#it makes me happy finding like minded people

[traveler-at-heart]

Hot and Cold

Summary: Natasha's playing with fire when a new resident joins the Compound.

A/N: Queen of Angst @esposadejoyhuerta asked for the fluffiest, sweetest, tooth rotting story ever and I was happy to deliver, even after they changed their request to inclue jealousy BECAUSE no one can stop me. Love ya, baby!

Another day, another mission. Since last week’s mess, it seems like Fury’s been finding ways to torture the team.

Yes, at the end they were able to retrieve the drive with the data of over twenty enhanced individuals. But so did HYDRA. And now the Avengers are on a race against time to locate them before the Russians do.

Natasha walks to Fury’s office, not excited at the prospect of risking her life to recruit people who didn’t really want to be found.

“Yes?” she says as soon as Fury turns around. He hands over a very heavy binder. “Is this their criminal record?”

Great, a weirdo with a troubled past. Natasha might not make it out alive.

“No, that’s their academic stuff. She’s a scientist. Crazy smart” Fury explains. “Have you heard of Bio-Thermokinesis?”

“No, not really”

“The ability to manipulate the body temperature of oneself and/or others” he recites, having learned the concept just now.

“That doesn’t sound so bad” Natasha says, closing the folder. It’s certainly better than the last few people she had to chase down.

“Yeah, until she induces a heat stroke or hypothermia” Fury scoffs. “We’ve been failing at recruiting these people. It would be nice to have a win. Plus, she could work in the lab with Banner and Stark”

“I don’t think Nerd Club is worth one’s freedom” Natasha mutters, skimming through the file.

“Well, either way, this mission doesn’t requires strenght. It requires charm. You up for it or should I send Hill?”

As Natasha gets to the picture of the target, she looks up.

“I’ll handle it”

—

As usual, you’re carrying more than you can possibly handle. Books, your laptop, a sandwich from the cafeteria, and correspondence from the main office.

By the time you manage to open the door to your office, half of the things in your arms are dangerously close to scattering across the hardwood floor.

“Oh, shit” you mutter when your keys drop.

“Need a hand?” a voice says and you jump back, the rest of your stuff flying across the room. 

“Uh… can I help you?” you say, because the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen is perched up on your desk, legs crossed and a playful smirk across her striking features.

“Are you Doctor Y/L/N?”

“Yes. How did you…? I’m pretty sure the door was locked” 

Is she a thief? You have absolutely nothing of value, at least not for a conventional burglar. You run every possibility in your mind and then you land on your second least favorite one.

Natasha notices the room getting warmer, probably because of how flustered you got. The file seems accurate regarding your power.

“AC broke down?” she asks innocently, undoing the top button of her shirt.

“Uh… I… I’ll open the window” you say, pushing it and leaning against the window pain. You consider jumping down to escape, but it’s a considerable height. You take a breath, deciding to face the matter head on. “So, which agency sent you?”

“Ever heard of S.H.I.E.L.D.?”

“Yes, that was my first guess” you admit with a sad smile. “What can I do for you, Agent…?”

“Call me Natasha” she says, hopping off the desk. “I’m afraid I am the bearer of bad news… and a generous offer”

“Mmm” you nod, fixing your glasses. 

“A tactical team was sent to stop the purchase of confidential information for 30 enhanced individuals. We were able to obtain it… and so did HYDRA”

“Listen” you raise your hand, taking off your glasses and pinching the bridge of your nose. “I get it. HYDRA and S.H.I.E.L.D. know about me. The thing is, my power isn’t something you can leverage in a fight. I doubt they’ll be very interested in me”

“I think you’re wrong. And it’s not just your ability. Your expertise in science and your genetic makeup can be used to experiment”

“So, is that what S.H.I.E.L.D. wants to do with me?” you sigh, looking out the window. You’re enjoying the view, vaguely aware that life as you know it is over.

“We want to offer you shelter at the Avengers Compound. 24 hour security, top facilities and technology. You can continue your research” Natasha says, trying to make it sound like a great deal.

It brings her back to that time Fury told her it was either work for the US government or end up in the Raft.

Your offer is slightly better, but a golden prison is still a prison.

“Are there any questions I can answer before you make a decision?” she offers with a kinder tone.

“Yeah. Do I even have a choice?”

—

Academic life is all you’ve ever known. Grants were the perfect way to do your research without having to look for a benefactor and expose yourself. You could learn things about your DNA, your abilities, while doing other stuff without anyone noticing.

Now, you wake up and there’s nothing that drives you. You live with people who have exceptional skills, physical prowess, and military training. Their world is avenging, your world is scientific papers and books.

Sure, their lab is nice, but most of the times you end up leaving early, completely unmotivated and feeling empty. 

Natasha watches from afar, and although this isn’t her doing, she feels responsible. She tries to include you in activities she understands, like training, but you’re very obviously not the athletic kind.

Banner is, as usual, isolating himself and Tony speaks nerd, but is barely around unless a mission requires his presence. 

It isn’t until one day that Peter shows up to the Compound that Natasha gets an idea.

“Hi, Miss Romanoff. Is Mister Stark around?” he asks in that shy tone he always uses when he’s around Natasha.

“Nope, not to my knowledge. Do you need anything?” 

“FRIDAY told me to meet him here. He must have forgotten. I guess I better get back to my Biochem project”

Wait a minute.

He’s a nerd.

“Stay” she says, looking him up and down. Peter reminds her of a puppy when he stops completely, as if he learned a new command. “Wait for Tony at the lab. I’ll try to find him”

“You’re sure? I’m not allowed inside by myself” he hesitates, following Natasha.

“Yeah, it’s fine” she types in the access code, and of course, there you are, spinning in your chair.

As soon as you hear the door opening, you stop your movements, almost falling off.

Natasha finds your blush adorable.

“Hey, Y/N. This is Peter. He’ll be around waiting for Tony”

“Oh, hey. Ok, I was just leaving. I’m kinda stuck either way”

“Ordinary Differential Equations?” Peter says as soon as he gets his eyes on your board.

“Yes. Very impressive” you nod. “This is focused on genetic network. I’m trying to determine inborn errors of metabolism”

“Oh, you know? There’s a brilliant Doctor who’s working on that, maybe her paper would be great for you. She’s Y/N Y/L/N”

“Yeah, that’s me” you say, tapping your chin and examining the board. “What is your ability? If you have any? Maybe I can use a different set of data”

“Yes! I would love to, what do you need from me?” Peter says, a little starstruck at finding out you’re one of the most prestigious researchers in the world. 

“For now, a blood sample” you wink at him, adjusting your glasses.

Natasha sits in the back of the lab as you and Peter work together, and you explain every concept to him. This is the first time since you arrived that you don’t look so miserable.

The Russian takes it as a small win when you join her in the common area for dinner.

--

Since Peter found out about your abilities and your permanent stay at the Compound, you’ve been advising him on his project and college applications. Which is a really nice distraction, but it also makes you miss your own college days.

So, even if you’re in a better mood, it’s still hard to socialize with the team.

One day, you enter the lab to find Rogers, Wilson and Barnes looking at a screen, while Natasha types.

“Whoever encrypted this is slightly smarter than me. Only slightly” 

They look away as you drag a chair to focus on your own stuff, a cup of coffee in your hand and a cookie in your mouth.

“Hi…” you wave at them, feeling intimidated as usual.

“Hey, weather girl” Sam winks at you. 

Natasha rolls her eyes and elbows him.

“Ignore him, Y/N”

You can tell she’s getting frustrated, so you inch closer, looking at the code over her shoulder. Placing your hand on her elbow, you silently ask for permission to take over.

The redhead eyes you curiously, but stops typing and moves the keyboard your way. It takes you twenty seconds to hack into the files.

“How…?”

“I used to hack into databases to make sure my name wasn’t on any watchlist” you explain casually. Natasha laughs at that. “Anyway, there you go”

“Thanks, Y/N. You’re my hero” Natasha says, smiling up at you. Her tone makes you blush and you nod, going back to your desk.

“Nice work. We could use your help if you’re free some other time” Steve says as they leave the lab.

“Of course, Capitan” 

—

An intruder changes your mind about training. The threat is handled swiftly and you don’t even have time to hide before F.R.I.D.A.Y. confirms the suspect has been taken into custody

But you don’t even know how to begin to defend yourself, so you come back to Natasha, asking if her offer still stands.

Needless to say, the spy is more than happy to train you. Not just because it means you’re comfortable asking for things, but because Natasha can teach you something that will help you protect yourself.

You start with two sessions per week, which later turns to four, until you’re comfortable with training almost daily.

The rest of the team joins from time to time, giving you advice and helping you when Natasha’s away on missions.

After a few weeks, Natasha notices how your resistance is better and you’re building some muscle.

Only as a professional observation. It’s not like she finds you attractive, with that nerdy charm and toned arms.

One day, as you’re leaving the gym, she checks her bag, cursing when she notices she forgot a change of clothes. 

“Wanna borrow one of my hoodies?” you offer, handing over your NYU sweatshirt.

“You sure?” Natasha hesitates.

“Yeah, I got tons of these. From all the places I’ve done work or research” 

“I’ll give it back” she promises, taking it.

That turns out to be a lie.

A few days later, when you’re folding your laundry, F.R.I.D.A.Y. requests that you join Tony and Banner in the lab. Leaving the basket in the living room, you think nothing of it, nor do you notice that a couple of your sweatshirts are gone.

It all comes to light a week later, when Natasha comes back from a grueling mission. The only thing that will make her feel better is staying in her room while wearing your UCLA hoodie.

She totally forgets about her attire when she answers the door.

“Huh, so that’s where it was” you tilt your head, smiling.

“I…”

“I’m watching a movie, care to join me? It’s one of your favorites” 

“Ok” she nods, surprised that you’re not mad about the stolen sweatshirt. 

Natasha enters your room, appreciating the combination of books, notes and the board with equations. After you apologize for the mess, you offer a place to sit in your bed.

“It looks good on you” you compliment the redhead. Natasha smiles, trying to be nonchalant about it.

“Thank you” 

It becomes a habit, to steal your hoodies.

“Objectively speaking, you don’t actually need them as you can regulate your temperature” Natasha comments one day, digging through your closet. To her shock, she finds a sweatshirt with a sorority logo on it.

“Not mine. A girl I hooked up with in college” you explain.

Natasha rolls her eyes, throwing the garment as far away as possible while pulling a face. You laugh at her reaction.

“Don’t be jealous, Natty. You’re my favorite” you promise, unaware of the effect your words had on her.

“And yet you never let me wear the Harvard one”

“That was my first” you shrug your shoulders.

“First college or first hook up?” Natasha taunts and you laugh.

“A nerd never kisses and tell. Actually, a nerd rarely kisses anyone to being with” you try to joke, pulling out the Harvard sweatshirt from your closet to put it on.

Natasha eyes it, and you catch her intentions a little too late. She inches forward and you stretch your arm back, trying to place the hoodie out of reach.

“Nu-uh” you shake your head, laughing as she keeps trying to steal it. “Natasha, there are like ten other hoodies you  could take!” 

“I want this one!” she insists, jumping. Her body crashes against yours, and you both stumble, falling in your bed. Limbs are tangled and her laugh tickles your ear as she struggles to lift herself up. After a moment, Natasha smiles, looking at your lips. “Gotcha”

You don’t even know what to say, her intense stare making you feel warm -both literally and figuratively - and your heart beats faster when it seems like she’ll lean forward and kiss you.

“Agent Romanoff, there’s an urgent call for you” FRIDAY interrupts the moment. 

Natasha sighs, standing up and looking at you. 

“Catch you later?”

“Yeah” you nod, trying to hide your disappointment.

—

Natasha was gone for a week, and returned with a very bad injury. You heard the news as Steve and Tony were arguing in the kitchen, blaming each other as usual.

“Where…? Is she ok…?” you try to interrupt them, but they’re in the middle of a screaming match.

“Come with me” Maria says, taking you to a whole different wing of the Compound. Since you’ve never been on missions, you didn’t know about the Medbay.

Natasha’s lying in a hospital bed, asleep.

“She’s ok. A guy threw a knife at her, but it was only a superficial stab wound. Doctor said she’ll be discharged tomorrow” Maria eases your nerves. 

Of course, for her it’s easy to say it’s no big deal. Agents are shot, blown up, killed in the field. A little scratch is nothing, especially for Natasha. But you take a deep breath, leaving the Medbay in a rush.

As you lock yourself in the Avenger’s Lab, you make F.R.I.D.A.Y. a simple request.

“Show me the mission’s footage”

—

Natasha’s had worst, truly. But still, her head is throbbing when she wakes up. The doctor discharges her with the instruction to rest for a week. No training either.

The Russian notices a bag with clothes on the chair next to her bed. She finds your Harvard sweatshirt, which puts a tiny smile on her face.

You are nowhere to be found in the Compound when she returns, so she goes to her room to take another nap, the painkillers making her sleepy.

By the time Natasha wakes up to get something to eat, F.R.I.D.A.Y. requests her presence in the lab.

“What is it?” she says, surprised to find you working on a tablet. It looks like you haven’t slept in the last 24 hours, five or six cups of coffee around the various tables in the lab.

