#it was all done on one layer except for the text

[hencheri]

make you mine

18+ mdni.

You've never suspected the evil would have taken the form of Jay, a hot guy from your college, but when he takes interest in you, you rapidly discover the secret he's been hiding.

pairing: jock!jay x fem!reader

wc: 5.7k

warnings: graphic description of gore (mention of blood & injuries), dubcon, implied inexperienced!reader, unprotected sex, jay's kinda mean but hey he's evil so ain't my fault lol.

a.n.: jennifer's body au cause why not. old fic from an old blog, but it's still my fav of all time <3

Jay thinks he never felt that much pain in his whole entire life. It’s like his soul is screaming from the inside out, as if someone stabbed him in the stomach, tearing his guts apart. 

Oh, but that’s what actually happened…

How can he still be alive? He swears he was dead seconds ago, losing liters of blood through the cut in his stomach. But he’s very much conscious right now, getting out of the woods he was brutally murdered in. 

Well, is it still even murder if he survived? 

It doesn’t matter anymore anyway. All he can think about at this moment is how hungry he is. He would devour anything he can put his hand on, and god, why does the person on the other side of the street look so… edible? 

He feels the dried blood that dripped from his mouth stick to his skin as his hands are stained in the same red substance, holding his stomach where, surprisingly, he is no longer bleeding from.The pain is atrocious, but he needs to fucking eat, and so he approaches the person faster. 

The moment they notice him, their eyes grow bigger and they let out a strident scream, but Jay gives them no time to leave.

He doesn’t know what in the hell possesses him to jump on that poor human, his teeth becoming sharper than they ever were, shredding their neck in pieces, their screams slowly dying down as he eats like a starved animal.

The fresh blood is coating the dried layer on his chin. He feels like an uncontrollable beast, and he’s literally acting like one right now. No one with a right mind would have ever done this… but it’s like he isn’t a human. 

He was revived from the dead, there’s nothing human about him anymore. Nothing.

He has an idea as to why this happened. 

Those girls — that girl band who he seemed so enthralled by — sacrificed him, and for what…? For fame? For money? Whatever it is, they killed the wrong person because obviously the sacrifice didn’t fucking work. He’s still very much alive. 

He’s cursed now, that’s for sure. Or whatever the hell is happening to him. 

He looks down at his victim; it’s a man. 

He suddenly feels nauseous, vomiting what he had so far swallowed. A dark liquid comes out of his mouth, and god, it’s even more painful than the cut in his stomach. 

He feels disgusted by himself — why isn’t he full? Eating felt so good, considering how starved he was, but it’s like he ate something … expired. 

What’s wrong with him… He ate someone’s guts, of course it doesn’t taste like a 5 stars meal. Then why did his instinct tell him to do that? 

That’s fucked up. 

The next few days are horrible for Jay. 

After that night, he doesn’t eat anything except for raw chicken and other types of meat that are just not enough to satiate him. It doesn't taste good either. 

He lays in bed most of the time, having no energy, skipping the gym and his practices, which he usually never does. He gets texts from his friends, but he doesn’t bother to check his phone. 

It’s on Sunday night that he decides to leave his bed, going to look at himself in the mirror. He has big dark circles under his eyes — not particularly flattering. He’s still very hungry, but none of the food in his fridge makes him want to eat. 

There’s one thing he’d want, though… 

It’s when he receives a text from a specific person that he knows what to do. 

iseul: hey, jay. wanna study together for the finals?

—-

“Hey, man,” Jay’s teammate, Jungwon, greets him. “Heard about Hana? That’s fucked up,” he says, walking beside his friend. “And right after Iseul… My parents refuse my sister to go out alone now.”

“Yeah, I heard,” Jay replies, not really caring, but still listening. 

It’s not like anybody liked Hana before, he doesn’t understand why everybody suddenly cares now that she’s dead. She needed to die to finally have some importance. How sad. 

She wasn’t that good of a laid either, so really, what’s the matter? Sure, it’s tragic, but who’s going to miss her besides her family. 

“Can’t be an animal at this point,” his teammate says under his breath, “Do you wanna know what I’m thinking?”

Not really…

“What?”

“I’m thinking it’s gotta be some ‘Jack the Ripper’ kinda guy. You know those freaks who wanna be the modern this or that.”

Kind of offensive… 

Jay rolls his eyes without Jungwon noticing, snickering at his words.

“The police’s saying it’s a bear or some shit,” Jay explains, reaching his class. “That’s more believable than your ‘modern Jack the Ripper’.” He mimics quotes with his fingers, stopping in front of the classroom. 

Jungwon still doesn’t seem convinced, but it’s not Jay’s job to make him less stupid. He can believe what he wants, he’s not an investigator even though he thinks he is. 

“See you at practice, alright?”

“Yeah, later, man.”

Jay has never been very attentive in class. He doesn’t care about a lot of things and college is one of them. He wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for his parents and their high expectations of him. 

He’s looking outside the windows, noticing the grey clouds, heavy rain pouring from the sky. A flash of lighting breaks through the sky, hearing the thunder a second after. 

Nobody seems attentive either, all interested in the thunderstorm that’s starting. It might be the strongest they’ve seen in a couple of years. 

“Crap,” the teacher says as the electricity is cut off, surely because of the thunder. 

Girls are gasping, some of them whispering to each other about how creepy the situation is while the professor waits for the power to get back on.

Jay’s phone lights up as he gets a new notification. He takes a look, reading the text he just received. 

jungwon: practice’s canceled.. 

Great, Jay thinks. He really needed to get some steam off, but it won’t happen today. 

“Sir!” A girl raises her hand, catching the attention of the professor. “All classes got canceled. Can we leave? Apparently the power isn’t coming back for a few hours.”

The professor seems quite disappointed, but he lets everyone go back home, seeing no point in staying if he can’t teach. 

While exiting the classroom, Jay gets bumped into by someone. He doesn’t move much, but the person drops their books on the floor, bending down to pick them up hurriedly. 

“Shit… Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” you apologize, standing back up when you have all of your books in your arms.

“It’s fine,” Jay mumbles and you give him a straight smile.

He recognizes you from highschool, a girl he never talked to, but who he knew the name of. Then, he watches you walking away for a short moment, eyeing the curves of your silhouette, memorizing it. 

—-

You’re in the cafeteria, sitting with your friends, waiting for about a good 30 minutes now. The storm from yesterday is still ongoing, and the power is very unstable, cutting off every now and then.

The finals are scheduled for today and the administration told the students to come regardless of the storm, thinking it would stop during the night. So you’re waiting to be sent to the gym where the exams are usually taking place, but seeing the electricity goes off and comes back every second, it isn’t the best time to start an exam. 

People are free to go, it’s college after all, but most of the students are staying in case a decision is made. You know you wouldn’t want to skip your exam, that’s why you’re staying, even though it’s starting to get really long. 

No murder has happened since the beginning of the storm, confirming the police suspicions that it might be a wild animal doing this. A bear wouldn’t come out during a thunderstorm, hence why no bodies have been found or anyone going missing. 

You don’t really know what to think of the whole thing. You never really experienced anything of the sort before, only ever seen it in the news, taking place in a far away city. Now, it’s really different to be a witness of it.

You don’t understand how an animal would do such a thing, especially since they aren’t known to attack humans, or… eat them. But everybody is kind of desperate to find a culprit. 

As you’re looking through your notes, you notice that you’re missing a piece of information that you absolutely need to know for your test. You would ask your friends, but none of them are in this class with you. Plus, you forgot your book so the only solution would be to go to the library. 

The place is lit up by candles and oil lamps. The power doesn’t seem to have come back here either. 

The librarian isn’t even here, so you can’t ask her for directions, which would be really useful, but you’ll do without. You go to the biology section and start searching for the book you need. It takes you some time, carefully looking through the shelves until you notice an older edition of the book. You hope what you need is in there.

You start flipping the pages to the right chapter, but you jump out of surprise and drop the book to the floor at the sound of someone else’s voice. 

“Aren’t you supposed to attend your exam?”

It’s the guy you bumped into yesterday; Jay. 

What’s weird is that you didn’t hear him at all, you could have sworn you were alone in the library. You suppose he’s a really quiet walker.

“Uh, y-yeah,” you stammer out, furrowing your brows. You bend down to pick up the book, his eyes following your movements closely. “Just had to come here for this,” you say and show the object in question in your hand. “What about you?”

He leans on the shelves beside him. 

“Didn’t feel like wasting my time back there,” he explains and you nod, not really sure what he wants exactly… It’s not like you’re friends or anything.

You can’t see much of him with the low lighting in the library, but you still catch on the way he’s looking at you intently. It makes you slightly uncomfortable, considering he’s towering over you with all his height. And Jay is very tall compared to you. 

“Is- Is there something else you wanted to ask me…?” You manage to let out, voice a bit shaky and uneasy. 

“Are you scared?” he asks casually.

He steps closer to you, and you don’t understand why you don’t step back. It’s like you don’t dare.

“What?”

“The storm. Pretty intense, right?”

Is he really interested to know if you’re scared of storms or is he playing with you? Why would he even play with you in the first place, that’s what you wonder. 

His behaviour really confuses you. It’s true that you don’t know him, but he isn’t the type of guy to just… creep girls out. Maybe it’s not his intention though?

“Oh, yeah… it’s nothing I've ever seen before,” you confess in a small voice. 

“Me neither,” Jay replies. 

You hold the book against you tighter like it’s some sort of protection, or just as emotional support. You don’t know what’s up with him, but it has you feeling some type of way… 

You feel the knot in your stomach getting tighter as he gets even closer, trapping you between him and the bookshelves. 

Yes, you’re scared, but not of the storm… of him.

And… there’s a part of you that likes it — likes the attention he gives you, the way his dark eyes look at your body. His gaze makes you think of a carnivore, a predator. 

You’re the food he was looking for. 

“It’s really loud, isn’t it?” he observes. “I wonder… if you had to scream, would anybody hear you?”

That startles you right away. 

“Jay-” Saying his name seems to catch his attention, his eyes looking directly into yours. “Stop it.”

He doesn’t break eye contact, and you’re destabilized by how long he can hold your gaze, a shiver running down your spine, making the hair on your arms stand up. 

It’s only to whisper in your ear that his eyes leave yours. 

“Stop what exactly?”

His hot breath hits the side of your neck, hearing your heart pounding in your chest, the knot in your stomach becoming heavier and heavier. Your hands clasp around your book, holding onto it for dear life as you gulp down the excess of saliva in your mouth. 

You scrunch your eyes shut when you feel his hands on your hips, fingers sneaking under the hem of your top. Your core heats up, blood rushing to your cheeks.

“What do you want?” You breathe out, opening your eyes when Jay faces you again. 

He takes the book from you, putting it back onto the shelves, not caring if it’s the wrong placement. 

“Just a little bit of fun,” he answers, “wouldn’t you like that, hm?” He slips his index finger under the band of your skirt then, pulling you closer to him, his lips only centimetres away from yours. “I know girls like you are too shy to ask for it… So I’m making the first move.” 

“No, I-” You begin, but don’t have the time to finish your sentence. 

“It’s fine, I’m gonna take the lead. You don’t have to worry about anything, pretty,” he tells you, tilting his head and pressing a light kiss to your lips. Surprisingly, you reciprocate it. He pulls his hand away from your skirt, putting it around your neck instead. “I knew you’d be into it, you’re a little freak, aren’t you?” 

You don’t know what to answer. Is there even anything you can say back to him? What’s the point of lying when he has you trapped between his large body and the bookshelves, his slender fingers gripping your neck, his lips brushing over your face. 

But would that be really a lie saying he’s wrong about you? He doesn’t know you…

He kisses you again, this time sloppier, his tongue dominating yours easily. He nudges your legs open with his knee, his other hand swiftly diving under the hem of your skirt, groping your flesh in a lewd way that keeps you out of breath — apart from the fact that his tongue is currently exploring your mouth. 

He graces the bump of your pussy with his knuckles, making your knees buckle at the unexpected contact. He rubs the pad of his middle finger over your clit, a whine escaping your throat, muffled by his mouth on yours. The moment is brief until he slips his hand into your underwear. 

You try to make him stop by grabbing his wrist, pulling away from his lips to pathetically whisper a ‘please’ that makes him chuckle. 

“Already begging for me, sweetheart?” He softly laughs, smirking at you. “Excited by the idea of a guy’s fingers in your little cunt instead of yours? Is that it?”

You frown because that wasn’t the reason why you begged him, but now that he said this… your thoughts are going into a completely different way. What’s wrong with you?

“Do you wanna know how it feels, baby? How it’s like to have your pussy stuffed by someone else’s fingers…” 

He’s not waiting for an answer as he starts stroking your bud of nerves in slow circular motions, applying some pressure to really make you feel it. You let out another whine, this time of pleasure. 

Jay then shifts down to your entrance, circling it with a lot of delicacy, but this gentleness of his doesn’t go on for long as he pushes a finger into you. You bite down on your bottom lip — the size of his fingers are in no comparison to yours. Your eyes well up in tears, little cries escaping your mouth when he adds a second digit. 

“I know, I know,” he whispers, “must be uncomfortable, hm?” You nod your head, confirming his words. “It’ll feel good soon, I promise. You’re used to the feel of your tiny fingers, it’s normal…”

When he says this, you have a hard time believing him. How could it feel good when you weren’t at all prepared for this — when it’s not what you wanted. 

He begins to move his fingers inside of you, slow and long strokes at first, circling your clit with his thumb at the same time. He curls his fingers, making a little hook, patting your sweet spot. The intrusion is uncomfortable, but it progressively gets so much more pleasurable as he thrusts into you at a regular pace. 

Tears are still falling down from your eyes, eyelashes wet and sticky, but they aren’t the result of your pain… 

“You’re pretty when you cry,” Jay murmurs beside your ear, butterflies in your stomach when he tells you this. 

He unwraps his hand from your throat to instead grab your thigh, placing your leg around his hip. You now feel his fingers way deeper inside of you, gently and deliciously stimulating your g-spot. You dare to look down where his left hand is operating between your thighs, sliding in until he’s knuckles deep into your pussy. This makes you breathless, head rolling back on your shoulders and hitting the shelves behind you. 

“Oh, my god-!” You exclaim when Jay’s ministrations bring you so close to your orgasm. Your legs are twitching, your body warning you of your approaching high.

You’d probably be more aware of his hard cock trapped in his baggy jeans, but you literally cannot focus on anything else other than Jay fingering you, hitting your sensitive spot each time he thrusts in. 

“That’s it, baby,” he encourages, moving faster. “You feel it? Huh?” He asks and you croak out a weak ‘yes’. “Tell me how it feels.”

You hate his questions — you hate them so much. He knows how you feel, but he wants you to say it, he wants you to say that you enjoy it, and… your body really does. 

“G-Good.”

“Yeah?” he breathes out, fucking your cunt with his fingers, enthralled by the little moans you let out.

“Yes,” you confirm, closing your eyes and nodding your head. “Fuck!” You curse out when you finally reach your high, grasping onto his forearm as you ride out your orgasm, your entire body shaking. 

Jay helps you by slowly rubbing your puffy clit in circles, telling you more dirty words in your ear, all said in the sweetest voice, as if what he’s doing can be described as anything sweet. 

“Good girl,” he praises, “see, I told you it’d feel great.”

He still has his head in the crook of your neck, and you frown at the feeling of sharp teeth against your skin. It’s barely there, just brushing over it, as if hesitating to act… but Jay retrieves back, looking into your reddened eyes. 

He could stop there, but he won’t — though he got what he wanted, he needs more… 

He pulls his hand out of your panties, fingers glistening in your arousal. “Open wide for me, baby,” he instructs. 

You glance at his hand, a little repulsed. You’ve never thought of tasting yourself and it’s surely nothing you’d have ever done if not for Jay. 

You then reluctantly open your mouth and he enters his wet fingers in. 

“Suck,” he adds on, expecting you to follow his orders, and you do without a second thought. 

He stares down at you while you lick his fingers clean and he slides them a bit deeper, pushing down on your tongue. The taste of yourself isn’t what you thought it’d be… It doesn’t taste much, in fact. 

He removes his fingers from your mouth only to put them in his own after. “As sweet as you are,” he grins. “Turn around.”

You hesitate for a moment, looking at him credulously, before doing what he asked you to do on trembling legs. 

“Are you…?” You say under your breath, looking over your shoulder and seeing Jay pulling the zipper of his pants down. 

“Going to put my cock into you?” he finishes your question, “yeah, I am.”

You stop breathing at his answer, sensing his deft fingers touching your thighs and hips, going under your skirt to drag your panties down. 

He soon gets his cock out of his briefs, pumping himself a couple of times before aligning his head with your dripping entrance. His right hand keeps your skirt crumpled up over your ass, laying the other one on your hip. 

“Careful, sweetheart,” he says softly beside your ear, “because this might sting a little bit more than two fingers.” He swipes the head of his cock through your sticky folds and all you can do is moan pathetically at the feeling, lewd, wet noises echoing in the big library. 

You can’t see his length even with the way you contort your head to look over your shoulder, but you’re still able to see his chest and hips moving as he pushes his cock into your pussy. Though you have no idea what he looks like, the painful feeling of your cunt getting stretched out to his size tells you he’s really big. 

And he was right. This hurts way more than his fingers, the two feelings are not comparable at all. 

“Jay-,” you cry out, holding onto the shelves in front of you till there’s no more blood in your knuckles. 

He hears you, loving the sounds you’re making because of him and the way you say his name with eyes full of tears. When he bottoms out inside of you, his pelvis flushed against your ass, he lets out a low grunt and throws his head back, closing his eyes to savour the pleasure entirely. 

