#is tj maxx beauty real

[elenablog]

Jewelry Hacks: Maximizing Your Collection on a Budget

Introduction

Jewelry has long been a symbol of elegance, self-expression, and personal style. It's a way to adorn oneself with beauty and meaning, but it's no secret that fine jewelry often comes with a hefty price tag. Fortunately, the world of affordable jewelry has seen a remarkable transformation in recent years, making it possible for everyone to embrace the allure of precious metals and gemstones without emptying their wallets. In this blog, we'll explore the growing trend of affordable jewelry, where to find it, and how to make the most of your budget while still shining brightly.

The Rise of Affordable Jewelry

Affordable jewelry, also known as fashion or costume jewelry, has become increasingly popular as a more accessible alternative to traditional fine jewelry. Its rise can be attributed to several factors:

Cost-Effective Materials: Unlike fine jewelry, which often uses precious metals like gold and platinum, affordable jewelry is crafted from less expensive materials such as stainless steel, brass, and alloys. These materials mimic the look of their expensive counterparts, allowing for more affordable pricing.

Cubic Zirconia and Simulated Gemstones: Instead of using genuine gemstones, affordable jewelry often features cubic zirconia and other simulated stones. These synthetic gems closely resemble the real thing in appearance but come at a fraction of the cost.

Trendy Designs: Affordable jewelry brands are quick to adapt to changing fashion trends, offering a wide variety of styles and designs. This allows consumers to stay stylish without making long-term commitments to expensive pieces.

Online Shopping: The convenience of online shopping has made it easier than ever to discover affordable jewelry. Online retailers can cut costs by avoiding the overhead expenses of brick-and-mortar stores, passing on the savings to customers.

Browse in-detail collections of Affordable Jewelry:- https://admirablejewels.com/

Where to Find Affordable Jewelry

Online Retailers: Websites like Amazon, Etsy, and eBay offer an extensive selection of affordable jewelry. You can browse a vast array of styles, materials, and price points from the comfort of your own home.

Local Boutiques: Many small, independent boutiques carry unique and affordable jewelry pieces. These boutiques often collaborate with local artisans, providing a platform for distinctive and one-of-a-kind creations.

Discount Stores: Discount retailers like TJ Maxx, Marshalls, and Ross frequently stock affordable jewelry collections. These stores offer name-brand pieces at significantly reduced prices.

Craft Fairs and Artisan Markets: Attending craft fairs and artisan markets is a great way to support local jewelry makers while finding affordable and unique pieces that reflect your personal style.

Tips for Making the Most of Your Budget

Set a Budget: Before embarking on your jewelry shopping journey, establish a clear budget. Knowing your spending limit will help you make informed choices and avoid impulsive purchases.

Mix and Match: Affordable jewelry allows you to experiment with different styles and combinations. Mix and match pieces to create your own unique look that complements your outfits and personality.

Quality over Quantity: While affordable jewelry is budget-friendly, it's essential to prioritize quality over quantity. Look for well-made pieces with sturdy clasps and durable materials to ensure they withstand daily wear.

Consider Versatility: Opt for versatile pieces that can be worn in various settings. A simple pair of hoop earrings or a classic pendant necklace can be dressed up or down to suit any occasion.

Care and Maintenance: Properly care for your affordable jewelry to extend its lifespan. Avoid exposing it to harsh chemicals, moisture, or direct sunlight, and store it in a jewelry box or pouch to prevent tangling and scratches.

Stay Informed: Keep an eye out for sales, discounts, and promotions from your favorite jewelry brands or stores. Sign up for newsletters or follow them on social media to stay informed about upcoming deals.

DIY Jewelry: If you're feeling creative, consider making your own jewelry. DIY kits and supplies are readily available, allowing you to craft unique pieces tailored to your taste.

Conclusion

Affordable jewelry is a fantastic way to enhance your style and express your personality without breaking the bank. With an abundance of options available both online and in stores, there's something for everyone. By setting a budget, choosing quality pieces, and exploring various sources, you can curate a jewelry collection that's not only stylish but also budget-friendly. Remember, the true value of jewelry lies in the sentiment and joy it brings, regardless of its price tag. So go ahead, embrace the world of affordable jewelry, and let your inner sparkle shine through.

[incorrect-pentagon]

No, don't do it, don't order 27 copies. I did that, and while part of me is like "hell yeah 😎", the other is "what have I done 😨". I mean, I have plans for them, but what if those plans don't work out??

I'm sure your plans will work out! I'm just afraid I'm gonna let down the dream falcons who worked so hard to send me a message subconsciously.

But perhaps you're right, and I should just be happy with the one album I have ordered for now.

[dksw0rld]

How To Be Boujie On A Budget

In this community, I see a lot of content about being boujie on a budget but then proceeding to talk about buying an $100 perfume or a $80 skin care product. Yes, I know that is budget-friendly for some but for others it’s not and that’s okay! This post is for the people who want to know some ways they can take care of themselves, look and feel good on a tighter budget!

1. Use Groupon 

Girl. If you aren’t using Groupon to get deals on facials, coolsculpting, nail salons, eyebrow waxing, Brazilian waxes, Pole Dancing classes, personal training sessions, etc. theeenn wyd?! Groupon is an amazing way to practice self- care and maintenance of yourself on a budget! Groupon always has deals catered to your specific location so if you don’t already use it, I’d advise getting on that ASAP!

2. TJ Maxx and Ross are your besties 

Listen. I don’t know about ya’ll but I will shop at a TJ Maxx or Ross before anything because they have amazing deals for high end stuff! Ever heard of fake it till’ you make it? If you can’t afford to walk into Louis Vuitton and buy whatever you want (for now) then there is absolutely nothing wrong with buying designer items or even designer look alikes from a discount store! **a little secret - I get all of my skincare from TJ Maxx and my skin is glowwiinngg honey!** I wish the stigma that it has to be bought from the actual designer source to count would go away or at least be talked about more. I’ll repeat it again. There is nothing wrong with getting designer stuff or anything from a discount store!! Being boujie on a budget that works for you is way smarter than trying to live outside of your means. There’s a fine line between acting as if and putting yourself in debt. You can look cute as hell getting your designer bag from TJ Maxx and still have money in your bank instead of yes, looking cute and expensive but having to eat at McDonald’s because you’re living outside of your means.  

3. Go to a Beauty School to get your hair done 

THIIISS ONNEEE!! Go to Google, look up beauty schools in your area and get your hair done on the low low. Like literally do it, You will thank me later! A lot of people don’t know this secret but it’s the holy grail for boujie on a budget! In my area, I go to a beauty school and get my hair done for $12 - $20 for the same services I would get at a salon for $50 - $70, and my hair looks just as good leaving the beauty school as it would leaving a higher end salon!! The only thing about beauty schools is you might have to tell them how you like your hair done but they’re students wanting to learn how to do all hair types, they are always open to learning and getting that real world experience! Important things to note here: yes, the person doing your hair would be a student, but they are seniors in their program which means they’re about to graduate and get a job at a salon if they don’t have one already. Two like I stated above, don’t be afraid to tell them how you like your hair washed, styled, etc. You get the most out of any appointment that way. If you’re too scared to do that then girl, you need to learn to be confident and speak up because it’s your hair someone is doing something to! Learn to advocate for yourself. Here’s a before and after pic I found online of someone going to a beauty school to get her hair done. Enough said LOL.

That’s it for now ladies! I hope this helped you, if it did, please feel free to send me a message letting me know so I can do more of these for you! Again, there is NOTHING wrong with being boujie on a budget! Work with what you got until you got more to work with!

-DK

[babbushka]

hi i haven’t been in the inbox in a bit but i had something to tel you okay okay so i went to marshalls and tj maxx to look for some decorations i found some really sweet hanukah decorations anyway i was wondering what you’d think flip would think of all the little decorations

Hello my dear anon! Please enjoy these headcanons! :)

Flip loves Hanukkah. He loves it more than most people might think. It was hard to tell with Flip sometimes, his scowling demeanor often gave him a resting angry face, when in reality, he's too focused on something to remember to smile.

That isn't the case with Hanukkah though, throughout the festival of lights, this detective is just about as smiley as can be.

This is especially true when he goes shopping for all the little decorations that the stores put out around this time of year.

Some of them get it right, and others don't, but it's always fun to see what's what.

When he was younger, he used to get annoyed that people equated Hanukkah as a "Jewish Christmas" because that's not what it is at all.

Seeing Santa Claus in blue velvet always rubbed him the wrong way, but now that he's an adult and knows that commercialism is as commercialism does, he can appreciate the humor in it.

One thing he'll never understand are the Hanukkah gnomes. Every time he sees one, he points it out to you, and then he hides it behind real Hanukkah decorations in the hopes that other people don't buy them.

As much as some stores really drop the ball -- one time Flip saw a Hanukkah pillow with Passover quotes on it and fully had to walk to the other side of the store -- sometimes they get it right.

He loves seeing the various menorahs, and all the beautiful designs that get released. He loves the novelty dreidels, and the ugly sweaters that have candles that light up.

Hanukkah isn't about the presents, it's not about the decorations, not really. But it's still a fun part of celebrating the holiday, so when Flip sees latke trays with puns on them next to beautifully ornate challah covers, he buys them both.

After all, his people didn't suffer through persecution for him to not indulge in the silly trinkets that make the Festival of Lights that much brighter!

Tagging some Flip lovin' friends! :)

@mochabucky @sacklerscumrag @artsymaddie @bitchydecisions @direnightshade @thembohux @kylorenswhxre @sunflowersinthesnow @babayagakeanu @safarigirlsp @steeevienicks @materialisthicc @hswritingrecs @rosi3ba3z @chapterhappygirl @loverofallthings @groovetoob @bxnnywriting @angel-bxby3 @smallgirlbigpersonality @lovelyyy-luna @2000andwhat @raddo1975 @cornmousequeen @ghoulishbehaviour @caillea @painttheskylineforme @holding-on-to-starwars @caitlin-was-here @icarusinthesea @princessflip @sweetlyours @mrs-gucci @baubub @bucky-j-barnes @beachwoodmonet @darkhairedmenrule @nekonaomitard @einmal-im-traum @justlenastuff @ohsolonelyghosts @depressedkyloren @pop-rocks-and-skittles @emi11ie @durangoninetyfive @itsallaboutkey @freshfruitforrottingvegetablez @valxntinex @adamdriversslut @ad-1119

[canvas-madness-txc]

Witch Tips

Canva can be used as an online altar maker if you use the banner design

Faux flowers (from Burlington, TJ Maxx and Marshalls, HobbyLobby) be used in place of real ones for spells if you can't grow any or can't have live plants.

If you know a craft store near you go there. Anything you could find there may have witchy value.

Canva could also be used as a shrine for a deity with the poster design.

WriterP is a free note-taking app that you can use as a digital grimore.

There are free candle apps on Playstore for people who can't actively buy or burn candles.

There are also free Phases of the Moon apps on Playstore for those who incorporate it into their craft.

If you want a wand but can't make one, there are Harry Potter merchandise wands you could buy. (Just don't support the author).

Pinterest has witchcraft resources (I'm putting this here: FACT CHECK EVERYTHING. I have seen pins for practices like Chakras and smudging. Don't use them if they don't apply to you)

Same applies for Tumblrs, Aminos, Facebooks, Discords, etc.

Burlington has essential oils in packs of 3 in the beauty section (the actual name is the Ladies section)

Buy some cheap Play Dough at Walmart or Five Below get a Sharpie and you have your own homemade Runes set.

Homegoods has teas, Crystals and salt lamps in one store. Also a specific brand of tea has a little container that comes with a crystal and has its meaning on the back.

Coins can be used as Divination for yes/ no Divination.

Shufflemacy can be a discreet for of Divination.

Some necklaces have Crystals on them.

Your spice cabinet probably has all the herbs you need.

Try taking up cooking and/ or gardening in order to have an excuse to get many herbs from a parent or guardian.

Feel free to add more to the list!

Remember: if not all of these help, use the ones that do. I can't tell you what to do with your craft. I'm just telling you what helped me so I can help you.

[discotenny]

!Spa Day!

Chuuya, Tachihara, Junichiro, and Twain spending a spa day with their significant other

I suppose there’s an implied fem reader with Chuuyas scenario. Love you too babie ❣️❣️

|Unedited|

!Requested by @girlwithsoftsound!

Chuuya

SELF. CARE. QWEEN!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Chuuya takes care of himself! And he’ll take care of you!

He’s already been having spa days before meeting you, so the first time you mention needing one he already has a plan laid out

Chuuya’s usual place to chase relaxation is a typical hotel with a spa built into it

The staff know him well enough, and greet the two of you at the door. While he’s a little upset that there’s no co-ed bathhouse, it’s all worth it when you come up to him afterwards and bring his cheek to your lips

You two move onto the massage area, holding hands as you both lay down on the beds

While waiting for the masseuses to arrive, you turned to Chuuya in your relaxed daze

“Thanks for this babe, I uh— had an awful day. I really needed this today.” You smile loosely at him, and you feel his thumb run over your knuckles

He moves up just enough to see your beautiful form, “I’ll do anything for you y/n, don’t forget that”

You both leave the spa with all tension and stress alleviated, and you take a moment to just rest on his bare chest before going to sleep

Chuuya’s snores fill your head as you tap your fingers along his body. Taking a deep breath of the now lavender smelling room, you smile to yourself and nuzzle into him more

Spa days are date nights and whatever you two decide to do, you bet you’ll come out of it relaxed af 

these weren’t really spa day hcs I’m sorry >.>

Tachihara

DIY SPA DAYYYY

You two find a 5 minute crafts video on top life hacks to achieve the perfect spa day

It takes Tachihara a while to get on board, as he wants to set himself up to be a manly man who don’t need no spa day

but everyone needs one at some point in their lives uwu

I’m sorry but it ends up being a fucking disaster

His apartment barely has half of the ingredients necessary to complete the tasks you want to do, so you resort to substituting literally half of them

Your DIY face scrub ends up looking more like cookie dough and some how smells burnt?

His bath tub is barely big enough for one person, and the romantic couple bath you dreamed of is gone

Tachihara laughs his ass off as you attempt to salvage what you created, your failed crafts providing a little too much entertainment to him

However, even he knows boundaries. As he goes to make fun of you again for screwing up your candle mixture, he sees tears stream down your face

Instantly, Tachihara forgets all previous failures and goes to comfort you

“I-I just wanted to spend a nice day with you, you asshole!” You lightly punch his sholder, attempting to bring him away

He can’t stand the sight of you in tears and strikes up an offer

As an apology, Tachihara takes you to a public bathhouse, as well as taking you to a restaurant afterwards :3

Junichiro

Naomi is the one that sets the whole day up

Having received one of those home spa kits that you find at TJ Maxx from Dazai [who didn’t know what to get her at all for Christmas], she decided to plan out a day for her and her brother

Of course, she extended the invitation to you as well. Coincidentally, you also received the same kit from Dazai too [turns out he bought all the women in the office the same gift]

Junichiro is the only one not dressed in a fluffy robe, and he tries to assure you and Naomi that it’s fine if he can’t participate

You pull him back however, begging him to take part in the spa day

With the two most important women in the world to him begging him to stay, how could he possibly refuse?

Naomi helps you and Junichiro put on your masks, and you’re tasked with helping your boyfriend put body cream all over his figure

After Naomi gets out of the bath, you and Junichiro take her place

By then, he’s decked out in an avocado clay face mask, hair tied up and out of his eyes, shoulders covered in body scrub, and he’s smelling like mint. You’re relatively the same way

As you two get in the bath, you assist each other in washing off all the product

He’s feeling great

“Hey Y/n”

You perk up, stopping the scrubbing of his back

“Thanks for today,” and with that, your boyfriend turns around and kisses you, pushing you into the tub

You would squeal if his mouth didn’t cover yours

Though you both would like to continue, Naomi is waiting outside :3

Twain

Okay so a spa day with Twain is sort of like a spa day with Tachihara, except things actually go moderately well???

Don’t get me wrong Twain knows nothing on relaxation, but he’s really into creating his own masks, candles, scrubs, etc.

Due to this, you end up with a lot of extra spa goodies

Most of the fun that day comes out of your little DIY session with your boyfriend

When it comes to the actual ‘spa treatment,’ it’s hard to keep him still

He’ll splash water at you in the bath, complain about the temperature, and attempt to eat the face mask he made

Twain is shoving snacks into his face, getting crumbs all over you and him

It’s really hard to catch relaxation with him around

Eventually he’ll get puckered out and just fall asleep next to you

Then you can finally enjoy all the goodies you two made together uwu

But you should get him out of the bath before he ends up looking like a prune

These are bad I’m sorry babs >.< The only one that could be considered a real spa day were Junichiro and Chuuya’s because they actually got their shit together lol. Also is it Junichiro or Junichirou? I’ve seen both

In any case, Enjoy ~~

Lmao so I tried looking up Japanese spa practices for this request and now my search results are filled with couples getaway locations help

[sugarbutterbroadway]

Davey Mine

A/n This is the sequel to Paint The Sky and I hope you guys enjoy it! if you do, a reblog or a comment can go a long way :)

October 12th. October 12th, 2025. October 12th 2025 at 4pm. October 12th, 4pm at Oheka Castle on Long island. Jack could hardly breathe. He was getting married today. He was getting married today at 4pm. He was getting married today at a castle! A real life castle,where he was getting married. To Davey. His Davey. His Davey, who smiled too wide and kissed too rough and was currently kicking ass as a High School History teacher. His Davey who reserved those gentle eyes for him,Les and their puppy Luna. His Davey who still functioned entirely on coffee and got excited when they passed the home goods section in TJ Maxx.  His Davey who had gotten down on one knee two years prior, and asked him to marry him. 

