#it doesnt matter that shes a little (a lot) different | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

trivia-yandere · 1 year ago

Note

omg i really enjoyed nefarious! 😭 jk was so yandere but i loved it! can i request another jk yandere with him wondering why the reader doesnt really like him as much? Thank u if you do!

hello! yes we can! (since you didn't really go into detail, we'll just come up with anything that seems to fit the "yandere" aspect)

this fic is a little (a lot) different than what we usually write in terms of smut - so warnings are of course applied!

the other woman

jungkook decides it's time to take matters into his own hands and figure out how to get you - his sweet, innocent girlfriend, to fuck him.

@sweetempathprunetree @momnomnom @darkuni63

writer: quay

word count: 3.989

warning: yandere/dark themes, non-con aphrodisiac intact, threesome, girl on girl, fingering, oral (m/f receiving), nipple sucking, kissing, jealousy, attempted blackmail, spitting, loss of virginity, scissoring, character death, manipulation,

“An aphrodisiac…?” Jungkook murmurs, a tilt of his head. “Are you sure?”

Mina, your friend, nods with a wide smile. “Y/N’s a little shy, you know? Maybe something like that could help her loosen up.”

Jungkook swallows, he isn’t sure himself. However, Mina was your friend - your best friend and someone you trusted with your life.

Mina was the reason Jungkook and you met. Mina was someone Jungkook met through mutual friends that oftentimes mingled. The many times he met Mina, he has never seen you all but once - and one time was enough.

You stood out in the loud club, nearly clenching onto Mina like a scared puppy. You were dressed similar to her - tight dress that stopped just below your ass, heels that strapped up to your calves and light makeup. Only, you didn’t appear to be comfortable in what you were wearing like Mina.

Mina had introduced Jungkook to you after noticing the man was lingering. His eyes flickered to you every so often to catch your gaze - he never did. That’s when Mina had nearly pushed you into him, declaring that Jungkook - who she only knew through friends of friends and not personally - was an amazing person to talk to. In hindsight, Mina wanted to party and needed a reason to not have you clenching onto her the entirety of the night,

But Jungkook thanks Mina for allowing him to get to know you. You were closed off, only speaking when spoken to and could never hold his gaze for longer than three seconds. But Jungkook wasn’t phased - he wanted to know you more.

Months of pining and you finally agreed to a date with him. More months of dates and you finally agreed to be his girlfriend.

Now after a year since he first met you, Jungkook notes that you aren’t necessarily a touchy person. You would hug him and hold his hand. You would kiss him when he initiated it - but when it came to sex, you completely shut down. Jungkook was a man, yes, but not an asshole. He wouldn’t force you into anything you weren’t comfortable doing. He loved you enough to wait for when you were ready.

However, it never appeared to be a time you would be. Jungkook enjoyed the steamy makeout sessions - holding you down beneath him, rubbing his clothed cock against you while you were a moaning mess. But how long could he possibly wait when the sounds of your moans were so beautiful? Your skin so soft and your natural scent clogged his nostrils? He wanted nothing more than to have you as his in every way you’d allow him to.

That’s where Mina came in. Mina knew just how innocent and shy you were and she would find him a way to make you feel comfortable.

Jungkook wasn’t expecting an aphrodisiac to be one of them. But Mina was your friend and maybe, just maybe, this is the push you needed. Something to get you aroused enough that you would know he meant no harm when it comes to pleasuring you. Hell - if you would just open your legs and allow Jungkook to taste you, it would be enough for him (for now).

“How about we try tonight?” Mina suggests. “I know you guys have movie nights on Wednesdays.”

Jungkook nods. The both of you were off the following day and that meant that there was no specific time to end it. It was one of Jungkook’s favorite hangouts with you, as cheesy as it was.

“Okay, good.” Mina clicks her tongue. “I’ll come over uninvited,” Mina raises her left hand and does finger quotations. “and that’s when I’ll bring the pill.”

Jungkook swallows. He’s uncertain still but nods nonetheless.

Mina is your best friend and Jungkook could trust her - right?

“You don’t have to drink anymore, Y/N.” Jungkook assures, eyes darting to Mina who rolls her eyes.

“It’s supposed to be a fun night, right, Y/N? Don’t you feel like you’re having fun?”

You nod your head slightly at Mina. You glance at a worried Jungkook and ponder what in the world was going on between the two. Jungkook appeared worried and bothered by something while Mina - typical - had her nonchalant attitude.

“Just one more shot and we’ll go back to the movie, yea?” Mina nods and places a shot into your hands. She told Jungkook that she was going to crush the pill into one of your drinks - this being an alcoholic beverage worries him even more. But Mina assured that everything would be alright.

The shot burns your throat but you manage to not gag. Like promised, the three of you return back to the movie - not something neither you or Jungkook picked. Jungkook tended to go for superhero movies while you stuck to either comedy or the occasional thriller depending on your mood.

Mina chose a comedy - full of sexual acts. She had laid on the other side of your couch while you and Jungkook sat on the opposite end. Her eyes were fixed on the television, possibly working off the amount of alcohol she drank for the little amount of time she’s been here.

Jungkook doesn’t make his move until he notices your legs clench together. The aphrodisiac was working in full effect.

Jungkook doesn’t dive right in. He begins with light touches. His thumb strokes your hand and then he brings it to his lips and places a kiss upon it. He wraps an arm around your shoulders to bring you close to him and he’s kissing your head gently.

Jungkook feels accomplished when you don’t stiffen at his touch. A hand grips your thigh as his lips are kissing upon your neck.

“J-Jungkook.” your stutter causes Jungkook to groan and now bite your neck harshly. You yelp at the sudden action and now Jungkook’s hand dives between your legs fully. You were wearing the shorts you’d usually wear to sleep in - loose fitting that gave easy access.

“Yes, baby?” Jungkook’s tongue licks your neck as his fingers toy with your clothed clit. He senses that you want to shut down and turn away, but the pleasure is consuming you.

“I don’t feel…like myself.” you murmur to him, but Jungkook notes that you’re leaning upon him for easier access. “I feel different.”

Jungkook hums, his warm breath tickling your skin that causes goosebumps to litter throughout you. You shiver, unsure of what in the world was happening to you - and why you weren’t cowering away like you usually did when it came to Jungkook’s advances.

“Do you feel good?” Jungkook asks, his fingers tapping your heat teasingly. Hesitantly, you nod, and Jungkook hums. “Then everything is alright.”

Jungkook plays with the hem of your shorts, finding his way inside of them. You stiffen, breathing hitching. You want to tell him to stop - but there’s no use. Jungkook’s already pushing your panties aside and touching your clit - you’re embarrassed to have him feel how wet you are.

Your back arches a bit and gently, your eyes close. It felt weird being intimate with Jungkook - you never felt the need to ever go past a makeout session with him. However, it seems as though your body wanted something different.

The movie is nothing but background noise now. You moan - encouraged to do so by Jungkook who is whispering dirty words in your ears. He’s rubbing along onto your clit at a feverish pace that has your legs shaking. His tongue rubs up and down your neck, hell bent on leaving marks to have any and everyone knows that you were his.

“Does it feel good, Y/N?”

Your eyes snap open and in horror, you come face to face with Mina. She’s smiling at you, eyes staring right at your face. You had completely forgotten that she was still in the room - maybe your aroused mind figured (or hoped) that she was asleep.

“It’s okay. You guys don’t have to stop because of me.” Mina assures, flickering her eyes to Jungkook. “I just want to make sure you feel good, right Jungkook?”

Jungkook turns his eyes away from Mina, but nods. He’s unsure what she is doing here now. He no longer needed any assistance from her - he had you where he wanted you. Wet and willing.

“How about I help?” Mina suggests, and before you or Jungkook (especially Jungkook) can protest, Mina is pulling at your tank top. She lifts it over your head, not waiting for your permission. “It’s easier if you get naked.”

Jungkook removes his hands from your shorts and watches intently. He was curious - he was your boyfriend yes, but still a man. Sometimes a little girl on girl did turn him on - and he was interested in seeing how far you’d let Mina go.

Mina had you naked - that’s how far she went. You feel under pressure beneath Jungkook’s hungry gaze and Mina’s. The cool air tickles your shivering skin.

“Why do you look so scared?” Mina giggles and comes closer. “Here,” she lifts her own shirt from her body and hurls it across the living room. She’s left in a lacy red bra that doesn’t remain on. She hurls it in the direction of her shirt. “now we’re both exposed.”

Jungkook watches as your eyes widen at Mina’s exposed state. You lick your lips, legs clenching.

“You trust me, right, Y/N?” Mina murmurs, crawling towards you. “We’re best friends.”

You nod.

Mina smiles. Her hand places itself on both sides of your face and she kisses your lips.

Jungkook’s wearing basketball shorts, but even they feel tight. But how couldn’t they be? You are completely naked while Mina is from the top up. You and her are both breast to breast while kissing. You’re stiff and awkward at first, but soon melt into the kiss.

Mina sucks onto your tongue, hands roaming your body. She touches your thighs, rubbing up along your hips to your ribs until she reaches your breast. She squeezes them into her palms and giggles when you moan against her lips.

“Have you ever let Jungkook suck them?” Mina murmurs. Her fingers are twisting your nipples gently and you shake your head, growing hot with each passing second. “Come Jungkook. Don’t let me steal all the fun.”

Mina turns you away from her and towards Jungkook. His eyes are dark and full of lust as he comes closer. The tent in his shorts don’t go unnoticed and without a warning, his lips are on your breast. Mina allows you to lay against her as Jungkook’s tongue swirls onto your nipples.

“Does it feel good?” Mina asks and when you nod, she coos at your cuteness.

Jungkook suckles and kneed onto your breast as if his life depended on it. He was sure that if this is the farthest you’d be willing to go, that it’d be okay because he had the chance to taste a part of you he never had before.

You’re leaking onto Jungkook’s couch, but neither you, Jungkook or Mina appeared to care. While Jungkook sucks on your breast, Mina’s hands are rubbing along your skin. She’s gentle and soothing, as if couching you through your intimacy. Her hands reach lower and lower, lips kissing the nape of your neck gently.

“You’re wet, Y/N.” she murmurs against your skin. Her fingers are sliding along your clit, rubbing in an antagonizing slow motion. You gasp, legs widening as she continues. You were being overstimulated - never having two people dote on you at once on such sensitive areas of your body.

“We need to pleasure Jungkook now.”

