#it was fun trying to make an argument that *actually* would have constituted a debate instead of the 2 sentences you get in game

[letsplayballet]

making this its own post bc a) i've done the next scene finally, and b) maybe if it gets notes this time i'll be able to convince myself to write more of this thing that's been living in my head for 5 years now

anyway. persona 5 tv studio/justice rank 1 be upon ye.

~*~

The instant Akechi enters the studio, the unsettled feeling Akira had had in the hallway the day before returns full force.

“Ain’t that the guy from yesterday?” Ryuji mutters- for once quiet enough to not garner attention, though that could easily be because everyone around them is too busy cheering. Akira gives a shallow nod. He’s not even sure if Ryuji notices, or if he was actually asking him in the first place, but he can’t take his eyes off of Akechi for long enough to check. There’s something in the back of his mind screaming danger!, like they’re in a palace and the teen smiling pleasantly on stage is a shadow, about to round a corner and sound the alarm on them.

It doesn’t make sense, he can’t help but think as the show goes live. He doesn’t know Akechi, had only heard his name a few times in passing before yesterday, and nothing Akira has heard or seen has given him any reason to be this suspicious of him. For all that he works with the police, he seems nice enough, if a little awkward; kind of in a similar way to Yusuke, actually, with those weird comments on pancakes in their last conversation-

(that uncomfortable tension rises, sharpens, why does it feel like he’s missing something)

-but on the whole he seems… genuine. Startlingly so, actually. Akira has lived and breathed masks for a while now: he’s had several of them himself, and has learned how to recognize them in others, a talent which has only gotten stronger since this whole business with personas and the metaverse. He can nearly see the seams on the hosts as they chat with Akechi, the bubbly entertainer personalities of their jobs overlaying who they actually are, and they’re professionals. Their livelihoods depend on these masks, on their ability to make them seem genuine, and they’re good enough that Akira is sure that, even if other people know the masks are there, no one else can see them the way he can.

Akechi says something, giving a wry little grin, that sets the audience laughing, and Akira can’t see any hint of a mask.

It’s possible he doesn’t have one, of course. But- he’s a celebrity, and in high school, and people in either of those situations don’t tend to last long without some sort of protection between them and the outside world, at least not with decent mental health, and Akira can’t see his mask-

“However, if these Phantom Thieves are real, I believe they should be tried in a court of law.”

Akira’s circling thoughts come screeching to a halt. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Ryuji and Ann both tense.

“That’s quite the statement,” the male host says seriously, his raised eyebrows the only sign of his surprise. “Are they committing crimes? Some people even say that the Thieves are actually helping their victims abandon their evil ways.”

Akira feels Ryuji bristle at Madarame and Kamoshida being called victims, and he presses his own knee against his friend’s thigh. I know, he tries to tell him with the contact, but now’s not the time. Some of it must come through, because Ryuji huffs out a breath and sits back in his chair, tense and glaring but less ready to jump into a fight.

On stage, Akechi frowns. “What the artist Madarame did was truly an unforgivable crime,” he says, just the barest hint of something severe in his voice. “However, the Phantom Thieves are taking the law into their own hands by judging him. It is far from justice.”

There’s a murmur through the crowd, and Akira looks over to find Ann already looking back at him, seeming as conflicted as he feels. It’s one thing to talk these sorts of concerns over with your teammates; to hear them repeated in this sort of a setting…

“More importantly,” Akechi continues, drawing the team’s attention back to him, “we have no idea how they are causing these supposed ‘changes of heart’, but I would highly doubt it’s the result of a friendly conversation. Blackmail would be the least concerning option, and that is a crime, regardless of intention.”

“You have a point,” the male host says. “These people are calling themselves the Phantom Thieves, after all.”

Which isn’t really wrong either, especially for people who can’t conceive of the metaverse. There probably isn’t an explanation even close to the truth that they could give that would be believed, much less not construed as some sort of crime.

“Now then,” the female host says brightly, “lets try asking some students the same age as Akechi-kun about the Phantom Thieves! First, please press your buttons now if you believe the Phantom Thieves exist!”

Ryuji presses his button immediately, and with quite a bit more force than necessary. Akira hesitates, but also presses his own button. A few seconds pass, and the flashing numbers reveal that about a third of the audience has also pressed their buttons, which is a much higher percentage than Mishima’s site shows.

(Akira can’t help but wonder if it’s just the age range of the audience, or the fact that many of the students here have now witnessed two of these incidents, where the rest of the world has really only seen the one.)

“That’s a bit higher than I was expecting,” Akechi says, unknowingly mimicking Akira’s own thoughts. “I’d love to hear some more detailed opinions on the Phantom Thieves’ actions.”

The female host stands, scanning the audience as she walks towards them- and then comes to a stop in front of Akira.

Ryuji, who hasn’t relaxed since the start of the interview, somehow manages to tense even further. Ann takes in a quick, startled breath through her nose. Akira can feel everyone’s eyes on him through his panic, and he tries to school his face into pleased excitement, like being on TV was the best he could have hoped for today and he’s just trying to make the most of his spotlight.

“Why don’t we ask this student here?” the host asks, cheerful. She’s just a little too loud this close to him, and he hopes that his discomfort isn’t as obvious as it feels. “Hypothetically speaking, what are your thoughts on these Phantom Thieves, if they are real?”

There’s an anticipatory note to the silence now, and Akira is reminded again of the feeling of infiltrating a palace, though this time he can’t tell where the danger lurks. He clears his throat.

“If they are real, I think what they’ve done is quite noble.”

“Oh really?” Akechi says, cutting off the host before she can even begin to reply. The attention on him feels like a physical weight now. “How so?”

Akira shrugs, trying to seem unaffected. “Well, you said yourself that what Madarame did was unforgivable. It seems as though he hurt a great many people, but no one has been able to come forward until he confessed to his crimes himself. His reputation protected him for a long time, but he can’t hurt anyone else anymore. I can’t see how that’s anything other than a good thing.”

He’s being reckless, he knows, even without Morgana’s claws digging into his ankle through his bag. But between Akechi’s unsettling demeanor he still can’t figure out, the tension he can feel thrumming through his friends, the considering murmurs he can hear in the crowd, and his own persona in the back of his mind, he can’t quite convince himself that it’s a bad decision. Even if it puts undue attention on him, if he can redirect the focus onto the good the Phantom Thieves have done, maybe this show won’t be the utter disaster it’s starting to feel like.

“I must say I agree with you in that much,” Akechi says, sounding faintly surprised- though whether it’s at Akira’s words or his own agreement with them, it’s hard to tell. “But what of their methods? Do they not concern you?”

“What methods?” Akira challenges. “For all we know, these ‘Thieves’ are nothing more than fictional boogeymen, created to try to scare a terrible man. Can you say with certainty that Madarame hasn’t carried a guilty conscience all these years, and this is just what pushed him over the edge?”

Akechi leans forward, elbow on his knees, and the look he’s leveling at Akira is both considering and… something else. Excited, maybe?

“Not with complete certainty, no,” Akechi allows. “But it seems highly irrational that one would commit crimes of such magnitude for such an extended length of time if one carried any guilt over the matter.”

“I would argue that it seems highly irrational to commit such crimes in the first place, regardless of the perpetrators personal feelings.”

“I suppose it depends on your working definition of ‘rational’, but that could be a whole other argument, and I believe we’ve gotten far enough off topic. I’ll ask again, more clearly: if we are supposing the Phantom Thieves are real, that there is a person or group of people who have somehow convinced a previously unrepentant criminal to willingly turn himself in, does the method of this convincing not worry you at all? During the whole of his interrogation, Madarame has claimed no knowledge of or interaction with these Thieves outside of the calling card posted at his exhibit. If someone close to you- for example, your friend next to you- suddenly had a complete change in personality, what would you think? How much could the Phantom Thieves change him, without anyone knowing for sure how or why?”

Akira pauses for a moment, mind racing, not at all liking where this questioning is going. He tilts his head at Ryuji, considering, until-

He blinks at Akechi up on the stage, twists his face into a confused frown, and (promising he’ll apologize to Ryuji as soon as he gets the chance) asks, “Would the Phantom Thieves make him study for his exams?”

“Dude!” Ryuji says, loud and betrayed. Ann bursts into giggles. The laughter spreads through the audience, and Akira is painfully grateful that no one else seems to notice Ryuji’s white-knuckled grip on his chair, or how incredibly forced and fake Ann’s laughter is.

Akechi, after a second, also starts to laugh. “Alright, maybe that was a bad example,” he says, and he has the same even and easy-going tone he’s had the whole show, but for a split second Akira sees- something. A crack, just the barest hint of something other than a calm and collected teen detective.

Interesting.

“My point, however, remains,” Akechi continues as the host returns to the stage, slip already smoothed over. “Whether the Thieves’ actions are good or not, the fact that they could hold this much sway over a formerly unrepentant criminal could have alarming implications, even if we trust them to only be pursuing people like Madarame. Should they decide this isn’t enough… the existence of the Phantom Thieves would be nothing but a threat to our everyday lives.”

~*~

Ryuji, thankfully, accepts his apology with an easy grin and a “Pay for the ramen next time and we’ll call it even.” They spend the rest of the recording a bit more relaxed, bickering quietly during breaks about what sorts of food qualify as “sorry for throwing you under the bus” material. (Ann argues that ramen is insufficient, but eventually concedes to Akira’s point that it kind of depends on the bus.)

After another hour or so, they’re free to go. Ann rushes out pretty quick, having a shoot on the other side of the city she doesn’t want to be late for, and Ryuji has to run to the batroom, so Akira has tucked himself into a corner to wait and is checking his phone when he hears, “Oh! There you are!”

Akechi approaches him confidently, seeming not to notice the stares and whispers that follow him all the way to Akira’s corner. Or, no; he seems very aware of them, but not like he especially cares, in a casual sort of way that does nothing to ease the alarm going down Akira’s spine.

“Detective,” Akira greets. There’s a bit of a tease in his tone, too familiar for someone he’s spoken to twice, but Akechi barely reacts.

“Oh, please, Akechi is perfectly sufficient. Anyway, I’m glad I caught you; I wanted to thank you in person.”

Akira can feel his eyebrows rise, and this time the confusion isn’t affected at all. “Thank me?”

(He wishes he had the comforting weight of his dagger in his hand. He wonders when that weight became comforting, as opposed to strange and vaguely alarming.)

Akechi smiles, distant and professional. “To paraphrase Hegel, advancement cannot occur without both thesis and antithesis.”

One of Akira’s eyebrows drops. The other remains arched slightly above the rim of his glasses, unimpressed. Akechi’s vague smile shifts into a more rueful grin.

“Sorry. What I mean is that our discussion today was quite meaningful. Few people around me are so willing to speak their minds as freely as you did earlier. It frequently makes for dull conversation; it’s been some time since I felt as though I had to work to keep up with someone, especially in the context of a debate.”

“I appreciate the compliment, though I’m not sure it’s entirely deserved,” Akira says slowly. “I’m glad you got something out of it though, and not just the station.”

“Nervous about your television debut?”

“Weren’t you?”

“Not quite,” Akechi says with a laugh. “It’s hard to be nervous about reporters and entertainers when you’ve had to interrogate violent criminals. Regardless, you have nothing to worry about. You handled both yourself and the conversation quite well. If you hadn’t confirmed it just now, I wouldn’t have suspected this was new territory for you. You must be quite a fan of these Phantom Thieves, to defend them so eloquently.”

Morgana shifts suddenly in Akira’s bag, a warning he doesn’t really need. Akechi’s expression remains open and vaguely pleasant, giving no sign that he especially cares about what Akira has to say, but there’s a tension that wasn’t there before, that makes it clear that one wrong step will send him plummeting.

Well. Akechi did say he likes a challenge.

It just so happens, Akira is discovering, that he’s not the only one.

(He’s so gonna get an earful from Morgana for this.)

Akira gives a bit of a grimace. “I don’t know that I’d say ‘fan’, necessarily.”

There’s a beat of silence, and while Akechi’s expression changes very little, there’s definitely a note of surprise. “Oh really? What would you say then?”

“You have a point,” Akira begins slowly, “worrying about their methods. Assuming they’re real, it’s clear whatever they’re doing is effective. Having that much potential power, but no oversight into what they’re doing… well, it’s the same reason a lot of people don’t trust politicians, or police. I imagine the only reason the Phantom Thieves are being viewed positively by anyone is because of the results they’re achieving.”

“In contrast to politicians and police,” Akechi says dryly, with a bitter note that Akira wasn’t expecting. “So you think the ends justify the means?”

“Not at all,” Akira shoots back. “But aren’t these ends worth pursuing? Madarame’s arrest has improved so many lives, and from what I’ve seen online has encouraged people in similar situations to stand up for themselves, no Thieves required. Isn’t exposing injustices worthwhile, Detective?”

Akechi’s face grows serious at the slight. “No one should be above the law, regardless of results.”

“No one should be. But plenty of people already are, aren’t they? Madarame clearly was, until the law couldn’t look the other way anymore.”

“… You’re right,” Akechi says, stony expression softening. “Apologies, for losing my temper a bit there. This is just… something I have very strong feelings about.”

“No worries,” Akira says. “I did needle you. My point is, as glad I am for what these Phantom Thieves may have done, I don’t think we know enough about them to call myself a fan.”

Akechi gives a huff of a laugh. “We do have a bit of a habit of getting off topic, don’t we? Not that I’m complaining; it’s remarkably good stimulation. In fact… would you be willing to exchange contact information? You’ve been such a wonderful debate partner, I think it would do us both good to continue having these sorts of discussions.”

Claws dig into Akira’s back through his bag. And really, Morgana is right. Akira definitely should not give his information to the guy who’s trying to catch him and his friends.

“Absolutely,” Akira says with a grin.

As they exchange numbers and Akira feels the certainty of a confidante click into place within him, he can’t even regret it.

He walks away when Akechi does, though, moving just outside of the studio in the hopes of getting a little privacy so that Morgana can start chewing him out now instead of trying to do it on the train. He finds an empty spot in the hallway where Ryuji (hopefully) won’t miss him, then slides his bag under his arm and opens it.

“Listen,” he starts, “I know it’s risky to get too close to someone like him, but I really think we can-”

“Akira!”

He stops, shocked. Morgana, for all that he likes to hear his own voice, rarely interrupts. Looking down properly at him, Akira realizes that Morgana doesn’t look mad like he’d expected. Instead, he looks… scared.

“What? What’s wrong?”

He can hear Morgana’s tail lashing inside his bag. “I, I know we talked last night about how something seemed off, and I realized, while you were talking to him… I’m the only one of us that said the word ‘pancakes’ yesterday.”

Akira stares blankly at him for a few seconds, before the realization of what, exactly, that implies hits him like a well placed zionga.

“… Fuck.”

[fishklok]

Happy Friday.

I needed to study for my torts class, and what better motivation is there than spite? Unfortunately, I did block this anon so they will be spared from my lecture lol. This is for me now.

Let's get some disclaimers out of the way.

The point of my post was not "Magnus would be found innocent because Nathan hurt his lil face :(". For one, I am talking about civil law, and innocent/guilty is criminal law terminology (a lot of self defense law is carried over from criminal law, but that's a different matter). The point of my post was whether, Magnus could use his own injuries to argue against Nathan's self defense claims. Magnus would still be liable for battery, but there is a chance he could have Nathan hit for a similar (perhaps lesser) claim. I thought I was clear in my original post, but there's a chance I wasn't and I'm sorry.

I'm just using scenes from the show to exercise my law student brain. It's really just a fun exercise trying to work through events and ask "well, how could this point be argued?" or "what if x happened instead?" I'm not a lawyer and I'm definitely not giving legal advice. There is a chance that I'll learn something next week that will tear apart everything I'm about to write in this post. That's fine - I'm still learning.

You might be thinking that I'm wasting my time dwelling on this. To that I'd say, yeah. I know anon and I have nothing going on this Friday night, so I might as well spend it doing some fun legal research.

Anyway, let's get to these points.

"Nathan would be completely in his right to fill magnus with lead, let alone punch him for magnus' ATTEMPTED MURDER."

Anon is actually right here. Let's assume that when Magnus went to stab Nathan, and Nathan responded by pulling out a gun and shot him, many courts would find this is sufficient to count as self defense. For Nathan to be justified in using deadly force against Magnus, he would have to prove that he had "reasonable apprehension of loss of life or great bodily harm." Scales v. State (1961). Then the court would have to argue over what constitutes as "reasonable apprehension", but it's likely that most courts would find Magnus literally attacking him with a knife to be more than enough.

"At what point does assault with a deadly weapon not justify a person's right to respond in equal if not excessive force to protect their own life?"

This is actually a very interesting question that's at the root of a lot of cases. Here's an example of a disagreement that comes up frequently within the law: what if someone is able to retreat? If someone could have fled the scene, but instead chose to defend themselves with deadly force, can they still claim self defense? The Restatement (Second) of Torts § 65 (1965) says that a victim may use deadly force, only if there's reasonable doubt they could escape safely. However, most courts hold that someone can use deadly force to defend themselves, even if that force results in the death of their attacker. But this is a very complicated issue that you see pop up everywhere from courtrooms to high school debate club topics. But relevant for this spiral of a post, if Nathan killed Magnus to defend himself from being stabbed, it would be sufficient to count as self defense. Also Magnus would have a harder time arguing otherwise.

(Also, just to be even more of an asshole, for the sake of this hypothetical I'm considering Magnus' crime battery, not assault with a deadly weapon. It's still a serious tort, but I don't want to get too mixed up with criminal terms in this civil law example. Also I'm being pedantic.)