His Davey who he said no to at first because he thought it was a joke, he still cringed at the memory. His Davey who he wasn’t allowed to see until the ceremony and it was driving him crazy. He had tried to run out of his room multiple times but was tackled to the ground each time by Spot,Race and even Katherine.

Then he was put on house arrest. He wasn’t allowed to leave this room until it was time to walk down the aisle.

And he was bored! He was bored and lonely because everyone was too busy to entertain him. Medda was checking the guest books,Race was probably off doing god knows what with Spot,Charlie was working on the floral arrangements,Katherine was making sure the catering was taken care of and Sarah was with Davey. Elmer,Finch,Albert and Romeo were driving up from the city while JoJo and Specs were flying from California. Buttons,Henry and Mush had flown in from Europe the night prior. Skittery only lived a town or two over so he’d be arriving with the other guests. So he wondered how he had a small army on the way and he still felt so lonely. Realistically he knew why, he only wanted to see his fiance and all that mushy shit, but it was getting ridiculous. He had a few hours to waste before he could see Davey, see him and kiss him and get to be Mr. Jack Kelly-Jacobs. He smiled, he couldn’t wait to call himself that. He could at least try to appreciate the place he was staying in, it was gorgeous. 

Davey had really gone the extra mile--even though Jack had assured him he would be fine getting married in a horse stable as long as it meant marrying him--but Davey had just kissed his cheek and promised that it would be a dream come true. And it was, the bed in his room was absolutely gigantic, and he--though he was told several times not to--still had the urge to do somersaults on it.

 The windows were huge and the curtains felt more expensive than anything he could afford, it still made his stomach turn to think about how much money went into this. It was expensive, but weddings only happened once so it was fine, it would be fine, he just needed to stop thinking about it. His favorite part had to be the crowns, Davey had got them matching crowns in gold and silver, and they were to die for. Jack never really had expensive taste, that was all Race, but if Davey kept spoiling him like this he just might turn. His suit hung near the window, a crimson red color embroidered with gold. This thankfully didn’t cost him a dime, Medda was more than happy to make it for him. He offered to pay multiple times but she said seeing him happy was more than enough. It was a beautiful suit, it looked professional. Sure back in her college days she worked on costumes in the theatre but this, she had truly outdone herself. It fit him like a glove and made him feel like a million bucks.

 And the locket, how could he forget about the locket? It was a gold painted locket made by Sarah and he’d been wearing it for weeks. On both sides were pictures of them. One in first grade and the other at their engagement party. He fell in love with the locket immediately and made a secret promise to never keep it out of his sight. It made him a little teary eyed to think of how excited six year old Jack would have been to see all of this. How timid he would’ve been to touch anything lest he break it and get his hide torn up by one of the orphanage workers. Jack grimaced and out of spite ran his hands along everything in the room, he was done being afraid. After he had touched every little trinket in the room he flopped back on the bed with a groan. Someone needed to come entertain him soon before his mind started wandering and he had a breakdown.

-

He was left to his own devices for a little more than an hour before someone came--well multiple someone’s came, and they came in a pack. There was a knock and Jack had barely said ‘come in’ before the boys barged in.

“Hey!-”

“Congratulations, Jack!”the chorus rang, and soon enough he was being pulled on by a different set of arms trying to hug him. He didn’t want to be dramatic, but he was an affectionate man and it felt amazing to hug some of the friends he hadn’t seen in years. They all looked damn good too, wearing the matching robes that Katherine had insisted on. JoJo with always the widest grin pulled Jack into another hug.

“I always knew it would be Davey,”JoJo whispered, before pulling away. Next he was passed onto Buttons, and boy did Jack have a lot to say.

“Benjamin Buttons”He teased and was met with a shove to his shoulders. He laughed and against Button’s will pulled him in for a bear hug.

“Yeah yeah it’s good to see you too”Buttons said, muffled by Jack’s shirt.

“Oh stop gripin”He scoffed, “I ain’t seen you since we graduated”

“That ain’t my fault”Buttons said, “I see a scholarship, I take it”

Jack rolled his eyes, “Yeah, all the way in Scotland. So tell me, any pretty girls caught your eye?”

“Jack, I'm crushed,”Buttons said, but his eyes twinkled with mischief. “You know the only girl I got eyes for is JoJo”

“Hey, listen here you litt-”

The group quickly dissolved into high school level chaos and Jack felt at home. It reminded him of day’s in the living room at Medda’s taken for granted. Sure he was happy to be out of high school, but he couldn’t help but miss it. It’s like someone yelled ‘scatter!’ the second they graduated and they all split up across the globe. He knew it would happen--he was there for every single acceptance letter, but it hadn’t sunk in until it was only him,Davey,Spot and Race left right where they started.

 JoJo had moved out to California to pursue acting,Specs had moved out there for UCLA. Elmer had gone to culinary school,Finch had moved for college,Albert was his roommate so he went too and Romeo got a job at one of Medda’s theaters. Buttons had moved to Scotland for school, while Henry and Mush had moved to London just for the adventure. And Skittery, he was moving up to Massachusetts for college too the following year. Jack was proud, it made his heart burst to think of how far some of them came--how far he had come himself. But he would always find himself thinking about when times were easier, when they were younger and vibrating with untapped potential. He had a hard time living in the moment, he was just always thinking. But he was trying, and he would try his hardest today because he didn’t want to look back and remember his wedding being a blur.

“Any of you smell smoke?”Race teased, and Jack blinked. Once, then twice, because when did Race get in here? And where has he been all morning?

“huh?”Jack asked.

“You were just thinkin so hard that...ah forget it, you missed the joke”Race waved dismissively. “The boys called me in cause you were lookin pale, you got cold feet? Cause I can sneak you out the wind-”

“No”He said, scrunching up his face. That was the last thing he wanted to do, he just wanted to see Davey.

“Then what is it?”Race asked, “You look really serious, it’s kind of concerning”

“I just...I was just thinking about how much I love all of you--not you,Race--but just all of you guys” He said, gesturing to the guests. He ignored Race’s squawk of indignation and continued. “Some of you I met freshman year,some of you I’ve known since the refuge and some of you I met in Juvie” Mush,Finch and Albert ducked their heads, but they were snickering. “I don’t know how to explain this but...we had adults tellin us we weren’t gonna do shit with our lives, and just look at us. We all got jobs,we’re all payin the bills and most of all we’re happy. I guess that’s just somethin to think about”

“Jack Kelly the sap”Mush said, though he was grinning.

“We love you too, Jack”Specs said, giving Mush the side eye. “Some of us are better at expressing that than others”

“We’re all really happy for you”Finch said, “I mean you and Davey were meant to be”

“Like some queer Disney movie”

“Yeah yeah! Exactly like some queer Disney movie!”

“Except more drama”

“Way more drama-”

“-and less magic-”

“-I mean depends on what we consider magic-”

“Alright”Jack groaned, rubbing his temples. “You guys couldn’t focus on one topic if you had a gun to your head”

“It’s really hard,”Albert said, nodding slowly. “I would know”

Jack blinked.“I...you worry me, Al”He said, “Race, collect your best friend before he gives me a heart attack”

“Why don’t you go ask your other brother?”Race scoffed, “The one who you obviously love”

Jack rolled his eyes. “First of all, you know I love you. Second of all, you’re my best man, so do what I say”

“Alright bridezilla”Race muttered, “C’mon, Albie. Let’s go”

“Goodbye!”Albert said, waving to everyone on the way out. Once he was gone Jack buried his head in his hands.

“God I love that kid, but how does he have a bio-engineering degree?”

“I don’t know”

“Beats me”

“I ask myself that everyday”

-

Jack had made a grave mistake. He started this day off begging for it to move faster but now that the anxiety set in, he just wanted everything to slow down. He spent about a little over an hour just chilling with the boys, before Katherine,Charlie,Medda and Sarah burst into the room saying it was time to get ready. Maybe time did fly when you were having fun because the clock that once read 1:15pm now read 2:45pm. He would be seeing Davey in less than two hours. His eyes widened. He would be seeing Davey in less than two hours. Oh god what if this was a mistake? What if the red suit was too much? He didn’t even know what color Davey was wearing. What if he stood out too much? Would Davey’s family like it? Would Davey like it? He squeezed Katherine’s hand as Medda combed and trimmed his hair. It was comforting to have his mom do this for him, but he was still absolutely shaking.

“Take deep breaths with me”Katherine said. He nodded and he tried but his diaphragm was spasming and he felt like he was going to have an anxiety attack. He’d been waiting two years for this day, what if it wasn’t perfect? What if he let Davey down somehow? Oh god. What if they got to the arbor and Davey realized it was a mistake? What if somebody objected? What if-

“Jack,”Katherine said calmly. “You’re not breathing.”

“I’m sorry”He whimpered. He wanted to cry, just a little bit to get it out of his system. But he had foundation on and he’d be damned if he had to sit there and get it applied again.

“Everything is going to plan”She said, rubbing his hand. “The cake is here,the flowers look great,seating charts are at the venue,everyone in both parties are accounted for and catering is on schedule.”

“How is Davey?”he asked, his voice was wobbly. Oh no, he was going to cry.

“Davey is doing just fine”She said, he let out a sigh of relief. “Sarah runs a tight ship”

“Wouldn’t you know, Mrs.Jacobs-Plumber?”He teased.

“Ah, shut up”She said with a smile. “It’s your turn to become a Jacobs now”

“Isn’t that crazy?”He said, “We both dated, and now we both married into the same family”

“I try not to think about it”She said, “And you shouldn’t either, keep your eyes on your Husband”

His husband. Today he got to officially call Davey his husband. God he missed Davey.

“Katherine”he said, sweetly. A little too sweetly. 

“Yes?”She asked, with narrowed eyes.

“Can I please call Davey-”

“Nope”She said, shaking her head.

“Why!”He whined.

“Because it’s bad luck!”She exclaimed, Medda and Charlie hummed in agreement. Jack scoffed, what would Charlie know? He was only twenty-one, and single.

“It’s bad luck if I see him,”He stressed. “I just wanna talk to him”

“No”

“Please”

“No”

“Please”

“No”

“Ple-”

“No!”She snapped. “There is no talking to Davey until your ass is under that arch.”

“Mommy!”He whined, tilting his head to look up at Medda. She simply shrugged.

“I don’t know what to tell you, baby”Medda said, “You put Katherine in charge, not me”

“Grave mistake, Kelly”Charlie smirked, from the couch he was lounging on.

“You’re a little shit”He said. Medda thumped the back of his head and he winced.

“Don’t talk about my Charlie like that,”Medda warned.

“I’m mama’s favorite”Charlie taunted. She gave him a look and he immediately sunk back into the couch.

“I don’t have a favorite”She said, “I adopted you all for a reason. Jack, you’re done baby. Charlie, you’re up next”

Charlie shifted off the couch and limped over, not before receiving a smack to the back of his head from Jack. he went to strike back but Jack jumped out of the way.

“It’s my wedding day”He said, “you bruise me, it’s game over”

Charlie grumbled to himself and sat down in the styling chair. Jack discreetly tucked his phone into his pocket and announced he was going to the bathroom. Once he was safely inside he locked the door and sat in front of it for good measure before tapping Davey’s contact. With the phone pressed against his ear he waited. It rang for what felt like eternity before it went through.

“Hey, sweetheart”

Jack’s eyes fluttered closed and he let out a happy sigh. “Davey”

There was a laugh from the other end. “That bad, huh?”

“They’ve been treatin me like an animal”He whined. “I’ve been locked in this room since yesterday and i’m not allowed out until the ceremony”

“Aww my poor Jackie”Davey cooed, “I heard you tried to run, rookie mistake”

“Sarah is faster than she looks”He grumbled, “So is Charlie”

“Like that leg would stop him”Davey laughed, “He’s been dead weight since the day I met him”

“God, I remember he used to love when you came over”He grinned, leaning his head against the door. “Always wanted to know when Davey was coming to play”

“That seems just like yesterday”Davey said, “I remember those matching overalls Medda used to make you guys wear-”

“Don’t remind me”He groaned, “We’ll call that a lapse in judgement and a product of the early 2000’s.”

“Call it whatever you want, it was adorable.”Davey teased.

“Yeah yeah we was perfect cherubs”He said, “But listen, I don’t have much time. They think i’m just using the bathroom. I was feelin a little anxious and I just wanted to hear your voice, ya know? You ground me”

“And you ground me”Davey said, Jack could just tell he was grinning. “I gotta get back soon anyways, I'm in the garden. But I love you, Jackie and I can’t wait to marry you”

His breath hitched. “S-say it again, Davey”

“I love you”Davey said in a sing-song way, “I love you I love you I love you”

“I love you too, Davey mine”he whispered, a tear slid down his face. “And I-I can’t wait to be your husband”

“Don’t cry, Jackie”Davey said, “You’ll make me cry and then we’ll both be inconsolable messes”

He laughed just a little watery and nodded, “Yeah, we should cut this short before I burst into flames. I love you”

“I love you, see you soon”

With that the line went dead and Jack took a deep breath. How Davey managed to make him a blubbering mess anytime they talked was still unknown to this day. Being in Davey’s presence just made you want to bare your soul for him because he would see right through you anyways. His eyes were intense and his voice was more calming than any lullaby Jack had ever heard and the words he spoke felt like worship. Jack sighed and dapped at his face with a tissue. He was already a wreck and he hadn’t even stepped foot down the aisle.

-

In the far wing of the castle things were running smoothly, Davey and Sarah made certain of it. Call it twin telepathy or just amazing organization skills, but not a thing was out of place. They were running right on schedule. Sarah desperately wanted Davey to sit down and at least take a bit of a break but he was always a control freak, and it seemed that was never going to change. He wanted to know everything that was happening. Who was doing what,who was being seated at each table,what the playlist looked like,what alcohol would be served, it was the only thing keeping him from having a nervous breakdown.

 And Sarah caved, promising to give him hourly updates on how things were going. Those things included Jack. He was more than annoyed that they left Jack all alone for so long, it didn’t sit well with him. He would have marched right over there himself if Sarah hadn’t been watching him like a hawk. She’d cave for everything else, but no seeing Jack before the wedding. Davey did the same thing for her wedding, so it felt like it was coming more from a place of revenge than a place of love.

Besides the minor slip, he was excited. He’d been waiting to say ‘I do’ from the minute Jack said yes. He loved Jack, he loved him more than he could ever imagine. That was his best friend,his soulmate, and he had been there for everything. He was there when Davey learned how to ride a bike, he was there for Davey’s piano recitals,his soccer matches,his debate meets, everything. He was the first one Davey had come out, not even Sarah had known at that point. He was there and he held Davey while he cried and they brainstormed a way to tell his family. He couldn’t remember a time in his life before that beautiful whirlwind known as Jack Kelly, he didn’t want to know a time after it. 

He was good with his words so sometimes they come cheap but when he looked into Jack’s eyes and promised forever, he meant it. And he’ll mean it today and tomorrow and everyday to come, because he loved Jack. He could tell him all day long--he wanted to tell him all day long. He wanted to run right out of this room and tackle him to the floor in a flurry of kisses. He wanted to be at home,on their couch with Luna on his lap listening to Jack read to him. But he promised Jack fairytale and Jack was going to get fairytale if it killed him.

“You’re thinking hard, Davey”Sarah said softly, “What’s going on up there?”

“I…”He started, then chuckled despite himself. “I’m just thinking about how much I love him. When I think about him, it all sounds so good in my head and on paper, but then I look at him and I melt”

“That’s love if I've ever seen it”She said, fiddling with her hair in the mirror. “The kind that Mom and Dad have”

“That’s sweet, Saz”He smiled, “I don't know he...he just makes me speechless”

“Save it for your vows”She said playfully, “I’m not the one you have to pour your heart out to, he is”

“I get it, I talk a lot”He said rolling his eyes, “Sue me”

“Hey”She said, pointing a finger at him in the mirror. “Don’t push it, my wife’s a lawyer”

“I know I know”he said, “You only take every possible opportunity to remind me of it”

“It’s what I'm best at,”She said with a wink, “You need to start getting ready, like now. It’s already 3:30pm and guests are arriving at 4pm”

“Oh shit”He cursed, jumping up from his seat. “Out out out!”

“Alright!”She exclaimed, grabbing her brush off the vanity. “Come get me when you’re dressed, you’re not going out with your hair looking like that-”

“Yes, I know”He stressed, pushing her out the door. “But I gotta get dressed, immediately. Love you, bye!”