Upon hearing his name, Jungkook glances upwards. His tongue flickers onto your nipple slowly as he listens to Mina speak.

“Have you ever given him a blow job?”

Mina knows the answer, but she has to be slow with you. You were a virgin, after all. Far too scared to give yourself to anyone and as your best friend, she’d help you through it. Sure it was taboo - but what were friends for?

“Sit back, Jungkook.” Mina says, and with a pop of your nipple from his lips, Jungkook sits back against the head of the couch eagerly. “Y/N, crawl towards Jungkook.”

Jungkook’s breath hitched at the sight of you. You were so obedient and cute. You sit between his legs, hot with embarrassment. Your ass arched in the air and he finds it hard where to set his eyes.

“Touch him. Take his cock out.” Mina giggles again.

With shaky hands, you do as you’re told. You never touched Jungkook like this before and the intimacy is all too foreign to you.

Jungkook licks his lips when you take his cock out. Your hands are soft and your grip is firm, but he can still sense your hesitation. It’s long and girthy, veins pulsing with a tip that reminds you of a lollipop - so flush and red.

Mina wraps her hand around yours. She guides you through it. She tightens your grip over his cock and begins to thrust upwards until you establish it.

Jungkook widens his legs with a deep moan. His head pushes back against his couch cushions.

“Spit on the tip.”

You yelp, taken aback by her request. But Jungkook doesn’t go to protest Mina’s words. You do as you’re told, the salvia sliding down the base of length.

Now pump him a little faster.

Mina encourages you to do so, hand gently rubbing your ass. You do as you’re told once more, eyes widen with fascination that Jungkook was a stuttering and moaning mess beneath you.

“Okay, now bring him into your mouth and begin to suck.” Mina murmurs behind you. Her hands were beginning to roam between your legs once more, two of her fingers rubbing your clit. “Start with the tip first until you get comfortable. Work your way down so you can take him fully.”

Jungkook feels his toes curling at the sensation of your wet and warm mouth. You do exactly as Mina says and twirl your tongue onto the base of his cock. It’s salty due to the pre-cum, but you find yourself actually enjoying this part.

You jump upon feeling a sensation between your legs. Mina’s tongue laps between your folds, causing your thighs to shake. You were new to this, so any form of intimacy was mind-blowing.

Jungkook’s breathing heavy, moaning loudly when you attempt to take him entirely into your mouth. You bob your head just as his eyes flicker open to watch you - your eyes are filled with lust just as his ares and he knows the aphrodisiac is working wonders. His eyes catch Mina behind you and he knows that he won’t last long at the sight of both of you.

“I’m gonna cum, baby.” Jungkook pants, hand grasping your head to push you down onto his cock. You gag, tears pricking the corners of your eyes at his sudden thrusts.

Mina makes it her mission to assure that you cum along with Jungkook. She suckles onto your wet clit feverishly, head bobbing side to side while her tongue remains flat against it. Her free hands rub your ass to encourage you to do so.

Your thighs shake and you feel yourself coming undone, abdomen churning with an unfamiliar feeling.

Your moaning sends Jungkook over the edge, your throat vibrating aggressively - Mina was making you cum and in return, you were doing the same.

Jungkook pulls out of your mouth to allow you to breathe. He wasn’t going to cum like this - no, it needed to be inside of you. He waited this long. You were nearly dripping all over Mina’s face and that should be him, but he wouldn’t complain.

“Are you ready to fuck her?” Mina asks, lifting herself from between your legs.

Jungkook nods hastily.

Mina smiles and quickly, she pulls you back against her once more. “Open your legs, Y/N. Don’t be scared.”

Mina holds both of your legs apart and Jungkook swears that he could die with the sight of you. You’re so wet - dripping - and inviting. Your walls clench around nothing and though your eyes are frightened, there’s still a tint of lust laced in them.

“Come on Jungkook. It’s okay.” Mina encourages.

Mina lowers herself to look at you. She kisses your lips just as Jungkook begins to enter you. Your breathing hitches, but Mina doesn’t let go of your lips. You were a virgin and eventually needed to get over this. Jungkook was the perfect person to do this with. He was your boyfriend and seemingly loved you. He waited for you patiently, after all.

“I-It’s too much.” you murmur to Mina, but she shushes you.

“She can take it, Jungkook.” Mina says to him and your eyes widen. Mina’s head was blocking Jungnkook’s view of your eyes, so he cannot see the frightened expression.

Jungkook’s pace quickens, thrusting deeply inside of you. Your eyes snap shut and when you’re about to scream at the pain, Mina places her lips upon you once more.

Your walls feel so heavenly around Jungkook that he doesn’t want to stop. You felt wonderful, just how he knew you would. So tight and warm - pussy made just for him.

Mina places her fingers upon your clit and rubs, attempting to calm you down and add your own pleasure while you are dealing with being stretched out.

“Doesn’t it feel good, Y/N?” Mina says. It’s been five minutes of nonstop thrusting. Your thighs were being clenched by Jungkook’s embrace, surely leaving a mark. The sound of skin slapping echoes off of his living room walls, the credits of the movie now rolling in the background.

Your eyes open only slightly. Mina’s finger quickens and you moan in response. The overstimulation has you cumming quickly, juices flowing out to coat Jungkook’s abdomen.

“She loves your cock, Jungkook!” Mina cackles, leaning back to finally have Jungkook see just how fucked out you were. Your eyes were unfocused and you laid limp upon Mina. She offers Jungkook an encouraging smile. “Cum inside of her like you wanted.”

Jungkook grunts. He leans down and places his forehead against yours, lips catching your own in a quick peck. “I love you so much, Y/N.” he whispers, thrust going sloppy as he was about to cum soon. He was overwhelmed with emotion - he finally had you wrapped around him. You and he were perfect for one another - you fit together like a perfect puzzle piece.

Jungkook cums deep inside of you, twitching and panting. He litters kisses against your face and remains still until he goes flaccid.

“I think you should start a shower.” Mina says after a moment. “You and her should get cleaned.”

Jungkook nods. He kisses your lips once more before removing himself from the top of you.

“I’ll tell Y/N you drugged her.” Mina leans against the bathroom door with crossed arms. “Isn’t that…rape then?”

Jungkook swallows thickly. “It was your idea.” he hisses to Mina.

“Yeah.” Mina laughs. “But who do you think she’d believe? She loves me.”

She loves me.

You loved her - Mina.

Jungkook understood now why you acted the way you have the entirety of the time he knew you. The two of you grew a bond, more of an emotional one. You relied on him with your feelings and vice versa, but you didn’t see him in the way you saw Mina. You loved Mina - saw her as the light of your life and someone you’d do anything for - be anything for.

Jungkook had walked in on the two of you. He felt as if he was intruding in his own home - but you didn’t know he was there. You were wrapped in a hug with Mina, so tightly that Jungkook couldn’t help but feel a jolt in his heart. The moment appeared intimate when the both of you kissed, naked bodies against one another.

Mina had locked eyes with Jungkook when she laid you down, legs wide. She had rubbed her own clit against yours, her eyes never leaving Jungkooks.

Your moans were louder with Mina - you were more vocal. It was as if you forgot he existed all together - that you weren’t in his home.

You touched Mina without having her to tell you. Your hands roamed her body, clenching her breast.

You spoke - and your words were what broke Jungkook.

“I love you, Mina.” you had said.

You never told Jungkook you loved him - not even back to him when he had confessed to you.

“She wouldn’t believe me.” Jungkook murmurs and Mina nods her head with a wide grin.

Mina had followed Jungkook into the restroom once you had come again, this time succumbing to slumber. She had dropped to her knees and prepared herself for him when he pushed her away.

“You had no true intentions of helping me.” Jungkook spits.

“I did.” Mina protests. “And you got what you wanted.”

Jungkook is taken aback by Mina’s tone. “I don’t just want sex with Y/N. I actually love her!” he hisses. He came to Mina for advice, not expecting to hear it. He should have never gone through with the aphrodisiac - what if you regret what happens when it wore off? The thought of him betraying you like this makes his heart hurt.

Jungkook doesn’t want to lose you.

“You could have told me no.” Mina shrugs. Jungkook is in disbelief - she appears as if she doesn’t care. “But you didn’t. That makes you just as fucked up as me.”

Mina comes closer - still naked - and places a hand on his chest.

“I won’t tell Y/N. I just want you to fuck me like you did her.” Mina speaks nonchalantly. “It shouldn’t be-”

Jungkook places both hands on Mina’s neck, her head slamming against the door of his bathroom.

Mina struggles, eyes wide with shock. Jungkook’s grip was tight and she found it hard to breathe.

“J-Jung-K-K-”

Jungkook squeezes harder, eyes hard and determined.

Jungkook loves you. He wasn’t going to allow Mina to ruin what you and he had - he could forgive you. You could grow to love him like he has for you. Once Mina was out the way then there wouldn't be anyone for you to love.

Jungkook was doing this for you. He had to rid your life of such evil. Mina wasn’t a friend to you - you were just a pawn in her game. She wanted him and used you to do so - and he allowed it. He would atone for his sins - but for now, he had to get rid of the biggest sinner there was.

Jungkook drops Mina, lifeless body hitting the ground with a loud thump. He releases a deep sigh. Jungkook had to get rid of Mina - maybe his backyard would have to do. He was planning on renovating the property anyways and adding a deck.

Jungkook shushes you, hand stroking your back soothingly. “It’s nothing you did, Y/N.”

You shake your head, eyes wide with tears. “B-But…”

Jungkook shushes you once more.

It was now the next day and laid beside you was your cell phone, multiple texts from Mina displayed on it.

Mina 🥰: sorry I didn’t stay.

Mina 🥰: i don’t think I can forget what happened. I was drunk.

Mina 🥰: things are…awkward now for me. I’ll be keeping my distance from now on

Mina 🥰: don’t blame yourself. i just need some time to think things through

Jungkook inhales your scent and smiles to himself.

Now he truly had you all to himself, and even if you didn’t love him now then it would be okay. You would grow to love him now that there was no competition in his way. Once you realized that Mina had abandoned you, who else could you possibly run to?

