered at the ends to batch Blazion’s & with an obijime for fun. I didn’t super feel like giving her the same kind of Miku-esque kimono sleeves that I gave Lord Lie-In so I just made them weird kinda arm warmers. Did the same for her pants too, I’m not sure what they’re called but they’re inspired by the leg warmer kinda things in PLA on the fancy kimono. Also gave her a juban cuz idk I made her gi dip too far under her arms & yknow she’s a little lady she’s gotta stay covered up. I know all of this traditional kimono gear isn’t conductive to good karate but whatever…… She doesn’t get boots cuz I like drawing paws & her ahoge mimic Blazion’s scar (I didn’t have enough room to fit it in). I was thinking of giving her an x shaped hair clip but I thought it’d be too busy on her head. Overall despite some things I’d change (the way I shaped the obi I know realize the shape is TOO stylistic) I think this is my favourite design of the bunch

RoboGrapenyan: Very much inspired by the pkmn Violet paradox mons* (*See the bells & eyes.) Not much to say it’s a pretty straightforward fusion. The tail onibi are lightbulbs because it feels more robotic & I thought it’d be cool. The jet exhaust is grape soda……. That was a choice. LOOK I’LL EXPLAIN, uh….. grape….. grape exhaust? Grape vapor? Grape soda????? Sure. Also I think in the back of my mind I was thinking of that soda gun from that one episode of SpongeBob. Naughty Nautical Neighbors. I had to google it I had to know what episode it was….. yeah.

Damonono: YAAAAYYYYY FIRST TIME DRAWING HAKAMA THEY’RE WEIRD BUT I’LL GET BETTER AT IT!! They’re supposed to be split leg hakama but in every reference I looked up they’re so wide that they just look like the skirt kind rather than having two leg holes. I gave them hakama cuz bootleg jeans would be weird with a kimono. And I like hakama. That’s it. The sleeves….. Let’s talk about those. I didn’t wanna give them the heart guns/cannons cuz idk…. I liked the way Damona’s hands were posed & I wanted to keep that. So instead they have weird fucked up heart shaped kimono sleeves. I wanted to keep Damona’s long obi too but I thought it might mess with the silhouette already having the sleeves & also that’s just not a thing you do with hakama. So….. her sleeves are kind of like the end of her obi…….. I’m only now realizing she could’ve had them tied up normally & they could still hang that low….. whatever. In my mind they go under the obi, get tied up so they can put on the hakama, & then untie them & let them hang over the hakama. Look I don’t think of fashion in terms of is this normal? Is this practical? If it looks good I do it. Not much else to say. I had to look up a tutorial on how to put on hakama cuz I wanted them to be as accurate as possible……. And now I know how to put them on so that’s cool I guess. I LOVE LEARNING!!!!!!!!

Buchikoma: Again pretty simple. I gave him a little tuft of hair to emulate Buchinyan’s wispy hair tuft. I forgot to draw the spot of the side of the right thigh, lol. His eye spot is shaped like an onibi cuz it’s cute 👍. His haramaki has the patterning of Jibakoma’s tummy spot cuz I can’t not give him the haramaki that’d be a crime. His ears are farther apart & smaller like Jibakoma’s, & his tail onibi are shaped like that cuz idk I tried to imagine what Jibakoma’s tail looked like & I thought of that. Overall another one of my favourite yokai fusions I’ve done. That’s my son

Komajisan: SPLIT EARS!!!!! Inspired by a fandom design of a certain character from a certain comic I won’t name….. IYKYK. Split ears cuz 2. Also extra swirly bits on the swirls cuz 2. I was thinking of adding blue spots to his bindle but I didn’t like how it looked so I didn’t do it. Fun paw spots cuz it’s cute. Forehead onibi are kinda angry lookin cuz idk….. I just felt it. Also mini onibi in between the forehead ones cuz 2. Some makeup accenting cuz……. IT’S CUTE!!!!!!!! I was also thinking of making the onibi half brown & half blue but it looked bad so yeah, I didn’t do it.