"There have been cases of people winning self defense when the attacker died using a less deadly weapon."

I don't doubt that; I've even read some of those cases. However, this is not the issue at hand.

My point was that, if Magnus was brought to court, he could make the argument that Nathan used excessive force against him. Not by punching him after the initial attack, but by repeatedly punching him when he no longer had the means to fight back. If the initial attack is no longer a threat, the privilege of self-defense is terminated. The cases my text book cites to illustrate this point are Germolous v. Sausser (1901), Drabek v. Sabley (1966), Edgar v. Emily (1982). There is a point in the series of events where the self-defense distinction becomes murkier, and Magnus could use that murkiness to his advantage. It could be argued that Magnus stopped committing the battery the moment he no longer had access to his weapon and he was prone on the ground. When it comes to proportionality of force used in self defense, courts often consider the differences in strength and age between the parties. So if Magnus wants to present himself in court as a weak old man getting punched in the face by this beefcake metal vocalist, it might be able to help his case.

So what does this mean for Magnus? Does this mean the court would find him innocent? No, because "innocent" is a criminal law term, and I just spent an eternity talking about torts. But in a civil case, Magnus would have grounds to argue against Nathan's self defense claims. Does this mean he would win? Unlikely. At most, I can see Nathan being considered liable for battery as well, not definitely not as severe as Magnus' claim. Nathan might have to pay him some damages, but it probably wouldn't even be enough to make up for the money Magnus would owe him. And at worst, the court would look at Magnus' argument and say, "yeah....but you did stab the guy, so no." It really depends on the jurisdiction and the nature of the arguments. But it is an argument that Magnus, this fictional cartoon man, could make. There is no guarantee he would win.

"You're going to make a horrible lawyer."

I don't know what kind of lawyer I'm going to be.

Anyway, lol. Lmao, even.

(I was able to seriously bulk up my tort law notes for today because of this, so I don't consider this a waste of time at all. It's a waste of everyone else's time lol).

[itsstillrealtomerpg]

Update!

Hello members! It’s been awhile since we’ve done an update on the main, so we hope you’re doing well! We’ve been noticing a trend of some confusion regarding kayfabe and the overall mission of this group and while we were initially confused by the lack of understanding, we realize that we haven’t actually said what constitutes as kayfabe and what doesn’t, nor have we accurately described our mission statement.

This group blends and blurs the lines between KAYFABE and REALITY.

What this means is that our muses will handle problems and situations according to not only their on-screen persona, but in a realistic manner as well. Some good examples of this would be the following:

The Bunny is close to Penelope Ford on and off television. She is also close to Mercedes Moné in RP. Recently Penelope and Mercedes got into an argument and because the mun has deemed them equally close to Bunny, she’s opted not to get in the middle of it. Just because somebody is friends on screen with another person does NOT mean that they are always going to agree with their actions or take their side, unless the mun deems it in their character to do so. In reality, friends don’t always get along and agree with each other. Even then, taking a neutral standpoint does not equate to picking sides.

With this being said, we are going to set some basic rules regarding kayfabe, including some banned words/references.

THE FOLLOWING WORDS/REFERENCES ARE BANNED IN REGARDS TO KAYFABE:

Scripts

“Protecting your opponent”

Character/persona

Fake

Writers/writing team

Anything implying that the match is “fixed” or predetermined

Work/shoot

Working “safe” or “stiff”

Storyline

These are non-negotiable and if you’re confused on them, feel free to message us and we’ll be happy to explain as to why references to these terms/phrases don’t make sense in kayfabe. However, we will not be having debates over this. If you’re caught using these terms or implications, that will count as a strike. Each member has 3 strikes as of this post, and with each strike we will message you with a warning and we will attempt to help you navigate these rules! But if hit with a 3rd strike, your roles will be released without warning—no exceptions.

It is important to note that we are here to HELP. Please don’t be afraid to reach out to the main if you’re confused or need help—we’d rather you message us than potentially get hit with a strike from a simple misunderstanding.

This also leads us into discussing another recent trend: fights!

We’re very happy to see muses interacting both positively and negatively, but we’ve gotten a little bit of confusion on the results of those fights. We understand nobody wants their muse to lose—however, the fights should typically be as even as possible unless one mun is completely open to having their muse lose the fight. Please also be mindful of current booking. Someone who is being booked as a strong fighter on TV is more than likely not going to get squashed by your muse and you not wanting them to lose is NOT a good excuse to be difficult or try to impose your will. Fights can be a blast, but only when both muns are on the same page. Work TOGETHER.

This brings us to our next point. COMMUNICATION IS KEY! If you’re confused by a detail of someone’s muse, ask them! Assuming and jumping to conclusions does nothing but stir up trouble and tension in the group and from this point on, that will no longer be tolerated. Nobody here is attempting to be in a cliqué or bully through their characters, but you do need to open and willing to have productive conversations if you’re confused by a muse’s actions.

Lastly, we’d like to reiterate that activity is important and jumping on every few days to post once or twice is unacceptable. We will give you guys warnings and even give hiatuses if you need them, but if we see the pattern continue we will have to release you.

Now that we’ve got that out the way, have a great rest of your day and have fun!

- ISRTM Admin Team

[buzzdixonwriter]

Hoo U?

A spirited discussion is raging on Facebook now, the good kind of spirited discussion, an enthusiastic exchange of ideas and ideals, not a snark fest.

The top is a deceptively simple one:  Who are the characters various actors played?

Let me clarify:   It began as a trivia challenge to name actors who have won Oscars for playing the same character.

And there in lays the debate.

How exactly are we defining a character.

This all sounds trivial, and to be frank this part of the discussion is, but it’s gonna get deep by the end.  

Trust me.

So here’s the kickoff:

Marlon Brando won a Best Male Performance Oscar for playing Vito Corleone in The Godfather; Robert DeNiro won a Best Male Supporting Performance Oscar for playing Vito Corleone in The Godfather II

Heath Ledger won a Best Male Supporting Performance Oscar for playing the Joker in The Dark Knight; Joaquin Phoenix won a Best Male Performance Oscar for playing the Joker in Joker.

(Trivia bonus: Kate Winslet and Gloria Stuart received Oscar nominations for playing the same character at different stages of her life in Titanic, and Winslet and Judi Dench were both nominated for playing the same character at different stages in Iris as well; plus Peter O’Toole was nominated twice for playing Henry II in Beckett and The Lion In Winter which technically counts as a sequel…)

The Facebook debate is over whether Ledger and Phoenix were actually playing the same character.

Now in the case of the former, The Godfather II is a continuation of the same story in The Godfather by the same creative team with much of the original cast reprising their roles, the Oscars going to two actors who played the same character at different stages of their life (BTW, where's the love for Oreste Baldini, who played Vito as a young boy?).

The two films were re-edited and combined with The Godfather III to make a nine-hour and 43-minute miniseries The Godfather Trilogy.

It is clear the creators’ intent from the beginning was for audiences to accept Baldini / DeNiro / Brando as the same person at various stages of his life.

The Ledger Joker and the Phoenix Joker cannot possibly be the same character for a wide variety of internal continuity issues separating the two films.  The creators of Joker went out of their way to state their version of the character was not The Dark Knight version.

Unlike The Godfather movies, you can’t link up the various live action Batman / Suicide Squad / Joker stories into a single coherent narrative (especially since you have to drag in the live action Supeman and Wonder Woman movies and TV shows as well).

. . .

Can different actors play their version of the same character in otherwise unlinked productions?

Of course they can.

Stage plays do it all the time.

If you start with the same exact text, then clearly any number of actors can play Hamlet or MacBeth or Willy Loman.

The problems arise when one goes afield of the text.

. . . 

In 1932 Constance Bennett made a movie called What Price Hollywood? that did okay but really didn’t set the world on fire.

In 1937 Janet Gaynor remade that film as A Star Is Born, the story changed to give it a tragic yet uplifting conclusion; her version was a big hit and Gaynor received an Oscar nomination.

In 1954 Judy Garland remade A Star is Born as a musical and that proved a big hit, and Garland received an Oscar nomination.

In 1976 Barbara Streisand took a swing at the material with a country-western version of A Star Is Born and while she got an Oscar nomination, audiences were unreceptive.

In 2018 Lady Gaga remade A Star Is Born and received both an Oscar nomination for her role and an Oscar win for her song.

Question: Are they all playing the same character?  Each played a character that started their film with a different name than the other versions, but the Gaynor / Garland / Streisand / Gaga versions all end with the central character proudly proclaiming they are “Mrs. Norman Maine.”

Same character?

. . .

There’s no argument that William Gillette, Basil Rathbone, and Benedict Cumberbatch all played Sherlock Holmes, even when their productions took certain liberties with the stories.

But Sherlock Holmes is not an idiot, and Michael Caine played Holmes as an idiot in Without A Clue.

Was he playing the same character as Gillette / Rathbone / Cumberbatch?

(Ironically Peter Cook played a very recognizable and wholly credible Holmes in his farcical send up of The Hound Of The Baskervilles with Dudley Moore.)

Did George C. Scott play Holmes in They Might Be Giants?  Almost everybody else in the story thinks he’s a New York banker who’s suffered a nervous breakdown and only thinks he’s Holmes, but Scott believes he is Holmes 100% and throughout the film other people he encounters accept him as Holmes at face values.

He functions as Holmes throughout.

And in the end, the audience is left in a weird place, not really knowing what his fate may be, not absolutely sure if he is a bonkers banker but maybe…somehow…he is Sherlock Holmes…

. . . 

Did John Cassavettes in Tempest and Walter Pidgeon in Forbidden Planet play the same character?  Were either of those roles Shakespeare’s Prospero?

Did Christopher Lee play the same character in Horror Of Dracula and its sequels, in Count Dracula, and in In Search Of Dracula?   (The producers of Count Dracula sure went to great pains to explain their version was a different and more accurate version than the Hammer version of the character, and In Search Of Dracula cast Lee as Vlad Tepes who was the real life historical figure Bram Stoker based his novel on.)

For that matter, is Count Orlok in Nosferatu:  A Symphony Of Terror actually Dracula?  A European court awarding lawsuit damages to Bram Stoker's widow sure thought so.

Along similar lines, was Bela Lugosi playing Dracula in Columbia's Return Of The Vampire? Universal's lawyers sure thought so.

Did Jim Caviezel in Passion Of The Christ, Max von Sydow in The Greatest Story Ever Told, Paul Newman in Cool Hand Luke, and Michael Rennie in The Day The Earth Stood Still all play the same character?

Did Toshiro Mifune, Clint Eastwood, and Bruce Willis all play the Continental Op?

Did Clint Eastwood play the same character in all three Dollar films?

Did Vincent Price, Charlton Heston, and Will Smith all play the same character?

Did Leonardo DiCaprio play the same character Steve McQueen played in The Great Escape (even if just for one brief scene) or did he play a character who played a character Steve McQueen played in The Great Escape?

Ooh, here's a good one!

Lon Chaney Jr starts Ghost Of Frankenstein playing the same monster Boris Karloff played in the original Frankenstein / Bride Of Frankenstein / Son Of Frankenstein trilogy, but by the end gets Ygor's brain (Bela Lugosi) transplanted into his body and speaks / thinks / acts briefly as Ygor in Frankie’s body.

However, Frankenstein Meets The Wolfman while maintaining continuity with all four previous films cast Lugosi as the monster (because Chaney had to play the Wolfman, duh) without dialog.  Glenn Strange then assumed the role again in continuity with all previous films for House Of Frankenstein, House Of Dracula, and Abbott & Costello Meet Frankenstein, occasionally speaking briefly in the role.

Who was Strange playing in his films?  The original Karloff monster or Ygor in Frankie's bod?  Are those two distinct characters?

. . .

All the above is fun trivia to debate, but it links to a much more serious question:  Who are you?

That’s not a trivial matter.  What constitutes out identity?  What makes us who we are?

I lost my father years ago to Alzheimer’s.  As my brother Robert observed, the only member of a family not affected by an Alzheimer’s diagnosis is the person suffering from it themselves.

I would talk to my father on the phone, and he was always pleasant and cheery, but about three years before he died I realized he had no idea who I was, I was just some voice on the other end of the line that mom wanted him to talk to.

My father was by nature and easy going kinda guy, and that certainly made his last few years easier for my mother and brother Rikk to cope with, but one night when I was visiting, trying to get their affairs straightened out so he could enter a nursing home, he got irritated with my mother as she was trying to help him and raised his hand as if to slap hers away.

My father never raised his hand against my mother.  

Ever.

He taught me and my brothers that was something no real man ever did.

He might sound gruff on occasion but he never raised a finger, much less truck our mother.

The fact he did so in the throes of Alzheimer’s indicated that whoever he once was, he wasn’t that person anymore.

We got him into a nursing home and he lasted a little less than a year there, his mind and his memory and his personality deteriorating rapidly.

Who was he at the end?

I didn’t go to his funeral.

What was the point?

The father I knew and loved had departed long before they buried his shell.

My grandmother, on the other hand, remained her cranky, irascible self until a week and a half before she died, finding the wit to crack one last memorable joke before her body began shutting down.

. . .

The question of identity is related to consciousness, and these are referred to as “the hard question” by physicians and physicists and philosophers alike.

What makes us “us”?

How do we know who we are?

What constitutes identity?

There are no easy, pat answers.

We have textbook definitions that dance around the issue of identity and consciousness, providing enough of a foundation for us to recognize what it is we’re discussing, but no one has yet come up with a clear, concise explanation of what either phenomenon is.

It’s like saying “apples are a red fruit.”

Okay, we know what you’re talking about, but we also know that description falls far, far short of what an apple actually is.

That’s why trivial discussion like whether or not Heath Ledger and Joaquin Phoenix are playing the same character is a lot more important than it seems.

(BTW, they aren’t. Phoenix won his Oscar for his version of the Rupert Pupkin character in a violent remake of The King Of Comedy.)

    © Buzz Dixon 

[arcticdementor]

I was talking to Sarah yesterday and I had a revelation I think is worth sharing.

Let’s begin at the beginning. About a month ago, Instapundit posted this.

Now, I’ve been thinking of the rise and fall of civilizations lately. I can’t think why it’s been on my mind. It’s a tale as old as time—a civilization emerges, establishes a new worthwhile order, the good things brought forth by said order soften up the people maintaining it, the softening turns to decadence, and the decadence gives way to the barbarians, who clean the slate. Where would you say things are lately?

…

In short—the federal government of the United States of America has become impotent at almost all good things.

Expanded out—There is no start to its talents. It cannot maintain its borders. Since the “election” it doesn’t even try. No surprise there. It cannot maintain friendly relationships with allies—as our recent screwing of Britain on our way out of Afghanistan shows. The “leader” of the “free world” could not be bothered to pick up the phone for our closest ally. Speaking of Afghanistan, it can’t win a war. It can’t even lose gracefully. In fact it fucked up leaving so badly some people are entertaining that it intended to fuck it up, because how the fuck does somebody above the age of six not notice that pulling the military out first and the civilians out second is not even a remotely workable strategy? Resulting in leaving millions of dollars of equipment—and—excuse me, what? Millions of dollars of dollars in the desert? Fantastic.

It makes self sabotaging and idiotic choices to stymie its own domestic oil industry, while accepting a pipeline not from Canada, but one that’s a joint Russian-German venture instead. Which means the problem, contrary to any environmentalist whining, isn’t the pipeline—it’s the pipeline with a friendly country. Big surprise— its only true interest in the environment lies in international agreements that hamstring us while doing nothing to China, the world’s largest polluter. It either can’t be trusted on energy production  and the environment, or is trying to get it wrong.

It can’t manage its economy. What could have been a “V” shaped recovery has been turned into an “L” shaped one. What could be contributing? Paying people to do nothing? Rampant inflation? Meanwhile all the dumbasses running the country can think of is spending several billion more dollars that don’t exist. The country has infrastructure problems for a fact, but they’ll only acknowledge that to the extent of cynically plastering the word on an “infrastructure” bill which is in fact just a far Left wishlist that largely ignores actual infrastructure, in the hopes people will be dumb enough to support it because it has the right label.

And on.

And on.

And on.

What aptitudes does it have besides taking money, trampling civil liberties, and ignoring constitutional laws at gunpoint? News flash, dummies: We don’t need peaceful protestors incarcerated without a trial. We don’t need the weight of the federal government turned to the problem of violating states rights because Texas passed a law Biden doesn’t like. We need military egresses that look like they weren’t planned by Bozo the clown and an economic plan better than something China would design for us as an attempt to permanently sink the country. Is there anyone at all in DC who can provide that? If not, is there anything useful they can do? I’ll wait.

…

This is what decadence looks like. When the government stops even attempting competence because nothing and nobody that currently exists can replace or displace them so who cares about results? When comfort and plenty have become so common, been taken for granted for so long, that the question of utility or even basic sanity isn’t even distantly considered. When it’s assumed that self-harming policies that will obviously damage the country won’t really matter because nobody has ever known a world without America and fundamentally has no idea how the present day came to be. When the country’s most educated start chasing bizarre and unimaginably stupid ideas on economics that boil down to “inflation won’t happen if you double the monetary supply by printing money, if only you just believe hard enough”. In fact, when education stops being a means to greater insight, more useful abilities, and a better life, and becomes a cult devoted to the kind of idiocy that can survive only with strenuous censorship, the tenets of the cult being treated by the indoctrinated as a collection of sacred mysteries and deeply-thought paradoxes— while to those not similarly trained it is self-obviously a collection of contradictory and self-serving lies.

