#is it in a single theater in the US despite this being the official US release day? sources unclear. doesnt seem likely
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pagesofkenna · 5 days ago
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monte cristo 2024 good
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thisonesatellite · 2 years ago
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i was tagged by the lovely and wonderful @booksandabeer . Thank you, darling. (Transatlantic is now officially on my watch list.)
last song: People of the Sun - Rage Against The Machine
Rage slaps harder than coffee and sometimes i need that in the morning.
last show: Shadow & Bone S2
Yes. i know i'm so behind. But last year work was such that i fell behind on everything and i've spent this whole year so far catching up. i have managed to binge Stranger Things S3 AND S4 (do you see how far behind i was?), Obi Wan, Book of Boba Fett, Mandalorian S3, and The Last of Us, as well as make a small dent in the back catalogue in the shape of Leverage, Leverage Redemption, Dopesick, and The Librarians. All since December. So do not come at me with my tardiness. i'm doing my best. 😘
last movie: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.3
i have gone to see every single MCU movie since Iron Man on opening night and despite the MCU's descent into madness and disappointment i can't stop now, you feel me. Having said that i think that Guardians was a good movie, not least because it was refreshingly self contained. i loved the fact that for a change the entire Fate Of The Universe And Everyone In It did not hang in the balance. As Angela says in Bones, "Sometimes you don't save the world. Sometimes you just make your friend happy." EXACTLY.
Also, James Gunn listened to the exact same albums as a teenager as i did, i will die on that hill. Obscure 80s British post punk anyone? Late 70s Springsteen? Parliament, Cheap Trick, Spacehog, Faith No More, Three Dog Night, fucking X? The fact that Gunn plastered a The The song across one of the emotional turning points of this movie - i almost stood up and clapped. IN THE MOVIE THEATER. (i would never. i am the person who will ask you to stop talking if you sit next to me and don't shut up. And i will be firm about it.)
If Star-Lord ever returns to the tunes of New Model Army or Mother Love Bone, i will die.
currently watching: Justified and The Umbrella Academy S3.
Still trying to make a dent in the current and back-catalogue watchlist. Do not say the word Witcher in my presence. 😂 Or Ted Lasso, which i will binge the moment the last ep drops, no matter what series i'm in the middle of. Also, now i had to put @booksandabeer's rec Transatlantic on the list WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.
currently reading: DOES IT LOOK LIKE i HAVE TIME TO READ RIGHT NOW? i BARELY HAVE TIME TO WRITE. 😂 But actually, if audiobooks count, i'm listening to An Economic History of The World since 1400 (from The Great Courses), because macroeconomics are fucking fascinating, ok? i think macroeconomic trends, constraints, and ambitions are the only reason human beings as a whole have ever done anything, ever, (and by macroeconomics i don't mean money).
All this while a stack of books collects dust on my night stand.
current obsession: the aforementioned macroeconomics, stucky (there's the historical event AND a cold war east germany spy fic to write, i'm looking at you @bittersweet-in-boston). There is also an epic dramione idea i had last year which is starting to seriously snap at my heels. i might have to visit that sandbox again. (Forgive me @mysteriouscatstellation)
Also, how do i get rid of the need to sleep? Those are hours i could use, people. Anyone have tips?
Damn, this got so long. That was way more answer than any of you were looking for, wasn't it.
Absolutely zero-pressure-tags: @cable-knit-sweater, @crisis-froggo, @mwritesff, @voylitscope, @controlofwhatido, @ace-in-reserve
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openingnightposts · 1 year ago
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lyssified · 2 years ago
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tech week rants n rambles yall know the drill
things that are sparking joy right now:
props crew bc at my friends' theater, her props crew is like, evil. and our props crew is GREAT!! shout out to props i love them!!
how amazing collignon's mother and father look together. like their costumes are so european grandparentcore it's actually insane. they look great and they have great dynamic. plus it's fun to quick change their wigs
we did 5 songs today bringing our speed up to 1.42 songs per hour!!
some actors are so speedy with their quick changes like shout out to our Bretodeau/Collignon's Father/Adrien for playing every character ever and being so great about turning every single one of his changes from a 4 person job to a 1 person job
when the booth goes bright is officially the serotonin song because of the little dancey dances that the cast does, it's the most dancey number in the show and i'm in the process of learning it so i can dance to it in the wings
adding to the thing above, if you know the lyrics there's a bit about the girl from the factory and we have 2 dancers doing that whole bit as a piece of choreo while nino sings about it
things that are not sparking joy right now:
we are STILL NOT DONE WITH ACT 1
despite there being 2 days until opening :)
i think it's officially accepted that we're not finishing teching this play
rip Amelie 2023 i guess
this is so real and true of us
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poppy-in-the-woods · 3 years ago
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Tongo, tongo, tongo (Or How Benidorm Fest ended being Steal Fest).
So, Spain just celebrated Benidorm Fest to chose our representative/s in Eurovision and let me tell you, half Spain is not happy at all with the results, including me.