You involuntarily clench around him, making him tighten his grip on your hip. He then starts thrusting into you, his cock sliding in and out of your pussy at a slow but harsh pace. Each time he bottoms out, Jay makes sure the skin of his thighs slap against your ass, the sounds almost as loud as your little moans and whimpers. 

But the storm is so intense and noisy that he’s pretty sure nobody else in the library could hear you — if there was anyone else here apart from the two of you anyway. 

Your wetness allows him to fuck his cock into your pussy back and forth, welcoming him so perfectly without any restraint. It’s almost impossible for him to not hit your sweet spot, and he reaches so much deeper when he lifts up your thigh with the hand that was previously placed on your hip. 

You don’t know how long you can stay in this position, especially when Jay’s drilling his cock into you like nothing else matters. It’s like he needs it from you, and as the pleasure only builds up in you, you start thinking you need it desperately, too. 

You’re breathing heavily, and so is he, feeling his hot breath on your neck when he tilts his head down closer to yours. You can clearly hear his breathing now as well as his deep grunts that leave his mouth every time your walls close tightly around his girth, literally sucking him in. 

“Shit,” he curses out as he pushes lightly on your back, deepening the arch of it so your ass is flushed against his pelvis. “How could I have ever missed out on you… You’re so- fuck,” Jay chokes out, not finishing his sentence, but you have a guess on what he wanted to say. 

He then kisses your neck pretty messily, but it only raises the temperature of your body, your skin boiling hot under his soft lips. He leaves a wet trail behind, going up to your ear, down to your shoulder. 

Telling him to stop isn’t even possible anymore, it wouldn’t make any sense… would be absolutely stupid when you’re so close to your second orgasm. 

As he thrusts into you, his balls slap your pussy, and the sounds are just too vulgar, but it’s honestly arousing you so much. Jay lets go of your thigh to take a hold of your jaw, turning it around so he can look at your face. 

Your mouth is ajar to let out big puffs of air, and it’s the same for him, his breathing being irregular and heavy. He didn’t think he would ever need something that badly, which is making you his, surprisingly enough. 

Making you his in whatever way possible; whether it’s by fucking you or eating you — or both. Jay doesn’t care, he just wants it. 

It doesn’t take long for your second orgasm to pass through you, arms and legs shaking as the knot at the pit of your stomach snaps. Jay feels it very clearly, your walls hugging his cock terribly tightly, bringing him closer to his own orgasm as well.

“Holy fuck,” he hisses, his hip thrusts accelerating, literally burying his cock in your cunt until he slips out. He rapidly strokes himself and cums on your ass, strings of white cum falling on you. “Oh, god…”

He stays in this position for a couple of seconds, catching his breath. He then slightly backs away, making sure to keep your skirt crumpled up over your butt, looking at the mess he made of you. 

Suddenly, you both catch on the voices entering the library, making you rush to dress up and clean yourselves. 

—-

You’re in your bedroom, studying and writing down in your notebook while lying on your bed. It’s relatively quiet in your house, hearing the TV downstairs playing and the ceiling fan above your head running. 

The ringtone of your cell phone breaks the silence, buzzing on top of your bedsheets. It’s a number that you don’t recognize, but the first digitals show that it’s a number from your area, so you pick it up. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, pretty.”

“Uh, who is this?” You ask the person on the other side of the line because you have no idea who would call you like this. They must know you.

“Take a guess,” they say, and their tone is oddly flirty. 

You frown, starting to remember where you heard this voice for the last time… And in which situation exactly. 

“... Jay?” 

He laughs at that and you can imagine the cheeky smile he’s sporting right now. 

“You got it,” he replies, “see, I knew you’d remember me.” 

You immediately feel uneasy despite the fact you’re just talking through the phone, but things have happened since your encounter with Jay.

Things such as more dead girls, all brutally murdered by this supposed ‘animal’. 

You suspected nothing until you noticed how tired looking Jay was a day or two after what happened in the library. Normally, you wouldn’t have looked at him, but you literally couldn’t get him out of your head after how intimate the both of you had been. 

Every time he was in the same hallway as you, you’d give him a glance and nothing more as you were too shy to talk to him or even look at him for too long. 

But sometimes you dared to watch him a little longer when he didn’t know you were there. 

And you saw the dark circles, the bad attitude he had with his friends, and the disdain look he seemed to give to everybody. You also saw him get in his car with a girl. You were jealous for a second, but you felt totally different the next day when that same girl went missing and that Jay was doing fine again. 

At first, it was just silly thoughts, but it was too strong of a coincidence, you couldn’t think about anything else. 

Jay’s an incubus.

“Yeah…” You say back, shoulders tense as you sit up on your bed. “How did you get my number?” 

“Asked Jungwon for it,” he simply explains. “You did a project back in highschool together. Remember?”

You do remember. You were so stressed out about it. Paired with a popular jock? You believed the teacher was against you, but it turned out that Jungwon was way nicer than you thought.

“Luckily, you didn’t change numbers.”

Lucky for who?

“Right,” you huff out, looking through your window, a shiver passing through you at the thought of Jay hiding somewhere.

“What’re you doing?” he asks.

“Uhm, just studying… Why?” 

“Wanna go out with me?” Jay proposes after a few seconds of silence. 

You look through your window again. It’s dark outside. This would be such a bad idea… 

“It’s 9 p.m. on a Thursday night,” you begin, sounding way too bitchy for his liking, “where would we go? And why would I even go out with you…”

“The park’s always open,” he adds.

“What-”

“Relax. Nothing bad gonna happen, alright?" his voice resonates through the phone, hearing a slight laugh after. "I miss you, that's all."

You bite down on your lip, shaking your head to get all of your stupid thoughts away. As much as you hate to admit it, you love hearing that from Jay. That’s all you wanted him to say since he left you in the library… tell you he needs you as much as you need him. 

But this isn’t the time for that — there won’t ever be another time anyway. 

You respond nothing and so he takes it as a yes. “Send me your address, I’ll come pick you up in 10 minutes. Put something pretty on,” he chuckles, hanging up. 

—-

The park isn’t an open space with benches and a fountain. It’s basically the woods where you go for hiking. There are paths you can follow that will all lead you to the same place at the end. 

You could have thought of something smarter, or less dangerous, but you didn’t have any time. Jay showed up at your entrance precisely 10 minutes after he hung up and you weren’t exactly ready to see him just yet. 

You had to get in his car anyway, the whole ride being quiet until you arrived at your destination. Your stomach churned up the moment you entered the woods, Jay behind you. 

Your heart is still beating super fast right now, whether it’s because you’re absolutely scared or because Jay is kissing you feverishly, it doesn’t matter. You can’t do this, and you don’t know how it might end for you if you let yourself be distracted by him. 

“Jay,” you manage to say between kisses. You push harder on his chest, making him stop from putting his tongue in your mouth. “We need to talk,” you say firmly. 

“About what?” he chuckles, diving back down to the crook of your neck where he plants wet kisses, his hand sneaking up under your dress while the other holds your hip. 

You squirm, fighting hard to not let yourself give in to his touch. 

“I saw… I saw Kazuha and you getting into your car the other day,” you confess and he backs away from your neck when he hears that, looking intently at your face. 

“And? You were jealous, is that it?” He questions, lifting one eyebrow. 

“No! I mean-,” you answer right after, thinking about what to say and how to say it. “She went missing the day after you saw her, and-”

Jay gets visibly annoyed, trapping his bottom lip between his teeth. He lets go of you, still looking at you, but not with lustful eyes anymore. 

“What? What are you trying to say, huh?” He huffs out. “That I killed her? Fucking crazy.”

Is he really guilty? He has to be. You know he is. 

“Back in the library,” you begin to say, “were you… did you intend to kill me?” You eventually say it all, breath caught in your throat as you watch Jay registering your words. 

He sighs, “why would it matter?” You frown at that, about to respond, but he steps closer to you, trapping you between him and the tree again. “Just let me take care of you, gonna make you feel so good, baby…” 

He slips his hands under your dress so rapidly that you don’t have any time to react, immediately overwhelmed by his groping and his lips all over you. 

But you get back to your senses, using all your force to push him away. You succeed to have a safe distance between the two of you.

“So you’re admitting it!? You wanted to- to do the same thing to me!”

“No,” he disagrees, his voice harsh, sounding quite annoyed. “I just wanted- Fuck!” he exclaims angrily, but it’s like he doesn’t know what to say. 

“You could have had everybody you wanted, Jay,” you state, looking him into the eyes, “why me?”

He looks back at you and you wonder how you couldn’t have seen it before… The evil. 

“Why not? You’re hot, kinda stuck-up, but I had to try it, you know,” he chuckles. “For a nerdy girl, you sure know how to take dick.”

This angers you to a point… 

“Fuck you!”

And without thinking twice, you reach down to pick up the pocket knife you hid in your boot before. 

You open it and you rush toward Jay, stabbing him in his lower stomach. You retrieve the knife a bit too hastily, resulting in you dropping it and falling down on your butt to the ground. 

Jay also falls down, holding onto his stomach, red blood dripping out of his cut onto his hands. He yells out many curses, sucking air through his teeth to appease the pain as much as he can. 

You watch him, startled and out of breath, eventually turning around and searching for your knife through the dirt and dead leaves. When you find it, you get back up and to Jay, but he isn’t there anymore.

He has completely disappeared. 

[webco-dawnn]

Winter Hc!!

~ Here are just some fun hcs about what I think the Haikyuu boys would do with you during the winter. This post isn't categorized into teams unlike my other posts, but instead just a jumble of headcanons, so I hope you enjoy! (this includes Kenma Kozume, Osamu Miya, Tsukishima Kei, Bokuto Kotarou, Oikawa Tooru.)

꒰ ୨ ୧ ◞ 。Kenma⠀.ᐟ 🐈

╭ ; Kenma normally isn't one to go out. So, now with winter rolling in, it actually gives him an excuse not to go outside without the nagging voice of his friends telling him he could be using his valuable time practicing or that he needs some sun since he is pretty pale, afterall. Though he'd probably just stay in his room all day, buried under many blankets and wearing a bunch of layered clothing to warm him up.

When you come over, he doesn't really react. He greets you with a, "hey," flashing a gentle smile before focusing back on his game. You sit down next to him, and that's when he folds. He leans over, laying his head on your shoulder or your chest, eyes glued to the screen in front of him. If you comment on how close he's gotten he'll just say, "it's cold. You're warm. Use your brain." Though his tone held no actual bite of aggression in it.

He'll let you look over his shoulder to watch him play and eventually inch closer to you as the day goes on, until he's fully in your lap, your arms around his waist. There hasn't been a single word uttered ever since Kenma told you you were warm, but it was nice. It was a comfortable silence between the two of you that never got old. Well, silent except for the music and sound effects coming from the Nintendo held between Kenma's hands.

꒰ ୨ ୧ ◞ 。Osamu⠀.ᐟ 🍙

╭ ; You beg to come over to his house, claiming it's "too cold" in yours. Osamu tries to discourage you by telling you that his annoying twin, Atsumu, will be there as well since he has no plans today, or the fact that Osamu hasn't taken a shower yet or done his laundry. He was only trying to discourage you from coming over because.. well, Atsumu was home.. he didn't want his twin brother to see how different he was in front of his significant other. But after some more begging, you finally convince your beloved boyfriend to let you come over.

When you arrive, Osamu's already got hot chocolate made for you, handing it to you after you take your shoes off. Osamu makes some good hot chocolate, which is also another reason why you wanted to come over today. After you've finished the hot drink, he asks if you want to bake cookies with him. He has enough ingredients and a shit ton of free time, so why not?

In the process, you both get flour on your faces and in your hair, cookie dough all over your hands, and stains on both yours and Osamu's cheeks from the handful of chocolate chips you two ate.

꒰ ୨ ୧ ◞ 。Tsukishima⠀.ᐟ 🍋

╭ ; You wake up to a text from Tsukishima, telling you to be ready by 11 AM with no other information. It definitely confused you, but you're used to it since Tsukishima always texted you random things like this with no other information provided.

At 11, he picks you up and, surprise, he brought you two to an ice skating rink. You had been ranting about wanting to go for a while but not wanting to go alone, so Tsukishima took this as his cue to take you ice skating.

On the rink, Tsukishima is definitely a different person. Unlike you with your carefully calculated moves, perfect, careful, precise, Tsukishima is a wobbling mess. He has an iron grip on your bicep, not even daring to separate from you for a minute. He wasn't good at ice skating at all..

Anytime you'd laugh, he'd look up at you, saying, "It's not funny." but you couldn't really take him seriously with just how cute he looked with his red cheeks and nose.

꒰ ୨ ୧ ◞ 。Bokuto⠀.ᐟ 🦉

╭ ; The energetic owl shows up at your door at about noon, a box in his hand. You obviously let the boy in, watching as he took off his shoes before quickly walking over to the kitchen counter and setting the box down. Before you could even question anything, why he's here, (not that you're complaining, just curious) what the box was, you then read the front of the box and figured out that Bokuto was here with the intention of making a gingerbread house with you.

And so the two of you spent the rest of the afternoon making the gingerbread house. The contruction part of it ended about an hour ago, but you two were still working on the decorations of the house. It didn't look the best.. but it was fun. Talking to Bokuto while making the dessert was more than enough of a perfect day for you.

It was about 2 PM when you two finally finished, two hours after you guys had started. You look over to see Bokuto with icing all over his hands, and even some in his hair, along with small candies sticking to his fingers due to the icing. It made you chuckle. You wouldn't trade this for the world.

꒰ ୨ ୧ ◞ 。Oikawa⠀.ᐟ 🌀

╭ ; You weren't surprised when you opened your phone to 12 unread messages from Oikawa, begging you to come over to his house since he was just "So cold without you." You sigh, slipping your phone back into your pocket. You felt no real annoyance toward the boy, you could never feel annoyed with him. You get ready to go to his house before he starts whining even more.

When you get there, Oikawa's face immediately lights up with a wide smile, pulling you close and kissing you all over your face. Many, many kisses littered on your lips and cheeks. After he finished attacking you with his love, he allowed you to come inside. He told you how his parents weren't home before suggesting to rewatch a movie he loved, one you've watched with him about 10 times now. You agreed, but he suddenly changed his mind and suddenly started making tons of snacks.

after 20 minutes, you two finally settle down on the couch, Oikawa's head lying in your lap with a blanket over top of him and on top of your lap. An array of snacks lay on the table as the movie started.

[kissme-withyour-cherrylipstick]

Merry Kissmas, Day 24—Christmas Eve

Arthur is pretty sure now. The events of the last three days have been enlightening.

Merlin feels it too.

He wanted nothing more than to tell Merlin that it was okay, that he had nothing to be sorry for, that Arthur wanted the second kiss too. And a third and a fourth and—

He heaves a sigh as he stands in his kitchen on Christmas Eve morning, waiting for his coffee to brew. There is no work today, but he’s going to Morgana’s Christmas Eve party tonight, which will be in the office, and Merlin will be there.

He didn’t get a chance to tell Merlin anything yesterday. It seemed far too private to say in front of anyone else, and he worried Merlin would be too afraid to meet him in his office again. He considered texting and that was how he realized he didn’t know what to say. Well. He knew what to say, but every way he could think to say it sounded weirdly pathetic. Then he started to doubt if it was the right thing to do at all.

Maybe this is just what it's like when you kiss someone every single day for twenty-three days. Maybe he would have fallen in love with anyone if he did this with them. He certainly didn’t expect to fall in love with Merlin of all people.

This is the doubt he’s been wrestling with, but somehow he knows it’s not true. Somehow he knows this is real.

He knows because of how he always looks forward to Merlin’s kiss. How he always finds himself smiling when he thinks about Merlin, which he does a lot now. The warmth that spreads through him whenever he looks at Merlin, his tousled hair, his ears, the line of his neck, his dirty shoes that are completely inappropriate for an office setting.

He supposes he’s always been a little bit in love with Merlin. But this past month has really brought it to his attention.

At a loss for what else to do, Arthur calls Morgana.

“Hey, Morgana,” he greets, “I was just wondering... is Merlin coming to your party tonight?”

“Yes, as far as I know,” she answers.

“So he hasn’t told you that he won’t be coming after all?”

“Why, is there some reason you don’t want him to come?”

“No, I want him to come. I really want him to come.”

“Is there some reason you think he won’t?” When he doesn’t respond, she continues, “Why don’t you ask him?”

“Er....”

Morgana sighs. “Does this have anything to do with the weird game you two have been playing?”

“How do you know about that?

“Gwen.”

“She told you?”

“I have a right to know when you’re making a fool of yourself.”

“I should never have done any of that stuff in front of her.”

“Oh, she told me about the ones you didn’t do in front of her.”

“Ugh. Merlin. Is there no such thing as privacy?”

“So what’s the problem? Have you fallen in love?”

Arthur is silent.

“Oh my god, you have. Oh, Arthur,” and a hint of humanity slides into her voice, underneath a thousand layers of irony and condescension. “What are you going to do?”

“I don’t know. I don’t know what to do.”

“Oh, that’s why you called, you want advice.”

“No, no I don’t want your advice.”

“My advice is simple: follow your heart. Do what it is that you want to do.”

“That’s your advice? Why?”

“Because, I’m pretty sure Merlin wants you as much as you want him and I want him to be happy.”

“You really think that?”

“Yes. For some reason, he really likes you. God only knows why.”

“Thanks, Morgana,” Arthur says, then his sincerity runs dry. “I still think this is a trap.”

