#it should’ve been kara

[wildm00re]

every time i see this ss i think about how supercorp and karamel stans both went into the supergirl finale with this energy:

like they were each so confident that they were going to get last minute fan serviced (well the twitter side of the fandom was idk about anywhere else) like kara ending the show single wasn’t the most predictable part of the finale, especially after monel left the show and later came back married and any romantic storyline of hers wasn’t given as much attention afterwards

—which was fine by me seeing as the only kara ships i remember liking were silly little fanon ones (superwest, superlane, and superdreamer they didn’t get you like i did) but still sad when iirc kara really wanted to find her person </3

[fabuloustrash05]

Something I realized/headcanon rewatching TMNT 2012. When Karai goes in her war path against Shredder in the fourth season, it’s mostly said to her wanting (justified mind you) revenge, but I think it runs a bit deeper than that. Karai was raised in an environment where love and affection had to be earned and she had to be “worthy” of it. She also likely feels immense guilt for harming Splinter and her stepbrothers. I think her going after Shredder so hard was her trying to “make it up” to them

If I remember correctly that was actually stated in the show. Karai tells Splinter that she’s doing this so he’ll be proud of her, (something we actually see Shredder do to Karai in the earlier seasons with her doing everything she can to win his approval). Splinter dismisses her statement by telling his daughter that he’s already proud of her, but she still goes forward with her actions of revenge on Shredder because she’s convinced that justice must be served now.

Not to mention that Splinter even says that Karai’s need for revenge was something she got from Shredder not from him. A good example of nature vs nurture. Splinter (and even the Turtles) never wanted her to go on her path of revenge, but Karai feels that revenge is justified/needed for everything Shredder has done to her, her father Splinter, her mother, and her brothers the Turtles. 

Karai believes that she is the judge, the jury and the executioner all at once, blinded by her vendetta, that she cannot see it will take her and her family down a dark path of more suffering and pain .

[sazernac]

In reading your crimson update, it occurred to me how crazy it is that we have some many Supergirl fics out there but such a small fraction of red k Kara stories. Ans I get that it won’t be everyone’s cup of tea and there’s a certain depth into darkness you gotta get into if you want to tell an effective story. But it’s such a good plot device, especially in a post reveal setting. How do you think a red k incident would go in a post crisis setting?

Hmm…

If we go the romantic route, Lena makes some red k to make Kara lose her inhibitions and do some things (like railing her and maybe something murderous since she likes throwing people off of balconies ) that she would regret once she’s cured from it. All to give Lena some dark satisfaction for making Kara feel like shit because she hurt her. The plan back fires however because Kara now openly confesses her feelings for Lena which ultimately causes them to make up after some heavy angsty conversations in a very emotional, passionate, smut filled way.

Or…

Leviathan is winning at all their crazy games and in order to stop them, Kara decides to use Red K to defeat them but ends up temporarily joining them. Havoc ensues but she’s saved by the love of her life of course and while everyone turns their backs on Kara for some of the things she did, Lena sticks by her.

[lenakluthor]

they really just HAD to ruin season three by basically body swapping james and kara just to push fucking lames and make james look like the only person on lena’s side even though kara spent what? a year and half doing nothing but fighting for and championing lena’s goodness like WHY WE COULDVE HAD IT ALL WE HAD REIGN AND KARA AND LENA’S RELATIONSHIP COULDVE GOTTEN SO MUCH STRONGER BUT NOOOOO.

[fazedlight]

Bake

“I left cookies in the kitchen,” Nia said, walking into the main room of the Tower. Lena and Alex - who had been lounging on the couches - turned towards her. “Kara was in there, you guys may want to get some before she finishes them.”

“What type of cookies?” Alex said.

“Chocolate chip,” Nia said. “I was keeping it simple, trying out a new type of flour.”

“What type of flour?” Lena asked.

“Walnut,” Nia said, “It adds a bit of savory fla-”

But Nia cut herself off, noticing Alex half-jumping off the couch. “Walnuts?” Alex said, “Oh shit-”

Nia turned as Alex ran past her, glancing back to Lena who seemed just as confused as she was. The two followed Alex to the kitchen. “Hey Kara, don’t eat tho- Kara?”

The three entered the kitchen - but Kara wasn’t in it. The pile of cookies sat undisturbed, aside from three or so clearly missing from the top of the pile. “Oh no,” Alex said.

“What is it?” Nia asked worriedly. “Is she allergic?”

“No, it-”

“Wait,” Lena said, quieting the other two as she listened. 

Slowly, she tilted her head up to the ceiling.

There Kara was, floating upside-down, hands clasped over her mouth in a failed attempt to stifle her laughter. “You should’ve seen the looks on your faces!” she exclaimed, her speech a touch slurred as Alex placed her palm to her forehead.

--- “So she’s… drunk,” Lena said, sparing a glance to her best friend before looking for traffic on the dark street.

“More like high,” Alex said.

“I am so sorry,” Nia said, “I’ll try the pecan flour next time.”

The three struggled to shuffle Kara towards Lena’s condo - the closest place she could stay. Power dampeners adorned her wrists as she giggled hysterically, the trio exasperated as they nudged her across another street. “How long will it take to wear off?” Lena asked.

“She should be fine by morning,” Alex grumbled. “Thanks for taking her.”

“LOOK at the MOON!” Kara said, before bursting into laughter.

---

Luckily, Kara was docile for someone high on walnuts. 

The only incident had been the blonde giggling like mad over the lamps fixed to Lena’s ceiling, only to pout that she couldn’t float up to them. But Lena promised her that she’d be allowed to in the morning, which seemed to soothe Kara, and they both prepared for bed.

The kryptonian hadn’t seemed to mind the suggestion that they sleep in the same bed, for which Lena was grateful, not wanting to spend a night on the couch. Lena tried to ignore the hammering of her heart as she went about her normal routine, washing her face and brushing her teeth as Kara watched her with careful, warm eyes. “I wish you saw yourself how I see you,” Kara said quietly, her words still a bit slurred as Lena slipped into bed.

Lena sighed, curling up on the bed next to the blonde, pulling her blanket over their bodies. If her breath hitched with Kara’s warmth, Kara didn’t notice. “How do you see me?” Lena responded.

“Strong. Beautiful. Always trying to do the right thing,” Kara murmured sleepily, arms starting to wrap around Lena’s body as she nuzzled into her neck. “I really want to kiss you.”

Lena’s heart skipped a beat. Kiss me?

“Maybe someday I’ll tell you,” Kara breathed into her neck, before letting herself fall back slightly to sink into the bed, her eyes closing as she relaxed her grip, “That would be nice.”

Lena’s mind scrambled for what to say, and then she heard the kryptonian softly snoring.

---

Coffee.

Lena opened her bleary eyes, smelling the pleasant aroma of espresso. She noted the empty space in her bed, before throwing her blankets off, shuffling to her kitchen to find a pile of Irish scones and a very sheepish kryptonian. “Sorry for last night,” Kara said.

Lena could feel a flush creep on her cheeks as she took the coffee Kara offered across the table. “How much do you remember?” she asked.

“Almost none of it,” Kara confessed. “I just know I get really loopy on walnuts.”

Lena’s heart was already hammering as she sipped her drink, and she knew that was confusing to Kara. For a moment, she considered letting the whole thing go, but… dammit, I need answers. “Do you want to kiss me?” Lena asked.

Kara blinked back. “Is that… an offer?”

“No,” Lena said. “Well, yes?

“Um,” Kara said, shifting on her feet. “Which is it?”

“Yes,” Lena said firmly.

“Oh.”

Kara stared for a moment as Lena’s heart continued hammering in her chest, before finally stepping forward, cautiously making her way towards Lena as though she couldn’t quite believe what was happening. Lena swallowed nervously as Kara’s hand softly cupped her face. “So I did say something last night,” Kara murmured.

“I’m glad you did,” Lena murmured, a little breathless as Kara shyly smiled back.

Lena tilted her head, feeling the warmth of Kara’s body as she pressed in, feeling the tingling of breath against her lips. Lena wrapped her arms around Kara’s waist as Kara leaned closer.

And there was one last thought - thank god for walnuts - before Lena learned the taste of Kara’s lips.

