#it truly doesnt make sense to me how you guys can think this way

[cuckweeds]

if you think you are morally responsible for Trump's actions if you do not vote against him then why do you not think you are morally responsible for Bidens actions if you do actually vote for him?

[entering--hyperspace]

Thinking about how Leo has like literally all his life had to play the cards he was dealt. He only starts rising through the ranks due to a chance encounter with Rytlock who saw something interesting enough in him to take notice and start favoring him directly. He only joins the pact because Bangar placed him there for the ulterior motive of having a Tribune who wasn't a loose canon in a growing order, receiving their intel whole keeping an eye on them. He is Chosen by Aurene to be her champion, he is given a more prominent position as a reliable person because the commander faked her death and they looked to him to fill in the void even if he didn't want to, he was the obvious second choice. When I start thinking about how quieter moments It becomes more obvious why hes so uncertain, hesitant, or defensive about things in regards to stuff like raising Aurene, being in a relationship, or otherwise existing outside of the context he was put in. Sieran's death fucked him up severely Because he was given/made the choice to join the priory, he took that path all on his own and it ended with someone so new to life and the world dying.

He's such a cog in the war machine that can't stop turning and doesn't know how to do anything but turn but daydreams about a fantasy where he has a normal life and hopes desperately if he tries hard enough and if he plays these cards well enough he can force the wheel to turn the way he wants it to. It's quite literally the only option that exists in his mind, but it also kinda explains why he clings so hard for his love of necromancy and spirit communication because those are the other smaller parts of his life he chose for himself and actively does for the enjoyment of it.

[littlelightfish]

I've been thinking about Mickbell since last chapter came out.

Have you noticed how everyone refers to him as Mick? He's a hafling, they shouldn't call him that since its his first name.

But here's the thing.

We know Mickbell didn't have something to call a family the majority of his life. He was all alone against the word for quite some time. He, as I said before, didn't have a proper family, didn't have any friends. He was alone. No one to care about him, no one to love even in a friendly way.

He can seem to be quite unfair towards Kuro, but truth is he doesn't know any better. He does what he can the best he can, the best he knows, because he loves Kuro so much, he doesn't want to loose his first friend, his first glimpse of a family, the only one that cared for him after so long the first one to recognize him as someone rather than something.

Kuro doesn't understand common language well, we know for a fact that he struggles with it and that he's still learning to communicate. When Mickbell found him, it was his sense of "I'm in great debt to him because he saved me" what made him attack the one that attacked Mick. "How dares he tuch my savior?" Kind of behaviour. And also revenge I guess. But, hear me out. He hears Mickbell telling something to him in a language he doesn't understand, but he sticks to his side from then on, because he saw a savior in him. Because he feels in debt with him, because he sees that this guy enjoys his company and also feeds him. He is like a stray dog after being adopted, loyal. He loves and cares for Mickbell, he wants to be able to truly understand him and to make himself known to him by talking. He's learning how to speak common, not because it might be useful, but because he wants to be able to fully communicate with his dearest friend, with the one he considers family.

Going back to Mickbell, he saw someone caring for him enough to take revenge and protect him. This aren't little things to do for someone you just met. He knows this, because he probably wouldn't have done that, he 100% would've runned away because he has sense of self-preservation and knows damn well he doesn't stand a chance and he wants to continue living. He makes sure to keep this kobold to himself, at first because of his "if it can be made use of, then use it" principle.

He freed the kobold, not because he was a good person, but because he wanted to take revenge in his own terms. He wanted this man to suffer, he can't pick a fight because he doesn't stand a chance, so he steels his merch, or in this case, frees it. He freed Kuro because he wanted the man to suffer the loss of his merch. Not because he feels sorry for a kobold that could easily chomp his head off (they're usually agressive). Now, after freeing him, he noticed that this kobold would die if he didn't take off the thing he had in his mouth, so he helped him a bit there. This seems a bit out of character. Why did he freed the starved kobold from what could've saved him of being eaten himself? Because he is a good person. He doesn't want this creature to starve to death after freeing him, it would be cruel, and he isn't cruel. He doesn't want nothing to do with the kobold at first, he just doesnt want him to die because he didnt properly freed him, but after seeing how far is this someone willing to go for him? He has no room for doubt, he makes himself his boss.

As I said, Mickbell didn't had a real family before. He lacks of proper social interactions and bonds due to his past. But he loves so deeply. He doesn't want to loose Kuro. He sees him as the closest thing he'll ever have to a family, but he doesn't know how to treat him properly. He tries his best. He feeds him, and cares about him a lot, but he doesn't know how to talk to him. He wants to have him close at all times, he wants to pet him, to be carried around by him and only him, to tease him, to help him. He's always worrying about his well-being. And above all, he doesn't want to be alone. Never again. This is why he does everything he can think of to hold Kuro closer to him. This is why he's saving money, why he pays Kuro so poorly for his job. This is why he doesn't spent much money on himself either. He wants to live a life with kuro by his side because he loves him. He loves him deeply, and cares about him deeply too. He's his family. And he is terrified of the sole thought of Kuro leaving his side. Because that wouldn't just mean being alone again. It would mean Kuro left.

Now, this is what the party sees. A hafling that treats his kobold employee quite unfairly. He doesn't pay him almost anything, he leaves him alone as soon as battle starts, he is possessive about him, and he's terrified of someone snatching him away. The kobold doesn't seem to either mind or notice how unfair his owner is being towards him, and doesn't seem to understand him very well either. They see that they both care for each other more than they first thought as time passes by, but the unfairness of it all is still there. They don't get it. Why would the hafling, if he cares so much, reward him so badly? Why is he taking advantage of the kobold he loves so much? Why wouldn't he let him express himself in his mother language? They don't fully get it.

Time passes and they become closer to each other, just as Laios's party does. They start opening up, bonding, and before they knew it, they're something like a small family, rather than just a group of friends adventuring together. It's clear as day something in Mickbell wasn't quite right just by the way he behaves. He is childish, but it doesn't seem to be intentional. He behaves like a kid, but he is quite mature at the same time. He is like this because he didn't had a proper childhood? He only now can allow himself to behave lightly as he does? To cry at minor inconveniences? To want to be hold on someone's arms? They don't know, but they don't prey about it either.

And without realizing it, they call him just "Mick". Some of them, if not them all, know what it means to call a hafling by his first name. They maybe did it to tease him, maybe because they wanted him to know they consider him family, but he didn't even noticed. He hadn't a proper social interaction with haflings that ever got to the personal level of teaching him something he should already know. Haflings call him Mickbell, he doesn't mind, it's his name. His party calls him Mick, he doesn't mind, it's his name. He doesn't even know hee should care. The party picks up he doesn't mind being called that and gets surprised. Is he letting them know he sees them aa family too? They at first are really surprised, but it losses importance over time. They just use it as a nickname now, but they started using it because they wanted Mickbell to know they're family too, that they don't want to hurt him nor Kuro.

Mickbell it's just a good hearted guy who doesn't know how to do good. He saves up money so he can, one day, live with Kuro. So he doesn't pays him well even if he works hard. So he starves himself (he is underweight too, but it could be for the same reason Chilchuck is, he is 5 cms taller than the common hafling after all). So he allows himself to steal from corpses. He needs money. He has a dream. He wants to have a family.