“I created a new technology for your suit” you jump right to it. “It has motion sensors that are triggered by incoming threats. That way, if someone tries to sneak up on you, you can either get an alert or program a defense mechanism that can be shot from any part of the suit” 

Natasha takes the tablet, running the simulation. She’s impressed with the level of detail you’ve placed on this and on such short time. She’s about to thank you, but you’re already asleep in the couch of the lab, clearly exhausted from all the work you’ve done.

The sight of your sleeping form makes Natasha’s heart flutter.

—

Movie night is the one tradition you’ve always been on board with. Coincidentally, it’s Natasha’s least favorite. Depending on her mood, she’ll join everyone on the living room, or talk you into watching something else in your room or hers.

Tonight, she stops by once the movie has already started. As usual, you’re on the couch in the far back of the room, your glasses reflecting the screen as you eat some popcorn.

“Hey” Natasha leans over the back of the couch and whispers against your ear, making you jump. Your eyes follow her as she jumps over to plop down next to you.

“You’re not supposed to be doing that with a hole on your side, Natasha” you reprimand. 

“It’s fine” she lies, grabbing some popcorn.

As the movie keeps going, the woman inches closer to you. At first you think she’s settling in her seat, but then her hand spreads on the back of the couch, dangerously close to your neck.

It’s fine. You can handle it.

Nope, you absolutely can’t. Not when you feel Natasha’s nimble fingers playing with the hairs on the back of your neck, her digits alternating between caressing the skin and scratching your scalp.

“You’re hot” she whispers at some point and you turn to look at her, dazed.

“Huh?”

“You feel hot” she clarifies a second later, her eyes looking at your lips. “Is everything ok? Those powers of yours are acting up”

“I’m fine” you nod, looking back at the screen. Aware that you are in fact increasing the temperature in the room, you take a breath and close your eyes, before anyone else notices.

You’re almost back to normal when Natasha stretches and lies across your lap, her left hand squeezing your thigh as the other one begins to trace patterns in your skin.

All while she's wearing your Harvard sweatshirt.

Your only thought is to take it off, along with the rest of her clothes and kiss every inch of her body.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., is the thermostat broken…?” Tony finally snaps, annoyed at the sudden changes in temperature. “Never mind” 

Everyone follows his eyes as he looks to the back of the room, where Natasha is playing dumb while riling you up.

“Can you two find a room to turn into a sauna and spare the rest of us?” Tony says, which makes your eyes widen, and the room practically turns into a freezer. “Great, now we’re all turning into popsicles. Cap, you’re familiar with the feeling, right?”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Tony” Natasha finally stands up, showing you some mercy. “Come on, detka” 

“Uh, ok” you say, your voice barely a whisper as you allow the woman to drag you back to her room.

As soon as the door is shut, she pushes you against it.

“So, tell me” she says with a playful smile. “How hot do you think it will get here?”

You can only shake your head, speechless. Natasha smiles, kissing you softly. All thoughts leave your head, opening your mouth to give her access. You’ll do anything she asks, anything at all.

“I see” she smiles when the room gets hot. “Good thing we won’t have our clothes on” 

It’s the best sex of your life.

So much so, the fire alarm goes off in the entire Compound.

“Fucking worth it” you sigh as you’re both naked in bed, the water from the sprinklers evaporating from all the heat in the room.

[ssa-danhotchner]

Crawling back to you | Aaron Hotchner x reader

summary: Aaron Hotchner finds himself unable to stop thinking about the connection he let slip through his fingers.

cw: fem!reader, use of y/n, past situationship

wc: 934

note: this is my first time writing here please be kind, english isn't my first language

The clock ticked past midnight, and Aaron Hotchner sat alone in his dimly lit study, the amber glow of a desk lamp casting long shadows across the room. A half-empty glass of whiskey rested by his hand, untouched for the past fifteen minutes. His gaze wasn’t on the paperwork scattered in front of him, nor on the book he’d meant to start reading an hour ago. Instead, it was fixed on his phone, his thumb hovering over a name that made his chest tighten.

[Y/N]

It had been years since he’d spoken to you. Not since you left the BAU. Not since he made the call to end whatever it was that had been building between you two—before it became something neither of you could control.

It had been years, but Aaron could still recall the way your laughter echoed in the bullpen during quiet moments between cases. The sound had been a rare gift in his otherwise chaotic world. You brought a lightness he didn’t know he needed—a reprieve from the endless weight of profiling killers and navigating his fractured personal life.

He thought of the nights you stayed late, pouring over case files with him in companionable silence. You didn’t ask questions about why he couldn’t leave, didn’t push when he kept his walls up, but your presence had a way of eroding his defenses. You didn’t demand anything from him, and that was the problem. You deserved someone who could give you everything, and Aaron knew he was not that man.

Still, there were moments when his resolve faltered. The way your hand brushed his when you handed him a file. The soft, concerned look in your eyes after a particularly grueling case. The lingering touch of your fingers on his shoulder as you said goodnight. He told himself it didn’t mean anything, but he knew better.

Aaron swallowed hard and leaned back in his chair, exhaling a shaky breath. The memory of your last conversation played in his mind like a song on repeat, the words still as sharp as they were the day they were spoken.

You stood in his office, arms crossed tightly over your chest, the tension between you palpable. The door was closed, the blinds drawn, but it felt like the whole world could see the cracks forming between you.

“You’re really doing this?” Your voice was quiet, but the hurt beneath it cut through Aaron like a knife. “You’re going to pretend like we don’t mean anything?”

“It’s not that simple,” Aaron replied, his tone measured, but the tremor in his voice betrayed him.

“It is that simple,” you snapped. “You either want this—want me—or you don’t. But don’t stand there and tell me it’s for my own good, like I can’t decide that for myself.”

He looked away, his jaw tightening as he fought to keep his emotions in check. “I’m doing this because I care about you,” he said finally. “Because I can’t give you what you need. I can’t be what you need.”

You stared at him, your eyes shining with unshed tears. “You don’t get to decide that for me, Aaron. You don’t get to push me away and call it love.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “But this—us—it’s a distraction. And distractions get people killed.”

The words hung in the air like a death knell. You took a step back, shaking your head as if trying to make sense of what he’d just said. “You’re scared,” you said, your voice trembling. “You’re scared to feel something real because it might actually make you happy. And God forbid you let yourself have that.”

Aaron didn’t reply. He couldn’t. He stood there, watching as you turned and walked out of his office, the sound of the door closing behind you echoing in his ears.

Aaron glanced at the phone again, your name glowing on the screen like a challenge. Are you awake? The words he’d sent seemed too small for everything he felt, but they were all he could manage. He hated how easily he could picture your face—your tired but curious smile, the tilt of your head when you thought he was being ridiculous. Would you even want to see him? Or had he burned that bridge too thoroughly?

The truth was, Aaron wasn’t sure what he wanted. Did he want closure? Forgiveness? Or something more dangerous—something he wasn’t sure he deserved?

Aaron hit send before he could stop himself. The phone felt heavy in his hand as he set it down, the seconds ticking by agonizingly slow. He told himself not to expect a reply—it was late, after all—but when his phone buzzed a moment later, his breath caught.

I wasn’t. I am now.

He stared at the words, a thousand emotions flooding through him at once. Relief. Nervousness. A flicker of hope. His fingers hovered over the keyboard, unsure of how to follow up, but he forced himself to type the truth.

I’ve been thinking about you.

The reply came quickly.

Funny. I’ve been trying not to think about you.

Aaron winced, though he supposed he deserved that. Still, you hadn’t ended the conversation, and that was something.

Would you meet me? he typed. I know it’s late, but I need to see you.

There was a longer pause this time, and Aaron held his breath, waiting for your answer. Finally, his phone buzzed again.

Same café as always?

Aaron grabbed his coat before he could think better of it.

The only thing he knew is that this time he wouldn't let you go.

[jestericulating]

i feel like its my curse to fall in love with side characters but i feel like we dont appreciate mithara’s brilliance enough

like ur gonna look me in my eyes and tell me u willingly miss out on an incredibly written character just bc she doesn’t have as much content and you gotta murk a few twerps to get her. knock her out like the rest of us

like she’s such a fascinating woman. for someone so vindictive and evil she’s so willing to be immediately vulnerable with you and voice her concerns just because you decided to save her and she recognises that most people in their right mind would leave her for dead but You Don’t and she literally doesn’t waste a second expressing her gratitude. who else willingly does that without me having to wrench it out of them huh

and i think it’s so fascinating because she’s literally a commander And Also a noble and yet you can ask her about anything to do with home and her life before and she’ll tell you it all so willingly just because you asked. she doesn’t hide anything from you; everything is out in the open and straightforward from the get go. she’s a no nonsense woman and i deeply respect that

it could also just be a me thing but there’s something i really appreciate about her not really having any specifically romantic greetings. she’s stalwart and alert and ready to run into battle for you until you ask her for a kiss and then her voice softens and she’s sweet and teasing you and it just feels So Much More Natural you know?? i find some of the other romances dialogue to be a little too mushy or on the nose for my liking so minthara is hard Not to romance every time. even on a redemption durge run she doesn’t chastise or get upset with you for not taking the netherbrain for yourselves Even Though it was what she had been dying to do since she joined your party. she doesn’t even really need your apology, she’s just happy to be by your side more than anything and i think thats what makes her so Ride or Die because all that matters to her is you!!!! even at the reunion party that she says she doesn’t particularly care to be at (i dont believe her for a second i KNOW she likes some of the companions deep down) she hangs around and waits just so that you can hang out with your friends because she wants you to be happy. she is a very ambitious and selfish woman and yet as soon as you get with her she pushes all of her selfishness aside Just to account for you. if you dont wanna do it then it won’t happen. end of story. she’s not gonna force you even if it’s literally all that she wants. yeah the compromise is that instead of doing the Massively Evil Thing you just do a Smaller Evil Thing but i dont ever play characters that Aren’t in some way morally dubious so whatever

i fear there is no one so fiercely loyal and supportive of any decision you make than minthara and i’ll die on that hill

[starredblood]

NOWHERE GIRL

PART TWO

kang sae-byeok x fem!reader

synopsis: time is ticking but sae-byeok seems to grow more irritated by your existence meanwhile you come face to face with the secret you’ve been holding onto.

wc. 1.9k

warnings: hints of homophobia | authors note: thanks for the love on part one! enjoy part two and let me know if you want to be added onto my taglist.

(nowhere girl masterlist)

You decided to get ready early in the morning to stay in your school campus for the entire day just to avoid staying at Ji-yeong and Sae-byeok’s apartment. Your new plan was just to stay here to sleep so wouldn’t bother them as much. Especially, Sae-byeok.

Because there was only so much you could pack in your duffle bag, you only brought your laptop, portfolio tote and your small portable supply container.

Before you head out, you go on your phone to find your new route to school for the week. And because you were concentrating, you failed to hear someone come out their room and walk towards you.

“Hey.” Sae-byeok hisses.

You shot your head up wondering why she’s up so early. Sae-byeok must also start her days early seeing as she has on her utility jacket, a pair of baggy jeans, and her unruly hair was more styled. The apartment was dimly lit so you can’t make out her expression, but you can only assume she isn’t happy about something you did.

“Why did you give Cheol your crayons?”

You blink. “You mean oil pastels?”

“Yes.” she grimaces. “I don’t know you so I don’t want you to be giving him things. Especially not without my permission.”

“They’re my old sets so I thought it would be better to give it to him than to throw them away.”

“We don’t need your charity case. Don’t give him any more of your shit.”

A frown starts to form on your lips. It’s bad enough you can’t go home anymore, now you have to deal with this.

You can feel your blood begin to boil watching Sae-byeok head to the front door, so you follow her out.

“They’re just oil pastels I don’t see why this has to be such a big deal?” you say to her, your voice louder now that you’re out of the apartment. Sae-byeok isn’t moved by your words. “Your brother looked so happy when I told him he could keep them—I wasn’t planning on giving him anything more.”

The morning breeze hits your red cheeks, cooling them. You following her like a baby duckling was not how you wanted to start your morning when you had a long day ahead.

Once you’re both out on the streets, Sae-byeok stops walking and spins around to face you. She took one step closer and you take a step back.

“Good.” Sae-byeok says.

“Good?”

Sae-byeok doesn’t like naive people. She doesn’t know you but from what she could guess: you’re just a spoiled daughter who threw a tantrum and ran away to prove a point. Once it all blows over, you have a support system to bounce back on. You can go back to focusing solely on your studies and later make a name for yourself—everything she can’t do no matter how many hours in the days she works or how many people she pickpockets.

“Yes. Good.” she repeats mockingly. “I don’t want him to get too attached to you being here—he’s a sensitive kid. So, just keep to yourself and focus on how you’re going to find a new place to stay in less than a week. Got it?”

You didn’t think the words of someone you met three days ago would affect you so much. But here you are, frozen in place, ashamed of yourself. However, in the back of your mind, you couldn’t help but think about the shift in accents when she spoke.

⊹ ✿・・───・・✦・・───・・✿

You were the first person in the art studio—about an hour or so early. With all your deadlines quickly approaching you saw the silver lining in arriving to your university early because you can catch up with all your work. Right now you were working on an art piece due next week, not realizing that class was soon starting and your friends began arriving.