[suzukiblu]

WIP excerpt for Plot Bunny; Kara gets to Earth on time and the Kents get a two-for-one special on free kids. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

“Ess, eer?” Ma says as she looks over, smiling kindly at Kal. His little face lights up and he waves his Krypto in the air again. 

“Krippo pie!” he says eagerly. “Pie pie! Krippo pie!”

Ma lets out a little laugh, blinking a few times like she’s trying not to tear up or cry. Kara doesn’t understand why. 

“Ess, eer,” Ma says, and comes over to pet Kal’s curls with a fonder, softer smile. “Aye-ull bee urr ‘Ma’ ong-ay yuu-nee.”

She walks over to the “fridd” and looks inside it, then comes back with a pan of the “cob-urr” she made yesterday. Kal shrieks in delight, clapping his hands together. 

“Pie! Pie!” he cheers, and Ma cuts him a tiny little slice and puts it on a plate–a rectangular slice on a circular plate, but Kara’s gotten used to that oddity in the aliens’ manners by now. They seem to like to contrast shapes, with their foods. And they’ll put multiple foods on one plate, which is an oddity in their manners that she is not used to. 

She should’ve done that, though–Kal should’ve known he could ask her for food if he was hungry. She should’ve gotten him food before he was even hungry enough to ask. But she was so busy wasting time on being sad that she wasn’t even paying attention to how long it’s been since “brekk-ist” or what Kal’s been doing or anything like that. 

She can’t do that kind of thing. 

Ma cuts another slice, this one bigger and square, and puts it on another round plate. 

She holds it out to Kara with an encouraging smile and says, “Ooo tuu, eer. Eet opp.”

Kara thinks about crying, but just takes the plate and tries to imitate Ma’s smile. She just . . . doesn’t know what to do about things like that. Ma just–she doesn’t need to be so kind to them, is all. 

Neither of them do. 

“Thann Ma,” she tries, not as sure as she’d like to be if that’s the right way to say “thank you, Ma” in the aliens’ language or not, and Ma’s smile both softens and widens. Pa looks up from their rustic little machine and smiles too, for some reason. They just both look–pleased. So, so pleased. 

Kara doesn’t really understand why they’re so pleased about just feeding them, though maybe they’re just pleased she’s been learning more of their language. It’ll be much easier for her to help with the farm, the more of it she learns. 

She thinks–she just thinks–

She’s not sure what she thinks, so she just helps Kal eat his “cob-urr” in tiny bites without making too much of a mess and takes a few bites of her own while he’s happily chewing and smacking his lips. It doesn’t taste like anything she ever tasted on Krypton, but neither does anything else she’s eaten on this planet. 

Or maybe it’s just that everything tastes different through the grief. 

Kal’s never had milk rice, she thinks vaguely. Never eaten any Kryptonian food at all. 

And he never will. 

She smiles at him, because he needs to see her smiling, and offers him another bite of “cob-urr”.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

End Game 3

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, stalking, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: Your gaming buddy asks to meet up but it doesn’t go exactly as planned.

Characters: Andy Barber

Note: and so it continues.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

When you find Kara, she’s at the front of the line. You wait impatiently on the other side of the rope as she gabs up a storm with the D-lister on the other side of the table. Restless, throat sour with bile, you pace in a small line, flicking your thumb as you resist the urge to tell her to hurry up. 

You need to get out of there. You can barely think. You can’t even stay still as heat scalds and speckles over your scalp and down your body. 

You turn on your heel and your feet tangle as you stop short. Andy stands just on the other side of the line, staring at you. Oh shit. 

You rush over to Kara and snap her tank top strap, “hey, there’s other people waiting.” 

“One second!” She squeals carelessly over her shoulder, quickly returning to fawning over the washed-up sci-fi actor. 

You sigh and cross your arms, rocking back and forth, “Kara, I really don’t feel good.” 

She huffs and chirps crisply, excusing herself from the table. Several others send her a dirty look for spending so much time chattering as they wait eagerly in the wings. She steps around the post to the other side of the rope. 

“Let me guess, too much sugar?” She scoffs. 

“Something like that,” you grumble. “Look, it’s like five. We’ve been here for a couple hours. I’m chill getting out of here.” 

“Already?” She lifts a brow, “we haven’t even got you a plushie.” 

“I should save my money,” you keep your arms folded around you. 

She eyes you up and down, “are you okay?” 

“Y-yeah, it’s like you said, too much sugar. I should’ve eaten breakfast. Or lunch.” 

She gives you a skeptical squint and shrugs, “alright, whatever. We can go hang at mine.” 

“Great, sorry,” you mope, “I just... I’m tired.” 

“It’s fine,” she assures you, “I get it. This place can be a bit much and the BO is starting to get to me.” She struts ahead of you and you catch up to her. She marvels at the signed photo in her hand, “at least I got something cool.” 

“Yeah, that’s awesome. You gonna hang it up?” You ask, trying to distract yourself. 

“Mm, maybe.” 

You glance over your shoulder. Andy’s closer, looming, hands in his pocket, eyes set on you. What is he doing? You grab her arm and hurry her towards the exit. 

“Woah, what’s up?” She trips in her wedged sandals. 

“I just need some fresh air. Like you said, it stinks in here.” 

As you finally get through the front doors, your phone is shaking incessantly. The buzz can be heard through the denim. You ignore it as you cross the lot. 

“Is that him calling?” She asks, “is that what this is about? I mean, I’d be pissed too but he shouldn’t get to ruin your day.” 

“No, it’s not,” you lie, “I just... crowds get to me after a while. It’s been a long day, traveling and all that... I’m tired.” 

“Mm, sure, well, let’s not let that coward shit on it all,” she snips. “It’ll be like high school. Girls’ night! Popcorn and nail painting and your favourite hollywood hunk.” 

“You mean your favourite,” you toss back. 

She giggles, “come on, you know you think he’s cute too.” 

You roll your eyes and stick close to her. You follow her out to the street and quickly turn away. You send one last look over your shoulder. You don’t think he’d follow you this far. You grab onto Kara’s arm and set your sights ahead of you. 

“Sleepover!” You chime, doing your best to hide your anxiety. 

🎮

You’re sad to leave Kara. She made a crummy day brighter with a fun night. Still, you’re relieved to go back home. Where you can be alone, where you can forget. 

You catch an early Greyhound and hug your bag to you as you doze, waking with each lurch of the axle. Back in town, you disembark and sigh. You still have a shift tonight. It’s a good excuse to avoid that little needling at the back of your mind. 

You still can’t believe it. How many years had you been warned against meeting people on the internet? For how much of your life has that faceless avatar online been the boogeyman to fear? And yet, he sent you pictures, you spent hours gaming together, and you trusted him. Yes, you’re that stupid. You really trusted Jacob—Andy. 

You drop your stuff at home and shower as your grandmother grumbles into a cup of tea. As you emerge, her eternal scowl curls her lips. You go to the kitchen to wash her used dishes and come back out, hoping the chore appeases her. She doesn’t say a word as she sorts through her knitting needles. 

Right. As grim as the house can be, you find comfort in that nothing has changed, even if you feel like your world has. You don’t even want to look at your Switch. That one possession you treasured above all. It’s the most expensive thing you own. You saved for months to get one, it connected you to outside, it helped you escape, and now it’s just another reminder. 

You grab your purse and head off for work. You message Kara to check in. Uh oh, she says Calvin is in town. Not this again. 

You go to hit reply on her message and another notification pops up. You tap it before you can stop yourself. It’s him. Andy. He’s been texting but you haven’t answered, you haven’t even looked to block him. You don’t know why you haven’t just hit that magic button but you just avoided everything about him. 

‘Please. I’m sorry. Can we please talk?’ 

It’s no different than the litany of texts before hand; ‘we can mine and talk this out’; ‘I wanted to tell you the truth for so long, I just thought you had the right to hear it face-to-face'; ‘hope you got home safe. Please text when you have a moment’; one after another, changing from one tone to the others; desperate, apologetic, concerned... 

Before you can dismiss the conversation, he messages again. 

‘You’re reading my messages. I see the checkmark. Please, just give me a chance to explain.’ 

You sniff and shake your head. You mute your phone and bury it at the bottom of your purse. You don’t want to talk to him but you just can’t bring yourself to get rid of him entirely. For a year he was your friend. Maybe just a gaming buddy but a constant that you came to count on.  

