#is my partner codependent
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malevoversary day 3: addison / guilt
[ID: An artwork of John Doe and Arthur Lester from Malevolent. Arthur is looking to the side with a happy expression, gesturing with his hand. John is behind him, with a furrowed brow and yellow linework. A pile of skulls surround them, and Kayne is in the background grinning. Above John are the words 'The Undefeated'. End ID.]
#you were right arthur he sure was undefeated#me when i do unspeakable things to get back to my codependent partner <3#malevolent#malevolent podcast#malevoversary#malevoversary2024#john doe#john malevolent#arthur lester#kayne#kayne malevolent#axis art
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rereading the hivebent commentary makes me so annoyed that people are never really willing to analyze the actual effects that alternian culture clearly had on every troll, especially the highbloods. pretty much the only troll who ever actually gets taken in the context of her upbringing is vriska.
no one ever seems willing to think about the character arcs of trolls like equius and terezi, who are also bluebloods with extremely hypocritical and toxic understandings of the people around them-- equius is boiled down to a gross creep who is just like that naturally and definitely didn't get it from his society in any way, whilst terezi is scrubbed of virtually all her flaws and turned into a strange sort of woke love interest character who is all about being gay and too cool to be tricked by any of the alternian propaganda. quadrants? classism? how silly! terezi would never believe in stupid shit like that. she's quirky! and GAY!
despite the fact that equius and terezi both obviously have much, much more to their personalities than that-- and the alternian empire is informing way more dangerous things about these kid's beliefs than "you can kiss your enemies".
#hsmeta#op#terezi wants to be a cop and views herself as responsible for vriska BECAUSE of her hypocritical ideas of justice#shes NOT just obsessed with dealing with vriska because shes interested in her - she has weird freak codependency because of COP HYPOCRISY#she is also gay for vriska but thats part of the Turmoil. thats part of her struggle with her motivations.#terezi thinks shes Holier Than Everyone and that shes the only one who can kill vriska w/o it being 'petty revenge'#while ignoring that she's actually the one with more emotional investment in vriska than ANYBODY#man there are so many interesting things to say about terezi but everyone is too busy making her the mouthpiece for their Woke Jokes#bcuz they actually think terezi is woke. and not a deeply confused and distraught girl with more issues than bones#i also like equius but ive made posts abt him before. lol#homestuck#i could talk about eridan and feferi and gamzee too actually#and how i rarely ever see anyone talk about them In The Context Of Alternia. its always just oh well they did a bad thing that annoyed me.#vriska gets hundreds of thousands of pages of discourse into why alternia / her upbringing affected her actions. but nobody else does#idk. i went on for too long in these tags already LOL#btw the inspo for this post was my lovely partner as usual#💫
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the thing about me is that i will ship kimharry harrydora and jeanharry with equal levels of pounding the floor and screaming and sobbing. like they’re all the love of his life but in different ways and it makes me wanna chew through the hull of a battleship
#the man who pulled you out of darkness and made you want to live again with the sheer force of his iron self-esteem and sense of justice#the woman you gave a decade of your life to who epitomized love and beauty and who forced you to accept#that some piece of your heart will always remain outside your body—fundamentally out of your control#the Heterosexual Life Partner you became codependent on through a cycle of unending trauma—whose rage at you was transformed#into the very force of your survival#gee harry how come your mom lets you have THREE soulmates#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#dora ingerlund#jean vicquemare#kimharry#harrydora#jeanharry#my posts#meta
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Reading Temeraire is just seeing the most romantic dialogue you've ever laid your eyes on only to have to grapple with the fact that it's said between a man and his dragon
#“no my dear. i would rather have you than any ship in the navy”#“if i belong to anyone it is you. and you to me”#“i only felt i would rather be with you than sleep alone”#“although if you very much wished to i suppose i would not mind” said with the BIGGEST side eye and insincerity#about Laurence getting married#incredible dynamic sometimes the most important being in your life is your platonic codependent 12 ton dragon#anyway of course i latch onto codependent life partner dynamics as badly and intensly as i do#if this is what i read when i was 10/11#anyway i finally got the complete english series lets go#temeraire#william laurence
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it confuses me when people say they like willow or xander and then get all uncomfortable and condemning about, like... major parts about them. you don't like that they're wildly possessive of which often leads them to acting irrational and awful...... which is like one of their biggest traits? oh, and you hate that they're not fantastic friends to buffy............. which is also like. how they are. pretty much the entire time we know them. okay!