Maybe nobody cares about this, but I have to get it out of my chest.
This year was very special for me because of a song: Terra, by the Galician trio Tanxugueiras (pronounced something like tan-shoo-GAY-rahs). It's a song that is very traditional but modern at the same time. Some people have even called Tanxugueiras "electro-meigas". Meigas is what we call witches in Galicia (for those who don't know, Galicia is that bit right above Portugal). We speak Galician and Spanish, we have Celtic roots, and often our culture is depreciated, ridiculed and ultimately, disregarded and forgotten. As you may have guessed, I am from this region of Spain, so it hits close to the heart.
Terra was one of the candidates this year, and everyone and their mother was very excited about it. There were people in other parts of Spain who didn't understand a single word of the song, saying the music spoke to them, supporting Tanxugueiras. Roughly two thirds of Spain were prepared to have them perform at Turin. Even some people outside Spain were saying things like "if you don't select them as your representation, you'll be foolish, that's the best song".
There were other songs, of course, and other people had other favorites. Eventually, it was almost a tie between them and Rigoberta Baldini's song, Ay Mamá, which was somewhat of a feminist ode to mothers. At least a tie regarding popular vote, though Tanxugueiras were a bit ahead. The jury... well, let's not speak of them or I'll start to break stuff.
Anyway, do you know who won?
None of them.
The "winner", was Chanel's generic pop song with English words and reggaeton flavor nº 364, SloMo. Which is fine to those who like that kind of music (not me), but personally I feel like it's the 10th attempt to do what Eleni Foureira did (and better done) in 2018 with Fuego.
We had an opportunity to do something different, and the jury threw it down the drain, despite what the public wanted.
Now there's people saying SloMo does not fulfill the requisites of Benidorm Fest to have the songs written in an official language (Spanish), a co-official one (Galician, Catalan, or Basque, mainly), and also don't have more than a certain percentage of the words in English. Which, give the song is written in Spanglish, I am inclined to believe it's true.
Feels like we've been robbed. Others have articulated it better than me, but basically, those of us who supported either Tanxugueiras or Rigoberta feel like the song was already chosen to begin with and the whole Benidorm Fest was nothing more than a game or a play to give us some sense of participation, like we, the public, were actually deciding for once in the last 10 years. Just theater, but nothing of substance.
I have nothing against Chanel as an artist, but it can't be a coincidence that the winner is the one with the major music label behind and with professional connections to members of the jury. Now there also have arisen some accusations of plagiarism, which is a problem legally for the writers/composers of the song, since Chanel is only the performer, but things are not looking good overall.
End rant.
In case you liked Terra and want to listen to more songs by Tanxugueiras, I'll leave you with my two favorites, Midas and Figa, but you can find their whole albums on Spotify as well, and their videoclips are worth a watch (I didn't link them to keep things neutral, but they're easy to find).
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somesortofcoincidence · 2 years ago
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I’ve come to a big realization last night.
The version of Goncharov I’ve been trying to imagine in my head and even write scripts for with specific scenes in mind…has been a completely different head canon compared to the consensus.
Firstly, it wasn’t released in 1973, it was released in 1978. Pre-production and casting began in 1973. Production officially started in 1975. Maybe there’s a chance Matteo directed the film at first, but then Martin Scorsese had to take over directing duties for the production after an incident happened on set that caused Matteo to be kicked out of the production prematurely. Literally the best guess I have as to what happened is that Matteo had his own interpretation of the story being told in the unreleased draft while Martin Scorsese had his own interpretation of the film that didn’t quite match with Matteo’s. I genuinely don’t know. Maybe they had a fight about what the ending of the film was supposed to be. The only thing the two directors could agree on was that it ended with two characters on a bridge.
Nevertheless, Martin Scorsese became director of the picture and rewrote the whole script in order to fit in everything that he wanted to see happen in the film. For example, the entire film took place across 3 different cities in 3 different countries: Moscow, Russia, Naples, Italy, and New York City, New York. Another key change was the use of symbolism in order to establish a more subtle homoerotic subtext rather than just have all the main characters kissing each other. Finally, Andrey became Goncharov’s best friend. He wasn’t a crossdresser in the film. And keep this in mind too, all of these changes weren’t done in order to comply with the Hays Code. That was officially disbanded in November of 1968. So, there wasn’t any initial problems with the film being released.
Even if Matteo was still directing the film at around this time with his original vision in mind, the film would’ve still been released in theaters. But not in mainstream theaters. They could have been released in the same places that were known for showing sexploitation and blaxploitation films as well as cheap porn flicks. The world would’ve treated Matteo’s original vision for Goncharov, in the 1970’s, as cheap, lewd garbage. I wouldn’t blame Matteo for holding some kind of resentment towards Scorsese for changing almost every single aspect of the film from top to bottom in the way that he did. But Martin Scorsese just wanted to make a movie about a tragic character who loses their identity to the vices of their success and then loses everything they built after becoming too powerful to control.
