#it doesn't work not really just makes it worse cus now he has to try to control his breathing and cry and he's just a mess

[toomanywordsnllines]

Being a little angsty here but...

Thinking about how Soap probably uses rain to cry and hide his tears, it's not like anyone can see the difference. And during rainy days everyone is inside so...

I gave myself emotional damage thinking about this so... I shall share it too! :'D

[silvery-orchid]

Neuvillette comes off as so charming and subtly manipulative, i think it’s a guarantee that he would win over any in-laws easily.

Imagine Neuvillette slowly developing an obsession with you, but instead of framing you or approaching you directly, he has a few ‘run ins’ with your parents. Helping them with issues that suddenly weren’t there in the past, financial problems, a waning reputation made worse by certain rumors. He really does present himself as the perfect son-in-law. He makes your entire family reliant on him so when the time comes you’ll have no choice but to accept him with the eager approval of everybody around you and the financial pressure building up.

OMG OMG OMGG THIS IS SO TRUE LISTEN.

Imagine you first meet this man in like a vegetable or fruits market (doesn't matter if it is modern au or not) and YOU HATE HIS ASS cus you have been looking at those oranges and apples for hours now and want the best ones and when you come neuvillette is there at the same time AND HE JUST CONVENIENTLY WANTS THOSE.

Que you arguing with him without knowing who he even is and since you had a bad day at work you make it everyone's problem. Then he starts trying to seek you out and ??? Your boss has been put in jail over tax evasion?? Odd but good for you. Wait your division is being relocated? WHY IS THE FRUIT THIEF YOUR NEW BOSS??

Neuvillette tries to get on your good side but it often fails so he changes his tactic to inserting himself in your circles without you knowing. Your parents happen to adore the man they met at the opera last time and wow ..well, well, well, wont you look at him IN YOUR DOORWAY WITH ORANGES AS ONE OF THE THINGS HE BROUGHT TO DINNER. If he touches your elbow with his one more time you will stab his hand or so Lord help you.

Except he will eventually make your entire family rely on him and ask that you become his spouse as a trade off. It seems fair you see. And then when you live in his villa he brings you those oranges all the time that you begin to hate them and try to hit him with their peels when he isnt looking to sustain your sanity.

[theadventurek9]

Ryker everytime he sees a dog. Freezes and stands on tippy toes, or does the hunch stare if they are walking closer.

Ryker is the most difficult dog I have owned when it comes to his struggles with disengaging from other dogs. He doesn't bark, only sometimes whines, pulls or lunges. yet he just freezes and has a hard time breaking the stare.

Not the most difficult dog I have worked with, but for a dog with higher food drive. It's interesting (and I'll admit frustrating) how much he struggles with this and spent so many months of no improvement. I've had dogs with a lot lower food drive improve quicker than he has.

He has improved a lot recently, so it makes me look back to see the progress. He went through a phase where he couldn't eat food and would stare for 15+ minutes after where the dog disappeared. Rapidly spinning around, knocking my knees out from underneath me, walking into walls and off ledges to keep staring.

Now he is able to spot a dog and immediately disengage if cued. The automatic disengage is still very hard for him to pass other dogs. He can do it if it is obvious we are not going to pass by with close proximity. He can handle being off leash around other dogs without going up to them as long as they are not within 15 feet and moving straight towards him, then he will break.

Yet passing dogs on a sidewalk is still very hard for him to break the stare. I've shifted into a magnet hand instead of trying to get a disengage because he just can't right now. Over the past few weeks he has gotten really good at magnet hand and can now stay on it while passing close by another dog. Still cannot handle being left to his own choices.

I think it's wild how he is as a dog interacting with other dogs (can play or be neutral depending on what the other dog wants). He has fantastic social skills off leash, better than Aayla for sure. Yet on a leash the frustration and teenage arousal issues come on full force, worse than Aayla ever was. Aayla was walking through a massive grooming competition and trade show at 9 months old and sitting at breweries from 6 months on. I have not dared with Ryker. Dog shows where he is constantly surrounded by other dogs, he is great. But in a crowded place where he might see an occasional dog? He can't handle it.

A lot of this is just teenage intact boy issues. I know that but I've just been surprised how slowly he has taken to training and habitualizing being around dogs he can't interact with. I've seen so many client dogs in inexperienced hands improve faster than he has. Dogs with higher anxiety or arousal issues than Ryker take to training faster.

I've struggled with my pride and ego with this. I know that is a component. It just comes down to that Ryker is a difficult dog in many ways. I was prepared for difficult but not in the ways he has presented in.

The past two weeks have been such a breath of fresh air. He is definitely hitting some maturity and his confidence has boomed. His ability to handle being around dogs has finally started improving again instead of the plateau we were on. Training sessions are great back to back. Actually haven't had him shut down in over 3 weeks now. No signs of avoidance in 2 weeks with almost daily training sessions. A few insecure moments but they have been easy to bring him back from.

I'm starting to see that a lot of these issues are his teenage emotions and baby brain. Which makes me want to cry cause I was so concerned that maybe he would be very insecure in training for life. He will probably always be sensitive and I will have to keep improving but I won't have to always worry about him shutting down if he doesn't know the right answer.

[oatmealcrisp-freak]

Yuuri Katsuki has Bullied Kid energy.

Yuuri : Don't you dare see me as weak or perceive my vulnerability. Please comfort me and reassure me. I'll be constantly afraid of your reaction if I inconvenience you. Nothing scares me more than the people I trust lying to me. I'm more competent and at home in the face of people's scorn than in the face of their genuine love for me. The idea that anyone could see me as desirable is baffling. The world sees me as little more than dirt and I don't disagree with them. I am going to make them eat their teeth with their words or so help me I will set myself on fire trying. Just watch, I am the most beautiful woman in town and you will rue the day you underestimated me. How you like me now?

Victor, thinking he'd been dumped by the first person who'd made him happy in a very long time : I see this, I respect this, I am going to use the hell out of this. Hey. Hey fatty. Watch me pry the thing you love and use to cope with your feelings right out of your fingers until you lose weight. kinda reminiscent of what you did to me :) kinda sorta you know just a lil bit. You don't know what eros is? Okay, now you're just making fun of me.

Victor, after Yuuri had his katsudon eros realization : ...JFC he actually literally doesn't know. I. Uh. ...Huh. Well. Uhm. Okay. Maybe that means he doesn't get OTHER things too. He. He genuinely doesn't know what he did to me. He probably didn't even do it deliberately. Okay. Okay? Okay. I can work with this. THINK OF THE JUICY SUCCULENT PORK, BABE. ...I can't fkn believe this.

Victor, several episodes later when Yuuri reveals he literally doesn't remember the banquet: ...Well shit. The past year of my life has been a lie and I might be an asshole. Hm.

I've read some fics where after Yuuri's ED gets triggered and he crashes hard Victor looks back at all those early comments and goes 'I didn't mean it that way babe you're hot when you're fat and you weren't even that fat it was just that it could be unsafe for your joints to skate in that condition' and sure okay I get wanting to minimize the blow and Yuuri is adorable AF when he's heavier and i still enjoy those fics for the most part but

I disagree with that fully and completely cus nah, Victor's a petty lil bitch who can be cold and ruthless and isn't afraid to hurt people. Is he also warm and kind and loving and doing his best? Yes. He contains multitudes. But he was absolutely aiming to hurt, because he was hurt.

Yuuri, meanwhile, who's been bullied for a great majority of his childhood but has complete faith in Victor and unwavering confidence in his honesty - especially when that honesty fits his world view - that he has an entire Victor shaped blind spot : Eh? Pfft. He wasn't bullying me, what are you talking about? He was literally telling the truth. :/ I mean really, he was taking care of me.

Victor, falling to the ground and clutching his stomach with a groan because ooouuugghhh guilt-nausea : Y-....Yuuri.....

Yuuri : I mean Yurio can be a bully but that's just how he shows he cares so :3 Nah haha, I've had waaaay worse, trust me, lol

Yurio : ....I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative, one that I have never asked to be a part of?

Victor, convulsing :

I think Yuuri can absolutely pick up on when Victor is being dishonest with him and poking his sharp little fingers into the sore spots, but more on an intuitive level that he doesn't know how to make sense of logically, so he just accepts it and moves on largely without comment a;dlkf he'll probably figure it out like fifteen years down the road when he's older and wiser and one day he squints at his husband and goes "...huh, okay" and then never does anything about it anyway because he loves Victor and forgives him and also Victor's hot when he's being mean so

[theultimatekamehamehavoc]

Naegami Fluff and/or Shenanigans 9

Makoto and Byakuya are the type of people who get sick in drastically different ways. Makoto is the one who gets sick more often via colds and getting his nose all mucus-y while Byakuya rarely gets sick at all. When the heir does though, he's basically down for the count. Like, Byakuya has to stay cooped up in his bed for a couple days before he can recover. It can go longer though depending on how much energy he has to get up and ruin his sleep schedule by continuing to do work despite being sick. Honestly, both of these boys try and get stuff done regardless of if they're sick. Makoto's the type who'd try to do stuff for a friend or would try and still go to some place cus he doesn't wanna let anyone down. Or well, he tries. For instance, say Sayaka, Hina, Leon, Sakura, Mondo, and Yasuhiro (I just picked some of them randomly though one can theorize what they are all doing specifically together or something ehehehe) are all going on a get together some place and they all invited Makoto along. Despite the fact that Makoto is close to getting an actual fever though, he tries to still attend. All his buds send him home immediately though. Last thing they want is Makoto getting worse because he decided to chose the definitely smart option of limping his way to the event like a zombie that just freed it's leg that was previously caught in the confines of a fence. Meanwhile, Byakuya is adamantly work focused. Specifically, Byakuya would try his best to work on some sort of document or paper at 2am even though he should be both recovering from his illness and just asleep in general. Like, c'mon man! The assignment isn't due until 3 weeks from now. Yet, Byakuya consistently pushes on regardless of his condition. He's just REALLY good at taking care of himself. Basically, Byakuya only catches the hard hitters while Makoto gets all the weaker illnesses while avoiding the hard hitting flus and stomach bugs. The two manage this system that their bodies have though. This pattern for them can be detrimental for them if they both get sick though. Like, both are simultaneously telling the other to get some rest while also trying to get up themselves to do shit they are way too weak to do in this state. Ah, the hypocrites. That's not to say that they CAN'T get stuff done while they're both ill. It's just a bit of a shitshow for both of them though. Byakuya's complaining the whole time (tho, when ISN'T he hahah funny joke) cus he just HATES being super ill and unproductive. Like, the heir feels like he could be doing so many other things but his body is betraying him. He also just barely rests so being forced to makes him feel like he's lazy. Meanwhile, Makoto's more able and capable to do stuff in his state of sickness but he's still sick so he's way more prone to making minor mistakes and errors. Like, while trying to make soup for the both of them, he accidently puts too much salt in or accidently makes it too sweet by mistaking the sugar as salt instead. So yeah. Just a whole lotta sucky stuff. Everything gets much better once either one of them fully recovers or the both do. Byakuya's still gonna be complaining about the whole ordeal and will make fun of his boyfriend a bit for mixing up ingredients like "Tch. Were you actively TRYING to make us feel even WORSE?" sorta talk. Though, he's not THAT pissy about it. Just a little bit. Byakuya is built different and by different, I mean petty. All is well though at the end of the day! Also like, I just HAD to draw this. Like, a primal desire cus it's so goofy but also poor Byakuya is in the pains. He's not doing good at all. Think his tummy hurt. Poor guy. What a way to go T-T

[artistcaptainbendy]

I see that you have alot of Captain Underpants aus, so if you don't mind, can you tell me about all of them and the differences between them and canon.

