#it can be hard at times to navigate through relationships where two people have different experiences (trans vs. cis for instance)

[uncanny-tranny]

Hi, I have a question I hope it's okay to ask here. I'm a ciswoman dating a transgender man. I know that there are a few things that he finds still difficult about being trans (but I don't know everything yet as we've only been dating for a few months). Lately I've noticed him saying some things that make me wonder whether maybe he wants some confirmation that I really see him as a man. Of course I want to do this for him, but I'm not entirely sure how. Do you have any tips?

I think so much of it boils down to being compassionate and direct. There's so much pressure on people in relationships to just "know" through divine interpretation of how to best love their partner, and there is almost no thought given about the idea of offering love being a continuous conversation.

I'm not sure what will "work" best for your partner to show that you see him and not a warped perception, so I really think asking questions about where he is at might be more beneficial, since you'll be hearing direct feedback. I know it can be hard to navigate through something you're unfamiliar with right now, so that makes it even more important that you navigate through it with the person in question.

Trans manhood looks different for... literally all of us, which is why I don't have a direct answer for how you can help your partner feel loved and seen as a man. Since it looks different for each of us, the things that affirm us and help us will all look different, as well as the things that make us feel less understood and hurt.

[felassan]

Polygon: 'How Dragon Age: The Veilguard’s writers decided each companion’s romance arc'

Rest of post under a cut due to spoilers.

“There’s so many different flavors of romances with the characters that even if one doesn’t work for you, one of them I think is likely to,” creative director John Epler told Polygon. “But they’re so tied to the character arcs that they become part of that character development as opposed to ‘and also you can romance them on the side.’” For instance, Epler said, Bellara’s romance is purposefully awkward and stilted. (“As Bellara’s writer, I’m very familiar with it,” he added.) “It’s clearly somebody who doesn’t see themselves as someone people are going to want to romance,” he said. “And so one of my favorite things is paying Bellara a compliment, and she takes it in the most awkward [way]. Because she herself as a character, and something you see through her arc, has these issues with how she sees herself, especially after what happened in her past. And so that romance kind of plays off of that as somebody who does have, I wouldn’t say necessarily low self-esteem, but has issues with self-regard. This is how that romance goes, especially if they are themselves a very awkward character.” Meanwhile, Lucanis — who joins the party after you rescue him from an underwater prison where he was tortured for a year after someone in his inner circle betrayed him — has a long road ahead of him in terms of opening up and letting others in. (That also means the results of one big early game choice might cut him off entirely.) “[He] has an arc that’s very much about family and letting people get close and seeing what happens,” said Epler. “And so with his romance, you get more of a slow burn where it doesn’t feel like you’re ever getting quite as close to him as maybe you want until the very end.” In addition to the player-chosen romance arcs, some companions you haven’t chosen to romance might enter romantic relationships with one another (or in the case of one character, with an NPC that isn’t in your party). This isn’t the first time non-romanced party members get together: A fan favorite, for example, is Qunari mercenary Iron Bull and Tevinter mage Dorian Pavus in Dragon Age: Inquisition. But Veilguard has more opportunity than ever before for these side romances to blossom. It all came down, once again, to what made sense for these characters’ own arcs. Bellara doesn’t romance anyone outside of Rook because, as Epler said, she is a “very focused person with a very specific obsession.” Romance isn’t exactly on the top of her mind. For Taash and Harding, however, a romance made perfect sense — both characters navigate accepting who they are and how that fits in with what they thought they knew about the communities and cultures they hail from."

“I think one of my favorite parts of that arc is how much compatibility comes through as you go through their arcs and you realize these are two people […] broken in ways that are so complementary to allow them to heal each other,” said Epler. “They end up developing this very lovely relationship, lovely romance that makes sense for the both of them.” Players might understandably want to go into the game without any spoilers about what characters might get together. But if you’re heading into your second playthrough and you already know more about what the characters’ relationships with one another look like, making decisions might take on a whole new level of significance. That was definitely the case for game director Corinne Busche. “What I love about those developments is that it really gives us some interesting and compelling decision-making about the choices and the consequences within the game,” she told us. “[The relationships] have an extra level, I think, for the decision making. I don’t want to get into spoilers, but there was a moment where I set the controller down and had to go, Oh my God, how can I possibly make this decision knowing what I know of these two characters and how they feel about each other? Oh, it just really makes it hit.” There’s a lot of emphasis on the inter-character relationships in Veilguard. Not only is there the usual party banter while out and about in the world, but you can also stumble upon conversations between characters back at your home base, mitigate disagreements between them, and read codex entries about their book club meetings, cooking rotation, and other things. It makes sense that writing interactions between these companions might spark some ideas for the writers. “It really does come down to who makes the most sense for these characters and who as the writers we are excited about pairing up,” said Epler. “Because I think something people forget is […] well, it’s not technically fanfiction. It’s the same impetus that drives fanfiction where you’re like, Who are the characters we love the most and who do we want to see together? Who do we think makes the most sense as a couple? And then playing with that and seeing if it actually does make sense.”

[source]

[destiny-smasher]

(Nemona getting totally blown off and stonewalled once again and trying to shrug it off once again, she's so determined! </3)

Since people on the Internet get fussy with this shit, let me state upfront these are my opinions, from the perspective of someone who shares a lot of personality traits in common with Nemona and used to be a lot like her in my younger years. Nemona's lying when she says Scarlet's behavior and needless secrecy doesn't bother her at all. She keeps enduring the neglect (and sometimes straight up abuse), because she thinks that's what Scarlet needs atm. It's hard to say how things will pan out atm imo.

The manga mischaracterizes Nemona in some ways for me -- or I guess it's more proper to say, I do not think the way the manga characterizes Nemona is as positive as the games. The manga so far really makes her out to be less mature, less healthy mentally/emotionally, and kind of a pushover who actively lets others step all over her. I don't prefer it lol

She experiences an 'invisible wall' between herself and everyone else. And Scarlet's behavior so far in PokeSpe would only exacerbate that -- BUT, the two could clearly have a very meaningful bonding if they both stick things through, in a way the game version of Nemona doesn't because the story forces the protag to more just go along with everything.

I want to believe the manga will eventually have Nemona learn to adapt to Scarlet, Scarlet slowly open herself up to Nemona over time, start doing GOOD for her in return, and heaven forbid, maybe even apologize for mistreating Nemona -- though I don't expect the latter for sure.

It can be very exhausting and draining to endure what Nemona is enduring, but if you have that determination and willpower to put up with someone's worse traits because you see the good in them, sometimes it's good to use that to be there for the other person.

Everyone's struggles are unique and people exhibit their flaws in different ways. Nemona is "too much" and Scarlet pushes back in hostile ways. Their personalities are potentially toxic for one another, tbqh, but there's so much value imo in them bridging that gap.

The core of most fictional relationships I genuinely care about and many of my real life ones is the idea of bridging the understanding gap, through communication and gestures and time spent together, where there is mutual growth and reassurance.

Because of how I've been mistreated in the past, it's REALLY difficult for me to look at Nemona/Scarlet even just as friends and not be very worried about them. They're not self-aware yet, much less mature enough to navigate their differences. But they COULD be.