Eventually, from what I could find through my research is that, despite production for the rest of the film going smoothly under Scorsese’s direction, the film lost its original identity from Matteo’s directorial vision; very much so in the same vain as the main character of Goncharov himself. Maybe that 1973 version of Goncharov became a classic under the weight of its own merit. But after thinking about this whole debate for a while, I’ve only ever reached the same conclusion time and time again when switching back and forth between directors. No matter who it was sitting in the director’s chair, this film was doomed to fail from the start.
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unpopularwiththepopulace · 3 years ago
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Michael Riedel vs Bernadette Peters – the Broadway Battle of 2003 and beyond
My previous piece gives a fairly comprehensive look at Bernadette and Gypsy through the ages; though there is at least one aspect of the 2003 revival that warrants further discussion:
Namely, Michael Riedel.
Today’s essay question then: “Riedel – gossip columnist extraordinaire, the “Butcher of Broadway”, spited male vindictive over not getting a lunch date with Bernadette Peters, or puppet-like mouthpiece of theatre’s shadowed elite? Discuss.”
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It’s matter retrievable in print, or even kept alive in apocryphal memory throughout the theatre community to this day that Riedel was responsible for a campaign of unrelenting and caustic defamation against Bernadette as Rose in Gypsy around the 2003 season.
While “tabloids may [have been] sniping and the Internet chat rooms chirping”, when looking back at the minutiae, none were more vocal, prolific or influential in colouring early judgment than the “chief vulture [of] Mr. Riedel, who had written a string of vitriolic columns in which he said from the start that Ms. Peters was miscast”.
He continued to find other complaints and regularly attack her in print over an extended period of time.
Why? We’ll get there. There are a few theories to suggest. Firstly, how and what.
Primary to establish is that it perhaps would be foolish to expect anything else of Riedel.
Also an author and radio and TV show host, Riedel is best known as the “vituperative and compulsively readable” theatre columnist at The New York Post.
He’s a man who thrives on controversy, decrying: “Gossip is life!”
The man who says, “I’m a wimp when it comes to physical violence, but give me a keyboard and I’ll kill ya.”
“Inflicting pain, for him, is a jokey thing. ‘Michael has this cruel streak and a lack of empathy,’ says Susan Haskins, his close friend and co-host.”
And inflicting pain is what he did with Bernadette, in a saga that has become one of the most talked about and enduring moments of his career.
From the beginning, then.
Riedel started work at The Post in 1998.
His first words on Bernadette? “Oddly miscast in the Ethel Merman role,” in August of that year on Annie Get Your Gun. It was a sentiment he would carry across to his second mention six months later (“a seemingly odd choice to play the robust Annie Oakley”), and also across to the heart of his vitriolic coverage on her next Merman role in Gypsy.
 Negative coverage on Bernadette in Gypsy started in August 2002 when Riedel discussed the search for trying to find a new American producer for the show. It had initially been reported in late 2000 that a Gypsy revival with Bernadette was planned for London, before it was to transfer to Broadway. To begin with, Arthur Laurents was “eager to do Gypsy in London because it hadn't been seen in the West End since 1973”, and he “wanted to repeat [the] dreamlike triumph” he said Angela Lansbury’s production had been. But economic matters prevented this original plan, leaving the team looking for new producers in the US. Riedel suggested that Fran and Barry Wiessler step up as, “after all, they managed to sell the hell out of "Annie Get Your Gun," in which Peters…was also woefully miscast.”
He also quipped: “Industry joke: "Bernadette Peters in 'Gypsy'? Isn't she a little old to be playing Baby June?”, calling her “cutesy Peters” and again a “kewpie doll”.
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Bernadette here seen side by side with the actual Baby June of the 2003 production – Kate Reinders.
Other publications to this point had discussed her “unusual” casting. Which was fairly self-evident. In contrast to being a surprising revelation that Bernadette Peters was not, in fact, Ethel Merman, this had been the intention from the start. Librettist Arthur “Laurents – whose idea it was to hire her – [said] going against type is exactly the point,” and Sam Mendes, as director, qualified “the tradition of battle axes in that role has been explored”.
It was Riedel who was the first to shift the focus from the obvious point that she was ‘differently cast’, to instead attach the negative prefix and intone that she was actually ‘MIS’ cast. According to him then, she was unsuitable, and would be unable to “carry the show, dramatically or vocally”. All before she had so much as sung a note or donned a stitch of her costume.
So no, it wasn’t then “the perception, widely held within the theater industry,” as he presented it, “that Peters is woefully miscast as Mama Rose”.
It was Riedel’s perception. And he took it, and ran with it, along with whatever else he could throw into the mix to drag both her and the show down for the next two years.