You would login and just shoot the shit; chat about your day; just let it all out and not think as you dug up diamonds or raced around Moo Moo Meadows. That’s all gone now and it hurts just as much as the rest of his lies. It isn’t just that he isn’t Jacob, it’s that you told him things you didn’t even tell Kara. He had been your safe harbour because he was far away, because anything you said could never come back to you. 

Your eyes sting and your cheeks pinch. Stupid, again. You shouldn’t be this emotional about this. Forget about it. You got work.  

Work? Scooping ice cream? God, how pathetic you must have sounded to him. He’s a lawyer or something? At least that what he claimed when he’d still been Jacob. You knew at first glance the type of man he is; established, professional, and older. So much older. 

Yeah, your problems must have seemed so minuscule and immature. Oh, you flunked a pop quiz? Not like you have to pay a mortgage.  

Urgh. You shake off the nipping embarrassment as you enter the booth and pull on your apron. Maybe you don’t have that much going on, but you’re trying. You’re young. You’re learning. What’s his excuse? 

🎮

You should have done this a lot sooner. You don’t know why you didn’t. Maybe because it didn’t matter before. Before, Jacob was just a boy you played Minecraft with. He was just a voice in a headset. But now, he’s... not. He’s Andy. No. 

He’s dead. 

You stare at the search result and your heart sinks. That, at least, is true. Jacob Barber; death date, last year. The pictures even match. Just a skinny kid, smiling beside his dad and mom. She’s gone too. Lost in the same accident. 

You kick yourself for being so careless. If you’d just searched him up a year ago. Even just reverse searched those pictures, you would’ve pieced it together. The only thing you can be thankful for is that it wasn’t worse. That you’re safe and you can just leave it behind. 

Well, that’s what you want to do. 

You scroll through the rest of the results. There's more, before the death. Articles about a murder and suspects. Jacob was one. What? 

It’s all so messy you can hardly make sense of any of it. You stop and sit back. You think of the man who sat across from you, you remember the look in his eyes, the flicker in his voice. He did sound sorry. 

And after everything? A police investigation then to just lose your son like that? Your only child. 

You know you don’t owe him anything. He lied to you. He had every chance to be honest, from the very beginning. Maybe you wouldn’t have wanted to play with a middle-aged man but maybe you could’ve helped him find somebody. You could’ve at least shared gaming tips.  

It isn’t about him. It’s about closure. This is just a blip on the radar. You have bigger things to worry about. Your grandmother, work, school. The summer’s flying by and tuition fees are higher than last year. Your interest payments are going to spike and you foresee a second job on the horizon. 

You look at your phone, entranced by it. You stand and walk in circles. You come back to your small desk and pick up the cell. The little chat bubble at the bottom has that red dot in the corner; unread messages. You tap it and the dot disappears. 

Jacob-- 

Andy’s chat opens and you slowly key in your message, several times over before you get it right. 

‘I’m signing into the server. I’ll be on until nine. No mining, talking.’ 

That’s it. That’s all. You can’t go back to what it was. You want this to be over. You’re closing the book, cutting the strings. He needs to know what he did was wrong and you need to move on. 

You take a breath and try to calm your nerves. Now that you’ve sent the message, you don’t know if you can do it. It’s too late, he saw it. 

You move slowly as you boot up your switch and plug in your headset. Your heart is racing like crazy. You’re going to have a panic attack. You feel the same wave of nausea you felt back at the con. Ugh. 

You load the server and almost as soon as the textures appear, he joins. Your lip trembles. You hear his mic scuff but he says nothing. No, you’re not here to listen to him. He has to hear you and then you’re done. 

“I’m sorry about your son,” you begin. 

“I... thanks.” 

“But it’s not an excuse,” you interrupt him, “what you did was so wrong.” 

“I know.” 

“Please, let me get this out,” you insist, your voice shaking. “I can’t understand what you’ve been through. I looked it all up and I know that it’s a lot. I, obviously, have never dealt with any of that. You know that, because I told you. Because I trusted you,” you frown as you inhale sharply, tears pricking in your eyes, “because I thought you were my age, that you were him, your son. Your dead son.” 

You shudder and shake your head, gulping thickly. 

“Do you not see how fucked up that is?” 

He sighs, “I know. I promise you, I wanted to tell you. That’s why... that’s why I wanted to meet. Because you deserved to know and I had to tell it to your face. You deserved that--” 

“Did I deserve to be lied to? Huh? Why—Why did you need to do all that? Why couldn’t you just tell the truth?” 

He sniffles. You’re silent, choked by the sob trapped in your throat. 

“I... He’s gone. I missed him so bad and I wasn’t thinking straight. It’s not an excuse, you’re right,” his voice is raspy, “I... you reminded me of him. Playing his favourite game helped me get through. It was wrong. All of it. I’m not saying you should forgive me, but I’m trying to explain as best as I can. I still don’t really understand why I did it.” 

You swallow and wipe your wet eyes, “you’re right. I don’t need to forgive you. I don’t. I only came on here to say what I needed to before I delete this world. I might be young and stupid but I think you need help. Real help, not some girl on a headset.” 

“Please--” 

His voice cuts off as you hit quit. You feel a pang of guilt. You do feel bad for him but you hope he heard you. You can’t forgive what he did to you, but you can wish the best for him. You hope what you said can make him get the proper help.

[tj-is-down]

Ten Dollars (Line Cook! Scott Miller x Reader)

Okay so somebody posted a headcanon of Scott Miller but as a line cook (I believe it was @glossykissies) and I literally cannot stop thinking about it. I've plotted a whole story about him in my brain, and this is but a small snippet and all I've put in words. Just a quick warning that this is not proofread and if you see an error I will cry. But I think it's cute! So here it is.

Summary: Reader gets a shitty tip from a customer, and Scott has something to say about it

Word count: ~950 (I'm sorry this is so short! But if it goes well I'll hopefully post more.)

Warnings: Swearing, that's really it. Insecurities, reader is compared to another (girl) character.

I walk into the kitchen and hand a bill to Scott. He glances up at me, only for a second, before flipping a few burgers on the grill top.

“Cooks don’t take tips,” he says plainly.

“He wanted me to give it to you, specifically,” I rebuttal, almost muttering in annoyance. If Scott notices, he doesn’t show it. “‘‘My compliments to the chef,’ or whatever.”

“Cooks don’t take tips,” Scott repeats, and he stops what he’s doing before moving onto something else. “Ten bucks? How much did he give you?”

I grumble. “Five.”

“Five?” Scott asks, slightly miffed. “Well, you should definitely keep it then. Five bucks? That’s like, barely twenty percent, even if he only ordered a kid’s meal.”

“He had two kids' meals,” I say, this time definitely muttering. Scott raises an eyebrow, and I nod my head towards the dining room. “Table thirteen, party of four. Parents and their two kids. Will you just take the ten, Scott?”

“I’m not taking the ten, Y/N. He looks over my head, through the kitchen window towards Table 13. “And you should’ve told me before they left. I would’ve gotten you a tip.”

“That’s why I didn’t tell you,” I say, a slight smile before pushing the money into his hands. “Take the money, Scott. I don’t want it.”

He pushes my hands back towards my torso. “I’m not taking it, Y/N. Especially after he stiffed you so much.”

“Fine,” I shrug indifferently. “I’m putting it in the register, then.”

He grabs my arm as I walk past him, both gentle and firm. His calloused hands are rough against my skin, and though he’s been by the grill all day he’s still cold enough for me to shiver. “Can’t do that. You’ll throw off the pull. Keep the money, Y/N. Seriously.”

I shake him off. “I don’t want it!” I almost shout, and a few of the servers walking past the two of us look over at me in surprise. Even Scott looks taken aback, showing more emotion than I’ve probably ever seen from him.

“What’s the deal?” He asks quietly. His tone is normal, neutral and calm as ever, but I can tell he’s worried, or at least curious.

I avoid his eyes. “Nothing.” I catch the attention of one of the other servers, Kara, as she walks into the kitchen.

“Hey, Kara,” I say, getting her attention. “I found a ten out in the parking lot. You want it? I know you’re saving up for school.”

Kara, though briefly confused, smiles as she takes the money from my hand. “Thanks, Y/N!”