She laughs.

He hangs up.

In his own shitty flat that gets shittier the longer he stays at Arthur’s flat, Merlin is also thinking about the last three days and dreading the party tonight. The difference is, he’s still thinking about it in terms of the game. There’s no way he can win, and he doesn’t want to anyway. He thinks a tie would be the most preferable outcome, but at this point, it doesn’t really matter.

Except that Arthur will be insufferable if he wins. And he’ll remind Merlin about it at every opportunity, driving the knife deeper each time. But still, he can’t seem to bring himself to care.

Let him kiss me , he thinks, brooding into his morning tea. I want him to kiss me .

He spends the day dreaming about what it will be like and planning his reaction to it. He has every intention of kissing Arthur back. He’s done that several times and nothing has come of it.

As he’s sitting there, spiraling inside his own mind, he gets a phone call from Gwen and immediately answers it, desperate for anything. “Hello.”

“Hi, Merlin, are you busy?”

“No.”

“Would you like something to do?”

“Yes, please. God, yes.”

“Wow. Okay. I’m helping Morgana decorate for the party tonight and we could use an extra set of hands. And someone taller.”

“I’ll be right there.” He hangs up, leaps off of his chair, and gets ready in minutes flat. He already has his outfit picked out: black jeans that he thinks make his arse look good and an “ugly” Lord of the Rings Christmas jumper with all four hobbits on it.

“That was fast,” Gwen greets him at the door. She’s wearing a red velvet off-the-shoulder dress with her hair pulled back at the nape of her neck except for a couple ringlets that frame her face.

“You look amazing,” Merlin says, taking her in.

“Thank you.” She looks down. “I like your jumper.”

“Thanks.” They hug, and her embrace fills him with a sense that maybe everything will be okay.

“We’re in here.” She leads him further into the building where the party will take place, in the employee break room on the first floor and the wide open space in front of it. It’s a mirror of the second floor where Merlin works and he can’t help but look at and notice all the places that look like the places where he and Arthur have kissed. The front door. The desk that looks just like his. The boss’s office to the side. The table. Against the wall. He tingles at the memories and it makes his heart hurt.

“Lance!” Merlin cries when he sees Gwen’s boyfriend helping Morgana with decorations.

“Merlin!” Lance cries, then comes over and gives Merlin a hug.

“Long time no see,” Merlin grins.

“Yes, too long.”

“Hi, Merlin,” greets Morgana, who is stunning as usual in a green dress, her glossy black hair cascading over one shoulder. She wraps her arms around him and he feels blessed by her presence.

“Wait, I thought you said you needed someone tall,” Merlin says to Gwen, glancing at Lance who is roughly the same height as Merlin.

“We could use two tall people,” she says.

“I can give you a boost and you can help me with these,” Lance says, holding up some artificial mistletoe sprigs.

Merlin looks annoyed at Gwen. “Seriously?”

“Sorry,” she winces.

Merlin shakes his head and turns to help Lance. After Lance gives him a boost and he hangs the mistletoe, he slides down in his arms and they’re left standing together underneath it, looking into each other’s eyes. Merlin blushes, then lets go of Lance, pulls away, grabs Gwen, and throws her into Lance’s arms.

“Hi,” she blinks, grabbing his shoulders.

“Hi,” he smiles, looking at her with the most loving expression.

Merlin watches as they kiss, his smile fading after a moment, wishing he could have the same thing with Arthur.

He feels Morgana’s hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry, Merlin. I have a good feeling about tonight.”

“Oh yeah? What do you know about it?”

“I know.” And there is a strange twinkle in her eye that gives him an unfathomable sense of hope.

Arthur always arrives fashionably late to Morgana’s Christmas Eve party, but tonight he finds himself impatient and eager to get there, so, after delaying his arrival as long as he can stand, he shows up less than an hour after it ostensibly started.

It appears to be in full swing; there are many people there, most of whom he knows, but there’s really only one person he wants to see.

“Hello, dear brother,” Morgana greets in her sarcastically sweet tone, coming at him from the left and putting her arm around him, a glass of what is probably champagne in her other hand.

“Hello, Morgana,” he sighs, slipping his arm around her waist halfheartedly.

“Merlin’s over there.” She points with her glass and Arthur sees Merlin’s dark hair just poking out above the heads of some other people whose faces he tunes out as he hones in on Merlin.

His palms sweat and his breathing is shallow as he makes his way into the breakroom where Merlin is standing beside a spread of Christmas desserts and, to Arthur’s dismay, is talking to Gwaine, looking very excited to be doing so.

Merlin turns when Arthur comes close and immediately looks annoyed. “Oh, of course you’re wearing a Lord of the Rings jumper. And of course it’s that one.”

Arthur looks down at Merlin’s chest and notices he is also wearing a Lord of the Rings jumper. “What’s wrong with this?” he asks, indicating his own jumper, with the White Tree of Gondor on it.

“You’re wearing that because you fancy yourself Aragorn.”

“And you fancy yourself Frodo.”

“Frodo is the main character.”

“And Aragorn is the rightful king of Gondor.”

They stare at each other in hostility for a moment, before Merlin breaks it with a smile, and Arthur has to smile back. “It is a pretty cool jumper.”

“Thanks. I like yours too.”

“Thanks. Would you like something to drink?”

“Yes, please.”

“Hi, Arthur,” says Gwaine as Merlin turns to fill a champagne flute for Arthur.

“Oh. Hi, Gwaine.”

“Looking forward to tonight?”

“Yeah, it should be fun.”

“I’ll meet you under the mistletoe.” He winks.

“No, you won’t.”

“I’m sure someone will.”

Just then, Merlin hands him his champagne. “Morgana always has the best drinks,” Merlin says. “She has some new purple... punch or something over there.”

“What’s in it?” Arthur asks.

“I dunno.”

“Is it good?”

“I dunno, is it, Gwaine?”

Gwaine takes a drink from his cup. “Very.”

“A bit of advice, for both of you,” Arthur says. “Don’t trust Morgana.”

“I trust her more than I trust you,” Merlin says.

“Oh yeah?” Arthur says, and steps closer to Merlin, who shrinks away just visibly, and Arthur fights the need to back off because Merlin is being ridiculous. “What do you think I’m gonna do to you?”

Arthur sees Merlin’s Adam's apple bob as he swallows. “I dunno. What are you gonna do to me?” He stands up straighter, practically daring Arthur to kiss him.

Arthur barely manages to tear his eyes away from Merlin’s lips. “Nothing.” He steps back and turns toward the table full of Christmas treats. He picks something up without even knowing what it is and puts it in his mouth. A biscuit.

“Well,” says Gwaine. “I guess I’ll see who else I can trap under the mistletoe.”

Merlin is surprised by how normal his and Arthur’s interactions are that night. All his anxiety melted away when he saw Arthur and they fell into their usual banter. They are inseparable all night. They eat. They dance. They drink. But still, Arthur doesn’t try to kiss him.

Merlin can’t understand why. Arthur would win. He’s got nothing to lose and everything to gain. It’s like he doesn’t want to win. It drives Merlin mad, and he’s torn between drinking as much as he can and staying sober so he can enjoy Arthur’s kiss when it does come.

The night creeps by and still it doesn’t come.

Finally, a slow song comes on and people are actually slow dancing to it. Lance is of course a great dancer and Merlin watches him and Gwen for a moment before Arthur approaches.

“Are you going to dance with me on this one?” he asks, slipping his arms around Merlin’s waist.

A spark crackles through Merlin’s body at the touch and his arms are circling Arthur’s shoulders before he can stop them. “Yes,” he hears himself say.

Arthur smiles at him as they begin to sway and Merlin can’t help but smile back as it goes on. He closes his eyes and leans his forehead against Arthur’s. They are the only two people in the world and it feels so strange but so right, moving like this.

“What’s up with you tonight?” Arthur asks after long moments stretch out before them.

“What do you mean?”

“You haven’t tried to kiss me at all. You could tie, you know.”

“I don’t want to tie.”

“Why not?”

This is the moment. Arthur is so close and Merlin could tell him everything, but as he stands on the precipice, he finds he is too cowardly.

Merlin is driving Arthur insane . They are together the whole night, so close they are almost touching, then when they do eventually touch, Merlin won’t tell him what he wants. Maybe it’s all the other people around.

He steps away from Merlin before the song is over and gives him a hard look. Merlin looks surprised, apprehensive even. Arthur looks around for an escape route, sees a broom closet, takes Merlin’s hand, and drags him in there, closing the door behind them.

“A closet? Really?” comes Merlin’s voice in the dark.

“Hang on, I think there’s a light in here.” Merlin is leaning against the wall and Arthur has to reach behind him to find the switch. When the light turns on, he’s crowding Merlin up against the wall.

“What are you doing, Arthur?”

“You have not tried to kiss me all night. Why?”

Merlin’s look of indignation fades into something far sadder until he looks so completely miserable it makes Arthur feel like a terrible person for having done this to him. His arms are crossed, protecting himself from Arthur, but he goes slack, leaning against the wall, all possible traces of anger gone. “You know why.”

All Arthur can hear is his own breathing as he takes it in. He does know why. He’s known it for days. He feels it himself. Neither of them care about this stupid game anymore. It’s gone so far beyond that, it’s impossible to even remember what that was like.

Arthur closes his eyes, then opens them. “Let’s tie.”

“Hm?” Merlin’s brow quirks hopefully.

Arthur takes Merlin’s shoulders in his hands and leans even closer. “I don’t care about the game,” he says, his voice just above a whisper. “I just want you. Let’s tie.”

Then Merlin is leaning forward and Arthur has felt his kiss before, in fact, he’s felt this exact fervor behind it, but this time it is unbound by any pretense and Merlin tilts fully into it, grabbing Arthur and holding him close, so close it’s as if he can’t get close enough, their entire bodies pressed together in the closet, and Arthur finally lets himself go too, exploring Merlin’s mouth like he’s always wanted to and it’s warm, heat spreading like fire throughout his body at every contact point between him and Merlin. He pushes forward, crushing Merlin against the wall because he really can’t get close enough.

He has to pull away for breath and to look at Merlin, flushed and disheveled and beautiful in the harsh lighting.

It is far more than Merlin ever hoped for. Even with all the assurances from his friends and his decision to just let it happen and how seemingly romantic Arthur is being, his heart soars like he can’t believe when Arthur says, “I just want you.”

It is like a dream and despite how dirty it probably is in that closet, Arthur’s kiss is pure and right and sets Merlin alight his entire body over and there is nowhere he’d rather be than between Arthur and that wall. He tastes like biscuits and peppermint and champagne and love.

When Arthur finally breaks away, he is glowing. Even the fluorescent lighting loves him.

Arthur strokes Merlin’s face with his thumb. “You are so beautiful, Merlin,” he says breathlessly. “I’m sorry it took me so long.”

Merlin swallows. “Me too.”

“Now that it’s finally over,” he says, nosing Merlin’s cheek, “I wanna take you home,” a kiss to his jaw, “and I won’t stop until there isn’t an inch of you I haven’t kissed.”

“What? You don’t just say things like that.”

“I do now.” He presses closer to Merlin and a surge of arousal flows through his body like never before.

“Oh god, yes,” Merlin breathes. “Arthur. I don’t know if I can wait that long.”

“You’ve waited this long, what’s a few more minutes?”

“An eternity.”

Arthur kisses him again and it’s the first kiss that is free from the confines of the game. It’s strong and it’s sweet and so quintessentially Arthur. Merlin is thrilled yet not surprised at all that he knows it so well.

As they duck out of the closet, saying a rushed goodbye to the party in general, Gwaine can be heard saying to Gwen, “Finally.”

[plor-bindery]

Bound: Everybody Hates a Tourist by wolfpants

As previously flailed about, my book parcel for wolf finally arrived! So I can start rambling about the things I bound for this amazing author!

First up: the sublime Everybody Hates a Tourist by @wolfpants

This fic is a delicious post-war exploration of identity, finding your place and your people, and what it can mean to break with your past. Harry’s POV is tight, flawed, and so pitch perfect. Through his eyes, Draco is someone who’s found his footing — or so Harry believes for a while. Featuring Draco doing nude modeling (a trope I too have enjoyed as a writer) and Harry trying to discover who he is beyond what he’s always been told. Amazing fic.

So of course I had to bind it!

More materials and process blathering behind the cut.

Materials: Bookcloth is wooqu from Amazon. I love this colour so much. End papers are from a pack of summer-themed scrapbook papers. The cover decoration is HTV, layered.

Process: Hoo boy, this one was so fun. Probably the first case bind I did where I felt like I was more in control of the end product! I made this back in June; I’ve done a few more since then.

Artwork is all from rawpixel’s public domain sources with the exception of the Brighton Pier lights. I couldn’t find a good public domain line drawing so…I made one? Using Procreate. I am probably too proud of it. But I loved finding little images inspired by each chapter. The sausage dog is my fave.

I also couldn’t help but put the text exchanges in era-appropriate horrid fonts. I know the text bubbles are anachronistic but I wanted to be sure it was clear who was saying what.

I leaned into the vintage seaside Brighton vibes with the drop caps.

Funny story about the colour scheme for the cover — I’d cut a test piece out of bright orange HTV because I thought I would never use that colour so it wasn’t a waste. And then I loved it? (My personal copy was the first one I made with that brighter HTV. I do like wolf’s copy better for this! My copy isn’t pictured here but it’s similar, just with brighter orange and less exciting end papers.)

Some struggles weeding the text bubbles on the back of the cover. Oh well. I figured it’s still legible.

The end bands are machine made but match the HTV perfectly, which pleases me.

Overall, this was such a delight to typeset and bind. I really adored the process of wallowing in wolf’s great words. In fact, I loved it so much I did it three more times with other binds for them. Stay tuned…

[eddiediaaz]

Hey!! I just wanted to say that your recent speak now gif set is sooo stunning. I was wondering how you managed to create that cassette tape effect if it isn’t any trouble? It’s really so pretty.

Have a great day! ✨

ahhh thank you so so much! first of all, i cannot take any credit for this effect, as it was greatly inspired by this amazing yellowjacket gifset by @thewintersoldier!!

but here's how i recreated the effect, from a cassette png (found on pngwing here), to this animated cassette effect (as seen in my speak now set):

psst: i usually always create in photoshop cs5, but for this effect you need a recent version of photoshop because it's using transform keyframes (i think cs5 doesn't let you do that, or i just don't know how to lol). i used cc 2019 for this.

sorry if this is lengthy or has too much or too little details haha, but i hope it's comprehensible! english is not my first language so i also apologize in advance for any mistakes!

I. PREPARING THE CASSETTE

so, starting with the png here:

i removing everything i didn't want on the cassette png with the brush tool by just drawing the right color over the unwanted text. for the color, i then went to image > adjustments > hue/saturation and in the red tab, i played with the hue slider to get that purple color. finally, i added some text to my liking, and this is what i ended up with:

(not necessary but: i also selected the white lines on each side with the magic wand tool because i wanted these lines to be transparent. once your selection is done, go right click > layer via cut. it will create a new layer of the cutout you just made. you just need to disable or delete the layer to make the selection (lines) transparent.)

at this point you want to have only 2 layers: the revamped cassette and the text layer. you can remove the text layer actually, and just add the title back at the end, as it is not necessary for this effect. i just like to have the visual.

if you have multiple layers, you need to select all of them (except the song title layer), right click on the png layer and click on merge layers. this will create one layer with all the editing you made on the cassette. if you think you will need to edit this later though, i would save the file as a psd before merging the layers.

II. THE EFFECT

okay, so now that you have your cassette, make sure your video timeline is activated, not frame animation, and you are ready to go.

first, you want to create a perfect circle shape around one of the reel with the elliptical marquee tool (hold shift while dragging the circle). make sure it covers the entire area that will later be rotated. make sure this circle is perfectly centered around the reel or otherwise the animation will be a bit lopsided.

then right click on this selection and go "layer via copy". this will create a layer of only that circle selection. important step: right click on that new layer and go "convert to smart object". the layer should look like that, i've renamed mine:

now if you go to your timeline and open that new smart object layer, you will see that you have 3 keyframe options. we only need the transform one.

go to the start of the timeline and activate the transform animation by clicking on the stopwatch button. a keyframe will be created automatically.

to create the actual animation, move the position of the cursor on the timeline further, i put mine at the 01:00f mark so it's easier to create the right timing.

then what you want to do is select the reel smart object layer and hit ctrl + T. a box will appear and this is how you will make the reel rotate.

to rotate the reel shape, move your cursor near the blue box on your canvas and drag it until you have rotated the shape halfway through and hit enter. another keyframe will be created and if you play your animation, the reel should rotate on itself for half a turn

move your position on the timeline to 02:00f and do the same thing: select the left reel smart object, hit ctrl + T, rotate for another half turn, and hit enter. this third keyframe should be the last one needed for the animation and you should have a full animated rotation of the reel.

play your animation, and adjust the speed to your liking by dragging the keyframes on the timeline (but make sure they stay within the same distance from each other). the closer the keyframes are, the faster the animation are, and the further they are, the slower it'll be.

then you can just trim the smart object to your animation's length, and duplicate (right click the smart object > duplicate layer) this layer the amount of times needed (i find this less finicky than duplicating keyframes), and placing them one after the other. three full turns should be enough. this is what my timeline looks like right now:

and my animation for the left side looks like this:

as you can see, we can see the little "dents" peeking through behind the animation. we don't want that! to remove it, select the revamped cassette layer (that should be under the reel smart object), and create another perfect circle around it with the marquee tool. this time make sure it's smaller than the previous one, it just needs to cover these dents.

then right click on this selection on your canvas and go "layer via cut". this will create a new layer with that selection, and all you need to do is to disable it. this is removing the information in that circle.

once you are happy and the animation works, you can just delete that cut layer. now the animation is done and looks like this:

III. SECOND ANIMATION

one you have done it on the left side, you just gotta do the same thing on the right side. you can also try duplicating it, but i found it finicky for some reason (or maybe i'm just not used to the controls of this 2019 photoshop version?).

this is what i have once i've done the same thing on the right reel:

once i am happy with the speed and everything, i want to have only one layer so it's easier to use on gifs. first, i will save this animation as a psd file, in case i want to reuse it. then i am removing the song title layer and will be flattening everything and creating frames from this animation. to do so i am using the "save" action from here.

i'm not sure why it does that, but it's creating a couple of frames where the reels are a bit offset from their position everytime there's a full circle done, so i just delete these 5-6 frames. you can also change the speed here, but by default it should be 0.05.

once you are happy with it, just turn these frames into a smart object with the video timeline again (convert frame animation to video timeline and select all the frame layers > right click > convert to smart object)

now you have a smart object that is ready to be used anywhere!