[himbosandhardwear]

Slowly, like the way most things occur to Steve, he realizes that the way he and a lot of guys, probably most guys, talk about women is kinda gross. Kinda impersonal and objectable...no wait....objectifying. He loves that he can talk to Robin about chicks but as soon as he starts to say what he loves about them he realizes, though Robin likes girls, she is also a girl, and probably doesn't want to hear locker room talk. Which is when he starts to wonder if what he considers normal guy banter is actually gross douchebag banter.

"They're so warm," he says, which seems like a nice thing to say, neutral.

"I guess?" She frowns. "Guys are warm too though."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, I mean, women don't have a monopoly on body heat."

"Right," he agrees. Except what he was really thinking was the heat on the inside. Again, gross. That thought then leads to another thought. A weird, why-am-I-thinking-about-this thought. That guys are probably warm on the inside too. Definitely. Definitely warm on the inside. Shit. That's weird.

He doesn't have anyone to talk this over with anymore. Dustin is too young. Jonathan is currently getting warm with Nancy, so that doesn't seem appropriate. Wait! He can talk to Eddie!

"Is it fucked up to talk about sex stuff with Robin?" He asks Eddie the next time they're alone.

"What?" He responds.

"Like, she feels like a bro, but she's not actually a bro, cause she's a girl. Normally I'd talk about hookups with a bro but she probably doesn't want to hear about that kinda stuff."

"I guess," Eddie agrees.

"I almost said some pretty gross shit to her the other day but I stopped myself, thank god."

"How gross?"

"Just that I like how warm girls are, but, you know, on the inside. Which would be totally fine to say to another dude but she probably doesnt want to hear that from me. And then I started freaking out because it's probably just gross in general to talk about girls like that? Do you and the band talk about shit like that or was it just my asshole friends from school and I'm only just now realizing how fucked up it is?"

"Me? No, I've never talked about girls like that."

"Ah fuck, I knew it."

"But I'm pretty sure they're all virgins, so..."

"Oh. Do you ever talk about girls with anyone?"

"......no."

"I guess that means I'm an asshole."

"You're not an asshole, Steve. Talking about girls seems like a normal thing to talk about with your friends. Maybe not Robin, she might beat your ass."

"We could talk about that kinda stuff though, right?"

"Uh...."

"Never mind. It's stupid."

"No, it's just- I mean. You could tell me whatever. I'm cool."

"Oh, okay."

They stare at their feet.

"Is this weird? It feels weird."

"I'm gay, Steve."

Steve blinks. "Oh! Okay, that's cool." His eyes light up. "Wait! You'd know, are guys as warm inside as I thought?"

Eddie has a small stroke. He has to let his face say the words his mouth can't.

"Shit, it's still weird huh? Damn."

"No. Uh. It's just...why were you thinking about that?"

"Robin said girls don't have a monopoly on being warm and I just thought yeah she's right, so it makes sense that guys are just as warm as girls. It probably feels the same I mean. You don't have to tell me, you know, if it's weird to ask."

"Not weird to ask. It's just...I have no idea."

"Oohhh," Steve says. "You're a virgin too?"

"No."

Steve frowns in confusion.

Eddie wants to bury himself under a slab of concrete but makes himself explain. "You see, when guys fuck, one of thems gotta be the...warm one...as it were."

The line between his eyes doesn't lessen.

"I'm a bottom."

Still, somehow, he doesn't get it.

"Oh my god Steve, I'm the girl!"

His mouth makes a little 'O'.

"Yeah. That's not exactly how I like to describe it but you looked like you weren't visualizing. So."

Steve is having some truly deep thoughts. He's never thought about being the girl before. Like, obviously girls like being the girl. He hopes so anyway. But he's wondering what's the draw of being the girl if you're a guy.

"And you like it?" He blurts out.

Eddie, who's been a deep shade of pink already, turns violently red.

"Yup."

"Huh. Guess it makes sense. Never thought about it before though."

"Well, yeah, why would you?"

"Hey, I'm pretty open minded!"

"Sure. But straight guys don't tend to think about taking it up the ass. You know, as a rule." (A/N Eddie doesn't know wtf he's talking about)

Steve takes this in and realizes a few things, faster than he's ever realized anything before. He's thinking about it. And he's curious. And he wants to ask Eddie what it feels like and why he likes it. And he wants to ask if it hurts and if the pain is part of why he likes it. Because he thinks he might like that.

Fuck.

Okay. He can be normal about this. Eddie said Steve could talk to him about sex. It's normal and fine.

"We should fuck."

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

totally forgot what you think of shippy stuff but im gonna ask you anyway !!! do u think sabo n law would be friends ??! more than that ?! cause they have like . . . one arc together plus stampede and they dont seem to hate each other so !! im curious of your thoughts 🎤

Their dynamic for me is kinda just like “this guy is my little brother’s friend” kind of feel and thats really it for me. Like ifykyk what that dynamic is but for me they just,,,, theyre too similar to eachother to be much more than that in my opinion. I feel like Sabo naturally drifts to people who are very different than him, if that makes sense.

I think all the ship art I’ve seen of them is really funny though. Like they have a lot of comedic potential, I love people putting Law in Situations and that man is just doomed to be the StraightMan for the rest of his unintentionally sexy life.

And also like, to get into law’s world you really have to push and shove and claw your way in there, and Sabo is way too busy trying to get tf outta wherever he is to do that for law.

Now that im thinking about it though, i wish we knew how sabo and ace met. Cuz like luffy really had to push and shove and claw his way into Ace’s life, so i wonder if sabo had to do the same. Thats really besides the point though because i wouldnt really compare Sabo being completely alone and friendless when he was 5 and trying to find even a single friend in Ace, to Sabo in his adult years who grew up without a single memory of being alone and being constantly surrounded by people who love him.

Sabo isnt like Luffy is with making friends. Luffy has had multiple points in his life where hes had to really force people into friendship to have someone, anyone, in his life. This naturally is because he hates being alone, mostly stemming from just truly no one being there for him to connect with. He’s been woefully devoid of peers in his life. So for Luffy, having to brute force his way into people’s lives is just par for the course for him, which of course is how he became Law’s friend (self proclaimed)

But Sabo, with how he was raised post amnesia, he was never lonely. So in my opinion he wouldnt really have that drive to force his way into people’s lives like his little brother does. He wouldnt have that insecurity that Luffy has/had to make him like that.

And Law….. he’s had everyone he’s ever loved ripped away from him time and time again. To say being Law’s friend is extremely fucking hard is an understatement to say the extreme least. Sabo is also not the kind of guy to do things for people. Like for example Bartolomeo drowning in the colosseum as sabo destroyed the arena and just telling him “youre a man, do it yourself.” And then two seconds later to his woman friend he’s like “since when can you not take care of things yourself?” Like he’s very You Gotta Meet Him Halfway If Youre Gonna Meet Him At All. (‘Woman friend’ being koala, of course, but i just wanna emphasize those two points because truly it doesnt matter what your gender is or even if youre a close friend, that ‘do it yourself’ is rated E for Everybody)

Law needs to be broken in with a semi truck to be his friend, not even mentioning trying to be his lover and i really dont think sabo would put in the effort to do either of those things. I honestly think law shouldn’t be in any romantic relationship for a very long time because of how unbelievably traumatized and broken and ruined he is especially with certain recent events. So i really have a hard time shipping him with anyone even though theres lots of characters ripe for the picking.