“Hey.” one of them greets you.

You look down from your piece and smile at Yoon. She was the first person you contacted when you got kicked out of your parent’s house, you lived in her dormitory for only a week before you got caught. Although you wouldn’t consider Yoon a close friend seeing as she has a huge friend group, she was a reliant one.

“How are you, um, holding up?” she asks quietly to not catch the attention of the other students who began arriving.

“Not bad. I’m staying at an old school friends apartment for the time being.” you tell her, wiping your hands with a moist cloth.

Yoon nods looking at the ground in contemplation. “How long?”

“A week—well technically until Friday so five days.”

Something about her behavior seems off to you. Usually, she is pretty chipper ready to talk someone’s ears off. But today she is quieter, talking in less verbiage. Yoon shoots a glance around the classroom, surveying the vicinity to make sure no one is watching.

“There were rumors flying around about the real reason you ran away.”

You snort and fall back down on your seat to meet her at eye level. “Rumors? Aren’t we too old to be starting rumors?”

Yoon frowns and scoots a little back. “You know what it is…right?”

You stare at the floor, expressionless.

“They aren’t true, right?” Yoon asks cautiously. You threw her a look and the girl’s lips part to gasp or say something—you aren’t sure but it wasn’t a good reaction. Your heart rate begins to increase as you turn to face your canvas.

It’s all over now, you think. If Yoon has figured it out so will the rest of your peers and your social life is beyond the grave now.

Not even a minute later, Yoon stands up and sits on the other side of the room when she saw her friends enter. You start to become paranoid, wondering if she’ll immediately begin to gossip.

Throughout the duration of class you couldn’t help but get lost in your thoughts. The anticipation of everyone finding out about you was swallowing you whole. You are starting to wish that time moves slower so you wouldn’t have to leave class.

It didn’t help that Yoon and her friends kept stealing looks at your direction. You tried to avoid making eye contact but you would find that hard to do.

Rubbing the sweat from your palms, you pick up your brush and use this rush of panic as a way to speed up the process of your art work.

“Don’t forget about the deadline coming up!” your professor says five octaves higher while the class starts packing their things. “The students with the top three highest grades will get their work displayed at Hangaram Art Museum for the entirety of the summer!”

Your professors words were in the back of your mind as you frantically tried to pack your things to avoid Yoon and her group. It wasn’t until you heard a ‘Psst’ coming behind you that you snap out of your trance.

“Hey,” whispers a peer of yours. You never spoken to him, but the toothy inviting grin he is sending you is enough for you to know that he isn’t harmful. “I just wanted to tell you not to let those girls get into your head. I know how you feel—if you know what I mean.”

You send him a quizzical look. “Thanks?” So, they did gossip and everyone in this class knows. You might just throw up.

“Just keep your chin up and don’t let them see you in a moment of weakness and you’ll be alright.” he sends you a thumbs up as he walks away. You force a smile that goes away in a blink of an eye and sink into your seat.

What have you done? Why did you trust Yoon so much? You feel like such an idiot.

⊹ ✿・・───・・✦・・───・・✿

It was almost nearing midnight, Ji-yeong and Sae-byeok were in the living room. After a long day of working, Sae-byeok was trying to rest before doing it all over again tomorrow by watching mindless television until her roommate disrupts her to start pacing back and forth in front of her. Sae-byeok knew what she was getting worked up about. Ji-yeong clearly began to notice your lack of presence today.

“Where could she be this late? I’m sure libraries are closed by now…” she trails off, rubbing her chin in deep thought.

Sae-byeok’s mind goes back to earlier this morning. Your brief exchanges could’ve caused her to avoid coming to the apartment but your duffle bag is still here. You’d have to come back eventually.

“Sae-byeok, what did you do?”

Sae-byeok’s eyebrows knit in confusion. “Me?”

“I saw that look you just did. You look guilty. What did you do?”

“Nothing.” she responds coolly.

Ji-yeong purposely blocks the television screen and crosses her arms. “I’m not moving until you tell me the truth.”

“I don’t remember it was early in the morning.”

“Is it because she gave Cheol her crayons?”

Sae-byeok narrows her eyes. “How did you—?”

“He wouldn’t stop talking to me about it when I picked him up from school.” Ji-yeong rolls her eyes. “So, it is because of that? You got mad at her because of crayons, Sae-byeok, really?”

“It’s not just about the crayons.” she snips, sitting up straight from the couch. “Do you even know her personally? When was the last time you two actually talked before this?”

Ji-yeong doesn’t say anything.

“Thought so.” she scoffs. “I don’t trust her. Especially since you don’t want to tell me why she ran away in the first place.”

Ji-yeong purses her lips to digest her words. She shuffles to let Sae-byeok watch television again and sank next to her in the couch.

“I think she’s nice.” she grumbles like a child. Sae-byeok sends her a glare.

“You think, you don’t know.”

Ji-yeong shrugs. “I have no reason to think she’s a bad person.”

“People can change overnight. I’ve seen it happen and I’ve seen the consequences of being too trusting.”

Ji-yeon goes silent again. “No. This is something different—“

“Well, if you can just tell me why she’s even here in the first place then maybe I—“

“I can’t.”

“Then I don’t see the point in discussing this.” Sae-byeok sighs. She gets up from the comfort of the couch and stretches before grabbing her coat by the front door.

“Where are you going?” Ji-yeong frowns.

“To clear my head. I won’t be long.”

Ji-yeong doesn’t push any further, knowing this is something Sae-byeok occasionally does when her thoughts start to become too much. Maybe Ji-yeong went a little too far trying to defend your character because Sae-byeok rarely ever backs down from an argument so she really tested her limits.

Of course with Sae-byeok’s luck, she stumbles upon you sitting on the staircase, doodling something on your sketchbook underneath the fluorescent lights of the building.

Sae-byeok stares at your back trying to figure out if she should sneak back inside or talk to you. Maybe this is her chance to figure out what you’re really up to and prove Ji-yeong wrong.

“Why aren’t you inside?” she asks you after hesitating. You don’t response, you just throw her a glance before going back to drawing. Sae-byeok feels like this is some sort of payback for earlier.

Sae-byeok thought she was good at reading people’s body language and automatically pinpoint who they are and what their intentions are. It was something she had to learn to do in order to survive. But you are becoming an outlier.

“Ji-yeong is worried.”

“Well, just tell her I’m here.” you speak up. “I’ll be inside later. I just want to stop by a convenience store to get something to eat.”

“We have food inside.”

You turn to make eye contact with her again. For a brief moment, no words were spoken even as tension was rising.

“You got mad at me over oil pastels. Why would I go around touching your food?” you ask softly.

And for the first time, Sae-byeok is taken aback by you. There is another evanescent period of silence.

“Fine.” she says and starts walking down the staircase and further away from the building only to turn around to call out your name. You poke your head out from your sketchbook, raising an eyebrow at her. “Are you coming or what?”

You survey her figure blankly. With every interaction you have with Sae-byeok, she just keeps confusing you further. It feels like you are playing mental game of chess with her and you aren’t sure how to feel about that. You’re already overwhelmed with what happened today at school, you shouldn’t add someone like Sae-byeok to the mix.

Sae-byeok dug her hands deep inside the pockets of her jacket and taps her foot on the pavement, waiting for you impatiently. You sigh in defeat and close your sketchbook.

Just five more days and this’ll all just be a blurry memory, you think to yourself.

🏷️: @monroesturnns

[jadeshifting]

— THINGS I’M LOOKING FORWARD TO. ( IN MY WALKING DEAD DR, a VERY condensed list )

　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　 　　 　　　　

ib @ dreamyshifts, and also that anon who asked me to post about my twd dr more (i have stuff lined up just for you mwah)

⋆˙⟡ every building and tall structure and house is suddenly abandoned and begging to be explored. the creepy depths of creaking boards and overgrown vines reclaiming the windows and the very foundations. personally, it never stops being fun for me to explore all these brand-new-old places

⋆˙⟡ the braided hair, being a little covered in dirt, lucky to have even a touch of chapstick. it’s hot and exhilarating to find little ways to hold onto femininity and self-identity in a filthy world

⋆˙⟡ nature, without anyone to damage it. the light pollution is long gone, you can see every single star twinkling above your head at night. the trees are unfettered, twisting branches are easy to climb. the fields of grass and weeds and wildflowers are completely unchecked—beautiful

⋆˙⟡ gratitude in the small things. after the world ends, every last sunset, bubbling stream, and bird chirping and whistling overhead is like liquid gold. it opens your eyes—realizing that you took every last thing for granted when society was still standing, but not anymore! now it’s laughable how little it takes to make me gleefully happy

⋆˙⟡ forced minimalism. sure, everybody only has maybe one backpack of belongings because they have to, but still. i’m happy to be freed of countless material possessions, to be mindful of the things i choose to hold onto ( a gun, a pack of cherry tic-tacs. it’s all the same )

⋆˙⟡ the kinds of hopes and dreams we discuss around a campfire. passing around a jar of some disgusting redneck alcohol and humming about ideas of farms, of growing gardens and starting the closest thing to a family. it fuels people in a way that didn’t happen before

[red-takami]

Hello red I hope you are doing good! I wanted to ask about your Navariah dr.

Whats it like there?? Can you tell us story-times or anything of the sort? It sounds magical and I would like to know more :)

-🪆

Sorry this took me so long to answer, it's been a weird couple of days. Anyway! I also got this question here 👇🏽 I'll be answering both.

What is it like in Navariah?

In Navariah, the continent is one absolute humongous landmass and is the only one on the planet. There are islands all around the borders and coastlines, some even sort of far from the landmass that belong to Navariah.

In Navariah, there are different breeds of humankind. Lizardis, Deer folk, Eleven's and a race that had gone extinct - the coal.

In Navariah, schooling and education is free. There you're allowed to use your Magic (Soul) for whatever you desire, and can turn that into anything. The place is so large that the difference in geography depends on where exactly you are in Navariah, you can experience, learn, and work with different things.

In Navariah, I am one of the two military commanders/generals, I work under the royals. There are 26 military squads that work in specific areas to keep Navariah running as smoothly as possible.

In Navariah, there are things that I couldn't have ever dreamt about before shifting there. The way Magic, Culture, and the history of Navariah is embedded into everything you'll ever encounter there is unlike anything I've seen. It grew on me of course, hence why I stayed for so long LMAO.

How has being in a different reality other than my Cr for so long, changed me?

Over the years I spent in Navariah, I went to school. I graduated. I gained knowledge of stuff that is taboo here. I fought. I met people. I experienced life in a completely different light than ever before. The literal chemistry of my brain, has changed due to my time spent in Navariah.

See it this way, imagine you spend your entire life in one country with specific things that were practically drilled into your mind since birth. You understand life on earth, in that country surrounded by that land and it's people/culture from a first person view, you know nothing else as personally as you know your home. Then, all of the sudden you make the split decision to drop everything. I mean everything, and leave to another country across the world where things are like white to black in comparison to your old home. You're forced to learn the basics of that land, you're forced to start from scratch as everyone else did there. You grow over time, you begin to understand and SEE things differently than you did before - you gain a specific perspective. That, is exactly what happened when I shifted to Navariah. It was bound to happen you guys, almost a whole decade? Of course I'd be different than before I shifted.

I find myself genuinely thinking about Navariah every single day since I shifted back. It's in everything I do, as if I had just gotten back from that (at first) foreign country and had HELLUVA time and still remember everything like it was a suupperrr long but very enjoyable and productive vacation.

Thank you all for reading this yap. Happy Shifting!

[unhingedpolycule]

Haiii ! Love what you do and had two questions :

Do you think any of them would cry at the others burial (if they even want that ? Cremation ?)

And do you think one of them would wear glasses once they age a bit more ?

Thank you 🩵

Haiiiii! First of all, thank you for your ask! It made me think and it was a really cool concept to work with! You can find the (long) answer under the cut!

If the body is recovered from the warzone where they died, they would have a small service I think. Not because the other would particularly want or need it, but because the team would more or less insist and it is simply the social convention. It doesn’t really bother them either. That being said… they would not cry. Nikto would probably get pretty gruff, outwardly pretending that their relationship was not as deep as it actually was, so he isn’t too sad. Mostly because people keep giving him condolences. He does not like it, handling Sebastian‘s death is hard enough on its own. Krueger would just get… like very silent in my mind. Not directly pretending that it doesn’t bother him, but he would let his mask slip a bit. Instead of being detached on purpose, he just sits and reminiscence about Nikto and what he is missing right now. His voice, having someone to concentrate on and to care for as to make his life less eventless. He was Nikto’s caretaker and partner for years and he was used to being joint at the hip, always having an interesting and stimulating person around.

Both feel the urge to be alone. Krueger would go missing soon after, probably searching out Blaustein without telling him what is going on. Of course, Blaustein understands that something bad must have happened and he is smart enough to count two and two together. Krueger would find a new PMC, maybe he would even stay with Coalition (Blaustein’s faction) for a bit. But he is a wanderer at heart, so it wouldnt last longer than a year. Nikto was the only thing tying him to a specific faction, so he starts moving again, with regular visits to Hans though. As for Nikto… he would be pursued by Nikodim, who thinks that he is helping. Their relationship might very well break under that pressure, leaving Nikto much worse off, just because his stability and his support system is gone. He eventually rebuilds routine on his own, but before that, he would probably burn himself out in an attempt not to grief too much.