Verily, decadence is here. We can infer that what comes next is the barbarians. And we have options. Mexican illegals? A heady mixture of poverty-stricken Marxists who have never known a system that wasn’t corrupt, functionally lawless, and devoted to the tenets of voting oneself rich; and outright criminals with lives like “a demon’s resumé”? Perhaps radical Muslims? By sheer numbers worldwide they’re the most likely option. The Taliban just got a huge infusion of cash and a big boost in morale. In a few short days we’ll know whether they’ve arranged a thank you gift for Zho Bi-Xen and his kleptocrat marching band to commemorate his intended pull-out date. But even if, and God I hope, they have not, we can expect an uptick in terrorism and quite shortly. Or perhaps China? The Middle Kingdom would laugh at being called barbarians, but I call genocidal communists like I see them. Mao was morally three steps below a pig and Xi has enough power to aspire to greater depths. As is I wouldn’t dream of feeding a pig Mu Shu Xi due to the great risk of poisoning the pig.

But there is a barbarian group not considered. Us.

Hang on. Before you balk, listen. Look again at what these idiots are selling as the fruits of civilization. Defenses of pedophilia and urinals as art. And more, too—sterilization and disfigurement of teenagers in the form of sex changes. Black supremacy as a panacea to made up threats of white supremacy. Books nobody reads, movies nobody watches, paintings that exist only to launder money—even the ones not made by Hunter Biden.

What good person would not be proud to be considered a barbarian by these miserable, over-decorated Faberge people? I’d be mortified if they agreed with me! So they think I’m a sexist or a racist or whatever. Fine. They do not use these words to mean the same things I mean, so it’s a pointless argument, and they are now officially beneath my explaining myself to them. When the people who are calling me names are so morally opaque that the Taliban can make devastating critiques of them just by referencing the foundational works of their own gender studies programs, I’m done caring about the names. Fine. I’m what you think is a racist. I’m what you think is a sexist. But you think a lot of very stupid things, and as the curtain continues to draw back on the carnival of madness that’s been behind the scenes the entire time it’s occurring to me that what you think and reality overlap so seldom that the only time not to ignore you is when I can ridicule you. If that is your civilization, someone hand me a pointy horned helmet.

…

Yes, this is a moment of peril, but also opportunity. See in your country what every hostile group listed above sees in it—the makings of great civilization, along other, less stupid lines. All of it guarded by weak, fat, stupid people with no will and no self-belief. Take that mindset and go forth.

Get involved in your local systems. There is an old prayer for God to make ones enemies ridiculous. Congratulations to whomever was still praying it. Your prayers have been answered. Will you tell me that you cannot defeat these people? People who lose casual debates to terrorists not on principle but on basic facts?

…

You can’t reason with them so don’t bother. Recent events have made it clear you may as well try to talk sense into a three-day-old mackerel. Just confront them with their own stupidity so that people who see the inevitable video understand what this is about, and don’t feel that you are too good to shout them out of the room. You’re the barbarian, remember? Not like the nice civilized people with their gender-queer Tik-Tokers pushing vaccine propaganda. That means you’re excused from conversations with morons. Don’t bother trying to find common ground. Look at where they’re standing! Do you want to try to find the midpoint between that and reality? Silly. Pointless. Send them back to their walled online gardens to whine to their equally stupid friends about the barbarians.

Can we take it back from the ground up? I don’t know. But hey, it’s got to be worth a shot. Join the fun! Find some friends and locate a low-hanging political event to raid. When was the last time you went to a town hall for your town? Isn’t just a part of you curious to know whether your local county commissioner starts by declaring her pronouns? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to see someone like that made very uncomfortable? You can make that happen. You can probably do it within the next month. Bring a few friends! Or a few dozen. Some of the people reading this probably were afraid to do that kind of thing for fear of losing their job. The Biden economy might have freed up some of your time. What have you got to lose now? More importantly, the way things are going, are you going to lose it anyway if things continue as they are? Think on it.

[seventeens-diamond]

Small Glances (OhmxFong)

This is my first ever fic so some feed back would be appreciated. I’m also taking in prompts if anyone is intrested. I was really inspired to write by @sarawatlovestine your work for Ohmfong is great :)

Summary: Ohm starts to realize that his feelings for Fong have changed over time. His solution? Avoid everyone 

*Also posted on ao3 

Ohm was in his dorm room laying down after a long day of school and homework. He didn’t know how he got here but he was reminiscing old memories. Ohm and Fong have been friends for as long as they can remember. They’ve been through so much with each other, practically glued to one another since they met. Although at first, it had been just the two of them, soon they met Tine and Phuak and their circle just kept growing since then. With Tine and Phuak getting into relationships and spending most of their time with their partners, Ohm and Fong have been spending more time with one another just like old times.

Recently though Ohm has noticed that he’s been longing for a relationship. Watching his friends be happy and having someone the other can rely on. Fun things like going on dates made him realize that he wanted that for himself. The only problem was that he didn’t really find anyone intriguing enough to ask out. Even if he did find someone intriguing it just wasn’t enough to spark a second date. The only thing that kept him sane was the fact that Fong hadn’t paired up with anyone yet, leaving him with a friend to hang out with instead of being a loner while all his other friends hung out with their partners.

Ohm, however, had been having some weird thoughts, specifically about his friend Fong. Now it wasn’t anything weird just out of place and confusing was all. If you asked him it was probably just the recent discovery that he did in fact want a relationship and Fong is someone who’s just always been there. It’s just that he’s started to notice small things about Fong like how cutely he dressed sometimes or how when he was reading something interesting he becomes so focused as if  nothing else mattered. It was also the way when someone needed advice or comfort it was like Fong always knew exactly what to say or do and it was something that was admirable, to say the least. Whomever Fong ends up dating they’ll sure be lucky. Wait, was Fong even looking for a relationship? Not that he cared or anything but maybe he should bring it up soon.

The next day at school he spots Fong sitting with Tine joking around. He doesn’t know exactly what gets into him but he doesn’t immediately go over to them. Ohm instead decides that he wants to observe them from afar, so he found a table where he figures that it wouldn’t be too obvious that he was there but that he still has a good view of their table. Seeing Fong happy and joking around somehow made him feel content. Even from afar Fong looked good, his soft features, the way his smile seemed to light up the table. These were normal thoughts, right? He was so concentrated on his observation that he didn’t notice the presence that had arrived before him.

“Ohm?”, a voice called out. “Hey Ohm!”

Startled, he looked up and saw none other than Pear. “Oh..um hi Pear, I didn’t notice you there” he managed to get out while trying to compose himself.

She giggled and replied “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you” as she sat down next to him. “In my defense though, I did call out to you but you seemed too lost in thought.”

Scratching the back of his head he replied a bit nervously “oh uh yea sorry about that.” After a few moments of silence, he cleared his throat and said “ I...I uhm didn’t have enough sleep that is all.”

If Pear noticed him acting strangely she said nothing and just simply replied “Okay.”

The atmosphere between the two was deafening. After a moment of debating what to say Pear asked “So what are you doing over here?”

Looking at her he answered dumbly and simply stated “Just waiting for my first class to start”

Chuckling she replied “ I meant over here alone instead of you know at that table with your friends”

“My friends? Oh, yea I didn’t notice that they arrived.” Ohm replied. Was he that obvious? He thought. Was she going to tell everyone that he was just staring at his friends like a creep?

Slightly picking up on his panic, Pear saw Earn from afar and immediately saw a way out. Wishing him goodbye and not bothering to wait for a reply she made her way over to her girlfriend.

Ohm finally snapping out of whatever trance he had been in decided that it was time to make his way over to his friends.

“Oh Ohm where have you been? It’s about time you got here” said Tine.

“I kind of missed my alarm and overslept,” he replied as he took a seat next to Fong. Not questioning him, his friends got back to their argument. Ohm didn’t trust himself to speak and sat quietly not saying a word. Fong however, looked over at Ohm questioningly because he wasn’t always this quiet.  

Nudging him slowly, Fong smiled and asked “ Are you okay? You look a little nervous.”

Nodding he stated, “ I just didn’t sleep well that’s all.” Apparently, that was enough that Fong didn’t question him further.

As the weeks passed and he was becoming busier with school, he decided that it was better to avoid Fong all together. See in his thought process he had no idea what to make of the feelings he was having for Fong. On the one hand, all of his feelings could just be his appreciation for his lifelong friend. On the other, these typical feelings would constitute what people would call a crush. But that’s impossible, right? He couldn’t be having these feelings for his friend no way. Nope! It’s just that Fong had to be so goddam great it was hard to deny anything.

Phuak however, noticed that Ohm wasn’t hanging out with them as much and wanted to get to the bottom of this. Whether or not his other friends were buying Ohms crappy excuses as to why he bails every time they try to hang out and catch up. He was determined to find out why Ohm has been so distant and if his friend was in need of company or comfort in this new solitary life he chose for himself. So Phuak being Phuak decided that going up to Ohm and asking for an answer was out of the question. He had to corner him somewhere that an escape was not an option.

He figured that Friday was a perfect opportunity to finally talk to Ohm. He called Tine and asked him to take notes for him with the pretense of being sick. His big plan was to ditch class and to break into Ohms dorm room when he went to class so that he would ensure Ohm talked to him.

Ohm was on his way to his dorm after class when he decided that he wanted some food. He stopped by this small coffee shop and got an iced coffee and a slice of cake. It wasn’t actual food but he was content with what he found because who doesn’t like sweets right! He waited for his order and then took it home.

Once Ohm got back to his dorm he sat on his chair and began to eat. Meanwhile, in his closet, a bored Phuak was relieved that Ohm finally came home and decided he wanted to have some fun. He quietly started a tapping noise and watched Ohm look around confused. Deciding he finally had enough of being stuck he counted to three and then “BOO!!” he screamed and ran out of the closet.

Ohm fell out of his chair obviously very startled. “Phuak what the actual fuck! How did you get in?”

“I picked the lock” Phuak simply replied as if it was just something he did on the daily.

He smiled at Ohm and proceeded to grab the cake on the desk waiting for Ohm to get over the shock.

“You know how to pick a lock?” was the only thing that Ohm could get out.

“Uh yes and no. I mean I was able to get in so technically I did pick it but it also took me like an hour so...yea” he said.

“Why are you here anyway? You know there are easier ways to get a hold of me,” said Ohm clearly annoyed.

“Well I would have but you know with this whole act of you avoiding your friends and all it’s kind of hard to talk to you,” said Phuak while taking a bit of the cake.

“I’m not avoiding you guys...I’ve been busy that’s all” he stated not very convincingly.

After a minute of staring at each other in silence, Phuak decides to speak up and say “So why are you avoiding me?”

“I’m not avoiding you”

“Yes you are”

“No, I’m not”

“Okay then, why are you avoiding Tine”

“I’m not avoiding Tine either”

“Hmmm..Fong then”

“For the last time, I’m not avoiding any of you!” yelled Ohm.

Phuak let out a long sigh but was determined to leave the dorm with information and he was getting to the bottom of this no matter what. “So you’re avoiding me”

“No”

“Tine?”

“No”

“Me?”

“No”

“Tine?”

“No”

“Fong!”

“What?”

“Ha! Got you!” said a gleaming and highly satisfied Phuak.

Cursing at himself for slipping up Ohm tried to come up with something to say but his mind was drawing blank and he couldn’t get a word out. So he just looked down at his hand not knowing what to say.

“Ohm, you know you can talk to me right? I may not be the most perceptive person but I can be here for you if you need me” said Phuak while gently getting up from where he was and sitting next to Ohm on the floor nudging him gently.

Scratching the back of his head, Ohm thought about how bad it would be to tell Phuak about his crush, but then again what’s the worst that could happen? Besides, disaster. After about a minute he mustered up the courage to speak “I…I um...well I don’t know what to say or where to start.”

“You don’t have to tell me anything you’re uncomfortable with just tell me what’s on your mind, tell me the truth” Phuak whispered quietly not wanting to startle or push Ohm into anything if he wasn’t ready.

“IthinkImaylikeFonganditscaresme” mumbled Ohm quickly and quietly.

“What?” Phuak chuckled “You can’t possibly want me to decipher that.”

“Shut up,” Ohm stated while playfully punching Phuak on the shoulder. They both laughed softly and fell into a comfortable silence.

After about a minute Ohm took a deep breath in and said “I think I may like Fong and it scares me...I don’t want to ruin our friendship but I also don’t think I can control my feelings.”

Oh wow, okay um whatever Phuak was expecting it was not this but Ohm looked so scared and vulnerable he really had to choose his words carefully. Ohm chose to confide in him, deciding that he would support his friend in any way possible.

“...Ohm, it’s okay to have a crush it’s not like you can control your feelings and Fong’s a great guy I can see why you like him.” he said, “Also being scared is perfectly normal and a valid feeling.”

Ohm spoke softly with a slight tremble in his voice, “You don’t think that it’s weird? I mean Fong is our friend and if I ever do decide to tell him our whole friendship dynamic would change.”

“Hey, listen to me no matter what happens we’ll always be friends. Plus how do you know he doesn’t like you back?”

“It’s highly unlikely.”

“You see if you say that then it will never happen. You, my friend, have to have some confidence.”

Both of them fell into silence but Ohm felt relieved that he finally let someone know and wasn’t keeping it all bottled in. Phuak was indeed a good friend and no matter what others saw he was actually someone you could confide in.

Ohm didn’t exactly return to their friend group immediately. It actually took him a few days to compose and gather his thoughts. He had a huge fear of accidentally letting something out and ruining everything. Surprisingly Phuak didn’t mention anything to him about hanging out all together. Ohm figured that he understood his predicament and he didn’t push anything. Phuak did check in on him and they got dinner together a few times.

Ohm himself was quite a social person and he was missing joking around with his friends. Tine and Phuak were chaotic together but Fong always seemed to keep them level headed. It was tiring distancing himself so he decided to finally join his friends the next morning before class.

When he arrived the next day Phuak, Tine, and Fong were already there. Putting on his brightest smile he walked over to their table and sat down. The table however went silent and everyone was staring at him. He looked at them questioningly and said “What? Do I have something on my face?”

“You’re unbelievable!” Tine shouted. “After weeks of ignoring us, we suddenly exist again. All you gave us was shitty excuses and suddenly it’s like nothing happened.”

Ohm looked down at his hands sheepishly and felt a bit guilty. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea he thought. Fortunately for him, Phuak saved him by saying “Come on guys give him a break. We all have things we deal with alone. What's important is that Ohm came back to us.”

“Is everything okay?” Fong’s soft voice came out and he was looking at Ohm with worry.  

Ohm felt his face heat up a little and his heart rate sped up. It’s been a while since he’d been near Fong and he had so many feelings rushing through him. Someone cleared their throat and he realized that he had been staring at Fong without an answer.

Awkwardly he replied “Yea I am” and gave Fong a small smile to reassure him.

“I’m sorry for snapping earlier. You know you can come to us for anything right?” said Tine feeling a bit guilty for not noticing that his friend was clearly going through something.

While they were heading to class Fong gently grabbed onto Ohm’s wrist and signaled for him to stay back. They stared at each other for a moment before Fong spoke. “Hey, do you want to grab lunch with me later? We haven’t really seen each other in a while.”

“I’d like that,” said Ohm smiling. They walked to class together in silence but somehow that didn’t make Ohm panic. He was just happy that Fong wasn’t mad or ignoring him for his absence in the past few weeks. No matter what he was determined to keep their friendship alive. When they arrived at the classroom and took their seats Phuak looked at him and wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Time could not go any slower for Ohm. He was very excited and anxious about his date...wait no not his date, lunch just lunch. No date whatsoever. When class was finally dismissed he said bye to Tine and Phuak and waited for Fong to pack up. Both of them walked out and kind of wandered aimlessly.

“Hey, Fong?”

“Yea?”

“It’s nice to be able to hang out again. I really missed this,” Ohm said shyly.

Bumping shoulders with Ohm and gently smiling at him Fong said “Me too. I missed you.”

Looking away, his cheeks growing red Ohm missed the way Fong also had a slight blush on his cheeks. They decided to stop by a small cafe and just caught up on what’s been going on in their lives. Unbeknown to the other they each stole small glances at each other. Everything finally felt okay.

A month or so later their lives fell into place. Ohm and Fong were closer than ever. Whatever time they didn’t spend with their other friends they spent with each other. Ohm however was wondering to himself if there was a chance a relationship between the two could work. So he did the only thing he could think of and enlisted the help of Phuak, he would have told Tine but he was so bad at keeping a straight face.

Ohm texted Phuak to meet him after class back at his dorm. An hour and a half later he heard a knock on his door and got up to let Phuak enter.

Phuak looked at him and smiled. “What’s up?” he asked Ohm.

“Oh well, I umm...I’ve decided that I want to take a leap of faith with Fong. We’ve been hanging out more and more since you are always with your girlfriend and Tine with Sarawat.”

Without warning, Phuak jumped, embracing  him and screamed his congratulations. “OH MY GOD FINALLY!!” Letting go of Ohm and looking at him he said “You know if you weren’t going to do something soon I was going to meddle.”

Chuckling Ohm looked at his friend with a certain amount of fondness and said “ I need your help to do something that won’t completely overwhelm Fong.”

Soon Phuak was coming up with many ideas like getting a girlfriend and making him jealous, making a big sign that read ‘Fong please be my boyfriend’, and throwing a party and confessing to him there. Ohm’s not going to lie all of these ideas were pretty crappy except for the last one it just needed some work. After a bit more time planning they decided that they will all go out for drinks and bring their significant others so that only Ohm and Fong would be left alone so they could talk and celebrate later. They settled on Friday night and sent an invite to everyone in their friend group.