Hey sorry for taking a while to reply.

I can't really remember everything AU I made but I'll try my best.

Let's start with what I think was the first one, smartypants Au. It's basically what happens when instead of the boys making krupp, the captain, it was Melvin. Of course the biggest difference here is that krupp is the silly one and the captain is the smart one. Melvin was tried of how dumb krupp was and so taught him a lot of info to try and make him smart (by editing the boys comics), when that didn't work he hypothesis him and made him captain smartypants. Now at first I was going to have SP!Krupp's chaotic nature just be something he does, but later on I decided to have it be his part cosmic chaos demon because it sounds funny, so now he has a reason to be chaotic he needs it to live. Now I believe almost everything I've drawn is technically Canon, sp can travel to other Aus and interact with other krupps so stuff like that happens.

Now let's go to Bendypants au. Just what happens when I take a horror game and blend it with the CU universe. George and Harold being joey and Henry, Melvin is sammy, krupp is boris, edith is Alice, of the star of the show himself! Captain underpants is bendy. Now some relationships I had to change for the characters but the story is basically the same. Now what I say isn't Canon is of course any of the funny side things I draw like them celebrating holidays together or when they all went to space or anything that happens with Beetlejuice. Its more of its own side au where it's the same characters but different vibes. AU BP is different from persona BP with is me even if I use some of the same story beats. Now I'm realizing I've drawn more things for the silly side au then the official one hahaha.

Side timeline au time. Criminal SP krupp, if what happened to sp in high school made him a worse person instead of better and he became a Criminal. He uses his chaotic powers to steal and rob places, one day after saving two teens, they wanted to join him. At first he wanted nothing to do with them but after a while he finally let them be his crew. Now I haven't drawn much for this one but most of it is Canon. Even the silly.

Imaginary friend AU. Again not much drawn for this one so all is Canon. But it's what if the OG, PP, and SP captains were Imaginary friends to their krupps who are kids. I still have no explanation as to how there are three krupps but eh.

Sp jekyll and hyde AU. Same story as the play version but with some changes, so I guess not that similar. But instead of murder it's pranks, and smarty doesn't cheat on edith. George and Harold are two orphans who hyde SP took and smarty decided to adopt. Now I'm not sure what to have not Canon so that's up in the air.

Vampire SP. Gosh there are lot of sp krupps. Ok it's sp but Vampire and smarty is his twin brother who somehow is a werewolf. Sp doesn't want to drink blood but has to so he doesn't go crazy, so his former caretaker works at a blood bank and sneaks him some "food". He had a girlfriend 100s of years ago and now has found a woman who looks a lot like her, this being Edtih. Hmm everything Canon, even when helped fight Beetlejuice.

And lastly (because I might of forgotten the other aus I might have) is the lumberjack Au! Krupp is a lumberjack......that is all (jk). His a lumberjack that lives in the woods in a small cabin, people thought he was some odd creature till the boys found him and saw he was just a lumberjack who might have been in the woods for too long. They befriend him and now once in while hang out with him. Now this more of a cozy au nothing too crazy happens in it, there might be sometimes when it does, like when krupp upsets the sprite of the woods, but hey who doesn't do that. Not much art for it yet but mostly all Canon, and the side horror thing with him as the protagonist is separated. But I'll leave you with a fun fact.....in this universe lumberjack krupp's parents are actually the smartest people in the world, like world class scientists levels, and he doesn't like talking about them and hopes no one realizes his their son.

What? I can't make a krupp who doesn't have issues it's impossible! Make a character who's just happy with life and has no worries ? Never!

[kittygamer2888]

!LONG POST WARNING!

Y'know what? Screw this.

*ties you on a chair and makes you look at a chalkboard*

Imma just explain a few things about Sarah because I'm kinda getting tired of keepin' it subtle, so, here it goes. *tap tap on chalkboard with chalk*

Transformations can be really, and I mean, REALLY painful sometimes, even for Sarah.

Whenever Sarah transformed (into.. erh.. some sorta beast.??) It would hurt her really bad and would only overwhelm her much more than recently, but that was only when she was still young. Sarah's transformation isn't exactly a curse per se, but uh... it's actually her powers, but due to the events that happened when she was little and didn't know how to controll this transformation of her's properly, this would make her dangerous and act hostile. But it wasn't just 'cus she wasn't in controll of her transformation, oh no no no, this is... uh.. much more deeper than you think. You see, whenever Sarah feels an overwhelming amount of stress or feel as though she's in danger, that's when her transformation spikes up and ruins everything. This is also the same case for when she's in danger or feels cornered, so.. you could say that this transformation is like a dangerous defense mechanism that Sarah doesn't have control over, and because of this, she has a hard time accepting these powers of hers.

Because like.. she doesn't remember what even happens after her transformation, all she knows is blood and destruction once she wakes up, she didn't mean to do the things she did, everything around her would just be total chaos and she wouldn't even know what happened until she eventually starts remembering little snippets of what had actually happened. This right here, this, ALL OF THIS. She has been dealing with this ever since her owner passed away, so she had to bear the pain of living alone and endlessly killing others unintentionally. One thing to also note is that whenever she starts to feel as though her powers are activating, her emotions increase as she starts to hyperventilate, and let's just say that that's... not a good feeling to have if I'm being real with you.

So one fateful day, she enters a city and uhhhh... lots of stuff happen, she didn't know where she was going and ended up being in a bad place at the wrong time, making her turn into a monster again aaaaaand killing many innocents in the city without her knowing... a g a i n.

So after reverting back and passing out due to the police being there and shooting a tranquilizer, she went to ✨️jail✨️

Though, while everyone in the city was horrified by what she did, there was one animal that saw through her and that wild panick that she had made.

And it was ✨️Benjamin✨️

This lil' guy right here used to work in therapy until he eventually retired, so.. you could say that he's a therapy dog, and he was there when the little incident had happened. This incident didn't feel like a threatening one, at least not for Benji here, no no- he actually saw the amount of stress and panic Sarah was feeling, he saw how panicked and nervous the onslaught was with Sarah and the hostility that she was inflicting, it almost looked like she was in distress for Benjamin here. There was something Benji thought was odd, so, guess what he did? He bailed Sarah out and made an agreement with the government in the city for him, Benjamin, to look after Sarah and to make sure incidents like this doesn't happen ever again. If Sarah was to ever transform and attack the city 3 times, she would be locked up somewhere far worse than prison. This wouldn't stop the cops taking action every now and then though, because, even if Benjamin was looking after Sarah, any sudden action she'd make that involved anything with her transforming would sometimes lead to the cops noticing and sometimes take action, but Benjamin however, would try to calm Sarah down whenever that'd be the case

The poor guy had to talk to multiple policemen, saying that he's got it all under control and how they wouldn't need to take action.

Though, because of this, the citizens of the city would start to hate Sarah because of how she could just get away with it that easily. Some of the folk in the city would even try to.. how should i put this... pressuring her, almost towards to bullying her because of how she becomes a monster every now and then when her emotions get in the way, and because of this, Benjamin would always try to protect Sarah from these bullys so she wouldn't transform. Sadly, due to all of the hatred towards her, this would only make Sarah hate her powers and even just herself in general, making her feel insecure about herself even. Everyone looked so normal in the city... she wished she could be like them and not whatever the hell she has going on. Luckily, Benjamin's always there to cheer her up at times, cus after all, that's what friends are for! And even then, Sarah wouldn't hurt Benjamin either, because they're both friends!

..Right?

AHEM

Anywho *yeets chalk away*

That's all I gotta say for now, you're now able to be released! *unties ropes* you.. you can go now..

Shoo

Now if you'll excuse me

If you made it this far then i... I'm surprised you actually cared to read the entire thing, or even look at it for that matter--

Imma go cry in a corner now👍

[my-reality-my-rules]

hii , so

i have a bf in my cr …but, my relationship isnt that great ( he is very toxic sometimes ). im going to get a bit personal, so u can understand (: at the time i discovered reality shifting, which was 2 years ago , it was ALSO the year i got close with my current bf. i was very close to shifting, but i chose to enter in a relationship w him and NOT shift ( nd of course that left me really sad , cus i had a connection and still have with that dr ). but, summimg up , he was very abusive and he kindof cheated on me 3 times . after that, we took a break and i found another person who was also really toxic . then it didnt work out , n i tried shfiting again, with another dr, got really close, and then i decided to leave it to resume my relationship with that person who i took a break and is now my current bf.

i know this is like … im dumb , cus he cheated but i like him REALLY much. n thats the problem , i think that this is making it difficult for me to detach from my cr. i am not happy in my relationship , so i decided to get back AGAIN at shifting. and i pretend to have a s/o in that dr , so i dont know if i should do something about my cr situation ??? cus its blocking me from going to my dr ( im not sure about that and thats why im asking ) and also , i dont know if its considered ""cheating "" ??

i mean , that is very confusing but i do hope u understand and hopefully answer my question ಥ‿ಥ …

[thanks for this ask!]

first things first, I'd like to apologise for taking this long to answer your message. i know the topic you mentioned can be sensitive, and, in a sense, urgent. now, I'm not the best person to ask questions to when it comes to relationships, but i can try giving you some general advice.