Pandatina: Probably my favourite in terms of lineart. I actually got noticeably better at drawing kimono particularly the sleeves. I’m proud :]. I honestly didn’t feel like giving her a haori/cape/whatever so I didn’t (also I just forgot to lol.) So she has a good sewn into the collar of her kimono. Clover shaped obijime like Slimatina cuz it looks cool & I like it, also I needed more clover shapes lol. She’s got one in her hair because of that too, I was thinking of making it blue but I thought nahh. She’s intentionally very pale cuz I wanted her skin tone to really match the snake part of her body. And she has eyeshadow on to emulate the spots around Pandanoko’s eyes, same with her pupils. Again just a simple fusion

[queer-enderdragon]

ok so. after a few rewatches, im just gonna list out what we got so far (is easier to remember written out yknow):

so ivory of course has a past, undisclosed so far, but at least she has experience Working, which. mixed with that detail that she went to whitepine with Nothing but the clothes she was given and something about "needing something stable" after being Found is... odd

she also seems to need permission to do things (even going for food), fears the anger of others and over-shots tasks given... and man, if that doesnt hit somewhere close to home—but she still has a will, that when she seems to want something she at least tries to act on, e.i: asking to go outside to see the garden, asking to play the piano even if she already seem to want to play it immediately after finding it. like i mentioned in other post; quiet in the outside, loud in the inside

and speaking of the piano and music because i just. really want to focus on it

most of the scenes in the trailer happened in the first episode, but two or three, specially: the last clip with her playing mountain ash as it's reprise. and you know, a reprise is usually used as an end or change in a story,

and i dont know... something about how the piano is positioned, making her back be the part of her to face the door

and did yall notice the first time Ivory plays the piano, is the normal version of mountain ash? is only one note, but is the same appearing at the end credits too

i really like the heaviness in it, and how slow is in comparation to the reprise... but it makes me wonder when exactly is going to change to the other version... like i mean, there was already a murder, and maybe this is just me overthinking the music, but to get to That speed on the reprise i feel like things may start being more familiar to ivory And piling up on the manor from here until then

and like many other pointed out, there's something about the trees, the outside, the windows. an odd focus to things surrounding whitepine, or the vastness of it. how... empty it is for the most part

and there's more things im pretty sure, and i myself definitely have Many more thoughts on this, only problem is that for now it seems i cant get them out of the tangle of everything in my brain. and who knows, maybe with a few more episodes they'll untangle themselves

as in, as a sentiment i'll say i cant wait for more, but at the same time i'll wait for as long as needed, because by gods this looks to be Really good, and good needs time (but i really cant wait for more music from ivory, if its not obvious <3)

[50cal-fullauto-astarion]

Blah blah blah, massive jerking off motion, sugar daddy Colonel König with a f!reader!30 year old, established sugar baby doing it for a laff fic bullet point idea I've been bullshitting around with under the cut:

Again, bc y'all know me, this is just my fuckin oc dressed up as a reader but yknow what whatever. It’s my maladaptive daydream and I’m generalizing enough to share it.

You’re a doctor of organic chemistry, working in pharmaceutical forensics at a lab that largely deals with multinational jurisdiction drug offenses for various state agencies. The work pays pretty well, as it’s government scale, but it is dull and repetitive.

To get your kicks, you sugar baby casually on a semi-regular to regular basis. It suits you. You’ve never established a meaningful long term relationship, flings come easily to you, and older would-be romancers have always taken interest in you in ways that people from your own age bracket haven’t.

Sex or no, it all depends on who is approaching you, the decision ultimately yours.

And they don’t have to provide monetarily, no. You’re well established, more than that even. Once they understand that aspect of you, they shift their approach, and that’s when the fun starts.

Gifts, trips, concerts, dinners—whatever you want, all of it a discreet text away.

None of your entanglements last terribly long. You’re off-putting, in your way, your mannerisms, your directness. Most of your paramours find that it doesn’t click for them. If you’re having sex, it doesn’t matter how mind blowing it is—usually for your partner, though you’ve had the occasional winner—one way or another it ends. And you have been the one to end it, especially when you feel it growing strained and pointed toward what services you provide your temp partners. You’re no stranger to the sudden and surgical cut.