It was now Friday afternoon and Ohm was incredibly nervous. He tried on so many different outfits and settled with a nice button-up black shirt with a few buttons open and a nice pair of jeans. He decided to style up his hair a bit, enough that it would look good but also wouldn’t look as if he was trying too hard. He put on a small necklace and some cologne and decided that this was as good as it was going to get.

He was actually one of the last ones to arrive and took a seat in between Fong and Pear. He greeted everyone and Tine bought them all drinks to celebrate Ohm no longer avoiding them. Everyone was so happy and talking with each other it was hard for him to start up a conversation with Fong. He got himself another drink needing the courage that it would bring him. Looking over at Phuak seeing that he was too busy talking to his girlfriend he panicked and thought he wouldn’t be able to get a moment alone with Fong tonight.

To his surprise Earn got up and said that everyone should dance because that’s what they were here for. To have fun and enjoy each other’s company. Everyone looked at her and seemed to accept this as they paired up and headed to the dance floor. Smiling gently at Ohm as she took Pear’s hand to lead her to the dance floor but not before turning around and whispering  “Good luck.”

Saying that he was puzzled was a hell of an understatement but it also finally gave him the opening he had been looking for. Finally taking a good look at Fong for the first time he was blown away by how handsome and cute the boy next to him was. Leaning over her whispered in Fong’s ear “Want to get out of here?”

Fong titled his head slightly, looked at him questioningly and back at his friends on the dance floor before answering yes and getting up. Once they were out of the bar Fong cleared his throat and asked “So where are we going?”

“There’s a park nearby, want to go walk around or sit down? It’s a beautiful night unless you have somewhere you want to go?”

“Let’s go to the park.”

“Okay.”

As they made their way over to the park they walked pretty close to each other that their hands brushed against each other. If either of them noticed they didn’t dare to say it out loud. They found a bench and sat down. For a couple of minutes no one said a word enjoying the night and each other’s presence.

Ohm looked over at Fong and Finally decided to speak. “Fong?”

Fong looked over at him and replied with a hum. Taking a deep breath in and taking Fong’s hands in his own, he whispered “I like you Fong, like as in more than a friend.”

Silence.

Fong took a minute to wrap his head around the words that he had just heard. Was he hearing this right? Does Ohm like him??

Mistaking his silence as a reply Ohm started to stammer out a sorry and pulled away. Before he could get away completely Fong grabbed onto his wrist and slid his hand down to Ohms. He looked Ohm in the eyes and smiled. “I like you too, you idiot.”

Ohm was not expecting this. He was ready for rejection but it’s not what he got. He searched Fong’s eyes for any signs that this was all a big joke but he was met with nothing but sincerity and a soft smile. His heart was beating fast and he was sure his face was the shade of a tomato. Ohm had no idea how he managed to move but the next thing he knew he was leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to Fongs lips.

He pulled back and rested his forehead on Fongs and just smiled. “I’m really happy, can I kiss you again?”

Not giving a response Fong just closed the distance between them. The kiss was soft and just perfect. This truly was like a dream come true.

[jaywrites101]

Why You Should be Voting Democrat: The Republicans are Hypocrites Against God.

This is an essay I now have to give to a person living in this house with me. Some context, they pinned a piece of Republican propaganda they received in the mail to the community posterboard with the words “why I vote Republican” written on it. I have interpreted this as an invitation to challenge their beliefs. And my response is in the essay below.

Sincerely, By Everyone in This House

Pro-life vs Pro-Choice

This argument is a messy one to argue, this is something our country is literally divided over this and each argument is so twisted it's hard for either side to understand one another. For this to be the hill you've chosen to fight on I'm going to have to assume two things—1: you believe abortions are murder, and 2: You believe abortions are a common occurrence made by lazy people who want to get rid of the consequences of their bad actions.

Both of these are common arguments made by the Republican party to defund Planned Parenthood. So it may surprise you that not a single person on the Left is trying to disprove your fighting points.

That's because this isn't about abortions at all. It's about women's rights. Abortions only play into this because it was the item that forced the issue before the courts and the public.

In 1973, Roe v. Wade was a landmark decision of the U.S. Supreme Court in which the Court ruled that the Constitution of the United States protects a pregnant woman's liberty to choose to have an abortion without excessive government restriction. This decision effectively guaranteed that a woman had the right to treat her body as her own property, meaning she could choose what she eats, who she has sex with, and, yes, whether or not to carry a pregnancy to term.

The decision ruled that the US Government has no right to decide the moral outcome of a single person's choices. Nor do they have the right to force a person to live in what they currently believe to be an ethical lifestyle.

This is the one and ONLY law in our country that explicitly gives women the same rights to life, responsibility, and authority that a man has. It also the only law that ensures a woman has the ultimate right to refuse to have sex with a man.

Republicans want to overturn Roe v. Wade and defund Planned Parenthood (not end abortions). They often cite the evils of abortions as the reasons why they want to overturn it. However, this is not their real motivation. Planned Parenthood has a multitude of other services for women and men besides abortions. They help people conceive children, provide safe-sex alternatives to reckless teens, provide both erectile stimulants and contraception, and even hormone therapy for trans people transitioning genders. They also provide pregnancy care for women just like any other hospital.

And as we've discussed Roe v. Wade is about a woman's rights to her body.

Republicans are trying to keep women from having equal rights. This much has been stated by Republicans in the 1970s and that mentality continues to today. It's blatant hypocrisy from a group of people who've only read the Bible enough to make real Christians like yourself believe they're doing God's work. And they are not shy about signaling how religious they are. God even has a Bible verse for them specifically:

 “Therefore, when you do a charitable deed, do not sound a trumpet before you as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory from men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward.” Matthew 6:2. (NKJV)

Government Spending

This one's actually a very easy argument to refute. Republicans are always talking about making tax cuts and spending less money. In truth, all the money they save goes straight into the military budget which increases by BILLIONS of dollars each year. We're currently spending $934 billion a year on our military budget. According to the last Discretionary Spending Audit under Obama, more than half of that goes back into the politicians in both the House and the Senat across both sides of the aisles. That's also why this issue is one many Democrats actively support; the military is giving them a kickback.

The tax cuts you experience is not the government saving an extra twenty cents by cutting out beef from their cafeteria and passing the savings to you. It's the Republican party throwing the US into more debt to artificially give you a tax break so you'll continue to vote for them, and force the Democrats to be the ones to have to put that back to normal so they look like the bad guys.

Long story short, if you want the government to save money, vote Democrat, pay higher taxes and demand a drastic decrease in military spending.

Fun Fact: If we succeed in cutting the military budget by one-hundredth of a percent, the excess funds would pay to empower EVERY SOCIAL SERVICE the democrats suggest (from healthcare all the way to free electricity.) for the next ten years.

Education (Really? This one's so backward you should know better without me explaining.)

Republicans have been so far on the wrong side of this debate I'm surprised I have to tell it to you. For decades they've cut school budget both in the public and private sectors. They happily cut millions of dollars a year from the federal grants that are supposed to help kids afford college, while also artificially inflating the price of school, school supplies, and class prices.

This is not some secret thing you'll have to search hard for. They brag about it on tv every other episode of Fox News. 

The document you gave me lists education but provides no real proposals or examples of problems they hope to change, it is preying on your ignorance in this situation to make themselves look good. (What follows was not any part of the document they left, but are bullet points I thought they should be thinking about when they go to vote.)

Gay Rights

People who are gay, or otherwise not cishet WASPS should have the right to live a life of their own choosing without persecution or judgment from us. Jesus says everyone has that right amongst man. We're supposed to leave all that to God, so leave it for God.

Racism

I direct you to the current protests as proof that Racism is a thing that still exists, and has only gotten more unmanageable as time has moved on. Also, every Black Lives Matter protest since Martin Luther King Jr.

Socialism

Roads, parks, schools, and social security are all social programs funded by the government for the people. We on the Left wish to expand these capacities to healthcare, electricity, internet, higher education, and phone services, while also insisting that the government provide the minimum funding needed for people to live. (This in a time when the cost of living keeps rising higher due to unchecked capitalism.) We demand the government provide for the homeless, and regulate the supply chain of food. (because over 70% of all food in the garbage across this country is thrown away while it's still fresh.)

We have the ability to end starvation, and homelessness in this country. We argue this means we have the responsibility to do so as well.

Gun Reform

Democrats believe no civilian needs access to weapons of war. It's too easy to exploit these weapons and it results in mass killings of innocents. There are far better and more effective ways to defend yourself and your family than buying a bunch of guns and shooting anything that makes a noise in the night.

Police Reform

This is the current agenda. Police have gone unpunished for their crimes against civilians, (especially civilians of color,) and our current system 1: Encourages police to kill first, ask questions never, 2: Forces cops to take on roles they are untrained for, and 3: Gives them too much power without any reliable method of accountability. We demand all three of these things be addressed and changed in a meaningful way.

All of this without even mentioning Trump, the man actively trying to be a dictator.

[devianta]

MDZS/Persona 5 xover that literally no one asked for

I just feel like there’s so much potential for this. Think about it, both of these works have themes surrounding the damage gossip can cause, getting punished for doing the right thing (no good deed goes unpunished), what constitutes justice, and the consequences of shitty parenting, amongst other things. 

Mostly I just want to run wwx’s palace. He has a palace, there’s no doubt about that, and I want to run it. I’d kill 500 men for the opportunity. Also, pretty sure his treasure would be his lost golden core. Meaning, that if you successfully steal that shit you get to give to it him and then he’d have a new one without 1) him having to die and be brought back in a new body or 2) having to fuck anyone else up. (Phantom Thievery ftw!) You’d just have to successfully complete the palace. That’s all. 

Can you imagine wwx as a boss? Like, can you imagine that boss fight? He’d have at least 12 health bars. I mean, this is the guy who got shot by an arrow, pulled it out, and threw it back, instantly killing the bitch who shot him. This is the fucker who got disemboweled by his brother, stuffed his intestines back in, and then went and bought potatoes. This guy got a super experimental operation done on him, got stabbed with his own sword by wen chao (at least in the donghua, can’t remember if this happened in the other adaptations), and was then thrown into burial mounds. Like after all that, he was literally thrown off a cliff and he was still able to move around. Wwx is not unlike a termite: there’s really not much that can kill him. During the Sunshot Campaign he managed whole battlefields on his own. He played the flute days and nights on end without rest. 

His boss fight would be near impossible but I would be so willing to try. BTW, I’m imagining this taking place after he’s moved into Burial Mounds with the Wen Remnants but before jzx gets dead. You know, before everything gets irreversibly fucked. So the Stygian Tiger Seal will definitely feature in the boss fight. Most likely it’ll be something you need to steal it during the fight. I’m imagining that he uses to summon endless waves of corpses that prevent you from getting any hits in so you have to distract him in order to steal the seal off him and finally be able to deal actual damage to him. That’ll be stage one of the fight. Stage two will be fighting wwx and shadow wen ning. You have to defeat wen ning before you move on to stage three. Wen ning exclusively uses physical attacks. Wwx never uses physical attacks. He mostly commands wen ning but throws out curse and almighty attacks every one or two turns. Stage three is just wwx and he starts hitting you with a crap ton of curse damage with some almighty mixed in to spice things up. He repels most physical attacks and all curse moves. He’s weak to bless skills but has a 50% dodge rate for them. Beating wwx earns you no money (b/c he’s poor af) but he drops 2x Shijie’s soup (restores full sp to all party members), 5x wen qing’s needles (cures any status condition), 5x curse talismans (does 50 dmg), and one (1) golden core. 

What does wwx’s palace look like? Where is it? I want to say Lotus Pier and the distortion (what he thinks of it as) is a graveyard/mausoleum/something along those lines. But an argument could be made for burial mounds. I’m not sure what the distortion would be though in that case. I feel like wwx sees burial mounds pretty clearly. No, I think wwx’s distortion revolves around Lotus Pier and his family there. Mini bosses? Jiang Cheng definitely. Maybe Madame Yu? Shijie would show up (his palace wouldn’t be complete without her) but she wouldn’t be a shadow you’d fight. She’d offer guidance or healing items. Lwj’s shadow would definitely be there but I’m not sure what his role would be. At that point in the story, wwx’s unknowingly in love with lwj and sees him as a nice guy who asks wwx questions he can’t answer. He believes that he and lwj will inevitably end up on opposite sides of the battle field but ultimately wwx does not want to fight him. He feels that a death at lwj’s hands would be a good death. So he might be a shadow you have to impress or prove yourself to before receiving help. I feel like wwx’s palace would be a bit like Futaba’s in that he wouldn’t have full control over it because he no longer has complete control over himself or his demonic cultivation. Which is why I think there would be shadows in wwx’s palace that act counter to his purpose of pushing others away (not unlike in Futaba’s palace). If anything, I feel like his palace would be like a weird mix of Futaba’s and Nijima’s palaces. Because wwx has that distinct self-blaming loneliness that so permeated Futaba’s pyramid but he also has that single-minded determination and overbearing hubris that featured so strongly is Nijima’s casino. I don’t know. Nijima, in her boss battle, repeatedly yelled “I must win! I must win at any cost!” and I can kinda hear wwx saying something similar but it would be more along the lines of “I must protect them! I must protect them no matter what!” “Them” of course being his family and the Wen Remnants. 

 Other palaces to conquer in the MDZS universe? (It might be easier to list the people who wouldn’t have palaces.) 

Jiang Cheng definitely has a palace. A very purple palace. Lotus Pier, the Revenge. But what does he see his home as? An empty house? Jyl did say in the Untamed that three of them must remain together forever. And what happened? Wwx ran off with the last of the Wens and Jyl got married and left. If anything, jc is lonely. All he wants is his family back. So his palace would either reflect the state of his existence: alone in an empty home with no one to call his own, or it would reflect his deepest desires: his whole family returned to him. What sort of palace ruler would he be? He has that inferiority complex and brother and mother and father issues. (So. Many. ISSUES.) I can see his wwx shadow being completely obedient, because that’s sort of what he wants. He wants his brother home again and fulfilling his promise, to be the other half of the twin heroes of Yunmeng. It might be fun to fight shadow!jc and shadow!wwx at the same time. The Phantom Thieves vs the Twin Heroes of Yunmeng, loser gets sent to the Shadow Realm! (Just kidding. Unless...?) The other possibility is that wwx is completely absent from the palace but his absence is blatantly obvious to anyone that gazes upon the palace, like walking into a bedroom with no bed. There should be a bed there. Everyone knows a bed belongs here but there is no bed. Jc’s palace should have a wwx but wwx is not here. But he should be.

What would jc’s treasure be? His original golden core? Probably not. As far as he’s concerned (at this juncture) the golden core in his body is his original, restored by baoshan sanren. So it’s not that. The puppies that he lost as a boy, that he was forced to trade for an errant brother? A possibility. That was seemingly the start of jc’s problems. First he lost his beloved dogs, then he lost the love of his parents. Jfm focused on wwx to the detriment of jc and madame yu wouldn’t shut the fuck up about how jc couldn’t compare to wwx. If wwx hadn’t come to lotus pier, jc’s parents might’ve been satisfied with him. But I sincerely doubt that. There were clearly problems between J-fucking-M and Mad-Yu’s (can you tell that I think nothing of these two assholes god what I wouldn’t give to kick their asses in the metaverse I’d tear their fucking hearts out to quote ryugi) marriage prior to wwx’s arrival. Wwx’s presence there only brought those problems to the surface. Whether jc is capable of recognizing that truth is another matter. (Sorry, jc but your parents are shit and their marriage was doomed to failure before they even made their bows.) 

Or would wwx himself be the treasure? Jc’s parents are dead; they can’t be returned to life and therefore are unattainable. Jyl didn’t necessarily abandon jc and I doubt he sees her leaving as a betrayal. Jyl’s marriage was more or less inevitable. She’s able to easily visit. There’s no real conflict there. Wwx, on the hand, defected from Jiang sect. Jc has to pretend to loathe him, to not want him back when the opposite is in fact the case. Most of jc’s problems, wishes, and desires center around this one person. It wouldn’t be inaccurate to say that wwx is the locus of jc’s world, the axis upon which all turns: the triumphs and failures, tragedies and victories. When wwx is missing, jc looks for him. When wwx drops his sword, jc picks it up and returns it to him. Whatever happens to one brother affects the other. Even if/when wwx isn’t obviously present in jc’s life, he’s still there, even if you don’t see one brother next to the other. Even though jc doesn’t know it at that point in the story, wwx is the core of jc’s body and, therefore, it would make thematic sense for him to the be the core of jc’s palace.

Other palaces? Well, Jin Guangshan and Jin Guangyao obviously. Su She is debatable. I feel like he’d be a Mementos run. Besides, he’s not important enough to warrant a palace. Likewise, Jin Zixun would be a Mementos case. Wen Ruohan would have a palace but we don’t get to really know him as a character so I can’t say what his palace would like look except that it would encompass the whole of Ancient China. Wen Chao would likely have a palace even though he doesn’t deserve the attention ripping his palace apart would require. Most likely it would be a cross between Kamoshida’s and Kanoshiro’s. Jgs’ palace would probably look like Kamoshida’s and Jgy’s would probably be like Shido’s. 

Am I missing anyone? What do you think the characters’ palaces would look like? Whose palace would you most like to run? Let me know! 

[tessatechaitea]

Justice Society of America #8

Oh no! Hate! It must be stopped!