“No problem,” I reply, satisfied. When she walks back out to the dining room I take off, refusing to look back at Scott. I hear him start to follow me, but one of the fryer timers goes off and he reluctantly turns his attention back to the kitchen.

I’m in the walk-in freezer for about three minutes before the door opens and Scott enters, eyebrows furrowed.

“Why are you hiding in the walk-in?” He asks.

“I’m not hiding” I reply, defiant. “I’m looking for something.”

“Which is?” When I don’t answer, he speaks again. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, Scott.”

“Are you sure? Because you just turned down free money.”

“So did you.”

“Cooks don’t take tips.”

“It wasn’t my tip to take.”

“It wasn’t Kara’s, either.”

“It probably would’ve been, had she taken the table.”

“Didn’t you say he only gave you five dollars?” His eyebrows furrow again, confused. “Bad tippers are bad tippers, regardless of who's giving them the food. He would’ve found a problem with Kara's service too.”

“Doubt it,” I mumble.

“Doubt it? Why’s that?”

“Come on, Scott,” I scoff.

“‘Come on, Scott,’ what? What am I missing?”

“There wasn’t an issue with the service. There was an issue with me.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Jesus, Scott. Look at Kara, look at me, and tell me who you think is getting better tips.”

Realization flashes across his face, and his eyes narrow. “You’re talking about how you look.”

I roll my eyes in exasperation. “Yes, Scott, I am.”

“Well, don’t. It’s bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit. It’s documented, and it’s true. Pretty servers get better tips, even if the quality of service is the same. It’s just how it is.”

“And you’re saying you’re not one of the ‘pretty servers’?” He puts air quotes around the words. When I nod, he grunts. “Fuck off.”

“Did you just tell me to fuck off?” I ask in angry surprise.

“I did.”

His double-down shocks me even more, but even more than that I’m angry. Angry at Scott for not understanding where I’m coming from, and angry at the whole system for being unfair, and angry at that guy at Table 13 for making me feel this way.

“Whatever, Scott. You’re a guy, and you’re you, so you wouldn’t get it.

I try to push past him to leave the walk-in, but he stops me. All of a sudden, in one quick, fluid motion, he’s bent down so our faces are on the same level, and he kisses me. He holds my cheek in one hand, my upper arm in the other, pulling me closer to him as seconds go by. I can’t tell how long we’re actually kissing for, but after a second-long eternity he’s pulled away from me, leaving me confused and wanting more. I don’t remember placing my hand behind his neck, but it falls back to my side as he stands up slowly.

“Stop saying you’re not pretty,” he says, simply. His eyes are focused on mine, making sure I understand how serious he’s being.

Before I can reply, he turns around and walks out of the freezer.

[hakethishere]

Where is Sam season 4 and post-Crisis?

I know it’s been brought up before, but Sam is a core relationship and person to Lena’s past. They are best friends “sisters” even and I refuse to believe her disappearance isn’t a massive plot hole. Let’s consider a couple of key moments Sam should’ve been brought up.

First and foremost season 4 Lex being released from prison?? Hello, your best friend’s maniac brother is on the loose, maybe a phone call would work. The irony of Lena snapping at Kara for not being there for her while Alex and even Supergirl were was also not lost on me.

Second, Lena finding out Kara is SUPERGIRL!!! To set the scene Lena finds out the her best friend is a kryptonian while Sam, her other best friend, had a wild awakening for being one as well a year before! There is literally no one better to talk to about whatever she was feeling than Sam. Moreover not only was Sam a kryptonian and knew and saw Supergirl’s struggles, but Sam was Reign!!! and for a while both Kara’s friend and Supergirl’s villain. She had front row seats to Supergirl’s hypocrisy and her poorly played split personality. To top it all off Lena had lied to Sam for her own good in order to protect Sam and because she doesn’t really trust people which was obviously not the same situation as with Kara but still, we can see some similarities that they could’ve talked about. But instead of doing so, Lena builds an AI puts it in Eve Tesmacher’s body OF ALL PEOPLE to serve as her emotional support/sounding board. (I refuse to believe that actually happened)

Third, Lena brings Andrea back into her life?! If you ever had a best friend I’m sure you’d have some reticence before allowing said best friend to bring a toxic lying ex back into their lives for god sake. Like no matter what, that decision should’ve been double checked. I love the Lena backstory with Andrea it really thickens the plot, but if I was Sam I would’ve given Lena a quick reality check on why that was a bad idea.

Fourth!!!! Post-Crisis!!!! Okay so reality changed and let’s say maybe Sam and Lena never met. But Lena kept her memories, and as (a platonic best friend according to the writers) Kara checks/makes sure that Lena remembers their complicated history first thing after saving the world, why on earth prime wouldn’t Lena do the same with Sam if they are so best friends and so platonic. But let’s say they indeed didn’t meet, I have even more questions. How did the Harun-El come to life? Was Sam Reign? Did they save her and then just moved on? how did they even realize she was Reign. And if Sam was not Reign how in the world did she get to Earth and what in the world was with the witches of the cult popping up 5th season. Will Sam become Reign? is she dormant? I have so many questions that Lena, Alex, Brainy, Kara should have too!

Side notes to that argument I have:

Lena saying every one of her friends has betrayed her in the past when Sam never did

There’s some sort of excuse the writers could give, like if Lena already had a best friend that was there for her in every sense of the word while making big sapphic eyes at Kara and going through a sapphic tragedy when Kara lied to her then well that couldn’t have been platonic could it?

Ruby and Esme. There’s absolutely no way Lena did not think of Ruby especially when Esme came around I just refuse to believe so.

[karaspal]

three times kara told nia “you have me”. each time, a different part of kara’s identity.

first time, it was kara zor-el, because she wanted to assure nia that she’s not alone. that someone understood her. kara allowed nia to see her true, full self. she trusted her friend and wanted to make her feel less alone.

second time, it was her friend kara danvers who assured her she’d always be there for her when she needed someone to lean on. nia was grieving and having that support from a friend was really important.

third time, it was her crime-fighting partner supergirl. for the first time in her superhero career, dreamer was faced with a problem she couldn’t tackle on her own. it was important for her to know that she didn’t have to, that she’ll always have someone to stand with her against injustice.

i’m so grateful for their friendship on the show and it’s a shame they didn’t develop them even further. they truly brought out the best in each other.

[callsign-muffin]

Heal Together: Chapter 7 (Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw fic)

Hi Friends! I have another chapter here! I hope y'all like it!

Again, every single like, comment, and reblog of my writing means soooo much to me. Thank you so much to all of you for even reading my stuff! It means the world!

Masterlist + Playlist

Content warning: death, discussion of dying and grief

Word Count: 2.2k+

Ah, ah, ah, ah, stayin’ alive, stayin’ alive… You sang in your head as you gave chest compressions with all your strength. You felt the unmistakable sensation of your patient’s ribs cracking under your weight. Though it took less than a minute for your coworkers to arrive to assist you in the code, it felt like a lifetime. The other nurses worked around you like a well oiled machine, applying the defibrillator pads and starting rescue breaths. Every muscle in your body was burning as you continued pushing on this man’s chest.

“Tap out, Y/N. I have the next round.” Carly said from behind you.

During the pause for two breaths, Carly jumped into your place with ease and took over seamlessly.

The code team arrived shortly thereafter, you quickly gave the rundown of the situation to the physicians. They went to work quickly intubating, ordering meds to be pushed, and watching the flat line of asystole. Despite everyone’s best efforts, after 20 minutes of pushing medications, ventilating, and chest compressions… there was no heart rhythm to be shocked.

“Time of death: 4:26.” Kara, a young resident said flatly.

Everyone ceased their assigned activities and took a big deep breath then slowly dispersed from the room.

You spoke softly through the lump in your throat, “Carly, can you open the window to your left?”

You stayed later than you should have, not leaving the unit until 8:30AM. You had to debrief the code with the team, do post mortem care, and make sure the docs filled out a hell of a lot of paperwork. Carly stayed with you after handing off her patient to the day team, cutting the time in half. You two finished out your shift by taking the body down to the morgue… what a way to end your work day.

“Why did you ask me to open a window when they called it?” She asked, finally breaking a long stretch of silence as you walked to the parking garage.