#jungkook x reader #trivia-yandere #bts smut #bangtan smut #btswritingcafe #bangtanwriters net #btswriterscollective #yandere bts #btswritersclub #jungkook smut #bangtanwritershq #jungkook #jungkook yandere #the other woman

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ancientgoddessofegypt · 7 months ago

Text

ASTRO OBSERVATIONS - Sidereal Edition/Natal Placements

Cancer Moons (Ashelashas) - Secret animosity with others. Could have friends that dislike them without knowing. Emotions run high with this group. Asheshla moons tend to get noticed a lot more easily than their mates (other cancer moons). Also have a high sex drive. Could be open to being expressive to others as emotional rollercoasters are often. At some point, the need for secrecy dies out, and the need for community/love care and compassion brings them more nurturance.

Ashelasha moons have 'controlling ancestors'... No better way to put this. They could be open to guiding you but you have to remember its up to you to find your answer this lifetime.

(This reminds me heavily of the mulan movie, especially when she communicates with her ancestors).

Mula (Sagittarius) Moons - Very emotional creatures. Eye opening perspectives. Could of been caged like a bird when younger. Popular energy, could be well known in different spaces. Social media, real life community, in a new community different from their home town etc. Very carefree, loving babes.

Venus in Rohini - Captivating auras, stylish and are confidently bold. Fashionistas. Could really be in the met gala if they wanted lol. Very tasteful when it comes to looks, and personality can be really sensual and sweet. Can be a little heart-throbe. Love to see it.

Shravana Moons - Distance is necessary for needed growth in areas that the mind seeks. What i mean in, travel and connecting to different backgrounds will help you grow culturally and will create great space for your intellect and maturity. With this moon being in capricorn, it helps move out any controlling factors at play. Destiny is connected to the mind and the ethers. So you gotta let go so you can get in control of your circumstances.

Patience, enjoying life as is, and listening to a higher power is what keeps you at balance, and with the ease of flow. k?

Jyesthas - Man.. y'all sex appeal is up there. Doesnt matter if its sun, moon, venus, rising, etc. But its UP. You guys have a 'distance' with the crowd but this is the scorpio nature of you guys. Similar to Shravana Suns/Moons/Venus, you need space so you can get out of the world and into your own mind. Your higher self needs distance so that you can see between the black and white perspectives of life and yourself. You create your own world and thats what makes it special. Your intimate with yourself and the world knows you to be confident, bright and creative however we only see a glimpse of your life through your lens. Its beautiful. Creative life essence is tainted when you allow to many faces and opinions in your work. Do what you want, its your life. Your in control babes.

Posting more soon :)

#astrology theories #astrology thoughts #tropical astrology #astrology observations #spirituality #thoughts #astrology #sidereal astrology #sidereal zodiac #sidereal chart #zodiac

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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months ago

Note

Can we get “calling Hazbin ladies pretty girl”, too, please?

Calling HH gals Pretty Girl

yes you may1!!! WOO YEAH!!! characters: charlie, vaggie, lute, velvette, emily, rosie notes: reader is GN for everyone but vaggie- vaggies reader is fem CWs: none

CHARLIE

very receptive to it and shows how much she enjoys it

she makes sure to tell you in return how pretty she thinks you are, even going as far as to point out what in specific she likes about your looks- though she may go on a little ramble if you let her

she has a noticeable bounce in her step after the interaction and generally seems to be in higher spirits than usual

definitely the type to think about what you said hours later, even as shes trying to go to bed

nearly kicking her feet in the air too/j

VAGGIE

its a little too sweet for her but she still finds the name endearing, you may get a small smile from her

dont let her lack of big reaction make you feel that she didnt appreciate your efforts to flatter her

shes not very obvious or vocal about a lot of her reactions but the subtle shifts in her behavior get it across that you got her feeling a certain way

in a good way, of course

despite that, she turns over what you said in her mind for a few days after the fact

LUTE

very similar to vaggie however shes much less experienced when it comes to affection/romance

for a moment you actually worry you may have offended her in some way before she plainly compliments you back- asides from that at most you may see a faint dusting of pink on her cheeks

theres still passion in her words but its going to take a while for her to become more.. emotive.. at least during any romantic moment

shes so deeply sucked into her work as an angel as well as the whole "keep it pure before marriage" mentality even though what youre doing isnt sinful at all

it lingers in the back of her mind for a while

ROSIE

very receptive although she doesnt let herself get too giddy like charlie and let it get out of hand

will shoot a compliment right back at you, likely turning it into a tease just to get under your skin... if it works shes going to tell you you look cute enough to eat

will lightly pinch your cheek as well

its... very hard to fluster rosie, sure she makes you aware that she appreciates you but you never quite get her to melt at your words and actions

loves your attempts though, finds them delightfully pathetic, in an endearing way!/lh

VELVETTE

shes heard that line before but it feels different coming from you, even if it doesnt evoke many feelings for her

you may get a smirk from her and a light huff before she shoots something right back your way- something far more intense than you had just said

nothing dirty, maybe, but whatever she ends up saying hits you close and makes you feel all flustered

almost takes it as a challenge even if it wasnt intended as one, loves seeing you scramble for words to try to match her energy

EMILY

giddy and excited, she will be smiling about it for a while afterwards- it doesnt matter what shes doing later... she can literally be at some angel meeting and shes still going to be smiling to herself

if the two of you were already cuddling or gently kissing one another shes going to end up peppering kisses all over your face while pointing out that she thinks youre pretty too

her feathers fluff a little too, further showing how much the name effects her.. they even spread a little, though not fully

will think about it for a long while and is not afraid to tell anyone why shes smiling so much

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magicdefendorwolf · 2 years ago

Text

Its the little things

Description:things they do that just melt your heart

Characters:Kafka,Blade,Jing Yuan,Yanqing,Gepard,Serval,Stelle

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Kafka

Despite being a busy woman with lots of things on her mind and shoulders she never seems to forget a single detail about you

She knows you like the back of her hand,she knows when you're stressed,happy,hungry,bored,everything really

And despite coming home tired after a long day she immediately notices your mood,if you're sad or stressed she wastes not time pulling you into her arms to talk about it,no matter how tired she is she will listen to you

Its like she has the perfect memory,she remembers every single detail about you,whether its physical,emotional or in your behaviour

When she sees you're nervous and fidgeting with something she calmly takes your hands into hers,kisses the inside of your palm before saying

"Sweetheart,maybe you should stop letting your body do all the talking and tell me what's wrong will you?"

She would tell you with a warm smile,a genuine one

If you're not ready to talk about it she'll take your mind off of it

And if you wanna talk about it she'll listen no matter what

And nothing will ever stop her from making you her number one priority

And you may not notice that straight away,but with time that becomes crystal clear

Jing Yuan

This dozing general,suddenly becomes the most focused man in the world once you start talking

He may doze off during oficial meetings but when you're talking its a completly different story

It doesnt even matter what you're talking about,you could be talking about the dumbest thing in the world for all he cares,after all its you that's talking,who else could be more important to him?

He also has a way of always making you feel special and deserving of everything

He for one,treats you like a princess no matter what,even if he teases you often he always means it in a lighthearted way

Another thing that simply melts your heart is how he always seems to plan dates with you that he always puts a lot of effort into because he wants you to feel special on your weekly date night,lets not talk about anniversaries,birthdays,and whatnot

The way he is so sweet with the birds and animals surrounding him always seems to have a way to make you internally awe

When he's outside a bird will perch on his shoulder and he'll just pet it so softly,its like all of these birds already know him because the same ones seems to be coming and going

Blade

Now listen to me,this guy has a barely existent romantic side,but

Inbetween all of his teasing that makes you want to smack that annoyingly handsome face of his,between all of those times he looks so cold and uncaring,almost as if he doesnt enjoy your company,each and every single time you think he simply despises you he suddenly does something that shows you he still loves you just as much

He may not be the perfect lover or partner but he tries

When you wake up without him by your side you wake up to breakfast already made and a little note saying "Dont forget to eat"

When you go to bed at night and he thinks you're asleep you never miss that small 'i love you' tha the couldnt bring himself to say in other conditions

When talking with Kafka privately she cant help but point out how whipped blade seems for you,and all you can respond with is pure shock

As she lists down things you would have never noticed if she handnt pointed out or explained to you

His protectiveness over you,you're his treasure,and he is your protector after all,he cant let you get even a slight scratch

How each and every single time he tries to verbalize his feelings for you he just cant put it into words,so he uses other ways

He often brings back gifts for you from wherever he's went,and whenever he's around he never leaves your side,wanting to savour your presence just a little longer

You're in the bathroom? Fine,he'll wait by the door. You're eating? Great he'll nethier eat with you or sit next to you. You have nothing to do? Even better come do something with him

Gepard

Gepard is a busy man,being the head of the silvermane guards and all,but that doesnt mean you're not one of his top priorities

Even if he is on duty or not he is always available for you,just dont try to take him away from his patrol,otherwise you're free to rant to him,talk to him,even if he'd prefer for you to go back to safety

Once he's finally off duty you and his sister are at the top of his list of people to find

After he passed by his sister's workshop he goes straight to your home like a child that is about to do their favourite activity

And even if while he is on duty he only has a short break,if its long enough he's coming to check in on you and his sister

To everyone else he is the head of the silvermane guards,a strong and unvwavering man,but to you,he's a puppy that never wants to leave your side

When he finally has the free time he's a lost puppy just following wherever you go and enjoying your presence

His sister loves teasing him about how lovestruck he is for you,but he cant deny a single thing because its all true,all he can do is shake his head at her antics and blush

Gepard also tries his best to make the most of every single moment he has with you

And he treasures everything he recieves from you,whether it be memories or physical things,whatever you gift him is sacred to him

Serval

The way Serval searches for you in the crowd during her performances and the moment she spots you her face lits up and its like she gained a new boost of energy

Or the way she wraps her arms around you lovingly and nuzzles closer to you during the mornings mumbling a sleepy 'good morning sunshine'

To her,your opinion is one of the most important things,and it simply melts you away to see the way she takes your opinion into consideration and is always so considerate of you

She may not look like the kind to be a doting mother to other people but to you,she is always like a mother nagging at you for going out into Belobog's icy wheather without proper layers of clothing like she doesnt walk around with a cropt top and without a sleeve+a skirt

Being caring and attentive is something she obtained from being Gepard's older sister

And while she thought that her habit of being protective ended once Gepard became a silvermane guard oh boy was she wrong,the moment you entered the picture she was back to her doting and and protective self,she thinks you dont like it but truly,it warms you up more than any coat could knowing this

During late nights in the workshop where you are simply falling asleep while forcing yourself to remain awake,for the sake of waiting for her to come to bed with you,she lightly scolds you about not sleeping not like she doesnt stay up until unholy hours tinkering with different things