That caption sounded sarcastic, didn't it? It sort of sounds like a centrist arguing against somebody saying something that nobody should be on the other side of. "Of course Black Lives Matter! Nobody is saying they don't! Why even bother bringing it up?! You're just causing trouble!" is the kind of thing that has made me hate people who identify as "non-political" or "centrist" or "libertarian" or "Proud Husband. Father. Christian." Nobody needs to hear from you if the only thing you have to say is that nobody needs to be fighting for the things they need to be fighting for! "If it's already a crime, why do we need more stringent laws for punishing crimes motivated by hate. Aren't all criminal acts hateful?" says the person ignoring reality for their own selfish interests of which I can't even begin to guess. Enough about people who have chosen to be non-people. Let's discuss a comic book from 1993 that probably takes a stronger stance against fascism than a frightening large number of Americans today.

This advert on the inside front cover would be better if the picture over "very rare" was a cow. I mean, it wouldn't work for baseball cards but I would like it better.

I think the best part about actually living in a world where superheroes are real is that day in 5th Grade when Hawkman and Hawkwoman visit your class to talk about Egyptian archaeology. The issue begins by catching up with Hawkman and Hawkwoman as they continue their quest to steal Egyptian cultural artifacts. You have to give them a pass on this though! In 1993, people just believed archaeology was a thrilling way to bring treasures into museums for everybody to share! It's not like we had hundreds of years to reflect on how terrible this practice was. You have to do some cultural math by subtracting the number of years Western culture believed whatever it did was right and just from, I don't, negative 100? Do you think we'll have learned some humbleness and respect in one hundred years? Most kids who grew up in the 70s wanted to be boring ass truck drivers but by the 80s, thanks to Indiana Jones, they wanted to be boring ass archaeologists. Kids aren't the greatest at determining what a fun adult job might be. Did you know there are people who get angry at the supposition that digging up and taking cultural artifacts and treasures from other countries to bring back to your own might be theft? Generally they're the same type of people who believe that all advances to civilization were brought about by white culture. They hold this opinion through absolutely no evidence at all. How do I know they don't have any evidence? Because if they looked for evidence, they'd wind up reading history and realize their claim was too ludicrous to continue defending.

You might think Hawkgirl is commenting on the gigantic sarcophagus the native archaeologists are opening but I know she's making an innuendo about Hawkman's cock because she's doing that thing with her hat where she lifts it up and down and waggles her eyebrows.

It's not really much of a joke though because nobody expects Hawkman's penis to be as large as a fifty foot long sarcophagus. I mean, I'm sure it's big but it's not going to be unwieldy! It's probably almost exactly the same size and shape as his mace. Interlude: here are some Facebook posts I made on several different July 26thes because I guess I think of it as a holiday to entertain my future self every July 26th? Whatever the case, I love Past Me more than Future Me and possibly even more than Present Me. Because of the Hays Code, Alfred Fatcock had to change his name to keep making films. How patriotic would you consider a person who got a flag pregnant? War Games is my favorite movie because it taught me that trying is pointless. The first item on my bucket list is to buy a bucket. End of Interlude. Can you tell I'm stalling because maybe eight issues of this comic book was too much? Here's an adult riddle: What's twenty-five feet long, wrapped in bandages, and has an eye in the middle of its head?

This guy's penis!

I don't recognize the guy with three eyes but I'm sure he's some immortal wizard named Amn Thoth or something. While the Carters discover ancient mummy curses, Johnny Quick tries to convince Rex that his hour of strength doesn't come from a drug at all but deep inside him. He doesn't need to pop pills to be a superhero; he just needs to balance his chakras and figure out his mantra. Then he'll tap into some deep spiritual part of himself that is probably just a meta(l)gene and whammo! Hourman is back and straight edge! But Rex doesn't buy it. Especially since learning his mantra isn't going to cure his son's cancer (which he got from taking Miraclo). Also in the hospital is Wesley Dodd who is doing therapy to recover from his stroke. Plus his friend Bishop Tumutuu who was some guy who fought against Apartheid. And because the Bishop is in the hospital, the white supremacists are gathering outside to not wish him well.

Shouldn't they hear what they have to say and debate them to better strengthen their own side of the argument on why all people should have equal opportunity with all rights and freedoms promised by this country?

I'm absolutely for freedom of all speech. But the problem that the American media and a lot of people on the Internet have fallen into is the idea that all speech needs to be discussed and debated equally. That's the whole "freedom of speech" trap. Whenever somebody on Twitter wants to debate some terrible topic that nearly all kind and forward thinking people realize is a monstrous and terrible idea and you simply mock them for their terrible beliefs or tell them to shut up, they think you're clamping down on their free speech. No, sir. You were able to say the stupid thing you wanted to say. What you actually want is for a Constitutional Amendment that forces me tor respect what you said and debate it as if the matter has yet to be resolved. The media does this all the time by allowing both sides of an opinion to debate which only legitimizes the side with the terrible take. Sure, we should allow racists to go on CNN and declare their stance on race relations. But the people on the other side shouldn't be debating that topic with them. They should just laugh at them and point and tell them how terrible they are. Maybe get some of that slime from You Can't Do That on Television for rebuttals. Freedom of speech needs way more mockery and far less debate if it's going to recover. Hourman responds to the white supremacists with a "None of my business!" because he's a terrible centrist who believes that if the status quo isn't making his life rough, why rock the boat? Also his son is dying of cancer so maybe he's a bit distracted. I shouldn't be so hard on him when he's wracked with the guilt of probably killing his son with his drugs. The white supremacists begin making trouble so it's time for the JSA to put an end to hate! Or will hate win out? I mean, this comic book was written in 1993 and I don't feel like hate has backed down.

Sure, he's against metahumans now. But just wait until one of them decides to wear on of those stupid hats and silly robes!

Watching the speedsters begin to get pummeled by the huge mass of white supremacists, Hourman accidentally balances his chakras! He's suddenly powerful without the drugs or the black lights or the Doctor Fate deep muscle massages! Now if he can convince his son that the power of Miraclo has been inside him all along, his son will have the strength to battle the cancer! Why did I use an exclamation point on that previous sentence when I don't really fucking care about Rex Tyler and his son! Hourman crashes out of the hospital window to save Johnny Quick. He lets Jesse do her own thing because he's heard about women's lib and also she's not an old man whose powers have significantly dwindled over time.

My adrenal gland just got bigger too!

In the end, the Bishop is saved and even Wesley Dodd joins the fight! Or he just absentmindedly shot off his sandman gun and coincidentally put the Bishop's assassin to sleep. It's hard to tell since he's still suffering from his retirement party stroke. The issue ends with Green Lantern surfing the television when he comes upon Carter Hall's interview program where he's interviewing the mummy they dug up, a man named Edmund Kulak. Since Green Lantern recognizes him, I guess he's one of the JSA's foes. According to the Who's Who, Kulak can use his third eye to cause everybody on Earth to hate each other. I guess that's why the white supremacists were acting up (and also wearing eyes on their hats and robes). Having a magical reason for racism is always a better comic book story than acknowledging a lot of people are racist of their own free will. Imagine all the angry letters that the pre-Comicsgate generation would have had to write in! "I'm not racist but I don't think you should portray all white people as racist because that is racist! Logic for the win!" That might seem like I created a 1993 Strawman but have you read the letters reacting to the Tales of the Teen Titans Spotlight on Starfire about Apartheid? My pretend letter was practically verbatim of one or two of the letters Mike Gold had to respond to on that series! Justice Society of America #8 Rating: B-. I think I've read enough old stories about old people fighting immortals. The whole mortality angle is really bringing me down!

[hillnerd]

Why do you think Ron and Hermione fell in love with each other?

I think there are a ton of different reasons. (stole a ton of this from debates I’ve had) THIS IS LOOOONG

1-They enjoy spending time with one another

From the moment they become friends (after the troll incident) they are joined at the hips. Harry goes off on his own a lot (what with Quidditch practice and games, detentions, not allowed to go to hogsmeade, private lessons, dates) and every time he comes back, there are Ron and Hermione still hanging out.

Ron gets on very well with Dean Seamus and Neville. If he didn’t like Hermione, why would he spend all his free time with her? Hermione has made it clear she’d rather have no friends at all than bad ones (otherwise she’d have hung out with SOMEONE when she was on the outs with the boys)- and yet she chooses to spend all her free time with Ron. So we have them choosing to spend their time with one another, whether Harry is there or not.

They are in sync and enjoy one another’s company

The two of them not only spend time with one another, but they see eye to eye on most things. They’re known for squabbling- but as far as actual disagreements go they don’t have that many in the series. The two are a great team who work as a unit to support Harry, Hagrid, defend others, defend each other, and as early as PS/SS even have funny naturally flowing back and forths.

Harry told the other two about Snape’s sudden, sinister desire to be a Quidditch referee.

“Don’t play,” said Hermione at once.

“Say you’re ill,” said Ron.

“Pretend to break your leg,” Hermione suggested.

“Really break your leg,” said Ron.

But they straight up enjoy the company of one another. They are seen laughing throughout the series, ‘having the time of their lives’ in Hogsmeade (just the two of them), hanging out in the library, happily hanging out in the common room.

 Ron makes Hermione smile/laugh more than anyone else

Ron is one of the only people in the series that can bring a smile to Hermione’s face- and it’s so important in any relationship, romantic or platonic, that you’re able to do that. Hermione is a rather serious character and rarely laughs. She barely laughs at the twins at all- but Ron? She laughs, smirks, smiles and finds real enjoyment from his wisecracks. He’s the only character able to get in there and help her have some real fun in the series.

2) They have the same values and admire one another 

Honesty, loyalty, fighting for what’s right, valuing the same sorts of people, enjoying spending their downtime (When there’s no ‘activity’) the same way, the commitment they each have to helping the ‘little guy’, valuing intellectual stimulation (not just academically, but through wit, analysis, and people watching), shared ideas of what’s important in life, and the ability to tease/take the mickey with one another. They are both down to earth people who value the simple things in life above everything else, and their loved ones mean more to them than anything.

They admire each other’s compassion

In the 7th book in particular we see how Ron’s compassion for the cattermoles makes her look like she might kiss him- and then his compassion for house elves is what makes her actually jump him and snog him right in the middle of a battle.

But the two of them admire one another’s good heart throughout the series. He thinks she the best person he knows (says it so as well). Ron is more frequent in verbally praising Hermione than the opposite- so we have a lot of examples of him praising her character.

Both have equal disdain for artifice, cowardly actions, hypocrisy, and cruelty- They also see eye to eye on just what constitutes each of those traits the majority of the time.

You see throughout the series that Ron admires (and does NOT ONCE SHOW JEALOUSY OF) Hermione’s abilities. He compliments her on them in every single book. Hermione is also pushing Ron to live up to his potential (Which she thinks is large- because- hint hint- IT IS) and gushes over how brilliant he is towards the end of book 7.

3) They enjoy mentally stimulating one another

In the series Hermione is constantly trying to get people the engage with her when she wants to argue, or learn. People are happy to inform her of things, but most people shut her down immediately when she starts arguing. Ron is the only character who consistently will engage with her when she does this. He’s the only person who will go head to head with her when her ideas aren’t sound. When she’s going off about SPEW and is trying to FORCE the elves into freedom against their will by hiding socks/hats she knit, Ron is the only person to engage with her about this and question it.

And she LOVES arguing/discussing things. She does so with so many people throughout the series. She argues at the drop of a hat- To her it’s not arguing though- to her it’s just dicussing/qestioning/getting to the truth of the matter- but it drives most characters away- not Ron.

Hermione also does this for Ron. He’s nowhere near as argumentative as Hermione- but he also loves to sit down and discuss stuff- and frankly he’s been so overlooked for so long- it’s wonderful he’s found Harry and Hermione- two people who readily want his opinion, want his input, and enjoy discussing things with him.

Ron and Hermione are both people who crave mental stimulation- and give it to one another throughout the series. It’s not just about arguing- it’s about engaging with her. Most people won’t listen to her and talk about topics with her because she bulldozes others. He is not bulldozed and will engage. Instead of Hermione speaking into a void, or foisting opinions on an unwilling audience- she has Ron there. He is offering her companionship. She obviously LIKES this companionship- even before their friendship she relentlessly pursued him and Harry to ‘help them’ and ‘correct them.’ She is a willing participant in this- and with Ron finally has an audience for all her thoughts. She seeks him out. At first he did not want HER companionship- but they bonded and he changed his stance.

He’s not just a silent audience- he participates- sometimes he’s agreeing with her. Sometimes he’s debating with her. Sometimes he’s laughing as she gets outraged and stamps her foot. But he’s there with her- Hermione chose Ron and Harry as friends. Her choice speaks very loudly. She could choose to never speak to Ron and only be friends with Harry. When she was icing out Ron in DH for a bit she did just that! But throughout the books she engages with him and visa versa.

4) They are fiercely protective of each other and have a bond/trust there that few could compete with

I mean, this is something througout the series- they are always willing to make sacrifices and help each other out- facing things they might not for anyone else.

Ron is the only person to see to Hermione’s needs most of the time. He is the only one to push in third year to learn why she’s disappearing so often. He is the only one to volunteer to help with Buckbeak’s petition. He is the only one worried about her dating some dude they never met who is legally an adult (yes a lot of it is jealousy- but I’m shocked he was the only one to be like ‘Um, no one else finds this problematic???’) 

He’s making sure she eats properly, defending her left and right (got tons of detentions from Snape for all his defense of Hermione, faced his worst fear for her (spiders in the woods with broken wand), slugs with Draco etc) When Hermione is crying over her parents, it’s Ron who immediately is by her side with a handkerchief holding her as she cries (same at Dumbledore’s funeral.) When Hermione is tortured, it’s Ron who carries her body away from their and gets her the medical care she needs (and who offered to take her place before the torture began.) Hermione is able to emotionally lean on him throughout the series and does- and Hermione looks out for Ron in this same way (though not to the same extent.)

When he’s being tortured with ‘Weasley is our King’ she is kissing him to distract him, when he’s hurt by his brothers she is standing up for him and helping him out (Percy’s letters, the twins being mean about his prefect status), they are entwined at Dumbledore’s funeral, and she’s holding him when he mourns Fred.

They intrinsically know how to be there for one another.

5) They are attracted to one another

This we don’t get as much insight on, as the two are so repressed it’s ridiculous- but the two of them obviously are attracted- they’re always vying for the attention of the other- are plagued by jealousy- and Ron even tells Hermione she looks great. The two blush at compliments and just are attracted.

6) They have a passionate reparte they can’t find with anyone else- where they complete the picture for each other

Each bring something different to the table- but they

Hermione offers her intelligence, hardworking nature, and drive

Ron offers cleverness, strategy, companionship, self-sacrificing, and loyal

They both offer honesty, passion, kindness, loving natures and companionship.

The two of them bicker- but we see in the books they are SHOCKED when people see them as ‘fighting’- as seen in OotP and Harry yells at them for fighting and look highly offended at being cut off and chastised like this.

The two of them keep each other honest, and have personalities that make a rumble everywhere they go. People like to think the two of them bring out bad qualities in the other- acting as if Hermione is a quiet sage intellectual who maturely goes about life until Ron comes into the picture. No. Hermione is unsubtle, pushy, abrasive, argues with a lamppost, and condescending. She’s also incredibly smart, passionate, and kind. She’s an emotional train-wreck a lot of the time who doesn’t have much in the way of interpersonal skills- she’s either quiet and kowtowing to authority figures, or pushing at people.

Ron on the other hand is not some chill dude until Hermione comes along. He’s passionate, always ready to throw down, is brash, and calls out anyone on their bullshit within a square mile. He’s also sensitive, loving, and self sacrificing.

The two are lions through and through with everyone- and that includes one another- but they work so well together because they enjoy passionately tearing into subjects, passionately loving one another, and taking on everything from monsters to parenting Harry. :P

Few people could deal with Hermione’s fiery nature- which again seems to be ignored in much analysis. People like to project and think of her as some lofty intellectual who is all cool logic, forgiveness, and objective. No. Hermione has never been that. Read the books and you can see how she is ruled by passion over her intellect.

I think people criticizing Romione a lot see relationships as something that should be all about shared interests, objective discourse, and perhaps some level of attraction. How very ‘Spock’…

They personally read arguments with any emotion/passion/loudness as negative. As a Latina, I gotta say- LOL. My poor poor husband. He comes from a very uptight white family where everyone is quiet and never expresses an emotion much at all. Like that John Mulaney bit- ‘I will keep all my emotions right here [points to chest] and then someday I’ll die.’ So the first time we had a debate and I was loud he was SHOOK. Now he knows- oh, wait, she’s loud all the time- like any time she’s passionate about a topic she’s loud. Ok! It’s like the ‘My Big Fat Greek Wedding’ family. They just loud.

That’s how Ron is (and all his family are!) and that’s how Hermione is.

They genuinely like one another (as shown time and time again how they smile at each other’s actions, value the other’s opinions, admire one another’s actions) love one another (as shown by how VERY much they go to pieces when the other is in danger/hurt, how Ron even said it in the books) and bring out something good in each other.

Ron is coded with female traits, while Hermione is coded with male traits in the series- he’s the emotional caretaker (making tea, feeding people, putting pjs on an injured harry, allying the group with emotional enthusiasm), while Hermione is the brain (helps with exposition, spellwork, gives answers to solutions and riddles.) Together they are the perfect team.

The two of them are awkward humans at times, and they are able to make it work. Hermione is able to look past Ron’s flaws and deeply admire him, while keeping him honest and really bringing out his intellectual side that he’d probably neglect left to his own devices. He is able to look past Hermione’s interpersonal flaws and deeply admires her, is able to make her see other sides to equations she doesn’t think about, and brings out the fun side of Hermione she would DEFINITELY neglect without his presence.