- - -

let's divide your message into parts. from what I've read, i can sort it into two topics: the CR S/O issue (and how it affected your progress with shifting), having a DR S/O.

with the CR issue, what i can tell you is this: i hope that you were able to sort things out with him, because what he did simply wasn't right. your own feelings wouldn't matter if he cheated on you anyway. it's a tough truth to learn—but the fact that he did it alone signifies that he isn't trustworthy. of course, you could take all the time you want as a break and refrain from shifting when you dealt with this issue—but just know that it shouldn't hold you back from actually shifting itself.

apologies if this question is a bit sensitive; would you call it a trauma response, pretending to have an S/O in your DR? and in doing so, does it make you feel more fulfilled or content?

you don't have to pretend you have an S/O there, because you can simply script someone in.

as a general rule of thumb—no, shifting to be with another person isn't cheating. it's a bit tricky to discuss, but the gist is that the DR individual is in another reality, and doesn't necessarily count as cheating in the conventional form. in my opinion, though, i don't think of it that way, so long as (if you're still in the relationship in your CR) your partner knows and understands what you're doing.

and my answer is yes; yes, do something about the CR situation. i can't tell you exactly what it is that you can act upon. but if you leave it to fester, you might end up making things worse for yourself. no matter that you have feelings for your boyfriend, he's committed an act of wrong against you, and you're not obligated to remain with him. him being a source of your affections doesn't mean he has the right to it, especially when he's already done something to abuse those affections.

if you feel as if this held you back from shifting, then yes, try to sort it out first.

[tidbitsandbats]

(pt3) Once again, chapter three wasn't originally going to exist. Or, if it was, it was going to be a mini scene inserted at the end of the second chapter.

Obviously, it did not stay that way.

I just liked the more mellow comedown, the slow process of reconciling the blurry whirl of sensations into his conscious mind and acknowledging what had happened to him.

I also wanted to explore more of what I'd touched on in the second chapter:

"Dick had told him about the forced heat, quiet as his brother refused to look at him, face buried in his knees while he spoke; a warning and confession all in one. Begging wordlessly for reassurance that it hadn’t been his fault, that he couldn’t have stopped his body’s reactions. 

He’d talked about the heavy lethargy of forced submission, the persistent burn of arousal and fever. 

The drugs that had stolen away his ability to fight back. That had made parts of him want it. "

I recognized that there was so much potential in watching Dick react to what had happened to Jason, his guilt over not having been able to stop it, the realization that he could have, technically, prevented it from happening if he'd done what Ra's wanted in the first place.

His careful repression to keep from making things worse by getting wrapped up in his own issues while Jason needed comfort. Careful to make sure that everything was an offer rather than a demand, always ensuring that Jason knew he could say "No" and that Dick would respect it. Giving Jason back some semblance of control after having had none.

Dick has experienced going through that situation, and he's also cued into his omega side in a way that Jason just isn't. He's learned how to alleviate the cramps that Jason would just put up and shut up about, for example. Dick is the aunt who tells you what brand of pads is the best and why you don't fall asleep with a tampon in. He had the Plan-B ready as soon as Jason woke up. He's got this shit locked in.

Jason is a lot more pessimistic than Dick is, as a rule. He didn't expect anyone to come and save him, he doesn't believe that they can keep Ra's away.

But he's trying, he's growing and recognizing that, even if they can't protect him, he might be able to trust his pack to at least comfort him in the aftermath. He wants to believe that they can manage that.

I also, for a brief moment, considered the possibility of future Tim/Dick/Jay in this universe "Tim would bring him books to read, gifting ones that Jason had only briefly thought of getting for himself." hehe I looked at that bit after I wrote it and went "What if? :3" but I don't know if that's actually going to be a thing, regardless now you know about it and can read into that however you want.

I could probably write a whole fic about Dick and Jason being domestic and nesting together, though it would feel really out of place in this series of DD angst LMAO

[20dollarlolita]

Okay, first of all, sorry I've never told followers this before, but never, EVER, pay Joann Fabrics and Crafts with PayPal. It's an absolute crime that neither Joann or PayPal is willing to tell you that they can barely communicate with each other, but they don't. It's been a few years since I was a manager there, but at the time I worked there, refunds from paypal purchases were made in the form of Joann gift cards, because they just couldn't talk to Paypal at all.

When you place a Buy Online Pickup In Store order, a hold on your mode of payment is places for the total cost of the order. When the staff marks the order as pulled, the hold is released and the payment is charged for the actual items that were pulled. This is because it's easier to charge someone less money than the hold than it is to refund money for items that were out of stock. If the whole order is out of stock, the hold should be released in its entirety. Once the hold is released, your bank or credit card has 3 days to process the released hold. I believe that 3 days is a federal law, but someone can fact check me on that if you want. The thing about PayPal is that they don't actually have to obey that law. PayPal's terms of service allow them to hold whatever they want from you for whatever reason or just because they're bored. They once held $600 of mine for 3 months because my neighbor moved in and he was a felon. PayPal has different rules from a normal bank. Paypal also once had my account locked for over a month and every 10 days I had to call them and ask why it wasn't unlocked, only for them to tell me it was unlocked except that it wasn't unlocked.

Joann freight from the main trucks is never actually checked into the store inventory. They have a list of what was on the truck, and when the truck is marked as arriving at the store, the items go into the inventory. This wasn't as shitty of a system when they didn't do Bopis or Ship from Store, because people can't buy what's not on the shelves, so having 160 garlands in a box in the stock room doesn't impact in-store customers as long as there's 5 out on the actual shelf. But it does impact online customers who order 80 garlands and are then told that they can only fill the order with 5 of them. This system was bad when I started working there in 2016 and it's only gotten worse as the company has continued to keep cutting hours and expecting the workers to just work harder (for minimum wage) to make up for it. But this system also means that if a box arrives damaged or the wrong box gets sent to a store or if a box got left on a loading dock in Ohio or something, the store inventory doesn't know.

Remember how I said staff cuts? Well, here's another fun one: the bopus system counted how many orders we canceled, but not how many items were in a canceled order. This meant that, when we had corporate demanding to know why we weren't filling more orders, we'd see really long orders and just cancel the whole thing so that we could get to doing the smaller orders faster and getting our numbers up. This was really garbage, but because of the restrictions that we had coming from corporate, it was the only way to get the numbers they wanted and avoid getting into trouble. I assume that the warehouses operate on a similar "we made up numbers that you have to reach and now you reach those numbers by doing things not how we want you to," because I used to get giant cartons with 1-2 items in them. I'm assuming corporate is tracking how many cartons get packed in a certain amount of time, but aren't tracking how many items get into the cartons.

In other "corporate didn't want it to work like this but it absolutely worked like this," on those surveys on the receipts, the 0-10 system was a lie. It actually read that 10 was a success, 9-5 was a failure, and 4 and below was a zero. This meant that if someone was being shitty, and I pegged them at wanting to leave a lower-scored survey, I'd stop trying to recover any customer service points and would just try to get them out of there. If you're going to give me a zero by giving me a 4, then I'm going to just shovel you out the store as fast as I could so that I could hopefully get someone who was going to do the survey and give me a 10. Also corporate did care about the time that a customer threw a roll of quarters at my head, but not for my own safety, just to lecture me on why I got a zero on that transaction. So yeah, throw a 220gram piece of metal at my head and then let me get yelled at for not making you happy because I couldn't materialize garlands out of my asshole.

So yeah, based on how things were heading when I left, it's tracking that things are now this bad. I can't actually go into the store I used to work in, because they don't pay hours to do freight before the store opens. So instead, cut counter and register employees are expected to do their jobs, also fill buy online and ship from store orders, and do freight, for the same amount of pay and in the same amount of time. This meant that boxes of freight were being left everywhere, since the employee doing that freight was only given 4 hours and was also doing three other jobs at that time. This meant that I can't actually shop with the people I really like and care about, because their unattended freight boxes have made the entire store wheelchair-inaccessible.

It's amazing how different working there looks after I started working at a place that's at least well-staffed and not being judged exclusively by somewhat arbitrary number goals. My current job has a whole host of nightmares, but at least "good customer service" is based on things other than horribly biased surveys.

Just a heads up, something really messed up is going on with Joann (fabric/craft store) and I highly recommend you don’t order online from them. Multiple people, including myself, have placed orders, had the entire thing or most of the order canceled by the store the same day while claiming the items aren’t in stock. However, they will hold the amount of your order for a month, in PayPal’s case, and not actually cancel it. I have called, emailed, and texted all of their customer service lines and only got one text in response that was just… a lie?

Obviously, they should not be allowing people to order stuff that supposedly isn’t in stock to begin with, but they should also actually cancel the order and not let a chunk of your money sit in limbo or never refund it.

Additionally, the twenty something items I ordered (to make a gift for a friend and for some Patreon stuff) were all very different things and there’s no reasonable way every single item was out of stock. And then they lied and said it was a payment issue:

When I spoke to both my bank and PayPal they said everything is up to date and perfectly functioning.

I honestly can’t tell you what, exactly is going on. But something is. And it’s bs. And I would highly recommend you find another source for crafting supplies if you can.

[lifewiththelulus]

part 1

Trying to think of scenario where Atlantis and Match meet but failing.

Maybe she goes to a show to support her friends and sees him play lol Cus he plays drums right?

Yeah! It could also be Vapor's first singing performance with Bog and Match. That could be the main reason she's here.

Omg yes!! She's very intrigued by him when she sees how wild he is I imagine them to be opposites lol

She's very laid back about everything

Well except for her little accident and her boyfriend dumping her over it but that's something I'm still working on,,,

Match is definitely a wildcard and loves to cause chaos, think male Nimona

They're gonna be very interesting friends lol

He's not above breaking his instruments on stage XD

She's never feared anyone before him XD She sees him as the definition of "don't let them know your next move"

Aw but like Imagine her being super chill and her and match get left kinda just standing there while the rest of them start talking about going to get some food and celebrate a great first show She's just quiet and chill as usual waiting for the others to pick a place to go

Match, would shout out the place he wants to go and will try to sell them on it until they cave in. Also he might notice the way she always looks a bit sick when she looks at Bog.

At first she probably finds him to be a little annoying and loud but as the night goes on she finds herself snorting and laughing at some of the stuff he says lol

She tries to avoid sitting next to Bog or really just being close to him She's probably still hung up on him at least a tiny bit, even though she says it's cool and they can be just friends. She would never try anything with him again, but thinking of what could've been still makes her a little sad

Match probably thinks she's a bit of a stick in the mud at first, but once he realizes she has a sense of humor that maybe she could be fun. (btw is this before or after her oopise at prom?)

I'd say maybe after? But she hasn't told anyone except Kindlin and Cirrus

Idk if you wanna have Bog know cus I know you said he overhears lol

Yeah Bog probably wouldn't know yet.

ok. She probably hasn't broken up with her bf at this point since he doesn't know yet

They got along cus they were both chill but as soon as she brings up the oopsie he's getting the fuck outta dodge He's probably the type to say he'll do something then fall through and have some lame excuse Very chill and friendly until it inconveniences him. I'm thinking He's the reason Lily finds out

And of course Lily goes crying to her Dad "I'm just SO worried about her! She dated this earth guy in secret and now she's gonna have a baby! Poor cousin Atty is messing up her life! We need to tell Uncle!"

