#isabella dorta
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One thing about me is I suffer from depression and when it's dark, I really struggle.
A few months ago I found a spoken word poetry who captured a lot of my feelings in a few of her poems. I ended up buying one of her books that doubled as a self-help journal.
Reading back through some earlier pages now ... I'm feeling very Stolas coded 🤔
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I want someone to chase after me
I want my movie scene in the pouring rain
I want sunflowers because they’re my favourite
I want someone to show up at my house unannounced
I want hands held
I want the love letters
I want poems written about me
I want songs sung together
I want to sit on a beach and watch the sun setting
I want stargazing
I want to be missed when we spend too long apart
I want nights in together
I want nights out together
I want planned futures
I want playful fights over whose eye color our babies will have
I want pictures of us laughing
I want the last slice of toast because it’s always my favourite
I want the right side of the bed
I want ‘I love you’s traced on my back while I’m half asleep
I want someone who can’t take their eyes of me in a crowd
I wanna be made to feel special
And I just want someone to love me
poem by Isabella Dorta
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i know a person shouldn’t be
your only source of happiness
but the absence of someone
seems to be my only reason
for unhappiness
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“deluded a guide to situationships”
-isabella dorta
#one of the first ones I REALLY related to so far#isabella dorta#deluded a guide to situationships#poetry
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I think you hate yourself
For who you are
And who you’re not;
I think you wish
You were everyone else
And no one — Isabella Dorta
#quotes#quote of the day#mental health#life quotes#quotes on tumblr#follow me#Isabella Dorta#books#poetry#poem#poet#poets#poetic#poets on tumblr#writer#author#tiktok#depression#bpd#eupd#anxiety
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from: the letters i will never send (isabella dorta)
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JOMP BPC: poetry
Like Brushing My Teeth
Two minutes…it’s just two minutes out of my day
I can sing the happy birthday song in my head three times over to distract myself
Back…and forth
And it’s so repetitive but I was always told that sometimes in life
We have to do things we don’t particularly like
Back…and forth
And I hate the taste in my mouth
Especially when it starts frothing up
Back…and forth
Am I done now?
I must be done now
It has to have been two minutes
He said it would only take two minutes
Back��and forth
He said it would be easy
And quick
And like brushing my teeth.
This is not like brushing my teeth.
I did not swallow my own tongue,
He reached between my lips
And took it from me.
I shut my mouth,
I did not want him to reach in…again,
I did not want him to take my teeth as well
Back…and forth
I thought, if I don’t move
And I just keep my mouth closed
He’ll only invade the one set of lips
Back…and forth
Afterwards, he gave my tongue back
But it never really felt like it belonged to me…again,
I did not use it
I did not tell anyone
I was too scared of losing another part of me
As if mentioning what had happened
Meant it would happen again
Back…and forth
He made it sound so normal
Like everyone did it like it would be weird if I didn’t
Back…and forth
If I mention it then I have to acknowledge it happened
It was…only two minutes
It was just like brushing my teeth
Back…and forth
- Isabella Dorta
This poem is probably my favourite piece of spoken word ever. Truly a masterpiece.
#booklr#bookish#books#bookworm#book#book worm#bookworms#books and reading#reading#jompbpc#jomp bpc#just one more page#poetry blog#poetry#poems#poetic#words words words#poems and poetry
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The Letters I Will Never Send by Isabella Dorta
#this is so jessxleto coded#my first thought was this is the babes#lady jessica#leto atreides#leto x jessica
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"You have returned me back to sender
Packaged me up in whatever I came in
but just a little less neatly
and with a whole lot more damage."
From - "Deluded" - Isabella Dorta
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TAG 9 PEOPLE YOU WANT TO GET TO KNOW BETTER !
favourite colour : Blue currently reading : "The letters i will never send", isabella dorta . last song : "Life in a Northern Town" by Dream Academy last series : Taboo (on Netflix). last movie : The Wonder. sweet / spicy / savoury : Spicy. currently working on : reading around a certain topic.
consider yourself tagged.
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how sunflowers bloom under moonlight by Isabella Dorta
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“Be sure of me. Surer. Know that this is an absolutely terrible idea, and do it anyway. Kiss me when everyone is watching, hold on to me in public and love me loudly.. let the timing be wrong always but choose me anyway. Make it hard work, make it near impossible work, unachievable, unattainable work, and make us long to do it anyway. This will not be an easy Sunday morning kind of love. This will be a Monday evening, sink full of dishes, empty fridge, no money for takeout kind of love. A hill that you’re not really sure ever ends kind of love. A favourite jumper in the wash kind of love. An incredibly inconvenient kind of love.. but pick me anyway. Every morning, pick me again. Choose me daily without pause or breath, make bad decisions after bad decisions and eventually let it all make sense. Let enough bad decisions turn into something worthwhile. Wake up next to me in three months time, brush the sleep out of my eyes and the rattiness out of my hair and think to yourself… ‘I cannot believe I ever thought this love was a bad idea’.”
- Isabella Dorta.
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I have never loved anyone the way I loved you,
and I don’t think I ever will
which is horrible and unfair on every person that will come after you
because,
god I loved you so much,
I gave you so much,
and you absolutely ruined it for anyone who’s going to come after you
because
I am so scared that they going to hurt me like you did
and
I don’t know how to ever gonna get over that.
isabella dorta
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By Isabella Dorta.
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