IV. FINAL TOUCHES

for my particular speak now gifset, i have multiple layers of the animated cassette on each gif:

1, bottom one - cassette layer set to the blending mode "hard light" and set to opacity 86%:

2, middle - this same cassette layer set to hard light, but with the opacity at 100%, AND with a layer mask so it's only applied to the animated reels (i wanted them to show up more):

3, top one - and finally a third layer with another layer mask because i wanted the white label and speak now area to be less see through. it's set to the normal blending mode and the opacity is at 75%

and then i just added the song title on top at 100% opacity and normal blending mode, and added some drop shadows, and tada!

there we have it, i hope this was helpful <3

[hansooyung]

hansooyung's coloring tutorial & ctiys: alma time! 🍒

hello everyone! though i've been meaning to for a while, i've finally gotten around to making my first manga coloring tutorial! i'll be going over cleaning panels and screentones, choosing base colors, and finally shading and lighting.

this will also be a color this in your style challenge, so if you're willing, feel free to post your colored panel and tag me in it!! i'd love to see all the results :)

find details under the cut! 🦋

DISCLAIMERS:

this is just how i personally color! i know for a fact that some of my other friends follow other methods and have such beautiful colorings <33

for colors specifically, i play around a LOT. if you don't like your color scheme for the time being, mess around with it! i don't use psds since i like to mess around by hand with color palettes, but maybe i'll look into it for the future.

i explain a lot just bear with me gang 🙏

TECHNICAL STUFF:

software: ibis paint x (on iphone). i use ibis since it is FREE for all phones and it worked on my chromebook as well.

while this tutorial is made for ibis paint x, everything works on other softwares except the brushes, which i've provided alternatives for below.

brushes: i will be using dip pen (hard) which is automatically included with ibis, and two other brushes i made myself which you can find here and here. for more brushes, @/bkdkdh was incredibly helpful and posted her awesome set here!

for other softwares, you can use similar brushes. dip pen (hard) can just be the default brush, while wet edges is just the default brush on lowered opacity (and more of a rectangle/marker shape?). watercolor pencil is a watercolor brush in the rectangle/marker shape as well. if you can't get the shape, you can always smudge your lines into shape as well, so don't fret too much! a bunch of people only use one brush for coloring everything (which is insane to me, personally, they are so talented!)

fun fact: the first brush listed that i made was originally called "aki tao watercolor smooth" 👍

ok here we go guys!!

STEP ONE: CLEANING THE PANEL

i think of this part as setting up the panel for coloring! usually it's pretty exhausting cuz it's all b&w but it's all worth it i swear. the panel i'll be coloring is this beautiful one of alma from chapter 2:

imgur link here (x)

a lot of people redraw their lines to avoid screentones, which is extremely helpful. however, i work on a phone and my fingers are not steady even with the stabilizer turned all the way up T~T. i do it this way, but a different (possibly easier) way may work for you!!!

your first step will be to remove all the white, giving us a transparent background to work with. THIS IS THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY I USE IBIS PAINT X.

when you upload the image to ibis, a popup comes asking if you would like to "extract line drawing". this creates a lineart of your image. click yes, and your work is like 90% done.

if you're not on ibis, you can redraw your panel, put lineart layer on screen, etc. or you can just extract line drawing from ibis and upload to software of your choice

for those of you not on ibis, i've included the line drawing here (x) if it looks black, don't worry and set your background to white.

omg i was not kidding when i said i explained a lot. ok now onto the three main steps of cleaning the panel:

cleaning background

removing screentones

repainting black lines

for cleaning the background, we're going to clear off all the extraneous stuff. this includes the text in the speech bubble, the gradient screentones behind alma, and the panel line on the left side. just use your eraser tool and go crazy! (i forgot to save the panel at this point of the coloring OTL)

for removing screentones, we're going to remove all those "dots" that mangakas use for shading. these are used to show value for b&w art, but since we're coloring we don't need them—a lot of people have really cool ways of incorporating screentones in their colorings though, and it looks amazing! i used it on nana's hand in my bnha coloring.

remove the screentones from alma's hair and jacket with your eraser tool. this will take time, but it's worth it in the end!

for portions with a bunch of lines, you can create A NEW LAYER and redraw some of the lines. that way, you can erase indiscriminately from the original layer but the lines you drew are still there. again, like i said, my hand is really shaky so i don't do it a lot, but it's extremely helpful for smaller parts where i have control! i used this on alma's jacket, and here's a screenshot of the process:

(i made his jacket purple so i could distinguish between layers easily).

it should look like this when you're done:

for the final step of cleaning, i like to erase all the things colored black (the collar and strings of the jacket, along with the back part of his hair). that way, i can color them in with dark colors and it adds to the whole look of the coloring.

i've circled the parts i'm going to erase below:

and it should look like this when you're done!

ok everyone cheer we're ready to color now!!!!

STEP TWO: BASE COLORS

CROWD CHEERS ok lets go!

this part is the most important to me, because it sets the tone for the whole coloring. i like to use three-four main colors in my colorings, and it's usually background, skintone, hair, and the secret fourth color. the secret fourth color is usually whatever color fits the character's vibe, or if the character's color is the bg, it'll be an accent color.

for example, with my nagi coloring, i used white for the hair, i had my skintone, i had blue as the main coloring vibe (as nagi's color), and black as the accent color.

for alma, i chose his main color to be red! it's the color of his hair and his jacket, so i wanted it to be vibrant and stand out. since blue contrasts red, i went for a greyish-blue shade for the background. (i went for grey rather than solely blue because then it would clash rather than complement).

disclaimer please please please take your device off night mode warm mode f.lux whatever you have. this has screwed me over more times than you may think :(

i like to make my vibrant colors closer to the right end of the color square. for alma's hair, i chose this color:

i dragged it down from the corner a bit but kept the saturation since his hair is kind of dark. we can use vibrant colors to shade it though, so don't worry!

here's his hair and the background together:

now from here, play around with skintones until you find one that matches the hair!

i usually drag around the wheel to the orange-red intersection, and have it on the lighter, more saturated side. here's the color i chose for alma's skintone.

i thought his original skintone looked a bit too orange, so i pulled the saturation back a little bit (moved closer to the left side of the square).

after that, color in his jacket with a bit darker red than hair, choose a gold color for the accents on his jacket, and color in the black parts with a grey-ish color (we will change that later).

here's the base colors!

if it looks a bit bright, don't worry! we can change that with shading. or you might just have to. accept the light.

STEP THREE: SHADING AND LIGHTING

wooo we made it!!!!!!! ok now i lied, we have a bit more of base colors to go. on a layer above the skin, color in your teeth and tongue. for pieces that have a more red feel (like this one), i like to make the teeth and the shading a more vibrant blue color. (for blue pieces, i make it a purple!).

IMPORTANT NOTE: ALL SHADING AND ALL COLORS SHOULD BE DONE ON NEW, CLIPPED LAYER.

i'll then go in and do some light shading with my wet edges brush. i'll use a darker color for hard shadows and then a lighter, more vibrant color to accentuate it.

next up we have blush! a lot of people do this in very different ways but i like to do it directly under the eyes, in a vibrant red shade. make a new layer above the skin and clip it on. color pick alma's hair and drag it to the most saturated shade (red corner). then using the watercolor pencil brush, lower the opacity of the brush and drag a line under the eyes on both sides.

make sure to erase the portion of blush that goes above the eyeline. i also added some lips for alma as you can see, and then added a red line under the eyes! this was back to the regular dip pen (hard) brush on 100% opacity. it may take a few tries to get your blush to the way you want it, so don't worry too much.

now we can start our actual shading!

i break this part up into three steps: skin shading, blue shading, and light shading (highlights?)

for all of them, think about where the light is falling and how it will look on alma.

quick interlude about brushes: i use the watercolor pencil brush for softer, bouncy looks (like blush and noses) and i use the wet edges brush for more hard lines in shading.

again, make a new layer above the skin and clip it on. (i like to have it below the blush, so it doesn't cover it). for skin shading, i take the vibrant red and lower the opacity of the wet edges brush by a significant amount (specifics don't really matter, as long as you're happy with it). i'll trace his neck, from the shadow of his face, shadows of his hair falling on his face, ears, and nose. (for the nose i used the watercolor pencil brush for a softer look).

this is what i have once i'm done!

next we have skin shading part two, where we basically make a new layer on top of our first shading, lower the opacity further, and trace outside whatever we just did to blend it in more.

i used the watercolor pencil brush since it's more softer shading meant for blending! i also added it around the eyebrows for depth.

next up we have our blue shading! this is a technique that i learned from @/bkdkdh's colorings, but adding blue as a shadow really adds to the whole coloring. using the watercolor pencil brush, select a light-ish blue shade (a bit more saturated than background color) and use it to shadow a few more areas than your skin shading. i always make sure to hit the underside of the nose, cuz i think it adds depth!

finally, to wrap up our skin shading we have our lights. i use an orange-ish yellow color, which i set pretty light to not blend into the skin. using the watercolor pencil brush, i'll basically highlight any areas opposite to where the blue was, and highlight different parts. i always highlight one side of the nose as well.

i erased the line around the nose since we now have shading there, and added a darker shade to the teeth since i felt it wasn't shaded enough.

now onto the hair!!! (guys we're almost done bear with me, skin and hair are the two main things and then you can half-ass the clothes)

color pick alma's hair color, then drag the red a bit further down to get a darker yet still saturated color. here's mine:

then, using the wet edges brush, draw lines of shadow wherever clumps of his hair fall or overlap with each other. you can have the opacity set to whatever level you want, i just went with around 90. just try to follow the natural lines and patterns of the original line drawing, and everything should work out fine.

here's how mine looks! then, just like we did for skin shading, place a layer on top and lower the opacity to around 50%. place some more shading to blend it in. you can also shade more parts with this shade for some softer shading. i actually forgot to take a screenshot of this step but you'll see it in the next one!

for our (almost) last part of hair shading, take a layer and place it below both of your shading layers. this is going to be our highlight layer! you can see it below, labeled 49%.

remember how we set alma's hair a bit darker from the corner color? now select that corner color and draw highlights in the center of each hair clump.

lightly visible but it's there!

now here i skipped around a bit bc i was having fun and forgot i was doing a tutorial, but repeat the shading (not highlighting) steps with darker colors for alma's jacket. you should have your base layer, a dark shading, and a softer shading for blending.

we're almost there guys!!!

for the pretty much final step of shading, select a light blue color and do some blue shading with the watercolor pencil brush opposite to wherever your darker shading falls (just like we did on the face). make sure to do it to both your hair and your jacket! here's mine:

now for the black portions, we're going to color the whole thing in a dark blue color. just alpha lock your layer and make a big stroke of dark blue, almost black. for our black shading, we're actually going to go lighter.

select a lighter (but still dark) color and place highlights on the base layer, then take an even more vibrant, lighter blue and place it on the very outside for highlights. a better example of this would be nagi's legs in his blue lock uniform here. then, choose a shade to apply shading to the gold accents on alma's jacket and we're done!

CROWD CHEERS!!!!!

STEP FOUR: FINISHING TOUCHES

we made it guys!!!! for finishing touches, i'll usually do background effects or text or that kind of stuff.

step one is coloring your lines. you can add a new layer and clip it to your lineart, or simply alpha lock your lineart and color directly on top. for hair i like to add vibrant blue/purple lines, along with a few red ones. for skin lines i try to do dark brownish purples, but leaving some black is good too bc it adds flavor!

i colored in the text boxes and added shadows using the wet edge feature, then added some text. for the glitch effect, i duplicated the lineart, dragged the layer below all of my colors (including speech bubbles) and then used the glitch effect with height full from ibis. if you don't have ibis, you can look into features on your software, or you can also just drag your lineart layer a bit to either side and color it in. i also applied just the tiniest bit of noise on top of everything

and there we go!!!!! we made it to the end :)

if you've read all the way til here, thank you so much! if you decide to color this panel of alma (or any other panels!) don't be afraid to post them and tag me for a color this in your style type of thing! (you can also put it in my tracked tag, #user.roy) i'd love to see everyone's works :)

here's the full timelapse: (it stalls for a bit at some times but hey we can't have everything)

[antimonyandthyme]

oscar/mark, a/b/o dynamics

“You’re not being rational about this,” Oscar says, and he sounds surprised, as if he had fully expected Mark to roll over and acquiesce.

In all the time Mark has known Oscar, he can count on one hand the instances in which they’ve butt heads. Most often they rub up against each other with mild annoyances, Hey, answer your phone quicker, this was important, easily solvable things. But this galls.

It isn’t about the offer. Not even that it’d cross every professional boundary in existence, and then throw the whole rulebook into the ocean too. But that Oscar thinks it’s the rational thing to do. Cut and dry, as cold and as clinical as you like.

Oscar’s looking at Mark as if he were a puzzle he can’t figure out. Mark swallows down the fully formed retort on his tongue, Hey, buddy, I don’t know if you’ve noticed in your twenty-something or so years living on earth, but heats aren’t exactly rational—

But that’d just sound petty. And Oscar would just blink at him in that way of his anyway, that way that meant, Why are you so upset?

Mark isn’t in the mood to explain. Definitely not in the mood to explain to someone more than half his age why he doesn’t think it would be a good idea to spend his impending heat together.

“No thank you, Oscar,” he says again.

“But.” Oscar frowns. “I’m right here.”

He isn’t posturing, that much Mark knows, as sure as he is that Oscar would rather roll his eyes than click an extra button to complain on the radio. There are no hidden layers when Oscar speaks, Mark likes that about him. And it isn’t arrogance either. He’s just being frustratingly, infuriatingly, irritatingly, rational.

So Mark has no reason being angry.

“All the same,” he says, as neutrally as he can manage, “I’d rather spend it alone.”

There’s a small, selfish lick of satisfaction at the whipcrack ripple of emotion it causes in Oscar’s expression, which then makes him feel like a giant asshole. But whatever.

Heats. Rational. Sure.

--

When did we get so old, huh, he said the last time Seb visited, and they had ended up mostly napping like two lazy cats in the sun. On a regular schedule the suppressants work fine, throw in jet-lag into the mix and they see fit to wreak havoc on his body. Migraines and loss of appetite, and the doctor had advised to just lay off during the race calendar.

Which, alright, can be done, except there’re three out of four of the yearly heats that would possibly land on a race weekend.

He detests arranging for services during a race, and spending heats alone is no longer the end of the world it once was. Uncomfortable, certainly, but much less now than when he was younger. The good thing about growing old is that you learn some tricks. You listen to your body and its needs, except when it’s fucking whinging for an alpha who’s absolutely out-of-bounds.

Saturday morning has his temperature surging, and he knows making Qualifying is out of the question. He texts Oscar a perfunctory, Good luck, make us proud, and goes to hunker down in the hotel room.

He’s prepared. The mini-fridge’s stocked, and he’s brought an assortment of toys to deal with the gnawing emptiness. It’s routine at this point. Moan and snarl and curse his existence, grow lucid enough to switch the telly on while stroking his cock and fucking himself with a toy, then back to curling into the tiniest, tightest ball in a mass of blankets, all the while sweating and blurting out half his body weight in fluids. Heave himself up to eat a sandwich. Check on Oscar’s times. Dry-heave a little while texting him congratulations. Go back to bed. Rinse, repeat.

The one bone, the one benefit of having regular heats, is that they don’t last long. By evening, Mark’s body has settled into some not-yet-post-heat-but-getting-there state. His dick is still hard, but at least he doesn’t feel the need to give himself rug-burn by tugging at it every five minutes.

Convenient, because the door-bell rings.

“Fucking hell,” Mark says, unimpressed. “What are you doing here?”

He thought he’d made himself exceptionally clear. But Oscar’s here, looking about as far from usual Oscar as Mark’s possibly seen him. Anxious, disheveled, toe-tapping nervous nonsense. Eyes-shifty, red-cheeked. Impossibly endearing.

“I have had a lot of time to think about this,” Oscar says, which in Oscar-speech means he stared into the abyss for a couple of hours thinking about nothing else. “It occurs to me that I’ve been horribly remiss.”

“You talk like an old man,” Mark says.

“I’m trying to apologize,” Oscar says, agitated. “I didn’t mean to. Offer so flippantly. As if your heat has no significance.”

There is no significance, is Mark’s knee-jerk response, but even he can see it for the lie it is.

“I… was hurtful without meaning to be. I’m sorry, Mark.”