One such situation leads a Colonel to a spot at your feet.

One of the dudes who wandered into your carousel was Declan O’Conor, of KorTac. He’d been intrigued by your intensity at first, and the sex was some of the best he’d ever had, though you thought he lacked skills in foreplay. He was generally brusque however, and tended to ignore the trade of attention and gifts in favor of his desires, which left you cold and unimpressed.

gonna be real, i left off here like two days ago, and i'm 2 hours into my last work day before my weekend, so i'm not bothering with extra detail, we're wheelin' and dealin' now, lads.

a certain colonel gets a hold of your email through declan, a nanosecond before you dump declan's ass. the timing? immaculate. the colonel could not have done better. isn't he fucking lucky.

he's heard declan bragging about his new bird. she's smart, she's discreet, she fucks like a succubus. she doesn't even want money, or a relationship. shit, she doesn't even care if you're married or have kids, she wants no part of your real life. she just wants fun and stimulation.

well. ain't that just what the colonel is looking for, he lies to himself. könig is almost half convinced you're an escort dressed up as a woman looking for a good time, but what the fuck does he know. and from what he's gathered, the way people approach you is myriad, but you're picky as for how long things go on.

he's drowned at work, has no desire to go bar crawling or trying to pick up a dumbass hobby to try and meet someone, and he, if he's honest with himself, does not have the time to dedicate to an actual relationship, is mildly horrified at the idea of using an app to date, and is approaching his mid 40s. his work is too demanding, he travels too much, he's too burnt out. fun sounds fun.

he shoots off the email.

what he gets in return: "interesting that o'conor seems to be recommending me around, as that's not part of the agreement. but i'll meet you. tell me when you're next in berlin, and we'll set a date. should it cross your mind, bring me something interesting."

smth smth, time moves on, you end up meeting up with him for dinner. he insisted. he knew a place. you hoped like hell it wasn't some overblown officer's club. that shit was always dead boring and full of the most disgusting braggadocio you've heard in your life. testosterone beating off against testosterone, trying to find out which one nuts first.

but, nah. he hauls you to a korean bbq joint that's a real down and dirty hole in the wall, and immediately you're impressed. the food is amazing. it's quiet. he is ENORMOUS, but has an air of cinders about him.

you can tell he used to run off rage, almost solely. it must've burned down over the years, or his fuel had taken a hit that it could never recover from. he's tired. he's looking for ease.

he wears a gaiter covering the bottom half of his face and neck, and you find it curious as the dinner starts, your booth in the far back, away from prying eyes.

thought it was for your comfort. he'd already spoken of your discretion, that he was well aware, and interested in the same. his position in his org is high up, he works with sensitive info, his clearance is big time spooky. things you're familiar with from your own work.

he calls his work security, and you call your own science. it is enough.

he warns you about his facial scarring before the meal begins, giving you the choice to avoid seeing him eat, and you turn down that offer. "i can assure you that i've seen worse," you say, confident, unshaken at what he might be hiding. your history is a darkness, it runs deep, and ruin is not unfamiliar to you.

he seems pleased, or at least mollified, and pulls down the gaiter. the lower half of his face is a wreckage, almost at odds with the wheat colored curls - all shot through with silvery-gray - tied into a tail at the base of his skull, and the blue of his bag-bruised eyes. a botched cleft lip surgery, exposing big, fuck-around-find-out teeth in a scar that leaves him always snarling. rippling burn scars crawling up from his ravaged neck, pulling at the corner of his eye.

at least he will eat, if nothing else.

it is one of the rare times he will allow you to see this.

at the end of the meal, after some good conversation, dancing light around heavy realities, secrets that can't be told, you sit back and watch him with curiosity-heavy eyes, a contentedly full stomach, the foot of your crossed leg hovering in the air between you under the table.

he's pulled his gaiter back up, peeling euro bills off a fat clip he pulls from his pocket, dropping them on the table, overpaying the meal. perhaps the privacy. perhaps the server. perhaps the flash of it.

"i didn't forget," he laughs, voice still higher than you'd expected, but rasping and rough as gravel churning mud and blood.