“It’s something I do after a patient expires. I had a preceptor tell me that it’s a way of allowing the patient’s spirit to pass on to a better place.” You explained quietly, “It’s just become a part of my nursing practice. If there’s no window in the room, I make sure the door remains open for a little while.”

Carly sighed, “That’s really lovely, Y/N… you did right by him. Even though his family should’ve signed the DNR when given the opportunity… it’s just wrong that we had to do that to him.”

You nodded, “I think family members don’t realize just how violent resuscitation is. If they knew, they’d never have let his life end like that.”

“What are you doing when you get home?” She asked.

You stopped at your car, “Cry the whole way home, take a shower, and go to sleep.”

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

Y/N never answered Rooster’s good morning text. He assumed it was busy at the hospital and that he’d see an answer when he finally got a chance to check his phone at lunch, however, there was radio silence. Weird. Luckily, he checked his instagram and saw he’d received a DM from Carly.

Carly_Pope: Hey Bradley, I wanted to let you know that Y/N had a really tough shift last night. Her patient ended up dying this morning and she seems pretty torn up about it. I just wanted to let you know so that you can check in on her if you want. I know you care about her a lot.

Rooster’s heart sank. It’s no wonder Y/N hadn’t answered his text, he was the least of her concerns at the moment. He remembered her telling him how hard it was on her to take care of patients who never get better; how it was burning her out. It was evident when she was his nurse that Y/N cared so deeply about her patients. He knew she must have been absolutely crushed. He answered Carly’s DM, thanking her for the info and then quickly texted Y/N.

Bradley: Hey Y/N, a little bird (Carly) told me you had a really tough shift last night. I hope you’re getting some decent rest and taking care of yourself. If you want, I can come over after work with some food and give you some company after I get off at 5. We can talk about it or not at all, whatever you want. 

He knew Y/N was probably still sleeping, this was her last night of three in a row. He didn’t expect an answer right away; she must have been exhausted. A couple hours later, his phone buzzed in his pocket.

Y/N <3: I like pizza. 

A few hours later, Bradley pulled up to her apartment with two pizzas in hand. One pepperoni and one cheese, just in case Y/N was a secret vegetarian or hated pepperoni. After a soft knock on her door, the door swung open and she B-lined straight into his arms, almost making him drop the pizzas. He quickly shuffled them into the apartment, placed the boxes down, and then fully embraced her with both arms.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N…” he kissed the crown of her head and whispered softly.

Her face was buried in his chest, he could feel her tears saturate his cotton shirt. But she still remained quiet, no sobbing or shaking. Just silent tears.

“He should’ve been able to die in peace,” she sniffled, “not with me slamming my entire body weight into his chest. He was 93, he deserved peace.”

Bradley gently stroked your hair, “It must have been so awful.”

She looked up at him, resting her on his chest, “We tried to tell the family he was never going to get better. We told them the kind thing to do was to let him die comfortably and peacefully. But they refused to sign the paperwork, they were convinced we could save him… We couldn’t save him. Keeping him alive felt cruel… But my hands were tied.”

Bradley gently wiped the tears from her face with his thumbs, “I can’t imagine, Sweetheart.”

“I’m just so tired, Bradley.” She whispered, “I’m so tired of watching people suffer… and sometimes even causing them to suffer.”

“Look at me,” he cradled her cheeks in his hands, “You do not cause suffering. You alleviate suffering. I can say that with 100% certainty because I’ve experienced your care. You stopped my suffering and made me want to get well.” 

A soft whimper escaped Y/N’s lips, which then turned into sobs. 

“When was the last time you ate something?” He asked, walking you to your living room couch.

“Around… midnight.” She sniveled through her sobs.

Bradley placed his hands on your shoulders, guiding you to sit down on the couch, “I’m going to get you some pizza and you’re gonna sit your pretty little butt here and eat.”

You opened your mouth to argue but he cut you off.

“That wasn’t a suggestion,” he said, “I’m taking care of you now.”

█ ✪ █▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█ ✪ █

You laid across your couch with your head in Bradley’s lap, he played with your hair gently as the TV hummed quietly in the background.

“I’m sorry for breaking down like that.” You whispered quietly.

Bradley shook his head, “You have nothing to be sorry for, Sweetheart. Your grief and frustration were completely justified… There’s nothing worse than watching someone suffer.”

“Especially when they don’t have to.” You added, “I think families don’t realize how keeping someone that sick and fragile alive does more harm than good… it’s a disservice to them.”

Bradley’s eyes got glassy, filling with tears, “You’re right.”

You sat up from his lap so you could look at him straight on, “Your mom was sick, wasn’t she?”

He nodded, “Pancreatic cancer, basically a death sentence. But she put up a good fight until she couldn’t anymore, until it was hurting her more than it helped.”

“Was she able to go peacefully?” You asked.

“Yeah…” his voice cracked, “She was on hospice at my aunt’s house in Virginia Beach. She asked us to take her out to see the ocean one last time and we did, even though it was cold as balls in November. We took her wheelchair to the shoreline and she got her feet wet one last time… then a couple hours later, as the sun was setting, she passed in bed with me, my aunt and the nurse by her side. The family grew very close to her, my mom’s nurse, Heather. She still sends me Christmas cards.”

You placed your hand on Bradley’s shoulder softly, “I’m so sorry you lost her. But I’m glad your mother got the peace she deserved and you made it happen for her.”

“C’mere sweetheart.” He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into his lap, “You always know just what to say.”

With your thumb, you gently wiped his tears from his cheek, “Now, I’m not sure about that… I’m just calling it like I see it.”

He sighed and took a moment to look at you, “You’re so beautiful.”

“Are you sure about that?” You looked down at your outfit of a ratty t-shirt and gym shorts and gestured towards the messy top-knot on your head.

He smiled so widely, the corners of his eyes crinkled, “Just calling it like I see it.”

You and Bradley passed out on the couch around one in the morning. Still slightly nocturnal from 3 night shifts in a row, you woke up around five before the sun started to rise. You turned to look at Bradley as he slept peacefully beside you, his usually bright and animated face was completely relaxed. It took everything in you don’t to run your fingers gently along the scars on his beautiful face, you desperately wanted to know how they got there. You desperately wanted to know everything about him, honestly. Still nestled into his side, you grabbed your phone to see missed texts from your mom, best friend from college, and your group chat with Carly, Madi, and Sam. You pulled up your email to see a subject line, Request for Interview. Holy shit. Sharp Hospital for Women and Newborns wanted to interview you for your dream job?! You had to read it multiple times to believe it. You bit your lip to stay silent so that Bradley could continue to snooze beside you; it took everything in you not to gasp out loud. With all the excitement running through your veins, you were unfortunately unable to go back to sleep, despite your best efforts. You slipped off the couch slowly, so as to not disturb the sleeping man beside you and found some quiet chores to do around your apartment. You couldn’t help but smile so hard your cheeks hurt as you folded laundry quietly on the living room floor.

You didn’t realize it, but you were humming along to the music in your headphones as you cleaned up the kitchen. It was dirty not only from the night before, but from the string of night shifts before that. Bradley initially woke up to the sun beaming across his face from your living room window but once he heard your quiet humming, he didn’t want to fight it and go back to sleep. He sat up slowly, watching you as you danced around the kitchen with your back to him, swinging your hips and wiping down the counter. He needed to get his hands on you, now. You were pulled out of your own little world when you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist, making you let out a startled squeal.

“What’s got you dancing around like that, Sweetheart?” His mustache tickled your neck with every word he spoke.

You took out one of your headphones, “Queen Dolly Parton.”

“You love that country music.” He rolled his eyes.

You turned around to face him, confused, “I’ve never listened to country music with you.”

Bradley chuckled, “You don’t remember the day we met? In the hospital? When I had that damn tube down my throat and you were bathing me, you were playing Kenny Chesney.”

“Was I?” You asked, shocked that he remembered.”

He nodded, “I couldn’t even open my eyes because of the sedatives, but I just remember hearing the music and thinking to myself ‘Who the fuck listens to Kenny Chesney anymore?’”

You gasped and swatted him playfully, “Hey! When the Sun Goes Down is a classic! Don’t be a hater!”

“You and Hangman have more in common than I thought with your yeehaw music.” He rolled his eyes.

You broke free from his arms and grabbed your phone, “That’s it! Dolly’s going on the speaker. You’re gonna learn today, Bradshaw!”