Mark nods stiffly. He might be out of deep waters, but the ache of loneliness takes some time to dispel. Best to close the door in Oscar’s face soon before his body gets any stupid ideas. “Apology accepted,” he says.

Oscar opens his mouth. “That’s not all.”

Of course it isn’t. Oscar smells like pine and those godawful expensive vanilla candles and this is just not a very good time. “Go on,” Mark says, through gritted teeth.

“I wasn’t being truthful earlier.”

Mark blinks. “About?”

“Rationality,” Oscar says, and suddenly it’s as if he hates the word. “That was never why I offered. I thought. I thought it’d be the only reason you’d accept. If I could make you see it as something easy. You’re here, I’m here, you know? Might as well.”

“Oscar,” Mark says faintly.

“Mark,” Oscar retorts. “You get what I’m saying, right? I offered because I want to. You know. Be the alpha in your heat. Christ. Is that how people go about saying it? I don’t fucking know, mate. I just want to help you, like you’ve helped me.”

Oscar sounds as if he’s practiced this in front of the mirror. Practiced it and then gone and fucked it all up anyway, because his ears are bright red and he’s looking as if he wants the tiled hotel floor to swallow him up. He’s staring at the ground, or, quite possibly, at the line of Mark’s erection through his sweatpants.

“Mark. Could you say something please?”

“I don’t think—”

“That it’s a good idea, yeah, I got that earlier. Could I hear something honest, please?”

Oscar’s never once asked Mark for anything. Sure, manager duties aside, Mark busting an arm and a leg to pave the way for a certain career aside, Oscar’s never once asked Mark for more. And now he’s asking, heart on his sleeve, and Mark’s too worn down to say anything but—

“It’d be nice.”

Oscar whips his head up. All hopeful, like a pup promised a treat. “I—what—really?”

“Nice, and completely irresponsible of me.”

“Okay,” Oscar’s saying, and already he’s leaning in toward Mark, shuffling eagerly forward such that he’s breached the doorway. “Okay, but. It’d still be nice, right?”

"Yeah," Mark sighs. “Yes.”

Oscar takes one more step forward. Something clicks in the right direction when he places one hand on Mark’s jaw, and the other on his hip. A lock being turned in place, a scale being tipped. Something like that.

Quick on the uptake, never slow to see his moment of win, greedy, hungry, opportunistic. All traits of a good Formula 1 driver. That’s his boy.

Mark closes his eyes. Regret can come tomorrow, after the race. He pulls the door shut behind them.

[niuttuc]

I bequath upon ye mine gal. The goal is to use her ability on a spite damage creature like brash taunter, with a damage multiplier like city on fire in play to one-shot opponents

Ah yes, indigestion as a deck strategy. Mmmmh.

The first suggestion to take a look at depends on how important the fact the damage is done by Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar activating her ability. I'll start with a new thing you probably noticed, but also include two older things.

The Ride is a source of damage for your spiteful creatures AND a damage doubler all rolled in one, assuming your deck can enable Delirium fairly well (shouldn't be too hard if you already have discard to be able to cast Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar and the Cookbook too.)

Those are just X removals, though they have some more text, the important part is that they come pre-doubled, adding a layer of damage multiplication before you even start!

The next one is more specific to the exact situation your deck aims to engineer, and a bit more niche!

While there are no lessons in commander, Learning still allows you to rummage... Which discards a card and allows you to cast Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar. On its own that's pretty meh, but the card is also very useful once on the battlefield, granting lifelink to any of your spite creatures. This causes you to not only gain life when they hit people, but since Asmoranomardicadaistinaculdacar makes them hit themselves, you also gain life for that. A simple activation on a spite creature gains you 12 life, and with a simple damage doubler you immediately go up to 36 life.

While I'll generally assume you know your spite creatures better than me when making this deck, I'll single one of them out because she was easy to miss and a bit misleading...

Donna Noble not only can turn any regular creature into another spite creature (perfect if you initialize with a damage board wipe or similar), but also can keep making more to shoot one at a time as they die, acting a bit like one of the indestructible ones.

Something else that's important about her, is that unlike every other Soulbond creatures, Donna doesn't rely on being soulbonded to have her ability herself. You can just have her out alone and she won't be a vanilla creature. This is very easy to miss given that literally every soulbond creature except for her doesn't do that.

[mspaesthetic]

Tidbit: Placronym Pixelation

So you got this fresh placroynm that you don't want engraved with a sophomoric name? Not a problem. You can reject that stupid shit with a pixelize/pixelate filter.

Photoshop

First, you will have to make two more duplicates of your name text layer, so three text layers in total. One for when it's first displayed, one for the first frame of pixelation, and one for the second frame.

With your first duplicate layer selected, go to Filters>Pixelate>Mosaic..., which is a terrible name for it, but hey, I'm no Photoshop developer. Set the cell size to 11.

For the second duplicate layer, set it to 14.

GIMP

Pretty much the exact same steps as in Photoshop, this time the filter is located under Filters>Blur>Pixelize...

I would suggest right-clicking on the text layer and choosing Composite Space>RGB (perceptual) instead of the default (Auto), or going to the top-right corner of the Layers tab and switching the group of blend modes from Default to Legacy. Basically, doing so will make the semi-transparent pixels as dark as they are in Photoshop, otherwise they will appear too light.

Check out the read-more link below for bonus information on easily animating the name being typed out in Photoshop.

ADDENDUM

Typing animation (Photoshop)

Photoshop's frame animation timeline makes doing this a breeze. First, add a layer mask to your text layer. This will add a white box next to the layer's thumbnail.

With that layer mask selected (click on it and it will be highlighted in the layers tab), use the marquee tool to make a rectangle selection around the text, then use the paint bucket tool to fill it in with the color black. This will make the text invisible until the layer mask is moved.

Go to Window>Animation if you do not already have the animation timeline open. Click on the little sticky note icon to duplicate the first frame. In newer versions of Photoshop, you will probably first have to click on a button that reads "Create Frame Animation", and the duplicate frames button icon is the "+" in a little square.

Making sure you still have the layer mask selected and not the entire layer, use the move tool and arrow keys to move it all the way to the right, revealing the text on the second frame you've just made. Don't move it too far off now.

Move the typing cursor layer to the right as well, except you don't have to move it all the way at the end, only where it will be last seen.

Make the typing cursor layer visible on the first frame, and not visible on the second.

Select the first frame the animation and click on the tween button. This will add all of the frames in between the first and the second one for you. Make sure you only have "Position" checked under "Parameters". For the numbers of frames to add, here's a neat trick for finding the right amount: count the amount of letters in the name. "ZOOSMELL POOPLORD" is 16 letters, so add 16 frames.

Most of the work is already done, though there might be a couple frames that will need some minor tweaks. Just use the move tool and arrow keys again to finetune the layers' positioning.

This is why it was important to not move the layer mask too far to the right away from the end of the text. Tweening the position spaces it out linearly, evenly, so the farther away the end goal is, the more space each frame will use. Thankfully the font this panel uses is mostly monospaced, and I got a little lucky with my positioning, so I needed to only adjust three or four frames. Way less tedious than having to create each frame of animation myself, at least.

To change the frame delay (the time duration each frame takes up) of the newly created frames, click on the first frame you want to retime, hold down the Shift key, and then click on the last frame. This will make a selection spanning all frames in between. Click on the little dropdown arrow and select 0.1 seconds (100 milliseconds).

Here's the original panel:

And here's my recreation:

Here's the PSD, too.

[whatislovevavy]

10. As You Wish

Jake Seresin x OC (Caledonia Hughes)

WC: 5.8k

Masterlist  Previous Part   Next Part

Warnings: swearing, smut (18+), some angst but don't worry ;)

AN: Apolgies for the wait, but here it is enjoy :) Thank you @sebsxphia for the encouragement to write this story when it was in development, it means the world <3 Also a big thank you to @royallyprincesslilly for the design of the divider 

Please consider leaving a comment, a tip, or reblogging, leaving likes doesn't do anything on this hellsite. It helps with motivation when writing and the tips help since I’m between jobs at the moment :)

All of my writings will be added to my writing side blog @sophs-writing-nook 

These characters, except for Caledonia and Ella, are obviously not my own. This is an 18+ fanfic, so minors scoot pls. You are responsible for the media you consume. Do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate this fic without my explicit permission as it is my own creation. 

Jake could feel his breath settle into the deepest part of his lungs, like a layer of fog sinking into a valley. 

You looked just as beautiful as the day he last left you. 

"What are you doing here?" 

His heart ached at your apprehensive tone.

He swallowed down the lump in his throat, trying to stop any tears from flowing down his cheeks. 

"I-I, uh" 

You looked at him with that same sense of fear that he never wanted you to view him with. 

He swallowed, diverting his eyes.

Your gaze was too much for him. Too heavy for him to meet. 

"I needed to see you."

Your eyebrows rose. Arms crossing as you bit the inside of your cheek, scowling.  

"Why?" 

He swallowed again, his throat almost closing as your steadily piercing gaze met his own.

He tried to take a step towards you.

You took one to match behind you. 

The sight made his heart clench. 

Every smile he brought to your lips, every sweet laugh, and adorable snort was canceled out by the sight. 

A tense silence settled between you both, disrupted only by the soft buzz of the overhead parking lot light. 

You sighed, toying with the strap of your purse. 

"You said," you licked your lips, "we shouldn't do this anymore. I'm sorry. What did you mean by it?"

His shoulders tensed as he took in your tense jaw and eyes that were now as sharp as hypodermic needles. 

"I said that-" 

"You texted me. You didn't even have the decency to say it to my face."

He took a deep breath in, eyes full of remorse. 

"Please hear me out, Caledonia. I thought- I thought I couldn't give you what you deserved. I-I screwed up." 

Your eyes fluttered in disbelief, his tone nothing like you ever heard. 

He ran a hand through his disheveled hair, letting his glassy eyes meet yours, almost missing the slight shift in your demeanor. 

"I don't… I don't understand." 

You swallowed as you saw him take a step closer to you.

You stood still and let him, the soft lapping of waves along the shoreline and high pitched ring of the overhead parking lot light caressing your ears. 

He took another step towards you, his heart warming at the fact you didn't flee. 

Perhaps all was not lost. 

"It's not an exaggeration to say that these past four weeks without you have been some of the worst weeks I've experienced in my entire life. And, " he took a few tentative steps closer, swallowing. 

You put a hand softly on his chest to stop him from coming any closer, and his trail of words.

You swallowed, shaking your head, moving your eyes up to the light polluted night sky, and biting your lip as you thought of the right words to say. 

"Do you realize what you put me through? You don’t get to come here and act like I’ll always be the one desperate and waiting for you,” you sighed,” you dropped me after your job was done. Did you only want me so you could say you could take someone's virginity and brag about it later? Was that all I was to you?"

"Caledonia, no-"

"You made me think, " you scoffed, "that there was even the smallest chance that you cared about me… wanted me, and that's more cruel than anything I could ever do to you."

Your voice held something foreign as your eyes teared and your hand retracted; venom.

"Do you have any idea the mental state you put me in? How much hope you gave me? Or were you too busy thinking about the ego boost you'd receive bragging about how you took the unwanted girl's virginity to think about it?”

Your snarl made his heart clench.

Jake could feel the tears start to build up, his voice thick and shaky. 

Unwanted?

"I -I never thought of you as being unwanted-" 

"Really? You're telling me you had nothing to gain from screwing the hard to love, mentally decrepit, overweight girl? Huh? Is that why you came to my defense at the retirement gala? To get brownie points to screw me more?"

Your voice was thick with frustration, hot tears flowing down your soft cheeks as you angrily wiped them away, scolding yourself for crying in front of him. 

“No, No, that was never my intention-”

“God, Jake, why are you here? Really here? Because it can’t be for me.”

As soon as the words left your lips, it clicked. 

Like the final piece completing a puzzle. 

Jake’s heart clenched at the scoff that left your lips.

“You’re only here for you. You did this whole thing for you. Not for me, you selfish bastard.”

His skin crawled at the seethe and frustration thick tone, your rage boiling over. 

“Caledonia- you’re right. I did it for me, but not in the way your thinking-”

You scoffed, “Jesus, I should have listened to Phoenix."

You put your shaking head into your hands, raspy breaths coming through the cracks between your fingers. 

His lip quivered, “I did it, because I wanted you and I didn’t know how to be with you.”

Your breathing paused, the ringing prominent in your ears as you took in each letter of each heavy word passing his lips. 

“Jake, don’t bullshit me. You could have any girl you want, so why did you have to play with me like this?”

Your strained, wounded voice broke him.

He swallowed and continued, "I did it because it was the only way I knew how, you’re so smart and sweet, you deserve someone who’s just as smart as you, just as sweet and kind… someone who deserves you.”

Your eyebrows furrowed.

He let out a shaky breath, “I, um, I’m not good with relationships. I’ve only ever had one serious relationship in my life and it… didn’t go well, in the slightest.”

“I’ve been doing what I’ve been doing for years…”

Sleeping together with no inent of remembering their name. 

Skin on skin with no intent to remember their softness. 

The way their whispered words of pleasure met his ears. 

It all made your skin itch in the moment. 

“...Because it was safer. I-I’m not good at this,” he scoffed, aggressively running through his already disheveled hair, “ I fly multi-million dollar jets at the speed of sound and I’ve never been scared once to do it. But being with you? Intimately and wholly? That scares me. It always has. And I didn’t know why until tonight.”

He took a shaky breath.

“Because if someone as good as you can love me, then I have something to fear up there,” your glassy eyes watched as he languidly pointed up towards the inky, onyx night sky. 

“I have something special to lose if I burn in, and that’s you. Since I saw you in your jeans and X-files shirt working Penny’s bar top for the first time, with your cute ponytail and sweet smile, it’s been you. And I’ve been too stupid and blind to see it. ”

He swallowed, eyes teary, gently reaching out for your hand. 

"Please, Caledonia, I- I can't let you go again." 

Your glassy eyes shot from his own to his calloused hand cradling your soft one.

You knew what he was asking. 

"Jake, I… I can't."

He was already so close, your eyes moving from his pleading eyes to his lips, and back to his eyes. 

You hated how this man held the power to make your resolve crumble to a fine powder. 

"Please, just one chance to make it right." 

You swallowed, almost tasting his natural, soothing scent as a soft ocean breeze brought it to your senses.

"I already gave you a chance, and look where it got me,” you whispered to him, fighting with yourself, unable to push him away. 

Jake softly bit the inside of his lower lip. 

Your body tensed as he gently lowered himself to the asphalt, his hand still softly holding your own.

You don't know why you let him keep hold of your hand, but you couldn't stop him even if you tried. 

You'd never seen this man plead, much less get on his knees for something. Or someone.

The sight almost made you wince as you imagined how the small pebbles would dig into the skin of his bare knees.

Almost. 

He swallowed, voice thick. 

"Answer me this one question, and I promise if you say no, I'll never step foot in the Hard Deck again and you'll never have to see me again." 

Your breathing rattled in your throat. 

His jaw tensed, eyes gleaming with bubbling tears in the overhead parking lot light. 

You looked so beautiful from his place on the asphalt, like a man begging for forgiveness from a goddess. 

The copper shine of your chestnut highlights almost forming a crown around your head. 

"Have you ever seen me in your life?” 

Your eyebrows furrowed, lips still painted into a frown. 

"Because everywhere I go, I see you. In the blue ocean that matches your eyes. Whenever I drive by Francisco’s, I taste the raspberry-pistachio gelato you love. I can barely drive by your campus without thinking of how smart and talented you are. When I go to the grocery store, all I think about is how I want you there with me… to pick out what we want for dinner, to argue about what kind of bread to bring home together…How’d you be able to explain what each chemical on the food label would do and how you would do your ecstatic hand movements you always do when you explain things you love. Every time, I see a woman smile or laugh, I can’t help but think… smiling and laughter look so much better on you. I can barely listen to Fanboy talk about Star Wars without thinking about how much you love the originals more than the prequels. Every time I so much as walk into my closet, you’re there. And… I should have been more honest with you. About everything." 

He took a breath, licking his bottom lip. 

"That night I came to pick you up for the retirement ball…you looked like the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. And when we went to Pleasure of the 3rd Kind? I told Myrtle that we had been together a year. I always told myself it was for the discount, but I never gave a shit about the discount. I just wanted to be with you."

You could feel your lungs constrict at the words passing his lips, paralyzing you in place.  

"And that day you asked why you’re my favorite bar maid? It was never because of the booze you give me," he scoffed. "It was always because of the way you looked at me, and how much I craved being with you… I defended you at the ball because you deserved to be defended, you’re too beautiful, kind and strong to be treated that way by anyone. And when you took care of me and made me beef stew when I was sick? That made me realize how deep I was in with you.”

He took a pause to swallow and gather his rampant thoughts.

“And, I know your mental health and weight have made you think that you’re hard to love. But the thing is… you were never hard to love and those qualities never deterred me from loving you."

He watched your glassy eyes as he licked his bottom lip.

"Falling in love with you was as easy as kissing you and falling asleep next to you. Hell, it was easier than breathing, easier than telling my heart to beat."

Tears streamed down your face as his pleading eyes continued to bore into yours.

“I should never have done what I did to you and, if you’ll let me, I’ll spend however long it takes trying to make it right, even if it takes me the rest of my life to do so. But I can’t leave you again.”

His voice shaky and thick, “I can’t. I love you too much to let you go again.”

A hitched breath passed your lips as your bottom lip quivered. 

Your voice matched his in lack of stability, “you love me?”

Jake nodded, keeping his glossy gaze on you. Both hands now cradling one of your own. 