TDLR: in my eyes, neither of them would put in the effort of trying to be anything with eachother and are kinda just on good terms because of a mutual friend.

By Every Means Necessary though, please keep shipping them and drawing ship art of them, i feel like the stuff i see with them is so creative and i encourage you to keep drawing those tragic men making out.

If you have any other thoughts or any ship/friendship propaganda for me though lmk please. This is kinda one of those ships where i really dont much understand it beyond The Bit. I’m just not the kind of person to really like ships without seeing a direct and canon dynamic between them I can pull from. Like even if its a negative dynamic i can still get into it but like these two truly have Nothing. So by all means, help me understand.

Thank you for coming my ted talk and thank you for the question, i really had to think hard about this and it was a lot of fun coming to the conclusion i came to.

[illyabata]

scars are A Thing™ with wriothesley and nobody can convince me otherwise, idc if there is zero mention of his scars or their meaning when he comes out idc it’s my permanent headcanon that scars and their stories are simply entangled with his character idc

so now i give you: wriothesley who is fascinated by your scars

tw: discussion of scars lol, but in no way do i indicate their origin unless it’s stretch marks. however if talk of scars at all is triggering to you, dont read!! it’s sweet fluffy stuff, but that doesn’t matter if it will trigger you. please take care :)

sfw, big brainrot under cut

theyre so much smaller than his, more delicate, just like you. doesnt matter if compared to other people you are big or tall, he’s such a big guy that he makes you feel small no matter your size or height. and no matter what your scars look like to you, to him they are beautiful. to him they are delicate.

he’s enamored by all of your scars no matter their origin—stretch marks, however, seem to intrigue him the most of all. he’s absolutely transfixed by them, and you can never understand why. he’s simply mesmerized by the way the blemished skin stretches as he thumbs and presses it, watching the discoloration flatten itself only to bloat back when he leaves it alone. for some reason he just seems so puzzled by the concept of natural scarring of the body; nothing had happened to harm you for these to appear—they’re simply the product of change, your skin either going through rapid periods of expanding or shrinking. he thinks they’re pretty.

he’d spend so long just running his rough fingers over your skin, absorbed in the feeling of the puckered tissue under his own blemished hands. whether the scars are stretch marks or from something else, he loves them, he loves you.

this might sound weird but i just like to imagine you both spend time gently tracing each others’ scars as comfort, like it sounds weird in words but it makes sense i promise. there is something intimate and fascinating about scars, no matter what they’re from; it’s truly like the language of your body’s history, a record of what has occurred. you can resent them or be proud of them, it really depends on the person and situation—but regardless, scars are always a record, and that is a constant no matter the person.

and if you’re not comfortable with that level of touch or that much attention on your scars, that is absolutely okay. he’s not going to make you uncomfortable, he’ll always ask if it’s okay before he looks at or touches them—or touches you at all, really. he never wants to hurt you. and if you say you’d rather he not touch your scars, he’ll understand and just show you he loves you—all of you—in some other way.

like idk about anyone else or if its just me and im fucking insane but sometimes i get lost looking at my own scars; sometimes the human body at work is just kind of fascinating to watch, and even more so in retrospect. it’s like holy fuck you’re looking at its handiwork, you can plainly see how the skin has been so masterfully rebuilt into this little woven bandaid of cells, carefully crafted to not only rebuild but protect. your body has looked after itself, and it will continue to do so. and thats just kind of a fascinating thing to me idk😭

some extra thoughts about scars, not really to do with wrio; red brackets will indicate the end of it if you want to skip: [[ it usually replaces any feeling of disgust i have because instead of focusing on the bad feeling of remembering where they came from or being sad at the way they look im able to think about how cool it is the way my body recovered and made my skin even stronger; it didnt just wipe it all away and give me a clean slate so i could forget, it pieced the cells together again bit by bit until it had not only replaced the wound but enforced it—so instead of forgetting the bad feelings, they were replaced by wonder. sort of like a sign that says “proof that where once there was pain, now there is strength”. it’s kind of like how they say you don’t just try to quit bad habits, you must replace the bad habit with a good one. you can replace the bad feelings associated with your scars with new feelings, whether they are good feelings or neutral feelings or meh feelings. ]]

before you, he understood scars to be an ugly thing—a source of shame, a show for others to marvel at if he left them uncovered, for them to ogle at and whisper about as if trying to guess the origin of the wounds was a sort of entertainment to them. and then in the fortress of meropide, his scars felt much less like a source of shame and more like an intimidation factor (which wasn’t something he necessarily felt good about, but it was something that he benefitted from as the duke). but when you came along and he began to know you, suddenly they were this beautiful, fascinating phenomenon that lead him to view his own scars in a different light.

he’s a powerful, strong man, yes. he’s intimidating and feared, but he is also loved, and all for good reason—he is solid and safe, an image of reliability to others. and sometimes it could weigh him down when he couldn’t seem to let another help carry the burden.

the way you made him feel, though, tracing his big ugly scars like they were rivers, like they weren’t repulsive—it changed him entirely, and it changed the way he saw himself. in the overworld, he was a criminal brute slathered in the proof of his savageness. in the fortress, he was the rock-solid standard for redemption, and he had to uphold his firm reputation. but with you, he was able to be fragile; with you, the walls he had built to protect himself from both sides of fontaine’s society came tumbling down, because he didn’t have to pretend when he was with you.

if such a small, sweet thing like you could see him in such a kind light with so much love in those eyes of yours, perhaps he was not so bad after all.

everyone else in all of teyvat could believe he was truly a bad guy like he sometimes enjoyed playing at—but it wouldn’t matter, because there you were in his bed every night, held fast in his big arms as you mindlessly traced the long, thin writings engraved in his skin, letting the stories they told lull you to sleep.

[w0rmm1lk]

Hiiii

Can I request a Bakugo (Cuz let’s be honest, he is FINE AS HELL) x gn! Reader who’s very socially awkward?

Like, if anyone they don’t know tries to talk to them they’ll just be like🧍‍♂️and give them that classic awkward smile

yes!!!! i relate to this reader sm and also I 100% agree bakugo is so fucking fine like??????? he's a fucking 2d character from a style where theporportions arent even based on humans, he has unmanaged anger issues and will fucking explode and not in the joking sense and yet????/ like whoever made hi design TEL ME YOUR WAYS. he's so fucking pretty. but also as much as I love him jeanist did him so fucking dirty with that hair. jeanist looked at *THAT* and really said "I can fix him"??? bitch don't fucking fix him I like the explosive pomeranian bitch. but like that one scene when he was making fun of todoroki during the provisional license extras classes like bro I was watching with my siblings and had to aggressively hold back a fucking screach noise. AND I STILL DO WHENEVER I WACTH IT. he's a fucking anime character who is so damn unhealthy but if you cant tell by the length of this, I fucking love him.

reader: GN

characters: bakugo katsuki

summary: reader is a very much not people person so how the fuck are they dating bakuhoe out of all bitches

warnings: swearing if you couldnt tell. anxiety, mentions of anxiety attacks. bakugo being a bitch.

💥- okay honestly, first day? didnt even know you were in the class.