But she'll still softly turn around to you,take you into her arms,speaking in such a soft and loving voice about how you should go to sleep

She truly knows how to turn into a puddle

Stelle

You are her charger,when she comes back onto the express,tired and drained of energy she takes your hand and rags you to your room so she can lay in your arms for as long as she needs,you're a person that will never drain her energy or make her tired,you're her safe space,and she is yours aswell

She never fails to turn you into a puddle with some of her pick up lines,some are super corny,but on the rare occasion she makes the sweetest pick up lines that turn you into a blushing mess

She never stops trying to fluster you with her pickup lines no matter how far into the relationship you are or how corny they are

She'll also randomly fall asleep on you,whether she falls asleep on your shoulder,lap,or on top of you while cuddling its a sign of how much she trusts you,its a sign that she feels safe falling asleep in your presence because she knows you will take care of her while she sleeps,or sleep together with her

She also cant help the lovesick grin that forms on her face whenever you are ranting to her about something

She'll be leaning into the palm of her head,her head slightly tilted to the side as she listens to you rant with the most inlove expression you could have ever seen on her face

Also dont try to stop her from carrying everything,and i mean it,if you go out shopping she is your personal bag carrier,if you have to move something heavier in the express she is going to move it for you,no questions asked,she just wants to help you and make sure you dont over carry

She also adores when you dress in matching outfits,or if you ever let her do your hair,the expression of pure joy she has on her face is enough to melt your heart no matter how much ice or cold there may be in it

She just loves your presence and doing things for you

Yanqing

You can never miss the way his eye light up even at the mere mention of your name

When you walk into a room searching for Yanqing and he spots you his previously uncaring and bored eyes suddenly light up with happiness as a small smile makes its way onto his face when he sees you running up to you to give you a big bear hug

Or the way he'll always take the time to explain things to you no matter how many times he's already explained it or how easy the topic is,if you ask him something,even if he'll be giving you the same answer for 100th time he's still going to answer with the same patience and smile

Or how he lets you win during board games,or any game really just to see your happy face when you win for the god knows which time in that row,and yet he can never get upset about losing when he sees you cheering about your win

Or how he so tenderly helps you brush your hair,or do your hair care routine,how he so gently brushes through it careful as to not pull on your hair

And he's always gentle with you,not just when brushing your hair,that gentleness just makes your heart flutter

And the way he's always willing to adapt to you

If you have less energy and prefer to sleep more he'll plan activities that favour your low energy

If you are more energised that great,he has someone who can keep up with him

He'll love you nethier way really

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

#hsr x reader #yanqing hsr #serval x reader #serval #jing yuan #jing yuan x reader #blade hsr #blade x reader #jing yuan hsr #hsr kafka #kafka x reader #gepard #gepard hsr #gepard x reader #stelle #stelle hsr #stelle x reader

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e-m-ma-lmfao · 11 months ago

Note

hi! i literally love how you write❤️

could you write a fluff with a little bit of nsfw (if you dont take nsfw requests, just do it all fluff, i love fluff so i doesnt bother me) with a fem reader x cloud?

here's how i want the story, but you can obviosuly change it to your preferences.

y/n was a childood friend of cloud,and she didnt see him in A LOT of years. then she encounters him and they basically talk about rhe the good old times. a month passes and it's y/n's birthday, they all celebrate at the bar and give y/n a present. then it's cloud turn to give her the present, and he gives her a boquet and a letter with some photos from much years ago. after that, he kisses her and she kisses back. after the birthday party, cloud was a little bit drunk so y/n took him at her house to take care of him and cloud gets all clingy and says things to y/n. (if you want to add some nsfw, you can add it in this part of the story)

thank you❤️

Happy Birthday Slowpoke

pairing : cloud strife x fem! reader

description : an unexpected reunion leads to birthday wishes, unspoken love confessions, and drunken kisses.

warnings : small make out sesh but no smut, drinking alcohol (clouds gets drunk)

Sector 7 gets quieter at night. Never silent. But quiet. Walking through the streets is much nicer at night when there aren't so many people pushing to get through. It’s easier to think. Easier to take in your surroundings.

There’s a certain hum that brings you comfort as you walk through the nearly empty streets. You remember when you first came to Sector 7, nervous and scared, and still dealing with the aftershock of Nibelheim.

Nibelheim. Cloud.

God. How was he still stuck so deep in your head after years?

You missed him. Him and his stupid blond hair.

It was embarrassing how fast your head would turn at the sight of any blond man. Any. Even children sometimes. You had to catch a second glance to make sure you hadn’t just seen your childhood friend run past you as he giggled with his friends. It was never him, but you hoped.

The peace of your walk was disturbed by a man walking past you. Bright blond hair fluff led up like the feathers of a chocobo in black clothes, and heavy footsteps. He pays you no mind as he walks past you, but you force yourself to do a double take.

But this man is different. Even with his back turned to you he feels familiar. His hair stands up, the way Clouds did when he was a child. He’s dressed in the garb of a SOLDIER with a big sword on his back, Clouds always promised he’d become a SOLDIER. And he even walks the same way Cloud would as a kid, trudging along his path, god forbid someone think of him as anything but independent.

It all feels too coincidental. And without thinking your lips open to speak, “Cloud?”

“Hm?” The man turns, only his head and shoulder so as to not pay you too much care, to face you. And your mind is flooding with nostalgia.

You're running after a young boy, blond haired, breathless laughs leave yours and his mouths.

“Cloud!!! Wait for me!!” You squeal after the older

boy whose legs carry him much faster than you can keep up with. And your tired legs, mixed with your lack of available air, are making it harder to match his pace.

For a minute you think he doesn’t hear you, or maybe, that he doesn't want to listen. But soon enough he skids to a stop, looking back at you as he pants lightly. He wears a stupid smile on his face, cheeks flushed.

“Sorry y/n.. I keep forgetting I’m too fast for you. Your little legs can’t keep up,” He teases and lets out a juvenile giggle.

Finally you meet his side, matching his breath, “They can so!”.

“Yeah right slow poke.” A childlike pout appears on your face, fitting for an 8 year old you. Always pouting. Always following after Cloud.

You were never really sure why Cloud kept you around. But when you were kids, it never really mattered for more than a second. You just liked being around him, and him you.

“It’s not fair. You're older, your legs are longer!” He smiles down at you, laughing between heavy breaths.

“Only a year older.”

“Still!” He stays quiet for a minute, letting you catch your breath without teasing you further.

When you finally straighten back up, he’s still showing a giddy smile on his lips. Without a word, he grabs your hand in his, and takes off running the same way he had been before. Only this time you can keep up with him, pulled behind him.

“Cloud!”

“Hm?” He turns to look behind him, a wide smile full of teeth on his face and eyes bright and blue. Still hopeful.

His eyes meet yours and you realize the same blue eyes are looking into yours, only they are tired and the hope of his youth has been long gone. Yours probably look the same, usually. But right now they are wide and beginning to tear up. And his pupils, blown in recognition, are nearly as wide as yours.

“Y/n?”

“Cloud!” In an instant you latched onto him, arms wrapped tightly around his torso. Your face squished against his hard chest, probably wetting the front of his tank top from the tears slipping from your eyes.

He’s hesitant, but eventually one hand lands on your back and the other grabs onto your waist, pulling you in impossibly closer to his body. When you were kids, hugs were nothing out of the ordinary, but this one feels so different. You’ve been longing to hug him since you were 13, longing to see him since you were 17.

It’s overwhelming, the amount of emotion flowing through your body. You're happy to see your best friend again. You're sad that you haven’t seen him in so long. And you're angry that he left without ever saying goodbye.

“Y..you.. are you real?”

You look up to find his voice, wiping away the wetness from your face. His hands move to touch your face, then to your shoulders and finally fall to his sides.

“Yes, Cloud. I'm real. When..how.. It’s been years Cloud.”

“I know.”

There are a million things you’d like to say to him. You’d like to scream at him and punch at his chest until he bruises, not likely you could hit him hard enough to leave any marks but you’d try. But then you want to hug him, and run through the streets with him hand and hand like when you were kids. You don’t know what to say to him, where to start, or if you even should.

“I missed you.”

“I know.” He doesn’t say it back, and the lack of emotion that he shows is almost aggravating. But you don’t make it known to him how annoyed you are at him for his underwhelming reaction to this reunion.

You invite him back to your apartment and, with a lot of convincing no and many ‘pleases’, he agrees to join you for an hour tops. His hesitancy hurts your feelings, you don’t admit that to him though, god forbid he realize that you hadn’t changed much since you were young. Since he clearly had.

“You can sit down, you know.” He raises his brows, your acknowledgment of his awkwardness unexpected, but he takes a seat at your small table. The chair he sits in is the perfect size for you, and while he’s not the tallest man you’ve ever encountered, he almost seems to not fit on it.

He is so silent, it stirs up years of pent up sadness and frustration deep within you, and inside you deeper still a fury of anger festers. But you push it away, locking those emotions up for another night when you haven’t just stumbled into your best friend of 10 years after 4 years of being apart. And you offer him a drink.

“Are you gonna tell me what you’ve been up to for the last 4 years?” He is silent, stoic, hides his face by taking a sip from the glass of water you offered him.

“Not tonight.” Your teeth grind together inside your mouth, holding back your tongue from spewing words better left unsaid. He must see the clench in your jaw, the anger and disappointment in your eyes, “But another time. I will.”

You fill the rest of the night with slow, and awkward, conversation. He doesn't make much effort to initiate it, but he answers your earnest questions without any complaint. At least the ones that don’t involve his work, his past, his lack of a goodbye. So the night moves slowly.

It doesn’t feel like very long has passed at all by the time he tells you he has to leave.

“Already?”

“Yes. I’m sorry, my days are busy.”

“Are you staying in Sector 7?” He nods, you're not appreciating this strong and silent thing he has going on.

“Working?” Another nod. “Well..if you find yourself free next month, we’re celebrating my birthday at the Seventh Heaven..uh.. it’s Tifa's bar actually.!”

“I know.”

“Oh.. yeah I guess, you would’ve gone to see her.”

“I didn’t go t- .. I’m sorry. I should go.” He walks to the door, posture straight and stoic expression broken by a look of pity for just a moment. You walk him out.

You can’t help yourself from speaking as your eyes meet his back, your mind is lacking in self restraint tonight, “Will you come?”

He faces you, mouth parted before a small smile plants itself there, “I’ll try, y/n, goodnight.” And he’s gone into the night with quickened steps.