Many of the most edifying and growth-defining relationships of my life were due to stark differences in personality being reconciled with mutual care, assurance, trust, and just plain holding on. I think these two can totally reach that. I just don't know if they WILL here.

Because the fact is, Scarlet's behavior is hurtful. She clearly has reasons she is this way, and sometimes you just gotta get that shit out. And having people strong enough to endure that shit can be valuable, even if you don't realize it at the time. But it's a fine line.

Scarlet seems to be dealing with mental health issues, or at the least neurodivergency -- and Nemona at least has the latter going on, too. That creates a lot of tension. But that also means they can be there for each other in a meaningful way if they can work that shit out.

At the current rate they're going, however, Scarlet's behavior isn't improving so far. It's like she just gets to be a jerk and 'get away with it' and everyone is supposed to be fine with that? Doesn't settle well with me, and Nemona sure doesn't deserve this treatment.

But at the same time, Nemona IS one of those rare people with the willpower and stubborn determination to keep being there for Scarlet in spite of things not going well for a while -- even a long while. She sees the good in Scarlet even if Scarlet doesn't.

The manga has NOT done much at all so far to sell us on Scarlet/Nemona working out even just as friends, but it feels deliberate how their dynamic has been set up. So I want to have hope there, but it does remind me a bit too much of stuff from my past, so I get trepidatious.

In a way, part of Operation Comet Punch (my long fic) entails exploring that very trepidation and (I hope) coming up with at least one 'version' of reconciling things in a healthy, mutually supportive way for everyone involved (and that goes beyond just Nemona and Scarlet).

I hope the manga can figure out ways to do this, too. Because I like the idea of Nemona and Scarlet at least becoming good friends over time. It's just difficult to see right now if you're being pragmatic.

"Desma this is a manga primarily targeting middle school boys wtf are you talking about"

Look, between my own fanfic about these characters and my real life experiences, I can't help but analyze and try to be optimistic on all fronts. I get triggered a bit by 'toxic yuri' and this is reminding me of that, but I want to believe in it EVOLVING beyond that (pun intended). And I know it can.

[theadhddimsenion]

Some more speculation from yours truly. This time on loona and octiava.

Let's first start with loona. This might surprise you all but I was formerly a loona anti. I at first though she was just an overrated piece of fur bait and I really hated her for that kick in seeing stars (and I still say that should have been done differently like maybe have her let blitz hug her at first but then she remembers she's supposed to be mad at him and that she's showing affection in public and THEN kick him, then she looks concerned for a moment then tries to play it off like she had meant to do that.) But after mastermind when she finaly showed my boy she cared i really came around to her (same with veroskia to a lesser extent) and as for what direction I think her development will take allow me to explain.

Loona is many ways is Both a orphaned kid and a shelter pet. A few of the things that those two things sadly tend to have in common is bad attitudes, severe trust issues and poor social skills. Loona definitely has the first thing, we all saw the way shs reacted when blitz absent mindedly told her he might replace her. (Again all that loona needed was just a few slight tweaks in that episode like maybe toning down the volience and actually seeing her be hurt by the suggestion.) She clearly fears the idea of being replaced a trait likely born out of her years in the pound where if you didn't satisfy the costumer you would never find a home.

The next trait her bad attuide is another much more obvious symptoms of her hard life. People don't tend to go through metaphorical and literal hell and come out with a perfectly sunny disposition. But more specificly her bullying of moxxie (which has gotten better) always came off to me as her old habits kicking in and her instinctively identifying the "weakest" person around and picking on them in a vain attempt to make herself feel better. Likely something she was on the revving end of and subconsciously adopted as a way to survive in the pound.

But there is one more trait that she definitely has and that's her poor social skills. On top of her angst she likely didn't have much in the way of friends and as anyone who has raised an abused child or dog can tell you it's important for them to have good connections with their peers and have them be comfortable around others. Have seen loona struggle to connect with other of her own species and it's only been until recently that she has actually seemed to make some real friends in the form of esme (the hound with the afro) and russ (the chubby looking hound with the dreedlocks) which she seems to have good connections with. (It also shows a bit of subtle maturity on blitzs part by not over protecting her like he used to do).

But loonas arc is far from over and given the that the 15 episodes of the next season evenly divide into a perfect three episode arc for each of the main five characters (blitz, moxxie, millie, loona and stolas.) I believe that loonas remaining development will be about her relationship with m&m as well as her learning to Navigate the social scene. But the real theory part of this theory is that I believe that Vicki (or however you spell her name. The poodle hound with the valley girl voice. You know the one that looks like Regina George's fursona?) Will be loonas equvilant to either striker or cash crimson or paimon. She was on screen for a total of what like a minute and a half but she already seemed to have some idea of who loona was and she also managed to get loona to cause a scene. She clearly had a mastery of the social scene that loona doesn't and she's seems to be a lot more popular than her to boot so I think she would be a great foil to loona. Vicki definitely seems she could be a roadblock in loonas development as she clearly has it out our beloved loonie and what's more as I have said has not just the motive to stunt loonas development by sabotaging her quest to make friends and put herself out their more and in turn learning that she doesn't have to keep her gaurd up all the time but the means as well. Plus she would be an interesting change of pace from the other villains who either try to brute force it (like striker), get others to their dirty work for theme (stella and crimson), try to politaticly weasel their way to victory (cash and andy) or are for the most part incompetent comic relief (dhorks and cherubs) while viki perfers to take a more velvet glove (pun and callout hazbin very much intended) approach by manipulating public opinion against our hellish heroine. Plus this would give loona one opponent that she can't just punch away and it would be interesting to see how she handles such a situation.

Now onto octativa. Before we begin i want to throw my hat in the ring so to speak and offer my two cents on the discourse surrounding the goetian soon to be princess. In addition to the fact that I completely agree with the fact that she is 100% valid in all of her feelings and that those who hate her for her choices are awful for trying to blame a teenager in a broken home for being irrational are truly cold hearted I believes that thr agreement that she should see Andy and stella for what they are falls flat because we'll I'm pretty sure she is aware of what they are but she's thinks that she's stuck in between a rock and a hard place. Yes stella and Andy are clearly bad people but they aren't the ones who constantly said they would do better but always failed to do so. That's what really hurt the fact that stolas put in effort to care for her but always came up short really hurt her and what's more she likely felt that stolas was her one light in life just she was to him and when she saw him ready to die for a stranger without so much as telling her of course she wasn't thinking right!! She didn't know why the trial was happening or that her father had only minutes to decide no with that emotion coming at her so fast and the feeling of seemingly being abandoned by the one person who had made consistent effort to be good to her that made her Crack. I think the griffin from american mcgee's alice said it best "true words and logic rarely defeat evil intent" and while the truly grotesque take on the queen of hearts in that game wasn't exactly evil more a manifestation of Alice's denial that the fire that took her parents and sister was just and accident the point remains. Just like blitz wasn't truly saved by just "facing" his issues in season one and two, you can't help octativa by telling her the truth here. Yes like you can't help someone who isn't mentally well to just "snap out of it" you can't help octativa here by telling her the truth about her parents marriage because while yes both just "snapping out of it" and figuring out that her mother was abusing him and he was taking pill because of that and not her are both logical conclusions. They are both just one logical conclusion against potential years of bad thinking habits and and shit ton of emotional turmoil that will take time to over come. Blitz said it best, she's going to need time to think and process her emotions and the reality of her situation properly but the the big problem Is as you might have guessed stella and Andy.