💥- this mf too focused on beating everyone up to notice you.

💥- was forced to acknowledge you when you kiri and bakuhoe were in the same area during the usj attack.

💥- after yall beat the shit out of some ppl you were sweating a ton but not bc you just fought some bitches.

💥- your ass was panicked af, not only are you shoved in a small space with two extroverts, you're also being exxesivley complimented by Kirishima bc you punched someone and along with that the fucking usj is under attack.

💥- it was very obvious you were panicking tbh.

💥- like bakuhoe at this point doesnt give a shit about other peoples feelings at this point but even he could tell.

💥- you were just standing there with you r arms pinned to your sides staring into the distance as Kirishima was obsessing oever how you beat someone up.

💥- after the usj he started to notive you more often.

💥- he noticed hpw evenn when the whole class was close with each other, you were still extremely quiet.

💥- he noticed how awkward you were even when talking to your friends.

💥- he noticed how youd speak up if your friends were being rude to you but the moment someone like monoma said something you just shut down.

💥- he even noticed how panicked you were when you learned about the internships.

💥- during the sports festival you both fought one on one, that's when he truly noticed how awkward you were.

💥- like bro was beating the shit out of you while yelling shit like "say something damnit!"

💥- honestly even though he wouldve won anyways, the round ended faster due to your panic with him yelling n shit.

💥- bro was thinking about it more and was like "damn. but like why were they kinda cute."

💥- first thoughts?

💥- immediete denial.'

💥- bakugo thought his time would be something like loud and outgoging, someone whos super confident.

💥- then saw you who was about to have a fuckinh panic attack and was like:

💥- i want that one.

💥- honestly ur crush on him was not obvious at all, you were just your normal panicky self but this time with slightly more blush.

💥- honestly you guys didnt get together until someone had to word it to make it seem like they were challenging bakugo to confess.

💥- will fight someone for you.

💥- monoma insulted you? 3 days of house arrest for bakuhoe.

💥- someone judged you? explosions.

💥- cashier looked at you wrong? banned from the convenience store for the next 6 months.

💥- congrats on your new scary dog privledges.

💥- mf so fucking protective tbh

💥- its not that he doesnt think you cant fight for yourself, he knows you can beat anyone to a pulp. i mean like- you're in the hero course for gods sake man.

💥- more in the sense of, distant jealousy. you wont know he's jealous, but whoever is talking to you thats making him jealous will know.

not my best work but i wanted to type something lol.

[itgomyway]

(you)r sp and you ♡

i have already made a post about how you should love yourself and your sp will love you almost as much (bc they actually are you!) but lets go into more detail

a lot of you guys, including me, wanted to get into a relationship. and with that, youve discovered the law of assumption. the basics start off with whatever you assume will be. but after months of arguing, harassment, and bullying on twitter, you’re probably confused and too scared to ask.

FUCK THAT. let me be the one to tell you that none of it matters. you very much can and WILL manifest your sp. others false opinions (false because theyre not real) mean nothing. this isnt a loass post though im talking about non dualism (which is not the same).

“but wait… i want my sp and non dualism isnt about getting so why would i-“ because your sp shouldnt be someone that brings you happiness. they should be someone who adds to your quality of life. why does that sound like loass vs non dualism? because it is.

people use the law of assumption to manifest desires for their physical world. theres nothing wrong with that! that is how i manifested my current relationship. however, when we speak about non dualism, it goes beyond trying to get anything. youre just being. and “getting” into a relationship can very much help or make your false sense of self feel better. you as consciousness know relationships themselves dont exist because it is you but your ego, the false sense of self doesnt know that. it wants to experience love as part of the human condition. but youre still not getting anything. lemme explain.

you were trying to “get” something that was never outside of you TO make you happy. that doesnt make sense when not only are they you, but they are apart of you. everything your awareness is on “reflects” how you feel about yourself because all there is is you.

lets go back to non dualism’s basics. everything is consciousness = you creation is brought on by your awareness = you. “but back when x happened-“ the past and the future do not exist. the only thing that exist is now. you cant “apply” this way of thinking to something that doesnt exist. that makes no sense. youre just going to confuse yourself. i am telling you RIGHT NOW the only truly real thing is YOU. that is all there is and will ever be. you can control your awareness through observations meaning youre in total control. read that again.

so when it comes to your sp, romantic or not, they are never not yours. they were never not you or not a part of you. every thought, feeling, affirmation, or word you wrote down, they have received. because its you. think about it. are you ever aware of anything youre unaware of? (no). because things only exist the moment youre aware of them!

and remember, if something can come to our awareness like a relationship and leave our awareness it is not real. but you, as consciousness are infinite and are always here and always consciousness. so you are real!

after discovering non dualism i have thought about the feelings my boyfriend has presented to me and how they currently match the feelings i have for myself. i have always loved myself and will always love myself. if i didnt, how could i expect my creation, which is a projection of my own self image, to have different feelings than me? your sp isnt a separate person. Your relationships will always show how you feel about yourself, romantic or platonic. they’re not real because they come and go through your awareness but your ego as the false self believes they are. and thats okay. thats its job. let it be and observe them as consciousness.

nothing can happen outside of your awareness because the moment you are aware/conscious of something, it exist instantly. so if your sp is treating you the way you dont want to be treated then reflect on your own feelings about yourself. this DOES NOT necessarily mean work on your self concept. ask yourself if “you” think youre worthy of what it is your ego desires. a lot of my blockage came from that. i had to fall in love with myself so my ego could comprehend how i could be loved. because its still me.

lets talk about “free will”.

“free will” doesn’t exist. lemme tell you why. the idea of free will is a person outside of you having a say in their own life. the basic principle of non dualism means theres only one being, consciousness (you). so tell me how can “another person” “outside” of you have a say in their “own lives” when none of that exist in the first place?

your sp having or not having free will shouldn’t effect how you feel about them unless you see them as a separate entity outside of you. they’re not an “object” you control theyre your creation and another form of consciousness so of course you have control over your creations you have control over EVERYTHING.

your sp feels the same way you feel about yourself. always. if you dont feel good about yourself then i do suggest working on your self concept. not to “get” anything but for YOURSELF! why not love yourself? why cart that responsibility off to your creation?

at the end of the day, itll just be you surrounded by your creations. you can pick and choose what they are specifically BUT THE ONLY REAL THING IS YOU

© itgomyway

[simplydnp]

genuinely wondering why phil was considered the "ugly one" out of dan and phil. he's so hot? like there was a time where by some fans phil was literally seen as second best always... has that changed completely? i see more phillies than dannies these days which used to be absolutely the other way round if i remember correctly... like maybe it's just due to the fact that the fans grew up and delevoped some brain cells and/or phil having a glow up. what do you think abt this?

caveat: attraction is subjective and this is not a definitive guide as to what counts as hotness, nor is hotness the epitome of existence or something that people 'need' in order to exist, but instead this serves as an exploration into the culture surrounding perception of appearance as it relates to dan and phil, with care to note that 'conventional' beauty standards are highly correlated with white features and are problematic for many reasons but especially the racist aspect. i do not endorse the 'conventional' standard as the only acceptable one, but it would be remiss to ignore the fact that it plays a role in this conversation, especially in 2010s culture.