“Hey! Have some faith in him. I’m sure he’ll make it.” Tifa leans over the counter with a bright smile, sliding a drink into your hands.

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

The bar isn’t full, but the people that matter are here, most of them anyway.

Biggs and Wedge, probably already tipsy based on the volume they're producing, are playing darts in the corner. Barret sits on the other end of the bar, Marlene seated beside him as they whisper between each other. And Tifa stands in front of you, a positive grin lingering on her face.

“Y/n!” Marlene springs off the barstool, with the help of her father, and rushes over to you with a clumsily wrapped gift in her hands.

“For me? Well thank you, Marlene.” You smile down at her, gently taking the gift from her hands and unwrapping it to find a bracelet made of beads and charms.

“I made it for you. And I have one too! See?” She holds up her wrist, which you hadn’t realized was hidden behind her back, to show you the matching bracelet she wears. You lift into your arms, holding her in a tight hug.

“They’re perfect Marlene, thank you.”

With her still in your arms, you resume conversation with Tifa, and are promptly joined by Barret. You love them, like family of course. But you are so focused on the lack of Clouds presence that you forget to fully no appreciate the ones around you.

Tifa reaches behind her, into the fridge and pulls outs an obviously homemade cake. “We decorated it together,” She slides a wink Marlene’s way and begins lighting the candles. “Make a wish y/n.”

You think for a moment, it’s childish that you're hoping for your wish to work so genuinely, but you take a deep breath and blow out your candles with a heavy breath. One sweep.

“What’d you wish for y/n?” Marlene’s voice is loud beside you.

“Hey now.. you know the rules, I can’t tell you or else it won’t come true.” She pouts for a minute but her smile quickly returns when Tifa hands her a piece of cake. You take your own piece in your hands, sharing a smile with Tifa and Marlene.

“Hey man! Good to see you. Glad you could make it.”

Your eyes are moving faster than you can focus on the sound of Biggs’ words, finding the one person your wish standing in the doorway. In his hands he holds a bouquet, flowers of your favorite colors wrapped with paper and a pink bow.

He approaches you with a sheepish smile on his face, “Sorry I’m late. I didn’t know what to get you as a gift, I hope I got the colors right. Oh! And there’s this,” He reaches into his back pocket and hands you a sealed envelope. On its cover, your name is written in messy writing.

“These are ..beautiful, Cloud, thank you.”

“Drink?” Tifa is cheery, as always, if not more so.

“Yeah, thanks.” He takes a seat beside you and you try to hide the way your eyes linger on him. The muscles in his grown arms. The familiarity of his spiky hair. You're not so angry anymore, now that you've had time to process his return, rather longing for the relationship you had as kids. The closeness you’d been lacking in your friendships since he left.

“Are you gonna open it?”

“What?” His voice brings you back to the moment, and you realize you’ve been ogling at him.

“The envelope..”

“Oh! Yeah, right. Yeah.”

You reach for it and carefully open it, trying not to rip the paper too badly. Tucked inside the envelope is a photo of the two of you as children and a folded up letter, reading :

This is stupid. But I tried to write something so I wouldn’t have to say all this out loud.

I haven’t been around for a long time, so I don’t really know where we stand anymore. But as far as I know, you’ve been the only person I’ve been able to open up to about everything.

Without you, I probably would’ve spent my childhood alone.

When we were kids, I swore I’d be a SOLDIER. But to be honest it wasn’t all I thought it would be. And I’m sorry I left you for shinra.

And I know I should’ve said goodbye, and I probably hurt you when I left. But I’m here now, and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon.

You were my best friend or you are my best friend, doesn't matter.

Happy Birthday Slowpoke.

He looks at you intensely as he tries to gauge your reaction. It’s a simple letter, and could be written by a child with a little effort. But it’s Cloud, and it’s the most you can ask from a man like him. It still has your hands wiping at your eyes.

“Hey, did you make her cry? No crying on your birthday!” Tifa returns, leaning over the counter to slide Cloud his drink, looking over at you. “Y’alright?”

“Yeah I’m okay. I’m really good actually, thank you.. for this, Cloud”.

He nods, and you swear his cheeks redden, but he looks away before either you or Tifa can comment on it.

Cloud's drink is gone in moments, and he is asking for another, whilst making comfortable conversation with you. A ‘happy birthday’ ‘how’s your day been’ ‘what do you do for work now’ kind of comfortable. He doesn’t ask anything personal, does not dwell on the past, you almost wish he would.

But you indulge him and his calculated questions, being satisfied with any conversation at all, and let the night flow.

It doesn't take long to realize that Cloud is not a drinker, or at least that he does not know his limits. It’s dark out now, and music plays from the jukebox, and Cloud sways drunkenly to a song. You can’t help but laugh, whilst also feeling weird seeing him be so free and not high strung. Not a SOLDIER, just a man.

He stands up, grabbing onto your arm to pull you over in front of the jukebox where Wedge is dancing with Tifa.

“Careful Cloud!” You stumble after him, bumping into his chest as he pulls you. He doesn’t seem to notice, grabbing onto your hands to spin you and move you around.

“You're a pretty good dancer now,” He moves you to face him, moving to the music still with a goofy smile on his face, “Do you remember.. when we..when we were kids and you would step on my feet ..everytime we danced.”

You giggle at his slurred words, “You're so drunk right now.”

“And you’re ..sso pretty..” He moves in closer, close enough that you can smell the liquor lingering on his lips.

“Oh wow.. you're really drunk.. haha.” You make no effort to move away from him, but you laugh at his actions to relieve the awkwardness flowing from your body.

“Mhm..” He closes the gap and places his lips against yours. Your hands find his chest, eyes falling close as you kiss him back. Your self control is weak, and you want to keep his lips against yours. But he's drunk, and your head is starting to spin.

Somehow you find the strength to push him away and he moves away with a pout on his puffy lips.

“Let’s.. uh.. get you home, yeah?”

“But I’m having fun!” He attempts to spin you, but he ends up making himself dizzy, “Actually, yeah.. that’s probably a good idea.”

“Yeah.” You laugh at his flushed face, holding onto his arm as you say goodbye to everyone and leave the bar.

“Can we go to yours?” He doesn't let go of you, even after you’ve walked halfway down an empty Sector 7 road, but he has instead moved his grip to hold your hand to keep you close to him.

“My apartment?”

“Mhm.”

“Yeah..yeah sure.” He leads you to your own apartment like he knows the route by heart, he’s only been there once and yet he acts like he lives there by the speed he finds it.

Once inside he collapses onto your bed, not much space in the apartments, so you suppose that was normal considering there was no couch.

“Do you want some water?” He shakes his head, laying on his back to stare up at the ceiling.

You move towards the stereo on the opposite wall, turning on the radio so there is noise for you to focus on instead of his arms as they rest underneath his head.

“I missed you too .. y'know.” Clouds words barely make their way to you, his voice quiet and music humming just loud enough.

“Hm?” You turn to face him, moving to sit on the ledge of the bed in front of where he lays.

“The night I saw you,” He leans on his elbow to hold himself up, “you said that you missed me. and I didn’t say it back. I did. I missed you. I just didn’t know what to say to you then.”

You don’t say anything, you're not sure what to say anyways.

He looks into your eyes for a few minutes before pulling you by your arm so you lay beside him, but he shifts positions so he holds himself above you with his hands.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.”

His lips meet yours once more. But unlike the bar this kiss is calculated, not clumsy and childish. He is drunk, and it’s obvious by the taste that remains on his lips even after he has licked them clean multiple times.

Your fingers find his hair, his knee finds its way between your legs and your chest begins to move quicker. He moves to latch his lips onto your neck, sucking spots that will definitely be purple and red tomorrow, while his hands find their place under your shirt on your hips.

And while you’d love for Cloud to continue his journey, the fact remains that he is drunker than a teenager on their 18th birthday, and you want this moment to be one enjoyed sober. So you pull his head up to meet his eyes, and very puffy lips.

“Your drunk Cloud. I think we better save this for another night.”

He pouts, face flushed, but he nods with a sigh. Getting comfy he finds a place to rest his head, on your chest, but his hands don’t move from your skin. If anything you feel his grip tighten, keeping you close as he practically lays on top of you.

“I missed you, a lot. I thought I'd never see you again when you left.” Your fingers find his hair once more, rubbing at his scalp and playing with blond strands.

“I know. I didn’t think I’d see you either.”

The room is quiet, except for the soft hum of music flowing from the stereo. His fingers tense and relax again in sync with his slow breaths, moving to trace the softness of your skin. But eventually his movements stop and he seems to still.

“Cloud?”

There are still a million things you’d like to ask, like to say. And so many years of words you’d like to catch up on between him, months of love confessions that you had admitted to Tifa that you’d like to share with him. But the soft snores that begin to leave his mouth tell you he’s in no mood to talk right now.

“Goodnight soldier..”

#cloud strife x reader #cloud strife #cloud ff7 #fem reader #ff7 #drabble #oneshot #final fantasy x reader #final fantasy vii #final fantasy 7 #final fantasy

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nataliesscatorccio · 2 years ago

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this line in the description for Yellowjackets really gets to me. "25 years later, they discover that what began in the wild is far from over." time and time again im just struck by how effective this show is at saying exactly what it feels like to go through life as a woman. you still have this girl inside you who is wild and childish and scared. she doesn't know how to move her body she doesn't know how to ask for what she wants she's a freak she's an idol she's a mess she's a messiah she's a witch and a wicked little beast she's the best friend a girl could have. but it's time to be an Adult Woman now! congratulations, you're out of the woods! we know that was confusing and traumatic for you but rest assured thats all done. maybe you'll have a husband and a teenager of your own maybe you'll be a politician maybe you're going to run a mlm. it doesnt matter, just make sure you're unrecognizable from the wild animal you were. you're supposed to be unrecognizable. you're supposed to have it together, you're supposed to be boring. strawberry lube is for bisexuals and goths. and teenagers. Please be more boring. this Whole Thing this whole charade of adulthood doesn't work if you don't keep it together. grow up! so you do. for a while it sticks. your family is doing fine, your career is doing fine, your meds are working fine, maybe you've been to a few rehabs but this last one was going fine. and 25 years later you look around at the not-real life you're supposed to want to be a part of, the one you put together exactly as per the instructions, and you realize... it doesnt end. you aren't out of the woods you're just stranded in a different part of them. you probably have another 25 years to go, minimum. "I think shit is gonna get a lot worse out here." your life is far from over but you can't keep living it like this. numbing yourself with substances to make it tolerable, or going full speed ahead toward something you don't even really want just to prove you're Doing It you're Assimilating, or feeling insane for still being haunted by 'ancient' history that really didn't happen that long ago, or cooking a fucking meatloaf for the husband that doesn't get you and the daughter that doesn't want to. if you're going to survive the monotony of adulthood the way you survived the chaos of adolescence, you're going to have to get wild again. you're going to have to go back. because the wilderness can be terrifying with its harsh elements its cruel indifference its lurking predators and blah blah blah but do you want to know what's even scarier? that endless stretch in all directions of sameness. stump, tree, stream, moss. stump, tree, stream, moss. have we passed this way already, have we taken this route before? tree tree tree tree tree for miles and miles and miles. that is the wild, too. unending. repetitive. barren. where it ends, so do you. it lasts your whole life, and it's far from over. you've got to find a way to survive it. again.