 As to another indication of how one single columnist can influence opinion and warp wider perception, just look to Riedel’s assessment of the show’s first preview. It is typically known as Riedel’s forte to “[break] with Broadway convention, [where] he attends the first night of previews, and reports on the problems…before the critics have their say”. This gives him “clout” by way of mining “terrain that goes relatively uncovered elsewhere”, and it means subsequent journals are frequently looking to him from whom to take their lead – and quotes.
At Gypsy’s opening preview then, he reported visions of “Arthur Laurents [charging] up the aisle…on fire”, loudly and vocally expressing his dissatisfaction with the show as he then “read Fox [a producer] the riot act”. Despite the fact that this was “not true, according to Laurents,” the damage was already done, with the sentiment of trouble and tension being subsequently reprinted and distributed out to the public across many a regional paper.
News travels fast, bad news travels faster.
 And news can be created at an ample rate, when in possession of one’s own regular periodical column. This recurring domain allowed plentiful opportunity for attack on Bernadette and Gypsy, and Riedel “began devoting nearly every column to the subject,” which amounted to weekly or even more frequent references.
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As the show progressed beyond its first preview, Riedel brought in the next aspects of his smear-campaign – assailing Bernadette for missing performances through illness and accusing Ben Brantley, who reviewed the show positively in The New York Times, of unfair favouritism and “hyperbolic spin”.
The issue is not that Bernadette was not in fact ill or missing performances. She was. She had a diagnosis at first of “a cold and vocal strain”, that then progressed more seriously to a “respiratory infection” the following week, and was “told by her doctors that she needs to rest”. So rest she did.
The issue is the way in which Riedel depicted the situation and her absences via hyperbole and “insinuating she was shirking” responsibility. He went further than continual, repeated mentions and cruel article titles like “wilted Rose”, or “sick Rose losing bloom”, or “beloved but - ahem-cough-cough-ahem - vocally challenged and miscast star”. He went as far as the sensationalist and degrading action of putting “Peters' face on the side of a milk carton, the kind of advertisement typically used to recover lost children,” and asking readers to look out for “bee-stung lips, [a] high-pitched voice, [and a] kewpie doll figure”, who “may be clutching a box of tissues and a love letter from Ben Brantley”.
It was quantified in May of 2003 after the show had officially opened, that “out of the 39 performances "Gypsy" has played so far, [Bernadette] has missed six – an absence rate of 15 percent.”
As an interesting comparison, it was reported in The Times in February 2002 that “‘The Producers' stars Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick have performed together only eight times in last 43 performances due to scheduling problems and health concerns,” – an absence rate of 81%.
Did Riedel have anything nearly as ardent to say about the main male stars of the previous season’s hit missing such a rate of performances? Of course not.
 Riedel arguably has a disproportionate rate for criticising female divas.
One need only heed his recommendations that certain women check into his illuminatingly named “Rosie's Rest Home for Broadway Divas.” Divos need not apply.
Not that he was unaware of this.
In 2004, Riedel would jovially lay out that “Liz Smith and I have developed a nice tag-team act: I bash fragile Broadway leading ladies who miss performances, and she rides to their rescue.”
Donna Murphy was the recipient of what he that year dubbed his “BERNADETTE PETERS ATTENDANCE AWARD”, when she began missing performances in “Wonderful Town”, due to “severe back and neck injuries and a series of colds and sinus infections”.
This speaks to his remarkably cavalier and joyful attitude with which he tears down shows and performers. “The more Mr. Riedel's work upsets people, the more he enjoys it.”
He knows he yields influence – it was recognised he had “eclipsed Ben Brantley as the single most discussed element in marketing meetings for Broadway shows” – and he delights in his capacity to lead shows to premature demises through his poison-tipped quill yielding.
When it was reported Gypsy would be closing earlier than had been planned, he made mention of “hop[ping] around on [its] grave” and debonairly applauding himself, “I suppose I can take some credit for bringing it down”.
 His premonition from the previous year’s Tony’s ceremony was both ominous and prescient, when he predicted the show’s failure to win any awards “could spell trouble at the box office”. He was right. It did. The 8.5 million dollar revival closed months before anticipated and failed to return a profit.
Multiple factors can be attributed to Gypsy’s poor success at the Tony’s, but it’s clear to say Riedel’s continual bashing leading up to the fated night throughout the voting period certainly didn’t help matters.
His suggestions to do with Bernadette’s performances were not helpful either.
After alleging Laurents as the director of the 1991 revival “practically beat a performance out of” Tyne Daly when she was struggling with the role, he proffers that to improve Bernadette’s success, “it may be time for [Laurents] to take up the switch and thrash one out of Peters”.
Great.
It was irresponsible and unrelenting commentary that did not go unnoticed.
His “ruthless heckling of beloved Broadway star Ms. Peters” was deemed in print “his most egregious stunt so far”.
Vividly, in person, Riedel was accosted at a party one night by Floria Lasky, the venerable showbiz lawyer, who “grab[bed] Riedel’s tie and jerk[ed] it, nooselike, scolding, ‘It was unfair, what you did to Bernadette’”.