Of course Atlantis' Dad finds out and they get into a huge fight He's more worried about public opinion of her being a single teen Mom with a mixed element baby than he is about her well-being and gives her a week to figure something out. But we'll get to that eventually >:)

What is after Atlantis learns that jerk BF has fled, she goes into a depressive state. She goes to Garden of Fabric to pick her supplies and Match's mom's are concerned for their best customer. Match is there helping his moms and he's all "Hey I know you, miss doom and gloom! …Wow you look even worse than before."

Omfg I totally forgot they ran a fabric shop and she does fashion XD

after a bit of bickering he offers her to hang during his special nights out.

Lol She's just like "Wow thanks you sure are a charmer."

Lol I can see her being a peachy lil thing with his moms and as soon as he shows his face she just frowns expecting another cheery insult

lol Match always says the first thing on his mind, not realizing what he says might be rude.

She always thinks heavily about what she says before she says it lol It comes with the territory of going to business parties with her dad and not embarrassing him ever again like she did once

She probably comes by so much that after a while she's expecting to see him there One time she goes in and he's not there and she's slightly disappointed they won't have their daily "argument"

aww bicker buddies ^^

Imagine her going up there one day and instead of asking for fabric she's kind of desperately asking for a job She even mentions she knows where they keep everything already and can answer most questions if a customer asks. She's not proud of asking but every other place she tried didn't want a teen with no experience or didn't have an open spot

They would flip with joy to have her work there. (They also can see signs of her pregnancy so they make sure to give her the jobs that aren't too strenuous.)

She literally never cries but then saying yes made her have a break down of relief as soon as she was out of eyesight

She probably still doesn't tell them, and doesn't realize they know lol She's trying to keep it hidden until it's unavoidable

He doesn't stay there for long, he's usually visits once a day to see if his moms needs anything, otherwise, he's out with other friends and or practicing his drumming. Though he might take up a job when he learns she'll be working there. XD

So I'm thinking once she has the job she probably gets her own apartment close by. She probably spends her breaks sitting in the storage room making baby onesies and blankets If she can't buy things then dammit she's gonna make em

Once eventually everyone know about it, Match delivers some fabric and says his moms insisted she take them. She later learns Match payed for those for her not the moms

[hi-my-name-is-cosmopathy]

Hi guys I just wanted to share something with y'allI

idid say this before but I deleted the post but I have plans for creating TTTE Fan Episodes and I just wanna share you one

( @just-a-douglas-simp-existing come take a look at this)

It's actually abt Donald and Douglas. The episode is about them getting nightmares of losing each other. Donald gets a nightmare that he never confronted the spiteful brakevan and Douglas topples over the frickin hill, falling down and dies. And for Douglas, he gets a nightmare that he performed poorly and is going to be sent back, but Donald sacrifices himself takes his place for scrap.

It's implied that they ignored it at first but CLEARLY that isn't doing anything. So, they try to take initiative. Donald tries to stay closer to Douglas and watch over him, and Douglas tries to stray away from Donald and do his jobs for him. Yeah you can see how this doesn't end well. And it goes on for a week or so. The engines already thought it was suspicious enough that Douglas didn't wanna work with Donald but they assumed it was bcus they had some fight or whatever.

Anyway the problem gets worse when snow comes around and they have to work separately. Yeah and no shet there was a blizzard and Donald has an accident and gets lost in the fookin snow. And now Douglas is worried as shet and regrets all his decisions..Well obviously Donald is saved and the twins have a heart to heart moment at the steamworks and they're finally telling each other EVERYTHING. Then it's like— the first time the twins cry in years. Bill, Ben and the Fat Controller just look and the clay twins just look at TFC and say "Sir, I think you need to do what you must," "what is it?" "bring them to therapy."

and he does. There may be a few hiccups but the twins are slowly being more honest with each other now :⟩

I made this episode for different reasons. First of all, most of the episodes Mattel and HiT gives us Abt the twins is them fighting and fighTING aND FIGHTING GOSH ITS SO BORING AND UNENTERTAINING!! ITS THE SAME THING EVERY EPISODE GIVE US SOMETHING NEW— so I did.

Second of all, self projection. It's not quite often but there are times where I regret not being and older sibling to my siblings and there are things I wished I didn't do to them. So now I'm the responsible one out of them. But, when it's comes to schoolwork, I think my sister is just plain out annoyed with me cus sometimes it's like she does all the homework for me and I just...follow. I feel the to become independent from her. I could talk to her Abt this cus sometimes she just gives me the answers even when I don't ask for it, but I'm too ashamed of myself. This doesn't really happen anymore but I still feel guilty.

Now, last of all, it's because of the thing that made Donald and Douglas special to me. You see, in most media, identical twins are utilized for fun comedy and shenanigans. They're like, the jokesters of the group. But then there's these two. While Awdry was writing them, instead of making a story about two, silly and mischievous twins and there shenanigans, it's about hard-working, no-nonsense twins who enjoy mischief at times, but would do ANYTHING to keep the other alive, even if it means DYING. It's a fresh new breath of air for someone like me (i have a twin).

So yeah I mixed this shet up and got "Lost In A Blizzard".

Okie thas all leave your thoughts in reblogs

[jaedreaminn]

Final Part

Characters: Taeyong, Ten, Mark, Jeno, Heachan.

Theme: Family bonding, humour, crack, fluff,angst, happy ending.

Parings: «mentioned» someone x Haechan, someone x Ten.