#for instance somewhere inside me is still a college girl who loves to write papers on film analysis and comparative essays #and yellowjackets is letting me let that feral goblin out of the sack for a bit #otherwise I'd wither and die in the monotony #yellowjackets #natalie scatorccio #shauna shipman #taissa turner #lottie matthews #misty quigley #van palmer

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cherubispunk · 11 months ago

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CHERUB (PART III) - Dealer!Joel Miller x AFAB!Reader

summary: the devil has a funny habit of making you want your own suffering.

a note from Lucy: Well, this is it folks. The third and final instalment of the unholy trinity that is cherub. The fic that i had no idea would get this amount of traction. The fic that gave me my username, blog theme, the majority of my mutuals and the freedom to explore more taboo areas of writing that I never felt comfortable with doing before. I just wanted to thank you all for all the kind words you’ve shared with me. Comments, reblogs, messages, they all mean the utter world. But i also want to specifically thank @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin who was such a huge help for motivation when wrting each of these. She's been there since the first day of cherub and always let me obsess over dealer!joel with her. Ange, i love you baby. Out of all my fandom experiences, this has definitely been one of the best. I know this sounds a lot like a goodbye completely, but it's not i swear! I just never really knew where this was going, but I think this is a pretty good way to end the series and I hope you agree too. Part of me isn't ready to let go after such a short run, but I honestly have no idea where to go from here so I think I did it as much justice as I could. Regardless, Cherub and Dealer!Joel will forever have a place in my heart all thanks to you lovely lot! Your love means the world to me and you are all so easy to share this with, you've given me an environment to flourish creatively and I'm eternally grateful for that. I wish you all the love, hugs, kisses, and angel wishes in the world!

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wc: 5548 Warnings: 18+ MDNI! DARK CONTENT! Unedited for now, no outbreak, no use of y/n but joel calls the reader ‘Cherub’, plot? what plot? we all know we're here for the porn anyway, bombastic age gap (reader is in her early 20’s and Joel is in his late 50s), gore imagry, religious imagry, Smut, very dubcon in theory but both want it bad, grafic smut, P in V sex (unprotected — pleaseee don’t do tis irl i beg of you), teasing, sort of edging? (idk what to call it but he doesnt fuck you until you beg for it lol). nipple play, biting biting biting!!!!!, references to domestic violence, use of pet names, manipulative! joel, stupid stupid cherub, stockholm syndrome, oral (f receiving), cum eating, pussy slapping, Joel being foul mouthed, cursing, dirty talk, overstimulation. Again, some of the most animalistic, disgustingly wretched and vile vile vile porn I have written thus far…with so little plot that this earned me my place in hell, i have my own circle now. Big Dick Joel Miller comes as his own warning.

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The danger didn't lie in his hands. It didn't sit in his closed first to be suffocated. Choked out until the life of it was compressed. Until its face was blue, then purple and its eyes were bloodshot and streaked with red. The danger lay in your heart. And it thrived off the beating.

What is ‘it’, you ask? Mania.

The Greeks had it nailed down when they split love seven different ways. To the crucifix through its punctured and bleeding palms. All equal, but different. They understood that one love is different to the other. That love can be either obsession, or lingering in the quiet parts of a person's mind. You cannot hold up a mirror to one and deceive into believing it is another. No matter how sweet the lie seeps into the ear. They don't work that way. You were not Lucifer, you had no forked tongue. And your mania wasn't Eve. There was no apple to devour. Only the strong arm of Joel Miller to cling to like a noose.

Some love passionately. Find it in the scathing friction of flesh upon flesh. The heat two bodies make only in sex. You were no body anymore. Merely a corpse for him to dig up and breathe life into whenever he needed relief. So it was not Eros. Some love playfully. In the back and forth of a conversation that makes the mind and heart float in the clouds among the soul. Entwine them together until you are too sedated to know the difference between the three pillars of personal holy trinity. There was nothing lighthearted about Joel Miller. So there was no Ludus. Affection. The subtle, it-is-there-even-when-it-is-not weight of lovers hand in lovers hand. Joel clutched your throat with his heavy hand. He didn't lace your fingers in his like tapestry threads. And he was anything but friendly. So it could never be Philia. He was not unconditional. Familial. Constant. Committed. Long lasting. Selfless. He crept in through the backdoor and took. Then slipped back out. So the thick blood red line was drawn through Storge. Agape. Pragma. The love you had was not for yourself. Without him you hated yourself. Hated how you didn’t feel needed. Or wanted. So Philautia was buried six feet under hot earth, the final nail in the coffin that was lowered into the rotting, thick-with-decaying-mulch, stenching ground. By none other than Mania.

This was something you came to realise as you stumbled from his truck back to your room. His come dribbling down your leg. Luke asleep on the sofa. Months passed of the same thing. He’d take you home from work, only letting you go once he'd had his fill. Played out the sick fantasy from mind to matter, let it bleed through his fingers into fruition. You let it happen for mania. It was the thing inside you that kept you going. Before you thought mania fed off your heartbeat. But now you realised mania fed your heartbeat. The kick it got every second fired the next muted pulse. That's what kept it alive. Energy for energy. You were never one to bite the hand that feeds. That’s a sinner's duty.

—

The usual sight of Luke slumped in his lazy boy, guzzling beer was what you expected. The liquor once again swigged past his lips and dribbling down his stubbled chin. Wiry greying hair greasy on his head, balding. Thinning. Residue from a line on the coffee table. You were never tempted by it before. And you were determined never be a Angel dust statistic like him.

Instead, you opened the flimsy door of your trailer to see him hunched over a small collapsible table. His hand running over his sunken eyes, dragging purple eye bags down with his fingertips in shame. Cards in his other. It had your breath catching in your throat like a hare in a wire snare trap. This time around the small collapsible round table. Cards in his hand. And two other men shared a knowing glance and a grim smile of satisfaction. Him.

Joel Miller.

The tension was thicker than molasses in the room. You only wished it was as sweet. You swallowed it down thickly. It stretched your throat. You watched in morbid fascination when he lay his hand on the table in a fan for all to horror at, a sly smirk slithering over his lips and curling the one corner of it up like a scorpion's tail.

“Full house.”

“Fuck!” And Luke’s hand slapped the tabletop as he folded.

The door clicked. All three looked up to see you. Luke, Joel, and the man who held a familiar resemblance to your own personal devil. With eyes on you, you felt more like that hare in the snare than ever. Clapping eyes on the hungry wolf as mutton dripped bloody from his sneer. Cruel and hungry. You imagined him as that wolf, hyde thick and bristled under your soft fingers as he led you to some deep, dark, thorny place. A place only lit by the eyes of owls who observed while he had his way with you. Ripped your stockings to get to sweet fruit.

“Great, the cunt is home.” Luke spat to the room but you, looking over the table again as he bit his thumb nervously to the edge of the hangnail. “Get me a beer.” Your nostrils flared in defiance at his demand, knuckles pale as fingers furled into a fist. An army of goosebumps had stood to attention all along your arms and the back of your neck. A shiver shattering down your spine. Your heart had enough of its prison of your ribcage in your anger, ramming into it over and over in a frantic hammering. And when that wasn't enough, you felt it in your throat. Among the tightening of your airways. “You hear me girl?” He asked, looking at you. He stood, chair scraping against the floor and you staggered back to the point your shoulderblades hit the door. While he was a thin, wiry man, he had a vicious backhand that stung. Like a vengeful aftertaste. “Y’need me to beat some sense inta ya girl, huh?!” You dared to spare a glance at Joel who was too busy collecting his winnings. You soon to be among them.

“Sorry.” You mumbled, looking to the floor and cowering off to the kitchen to get him his beer.

“Y’short, Luke.” You heard from the doorway, straining to hear the tail end of the conversation. Something about your uncle having it by monday. And then Joel telling him he shouldn’t raise a bet he doesn't have the dough to cover.

It took a second to catch your breath. Tears strung in your eyes and your chest threatened to split in two. Your sternum felt like it was cracking down the middle into clean halves under the weight of your chest. A hand clasped over your quivering lips to bite back a horrible sob and muffle it. Only your palm could know you were crying miserably. So you took a beer from the fridge, heard the hiss as the lid gave way and popped off. It clattered to the linoleum and you bared your teeth at the grating sound, picking it up and tossing it in the bin.

“Here.” You mumbled, placing it unceremoniously on the table in front of Luke.

“Y’got any spare cash on you, girl?” Luke asked, beady eyes staring you down as he raised the bottle to his lips and took a drink. You grimaced inwardly at the sight of his yellow teeth when he made a satisfied sigh.

“No.”

Joel’s brow raised. You should know by now not to lie to a man who can read you like a book. That's the thing about narcissists. They have a way of being able to understand you like a one word sentence on paper. A quick glance and you’re unravelling with concealed meaning and connotation.

“C’mon, Cherub…gotta have something from workin’ this late in that diner of yours…” You dared to challenge Joel with a look. A look that retreated soon after the advance of the glare of his eye. The same glare of the hungry wolf. Of the cheated man. It was unkind, and unyielding, and did not hold mercy upon the souls of the enthralled, the damned, or the harrowed. You might try to cross through the sentence, or turn the page. Or shut the book entirely. But the truth is still the truth even when you chose not to look. This was the man that knew your mind. Knew your body. And coaxed his will out of you each time. His word was all it took to cave, so you took the folded bills from your apron, flicking through them with a bitten back scowl,

“How much does he owe you?” Joel smiled with amusement, counting through his winnings to see what was short.