Dating for Ron is hard due a bit to social awkwardness, but it mostly comes down to his insecurity due to his familial upbringing (That was continually reinforced at hogwarts- the message of ‘you’re not good enough,’ ‘you don’t matter.’)

Despite some differences and disagreements, Ron and Hermione understand one another. The respect they have for one another goes very deep (though I think Hermione has some growing to do in this department when it comes to verbal validations.)

You see throughout the series that Ron admires (and does NOT ONCE SHOW JEALOUSY OF) Hermione’s abilities. He compliments her on them in every single book. Hermione is also pushing Ron to live up to his potential (Which she think is large- because- hint hint- IT IS) and gushes over how brilliant he is towards the end of book 7.

Relationships aren’t supposed to be easy, but as far as Romione goes- their relationship IS easy the majority of the time. The upsets they have as teenagers are silly and fun for a plot and overblown, as are most of the interpersonal dramas in a fictional kids adventure book. Objectively, they have so much good and little bad- subjectively- they have passion and love.

Ron is one of the most multifaceted characters in the book. He’s not just passion/emotion/loyalty- he also has an incredible strategic mind, is instinctively brilliant with magic (always picks up on magical stuff the other two don’t like the taboo, or his ‘predictions’ about stuff that always come true, or how he broke gamp’s laws when he made a mushroom.) In some ways Ron is entirely confident in WHO HE IS, and refuses to bend or change for anyone- and in other ways he’s completely insecure and certain that he is hated. He’s brave, but anxious. He can be rude, but he also will fiercely protect. He wears his emotions on his sleeves, but never verbalizes his insecurities. He’s the fun guy- but also the one who will literally let himself get killed so you can survive. Like, Ron is such a great interesting multifaceted character. Just the sort of interesting, provoking individual to never let the ever passionate Hermione get bored with. She could never get bored with someone with so many different modes. She can sit and analyze situations with him for hours, but she can also laugh with him as they explore shops for hours. They are adaptable together.

[aridara]

Strict Gun Control: common “objections”.

“Strict gun control is useless.”

False. Strict gun control reduces mass shootings, shootings in general, suicides, and deadly accidents. Unrestricted guns don’t make you safer.

“Mass shootings are statistically insignificant. Therefore, it’s not a problem.”

We’re talking about ALL the issues caused by the lack of strict gun control. This means: mass shootings, shootings in general, deadly accidents, suicides, etc.

If the number of deaths caused by trucks is NOT “statistically insignificant” (trucks are heavily regulated, after all), then the number of deaths caused by guns is NOT “statistically insignificant”, given that the two are pretty similar.

“But this other country has strict gun control, and more violent crime/suicides than the USA! Therefore, strict gun control doesn’t work.”

Hold on for a second. Wide-spread poverty and political instability both increase violent crime. Wide-spread poverty and high social pressures (see: Japan) both increase suicide rates. This is well known; don’t even try to deny it.

When you say stuff like what you just said, you’re implying that the only factor that caused those high violent crime/suicide rates is gun control; you completely omit the role poverty, political instability, social pressures etc. played.

And that’s bullshit. So I’m just gonna ignore it. You don’t like it? Then compare countries with similar economic situations, but different levels of gun control.

"But those countries have a population that's much smaller than the USA!"

...And? That's a problem how, exactly?

“But Chicago...”

Chicago is right next to two states with VERY weak gun control laws.

You can’t say “Well, we applied strict gun control, and it didn’t work”, when you didn’t apply it to begin with.

“Most mass shootings happen in gun-free zones.”

False. Only 10% of mass shootings happen in gun-free zones.

However, that study only works if the definition of “gun-free zone” we’re using is something around the lines of “an area where civilians aren’t allowed to carry firearms”. If you use a much wider definition, you could say “90%-ish of mass shootings happen in gun-free zones” - but that would be cheating, wouldn’t it?

“Guns don’t kill people. People kill people.”

And people with easy access to guns have a much easier time killing others, compared to people without easy access to guns.

“The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”

You aren’t John Wayne and you don’t have lighting-fast reflexes and magic bullets that steer in mid-air. The “good guy with a gun” myth is just that: a myth.

“Guns don’t make people kill themselves.”

That’s true. But they make it much easier for a suicidal person to actually succeed in killing themselves.

Meanwhile, a suicidal person who doesn’t have easy access to guns will:

Try a different method (like pill overdose) that is less immediately lethal. Therefore, they will have a higher chance of survival.

Try searching for another method. Which means they’ll take longer. Which means that there’s a higher chance they will be stopped.

Give up. Yes, sometimes finding an obstacle makes suicidal people stop their suicide attempt.

“But your solution won’t stop mass shootings from happening!”

It will significantly reduce them.

Also, laws against drunk driving haven’t stopped drunk driving from happening; they significantly reduced it. Are you saying that we should repeal the laws against drunk driving? What about laws on literally every crime ever?

“You want to ban guns!”

No. Next question.

“But implementing strict gun control means that the police can just barge in your house without a warrant and confiscate everything you own!”

No, it doesn’t. Not even Australia did that - and they still managed to get rid of a bajillion illegal guns.

“You don’t trust cops because of police brutality, and yet you trust them to take away our guns?”

Fun fact: I can fight against police brutality and against motherfuckers getting easy access to assault weapons, at the same time.

“If we have strict gun control, only criminals will have guns!”

That argument is based on the same “strict gun control = taking guns away from citizens” assumption.

Saying "If we have gun control only outlaws will have guns" is like saying "If you outlaw drunk driving, only outlaws will drive drunk."

“Even if we have strict gun control, criminals will just get guns illegally. All you’d get is honest citizens not having any gun, and criminals having guns.”

That makes no sense. So, strict gun control makes it pretty much impossible to get a firearm... but people can still get a firearm easily, even with strict gun control?

“If we have strict gun control, criminals will just use equally effective tools. Like knives, or bombs - which are as accessible and deadly as guns.”

False - but let’s assume for a second that what you’re saying is true. Let’s also say that the government wants to forbid citizens from owning firearms, at all. What are you worried about, then? Just get some bombs and knives. Problem solved.

“You want to prevent civilians from owning semi-automatic weapons? But most commonly used firearms are semi-automatic!”

And that’s a problem. There’s pretty much no reason why the average civilian should have semi-automatic weapons. Last time I’ve checked, the average citizen doesn’t have to worry about 30-50 feral hogs suddenly materializing in his backyard.

"Most crimes are committed with illegally owned weapons. Therefore, strict gun control doesn’t work, because it didn’t remove those illegally owned weapons.”

Except that you don’t have strict gun control. Of-fucking-course it’s easy to get an illegal firearm, when you don’t do shit to stop it.

“But, if we approve strict gun control, it will be used to discriminate against black people! They will be left defenseless against white racists!”

As Odinsblog put it: “ANY law, from marijuana possession to jaywalking to speeding to littering—any of these laws will always be enforced harsher on those of us with darker skin. Same thing goes for gun control. Like, wtf are you even suggesting? Once unarmed by the gubmint, black folks won’t be able to fight …. who? ….. the police? ….. the National Guard? ….. white supremacists? LOL. We ~already~ cannot threaten white people with guns, not even toy guns or imaginary guns that THEY imagined, or we get what Tamir Rice and John Crawford got: shot dead instantly, because of white people’s racist imaginations. Armed or unarmed, black people will never get the same benefit of the doubt that white people get.”

[The same applies for pretty much any other marginalized group.]

“You know, the first thing the Nazi’s did was take guns away from the Jews.”

Are you trying to say that people who want to implement strict gun control (not “take guns away from citizens” are Nazis? You can’t call people “Nazis” just because they disagree with you.

“The Second Amendment gives me the divine right to own firearms, tanks, naval artillery, and nuclear weapons, without any limitation.”

You sound like a religious fanatic.

As the Good Men Project suggests, you should study the following topics:

The historical debate about what the strangely-worded 2nd Amendment even means.

The phrase “well-regulated” contained within said 2nd Amendment.

The restrictions present on every other limited-right in the Constitution (including speech, assembly, religion, redress of grievances.)

The contradiction of how most gun advocates support restricting firearms to some class of citizens, such as convicted felons who just happen to live in prison.

The generally acceptable restriction on civilian ownership of surface-to-air missiles.

How having absolute faith in the Second Amendment means that you pretty much don’t believe in the rest of the Constitution.

“If you try to take away my guns, I’ll kill you, the police, and everyone who tries to stop me.”

And you sound like the kind of person who shouldn’t have access to firearms.

“Now it’s not the time to talk about gun control.”

WHEN it’s the time to talk about gun control? I bet that your answer is “never”.

[hylianengineer]

I think it would be good if everyone took one introductory course in as many fields as possible because a) it changes the way you think about the world and b) you have no idea how often information and skills transfer.

Your English teacher told you you have to obey the grammar rules; linguistics teaches you that language is alive and fluid and free. The only rules that matter are already embedded in your brain anyways (and you can break those too). People who use unusual slang and have different accents and phrase their sentences differently are correct actually, it’s just dialect variation. Which is amazing and beautiful and deserving of respect.

Anthropology’s core tenet is cultural relativism (aka not judging people just because you don’t understand) and you also won’t get an intro class that doesn’t debate it’s limitations too. There is nothing quite like realizing that thing you thought was universal is really, really not. And that thing you thought was universally bad is really not.

Statistics will teach you how numbers can explain the world, and how people will try to manipulate them and you.

Literature is literally about the human experience, and I don’t know what more you could want from a class. Also great for honing your critical thinking skills. Being able to analyze the media you consume is generally a great skill to have.

Sociology teaches you that everyone has a perspective and how to be aware of yours. Also if you aren’t aware of systemic inequalities yet the realization will smack you in the face. (I have know people this has happened to.)

Chemistry is cool. It also has basic lab safety practices that transfer to any STEM field and also some other things. I’m taking a metalsmithing class right now and it’s surprising how much transfers. Eye protection, tying back long hair if you’re working with fire, cleaning up chemical spills, using ventilation when you’re doing stuff that produces fumes, there’s even an eyewash station and a book of Safety Data Sheets in the studio.

Physics is surprisingly practical. In high school physics, I learned (among other things), that taking slower steps on ice will reduce your chances of falling, and if you need to pull something heavy it works better at a slight angle. We tested that last one with a rope and the teacher’s truck, I can confirm it works.

I haven’t taken psychology but I kinda wish I did because I have had to figure out how my brain works the hard way. I’m still learning.

As an environmental science major who’s more interested in emissions than wildlife, I thought biology would be useless to me. Now I’m working on a project about wetland methane emissions, and guess what? Molecular biology is the only reason I understand what’s going on.

If nothing else, learning the basics of computer programming will teach you that while it’s initially not as incomprehensible as it sounds, code does weird shit sometimes. Have some empathy for the programmers, they don’t understand it all either.

Economics is a fun counterpoint to sociology, and I suspect that putting experts in these fields in a room together would be either very entertaining or end very badly. Possibly both. The worldviews clash so much. But it’s also useful stuff, and it can help you understand how lots of people make decisions- including the politicians you vote for.

History! You can’t understand the present if you don’t know how we got here, but that’s far from the only point of this class. A good history class can improve your writing skills, reading comprehension, and ability to back up an argument with sources.

Government / civics: know how the government works so you can understand why the news is so weird all the time. And be an informed voter and stuff. But seriously, this stuff does affect you and it’s good to know how it works. Heard about the filibuster in the news lately? Supreme court nominations? Constitutional rights? It’s all here. (Sorry I know this is obviously for an American perspective and the examples won’t apply elsewhere, but the utility of knowing how things works will always transfer.)

The best thing any art class can teach you is that you can just do it. It doesn’t need to be perfect, you don’t need to be an expert,  and people will both like it and dislike it no matter what it is. Seriously. Go read about the artist who taped a banana to a wall and sold it for $120,000. But wait! It gets weirder. You don’t buy the banana, you buy the rights to reproduce the work and the instructions for making it. Which makes sense because the banana would rot. But it sounds kinda like a proto-NFT now that I think about it. Anyways, the point is that art is literally whatever, the meaning is what you make it, and nobody knows that better than art people. There was an art movement where you didn’t even have to make stuff, you could just find stuff and go “I think this is art” and that was that. Look up “Fountain” by Marcel Duchamp. It’s a urinal turned sideways with “R. Mutt” written on it. That’s it. Duchamp described the phenomenon as "everyday objects raised to the dignity of a work of art by the artist's act of choice.” Art is what you make it and that is so cool. Embrace the chaos.

[thenuanceddebater]

Civil War Response to @uppermandible

So, for whatever reason, I can’t reblog the response @upermandible made to my Civil War post which you can find here. I don’t know why that is, but assuming that I wasn’t blocked and that it’s a tumblr glitch, I’ll do the response here instead. 

so because the union made a law that nobody could leave it the south was just supposed to sit there and take its unfair treatment?

No, but this law “the Union” made (which actually comes from the Constitution which was ratified by both the North and the South) means that the Confederacy has no legitimate right to secede under US law. That means that every single action the Confederacy takes is an act of rebellion against the United States, and that under US law the Confederate States of America doesn’t actually exist. Hence, why the term “Civil War” is still applicable legally speaking. You don’t seem to understand this based on the initial analogy you used (which discussed divorce-- which is a legal matter) and based on your later thoughts in this response as well. 

lets remember that the southern states were disproportionately footing the bill for federal expenses, and were being locked out on how that money was spent, because they had less power in the federal government than the northern states

Disproportionately footing the bill for what exactly? They were being taxed based on population. They artificially exapnded their population numbers through the 3/5 Compromise in the US Constitution. They also agreed to the form of government that was now instituting the bills they didn’t like very much. Also, if you really want to pretend that economics and taxation (or even tariffs) were the primary cause of the Civil War, you’re going to need a heck of a lot of evidence. Since most of the documents of secession didn’t actually mention economics, taxes, or tariffs in the slightest. Do you know what most of them did mention? Slavery. And mistreatment because of slavery. So, please provide me with some primary sources that prove your position here. Otherwise, I’m going to dismiss your argument based on the evidence that actually exists. Oh, and this entire thing is just one gigantic switching the goalpost from “the Confederacy was legitimate in attacking Fort Sumter” to “the Confederacy had moral and understandable reasons for attacking Fort Sumter”. Moral and understandable reasons =/= legitimate. 

the south was not going to be able to afford much of what the federal government was pushing for, and they were otherwise helpless to stop it. their only recourse to this was simply to pack their shit, show Lincoln their favorite finger, then make like horse turds and hit the trail.

You... are aware that the South was wealthier than the North prior to the Civil War, right? Much of that wealth was in land and slaves, but still the South was not a poor area of the United States. Also, none of this makes the Confederate attack on Fort Sumter legitimate. That’s not how legitimacy works. You can tell whatever sob story you want about oppression, but legally speaking oppression does not guarantee legitimacy (especially when that oppression is mostly imagined as opposed to actually extant). 

throughout the interim leading up to the firing on fort sumter, the union was increasingly aggressive to the seceding states. deploying troops to occupy Kentucky, blockading the south, etc. 

...And we’re just going to completely ignore how the Confederacy was attempting to seize federal forts and weapons? Because that doesn’t fit the narrative? Okay. Oh, and also Kentucky declared neutrality at the beginning of the war, but after an attempt by Confederate General Leonidas Polk to take the state failed, they petitioned the Union Army for help. So, that goes against your narrative as well. Especially because Kentucky didn’t come fully under Union control until 1862- well after Fort Sumter fell and the Civil War began. So, maybe check your facts on that one. They seem to be a little off. 

As for blockading the South, you are aware that seeing as the Confederacy had absolutely no legal legitimacy whatsoever it was considered an “area in rebellion” and thus was automatically considered essentially at-war with the United States right? The idea of the blockade was to bring the areas in rebellion back under US control without actually engaging in pitched-battle against American citizens. And again, the United States wasn’t the only side being aggressive. You can’t look at the facts of the situation and tell me that the Confederacy was peaceful and the Confederates were a bunch of angels. Well, I mean you can. But you’d be really, really wrong. 

Most the war was fought in the south. 

Over the course of the war the union lost 642,427 of its 2,672,341-strong military. the confederacy lost  483,026 of its 750,000-strong military.

Irrelevant information is irrelevant. None of this means anything when discussing whether or not the Confederacy’s secession is legitimate. Although, it is worth pointing out that the Union had the harder victory objective, and the South only needed to fight a defensive war. 

Sherman’s army burned everything from atlanta to the coast.

...You are aware that the Union aren’t the only people who burned/ destroyed things right? And you are also aware that the burning of Atlanta wholesale actually wasn’t Sherman’s original plan (or even his plan at all), right? And of course you’re aware that Sherman didn’t in fact burn Savanna Georgia. So, that’s a little misleading. 

very little mercy was shown to even civilians in the south by the union forces

Aaaaand this is downright false. Actually, even the wildest Union troops tended to act much, much better than expected in Confederate households and toward Confederate women. If you don’t believe me, I recommend you read diaries of Confederate matrons who were occupied by Union soldiers, or read some literaure collecting these accounts if you don’t want to track them down individually. I recommend When Sherman Marched North from the Sea: Resistance on the Confederate Home Front. That should clear up some of your misconceptions. 

where even generals ordered that historical monuments to be vandalized 

Not the monuments! Oh the humanity! Still, regardless of whether or not this is accurate (I really don’t know what you’re talking about- it’s general enough to refer to quite a variety of things) destruction of historical monuments is not the same as monumental cruelty to civilian populations. You’re going to need more than just assertions in order to prove that. Sorry. 

even after the war the north took great pains to keep the south crippled

I mean, if you want to talk Reconstruction, we can talk Reconstruction. But, I’m not going to make this post even longer by detailing all the ways this statement is wrong when Reconstruction is unrelated to the Civil War and especially unrelated to the legitimacy of the Confederate Secession. Actually, most of your post is irrelevant to that point. 

even today the south is still responsible for the bulk of federal funds while hardly having a say in how it’s spent.