The intro to Islands In the Stream started playing and a smile spread across Bradley’s face.

“I know this song,” He said, “My mom and dad used to dance to this…”

You took his hands in yours, “Well let's make like your folks and dance.”

“You are something else, Y/N.” He whispered in your ear, pulling you closer, and swaying to the music. 

You softly sang the lyrics in his ear as the two of you danced in the morning sunlight without a care in the world.

Tag list:

@sarah-bear706318

@dizzybee03

@that-gay-person-27

@alwayshave-faith

@caitsymichelle13

@thespillingvoid

@shanimallina87

[elffees]

“Kara x Luther being a romance would be regressive in regards to feminism given Kara is the only female protagonist of the three, and it’s a misogynistic trope that women must always have a heterosexual romance.”

vs

“Luther x Kara being a romance would be progressive in regards to race given that Luther is one of the few dark skin Black characters in the game with a prominent role, and it’s a racist+colorist trope that dark skin Black characters have to be inherently undesirable, especially when not in a sexual setting. That they must be tools to be used by lighter skin characters, rather than persons of interest themselves.”

And

“David Cage wrote for a majority of Kara’s chapters to be about her being in the proximity of dangerous men. Todd, potentially Ralph, Connor, Zlatko, the police officer at Rose’s house. Kara’s main goal being the care of herself and a little girl without focusing on a man subverts all of that and keeps women & girls at the forefront of Kara’s story, despite the abundance of dangerous men they encounter.”

vs

“David Cage writes women atrociously and boxed Kara into the ‘mother’ role who has no other goals or desires or interests outside of caring for a child. Kara x Luther would add another element to Kara’s character development, and show that mothers can have desires outside of their children. That her personhood doesn’t stop simply because she has a child. There would be power in Kara pursuing a relationship outside of motherhood, and choosing to be with someone that is kind and gentle after repeated encounters of the opposite.”

And

“Regardless of everything else, Kara should’ve been able to have goals outside of her relationship with others. Markus’ story is primarily about him and the movement towards progress. Connor can choose to ‘remain a machine’ or ‘become a deviant’ regardless of his relationship with Hank and Amanda. But Kara’s entire storyline is dedicated to her relationship with others with little to no reflection on herself as an individual. She deserved more.”

Are all statements that can and should co-exist.

[biblomaniac]

Kara’s jealous of Lena’s relationship with James. What happens when she learns what’s really been going on?

——————————

Kara regrets ever telling Lena to date James. At the time, she thought it would be bad of her as a friend to not support Lena, but dear Rao, she hates seeing them together.

It’s been months of them dating. Lena doesn’t share a lot about their relationship to Kara, or to anyone for that matter. They seem happy, or at least comfortable with one another, but something about seeing them together irks at the Kryptonian.

And to be honest, it’s more than just Kara having feelings for Lena. At first, Kara thought jealousy skewed her perception; that she was looking for issues where there were none. She’s come to terms with the fact that she’ll always love Lena, that Lena will never care for her back, but she cannot let go of the nagging thought that something was wrong about Lena dating James.

When Kara first met Lena, James was one of the staunchest opposers to their budding friendship. Even a year later when Lena purchased CatCo, James was more than weary of not only her last name, but her presence in general.

Then, all of the sudden, James is attracted to Lena? Wanting to date her as if he had not vehemently rejected even the very idea of her, minimized her individuality, labeling her as just another Luthor.

It makes no sense. Illogical in every form of the word, but Kara bit her tongue, trying to be the best friend she could to both parties.

It isn’t until Lena starts pulling away from Kara that she actually begins to watch how James and Lena interact.

At CatCo, it’s very professional. They don’t spend extended amounts of time alone and Lena certainly doesn’t play favorites. One of Lena’s main concerns before they started dating was the fact that she is James’s boss, so this makes sense.

I assume it’s the same at L-Corp. I mean, I’ve never seen or heard James there apart from when he was supposed to look in Lena’s vault.

Speaking of the vault, damn did Kara screw that situation up. She should’ve just trusted that Lena didn’t have any more kryptonite. She should’ve trusted her reason for why she had kryptonite. The PTSD from previous exposure has certainly clouded her mind a bit. She knew Lena had never wanted to hurt her and yet, she let her emotions lead her. Sending Guardian to essentially break in was her most reckless act of jealousy to date. It drove a bigger wedge between Supergirl and the youngest Luthor that Kara fears they’ll never recover from.

It’s right after this debacle that Lena begins to cancel movie nights and lunches out with Kara. It’s gradual at first. Kara knows the CEO is much too busy to make it to every one of their plans, and on more than one occasion, Kara herself has had to call for a rain check. But when the rescheduled dates turn into cancellations and rejections, Kara does start to take it personally.

It has to be me, right? She still comes to game nights and out to drink once in a while, but it’s like she doesn’t leave James’s side.

The blonde sees an opening one evening while the brunette is refilling glasses in the kitchen. While the others are busy arguing over what game to play next, Kara slips into the kitchen, leaning against the counter next to Lena.

Kara isn’t quite sure how to start the conversation. She stands there for a moment picking at her fingers before blurting out a rushed, “Are you okay?”

The brunette pauses in her reach for another bottle of beer. It’s the only indication in her body language that Lena has heard her.

“I’m fine,” she says plainly, resuming her task.

“Are…are we okay?” Kara asks next.

“What do you mean? Of course we’re okay,” she replies dismissively.

“I dont, I mean… did I do something to offend you?”

Lena must see something she doesn’t like in Kara’s pleading eyes. Her shoulders loosen and she breathes out a soft sigh.

“I haven’t meant to be distant. It’s just…James made some comments about me not spending enough time with him. I’ve been trying to make it up, but in the process I’ve hurt you. I’m sorry, Kara. Truly.”

Lena sounds apologetic and Kara can’t really fault her. She’s been in that position before with Mon-el; wanting to please a partner can sometimes make maintaining other relationships difficult for a time.

“It’s okay; I understand. Don’t worry about it,” Kara assured her, laying a hand on Lena’s arm for a moment before helping her carry the drinks back to the living room.

I should just be patient. It’s only been a few months; everything will go back to normal soon.

*************

It’s been two more months, and somehow Kara feels the situation has gotten worse. Lena has just become plain dodgy. She hardly accepts Kara’s calls, answers texts vaguely, and on the rare occasion she sees her in person, it’s only been with James wrapped around her.

Kara tries to mind her business, knowing it can be intrusive to listen in on people’s private conversations. Yet, she doesn’t need super hearing or x-ray visions to see how tense her friends always seem.

James puts on the cool guy exterior; calm, collected, confident. But Kara can pick up micro expressions even the most trained specialists couldn’t decipher. The looks were usually in relation to Lena. Whether it be her jobs, businesses, opinions, or her family, James always seemed to be irked by her.

Kara hated it.

She hated every second of seeing them together. It reminds her of the start of her friendship with Lena; James vehemently opposed to Kara befriending the young Luthor.

Every time the thought crossed her mind, she feels her heart beat increasing and a minimal tinge of heat vision creeping behind her eyes. Many glasses have been the victim of her temper lately. More than once, she’s had to excuse herself from group settings to cool down.

Alex thinks it’s just Kara being overprotective, that she’s reading too much into it and being too sensitive. But Kara knows in her heart that James and Lena aren’t right for one another. She doesn’t want to overstep by inquiring about it with Lena (that’s if she would even give me the time of day to talk), so she watches as the love of her life slowly fades from her reach into the arms of another, praying to Rao Lena will return to her one day.

*************

Though it has been several weeks and the Children of Liberty have gone underground for now, Kara is still reeling from her near-death experience on Shelly Island. She felt such undeniable rage at James for getting them both in that situation. She may have accepted his apology, but her trust in him is broken indubitably.

The moment James dawned the mantle of Guardian, Kara knew it would never work out. It was clear he felt inferior, that he needed the adrenal rush of danger to feel like he was making a difference.

This is exactly why I didn’t want humans acting as vigilantes.

Kara tries to keep her “god complex”, as Lena so eloquently said, in check. It’s not her place to police humans, but dear Rao, has is been more of a hassle to have another vigilante in the mix.

