#it just means its super cool!

[char-lie-spirals]

So, since @gristlebloom-orchid asked, I DO have a Flesh!Graham AU and I finally sat down to put my thoughts about it into something comprehensive, and then into words! So, I figured I might as well make a post about it! Actually this is my 2nd attempt at making it because apparently version 1 was like 2 times too long for a Tumblr post or something?? Messed up :/

Warning for Flesh-typical content, mostly of the dysmorphic kind, along with some Drastic measures to "fix" that

So, the entire AU starts with one simple change - the NotThem doesn't manage to kill Graham when it attacks him. He survives by pure chance, and doesn't come out of the encounter unscathed, but no matter how much blood it spilled, at least he made it out alive!

Except, the whole thing really messes with the way he sees himself. He can barely recognize his own reflection, so many little things about it seem wrong, things he doesn't even know words/names for, but they're all just wrong wrong wrong that's not him!!

The NotThem gets a good meal out of him just... feeling like a Stranger in his own skin, so instead of finishing the job, it hangs around, sometimes pretend-attacks him just so that he locks himself in the bathroom and has nothing to do but stare in the mirror, and it's enjoying this "arrangement" very much!

It doesn't take Graham too long to pick up on the pattern. A few weeks in, he locks himself in the bathroom with nothing but a notebook on him, and ends up trying to write down what exactly bothers him in the reflection.

No matter how hard he tries, the descriptions aren't detailed enough. His face isn't "wrong", it's his eyes and nose and mouth and skin and- no, no, that's still too broad. His eye color seems too dark, and his eyelids are folded differently, and they seem too far apart, and-

The NotThem leaves him alone, satisfied enough, much faster than usual. This is the point where a realization strikes him, and all of his previous thought process gets off-track for a Stranger victim. Because you see, from his perspective, all what he knows is:

There is something herding him around, and he keeps falling for it's tricks. It torments him, and then leaves, seemingly content enough with his fear. Seemingly... fed by it. On top of that, he's barely himself through his own eyes, so to anyone else he's surely unrecognizable, just one slip up away from losing his self entirely, and is he still a person at that point? Is he a person at this point??

He doesn't feel that far off from an animal serving its purpose up until it will get slaughtered. With this one simple trick (overthinking), he has managed to change his fear of the Stranger into a fear of the Flesh! The NotThem hates him!

Does he react impulsively to this realization? Yeah, probably, since his response is to up and leave his flat instantly, only grabbing a few necessities along the way and with not intentions of coming back

He wanders for a while, feeling horrible and shuddering at each reflective surface he passes by because there is something wrong with his body, and it makes his skin crawl. Before he knows it, he's already desperate enough that he'd do just about anything to fix it

He feels he can't really trust anyone to try and fix all those little things without messing them up further, so that's off the table. He'll have to fix them on his own, with his bare hands if he has to. Then again, there's no telling if he won't mess himself up more by trying to fix things!

He decides he needs to get some practice. And some tools. And sure, he's been walking around for a while now, but it doesn't take him all that long to come across the nearest butcher store, and it's open! Just... strangely quiet. Up until,,, oh oops! uh oh!

Yeah, he kind of. Happened to walk into Jared Hopworth's Butcher Store? While the man is in the middle of disposing of a guy for the mafia? And those people were quite clear, no witnesses are allowed to leave, so... he's just stuck here now.

He's scared at first, as one would be upon walking in on a Huge guy torturing some other guy, but then... then he sees the way Jared pulls bones from the man, how he re-shapes them...

If he's going to die here, he might as well ask for help with a few of his own issues. For a start, he's pretty sure his right forearm doesn't look quite right because the bone should be a bit more squashed, and at a different angle, but that's apparently fixable???

Jared's not used to people wanting to be reshaped (this is like early-mid 2006, 6 years before the gym statement takes place, give him time), but he complies and is even more surprised by the honest positive reaction.

He asks if Graham needs help with anything else in his body, and Graham just pulls out his notebook. He knows that much fixing won't be free, but now at least one of his limbs looks his own again, he can't possibly stop now?? Not to mention, some of the bits are easier to replace or add to rather than re-shape, so... if he ends up having to lead a few people to their doom... well. So be it.

With every little change, he becomes more himself, but at the same time, strays further and further from who he used to be. And when he's finally satisfied with his results? He might just keep trying to bring more people to the butcher shop out of habit. :]

That's about it for the story I have properly planned. I do, however, have the idea that once Jared moves on to owning that gym of his, Graham will be Very helpful in finding future customers! All he has to do is approach people and kindly point out the few things he can just see are wrong about them, and then tell them he knows a place where they can fix those!

I'm not sure how/if he'll get involved with the main archives crew - maybe when Jane Prentiss traps Martin in his own home, he reaches a few similar conclusions that Graham did and that draws him in? Maybe he's been looking for the NotThem in case it slips up and can't finish the job properly again, which leads him to the institute? Maybe he happens to be one of the people Jon contacts all the way in season 3, since he managed to escape the Stranger's grasp and that might be useful? Who knows! I certainly don't, not yet!