...You actually can’t be serious with this. Texas (2), Florida (4) [(which isn’t really the South any more)] Georgia (9), North Carolina (10) and Virginia (12) are the Confederate states in the top 15 of states by GDP. Next is Tennessee and Louisiana at 24 which rounds out the Confederate States in the top 25 of states by GDP. South Carolina is 26, Alabama 27, Arkansas is 34, and Mississippi is 37. So, no. The South is definitely not responsible for the majority of federal funds. I have no idea where that nonsense is coming from. But it’s completely and utterly absurd. 

it can be called the war of northern aggression because that is exactly how it went down.

...Except it didn’t. You failed in proving that. Sorry. 

it can be called the war between the states because it was

I mean, sure. That’s a term that;s more popular in the South, but it’s not blatantly incorrect like “War of Northern Aggression”, though the framing is a little off. Also, fun fact: It was called “The Great Rebellion” in the Union during the war.

civil war isn’t really accurate because the confederate states of america was a sovereign nation.

...No it wasn’t. Not legally. If the Confederacy won the Civil War, it’s possible that the war would have been seen as the Confederacy’s Revolutionary War, but they lost. The Confederacy had no legal legitimacy and was not recognized by the United States government as a legal nation. It was an area in rebellion. Simply declaring that you are now a sovereign nation doesn’t actually make you a sovereign nation. Just like simply saying you’re divorced doesn’t actually make you divorced. So, seeing as it was a gigantic rebellion the term Civil War suits it quite nicely. 

And before you even try the American Revolution argument, the United States was not legitimate prior to the Revolutionary War. The Founding Fathers knew this. That’s part of the reason why signing the Declaration of Independence was so courageous. Victory in the Revolutionary War is what made the United States a legitimate nation. Without that victory, even though the Americans did have legitimate political grievance with the British Empire (as they actually were unrepresented unlike the South) they would not have created a legitimate nation through the Declaration of Independence. 

All in all, this was a pretty weak rebuttal. You shifted the goalposts, made assertions without evidence, and got your facts wrong. You’re going to need to do a heck of a lot better if you want to continue the debate. Because this? This was nowhere near good enough. And I think you know that. 

[aion-rsa]

How Call of Duty’s SBMM Controversy Divided a Toxic Multiplayer Community

https://ift.tt/2TcaVZw

Ahead of Call of Duty Black Ops: Cold War‘s release on Nov. 13, the CoD community remains divided on the subject of skill-based matchmaking (SBMM).

Maybe this is the first time you’ve heard about SBMM, but you can rest assured that if you’ve played a Call of Duty game in the last 15 years, you’ve probably been affected by it. In fact, you’ve probably unknowingly participated in the SBMM debate if you’ve played just about any major multiplayer game.

So how has this prevalent and seemingly simple bit of game design become such a venomously contested subject? Here’s an overview of the ongoing SBMM controversy and how it may not only impact the future of the Call of Duty series but the culture of gaming itself…

What is Skill-Based Matchmaking?

Skill-based matchmaking is a way for developers to fill multiplayer lobbies with similarly skilled players to ensure a fairly balanced experience for all participants. Fairly simple, right?

It’s when you dive into the specifics that things become a bit more complicated. While major games such as Apex Legends, Fortnite, and Call of Duty have implemented some form of SBMM in at least some of their play modes, different games utilize different algorithms to determine what equal skill means.

Because developers don’t typically share the full details of their matchmaking algorithms (likely to try to ward off copycats and exploiters), we can only really guess what constitutes “skill” to a formula. For instance, it’s strongly suspected that Call of Duty Black Ops: Cold War’s SBMM system accounts for a player’s “Kill/Death Ratio” as well as other intangibles such as killstreaks and total time played in order to match each player with other participants whose own stats and performance metrics are relatively similar.

Why Do People Like Skill-Based Matchmaking?

While the full answer to this question is really based on personal preference, these are a few things that most fans of SBMM systems will probably tell you:

First off, the idea behind most SBMM systems is solid. If you could perfectly match players based on their actual skill levels against each other at all times, you could eliminate frustrating balance issues caused by more general matchmaking systems. Furthermore, you could help ensure that every multiplayer match offered the kind of competitive experience that they were designed to deliver. Granted, there is no such thing as an SBMM system that is perfect at all times, but even imperfect applications of these systems help eliminate some of the more obvious instances of unfair matchmaking.

SBMM is especially important to fairly casual (or “the average”) players of multiplayer games. Imagine coming home, playing the two Call of Duty multiplayer matches you’ll get to squeeze in that night, and being matched against pro or top tier amateur players. While your mileage may vary, you’ll most likely end your game night feeling like you barely had the chance to enjoy the matches you played.

Maybe that’s an extreme example of the problem, but the basic benefits of SBMM remain the same: to ensure a more balanced competitive experience for players of all skill levels. It’s also been suggested that SBMM games tend to have better player retention rates, which could be one of the driving metrics that inspire companies to implement such systems in the first place.

Why Do People Hate Skill-Based Matchmaking?

There are a few potential problems with SBMM, but its most vocal critics tend to be streamers, pro players, and others who spend quite a bit of time playing a particular competitive multiplayer game.

Their main complaint is that SBMM systems aren’t really designed with them in mind. The issue, they say, is that high-level players being grouped with high-level players at all times makes it almost impossible to just sit down and enjoy a game casually. Some claim that even players who are not pros are being treated like professional participants by SBMM systems. As such, they’re constantly having to play at the top of their game against other high-level players.

Other logistical issues impact the benefits of SBMM for high-level players. For instance, some games make it difficult (or impossible) for high-level players to group with their low-level friends in SBMM titles, while most SBMM game also make high-level players wait longer to find a lobby which accommodates their “needs.” It’s also been pointed out that cheaters are more likely to find their way into high-level SBMM lobbies unless they intentionally tank their stats (or kill themselves during matches) to ensure they’re matched with low-level players.

I’m not kidding, 7/8 solo games after Warzone Wednesday I had a hacker kill me at airport; and chase me across the map after I won a gulag and kill me again. Thank God Valorant beta goes live tomorrow.

— NinjaInnit (@Ninja) April 7, 2020

There comes a point and time where players who play Call of Duty extensively, like us, can no longer enjoy the game because SBMM forces us in lobbies that are not enjoyable. It’s not about pub-stomping. It’s about the experience for all players; not just about the new players.

— Call of Duty News (@charlieINTEL) September 19, 2020

To be fair, critics of SBMM aren’t limited to pros and other players who devote more hours to a particular game. Some contend that even more casual players will eventually reach a skill ceiling where they too will be matched incorrectly with other players based more on perceived skill level instead of preference. To put it another way, SBMM works under the assumption that you want to play a highly-contested game at all times. For some, that’s simply not the case.

There are some possible workarounds for that issue, but before we dive into them, we should really talk about what truly makes SBMM such a controversial concept: the culture of competitive multiplayer games, especially the culture of Call of Duty.

How Did Call of Duty’s SBMM System Divide the Community?

At this point, you may be asking, “So, are really good multiplayer gamers just upset that they’re not getting matched against lesser players?” There’s a degree to which the answer to that question is “Yes.”

Lately, if I don’t see friends online, then I just freeze up and don’t know what to do. I can’t play these skill based matchmaking games by myself or else I turn incredibly toxic because it’s like I’m competing for the damn Olympics in every single one of my lobbies.

— Jack “CouRage” Dunlop (@CouRageJD) March 2, 2020

Skill Based Matchmaking on Warzone seems to have reached another level lately. Can we just have 1 day a week where games are more laid back 😩

— 100T Nadeshot (@Nadeshot) July 21, 2020

In the SBMM debate, there is a group of players who feel that it’s something of a rite of passage for lower-skilled players to occasionally be matched with higher skilled players. It’s a mentality based partially on the old-school methods of matchmaking which didn’t always take skill level into account or at least didn’t emphasize that element as a primary matchmaking parameter. Some players feels that if they went through the process of facing much tougher opponents, then everyone should. There are even some who have called SBMM a system for “participation trophy” players who they believe don’t want to be matched against “better” players.

SBMM is for participation trophy kids.

— Justin Chandler (@KOSDFF) September 20, 2020

Not everyone who criticizes SBMM buys into or touts that “participation trophy” mentality, but there is a general feeling among the anti-SBMM crowd that the multiplayer games need a space where SBMM isn’t used. For some content creators, for example, the anti-SBMM mentality is an extension of their desire to more easily produce YouTube highlight videos by playing against opponents of lesser skill.

This brings us to “try-hard” players.

if you like SBMM in video games that say's a lot about you. You have no drive, no confidence, no resilience, and no work ethic and probably wont make it anywhere in life.

— Call of Duty News (@charlieINTEL) September 19, 2020

Also known as a “sweaty” player, the exact definition of a try-hard player isn’t exactly set in stone, but the term typically applies to players who other gamers believe are taking a multiplayer game too seriously and are trying too hard to win. The term can apply to cheaters and those who get angry at their teammates during matches, but it’s not uncommon to hear it used to slander anyone who camps with a sniper rifle or uses the most powerful weapon in a game rather than a “fun” alternative.

It’s a popular belief among those in the anti-SBMM community that so-called “sweaty” players are the ones who keep pushing for skill-based matchmaking. This claim is particularly popular with streamers and content creators who say that they’re tired of being matched against try-hard players who force them to play so intensely just to survive a match when they just want to relax, have fun, and occasionally just goof off.

That mentality has been criticized by some who point out that those whose livelihoods are partially based on spending hundreds (or thousands) of hours in a game would also qualify as try-hard players according to broad definitions of the word. Of course, that’s the other problem. The use of “try-hard’ as an insult is really based on perception. You can really throw it out in just about any instance and justify it however you’d like. While many agree that in-game cheaters and toxic teammates are typically deserving of the phrase, the fact is that the usage of “try-hard” is typically proportional to a player’s anger at any given time.

It’s another example of how the SBMM argument often boils down to emotion. What about logical solutions to this potential problem, though?

Read more

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By Lloyd Coombes

How Can Call of Duty Fix Its SBMM “Problem?”

Many of those who oppose SBMM in games are often quick to note that the solution to this problem lies in the expansion of a game’s ranked system.

Again, people differ on the details, but the idea is that most competitive multiplayer games should feature at least two modes. The first mode, designed for more casual play, will not utilize SBMM (or will at least use a very toned-down version of the matchmaking system) while the second, a ranked mode, will utilize SBMM and give players official rankings and rewards for reaching new levels.

On paper, it’s a solid solution, based on the belief that SBMM systems don’t offer an accurate indication of a player’s skill level or any incentives to reach a higher skill threshold. In other words, top players are doing all the work of playing against other top players but they have nothing to really show for it outside of the pleasure of playing in a theoretically competitively balanced environment.

The implementation of an expansive ranking system complete with rewards isn’t even all that far-fetched. Games like Hearthstone, Overwatch, and League of Legends all offer some kind of a reward and ranking system. While few would claim that any of those games feature perfect matchmaking, those games are obviously not caught in the crossfire of the SBMM controversy quite like Call of Duty, Apex Legends, and Fortnite.

While an extensive ranking system could solve some of the SBMM problems, it’s not a perfect solution.

Idk, random thoughts talking general BR modes. SBMM doesn't work and ranked also doesn't work IMO. It's a BR at the end of the day maybe it is just best as a dev to try to do your best to balance everything in one and leave it at that.

— Michael Grzesiek (@shroud) March 25, 2020

The biggest problem with implementing a ranking system brings us back to the question of preference. If you are a casual player and a game offers you both Casual and Ranked mode options, you may assume that the Casual option will offer a more relaxed play experience. However, under the most popular variations of this solution, Casual modes could match you against nearly anyone, meaning that the chances of being matched against players well-above your skill level are much higher there. Meanwhile, in SBMM-enabled ranked option, players would be further incentivized to play with a competitive mindset to earn new rankings and rewards. That could lead to an increasingly toxic gaming environment, especially in team and squad-based modes, while leaving those who want to just play more casual matches with even less options.

Some games, like Hearthstone’s recently revamped Battlegrounds mode, still use an internal rating system to determine matchmaking that doesn’t always match up with the external rank conveyed to the player. SBMM critics point out that such systems make many modern ranking systems useless since they still don’t relay a player’s skill level relative to matchmaking. Some SBMM defenders note that internal matchmaking parameters are often more reliable in comparison to in-game ranked systems that can sometimes be exploited by individual players.

While many SBMM solutions involve some kind of extensive ranking system, further alternatives exist. One of the more interesting proposals involves going back (at least to an extent) to the days of private playlists and custom server selections. Players argue that a more classic approach would not only foster better communities of like-minded players but that they offer gamers more opporunities to find multiplayer matches that fit their needs.

We could go on, but it all comes back to the same point. There’s not really a perfect system, and many SBMM alternatives suffer from logistical hurdles that made SBMM systems increasingly popular in the first place.

Will Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War Have a SBMM System at Launch?

The Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War development team has indicated that some kind of SBMM system will be featured in the final version of the game. While Treyarch will undoubtedly continue to tweak Cold War’s multiplayer systems ahead of release, it doesn’t seem like SBMM will be going away any time soon. In fact, at least one member of the series’ development team recently defended SBMM as a concept and cited its uses in just about every major Call of Duty game in modern times.

They all had SBMM. https://t.co/POpRwO0qXR

— Martin Donlon (@wickerwaka) September 19, 2020

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Of course, the bigger issue is how SBMM has divided the gaming (and especially Call of Duty) community. It’ll be interesting to see whether major multiplayer studios will pursue alternatives or serious modifications to existing SBMM systems in an attempt to bridge the increasingly widening cultural gap.

The post How Call of Duty’s SBMM Controversy Divided a Toxic Multiplayer Community appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3mamz3D

[chasingparamasturbatoryillusions]

MSR for the ship meme

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME!

General:

Rate the Ship:  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last?  Scully’s immortal, so probably until Mulder dies.

How quickly did/will they fall in love?  HM.  I feel like that’s debatable based on character and who you ask and your definition of love.  You can make the argument that Mulder was in love by Scully’s abduction, but I don’t buy into that.  But he definitely was by the time she almost died from cancer so.  I think he knew sometime during s4, during the latter half, and I think that’s definitely - you can make arguments about the beginning of Memento Mori, and I think those are correct, and it was definitely a mutual thing by the first movie, so I would say the end of s4 at the latest for both of them.  Not that they did anything about it.  For another two years.

How was their first kiss?  –gonna start by assuming that Millennium was not the first kiss because that.  didn’t.  feel like.  a first kiss?  And so much of that aspect of their relationship happens where we, as viewers, don’t see it, that I feel it was likely for that, too, and I think.  I think the first time would’ve been.  Not an accident, but.  Smaller?  Like that moment where you’re not quite sure that what you’re about to do is a good idea, but you do it anyway?  And the thing is that, like, in writing people build up these really slow and sensual and romantic first kisses, and the thing is, they’re not all like that.  And I think, maybe, this was one of those moments where it wasn’t…it wasn’t big at first, it was small and a taste and Mulder’d probably had something with onions or too much garlic so he had to go brush that taste out and then they tried again, and it was awkward because they knew but then the third time was right and they settled.

Wedding:

Who proposed?  I think proposals are probably far too overly romantic for either of them and it was more of a discussion that ended with marriage not as a conclusion but as something they realized they both wanted from each other (as opposed to other conclusions where they individually realized it was something they wanted but thought the other didn’t).

Who is the best man/men?  Skinner.  Maybe Doggett if they can find him.  But, honestly, this is Mulder.  Who else would he ask?  Who else does he know?  But this also assumes that, like,they had a big wedding where they did that sort of thing, and I’m not sure that’s the case. WILLIAM.  Because they totally aren’t married yet and since they’re not I can assume big happy family and YO HAVE WILLIAM.

Who is the braid’s maid(s)?  …gut instinct says Reyes but right now she’s off with CSM which is kind of a betrayal, so I.  don’t know.  If Melissa were still alive, it would’ve been her, but.  I still think it should’ve been Reyes, and if that problem gets fixed, I still think it would be.  But then you run into that same question of - these two are really secluded in what they do, so there’s not really a large swath of people they know and trust for this sort of thing.

Who did the most planning?  Scully.  Don’t let Mulder plan a wedding.  It would not go well.

Who stressed the most?  Mulder.  Because he’s bad about dates and events and being on time and this is one of those things where it’s kind of important you be on time, Mulder but also his guilt complex would have him think that there are better options for Scully out there and.  I think Scully would stress more about the general ceremony, but Mulder would stress more about the marriage aspect.

How fancy was the ceremony?  Not very.  I think it was small.  And informal.  And I know there’s a sliding scale but let me do a general answer, too.  Because, for me, the number is more indicative of size than anything.Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding?  …CSM.  Krycek, if he were still alive.  But mostly CSM.

Sex:

Who is on top?  Mulder.

Who is the one to instigate things?  Scully.

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7, if five is once every couple of weeks | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they?Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last?  The question is not how long but how frequent.  Plus One suggests that a couple of hours is more than enough time but also suggests that they can go once and then be good to go again a few hours later.  So–  I’d say it depends on who needs what.  They go longer if Mulder has the opportunity for oral.  Just saying.