To make it short: Krueger would let himself feel what he feels, accepting it for what it is and seek the support that he might need. Nikto would very much do the opposite and repress in order to continue being functional, even if this ruins a lot of things for him. Both would be incredibly affected. I don’t know if they would actually cry. If they do, it comes over them in the middle of the night without any warning. They want to turn around to hug the other and they find themselves alone. For Krueger, it’s a few tears. Nikto is angry ugly crying, clutching the pillow and staring at noting.

Krueger keeps Nikto’s last pill bottle in his pack, using it for his own drugs. Nikto keeps Krueger’s net on his bedpost. Both store the other’s gear. Nikto in his room, Krueger with Blaustein, since Hans has a more steady lifestyle.

BUUUUUUUT since Krueger is an unkillable cockroach (derogatory) and Nikto is very capable and has a second pair of eyes attached to a man which would go to length to safe him… they are fine. Very fine. VERY FINE AND HAPPY. (I can’t do mcd unless it’s a “growing old” setting. I am weak.)

As for the glasses: very easy. Nikto is used to taking medication and having to subsidise for things his body is not able to do anymore (mostly because of his mental illness, but I also imagine him to have issues with mild erectile dysfunction/maintaining an erection if he is not actively having sex right in that moment.) so he would wear some cheap old man glasses. He has like three pairs, all various stages of scratched/disrepair.

Krueger on the other hand would not like it. At all. He has lived his life being able to do everything without aid, running into an active warzone without proper protection and coming out mostly unscathed. It would take some time until he could accept glasses properly. Not because of pride or of others seeing him like this, but because he has to admit that he is no longer fully “self-sufficient”. Especially because he has above average eyesight! Nikto would tease him a bit until he notices that Sebastian does not wear his glasses. They might have a gruff, short talk about it after Nikto sees Krueger holding his phone very far away from himself, squinting in annoyance while trying to read his messages. Krueger wears the damn thing after that. At home. Sometimes.

[lifenconcepts]

I absolutely agree with that and am SO happy to find someone similar to me!! I’ve never been one to hate on the shit another finds good but the popularised versions of identities being this half which is just sunshine and rainbows always feels a little unjustified for how much those same people which say ‘embrace the weird! Be yourself! Love others!!’ and say they support those which unapologetically go against what social norm has been formed, suddenly go from all kind to ‘yuck! How can you say that? That doesn’t seem right.. you’re not one of us!’ the very moment you mention you support real fur instead of faux, that hunting and genuinely mauling your food with your hands is okay, feel angry when another animal marks your home or vehicle, or any other variation of not being the ‘aesthetic therian’ others so believe is the ‘only’ way of being alterhuman.

The exact definition that’s been burned into our brains like a branding has gotten boring! There’s no right way to be yourself, because you’re the only one who knows what you actually look like! And no matter how much I see ‘alterhumanity is different for everyone’ I still tend to think that not all really get that into their brains. They take in the words but not the MEANING behind them. I want others to just blatantly face the facts that some find it nice, prefered in fact, to just want to be able to think and act like an animal. None of that explanation of why and how. (I love to find meaning behind everything but that’s simply because my soul craves knowledge) I too sometimes believe it to be great for the simplicity of a creature’s mind. You can enjoy harming another life without some twisted sense of pleasure (although that’s also fine. Huntings dogs were bred to hunt. Ofcourse they will be happy to hunt), to go where you walk simply because it’s what feels right (why must you understand the journey or destination in mind when birds migrate simply by how it feels and where is better? They don’t think ‘oh gee! It’s the 8th of September! I must get going to Portugal otherwise I may not survive the cold!’ Their minds subconsciously gather the temperature change and just vaguely understand they need to fucking go some place warm), and it feels irritating to fight for this in a community that claims to support and understand eachother alot- BUT ANIMALS DO NOT NEED TO EXPLAIN THEMSELVES! They don’t! They don’t decide to just casually start feeling some way and try change to be that, no! They feel a way, and so they are that. And that may change, it may be wrong, but who cares!? Emotion is emotion and sensation is sensation. Whatever feeling comes along then it’s that feeling which is invoked. This makes more sense with examples but I just had to get it off my chest.

You won’t find a flying squirrel explaining to another ‘look, I just don’t feel enough like a rodent enough because I’ve seen the air like the birds and bugs, perhaps I’m not made for this body because I love the air as must as the trees. Is it so wrong?’ No. It’s just living as it fucking needs to, eats shits walks and floats, and will die when it needs to. Our human minds allow for a lot more to do and various things to come of it, but they also are just so much of a plague of questions that assault simple activities. Ah- I could go on for hours, but everyone needs to know that an alterhuman will be alterhuman even if they don’t explain themselves. Maybe someone misunderstood themselves but to what extent does it even matter? Maybe it’s chosen maybe it’s involuntary but why are you policing another? Is life showing any sign of rules? Sure, patterns exist, and there may be exceptions for moral wrong doing, but in the end it’s always up to subjective perception to decide what is right for you. We already have human-made rules, it’s called the law. Don’t kill or abuse others, don’t steal and destroy another’s property, and the rest is up to your grubby little hands to decide (some laws are idiotic I will admit).  And I needed to get this out for a long time but damn it- ALLOW others to exist without a label! Allow yourself to go unlabelled! It’s a common practice but it’s not as neccesary! Do you know how much agony you’ll be spared if you stop going ‘well how much of a Therian am I? What counts as Otherkin? Have I experienced any symptoms of So-and-so in the past month?’ And rather spot what makes you feel better in your body, what brings happiness, and what you do often. The cause ain’t even all that neccesary to understand unless you want to. Just focus on what you feel like and what you want to see in yourself and then you can go all ‘let’s find a word for this’. Honestly. The English language has already so many words, and that’s not even taking into account those which grown lost with time. You really think newly-made terms don’t hold as much value? Or that a single word must explain your own mind and body? Your soul is boundless, but able to be gazed upon at times. So why limit yourself to fit into a new box just to claim you ‘escaped the system!!’ as you once more alter yourself and grow bound to mere words and a fear for others judging you.

Okay that’s a bit off topic now, thanks for the opportunity to ramble, but yeah. Let animals be animals. And animals don’t need to explain themselves, they can blatantly do whatever feels good or right at the moment without it having define their entire existence or life. Animals can be dirty, mean, confusing, nasty, dangerous, scary, but still have nice qualities. And even if not, it is not their fault.

Never ever mistake me. I am not just in favor of the uwu romantic version Being An Animal. It's not all moodboards and waxing poetic about tails/wings/etc and running in the forest wild and free. All of that stuff is GOOD and FINE and a nice outlet for all flavors of nonhumans, please do not stop engaging with that sort of thing. I'm talking about me also wanting to embrace the gross and so-called ugly and less fortunate aspects of animality. like when you're wrestling a large prey animals into submission so you can eat that day but it fuckin Gets You with a claw/antler/horn/hoof/beak/etc and suddenly you're hurt real bad. Lost an eye, a toe, half your tail. Got a permanent limp from being stomped so hard that will make hunting difficult so you may not live your full natural lifespan. dying of severe cold or heat and then your body decomposing slowly, being food for other things. scent marking with piss, shit, musk. being young and inexperienced so you go without food for days cuz you can't hunt for shit.

there is no part of animality that is something I don't desire. I want it all, because all of me is animal. does it suck to downgrade from human sized complex brain to smaller wolverine brain? No not really! I am not mourning the loss of things I never asked for in the first place. sure I could say that woo, less complex brain means less capacity for things to go wrong, but that is a very human lens to look through. does a wolverine know it's "lucky" that it cannot have certain human mental illnesses because its brain may not be that complex? no, and that's why I'm not worried. I could turn into one fully physically overnight and then die stupidly 2 years later and that would still be ideal. sure I also may romanticize some things in ways that are not really Natural for my species, like how I think places that feel like Home just seem so beautiful to me, but no damn animal is perfect. I am allowed a couple flaws. several, in fact, lmao.

I Crave It All

[kykyonthemoon]

7 Days the mini-series

About this series: ✈️

Day 05: Sunshower

I was used to just him and me, always together. However, as we grew older, our own worlds expanded, and more people came.

I didn't think about it until one day.

That day, I headed to Caleb's school after class. We went to school and returned home together day by day. There was going to be a volleyball tournament between high schools in the district, so he often had to stay after class to practice. I chose a good spot in the grandstand, and finding him among the players on the field was not a problem to me at all.

Whether it was studying or playing sports, I loved seeing him putting all his mind into it. Occasionally, he would glance towards the stands, then smile when he saw me there. When he scored, I wouldn’t hesitate to stand up and scream: “YAYYY!!! CALEB YOU'RE SO COOL!!!” And every time, his teammates would constantly make fun of him till his ears turned crimson.  While in the stands, the girls in the upper grades would glance and me and whispered:

“Who is that girl?”

“I don’t know. She must be crazy about Caleb…”

“Who wouldn’t like him? Caleb is so handsome, and kind!”

“OMG!!! He’s staring at us!!!”

A few seats ahead of me, the females began to conceal their faces and laugh among themselves. I had no idea why my stomach felt uneasy. I sat down and remained silent throughout the practice that day.

Of course, Caleb didn't understand what upset me so much. Even I could not know what it was. I was too young to start dating, yet old enough to acknowledge the most beautiful emotions of my youth were blossoming. Every afternoon, I waited for Caleb at the sports court before we came home together. And every afternoon, I caught him surrounded by so many other girls.

There was no doubt how popular he was at school. I should be happy for him, since he was everyone's favorite. Yet why could I not get rid of this uncomfortable feeling in my heart? Was it because I was used to being the only one by his side? Was it because I disliked the idea of sharing him with anyone else?

That day, after his practice, I saw Caleb talking to a classmate. She was proposing that they take a stroll home together, it seemed. My fists clenched, head bowed, I walked away. There was a tint of soreness on my nose.

After a while, I heard Caleb calling my name. My feet didn't stop, they wanted to go even faster. He caught up with me and took hold of my wrist.

"Pip-squeak? You didn't wait for me today?"

His naïve expression infuriated me even more. I pulled my hand away from him and replied:

"Go home with her."

Every step I made now vented the path that had done nothing wrong. Caleb casually strolled beside me and said:

"Who? Is there anyone else other than the two of us?"

He took notice of my silence, then pulled my hand to stop me. “Come on. Tell me, what have I done wrong?”

The radiant smile on his lips forced me into the situation where I failed to keep my poker face. I pouted and gave him an unkind cheek squeeze, saying:

“Stop smiling.”

“On't ou ike it en I ile?" (Don't you like it when I smile?)

Caleb said as I rubbed his cheeks to let out my sulking though he did not do anything wrong. That very moment, it began to rain, even though the golden sun was still shining brightly.

“Oh, a sunshower?…”

“This is also known as fox rain. Legend has it that when it’s both sunny and raining, it’s the time for the fox to welcome his bride. But our Gran said that this type of weather indicates a quarrel between the Sun God and the Rain God.” Caleb explained and turned to face me. “It seems that you are mad at me too, pip-squeak. I'm not sure what I did wrong, but... could you kindly forgive me??”

I didn’t answer right away, yet the smile on my lips gave him the answer. I held his hand in mine and we continued walking on the long path.

“Caleb… Will you… date someone else in the future?”

“Huh? Dating? Why are you curious about it?”

“Well… I was just thinking… When I grow up a little more and you’re not with anyone, I… I will be your date... Is that alright?”

Our hand squeezed, he grinned, as bright as the sun and the rainbow in the rain in front of our path home.

[ladypiscesmoon]

year ahead Armie Hammer (personal year card: The Hermit

Ask me anything that needs to be clarified)

What has Armie to release from 2024:

Bluebell fairy: (mistakes happen when you're not clear-minded. Forgive. Step forward in a lesson learned and know that you can achieve more wisdom as a result. Forgive yourself and move on with the lessons learned.) Doorway to fairyland (lift your spirits after you were held back in life. dream and view the world from a different perspective. That way you expand your mind and develop your imagination) Armie's is aware of the need to move on, but he cannot always see the way to go. It's time to release the past.

Overall 2025 (Feeling)

Camel (trust that you have the resources to get through the challenges before you) Sometimes it looks like the journey he's on is like crossing a desert with no end in sight. But he has to think about how far he's come already. He has to identify where he wants to go and proceed slowly but steadily, toward his goal. He's got to cast away his fears, doubts and hesitations. Ease his mind and heart. He will get through this, like he got through other challenges.

Walrus (remain vigilant about the current situation; pay attention to signs and omens and let them dictate your choices)

He's got to ask for specific signs to show him the way in life purpose, relationships and career, or even everyday concerns. He's got to allow his thoughts to flow (like meditation) and he'll pick up the signs and clues, maybe in lucid dreams. Trust these signs.