"apologies. i'm impatient. it is my nature."

"hah. have that in common, then, hm?" he laughs, going for another pocket.

usually, you expect jewelry on the first date. it hasn't been uncommon with the people you run with. perhaps even technology. you were afforded an iphone 14 pro max a month before they'd even come out, but you'd held onto it and resold it later.

and this fascinating könig pulls out a box, as well. you almost feel your stomach sink. you'd been hoping...well. it doesn't matter what you'd hope. and maybe it was foolish to harbor a small, chittering desire that he'd be different, after the turns your conversations took.

he plunks it down on the table in front of you, rapping two long, powerful fingers on the plain lid. it's not even that impressive of packaging. oh, your stomach churns with impending disappointment. sometimes these men end up cheap. you steel yourself, falling into your resolve.

a fossilized horse tooth is what is presented to you when you open the package, as well as a business card for a fossil and crystal dealer. you catch sight of a beaded bracelet on his wrist, carnelians.

"didn't know what sort of science you're in, but figured i couldn't go wrong with a fossil. or a horse. you have horse girl energy."

he's smirking. you tip your head back and cackle, mind flooded with your years on your school's equitation team and the summers you spent trekking across continents with your grandmother by horseback.

the energy shifts perfectly, and you pull your head down, beaming at him. running the toe of your heels up his calf under the table, you roll the fossil-black tooth between your fingers, following the grooves, feeling the age. this horse would've been about nine when it died. not bad for a wild thing. most of them didn't find the miracles of old age.

"what gave it away? the posture?"

"oh ja. jawohl. it's the posture. even leaned back, sit like you're setting your ass in a saddle."

"mhm. sounds like you've done some riding yourself."

"when i was younger, yes. half-sway-backed plow nag, though. nothing so fancy as what people might picture, with the accent."

"not everyone can afford warmbloods, it is true."

you fold the tooth into your closed hand, silence falling comfortable between you. and here it is.

"i think we should find a place for the night, don't you?" you ask, and you can see his mouth pull into a smirk under the mask.

"hah. good thing i thought ahead then. i booked a room--some place nice. you'll like it." his confidence would be off-putting. it should be off-putting. but it isn't. it's almost a relief. it's definitely a turn on. he's not feeling out your approval, at least not visibly.

you were both looking for fun. and perhaps you've found it. at the very least, he is not treating this as a fight to be won. maybe he would not've been crushed or vitriolic if the night ended with nothing further, ever again. you don't know. you let him help you into your coat, and into a cab, and you find your flesh-ripping want yelling louder and louder with his arm draped casually across the back of the seat behind you.

and good christ, does can he fuck.

okidoke, i'm cutting this one here, sry. i will probably continue it more formally (? idk) later once i've worked on some other stuff, but i wanted to get this one out, yeehaw. hope u enjoyed!

[askzombo]

the camera shakes before focusing on a blond man, sitting next to a small campfire. he looks a bit confused for a moment, before realizing the person holding the camera had begun filming, "oh hi.. everyone? i don't know who can see these, i'm assuming its not only the diamond swords watching these anymore! i'm evbo, and the guy behind the camera is ferre- he doesnt like being on these much, but he'll also respond to anything you all have to say! anything else you think we should add, ferre?"

"maybe mention the fact everyone is dead?" a voice, supposedly ferre, behind the camera chimes sarcastically.

"oh yeah," evbo huffs, "so, i came down here alone first, expecting a bunch of tridents and axes to beat me up, yknow? but, when i got here, it was dark out, and there were monsters everywhere. more zombies than you could ever imagine, every other civilization has been turned into zombies!" evbo buries his face in his hands, rubbing his eyes harshly in frustration, "i don't- i don't know if tabi-..."

the camera pans to the ground, and ferre speaks again, "ok, i think thats enough. if tabi is out there, we dont want her to know we've survived the zombies too." evbo agrees with a small 'yeah', and the camera focuses on him again, "now pose for the camera," ferre requests, the smallest bit of playfulness in his tone.

"okay..?"

"hey! turn that filter off, that better not have been on the whole time!"