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms?  No, because sometimes a man wants to please his wife but doesn’t really need an orgasm himself, yo.

How rough are they in bed?  And gonna give a general on this in relation to the sliding scale because.  I don’t think Mulder does rough.  I really don’t think that’s in his sexual vocabulary.  But also I don’t know why really dirty talk constitutes as super rough, so.  -shrugs-Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 but only in comparison to four, because I don’t think every time is a thing. | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do?  –I don’t think this is an in public sort of number, though, and honestly, if I remember correctly, Scully very much wants touch, and Mulder’s typically going to be open to it, even if it’s just small things.No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:     you didn’t.

How many children will they have naturally? One.

How many children will they adopt? None.

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? Scully.  Because Mulder wasn’t around.  (Otherwise Mulder because Scully would have an actual job and Mulder would totally be a stay-at-home conspiracy theory crazy dad.)

Who is the stricter parent? Given the opportunity, Mulder, because he knows how to find shit on a computer and get the kid in trouble for it.

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school?  Neither because they didn’t raise him.  Scully.  But only if she got to him before Mulder convinced him to pull the dangerous stunt.

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)?  Neither because they didn’t raise him.  Scully.  Because if she let Mulder do it, half of the food would be inedible.  (Mulder would give him cash to buy a school lunch.)

Who is the more loved parent?  Scully because she gets visions and Mulder got nothing.  Still Scully.  I mean.  Mulder’s the kind of dad who wants to be cool dad which is nice, but let’s be real, everyone loves Scully more.

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings?  Neither because they didn’t raise him.  Scully would want to be there, but Mulder was the one who actually showed up because the hospital needed her for whatever reason and if you don’t think Mulder is one of the stereotypical PTA moms.

Who cried the most at graduation?  Scully.

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law?  MULDER.

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking?  If anyone in this family cooks, it’s William, because Scully’s at the hospital and Mulder burns water.

Who is the most picky in their food choice?  Scully.  With her diets.  And salads.  And low-fat food.

Who does the grocery shopping?  Mulder and William, which causes problems, because they want junk food and microwave dinners and hamburgers and conveniently forget to get salads and healthy things and Scully gives them the look and then they have to go back except it’s during the week so Mulder has to go by himself and it’s nowhere near as much fun.

How often do they bake desserts?  They don’t.  William is not a baker, Scully’s at work, and Mulder…could maybe make brownies from a box.  But he’d add a bunch of sugar and they’d be inedible except with a TON of milk.  Skim milk.

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater?  Mulder is a meat eater, but as a whole they probably eat more salads because when they eat as a family, William caters to what his mom wants (and let’s be real, so would Mulder).

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner?  Neither.  Well.  Mulder would try, but it would be a disaster, so he’d think about it and…try again under the impression he’d do better this time, and it still wouldn’t work out.  Eventually it would, but by the time it did, Scully would have learned not to trust his anniversary cooking attempts.

Who is more likely to suggest going out?  Scully.  Because that is significantly safer.

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking?  Mulder wants to let all of you know that he can cook basic meals and he is not helpless in the kitchen.  But also he would totally be the one more likely to burn the house down because he experiments with food in ways that he really, really shouldn’t.

Chores:

Who cleans the room?  Scully.

Who is really against chores?  Mulder.

Who cleans up after the pets?  Scully.

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug?  Mulder.

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over?  Mulder.

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning?  William.

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths?  Scully.

Who takes the dog out for a walk?  They do this together.

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays?  Not very.  It’s something they would do more for William than as a general rule.

What are their goals for the relationship?  Not dying.  This sounds like a joke.  But it’s true - not dying.  Being able to have a full, long life together.  Even if it’s not always happy and even if there are moments of darkness.  Being together and a source of light despite all of that.

Who is most likely to sleep till noon?  Mulder, despite his insomnia, is definitely the one who would sleep until noon.  (Unless Scully had a graveyard shift, at which point it would be more logical to get however many hours of sleep she needed, and then - and probably only then - would she sleep until noon.)

Who plays the most pranks?  Mulder, but I think there’s definitely an air of fun when it comes to the family.  I can see all three of them playing pranks, and I think, in a happier world, it’s something they definitely both would, when they’re both in a good place.  But Mulder would take the cake on this.

[pirate-autobot]

The Experiment: Ch 7

Parent/principal conference! Followed by Principal/council conference. Followed by... well, see for yourself.

Captain Underpants gem au by @angerydj

When detention was over, Red Agate escorted the gems home. He made hem walk in front of him. Because he couldn’t stand their talking to each other. He also made sure they didn’t stop to look at anything. If they did, he would wait for a couple seconds, then click his heels together. They’d jump at the sound and continue walking.

Yes, you infants. Fear the click.

Their homes were near the outskirts of the colony. Small residents that resemble different human homes filled what resembled a human neighborhood. It was strange. As soon as the colony finally adapted to their new lives, they picked up human tendencies and ideals.

They sleep, they keep track of days and nights and what calender date on Earth it is, and some even eat. In fact, an emerald who traveled to the human town returned with seeds. And she is starting a garden. The council debated it, but ultimately decided it was allowed. Some of the food grown can go to Blue Agate to be made for the young gems.

Just so long as no Earth pests make their way into the colony.

Red Agate nearly stepped on the boys when they stopped at two identical houses. But they talked and went to only one. And he was pretty certain no gem received two infants. Following them, he noticed something in the backyard of the house next door. It was still under construction, but he couldn’t tell what is was.

“What is that?” He asked

“That’s my tree!” Red Zircon answered proudly. “My dad is making me one based on the ones up top!”

“Making a tree? What a waste of time.” Red Agate scoffed with a roll of his eyes. “And why are you both going in one house?”

“My parents are still at work.” Red Zircon answered, crossing his arms.

Yellow Sapphire opened the door. The two boys ran in happily.

“Hello boys! What took you so long?” Came a female voice. Red Agate followed them down the entry hall. Perhaps the gem mother needed to hear about the trouble her infant got into at school.

“We got detention. And it was not fun.” Yellow Sapphire answered

Red Agate found both boys in an open space with a couch, a table, and two chairs. Red Zircon was typing on a datapad, while Yellow Sapphire was drawing on more paper.

“Well, gee sweetie. Sorry to hear that.” The voice came closer. Red Agate froze at the sight of a beryl who poked her head into the space. She was surprised to see him. But she also looked... relieved.

“Sorry to, uh, intrude. I’m their principal, Red Agate.” Red Agate introduced himself

“He gave us detention!” Red Zircon commented. Red Agate sent a glare his way, but felt small hands pulling him away from the scene.

“I was wondering when I might see you in person. ” She said, leading him into what looked like a bedroom.

“Uh, wha, what? You were expecting me?” Red Agate asked

“You are the agate in charge of the school, right? There aren’t any other red agates in the colony?” Beryl asked, leaning forward. 

“Uh, not that I know of.” Red Agate looked away, “But on the subject of school, your sapphire and his zircon friend were disrupting their class because they were drawing and writing, not doing their work. I think you need to have a talk with them both about that subject.” Red Agate said, his hands behind his back. He was pleased he was able to take charge of the conversation. But Beryl was confused.

“They weren’t hurting anyone with it.” She said

“They could have hurt someone with their paint filled balloons they were throwing around the halls!” Red Agate exclaimed

“Oh that’s what they were using the paint for. Sorry. If it’s so bad, I’ll have a talk.” Beryl explained. Red Agate was unsure what to say. He didn’t expect the argument to go that way.

“Well, thank you, Beryl.” Red Agate said, nodding his head. 

“But that isn't why I’m glad you’re here.” Beryl admitted. From a nearby shelf, she picked up a datapad. Or at least, it was as thick as one. It had drawings along the back of it, and looked to be filled with more paper. “You are part of the council, correct?”

“Uh. They let me watch and have input, but technically, no.” Red Agate responded

And that was simply how it was. The other gems would ask for his opinion on certain subjects, or he would make his opinion known without being asked. But he didn’t have a seat at the table. Despite being in charge of the infant gem education. At least he knew the tanzanite who took Citrines place.

At least it wasn’t P.

“Are you aware of any other sapphires in the colony?” Beryl asked

“A green one, but she can only see the past.” Red Agate said, “Where are you going with this?”

"I'm worried about my sapphire. I was wondering if the council or another gem could help. He dreams when he sleeps. And sometimes, he wakes up and has to tell me everything he saw. It was too hard to keep track of. That’s why we made a dream journal.” Beryl explained. “He's been drawing a lot, lately. But then a few weeks ago, he dreamt of you coming over to our house." 

She opened the journal to a certain page. It was a drawing of Beryl pulling Red Agate away.

“That’s...” Red Agate started

Amazing? Incredible? Crazy? A good sign, a bad sign? He couldn’t think of the right word to say. Not until he blurted one word out.

“Clarity.” He said

“It’s not exact, and it doesn’t come often. But yes. He has clarity.” Beryl explained. "Here are a few others you might want to see."  

She flipped through the journals pages. There was a picture of Orange Peridot proudly walking with one limb enhancement over his right arm. Another showed the same gem crying over a bubbled gem, his limb enhancer missing. Another picture showed Yellow Sapphire with a shield and Red Zircon with a whip. A machine was behind them, piloted by a gem he couldn’t identify. 

Another was only a gem. It was bright green, but it had garish splatters of red throughout it. The word “no” was scribbled all around it. He had never seen a gem like that anywhere else.

"Well, at least his... visions are only of colony gems." Red Agate said 

"They aren't." Beryl responded, finding a drawing of three gems and a human on a warp pad.

Red Agate took the journal to try to get a closer look at the gems. The drawing was sketchy and rough, but perhaps he could tell what kind of gems they were. A tall gem, pointy nose, looked kind of regal. Had to be a pearl. That short one was purple. Was it an amethyst? If it was, he’d never seen one that short before. The tall one with square hair. That was usually the style of rubies. If a short amethyst was possible, then so was a tall ruby he supposed.

But what was so special about the human to be with gems? Dark curly hair, a wide frame, a shirt with a star in the center. Actually, they all had stars on their forms in some way.

That ruby though...

“Who are they?” He asked

“I don’t know. And he doesn’t know. He drew this and said they were important.” Beryl explained

“How could a human, a pearl, a short amethyst, and a tall ruby be important?” Red Agate asked

“I know Sapphire drawing is not what he should be doing. But this is the only way for him to connect with his power until he fully grows into it. Can you please make an exception in his case?” Beryl asked

Red Agate looked at her. Too many questions and scenarios were running through his head. He imagined gems going to the sapphire with questions of the future. He wouldn’t be able to answer them. He imagined himself being one of those gems. But Zircon would protect him. But the drawings from class were nothing like these.

When is the Cluster going to emerge? Who are these gems?

“No.” Red Agate shook his head, “If I let him be an exception, then other gems would beg for their children to be their own exceptions for menial reasons that do not constitute any form of ‘an exception’. Sapphire was not drawing anything envisioned. That’s why he got in trouble. And if he keeps it up, he’ll keep getting in trouble. The both of them will.”

“I understand.” Beryl sighed. She took back the journal.

“W-wait. Can I get a picture of that drawing?” Red Agate asked. Beryl nodded her head and held out the journal. Red Agate pulled out his datapad. With a snap, the image was saved onto his pad.

“Enjoy the rest of your day.” She said softly

Without another word, Red Agate left the house. The council should be meeting about now.

“Red Agate, just in time.” Tanzanite commented as he entered the room.

“Quartz,” he started

“Agate.” Came the bored response. The gem was leaning back in her seat, her feet propped up on the table.

“First, feet off the table.” He said. She mumbled something, then crossed her arms, eventually obeying. “Second, have you seen any of these gems before?”

He pulled out his datapad and projected the image above all gems, enlarging the drawing.

“Why? Was one of them your old girlfriend?” Yellow Quartz mocked. Red Agate felt his spots heat up.

“If not all of them, then what about this ruby. I thought you brought an image of her here before. She was some sort of intruder?” Red Agate tried to recall the meeting.

A strange gem had been spotted. Some blurry security images caught her, but nothing solid had been found.

“Her? Oh. Oh oh!” Yellow Quartz. “She was spotted again last week!”

She brought up a security image that was the best picture of the mystery gem.

Square hair, a strange visor, a star somewhere on her outfit. But no sign of her gem.

“That’s not a ruby.” Ruby commented. All eyes looked to her for an explanation. “Rubies are never made that tall. She kind of looks like one, but she’s too different. She must be a fusion!” 

“How would you know what a fused ruby looks like?” Red Agate asked, narrowing his gaze at the gem.

“Wh-what? Uh, I mean, I... uh...” Ruby stammered. Topaz and Pearl moved in front of her, leveling their glares at the agate.

“Oh ho ho ho!” Laughed Yellow Quartz

“Knock it off Yellow!” The three gems yelled

Red Agate pinched the bridge of his nose. He felt his spots and his hands heating up. No, none of that. Calm down, or no reef time.

“In any case,” Tanzanite said, “Can you keep your quartzs and amethysts on guard, in case she shows up again? Who knows what she’s doing here.”

“Yeah yeah yeah, but how is she getting in here?” Red Agate asked

“Isn’t it obvious?” A new voice intruded. The room was filled with groans as the watermelon tourmaline known as P made his way in.

“What are you doing here?” Red Agate asked him, “What is he doing here?” He asked tanzanite.

“He keeps coming asking for more supplies and test subjects for his experiments. He trying to figure out how to alter gems,”  Tanzanite started

And just like that, Red Agate summoned his whip and cracked it forward. It wrapped around P and pulled him back. He winced at the heat, but tried to keep his smirk in place.

“Nice moves, but really, how do you think that quote unquote fusion got in here?” He asked. 

He had nothing. Red Agate wanted to say that she walked in, but the fusion wouldn’t do that. Even the gems who explore different the human town haven’t seen her up top.

P untangled himself from the whip. It was a shocking sight. He adjusted his tie and looked at the gems sitting around the table.

“I think we are missing the obvious option. One night in my lab, I detected an energy reading, here in the colony.” P climbed up onto the table. “Eventually, I came to a conclusion.”

“What?” Red Agate asked

“You were wrong!” P said loudly, pointing an accusatory finger at Red Agate. Gasps filled the room. Whispers soon filled the silence that followed.

“What do you mean P?” Tanzanite asked

“The warp pad works!” He announced

From his coat, he produced a remote. With a push of a button, a video was projected above everyone. P waved at the camera than climbed onto the warp pad. It glowed and shined, and he was gone. The tourmaline looked back at Red Agate with a smirk.

In fact, all eyes turned to him.

“But... I tested it. It tested it myself!” He yelled

“Yeah, but you’ve got a little,” P walked up to him, smirk still in place, “imperfection,” he tapped on Red Agates gem, “that might hinder the pad. But hey! A gem is still useful, even if it’s corrupted!” He chuckled to himself.

Red Agate stared in shock. He did not say a word. It was disconcerting. His spots glowed brighter. Heat radiated off of him.

“Agate?” Tanzanite asked

Red Agate climbed onto the table, the same shocked look still on his face. P backed away from the gem that was stomping towards him, leaving charred footprints behind. He felt his teeth sharpening in his mouth.

“Agate! What are you doing?” Yellow Quartz asked

The other voices of the other gems were drowned out. Red Agate was humiliated and wanted P to pay. Imperfection? Corrupted!? He’ll give that tourmaline an imperfection. P fell off the table, but Red Agate couldn’t find himself following. 

He looked down at the cowering gem.

The other red agate was thrown to the ground. He was trying to be nice, and that was the thanks he got? The Quartz thought he was better than him?! Red Agate summoned his whip

Aggy!

Every gem on the council had grabbed on to his arms trying to stop him.

As his fists cooled, he could hear the yelling once again.

He blocked it out and left the chamber, trying not to heat up again. No reef time. Just go home, and cool down. how long had his fce been wet? Was he crying?

Why was he crying?

He looked around his empty home.

Something was missing.

The boys were playing in they backyard of Yellow Sapphires house. They were drawing and coming up with a monster story. The monster was going to be the hero.

“And make him have really big teeth!” Red Zircon said, standing up and holding his arms over his head. 

He roared and stomped like a monster. Yellow Sapphire laughed and stood to join in the fun. He tripped, but Zircon caught him. They smiled and laughed at each other. It took them a second to notice the gem watching them beyond their fence. They all stared.

“Hi.” Yellow Sapphire said, waving at her.

“Dude! Don’t talk to strange gems!” Red Zircon whispered

“I have a good feeling about her.” Yellow Sapphire whispered back before running to the fence. “I’m Yellow Sapphire, and that’s my friend Red Zircon.” Red Zircon sighed and ran overnight to join his friend.

“Nice to meet you both,” she said in a smooth voice. “But didn’t you come up with your own human names?”

That was a secret only they shared. Red Zircon noticed his friend was frozen from the shock. Luckily, he wasn’t the kind of sapphire that took the phrase literally. He took his hand and gave it a squeeze.

“M-my name is Harold.” He said

“And I’m George.” Red Zircon added, suddenly looking away.

“Nice to meet you both, again. My name is Garnet.” She said

“I like your hair.” George admitted, feeling his cheeks heat up.

“I like your friendship.” Garnet said. “Hold on to it. Don’t let go. And dance like nobody is watching.” 

The strange gem lowered her glasses, showing her three eyes to the boys. Only one winked at them before she pushed them back on, and walked away.

“That was the coolest gem we have ever met.” George said