Davey shut the door behind him and ran a hand over his face. It would be fine, he had thirty minutes and getting dressed would take him no longer than ten. He reached for his suit folded over the vanity chair and sighed. He could do this, he’d be seeing Jack in an hour, then they’d get to go home and sleep in peace. He couldn’t wait to lock himself in the suite, and consummate the marriage til the cows came home.

He smirked a bit, if it meant that then he could definitely do this.

-

Jack leaned in to look at himself in the bathroom mirror. He wanted to get dressed in private, and Katherine granted him that luxury. He felt, he felt handsome. No, not just handsome. He felt beautiful, he’s not sure what he was worried about. The suit looked just as good as the day he tried it on and the gold shimmered in the bathroom lights, he paused, this was a really nice bathroom. He turned around inspecting the trousers and smirked, his ass looked fantastic if he did say so himself. He wiggled his hips a bit and shot himself a cheesy grin, he was starting to feel more like himself. He felt confident. He grabbed the crown that was sitting on the counter and gently placed it on his head. It had felt silly the first few times he tried it on, but now, it just felt right. He gently tucked his gold locket inside of his shirt, that was only for him to see and he wanted it as close to his heart as possible. He took one last look at himself before exiting the bathroom.

“The future prince has arrived”He announced as he stepped out onto the marble floor. All eyes were on him.. He walked out a bit further waiting for a reaction, but none came. His heart stuttered a bit, he knew it. He knew that they would hate it.

“Do...do you guys like it?”He asked quietly. In place of an answer Medda came forward and wrapped her arms around him. He was pulled flush against her chest and she just hugged him tight.

“You look stunning, Jack”She whispered, “Absolutely stunning”

“Thank you, mama”He said, with a shaky exhale. He felt a bit better, Medda didn’t lie. His knees weakened a bit and she held him tighter. The comments soon flooded after Medda’s approval.

“You look amazing, Jack!”Katherine squealed, “you look expensive!”

“I feel expensive,”He chuckled. He walked over to Charlie who had a dopey grin on his face,

“You clean up well, kid”He said, tousling the dirty blonde hair.  Charlie groaned and pulled Jack down for a hug.

“You look good, Jack”Charlie grinned, patting his back.

“So do you”He said, “Try and let me have the spotlight for once”

“In your dreams, Kelly”Charlie said, thumping his temple. He laughed and pulled Katherine into a quick hug, kissing her cheek.

“If you told me this was the same Jack Kelly who took me on a date to Wendy’s in eighth grade I wouldn’t believe you!”She teased, squeezing him extra tight. “Just look at you! God, Medda did amazing work because this fits you perfectly”

“Thank you, Kathy,”He said, swaying them side to side. The last one for a hug was Race. He looked at Jack expectantly with open arms and tears brimming at the corner of his eyes. Once Jack was within arms length he pulled him in and the tears began to fall.

“Fuck”Race choked out, “I promised myself I wouldn’t cry but, this...this is real Jack. This is happening, you’re getting married”

“Aww, Racer”He soothed, rubbing his back. “I’m getting married but I ain’t goin nowhere, promise”

“Y-you promise you’re always going to be my big brother?”Race croaked.

“I promise”He said, “We’ve been brothers since the beginning, I ain’t goin nowhere”

“Good”Race sniffled, attempting to compose himself. “Oh fucking hell-”

“Language,”Medda said, pointing a finger. “You may be grown but i’m still your mother”

He had the nerve to look a bit bashful. “Sorry, ma. It’s just...it’s hard to think of you as someone other than my big brother, ya know? It’s weird that you have a life”

“Thanks”He said flatly.

“That’s not what I meant!”Race whined. “Just...you look spectacular,Davey’s gonna love it and i’m so happy for you”

“It means a lot, Racer”He said, “Honest.”

“Just you wait”Race said, wiping his eyes. “I got a whole best man speech prepared for the reception, it’s gonna be great”

“I have no doubts”He said, “But, we all gotta get a move on it. Guests are starting to arrive and Charlie and Ma are the only one’s dressed.”

Katherine sighed and grabbed her purse off his bed. “You better not try to escape, Kelly. We will find you”

“Yeah yeah, get out!”He said, ushering her and Racetrack out the door. The sooner they got dressed,the sooner they could get this party started. He turned to face Medda and let out a giddy laugh.

“We were so focused on me, but look at you!”He said, “You look beautiful Ma”

“Aw you don’t gotta butter me up Jack”She waved off, “I already adopted you.”

“I mean it!”He exclaimed with wide eyes, “Charlie, doesn’t Ma look beautiful?”

“Absolutely gorgeous!”Charlie said from the couch he was lounging on.

“See?”He said, cocking his hip. “Two against one”

She smiled and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Thank you, baby. I need to be on my way now too, your aunts are here”

“Auntie Esther and Estelle?”Charlie said. Medda nodded.

“I’m coming with you! They always have candy”

“Well come on!”She said, “you know they don’t like being kept waiting”

He pushed himself off the couch and Medda grabbed his crutch off the table handing it to him. He wasn’t too pleased about it, but he would be on his feet for the majority of the day.

“I just want them to hack this fucker off”Charlie grumbled, shoving the crutch under his armpit. Jack frowned a bit, and put an arm on Charlie’s shoulder. Medda took that as a sign to leave with a promise that she would be waiting outside the door.

“It’s only for the ceremony, we just want you to be comfortable”He said softly. “And one of these days it’ll happen, I know it will”

Charlie shot him a crooked smile and shook his head. “Optimism isn’t your venue, Jack. I’ll rant to Elmer later”

“Hey, it’s my job as big brother to at least try and sugarcoat the bullshit”He chuckled, “But seriously Charlie, tell me if you’re uncomfortable. You can sit-”

“No”Charlie said, “No, I wanna stand. It’s the least I can do for you, ya know. Since the minute I step out there everyone’s eyes will all be on me, gotta make it up somehow”

“Yeah, you’re a real peach”He said, rolling his eyes.

“A georgia one!”Charlie called over his shoulder as he left the room. Jack took this time to try and get the butterflies in his stomach under control. He was excited, so excited he might puke. He paused. Or did that mean he was nervous? He had no idea, he just knew that the minute Katherine entered this room, it would be time. That time came sooner than he thought because less than fifteen minutes later Katherine came bursting into the room wearing a champagne colored bridesmaid gown.

“It’s time, Jack!”She squealed. He nodded. It was time. His eyes widened.

Holy shit.

It was time.

“Are you ready to see your groom?”She asked, offering him her arm. With a shaky breath he nodded and looped his in hers.

“I’m ready”

-

The venue was perfect, picture perfect even. It was unseasonably warm for October. The sun was shining through the autumn leaves and the air was still and dry. Not a drop of rain in sight from the clear blue skies above. Jack could hardly believe their luck, it had been storming the week prior and he had been so nervous. He also felt a bit ridiculous, him and Medda were hidden behind a bush because she wanted his big reveal to be a surprise to everyone. He didn’t care about that, he wanted to see what was going on! And most of all he wanted to see Davey, their little phone call was only holding him over for so long. He grumbled quietly with only a stern look as warning to be patient. He was shocked out of his stupor when the music started.

It was almost time.

He peeked over the side as their many groomsman paired off together, sure he remembered from the many dress rehearsals--a theatre mom wants perfection--but seeing his friends dressed so smart made him want to laugh and cry all at once. They had all come here for him today, in the middle of October, just to see him getting married. He pouted a bit and placed a hand over his heart, it was touching. His smile only widened as he saw JoJo and Buttons walking hand in hand instead of arm and arm. Maybe Jack could do a little matchmaking of his own and get them to spill the truth. It took awhile for everyone to get down there, with over ten groomsmen of his own and not even counting some of Davey’s friends, it was a process. His heart stopped when he saw Katherine walking down the aisle with...was that Luna? He turned to Medda with wide eyes about to scream but she just laughed to herself and hushed him.

“Surprise”She whispered. He grinned, of course Davey couldn’t leave their baby out of this.

The wedding march soon drifted into the lantern song instrumental and Jack knew it was time. Without a word he gripped Medda’s arm and stepped out into the open. The applause were deafening but all he could focus on was Davey. There he was dressed in a purely white suit,silver crown on his head and his own silver locket hanging proudly on display. He looked regal, he looked like a prince. But his head was down, without thinking Jack whistled at him and snapped his finger, because hello, he was here now. Davey’s head snapped up and the minute his eyes caught Jacks, the dam exploded. His knees grew weak and he squatted down with tears blurring his eyes.

“O-oh my god”he stuttered, covering his mouth. Jack looked angelic, covered in red and gold from head to toe. This was the man he was about to marry, this was him. Sarah placed a hand under his arm and hoisted him up, letting him lean on her for comfort. How was expected to stand tall when Jack Kelly could bring anyone to their knees? He was blubbering like an absolute idiot but he didn’t care because now Jack was right in front of him. He quickly wiped his eyes and mumbled a quick apology because that was definitely not supposed to happen.

“I-you look-hi”He said. 

“You look pretty hi yourself”Jack smirked. He blushed and shot their officiator--Jack’s friend Blink--a withering look. He seemed to snicker before lifting his hands to silence the guests chatter.

“Friends and Family”He started, then stopped when Jack outright laughed.

“Problem?”He said, raising a brow.

“ ‘m sorry, i’ve just never heard you sound so serious”Jack said, “i’m okay now though, please continue”

Blink rolled his eyes and mumbled something that sounded akin to cursing, He cleared his throat and started again. “Friends and family, we are gathered here today to celebrate the once in a lifetime bond known as Jack and David. And if you couldn’t tell, this will be anything but serious so if that’s what you were expecting, I’m sorry”

A few of the guests laughed and Davey felt much better. Sure he liked serious but he didn’t like stuffy.

“Now, Jack told me that he wanted me to talk as little as possible so I will try to do that”He continued, “But this man right here is like a brother to me, so I make no promises. Marriage is a beautiful thing, but only if both parties are willing. So Davey, please let me know that Jack didn’t bring you here against your will”

Davey let out a startled laugh and shook his head, “I’m the one who proposed, so no”

“I just needed to make sure, we all know he can be a bit pushy”he smirked, “But in all seriousness, marriage is beautiful, a everlasting blond between two people pledging themselves to each other for life.”He paused, “I can admit it is a little culty sounding but beautiful. And as beautiful as it is, it is a commitment. That means sticking by each other's side through the highs and lows and everything that comes in between. Understood?”

“Crystal clear”Davey said.

“Absolutely”Jack said, giving Davey the once over, eyes twinkling.

“This is usually the point where I would ask if anyone has any objections but I think I'll get speared like a shish kebob if I do, so we’ll be skipping that part.”He said, Jack hummed in agreement and reached down to grab Davey’s hand. He was practically vibrating in his skin with mirth, it was a moment Davey wanted to keep forever. “Now I heard from a little birdy, that Davey had a pretty lengthy speech written, so I think it’s best we get straight into the vows”

Right, his vows, that was something that he had to say at some point. He didn’t necessarily have stage fright, but something about all of his loved ones staring,waiting for him to pour out his heart made him feel jittery. He grabbed Jack’s other hand and squeezed it, he didn’t have to look at them. He could just look at Jack and pretend it was only them. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and tried to relax. He could do this.

“I just wanna start this off by saying, I love you. I can never say this enough and I will never get tired of saying it, so. I love you.”He said, running his thumb over Jack’s hand. “You snuck up on me, Jack Kelly. I never saw it coming, but now I can’t imagine my life without you. You always talk about how much i’ve been there for you, but now it’s time for me to talk about how much you’ve been there for me. You may not know this but, you were my rock. You were the one that kept me together, when classes and clubs became too much and I had to work and then go home and take care of Les. I constantly felt like I was falling apart, but just knowing I got to spend time with you made me smile.I was in a dark place for a while, I felt like I was failing everyone around me, like I wasn’t smart enough, like I wasn't good enough. And I hid it, because I was embarrassed that my own brain was even failing me.”

His eyes met his parents in the crowd and he faltered. He’d never told them that and now he couldn’t wait to have their distressed faces playing on a loop in his head for the rest of eternity.

 “I um, I remember even before we were dating I was just so drained that I didn’t come into school, I just laid in bed staring at nothing. You didn’t call or shoot me a text, you showed up outside of my house and scaled the side of it when I didn’t answer the door. You tumbled in through the window,climbed into bed with me and just started listing every reason why you were proud of me, and I sobbed, ugly sobbed. That was the first time I wanted to say I love you”

He shuddered and tried to compose himself, he could do this. He promised himself he wouldn’t completely break down today.

“And I’ve never wanted to stop saying it since, it ran rampant through my mind until that day at the park where I just blurted it out. Lucky for us, Sarah got that moment on camera”

He gave a subtle nod to blink who pointed a remote at the projector in front of them. On a white screen behind them there they were younger but still so in love, August 14th of 2019. He pressed another button and the video started to play. Jack gasped and leaned in closer as the memory came to life.

“I love you”Jack whispered, bringing a hand up to cup Davey’s cheek. “I love you, Davey. I...this is hard for me, really fucking hard. Kids like me don’t get fairytale”

“No, they don’t”Davey chuckled, blinking away a tear. “But they deserve it, and you deserve it”

“You really are my prince”Jack grinned, “My prince Davey”

Davey brought his own hand up and tapped Jack’s ring finger. “And one day i’ll make you a Prince too. I’m in this for as long as you want me”

“What if I want you forever?”

“Then i’ll stay forever”

“Can you please, kiss already!’Katherine exclaimed, breaking through the veil of privacy. “I mean honestly, we’re all waiting for it!”

The video ended abruptly with an unflattering shot of Race and Spot crying in the canopy and Jack was in hysterics. The guests were practically shaking the ground from how loud they were stomping and clapping. But no one was laughing louder than Race himself.

“That’s what I used to look like!”Race cried out.

“You still look like that,”Jack snorted. Davey shook his head and continued.

“I know this is long already but I'm surprisingly not done”He said, ignoring the groan from practically everyone. “I’m hoping I made good on my promise”He grins, “Because you deserve all of this Jack, and you deserve the best version of myself I can be. I promise to stay by your side through calm seas or choppy waters, I promise to be as patient as I can when things get hard, and I promise to love you entirely for as long as I live. I know things are going to get rough and we are definitely going to fight, but looking at the amazing support we have from both sides. I’m not worried. In sickness and in health, til death do us part Jackie”

“Oh fuck you”Jack gasped, then quickly covered his mouth. “That was...I’m expected to compete with that?”

“Yes, now speak”Blink smirked. Jack resisted the urge to give him the finger and instead faced the guests.

“Don’t expect that same thing from me”He said looking towards the guests, “He minored in English.”He got a few laughs out of them and continued. “I guess this is less of a vow and more of a thank you. Thank you Davey, for seeing the best in me, when nobody else would. Now everyone who knows me knows I love my theatrics, blame my mother, she works for a theatre!”he said in a sing-song voice. “So, I have a little story. I was your typical class clown in school, I was always in the office,always gettin in trouble and always fighting. Those staff members didn’t care, they just wrote me off as some delinquent, and gave up on me. No one took the time of day to see what was actually going on, but Davey tried. And I wouldn’t let him in, I was so scared he would look at me differently, so I just kept it all in here”He said pointing to his chest.

“The final straw was when I went to juvie--oh don’t act surprised! Some of you were there with me!”he scolded. Albert and Mush put their heads down once again.  “I was gone for two months, and he had no idea where I was, no one would tell him. The day I got out we got into the biggest fight in our lives. I’m talkin movie type fight, we was both screamin and throwing things. And I was just running my mouth, saying that he would never understand and I remember him just shouting--imagine Davey shouting--he shouted ‘I can’t understand if you don’t tell me you idiot!”

“Oh my god”Davey chuckled, running a hand over his face. Jack giggled and laced their hands together.

“That was like a lightbulb moment for me. We sat on the roof of my house and I told him everything there was to know about me, from beginning to end. And that made our bond even stronger.” He said. “I love him because he looked at me when I was at my worst and meanest and decided I was still worthy of being treated like a person. I love him because even when we fight it’s just because he wants what’s best for me, even when I'm being stubborn. Being loved by Davey has made me swallow a lot of humble pie in my life and I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

He turned to face Davey, and wiped a stray tear off his cheek.

“Davey mine”He started, “I promise to take Luna on walks in the morning because you like to sleep in. I promise to be there for you however I can be and I promise to love you unconditionally because you do the same for me. Til death do us part, baby”

“Til death do us part”Davey repeated, starry eyed.

“Hey hey hey!”Blink scolded, waving his hands. “You’re doing my job for me, at least let me try to look professional!”

“Go on then”Jack said, waving him off.

“Do you, David Jacobs, take Jack Kelly to be your lawfully wedded husband?”Blink said.

“I do”Davey said.

“Do you, Jack Kelly, take David Jacobs to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“Hell yes”Jack said, staring at Davey’s lips. He was ready to go in for the kill.

“Then by the power invested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husbands, you may kis--hey!”