this is an interesting question for me because i don't Get all the layers of attraction just in general. so much of it makes very little sense, despite how hard i've tried to understand it. and what i've found out is that it's not supposed to make sense, it's something that just is and. well. my brain doesn't like that 😂 i've 'learned' what 'conventional' beauty standards are and thus can somewhat identify 'objectively' attractive people/qualities, but i'm absolutely just three possums in a trenchcoat on good days 🤣 so my best approximation is as follows:

- phil *pulled* back in the day online

- he stopped playing into it as much and because he wasn't exuding it as much, people stopped seeing it

- combine this with the less traditionally masculine energy he conveyed, alongside moving moreso away from the fully 'emo' look

- i think his fashion sense/choices played into this as well, came across very much like 'guy in tshirt' --which is fine, but unless your features really meet societal beauty standards at the time, it's not 'selling' you in the 'hot' department

- as well, contrasted with dan who had more of the 'societal beauty standard' look, people were less likely to see him in that role, especially because he seemed quite happy not being there (i'd argue some of it was a confidence thing too, especially on a day to day--the outfits video in gamingmas kind of confirmed that for me. he Knew he rocked that plaid suit, cause he did, but i don't think he felt that about his every day attire)

- people love to sort people into boxes and did as much with dnp, especially in making dnp 'opposites' (despite this not actually being true)

- truly think the fringe staying as long as it did didn't help, especially when, self-admittedly, it got a little blocky near the end.

- i think quiff really unlocked something in him. it really suited him, and he felt quite confident about it, as he had every right to. this, combined with a fashion upgrade in him paying a little more attention to it and developing his own personal style, people started to notice. (also dan hyping him up publicly about it made us talk about it more too)

- further style enhancements, more quiff experience led to him experimenting a little more, which let him find things he really liked

- i also think he's learned how to pose better/isnt 'being intentionally awkward' in pictures as much

- his ykw i want a change and idc what you all think attitude in going back to brown, and then into messy--he really Knows he's attractive now and how to dress himself to bring that out (even if he doesnt feel like it all the time)

there has definitely been a shift--i think the fandom has gotten smaller, and a lot of their 'mainstream' audience were dannies back in the heyday bc of the 'societal beauty standards'. so combine many of those people leaving, at a similar timeline to phil figuring his 'look' out, his audience getting older (and the lesbians being Very fond of him), and his consistency in uploading the last few years, i think it all swirls into this current existence where there's a lot of phillies out there and they're loud and proud about it (as they should be), especially cause a lot of them have Always Known but it wasn't the 'popular' take at the time.

i am but a hapless dannie and any phillies who would like to share their two cents/drag me for being wrong pls do so

[yellowymellon]

my crippling obsession with Elio is back at it again so here's some takes and theories

i think elio's main strength isnt his curse/blessing to see the future but his monster ability to analyze the situation accordingly and read people's emotions/thoughts. Since his ability only allows him to see the multiple possibilities of the future, that means he still has to maneuver his human resources optimally on his own.

He seems to be great at mind games, knows how to read people's hearts as sam said, and appears to be a pragmatist who doesn't mind sacrifice. i mean we're talking abt the guy who foresaw the crisis of the luofu long before the matrix could ever and did nothing, the one who orchestrated the fall of Jepella Brotherhood so that the Annihilation Gang succeeds it only for them to fall too and allow acheron into penacony, the one who foresaw sunday's plan and only acted last minute. all because the time had to be right.

and ofc i'm going to mention his concept art, i know it was a deal breaker for many but personally? I LOVE IT. A master manipulator hiding behind high trusting features and his young age? i know this point of view goes both ways but i think him being young (by anime logic he looks YA to me) actually adds more depth. Elio has always been fascinating exactly because he's mysterious, there's many possibilities to what he's truly like. A boy who witnessed the demise of the universe in nearly every possibility, doomed by fate yet fights against it. does he curse his powers? does he feel obliged to go through all this? or does he latch into that tiny hope he saw? does he not care for the innocent or is he like kevin who realized sacrifice is a must?

i also initially expected him to be an older man but im used to young anime prodigies lol if anything him being younger sets him for doom and tragedy.

Aside from his physical appearance, i think we all agree that Elio is the black cat, but lemme cook here....im 100% sure (would be funny if im wrong) that Elio doesnt physically move from his HQ. why? cuz they always avoid mentioning his appearance. not when he recruited kafka nor with SW, the only 2 so far that elio personally recruited.

"A man, a woman, a metal humanoid, and..."

"There is a chance she will stop to investigate the can. Then, take the chance to throw this ball at her feet. I will take over and converse with her from there. "

in kafka's case it's implied that elio would converse with her through the ball, and it also further implies that elio works with 'contractors' who arent part of the SH, some speculate the rest of the umbrellas on kafka's splashart might be them.

also, this is too funny to pass so ill put it here :

"There is also a chance that Kafka will ignore the can. In that case, just throw the ball away. You will die, but death will come for everyone. As for the future that you yearn for - I will realize it."

heck i even believe the rest of SH dont know what elio looks like. it makes sense that elio would be cautious and hide his identity, he even uses another alias. this world has factions that can manipulate and access memories after all.

About his powers...idk why there's this misconception in the fandom? but we can simply conclude from kafka who's the second in command and the only other person to swear loyalty to elio that both of them do not believe in a predetermined fate.

actually nvm i know where the confusion comes from, it's the script. how the script works is still a mystery but in kafka's companion question she answers by a no (truth) to whether fate is predetermined, that alone is the answer to elio's belief. if else why would he waste his time trying to change a fate that cannot be altered? So he's lying to his companions now? kafka says his powers see the many possibilities of choices that merge to make the present. i dont think the script is part of his powers but just his compiled knowledge of the actions ppl will take, and many of those choices and actions converge to create the same result, therefore there's a fate that can't be escaped and that is the script, and that's the only destiny that exists.

now in the SU, there's an interesting occurrence :

Fuli adresses us as Elio even though we are akivili in the SU, this lead to theories abt elio being akivili but i'd beg to differ. fuli also addresses us as nanook. so are we saying nanook is akivili and elio? i think this links fuli with elio more than anything and here's how :

We know that elio is trying to kill nanook, and to that he created TB with the help of an unknown aeon. Elio's powers might seem like they're a gift from terminus, the aeon of finality, elio could have the identity of an omen vanguard, but his design just like sunday's has some Order elements, making him a potential follower of the order. Fuli being on Elio's side makes sense. there's no way elio can know of ppl's existances in this very vast universe solely from watching intertwined fates. SW only caught his attention after she proved herself against screwllum, meaning he isnt able to know of everyone. and his ability doesnt allow him to peak to the past, so he cannot possibly be aware of everyone's deep desires right? thus fuli granting him their memories allows him to understand better how to reach out to them. let's take sunday's letter as example, how is elio aware of the dove and how much it meant to sunday?

i think fuli's message means something along the lines of time is running out. on the other occasion of fuli's appearance they show us a memory of kafka hmmmm

but wait! it gets better. i was reading fu xuan's lore and i couldn't believe the extra possibility, here's this :

"The girl did not open her eyes, yet she could already see the world around her condense into solid form from nebulous mist, see all possibilities fade and leave behind the solitary, absolute, and faultless "choice." "

isnt this awfully similar? indeed there's differences in their powers and how they use them. fu xuan uses the eye to see the one true possibility from all the others, with it she can keep exploring the many possibilities, this at least is very alike.