Words: 2.3k

~~~

"You're the first one here" Ten smiled at Jeno who had just walked into the bar.

"I've always been on time and you know that" Jeno smiled sliding into the booth, sitting next to Ten.

"God knows who you got that good habit from because no one in our family is on time unless it's absolutely necessary" Ten teased and Jeno's eyes disappeared into half moons. "And from what I remember you were always late to school."

"I wasn't late hyung I skipped school" Jeno deadpanned and Ten cringed, "Yea the Jeno delinquent phase was definitely.... interesting"

"Ahh I miss those times because atleast my friends-" "Can you even call those people friends?" Ten interrupted and Jeno glared at him, so he simply mouthed an apology and went back to sipping his water as Jeno continued to speak, "Atleast my friends then were scared of me so they never said anything. Now if I'm late I have to deal with an angry Renjun and his wrath is the scariest thing on this planet." Ten cringed silently at the mention of the smaller boy as he remembered experiencing Renjuns anger first hand and it wasn't pretty.

"Thank God for that though, otherwise I would be sitting here alone on my bachelor party"

"True that" Jeno said lifting his glass of water and clicking it with Tens glass.

"How boring, you guys are only drinking water" Donghyuck said as a form of greeting sliding into the booth, sitting on the other side of Ten.

"I'm waiting for everyone to arrive before ordering the food and drinks" Ten said rolling his eyes and then flicked Donghyucks arm, "And I wouldn't have to wait so long if you were on time"

"Ow!" Donghyuck whined rubbing his arm as Jeno chuckled.

"So how are things going for the two of you" Jeno asked eyes grinning mischievously as Donghyuck sighed and dreamy sigh, "Better, I think I want to make it official soon"

"About time!" came Taeyongs voice and all three of them looked up to see him walking towards the table.

"How did you even hear what Hyuck was saying from so far away" Jeno asked and Ten chuckled when Taeyongs face scrunched up in judgment as he took of his coat, "I raised you people, I just know"

"That doesn't make sense" Haechan frowned and Taeyong glared at him as he folded his coat and sat down.

"I've been raising you since I was thirteen I would be damned if you doubted my super hearing"

"Fine fine Whatever you say" Haechan lifted his hands up in surrender and Taeyong grinned scanning the table, "Where's Mark?"

"He isn't here yet" Ten said and Taeyong frowned.

"You're telling me these two have been here before Mark?" Taeyong asked pointing at the two youngest at the table earning protests from both.

"Yep" Ten said popping the 'p'.

"But dont worry he should be here soon" He added, reassuring Taeyong.

"Right, we're here to celebrate you getting married" Taeyong cheered changing the topic and Ten grinned like a fool in love.

"Yeah I can't believe the wedding is so close" He said smiling excitedly.

"About time you two have been engaged forever" Jeno scoffed but the smile on his face showed how happy he was for his brother.

"I know we're basically married" Ten chuckled as the others cheers'd to that.

"Ahhh sorry I'm late" Mark said rushing in sitting on the chair opposite Ten.

"What's with all the bags Markie?" Donghyuck asked curiously looking at the the five small paper bags in his hands.

"Well I remembered something from when all of us went camping and I thought now was a good time to do this" Mark said laughing nervously, "But I'm not sure if you guys would really like it now" he said handing everyone a bag.

Ten peeked inside and immediately smiled, "Oh wow I forgot that we wanted to do this" he said pulling out a cap with the words 'The Lee brothers' written in neat cursive.

"Oh yea we wanted matching caps for the five of us because we thought shirts were too tacky" Donghyuck chuckled holding onto his cap as of it was his greatest treasure, while smiling brightly.

"Wow we really love these Mark, can't believe we almost forgot about this" Taeyong chuckled looking at his cap with awe and then his eyes brightened "It even has my name on the back"

"Yea it does and I also almost forgot about this too" Mark smiled brightly as he saw his brothers looking at the caps with smiles on their faces.

"Our family isn't very normal is it?" Jeno smiled and the others nodded.

"To think we were this close to being eachothers worst enemies" Ten laughed and Taeyong frowned, still not able to joke about it.

"Yea that was crappy of me" Taeyong said looking down at his glass of water as he remebered how he treated Ten and Donghyuck.

"I can't believe you still beat yourself up over that hyung you were a kid! You were allowed to feel angry and be defensive and irrational" Donghyuck said grinning brightly and a small sad smile graced Taeyongs face because a smile from Hyuck was contagious, "And at the end of the day you came around and now we've got such a strong bond. And you did a lovely job as an older brother I mean look at how I turned out" Donghyuck smiled proudly.

"I thought we were making him feel better not worse. You turned out to be a pain in the ass" Jeno said with a playful smile on his face and Donghyuck pretended to be shot, looking at Jeno in betrayal as Jeno smirked proudly like an evil villan.

"We really need to seperate those two because Jeno has been catching on to Donghyucks dramatic attitude" Ten said watching the two youngest judgingly and Mark just drank (his water) to that.

"Please you're one to talk Ten" Taeyong scoffed rolling his eyes, "You're the one who taught that brat how to be dramatic"

"I object"

"Hyung that's not how it works" Mark sighed, smiling at Ten.

"Ahhh I agree with Taeyong, I am who I am because of Ten" Donghyuck chuckled and shifted away from Ten quickly as the other tried to hit him.

"Ya come here I'll show you dramatic" Ten yelled, trying to attack Haechan who was hiding behind Mark.

"You always hide behind Mark as if Mark would fight for you" Jeno rolled his eyes and Donghyuck stuck out his tongue.

"If I think any of you would attack Mark I wouldn't hide behind him cus he's a weak little baby but I know none of you guys would hurt a hair on Marks head so he's the safest to hide behind"

"He's not wrong" Taeyong shrugged.

"That and Donghyucks favourite is Mark" Ten complained and Donghyuck grinned nodding his head and Mark just sighed trying his best to order drinks for everyone with Donghyuck standing behind him and Ten ready to pounce in their direction at any moment.

"When did he even get so attached?" Jeno asked latching himself onto Tens arm. Ironic.

"Probably the first time Mark spoke during dinner without us having to ask him anything" Taeyong chuckled at the memory and everyone smiled.

"I was so amused that he was an actual person with feelings" Donghyuck perked up from behind Mark who glared at the boy and flicked him on the head.

"I'm not safe anywhere" Donghyuck whined running to Taeyong and dramatically falling onto his lap.

"I was just excited about a song I liked that day and I felt so concious the way all of you looked at me with big eyes" Mark said recalling the memory with a frown.

"Yea it was a quite dinner that day because Jeno and Hyuck were fighting at it got awkward to talk and suddenly out of the blue YOU, of all people spoke." Taeyong said smiling looking at the two youngest who just stuck their tongues out at eachother at the mention of their 'fight'

"Yeah I remember, they were fighting over something very stupid and they got so excited that Mark had spoken that they completely forgot about their fight" Ten chuckled whole heartedly joined by Taeyong and Mark.

"Now that I remember we left our fight half way I'm not talking to you anymore Jeno" Haechan said, puffing his chest and pouting.

"You're really high maintenance you know" Jeno said coking an eyebrow and Haechan just laughed at that statement, not denying it.

"Yeah you are. You once tried jumping out of the second floor window because someone told you you were to much of a coward to do so" Mark said with a frown, accusingly pointing his finger at their youngest. Jeno wasn't wrong, dealing with Donghyuck wasn't an easy task.

"Oh yea I remember Jeno couldn't stop Hyuck so he ran to Mark's classroom which was closest and then came all the way to the other building to get us" Taeyong said with a lopside smile.

"Ahhhh yess I remember you people scolding me so much and Jeno refused to speak to me the entire day at school and then cried when we got home" Donghyuck chuckled as Jeno blushed.

"I'm sorry I was scared that you were going to die!' Jeno yelled defensively and everyone laughed.

"Mark yelled at me so much and scared everyone in my class and then oh god when Taeyong and Ten walked in angry I almost shat my pants"

"Angry Taeyong is a scary Taeyong" Mark shuddered.

"Even your mother was scared of you angry and you were only thirteen back then" Ten smiled at Taeyong cheekily and the boy just sipped on his drink that arrived a while ago looking elsewhere.

"Well I was pissed that they kept dragging Hyuck into their petty arguments. God I hate that woman so much." Taeyong said, getting angry.

"I feel bad that I haven't invited them to the wedding because at the end of the day they took me in when my parents died but I just hate them so much" Ten frowned and Mark patted his brothers back.

"Dont worry we all hate them, they would have spoilt everyone's mood." Mark said and then scoffed, "Dad's finally given up on trying to persuade me to steal your business" Mark chuckled and Ten smiled at him.

"Yea now he's trying to persuade me." Jeno rolled his eyes and Ten chuckled.

"Like, as it is we have stability because of our shares now he's being greedy again? Didn't his greed ruin our lives enough" Mark said clutching onto his drink angrily.

"The only good thing that came out of his greed was Hyuck" Taeyong said hugging the youngest who just looked sullen.

"I wouldn't say good thing... their fights got worse because of me. I mean I don't blame Mrs. Lee for hating me" Haechan said eyes downcast.

"No don't make excuses for that woman" Jeno growled.

"But I'm the reason her marriage was compromised." Haechan frowned.

"She compromised her own marriage because she was an awful person no one wanted to spend the rest of their life with and she had no right to take it all out on you" Mark said angrily clutching onto his drink.

"No Mark you don't get it, it was only fair to hate me" Haechan said with a frown and Ten and Taeyong looked at eachother with worry, patting the yongers back.

"She had no right to hate you" Mark said getting angrier by the second and Jeno tried to calm his brother down. This always was a sensitive topic.

But Heachan nodded his head in disagreement, "I was born because her husband cheated on her"

"And I was born because she cheated on her husband" Mark yelled and everyone at the table looked at him wide eye'd.

"This is one hell of a bachelor party" Jeno said reaching for his drink, still shocked at what Mark had just said.

"Mark what are you saying..." Taeyong asked, placing a hand on Marks knee as Mark tried his best to avoid evryone gaze.

"I didn't know how to tell you guys but that's why dad stopped bothering me, because he recently found out I'm not his son" Mark said eyes downcast and then scoffed, "So now he's cut all ties with me"

"Oh I'm going to go punch that greedy old bastard" Jeno said with a growl to his tone and his fists clenched.

"Dont waste your time I don't care but it hurt how easy it was for him to drop me and now I hate my mother even more considering she knew about this since I was born but still fought with dad over him cheating and gave Hyuck crap for it" Mark frowned.

"Ugh this is so fucked up" Ten said taking a chug of his drink.

"I'm not a Lee" Mark sniffed, "I'm not your brother"

"Ahhh thats bs we're all brothers" Haechan said hugging Mark from behind.

"Yea and we've been through hell and back together" Ten grinned.

"And we'll always have eachothers backs and there's no easy way for you to get out of being our brother" Jeno said lightly punching Mark on his shoulder.

"I haven't raised you all my life for you to think I'm not your brother" Taeyong smiled and Mark chuckled slightly at that.

"Taeyong you're not their brother you're basically their mother" Ten said and everyone chuckled.

"Yea the constant nagging and the obsession with cleanliness and Febreze" Haechan said with a laugh and everyone chuckled.

"Yea so I don't know why you thought anything would change Mark" Jeno chuckled and Mark smiled.

"Yea we had messed up parents but luckily we have eachother" Taeyong said and Mark smiled.

"Yea we're definitely all Ten has" Haechan said wiping a fake tear, "No friends, just his brothers to have his bachelor party with"

"Okay now you're dead" Ten said chasing Donghyuck around the bar.

It resulted in them getting kicked out but they all laughed as they made their way to cafe moon, talking animatedly and happily.

The night was long and their futures prosperous.

~~~

The Lee Brother's- A mini series

Previous Part: Lee Donghyuck

[obae-me]

Could I please get hcs on how the brothers would react to a mc that doesn't like or feel comfortable receiving compliments? They personally make me uncomfortable since most of the time, people only give me compliments if they want something from me or are just joking and being cruel.

I’m sorry this one came out late, but I really liked writing this one. I hope you like it, thank you, Anon! 💜

Lucifer

He’s the Demon of Pride, and as such, despite his sound and logical mind, he doesn’t realize there are...people...who don’t like compliments. It doesn’t occur to him as a possibility at all. He loves compliments. He thrives under praise. He’ll puff up his wings and strive for perfection just so people will look at him.

So, naturally, he finds compliments to be high on his list of forms of affection. If MC does something right, he’ll compliment them. However, in return all he’ll get is a scoff? A questioning glare? This makes him furious.

What he doesn’t realize is that MC is used to being used. To being praised only to be betrayed. There was always an ulterior motive, so why should demons be any better?

“You would throw back something I willingly gave you?”

“You’re only giving me a compliment to get something out of me, so why don’t you just tell me what you want instead of lying to me?”

That wasn’t a rebuttal he was expecting. Yes he was a demon, and yes sometimes his intentions weren’t the most pure, but to think that someone would believe he’d sink so low as to give compliments in desire to extort them? His brothers maybe, but him?

He took a moment to look at their expression. It was sour and uncomfortable. It’s not what he expected. This was a problem that went deeper than just distrust in demons. He’ll ask them if they’ll talk about it. They don’t go into detail, which he respects, but explains that compliments feel only like lies, and it makes them uncomfortable.

He’ll learn to find other ways to praise them other than compliments. He’ll reward them with a dinner or a little treat. If they’ve done something he’s really proud of, he’ll put it up where people can see. He’ll still give them simple compliments every now and again out of habit, and while MC still doesn’t fully accept it, they’ll smile and nod this time instead of throwing it out the window.

Mammon

He doesn’t give out too many compliments to anybody in general, much less a human. On top of that, it’s especially rare that he’ll give a genuine compliment. This is the demon that MC should be wary of, if he says something nice about them, it’s a very very high chance that he does want something. Not necessarily because he wants to harm the other person, it’s just that he’s grown up with Lucifer as an older brother, and more often than not, puffing up his ego can get him off the hook.

Naturally though, this makes MC very distrustful. On the off chance he does give MC a legit compliment, he might as well have said that he doesn’t like money, because they won’t believe it one bit. He’s totally in the dark about it, he doesn’t get humans at all. He thought he did a good thing, he thought they would’ve loved praise from him, the one and only Mammon. He went out of his way to ask Solomon about it. He was a human too so surely he’d understand.

“Probably because they think you want something, Mammon.”

“But I didn’t that time!”

He was hopeless.

If that’s how they felt, he was going to have to show them how genuine he could be. He was a gentleman, an icon, a pillar of power, so he was going to have to prove it. Everyone found it amusing just how exaggerated he was, treating everything that MC did with respect and reverence. Even Lucifer was in awe over how hard he was working to treat people with honest intentions.

He would make sure MC was there when he returned stolen things back to his brothers. He tells them he’ll cut off gambling and bets immediately. He opens doors for them and escorts them to RAD all without asking for a fee. He wanted MC to trust him, he thought that maybe, just maybe, someone wouldn’t call him scummy for once.

Yes, the brothers had a secret bet with themselves to see how far Mammon could last. Lucifer won, he tends to know his brothers the best. Mammon stopped being completely honest to everyone in about two weeks. He really did try his best to continue to be honest with MC, though. Even if no one else did, they wanted MC to trust him.

Levi

He has a hard time taking compliments too, so if there’s anyone that understands MC, it’s him. Compliments always riddle him with anxiety. He can’t be anything but a dirty, nasty, ugly otaku. His brothers tend to just roll their eyes at it. He’s a powerful demon, he can’t really think that way, he’s just being whiny.

So if MC doesn’t accept any of his compliments, he thinks it’s himself that’s to blame. Of course they’d look extremely uncomfortable to be complimented by him, they probably thought he was a pervert now. He shut himself in his room for days. The brothers had seen this happen before, so they weren’t concerned, but MC couldn’t help but be worried.

They came up to his room, knocked on the door, but was left with silence. Not surprising. They felt like they had to apologize anyway, so they spoke to the door, hoping that maybe Levi would hear some of it. They apologized for making him feel bad. They apologized for being stupid, for being rude.

Levi opened the door, shaking his head furiously. He hadn’t thought that of them at all. They both end up putting their feelings on the table. MC will share with him some of the stories of why they can’t trust honey-coated words anymore. Levi will talk about his failures as the third-born.