Davey had beat him to it. He surged forward with so much force they both went tumbling to the ground. Race squeaked and jumped out of the way ranting about how unbelievable they were, but Jack couldn’t care. Davey’s lips were warm and his body was warm and his hand was cupping his cheek and-

“Alright you two”Blink said, “you are so lucky there aren’t any children here, stand up and have some sort of decency”

“Nah, give me a minute”Jack mumbled, and went right back to kissing Davey. His husband. Oh he could get used to saying that. He only had a few more seconds before Davey was forcefully pulled off of him and pulled over to stand by Sarah. The best part was he was smirking the whole time, he never thought shameless would look so good on Davey, but it was a color he wore well.

“Since these two have no self control”Blink sighed, “I’m going to wrap this up. I now present to you Mr.Jack Kelly-Jacobs and Mr.David Jacobs-Kelly! Now get outta here you two!”

Without a second glance, Jack had surged forward, grabbed Davey and took off running. The hazel eyed man laughed and stumbled behind him but did his best to keep up. They’d be getting an earful from Katherin and Sarah for pulling a stunt like this, but Davey was still learning and spontaneity was his favorite lesson. They kept going until they were well into the gardens and stopped when the roar of the guests could no longer be heard. Jack panted and kneeled bringing Davey down with him. 

“Hey Davey”

“Hey Jackie”Davey giggled.

“We’re fuckin married”

“I know!”Davey exclaimed, he quickly lost his balance and fell on his butt. Before he could get up he had a lap full of Jack Kelly-Jacobs.

“Hey Davey”He pressed his forehead to Davey’s and grinned.

“Yeah?”Davey whispered.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Anything, baby”

“We forgot the rings”

-

The ballroom used for the reception was beautiful. A shiny chandelier hanging from the ceiling,a sea of guest tables and a dance floor perfect for Jack to get drunk and absolutely obliterate. He couldn’t wait. But, it was his wedding and he needed to stay sober for the speeches at least. He was honestly starting to get a little tired, it had been a long day. Leaning his head on Davey’s shoulders he hoped to maybe catch ten minutes while the guests mingled. Davey pouted and brought a hand up to scratch at Jack’s scalp, just the way he liked. He was stupidly in love with this man.

“He’s asleep?”Katherine whispered as she passed by. Davey shook his head and awed internally as Jack groaned and buried his face in his shoulder.

“He just wanted to rest his eyes a bit, I'll keep him awake”He promised. She bit her lip and pointed to the guests who were now finding their seats.

“That would have have to be now”She winced, “We’re about to have the toast and then the speeches”

“I’ll get him up”He said, frowning a bit at Jack’s parted lips. He’d only been out for a few minutes, he must be exhausted. 

“You’re a gem, Davey. I need to make sure nobody is doing anything stupid!”with that she clicked away in her heels,disappearing in the crowd. This was quite the turnout for sure, the room was packed wall to wall. With Davey’s extended family,Jack’s as well along with all of his friends and Spot's gigantic family, they could fill up a stadium. All these people here to see them and Jack was two seconds from slipping into a coma.

“Jack”He whispered, rubbing his cheek. “Jackie, wake up”

“Mmm?”Jack grumbled.

“It’s time for the speeches, ya know? People telling us just how awesome we are”He teased, running that same hand down his neck. Jack squirmed and begrudgingly lifted his head.

“There you are”He said, “And my my my aren’t you beautiful?”

“Go to hell”Jack said, stretching his arms above his hand. 

“I’m already there”He sighed looking around again. Jack’s brows furrowed and he leaned in closer.

“Are you having fun here?”

Davey blinked, that’s not a question he was expecting. But it was sweet. He smiled and pressed a quick kiss to Jack’s lips.

“This is the moment of a lifetime, it’s just a lot to process”He explained. Jack nodded and mumbled a ‘same here’ before leaning back in his chair. Katherine stood at the front of a hall on a stage, with a glass in one hand and a knife in the other. She tapped the side repeatedly until everyone had muted their small talk and looked forward.

“Hello everyone!”she exclaimed, “I hope everyone is having a good time so far! Dinner will be served shortly but first we have some speeches prepared from the families of the grooms. Be prepared to laugh,cry and you’ll want to have your camera out because someone will  definitely do something embarrassing! Firstly we have Racetrack Higgins, brother to Jack and his best man!”

The guests cheered and Race stood up from his seat and walked towards the stage, Spot in tow. He shot Jack a smile and grabbed the microphone that was left for him.

“I want to start this off by thanking everyone who showed up. This packed ass room is just a testimony to how loved these two really are.”He said, Jack grinned and leaned in closer. This had to be good.

“ Now i’ll spare you most of the sob story. The way I met Jack Kelly was a little place called the refuge. I got there when I was two, and I don’t remember this but i’m told that I would scream for hours at night unless I was sharing a bed with him. I don’t know, call it fate but he was the person I decided to cling to.”he said and chuckled, rubbing his eyes.

 “I was so angry all the time that no one else wanted to be bothered with me but he...he dealt with me I guess. Soon enough I would never leave his side, I don’t have a memory there without him with me. Then Charlie came along”He shot a playful glare at Charlie, “and I was no longer the cute and small one, but it was fine because Jack always looked out for both of us. I’ll always say that Jack was my first parent and Medda was my second. It shouldn’t have been that way but..I-I...I’m sorry”he croaked.He turned his back to the guests and buried his face in the crook of Spots neck. 

Jack’s heart dropped.

“Holy shit”Jack said with a shaky sigh, sure he knew he did a lot but he didn’t think it meant this much to him. Davey squeezed his hand and gave a tight smile, tears pooling in his eyes.

“Holy shit is right”

Race took a few minutes to collect himself and turned back around, tears still streaming down his face.

“I-I can’t think right now and it’s really annoying cause I practiced this for weeks but I just wanted to say that Jack is my brother and my best friend and i’m just so happy that he has Davey, because Davey you make him so fucking happy. Kids like us aren’t expected to go anywhere in life, but he has Medda, he has us and now he has you. I wish you guys the best and please make me an uncle soon okay bye thank you” with that he quickly left the stage and leapt into Jack’s arms sending them both flying backwards.

“Ow, Racer. What the he-”

“I’m so proud of you, Jack”He said quickly, “I-I know I haven’t been the best brother or the nicest to you but I need you to know that I love you”

“Okay okay!”Jack said, clutching his hip. “I love you too, punk. We can talk more about this later, but get off of me!”

“C’mon, Tony,”Spot sighed, picking up the mess of limbs. Once Race was on his feet, he bent over and helped Jack up. “Congratulations Jack, you’ve been a pain in my ass as long as i’ve known this kid, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Davey, you keep him out of prison”

“On my honor,”Davey said.

“Yeah, you too Conlon”Jack said, “Who knows, you might be next”

“Oh, Spotty! We should get married!”he gasped. Spot groaned and shook his head.

“You play dirty Kelly,”Spot said.

“It’s the only way to play”Jack smirked, “Go take him for some fresh air, I don’t want him to get antsy”

“Aye aye”Spot said, practically dragging Race out of the room by his suspenders.

Katherine emerged back to the stage and clapped raising her glass. “That is Jack Kelly down for the sixth time today and yes we’ve been keeping score! Next to the stage we have my lovely,intelligent,incredibly charasm-”

“This ain’t about you!”Jack exclaimed. Katherin gave him the finger and continued. “You know her,you love her, my wife Sarah Jacobs, brother to the groom Davey and his best woman! Come on up here, pumpkin!”

Sarah made her way to the stage, and placed a kiss to Katherine’s cheek. “Hello!”Sarah called out to the audience.

 “Unlike the rest of these saps I'm going to try not to cry”She said, “For those who don’t know, Davey here is my twin, and honestly my built in best friend. We’ve been joined at the hip since we could walk,and I know him like the back of my hand. I couldn’t imagine a better fit for him than Jack. Davey was a shy kid, really serious too. Not many kids got along with him because he didn’t like running around or hand games or kickball, he liked sitting off to the side and reading. So he wasn’t really given a chance to show how amazing he was the first few years of school. That was until a little boy who called himself cowboy Jack basically bulldozed his walls and threw himself into Davey’s life.”

Jack laughed and threw his arm around Davey’s shoulder, “That’s true!”

Sarah laughed as well, and continued. “And let me tell you, Davey was pissed at first. He couldn’t understand why this boy wouldn’t leave him the hell alone because oh my god was Jack persistent! It was ridiculous! But little did he know that annoying little boy would become his best friend and later his husband.”

Davey smiled and pressed a hand over his heart.

“My brother is a little hard to read at times, he doesn’t like giving all his tells to just anybody. But what a lot of you don’t know is that he’s caring and kind and cried for hours when he ran over a rabbit--yes that is true. He wears his feelings right on his face, you just need to know how to read him. And Jack could read him just as well as I could which terrified him. He wasn’t used to anybody but me,our parents and eventually Les. He was terrified of getting hurt, he didn’t want to know what heartbreak felt like so he never even tried.”She said.

 “But Jack brought out a different side of him, a side no one had ever seen. He became spontaneous, and more outgoing and actually alive! It freaked us all out at first because we didn’t know why he was changing, but little did we know this was just the beginning of a new Davey. It’s just weird to have known that shy little bookworm and see him become such a social butterfly. I can see people snoring so I’ll get off now, congrats you guys. I love you Davey”

The guests cheered and Sarah made her way off the stage. Jack was looking at him like he had three heads.

“What?”

“You Jacobs ain’t got any emotions or somethin?”He exclaimed, wiping his eyes. “None of your family is cryin, that was beautiful!”

“We cry on the inside, baby”Davey soothed, pulling Jack’s chair closer to his.

“That’s...that’s not good-”

“Alright, everyone!”Katherine said, “This is the last speech we have on schedule for today, so don’t panic. Next up to the stage we have Charlie Morris, baby brother to the groom Jack and one of his groomsmen!”

With a bit of help from Medda, Charlie made his way to the stage. He shot a thankful look at Katherine who brought up a chair, it had indeed been a long day. He grabbed the microphone and plopped down in the seat.

“Thank god”He sighed, a grin when the guests laughed. “Now, I’m going to try and keep this short for Jack’s sake, he looks like he’s about dead on his feet” Jack sighed, he knew this boy was a natural comedian, but if this speech was more than five minutes he would smother him in his sleep.

“Skip the commentary!”Jack called out, then winced when Davey flicked his neck. 

“Would you let me say my speech? You’re lucky I wrote one”He said, “Now, just like Racer said, I can’t remember a time in my life without Jack being there. We fight a lot because I’ve still got that younger brother charm and he just can’t get over it--alright alright! I’ll be serious.”He chuckled after a wad of tissue was thrown at him.

 “Davey was introduced into my life from a young age, once he finally accepted his doom, he began to come over a lot. And I loved playing with Davey, he would teach me how to make paper airplanes,origami and he would read to me, that was luxury treatment in this household, okay. But he would only come over a few times a week, which I understood because he did have a family and all that jazz.”He said, gesturing in the direction of the Jacobs family. Mayer stood up from his seat and waved. 

 “But as those two got older, he was there every single day. And then I started wondering, why is Davey always here? Until I got up one night to get coco puffs and saw them kissing on the couch-”He smirked as the hall erupted in ooo’s “-and my pea sized thirteen year old brain went ohhhhh and I screamed ‘ewww they’re kissing!’”

Davey groaned and buried his face in Jack’s shoulder, he wanted to forget that day ever happened.

 “Which of course woke up the whole house, Jack did get in trouble and yes, I'm still paying him back for that to this day. This speech is not for Jack, no. I want to say thank you to Davey for taking the time to be so nice to me, unlike this man-”

“Get off the stage, Charlie!”Jack booed, putting his thumb down. Charlie blew a raspberry.

“In all seriousness, I'm really happy for you two. I’m not good with affection and stuff but Jack, you know I love you. And of course I'll thank you until the day I die for taking care of me. You’re one of the best big brothers I can ask for, i’m happy you’re getting married and please hold off on making me an uncle”

The applause were deafening, maybe it was Charlie’s humor or maybe they were excited for dinner, the world may never know. Jack was clapping the loudest, he was excited for dinner. Medda helped Charlie off the stage and gladly he went back to his seat. Jack let out of a sigh of relief, he was not ready to make that score seven, his back was killing him.

“Those were really sweet,”Davey commented. Jack rolled his eyes.

“Sweet but long, ‘m tired Davey”He whined.

“I know, sweetheart,”Davey said. “I know, but it’ll all be over soon”

“Promise me we don’t gotta get up tomorrow”He said.

“We can lay around all day,”Davey promised. “We can eat breakfast in bed and cuddle with Luna and sleep the day away”

“Oh my god, Luna”He perked up, “Where is my baby girl?”

“Our baby girl”Davey corrected, “She’s with Les upstairs”

“It got too loud for them, huh”

“Yeah, he texted me like an hour ago that he needed a break”Davey said.

“I sure as hell would like a break too”He grumbled.

“I know”Davey sighed, “are you still having fun?”

“I am”He said, “I am and I know how much work you put into today, I...i’m just reachin a limit, ya know?”

“I know”Davey nodded, “If it gets unbearable, let me know. I’ll tell Katherine to entertain everyone and we can take a break.”

Jack leaned in and pressed his forehead against Davey’s. “You’re so sweet with me”

“I’ll do anything for you,”Davey promised.

“Alright, let’s break up the romance!”Katherine said, taking a seat at their table. 

“Where do you keep comin from?”Jack groaned.

“Hell”She said easily, “Dinner is on it’s way out and I haven’t seen you eat anything but a bagel today”

“He did what?”Davey said.

“It’s not important”She said quickly, “Look, I know he’s exhausted. Just get him through dinner and i’ll cover until it’s time for the dances which aren’t until-”She pulled out her phone and scrolled, “-10pm, it’s 8 now, just make sure he eats and then get him out of here”

“You’re a saint”

“I take my maid of honor duty very serious”She said with a wink, “My phone is on all night so just shoot me a text if anything happens”

“Noted”Davey said, “Now how about you take a little break, you’ve been on your feet all day”

“I would, but I gotta keep things running smoothly”She said.

“Everyone is fine”Davey said, “Have dinner with us, bring Sarah too. It’ll be just like high school”

“Yeah with fancy gowns and fancy food”

“It’ll be like high school cause it’s us”Davey said, rolling his eyes. “now go get her”

“You promise we won’t be intruding?”she asked, “You’ve barely been alone all day”

“I got the rest of my life to be alone with him”Jack said, “today’s about friends and family”

“You have our word, Kath”Davey said, “now go”

-

After a well earned nap, Jack soon became the life of the party. He slid his way to the dance floor,drink in hand and ready to get this party started. Davey for one couldn’t believe he had married a toddler. Naps did nothing for him, he always woke up feeling disoriented and gross. But almost any of Jack’s problems could be solved by a nap, it was scary sometimes. But he was relieved that Jack felt better, they were going to be here for a while. Guests were supposed to be leaving around 11:30pm, and they had to be out of the castle by 1:00am because another wedding was happening that day and the staff needed to clean up. Then they had the drive from here to home which was four hours so they wouldn’t be home until 5am. Davey sighed, he didn’t drink for personal reasons but he’d never been so tempted to take a shot in his life.

“What’s wrong?”Katherine asked, and dear god she did seem to just pop up everywhere.

“Hmm?”he hummed.

“You’ve got that vacant look in your eyes, it’s the same one Sarah gets when she’s stressed”She said.

“Oh boy am I stressed”He sighed, “Just thinking about how long it’s gonna be until we get home”

“Well”She grinned, “This was supposed to be a surprise but you look like you could use some cheering up”

“Please”He said, clinging to her shoulder.

“We hired a clean up crew!”she said, doing jazz hands.

“Oh my god I love you”He all but melted against her.

“Yup!”she smirked, “Which means all we have to do is pack our bags and high tail it home, shouldn’t take any longer than twenty minutes”

“Thank you so much, Kath”He said, “home is still...it’s just so far”

“I’ll drive you guys home”She said, “Sarah and I already talked about this. It’s been such a long day and I know you’re both exhausted, plus Jack is drinking like a monster”

“That’s...I don’t know what to say,”he said.

“You don’t have to say anything, Davey”She said, “We’re family, you two were such a big help at our wedding that it’s the least we could do”

“I like helping,”He said earnestly. “I’d do it again”

“Noted,”She said, eyes scanning over his shoulder. “If you wanna help, go get your husband. You know how he gets when he’s drunk and-”She paused, listening to the music “-Shakira is playing”

“Oh god”Davey groaned, “I-you know where to find me!”

-

The remainder of the reception went off without a hitch. The first dances were as sweet as expected, Jack did shed a few tears as he danced with Medda but mostly kept it together. The bouquet toss went well, Race caught the first one and Spot football tackled Skittery to catch the second. The cake was cut, and the guests were out at 11:30pm on the dot. Jack and Davey had practically sprinted up the stairs and packed up their belongings in record time. The day had been magical,they couldn’t wait to look back on the pictures, but it was time to go home. A little after midnight Davey found himself saying goodbye to Sarah and squeezing into the backseat of their car with Luna fast asleep. If you asked him what had happened in the last hour he honestly couldn’t tell you, he stopped processing it around 10pm. Jack wasn’t any better but for different reasons. A drunk Jack was a handsy Jack and maybe Davey should have taken the front seat.

“Let me love you!”Jack whined as he once again grabbed at Davey’s leg.