Moreover, the wide-reaching influential hold Riedel occupied over the environment surrounding Gypsy was tangible in the fact his words spread beyond just average readers, and even unusually “started seeping into the reviews of New York's top critics”. Riedel himself, as the “chief vulture”, was indeed what Ben Brantley was referring to in his own New York Times review by stating how the production was “shadowed by vultures predicting disaster”.
Even more substantially, the “whole Peters-Riedel-Brantley episode” became its own enduring cultural reference – being converted into its very own “satiric cabaret piece, ‘Bernadette and the Butcher of Broadway’”. All three parties were featured, with Riedel characterised as the butcher, and it played Off-Broadway later in 2003 “to positive notices”.
 But penitent for his sins and begging for absolution Riedel was not. “Riedel saw nothing but a great story and a great time,” and for many years after, he would continue to hark back to the matter in self-referential (almost reverential) and flippant ways.
In 2008 as Patti LuPone won her Tony for her turn as Rose in the subsequent revival, Riedel couldn’t help but jibe, “Not to rip open an old wound, but I'd love to know if Bernadette Peters was watching”. (He neglects also to mention that “Mendes’s Gypsy was seen by 100,000 more people than saw Laurents’s and grossed $6 million more”.)
More jibes are to be found in 2012 as he reported on the auction after Arthur Laurents’ funeral, or even as recently in 2019, as he asked, “Remember the outcry that greeted Sam Mendes’ Brechtian “Gypsy,” with Bernadette Peters, in 2003?”
As with in 2004 where he points to the “pack of jackals who have been snarling” about Bernadette’s failures, this brings up the canny knack Riedel has of offloading his views to bigger and detached third party sources – thus absolving himself of personal centrality, and thus culpability.
If there was an outcry, HE was its loudest contributor. If there were snarling jackals, HE was their leader.
Maybe Riedel’s third person detached approach to referencing matters was intended to be a humorous stylistic quirk for those in the know. Or maybe it was his way of expressing some inner turmoil over the event.
In some rare display of morality and emotional authenticity, Riedel would at one point admit “I find it kind of sad and pathetic that the high point of my life supposedly has been about beating up on Bernadette Peters”.
Fortunately for him then, a degree of absolution was eventually achieved in 2018, where Riedel visited Bernadette at her opening night in Hello Dolly in 2018, with the intention of ending their “15-year feud”. He “got down on one knee at Sardi’s and extended his hand,” with Bernadette reportedly yelling “Take a picture!” while he held his deferential and obsequious position on the floor.
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So if eventually this “feud” has some kind of circular resolution and Riedel was glad it was over, why on earth did it begin in the first place?
One notion is that it was simply another day on the job. Riedel is a man who sees Broadway as “a game for rich people”. Positioned as an “an industry that brought in $720.9 million in the 2002-2003 season”, it is “not a fragile business”, he remarked. As such, he “[could not] fathom the point of donning kid gloves” in covering it, and reasoned the business as a whole was robust enough to weather a few hard knocks. “Thus, Riedel can coolly view Bernadette Peters as fair game, as opposed to, say, a national treasure”.
More to the point, he was a man in search of words. During the season in question, Riedel was “one of just three New York newspaper columnists covering the stage” – a “throwback to a bygone era when…Broadway gossipmeisters…such as Walter Winchell and Dorothy Kilgallen ruled”. Now at the time, as the “last of a great tabloid tradition”, Riedel presided over not just one but two columns a week at The Post. As a result, he was in need of content. “One of the reasons I've become more opinionated is I just have more space to fill,” he admitted. Robert Simonson hypothesises in his book ‘On Broadway Men, Still Wear Hats’ that Riedel may have consequently picked “the thrashing of Bernadette” as his main target simply because “it was a slow news cycle”. Options for ‘titillating’ and durable content were scarce elsewhere that season.
And after all, if Riedel would later cite Bernadette in an article concerning the Top 10 Powerhouses of Broadway in 2004, saying even despite a few knocks or bad shows, “she’ll bounce back” – surely there was no real damage done.
If her career wouldn’t be toppled by his continual public defamation and haranguing, what was the harm?
Feelings? Who cares about feelings or Bernadette’s extremely complex and personal history with the show stretching back to when she was a teenager.
It was just part of the territory, there was nothing personal in it.
 Or was there?
Maybe there was something personal in Riedel’s campaign after all.
He makes a curious comment while discussing ‘A Raisin in the Sun’ in 2004. The then incoming star of the show, rapper P. Diddy, had invited Riedel to dinner, and he makes judgement that this was “a smart p.r. move”. Then he ponders, “you do have to wonder: If Bernadette Peters had broken bread with me this time last year, would her chorus boys have to be out there now working the TKTS line to keep "Gypsy" afloat?”
Might he be going as far to suggest that if Bernadette had indulged him in a meal, her show might not have suffered so, by way of him being more inclined to cover it with greater lenience?