“I do, Caledonia…I’m so sorry that I was too stupid to see it sooner. I understand if you don’t feel the same given…everything…but you deserved the honesty and an apology.”

You took a shaky breath, fluttering your tear soaked eye lashes, diverting your eyes to the cracks in the asphalt, your soul feeling like a whirlpool in the core of your chest.

"I see you too. Everywhere I go. When I serve Corona’s and whiskey neats…hear that stupid Berlin song at Penny’s,” a small, brief smile that didn’t fully reach your eyes, “when I put a damn bra on every morning… grade the freshman’s organic chem tests, play fucking cards with Amelia, make my family’s beef stew,” You sniffled, wiping away tears that were less saturated with malice and rage. 

“As much as I hated what you did, I couldn’t stop thinking about you and the… things we did together. It always felt like more than it was and I ignored it. Didn’t bring it up because I didn’t want to ruin what semblance we had of being something more than just… whatever it was we were.” 

Jake could feel tears running down his face, he wiped them away, feeling a smile start to blossom. 

“We were so stupid.” Your tear strained voice crackled against his ears. 

“No, No you’re not. You never were. I’m the one who was a complete fool and let you go. I was a coward, and I shouldn’t have run away from you.” 

You bit the inside of your lip lightly as Jake’s eyes pleaded with your own.

Your lip quivered, blinking away tears.

He watched on, eyes never leaving yours as you carefully stepped towards him, silently encouraging him to rise up. 

“Caledonia-

You smashed your lips against his, cradling your hands along his jaw and the back of his neck. Jake almost stumbled backward before gaining his bearings. 

The lack of touch from the other ignited a raging fire inside your souls that was only enouraged by the other. 

A new found established love taking hold. 

You separated with a soft gasp.

“I love you too, Jake,”

A bright, boyish, tear filled grin took over his face, eyes bright with reinvigorated life. 

You loved him. 

And he loved you.

He was given a last chance, and he would be damned if he was going to waste it.

His lips melded with yours as he gently guided your back onto the hood of your car. 

"God, I missed you so much. I'm never letting you go again." 

His desperate, mumbled words made your heart skip a beat. 

“I missed you too, promise me you won’t do something this rash and stupid again without talking to me first.” You mumbled against his lips. 

He nodded as if in a love-drenched haze. The only thing he could focus on was the feeling of you with him again. How your soft lips melded so easily with his own. 

He gently pulled way, letting his nose bump yours with a grin. A small giggle passed your lips as tears stained your cheeks. 

"Now we're even." His hushed tone made you smile. 

A bright grin took over your features as you gently scratched at the hair at the base of his skull. 

"We should go inside,” his whispered tone made you shiver.

You nodded, cerulean, teary eyes on his gleaming, jade ones, “I need you, Jake. I love you.”

His thumb caressed your cheek as tears of joy fled down your soft skin. 

“I love you too, sweetheart,” You smiled at the soft kiss he placed to your lips. 

He hastily guided you on unsteady legs towards the door of the Hard Deck, littering kisses along your neck and face as you searched for the right key. 

You huffed in frustration as he made the task infinitely more difficult. 

He smirked into the flesh of your neck, squeezing your waist as you turned the lock with a click. 

As soon as you both were inside with the door locked behind you, his lips were back on yours.

He couldn’t get enough of your taste, having spent far too much time away from it to be able to have it taken away from him again. 

A squeal left your lips as Jake grabbed the back of your thighs, wrapping them around his hips and stumbly traversing the bar illuminated only by the ethereal glow of the jukebox, red tinged light of the exit signs, and dull city lights across the bay. 

“Jake, slow down, I'm not going anywhere,” you softly said against his lips. 

He stopped his movements, letting your breaths mingle together as he pulled away. 

Your glossy eyes met his own. 

The thrumming of your heart resonating in your ears. 

"You mean that?" 

You swallowed at his heavy, whispered tone, nodding. 

Jake gently brought his lips back onto your own, letting your soft flesh meld with your own, his tongue entwining with your own. 

A whimper passed your lips as he let you down onto the soft felt of the pool table. 

"God, I love all the sounds you make." 

He whispered tenderly, his eyes full of love and warmth. 

“Sound so fucking beautiful,” he groaned as he stripped your shirt off between heat-filled kisses. 

Kisses filled with teeth and tongue, an act to get as humanly possible in the moment. 

He took a pause to admire your bra-clad breasts, his gleaming eyes meeting yours in silent permission in the distant city lights off the water. 

You nodded feverishly. His nimble fingers undoing your lacy, navy blue bra. 

His lip quirked at the sight, feeling at the lacy material.

He missed you and your navy blue. 

The sight of your bare mounds against the dim light made his cock stir, his calloused hands came up to tenderly feel at your peaks, letting them harden against the calloused pads of his fingers. 

A soft heavenly noise left your lips at the contact; a mewl. 

He never knew he could miss a sound so much. 

His tongue came down to caress your flesh, littering open mouthed kisses along your neck, sucking bruises along your throat down to your breasts.

You keened, arching your chest into him as he took a peak into his mouth, gently sucking and biting at the sensitive nerves. His hands grasped at your hips, working at unzipping your jeans. Your nails dug into his cotton-clad shoulders spurring him on, sliding your jeans down your soft, beautiful thighs to the hardwood floor. 

His breath caught in his throat at the sight of you bare except for the navy blue lace panties.

“You’re so beautiful, too good for me, Lass.”

Your heart warmed, a blush taking over as you preened against the soft felt of the pool table. 

You watched as he stripped himself of his shirt and pants, feeling your throat dry at the sight and core clench. 

Your words died on your lips as he gently leaned down and placed a full-hearted kiss against your lips, as if you were his only supply of oxygen. 

Your nails scratched against his abs to his pecs to the back of his neck, relishing in each groan that passed his lips.

“Jesus, sweetheart, I love when you feel me up, touch me.”

You giggled against his lips, “I love feeling you,” you reached down for his hardened bare cock that was settled at the edge of the table and between your thighs, “and kissing you.”

“Mhm, I missed that too. But I missed one thing almost as much. “

He gently retracted from your touch and settled on his knees. 

You could barely meet his eyes over your lounged form, settling your body on your elbows observing as Jake kneaded your thighs, stomach and breasts, brushing his thumbs along your nipples. 

A soft sigh passed his lips, as his dilated pupiled eyes took in each inch of exposed flesh. 

“I miss tasting you, feeling you cum against my tongue, miss hearing all the pretty noises you make for me… have always made for me.”

You shuddered as you kept your eyes on him as he gently ran his nose along the crease between your flushed, soaked folds, taking in a deep, full chested inhale. 

He could feel his cock throb at your smell.

“So sweet, Lass, always so sweet n' pretty,” he gently ran his forefinger along your flushed folds, separating them to see your engorged clit. 

“Fuck, you’re so good for me.”

A yelp left your throat as he licked a broad, perfect stroke up your cunt, quickly covering your mouth with your hand. 

"Oh, Jake, you don't have to do that. It's a little overgrown down th-," you whispered.

"Baby, I don't mind…I have a lot of time to make up for. God, I missed your gorgeous pussy and beautiful ass," he growled, making you shudder as he kneaded the flesh of your backside.

He sighed as he took another broad lick up your cunt.

"You're so fucking sweet… don't know how I lasted so long without your taste." 

Your face reddened by the second as he kept his dark, rainforest green eyes on yours. Your nails dug into the back of his head, keeping him in place as he continued to savor each drop of essence from your flushed folds that rivaled that of ripe peaches. 

He smiled around his extended tongue as your hips bucked involuntarily, letting your gently rub your hips against him. 

His hands squeezed at your hips to keep you steady as he sucked at your clit. 

“Oh, fuck,” you gasped, letting your body lay back onto the table. 

Your body was just as responsive, if not more, than the last time he had you. 

“God I love it when you ride my tongue, always been such a good girl.” 

You whimpered as he returned to your sopping cunt. 

Your eyes rolled back as the sensations flooded your brain, reaching out for anything to grip and hold. 

Jake’s hands reached for your own, intertwining with them.

I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.

He placed his strong forearms over your tummy, keeping your hands and lower body still to his ministrations. 

“Oh, fuck, please don’t stop, baby,” you cried out into the empty bar as he gave your clit a harsh suck, letting it go with a soft pop. 

He loved watching you from here, taking each stroke of pleasure he could give you. 

Jake took his hand from one of your own, letting it run along your flushed entrance, before gently settling at your hole. 

You moaned as he put two of his fingers inside you, stroking that piece of salvation imbedded with-in your velvet walls. 

“Jake, please,” your manicured nails dug into his scalp to keep him in place, trying to find enough strength to rub your eager cunt against his welcoming mouth. 

But his hold on you was too strong, he had you open and ready for whatever he wanted to give you. 

He could feel your moans and mewls resonate through your body, your thighs twitching and your walls choking his fingers. 

“Come on baby, just a little more for me,” he growled against your cunt. 

The squelching and feel of your cunt made it hard to think straight as he helped push you over the edge. 

“Fuck, please don’t stop,” you wantonly mewled, “I’m so close.” 

He rubbed that special spot inside you with more vigor, needing to bring you to your release. 

He paid attention to your clit, lapping and sucking at it diligently, chasing each whine that spilled from your throat that told you you were close. 

“Fuck, baby, Jake, sweetheart, please more.” 

You couldn't help your thighs from shaking in his iron grasp as he consumed your cunt like it was his last meal on earth. 

With that he gave one last, perfect suck at your clit, making your eyes clench shut and tremors flood your body. 

Whines and moans spilled from your throat as you came down from your high, the man between your legs continuing his onslaught, cleaning up every last drop of your essence as you whimpered and mewled. 

He gave one last soft, broad lick up your core before placing a soft kiss to your still sensitive clit. 

A soft sigh of amazement passed his lips, his eyes staying on your own. 

You softly caught your breath, letting your eyes meet his. 

"I-is something wrong?" 

He scoffed, shaking his head. 

"Nothing in the slightest, Caledonia. I just… really missed watching you cum…Such a good girl… so fucking pretty when you cum, could eat your pretty, little pussy all day.”

A bashful smile broke out across your lips, matching his, as his sweet, sinful, soft, desperate voice met your ears. 

"Can't wait to feel you around my dick, Lass."

You bit your lip, admiring him as he rose up, running his broad hands along your thighs and stomach. 

His eyes met yours in a silent question

“Penny has birth control," your wispy voice made him smile.

“I just need to feel you,” you whimpered, rising up on your elbows, giving him those same innocent, sweet eyes like he didn’t just consume your cunt like it was his last meal. 

His breathing was heavy, letting his cock nudge at your entrance. His eyes meeting yours, silently asking. 

You nodded feverishly.

He kept his loving gaze on you, leaning in to meet your lips, swallowing each sigh and whine as he pushed his thick cock into your molten cunt. 

“Shh, it’s ok Caledonia, doing such a good job for me, being such a good girl.”

Jesus, you felt just as tight as the first night he had you, he thought. 

He littered kisses along your neck and back to your lips as he let you adjust to his dick. 

“Fuck, you always feel so perfect,” he groaned against your lips. 

You whimpered, “I love feeling you inside me, how thick you are. Please move Jake, I need you to move,” you pleaded with teary eyes. 

Who was he to deny you?

He smiled, placing a soft kiss to your plush lips. 

He rose up to his full height, “God, you're so fucking gorgeous.” 

His words made you clench around his cock and feel a wave of desperation you only felt for Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin. 

He looked down to where he was connected to you, letting his thumb rub tight circles onto your clit as he gently thrusted into your cunt. 

His eyes clenched shut as he savored the exquisite feeling of your velvet walls choking his weeping member. 

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he groaned, wrapping your legs around his waist and leaning down.

Chest to chest.

Heartbeat to heartbeat. 

His glassy eyes stayed on your own, and your blushing cheeks and beautiful parted lips. 

A sharp whine left your throat as he nailed that perfect spot inside you. 

The slapping of skin that came with his maintenance of tempo filled the Hard Deck with an erotic ambiance paired with your sweet moans and the squelching of your cunt. 

“Jake, please,”

A whine left your throat as his hips moved more diligently, his head laying at the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent and softly biting at the flesh. 

“Oh, fuck, please, you feel so good, right there!” 

He put all of his weight into each thrust into your cunt, hitting that same little spot inside you over and over again. 

"God, I love you so much, you and your perfect little pussy,” he groaned out, feeling the rubber band in his core stretch. 

Your lips parted as a silent scream passed through your lips, incognitable noises spewing from your perfect lips stroking his cock and stoking the flames of his love for you. 

Tears welled in your eyes as the intensity of your orgasm paired with his words made your heart skip a beat.

You gasped for breath as his lips met yours, swallowing each overstimulated whine he pulled out of you as he continued to savor each flutter of your silken walls. 

He hissed as your nails scratched and clutched at him as he found his release with a deep groan, pulsing his essence into your welcoming cunt. 

"I love you too, Jake" you hoarsely whispered. 

But it was still soft and sweet as honey. 

Jake lifted his head from the crease of your neck, his glassy eyes meeting yours. 

A genuine grin consumed his features as he caught his breath.

He leaned in, letting his nose rub against yours, his smile widening as your giggle met his ears.  

“I love you so much,” he whispered, eyes full of love. 

Your breath hitched. You could still feel his cock inside, leaking his seed into you. 

“I love you too, Jake, so much,”

He let out a soft sigh as if a weight was removed from his chest. He brought his lips back to yours as he gently pulled out, swallowing your soft sigh. 

You could only focus on his mouth on yours, his soft touch, the way his natural smell brought you so much peace and comfort. 

“You know, I always wanted to do the dirty with you on this table. Thought about it everytime I saw you serving drinks over here.”  

You clenched around his length, “Me too,” you whispered against his lips. 

His cock twitched in a mixture of both of your releases in your still dripping cunt. 

“Really?” he purred, “the thought of ruining this table and having all our friends play pool with it tomorrow night get you hot and bothered, sweetheart?”

You nodded, not trusting your voice. 

He chuckled darkly, “I thought so sweets, can feel you squeezin’ me so tight at the thought… such a needy, little Lass.” 

“I’m not needy, Jake, you’re the one that came back to me, remember?” 

His smile widened, a chuckle passing his lips.  

“Maybe I’m just as needy as you are sweetheart, nothing wrong with being needy, especially when we’re both here. I love taking care of you, Caledonia.”

He gave you a sultry grin, before bringing his lips to yours, letting your kiss him in a soft but strong kiss, like waves licking along the sides of an adrift row boat causing it to rock.

He gently pulled out, much to your protest, and gently turned you around on the pool table. 

You sighed softly, brain still fuzzy from your previous high. 

Jake covered your body as he gently thrusted into your molten core, a soft moan leaving your throat. His head nestled in the crook of your neck and hands placed on each side you, intertwining your fingers together along the felt of the table. 

Each sigh from his lips caressed the soft flesh of your neck, as he savored each inch of your body with his hands and cock. 

His gentle thrusts hit your senses like lightning to a rod of copper. 

You let your eye lids drop close, focusing on the soft, comforting feeling of him around you and his steady thrusting into your weeping pussy. 

Mewls and moans left your lips as he softly bit and nipped at your tender flesh, taking your earlobe between his teeth as he continued to pummel your cunt at a faster pace. 

Your body shivered at the growl that left his throat as he gave a particularly deep thrust right into that perfect, little spot that made you putty in his hands. 

"You gonna cum, sweetheart?" 

His gravelly, exertion ridden tone made your core clench around his dick. 

You could only mewl and nod pathetically, feeling him smile into your neck.

He gently guided your head to face him as he littered kisses along your neck, sucking pretty magenta hued blotches onto your soft skin. 

"Look at me, honey," you let your glassy eyes flutter open as he split you with his cock with each diligent thrust. 

"God, you're so fucking beautiful, I love taking you apart like this."

He gently squeezed the base of your throat, keeping your head towards him. 

His lips smashed against yours, swallowing each sigh and cry that threatened to leave your lips as you felt the coil in your belly tighten impossibly so. 

He groaned as he felt you twitch against him and around his thick cock, your nails digging into the back of his head in a delicious friction that made his spine tingle. 

You whined as his lips left yours, his forehead leaning against your own as he put his entire lower body into each perfect thrust.

You whimpered ahsinst his lips as a deep, gut-punch groan rattled against your neck and senses, feeling his release paint your walls. 

He swallowed each one of your whimpers and moans as he gently thrusted into your heat, feeling his engorged member become more sensitive. 

He caught his breath, letting his eyes clench shut as he savored the feeling of your walls holding him like a vice. 

He littered kisses along your shoulder, neck and cheek, bringing your lips back to his, relishing in each giggle that passed your lips. 

“I mean’t what I said. I can’t leave you again and I’ll do whatever it takes to make it up to you.”

You blushed at his desperate, sleep gravelled tone, turning to face him in the soft light, “I think you’re off to an excellent start, cowboy,” you whispered, letting out a soft giggle like his dick wasn’t still spent inside you. 

“I’ll be on my hands and knees for you, baby,”  he nuzzled his head into your neck and stole a kiss from you. 

“Mhm, that does sound appealing. She missed you down there, ya know…”

 You bit back a smile, feeling him laugh into the back of your shoulder. 

“I’ll be sure to explain my absence to your pretty, little friend down there,” he gently rubbed at your clit, “Let’s get back to my place.”

You turned to face him, eyes warm but tired. 

“I want to stay here for a bit, just to feel you. I missed you… a lot” 

He nodded, placing a kiss to your shoulder, “As you wish, Caledonia.” 