do you realize what that means? nous actually isnt just a space robot, they cook, they cook too good and they might be the one on elio's side which is CRAZY to say the least. if fuli can help elio see the past and know of things he otherwise cant know, then nous would be able to do the same because they know everything there's in the world, and can help modify TB to store the stellaron. ISNT IT CRAZY?? MAH BOI IS FAVORED! but that only convinces me that terminus is more and more useless lolz

also we see fu xuan possesing a third eye, in elio's case his eyes are totally changed, unworldly.

think it's worth mentioning that fu xuan isnt able to see TB's future meanwhile elio is able to and even a supposedly unreliable heliobi :

this isnt the first time we were compared to nanook or told that we will ascend i just don't have the proof lol, with that in mind what does elio want to accomplish? maybe TB was created in naook's image? from their memories? so that someday we overtake them...maybe Elio might've created a person who wouldn't deviate from his script to ensure their ascension. Kafka never told us the 3rd way to kill an aeon .

On another hand ppl are speculating that the one who talks in the dreamscape pass is elio, im not sure abt that tbh...they mentioned aha twice for me to think it might be sampo lol but elio makes sense, and if it's truly him then oh god he is silly lolol

some also say the voice of narrator at the end of penacony might be elio since CN recognized the va, i play in jp and i think it was shimono hiro? i was like this is too popular of a va to be giving to a narrator TT

Also it seems like some plot points are inspired from a game called ghost trick (IT'S GREAT!! AND I FEEL RLY EMPTY INSIDE) once I finished it I finally understood something that I didn't before, what it meant for terminus to go to the past to recite the prophecy of the future. Not spoilers dw

anyways i feel so much better now ty for reading all the way!

[udkmehahaha]

Hey there, you expressed that you are open to talk about byler so I hope it’s ok that I ask you :D I was wondering how you deal with byler / duffer doubt, if you have doubts at all?

The last time I was emotionally invested in a ship was with Sherlock and John back in the day,,, and that ended up being heartbreaking, so I‘m afraid of this happening again..

Especially since I see some parallels with the way a lot of people look at the writers, I think? The writers of Sherlock were also thought to be these great detail oriented writers, who craft the narrative so wonderfully subtle … and with Sherlock it turned out that they were not these writers we imagined them to be at all…

I’m also afraid that I just project my own feelings onto Mike, my queer gaze haha

But it’s a comfort for me to know that el will have her arc of independence, cause she obviously deserves to explore the world and herself and not just stay with the first guy who stumbled upon her! :D it also comfort‘s me that will‘s feelings for Mike will have to be addressed even more in s5

Do you have anything to comfort you? Or are you very convinced?

i think everyone has their fair share of byler doubt moments, but for the most part, i truly believe that byler will become a thing for 3 reasons.

1. byler is the only ship in the show handled with SO MUCH CARE. the van scene took a whole DAY to film, and the writers, directors, and the crew (even the actors) all love this ship so much and you can see that through all the thought that is put into their scenes.

2. i always tell anti-bylers to rewatch the show and really dive deep into the mike/el/will love triangle because if you REALLY analyze, (and have some common sense) you will see with the way the characters have been written, the way the story has been going, it ALL adds up to mike and will being the end couple and if you dont want them to be the end couple then you dont want happiness for the characters.

3. since the beginning, we have been feeling bad for will. the poor kid went missing in an alternate dimension, had an abusive (later absent) father, gets bullied in school, got possessed by an evil monster and told people how to fix the problem even if it would end up killing him, got left behind by all of his friends, still has a connection to the place that will haunt his nightmares forever and likely will still have that connection until vecna is dead, got swerved a hug buy his best friend, got third wheeled (on his birthday) and is a gay kid in love with his best friend (and made us believe that his friend "does not reciprocate his love") in the 80's. so tell me, why would they make this kid suffer AND make him queer just for us to see him get heartbroken and sad in the end, because its a pretty known fact that without mike, will might likely never be happy, so why would they end up doing ALL OF THAT for will, just to see him lose in the end? that doesnt make sense, the audience is rooting for will, and vecna dying, healthy relationship with his family and friends, and being able to kiss mike on the mouth are the key things to make will happy.

honestly my only doubt it that the writers will just simply change their mind about it. 😭 or netflix will not let them do it. also this might sound crazy but sometimes i dread byler coming on screen because my dad is probably the most homophobic person ever and i dont want to deal with him talking about some "2025, they wanna make everyone gay so people will keep watching" and im just like no. you dont get it.

thank you for the question! keep sending more.

[squarebracketsmileyface]

On a totally opposite end of the spectrum from the role swap-

Imagine if after the Promise chapter things flipped. If after that argument The Operator- out of pure animalistic type curiosity- said “ooh lemme stick my fingers in this sauce here” and left Alex alone to latch onto Jay. Its already discovered how it can push and twist and manipulate one person, but what about a completely separate person? Will the results be the same? Different? Will it be easier or harder?

So it latches onto Jay, and Alex experiences a flat out withdrawal from that thing’s influence, followed by the most gut wrenching clarity. Realizing how crazy he went, how he killed his friends to “save” them when it never would have mattered. So two weeks pass, and all he can think about is Jay- talking to him again and telling him everything, being honest and actually fucking admitting that he cares about him, that he wants to make good on his promise and do things right.

But Jay doesn’t answer. Jay is the one who drops off the planet and goes MIA, and Alex has a horrible, sinking suspicion he knows why. He hopes that Jay just finally got sick of him- he HOPES thats all it is- but deep down there’s this creeping suspicion that its not a coincidence. That he passed his own torment on to Jay like some twisted fucking disease-

He finds out he’s right, later on. When he starts working together with Tim(he’s desperate to find Jay, to fix things, even if that means groveling for Tim’s help-), when they start having run ins with Jay where he won’t see reason, where he argues every point they make and tries to convince Alex that everyone has to die, to help him(and wow, did he sound that crazy too? probably, yikes-)

And in the end Alex makes one last desperate attempt. He meets Jay somewhere alone, tries to convince him to come with him, tells him that he loves him-

But Jay doesn’t believe him. He tells Alex as much(“i love you but i can’t trust you- you said it yourself, why would you ever love somebody like me?”) and Alex wants to cry when Jay throws his own awful words back at him, things he never meant to say-

But what destroys him is when Jay takes the gun that he stole from Alex months ago, puts it to his own head and pulls the trigger with a bang right in front of him.

I’m in a dark mood today LMAO we die like tunnel guy

we die like tunnel guy lmaoooo

fucking THIS tho oh my god the ANGST

i literally have nothing else to add really, my brain saw this and turned into angst mush i fucking love this so much. Jay not believing Alex when he says he loves him fucking OW. This is literally fucking perfect. like, actually.

Everyone come look at this and be fucking destroyed by it because OW. it's especially sad because i'm thinking so much about Alex being the one feeling super hurt and stuff in his uni relationship with Jay, because im writing if it ain't broken at the moment. I am in the perfect mindset for just pouring over Jaylex angst with Alex being the one left feeling worst for it.