As we all know much to our surprise or at least to mine. Both stella and Andy didn't even bother trying to hide their true nature to octativa (which if it still bothers you that she is willing living with them after that keep in mind that a she doesn't have anywhere else to go other than then back to the father who always let her down with half baked promises and while stella and Andy are both clearly bad people they are the only family she has left and they aren't the ones who always let her down. They may not have even tried in the first place but they aren't the ones who always let her down and plus she is STOLAS'S daughter of course she is obviousl! and no she didn't want blitz dead she saved his ass from her uncles elsa) which I admirably should have seen coming from at least considering her complete lack of subtly and brains but that kind of behavior from Andy? Now that's odd. Perhaps he's more like his sister than we though or simply riding the high of his victory.

Well in any case as I have stated in previous posts that I believe that season three will conclude with a climactic battle to save octativa from her arranged marriage which will prove to octiava that her father really does care about her more than his personal happiness by not trying to ask for her forgiveness and simply stating that he wanted her safe regardless of whether she ever wants him in her life again but as for what happens in between that time I have a few ideas.

These may come in the form of shorts but I could see octativa trying to put up with her mother and uncles bullshit and getting increasingly frustrated and sarcastic with them and stella being unable to keep up the caring facade for more than a couple of minutes and Andy having to constantly butt in to get her to follow along with the plan.

Octativa clearly realizes something is very wrong with her new care takers but what it is specifically he can't quite put her talon on. In the meantime she has to sneak out to do anything rometly fun because stella is a prude and would rather die than let her daughter interact with the lower classes especially loona who she tries to convince octativa isn't a person but a mindless animal that will only tell her to go back to her father on behalf of "lt's" master her father new boyfriend who he "abandoned her for" but like I said Stella's incompetence clues octativa in on their masterplan. Maybe for one little adventure she could have she sneaks out for some new taxidermy after stella dumped it all and sighs when she sees one of the taxidermy owls and reminisces about her father and has a little internal monologs with her child self.

[faulty-writes]

Hello! I really love your work and your representations of the characters, i never seen a mha account write this good.

Could your please do romantic headcanons of iida with a chilhoodfriend? It can be anything you want.

Thank you for such amazing work, i really like your fanfics and how you write the characters.

[ Awe, thank you! I appreciate that you enjoy my writing and support my blog! <3 I hope I did your request justice. ]

The first time you met him, you were five years old, at a meeting, attending a prestigious school for gifted children. Tenya was standing across the room, observing his surroundings with his family, and when the two of you made eye contact, you shyly glanced away while he smiled.

You didn't tend to make friends, and Tenya put people off because of his odd way of speaking and bizarre arm movements. However, you found them endearing, and over the course of your elementary school years, you grew closer and had each other's back.

When the time came for you to advance to the next grade, you felt saddened that you would be separated from Tenya. But fate had other plans, and you, yet again, found yourself attending another school together. You happened to bump into him while trying to navigate through the crowd of fellow students. He was happy to see you. "It's quite astounding that we should meet again! However, I am quite honored to have you by my side once more!"

The two of you shared various hobbies. In fact, it was you who introduced Tenya to the wonders of encyclopedias and since then, he committed to them. Others might think he only read them because of his intelligence but the truth was, he read them because they reminded him of you, his dearest friend.

"I wish to make my family lineage proud and attend Yuuei to become a hero!" You'd be shocked at his confession if it weren't the same thing you wanted to do. But you remained silent as he took your hands, and your heart raced as he looked at you and said, "Forgive me if I am being rather forward. However, I want to request that you enroll at Yuuei as well. Regardless of whether we are separated into different departments does not matter because I do not want to lose you."

It wasn't until you witnessed Tenya during the entrance exams that you realized your attraction to him. His built physique and agility had you smitten, and this was the origin of your feelings for him. Likewise, despite ending up in the general studies department, Tenya's feelings for you shifted into a more romantic sense when he witnessed how hard you worked on your academic studies.

Apart from the obvious mutual attraction you felt for one another, neither of you confessed your feelings for fear of ruining your friendship. But those around you seemed to notice the romantic tension in the air whenever you two were together. Of course, every time someone questioned either of you, there was denial.

The first time you tried to kiss him was during the winter when you slipped and scraped your knee on a patch of ice. Tenya offered to carry you to the bathroom where he could properly dress and treat the scrape. He was so gentle when he was applying antiseptic that you couldn't help but lean forward with the intention to kiss him but ended up bumping heads instead.

Your first actual kiss was during the first-year prom dance, the lighting gave a romantic atmosphere as did the soft music. Tenya looked handsome in his blue suit, and his eyes sparkled in the darkened light. You couldn't help but lean forward, and to your surprise, he followed, and a spark came when your lips collided.

"Are you certain you wish to proceed with this…" he cleared his throat, "step in our relationship?" He was happy that the two of you had shared that wonderful kiss and had, at the same time, nonverbally expressed your feelings for one another. But he was still concerned that romance would ruin your friendship.

You managed to help Tenya through his worries and proved that despite your long-life friendship, the two of you were indeed romantically compatible. It was shortly after this that Tenya began to envision your future together. He, as a pro hero, and you by his side with the potential of expanding the Iida family.

[homestuckreplay]

EOA2 - Character Opinions

Just like at the end of act 1, I’m rounding up all the characters and how I feel about them so far, to see if my opinions change over time. There are a LOT more characters in Act 2 than in Act 1, so here’s hoping I remember them all. If I’ve forgotten anyone, let me know!

Love ♡

John Egbert – Still my most favoritest character. I love his facial expressions so much. He’s really going through it, but despite the horrors both immediate and hovering, he finds joy in the small things, which is a trait I love in both characters and real people. His excitement over making the pogo hammer is a highlight of the act, and his movie referencing so hard he breaks the box and his trying to be a paladin with the Slimer pogo as his faithful steed are excellent too. I love how John uses his very specific areas of expertise, like movies and magic and his other interests from the start of the story, to solve problems that don’t at first seem related. I love how he’s openly scared and reluctant and how he rises to challenges anyway. I love how he knows he doesn’t know things and is willing to experiment. I love how he has strong emotional responses often for no apparent reason. I just think he’s neat.

Rose Lalonde – I have so much fun reading anything Rose says. Her GameFAQs are so unintentionally hilarious but she’s also got a great intentional sense of humor, like her fake-mustache W and her trying to create the Colonelsprite. I do think she plays a little fast and loose with John’s life, expecting him to navigate combat on narrow platforms and stairs above an endless void, but I can cut her some slack because she’s having to balance her responsibility over John with trying to save her own life. All of her scenes so far have been based around her game connection with John – either actively playing the game, or trying to reconnect her laptop – and my hope for act 3 is for Rose to get a story of her own. Ideally one that involves summoning one of those sick ass creatures from the grimoire.

Zazzerpan the Learned – He is a twenty foot tall wizard, and as such, is the only Homestuck character I would describe as ‘hot’.