“You’re drunk”

“You’re hot”

“Thank you, baby”

“Keep it pg back there,”Katherine said, eyeing them in the rear view mirror.

“Tell that to him!”He said, placing Luna on Jack’s lap. “Here, take the puppy”

Jack squealed with delight and focused his attention on that. Katherine stifled a laugh and focused her eyes on the road. Davey sighed.

It was going to be a long four hours.

-

“Thank you, Kath”Davey yawned, stepping out of the car. “I really appreciate it”

“It’s no problem”She replied, stepping out to stretch. “Do you mind if I crash here?”

“Not at all”He said, “there’s a key under the mat, let yourself in. I need to get Jack and Lu”

“Got it,”She said.

Davey walked around to the opposite side of the car and opened the door. 

“Be free”he said. Luna leapt out of Jack’s lap and happily trotted up the stairs. Jack was dead asleep, alcohol and exhaustion seemed to work better than any melatonin he’s ever taken. He leaned into the car and picked him up bridal style, closing the door with his hip. Katherine, ever the saint, had left the door open for them. 

Once he was inside he quickly padded into the bedroom, dumping Jack on the bed. He knew he should probably be a good host and make sure Katherine was comfortable but he couldn’t stand  being awake a minute longer. He closed the door and stripped down to his boxers. He was exactly one second away from jumping into bed before he realized that Jack was fully dressed.

Fuck.

He leaned over and shook Jack’s shoulders.

“Mm?”

“You gotta get naked”He said, then blinked. That’s not what he wanted to say but it got his point across.

“Do it for me”Jack mumbled and lifted his hips up.

Davey sighed and bent down to take off his shoes. “You’re so spoiled”

“Your fault”Jack mumbled. “You made me spoiled”

Next came the socks and pants. “Because I like spoiling you”

“Then stop complaining”

Davey snorted and pulled off his blazer. “I’m not complaining, i’m stating a fact”

“Gonna be so hungover”Jack groaned.

Davey started to unbutton his shirt. “Sounds like a you problem”

“You’re such an ass”

“Am not”Davey said, pulling his arms out. “No one told you to drink like the world was ending”

“I tol’ me to”

“Well you have terrible judgement” he pressed a kiss to Jack’s forehead, “You’re all done”

“Mmmthank you Davey”

Davey finally climbed into bed and relished in the mattress under his back. “No problem, now go to sleep”

Jack mumbled something in agreement and opened his arms, Davey tilted his head.

“ ‘m big spoon tonight, deal with it”He said and well Davey wasn’t going to argue, he was rarely ever the little spoon. He scooted back into Jack’s arms and god he was so warm. He felt a hand carding through his hair and he let out a low hum. This, this is what he had been waiting for all day. And it had been worth it. A full two years of planning,taking on extra projects,living on a tight budget and sheer hope had gotten him the day of a lifetime. And some funny twist of fate got him the man of a lifetime. He didn’t know who or what he had to thank for giving him Jack Kelly, but he found himself thanking the universe. It hadn’t been easy getting to this point, they had fought and argued and screamed and cried, but it was worth it. After all, every fairytale has to start somewhere, and it started the moment they said I do. And the end--well, that’s a long time away so let’s focus on the now. The present feels like a dream and the end is nowhere in sight, their fairytale was just beginning.

And Davey couldn’t wait to see where it took them.

[inthedayswhenlandswerefew]

Eccentricity [Chapter 2: You Can Run Around Infinite In My Head]

Series Summary: Joe Mazzello is a nice guy with a weird family. A VERY weird family. They have a secret, and you have a choice to make. 

Potentially a better love story than Twilight (we’ll let @killer-queen-xo​ decide when it’s all said and done 😉).

Chapter Title Is A Lyric From: Rome by Dermot Kennedy.

Chapter Warnings: Language, mentions of violence. 

Other Chapters (And All My Writing) Available: HERE

Tagging: @queen-turtle-boiii​ @bramblesforbreakfast​​  @killer-queen-xo​​ @maggieroseevans​​ @culturefiendtrashqueen​​ @imnotvibingveryguccimrstark​​ @escabell​​ @im-an-adult-ish​​ ​ @queenlover05​​ @someforeigntragedy​​ @imtheinvisiblequeen​​ ​ @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye​​ @deacyblues​​ ​ @tensecondvacation​​ ​ @brianssixpence​​ 

Please yell at me if I forget to tag you! 💜

Missing In Action

I wish she would stop staring at me.

Lucille sat at the Lees’ usual table and apathetically picked through a heaping salad. (Friday was salad bar day, which I appreciated considerably more than the chicken finger obsession that marred Mondays at Calawah University.) Every once in a while, Rami nudged her and Lucille would spear a cherry tomato with her fork and bite it in half with perfectly even, white teeth. But her large blue-green eyes—they reminded me of webs of seaweed tumbling in the cold, frothing La Push waves—always found their way back to me, strangely focused, inquisitive, perhaps accusatory.

Ben probably told them how much he hates me for whatever nebulous reason and now they all hate me too and I’m going to spend the next two years being death-glared by five ridiculously attractive and somewhat incestuous foster kids.

Chemistry was a three times a week class. Ben hadn’t shown on Wednesday, and I was 99% sure he would skip again today. I spotted him around campus periodically, always from a distance: dropping quarters into a vending machine, clandestinely vaping behind dorm buildings (what self-respecting pre-med student VAPES?!!), browsing YouTube videos in the library next to a tower of unopened textbooks, biology and chem and physics and calculus. He wasn’t home, he wasn’t sick; there was no attempt made to construct any sort of pretext. He was patently avoiding me.

I stabbed moodily at the serrated disks of cucumber in my salad. Jessica was blathering away about the latest season of The Bachelor and ranking the contestants’ eyebrows from best to worst. “...Like seriously, has she never heard of microblading?!”

“For real,” Angela offered, not especially invested but forever a good sport.

Lucille’s eyes settled on me again as she sipped a cup of steaming tea, staring until her forehead crinkled with the effort, staring hard, almost leering.

“What’s her problem?” I muttered.

Jessica shot a glance towards the Lee table and slurped her Sprite. The great mystery surrounding her potential Mormon-ness persisted. “Who? Lucy?”

Only Lucille’s friends called her Lucy. Jessica, a shameless aspiring socialite, presumed she was everybody’s friend unless they explicitly informed her otherwise, which of course no one ever did.

“Yeah,” I answered glumly.

“Maybe it’s your dress.”

“My dress? What’s wrong with my dress?”

Jessica wrinkled her nose and surveyed me as if I were a bug, and not a cute bug like a roly-poly bug or The Very Hungry Caterpillar or whatever. Like a really hideous bug. Like one of those spider-cricket hybrid things that hopped straight out of a hell dimension and into the dark, drippy corners of your basement. “It’s, like, very 1960s. But not in a sexy Woodstock way. In a ‘I’m about to join a hippie murder cult’ way.”

“I got it at TJ Maxx. It was on sale.”

Jessica snorted. “Probably for a reason.”

“That’s it. I’m giving all the hippies in my new murder cult your address.”

She and Angela laughed. Mike and Eric, the missing pieces of our daily lunch puzzle, were preoccupied with a campus protest to convert fried fish day (Thursdays) into tacos day. I sympathized with their efforts, but didn’t feel that my one-week tenure as a Calawah University student gave me much right to go around overhauling the dining hall schedule.

“I doubt she’s actually offended by a dress,” Angela said, nibbling on French fries that shed grains of salt like snowflakes.

Jessica sighed dreamily. “But Lucy’s just so fashionable...and that accent...” She drifted off into some daydream which began—I could only assume—with Lucy’s invitation to go shopping together and concluded with marrying Ben on some lush tropical island in the South Pacific.

Lucille was definitely fashionable, especially today: short black dress with sheer sleeves that ran to her fragile wrists, black polka dot tights, black heeled oxfords, dangling ruby earrings like beads of blood. She would have blended in perfectly at Paris Fashion Week. Rami was wearing a cardigan and khakis, per usual; Joe was in dark fitted jeans and a roomy U Chicago hoodie despite the fact that Forks was at minimum a thirty-four hour drive from the Windy City. What did Angela say his major was? Finance? No, Mathematical Economics. So he’s probably aiming at Chicago for an MBA or Econ PhD someday. Angela had told me that Joe was wicked smart. He better be if he’s entertaining fantasies of grad school at the University of Chicago.

Scarlett had come straight from Fencing Club and was wearing bright pink yoga pants and a t-shirt with the sleeves cut out, sprinkling Hot Cheetos into her open mouth, her blonde hair secured in a tight French braid. You know those girls who are so irrationally, gluttonously, unfairly beautiful that it doesn’t seem possible the genetic lottery could spit out so many winning numbers at once, and you comfort yourself with the certainty that there must be some set of circumstances that would level the playing field—I bet she looks like anyone else without all that makeup, she just has a really good sense of style and knows how to maximize her assets, there are definitely some goofy oversized ears hiding beneath that hair and that’s why she always wears it down—and then one day you run into them wearing sweatpants and a ponytail in the tampon aisle at Walmart and they’re still so perfect it stings you, baffles you, makes you feel like there must have been some divergence in the evolutionary chain because there’s no freaking way you’re the same species? Yeah, Scarlett was one of those girls. Scarlett was the queen of those girls.  

Ben was conspicuously absent from the table.

Scarlett’s pink leopard-print iPhone rang and she answered. “Hello?” She turned to Joe. “Dad says you left your phone at home. Do you need it?”

Joe was gnawing his way through his third slice of pepperoni pizza. “No, I’m good, thanks though.”

Scarlett relayed the message. “Dad says he’s going to bring it by just in case.”

“Oh my god, ScarJo, I’m fine! Tell him not to!”

“Dad says he doesn’t trust you and he’s going to be here in fifteen minutes. He’s also bringing the Game Theory homework you left by the hot tub.”

Joe groaned and rolled his lively dark eyes as Rami grinned at him; Lucille was still watching me and entirely oblivious.

“Isn’t it weird that Ben and Lucille have accents?” I asked Jessica. “That they’re from the U.K.? I didn’t think fostering kids was an international thing.”

“It’s not that weird. Dr. Lee is British too. Maybe there’s some kind of exchange system, I don’t know. But you know what I do know?”

“What?” Now my interest was piqued.

She smiled. “That the British accents are hot.”

“Ugh,” I exhaled involuntarily.

“Please get a hobby,” Angela begged Jessica. “Start a YouTube channel. Make care packages for orphans. Grow marijuana. Adopt a cat. I have a shift at the animal shelter this Sunday morning, you want to come with me?”

“Sorry, can’t. I have a temple thing.”

Temple on Sunday. The mystery is solved. She’s a Mormon for sure. I mentally resolved not to let her set me up with anyone unless I was still single on Valentine’s Day. Which, obviously, assuming I’m not dead in a ditch somewhere, I will be.

I gathered up my trash and slung my backpack over my shoulder. “Okay, well this has been a bizarre lunch to be completely honest, and now I have to go to Chemistry so I’ll see you later and hopefully we can brainstorm some more alternatives to Jessica’s current life trajectory on Monday. Because I am not looking forward to being a bridesmaid in these impending Lee nuptials.”

“Oh please!” Jessica lamented. “He doesn’t even know I exist. You, on the other hand...”

I scoffed. “Yeah, he wants to kill me. I truly have a gift.”

They waved as I left. I could feel Lucille’s eyes on me until I reached the door.

Sure enough, Ben wasn’t in Chemistry. I tried not to notice. I drew my atoms, wrote my equations, took my notes diligently and in my favorite sky blue ink. But I felt the emptiness in the chair next to me like a black hole, like an immense and dragging weight, like a snag in the fabric of all those interwoven strands of physics that orchestrate the universe like an immortal puppeteer. Why can’t I forget this guy? Why do I still feel like I’ve met him before?

Halfway through class, I hauled my emergency sweatshirt out of my backpack and pulled it on over my dress, floral and flowing and golden yellow like the sun, the sun that never shines here in Forks. I had liked it plenty under the florescent lights of the fitting room at TJ Maxx, and I had still liked it this morning; but Jessica’s words hummed around in my skull like wasps. The zipper of the sweatshirt was broken, but it accomplished the task of obscuring my dress well enough.

After Chemistry, I journeyed to the campus library to find a book I was supposed to read and present for a different class. I looked it up in the computer catalogue, spent an embarrassingly long time trying to figure out how the Dewey Decimal System works, eventually wound up finding the book on the highest floor of the library...and, to add a little extra peril to the mission, on the highest shelf. The book mocked me from its lofty, unattainable stronghold. The title was embossed in gold letters down the crimson spine. The Walruses And Me: A Transformative Experience. Idiotic title, I’m aware. It’s about some marine biologist who spent months alone in the Arctic studying the lifecycles of walruses. A noble pursuit, sure, but still a terrible title.

There wasn’t a chair or stepstool in sight. I tested my weight by stepping up onto the second-lowest shelf. The metal immediately squealed and shifted in protest. I retreated back down to the carpet, defeated by gravity. I scowled up at the book and sighed melodramatically. Ugh.

“Need something?”  

I spun around to see Joe in his University of Chicago hoodie and pale flawless skin and intangible magnetism, that bewildering trademark Lee ethereality. I instinctively crossed my arms, clutching the sleeves of my sweatshirt, shrinking inwards like a startled armadillo in the Arizona desert.

“Are you, uh, anemic...?” he ventured.

“Oh no, I’m not cold. I’m just trying to hide my dress. My friend said it was too hippie-murder-cult 1960s.”

I figured he’d laugh, make a snide comment, maybe just blink in confusion. Instead, he glimpsed down at my dress—what could still be seen of it, anyway—and shook his head. “The neckline isn’t right for the 60s. And you seem like you’ve showered at least once in the past two weeks, so definitely not a hippie.”

I smiled, completely unexpectedly. “I didn’t realize Econ majors knew anything about leftist counterculture.”

“Disparaging it is our favorite pastime. Are you trying to get a book or are you just disrespecting university property for entertainment?”

I pointed. “The big red one.”

“The Walruses And Me...?”

“I know, it’s a horrible title. Not my personal preference. It’s for a class.”

“Bestiality 101?”

“Good guess. Marine Mammals.”

“Ahhh.” He glanced up and down the aisle, tapped his chin with agile fingers, pondered something I wasn’t privy to. “Turn around for a second.”

“What? Why?”

He waved his hand mysteriously in front of his grinning face. “It’s a magic trick. I’m going to make your problem disappear.”

“You can’t climb that,” I warned. “You’ll fall and break your neck. Or you’ll knock the whole shelf over and cause a tragic domino effect and the university will withhold your diploma until you pay them restitution.”

“I’m extremely athletic.”

“Are you sure?” I appraised him with exaggerated skepticism for comedic effect. “My dad refers to you only as the spindly annoying Lee.”

Oh my god, WHY did I say that?

Now he would definitely hate me. Now I’d have two mortal enemies on one campus. I mentally calculated how humiliating it would be to transfer to some Florida college, any Florida college, after only one week at Calawah. Hi mom, yeah I’m coming to live with you and Paul, a gang of hot pasty foster kids wants to slaughter me.

Instead, Joe threw back his head and cackled wildly. A librarian—mid-fifties, angry red hair from out of a box, fuzzy cat sweater—glared into the aisle and shushed him.

“Chief Swan...he actually...he calls me that? Really?!” Joe managed, wiping his leaking eyes. “That’s hilarious. I’m so glad my life is in his hands. Okay seriously, turn around.”

“Why would you help me?” I asked suspiciously.

“That’s just what I do. I’m a friendly guy.”

“This friendliness must not run in the family.”

Again, Joe’s cheerful demeanor didn’t falter. “You mean Ben? Forget about Ben, he hates everyone. Don’t take it personally.” Then he added: “Plus, as I’m sure you know, we’re not biologically related. No overlapping genetic material whatsoever. I didn’t get the male supermodel gene, he didn’t get the irresistibly charming gene, life’s not fair but the world keeps spinning.”

“It sure does,” I agreed softly. Unexpected wisdom from my new favorite Lee. I turned away from him. “Fine, I’m not looking, go ahead and dazzle me with your supernatural friendliness—”

“Done.”

“What?” I whirled around. Joe held The Walruses And Me in his hand. “How...did you...?!”

He passed me the book as I sputtered incoherently. “I told you. Magic trick.”

“I don’t....?!” I gawked up at the top shelf, at Joe, back to the top shelf. Sure enough, the space where The Walruses And Me once lived was now just a vacant slit in the row of dusty books. How could he have climbed up there that quickly? How could I not have heard anything? “The shelves didn’t even creak,” I murmured shakily.

“Yes, well, that’s due to my conveniently spindly physique.” Joe winked. “Any other problems I can help you solve at the moment, Baby Swan?”

“No. And don’t call me Baby Swan, or I’ll push this whole bookshelf over and tell the feisty librarian lady you did it.”

“That’s cold, ma’am.”

I liked that Joe didn’t make me feel like Ben did: unworthy, unloved, infuriating. Joe made me feel something else, something lighthearted, casual, buoyant; like the world didn’t have anything in it worth worrying about, regretting, agonizing over. Like unadulteratedly myself was all I ever needed to be.