wow, you find xander to be annoying bc he's a dumb dude who seriously needs to unlearn some ideals and really outta treat his girlfriends nicer. I'm dismayed at his typical guy-ness. bummer, we don't enjoy that willow is like totally abusive when it comes to exerting whatever power can get over people. that sure is a bad thing she does.
I just. I like them BECAUSE of these things idk how the hell you could possibly separate these things from them and still enjoy these characters it boggles my mind
#these are the most common complaints I have seen from people who say they enjoy one of or both of these characters#and it makes me ????#also once again bc I've talked about this before there something SERIOUSLY codependent and unhealthy going on with the core scoobies#NONE of them treat their partners all that great tbh it's just xander gets the most shit for it bc he's ig the most obvious about it#sorry but despite willow's love what she did to tara clearly shows she could've and would've been worse to her if she wanted to#she had the potential for being a worse gf it just didn't manifest until later and tara shut that shit DOWN quick#and even then there are little things like why the hell was tara never properly integrated into the scoobies. a forever outsider#this is my girlfriend willow and her girlfriend tara. that is the dynamic of the scoobs + tara be fr#also ik this is the xander harris hate site and you'll probably see me as being kind here but I genuinely think y'all hate on him too much#he is not that awful? he's not like the best person but oh my god guys this is INSANE how much we hate this guy#I'll admit the narrative does him fucking dirty the way it treats him as so good. but xander himself is such an interesting character imo#anyways. I like both of these characters bc they are not good people to those they care about despite sincerely truly loving them#and that is SO fun to explore and examine#willow rosenberg#xander harris#btvs#buffy the vampire slayer
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hate when my friends are dating people and then I have to hang out with the people they’re dating. literally who is that. idgaf about them!
#where’s the post about your friend’s boyfriend#idk what it says. hes like a coworker or enemy or something I can’t remember but its so true#one of my college friends just got MARRIED (she’s very happy im happy for her as well) but now next time I visit her I have to also hang out#with her HUSBAND????#who is that!#visiting my other friend soon but I have to hang w her AND her codependent serious partner#I’m not bitter. Genuinely. I just would simply rather hang out with my friends I already have
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every once in a while i rewatch legends of tomorrow and go oh wow snart and mick had something really gay going on i forgot how gay it was.
#the dog stuff. throwing around 'partner' all the time.#they did 'painful unraveling of coldwave lifelong codependency' in season 1 and then it was the only good part of the show#so in s2 they did it again in the other direction.#i could talk about their dynamic more but when i think about it too much it makes my heart curl up in a ball so i dont think i will#legends of tomorrow#coldwave#leonard snart#mick rory#the flash
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me thinking about what couples counseling question i want to have them answer at the end of this chapter that shows their deeply fucked up relationship hehe
#couples counseling au#obikin#couples counseling questionnaire: has your partner ever crossed a boundary of yours? how did that make you feel?#these unhealthy idiots: what's a boundary.#space google: oh like a line in the sand#obikin: oh! ok. once he crossed an enemy's line to pick up my half dead body and haul me to safety that made me feel all warm and good#is that anything#couples counselor reading these answers: oh my god we were genuinely saved by the most codependent stupidest fucks in the whole galaxy
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Bout to muse about something that is part headcanon part canon events
ㅤ
Tails is finally saved from his bullies by the (currently) small time hero he admires
Tails stalks follows his hero, uses his mechanical knowledge to improve Sonic's plane
While Tails follows Sonic around, even on dangerous journeys, the hedgehog keeps an eye out for the younger fox behind him, keeping him from being in too much danger
Sonic leads by example, demonstrating to Tails how to fight, and Tails runs maintenance on Sonic's plane and teaches him how to read
Soon enough, they become softly inseparable. Even if they can't adventure side by side (although they do more often than not), Sonic keeps contact with Tails whenever he can.