It may seem that way, at least in considering how Riedel reviewed P. Diddy’s performance thus after their dinner: “Riedel pronounced himself impressed. ‘He could have forgotten his lines or had to be carried offstage. He didn’t do anything terrible, he didn’t do anything astonishing.’”
Seemingly all the rapper had to do was remember some words and remain physically onstage, and he sails through scot-free. That’s a rather different outcome, one could say, to being absolutely eviscerated for what became a Tony nominated effort at one of the appreciably hardest and most demanding musical theatre roles in existence.
Though perhaps it’s hard to tell if that was really his insinuation from just one isolated comment pertaining to lunch.
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This argument might be fine, if it WAS the only isolated comment pertaining to wanting Bernadette to have lunch with him. But it isn’t. Riedel continues to make a further two references over protracted periods of time to the fact Bernadette hasn’t dined with him.
One begins to get the sense of him feeling desiring of or somewhat entitled to such a private lunch with the lady he’s verbally decimated for years, and a sense of bitter rejection that he hasn’t been granted one.
“If Tonya Pinkins doesn't win the Tony Award this year, I'll buy Bernadette Peters lunch,” he simpered, and later, “I invite Bernadette to be my guest for lunch at a restaurant of her choosing. She can reach me at The Post anytime she's hungry”.
The embittered columnist in this light takes on now the marred tinge of a small boy in the playground who doesn’t get to hold the hand of the girl he wants in front of his friends, so spends the next three years pushing her over in the sandpit in revenge.
Moreover, the last statement makes undeniable comment on Bernadette’s troubled relationship with food, body image and public eating.
So now not only so far has he insulted and mocked her physical appearance and played into all the usual trite shots calling her a “kewpie doll”; suggested Arthur Laurents violently hit her in order to elicit a better performance; continually publicly harassed her regarding a show that strikes close to the nerve with deep personal and psychological resonances due to her mother and childhood; but now he’s going for the low-blows of ridiculing her over her eating habits.
Flawless behaviour.
 Maybe it’s far-fetched to suggest a man would have such a fragile ego to run a multi-year public defamation campaign after so little as not getting his hypothesised fantasy of a personal lunch date. But then again, this was the man who “left Johns Hopkins University after his first year because of a broken heart.” (“I was in love with her; she wasn't in love with me,” he said.)
And also the man described as “an insomniac who pops the occasional Ambien,” living in a “small one-bedroom” that is “single-guy sloppy”, who has “been living alone since a four-year romance ended in 1996”.
The man whose own best friend called “cruel” and with a “lack of empathy”.
The man whose own sister answered that “well, yes,” he’s always been mean; and after being picked on as a kid for “being the small guy and the intellectual”, he grew dependent on using “his verbal ability to beat someone” and put himself in positions of defensive impenetrability.
See, writing Riedel-esque, vindictive and provocative conjecture is no especially challenging or cerebral task.
Riedel may well see his approach to ‘journalism’ or reporting as “all fun and games”.
But I for one am not laughing.
 One final aspect to address when considering Riedel’s reasoning for the depth of his coverage on Bernadette demands attention of how he gets his information. His own personal opinions and motivations aside, crucially he depends on insider providers for insider details. Perhaps somewhat alarmingly then, “leading Broadway producers themselves are among his sources”.
“Half of Broadway hates him. The other half leaks to him”, John Heilpern titled his 2012 Vanity Fair profile on Riedel.
As such, in frequently taking his lead from “theater folk, usually with an ax to grind”, Riedel acts as the mouthpiece to bring secretive backstage reports out front. High-up, influential characters are thus able to funnel their agendas into public view, while keeping their identities hidden.
Notably, it was raised in the above article that Riedel’s “merciless running story” regarding Bernadette in Gypsy “was fed by none other than its renowned librettist, Arthur Laurents—or, more precisely, by Laurents's lover”.
Contrary to the smiley picture below between members of the show’s creative team and it’s beloved star, it was no secret that Laurents did not like Mendes’ 2003 revival. Laurents told Riedel that “Sam did a terrible disservice to Bernadette and the play, and I wanted a Gypsy seen in New York that was good… You have to have musical theater in your bones, and Sam doesn't”. In fact, Laurents admitted the only reason his 2009 book ‘Mainly on Directing’ came into existence was because of how much he had to criticise about the show – it grew out of the extensive set of notes he gave Mendes.
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Additionally, it was no secret that Laurents’ lover, Tom Hatcher, demonstrated both a desire and capacity to influence Arthur’s productions. As well as being the driving force for the 2009 Spanish-speaking reworking of West Side Story, Hatcher had intense investment in Gypsy specifically. Patti LuPone writes in her memoir, “From his deathbed, Tom had told Arthur, ‘You have to do Gypsy, and you have to do it with Patti’. It was one of his dying wishes”. Laurents himself, in corroboration of this, explained Tom’s reasoning – “he didn't want the Sam Mendes production to be New York's last memory of Gypsy”.