Wayward Vagabond – Easily the best mayor Can Town has ever had. Started off as a rude tyrant yelling at John, but it ended up just being cultural differences, and they’ve really worked on communication. I love how creative WV is, how ready they are to take enjoyment in life where they can get it, and how much they care for their non-edible possessions. They’re in this very structured, somewhat antagonistic, Sburb-mediated relationship with John, but I actually think the two of them have a lot in common, and if they could just sit down together with a big train set they’d have a blast.

Serenity – Not only is she glowing and sparkly, but she’s smart and good at taking responsibility in an emergency.

Like

Nannasprite – Ghost? Harlequin? Game construct? Loving grandmother? Nannasprite is all these things. Sure, she’s going way overboard on the cookies, but she doesn’t know John well enough to know he’s not into baked goods. And she really got him with the bucket on the door. That was a great prank. Mostly, I like her for giving me the Good Lore. Please Nannasprite, I will eat as many cookies as you want if you will infodump to me about Sburb for hours on end.

Rambunctious Crow – An absolute scamp who’s just doing what crows do. Made even cooler by the addition of a sword.

Neutral/Mixed

Dave Strider – I still think Dave sucks, just like at the end of act 1. I think his insistence on irony is exhausting and his raps are a chore to read, I hate how dismissive he is of other people’s interests and how superior he is about his own, I think he’s way too quick to resort to violence and way too slow to do any kind of self reflection. But. Having learned more about his bro and his living situation, I understand why he sucks so bad, and I don’t think he’s really to blame. I hope that Dave’s bro is kidnapped by imps soon, in Sburb or otherwise, because I think that’s the only way Dave could become someone I actually like.

Dad – I’m harsh on parents in fiction. I think Dad seems like an awesome guy, I love his Serious Business app, his preparedness re: shaving cream, his bucking of gender roles by always being in the kitchen, and his refusal to go quietly with the imps. But despite the external trappings of a father and his obvious love for John, he seems unwilling to meet John where he is and be the dad John actually wants and needs. I wish he would do more to get to know John as a person, to perhaps offer him some tasty roasted vegetables, to perhaps buy him the Nintendo DSi instead of a harlequin doll, to open up to John about his own life and to take him on some trips into Seattle. I wonder if he regrets not doing all that now that they’re separated.

Uncertain

gardenGnostic – I want to like GG, and I hope I will end up liking her, but Act 2 has built up so much mystery around GG that even though she’s had a few further pesterlogs I feel like I know less about her than I did at the end of act 1. She really plays up how she ‘can’t’ tell people things but still insists on mentioning them, which is an annoying trait, but I like her positive attitude and the fact that she’s so encouraging to her friends.

Peregrine Mendicant – I like that they are collecting mailboxes, as I am a huge fan of the postal service as an institution, but I do not have a sense of them as a character.

Mom – First off, we should eat the rich and redistribute Mom’s wealth. Her millionaire status aside, I don’t think she’s a good parent, or that exchanging passive aggressive notes with your daughter or ignoring her suicide threats is in any way healthy. But, it seems from WV: Ascend that her role in the story is bigger than raising Rose. Whether that goes towards redeeming her or makes her even worse, only time will tell.

Dislike

Sburb – I’m deeply fascinated by Sburb and I love to analyze it, and the story is making it increasingly clear that the game Sburb (2009) is just a small part of the larger entity Skaia (~4 billion BC). As a story element it’s amazing, but as a force acting on the characters it’s nothing but sinister. Willing to sacrifice the whole continent to achieve its secret goals, many of whom haven’t elected to play the game, and keeping its nature hidden from players until it’s far too late, it’s like a form of extreme gamer Darwinism allowing only its best players to survive. Its use of mind control and its impact on real life means it can’t even be fun to play, arguably the worst sin for a video game.

Sweet Bro & Hella Jeff – I would not hang out with these guys.

Midnight Crew – These four spent a hundred pages stuck in a bunker and all they were able to do was inflict violence on each other and fail to play 52 pickup. WV managed a skilful escape 32 pages after getting stuck. Case closed.

Hate

Bro – Just the worst guy imaginable. Anyone who controls a child through violence and fear, withholding food and a safe home, is irredeemable in my book and bad enough that I can’t even enjoy reading about him. There’s nothing wrong with being into puppets, or porn, or puppet porn, or even making a career out of puppet porn and ventriloquist rapping, but there is something wrong with forcing these things on people who aren’t comfortable with them and aren’t able to say no.

Lil Cal – He is bad to look at.

[savebylou]

The article basically says what it's in the title but if anyone wants to read the article it is below. The book will be out in August 1st.

Lottie Tomlinson has documented the 'highs' and 'lows' of touring with brother Louis at the height of his One Direction fame and the grief she suffered following the devastating loss of her mother and sister in new memoir Lucky Girl.

The influencer, 25, was just 16 when she travelled the world with Louis and his bandmates Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan and Liam Payne, working as a makeup artist during their global On the Road Again Tour.

And she looks back at the adventure, which began when Louis was propelled to stardom on the X Factor, in her upcoming book, where she talks about how she coped amongst the madness.

Lucky Girl, set for release in August, also reflects on the enormously difficult chapters of her life, losing her beloved mother Johannah to leukaemia and three years later, her sister, who was only 18 when she died from an accidental overdose.

In MailOnline's exclusive video, Lottie revealed: 'I have been working on a very special project, which will be launching in August. 

'It's the release of my brand new book Lucky Girl. 

'It's such a special project for me and means so much, looking back on my journey for the first time, all the highs and the lows from the early days of my career when I was just 16 years old to finding my way when life changed forever. 

'Apart from being in a place where I feel truly happy, I have learned to navigate through the hard times even when loss and grief changes your life forever. 

'People often ask me how I got through it all and this book is my answer. I hope that it can inspire you to find your own luck.' 

Lottie was just 18 when her mum passed away, describing the sudden loss as 'shocking' and 'scary.' 

Just three years later, her sister Félicité died from an overdose aged 18, leaving Lottie and her siblings including sisters Phoebe and Daisy devastated.  She regrets Félicité not having access to the help she desperately needed in the years after their mother's death and has campaigned for families to have further aid when coping with grief.  The mother-of-one, who shares son Lucky, 18 months, with fiancé Lewis Burton, has spoken about the all encompassing grief she suffered and how it put a strain on her big family.

She said: 'It was interesting how I coped… obviously it was two different relationships, a mum and your sister, which is more of a friendship and then the different ages, there's a lot that comes into play.

'There's not a one size fits all with grief and everyone deals with it in their own way.'

Lottie told MailOnline that while writing the book was a 'very emotional experience' she also loved the opportunity to look back on her life so far.  She said: 'It's going to be personal to my story. It has been an amazing experience but also very emotional. I have loved it… it's something I have wanted to do for ages. 'We have been working on this for a couple of years, I can't wait to release it and see when it all comes to life.'

Lucky Girl: Family, falling and finding my way will be published in hardback, audio (with Lottie narrating) and eBook on August 1st 

x

[the-mark-of-a-dying-star]

12 years ago, you were 15 and stood on stage with a nervous smile, excited to perform your debut song.

Critics labeled that move as "stupid," making predictions on how a soloist from a third-rate company can never survive the industry. Yet, against all odds, you won at a music show pretty early in your career.