222 Alignment (how do you move forward toward your life's true calling? Do what makes you happy. Your enthusiasm is what's keep you going. Follow your interest if it's piqued by something. Following these routes will help you discover your life's purpose)

222 means good fortune in finances, relationships and career as well as a reminder to work towards your soul's purpose. For singles it's considered as a sign a true love is coming or that your soulmate is near

0606 Commitment (applying honesty and light daily is a fast track to creating a peaceful and meaningful life. It's how you find solutions and comfort. Release worries by speaking your truth and expressing emotions regularly. Open up for the best is yet to come)

The double zero's in 0606 emphasize a sense of commitment. For twin flames there's an underlying equilibrium and cosmic plan. The combination f the 0 and 6 suggests a focus on spiritual awakening and enlightenment. Twin flames encountering 0606 may interpret it as an invitation to delve deeper into their spiritual journey during the time of separation. Despite physical or/and emotional distance there's a stable equilibrium in the cosmic orchestration. The twin flames have to channel unconditional love. They have to express love that transcends physical boundaries understanding that their connection is timeless and eternal. With everything Armie has gone through in the last years, he's a lot further on his spiritual journey than his twin flame. The twin now has to catch up and they can reunite. I think Armie could be teaching his twin flame a lot.

Overall 2025 (Lenormand)

The heart( love, romance, infatuation, art, beauty, joy of life), the man(the significant card for a man, the partner for a woman), the coffin(death, endings, mourning, transformation, manipulation) The book(secrets, hidden knowledge, keeping a secret), the snake (lies, deceit, misguidance, illusions, chaos, temptation, seduction, cunning), the ring(relationship, marriage, cooperation, togetherness, cycles) The stork (change, movement, beginnings, flexibility, changeability, moving house), the whip (strife, fighting, argumenfsdebate, perseverance, competition, energy), the ship (travel, a journey, finances, navigation)

Combinations and thoughts: (they read like a sentence) -A loving man, a desirable man, a flirty man, transformation (new beginning) in a relationship -Backstabber is discovered (people not liking this relationship) -Secret commitments (trying to have a private relationship) -Hiding a ring (maybe having a symbol of this love, but hiding it) -Repeated change -Thinking about moving (could be overseas or out of country)

Overall 2025 (LOVE)

Abundance (keep a positive mindset, manifest exactly what you want, gratitude, bliss) The snake (competition, energy, clever, malicious, look over your shoulder, the other woman) Boat (receiving what you need, closure, progression, arriving, moving on from issues)

This seems to be a better year for Armie in love. Some people will not like him having found love though. But as long as he doesn't let him influence him, he will be fine. There's always someone jealous, or hateful or disappointed. As long as he's happy he should go after what he wants

Overall (CAREER/MONEY)

2 of swords (at a crossroad, avoiding the truth, tough choices) The star reversed (hopelessness, boredom, uninspired)

Career: stalemate, conflict at workplace, lack of motivation, pessimism about work Money: difficult or unpleasant decisions as well as an inability or refusal to face reality. Not quite what he hoped for his financial situation. Trying to save up money. He has fought a lot to get back a resemblance of his earlier career. He would very much like to provide for his children. Some of his thoughts are very traditional, but he should know that he's come a long way. Even if this year may have a bit more of a stagnation in his career, its doesn't mean it will always be like that. It may also be that he's feeling inspired in the roles he gets, or filming is not as satisfactory as it was for him. He might still think about another direction, or a combination of things. I still see him writing or producing

Overall( HEALTH)

8 of cups: (abandonment, walking away, disappointment) 4 of cups reversed (gratitude, focus, seeing opportunity) overload/excessment/obligation/overwhelm

Your environment and your way of thinking has negative effects on your health. Don't worry about things that are out of your hand. You will re-energize and upbeat in a healthy context if you go with the flow

Month for Month

January

The tower reversed (fear of change, avoiding the inevitable, liberation) Death reversed (resisting change, inevitable endings, stagnation) Citrine: abundance in creativity and healing as well. Armie has to let go of his fears. They bring him stagnation and delay in being truly happy.

February

Queen of coins (mature, successful, practical) 3 of wands reversed (returning home, holding on to the past, unhappy with choices) Snowflake obsidian: inspiration, ideas and talents In the last years Armie has kept hidden, nurturing and protecting his own creative ideas and projects. He feared change and was avoiding it. It stagnated his own process. He is going to change that. He already started it with his podcast, but we will see more examples of his brilliant mind (and he's funny too. Love that man)

March

4 of swords (mental overload, sanctuary, solitude) 10 of coins (inheritance, financial security, family) Calcite: more vitality and enthusiasm for life This month there will be an increase in finances, but also he will find someone to express more of his ideas and feelings. He will need a bit of solitude, to think some things over.

April

9 of swords (depression, intense anxiety, feeling hopeless) Strength (courage, overcoming, control) Kyanite: Pay attention to your intuition, rather ingenious idea will surface that will radically change your views on life, especially your career. Strangely enough it feels like Armie will be helping someone to make some decisions, especially on the subject of career. This will drastically change this persons life. So it doesn't have to do directly with Armie's career in this month, at least it feels like it to me.

May

The chariot reversed (lack of direction, aggression, powerlessness) Knight of cups (Chivalry, hopeless romantic, idealistic) Petrified wood: a magical transformation is about to occur through an unexpected turn of events. It's the result of the strength and commitment you have long shown to something. Many who have, until now either ridiculed or attempted to discredit you, will all of a sudden want to jump to your side. Long time there was stagnation and hopelessness in Armie's life, but the times are changing. Also, a very romantic month for him.

June

King of swords (intelligent, head over heart, logical) 3 of cups (Parties, indulgence, happiness) Rhodochrosite: We all have negative and positive aspects in our characters either currently or in the past. Taking the person he loves as they are, loving them with their vices and their virtues, seeing them for the human that they are. Forgiveness.

July

6 of cups reversed (growing up, childhood issues, letting go of the past) The devil (vices, temptation, manipulation) Molybdenite: There is nothing you have to fix or change in your life. Start to accept all of who you are. All is in perfect divine order. Accepting who he is, will all his vices and virtues. Letting go of the past.

August

9 of cups (dreams come true, satisfaction, abundance) The emperor (dependability, authority, structure) Gold with Quartz: a newfound sense of joy Feeling on top of the world, basically

September

4 of wands reversed (feeling unwelcome, family issues, animosity) 8 of sword reversed (self-acceptance, seeing Cleary, release) Pyrite: feeling emotionally imbalanced, because you have yourself allowed to believe another's critical judgements of you Feeling insecure, but someone having your back means you remind your strength. Let people judge, they will always do it, no matter what you do.

October

knight of wands (fearless, risk-taker, free spirit) 2 of cups (mutual respect, love, equality) Aquamarine: in this period greater empathy and insight is necessary. Someone loving him and having his back. It gives him strength and makes him feel free

November

Ace of coins (financial opportunity, prosperity, manifesting money) Page of coins (young but grounded, solid beginning, strong foundation) Amber: something that's causing friction and tension comes to a head I feel like there will be a financial setback or something, but the person in his life that loves him is helping him through it

December

2 of wands reversed (doubt, fearing the unknown, being restless) The high Priestess (sacred knowledge, divine feminine, unconscious mind) Sodalite: keep your calm. Meditate, keep the dream alive. positive confirmation If he wavers and feels restless, he has to find ways to unwind, and nurture himself. He has come a very long way.

*This reading is alleged and for entertainment purposes only*

[aeternus-art]

Some Random Tips and Ponderings With a Seasoned Shifter

with additional commentary on states of being

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

Hello! I’m a shifter and manifestor, and I wanted to compile some tips that I’ve been echoing in the comments here and there, as well as some recent solidifications in my understanding.

I’m not new to tumblr, or the shifting reddit ((you can find mine here) I answer commented questions on there in-depth, its worth checking out pinky swear), but I am new to Shiftblr. I’ve heard that the community here is lovely, so I thought I’d give it a shot.

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My attempts to put my experiences into words over the years comprise predominantly of Law of Assumption and some other aspects of spiritual practices. While this is the best way for me, it may not be the best way for you and that’s totally fine! As always, take what you like and leave the rest. I’ll be happy to explain or expand on concepts in the comments. :)

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

｡𖦹°⭒. ˚ ｡. ˚ ☁︎

ׂ 𓈒 ⋆ ۪𓍊𓋼𓆏𓋼𓍊 𓈒 ⋆

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1.There is no separation between you and your dr self, in the same sense that all matter is made up of energy and energy is everywhere touching everything.

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2. If you like imagining physical things and don’t have any ideas for a scene to familiarize yourself with your dr body, you could pick a song (that could have emotional significance to your dr self)and an instrument, and then imagine how that instrument feels under your fingers, the clothes on your body, where are you sitting, what does the temperature feel like, how does the song make your dr self feel and why, etc etc.

2a. By doing an activity in your imaginings, you don’t have to have sole hyper focus on just being in your body, it’s a little more chill. I have adhd, so i find the more stimulus, the better sometimes.

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3. If you struggle with imagining physical things, you could make a personal dr self playlist. I’m talkin manually pick out all the songs and build a playlist yourself. Music is energy and waves, and it can be an immensely helpful tool in allowing yourself to occupy your dr self

3a. I bring this up because later on I talk about afternoon/mid-morning imaginings. I find that by repeating dr self events while having an attatched playlist to the state, it becomes much easier to enter a kind of flow state where everything comes more naturally as opposed to manually thinking thoughts.

This goes off of the ladder experiment from neville goddard. something glossed over with goddard is that feeling is not emotion. Feeling is sensation. a more general, expansive version of a feeling is a state. A state, i.e. state of being, is a state that you can occupy as you are, at your source, pure conscious. Think kind of like the different eras of your current life and the “vibe”.

Once you figure out how to occupy this state (through any method/means that work for you) until it feels normal, you’re basically in your dr.

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4. “You’re already your dr self. You’re already in your dr.” -Okay so yes, but let’s talk about it because I see this tripping some people up.

Shifting is occupying one state that comes with one reality, and then adjusting your perspective and imaginings to your dr self’s state, with the intention that your drs physical 3d reality will express itself. In order to do this, you occupy your dr self’s state, and it can be very difficult if you are currently occupying a state to the point where it feels like an extremely heavy coat.

4a. I once talked about this back when I posted on here. You are not your physical body. As Marina said, “I am not my body, not my mind or my brain Not my thoughts or feelings, I am not my DNA I am the observer, I’m a witness of life I live in the space between the stars and the sky” You are not your emotions. This is why you can shift while feeling a whole slew of emotions. You are energy, ever flowing, and forever connected to everything else in the conceivable multi-universe. Your emotions come from your physical 3d body which is just another reflection, ever-changeable

A single tiny star can cause ripples across our entire universe. This isn’t just a spiritual concept. I just like to think that spirituality/the exploration of the multiverse is ahead of its science. Magic is just science that hasn’t caught up yet, imo.

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*5. Remember when doing your attempt- you’re shifting to be the person, not the place. Occupy the state of your dr self, and then experience your dr (in imagination/4d) through the lense of your dr self. That is what shifting is. You’re shifting the state you occupy (in your 4d/imagination), and the outer world shifts alongside you

If you struggle to get into a flow state (thoughts and feelings and imaginings coming naturally) with your state of being, it can sometimes be like an old truck that won’t start unless you manually give it a push. ponder on the life of your dr self and take into account the lenses you are looking through. How have their life experiences changed their view, perspectives, beliefs, etc. you can ask yourself questions and then answer them interview style. It may take a couple of times before you are familiar with yourself to just have the thoughts come naturally.

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6. If you feel like you are chasing after your dr self/dr, like karate kid learning how to catch the chicken, it may be of use to take a couple minutes to reorient yourself. Take some deep breaths. you’re okay. You’re gonna be just fine. It’s chill, and if it’s not chill, you’ve gotten through all your toughest battles up unto this point.

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7. Meditation/mindfulness/learning to be here now/grounding is worth investing in. It will do you good in any lifetime. You don’t have to sit still to do it. You don’t have to clear your mind. The mind being clear is an effect of the practice, not something to try and actively go.

7a. If I could summarize how to practice being present in an extremely short way, it would be that the past has spent its time with you already and the future will soon- let yourself just exist in the here and now. Start with feeling your fingertips and work your way up, and try to really feel the surface you’re on,

7b. If you like doing this, you can do this with your cr self and once you’re relaxed, do it in your imagination as your dr self. Look the scene until you’ve felt your dr in your imagination to the best of your ability go with the flow. Don’t like something you started with? Okay, change it. This process doesn’t need to be super uber serious. let yourself lighten the load. Let it go.

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8. An analogy for letting go because I see this tripping some people up too: If I want to pick up a ball, but I am currently holding another, I must first let go of the ball I am holding. If you (your consciousness) wants to hold a different state of being (and thus a different reality), it becomes infinitely easier for some people to have a bridge in between this reality and the next. You can make bridges with lots of things, such as the void state, mind awake body asleep, lucid dreams, etc.

When talking “letting go” “ I think it’s important to note that all you have to do is turn your attention away from the state of being you don’t want to be and become indifferent to it. You don’t have to fight it or react, just simply choose a response that comes from a place of knowing that you’re good, and everything’s chill.