“We’re both a mess, aren’t we?”

In the end they’ll both spend much more time together than they had before. Even just the peace of being in the same room, even if they were doing different activities, set them a bit more at ease.

They both worked on trying to be better at accepting compliments, with no pressure put on them, of course. And if any demon ever tired to butter MC up to abuse them, they’d be destroyed by Levi before anyone could say Game Over.

Satan

One time tried to give MC an compliment that was so eloquently written, it could’ve been written by a poet. They did not take it well, to no fault of Satan’s or his work. It was so disgustingly sweet, MC went pale, nauseous off his words.

Satan felt so angry and embarrassed, he refused to be around MC for a week. Which made things worse. Both Satan and MC were spending far far too much time in their rooms and spending copious amounts of effort just on avoiding each other. The other brothers had had enough. They all got together and summoned both of them downstairs to talk. Lucifer called them out.

“Whatever happened certainly doesn’t warrant this new behavior, so you two are going to talk it out. Now.”

“Satan doesn’t like me, doesn’t surprise me, I knew everything was a lie anyway. With a compliment like that, it was too good to be true.”

Satan was uncharacteristically at a loss for words. The brother’s plan seemed to be working, so they left the two alone to talk it out. The two went back and forth for a while, clearing up all the misunderstandings. Satan had never felt dumber. He knew more than most, even among immortal beings, and yet he still let his emotions overtake his logic.

Now that he knew how MC felt about compliments in general, he knew how to handle them. If anyone thought that words alone were among his area of expertise, they were mistaken. He would do countless research on other ways to show praise and affection that wouldn’t come off as hollow. He’d fight anyone that made them uncomfortable again.

Asmo

He’ll have the hardest time with this. He’s a compliment churning machine. He’s a hype man. He’s a man of love., and so he wants to let the people he loves just how much he loves them.

It’s like never ending torture for MC, and they can’t help but feel like he’s doing it on purpose. How could he tell them they look amazing? How could he cuddle as close as he wants and describe them down to the detail? Every day made MC feel sick.

It got worse when MC was around him the first time he got drunk. He’d throw himself at them, every word he said laced heavy with alcohol.

“MC, you’re so cute, I want you by me all the time. MCCCC, you’re so wonderful, and beautiful, and cute-ah but I already said you were cu-“

MC shoved him off of them in a panic. “Stop, Asmo. Just stop!” They fled to their room leaving a confused drunk demon on the floor.

The next morning, while he fought a demon-sized hangover, he draped dramatically over his bed, running over last night’s kerfuffle in his head. Although the minor details were fuzzy, the important parts remained, including MC’s words. What’s this he was feeling...guilt? No no, he couldn’t have that, he needed to fix this right away.

He brought over his fluffiest robe and a tray with little cookies and fruity tea. MC almost didn’t let him in, but Asmo looked...different. Asmo sat them down and made sure they indulged themselves a little before apologizing. He had gone too far, and making other people feel uncomfortable was not an attractive quality.

MC felt like they needed to admit to him as well that any compliment they receive makes them feel that way. It was just too much for them all the time. He’s stunned, but how is he supposed to tell you how much he loves appreciates you?

MC decides to limit him to one compliment per day, maybe two if they feel like they can handle it. So now every day Asmo stays silent till he can think of the most perfect, most beautiful thing to tell them, hoping that maybe one day they’ll fully believe him and take it to heart.

Beel

He’s very much an actions over words person, so it’s rare that he’ll compliment MC with words alone. He likes to bring MC food, make sure they’re well fed and hydrated. He’ll keep them protected, that’s how he best shows his affection. He’ll follow MC everywhere he can, watching over them.

Sometimes he does tell them that they’re so sweet, and MC just shrinks further into their seat. He’ll frown. He doesn’t know why, but he does notice this anytime he says anything nice about them. So he’ll double down on getting them all the food they want. For him food equals love.

MC found it nice, since he was working so hard on making them feel good without trying to compliment them, but one night they came to their bedroom to find enough food to feed a small demon army. They appreciated it, but maybe Beel was taking this further than he needed to.

They brought him back to their room, and he looked extremely pleased with himself. He wanted MC to eat it all, he wouldn’t have one bite...other than the few bites he snuck already. However, MC begged him to help them eat it, it would be impossible to eat it all themselves. While Beel was eating, MC sighed and crossed their legs.

“Beel, I appreciate this so much, but you don’t have to go this far for me, you haven’t done anything wrong.” 

They explained how they just didn’t like compliments in general. No matter who they came from, no matter who said it. Demons, angels, humans, even God himself could say something kind about them and they’d still take it with a grain of salt.

It didn’t take long for Beel to understand, thank goodness. Of his many brothers, Beel is one them who supports them immediately despite how strange it seems. He’ll back down a bit, but still make sure MC knows every day how much he is proud of them by the things he does.

Belphie

Get a compliment from Belphie? Probably if there was something majorly wrong. He’s not good with words in general, and he doesn’t compliment anyone. Not his brothers, not humans, not even Diavolo. So this isn’t too much of an issue for MC.

However, he keeps a close eye on MC, closer than most people realize. Because of this, he notices one day when a grimy, good-for-nothing demon he doesn’t know, tries to win MC over with their words in order for them to do something.

“Aw come on, MC, you’re so smart, brilliant even! So won’t you do my part of the project for me? It’s nothing you can’t handle, you can handle anything!”

He can’t help but notice MC lean heavy on the wall behind them, using the books in their hands to cover the lower part of their fading face. He comes over and puts a ‘friendly’ hand on this demon’s shoulder. Upon laying eyes upon one of the powerful Student Council, they hesitantly tell MC they’ve got somewhere to be and then scatter. Belphie looks at MC and shakes his head a bit.

After what he’s done, after everything he’s said, he has no business helping MC out like this. He knows how much of a hypocrite he seems. He shoves his hands deep in his pocket and turns away. No wonder they can’t take compliments very well when every demon here that does sounds like, well...sound like him.

“Thank you, Belphie.” He stops, looking back over his shoulder at MC. This human...they were so dumb and confusing, but...he didn’t want to leave them alone. They were exhausting yet because of them he’d slept more peacefully and had more good dreams than nightmares.

He won’t ever tell them how much they appreciate them, which is fine, sometimes MC prefers it that way. He’ll mostly stay silent, but stay close to them. MC can know how much they mean to him without him having to say a word. Especially if Belphie feels comfortable enough to fall asleep on them, sometimes in their lap, sometimes on their shoulder. It says volumes.

[roll-da-credits]

A Bunny with Bunny?  -Tamaki x reader-

Word count: 2k

Tamaki was someone who needed constant reassuring, you knew that when getting in a relationship with him. But sometimes, you forget. With a new tiny addition to your family distracting you and taking all your time, its hard not to get insecure and jealous.

A/n: AHHHHHHH, I can’t. I hope you guys enjoy the first fanfic I post here. I’ve literally never posted in Tumblr ever. I’ve always used Wattpad.

It was common knowledge by this point that Tamaki Amajiki had a lot of insecurities and anxiety. It only heightened when it came to you.

Although, a lot of the time you diffused his anxiety and insecurities pretty quickly once you realized. Whenever it came to you, he found himself deep in thought at night thinking if he deserved you.

In his mind, you were an incredible person with an equally wonderful personality. While he, on the other hand, was shy and riddled with nervousness at any social interaction. You shone bright, much like Mirio, he thought of himself as nothing compared to you.

Every single time he's had one of those thoughts, you'd be able to sense his doubts by the way he carried himself. Not doubts about your relationship or you, but on himself.

So, the entire day you'd stick close to him, showering him with light affection that you knew won't embarrass or make him feel even more embarrassed.

He considered himself EXTREMELY lucky to have someone as understanding and caring as you in his life. He knew dealing with his myriad of issues was difficult. But you went through them with no problem.

You even helped him with helping himself. By your constant words of affirmation, he's been able to be a bit more confident, even when you weren't there to help him.

Time went on, and by the second year you were dating, he barely had any doubts about himself in your relationship.

That is until he heard your conversation with Nejire.

"Just look at him!!!" You squealed in excitement.

 He was going through a hallway when he heard your and Nejire's voice when the hallways separated to the right and left. He stopped to listen in, curious about what you were talking about.

 "He is adorable." Nejire seemed to agree with you, peeking at the corner. He saw how you gushed about whatever photo you were showing Nejire.

His heart sank a little bit, but he wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was a photo of a family member.

"I just met him like last week and already have A LOT of photos of him."

Ok, this is starting to not sound like a family member.

Maybe it's a friend's baby brother. You have a lot of friends outside of the school you were close to their siblings as well.

"I just want to pamper him with all the kisses in the world and give him world!!!" You gushed.

Shit.

 Tamaki felt his heart drop. There's no way you were talking about a family member. Not by the way you seem to be enamored by them.

He tried to think back on when you seemed to lose interest. Thinking back to last week, did you act any differently?

If you did, he didn't notice it. The problem was last week you said you were ridiculously busy with stuff at home. He could even see from the tapping of your foot to the ground when it was last period you were aching to go back home.

Was it because of this new guy?

His heart clenched at the thought.

"God, I love him so much." His mind begged him to stop listening.

But before walking away, he wanted to hear what Nejire might say. There's no way his best friend would be ok with this.

There's no way she wouldn't protest at you being infatuated with another person when you were still in a relationship with Tamaki. That's just what a good friend would do. Instead of that, she said jokingly.

"Watch out a certain blue-haired boy might get jealous." You both laughed at her remark.

Did you think he wouldn't get jealous over you doting on another guy?

Did the nights you spent together cuddling and napping together really meant nothing to you?

His insecurities crept back into his mind. Tiny voices whispered about how he should've expected it. He should've expected someone as radiant as you would never want to be with someone like him.

His vision was blurred by the lot of tears that came down as he furiously tried to wipe them away.

He didn't watch the way he was going, and as a result, he bumped in head first to someone's chest.

He tried to mutter an apology, yet it came out as a stuttering mess of squeaks. "Woah! Slow down, Tamaki. What's wrong?"

Mirio.

Thankfully the guy he bumped into was Mirio, one of the most understanding guys he ever known.

Mirio pulled Tamaki to the side, where they both sat on a nearby seat. He patiently waited as Tamaki rubbed his eyes red, trying to clear his eyes from tears.

When Tamaki finally calmed down a little and is now just sniffling once in a while, Mirio braved himself to ask the question.

"Hey, Tamaki, what's wrong?" Tamaki's gaze still fixed to the ground, spoke in a voice barely above a whisper. "I think Y/n doesn't love me anymore."

Mirio's eyes went wide in shock. He didn't believe that in a second. You're the person who'd take any chance you can get to attack Tamaki with kisses or force him to cuddle with you whenever he felt unloved.