This opened the door to success. You were able to release albums, hits after hits, won at music and award shows, filmed videos, tours around the world, and even modeling. When you decided to dwell into acting, no one was surprised.

Even when you find it hard to release any content, millions of fans are still there eagerly waiting for you. When did it become so hard? waking up has become a struggle, your manager is back to scolding you like you were some rookie, and your fans are beginning to get worried for you. It doesn't help you're still reeling from being linked to a scanda that shocked the nation. Becoming an idol was once your childhood dream, where did it all go wrong?

⊹₊⋆ play as a tired and depressed K-pop idol-actor on their 12th year in the industry.

⊹₊⋆ choose your appearance, personality, background, and gender preference. you also have to specify if you are known for your singing, dancing, rapping, or acting skills and what type of music you release.

⊹₊⋆ release your last song or last drama (or both depending on your choices!)

⊹₊⋆ spend time with 4 unique people in the industry and get a chance to either befriend them or romance them.

⊹₊⋆ navigate through the fall out of your career after a scandal that shocked the nation.

⊹₊⋆ continue to shine like a star or explode like one while trying.

Yoo Jinhyuk / Jieun ( M / F) — The Constant

Long before either you and J were idols, they were someone from your hometown who was hellbent on outdoing you. Your life was a hell, not only was K your age, they were also a family friend and your classmate.  For your entire life, whenever you do something, J will somehow find a way to do it better. It wasn't a surprise that their career as an idol flourished as quickly as yours. You have spent a chunk of your life wondering if you have done something bad to warrant such hatred. If only you could notice the looks J gives you, maybe you'd see there was never a trace of hatred.

Choi Kihoon / Kyuri (M / F) — The Newcomer

K is your senior in the industry, they debuted four years before the public even knew about you. Strangely enough, you and K have not formally met each other yet. There were many instances where you were supposed to meet them and even work with them in some films, but it always fell through. Who would have thought they would become your neighbor? Known for their intimidating looks and villain roles, K is surprisingly kind-to a naïve level. It's a surprise that they have been able to live in a world like this.  Would you give this kind newcomer a chance?

Shin Hojin / Hwayoung (M / F) — The Artist

Your relationship with H is extremely awkward even when you both come from the same company. As an industry senior, you do your best to guide H and their group so that they can avoid all your mistakes and be the best of the best. However, as H debuted later in their life, they are actually older than you. It throws you off. You don't know how to interact with them without sounding rude. Little do you know, you are their muse. The one H means when they write love songs. Can this hopeless romantic have a chance with you?

Lee Sunwoo / Soojin / Soo (M / F / NB) — The Reporter

You should not be seen with them; it will only ruin your career. It is best to stay clear of them. Well, that is what S convinced themselves. They weren't like this before. S was once known for their professionalism and straight-laced reports, up until two years ago. S was the main reporter who made the public aware of a devious crime done by different celebrities. While reporting it to the public was the right thing, S's mental health took a decline. Honestly, S is a hypocrite. They keep on telling you this friendship is a bad look when they're the ones who crave your presence the most. They want to protect you but fear crossing the line between protecting you and abandoning you.

⊹₊⋆ Trigger warnings: Depression, suicide, self-harm, internalized homophobia, and sexism. More will be added.

[deathsbestgirl]

wanna hear all you have to say about fire / phoebe <3

oh mikaela, i hope you're prepared <3 (some of this is more well thought out than other parts, tbh the longer i watched the harder it got to put my thoughts into words because phoebe is truly maddening — like you said about scully, phoebe is bad enough for me. i didn't need them to go as far as they did with diana. i get it !!!)

phoebe’s first scene hits pretty hard. because just before she enters, mulder & scully were talking about court, scully was teasing him “must be an x file” and his face is just SO CUTE because as much as they tease each other, i just don't think he's used to it yet. and scully always does it so affectionately (no other motive than she likes him & teasing him is fun)

and it's just. he's so sure he locked the car. he doesn't understand how scully was able to open it and then scully sees the tape. before we even meet her, we see how she invaded his space. breaking into his car to play a cruel “joke” to ask for his help (that's just not how you ask for help, these are adults, they're professionals — i'm so mad about it). phoebe opens the door right on time, so she's also nearby watching so she can get the timing right. it's creepy & calculated. like scully was scared, the way she gasps & jumps. cruel.

i really don't know how to put this into words but “aren’t you going to thank me? …[for] saving your life” haunts me. she does this terrible thing she knows would frighten him (and anyone else he's with...) and then tries to make it look like a favor to him. like he's lucky to have learned this lesson, that she's waltzing back into his life — with a puzzle, people for him to help, a case that we’ll learn soon is all about one of his biggest fears.

and then he talks about her driving a stake through him and she sees that as the perfect opportunity to kiss him (i am not a fan of kissing someone to shut them up, no matter the context. let them speak bitch). waits for scully to exit the car, so she can witness phoebe stake her claim on him. a kiss he doesn't return, but doesn't exactly reject either. after, he tries to move forward, introducing the two women. phoebe immediately tries to set scully against them, against her. “she hates me.” it's an attempt to isolate him and make him more vulnerable to her tactics.

what really hurts is the way it kind of works. he lets scully stick around for learning all about the case, talks to her about phoebe a little, and then tries to protect her — when she isn't the one who needs protecting. but he knows phoebe's games. she will try to drive a wedge between them. she's already started with “she hates me” — it's belittling scully. creating a fake scenario of scully vs her. she's dismissive, acts like she forgets scully is there listening to everything she says. (the way scully always observes him, follows his lead — it's special, and it helps her figure out how to navigate the situations they find themselves in. this is no exception.) phoebe tries so hard to make it just her & mulder, and he falls right into that trap.

there's just something so distasteful about bringing up a private joke in the company of others who aren't in on it. again, staking her claim and another way to push mulder & scully apart, to isolate mulder, cut off his relationships & resources so they can go back to where they left off.

scully sees so much. she was obviously put off by their introduction, but had mulder’s response to phoebe been different, more receptive, happy, excited… she may have been able to look past her distaste. the way he becomes practically docile, which is very unlike mulder except in situations with people who have hurt him, taken advantage of him, neglected or abused him… scully understands exactly what's happening. here, she doesn't even say anything yet. she comments on his behavior, but the only thing she actually says about phoebe is he won't be able to get rid of her just by taking the case to their arson guys. they both know he isn't walking away having done nothing for the case, for phoebe. they both know her motives aren't simply the case. (and god, it could have been so easy for phoebe to be genuine. asking mulder for help because she know he can solve the case. respectfully, professionally. it could have been easy enough to swallow that she's a woman in a male dominated field and uses her ‘feminine wiles’ to get what she needs. but it isn't just that at all. phoebe knows the effect she has on mulder and uses it. it's twisted. someone who has grown would not continue to act this way.)