“Ninety-eight.”

‘What?” you asked, eyes wide, hurt. Disheartened. Fingers stilling halfway through the small stack. And Joel smirked.

“You heard me, Cherub.”

“Give Joel his money.” Luke warned.

“But it’s not his money! And it’s not yours to give!” You tried, and saw the warning tick of your uncle's narrow jaw. It was always set on edge before he threw a hand. Cast a palm across your cheek in a brandishing. It had you cowering. Relenting. Tossing the money in front of him. If it fell to the floor in its flurry he could pick it up and grovel about it. But Joel never grovelled. Only relished. Then reminded Luke of the money he still owed for the drugs.

And you walked back to the kitchen, biting into your lip again. With the devil and your demon in the next room over, you were sure this could be hell. A buzz filled your ears. Like the constant thrum of flies over roadkill. In festering flesh wounds where broken white of bone poked through gaping, bleeding holes. Blood matted in the hyde of the animal helpless and scattered across the road. A leg here, smashed teeth there. You were the roadkill. Joel was at the wheel of that which mowed you down. Luke was howling in the passenger side.

His boots thumped clumsily over the linoleum and he let out a huff through his nose while he adjusted his low slung jeans in the doorway.

“Cherub?” He asked, clearing his throat huskily — a consequence of the smokes he used religiously. You stood with your back to him, palms flat to the countertop and head hung low to fight the sting of tears simmering from within.

“He threatened to hit me.” You whispered, not turning to face him. If you mattered his ears would strain to meet you halfway. “And you did nothing.”

“Come on, Cherub…don't be like that.” he sighed, and you imagined him pinching the bridge of his hooked nose.

“He took my money. You took my money. How am I gonna get out of here without it?” You croaked, your tired eyes seeing faces of gaping mouths and slate black eyes in the speckled linoleum of the counter.

No reply came from the door. And when you turned it was empty. He had left. The other man had left. The tv was on again with the scream of a woman murdered. And Luke fell asleep in his lazy boy.

—

Another day, another shift. And more horror ensued. At first, what set the nerves thrumming was there was no sign of Luke. His truck was gone from its spot. No drunk slumped on the worn leather settee. No scream or grotesque image on the TV. Merely an empty bottle on the coffee table.

You swallowed, shutting the door cautiously with a muffled click of the latch. You didn't dare call his name. Just pushed it down into your stomach for it to churn the thought up in acid. But the horror jumped back up your throat into a lurid scream at the sight of your mattress tossed to the side. The moth bitten pillowcase on the floor, void of money. Your money. Gone. Someone had rifled through your belongings. Turned your only space into a mess. Strewn clothes, bed sheets, pillows in their haste. All your work. All the nights of living off bitter coffee from the pot at work, scrounging together tips. It made you seethe. The heat was an inferno at your fingertips, nails embedding crescents into your palms. You searched all over for it. But to no avail.

When Uncle Luke came home, he smelled of hard liquor. It was a miracle – or curse – he hadn't wrapped his car around a tree. He gloated, and sneered, and shoved it down your throat in his intoxication that he’d found it under the mattress. Joel had called him, told him you planned on leaving. And he connected the dots. Ransacked your room. Oh, how the man would hate his loose lips when you gave him hellfire.

You expected Luke’s reaction. You knew if he were to ever find out he’d snatch it up in his greedy, grimy hands and take it for himself. He spent all of it. Paid his debt to Joel, gambled some on bad luck bets, drank with the rest. Slugged liquor down his throat and got drunk off your labour. And then left you on your floor with tear stained cheeks and a heart of heavy lead.

You wanted your money. But would you take from the man who gave you your everything? Your sense of being. A religion and faith. You believed in nothing more than the way he held your name between his teeth. You forgot what your real name felt like in the same place. And it occurred to you that he had never said it. Did he know it? You weren't them anymore. You were Cherub.

The sweet and mourning lamb in you wanted to go over just to be his again, and not carry out the plan of taking back what was yours. That which he would see as sin. You felt guilt claw up your throat at the thought alone. It seemed blasphemous to conspire against him. Why do you insist on protecting yourself. You who was the sacrificial lamb?

If you did go – and you let him have you again – you were whole. But at what cost? Could you stand another night of temporary hell under the guise of heaven. Of touch so cold, like ivory or black ice. To have him thumb your skin with blunt endearments and the croon of ‘cherub’ past his chapped lips. Definite like black and white. No escape. What he’d do and how. Whispering them in the stone deaf shells of your ears like they were a sculpture. Pygmalion’s Bride. He’d made you all you were today. Took chisel to marble and carved out his masterpiece. Cherub.

You were soft, and pliable. Wax heated by his flame. You kissed back. You moaned for him. Begged him for his release and not your own. Bruised with his handprint. The warmth of life under flesh. But without him…you returned to marble. Another pretty thing to be gawked at. He tempted you with it because he knew more than anyone, more than god himself who watches these exchanges, that you can't live without him. It was like telling a child not to slip off to the woods in the dead of night. That was a pointless warning. You knew what lay there anyway, what threat it would be. That wolf in his thick bristled hyde. Curled up in his den. You would see it as innocence and vulnerability if you weren't so scared. But you knew when he woke up the teeth would shine again. And they’d tear flesh. Let blood. Gnash bone. Dripping from the glaring white once he finished with your carcass. Your matter between them and your crimson lacing his gums. Who knew being eaten alive could be so pleasurable.

But then again, how could bering alone really be hell if the devil wasn't there?

There is mania in your body. But you can't get it out. It rattles in your head and lungs and glues to the backs of your gnashers. No matter how much you wish to spit it out. It infects your tongue. It welds itself to the matter of your bones. Melts into the cracks between your teeth. Claggy against your tongue. All to show the sweetest of words have the bitterest of tastes. You can feel it swell underneath your skin. In the gap between muscles where it festers and heats you up. Like fever it burns, like the fire that consumes and the pillars that hold the temple up crack, the ground shakes, and the beast rears its ugly head at you. You’re losing your body to him. It's a fight you try to win. You dare to. You give your all, tooth and nail each time in the gaps between. In the silence and hollow that nestles in the middle of the meetings. In the quiet, where no one is around but the cracked plaster of your room. You stopped caring who fired the gun first. You were always the one who got shot down in the end. Right in the stomach. Blood gurgling up your throat in a grotesque plea for help.

All these weeks you had shrunk yourself to the size of a bird in his hands, sang a sweet sweet song of his name, until the squeeze of his first closest off your throat. And the sound stopped altogether. Laid there after the warning. Patient while you had your wings clipped and your freedom taken. And he took more. Took the beating of your heart with his teeth. Took the will to want. The will to love. The will to need anything else, as well as the need to have better. Below you were the foundations. Only now you saw them for what they were, a decaying mess of fragments, the stench of wood rot hot in your nose. A musk like no other. His musk. So in your anger you took an axe to a willow to see how it would weep. You slipped past the sleeping drunk you call Uncle Luke. Out the door, over gravel, past the truck he coaxed you to without the need of a sweet treat. You’d yank the axe from the bark of the weeping willow, its sob echoing in the wind that rustled its drapery of lush green leaves. Leaves that will wilt as sap bleeds from its severed trunk. Take the axe to the wolf. Cut him. Scrotum to throat.

Take back what was yours. And leave those woods skipping.

—

Your knocks descend upon his door in quick raps until he opened it with a grumble. Then a smirk. “Evenin’, Cherub.”

No salvation. No going back. No space among the clouds. Just the fall. You pushed past him into his front room. “Where is it?’ You hissed, tossing the cushions of the couch up. Nothing there. So you left them on the floor and did the same for the airchair. Nothing there either.

“Woah, calm down, girl!’ Joel huffed, reaching for your arm, which you tugged back from him in a new found strength surging you forward, out of his arms. “Where’s what?”

“My damn money, Miller!” You bit back with venom laced spit. A hunger for revenge making you salivate like a bad dog.

“The fuck you talking about?”

“You know exactly what I'm talking about, dickhead!” And he recoiled at your bared teeth, your verbal assault and battery, but went in for his own.

“Watch your damn foul language, girl!” He warned, reaching the end of his already short tether.

“You know how much he stole from me? Three hundred dollars of my hard earned chash. Forget my fucking ticket out of this shithole, I ain’t even paying rent now! And for what? Your god awful drugs!” His nostrils flared, and you watched the vein in his neck bulge under the sweltering heat of his own anger. Coiling inside him. Wounded bitch about to bite back.

“You didn’t have much of a probelm with my drugs after I fucked that pretty little hole of yours. All dumb and needy f’me, Cherub.” You grimaced at the sneer. But the feeling made your knees buckle. The name again. Cherub. You were Cherub. His cherub. “You want ya money back, huh? You can have it.”

That made you stutter. Thoughts skidding to halt at the sight of a brick wall. Crumpled matter as it smashed into it anyway. “What?”

“I ain't giving it to you for free though.”

“You're sick! It’s my fucking money!”

“Not in the eyes of the law its not.” And he folded his great oaks of arms over his chest in satisfaction. Once again one upping you.

“The eyes of the law? Says the fucking drug dealer. I bet you got way worse than coke in duffel over there. Wonder what the law would say about that?” It was said dismissively over your shoulder as you turned to leave. Alas, once again his large hand encompassed your wrist and squeezed. Pulled you back flush to his broad chest. His breath was hot on your neck as he whispered sweetly into your ear.

“Come on now, Cherub. You wouldn't do me in like that would ya? Not when I love ya…”

The way he said it…it didn't seem real. It was false. Comforting but not real. You knew it was a lie. This wasn't love. He didnt love. If he loved you he'd ask for your number then call you. Take you out. Let you cry on his shoulder and drive you home after. Kiss you in the dark for only the walls to see. Let you stay a night or two, or a whole damn week. Give you your damn money back. Stand up to Luke with a closed fist to the face. Leave swelling and a deep bruise on his cheekbone as a first and final warning.

“You love me?” You asked, voice small and hollow in your chest.

“Yeah, Cherub. I love you too.” He cooed, as if he knew you loved him already. All this and nose running over the curve of the side of your neck, tongue trailing hot in pursuit, it had you keeling over in confession at his feet. “You’re so cute when you're angry. Come on now, lemme make those tears go away…and you can have your money back, and we can forget this ever happened.” That tone…it was patronising. It made the sense in you rattle the cage of your ribs. Claw at the bars of bone and run into them like a caged animal. Because that’s what it was. A caged animal. But your heart was holding its hand over its mouth in a trance as it let his words ebb deeper. Somewhere between desperate and divine. But what was his motive?