They strengthen each other's weak points. Where Tails lacks in raw strength, Sonic makes up for it with experience and speed. Where Sonic lacks in firepower, Tails has a machine, a gadget, or the technical know-how to take one. Sonic often rushes into danger, fighting without thinking too hard, but Tails' specialty is strategizing or making plans, and he's one of the few who can slow Sonic down enough to make sure he's prepared. And where Sonic supports Tails by being a force of nature, someone who can roll with the punches and execute one of Tails' plans with complete trust or faith, Tails also supports Sonic by understanding what he cannot, by crafting plans when Sonic is at a loss for how to proceed. They have such unwavering faith and trust in each other's abilities now.
Where Sonic is a hero, Tails is his own kind of hero, saving the people only he can save, helping in the ways only he can help. They support each other. They look out for each other. Even if Sonic is a force on his own, or Tails can go on solo adventures, they're more effective when they're together.
And no matter how things change as they grow, the people who come and go, the two of them are a constant. Sonic and Tails, ever at each other's sides.
#sonic the hedgehog#sontails#unbreakable bond#miles tails prower#tails the fox#i just be ramblin#Sorry they just make me emotional and insane#Although really the only thing that's solidly a headcanon and not either canon or my reading of them is that Tails teaches Sonic how to read#Despite them being 'hero and sidekick' I always like to think that as they grew (both up and closer to each other) and as time passed#they maintained this push and pull. They slotted into place as partners that support each other and help where the other falters#And really no matter what happens relationship wise or life wise with the two of them‚ I can only imagine that they still live and fight#together#Tails could get married and Sonic would still crash at his place and Tails would still keep food for him#Sonic could get married and/or have a kid with someone and Tails would move right in with them (if they don't just straight up stay with#Tails)#No matter what happens I can never see them not at each other's sides#And of course I like the idea of Tails starting out a bit more codependent but ultimately someone who works to support Sonic so he can#continue to be needed/wanted and be at his side‚ while Sonic‚ who initially believes that he let Tails into his life and is protecting him‚#grows more secretly codependent. I think Tails is aware of how important Sonic is in his life (even if Tails has interests and wants and#whatnot outside of him)#while Sonic is...the kind of guy who believes that he chooses to keep Tails by his side‚ but whose world would also begin to crumble if#Tails disappeared (and I think Sonic Prime gives me pretty good ammo with that)#Gaaaaaah they just fascinate me. they fascinate me🥺😭💖
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eternally fond of writing princess luz and hunter's relationship because it's mostly just hunter going "honestly i'm really lucky. most people never find someone they want to kill and die for forever at any given moment. i don't know why i'd ever get upset about being so loyal to you that i will unquestioningly let you kill me to death" while luz is like [actively crying with gratitude] "you are so fucking crazy. stop being nice to me."
#like as potentially toxic codependency goes they truly do have it figured out.#hunter is the reigning champion of 'don't make me unpack the psychological issues that make this feel good to me. just let me feel good#about it' while luz is like 'we are both so crazy. hunter we are both crazy'#meanwhile literally everyone around them is like hey do you two need a parent and/or a life partner and/or a nap. asking for a friend#im not done writing/talking about them im just really distracted by real life things#you know all the like. recovering from horrible illness and cleaning my house and going outside etc.#toh#horrible nightmare trauma pals#princess luz au
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Incredibly random and obscure Hot Take:
Ghost shouldn't have been Emmalyn
Ghost should have been Janus
#HEAR ME OUT#ghost is *checks notes* blue-eyed obsessed with zane and has a jealous streak#emmalyn is fine ig dont get me wrong#but since Ghost was literally made to add MCD lore into MYS#wouldnt it have made more sense for it to be Janus?? who was mentioned but never met in the og diares because they DIED#imagine being so dedicated to your partner/whatever those codependent fuckers were that your soul cant depart#not until you find him again#not until you know hes safe#you forget everything but him#thats incredibly janus coded imo#thank you for coming to my ted talk#janus the silver death#mystreet ghost#ghost mystreet#minecraft diaries#mystreet#emmalyn mcd#mcd
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i’m currently reading wuthering heights and am drowning in thoughts of mutual obsession and codependency and unhealthy relationships oh my goooood
#; ophie speaks#codependency my beloved <3#jason is so so SO codependent you cannot convince me otherwise#same with könig#both have the ‘my partner is mad at me so i’ll kms’ energy#and i LOVE it
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this was three months into dating my now-husband, and it's never stopped feeling like this
#love is real 😭💕#a love that defined and redeemed you#don't look at me#being with justin is its own reward because he's wonderful#but I'm also better for loving him. for his loving me. for being met where I am with sincerity and understanding and joy#I don't have to be defensive and neurotic all the time from feeling intrinsically Not Good Enough#and being relaxed and safe has made me a BETTER person#and a MUCH!! better partner jesus CHRIST.#anxious codependent miserable low-self-esteem jay is Not A Very Good Girlfriend but it wasn't her fault. it wasn't her fault.#anyway [face in my hands] I love my boy#about me#husband
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anyway i haven’t talked abt this a lot on here but i am realizing lately. that the last eight-ish months. i have been kinda going through a slow-motion breakup with the person i had been anticipating my future with for many years. which. contextualizes a lot i think. about how bad i’ve been doing.