Not only has he been more of a hindrance in the field, now that he’s making headlines by revealing his identity and essentially co-signing the Children of Liberty, he’ll never be fully safe. If not for Lena, he would’ve been charged and arrested.

He hasn’t even thought about his friends and family. About Lena. It would be more than easy for the public to associate his alliance with the Children of Liberty and their anti-alien rhetoric with the Luthors. Hadn’t Lex put her through enough? Hadn’t he seen how his actions could be a trigger for Lena?

It’s incredibly hard for Kara to remain impartial. To keep her thoughts to herself as everyone else goes on about their lives while hers remains stagnant.

Now that she has a better handle of her duties as a reporter and a hero, she is able to better manage her time when she gets to be just Kara. With her group of friends being pulled in so many directions, and without Lena to spend a lot of one on one time with, she’s beginning to pick up hobbies she once had to set aside in favor of being Supergirl.

Kara busies herself painting at human speed. It’s a calming ritual that helps her to unwind after especially hard days as a hero, or trying days as a reporter.

She focuses on the color theory of her work, deciding which shade of maroon best complements the beryl eyes of her muse. Just as she goes to mix the next set of colors on a clean palette, there is a knock at the door.

I wonder who that could be.

Kara rises from the stool by the window, turning her easel to face the wall before crossing the room to open the door.

The sight that greets her is unexpected. Lena stands in front of her, tears streaming down her red face. Her nose is running, cheeks blotchy, and hair loose. Kara’s never seen her quite so distraught.

“Hey, what’s wrong?!” Kara asks worriedly. Lena only sobs in response, raising a hand to cover her mouth as if surprised by her own response.

Kara ushers her inside, trying to think of a reason for why Lena could be crying so profusely. Closing the door behind her, Kara reaches toward Lena to comfort her. Just as her hand makes contact with Lena’s arm, the brunette jerks away violently holding her arm across her chest. Her eyes are crazed, open wide and bloodshot.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

Kara doesn’t know what to do. She’s never had to help someone so hysterical. “Lena, what’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”

“N—no. I’m sorry,” she cries backing away until she hits the wall.

Kara takes two steps back. She hold her hands out in front of her, trying not to come off as a threat.

“Breathe, Lena,” she instructs. “You have to calm down.”

Lena tries to slow her breathing, but she can’t catch her breath. All she can hear is the yelling, the snide remarks about her name, feel the press of the wall against her back and hands tight on her arms.

“Lena. Lena! Look at me, baby, can I come closer?” Kara just wants to wrap the brunette in her arms, but she knows from experience that too much too fast can be detrimental in moments like this.

She waits for Lena to answer, to give just one sign of acknowledgment to Kara’s request. All she receives is a jolted nod of acceptance before the brunette is slipping onto the floor. Kara walks closer slowly, approaching her friend like a scared animal. When she is just two feet from the brunette, she drops to her knees.

“Lee, can I touch you?”

She whimpers, face twisted in fear.

What in Rao’s name happened to her?

“Look, match my breathing.” The reporter begins a round of exaggerated breaths, trying to get Lena to breathe in and out with her. It works marginally; Lena finds the rhythm but the breaths are too shaky to be providing any real comfort.

Kara inches closer on her knees, “Good, you’re doing so well, baby. Here, put your hand on my chest. That’s it; good girl.” Her voice is low and soothing, words infused with a calm she herself doesn’t even feel right now.

Lena reaches out with a trembling hand to rest her palm against the hero’s chest. Kara notes that the arm she reached for earlier is still clutched tightly to the CEO’s chest, as if protecting an injury. Kara covers the hand against her chest with her own. She holds it there lightly to showcase the cadence of her own breathing. Her thumb rubs soothing circles against the soft skin of Lena’s hand.

They sit there, cramped on the floor of Kara’s loft for quite some time. When Lena finally catches her breath, her hand tightens on the collar of Kara’s sweater, using the hold to pull herself into Kara’s chest.

The blonde opens her arms for the crying woman, allowing her to crawl into her lap. The shorter woman tucks her head into Kara’s neck, legs pressed tightly to her own chest. She crowds herself into Kara small, small, small, as if she alone could block out the horrors of the world.

“Lee—“

The brunette shakes her head, apparently not ready to speak. Her sobs have hushed to a silent stream of tears falling down her cheeks, but the blonde can still hear the erratic beat of her heart. Kara wraps her arms around the smaller woman, holding her close but not tight enough to constrict.

“I’m gonna stand, okay? Just going to the couch. It’s more comfortable.”

Kara positions Lena better so that she can stand. The hold is awkward with Lena balled up as she is, but it’s no real trouble for the girl of steel. Lena holds tighter, seemingly ready for the short travel to the couch. Kara lowers herself slowly, rather than plopping as she usually does. The reporter sits there, murmuring quiet assurances to Lena. Before long, she feels the body in her arms going limp. Checking her heart, the hero finds it steady, the lub-dub much calmer than when she first arrived.

Kara doesn’t dare to move, wanting to allow Lena the chance to rest after her ordeal. Many scenarios cross Kara’s mind. There isn’t much that truly shakes Lena. When the brunette whimpers, Kara starts to card her fingers through dark locks. She immediately calms under Kara’s gentle caress.

She sleeps for a while longer. Kara continues her ministrations even once Lena rouses. The hero hears her breathing change, but she doesn’t speak until Lena does.

“I’m sorry,” she says into Kara’s chest. Her voice in muffled against the soft material of Kara’s paint-spattered sweater.

“What for?”

“Coming here. I didn’t mean to disrupt your evening, especially after I neglected your text to hang out.”

“Lena, I don’t care about that. You are always welcome here,” Kara assures.

Lena doesn’t reply. She just lays in the safety of her best friend’s arms. Kara allows her a moments peace before addressing the obvious elephant in the room.

Her voice remains calm and even, “Lena, tell me what’s wrong.”

Silence.

“Did something happen today?”

Silence again.

“Lena. You have to work with me here. I know something is wrong. I want to help you, but you have to let me in,” the reporter admonishes lightly, “I want to help you, in any way you need. You just have to let me in.”

A shaky exhale escapes the scientist before she removes her head from Kara’s chest. Her eyes never meet the blondes, but she can absolutely feel her pointed stare as she rolls up the sleeve of her left arm.

The purpling bruises painting her alabaster skin look worse in the hours following their placement. They trail up her arm in ribbons of finger prints. Kara is silent, but Lena feels her body tense into the hardness of a rock.

The brunette glances up at the tanned face of her friend. The first thing she notices is the absence of Kara’s trademark glasses. From her position, she can’t see the entirety of her face, but the hard set of the reporters jaw indicates a great deal of anger. Blue eyes remain focused on Lena’s arm, her free hand moving to trace one mark carefully.

“Who did this?”

The infliction of her voice, it’s so…familiar. It doesn’t sound like the soft upbeat tone the bubbly blonde usually has. The timbre is husky, a low gruff that has the potential scare Lena if it was directed at her.

“Lena. Tell me who did this,” Kara repeats, turning her head so that stormy blue meet glassy green.

Features she’s memorized over the last three years look off. There is something about Kara in this moment that clashes with the image in her mind. Lena doesn’t answer her; only continues to search Kara’s face for the inconsistencies her mind is fighting to recognize.

Kara is growing impatient, she wants to make whoever did this to her beloved pay. She moves her hand to Lena’s jaw, pulling her closer ever so gently. Only inches remain between the two.

“Tell me who hurt you, please,” she whisperers. It’s so soft compared to her tone just a moment ago. A gentle breeze following the tempest of her earlier pleas.

Mismatched eyes flutter closed, silent tears leaking slowly. The broken explanation she delivers is hushed, voice cracking and devolving into choked whimpers every so often.

“He got so upset; angry. I told him it wasn’t right. That he was endangering so many with this facade. He didn’t care; accosted me for not siding with him. I went to leave and he grabbed me. It startled me. All I could see was Lex’s angry face spitting in mine as he raved about aliens and their inferiority, Lillian slapping me for misbehaving, Lionel…”

Kara can’t bear to hear the rest. She places her forehead on Lena’s, pulling the brunette back into the safety of her own body. The urge she has to protect Lena calls to a violent part of herself that she hadn’t experienced since being poisoned with Red Kryptonite all those years ago.