You can also think of it like your mental state being a boat on a body of water and you’re only job is to relax and occupy your chosen state. When you occupy this state, you give the motor power to take you to the right shore. The boat already has its course set out, all you have to do is keep powering the motor.

"The time it takes for your desire to manifest is directly proportional to the naturalness of your desire.” - Neville Goddard. How do you make it natural? You repeat and continue to occupy the state with a brazen impudence.

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9. I personally use midday meditations/naps to imagine being in my dr, and then I’ll shift at night. I find it’s easier to be in creation mode during the day when I have energy to spare and then shift at night, when all I have to do is vibe as my dr self.

sometimes my afternoon imaginings turn into shifts- which can actually be a little frustrating when i have a new dr or one that i want to make changes to.

If I can’t sit down in the afternoon/mid-morning to do my ~imaginings~, I’ll just do it with my eyes open- sometimes it’s even easier depending on if I’m doing/what type of activity is being done. I like to try to occupy the state throughout the day- I use bathroom breaks because they’re already alloyed into the day.

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10. I am an utter sucker for pinterest (if you hate ads, tap on the three dots, tap hide, and then this doesnt pertain to me. do this to like 20ish and then the ads should stop for a week or two.

I think that pinterest boards allow you to really capture something reflective of the state of being of your dr self. I like to look through my board and listen to music during my afternoon “creation sessions” before a shift, and then once again before the shift itself.

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11. Detaching is just letting go in a different font, but with a little extra step. Detaching for me is detaching from the outcome- I use this in manifestation as well. Remember that your reality comes from you, it doesn’t happen to you.

By occupying the state of your dr self, your 3d reality will shift on. it’s. own. in direct reflection of you. detaching is just understanding this and not panicking when it seems like it’s not working.

When you are occupying the state of your dr self, you don’t need to worry about getting to your dr. In the same breath, if nothing has seemed like it’s worked up unto this point- try assessing from a different angle. Okay so maybe you HAVE tried literally everything and have for years. Alright. LOA would say something about your state is preventing you. Only you can go inside and figure it out. Acceptance of circumstances is the first step to change. You can’t change something you won’t look at.

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For me, my inability to succeed was due in-part to holding onto my dr like a lifeline, rather than just a place I visit. I was unable to occupy my dr self state, because in this reality I was forcing and pushing the process. I didn’t understand that when you want to change the reflection, you must first change yourself

I’ve found that multiple times throughout this journey, I come to the same answers, but I had to shift my perspective first to see, understand, and experience why it was the right one.

I know i’ve successfully shifted my perspective when the way i naturally approach and view things has changed.

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edit: one last little thing. a weird metaphor/analogy for my shifting process. I have a bowl that I fill with little pebbles I find (4d dr imaginings of feelings, thoughts, memories, pieces of the state). once this bowl is full to my liking, I can transform the bowl into a bag and carry it around with me (occupying the state) wherever I go, I no longer have to manually hold it. now, my only job is to just keep walking the path with my backpack (my state) until I reach my destination

edit2: a side note but i feel when applying and practicing these things, a might consistency with the practice is a good perspective. you're not forcing, and there's no rush, so you need only lightly hold your dr self

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Alrighty! That’s all for now!! As i said above, let me know if you have questions, and happy shifting!!

[kumikokane]

Moonlight song competition cards

SR Whitney R. Bristol

"O-oh man, there's so many people... I sure hope March actually got the dress code correct."

SR March Hawthorne

"Hah! Nah, I totally nailed the dress code. See? I know what I'm doing. Just sit back and have fun, I'll take care of the complicated stuff."

Some art I made for @sunnysidesevenup 's event! This was really fun, I enjoyed the ocean-esque theme a lot. Here's the full body outfits I designed for them:

For Whitney, I decided I wanted to go with a jellyfish inspired look. The little ribbons attached to her skirt are supposed to be like tentacles, and the layers are transparent because a lot of jellyfish are too. I drew her barefoot here, but in my mind thats really only during the actual preformence. She'd bring a pair of sandles or flats to wear around town, cause concrete and sand get HOT in the sun. I've burned my feet way too many times going to the beach. I also added a little clock to her headpiece, because she's inspired by the white rabbit but I couldn't figure out how else to incorporate the staple pocket watch. I absolutely adore the way her outfit turned out, but all the layers being transparent makes them such a pain to draw LMAO 😭 Never again....... *I whisper as I imagine myself drawing a groovy art for her*

For March's, I didn't really think an animal theme would fit him? So instead I decided to take some inspiration from sunken treasure chests/pirate ships. I gave him a coin belt cause gold coins, he's also wearing a net because it kinda makes me think of worn down sails and stuff. I replaced his usual clunky earring with huge pearls, and instead of a headpiece I had him stick stray pieces of coral in his hair. The leaves on his right knee are supposed to be like seaweed, and the outfit is covered in barnacles because uh. Yeah! I'm so bad at explaining things sorry guys 😔 I'm just praying yall see the vision

Along with the drawings, I also wrote a little story! I'm gonna leave it at the bottom so you don't have to scroll through it to read my notes. It's not very long, but I had free time and thought it'd be fun to write something about how they got to the competition in the first place, since it wasn't by conventional means. I don't write often, but I might write a little more for this when I have free time. I've got a little story going on in my head and it'd be cool to try and put it somewhere. Any criticism is appreciated, I'm always looking to improve my writing skills :) Once again, this was a lot of fun to make! Both the story and the outfits, and I'm happy I could participate. Not good at putting my thoughts out but uh ⭐️ gold star!

"So... That's it? That's why Cay Cay the cake slice is gonna be gone?" March tilted his head to the side, the large piercings on his ears clattering against his phone mic. "Arlo, Arlo.... Sounds familiar. I'm sure I've heard that name pass my ears before. Can't really remember though- he must not be important. Well, maybe a little bit if Cater knows him."

Whitney winces, adjusting the grip she had on her phone as she walked back and forth in her empty dorm room. "Uh, I-I think that's.. Well, I mean..." She sighs, trying to find the words. "You don't go to our school, so of course you wouldn't know people from here. I'm more surprised the name actually sounds familiar to you, I didn't think you've heard of anyone outside of Heartslabyul."

"Oh, he's not a Heartslabyul student? Makes more sense. What's he look like, then? Maybe I saw him in passing once, or something." March tries his best to recall any information he might have on anyone named Arlo.

"Arlo..? Uh, well... He has like, black fluffy hair with blonde bangs. And greenish eyes? I think?" Whitney stops, trying to think of any good descriptions of him. "Oh, he's short. Shorter than me. He's part of the newspaper club. Um... He's likes to take pictures of flowers and stuff."

"Huh... Little guy who likes to take pictures?" March scratches at his head. "... Oh. Oh! OH! Ha, that's the little loverboy!" He suddenly starts laughing hysterically.

"Little... Loverboy? That's not really a word I think most people would use to describe him. A-are you sure we're talking about the same person..?"

"Absolutely! I know the little guy veryyy well! Even if he doesn't know a lot about me." March takes a swig from his water bottle, still trying to calm down his laughter. "Oh, man! Imagining him, singing? That's hilarious, I didn't think he had it in him."

Whitney's ears twitch as she listens to March laugh. "Uh... Okay, explanation? Maybe..?? When you say it like that, i-it just sounds like you're stalking him."

"Oh please, he wishes I was stalking him. Almost everything I know about him is against my will. Yeah, I call him loverboy because he's like... Dating Neige, or something. I don't really know, but Neige will sometimes spend the entirety of lunch gushing about the guy. I call him little because, he's short. And it makes him mad when I call him little."

"So... You have met him? Since when? He doesn't come anywhere near Heartslabyul. At least, I haven't seen him around here."

"Yeah, once. Maybe twice, I can't remember. Neige was talking about the guy so much I just had to see what all the buzz was about. He was so angry, like a little Chihuahua, it was fucking hilarious bro." He says, chucking at the memory. "But yeah, I just followed Neige here once to meet him before going to the unbirthday party."

"You followed Neige to meet Arlo? It still sounds like you're stalking him, March. Do I need to report you to school security? I have the app, you know."

"Yeah yeah yeah, whatever. As if your shitty headmage would do anything about it anyways." March rolls his eyes, thinking about the NRC headmage. The only way he could picture the guy actually doing anything is if it made it on the news or something. "Back to the topic at hand, please? So, do you know where the town is?"

".. Huh..?" She pauses again. "Uh, no, not really. B-but if you need the address, Cater would probably give it to you." Whitney takes a seat at her bed now, a bad feeling crawling up her spine.

"Nah, won't ask him. The town's name is what again? We can find it on Google maps or something." Shuffling comes from the other side of the phone. "You're on speaker now, say hi to the wind."

Whitney frowned, not liking the way the conversation was heading. "We? Wait, why- Hi wind... W-why do we need to figure out where the town is? I'm sure Cater will remember to post pictures and videos, if that's what you want-"

"Nah, this ain't about him Nini. We're gonna go to the competition too." March declares, texting Whitney a link on Google maps to the town's location. "Look, see? It's not that bad. We don't even need a car or anything, you can just create a rabbit hole and boom! We'll be there in no time."

"You want to go to the competition?! Why?!" Whitney yells out louder then intended, suddenly covering her mouth and whispering into the phone. "W-we can't go! We weren't invited!"

"Really? So what if we weren't invited? It's a public event, isn't it? We don't need anyone's permission to be there. It'll be easy, we'll just go sign up and preform and then win the big grand prize at the end! You don't even have to sing, you can just sit back and look pretty while I enchant the crowd with my dazzling vocals. Hear, listen-" March takes a deep breath, preparing to demonstrate his singing skills.

"No!" Whitney interrupts, "Y-you don't get it! They all know who I am! Everyone i-in the group he brought along- Arlo knows who I am! A-and I don't think he likes me very much..." She says with a dejected tone, unbraiding her hair to try and de-stress. "I-I can't just show up to his home town for some event! Do you know how weird that is?? He's in the newspaper club too, he'll probably tell everyone what a creep I am and then everyone at school will know! 'Hey guys, uhh you know that weird bunny girl from class C? Yeahhh she like totally followed me to my hometown and then tried to play it off by bringing her friend with her.' I can't live like that!"

March scowls, huffing loudly into the phone mic to voice his displeasure. "Well, first of all don't interrupt me. Second of all, there's no reason to freak out. He's just an asshole who hates everyone, his hatred won't be specifically aimed at you. If anything, he'll probably aim it at me cause I like pissing him off- Always remember Nini, please everyone is hard. Making everyone mad is easy, and funny."

Whitney stays silent, brushing through her hair with her fingers. "... I-I don't know, March. Even if nobody will hate my guts for the rest of my school life..." She trails off, not knowing how to finish her sentence.

March groans dramatically at this, moving his phone closer to his mouth as he speaks. "Nini! You're such a party pooper cause you're so indecisive. I'm making the decision for you, we're going to the competition. You're gonna have fun, so quit fussing about every little detail! One of these days we're gonna get you some benzodiazpines for whatever anxiety you got, I swear." March mumbles the last part under his breath, rolling his eyes. "I'll do all the planning and stuff, just be ready to head out by tomorrow, k? I guess by like, 3 or something. Great, bye!"

"W-what? March, wait-!" She tries to stop, but March suddenly hangs up the phone on her, leaving her alone in the quiet dorm. She sighs, taking out her pocket watch to check the time. "3pm tomorrow..? We'd probably arrive before Arlo's group does. I'll have to take all my assignments with me, and triple tell Riddle that I'll be leaving. And pick out all my money for the trip to make sure we don't starve..." Whitney frowns, not exactly fond of this suddenly change in her usual schedule. "I hate taking trips..." She shakes her head, her ears twitching again as she stands up from her bed and looks around. "... Well, we're doing this I guess. Better start preparing.."

Thanks for reading!

[majimasleftasscheek]

Who/where did you get your back tattoo done if you don’t mind me asking? I am looking to get Kiryu’s one day, and was wondering where you found someone who did such a good job!

I got mine at a local place (hotrod tattoo, AZ, artist Chuy) tho if you're looking to get something for yourself done, I would rec checking out artist portfolios at places of your choosing and seeing which you prefer! tbh a lot of this will come down to what you want out of the tat and what the artist is willing to do 👀

so like, for me, I wanted majima's tat done 1:1, style matching and all so it took me a few tries to find an artist who was willing to emulate the art exactly since some artists prefer doing their own thing or whatnot. the guy I found had a portfolio full of tats from other media in 1:1 styles as well as in general such a broad range of styles that I felt convinced he could get me exactly what I wanted 😊 plus he had a few japanese style tats so I could see how he'd handle things like the dark clouds typical of these tats (which is like 70% of majima's lol)

so if you're looking for kiryu's I would say ask yourself do you want it 1:1, or an interpretation, or something else, etc and go from there when you're looking for an artist and make it *very* clear your intentions just so communication is smooth and no one misinterprets things. and definitely don't settle if you're not 100% happy with whoever you find! I had to go thru multiple people and talk to them about the process till I really felt comfortable with the guy I finally picked. since these sorts of tats are huge af and expensive, defo make sure you have no regrets or hesitations when you start 👌

also thank you! I love my tat so much hougghghhg

[starredblood]

NOWHERE GIRL

PART ONE

kang-saebyeok x fem!reader

synopsis: desperate to find a place to stay, your former high school friend ji-yeong let’s you crash at her apartment for the week. but things get complicated when her roommate doesn’t seem too happy about your arrival.

wc. 1.6k

warnings: none? | authors note: first ever fic woo-hoo! will try to finish this fic series before classes start next week but not sure how many parts this will end up being lol.