#she will always be one of my best friends. but i also readily thought of her as my life partner in a lot of ways.#and it’s not like we were in some codified partner relationship. but that’s how she Functioned for me. we did everything together.#and she has found someone else she plans to do life with now.#and i don’t begrudge her that. i want her to be happy.#and i know she loves me.#it’s just been hard for me. to adjust to.#like. we’re not actually broken up. she’s not Gone. nobody Left. she’s always going to be in my life in some capacity.#but i am having to significantly readjust my support system to accommodate a lot Less of her#both now and in the future.#it’s hard to have your Primary Person suddenly take a much different role in your life.#my codependency issues have made this whole situation rly hard for me to parse. but i need to like. give myself some credit.#it’s hard. and it’s okay that it’s hard. it doesn’t make me wrong or bad.#izzy.txt
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just listened to partners in crime by madilyn mei and idk if I can convey how obsessed I am
#oh. my god I’ve said the dynamic ever before but THIS#THIS IS THE FUCKING DYNAMIC EVER#I NEED THIS SONG INJECTED INTO MY VEINS#UAGH#I need to write something about it so badly#But idk if I can ever be talented enough to put that dynamic into words like the song does#the fucking messiness of it all the codependency the knowledge that they’re being used#And still loving it because they love them#the feeling at the end of you’re using me but I’m dragging us both down in the end#the insanity.#partners in crime#madilyn mei#listen to this I beg you
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Mann….out of all the things my brain could of brought up to wallow in RIGHT before going to sleep did it really have to be the realisation that I’m like. Completely alone in the world. I genuinely have no stable, healthy relationship like at all. Not even with myself. I know I don’t deserve nor am capable of forming and maintaining a relationship of any sort but like GOD DAMNNNN
#maybe not totally alone in the world#got my mom and dad but#lets the brutally real for a second#that shit is the most fragile on and off atomic bomb codependency with a side of walking on eggshells and caretaker burnout#i guess i just mean that i dont have any healthy relationship in my life atm#fun.#also getting that middle of the night urge to text my old bsf who basically ghosted me#rationally its not a good idea#which is whats keeping me from doing it#but man do i want to be passive agressive#bitter#fond#well wishing#wanting to start over when we’re older#a mess of all of the above#oh btw moots#im sorry but#as much as I appreciate the lil interactions we have#its hardly comparable to a relationship#perhaps some of us could become friends if it wasnt for the fact that i know full well im not#im not a good person to be friends with trust#especially right now#all you’d be getting would be a clingy mess who cares little about you actually because im selfish lile that#literally all I want to do is play the games i like together and seldom try yours#i think i make for a fun conversation partner but thats about it#and even then i interrupt and butt in all the time#also dealing with my indirect venting through my posts and therefore worryng about me ending my life would also be unhealthy asf#trust me i know i have many times gone through being friends/generally caring and worrying about someone who self harms/wants to die#it is a nightmare to deal with when you genuinely care for them#so please dont get attached like that to me
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