The allegation in Heilpern’s profile might be hard to prove from an outsider perspective. But given that neither were happy with Mendes’ production and both actively took steps to ensuring it would be superseded in memory, it is not completely implausible.
 Overarchingly, as much as Riedel’s writing may benefit FROM insider sources, it is said he does not write in benefit OF them. For instance, although friends with Scott Rudin in 2004, an animated (nay threatening) warning from Mr Rudin asking Riedel to “back off” from “slamming” his show, Caroline or Change, seemingly “had no impact”.
That’s not to cite total impartiality or exemption from personal connections and higher up influences colouring his reports of shows. Theatre publicist John Barlow would describe that sometimes “if you ask Michael to kill [one of his pieces], he will, if it’s someone with whom he does business”.
But it would be remiss not to mention that his influences and sources stretch beyond just the big wigs. Amongst his other informants too are the more lowly, overlooked folk like “the stagehands, the ushers, chorus kids, house managers, and press agents… the guys who build sets in the Bronx”. Basically, for anyone who’ll talk, Riedel will listen.
“Michael Riedel doesn't work for the producers or the publicists; he works for the reader,” one publicist said. “Sometimes we're glad of that, sometimes we're not-but at the end of the day, that's the reality.”
Sometimes he’s nice, sometimes he’s not – but the world goes round.
Through all that’s been explored, it should be stated how painful and injurious it must be for individual performers or shows to fall upon the unmitigated, maiming force of being on the wrong side of Riedel’s favour. The way he approached coverage on Bernadette is deplorable from an emotional and personal standpoint. Some would argue that it was too far and crossed a line and was most definitely unfair. Others would say it was justified. It’s hard not to sound petulant as the former, or heartless as the latter.
While his actions may indeed be abrasively wounding in isolated (often plentiful) cases, it’s unreasonable to say Riedel’s intentions would be to cripple the Broadway industry as a whole. There are those who purport that Riedel in fact “keeps Broadway alive with his controversies”. His words may not always be ‘nice’ but it’s difficult to argue they're not engaging.
Many are quick to criticize or react impassionedly to him and his columns; but few are quick to stop reading them. And Riedel “knows that the most important thing is being well read”.
Hence it is understandable why Riedel is appraised as “the columnist Broadway loves to hate”. Through his enthralling and stimulating bag of linguistic and dramatic tricks, Riedel knows how to keep the readers coming back. “He’s lively, and he makes the theater seem like an interesting place,” one producer did reason.
“There are times when no one's going to care about Broadway if you don't have a gossip angle that focuses on the backstage drama,” opined George Rush, the Daily News gossip columnist who was once Riedel's boss.
Perhaps it is logically and principally then, if somewhat cynically, a matter of believing “it's just business” and knowing how to “play the game”.
As Riedel himself would rationalise, “It’s all an act. You gotta have a gimmick, as they say in Gypsy.”
It may not be pleasant, but in a world increasingly dependent on sensationalistic and clickbait-driven engagement, it’s probably not going to change any time soon.
 Well then, if he can live with the toll of the position of moral tumult his column puts him in, so be it.
That he described his mind as being “constantly on the next deadline”, saying “I always think about the column”, and likening writing it to “standing under a windmill”, where “you dodge one blade, but there's always another one coming right behind it”, may be some indication that he can't. At least not wholly easily.
I’ll leave that to him to figure out. Off the record.
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little-mad · 4 years ago
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Downsides of Thievery Pt. 3
~ Previous Part ~ Next Part ~
Going through the portal from one dimension to another felt as simple as walking through a door. There was no flash of light, no weird tingly sensation all over Gavin’s body, no “welcome to a new dimension” announcement; Gavin could almost believe he was still back home...were it not for the fact that every single thing around him was mega sized.
Trees as tall as skyscrapers loomed overhead, and although he was looking down on them from Rael’s hip height, Gavin could still tell that even the wildflowers sticking out of the ground would be taller than him. He swore he even saw a chipmunk the size of a car scurrying up the side of a tree.
Suddenly, Gavin felt almost glad he was secured inside a cage. As much as he hated being confined, right now he didn’t feel like he could handle being out in the open, not with a bunch of big ass woodland creatures roaming about. Being attached to a big ass dude was bad enough.
Though he couldn’t see it from his current position, Gavin figured the portal they’d come through must have gone away, judging by the abrupt disappearance of the soft blue glow that the portal had been giving off a moment ago. “I’m officially closed off from the rest of humanity,” Gavin’s brain helpfully reminded him.
Glancing upward, Gavin caught Rael throwing him a brief look as if to ensure his captive was still there. The teal eyes examined him for only a moment before they returned to looking forward.
Gavin sighed. As intimidating as Rael was, he knew he couldn’t avoid talking to the guy forever. For one, he needed to ask his captor where exactly he was being taken, because in the middle of the woods hadn’t been what he’d been expecting. Gavin was admittedly not all that knowledgeable about alteon customs, but he was pretty sure they mostly lived in cities and towns.