(nowhere girl masterlist)

“No. Absolutely not.”

Ji-yeong groans and throws her head back in tantrum. But if Sae-byeok says no, then it’s a no. Always being firm on her stance, it’s practically impossible to make Sae-byeok change her mind.

“But she’s literally right outside of the apartment building. Come on just one week and she’ll be gone like that!” Ji-yeong snaps her finger and shoots her roommate a sly smile. But because Sae-byeok was anything less than swayed she had to resort to pouting. “Please, Sae-byeok. After I ran away she was the only person willing to let me stay at their place until I got back on my feet. It’ll be awkward if I couldn’t do the same for her. And—And she’s such a sweet girl, nothing like me because I know you’d hate the idea of having two me’s running around!”

Sae-byeok rolls her eyes. She put herself through mental and physical obstacles to finally be able to afford to rent an apartment with Ji-yeong and to finally be the guardian Cheol deserves. After two months of tranquility in their new place, Ji-yeong suddenly wants to bring a fourth person into their tight knit sanctuary. A total stranger—she can’t imagine the discomfort Cheol will feel. It took him an entire summer to get used to Ji-yeongs presence.

“No.” Sae-byeok says, unamused.

“I will do you and Cheol’s chores for a month and you can hog the television as much as you want I won’t complain! Come on, just one week.” she crosses her fingers and begins batting her eyelashes.

Sae-byeok pauses to think for a minute.

“Just one week.”

“Yup! One week.” Ji-yeong nods.

“And you have to pick up Cheol from school on Mondays.”

“Ugh, fine whatever. So, is that a yes?” Ji-yeong groans. When Sae-byeok hesitantly nods she raises a fist in the air in victory. “Yes! Thank you, Sae, thank you! I’ll bring her up now—don’t worry she’s as harmless as a butterfly.”

Ji-yeong sprints to the front door and Sae-byeok slumps down on the couch. She grabs the throw pillow closest to her and presses it to her face to let out a massive groan. By the time Sae-byeok finishes letting out her frustrations on the pillow she hears the front door swing open and two people giggling like schoolgirls.

“Sae-byeok come here I want to introduce you to my ex-guardian angel!” Ji-yeong says, enthralled.

Frowning, Sae-byeok removes the pillow off her face and sluggishly gets off the couch. She’s not looking forward to this dreadful upcoming week with you around.

From first impressions, Ji-yeong was right about your delicate appearance. From your light denim wash overalls to your chipped pink nail polish, you were definitely the opposite of both Sae-byeok and Ji-yeong aesthetic wise.

“Hi, Sae-byeok it’s so nice to meet you!” you greet bashfully and give her a courteous bow. “Thank you so much for letting me crash here for a bit. I’ll do my best to not be a disturbance or anything like that.”

The moment you locked eyes with Sae-byeok you felt intimidated. Ji-yeong previously warned you about her cold nature so you braced yourself to be iced as you made your way to their apartment.

Sae-byeok bowed back ever so slightly, her hands dug deep in the pockets of her sweats, and her lean body easily towering over you.

Ji-yeong sensed that the tension was about to become awkward so she grabs you by your arm and leads you to her bedroom.

“My bed is small but we can definitely both fit as long as you don’t mind a little contact.” Ji-yeong explains.

You glanced around her room. It was messy, with posters placed crookedly on the wall, socks and undergarments scattered all over the floor, and a bag of open chips on the undone bed.

“Oh, uh, I’ll just sleep on the couch I don’t want to bother you anymore than I already have.” you say, laughing nervously. Was it too presumptuous of you to oppose her offer because of her messy room? You didn’t lie technically. You did feel ashamed to have to ask Ji-yeong for this huge favor.

“Are you sure?” she raises a brow.

“Positive.”

⊹ ✿・・───・・✦・・───・・✿

Ji-yeong was sworn to secrecy by you not to tell Sae-byeok why you had to stay at their place temporarily. But Sae-byeok isn’t annoyed because she wants to know what happened to you, it’s because she had the decency to let you stay so she has the right to know some backstory—but Ji-yeong remains tight lipped.

Sae-byeok was firm on having her walls secured throughout your stay.

The day you arrived, all Sae-byeok kept worrying about was how Cheol will take the news as she made her way to pick him up from school.

When you and Cheol met, the boy timidly greeted you before scurrying off to the room him and Sae-byeok share. He remained there for the rest of the day and Sae-byeok had to pull her roommate aside to tell her about how awful this plan was and that you had to leave immediately.

“She’s making him uncomfortable!” Sae-byeok argues.

Ji-yeong rubs her fingers on the sides of her temples. “Calm down, jeez. I’m telling you Cheol will warm up to her—“

“He shouldn’t have to warm up to her because she shouldn’t even be here.”

“Sae-byeok, you’re being dramatic. Just give him a day or two and he’ll be fine trust me.”

Sae-byeok wasn’t happy about this situation at all.

The morning after, Sae-byeok wakes up alone in her room with no sight of Cheol. She doesn’t think much of it at first since it’s Saturday, until she remembers that you were here. So she leaps from her bed and basically sprints to the living room. And to her complete and utter surprise, she sees you helping Cheol draw on a sketch book.

“Be careful with oil pastels, they break easily if you put too much pressure on them so draw on the paper lightly.” you advise the boy, your voice soothing and assuring.

Cheol’s tongue poke out between his teeth in concentration as he scribbles lines across the paper.

That’s when you sensed a set of eyes on you. You whip your head around and end up making eye contact with Sae-byeok.

“Morning.” you mumble to her before focusing back on Cheol’s painting because you can’t look into her eyes another second longer.

Sae-byeok inhales and exhales deeply before making her way to the kitchen. She’s conflicted. Cheol never became comfortable with someone this quickly. What, just because you can draw you are so likable?

Soon after, Ji-yeong pops out of her room in her work vest. When she heads towards the kitchen, she takes one quick glance at you and Cheol before smirking.

“I told you.” she whispers to Sae-byeok. The taller girl only scoffs as her response.

You appear right after. “Good morning, Ji-yeong.”

“Hey. Did you sleep well on the couch?”

“Yeah, I did. Thanks again—for everything. Both of you.” you say. You suck in a deep breath, hesitant and careful with your actions. “So uh, I’m working later this afternoon at the art gallery I told you about. I was wondering if you’d all like to go see the art there? All free, of course.”

Sae-byeok raises an eyebrow. Was this your way of getting into everyone’s good graces?

Ji-yeong shrugs. “Why not? It sounds cool. I get off work early today and Sae-byeok—“

“Is busy.” Sae-byeok cuts her off.

You nod. “Of course, no problem.”

“You are?” Ji-yeong retorts.

Sae-byeok throws her a glare trying to communicate with her eyes to tell her to be quiet. Ji-yeong gulps.

“Oh, yeah you are. Sorry I forgot.” she laughs. “But I can go—and take Cheol, of course. That poor boy needs to explore the world and I’m sure an art gallery will cultivate his—“

“Stop talking.” Sae-byeok through her teeth. You look back and forth at the girls, nervous that you’re about to start a squabble between them.

“How about next time?” you say. “I’m interning there until the end of summer break so you guys have plenty of time to schedule a day to come visit.”

“Great!” Ji-yeong beams. She grabs the sandwich Sae-byeok has been preparing for herself and stuffs it in her lunch box. “I gotta go I’m already late so see you guys later!”

Sae-byeok mutters curses aimed at her roommate. She begins prepping another sandwich until she realizes that you were still standing there fiddling with your hands.

“What do you want?” she asks, hostile yet quiet in classic Sae-byeok fashion.

Your eyes widen and your face becomes flushed at her aggression, almost forgetting what you came here to do.

“I just wanted to apologize if I overstepped my boundaries.” you explain, your gentle voice being a contrast to Sae-byeok’s. “I was working on my art project and I saw your little brother was watching me curiously so I let him play around with my old oil pastels. I hope you don’t mind.”

Sae-byeok sighs. She tilts her head slightly to observe Cheol who was in his own world coloring. She never even considered to buy him anything to draw with—she can only afford enough for food and shelter.

“It’s fine.”

Not wanting to pester her any longer you go back to the couch. Cheol starts explaining his drawing but you start zoning out trying to decide if you should just walk out of this apartment and never look back. Right now, you would rather venture out on the streets than have Sae-byeok constantly ice you for a week. But can you really survive out there? Maybe if you just avoid her for the entirety of your stay you will be fine.

[greenwitchfromthewoods]

you in my eyes [5] l Javier Peña

Summary:  you weren't friends and you certainly weren't planning anything more together

Warnings:  smut, fingering, kissing, enemies (?) to lovers, misogyny and sexism at work, some bad language, Murphy shows up, alcohol

A/N: I don't know how many people read this series, but I wanted to add another chapter. Maybe I can make someone happy with it.

your feedback is very important to me and I want to thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. I secretly hope you like this story.🖤 sorry for all the mistakes

[previous chapter]

[masterlist]

You turned down the TV and sat up on the couch, someone was knocking on the door. It was already late Friday evening, which you decided to spend at home. After Messina announced that O'Connell had been urgently called to the States, you felt calmer. That's why you didn’t go to any pub or place like that.

The knock repeated and you finally approached the door.

"Javier?" the man on the other side smiled “What are you doing here?”

"Am I interrupting something?" he asked, a little confused.

"No. But it's late. Is something wrong?"

He raised his hand, in which he held the bottle of whiskey, and waved it, smiling slyly.

"I won the bet," he boasted.

You crossed your arms over your chest and leaned against the door frame, looking at him with interest. Peña was pleased to note that you were wearing a green baggy t-shirt, probably from the department's supply, and your hair was still damp from the shower. You looked nice.

"There was a bet, back at the office. The guys were betting on when O'Connell would give up and come home." Javier explained. "And I won."

"You bet he'd leave right now?"

"No. I said someone would punch him in the face."

You burst out laughing. And even Peña laughed, still holding his bottle in front of you.

"We're partners, so you deserve it, too."

"Oh! How generous of you! You flatter me, Agent Peña."

You bit your lip as if you were thinking about something, then gently pushed the door open, nodding slightly. 

He entered the room, bringing with him the smell of cologne and cigarette smoke.

"I wasn't expecting guests." You announced, pulling glasses out of the cabinet.

"I was wondering if I'd find you home." He mumbled, unscrewing the bottle and giving you a furtive glance. "Didn't you want to go out somewhere?"

You put the glasses down on the coffee table with a clatter and sat down on the couch, pulling your legs under you. "I wasn't in the mood. I think I'll skip places like that for a while."

Javier poured the amber liquid into the glasses and handed one to you, sitting next to you.

"¡Salud!" He raised his glass in a toast, and you did the same. "What are we drinking to?"

"Peace of mind." You replied. "Unless you have other suggestions?"

"Naah. That's good too."

You tipped the glasses down and Javier filled them again.

"Nobody's waiting for you?" you asked as he pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his jacket and lit one. "I think you'd find better company than me."

"Oh! I definitely would!" Javier chuckled, blowing a wisp of smoke from his mouth. "Don't tell anyone I came here, you'll only ruin my reputation."

You laughed and covered your eyes with your hand as if you were thinking about something. "God! Can you imagine that?" Javier raised his eyebrows expectantly. "What the girls in the office say about you, what the guys say about me... And what would they say if we started sleeping together? Damn! Loise would go gray in an hour."

"Murphy would beat the shit out of me." Javier stated, sipping his drink. "He probably thinks you're too good for me."

"And he's right." you shrugged "I could be with the commander, but I'd trade him for a simple agent? Sorry, Peña, no chance."

"Fuck, you're a menace." he snorted, shaking his head in disbelief.

It was nice. He sat with you, talked about work and life. Melancholic stories from your past life, no plans for the future, because where you were you didn't really plan anything. Neither of you delved deeper, because why would you, it was just a friendly conversation over a Friday night drink.

After the third glass, he noticed your legs, exactly when you got up to go to the bathroom. The skimpy shorts gave Javier room for imagination. His eyes, dark as night, followed you involuntarily, and then he cleared his throat.

The alcohol was coursing through his veins, he felt hot, so he took off his jacket and threw it on the armchair next to him, rested his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. He didn't even hear you come back. Only the feeling of you sitting down next to him, the smell of your shampoo caught his attention.

"I'm a terrible housekeeper." you stated finishing your drink, Javier raised his head looking at you with interest "I don't have anything to eat, nothing I could give you." you pouted and he chuckled.

"Please, hermosa." he sighed "If I wanted to eat something, I would take you out for dinner. I have a hard time believing you cook anything yourself, to be honest."

You raised your eyebrows in surprise "You're suggesting that..."

"I'm not suggesting anything." he interrupted you and instinctively placed his hand on your thigh, stroking it gently "You just work a lot, like me."

"Maybe if we had someone to cook for sometime..." you pondered, completely not noticing his gesture, which only made Javier not withdraw his hand "Murphy and Connie, they definitely cook."