I heard a muted buzz and Joe slid his iPhone out of his jeans pocket. Dr. Lee must have successfully delivered it. “Whoops, I forgot that Ordinary Differential Equations existed. Got to go. See ya.”

“Bye,” I replied. And then Joseph Lee was gone, very quickly, a little too quickly, the same way that Ben had vanished on that first afternoon after Chemistry.

Forks is weird. Calawah University is weird. And the Lee kids are super fucking weird.

Long Walks On The Beach

“Can I ask you a random question?”

“You just paid me $100 for an oil change that took fifteen minutes. You can ask me anything you want.” He grinned, flashing bright teeth and deep dimples.

It was Saturday afternoon. I had shoveled down a Chipotle veggie bowl as Archer changed the 1999 Accord’s oil in a small garage with a cracked concrete floor and the searing pungency of gasoline fumes thick in the air. He had apprenticed all through high school and rented his own shop after graduation. Archer now had a loyal clientele that encompassed virtually the entire Quileute reservation and a growing chunk of Forks...including Charlie and me, of course. Archer was the only child of Larry Foxchild—Charlie’s best friend since they worked together at Dairy Queen as teenagers—and the closest thing to a son my dad would ever have. I guess that made him like a brother to me, something that seemed intuitive now that I’d thought of it.

After the Accord was serviced we drove it down to La Push to walk on the beach, climb the salt-lashed rocks, toss pebbles into the roiling surf, reprise our childhood enthusiasm for poking dead washed-up marine creatures with shards of driftwood.

“Do you know anything about the Lees?” I asked Archer, investigating a deceased green shore crab.

His brow furrowed. He looked so serious like that, suddenly so much like Larry: the same tan skin, jet black hair, umbral eyes like oil wells, strong jaw overlaid with the stubbled shadow of a beard. We really aren’t kids anymore, are we? “The doctor and his kids?”

“Yeah. The foster kids. They’re really pale and strange and half of them are British.”

Archer chuckled. “I know who you mean. They’re hard to miss.”

“Are they...” Just eccentric rich people? Traumatized from abusive childhoods? Government experiments? CIA agents? Secret murderers? The image of Ben in that first Chemistry class came roaring back to me, including the adjective that had flashed red behind my eyes like an emergency exit sign: fierce. Finally, I decided: “Dangerous?”

Now Archer full-on laughed, gripping his belly, shaking his head. Drops of saltwater flew from his short hair. “Seriously?!” he exclaimed. “Come on, they’re freaks but they’re not, like...that kind of freaks.”

“Are you sure?” I was starting to feel better already. Of course they’re not actual demons, you fucking idiot. This is Washington, not The Twilight Zone or Black Mirror. Not goddamn American Horror Story.

“Yeah.” Archer skipped a grey pebble over the water, something I’d never been able to do. “I’ll be honest, I don’t know them all that well. They usually keep to themselves. But I’ve never heard anything bad about any of the kids. And everyone respects Dr. Lee and appreciates him for taking the pay cut to come to some bumblefuck town like Forks. He’s insanely highly credentialed, has degrees from Harvard or Yale or somewhere like that. Super impressive. We’re lucky to have him. I definitely sleep better at night knowing he’ll be the one to fix me up if I ever get a few fingers ripped off on the job.”

“Don’t even say that. Then who would I grossly overpay for oil changes?”

Archer smiled, then sobered as he peered out over the Pacific Ocean.

“What?” I asked, feeling a plummeting in my guts like primal fear.

“Well...okay, so there is one thing that’s always bothered me. You remember Grandpa Foxchild?”

“Yeah, of course.” He had been an impossibly ancient man with long grey braided hair, a low rumbly voice, gnarled arthritic hands, ceaseless wrinkles. I remembered Charlie calling me when he passed away last spring. Renee and I had picked out a flower arrangement to send to the funeral.

“So,” Archer said slowly, like he was still puzzling it out himself. “Grandpa used to say things like ‘That Dr. Lee has been around a long time.’ Which of course makes no sense, the Lees moved here like two years ago. And I’d tell Grandpa that, but he completely ignored me. He would just keep repeating it. ‘That Dr. Lee shouldn’t still be here.’ ‘That Dr. Lee should go on home to where he came from.’ ‘That Dr. Lee isn’t right.’ Creepy shit like that. My dad and I always assumed it was the dementia talking, but...I don’t know. It just bothered me. Because Grandpa...he wasn’t just being gossipy or suspicious. He was angry. And he was afraid. Grandpa was at Guadalcanal and Iwo Jima and he would talk about that no problem, mention landmines or flesh melting off a soldier’s face like it was nothing. He was a tough guy. Immeasurably tough, I’ll never be half the man he was. But if you mentioned the Lees, Grandpa got scared. Why the hell would he be so scared of them?”

I didn’t have an answer for him, not a single word. I just stared at Archer, my eyes growing huge, my heart sprinting, blood pounding in my ears. He knew. Grandpa Foxchild knew there was something off about them, and now I know it too. I don’t know how I know, but I do.

Archer tittered nervously. “Anyway, that was genuinely disturbing. But like I said. It was probably just the dementia.”

“What if it wasn’t?”

“It had to be,” he insisted. “There’s no other logical explanation.”

“I guess,” I agreed, scooping up the green shore crab corpse with my bare hands. I hurled it out into the waves, imagined it sinking through murky water and suspended grains of sand, the body settling into prehistoric silt, the scavengers descending upon it, the inescapable wheel of birth and death and resurrection through those who unwittingly carry our atoms with them into the next generation, into the perpetual future.

That night my dreams were full of pale skin and scorching eyes, Ben and Joe and Rami, Lucille and Scarlett, crashing waves, cold water and bleached bones; and Grandpa Foxchild’s mistrustful refrain: That Dr. Lee has been around a long time.

Benjamin

I soared down the staircase and through the dining room. Gwil was working late at the hospital, Mercy outside tending the animals, everyone else presumably scattered throughout the house. I had to get out before anyone noticed me. I had to get out without Rami or Lucy knowing.

I yanked open the door to the back porch. Rami was waiting there.

“Good evening,” he greeted me in that slow, thoughtful drawl.

“Stay the fuck out of my head.”

“You know how it works, Benny Boy. I can’t ignore the loud thoughts. And you’ve been having some very loud thoughts lately.”

I stared down at my shoes, all black Adidas. Black is good. It doesn’t show stains. For example, purely hypothetically, splatters of human blood and organs. “I can make it quick. I can make it painless.”

Rami’s aura flared maroon; not enraged, no, not quite that, but certainly revolted. I was always finding new and horrifying ways to revolt them, whether I was trying to or not. “She has a family, Ben. A father. You know Chief Swan, you’ve seen him around town. He’s a good person. She’s a good person. You really want to do this? You really want to relapse like this?”

I didn’t reply. I didn’t have to. Hearing thoughts is a tricky thing, and not a gift that I would ever want; unspoken words are rarely a steam and usually a storm, disjointed and twisting, interrupting each other, bottomless layers of whispers and screams. But I was sure Rami could catch the important parts: that I didn’t know the difference between good and bad people, that I didn’t know what to think of people at all, that for me her blood was not a desire but a compulsion. I couldn’t stop envisioning it spilling over my tongue and teeth, down my throat, hot and pulsing erratically and fading. “Why can’t you hear her? Why can’t I see what she’s feeling?”

Rami shrugged, characteristically placid and restrained. It was maddening. “There are seven and a half billion people on this planet. So maybe every once in a while you get one that lives in our blind spots, there’s something chromosomal or psychological that puts them on a different frequency. I don’t know. How the hell should I know? All I know is that you definitely shouldn’t be seriously considering...well. What you’re considering.”  

“Have you ever met someone whose thoughts you couldn’t hear before?”

“No,” Rami admitted; and was that a ghost of unease that crossed his face?

“Please, Rami. Let me go. Pretend you never saw me.” My words come out strained, hushed, like a spilled secret, like a confession. I’ve never wanted anyone’s blood like I want hers.

He heard that; I could see the dismay in his eyes. Now his aura is dark grey, almost black. Disappointment. Resignation. Mourning. “I told you what Lucy saw.”

“What she saw is impossible and you know it.”

Again, Rami shrugged. That blind, mindless faith. I wished I knew what it felt like. “She’s never wrong.”

“Have you told him?”

“Who, Joe?! Of course I haven’t told Joe. He...”

“He wouldn’t believe it either?” I snapped, like it was a victory.

“No,” Rami amended carefully. “No, he would believe anything Lucy saw.” Lucy had visions: flashes of the future, the past, the present. They were rare and unpredictable, often fragmented, snapshots rather than arcs. But they were always true. Or, rather, the other Lees claimed they were. The real Lees. “I don’t know what he would do about it,” Rami said finally. “So I’m waiting it out. And killing one of the primary participants is definitely not waiting it out.”

I seethed as I glared at him, hating him in that moment, hating myself only slightly more; and he heard that too. But then that wispy, fleeting haze around him was a pink like the last threads of sunlight sinking into the Western horizon. Forgiveness. Attachment. Love.

“Come with me, Ben,” Rami said gently, opening the door. “Come back inside. You can beat this. You’re better than this. You’re a good soul. You wouldn’t be with us if you weren’t.”

I tried to laugh. It came out like a snarl. “I haven’t had a soul in a long time.”

[awhiskeyriver]

Peaches & shampoo!

Hi, I’m Amelia and welcome to what is apparently now my beauty blog, lmao.

Peaches: Do you have a skincare routine?

Yes and I’m very dedicated to it, haha. This is it in order:

Makeup Wipes

Cleanser

Cleanser II

Emulsion

Toner

Serum I

Serum II

Serum III

Tumeric Treatment (for dark spots/acne scarring)

Matcha Treatment (for under eye brightness & hydration)

Day Cream I & II

Night Cream I & II

Lip Treatment

Face masks I love:

Esfolio (you can literally find these in a 10pk at TJ Maxx for like $6.99 all the time)

Origins (this will literally get rid of zits overnight. bless @badnovels for sharing this gem with me a few years ago. its now my go-to)

Dr Jart (super fun and effective)

TONYMOLY (they have all different kinds that target specific needs)

I Dew Care

innisfree

Aztec Healing Bentonite Clay (you’ve probably seen or heard of this one and let me tell you the hype is real. My skin is incredibly soft after using it. Word of warning: it’s messy, you can’t let it go down the sink or it’ll clog and it kind of smells lol but if you can get past all that it’s worth it? Lol. I also found this at TJ Maxx for $5 and may or may not have literally squealed)

Shampoo: favorite scent?

Fresh rain

[kamiboothblog]

Reflections and Roots

Our current world situation offers plenty of material for writers like me to draw from. But - and I know I’m preaching to the choir here - I’m freakin’ exhausted. Some days, trying to make sense of the chaos is just too much. And while I find writing calms me, organizing my thoughts right now seems overwhelming. So today I’m just going to share a myriad of reflections about what I have learned, been reminded of and/or observed over these past few weeks. Here goes...

If you are lucky enough to have children who actually love each other, you will be blessed even further by the many moments you watch from afar as they bond.

When the quarantine is lifted and I can finally leave the house for a night or more, my cats are either going to have severe separation anxiety or the biggest house party this neighborhood has ever seen.

Turns out some people do not read my blogs for entertainment or insight but to gain information to try to hurt me or the ones I love. Here is my message to them: What you are doing makes you about as sick as a creepy pedophile in a white van. Guess what else it makes you? A FAN. Welcome aboard.

It appears that a lack of free time was not the reason I haven’t cleaned and organized my bedroom closet.

We, The Excessively Compassionate, must always, always be mindful to set firm boundaries. Otherwise, in an effort to avoid disappointing or hurting others, we disappoint and hurt ourselves. Consider boundaries a form of kindness to ourselves. Our boundaries tell people how we expect to be treated. 

This pandemic has allowed me to get back to my roots - not the family history kind, the hair kind. All I can say is WHOA.

When we are really, really sad, we girls tend to curl up in little human balls and cry our eyes out on our bathroom floor. Why we choose the floor as our Place of Despair cannot be explained. Those who misunderstand us may call it overly dramatic. Spiritually, however, perhaps it is because this brings us closer to our original mother - Mother Earth. (You’re welcome. Let us all meditate and burn sage now.) All I know is that I’m glad I have a soft, fluffy rug outside of my shower - and I sure wish I had put in those fancy heated tile floors during my house remodeling.

Brothers (and sisters) from other mothers are very important. 

“Man up” is a tricky term. I like the idea of being strong. I don’t like the inference that men cannot show weakness. Maybe if society allowed men to show their emotions more they wouldn’t suffer so much silently, increasing their pain. Perhaps the better term is “Step up.”

Hot dogs cannot be eaten using hamburger buns. It. Just. Doesn’t. Work.

Children’s laughter is medicinal.

Sometimes love is letting people do what they have to do to get better, even if it rips your heart out to be away from them.

Sometimes love is also knowing what rips someone’s heart out, and not doing that. 

Black beans cannot be substituted for white beans. (This is not a racial opinion but a cooking fact.) 

I saw my first dandelion of the season today. It was growing out of some debris. I wonder if it knows it is beautiful and seeing it makes me smile. Or, does it believe that it can’t compare to other flowers, that it is just not good enough for me to gaze upon. I wish it could talk to me. I’d remind it that, with time, its white puffballs can be blown upon, helping make wishes come true. That’s pretty darn special. 

Our children are watching us now more than ever. Let’s make sure we are their constant and their strength, while revealing our humanness.

Contrary to my own previous belief and that of my family members, it appears I do not have an obsession with toilet paper…or I have been cured of it. Proof: While the hoarders were out snatching up huge packages of Charmin and the like, I have been sitting calmly at home, not purchasing even ONE SINGLE ROLL since this whole wacky self-isolation thing began. It used to be if there were “only” 10 rolls left I nervously ran out to the store to get more. Nope. I’m a solid and steady TP management queen now. (Side note: It helps that I bought a 40+ roll pack during a regular shopping trip in late February.)  

Teenage boys eat a lot. I mean, A LOTTA LOTTA LOT.

Depression is real and anxiety is a....b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b...witch. 

This health crisis is teaching our youngest generation how to be compassionate and make sacrifices for others. As adults, this will serve them and the world in wonderful ways. Our future looks bright.

Just as I suspected, the Hallmark Channel is a gift from God.

Get up. Get up. Get up. Keep going. Keep going. Keep going.

As a self-employed person who works from home, I have come to the horrifying realization that my weekday life in quarantine is not all that different than my weekday life before quarantine. Except I don’t get to go to TJ Maxx, which makes me very sad.

I should have hugged my parents longer last time I saw them.

Cat hair, like the coronavirus, seems impossible to contain.

When all of this is over, I’m going to the ocean. I’m going to soak the sun into my weary bones, wiggle my bare toes in the warm sand, breathe the salty air in deeply, listen closely to the roar of the waves and thank God for everything. Until then, I’ll just continue to thank God for everything...including dandelions. 

[spiderman-homecomeme]

Something Blue (and Red)

Part 4 of “And A Silver Sixpence in Her Shoe.”

AN: Well, it’s been a while, but here is the final part of the wedding fic! Thank you guys from the bottom of my HEART for all of your patience!! It has been a crazy semester for me, but I am finally free!! Look out for more promptmas stuff coming, secret santa, and a few more WIPS in the near future!

Enjoy!

-

In his twenty-four years of being alive, Peter’s not sure that something’s ever been so right-- ever felt so right. Rarely have the stars aligned in such a way, so perfectly as they had in that specific moment as he stood, waiting in the winding check-out line of his local TJ Maxx, his arms already full of items he didn’t necessarily need.

But when he saw them, he knew.  

There was nothing else to do, no choice left to make.

No question in his mind as the bored teen mindlessly scans the treasures, as he swipes his debit card, as he answers the age old question on the pinpad, “amount okay?”

MJ, however, seems less than impressed with the purchase, holding the limited edition Spider-Man socks between her fingers as if they might bite her, her nose crinkling in disgust.

“Seriously?” She asks, fixing him with a quizzical brow.

“Seriously,” He beams, obviously more excited than she was. “I had to.”

“Uh-huh,” she speaks slowly, carefully examining the blue and red socks. “And you don’t think that it might have been a little reckless for you, Peter Parker, to buy Spider-Man socks?”

Peter gives an innocent shrug, mouth twitching into a nonchalant frown. “Nah. The cashier just thought I was a big fan. We had a nice chat about Spidey. No biggie.”

Her face remains expressionless as she stares blankly at him, save for the skeptical quirk of her brow.

Peter decides to simply ignore the doubt radiating from his fiancée, his lips pulling back into a mischievous grin. “That’s not all…”

She barely has any time to ask before he hikes his leg up, propping his foot on the couch, revealing the exact same pair of socks.

“Now we can really be the most powerful couple out there.”

MJ can only shake her head in response, forcing an exasperated breath through her nose as the faint beginning of a smile tugs at the corner of her lips. If she were being completely honest, she wasn’t in love with the idea of becoming one of those couples; she loved Peter, more than anything, but…

Enough to wear matching socks?

Peter doesn’t mind her immediate dislike of the garments. In fact, he almost welcomes it. One extra pair for him; just means that he doesn’t have to do laundry as much, right?