!!ask rules + art ref under cut!!

hi!! admin evan here! ^^7 this is my first askblog so pls be patient with me!

-this blog does have a plot! it has an end goal but how they get there might be affected by asks!

-magic anons are allowed! zombie anons are highly encouraged!! (characters will be aggressive and attempt to kill zombie anons, but can fail and be injured/die!)

-only art posts will be tagged as pvp civ! the rest will be tagged with "ask zombo", but wont be main tagged to avoid clogging the fandom tags!!

-nsfw is allowed, admin and all characters are adults, unless stated otherwise! all posts with nsfw content will be marked with "nsfw" "suggestive" and "cw suggestive" mute those if you dont want to see that content!! (there will be summaries for any lore that is missed in those asks, so dont worry abt missing anything!) (minors dni with those posts or send nsfw asks, you will be blocked) tutorial on how to mute tags!!

-along that same vein, this isnt a nsfw blog. i wont draw nsfw here, and any spam nsfw asks will not be answered.

-im a very slow artist! please be patient if your ask is taking particularly long, im either busy or drawing it!! (i work extra on weekends so expect slow updates fri-sun)

this ref sheet is mostly just for me bcz i WILL forget every detail of these characters as soon as i go to bed tonight LMAO

more characters will be added as they appear!

[crushedsweets]

hey sucker! 😋😋

what would the creeps do for valentine’s day?

like yknow, would some be given small treats or do others treat it like a regular day?

happy belated valentines day! hope you guys had fun and shared some love with everyone around you! this is the closest youre gonna get to x reader content from me.

AGAIN THIS IS SET IN MY AU!!! MY AU IS PRETTY DETAILED AND HAS AN OVERARCHING STORYLINE WITH PRE-ESTABLISHED FRIENDSHIPS, SETTINGS, JOBS, CHARACTER ARCS AND WHATNOT....... so :3 yeah.

Tim and Brian probably don't do much. They'll totally grab some chocolates/candy and eat it, but just cuz its there, not as a gift. if they had a partner, they'd just go get some dinner.. flowers, basic stuff. put on an unironed button up and pick their partner up LOL.

toby might do something depending on where he is in the story. early on, he is not doing SHIIIIT. deep into his friendship with nina(who opens up a lot of his emotional vulnerabilities n stuff), he might feel a little inclined to pick up some flowers for some of the girls in his life (nina, clocky, kate, lazari) just cuz he used to do something small for his sister/mom when he was younger (cuz frank never did shit). if he had a partner, he'd def wanna do jewelry and classic flowers. he likes necklaces and rings and piercings and stuff, doesnt wear them much cuz they get in the way, but likes seeing people wear stuff he got. he's the type to make them turn around so he could put the necklace on them, but if they even slightly laugh at him trying to be sweet, he's getting mad HAHA. "ok nevermind im returning this you fucking suck" (jokingly.. but he is embarrassed). would just wanna stay home though, no nights out or anything

clocky would paint stuff. she'd give nina a portrait of herself cuz nina loooves being someone's muse, do some nice art of forest creatures and leave some notes for toby. she'd feel pretty awkward about it just cuz even when she was with her highschool boyfriend, she wasn't good at giving or receiving affection. if she's gifted any flowers (which she will be getting), she's absolutely pressing them and either sealing them in some paintings, or putting it in frames that hold her old art/art she picked up at thrifts. if she had a partner, she'd obviously paint them or something. i could see her spending a long time working through a journal to gift them, making every 3 pages a painting, drawing, or journal entry expressing something. "today you and i went to get lunch. i think the place was way too expensive, but you liked it." and then empty pages for her partner to fill in with whatever they want.

nina. ok come on. lets be serious. its nina. she's gonna buy everyone(as in toby, clocky, kate, jane, liu) one expensive gift (cologne, watches, shoes, jewelry, makeup) and then throw together mini bouquets, notes, and probably shop lift other smaller stuff cuz 'IM BROKE I SPENT TOO MUCH I HAVE TO' LOLLL.. she's the type to literally decorate her house for it, putting up some of clocky's more romantic paintings (cuz she has a collection of clocky's work), setting out heart-shaped coasters, bringing out heart shaped pillows.... honestly she probably already had those.... she'd absolutely plan galentines dinner for her friends, bake cookies, everything. if she had a partner, it would be really similar. she likes to spoil people, gift giving and acts of service are her ways of showing love - buuuut she does want to be spoiled in return, so physical affection and quality time is what she wants to receive. she wants to be treated like a princess, be picked up, have her doors opened for her, told she looks beautiful, etc.