God, Jesus, all above that is holy, you didn't care! After all this time, it was still no secret, or hushed uttering that Joel Miller was now everywhere in you. Scraping the backs of your teeth, festering like a virus in your bloodstream. Melding to the marrow of your bones. The walls of your cunt.

He still had a devastating habit of seeping through the cracks of your closed lids. Still ready to pillage and plunder his way through your head in its numbed state of sleep. When you could have finally— finally stopped and not felt. But he ebbs deeper. Always would. Always will.

It's what got you here. It would end you if it could. Snuff out your heartbeat and the fire inside of you. All he need do was lick his fingers and press them to the wick. And leave the smoke to string out and curl. You thought you were hungry for love before. But now you realised you were just hungry for the sight of your blood on his lips. The gnashing of you between his teeth. The curl you made of his brow. If it wasn’t devastating, reaping its agony in your silly little fractured chest— you didn’t dare need, nor crave it. You came for the pleasure but you stayed for the pain. And he took again, and again.

So you let him ‘make it up to you’. Let him claw at your clothes until they were scraps on the floor. Tore your stockings. Showed you those gleaming teeth. The wolf. And you, his sacrificial lamb. His Cherub.

“Feel that?’ He asked, with the slow drag back and forth of him inside you, parting you. This wasn’t fast, or rough. This was slow. And it made you need more. Need it faster. Need him hurtling you towards the edge of harrowing oblivion. He knew that. It’s why he took his time with it this time around. “Yeah. You do.” Joel answered for you. You never had to answer. But often he made you say it from your own quivering lips. Just to have the taste of the words from your tongue bleed into his. The neverending praise. “Why would you wanna leave that Cherub?” You couldn't answer, only let out a soft sob. “Huh? Answer me, Cherub. Why’d you wanna fuckin’ leave that?” And he punctuated it with pulling out to the bulbous head of his clock, then slamming back in with one sharp thrust. And then he was still.

You whined a shallow gasp into his mouth. But he didn’t kiss you. Joel never kissed you. His teeth sinking into your bottom lip shut you right up before his tongue delved deeper into it. The thumb of the hand that slithered between your legs rolled over your clit, making you mewl over the buzz of electricity causing you to clamp down on his thick, full cock. You were so eager for more. Anything more than what he was giving you. He smirked into your mouth when he felt your hips buck forward, trying your damn hardest to push his cock deeper into you. Silly little cherub. You should know better than to defy God. “See? Felt good didn’t it?” You nodded as much as you could in your current piston.

“Mhm.”

“See what you can have if you stay. Why fight it cherub?”

“Yes, Joel.”

“You gonna listen then, Cherub?”

“Yes. Yes! I’ll listen, just-” You shuddered at the thought of it, tears brimming at the the threshold of your eye. ”Please.”

“Say it.” He waited, wanting you to beg for it in the pretty way he knew you could. The choir voice. The songbirds hymn. The whole time his eyes did nothing but stare you down hungry at the sight of you falling apart from nothing but a hand to your throat and a single his throbbing dick buried in your aching cunt. It all pooled down into your centre, creating a rush your head had trouble keeping up with. “Tell me why you wanted to leave.”

“I dunno-” You stuttered, once again rolling your hips up. His hand at your throat pressed into your skin again, harder. It choked you. It had you drawing in a sharp, meagre breath. And he pulled out, running the underside of himself through the hot, drooling seam of your cunt. You shivered when the tip brushed up to your clit momentarily. The bead of precome at his slit smearing into your sex, mixing with your slick. “I dunno, Joel. I- I just wanted my money. I just wanted out. I hate it.” You babbled through closed eyes, chest heaving with sobs, and hot tears ran thick down your flushed cheeks.

“You hate it, huh?” He mocked and crooned, still catching your clit with the tip of his cock, hips waxing and waning in a slow roll. “You hate me too?” He knew the answer. But again, it was the satisfaction of knowing you were wrapped around his finger. Ready to bend over backwards for him. Him seeping into you through the cracks of your ribs, the gaps between your teeth. The opening of yourself to the twisting knot of denial within you. Your back arched like the lofty roof of a chapel, legs parting like its heavy doors. He followed you with hunger. You opened your mouth to speak but he squeezed momentarily on your throat again, oxygen starvation and the smell of him dizzying you. He relished in the whimper that he garnered from you. That and how he left you breathless just from his cruel touch.

“No.” You garbled as his thumb unhinged your jaw. Saliva in your mouth pooling while his thumb pressed your tongue down, bitter with a smokers telltale tobacco staining. It slipped past your lips, dribbled down his digits making a sticky mess at the curve of his thick wrist. He drew up a glob of saliva in his throat, watching as it drooled thickly, gluttonously, past his lips into your waiting mouth. He watched as you gagged on it, and then he let your jaw go so you could close your mouth. You swallowed eagerly, savouring the taste on your tongue. For what did it matter anymore? One day, you’ll be nothing but dust. Bronchioles in lungs will mimic roots. Navels will copy trunks. Organs will feed worms. Ribs will fossilise and lips that are kissed will mould back to Mother Nature. It's all you have ever been. Quick. Convenient. Easy to please, eager to help. Waiting lips, wanting cunt. Warm, never warm enough. But he kept you like a butterfly in a glass jar. He let you see freedom but never experience it. Why need it when you had the stretch of him inside you. The feeling of him, heat to heat with your sex.

“You want this, cherub? Wanna be stuffed full of me again?”

“Always wanted it, Joel.” You mumbled into his mouth, sniffing back the last this spurt of tears, hypnotised. His hand wrapped around his cock, the large splay of his palm did nothing to dwarf its size with he jacked himself once, twice, three times to the sight of you. He squeezed the base with hiss, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth after cursing under his bated breath. He was thick, flushed, the tip swollen and leaking, drooling greedily with a rivulet of precum down the underside of his length. He trod a path with his hands down to your breasts, kneading each one between his palms with a pinch before guiding himself back into the mouth of your heat, your cunt swallowing him down to the base. The needy roll of your hips into his showed just how desperate you were. He groaned at the start of the friction between you, and slowly dragged back out of you, moving just as slowly back inside. He repeated this twice, and then he let loose. The motion turned into a needy clash of his hips to yours. Again. Again. Again. Somewhere along the sting of passion and heat, his hand wrapped around your throat, feeling the flex of it as you swallowed under his palm. He bit down into your neck, reaching out from you as his hips slammed erratically. His heavy balls slapping against your ass with each rut forward of his unrelenting. The way he fucked you, was like holding a knife to your throat. It grounded you in the most harrowing way to each of his breaths. His panting in your ear. It swallowed you whole. Mad your legs wrap around his waist and your hips keen up into him.

Your cunt drooled down his shaft, down to the base, down the sensitive skin of his cock. He growled and hissed in your ear, teeth closing around your earlobe, his hand dragging back up and grip tightening around your neck. Getting off on the feeling of your pulse under his thumb.

You felt the knot tighten. And tighten. Right in the pit of your stomach, deep in your sopping wet cunt where the mouth of your cervix met his fucking. The walls of your cunt sucking him back in as the angle of his hips snapped up into the spot that had you seeing entire constellations. They darted to and fro across your vision. It blurred the edge, spots of dark matter, deep black, the colour of oblivion slinging over the back of your eyes that now burned with tears of pleasure. His fingers dug deeper into malleable flesh, gripped tightly at your hip with his free hand, thumb brushing over your hip bone down your mound to toy with your clit after a slap to it. And it was the action that sent you spiralling, babbling his name nonsensically among a string of curse words. So pretty and fucked out beneath him. Joel couldn’t help but stare smugly as your eyes rolled back into your head when your orgasm hit like a freight train. He came undone soon after, his climax hitting a crescendo with a growl bitten into your shoulder, bruising and brandishing you with his mark again.

He pulled back, leaving you to the mercy of the cold. Watching was his hips moved again to fuck his release back into you. Your hole quivered in protest, and you squirmed under him. “Don’t be fucking ungreatful now, Cherub.” You relented, going still and boneless on the mattress. Limbs unfurling from their tension. “That's it. Take it. Take it all.” He groaned smoothly. Just like the roll of his hips. He fucked it slowly back into you. And you took his release inside you to keep. “Good girl, Cherub.” He whispered, kissing your lips in a tender dichotomy. Not letting you rest until he was satisfied you took every drop of him. Afterall, it was all you’d have left of him until he next chose to pick you up. All the while, he trailed his tongue back down to your breasts, pressing the flat of it to your nipple, drawing it with a sharp suck into his mouth. Pressing the blunt of his teeth into your flesh. Letting the taste melt on his tongue. Salty with your sweat. He did the same to the others. When he went soft inside of you, and his hips stilled. He slipped out of you with hitched breath, the pad of his fingertips tracing your abused, used sex. Your legs twitching when he rolled your clit under two fingers. “I said stop squirming.” He grunted, landing another slap to your pussy. It made an obscene wet sound. His come dribbling out slowly.

“Open your mouth.” Joel commanded, and you did. Waiting for whatever he had planned. He licked a hot strip from your asshole to your cunt, pressing his tongue in to drag out some of his release. And he climbed back up to spit it into your mouth. A hand clamping down on your jaw. “Don’t swallow. Close your mouth.” And you did with the side of his thumb clamping it shut for you. “Taste that?” You nodded in response. It was hot, heavy and thick and salty to taste. Divine. “Show me.” You opened again, his creamy spend diluted amongst your saliva and he smirked. Clamping your jaw shut again. “Swallow.”

Joel watched in open mouthed amusement as the delicate column of your throat rippled under muscle contract. “Good girl, Cherub. Remember that taste next time y’feel like leaving again.” He warned in a growl. And you nodded, swallowing your pride. Your fear. Your mania aiding in shoving it down your throat to dissolve in acid. Once again you were in those deep dark woods. The one where the wolf lay. Remnants of you in his teeth. The willow is still weeping, slashed in half. The axe free of his bloodshed by the entrance of his den. The owls' eyes still lit the scene of sin where overhead the starlight was snuffed out by the tangle of branches thick in their black greenery.

You never got your money back. Maybe one day you'd get out of this town. But the devil has a funny habit of making you want your own suffering. Even angels can’t resist a slice of that heaven. Fallen angel. Wounded bitch. Cherub.

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