(MJ tells him that that’s not what that means.)

And perhaps he wears them a bit too much, especially for someone who’s quite literally donning socks with his own (masked) face on them. It had started as a weekend only, nights-in at home thing, though it wasn’t long before he was wearing them to work, to date night, family dinners, everywhere. She’s never surprised when she sees the masked cartoon peek from under the hem of his jeans.

He claims that they’re comfy, that they’re warm, that all his other socks were dirty, etc., etc.

And really, Michelle doesn’t mind or care all that much. Whatever Peter wants to wear isn’t any of her damn business. It’s funny, it’s cute, it’s just her loveable, dumb fiancé.

But it does make their more, ahem, intimate moments a bit more difficult.

If only because seeing those damn things in all their bright blue and red glory on his feet, after he’s whispered the things he’s whispered into her ear, after he’s been trying to be so sultry and serious.

MJ can’t help but tease.

“Those staying, too?” Her voice is steady, just barely hiding the humor in her tone as she gestures at his feet.

He pauses momentarily, his shirt now crumpled in his own hand, confused for a moment before following her gaze.

And then, she laughs at her own question, hiding her face behind her hands as he playfully throws his shirt at her; he nearly trips as he steps out of his boxers, making a point to show that, yes, MJ, the Spider-Man socks stay on during sex.

It’s no surprise when she sees the very same socks as she steps out of the shower, set out next to his black and white tux the morning of their wedding.

She wouldn’t expect anything less.

A small smile tugs at her lips at the recent memory, just hours before, as she stares at herself in the floor-length mirror, her mother and May both working diligently (yet gently) at the buttons on the back of her dress, Betty standing in front of her.

That same warmth she always feels around Peter has been in full force today, and she even finds the old, yet welcome fluttering of butterflies in her stomach when the dress is finally on . Throughout her life, she’s never quite understood what it meant to “feel like a bride.” It was just a white dress; how could it have so much power? Even when shopping, when buying the dress, she didn’t get that exact feeling. Sure, it made everything much more real, but it wasn’t this .

Yet now, in spite of all of her past notions, she finally gets it; the delicate lace on the bodice and the long, elegant sleeves, the deep-v neckline, that final addition of something blue, and with that same shattered Black Dahlia necklace Peter had given her all those years ago.

Damn it, she feels like a bride.

Her mother subtly wipes at her eyes as she moves to stand in front of her daughter, clasping her hands to her chest with an almost dreamy sigh. “God, you look beautiful, Michelle.”

May nods, smiling warmly, her own eyes sparkling. “Agreed.”

“So pretty!” Betty adds, her giddiness shining through.

MJ huffs out a light chuckle, mumbling out a quiet, “Thank you,” as her hands smooth over the soft satin of her skirt. Her mind immediately goes to Peter, what he’s doing right now, how nervous he must be, and what he’ll think when he sees her, when she walks down the aisle; and just like that, her stomach does a few more giddy backflips, and she bites her lip to keep the excitement in.

“And now,” May starts, breaking the silence, a knowing grin on her face as she moves to open the final box. “For the finishing touch.”

MJ was so incredibly wrong.

Now .

Now, as the veil is placed on her head, she honestly, truly , feels like a bride.

“There,” May says, gently adjusting the fabric a fraction of an inch so that the veil lays prettily against Michelle’s curls.

Again, Michelle’s mother sighs, though along with the misty eyes comes a twitch of a frown fighting back the tears.

MJ playfully rolls her eyes. “I’m not even married yet, Mom, come on,” she gently teases as she pulls her mother into a hug.

“I know, I know,” the older woman says with a soft, sheepish laugh. She pulls back, looking at the two Jones women staring back at them in the mirror. “Give me a break, okay? I’m just so happy for my little girl,” she adds, squeezing her daughter’s side.

Michelle utters another, “thanks,” looking down to hide her widening grin.

“I don’t blame you,” May says with a shake of her head and a kind smile. She looks to Michelle, expression warm and excited. “You ready, Em?”

The bride looks up again at her reflection, taking everything in again.

It was happening.

Today was the day.

And MJ had never been more ready.

--

Peter could have sworn he was dreaming.

This whole relationship even.

In what universe was he lucky enough to land someone like Michelle Jones, to get her to marry him, to marry his dumb ass and all the trouble and shit he gets himself into? What did he do to deserve such a partner-in-vigilante-justice?

He looks to Ned at his left, his best friend giving him an encouraging grin and a subtle (yet actually not all that subtle) thumbs up; then to his aunt, to his mentor, to his friends in the seats in front of him.

But when his eyes finally land on her, his very soon-to-be wife, he finds that he can’t look anywhere else.

Not that he’d ever want to.

He always thinks that she’s perfect, no matter what; she could literally wear a brown paper bag and he’d still marry her. But, cheesy as it sounds, the air feels like it’s quite literally been taken right from his lungs.

Even now, after six whole, wonderful, perfect years together, without fail, MJ still manages to make him forget how to breathe, the sight of her in that simple white dress, holding the bouquet of white roses and black dahlias, making his chest tighten at just how pretty she is. He knows that there’s probably tears in his eyes, but he honestly can’t tell, nor does he care when he sees the faint smirk painting her lips from under the sheer veil.

Again, he really is the luckiest loser in the world.

A lucky loser who happens to be wearing blue and red Spider-Man socks.

What can he say? It’s the nice boost of confidence. Ned has his hats, Peter has his Spidey socks.

He’s unable to hold back or fight his smile--though it’s not like he’s really trying all that hard--as she finally reaches him. She glances down, and he can see the toothy grin from behind her veil, the soft expression causing his heart to swell. He helps her pull the veil back, finally able to see her after a whole day apart.

The officiant welcomes everyone, beginning the ceremony with a short speech of thanks that both Peter and MJ had written before hand.

However, Peter finds that he can’t hear what the man is saying over how beautiful his fiancée is.

He almost doesn’t hear him ask to start the vows.

Peter snaps out of his trance, pulling a folded piece of paper from his jacket. “Oh, yeah! Sorry. Uh, yeah. Vows.” A faint pink blush settles over his features as he stammers. A quiet murmur of good-natured chuckles briefly fills the room, MJ joining in, of course.

“MJ,” He starts. He feels the lump in his throat, the emotion fluttering in his stomach. He coughs, looking between the paper and the love of his life. “You are my favorite person. My best friend in the entire world. Sorry Ned.”

That gets another laugh, both from MJ and the room, and Peter passes a teasing, fake-sheepish smile to his best man.

Ned waves it off with a laugh, shaking his head.

Peter continues. “I feel so overwhelmingly lucky and proud to stand here with you today. Honestly, I feel like I hit the jackpot. When I’m with you, MJ, I’m the best version of myself. Because… with you, I’m always utterly and unapologetically myself. You accept me for who I am, even if I can be a bit of a dumbass sometimes. There’s not much for me to say that I haven’t already said, you know me, and there’s not much to give that’s not already freely given. But… I’ll give it a shot.”

He takes another deep breath, glancing up to see the warmth and love in MJ’s expression, his chest tightening. “I promise to always try and make you laugh and smile, no matter what, even if my jokes aren’t really that funny, because let’s be honest, those are my best ones.”

MJ shakes her head, not even trying to fight back her smile.

“I promise to be a better roommate, and to actually put dishes in the dishwasher instead of in the sink or on the counter by the sink. I promise to send every conspiracy theory I find, even the ones you’ve already heard. I promise to listen to your advice, and even occasionally, I promise to take that advice. I promise to love you more and more. After every win. After every fight. After every laugh.” He pauses for a moment, clearing his throat once more, combatting the shakiness. He looks back up at her, no longer reading from the folded piece of paper. “And finally, I promise to always strive to be worthy of the love you give me so freely and openly, and to never, ever take that love for granted, and to always give it back.”

He wants to make some dumb joke about how she’s a thief, taking his breath away, but he doesn’t.

“I really like you, MJ.”

Her face crumples slightly at the callback, though she holds herself together, if only so she can get through actually reading her end of the vows, as Betty hands her her own paper.

A beat of silence passes as MJ gathers both her thoughts and emotions.

“Peter,” she starts, a slight shake already to her voice. Be it from nerves or overwhelming emotions, she’s not sure. “You’re my best friend. My partner. My supporter. You’ve loved me through easy times and hard times, and I am so incredibly grateful for you and the support you have always given me. Now… Promises have always scared me. Maybe I’ve been too cautious in making them, too afraid that a change in circumstance or myself will rip the world out from under me. But… over the years, I’ve found that they can remind me of solid ground when things get shaky. Here are some promises that I can happily give to you.”

She looks up at him for the briefest of moments, heart warming. “I promise to put you first, and love you, even when you’re purposefully trying to annoy me.”

A warm laugh.

Her grin turns more playful as she looks back down at the paper. “I promise to always admit when I’m wrong--which we both know, I never am, but that’s beside the point--and to forgive you when you are. I promise to try to laugh, a real, honest laugh, at your jokes, even if they aren’t funny.”

MJ hears him scoff, her lips twisting into an even bigger smile at the sound. She continues. “I can’t promise to never make fun of you, but… I can promise to always kiss you after, just to say sorry,” she vows, shooting him another glance. “I promise to be there, no matter what, to help you when you need me. And I promise to keep updating these as we go. Because one set of vows can’t cover a lifetime of getting to grow and change alongside you. Of falling more and more in love with you everyday, which is what I promise to do for the rest of my life.”

She hands the paper back to Betty before taking his hand in hers. She’s pretty sure that’s not entirely in the whole wedding protocol, but she doesn’t care right now.

“I really like you, too.”

And then it all happens too quickly, neither of them seeing or hearing anything else as they exchange the rings.

There are no more words spoken between them, apart from “I do.” No more thoughts.

… besides finally as they hear the fateful, “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

And so, Peter does.

He’s not sure what song is playing now as he holds his new wife on the dance floor; he’s certain it’s not a song that you really slow dance to either, but he doesn’t care. After the very first one, he’s sort of lost track, too lost in his arm around her waist, hand on her back, the other holding hers.

He attempts to twirl her, though she has to awkwardly duck down under his arm, the mishap causing them to both erupt in giggles.

“I told you we needed ballroom dance lessons,” Peter tsks, pulling her close again.

“You’re right,” she remarks dryly, though he can feel her breathe out an amused smile against him. “Here, I’ll twirl you.”

He obliges, laughing when he’s able to pass under her arm much more easily. Mid-spin, his eyes land on her necklace once again, and he can’t help the way his heartstrings swell like the first violin section in an orchestra.

“Black Dahlia,” he points out, much like he did on the bridge all the years ago.

MJ nods, chuckling. “Something old.”

He hums in acknowledgement, giving her an affectionate squeeze. “I’m glad you still like it.” He pulls back slightly. “And the something new? Will I get to see that on tonight?”

Her head tilts and she takes a small corner of her lip between her teeth. “Maybe.”

“Can’t wait.”

Soon, the last cadence of the song fades out, and the familiar base-line of My Girl by the Temptations comes on.

They sway together a little longer, before Peter continues. “Something borrowed?” He asks, realizing she’d never told him.

“May’s veil,” she answers simply with a grin. Though it’s been put away again for the reception, MJ gestures to where it would have sat on her head.

Peter’s head jerks back a fraction. It had looked familiar. “Oh, God, how did I not know that?”

“I won’t tell May, I promise,” she teases. “She’ll never know you didn’t know what her own veil looked like.”

“Okay, okay, come on.” He shakes his head in good-humor, growing quiet for a moment. It’s when he doesn’t speak for even longer that MJ grows concerned.

“Pete?”

“Yeah?”

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” he answers truthfully, but she can hear the emotion in his tone. Another beat passes between them before he elaborates any further. “I’m just really happy that you got to… that you got to use that, you know?”

Somehow, she pulls him even closer, into a comforting squeeze. “I know.”

Silence falls over them again as they sway back and forth, not really dancing anymore, though still held in a close, loving embrace.

Suddenly, MJ pulls back slightly, to Peter’s utter confusion, taking his hand in hers and pulling him away from the dance floor and into one of the hallways.

“Where are we going?” He asks through a curious laugh. “What’s--”

“I need to show you something,” she says over her shoulder, before tightening her grip on his hand.

Without any question or hesitation, he happily follows her, the anticipation of what exactly she could be wanting to show him so badly that they needed to sneak away from prying eyes almost too much. They weave through friends and family, dodging questions with relative success as they reach the ends of the reception crowd.

Finally, they reach one of the welcome areas, MJ sits on one of the chaises, practically yanking her new husband down to sit with her.

She reaches down, pulling up the skirt of her dress to show a comfy pair of her black converse--a sight Peter’s not all that surprised to see, yet he still has to chuckle. Mostly in confusion still. “MJ, what--?”

She takes one of her shoes off, showing her very own pair of limited edition, Spider-Man socks.

Now that comes as a surprise. He huffs out another laugh, his brow crinkling as he looks between her sock-clad foot and her mischievous eyes. “Again… MJ, what?”

She leans in to kiss that bewildered expression off his face, only being the slightest bit successful. Her hand remains in his, her smile growing, eyes gleaming with pride and delight as she answers with a nonchalant shrug.

“Something blue.”

[pbandjesse]

Today was a really nice Christmas eve. Happy Christmas eve! I had a really nice day. Were in the car on our way up to New York. For more celebrations.

I slept pretty good last night. It took me a while to fall asleep. The little puppy Sofie decided she must sleep on me. And wouldn't stop crying until I picked her up. We slept like that for a while but I woke up and put her on the floor and she wasn't happy with me. But it was fine. And I slept alright.

James got me up at 9 like I asked. I got dressed and hated my hair. So pony tail it is. It was a nice day. Beautiful outside.

Me and James left to go to feeneys. Which is a rich person outdoor home decor place. It was all decorated for Christmas and I enjoyed looking around a lot. It was a good time. And they had a pretty excellent Santa. A good time.

We left there and decided to go to five guys. But they wouldn't open for a half hour. So we went to look around tj maxx and acme. We got soda for tomorrow and some Italian Christmas cookies. And then we got brunch.

I enjoyed the food and spending time with James. We had many laughs today. Just a really lovely day.

Once we finished eating we went back to my parents. Drove around and I pointed out things. It was nice.

When we got back dad showed me some stuff he found. Like my rain boots! And me and James brought all our gifts in to the house.

We hung out in the living room and dad went to lay down. And then mom and my brother Steve were there. And mom went to lay down.

So me and Steve and James went down to the basement to talk and try to print something. I told him all about the jury I served on. And he told me about his life drama. It was really nice to see him. He looked good. And is so happy to be able to be with at least one of his kids again. Hopefully the rest soon.

At 230 Felicia and their daughter got there. It was nice to see them. I have seen the little girl since she was a baby baby. She's so big now! She gave me the gift Felicia picked up for me. She told me I wasn't allowed to open. Then that I had to open. It was a puzzle box. Really pretty. She said I had to open it. And I did. And she loudly announced "it's empty!" with a big smile. Hilarious.

At 3 once we got dad up we headed to dinner. We went to bone fish grill and we had a blast honestly. The food was good. The conversation was good. And very silly. It was a really good dinner.

We left there and tried to go to a natively with animals but they didn't open for like 45 minutes. So instead we went home.

Once we got there I ran to put the Christmas pjs on the dogs. Which was so cute. And then we opened gifts!

James got me a large pusheen. I'm very excited about it. Mom got me a thumb piano and a drill and some tights and a robe and a plush of gritty! We love gritty! James got a scale for the kitchen and some. Fancy olive oil and a bread dip kit. My brother gave us a really sweet card. And $20. Which is was embarrassed about for no reason. I love him and I'm going to use my Christmas money to buy a nice new suitcase. Because my dad is sending me and mom on a trip. I'm excited.

Steve and family left. And we spent some time talking to my parents. But soon it was time to go.

Hugs all around. The car was already packed. And me and James decided to stop at one of the live nativiy.

I pet the goats and the sheep and was very happy. And then we were on the road for real.

We had some confusion about the turn pike. We were apparently talking about different ones. But were all good. It's a nice trip. But I am tired.

I hope your night is great. And if you celebrate Christmas or Hannukah or Yule or whatever. I hope it's a great one.

Goodnight everyone!

[not26anymore]

Addicted to TJ Maxx and Marshall’s Makeup! tj maxx and marshall's sell prestige and high-end makeup for low prices I found a Marc Jacobs eye-conic eyeshadow palette and that is what started my obsession with finding deals at TJ Maxx and Marshall's.

[southernchicstyle]

Fun in the Sun & Flamingos!

Can you believe that the Baha Mar area of the Bahamas has real, live flamingos?!? I was more than excited to learn this fact. And, of course, I had to take a photo with the beauties.

And, my clothing had to include some pink.

Our day in Baha Mar included sleeping in, visiting the flamingos, food and drinks from the food trucks, and lots of time at the pool!

This pom pom coverup doubles as a cute dress and coordinated perfectly with my More Color Please + Colores Collective pink pom pom earrings. 

Everything around Baha Mar is picture perfect including the towel huts and bathrooms (the striped buildings you see in the photos. 