jack is even less likely to do something than toby. before the sacrifice, he'd grab a cheap bag of individually wrapped chocolates and give them to people he knew around campus. i could see him buying the same chocolates and leaving it in his cabin. telling whoever visits him to take some. nina would leave him some flowers too(say its also from toby) and he'd be really grateful, cuz she'd be very sure to get him whatever he thinks smells the nice. that way he can still appreciate it. if he had a partner, YOU KNOW HE'S COOKING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DINNER AT HOME. he's cleaning up, very awkwardly trying to dress nice. black button up, slacks, slick his hair back(or he'd just do whatever his partner says looks best, not too concerned with his own preference). he'd feel sooo fucking embarrassed and very nervous but he just wants to make it special. he'd write a long love letter, too

jeff isnt doing shit for anyone. he'll go steal some chocolate and mind his own business. if he had a partner, one that he ACTUALLY loved and wanted to keep around. maybe he'd pick up some flowers and chocolate, mainly cuz he knows thats the bare minimum sort of gift. he'd let them demand that day from him, which takes a LOT for him to let anyone feel entitled to HIS time. if he knows they have higher expectations (dinner, a letter, etc) he'd probably bitch and moan and be like "ugh you already know im into you why do i gotta do this shit" but if theyre serious, he'd probably do it. half assed though...

kates also not doing anything unprompted. she wouldnt even know the day is coming around. her only memories of valentines day would be passing out some candy and cards around class in elementary school, but once she was in the forest, nobody gave HER shit. she might pick some flowers and wrap it in some paper for people , but ONLY if she KNOWS they're getting something for her. like, she'd pick nina some flowers cuz she knows ninas doing something regardless, but she wouldnt get toby anything cuz she wouldnt have expected it from him. then shed feel bad. if she had a partner, again it'd be similar. she KNOWS she needs to put in the effort, but she doesnt exactly have the resources... the farm does pay her some cash since she works with the animals, but she mostly just gives it straight to toby so he can buy stuff for the cabin. but she'd keep it this time around, and quietly ask toby if he could come with her to get some stuff for them. some sweets, a necklace, scribble out a little letter. smth sweet.

janes married. and she goes all out of her wife. buys her like a 3dozen bouquet of red roses, sets reservations at nice restaurants, makes mary breakfast the morning of. all of that. i dont even know how to go into detail on this because thats just how it is for her, theres not some turmoil for her to work through. she'd also start getting sally some stuff. plushies holding hearts, balloons, sweet things like that. if she had a partner...WELL SHE ALREADY DOES!!!!

if liu knows nina is going to gift him something expensive, he's doing the same. he's going to grab her flowers and maybe some shoes or something he knows she's had her eye on. he wouldn't be really subtle about it, just text her "whats on your wishlist right now" LOLLL... he just appreciates nina's presence (after they get over the jeff situation) and likes having a little sister to spoil. he'd probably send jane a bouquet of flowers with a thank you note, since jane did a lot for him. if he had a partner, it would also be very stereotypical. date plans, picking them up, flowers, etc. he'd LOOOOVE to make one of those big baskets filled to the brim with random shit. would wanna come home and draw a nice bubble bath and have some wine. stuff like that in general...

ben, lulu, ann, and dina wouldnt do anything and wouldnt get a partner. lazari would draw some pictures for her friends! sally will draw something for jane and mary

[oc-tournaments]

ROUND FIVE - THE FINAL MATCH.

THE HERO vs SALVANAN vs TAMARA

THE HERO: @technoria

SALVANAN: @the-demoness-next-door

TAMARA: @wokeuptraveledstraightintothesun

VOTE BASED ON THE INFORMATION BELOW CUT!!