“Shhh. I got you. I’ll fix it. Tell me who did this and I’ll make sure it never happens again.”

The whimpering CEO spits out the answer as if it burned her tongue with its utterance, “J—James.”

Son of a bitch.

He’s finally crossed the line.

There are a lot of things Kara isn’t proud of. Not making it to Earth to raise Kal-el, hiding her alien-ness, failing to observe the all the Kryptonian rites and holidays she’s missed over the last 14 years on Earth. In this moment, she regrets two things more than all the others combined: hiding her identity to Lena, and not putting a stop to this relationship sooner.

“Rao, I’m so sorry—“

Lena feels like her heart has stopped. Her emerald eyes shoot open to stare directly into icy blue. There was only one other time, one other person, who she heard that desperate mention from. This can’t be happening. What the fuck have I gotten myself into.

“S-supergirl?” She stutters, mouth falling open minutely. The pieces connect like a puzzle, fitting in seamlessly with countless memories and quotes: how she could effortlessly carry Lena across the room, the voice, all the excuses to leave lunch early, even “I flew here…on a bus.”

She tries to untangle herself from the hero, but Kara’s strength holds her pretty much in place. “God, I’m an idiot. You… you lied to me! Was this all fake; part of a plan? Did you know this would happen?!” Lena is crying in earnest, voice pitched high and a tremble of fear underneath the thin veil of anger.

“No! I would never do that; you know me, Lena—“

“No I don’t!” She protests, but they fall on deaf ears. She continues her struggle against the impenetrable blonde, becoming erratic at the feeling of being trapped, “Let me go! Let me go!”

Kara gently deposits the woman on the couch. She kneels before her, hands on the couch bracketing both sides of her thighs. “Okay, okay. Please, just listen to me. I was going to tell you. But I got scared. You were already so distant because of James; I didn’t want you be leave me. I’m sorry I lied. I thought I was protecting you.”

Lena immediately protests the statement, “How could you be protecting me? I was already in danger; I have been since the moment I met the Luthors.”

“It feels like every time someone else finds out, everyone who knows becomes open to more danger. I don’t want that. Especially for you.”

Tears still fall, but their flow turns from raging rapids into steady streams. “Why are you saying this? You told me you wouldn’t trust a Luthor with your name.”

“I didn’t mean that—“

“Yes you did! You were angry at me, and you said it to be cruel.”

“Lee, I didn’t mean it. I swear I didn’t! I was hurt, and I lashed out. I’m sorry,” Kara says placing her hands into Lena’s knees and leaning up into her space.

“Don’t lie to me.” She whispers brokenly. The day has been too long, too hard. The earnestness in Kara’s eyes is alluring. So different from the spark of hate and loathing James’s had earlier. The fight drains out of her when the Super presses their foreheads together.

“I’ll never do it again. I’ll tell you everything: about me, about Krypton, how I got to Earth. Khap vrreiahv vo rrip, i shokh nim i.”

I promise to you, my truth is yours.

Lena’s face feels wet, but she doesn’t know if it’s her tears or Kara. “I—I can’t trust you,” she whimpers, voice choked and mouth dry.

“You don’t have to. I wouldn’t deserve it even if you did. I promised to protect you, and I failed. Just let me help you,” Kara avows, running the tip of her nose along Lena’s, around her regal cheek bones and to the shell of her ear.

“I’ll fix this,” she pledges, “You are my everything.”

You are my everything.

The brunette sinks down, holding herself to Kara with her uninsured arm as tightly as she can. “Don’t hurt me. I can’t bear it.”

Kara hugs her back, pressing kiss after kiss to Lena’s dark unruly hair, “Never again, Lena. I’ll take care of you. Khap vrreiahv.”

Always.

[fazedlight]

Leaning In

Everything felt strange.

It felt strange to see sunlight again. To walk into her apartment. To hug Alex again, hug Lena, hug the rest of the superfriends. To hear cars roll by and planes overhead and people everywhere. 

Compared to the phantom zone, everything was strange.

Wires were crossed, Kara thought, looking over at Lena with an overwhelming sense of guilt at what she had almost done, days before. Lena sat quietly on Kara's couch with a glass of wine, eyeing Kara from across the coffee table where Brainy and Alex were finishing out their game of Monopoly.

It had only been four days since her return, and Alex hadn’t given her a moment of solitude, so overjoyed to finally have her sister back. And Kara was glad for the noise, for the life that was back in her life with all the superfriends, chatter and colors and hugs instead of the desolate wasteland of the phantom zone. 

But in that time, Kara and Lena hadn’t had a moment alone together, leaving a sinking pit in Kara’s stomach when she thought about when she’d next have a real conversation with the Luthor. Does she realize?, Kara thought, Does she know I almost tried to kiss her?

The phantom zone breaks people. It’s why Krypton used it as a prison, why it became such an effective deterrent. Her brain wasn’t normal when she returned. She normally knew better. Knew better than to try to kiss her best friend. But in her traumatized and mostly isolated state, Kara had briefly forgotten the sort of decorum required with normal living - that her months of wishing she were home in Lena’s arms didn’t mean that her daydreams had become real.

Brainy finally won the game of Monopoly - proud that he had been able to knock Lena out of the game early, virtually guaranteeing his victory - and the superfriends finally began packing up to go home. Alex pulled Kara into a tight hug, planning on giving the kryptonian some space for the night, the first where Kara would sleep in her own bed instead of the Tower. “Coffee tomorrow morning?” Alex asked adamantly, Kara quickly agreeing.

One by one, the superfriends made their way out the door - until only Lena remained, still sitting on the couch, though she had set down the glass of wine. Kara turned awkwardly from her place by her kitchen island, watching the Luthor still watching her.

Slowly, Lena rose from her seat, making her way over to Kara. “Can we talk?” she asked.

Kara nodded, glancing nervously to the side. She knows. “I’m sorry,” Kara murmured. “When I came back, I- I wasn’t thinking.”

Lena’s brow furrowed in confusion. “You don’t need to be sorry, Kara.”

Kara tilted her head back up at Lena. “Are we- are we talking about the same thing?”

“Aren’t we?” Lena said quietly.

Kara swallowed. Just lay the cards on the table, she thought to herself. “I’m talking about - I tried to kiss you. Before I remembered you wouldn’t want it. I mean, even if you did-” Kara cut herself off, glancing to the floor. Rao, I should’ve thought through this more instead of babbling…

But to her surprise, she heard Lena step towards her, until the brunette was close enough to clasp onto Kara’s hand. Kara glanced up again, taking in Lena’s demure expression. “Even if I did?” Lena asked.

Kara’s eyes flitted between Lena’s, noting how her heart was beating faster, how there was a light blush crossing her face. Oh, Kara thought, feeling a small burn on her own cheeks as she realized what was happening. “Even if you did,” Kara said shyly, “I wouldn’t want our first kiss to be in front of everyone else.”

Lena smiled softly, giving Kara’s hand a gentle squeeze. “We’re alone now,” she said. 

Kara smiled back. “We are,” she said warmly, pausing for one more moment to take in Lena’s face. Lena tilted her head, and Kara leaned towards her.

And this time, she didn’t stop.

[suzukiblu]

🦋

For this emoji response, you get a "the one where Clark is trans and Kon is not" excerpt. TW for unintentional misgendering of a "closeted" character.

“Supergirl!” she shouts across the room, and the name fucking stabs through her throat. Kara stops, looking towards her reflexively as the red in her eyes blinks out. 

“Superboy! Where have you been?!” she demands furiously, dropping the clone/experiment/someone to the floor. Kon doesn’t flinch when she hears their head hit the concrete. 

It isn’t any harder than not flinching at hearing “Superboy” was. 

“We need to go,” she blurts, because if the guards she ditched catch up or more clones get sent in or–they just need to go, before somebody gets hurt. 

Before she has to look Match in the eye again right now. 

“I’m trying, but I was looking for you!” Kara snaps, and Kon doesn’t yell at her for being the one who left her behind to begin with when Kara knows she’s faster than her, better than her, stronger and smarter and more capable all around and Kara’s the one with super-hearing and X-ray vision so why is it on Kon to find her?! Why is she the one who–

Why is Match a boy, and she’s not? If–if either of them should’ve been a girl, it should’ve been– 

Match could just be a girl, if he was one. 

Kon can’t.