[i talked about “mulder, you just keep unfolding like a flower” (with welsharcher’s tags) here]

the comparison beatty makes of the case & phoebe:

this is so sick actually. and scully is observing all of it, keeping herself on the outside.

something here about scully making sherlock & watson theirs <3

and oh god the rest of this scene!! this is what i mean about mulder “protecting” scully. the way he shares this … is a lot.

scully asks and mulder answers. one of my favorite things about them. they don't tend to just volunteer information, even to each other, without some kind of prompt. scully gives him the space to talk about it, never says too much but she says enough. her phrasing is SO important. she repeats what he just told her in a way that frames it as wrong and then mulder makes the same comparison beatty did, of phoebe to fire. but in the negative way we're meant to understand.

it's a little maddening that he's so aware. she was brilliant, he got in over his head, her mind games (manipulation, cruelty, forcing him to face things instead of letting him do it in his own time) and it’s a perfect contrast to scully. she’s the opposite of scully in every way. where phoebe is fire, scully is ice. where phoebe is cruel, she's so kind & gentle & supportive. where phoebe is manipulative, scully is supportive — literally so supportive, constantly throwing him a lifeline, making sure he knows he doesn't have to do it alone but (mostly) respecting his choice.

she lets him face is demons, but she’s going to continue working the case. because they're partners, and she can tell they're not going to get very far.

also. everyone should read kae's posts about fire/phoebe. they are the best ones:

fire script

scully is not jealous with kae's tags

scully knows phoebe is Awful

and bonus: i did one of my episode posts lol (genuinely don't remember it oops)

[thewayuarent]

Ways of handling addictions in Only Friends

Tw: drug abuse, overdose

Let me tell this straight away - I was in a relationship with addicted person. By the time we started dating they didn’t use drugs for about couple of months by still used alcohol a lot. They’d come a long way to be clean and I was there all the time every time. This year they collapsed. Drug overdose, the end of it.

So I know that my personal experience doesn’t make me a profi automatically. Addiction is a very complex subject and very personal experience. But I do know a thing or two about it.

And the first rule here is: addicted person will never stop because of you. They need to want it for themselves.

By this moment we’ve been shown three different dynamics where one person is addicted and the other isn’t: Sand and Ray, Mew and Ray and Mew and Top.

Start with Mew and Ray. The thing is, Mew has no obligation to save Ray. He was there for him in the worst moment and, yes, I really want to say that he had to do more for Ray - he is his closest friend and he is definitely struggling - but. But Mew has a right to step away. Because navigating someone through healing is very hard and very long process and Mew doesn’t have to deal with it. I can’t blame him honestly for that.

For what I can critique not Mew specifically but the whole friend group (all four of them yes) is the very next scene where them all - including Ray - are drinking. Like guys, Ray right here tried to overdose, may be it would be nice to have a fucking break?

The Mew and Top situation is way different. Mew finds out Top uses drugs - that’s not the best thing to learn about someone, sure. But Mew doesn’t take time to think about “do I need that in my life” (which would be understandable), no. He makes a statement: stop using drugs and I’ll have sex with you. There is your price by the way. And this is also understandable - it is a manipulation, yes, but it’s very common way to try to handle things like that, and I would argue Mew has good intentions here. And oh, Mew, my boy, I’m sorry but that’s not how things work. You know Top can have more in a phone call, right? You understand that person saying “I’m not an addict” while having a dose in his pocket it’s at least a bit shady? I know that it doesn’t automatically implicates that Top is a hard addict but still.

But he is already lying about it. Using drugs while having fun with your friends it’s not the same thing as calling your dealer and using it alone in your room because you struggle with emotions, just saying.

Making him choose will never work out. Because he will choose, and it won’t be you.

And what’s about Sand and Ray? Sand knows for a fact that Ray has problems with alcohol. He doesn’t know about drugs, at least for now. Sand and Ray know each other for a very short period of time, and Sand is “it’s not my business” type of person, so I don’t criticize him while saying the next thing. But.

Sand is unintentionally supportive of Ray’s addictions. He drinks with him a lot - they are drinking buddies. I can’t be sure but it’s kind of looks like there will be a weed smoking next episode? For Sand drinking time to time and smoking weed can be fine - he is not addicted (by what we know). For Ray it is a call. So of course Sand, so as Mew, has a whole right to live his life without dealing with Ray’s addictions. But they are definitely falling for each other. That can develop into relationship. And then it will suddenly be a problem. But isn’t it already? How will Ray react if Sand suddenly turns from drinking/smoking with him to trying to stop him? I would say not the best way. There is also an option that for Sand it won’t be a problem so we’ll see.

The addiction is not a verdict. Both Top and Ray are young and very rich and it’s a very common thing for young rich people to have some kind of stuff - drugs, alcohol or both. It doesn’t automatically mean they are doomed. But still whoever decides to be in relationship with them (Mew and Sand, talking to you) have to think about it and think hard. Do you understand what are you dealing with? Do you honestly want to deal with it? Are you ready for all of highs and lows you’re going to face? If yes, then good luck to you - it really can work out. But don’t fool yourself into thinking that there is nothing to worry about.

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

I was wondering if you have followed the story of Chappell Roan addressing fan behaviour?

https://people.com/chappell-roan-addresses-fans-predatory-behavior-in-lengthy-note-8700923

I have been following - and I love so much that she's both drawing boundaries and talking about it.

As I've said before, I think the fact that the pop stars breaking through this year are 26 rather than 16 is pretty significant - and the ability and willingness to draw this sort of boundaries is part of it. I remember reading a profile of Shawn Mendes when he was younger where he had three rules - and the one I can remember was that he would never refuse a fan a signature or a picture. I found that rule terrifying then. The idea that you can or should keep every single fan happy in a personal interaction is such a burden - one that people can't really bear. I think it's fantastic that artists are prepared to very publicly not do that.

It has been terrifying to see some people not getting it some of the responses have shown exactly why what she's saying is important. I feel like as she's held firm, more people have acknowledged her points (although the exact dynamic is hard to tell, because it is so hard to )

There is actually one thing that she said in both her Tik Tok videos and instagram statements that I disagreed with. And I've been thinking about a little bit - to figure out if I'm comfortable with where I'm sitting (that's why I haven't reblogged any of the material).

In her instagram she said 'please stop assuming things about me.'In her video when asking people about a random lady: 'would you assume she's a good person, would you assume she's a bad person, would you assume everything you read online was true.'

And in my head I answered 'oh yeah I make assumptions about random ladies all the time.'

Recently in the space of about ten minutes, two different friends told me personal gossip about two different people who had been involved in making my friend redundant at her work. I immediately passed on both of those pieces of gossip on to her, with my own embelishments, assumptions and implications.

While I think that an important part of acknowledging people's humanity and being able to navigate relationships is moving away from black and white thinking. I also think making judgements and assumptions is a key part of humanity and we cannot and should not give it up.I do think both those people are bad people, because they made my friend redundant (and any inclinations towards generosity I find it pretty easy to smother with the fact that they chose to take roles where they had the power to get rid of other people's jobs).

I find it terrifying that I don't know and can't control what people think about me and the stories people are telling - and I really am just a random lady. I'm sure it's exponentially more terrifying being Chappell Roan. But I also think it's true that what people think of us isn't actually our business - whereas the way people treat us is.

It's not surprising that that line is blurred for Chappell Roan at the moment. She has a lot of people violating her boundaries in all sorts of ways and people making their assumptions about her and then making those assumptions her problem. And I think her publicly communicating her boundaries and standing by them is an important cultural intervention.