Honestly though, Alex finally seeing things fully, truly clearly and realising how terrifying and horrible it must have been for Jay to see him the way he was with the Operator in his head, all angry and not seeing sense and arguing every little thing.

withdrawal from the Operator tho, like, actual withdrawals from it could be so interesting. Like, how would that interact with Tim since he's been dealing with the operator since he was a kid presumably. is he fucked either way? like, if he doesnt take his meds he could get withdrawals from them, and if he doesn't take them for a while then goes back on them does he then get withdrawals from the Operator? Or is it different because the Operator isn't in his head the same way it's in Alex's? is just being near it enough? Like second hand smoke?

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

Venus in the 6th; Harmony, Love, & The Universe Surrounding Them

Venus in the 6th house individuals have a love for life itself. They crave a new life every morning when they wake up. Their lives can be based on some sort of routine because this can give them a sense of purpose. Their work life has to let their essence shine is some way or they will be extremely drained. When it comes to their love life, they must always choose themselves. If they dont do this they will be in a world of trouble.

All of these things I mentioned can heal them or hurt them in the same breath. With venus 6th house people, their self esteem has to be at an all time high. They could be used for what they have or what they know. These individuals take learning to a whole new level since the 6th house is the house of virgo. In some way or form, they may love to teach, and may end up in teaching roles that they didnt ask for. Natural leaders, they can show people how to be more compassionate, graceful and empathetic in these roles.

Now back to their love life, why I said they should always pick them selves is because at most points of their lives they may have been bit of a people pleaser. They do this to keep things going at a stellar pace, not moving out of chaos and just wanting things to be the same because it works to keep their minds and bodies in check. If anything gets a little out of whack, they'll think they did something wrong and will continuously search for harmony in the relationship by putting themselves in the back burner. They dont mean to do this, but they must learn that it isn't always on them to keep the relationships in balance and order. It must happen in due time.

What I like about these individuals and this placement is that they love a divine feminine/divine masculine dynamic.

That can apply to anyone doesnt matter the persons sexuality, as we all carry feminine/masculine traits.

These individuals truly want a spiritual connection with their lovers and me be prone to committing to celibate acts or staying away from sexual relations that do not appease their senses deep in their core.

This is another thing I must mention, sex with them is an act that connects them closer to the gods. They do not view sex as some hit it and quit it act. They'll wait years if they have to, to get the love that they crave. Making love is what they truly desire, not the fake stuff.

Their love is universal, and they love to help others in any possible way. However they must be careful because although they can be of service to other people, they could be seen as an opportunity for someone to get by and this can drain them. Thats why in the beginning of this post I declared for you guys to choose yourself first at all times because its easy for your compassionate energy to be used very quickly.

When it comes to work, please quit that job if they are not treating you like the royalty that you guys are. When you leave a work space that isn't for you, you get blessed. Like karma works in your favor because you are openly choosing yourself no matter what happens.

This can go for love and friends too. When something is no longer working for you and the routine is chaotic & draining, you choosing yourself well bless you with better friends and lovers each and every time. So I say this to all my venus 6th housers is that you guys have an incredible power when it comes to your love for the people and the universe itself. This will never go unnoticed. You may come across old friends, lovers, work associates and they'll probably tell you that you were a great person after all of these years. So don't look back at the times where you over extended yourself & evidently became used for it. Look to those moments where you gave your all and you committed to showing empathy and being of service in anyway you could. Thats it <3

[somerandomcryptid]

ah no no sorry i confused the words bc i was asking of You wanted to talk more about the cpunz and cquackity and c!cryptid stuff related to your recent art post but i got confused if it was part of You previous au or a new one and got confused, sorry 😓

-cleo

Ah yeah that makes more sense. No problem! actually kinda good you got confused cause I think I may have cooked something kinda fire so before I absolutely lore dump on you have some sketches of an au where Punz is a big doggo I just did

Man’s best friend :)

Anyway onto such less wholsome stuff because yeah those sketches were for Dreaming of death

also tw for implied child abuse and one mention of a child being hit (not contiunasly just twice with different people behind it each time), and one other mention of a child being harmed in a relatively minor way

I really should have clarified this is almost directly after the other Cryptid and Quackity in formal wear arts I’ve done. which I don’t think I’ve ever really explained? because honest i haven’t decided all the details. i just know that a fancy event is held at las nevadas and afterwards the las nevadas crew kinda like, goes around the server? like bar hopping but without the bars? they’re still all deunk though. it’s very chaotic.

They just so happen to run into staged duo (not directly but staged duo can see them, if they actually had awareness they’d probably be able to see them too)

and uhhhhhhh welll Cryptid and Q aren’t exactly.. obeying quaritoine rules?/platonic this pisses both Dream and Punz off. amd wellll Punz is kinda the more confrotational of the two?(he feels like he should fight dream’s battles because he wasn’t there for him in prison)

so he uhhh yoinks his child cryptid. They do not appreiate this. Q also, does not appreiate this. but Punz kept Quackity in his basement for 2 weeks and experiemented on him, safe to say he has the intimadation points. and the height advantage.

Anyway yeah that’s all the context I SHOULD have given. But brain was wprking a mile a minute because dod!Punz is walking contrictions if they were good at pvp. and I love him for it.

to elaborate on that. the guy is one, trying to gaslight himself imto thinking he doesnt want to make out with Dream, two trying to gaslight himself into think he doesn’t care about Cryptid.

which like…. wrong but also he does truly hate Cryptid a bit and is hella jealous of them. He also has tucked them into bed and condsidered for a brief second staying with them when they request him to.

And that’s not even touching how Cryptid feels about him. because he is the reason for aproximately a 4th of their issues. and also their idol a bit.

and they just hate each other but also care about each other in such an interesting mix.

Punz genuinely thinks they are a brat and that they are incredibly dramatic about how bad their lofe is because they have it ”good” in his eyes. but he also genuinely would never want to see them hurt and seeing them with Quackity makes him seeth because their risking their safety and also that their wasting their potential which he begrudgingly admits they have.

But also. he is the only person on the server to have scarred Cryptid(physically I mean), when they first met properly he held a dagger to their throat. they were fine, it’s just a little scar but it was still signifagant. He is also one of the only people to have hit them, the only other person being Quackity, was only once. still happened though.

Sorry this kinda just spiralled to me rambling about dod!punz with no real end point but he’s one of my favorites for just how convoluted he is. i would ramble more. but also it’s 6:30 am and I should go to bed lol.