His hushed tone made you smile. You relished in the tender feel of his hands intertwined with your own, his plush lips, and soft, warm skin encompassing yours as the dim city lights across the bay and the warm glow of Penny’s beloved jukebox illuminated his love-filled embrace. 

Taglist: 

@marvel-hotchner @nemesis729 @a-lil-bit-nuts@justagirllivinginaghibliworld @mizzzpink @themusingofagothicsoul @mayhemmanaged @sebsxphia @potato-girl99981  @a-beaverhausen @withahappyrefrain @hangmans-wingman  @callmemana @joalslibrary @peachiicherries @whiskeyswriting @entertainmentgal8 @jkbindigo11 @princess76179 @clancycucumber230@teacupsandtopgun@chaoticassidy @superskittles @cherrycola27 @cheekymcgrath @h-ngm-ns @emma8895eb @djs8891 @novastories @urmom-999 @taytaylala12 @zombicupcake3 @catsficrecs @abaker74 @kmc1989 @hangmanshoney @caidi-paris @i-wanna-be-your-muse @shara-ne @memeorydotcom @memoriesat30@shanimallina87 @whoeverineedtobe

[snek-panini]

It is Monday, and Monday is for books. Look at these beautiful things! They took me five months to make. I tried so many new things in the process and I am extremely proud of them. This is a binding of @racketghost's amazing Good Omens fic Strange Moons (Hi. I hope it's ok I tagged you in this. Your fic has been one of my favorites since I found it in 2019.) The story is a series of short fics (and one long one) that really need no introduction from me. They're set throughout the 20th century, and they are beautiful and sensual and moody and you should definitely read them if you haven't already. This is the longest work I've bound so far, but I was fortunate that the word count on the shorter fics added up to almost exactly the length of the final, longest one, making them the perfect choice for a two-volume set. I tried very hard to get them to be an exact match, and they turned out even better than I pictured.

More pics under the cut! Two books means twice the pics, and all the stuff I tried here means it's a very long post, so be warned.

Individual images of the covers. The titles are done in silver htv over brown faux leather, edged in charcoal bookcloth. The graphics are the same on both, except for the title text, and they have the same image of the reaching hands on the back. All the art assets are from rawpixel, I just flipped and rotated some of them to make the back image.

The cover materials were an interesting challenge. I'd worked with both before and wanted to incorporate them both in the design, but after measuring and checking grain direction I found I didn't have enough of either of them to do a full book, or even a half bind. So they're actually made by affixing the faux leather to the book board, then layering strips of book cloth over the top. The corners are actually mitered at a 45-degree angle. Here's a close-up:

It's two long strips of cloth (spine and fore edge, not mitered) with two short strips (top and bottom, mitered) glued over the top. There was so much measuring, omg. I bought a new tool to make sure I got it right. Hilariously, I still didn't have enough leather and had to order another roll anyway. Also hilariously, I got the idea to do this after seeing an image of a leather-bound book made by a professional that appeared to have the same feature, i.e. multiple materials with an inset and mitered corners. Wow, I said, looking at a video thumbnail, I'm going to do that! So I did, even though I didn't watch the video. Much later, after I watched his tutorial, it was clear that the design was from leather dye and tooling, not the thing that I did at all. But I do like the effect, and now I know it's possible I think it'll be great for using up weird offcuts from making other covers.

Look, spines! With TITLES on them! And LITTLE RIDGES! Both firsts for me. I'm a little obsessed with them. The cricut has opened up entirely new worlds, though I suspect the little silver lines might have been easier to do with a foil pen (which I don't have) than they were with a heat press. I did them by making the cricut cut out several "=" symbols that were the same width as the spine. The raised bands are false bands; I made them by layering little pieces of chipboard on the spine stiffener, then molding the book cloth around them when I covered them. I was worried it wouldn't work, since this is usually done with leather and book cloth is apparently way less stretchy, but it worked fine. Probably because it's a small straight design, no curves or fancy bits. I'd layer the chipboard thicker next time so they stand up higher (this is 2 layers, I'd do 3 in future) but I'm delighted by how this turned out. They look so professional.

The endpapers on both books are a constellation print. I had a really hard time trying to find something to go with the typeset, and the only ones I liked were from an etsy seller who kept selling out of them. I got lucky eventually but it was one of many hassles that befell this project. I also made my own end bands using a tutorial from the Renegade Bindery discord. I had some issues and I didn't quite nail them but I think they're pretty good for a first time (ok, second time, the first one was on a practice text block, but my point stands). I had originally intended this to be a split boards binding, my first time trying that, but when I got the boards glued on I found that they were crooked. Really crooked. Completely misaligned. Much swearing followed this discovery. I ended up having to cut the boards free, cutting the mull and tapes in the process. The mull was easily replaced, but the parts of the tapes that are usually glued to the boards were a lost cause. I reused the boards, but flipped them so the edge with the cut tapes inside is at the fore edge so I could have a cleaner hinge. You can see in the last photo that the cover board is a little wider at the fore edge. On the plus side, there are no tapes to wrinkle my pretty endpapers and it combated the small bit of spine swell I had. On the downside, the hinge has less support and the only thing I learned was How Not To Make A Sewn Boards Binding.

I may have gone a little nuts with the images in this typeset. In my defense they look very pretty. In order, that's the title page, table of contents, section break image (same as the back cover, just tiny), chapter header and ender (each chapter has one on its first and last pages, they just look particularly cool when you can get a full page spread like this), and the image on the last page of the book (same as the cover image, almost). The cover image was also supposed to have little rays coming off its moon like this one does, but the lines proved too thin for the cricut and it ate them. I still like how it looks though. The prose in this story is really rich and I was in the mood for opulence when I did it. I have absolutely no regrets.

Here's a feature that's unique to this typeset. One of the chapters in the second volume has three alternating, interwoven timelines. I read them fine on Ao3 but had trouble following them when I formatted it for printing. Usually I'd use the section break image to denote when there's a scene skip but there are literally dozens in this chapter, like 40-60 breaks over the course of 10 or so pages, and it looked very busy with images in it. So I left them out, made the line skips single instead of double like they are elsewhere in the book, and I color-coded the text instead. One timeline is printed in black, one is dark gray, and one is dark blue. And it's a very surreal chapter, with the characters having some very confusing and conflicting emotions, so I feel like reading multicolored text when you're not expecting it (the rest of the book is all normal black and this bit is near the middle) sort of reflects that unbalanced feeling? I hope so anyway, because I love the way it looks so much.

I learned so many things in the course of making these. I'm absolutely doing all of them again. Part of the reason it took so long was that I wanted it to be perfect, or as near as I could get, and I had to take the time to solve all the puzzles it threw at me. But it stretched my creativity and ingenuity and I could not be more in love with the finished product.

[aashiqeddiediaz]

Hey, I love how you did the B/W strip + the text effect on your margaret atwood set, would you be willing to do a tutorial? 🙈

Hey Nonnie, thank you! Sorry this is a little late, but I did manage to hang onto this PSD for you.

We'll be making this gif:

This tutorial assumes basic knowledge of gif-making, Photoshop, and coloring. I’ve only described the text tutorial in this, but you can reach out if you have any questions.

(This is a different version of my gradient text tutorial, but the same principle applies!)

Tutorial under the cut:

Couple things to note beforehand:

There is a lot of trial and error involved when doing any sort of effect, and this is no exception! You might have to play around with the colors and the settings before you find something that looks good and readable and that fits your set!

This text effect works better on big gifs (540px width) that have quite a bit of movement below the shape so you get that effect.

For this effect, I find that a simple font works better than a cursive one, but play around with what you like.

We're going to start with this gif:

First, I'm going to add my text and center it. For this text, I used the font, Solar vesta Serif, with these settings:

Note: when you do letter spacing + underline, sometimes, the space after the last letter can lead the underline to stretch a little too far past the letter, making it look like the underline isn't centered properly.

To get past this, I just select the last letter separately, and put the VA setting to 0-10, depending on the font/letter.

We're also going to add a drop shadow here itself, and this is fully up to preference, but I used this:

All of that should give us this (yeah, it's the simplest thing because I'm lazy and I like easy things xD nothing too fancy)

Next, we're going to draw our rectangle around the letters. I like to keep even spacing around all the letters on all sides (in this gif, it's 4px on all sides) but just eyeball it initially, and then adjust accordingly.

I changed the fill to white (this color isn't important, I just used white because it's easier to show) and moved the layer in the back so the text is on top. It should all look like this:

Next, we're going to add a gradient map between the rectangle and the text later. I simply used a black and white gradient, and my gif now looks like this:

Here are the settings:

Next, we're going to delete that white box - the layer mask - next to the gradient map. Just click that and press delete (or right-click > delete layer mask). Your layers should look like this:

Now, we're going to add the rectangle as a layer mask. While pressing Ctrl, we’re going to hover our mouse over the square box next to Rectangle 1. Your cursor should show a white box with a dotted border. Click the square box with that dotted cursor and you should get a dotted selection line all around the box, like so: 

Next, we're going to select our gradient map layer, and then create a new layer mask. At the bottom of the layers panel, you should see a box with a circle in it (denoted with a red arrow). Click that - make sure you have your gradient map layer selected, or you'll end up putting the mask on the wrong layer.

The black and white will disappear, leaving you with just the box again. It'll look like this:

Now, just hide the rectangle layer so it looks like this;

And you're done! This is my final gif:

Once you get this basic thing down, you can play around with it all. For example, I like to adjust my gradient sliders so they emphasize the colors:

You can also just change the colors;

Unlike my previous text effect, we're not going for inverse X-ray effect, so for this, I like to make sure the lighter shade of the gradient is on the lighter parts of the gif, and same with the dark shade.

(If that's confusing, here's a side by side comparison of what the "X-ray" effect vs normal color effect looks like)

Anyway - it's fully up to you!

Because of the effect I was going for, I didn't add a drop shadow underneath the rectangle itself, but you always can if you want to make that a little bit more 3D.

You can also do this with any other shapes, too, with the same procedure.

Hope this helps, Nonnie! Let me know if you have any questions.

[crystallizedtwilight]

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the outfit post for LSB omg, so creative and satisfying to look at

Thank you! Here are some extra facts about their fashion tastes hehe

Lock - Loves to layer things and typically wears a long sleeve shirt or tank under his hoodies (unless it’s hot out). Doesn’t like text or graphics on his clothes because “There’s nothing cooler than Red. Red is all you need!” The one exception to this is the Naughty List sweater, which was a cheeky “gift” from Mrs. Claus, but it backfired because he thinks it's hilarious so that is the one exception. Doesn’t care for formal clothes but keeps them because Sally made it and he needs it on occasion.

Shock - Loves layering even more than Lock. Most of her outfits are 2-3 layered items. She actually adores the formal dress Sally sewed for her and she would wear it more often but is worried about ruining it during shenanigans. Doesn’t typically reach for things with text or graphics. Loves wearing lavenders, purples, and indigos the most but enjoys throwing a pop of teal in there for variety. Refuses to wear heals unless it's a very low one or chunky platform. Likes a feminine look as long as she can still jump a fence in it.

Barrel - Doesn’t like layering—he wants one comfy shirt and one comfy pair of pants and will call it done. Loves graphics and text on his clothes! Anything with a skeleton, bugs, or ghoul pun is right up his alley. Loves a simple, soft T-shirt. Has some things that glow in the dark. Enjoys pins which he’ll wear on his beanie sometimes. Doesn’t mind the formal wear. Prefers to be comfortable over fashionable but does a decent job at the latter, accidentally.

[cy-cyborg]

Ok so the saga with my old PC continues and is only fueling my desire to get back into fanfiction lol because I found all of the files from my attempt at making a legend of spyro fan-game! I honestly thought they were lost, I'm so excited to see all this stuff again! This was the "logo" for the game (I know its nearly unreadable lol, so it says "The Legend of Cynder, Shadows of The Past". 14/15 year old me didn't seem to care much for readability, I think I'd just discovered photoshop's layer effects lol)

Here's a bunch of random stuff I found.

I'm defiantly going to do a redraw of that last one at some point. That was like, THE thing I remember being super proud of when I first did it. I think it was going to be part of the trailer my now-partner was putting together for the game lol.

Actually, a lot of these were actually just frames from animations, but either the files are either just corrupted, or high school me didn't know how to set fps and resolution properly in the output so I got a headache trying to watch them lol. It's probably the second one honestly. Also I remember my old laptop wasn't able to play back the animation because it would lag so much, so I just had to kind of...guess at timing, and that went about as well as you'd expect. It didn't help that blender used to have this bug where your audio would move around your timeline so it really was just random guessing. I'm amazed anything got done at all, let alone how far we actually got (that is to say, not far at all but we had something playable at least).

I also found the demo files and footage of the "game" running (running at 12fps but running)! I'm curious if they still work, I'll have to download an older version of blender to test them out!

There's actually a lot more but actually finding it is proving to be quite a challenge since this laptop seems to be the digital equivalent of an ADHD "doom box" - meaning nothing is sorted into folders that make even a remote lick of sense to me, it's all just kind of thrown in together lmao.

I wanted to post these though because even though I don't really do 3D stuff anymore, It still made me really happy to see how much progress I've made over the years and how far I've come. Also a few folks who worked on this project with me back on Deviantart have started finding me lol, so in case there's anyone else out there, hello! I'm not dead, I'm still around, I'm just a lot more (openly) queer now lmao.

Image descriptions:

[ID 1: A game title that reads "The Legend of Cynder, Shadows of the Past". The two lines, "the legend of" and "shadows of the past" are written in dark purple text. The purple material is supposed to look like liquid, but instead just looks hard to read. "Cynder" is writen in black, 3D text with red outlines, with the exception of the C. The "c" is modeled as a black tube instead of in a blocky style like the rest of the letters. The inside of the C has a red underbelly, and the bottom of the C ends in a tail, resembling Cynder's from the Legend of Spyro Series. There are 3 white spikes at the top of the C. /end ID]

[ID 2: a 3d render of 4 dragons around a christmas tree. A black dragon at the front, Cynder, is using her tail to hang tinsel, a pruple dragon, Spyro, on the left is reaching up into the branches of the tree. A blue dragon, Ignitus, is hovering behind the tree, his paws outstretched, implying he is placing the glowing star at the top. On his head is a silver dragon, Zerali, balancing on his horns. behind them is a series of floating islands. /End ID]

[ID 3: A render of Cynder with a darker colour pallet than the previous image and glowing yellow eyes, snarling at the camera, guarding a black gem. The sky in the background is blood red and the terrain is flat and barren. /End ID]

[ID 4: A render of an incomplete model of Terrador, a green dragon with brown horns and rocky shoulder decorations. He has no underbelly or wings. /end ID]

[ID 5: A render of a fan character named ekkosel, a blue, anthropomorphic dragonfly with an unsettling, uncanny face and green wings, T-posing. Her green wings are a blur /End ID]

[ID 6: two sketches of a anthropomorphic cheetah heads. One has long ears like a lynx and is labeled DotD design, the other has small, rounded ears like a cheetah usually has, labled TLoC design. /end ID]

[ID 7: A render of Zerali, the silver dragon from the second image, and ekkosel, from the 5th, playing together. In this image, we can see Zerali has a pinky-purple underbelly and shiny gold horns.]

[ID 8: A rendered scene showing a close up of blue ignitus with his eyes closed. He appears to be talking to Cynder, who is in the background, but blurry. The game's logo is visible in the bottom left of the image. /end ID]

[denimbex1986]

"To be there on that day with him and Catherine, and faces that I grew up with, that like, essentially raised you, was just very, very overwhelming."

"Quite exciting to shoot two regeneration scenes within a few weeks of each other. The one with Ncuti, of course, was very different; very different to anything the show has done before."

"...Just when you think nothing can happen, you can never have two Doctors, oh, except you can!..."

"David Tennant and Ncuti Gatwa in one scene together, with Bonnie Langford on one side, Catherine Tate on the other, faced by Neil Patrick Harris. Everything thrown in; it's marvellous."

"Episode 3 is something that Doctor Who does really well, which is simply nuts..."

"I got a DM from Russell on Instagram...from page one, The Toymaker is a very intoxicating and juicy part. I set the whole thing down, I texted him back and said: "Let's go.""

"It's a great bit of casting to get Neil Patrick Harris. There's not many people you can think of who had the skill set. You've got to be able to sing and dance a bit, he's got to be able to do some ludicrous accents. He's got to be sleight of hand. It's very important that he can juggle. I don't know who else we could've got. If he'd said 'no', I think we'd have been in trouble."

"Neil; he just brought so many different layers and aspects to that character. I thought it was a brilliant piece of casting and just great fun."

"Another thing about Neil actually; when you're casting a villain in Doctor Who like this, you've got to get someone who can match David Tennant. That's hard to do. There are not many actors in the world who can actually hit that peak and be a proper enemy to him. So that's Neil..."

"I didn't do so much with the puppets a Catherine did...they were horrifying. I think there'll be some nightmares after this episode. I kind of become a puppet at one point...that was a - quite a complex little sequence."

"And the Vlinx is an extraordinary creation. I love the fact that there's no real explanation of where the Vlinx has come from or what it is..."

"...I wasn't really expecting to come back for this. I was very, very excited when Russell contacted me...seeing Mel brought back to life in a lovely, rounded form was so joyful..."

"To be on that open air helipad with David, with Ncuti, it was really magic. I think everyone knew...could feel the history in the air. Everyone knew something monumental was happening then."

"I feel very fortunate that one of my - I guess my very last scene in the show - is Ncuti's first scene in the show, and I get to actually be responsible in some ways for the new Doctor's appearance...I take a pride in the fact that I got to be there."