We stayed at the SLS Baha Mar, but the amenities for the Hyatt and SLS are all connected. I really wasn’t sure where one ended and the other began. And we certainly had a lot to keep us occupied.

We hopped around from pool to pool and enjoyed the food truck bites for breakfast and lunch. One of my bff’s 40th birthday celebration brought us there and it was a great spot for it.

Linked everything (coverup/dress, hat, etc) below.

Resort: SLS Baha Mar (not sponsored, we just loved the SLS)

- White Multi Pom Pom Dress $102

- Pom Pom Earrings (by Carrie C and Colores Collective)

- Customized Floppy Hat $50

- Army Green Bikini (found the bottoms online here, was a local TJ Maxx find)

- Round Tote (sold out but here’s another)

- Moroccan Bag Tassel by Colores Collective $15

[noccalula-writes]

Dry Skin Product Round-Up

At the suggestion/request of no one - I just love talking about this shit. 

In case some of my friends/followers on Tumblr get as super-dry in the face as I do in the winter, a quick PSA re: the best products I’ve found - 

When we made the move from Florida to Ohio, it meant experiencing my first /real/ winter. I grew up in southern Alabama, which def gets cold as fuck and has hard freezes but nothing prepared me for the reality of the heat constantly running high in my house, my car, every store I set foot in and my skin reacted accordingly. I have perfectly normally balanced but sensitive skin in the humid climates of my home but the second it drops below 60 here, my face becomes a leather boot and my hands turn into deadly weapons as the callouses on my fingers begin to break apart and snag on literally every fucking thing I touch. 

So, for my other sensitive dry-babies, I posit unto thee some recommendations (and a disclaimer that I don’t fuck with drugstore brands much given how shady their ingredients tend to be) from the list of things that helped save me from my scaly lizard future during my first transplanted winter and well into my second now. Keep in mind, there’s quite a bit of Lush here because I worked there - they’re out of my budget had I not had an employee discount for the holidays but the products are still really, really good and worth the money if you have it: 

Lush’s Full of Grace serum is a delightful weirdo. It’s a solid bar that you rub between your fingers until the oils melt and you then apply them to your face (or you can put the bar directly on your face, whatever works). It’s loaded with portabello mushrooms and murumuru butter meaning it’s a heavy hitter with the antioxidants too - I have very sensitive skin and have to be mindful of weird shit but this one is so luxuriously moisturizing and smooth that I have replaced my night time moisturizer with this serum alone more than once. It’s 16.95 online or in stores so it’s a little pricier than drugstore but far less than designer brand, and like with all Lush products you can rest assured that it’s cruelty free and ethically sourced. For a toner, Lush’s Eau Roma spray toner is the most moisturizing, but I love Breath of Fresh Air so much that I’m reticent to change it. It’s the ultimate lazy skincare step - wash your face/get out of the shower, spray it on, rub on your moisturizer while it’s still damp and bam, done. The small sizes are like 10.95ish each and the big boys are something like 23ish but I have def made a full size of BoFA last a full calendar year before so it’s well worth it. 

During my No Buy Nine Months that started right after my birthday (Jan. 2nd), I’m going to work on phasing out brands I don’t intend to patron anymore, and one of them, sadly, is Clinique. They aren’t cruelty free and while their entire Moisture Surge line saved my goddamn life during my first winter here, I can’t justify the continued purchase. That said, the 72-Hour Replenishing Hydrator and Overnight Mask are easily duped with the drugstore brand Simple Water Boost Hydrating Booster and Sleep Mask - are they as good? No. Are they way cheaper and still pretty damn good? Yes. And, they don’t test on animals but they do use beeswax if that’s a non-starter for you. I’m forever looking for new moisturizers - especially night time ones - so I’ll report back eventually. When I had bad sensitivity spots I used one of my miracle go-to discoveries - Egyptian Magic, which I think is made in Belgium and has a really creepy racist ‘dIsCoVeR tHe SeCrEtS oF tHe AnCiEnTs’ sort of bent but is really just a shitload of royal jelly and food-grade oils that straight up killed the eczema on my eyelids and quelled any allergic reactions I had. 

A product I am super guilty of overbuying thanks to my tendency towards too many TJ Maxx trips in the summer to leech their air conditioning is moisturizer sprays. I had to put the moratorium on any more of them because there are currently like eight different ones from eight different brands in my home. I have a TonyMoly (another brand I’m gonna have to swear off of no matter how much I love it for animal testing reasons), two different ones by Nooni, Clinique and idk some other white one I can’t find. For ultra-dry skin though, I find that the Dirtyworks’ Play It Cool hydrating facial mist is the best - I am an obsessive lover of their Pure Beauty Facial Oil as my nighttime moisturizer in the summer, it is sincerely the best facial oil I’ve ever tried as it’s non-greasy and soft and nonirritating with its pleasant, gentle sweet almond oil scent. 

To slough off the ever-encroaching wall of dead skin threatening to suffocate my glow out of existence, I lean hard on Clinique’s 7 Day Scrub, which means I gotta find a better one when this one runs out.  Lush’s Angels On Bare Skin, which is their bestselling facial cleanser for a reason. It’s got lavender buds in it, which can be a bit much on sensitive skin (I can’t use it more than a few times a week as the lavender irritates my eyelids) but the ground almonds provide such a nice touch of exfoliation that’s not as harsh as some of the more salt-based scrubs. Their Ocean Salt face and body scrub is the real fuckin’ deal - harsh grain sea salt, lime oil, vodka extract - so you need to be sure your face can handle three different levels of exfoliation before you apply it. I have to be careful with it but I do use it on my face periodically and largely my calloused-ass hands. The Mask of Magnaminty is another excellent choice - I put it on before a shower and then rub it off with water so I get some extra exfoliation from the ground aduki beans in it. 

As for what that mouth do, the Nooni Water Blending Lip Oil is loaded with sea buckthorn oil and apple water and it is a goddamn delight. I am literally ALWAYS looking for moisturizing lip products because they’re the first things to scale up when the moisture gets zapped out of my house via the furnace; I burn through a lot of Hempz balms - namely Triple Moisture - and this year I completely used up one of the Ulta Juice-Infused Lip Oils in Cranberry & Pomegranate and I love it so much that if it’s still on the shelves when I finish my No Buy period, I’ll probably snag another. 

For various and sundry splashes of moisture places other than my face: almost entirely Lush products because I was using that discount, goddammit. Sleepy Lotion is a fave at night thanks to that beautiful Sleepy/Twilight product smell of blended lavender and tonka bean, sweeter than the almost medicinal bite of lavender on its own. I spray the body spray on my sheets at night too. Their holiday line of in-shower body conditioners - Buck’s Fizz and Christingle in particular - are go-tos so I don’t have to waste time being frozen while I rub lotion on frantically as I cry for my robe. I used the shit out of Hempz’s Triple Moisture Whipped Body Lotion last year in my desperate bid for skin-survival and it did not steer me wrong - plus it lasted all the way into spring. Lush’s Handy Gurugu Hand Cream, Lemony Flutter Cuticle Butter, and Lollia’s 1000 Flowers Hand Lotion have been my front line aresenal as I fight to keep these gnarly ass, calloused hands of mine under control. I may have gotten to play with lotions and creams all day at Lush but I also spent a lot of time with my hands in super hot water, usually doing bath bomb demos, so I had to take extra care to keep the moisture on. Also, I finally sucked it the fuck up and dropped the cash on a humidifier for the bedroom but I keep forgetting to fill it because chronic illness and executive dysfunction. 

If you’ve got any tips I don’t know about I would de-goddamn-lighted to hear them. 

[kylorenpunk]

Payback is a bitch. Do them all.

“itAy thanks for curing my evening boredom

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

     I think it was my friend Elli during a service project or my friend when we went to the movies (we occasionally pretend we’re a couple when we go to the movies lmao) 

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

    Shy. It was super hard to make friends during grade school. But if you put me with the right people I can be outgoing. 3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

     My friend group tomorrow. I think we’re playing smash again? 4. Are you easy to get along with?

     I think so? I have no idea tbh. I know I was a bitch when I was younger though. Hopefully I don’t put off those vibes now 5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

     The only time we interacted I was drunk so no lol. 6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

     Tattooed, nerdy vibes, can make me laugh, nice eyes, idk I just like guys ok7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

     HA. Nope. 8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

     Romantically? or friendship? Also bold of you to assume whoever does these are straight. To answer, my friends who are all homies. 9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

     Depends on the subject. I am always down to make sex jokes but don’t fucking tell me the shit you did with your SO the other night.10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

      I’m always down for deep convos tbh so I do this frequently. I think the last full length deep convo I had was with Jessica though? 11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

      “LMAO” to Joey bc I rick rolled his ass. Bitch apparently I’m always texting you?   12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

       According to spotify it’s: Alexander HamiltonGoodbye Yellow Brick Road (Sara Bareilles’ cover) When I Was Your Man (Aaron Tveit’s cover) The Greatest Show The number one song is one I don’t listen to any more so I’ll replace that with the song I’m listening to “How Far I’ll Go” 

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

      God yes. That’s the BEST feeling. 14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

      Not really miracles. But I do believe in luck in a sense 15. What good thing happened this summer?

      My birthday. Going to Chicago. 16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

      Sure I’ll kiss my mirror again. Sorry y’all I don’t kiss and tell.17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

      Absolutely.18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

      I have had so many I don’t remember my first crush. And I know for a fact I didn’t start talking to crushes till the middle of high school19. Do you like bubble baths?

      No I hate baths. I think it’s gross. 20. Do you like your neighbors?

      I like their dogs. Especially the beautiful pit I get to dog sit 21. What are you bad habits?

      I get very nervous very easily. I’m unsure of myself. I’m also messy.22. Where would you like to travel?

      New York and Europe 23. Do you have trust issues?

      Who doesn’t? 24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

      When I go to sleep.25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

      My stomach. 26. What do you do when you wake up?

      Check my phone. It’s really bad. 27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

      Neither. I like my skin color even though I’m pale as fuck. 28. Who are you most comfortable around?

      I’ll have to say my friends Yara and Josephine. Love all my other friends and no offense to y’all I’m just really self conscious 29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

      LMAO one basically did the other day. At least he regrets how he treated me. That’s some tea. 30. Do you ever want to get married?

      Hell yeah. Am I currently ready for it? Hell naw. 31. If your hair long enough for a pony tail?

     She’s too long. I really want to cut her but that costs money. 32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

      Chris Hemsworth and Anne Hathaway. Or Vanessa Hudgens33. Spell your name with your chin.

      done. That was strange? 34. Do you play sports? What sports?

      I did soccer for one season when I was 6. I spent most of the time playing with my hair. That was the end of my athletic career. 35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

      TV bc we have netflix and hulu 36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

      Tons of times. It’s my brand. 37. What do you say during awkward silences?

      I’ve been doing shitty mouth pops recently. I also start rambling about my day.38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

      Someone that puts up with my bullshit 39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

      TJ Maxx. Ulta. Target. I don’t shop often. 40. What do you want to do after high school?

      I’m outta that shit hole. Have been for 5 yrs. 41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

      Of course. 42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

      I’m listening fully and don’t really have anything to contribute yet. 43. Do you smile at strangers?

      Working at a hotel has forced me to. I hate it. 44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

      SPACE MOTHERFUCKERS - the ocean freaks me out45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

      Needing to pee, hunger or work 46. What are you paranoid about?

      EVERYTHING. Mainly the future tho 47. Have you ever been high?

      Nah. Not opposed to it though. 48. Have you ever been drunk?

      Yep. I get really touchy. It’s weird. 49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

      Stalk people’s social medias? 50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

      Grey 51. Ever wished you were someone else?

      I wish I was Vanessa Hudgens. 52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

      I won’t write it here 53. Favourite makeup brand?

      NYX. Cheap and good. 54. Favourite store?

      Target 55. Favourite blog?

      My own. 56. Favourite colour?

      Pink or Green. Depends on the day.57. Favourite food? 

      Anything with pasta or rice 58. Last thing you ate?

      pasta 59. First thing you ate this morning?

      beef jerkey. I have weird cravings60. Ever won a competition? For what?

      For being the world’s most emotional bitch 61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

      Hell no. Stay in school kids. 62. Been arrested? For what?

      Nope.63. Ever been in love? 

      Yep. Still don’t kiss and tell. 64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

      I know I just said I don’t kiss and tell but this isn’t talking about the person. Wet. Gross. Sloppy as fuck. They were shit at kissing. 65. Are you hungry right now?

      Nah. 66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

      I have one tumblr friend. He’s a pal. 67. Facebook or Twitter?

      Twitter68. Twitter or Tumblr?

      Twitter. I’ll make one for this blog soon. 69. Are you watching tv right now?

      No I’m listening to Miss Independent by Kelly Clarkson. 70. Names of your bestfriends? 

      Kim, Michelle, Jessica71. Craving something? What?

      Nothing. 72. What colour are your towels?

      Pink and green72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

      It used to be two until I got a new giant pillow this week. 73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

      I have them. I don’t sleep with them. 74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

      Four. I just counted. 75. Favourite animal?

      Meerkats 76. What colour is your underwear?

      Pink. 77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

      Vanilla 78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

      Strawberry79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

      Grey and pink 80. What colour pants?

      Dark grey and green - I’m in house clothes I don’t match 81. Favourite tv show?

      Jane the Virgin 82. Favourite movie?

      Hairspray 83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

      Mean Girls. The second one was trash 84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

      Mean Girls85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

      SHE DOESN’T EVEN GO HERE 86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

      Bruce87. First person you talked to today?

      Joey?88. Last person you talked to today?

      Joey. What the hell. 89. Name a person you hate?

      Hm they don’t need their name here90. Name a person you love?

      My brother91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

      Someone from work 92. In a fight with someone?

      Nah I don’t deal with that bs 93. How many sweatpants do you have?

      None. I do leggings tho ( I think I have 7 or 8)94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

      2 hoodies 95. Last movie you watched?

      The Green Book96. Favourite actress?

      Anne Hathaway? 97. Favourite actor?

      Mark Hamill 98. Do you tan a lot?

      I burn a lot. I’m pale99. Have any pets?

       No 100. How are you feeling?

        Alright. Kinda pumped bc my fav cover of Come Together came on (from the Justice League movie)101. Do you type fast?

        Yes but this is still taking me a while to get through 102. Do you regret anything from your past?

        Hell yeah. No tea is being spilled tho103. Can you spell well?

        If I have a pen and paper I’m decent. 104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

        I miss some ppl yeah. Adulting sucks bc you can’t see everyone all the time105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

        Lol that was the only rebellious thing I would do in high school 106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

        Not that I know of? 107. Have you ever been on a horse?

        Yes I love horseback riding 108. What should you be doing?

        Studying for the GRE109. Is something irritating you right now?

        Boring drama stuff. I won’t go into details. I’ll get over it. 110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

        Everyone has. 111. Do you have trust issues?

        Sis you already asked this. Yes. 112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

        My mom? I was crying bc I could fit into old shirts 113. What was your childhood nickname?

        Family calls me Kari. Friends call me Rina114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

        Yep. Last month. 115. Do you play the Wii?

        We play Netflix on the wii116. Are you listening to music right now?

        “I am Woman” by Jordan Sparks 117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

        Only from a can. I hate soup. 118. Do you like Chinese food?

        Fuck me up with crab rangoons 119. Favourite book?

        Eragon120. Are you afraid of the dark?

        I don’t like not being able to see. So sure. 121. Are you mean?

        I’m a dick to those I care about. Sorry. 122. Is cheating ever okay?

        Absolutely not. Dump their ass. 123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

        Nope. 124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

        I believe in infatuation at first sight125. Do you believe in true love?

         Not sure 126. Are you currently bored?

        I was till I started this 127. What makes you happy?

        anime, superheros, nerdy shit, music and makeup 128. Would you change your name?

        No. I used to want to as a child. 129. What your zodiac sign?

        Cancer. 130. Do you like subway?

        No. It’s gross. 131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

        Politely decline132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

        Already answered. 133. Favourite lyrics right now?

        “Yoko Ono, she got that Yoko OnoYou know that shit that made John Lennon go soloKnow that shit gotta be lethalIf that pussy broke up The Beatles” - Jay Z

Murder by Justin Timberlake (Featuring Jay Z)134. Can you count to one million?

        I could. I don’t want to though.135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

        Not sure. 136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

        Closed. 137. How tall are you?

        Five foot. Three inches. 138. Curly or Straight hair?

        My hair is wavy. I like both.139. Brunette or Blonde?

        I’m a brunette140. Summer or Winter?

        summer141. Night or Day?

        day 142. Favourite month?

        october143. Are you a vegetarian?

        nope but i’ve considered. 144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

        dark chocolate. I’m old. 145. Tea or Coffee?

        tea - coffee gives me the shits 146. Was today a good day?

        It was decent. 147. Mars or Snickers?

        Mars148. What’s your favourite quote?

        “It’s not who we are underneath, it’s what we do that defines us.” - Batman Begins 149. Do you believe in ghosts?

        Yes and No150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? (via catscuddlingandyou)

         GRE prep book “Directions:” It said more but my fingers hurt from typing all day.