Also I'm open to feedback on this AU since I don't cover Flesh much in my AUs and writing, so I feel a bit out of my depth? But I figured the body dysmorphia aspect of it could fit the mess I like to make of -selfs and identities when the NotThem is involved and I'm feeling a bit silly :] but I tried not to abandon the more animistic aspects of it? But again if that just Doesn't Work as well as I was hoping it would, like I said I am open to feedback!

[chloesimaginationthings]

Hear me out, Michael would think Roxy is SICK AF

[vristrogen]

something about people calling vrisrezi "toxic yuri" always puts me off. i understand the lack of words to really put their dynamic but like you know theyre in a relationship thats largely good for them right. they arent dating because "it sucks but it would be worse without each other" they genuinely really love each other a lot

[strawglicks]

my recent post abt ttcc fandom had a lot of ppl mentioning the demonization of toons and glorification of the cogs and it got me thinking about how, just because the cogs have fun lore and are fun characters, it seems people suddenly think they have to be morally good and in the right for them to enjoy the characters.

you can acknowledge the cogs are bad and still like their characters. (this doesnt mean every cog is just flat evil with no substance to their character, bc that is ALSO an annoying misunderstanding) the cogs dont have to be morally right for you to like them as characters!

and its totally ok to like the cogs more than toons. it doesnt mean you support their takeover of the land lol. you can enjoy characters while acknowledging their actions are bad. i personally cannot get too invested in the toons myself, but i can acknowledge their land is being colonized and they are right to fight back. just bc the cogs are your blorbos doesnt mean they dont deserve the comeuppance theyre getting. misty had that piano coming, even if her intentions approaching barnacle bessie werent malicious

[ruvigapo]

Hey this is so niche but i did a pentagon based design of the xhorhaus and i low key would pay cr to use a design like this for the animated show bc it is just So Neat i Love shapes ♡♡♡♡♡

(Btw please do immagine that veth and yeza have a ladder down into the laboratory)

[off-the-rails-raccoon]

Did you like the new ending :3 (fuck the old one)

I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!!!! It's the best logical way the dsmp could've ended AND because it's so open-ended, it leaves a lot of room for the fandom to build on, which isn't something you see a lot in media nowadays.

HOWEVER, it has been really bothering me these past few days since it was released, and I've had complex feelings about it that I haven't really been able to figure out until somewhat recently. Though, this is probably just me lol!

I'm gonna try to make this as short and legible as I can, but as you know I'm so very bad at that so sorry in advance.

Dsmp has been my main source of entertainment and an escape from just life in general since I first started getting into it—which was back in mid-2020 or so, but that was less of dsmp itself and more of the fandom. Though I still really enjoy the content creators content itself, I've watched them less and less and on the occasion that I see a clip or quote by them (especially Tommy) it's SO jarring how much they've changed and matured, and it's only a reminder of how I've done the same. That's the feeling I got when seeing the new lore. Everything has changed, people have matured, relationships have drifted apart, and we are living in the present.

It's like the feeling of finding an old toy that you distinctly remember loving so very much way back then and realizing you feel indifferent to it now. You've changed, your taste of things you enjoy changed, your relationships with people have changed, and you've grown.

I don't want to go back but I don't want to stop reminiscing, and this ending has made me realize that.

[bacchuschucklefuck]

My Accolades

[artsycooky13]

top 3 fave bbys in the burrito show (bonus SUPER LONG tags on how i feel bout the characters)

[good-beansdraws]

If you sin, you need to do more than be atoned...

Wanted the counterpart to this art (though I didn't feel like drawing two sets of armor so it's just Amane LOL -- I promise they're still a team!)

[thehumanbeans]

goyim look up what zionism means challenge level: impossible

[jinxed-ninjago]

Shade is voiced by Andrew Francis and honestly it's pretty clear after looking it up because how Andrew Francis voices Shade and how Andrew Francis voices Cole sound incredibly similar. Shade's voice is just more raspy and the tiniest bit deeper I guess? Regardless they sound very similar

[gorespawn]

also while we're here i would like to share the two iterations of tumblr user gorespawn that have existed since i abandoned this blog back in like early 2021. Who wants me

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

YOU GUYS-

[shimadadoctor]

TONS OF RANDOM CURIOUS CAT REQUESTS :> OH YEAH AND

FURRY PB DOODLE I MADE FOR UHHH IDK I WAS BORED

[dizquized]

FOR YOUR OWN SANITY, do not look in the tags, dont do it. its not worth it. a demon possessed me or something, i dont know.

[tomwaterbabies]

in other news im finally doing some studies of Steampunk Bikes And Engines so i can later design my idea for hugo's special little bike