"Why do you think that?" Mirio composed himself. "I overheard them and Nejire talking about some guy she found cu- cute."

He stuttered a little bit at the end, finding it hard to believe that he would ever say that out loud.

"There has to be a misunderstanding here. Are you sure it's not just some celebrity or a family member?"

Tamaki heard the small panic in Mirio's voice. He knew Mirio didn't want to accept the fact either. "I heard them say that they just met him last week and that they wanted to give him kisses."

Mirio rubbed his temples to try and cope with the upcoming headache caused by stress.

There would be no way that you'd do that to Tamaki, is there?

There was a possibility that you and Tamaki's relationship didn't work out. He knew relationships aren't always permanent. But he didn't believe that you'd be such a coward, flirting with other guys when you were still in a relationship with someone who's head over heels for you.

"Tamaki, how about this." Mirio wanted to come up with a plan. Since it was already time to go home anyway, he thought it'd be a great idea to do it. "You and I can both go to Y/n's house, where they're most likely at right now, then we can talk about it."

Tamaki looked like he was about to disagree until, Mirio cut him off, "We need to make sure we read the situation correctly. We don't want to assume the worse, but at the same time, we shouldn't be needlessly positive either."

Tamaki gaped at Mirio's calmness. He knew he was so lucky to have Mirio as a friend. Someone level-headed that was able to bring Tamaki's mind to the situation at hand.

Tamaki agreed with Mirio together made their way over to your house. Albeit, both of them pretty nervous about what they might uncover.

When reaching your front door, Tamaki noticed how your parent's car wasn't there, which meant they weren't home. Tamaki took the spare key you gave him and opened the door.

It was relatively quiet until there was a high-pitched squeal from your bedroom.

Tamaki jumped at the sudden sound, and Mirio identified it as Nejire's voice.

"HE LOOKS CUTER IN PERSON!!!" They both heard Nejire scream.

Both the boys had incredibly bad feelings about this. Nejire's statement only confirmed the fact that you had brought this guy to your house.

Tamaki shook his head when Mirio motioned him to open the door to your bedroom.

He didn't want to see you all over a new guy who took your interest.

Hell, he didn't even want to be there in the first place.

Mirio sighed and nodded. He understood the circumstances his best friend was in and decided to open the door first.

When he did, the sight made his mouth gape open.

"Mirio!" You greeted the Tintin looking man (he looks like Tintin sue me.) "I've been looking for you everywhere. I want you to meet a special someone."

Tamaki, from behind Mirio's muscular physique, was still hidden from the two other people in the room and also couldn't see anything.

He only assumed the worst.

"This is Shiro. My parents bought him as a gift, and isn't he just the cutest little thing."

Wait

Wait

WAIT

BOUGHT??

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BOUGHT???

Tamaki pulled Mirio away from the door frame and looked at the sight that made Mirio so speechless.

Nejire was sitting cross-legged on the bed, her hand filled with fresh and clean greens.

You were sitting cross-legged as well, but on the ground. In the middle of your legs slept a tiny little black and white Dutch rabbit. (search them up they're adorable)

Now he understood why Mirio was speechless.

It was never a family member.

It was never a new guy.

It was never even a human being.

It was a fucking bunny.

He got so jealous to the point of crying, over a damn bunny.

Embarrassment seeped through him and he instantly walked to the corner of the wall to face it.

He should've noticed the litter box in your house. And how there were tufts of fur stuck on your clothes.

God, he felt so dumb.

You were so confused at your boyfriend's sudden timidness, but because of the tiny little ball of fur currently sleeping where you're sitting. There's no way you'd move and stir him from his sleep.

Mirio laughed out loud, and you quickly quieted him, explaining how bunnies are easily spooked.

He apologized and sat cross-legged in front of you, examining the tiny bunny thankfully still deep in slumber.

"Tamaki heard you talking about little Shiro to Nejire today." You nodded, while your hand softly caresses Shiro's head.

Tamaki shuffled closer into the wall, wishing to any god out there to melt into the wall. "After he told me, we genuinely thought you found a new boyfriend."

Your eyes widened and you looked over to your shy boyfriend.

Your heart ached at the thought.

Luckily for you, Shiro began waking up. Upon waking up, he promptly walked away from you to examine the new human being in the corner of the room, Tamaki.

You stood and gave Tamaki the biggest hug from the back you could muster.

Shiro nuzzled on Tamaki's ankles a little bit, making you giggle. "He seems to like you a lot!" Tamaki still refused to turn your way.

"You know in the RARE chance that I find someone even better than you. Which may I add is close to impossible I would never lie to you and still be in a relationship with you." He valued your honesty and the way you didn't try and make empty promises.

Mirio and Nejire took this as a cue to leave. Nejire, leaving the leafy greens on your bedside table above some tissues.

You took Tamaki's arm and turned him to look at you.

"Hey, hey. Have you been crying over this?" His gaze still fixated on the floor, he nodded.

You sighed and took one of your hands to his cheek to caress it. He enjoyed the warmth of your hand and leaned into it more.

Still trying to reassure him, you gave him a small peck on his lips.

Reminding him that right now, he was the most precious HUMAN guy in your life.

Shiro suddenly thumped at the ground with his two back legs. Both of you glanced over at the tiny bunny.

He looked pissed. He seemed to be demanding your attention and is furious to not be getting any.

Both of you burst into laughter at the silly behavior your bunny was now showing. You both sat down on the floor and began to give the bunny attention.

"See even he's jealous of you." You picked Shiro up on both your hands, all his four feet safely planted on the palm of your hand close to your stomach and not high from the ground.

Tamaki looked at you and Shiro and smiled intently. "Bunny with their pet bunny."

Your face heated up at the comment he made using your pet name, "oh shut up." You tried not to sound flustered but failed miserably. By the dopey smile you have decorating your face right now, Tamaki knew you were still ridiculously in love with him.

Even if one day you're not, Tamaki feels good knowing you'd break up with him before you hurt him any further.

After all, you are his most precious, incredible, kind, caring, daring, loving, patient.

Bunny

[peanutxparker]

A (very long) list of all of my favorite AJJ lyrics because why not

Candy Cigarettes and Cap Guns (2005)

“Well my great grand-dad he died of cancer, from smoking too many cigarettes. But I must confess that he did quite profess to being the coolest motherfucker I ever met.”

“And cocaine is essentially vegan and they don't give a fuck anyway.”

“And I can't help but miss him even though he hit me everyday.”

“So fuck white people! (fuck white people!)”

“Heaven is a special place in hell where you can watch the people you hate get hurt.”

“You find me quite charming and I find it quite alarming ‘cause I'm gonna take your life. You find me quite charming and I find it quite alarming and I'm sad you won't be my wife.”

“What makes you think you can be so pretty? And what makes you think you can be so great? And what makes you think you can be so intelligent? And what makes you think you can be so far away?”

“What makes you think you can be so wonderful? And what makes you think you can be so keen? And what makes me think I can be so hurtful? And what makes me think I can be so mean?”

“Sometimes I feel like a cigarette, I'm wrapped in paper and I'm suffocating to death.”

“I don't want to be a cigarette anymore. I'll go to hell in my self death all day and night, so please just put me out.”

People Who Can Eat People Are The Luckiest People In The World (2007)

“Rejoice despite the fact this world will hurt you. Rejoice despite the fact this world will kill you. Rejoice despite the fact this world will tear you to shreds. Rejoice because you’re trying your best”

“I'm afraid to leave the house. I'm as timid as a mouse. I'm afraid if I go out I'll outwear my welcome. I'm not a courageous man. I don't have any big lasting plans. I'm too cowardly to take a stand, I want to keep my nose clean. And it's sad to know that we're not alone in this and it's sad to know that there's no honest way out. In this life we lead, we could conquer everything if we could just get the brave to get out of bed in the morning.”

“And I give a thank-you to my father for not raising me, and I give a finger to my step-father for beating me, and I give props to myself for achieving, and god damn I’m glad that I survived, and god damn I’m surprised that I survived.”

“So I looked into your eyes and I saw the reflection of a coward you and I both hate very much and then I grabbed the knife and I let the blood out of your throat and I smashed those tiny mirrors inside of your skull.”

“If I don’t go to hell when I die I might go to heaven, might go to heaven. But probably not.”

“Just happy times and half assed rhymes and mimes because mimes are dears, but most of all I want no more tears.”

“No more racism. No more discrimination. No more fat dumb fucks keeping people out of our nation.”

“We’re all one big band across this land and we should sing in tune. Let us grow the balls to break the walls, we’ve got to do it soon.”

“And I hope our candles flicker and die so that our hearts don’t burn to the ground.”

“First we were babies, we're birthing and dying. Then we were children, we're playing and crying. And then we're teenagers and smoking and fucking. But now we're all grown up and we're sadly sighing.”

“And your manic depression, it comes and it goes. Your parasympathetic nervous system reacts and you're in fight or flight mode.”

“How's the world so small when the world is so large? And what made the world? Could I please speak to who's in charge? Everything is real but it's also just as fake. From your daughter's birthday party to your grandmother's wake.”

“I've tried to know which words to sing so many times. I tried to know which chord to play and I tried to make it rhyme. And I tried to find the key that all good songs are in. And I tried to find that notes to make that great, resounding din.”

“There's someone in your head waiting to fucking strangle you.”

“I've got essays, I've got finals due. I have got lots and lots of problems.”

“Welcome to this world, have as much fun as you would like while helping others have as much fun as you're having. Be kind to those you love and be kind to those you don't but for God's sake you gotta be kind.”

Can’t Maintain (2009)

“I wanna pick up the pieces and plant them in the ground. When a tree grows there I want to chop that tree down. Build it into a boat and float it in a lake. And with dynamite I will explode the thing that makes me make mistakes.”

“Sometimes I get so lonesome I can't breathe. Sometimes I get so scared that I can't speak. Sometimes I get so worried I can't hear my heartbeat. Anyway…”

“I wanna tear out my heart and give it away to a person more deserving one day. If all I see is the worst in everything that's all I'm gonna get, that's all I'm gonna get, that's all I'm gonna get.”

“And people freak me out. People make me scared. People make me so damn self-aware.”

“I get bronchitis twice a year at least. My lungs aren't the way they should be. And I smoke more than a mother fuckin chimney. I declare war on my body.”

“You will cough up crows that peck my eyes and I will do nothing but go blind.”

“We could live there together or I'll live alone, less happy but I'll live... unfortunately.”

“And no one will know how I truly feel ‘cause I can no longer differentiate between what is fake and what is real. I don't know how I feel.”

“And I will always appreciate bad days like this because they grant me a point of reference in regards to my happiness.”

“If the bridge that I was driving over collapsed while I was driving over it that may not be such a bad thing. I would finally meet my maker, I could meet the great creator, and I'd punch him for teaching me how to sing.”