[jeremywhitley]

Julie Power, Queer Relationships and OTPs

Hey, two provisos before I jump into what I’m about to say:

1) My last name is not Marvel and I don’t own these characters. Before and after I write them, other people will write and/or have written them. Most of them. That’s what success in corporate comics looks like in this day and age - not that you get to write a character/group of characters forever but that other creators remember they exist and include them in new stories and they get to have a long happy life. That said, characters change and the valid interpretation is the one that leads to more stories. You, as a fan, are also interpreted to love whatever version of the character you like as long as you don’t hassle creators about it.

2) As always, I am not the perfect person to write this mini-essay, I’m just the one writing the comic and therefore the one that can explain the thoughts and feelings that went into making the decisions I did.

We good? Okay. Let’s continue!

Being gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, asexual or wherever else a person falls in a spectrum does not make a person more or less than human. It does not make every relationship perfect. In fact, having a sexuality for which there isn’t quite as many years of literature and self-help books often leads to complications that you don’t know how to navigate. It is a rarely acknowledged but pretty obvious fact that this would go double or more for people who were also dealing with the complications of being a superhero in the modern era. A lot of those people have experiences with multiple apocalypse scenarios, a knowledge that there are parallel universes in which pareallel versions of them exist (like a version of me who types parallel the same way twice in a row, one can dream), mind control, reality manipulation, and time travel. Their life is complicated and relationships are difficult in a world where few of those things are commonplace.

In talking about Schitt’s Creek, Glen Weldon expressed a frustration and distaste for the central gay relationship in that show, not because it wasn’t cute and precocious but because it wasn’t realistic. You have a person who has been dating around and having several unresolved and unsatisfying queer relationships paired up with a freshly out, just admitted he’s gay, never dated another man love interest. It’s sweet. It also gives an unrealistic portrait of what life is like for a queer person. It’s hard to argue with people loving that relationship, but it’s impossible to argue with Glenn’s point. Dating is complicated and difficult. Adding queerness to that only makes it more complicated, not less. We often don’t know what we want or need and it’s more difficult to understand what you want and need with less context. Straight people have been struggling with telling their partners what they want and need even as their relationship has been a necessity of human species survival.

But we tend to push the idea of an OTP or “one true pairing” onto queer couples for a variety of reasons, but mainly two:

1) There are so few queer relationships in media that when one happens, queer audiences tend to hold onto it tightly in the worry that there will never be another one like it.

2) The idea that all or most queer relationships are the result of an undeniable love between two halves of the same whole reunited at last and it would be horrible to part them, makes queer relationships more palatable to straight audiences who are still growing in their understanding of the difference between same sex sexual attraction, same sex romance, and same sex fucking.

The end result is a pretty warped understanding of queer people and same sex relationships.

All of this is sort of preamble to say that in this week’s issue of Love Unlimited, I broke up a romantic pairing off panel that I created in Future Foundation a few years ago. In the last issue of Future Foundation, I had Rikki Barnes and Julie Power kiss. They had just been through an extremely dangerous prison break during which they had both almost died and saved one another’s lives. The moment was absolutely ripe for two Sapphic people to get swept up in the moment and intensely make out. It was a relationship I would like to have explored more, especially as they are two characters I care very deeply about. I think it would have been fun. I also do not think it would have worked out long term. Most relationships don’t and they are very different people.

I saw a post somebody made earlier today on tumblr about how Julie Power throws herself at every queer and available white girl in the Marvel Universe. There’s only one part of that I would prefer to not be true and that’s the white part. It is true about the comics as they have come out, but I don’t see Julie as the kind of person who wouldn’t fall in love with a person of color. In fact, to the point of that post, I see Julie as a person who is open to connection and cares a great deal about physical affection. She’s a hugger. She’s constantly taking people under her wing. She falls for people hard and loves hard. Not to get too intimate with it, but she’s probably a person who enjoys sex and physical contact and affection. Those things aren’t important to everyone or meaningful in the same way to everyone, but they are to some people.

But also, that doesn’t mean that every relationship those people enter into has to be THE ONE. We all enjoy our own OTPs and a lot of us have that same investment in people we know in real life. God knows, I have had that investment in queer friends that found love and there are people that have had that same investment in my wife and I because we’re a mixed race couple. Those facts about a relationship don’t make it work out without the same sort of effort, love, affection, and sheer luck as any other successful relationship. I think ascribing that same sort of mythological status to every same sex relationship is ultimately short sighted and harmful.

Julie’s way of finding love, like a lot of us, is to throw herself headfirst into relationships, love hard, experiences extraordinary moments, and get hurt when things don’t work out. She, literally, has a heroic impulse toward relationships. Is that healthy, maybe not. But hey, I kind of admire it.

So yeah, I broke up a relationship off panel that barely had a chance to exist on panel because that’s the way I see it going. On the bright side, she’s in another relationship now and we’ll see how that goes.

If there’s a thing I guess I want people to take away from this, it’s that it’s okay for your relationship not to work out and that you shouldn’t treat your queer friends like they’re characters in a Shakespeare play that have to love each other unconditionally and die together in a crypt if things don’t work out.

[luvscharlos]

i was trying to not give any anons attention, but recently ive been getting quite a lot of anon hate for being both a charles & carlos fan. so imma go on a bit of a rant.

theyre both MY drivers like how many other people have their own set of ones they like/dislike. im well aware they are not besties (obv in a sport where your teammate is your first competitor its difficult to form such a relationship and ESPECIALLY when both of them have their fair share of insane fanbases). in the beginning of their partnership i do believe that they tried to paint them as besties when it was clear they were barely getting used to eachother. but throughout the time theyve been teammates theyve shown that they do have a special way of navigating their relationship. both with two different types of personalities but they manage to understand eachother so specifically. theyre both sensible and mature individuals who understand how the world of f1 works and are a good pair. the fact that even people outside of the respective fandoms notice how they work and have quite a bit too say on the delusion that they loathe eachother is quite insane. yes, they have spats sometimes, not everything can be sunshine and rainbows, but when its good its good! the argument of saying theyre just coworkers/ are acting is so.. dated 😬 (also when we’ve clearly seen them act..terribly).

do i think carlos went over the limit yesterday? yes. but as charles literally said theres times where one or the other goes over sometimes. they both have also said that they both push eachother to be better, thats what good drivers/and or teammates do. if we recall monza 23 where they both battled eachother HARD, which many people thought was too much, and both charles and carlos had crazy smiles on their faces cause they had so much fun. even charles saying that that’s what f1 is supposed to be like. its racing, they are there to be the best and there are no friends on track. perhaps in 25 they’ll have more of an opportunity to grow seperately and together (without the pressure of being teammates, like carlos has said before) instead of always being tied down by it every single weekend through the media hellscape of f1.

to conclude, i will continue to love my pr boys 😮‍💨 who are both top and hot competitors. (with inexplicable tension sometimes😵‍💫). let me enjoy the last year in PEACE.

[alekyareads]

I never thought i would be back so quickly to posting on tumblr due to a lot of issues coming up in my life all at once. but i saw the discourse of who Anya loves more her mom or dad and made me realise how much of a essentially unhealthy relationship they have.