"We had this motion control camera which would sort of recreate the same movement so that several images can all be combined. It was exciting. But yes, having just met Ncuti, we had to get very intimate, very quickly and be sort of strapped to each other."

"It was so epic. David is like, an icon to all of us. To me, he's like one of the reasons that I became an actor. I don't know; he signifies everything to me that like an actor should be or can be. I remember getting like a copy of his Hamlet before I went to drama school, and it was very much like: 'This is - this is an actor.' David Tennant as the Doctor and myself as the Doctor, it was just so much fun. The catch scene was a lot of fun."

"In the script, there's just a page where it says: 'Catch, catch, catch, catch, catch, catch, catch.' That informed everyone that the intention was to, you know, to really drag this out; to make it feel like, precarious and on which so much rested."

"That scene was just very exciting because it's like each Doctor has like a moment where they're kind of getting used to their new body and so that's what that scene essentially was for me. And so that was like the funnest way to do that part of the Doctor's story."

"All three of us as actors are fairly physical and it required us to do a lot of single and individual shots; to be to be as cool looking as possible and as effective as possible because some of them were dives and catches, drone shots. To watch the three of us together I thought was really fun."

"It was trying to find enough ways to catch a ball differently. There's also a moment where I kind of had to propel myself off Ncuti's back, and we needed something to give us that lift, so yeah, a bit of trampette work; some of my finest."

"I could never, ever catch the ball, and so we ended up having to fake it...I was terrible at that."

"You would try and sort of palm it, behind your hand, and then do that as you caught it, which should hopefully make us look slightly better at catching than any of the three of us actually were.

"Ncuti did a one-handed cartwheel, just like it was nothing."

"I was going to do the one-handed cartwheel, but unfortunately Ncuti got in first so, as he was the new boy, I had to let him do it. Mine's a little bit better than his but it is what it is; it's fine. I'm okay with it."

"It's a physical show, but you know, when you're acting with those two, it just felt really exciting."

"So the Toymaker's magic mallet still has some inter-dimensional power left, which allows the new Doctor to double-up the TARDIS with, with one well placed whack. So we had two TARDISes; one TARDIS becomes two TARDIS."

"...when Russell told me that we were putting a ramp in the TARDIS, I - I cried. I did. He actually told me about a fan who had contacted him, who was a wheelchair user...he said: "Even though I can't get in the TARDIS, because it's not wheelchair accessible, I just love it." And Russell was like: "So we change it, instantly. We change that." When he told me that story, that really hit me, straight in the heart. I know what that will mean for the disabled community and many disabled Whovians who haven't had that; that's the first time the TARDIS is wheelchair accessible, and to know that it will be like that forever now feels - I'm gonna get emotional -...no, it's good because that's what it means because to know that I was part of that change - it's really special."

"I mean, who knows? I don't know what happens next. That's the exciting thing."

"The end is very simple; actually...It means David is parked, David is living. For once, we've got a happy Doctor who is no longer saving the universe, but that's parked, with Donna, for a happy life."

"Yeah, I suppose the Doctor will settle into being an honorary member of the Mott-Noble-Temple clan, and will see out his days drinking tea and trying to stop Wilfred shooting the moles I suppose."

[edupunkn00b]

Delirium

Photo by Fleur via Unsplash

Rated G - WC: 2660 - CW: fever, there might be a swear :)

Logan comes home sick from work and Janus cares for him. No-one expected feelings to come out. (Remy did. Remy expected feelings. "Told ya so, babes.")

Janus rinsed his coffee cup and wiped down the counter for the third time, gaze focused more out the kitchen window than on his task. Just over two hours ago, Logan had texted from the office, sounding… off and said he was coming home early. Nearly an hour and a half later, the barista at their favorite café called and said he was bringing his roommate home.

“Thank you, Remy,” Janus murmured, holding the front door open wide as the taller man half-walked, half-carried his roommate inside. “Lo’s really in no state to drive.”

“Yeah, he said he needed a little coffee to sharpen up before he made the trip over the bridge,” Remy laughed, shaking his head. “I make a good brew but caffeine won’t cure a fever.”

“‘M fine, Jay,” said roommate mumbled, left hand flopping up and landing ineffectually against his chest. Logan nodded slowly, brow solemn as though he’d just finished his closing argument.

“Yes, I see…” Janus’ smile dissolved when Logan’s cheek burned under his hand. Ordinarily unflappable, Logan would only show vulnerability like this under the influence of—as their favorite book would call it—extraordinary amounts of alcohol or, as now, a worryingly high fever.

“I’m double-parked, babes.” Remy said, smirking over his sunglasses. “Where d’ya want him?”

“I…” Janus’ gaze trailed up the stairs. Logan’s bedroom was two flights up in their narrow townhouse. 

Typically, the layout was welcome. Early to bed, early to rise, he would readily excuse himself when Janus was entertaining… company. It was usually just Remus nowadays, but still. Two flights up from Janus’ room, it was as though they each lived alone once nighttime came around. It was an ideal arrangement.

Except on rare nights like this.

Logan wobbled, stumbling to one side even with Remy’s arm hooked through his and Janus didn’t need to think, he just reacted, reaching for him before he could fall. Logan’s hand wrapped around his, warm. Too warm, Janus reminded himself. “I suppose my room would be best,” Janus finally said and together, they maneuvered him down the hall and onto Janus’ bed.

“Hmm,” Remy hummed, looking around the room. The centerpiece of Janus’ room was a high-set king size bed, layered with pillows and two comforters. Hidden between the layers was his weighted blanket. He’d never really gotten around to furnishing the room much more than that, preferring to keep his library in their shared shelves, and he worked from the dining room or his armchair in the living room. Wherever Logan had settled in with his own reading or case files.

He kept his room dark… ish. The walls were lined with warm faux-incandescent Edison bulbs Remus had fashioned for him out of LEDs and golden filters after he described the giant meta-analysis Logan had sent him on the impacts of artificial light and myopia. The dim light had only made Logan’s little approving smile that much brighter. 

“Cozy,” Remy laughed once they were done, then smoothed down his jacket sleeve where it had bunched up with his efforts to hold Logan up. He lowered his sunglasses so Janus couldn’t miss his lascivious wink. “Very cozy.”

“We don’t have that kind of relationship, Rem,”

“Whatever you need to tell yourself, babes,” Remy chuckled as he backed out of the room. 

“No… bed’s too big,” Logan groaned, voice muffled by the heavy down comforter. “Too far away t’hold you, Jay.”

Both men froze, heads whipping over comically to stare in Logan’s direction. “Wha—what did you say?” Janus swallowed, eyes wide. He had to have misheard.

“Oh, ho ho ho, Emile owes me ten bucks!” He hadn’t misheard anything.

Remy clapped Janus’ shoulder and started down the hallway. “Congratulations, man. Maybe now you’ll stop crying in your coffee all the time.”

“No, wait!” Janus’ arm snaked out and grabbed Remy’s sleeve. “Remy, no! You can’t say anything!!“ His eyes bore into Remy’s. “He’s delirious and doesn’t know what he’s saying. He doesn’t mean it.”

“Uh-huh,” Remy said, lowering his sunglasses and looking back at Logan who’d curled around Janus’ pillow, rubbing his cheek against the cover. Eyes closed, he was smiling and pressing little kisses into the satin. “Maybe he really, really means it and it’s only because he doesn’t know what he’s saying that he—”

“Remy…” Janus warned, fingers tight on his sleeve as he stared up at the much taller man.  “Seriously. Don’t.” 

“Alright, alright. Fine,” he said, shrugging. “It’s your funeral.”

“Thank you,” Janus said, belatedly releasing his grip. He pulled his hand back, thumb rubbing over his knuckles and frowning. That escalated quickly, didn’t it? “Thank you,” he said again and nodded, tamping down the embers of protective fire that had sparked in his chest. “I apologize,” he murmured, inclining his head.

But Remy just laughed. “Buy me a coffee and we’ll call it even.” Logan groaned again then, eyes squeezed shut and Janus sat next to him, adjusting the covers. “I’ll let myself out,” Remy said and closed the door behind him. 

Janus waved without looking away from Logan and clicked on his bedside lamp.

“Jay,” he said, squinting, and buried his face in the pillow. “Jay, I don’t feel well.”

The admission was almost funny.

“I know, Lo,” Janus murmured, pushing back his hair from his face. His skin was still terribly hot and pale enough that, if he’d wanted, Janus could’ve traced the latticework of thin veins over his eyelids and along his temple. If he’d wanted. 

“Rest here and I’ll get you some water and aspirin, alright?” Janus started to rise, suppressing a frown at the way even Logan’s hair seemed overly warm.

Before he’d moved away completely, Logan’s hand shot up and covered his. “You won’t go far?” he whispered, fever bright eyes fixed on him.

“I’ll just be in the kitchen…” Janus promised, voice trailing off when Logan his hand closer. After a moment, Logan stilled and Janus began to wiggle free. Logan’s eyes snapped open at the movement and laced their fingers together. “I’ll need this to get you that aspirin,” Janus murmured, the burn of Logan’s touch both drawing him closer and pushing him to get something to lower his fever.

Eyes slipping shut again, Logan nodded and relaxed his grip. Giving his hand one last pat, Janus whispered, “I’ll be right back.”

Leaving the door open so he would hear Logan’s calls, Janus dashed down the hall and back to the kitchen. He clicked the kettle on, then grabbed a basket from the top of the fridge and filled it with Gatorades from the fridge, a box of tea, apple sauce, Logan’s travel mug, and a pack of his favorite crackers.

The kettle clicked, water bubbling, so Janus unplugged it and grabbed the whole thing to set up in his room, basket hooked on his arm. Hot water would be one fewer thing he’d need to leave Logan’s side to fetch. Finally, he grabbed a bottle of aspirin and the thermometer from the medicine cabinet as he passed and hurried back into his room.

Logan sat on the floor, one arm out of his shirt, the other twisted behind him. His trousers lay crumpled in a heap next to him and his collar was up over his head, tie loosened by not removed. “Oh, Lo,” Janus muttered and set the kettle and the basket on his nightstand. “May I help you?”

“Please.” Logan’s voice was quiet and Janus wondered if perhaps he’d even drifted off. Kneeling next to him, Janus finished removing his tie and unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, a little sigh of relief sneaking past when he saw Logan’s undershirt. Relief. Not disappointment.

Perhaps… a tiny bit. It would be easier to regulate his fever without it.

“There you go,” Janus murmured once Logan was free of his shirt. “I put your glasses on the nightstand, too, Lo.” 

Logan leaned heavily against the side of the bed, eyes cracked open. He nodded then closed them again. “‘Ank you,” he whispered, hands flailing until they landed on Janus’. “Y’take care of me.”

“Anytime you need me, Lo,” Janus murmured. “I’m going to help you up onto the bed now, okay?” Logan’s head sort of wobbled in agreement, so Janus released one hand and curled his arm around his best friend’s back before pushing up to his feet.

Logan mumbled something unintelligible and leaned into his side, fever bleeding right through Janus’ shirt.

“I’ve got you, Lo,” he encouraged. “There we go,” he sighed once Logan was again seated on the bed. Holding him up with one arm, Janus stretched, snagging the aspirin and a Gatorade from the nightstand. “Have this, then rest.”

Humming, Logan curled into his side and let Janus feed him two tablets, sipping slowly. When he’d managed to h get about a quarter of the bottle, Janus recalled it and returned it to the nightstand. “It’ll be here for you when you’re ready for more.”

“‘nk you,” Logan mumbled again, curling on his side and twisting his fingers in Janus’ sheets. “‘nk you, Jay,” he said again, more breath than words. “Love you.”

Janus froze mid-rise, back curled over the bed as he reached to fluff the pillows under Logan’s head. He didn’t mean it. Remy’s little leer danced through Janus’ mind and he almost didn’t notice when Logan hugged his hand to his own chest, pressing kisses against his arm. “Love you, Jay,” he repeated, painfully clearly.

Patting Logan’s hand and ignoring the thrumming in his chest, Janus sucked in a slow breath. He’d never remember anyway. “I love you, too, Logan,” he whispered. “Rest well.” After a moment, Logan’s grip loosened and his brow went slack as sleep took him. “Rest well, love.”

~

Logan dreamed. He was at the beach, warm sand beneath him, warm sun overhead. Far from the shore, but close enough to hear the gentle susurations of the waves and catch a bit of the breeze coming up over the water. 

“Lo? You’re dehydrated, drink…” Janus appeared, watermelon daiquiri in hand. Logan drank deeply, then kissed his fingertips. Janus’ skin was soft against his lips, nails, as expected, perfectly manicured. There was the tiniest hint of calluses at the edges of his forefinger and thumb and he smelled like… bergamot and sage.

“Thank you, darling,” Logan murmured as he lay back against the sand. “That’s perfect. You’re just what I needed.” He sat up, gripping Janus’ hand between his own. “Do you know that? Have I told you? You’re just what I needed. Always.” 

“Shh, Lo, relax… Rest, love…” Janus’ voice blended with the sounds from the shore, the soft rush of water and breeze, and Logan nodded, eyes slipping shut.

“With you,” he smiled and drifted to the quiet crash of the waves.

The waves grew louder until Logan woke to… stickiness. His mouth was simultaneously dry and pasty, tongue adhering to the roof of his mouth, his teeth, his lips. He cracked open his eyes but quickly squeezed them shut. He’d fallen asleep with his light on and even the small glare from his desk lamp was enough to sear his eyes.

His bedsheets stuck to his skin and he was… damp, like he’d slept with the heat on too high. Fumbling blindly, he reached for his eyeglasses and knocked over an empty plastic bottle before his hand closed on the cold glass face of an old-fashioned analog alarm clock.

Logan bolted upright and waited for his eyes to adjust to the light. A plush yellow comforter slid off the bed and onto the floor and tiny glowing golden bulbs dotted the walls. This wasn’t his room. He swung his legs over the edge and picked up the mostly empty Gatorade bottle he’d knocked down. He stared at the bottle in his hand for a long moment before uncapping it. His eyes flew wide open at his first whiff of its remains. Watermelon.

Tightening the cap, he set the bottle back on the nightstand and finally found his glasses. Shoving them on his face he looked around the room. Janus was sound asleep near the end of the bed, feet propped up on the far side from where Logan had been laying. Hands shaking, he picked up Janus’ blanket and sniffed. Bergamot and sage. “Love you, Jay… Have I told you?”

Oh fuck. 

Reality and dream merged, the muscle memory of those words fresh in his mouth. A thermometer sat next to Janus’ clock and he thumbed through the history. 104.1, 104.5, 103.9… 

Taking pains to make no noise, Logan straightened the blanket on the bed as much as he could without disturbing where Janus’ feet were propped. He found his trousers folded neatly over a chair, his shirt and tie hooked on the back of Janus’ door. Logan managed to get his shirt back on but as he lifted his foot to put on his trousers, his toes caught on a beltloop and he tumbled forward, crashing to the floor.

“Lo!” Janus was at his side, one hand at his back the other already checking his knees. “You’re up,” he murmured, one cool hand coming up to his forehead even as the other worked to untangle him from his clothes. “Your fever broke,” he smiled, bright enough to burn.

Logan looked away. “I—I—I did not intend to wake you, Janus, I apologize. You’ve… you’ve been caring for me?”

“Of course, Lo. You were pretty out of it.” Did Janus sound… sad? No, just tired. He must’ve been up half the night with him.

“Thank you,” he said, then clamped his mouth shut before he could voice the questions burning in mind. He remained quiet while Janus helped him up and turned, remaking the bed while Logan finished dressing. “Thank you,” he said again.

“Anytime you need me, Lo. You know that.”

“I should… ah…” Logan’s mouth worked. How did he ask what he wanted to know? “H—how long was I out of commission?” he finally managed.

“Remy brought you home last night.” Janus gestured to the clock and the dark sky just on the other side of his window. “Last, last night, I suppose. You’ve been sleeping for about twenty hours?”

“Ah,” Logan nodded.

“You, um…” Janus moved to the side of his bed and patted a space a respectful half-foot from where he sat. “Will you sit?” He wouldn’t quite meet Logan’s eyes. His hands were carefully folded in his lap, thumbs turned in, tiny twitches in his tendons the only tell to his fidget.

Logan nodded again and sat where Janus indicated. “I… I believe I know what you wish to say, Janus.”

“You do?” Janus’ brow furrowed and even his thumbs stilled. “But how—”

“I have some… fleeting memories of the past day or so and I recall…”

“Lo, I’m sorry,” Janus interrupted and Logan’s shoulders sank before he remembered himself and sat up straight. It was better this way. Janus planned to be kind as he let him down easy. They could move forward.  “I never would’ve said those things if I thought you’d remember. I…”

Logan’s confusion must have been obvious because Janus’ words fizzled out. “What things?” he asked. “I…” Janus’ voice from his dreams filled his mind.

“Rest, love…”

“Oh,” Logan laughed. “I… I believe I understand.” Swallowing hard, he reached for Janus’ hand. Cool and soft. Callused fingertips just where he expected them. He laced their fingers together and they fit just right.

“I don’t,” Janus whispered, eyes down at their intertwined hands.

Logan slid just a little closer and Janus matched his movement. Watching Janus’ eyes, he raised his hand and brushed a kiss against his fingertips just as he had in his “dream.” “Maybe we can start there?” He took a breath and chance and smiled at Janus. “Darling?”

A soft chuckle spilled from Janus’ lips and he squeezed his hand tighter. “I like the sound of that, love.”