"Not as often as they both might claim." he raised an eyebrow and you laughed "But Connie is good at it. Anyway, you'll find out tomorrow."

"It's nice that they invited me, I guess..." you lowered your eyes, feeling a bit embarrassed "I mean... We don't know each other that well, right?"

Peña frowned.

"What the hell are you talking about? If it wasn't for you, they would still be collecting our fragments from the surrounding trees by now."

"Don't say that."

"But it's true." he moved closer to you, his hand moved higher, now resting on your hip, his thumb stroking your body hidden under your shirt. Neither of you felt embarrassed by this, maybe it was because of the drinks you had, or maybe it was that night. "You're doing a great job here. Everyone can see it."

"They think I'm a slut." you mumbled almost incomprehensibly and Javier had to tilt his head slightly to hear your words "No matter what I do, I'm labeled an easy girl. You know... I try not to worry about it, people will always talk, but sometimes... Sometimes it hurts."

He grabbed your chin and lifted it slightly. Beautiful brown eyes stared at you intently. "The most important thing is what you think about yourself. Double standards suck, you said so yourself and you were right. Surely if I say you're the coolest chica in the office, it won't change anything, right?"

You rolled your eyes. "Please..."

"And you have the prettiest legs." Peña added quickly, you chuckled "Your smile is also very pretty. And when you're excited about something, your eyes widen and shine so nicely." you snorted, your hand closing over his, which was still holding your chin. "And when you yelled at me the first time, I got hard."

The smile disappeared from your lips, which slightly widened in surprise. You fell silent, both of you a little surprised by this bold confession.

"Javier..."

His name was quieter than a whisper, but he heard it clearly. He leaned even closer. Warm breath brushed your lips.

"This is really a very bad idea." you said with difficulty.

"You can stop me, hermosa." His lips lightly brushed yours, you closed your eyelids, inhaling the air.

"Did I really make you hard?"

"Mhmm..." you didn't see the smile of satisfaction on his lips. "They call it difficult working conditions."

It was a split second and you felt his lips on yours. All dilemmas disappeared, and when you kissed him back he knew he was gone. Your hands instantly found their way to his face, your fingers tangled in soft hair and you pulled him closer, parting your lips.

An invitation that Javier read flawlessly. His tongue slipped into your mouth, you tasted the whiskey, and that was even more captivating for him. The kisses were intense, deep as if you both could finally give vent to what had been brewing inside you for a long time. You felt him squeeze your buttock and you moaned, but his tongue effectively muffled you. So you didn't wait for anything more, in an instant you slid onto his lap and clung to his body. Javier felt your breasts under the thin T-shirt, you didn't have a bra. He knew that, of course he had already glanced at your breasts, but when he felt it…

You pulled away from his lips for a moment and looked into his dark eyes.

"You can back out at any time. No hard feelings." you said. "I don't want you to feel..."

"Used?" Javier laughed quietly. "I guess I'm the one who should be saying things like that, don't you think?" his hands gripped your buttocks tighter, making you feel the bulge in his jeans.

"Oh!"

"That's a clear answer, I guess."

He lifted himself up and his lips captured yours again. The excitement grew in your lower abdomen with every passing second, with every kiss and touch. His strong hands shamelessly slid under your shirt, first stroking your back, and after a moment he grabbed your breasts. He kneaded your tits, rolled your nipples between his fingers, and you moaned as much as his tongue in your mouth would allow you.

"Take it off." he ordered, tugging at your shirt.

"Do it yourself."

"You're something else, you know that?"

You bit your lip, smiling obediently, raising your arms up so the shirt could be removed. Javier kissed you the second your lips peeked out from behind your collar. Damn, he was a threat to you.

Large hands explored your body, testing every inch of it, teasing every nerve. Could you want more? God, you didn't have to ask, he wanted to give it all to you.

When he slid his hand into your shorts, you gasped loudly.

"Fuck, you've got a real pool here, sweetheart." he mumbled, smiling slyly. "Would you like me to take care of that?"

A nod.

"Words, hermosa. Just words."

"Yes, please."

He ran his fingers over your folds, hot and wet, knowing perfectly well that he would be able to slide them inside without a problem. And so he did. And when you threw your head back, sighing quietly, he marveled at how wonderful the sight was.

Hot lips closed over one of your nipples, sucking and teasing with his tongue, fingers moving in and out, searching for that spot that could take you apart.

"Shit, Javier..." you moaned.

You clenched your fingers in his hair, hips rising slowly and rhythmically as he finger fucked you. Why did this have to feel so good? You couldn't remember the last time you felt like this, when someone had made you feel so...

"Oh fuck!"

"I think I found it." Javier chuckled, kissing your cleavage, your skin was slightly salty from sweat but still smelled of soft soap and you "I'm holding you, hermosa, take what you need."

He crossed his fingers with his thumb massaging your clit, the pressure was perfect and soon he felt your walls clench around his fingers, your body tensing and you held your breath for a moment feeling the pleasure spread through your body.

You rested your head on Javier's shoulder breathing deeply, his hands stroking your thighs sending a pleasant shiver through your heated skin.

"That was the first one." Peña finally spoke.

"The first one?" you lifted your head and looked at him curiously "Planning more of these?"

"Oh, sweetheart..." he sighed, brushing the strands of hair from your face, then bringing his lips to yours and stealing a tender kiss "At least two more tonight." another kiss "Two in the morning." another one "And how much more will you allow me to have with you, because - fuck - I want to see you cum again. I knew I'd get in trouble with you."

Your hand stroked the back of his neck, you could probably let him have a little more of you.

It was like an addiction. Javier was addicted, and you were his best drug. Before he knew it, you were crawling under his skin, coursing through his veins, and rushing to his head. Sometimes it felt like every time he saw you, his addiction grew.

His fingerprints were all over your body, and he proudly wore yours, even though no one was around to see it. You kept the fact that you were dating a secret, even though you never talked about it like that.

God! You never thought you could fall for a guy like that, and even more so that you would let him do things like that to you. Because sex with Javier was on another level. 

Never before, no one had made you feel so desired, enough, beautiful, and fulfilled. Peña gave you the best orgasms, the ones that left you silent for a moment afterwards because you couldn't form a grammatically correct sentence in your head. The sleep problems disappeared and lazy mornings were something you loved doing with him. 

His sleepy eyes, his hot body, his ruffled hair... In the dictionary, next to the word 'sex', they should have put a picture of Javier, you were sure of that.

In your apartment or in his, in the car in the parking lot, or at work in some tight space, because you wanted a quickie. It was getting more and more intense and what you were feeling was starting to scare you a little. A little over three weeks since O'Connell left, and you felt really good. For a while.

The information about the mole in the office was bothering Messina and she had talked to you about it many times. You promised that you would revolve around it, but for some time you hadn't found any new leads. It was frustrating.

"I talked to informants, but no one would tell me anything." You muttered one evening, resigned.

Peña opened a beer and sat down with his ordered food. "Maybe you're looking in the wrong places? Maybe it's not some higher agent or something?"

"But all this information that's been leaking..." you sighed.

“Honestly, many people have access to it. Hermosa, stop stabbing your food with fork and start eating,” he replied, gesturing to your plate.

However, your gaze drifted away for a moment. Javier noticed it after a moment, huffed impatiently. "Hermosa." he repeated warningly.

"Hmm?"

"You'll have cold food." he shook his head in disbelief. "I really don't know why I'm here with you."

You looked up from your plate and smiled. Your foot, under the table, slowly slid up his leg and headed for his crotch, rubbing it lightly. "I think I know why."

He raised an eyebrow expectantly. It was nice, what was between you. Although neither of you named it. The sex was fucking amazing, you could talk or not talk at all and Javier loved it. You didn't pressure him, you didn't expect declarations or confessions. You took what he gave you, you gave just as much.

And eventually both of you started eating more or less regularly, although the last attempt at cooking ended in burnt chicken, because when Javier came back from work he had a strong urge to get into your panties.

He grabbed you at the ankle and squeezed lightly which made you smile, he loved it. You spent quite a lot of time together and he slowly started to notice the little things he liked about you. Your smile was his favorite though.

"Murphy and I have to go out of town. We'll be gone for a few days." he said watching you as you reached for his beer and took a few sips.

"Anything important? Do you have new sources?" you asked, frowning.

Javier nodded "Yeah, we want to check them out. We also need to watch one guy."

"Okay. Just watch your backs. I won't be able to save your asses there." You squealed as he gripped your calf tighter and pulled you so hard you almost fell off the chair "Peña! Fuck you!"

"You wish." he chuckled, but then turned serious "You watch your back too, hermosa. Promise me that."

And you promised, and then you gave him something so he wouldn't forget about you and would have something to think about when he and Murphy were out of town.

"Will you miss me?"

You shook your head. "I don't think so."

"I think you will." Javier stopped the car in front of the office building and turned off the engine.

It was still early, the streets were empty. You were enjoying your last moments together. His hand on your thigh squeezed you lightly, it was nice.

"Tell me you'll miss me." He looked at you with a gentle smile and those eyes of a poor puppy. "I know you have a soft spot for me."

"You wish!" you chuckled.

"I will."

There was something in his tone of voice that made the laughter die on your lips. Those ambiguous sentences made your heart beat faster, but you calmed it down every time. You didn't want it to happen so soon. And what was that anyway?

"Maybe a little." You finally sighed, his lips stretched into a smile.

"Kiss me, hermosa."

It wasn't a request, more of an order, but you didn't mind. Javier moved closer, you stroked his cheek tenderly, and then you let his lips brush yours. At first gently, because he was teasing you, and he loved doing that. Finally, you curled your fingers in his hair and Javier slid his tongue between your lips, you moaned. His hand grabbed your waist as if he wanted to pull you even closer. Damn, he kissed like a dream.

Another brush of lips, another tender touch. Finally, he rested his forehead against yours and sighed. "Maybe we still have time, huh? Murphy will definitely be late."

"I don't think so." you replied quietly.

"He's always late."

“But not today.”

Javier looked at you, surprised, and then turned around. Steve was standing in front of the hood of his car, his glasses slid down his nose and he looked at you with disbelief on his face.

You opened the door. "I guess I'll go now." you said, smiling uncertainly, "Take care of yourselves."

"You too, hermosa." Javier replied, sitting down in his seat and putting on his glasses.

Steve nodded in your direction, then walked over to the car. "Really?" he asked, staring at his friend, "You and her? Really?"

Peña didn't even look at him, "Get in."

"Is that why you haven't been so annoying lately?" Murphy chuckled, but got in and closed the door with a soft click.

The engine started and the car slowly rolled down the road.

It was strange. They managed to come back a day early. He wanted to surprise you. He even bought some oranges, which you liked so much lately. But the apartment door was closed. Javier kept knocking for a while. He glanced at his watch. It was late, so you should have…

"She left." The older man peeked out from behind the neighboring door and glared at Javier.

"Long time ago?" he asked, surprised.

The man shrugged. "I don't remember. But she looked really nice." He smiled slightly. “You must have been late, boy. If she’s not here yet…”

Javier nodded and quickly went down the stairs. Something strange tightened his insides. He didn't expect this...

☆☆☆☆

Thank you for your time.

taglist: @qpiiee @missladym1981 @axshadows @djappleblush @picketniffler @txmel @wowitsafemale @cheekychaos28 @underneath-the-sky-again @misstokyo7love

[paci-papa]

Sorry, little ones, but Papa is going to go into lecture mode for a moment.

Papa got this ask recently:

"Mr paci I gotta say all your stories make me very blushy and squirmy how do you feel about little boys who are still male but are femboys like boys who are male but want to be more feminine and soft instead of being big and strong all the time anyway yeah bye 🫣🫣"

This short little message requires an answer with a lot of nuance.

Papa believes strongly that gender is a spectrum and all people on that spectrum are valid, little or big.

Papa also believes that categorizing things into stereotypical gender binaries ignores that reality and is inherently harmful to everyone on that spectrum by either ignoring their identities or creating problematic stereotypes.

So, the short answer to this question is that, of course, Papa supports little boys who may be more stereotypically 'feminine.'

In Papa's mind, it's completely acceptable for any little to want to wear dresses or overalls or play with trucks or dolls. All that matters to Papa is that you are engaging in behavior that makes you happy!

However, Papa also received this ask today:

"I am a new diaper sissy. What would you recommend to help me get used to wearing my diapers and girly’s clothes in public? Any outfit/accessory/activity suggestions?"

Papa finds this sort of 'play,' specifically sissy play, potentially problematic.

If the reason a person is interested in engaging in a particular 'feminine' activity is because the taboo created by engaging in gender non-conforming behavior turns you on, that activity is serving to reinforce the gender binaries and stereotypes that Papa hates.

Because of that, Papa doesn't support those sorts (most notably sissy) of gender play.

I understand that this may be confusing, and that is why Papa wanted to take the opportunity to explain this.

Since I know you babies have short extension spans, here is the tldr:

All genders are valid. Gender dichotomies and stereotypes are wrong. Papa supports littles of all genders and with all interests. That said, if you fetishize gender dichotomies and stereotypes, you are part of the problem, and Papa doesn't engage in that type of play.