Now, before anything, let me say i love and adore the series so far and this post is not meant to hate on any of the characters. I love how they are presented in both the anime and the manga and how Endo brings out the nuances of the characters in the situations they find themselves in. Second, this post will contain manga spoilers.

Starting off with Loid/Twilight, cause currently where the manga rests, the lines are blurring between the two personas. He is caught thinking that everything he dose is for the mission, weather that is true or not is up for debate its not, he is falling for his family Hard The way anya perceives this is essential. She is younger than six, and at that age a child is still learning and cannot tell the difference between rejection/acceptance. if we look at a teenager, an example of behaviour could be if someone found out their friend was only with them for the benefits, weather it may be social or related to studies, that person will be hurt. Anya sees the 'for the mission' As taking part to save the world with her papa. When Loid brings up plan-C, Anya thinks of her mother as competition. Not necessarily as 'papa will send anya back to the orphanage if she doesn't get stellas' type, but papa will not care about me anymore or i am not the priority type. If at some point in the manga when all the secrets are revealed, if the Forger family doesn't sit down and have a talk about their thoughts, Anya will grow up to to have many issues on a healthy relationship dynamic in her daily life.

For Yor/Thorn Princess, the issue arises in two parts. one, Yors relation with herself, And two, How Anya perceives her mother as competition. First we know that Yor never really interacted with people and wes solely focused on her job as a hitmen and taking care of Yuri. This lead to her having insecurities and being unable to navigate social situations properly. This is seen in how she interacts with anya. She is accepting of anya the second she meets her and this relation has progressed quite fairly until Yors interaction with melinda Desmond. Here, we see two distinct paths of thought. Yoris slowly getting over her insecurities by interacting with a group of mothers and learning more of herself. While anya sees her mother as competition. Thus, what I predict is that some time in the future, Yor hears Anya say something about her in her childlike whims and the genuine fear of not being taken care of anymore, this will break a few of the bridges built between the mother and daughter.

Yet, even after looking through all of this, I still believe that there is love present in the family. Weather or not some may be ready to call it 'love', There is care and looking from the first episodes, we can see how well written and nuanced the character emotion and interaction towards each other have grown. And this family slowly yet surely growing from a place of lies and deception and fear to acceptance, love and care is one of the favourite parts of the series foe me.

[ishgard]

Ship questions: Who takes the lead in social situations? How are they around each other's friends?

Thank you for the ask! A sliding scale of three ships for this one.

Ahru & Zenos: Ahru is basically always leading here. Zenos isn't going to not talk or anything, but he's decidedly uninterested in most things/social situations, apart from perhaps observing how Ahru navigates them. (Please imagine with me the 'he asked for no pickles' with Ahru, who comes to like, his fucking waist 😂)

Needless to say, things were kind of tense with Zenos around almost all of the people she would call friends, like what are you doing walking around with that feral lion on a leash? But he's just a sleepy disinterested guy, they've had their spar, he's had his enrichment, it's fine. I do like to think down the line he'd start to gain some small rapport with the scions though, bonding over a variety of things. Him and Alisaie and Estinien sparring, or him and Urianger having hard-to-follow discussions about books they've read, etc. etc. But for his part, he's well-behaved enough, though he can get a bit snide and make the occasional scathing remark.

On the flip side of this... Zenos doesn't really have friends, so.... 🤷‍♀️

Ahru & Deryk: Of the three, he's the middle ground here. He's polite, absolutely knows all of the Scions and the rest of Ahru's friends and allies and the ins and outs of her relationships and feelings towards them, and does his best to maintain a less intensely knowledgeable presence. ^^ He won't typically take the lead in social situations where her friends are concerned, but isn't opposed and comfortable enough doing so, and shares that role of 'taking the lead' when dealing with others on their travels.

With her friends there's that degree of yeah, he knows them, but not as himself? But he knows precisely how important they are to her and are similarly important by extension to him, so while there can at times be a bit of awkwardness there, overall they're on good, budding terms. As for Ahru towards Deryk's friends........ :'''') Well, she did get along with them. Briefly.

Ahru & Thancred: These two. They're in perfect tandem, always. They can weave their way through just about any social situation together, each picking up where the other left off, leading conversations, getting information, or just being the life of the party. When they're in a room together, the bond between them is pretty unmistakable, like they're always in on a secret no one else knows. Who is leading and who is following shifts with the music of the moment.

Most of their closest friends (see: family) are, of course, shared. Friends outside of the immediate Scion-circle are rarely treated particularly different though because again, they've just got this deep and lasting bond and trust in one another; if you're his/her friend, I don't see a reason we wouldn't at least get along. (Loud exceptions: Zenos, Emet-Selch, Thancred's more obnoxious ex-lovers, etc.)

[varley-of-torment]

Favorite Merceleth headcanons?

Thank you for the ask!!!

Merceleth isn't really a ship I have headcanons for? it's more like I have reasons for liking them as a couple, but also those reasons are kind of grounded in hc?

I guess one headcanon is that they're very in tune, almost inherently. Shortly after getting to know each other, they know they can rely on the other as if they were their right hand. They balance each other out, yes, but they're also on the same page about a lot of things. Their backgrounds, personalities, behavior, they balance each other out, but like their nature is the same page. If that makes sense.

I love merceleth because of that mix of opposite (devil/angel, mercenary/nun, fighting/healing, deadpan/cheery, good with complex things* and bad with people/bad with complex things and good with people, etc) and of connection; It's what makes them such an entertaining pair to me. I love imagining everyone else in the monastery being baffled by their in tune-ness and how well they understand eachother.

My other headcanon is that part of why they connect is their childhoods; Byleth grew up in a mercenary band, and as well adjusted they may be, that's still a pretty disillusioning and violent upbringing. Mercedes grew up in an abusive family and lost her brother at a young age. This is hard to explain unless you've experienced it, but going through life having had a chaotic childhood can make you feel disconnected from your peers, like you can't be on their level because you've learned to navigate disfunction while they have known function, or the things that seem important to them seem irrelevant to you (or whatever! this is a nuanced thing). So when they meet, they find someone, like them, who "gets it", who they feel normal around.

(I have spent the better part of two years obsessing about Mercedes's psychology and childhood, which is where most of my headcanons lie. Probably my most important Mercedes hc is that she's a CSA survivor, and that definitely effects her relationship with Byleth, so that's a merceleth hc by association; it definitely ties into my point above about meeting someone who can understand your trauma.)

More traditional hcs because you got me going now: I think they'd try on each other's clothes and have a great time. I've said this before but I think prof au they mix up letters to each other and graded papers and accidentally hand back a letter to students. I think they stay up all night talking. I think they both admire the other's way of doing things, like Mercedes is very impressed with Byleth's sword skills and Byleth is so impressed by her sewing. I think they're both smart but when they together they become idiots (affectionate) I think individually they're good in a crisis but if they're together they will somehow make the situation worse. I think prof au they are always sneaking their relationship around seteth. I think they see the students as kids but the faculty sees THEM as kids. They are a sitcom duo to me <333 these characters are pure serotonin <333 theyre so silly <333

*I don't know how else to say this?? I mean Byleth is good at war strategy and teaching a lot of different subjects and is just super intelligent in specific ways that Mercedes is. not. she can't hold too many numbers in her head at once she is self diagnosed scatterbrained.