(Since I’m main tagging I’m going to put the big ol’ Dreaming of death is an au of the fic penpal by @calamari-minecraft-corner :3)

[zapsoda]

i think supervillain organizations need human resources too: zapsoda states the obvious for a looooong time

i find black hat fascinating because he is truly sadistic in a way many villains are not and it gives him a really bizarre dynamic with his 2.5 employees.

his sadism is something you have to keep in mind when analyzing all other asepcts of his character because it immediately answers most of the questions that arise throughout. for example:

q. why does he torture and threaten his employees?

a. he enjoys it :3

q. why is he so adamantly opposed to replacing them, despite his supposed contempt?

a. either he doesnt actually dislike them that much, or the catharsis and pleasure from tormenting them all the time makes up for it.

and finally, the one i enjoy the most: why is his favorite employee flug?

obviously, his least favorite is 505, because 505 is like. the embodiment of good. the opposite of evil. hes basically a big fluffy hero which is like. exactly what he hates. you might be asking: why does he let flug keep him around then? the answer:

i just have to trust all the bullshit the wiki says at face value since none of its sources are accessible anymore as far as i can tell.

anyways, that leaves us with flug and demencia. and demencia is like ... the obvious choice. i'm not just like biased cause i'm in love with her shes got it all: she's evil (at least more evil than flug), shes strong as fuck, and she worships bh. that's perfect, isn't it? the thing is, he doesn't seem to like her as much. this is the most evil part about him i think but here's why:

dem looooves him and i don't think he really wants to be loved i think he wants to be feared. he doesn't want people to feel happy when he's around, he's evil. theyre like orin scrivello and arthur denton.

in this regard, dem is a little too crazy for him, in the sense that she does not have the self preservation instincts flug has. she knows when to fuck off so bh doesnt rend her to pieces, but she generally doesnt exhibit the same fear or caution that flug does, because she believes fully that she is sooo awesome and black hat is soo perfect and in love with her that nothing bad will happen ever.

this makes her supremely difficult to fuck with in the traditional sense, because if he tries to do it without some sort of disguise or element of surprise, she'll just make big heart eyes lol. black hat doesnt get his desired reaction, and the interaction is no longer enjoyable for him.

obv, bh still has some attachment to her and does still find ways to screw with her, but it is harder and he has to be more creative. i think what he primarily enjoys about her is how evil she is. this might be a bit far fetched, but in the wrestling episode he clearly loved making her beat the shit out of flug. i think maybe he sees a bit of himself in her. but see, even here he is using her to accomplish the larger goal of getting under flugs skin (literally and figuratively).

so ultimately, we are left with flug. he is (also) entirely loyal and obedient to bh, but also he is scared shitless of the guy. i cannot stress enough that flug sees himself very highly, thus, he values self preservation above most other things. the way he sees it, he is so smart and awesome he can't die or feel immense pain, that would really suck! this is perfect, because it makes him so, so easy to fuck with, and black hat takes advantage of this constantly. its basically his favorite hobby.

this dynamic wouldnt work, of course, if flug didn't also have this weird fucking stockholm syndrome or whatever. he does adore bh. the bit in the opening of the pilot where he dreams of getting like. the mildest praise imaginable from black hat. haunts me esp cause it doesnt seem to come up again after that. he obviously wants to be respected/revered/admired for his intelligence and accomplishments, and from someone who he respects as much as bh even the tiniest crumb of validation is enough. because of that, he will do basically fucking anything for bh.

thus, black hat gets the best of both worlds: 505s fear and eternal suffering and demencias evil love and respect.

[the-bjd-community-confess]

Hello, this is your Oldie Chinese Diaspora Anon™️ I came across this Anon (https://the-bjd-community-confess.tumblr.com/post/757452685040631808/im-surprised-acbjd-isnt-an-official-dealer-for ) and their question-to-the-aether, and I think I know the answer. It’ll most likely answer a few other questions that have been floating around here as well. At least I think so, anyhow… I’ll try!

For starters, let me introduce you to something called the Universal Postal Union (Union postale universelle, UPU. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Universal_Postal_Union). For something so archaic, it is actually the largest reason why a lot of things that we complain about are the way they are. Anything shipped and mailed internationally follows the rate set up by the UPU. According to these international rates, it’s much cheaper to send anything by mail from Asia to Europe or North America. And it’s more expensive to send from South Korea than it is from China. This is why it makes sense that dealers based in China are able to offer free shipping – shipping is cheap enough originating from China that the dealers can absorb that cost. This is also why dealers based in China rarely deal for any company that are not Chinese in origin. It means the dealers will have to eat twice the amount of shipping (from country of origin to China and from China to final destination). It’s usually too cost prohibitive to do something like that, unfortunately.

This also reminds me of the question posted by an exasperated Anon a while back (https://the-bjd-community-confess.tumblr.com/post/748048371225346048/its-hysterical-that-divas-doesnt-understand-how ). Now, here’s a bit of a disclaimer: this specific dealer had shafted yours truly as well. After waiting for 2 years for a body with jointed hands, I was informed earlier this year that it was lost in transit. It’s a most dissatisfying result to a very long wait, and even if I was refunded the whole purchasing price, it was still left me with some distaste. I just wanted to make sure that nobody thinks the OCDA™️ is taking sides or deliberately speaking ill of either side of the conversation. Please understand, that is never the intention.

America-based dealers, like the ones mentioned in these conversations, are dealing with the unenviable position of paying two different shipping fees. They are also at a great disadvantage when it came to the UPU rates – shipping from the US is among one of the most expensive around the world, not to mention tariffs and import taxes. This is why Canadian collectors are usually disadvantaged when buying from US collectors. Even in the case where the overall distance between seller and buyer is shorter, as long as a package crosses national lines, the tariffs become significant.

Commercial shipping is, unfortunately, a little more complicated than someone shipping directly to the end-user after all. Trying to save on shipping becomes something that dealers try to do. One way of doing it is to take in the price difference and defray it on to the buyers, which is another reason why certain dealers have astronomical shipping/handling charges. Using land/water shipping is also a little cheaper than flying. But here is where the other conundrum lies – When a container tilts or falls into the water it’s considered lost. Recovery is a herculean task and it usually means the cargo in there is considered junked anyway (more information here: https://maritime-executive.com/editorials/what-happens-when-containers-are-lost-at-sea ) For smaller companies (BJDs are classified as micro-companies), they need to share containers with other people. This is something that’s actually badly controlled in China due to corrupt bureaucracy (so, once again, without taking sides, the OCDA™️ can vouch for what these guys said in this post to be true: https://www.facebook.com/BJDivas/posts/pfbid02tL96kt9R6vw546CZhe4V8EW7Fx7qqhx9NGzWjozVtbnqadR8yank69spfYjtMkn1l ) What they didn’t mention is what happens when a container falls over. While each container is insured, the value of the cargo is based on “What’s the declared content” and not “everything inside”. Imagine if a container that is filled with mostly clothes and it keels over, the insurance payout is relatively low due to the nature of -most- of its cargo. In that case, both the shipper and the receiver (the Dealer, in this case) incurs huge losses – a loss that cannot be defrayed on the final customer because they never received what they paid for.

As the child of parents who were importers and wholesalers, these intricacies of international shipping were something of a constant nightmare for us. You can imagine my surprise when I realised that the Chinese dealer ships to me for free… I was used the family business ordering enough stock to fill half a 50’ container about 6-12 months prior to it arriving. It’s the part of doing business that folks don’t really spend too much time thinking of, but it can really be at somewhere between 1/10 to 1/4 of the final MSRP. (If everything went well, of course. Because that’s not always possible for many, many reasons.) All of this need money, which means for a micro-company, the shipping is even more expensive. This is why while the labour cost in China is indeed quite low, the reason for the high price is -not- because of that.

Of course, the OCDA™️ would like to stress that while shipping is very difficult, it doesn’t fully absolve the dealer mentioned by the Exasperated Anon. There are a lot more things that could be done in terms of communication and streamlining the process. There’s just nothing for it. I’d like to extend my sympathy to anyone who feels that they are wronged by this dealer; heaven knows, I am one of you, too.

~Anonymous