Propaganda Content Warnings: Abuse, manipulation, suicidal thoughts for SALVANAN, abandonment, experimenting, cult mentions for TAMARA.

THE HERO:

PROPAGANDA: while their story is still a work in progress the main important detail about them is that they are so fucking doomed to fail their one main goal no matter how close they get to success and this is driving them absolutely batshit. video game protagonist that lost the job of player character to some mass produced level 1 enemy. not once have i drawn them happy

THEME SONG:

SALVANAN:

PROPAGANDA: this poor man. buckle in, you have a LONG one coming. he's very old, he's the god of plants + the earth and he's great i love him but man i have not been nice to him. so. way early in his life, he had a very sweet boyfriend named azyll along w lots of mutual friends. except oops, sal developed chronic anxiety and depression and decided that he did not think he would be good for azyll and broke it off w him. it was amicable but it still sucks. fast forward a bit, one of the friends in their circle, jekath, is being manipulated and hurt for no reason and sal knows but for magic reasons he's incapable of telling anyone, just has to watch. and then he eventually has to watch jekath finally snap under the pressure and betray them all and go evil. no bueno. so he spends a long time feeling terrible and eventually he plans to just. yknow. off himself. but oh surprise this little boy named safari shows up in his garden! and he's like well shit guess im a dad now. and he loves this little boy very much. it's good times! except when he's a teenager two of the little boy's biological brothers drop him off a cliff and nearly kill him, which is, yknow, terrifying. that's his son! his son was almost murdered! no! bueno! anyway, azyll's mortal so eventually he dies of old age, now sal's even sadder. least he's still got his other friends and safari but Man. anyway fast forward again, whole world is at war. and his two best friends, arona and morana, both die in it. but if that was not bad enough, arona was killed by jekath. you know, the old friend that was abused and eventually betrayed them all. so the friend he felt like he failed has now murdered one of his best friends. and his other best friend is ALSO dead. things are just going Great. flash forward another little while and his goddaughter's husband, sibrum, goes evil against his will too. he's known sibrum since he was a kid so now he's got ANOTHER person he felt responsible for gone evil against their will. then sibrum's daughter dies. are you seeing a pattern yet. anyway, sibrum soon kills jekath so now sal feels like he's double failed both of them and also even MORE of his original friends are dead now. so he is trying So Hard to relax! but then safari is turned into a terrible person against his will too! and because they were so so close for so so long they end up in a toxic dynamic instead of cutting each other off. sal finally figures out how to break the spell on safari and it's all Okay Now (they're both traumatized and it's definitely not okay). he gets to relax for only a brief time before his other child's son, volta, has a villain arc too. and what happens? you guessed it! sal tries to stop him and help him and he's not able to. and feels like he failed someone AGAIN. yeah this just happens over and over through the course of his life. he's so tired and sad man

THEME SONG:

TAMARA:

PROPAGANDA: let’s see, lost her family at 7 years old (none of them died there was just a house fire where she was put inside an iron stove to “protect” her by her father (her father doesn’t like her can you tell) and they left her there (the rest of her family thought she’d left already)), (un)fortunately picked up by a guy who took her to a very ethical lab where she was healed! And then forced through many painful experiments. Also she was the executioner for a Lot of people later in the lab time and she’s not even 16 yet. So she escapes at age 16 and spends a year with her girlfriend just existing and processing (poorly) what she had to live through and trying to acclimate to life outside of The Lab. Then her girlfriend (who is a cyborg fun fact) got a virus and so she had to be decommissioned which was not a good time for Tamara.

Other physical details: One of the experiments was a test in how high someone’s empathy can get and. Tamara’s the highest Kyne (the one guy who loves experimenting on her) got. So she’s having a Time. She has lost sensation in her extremities, her bones are weak as Fuck due to being part bird (because of very little bone marrow and airy bones), and she just always looks soggy regardless. Also she’s trans

So she just can Not catch a break and she unfortunately gets exploited by her need for parental love and general guidance in her life and joins a cult :( Like can you see the fact that she just cannot stop being kicked while she is down. (I love her to bits and she is my favorite oc I promise)

THEME SONG: