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pochx · 2 years

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this is. whiny baby moments. and uh yeah.

yknow realistically getting distracted by relearning how to do a readmore on mobile helped me not need to vent post.

i will say tho for the sake of it that idg why my therapist wants me to make new relationships when i cant even be normal or stable w the ones i currently have. like sir that aint gonna correct or change my issue here.

also the gist of my sadness tn was that i'm very bad at expressing needs bc i become this needy mess but also each time i try ppl say "well. i can't/won't do that" and its like damn okay i guess thats a valid point. anw wish i could be coherent enough for ppl to understand.

ok actual crybaby moments but its like almost 1 am so please forgive me.

anw i think i could not exist and everything would be fine. idt i'm special or important or even worth it. there will always be someone better. "but they wont be u" i think u could find a million ppl like me actually. kinda barely funny. polite bc they have issues. not a whole lot of positive qualities. u know.

like i'm here and alive bc i was born. i cannot hurt myself and i never will--which imo is like wow pathetic much when im super mentally ill abt it--but. nothing would be different if i werent here. a comfort as well as injury to know that.

ok if like someone brings 5-10% of smth to ur life. i only ever bring 0.2% of that at best. negligible.

anw its the late night speaking. even if i believe this to be true it doesnt matter. i'm still here in my little clown outfit even if i'm not of value or important and barely a dent in ppls lives. i still have to live this life out. there's no choice in the matter

#maybe i should get someone else bc idt we vibe well enough tbh #hm. bed time.#fr tho uh i'm just being a sad sack rn like. i'll be normal again in the morrow or w/e #morrow is that right? idc #it is what it is yknow not much more can be done

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medi-bee · 4 months

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isat pokemon au, my liege?

my rambling in tags

#my art #in stars and time #isat #isat spoilers #pokemon #siffrin #mirabelle #isabeau #odile #bonnie #i am not individually tagging pokemon sorry. floragato eevee ursaring scorbunny meowstic <- for anyone who does not know them #im personally a big fan of when artists mold pokemon designs like clay to fit their characters so i tried to channel that #siffrin really does have the perfect mystery dungeon backstory. washes up on a beach with no memories of their past type of deal yknow #i imagine that he was still a sprigatito then? and evolves at some point during their journey? dont ask me for details i dont know them #veryy tempting to make him an absol but ive already seen that done very well!! so i kept most of these to floragato sif #mirabelle being an eevee is suuuch low hanging fruit sorry. i could not resist the evolving pokemon not wanting to evolve trope #i was concerned that sif was no longer shortest party member until i realized they just stand on their back legs all the time to feel talle #when quadruped like mira he is still shortest. sorry siffrin #isa gave me such a hard time. like i never thought i would turn a character into ursaring of all things but it really was the best choice #my other choices were bewear or pawmot if you care. he’s so bear coded #if going purely based on looks i probably would have made odile a sneasler. but i wanted her to be psychic #ill be honest bonnie was purely vibes. they carry the treasure bag :)#never draw bonnie's hat in profile worst mistake of my life #loop is still cat shaped here but i’ve seen the idea of them changing species thrown around. much to think about #i like the idea of the party seeing sif and loop side by side and immediately clocking their entire deal #the change god is mew btw. very important information to no one but myself #eurasie as hisuian zoroark?? lots of hair. and the king can be darkrai #don’t mind the inconsistencies. me and my 2781 ways of drawing the same character #wait what does an eevee look like again. googles it. oh i really crabbed this one up #uhh. looks around. been sitting on this one for a bit too long i think. maybe ill clean up some more sketches later

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bacchuschucklefuck · 4 months

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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest

#not art #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit #kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it #until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it #until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her #but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs #she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying #probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone #lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear #Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked #but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now #yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc #man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet #and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out #lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help #it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around #but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever #its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous #its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot #yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry #doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it #ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking

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tittysuckersworld · 9 months

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@lotus-pear uhh congrats on 5k!!! this is first time doing a dtiy and am sorta still new to famdom but yee was fun draw(exept the face hand oh gob-) hope have nice day

(also is with fem dazai because...... women<3<3)

#only reason have still gottem these out is because wanted get some more these done before work on promised peices/comissiom-#now am gonna only work on those so see a ranpo guy or gal soon in future and expect a small pause #because next projects i wanna work on are comission above all else and more comic type things or an animatic because love those #yee no clue whats exactly up for me drawing wise next but i know it will probs be a break from brain rot constantly so can work more on #oc comic stuff and working out art work style stuff #also if you noticed the past 3 dazai faces ive drawn are pretty much the same no you havent. i will draw more expresive faces soon i promi-#gonna do face studys soon to figure out style stuffs ya yee #okay enough rambles got off topic heres tags uhhh #lotuspear5kdtiys #my arts<3 #bsd dazai #bsd fanart #bsd #dazai bsd #bungou stray dogs dazai #dazai osamu #fem dazai #wow so much less tags when only one character huh #also lissened to hailey kiyoko wile drawing so. yknow #<3<3<3

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ichorblossoms · 4 months

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lots of respect for ppl who don't post/talk abt certain oc things due to not wanting to spoil their own stuff, however i will not be doing that. by the time any of this stuff is finished it'll probably be different anyways

#i have this thing where i simultaneously cannot ever find the words to articulate my oc stuff and the inability to shut up about it #who the fuck knows if i'll actually finish it. i mean i'd love to. i WANT to but these are (for now) passion projects and i can't devote #myself to them full time so! i'll hand over the details #nothing wrong with not wanting to spoil things either i get it. i jsut talk a lot. esp if i'm excited abt smthin #actually now that i think abt it there are some ttw things i keep close to my chest #partially for spoiler things but also the canon of the story is so wildly different from what it has been that it is the one case where i #don't want to introduce something cool and neat only to have it scrapped later bc this blog is evidence that i have done that. many times #and thinking abt storytelling the way i imagine honeybee being told is nonlinear so at times it necessitates me 'spoiling' things from #p1 and p2 for instance to explain how they got to where they are in p3 #i'm thinking a bit more and with ttw being horror i think the next time i get around to taking a solid jab at it i will actually be more #cagey about certain things. esp in regards to sanguine as a whole #but it's underbaked in the middle rn so. shrugs #i still also don't really mind spoilers in general so i don't give much of a shit abt spoiling my own stuff yknow?#good stories are good regardless of spoilers and my intention is to make good stories. not that i can be the one to judge that tho #but i like what i make and that's the really matters yeeeeeeeehaaaawwwwwww #rambles

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waywardsalt · 3 months

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with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;

a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.

linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.

#phantom hourglass #linebeck #loz #legend of zelda #salty talks #imo the action vs inaction thing feels esp interesting to me when looking at oshus specifically. he and his world are in grave danger #and he knows it and he actively does nothing and even seems reluctant to let ciela and link go ahead and do something.#of course he comes around on it but it's very interesting. has he given up at that point? thats what it suggests to me #that hes like. joined the people of mercay in just lying down and waiting for other people to fix their problems or just. not do anything #otherwise on mercay you have that old guy in the bar who spends the whole game not leaving bc he doesnt want to face his wife #and she never goes to the bar to actually look for him and just talks about it if anything #the guy with the blue tunic talks a lot about linebeck and his ship and almost gives the impression that he really wants to talk to him #but yknow. doesnt. theres the women that tells you about docks being shut down and how linebeck is the only person who's showed up #the woman you see at the broken bridge who's just like oh well! time to wait til someone fixes it.#even the guy fixing the bridge iirc is like well fuck i gotta do it or else oshus is going to bitch at me abt it #everyone seems reluctant to act which makes for an interesting way in how our main crew stands out #it is less so oh theyve been chosen specifically for this its moreso they're the ones who are fucking doing something about this #for their own various reasons some of which are more selfish but theyre still doing something #will likely have more stuff to say when im done but ofc we have other characters in the game who have to do with this #anyways. linebeck is so animated all of the fucking time it's great i dont think theres any other character that moves as much as him #when he's just standing around to talking to link it's great. he's so ready to get going.#it works with him being an anxious mess and also with like. oh he's probably understimulated. you know he's got a nasty case of wanderlust #i can put it with the idea that he's understimulated and afraid to stim in public so he's just constantly moving #he probably drums his fingers on tables bounces his leg when sitting paces around switches the way he sits or lays down often #tbh this kinda fits in with him being one of the main characters who takes action moreso than a lot of other characters #his arc culminates in him taking action he's going after the ghost ship he's moving around the world the only issue is that one of the #actions he takes is running away from his problems literally n metaphorically (tho idk if facing the jolene problem is a good idea for him)

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arolesbianism · 1 month

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Despite how much I suffered making my last isat au Aris sprite redraw, I decided to do it again and once again went through hell doing it. There’s like a billion mistakes in this (such as her having the wrong arm rip) but at the end of the day I’m still happy with how it turned out :]

#keese draws #oc #oc art #eternal gales #isat #in stars and time #sorry for main tagging feel free to excecute me if you want or whatever #grips sink cringe is dead cringe is dead cringe is dead #anyways this is a very fuzzy and vague au as I don’t rly feel comfortable going off too hard with this one #this is pretty much entirely because I know I’d have to fuck around with the worldbuilding a decent amount and I don’t rly wanna do that #Isat’s worldbuilding is one of my favorite parts of isat so I don’t wanna fuck it up yknow?#I might do some other sprite redraws once I stop thinking too hard abt aris and tali #for context tali is the king aka complicated design that makes me wanna cry especially since I made it worse by changing her imagery #instead of having tears as a thing she has like. fracturing if that makes sense?#it’s supposed to be a nod to her ‘cracked’ eye in canon #she also has threads coming from her limbs instead of long hair for similar reasons #also she doesn’t have straight hair so yknow #but yeah for additional context aris and tali are half sisters and they make me go insane #in this au the idea would be that when their grandparents divorced when the two were little tali and their grandma left the island #aris wouldn’t leave until five or so years later when she was around 12 #at which point the island disappeared and all that #the two have mostly completely forgotten about eachother but there still is familiarity between them #tali isn’t any less of a piece of shit than the king in this au tho #aris for a brief moment almost remembers who tali is during act 3 but she dies before she can fully grasp it #which almost hurts more to her despite not even knowing what she was trying to recall #during act 5 her inner sadness fight is against the hazy image of a very young tali 👍#just tiny 5 year old tali using the voices of the others to scream at aris that she’s been nothing but a burden to them all #and that she’s done nothing but hurt them in her selfish attempts to fix a problem that she refuses to admit she caused #and that time and time again she’s lied that she’s doing her best to protect them and that she’s failed all of them #it’s a mix of current guilt and her hazy but longstanding guilt towards tali

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yesokayiknow · 9 months

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rewatching the wedding of river song just for those five minutes of all three ponds sitting down at home and talking ;-;

#also for amy killing kovarian ❤️#we were robbed! robbed i tell ya!#do you know what i would've done for more domestic scenes of them. do you know who i would've killed #they barely got to interact as a family! and it was always in the context of talking abt the doctor!!!! god.#i've been feeling a lot abt the ponds recently #i mean i always am but yknow #i watched the s5 angel 2 parter the other day #and river is CONSTANTLY checking up on amy throughout it. always asking how she is. the only times she looks scared is when amy's in danger #she loves her parents so much and can barely ever express it. god #mini ep where martha & river meet and talk about how shit the universe treats them dsakjdsakjl #also amy being like oh god i killed a person. what does that make me. to her former assassin daughter is always so so funny #it makes you based amy. next question #doctor who

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luck-of-the-drawings · 2 years

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THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN (TO GET SPLATTERED) OOH MYSTERY! PANIC! DRAMA! EMOTIONS!! LOTS N LOTS OF MEAT, SCARES, AND DICK-OUT FUN! BLOOD IN THE BAYOU HAS GOT IT ALL BABY!!!

blood in the bayou would make SUUUCh a great campy horror movie, its real in my heart, so real.....

#jrwi bitb #jrwi bitb spoilers #jrwi fanart #cw blood #cw gore #cw body horror #EHEHEE YKNOW WHAT I LOVE ABT POSTING ART ON TUMBLR....#I GET TO TAAALK N TALK N TALK YIPPEEE I LOVE TALKIN ABOUT MY ART!! espeeecially WHEN I THINK ALOT ABT IT #SO this is older. i actually drew this right around the time episode 2 came out. but i WAS kinda stupid slow about it #SOO its a lil old and i dont remember aaall the immediate feelings i had about this episode #OHH MY GOD THIS WAS THE EP WHERE THEY FOUND OUT WHAT THE MAP LOOKS LIKE RIGHT???#DUDE I REMEMBER BEING SO GENUINELY FUCKIN C A U G H T BY THAT LIKE WHAT??? WHAT??? IT LOOKS LIKE A WHUT??? HUHN???? NHU????????#OOH ohoh okay okay THE BARRIER right. have yall ever seen annihilation? that kickass movie with that weird dimension? just look it up #in the movie theres a Wall that separates them from the fucked up dimension. its glossy and strange just like a bubble. SOUND FAMILIAR HMMM #THATS what i imagine the wall looked like. gotta draw that at somepoint. i also used that texture for the background color. do ya see it?#i remember when i was first watching it. i thought that maybe it was actually worse outside #like they finally get past the barrier and its the same everywhere else. like the entire earth is already taken.sighh....#CAN I JUST SAY I LOVE KIAN STONE BTW. AINT NO ONE ELSE HAD THER DICK OUT AS MUCH AS THIS KING. HONESTLY IM A KIAN APOLOGIST #KIAN STONE HAS DONE NOTHING WRONG EVER. HE FOLLOWS HIS HEART AND THE MUSIC DUUUDEE!!!!! HIS HEART AND THE MUSIC ARE ONE DUUUUDEEE!!!!#ILL HAVE MORE THINGS TO SCREAM ABT KIAN WHEN I POST MY EP 3 DOODLE PAGE. OKAY. IM NOT SOBBING LOUDLY. I LOVE N SUPPORT KIAN #AND RAAAND oh raaaand he loves his momma.... n his momma loves him.... hes suuuuch a sad lil disaster of a man....#i wanna nurse him back to health like an injured little animal #wtf who said that #anyway ROLAN MY SMARTEST BOY IN THE WORLD #I remember listening to the first episode (right at midnight as i was sleeping) n thinkin #dawww rolans so baby :)) hes so baby girl n small and pathetic #and then i saw the official art of him n im like NO WAY #HE LOOKS WAY TOO COOL IN THAT how could this little man ever be that cool AND BOOY DOES IT PROVE ME WRONG. HOLY SHIT. ROLAN. BEAST OF A MAN #OKAAYAY teehee ill share more thoughts later. if u read this far tell me ALL ur thoughts abt bitb ep 2 #kk bye guys ill see u within the next rotatiion mwah mwah love u guys baaaiiiii. please survive for me.

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brinnanza · 4 months

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the fact that the genetic lottery rolled sensory processing issues severe enough that just regular chilling hanging out existing in my physical human body can be so overwhelming I am too exhausted to do basic tasks is a real fuckin snake eyes situation there is a lot about autism that I truly love and am genuinely grateful for but ripping all the labels off the sensory knobs and givin em a random spin is not fucking one of them

#my number one problem is that I don't know what most people experience yknow #like I have nothing to compare my experiences to sometimes #this is probably why people have therapists huh someone to check your math #shit that actually does sound appealing it's just so much work to find someone whose math I can trust #cause I'm not interested in being more paletable I just want to be more comfortable #I simply need more data ykwim #man I shoulda stuck with psychology I could be doing some dope studies #instead I have to worry about capitalism and rent and buying groceries #which is really cutting into my human behavior data collection time #you'd think they could be done simultaneously but unfortunately I cannot participate and observe

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pikachu-deluxe · 2 months

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got like 1200 ish lines of code for a thing in like 2 hours yippeee

it's a thing to make it easier to modify stuff for mario kart 64 it'll make my life 1000x easier i just have to enter a few numbers in and out comes a file i can apply to the game with some other program instead of having to copy and paste stuff for like half an hour to an hour every time i want to make changes

a game changer you could say *gets dragged away by the neck like a cat*

#listen this is such a big deal to me #and only me bc i'm the only person in the world who cares about doing this very very specific thing for a very specific game #now after this is done i can get my changes to the game ready in like an hour at most depending on what i want to change #instead of a few hours #if i just wanna change stats and not characters that means i just open the program and put in the numbers then have the game ready in like #5 minutes #massive improvement #but yknow if i want to change the characters too then it's still gonna take a bit #like 30 minutes to an hour but still a massive improvement #anyways yeah you can probably tell i'm excited about this #once this is done i'll maybe start working on getting the proper graphics update to the game #it's gonna be a rebranding on my mk64 pokemon thing to make it distinct from another thing someone made that was called pokemon kart alread #didn't really care all that much before since i didn't want to make it public or at least not in mk64 circles but i do wanna share it more #now that i've put this much work into it #since i'm already using pmd sprites i might as well change it to something related to pmd so i'm gonna have to come up with a title for it #also have some fun character surprises for when i release the new rebranded version #since last time i showed it here there have also been a lot of new pokemon added but i have some i haven't shown yet to anyone #not even in the places i playtest with others (if you see this mo hi i have some more i haven't shown off ;3)#but it might be a while before i get that to a public release #we'll see #depends on how i feel about working on it these next few days #so it's gonna be a surprise release

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maraschinotopped · 2 years

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minecraft 👍

#[cherry on top]#recently ive been watching this yter called the librarian do a minecraft letsplay while doing art schoolwork #cuz i like having stuff in the bg to listen to #and its pretty nice :)#very nice voice and also due to how the commentary is done i dont actually have to look at the video itself much #to understand whats going on #also the minecraft world itself is running on a mod called 'from the fog' which basically just adds herobrine back into the game #but not like. in a really obvious way #more like 'you see him in the corners of your vision /sometimes/ and hes not really in the way #but hes there for long enough that its unnerving' kinda way #yknow. so it adds that new element in as well #anyways. fun watch. all of the videos so far are an hour long each but its entertaining enough so i can sit through the whole thing ^.^

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jonny-b-meowborn · 1 year

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Okay I've been thinking about the lil cute therian fic I've been writing, and I think I know how I wanna end it and it's like. Very much self indulgent not really accurate to the mechanisms canon and way too cute but the thing is I can do whatever I want forever so I think Im gonna do it (I'm only like idk 1/3 done tho so don't get too excited fjdnfjndn)

#okay like im gonna spoil it in tags #this is my warning there will be nothing else in the tags #so basically in the fic youre a dog that got kidnapped by the mechs with a bunch of your coworkers #a heist just for fun and to kill some random people out of boredom #but you survive on the ship bc you hide #but then Tim finds you and at first jonny tells him to kill you like the rest #but tim is like. hold on. that person is not a human i dont think. i don't wanna kill an animal #and jonny is like this is stupid. but whatever. were gonna put it back on earth were not keeping it timothy #and thats pretty much all i have for now #but then you just kinda. hang around on the aurora while youre going back to earth and you meet a few of the other mechs #they all have different reactions to you but in the end everyone somewhat accepts that youre a dog #and i wasnt sure how to end it #one option was to just go back home and be done with this silly little adventure and go back to living a normal life as a person #but youre happy you finally met some people that accept you for what you are even if for a moment #the other option would be to stay on the ship kind of as a pet #but that felt a bit off to me because youre not a literal dog youre a human that is a dog yknow. and that feels a bit too. idk weird #but i think i got the solution #what if. you get mechanized #and your human body is replaced with an anthro dog. so you can still be a thinking person you were but with a body that makes sense #like kind of like a permanent fursuit but more metal #and yeah that doesnt make much sense in the mechs canon like thats too nice of them and ill have to think of a good reason for that #but wouldnt that be just. so cute #like thats honestly the dream #i love robots and i am a dog so. if i could get mechanized to be a steel furry id agree right away like not even think about it #kind of like in that one love robots and death episodes with the kitsune #that scene where she transforms into a robot fox is my favorite in the whole ep i think and it honestly gives me species euphoria #so yeah i think im gonna ignore canon for that one but and give the reader/mc a sweet happy ending #and now youre a doggy pirate in space surrounded by people who are okay with that!!! isnt that the best #therian #bee buzz

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ninjagotohell · 4 months

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I just read a whole wacky thread of people arguing which parent was bad Garmadon or Misako and I’m no longer scared of the Misako defenders

#shoutout to the one person who was going on about how garmadon was bad for LETTING LLOYD GET DRAFTED??? HUH???#they had a whole bunch of essays about that and everyone just had to ignore it cuz wtf were they on about #their argument kind of just turned into Everyone Is Bad Cuz They Let Lloyd Be A Ninja #and like. sure? but that’s just (LIKE THEY LITERALLY SAID) bc of the writers not realizing the implications. so it’s irrelevant #cuz it applies to EVERYONE man so WHY ARE WE DISCUSSING THIS. also why point to GARMADON do u think he WANTED LLOYD TO BE THE GREEN NINJA #WAS THAT NOT LIKE. HIS ENTIRE GOAL. TO MAKE HIM NOT THE GREEN NINJA. applies to Misako too actually #my point is it was SO IRRELEVANT LOL #oh yeah but um the actual post. uh. yeah the ppl defending Misako were literally making stuff up and refusing to fact check #like listen I hella respect if you want to make ur little headcanons that justify her actions a bit more but you CANNOT be treating them as #fact like you literally made that up 😭#it wouldn’t be as bad if they weren’t also making stuff up to make Garmadon look WORSE. like wtf. they were straight up contradicting canon #to say that Garmadon didn’t care or whatever and never even tried to be there for Lloyd LIIIKE #honestly my biggest damning reason I don’t like Misako is honestly the fact that we meet her GIVING A TOUR. THAT IS NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN #UR SON. like sure research prophecy or whatever SHE CLEARLY IS DONE WITH THAT AND IS JUST CHILLIN AT THE MUSEUM LIKE WHATTT #it’s like ‘oh she’s on break’ or ‘oh she’s just earning some money yknow ppl need that’ BUT LIKE. UR TELLING ME SHE HAS FREE TIME OUTSIDE OF #RESEARCH AND SHE CANT SPEND EVEN A MINUTE TO REACH OUT TO HER SON????#a lot of the arguments I saw acted like she couldn’t spare a single moment for Lloyd otherwise it gets in the way of her research when #CLEARLY SHE CAN. bro was CASUALLY STROLLING ALONG THE MUSEUM and just goes ‘oh hey abandoned son’ LIKEEE #Misako could’ve been a better character if the writers like. thought about things a LITTLE MORE. and gave her some depth.#and YOU CAN HEADCANON AS MUCH DEPTH AS YOU WANT ONTO HER. THATS COOL. BUT ITS NOT REAL.#I just think Misako defenders should be less ‘free my girl she did none of that’ and more ‘free my girl she did all that but the writers #didn’t know what they were doing’#like Misako has great potential but they fumbled. rip.

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sho-haizono · 6 months

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YAYYY MISHA THEME!!!

MISHA 💖💓🩷❤️💕💖💓🩷💖❤️💖💓💓💖🩷💓

#i loevev them so much did you know that #currently saving up for him and it is HELL after spending it all on sparkel .so many quests and not enough timw .........#and . ouhhh havent had the chance to talk abt . shit what is it called . lemme go see real quick .#A CHILDS DREAM . yknow that one map with the text on the walls and the melted clocks and stuff .#that was done . SO incredibly well it makes me INSANE...........#so like . im 100.1% sure the speaker (who talks abt mikhail a lot) in that room is misha.#like that IS her voice right . im not going insane #its just . auuh... the dreams (or at least golden hour) in peacony are so childlike .... like . some of the puzzles are jigsaw puzzle ;#turn into a small cartoon character ; and help the cartoon character find his cartoon gears .#and then you get to clockie . who can only be seen by someone w a childs innoence (or smth around those lines)#and that misha can see clockie . which like . cool right ? yeab. UNTIL YOU GET TO A CHILDS DREAM ..#where theres something just ... sososo off .#and its ... its just gotta be misha . its gotta be . idk if theres anything outside of main story im missing (there probably is)#BUT . augh . auf even .#childs dream still has these childlike qualities to it (the paper birds; walking on walls) but just ... more warped #(the general atmosphere of the place; the monsters even .)#the music having a music box to make the tone of the song more distressing ... how its so much more smaller than golden hour ..#aughhhhhh ... its just such a good parallel..... i could talk abt it all day really .#anyways . i WAS going to tell u abt my misha theory (which may or may not be confirmed) bu t i got DISTRACTED.#uhh anyways . my theory is that misha is somehow trapped in peacony .#when misha goes onto the parlor car they mention that theyve never been outside of peacony before and that she can t stay for long .#which i imagine is very normal! BUT its this combined w her lock motif (pupils; most of the doors in childs dream) thag make me suspicious #i mentioned before that golden hour has a very childish quality to it. and that misha has that childish quality.#okay well . what if mishas being kept there so that golden hour can keep on being a dream for other people?#and so that would make golden hour mishas dream. (or part of his dream? could be more people the familys keeping)#and that would imply that childs dream is . well . mishas nightmare .#uhm . i think thats it ..? if i come up w anything else ill . ramble abt it somewhere . definitely not the most eloquent but #i hope i got the point across <33 #i think its an understatement to say i love misha . i LOVE MISHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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skrunksthatwunk · 5 months

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found out that rascal's owner took him again while i was out, and he's probably not gonna be back since the semester's almost over. i don't even know if his owner's coming back next semester, if i'll ever see him again. if he'll ever see me again. why do they wait until im not around to do this? why do they never let me say goodbye to him?

#i didnt really get to process it bc i found out when i was hanging w a friend but. im processing it now #sigh.. i dont know. i dont know.#at the end of the day he is and has always been someone else's cat. i can't control what she does with him #no matter what i think of it. she can always take him away. but every time it happens im just. im tired yknow?#it's worth it to me to have him around. i love him dearly and i want him to be in a home where he's actually cared for (which i have done my #best to provide) but he's just. not mine. and every time it happens i back up and think man. im such a sucker.#i don't think people manipulate me often. not in an ongoing way i mean. i don't think ppl see me as valuable enough to most of the time.#but damn. she really found my weak spots didn't she. free petcare courtesy of one chump who can't live without animals around. sigh #he deserves stability but he deserves love more. this weird shared custody thing is better for him i think. and frankly i also love him.#im not the priority here but my feelings are like. there. him being taken away without even telling me first hurts. i'd like to be able to #say goodbye to him. im not saying he has to stay or this has to go on but couldn't they just.. consider my feelings a bit more?#just bc you're fine with dropping your cat off somewhere for weeks not knowing when you'll see him again and not visiting doesn't mean i am #and i kind of feel like my roommate is part of this. after all it's not like his owner can just break into our room and take him #and if im always out when they do it there's a chance roomie's just shipping him off whenever she gets sick of him.#she's done it before. even after she agreed so vehemently with me about never wanting him to go back to such treatment and stuff early on.#she's been spraying him for little reason lately too. and i mean i get being a little more cautious with some things bc her neck's broken #but she's really fixated on how much he smells and bites and stuff and talks about how if i wasn't around she'd consider eating him #and then other times she's like that's my pookie. i don't get it. like yeah i tell rascal to fuck off sometimes bc he hurts me but it's not #like a hateful thing. i dont resent him for it i'm just annoyed sometimes bc he's maiming me a little. he's my baby. how could i loathe him?#so it makes me think that roomie might be blaming his transfers on his owner bc she doesn't want me to judge her #and like. this is her room too. it's not her fault she's more bothered by the smell than me. if she doesn't want to be bitten and clawed all #the time i can sympathize. i don't wanna force her to house him. but i wish she'd just be honest with me i guess #like. what if his owner decides to give him away without telling me? i'd take him in in a heartbeat. even though i know it's a bad idea.#but i'm worried he'll fall out of my reach completely. and at the very least I'd like to be able to say goodbye first. that's all.

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