“Don't know if I believe in god but sometimes I pray because the way I was raised keeps me afraid.”

“I hope I can forgive me for having the nerve to exist. I hope someone can help me make some sense of this.”

“Sense and sensibility and peaceful productivity, a pretty girl with broken wings is all that I desire. But there's so much hostility in all the things surrounding me. The awful glow of enmity is trying to stop my shine. So I try to look inwardly at all the things inside of me but sodomy and buggery keep bubbling to the top.”

“I met you once over the phone, you sounded sad and you seemed alone. You left me but I never left you. I never had the chance to.”

“If you spend all your heart on something that has died you are not alive and that can't be your life.”

Knife Man (2011)

“There's no one to blame. People are just fucking mean.”

“So if I see a penny on the ground, I leave it alone or fucking flip it. I'm a straight white male in America. I've got all the luck I need.”

“I've got a pile of broken mirrors and I'm walking under ladders and I'll spill a ton of salt because to me that doesn't matter.”

“You were dead by the time that I had found you. Your blood was spilled on the couch where we had first kissed. So I carried you west to the sea so I could wash you. Your body felt just like a back pack.”

“I hate whiny, fucking songs like this but I can't afford a therapist. Sorry guys, here's a solo.”

“Some days I feel like I'm the weakest and others the strongest. These days are the longest and I've got the weirdest feeling about this and I wanna go away for a while.”

“I wish I had a bullet big enough to fucking kill the sun. I'm sick of songs about the summer.”

“When you have no one, you are no one. Like I said, I used to work at the people pound. All these no ones clumped together, just like a human lost and found. If they left them all be someones there wouldn't be enough to go around. It's better for us all us if there are no ones. And I knew a lot of no ones round that time. They used to all be someones until something took their life and all their someones disappeared while they're stuck there waiting in a line. And for them now, no one seems to have the time.”

“They say ambition is an enemy of weakness and greatness is an enemy of fame.When I pick up my guitar and I try to write a song, I think of what my mentor used to say… “Who fucking gives a rat's ass Steve, just write a love song. Cus they'll keep your belly full and your wallet lined. Don't bother these nice people with your sad sack songs. If you ask me I think they're just a waste of time.””

“Inspiration is the best friend of my sorrow and sorrow is the best friend of my drink. Well I want to look myself in the eye tomorrow but I'm too worried of what other folk's will think.”

“And the troubles in my heart need to get let out. And the troubles in my heart need to escape. And I never liked writing poetry and I never liked doing pottery and God knows that I never learned to paint. So every now and then, I'll sing sad songs. Cus it keeps my spirit light and my conscience clean. And if you don't care to hear I don't mind if you go out for some air. Cus I'm happy that you're happier than me.”

“So I wish I had a cigarette for every time a perfect stranger asked me for a cigarette but I wonder what a cigarette will really do to help that person out. I wish to God I had some spare change for every time a perfect stranger asked me for some spare change but there's not enough spare change in the world to make such an empty gesture count.”

“You can hope it gets better and you can follow your dreams but hope is for presidents and dreams are for people who are sleeping.”

“You don't have it any better and you don't have it any worse. You're an irreplaceable human soul with your own understanding of what it means to suffer and that’s a huge bummer.”

“I'm afraid of the way I live my life. I'm afraid of the way I don't. I'm afraid of the things that I want to do but I won't. I'm afraid of God. I'm afraid to believe and I'm afraid of all the loved ones that I've made leave. I'm afraid that my dog doesn't love me anymore. I'm afraid of the social laziness that let Kitty Genovese die. And I'm afraid of the mob mentality that makes otherwise normal people go blind. I'm afraid of the way that the world works and I'm afraid of the words in my notebooks. I'm afraid that you all know that I am a pervert.”

“It's harder to be yourself than it is to be anybody else. I wish I were a little less of a coward but the big red bird that lives under the city doesn't give a damn about me and it dies every night. So I bought a knife. I am a knife.”

Rompilation (2012)

“I used to be a spiderman, I used to be a cowboy from hell, but not anymore. Now I'm just a clam and I live inside this shell inside this shell I am. God damn I hate my brain.”

“I'll dip my brain in medicine so that you can stand to be with me.”

“Give me your tired, give me your tired, give me your poor. When our government acts like this, I wonder what World War II was for and the rest of the country hates us more and more. Lady Liberty is not a whore.”

“This is not a protest, it's a tortoise slowly pushing through a race. I hope the tortoise keeps its patience while the hare continues to pepper-spray its face.”

“There is no enemy, there's only people that also love their families and they're scared that they won't have enough long after they are deceased. But how much money do they need? Love turns into fear, and fear turns into greed. There is no enemy, there's only dummies that also love their families.”

“And this is not a phase, it's just a matter of time, with diligence and peacefulness, you will reach them and you will change their minds. If you stay there long enough, they'll start to see you.”

“And when you pushed my face in shit how could that have made you feel like a man or like a monster. It's your fault that I can't tell the difference.”

“In the evening I try songwriting. I'm self loathing, but I love singing. I'll try escaping these evil feelings but they keep coming, they keep coming…”

“So the baby's gonna have a daddy, that's wonderful news. He won't be the greatest parent but neither will you! Gotta get out while you can, otherwise you're screwed. Your legs are broken and your eyes are black and blue.”

“And smoking is like hiring a hitman for five dollars a day, and as cool as that is, I don't wanna keep dying this way.”

Christmas Island (2014)

“Shoot him again ‘cause I can see his soul dancing.”

“If you give it to me I’ll give it back much harder. If you treat me like a son, then I’ll treat you like a daughter. Everyone has a future, everyone has a soul, everyone has a heart, they have a mind, they have control.”

“The Coffin Dancer dances like he has something the prove because he does. He sleeps a couple hours in the morning, hates the morning when he wakes up.”

“The Coffin Dancer dances like he wants to make a friend, but he does not.”

“Getting naked and playing with guns. There's a gerbil in the microwave, a baseball bat in everyone. Sharing kisses and building a bomb. We'll set it off like Microsoft in '94.”

“McDonald's PlayPlace before the Xbox, cake frosting, sweet talking, bedroom wall, covered in knives, touching God, burning shit. We'll make a wish and take a trip to Future Town like our daddy did.”

“Have you ever wanted to be, have you ever wanted to see someone better in the mirror? Have you ever wanted to go, have you ever wanted to know somewhere greener, somewhere cleaner. I bet you got something beautiful in mind.”

“I can’t handle astounding works of beauty. I think I like my pretty pretty ugly but the beautiful soul I witnessed in that movie was an entirely different kind of overwhelming. It was a dog that won’t stop barking. Like a cut that never stops bleeding. Arizona sunsets in the early evening. Or a grown man inconsolably weeping.”

“I am the Kool-Aid stains on the mouth of a kid whose name is most likely Cody. He had a juice box for breakfast and he carries a stick that he most likely found in the alley. Cody doesn't have friends and his parents hate each other and he wants to find a better way to love his family and after school he hangs out in the abandoned house behind the Arby's.”

The Bible 2 (2016)

“Oh, I love you cause I love you cause I can.”

“On your last night at Saint Mary's you were way too intoxicated to breathe. So I used your ribs as ladders and I climbed up on your chest and I jumped up and down just like a trampoline.”

“Confused and rude. Such a special kind of way to be cruel.”

“If I were one of the things, I'd be american garbage. The most beautiful thing. The most beautiful american garbage you have ever seen.”

“No more shame, no more fear, no more dread.”

“And if you don't want to feel the feeling, no one should ever make you feel the feeling.”

“I thought I saw you before I knew who you were.”

“I just wanted to rage but all I got was tired”

“I showed him all the books that I was raised on. Your Madeleine L'Engle(s) and D'Aulaires' Mythologies.”

“And his eyes became a beacon, an LCD projector, broadcasting all my memories in a clear and vivid picture. His tongue became a staircase, his uvula - The knocker of an ornate wooden door that lead me straight into my future. His throat became a hallway with a thousand baby pictures and I became forgiveness, I transformed into the closure that I lost when I learned about the tragedy of all of us. I lost it when I learned about the tragedy of all of us.”

Good Luck Everybody (2019)

“If you don't give it to them they'll starve to death and that's alright.”

“I've got the normalization blues, this isn't normal, this isn't good.”

“I'm detached and I'm distracted, all keyed up but unproductive, vacillating between being all excited and disgusted and then dozing lackadaisically in this bubble where I've made my mental home. Connection's more important now than it ever was, but I'd rather be alone.”

“And when we talk about the president, we're either pissed off or we're giggling about an atrocity he's committing or some stupid shit he's tweeting. He's a symptom and a weapon of the evil men who really run the show. The ones who melt down human beings into money like a cruel Sorcerer's Stone.”

“This is the golden age of dickotry, probably the last golden age of anything, and the ugliest word in the English language is anthropocene. Good luck, everybody. Good luck.”

“But before that, you'll be a doormat, for every vicious narcissist in the world. Oh how they'll screw you, all up and over, then feed you silence for dessert.”

“I'm sorry that you have to have a body, filled with infection, one hundred scabs singing in unison, eyes and hands, sometimes bullets, uninvited, passing through us.”

“Oh to be awake for such a shitty dream. A bullet in the head of every decent thing.”

“The lake of dead black children that America created is getting fuller than the founding Fathers even wanted. The ghost of great America was underestimated and now it rages like a cold sore on the lip of this dumb nation. Again we've slipped inside a pit of absolute despair. That's where we live.”

“Rewarding our worst cruelty, they destroyed our shared reality, and now they upsell us our dignity like some fucked VIP package.”

“There is no absolute, these days there's no such thing as truth and you don't need to be a dick about it.”

“I'm a burnout and a fool, oblivious to all I do. I move my lips when I read and breathe with my mouth open, wide open. Timid, meek, and cruel, this is the best that I can do. I need to speak my truth, yet here I'm broken wide, wide open. My resentment, big and strong, and all the things that I can't change. They'll buckle me beneath the weight. I will drive myself insane with all the things that I can't change. I hate all the things that I can't change.”

“You're a loudmouth and a tool, and as it turns out I am too, and you don't need to be a dick about it.”

“Because I know that you know what I need more than me and I know that you need me more than that.”

“For all the pussies you grab and the children you lock up in prison, for all the rights you roll back and your constant stream of racism, for all the poison you drip in my ear, for all your ugly American fear. I wrote you this beautiful song called Psychic Warfare.”

“I hate you with all of my heart. I hate you with all of my art.”

“I went back to the desert, little Midwest in me, and now I am colder than I used to be. I live in a fortress the shape of my body, and now there's a coldness, and it's shaped like me. Now I don't suffer any more bullshit gladly. Even though everything's bullshit now, here in 2019 and you can bet it's gonna be a bunch of bullshit too out in sweet 2020 or whenever this album's released.”