Before Gavin even got the chance to mentally prepare himself for the prospect of addressing the alteon, he was bucked forward by the movement of the giant leg behind him.
Once again lying at the bottom of the cage, Gavin groaned. He was really beginning to sympathize with hamsters, lizards, and other handheld pets. Getting tossed around in a cage really sucked. Although, he figured most pets would be handled more carefully by their owners than Rael was currently handling him.
Every other step the aleton took jarred Gavin’s cage, meaning there was zero point in trying to stand up because he’d just be thrown to the floor again in an instant. Instead, he opted for sitting in the back with his arms wrapped around the iron bars for stability. It was still an unpleasant experience, but at least this way he could spare himself a few extra aches and pains.
About five minutes passed by and Rael continued to make his way silently through the forest. He clearly had no intention of striking up a conversation, which meant the task fell on Gavin. “Just picture him in his underwear,” he thought to himself, but then quickly realized that trick only worked on normal sized people. Picturing Rael in his underwear would only make Gavin feel both afraid and uncomfortable. “Okay…just imagine he’s not gigantic then.”
Gavin tilted his head back so he was looking up towards Rael’s face, however from the angle he was at, he could only really see the underside of the man’s jaw. “Yeeeah, kind of hard to imagine he’s not huge when I have to almost break my neck just to see his face.” After taking a deep, steadying breath, Gavin opened his mouth to speak.
-
Were Rael someone well learned in the magical arts, he could have easily teleported both himself and his human charge to the palace. However, as things were, he had no choice but to travel on foot through the woods that surrounded the city of Ostrad.
Rael didn’t necessarily mind a little hiking, but having to walk back to the city added on about an extra hour to the assignment he never wanted in the first place. He blew out an inaudible sigh, ignoring the way the cage hooked onto his belt repeatedly bumped against his thigh as he walked. At least the human had kept quiet so far, as long as it remained that way--
“Hey, uh--Rael?” The unexpected sound of the human’s voice nearly caused Rael to stop in his tracks. He paused for a moment but quickly recovered and continued making his way forward.
Rael flicked his eyes downwards for just a moment and saw that the human was looking up at him expectantly. Half because he didn’t want to end up running into anything, and half because he didn’t want to give the human the satisfaction of getting his attention, Rael quickly went back to looking forward. “What is it?” he responded reluctantly, making no effort to hide his irritation.
“Well--um, I was just wondering where we’re headed,” said the human nervously. Rael had been a little surprised when he found out that humans didn’t have high, squeaky little voices that fit their size. Instead, their voices were essentially normal, though much quieter than that of an alteon. This was something Rael was grateful for. While it would have been briefly amusing if the humans squeaked like mice, Rael had no doubt he would quickly tire of it.
“I’m delivering you to the Emperor at the palace,” Rael stated tersely. Surely the human could have deduced that on his own.
There was a pause, and Rael hoped that would be the end of the discussion, but evidently the human had other plans. “Right but uh--why didn’t we just...portal straight there?” he asked.
Rael rolled his eyes. He didn’t know whether it was all humans or just this one in particular, but there was certainly an air of obliviousness emanating from Gavin Stone. “The portal needs to be distant enough from civilization in the event intruders manage to slip through somehow,” Rael explained slowly, as though he were speaking to a child.
Honestly, the precaution of keeping portals isolated seemed as though it was more for the sake of protecting the humans that might come through than any alteons. Prior to departing for this assignment, Rael had been educated in all the ways humans could potentially bring harm to alteons. The list was quite short, and mostly involved large weapons of mass destruction, which were apparently not widely available in the human realm.
A thoughtful hum came from the caged human. “I guess that makes sense, though I can’t imagine any human intentionally trying to come here,” he commented. He seemed to be gaining some confidence in his speech and no longer stumbled over his words, much to Rael’s annoyance. The last thing he needed was for his captive to start getting talkative.
“Believe me, we don’t want humans here either,” Rael retorted. Perhaps he was speaking from his own opinion more so than that of the general population of his dimension, but he wasn’t about to tell Gavin Stone that.
-
Gavin narrowed his eyes at Rael’s comment. If he didn’t know any better, he might say that his captor wasn’t all too fond of humans. He had to wonder what the alteon’s past experience with humans had been. Was Gavin the first he’d met? Had he really made that bad of a first impression? “Oh yeah, I sprinted away from him full speed,” Gavin reminded himself.
People not liking him was not an unfamiliar thing for Gavin. Admittedly, he maybe didn’t have the best verbal filter, and had the unfortunate tendency to blurt out whatever popped into his head. He had been fired from his first job at a movie theater for accidentally calling his manager a “lazy dickwad” within said manager’s earshot. He had gotten sent to the principal’s office in third grade for letting it slip to another kid that Santa wasn’t real. And Gavin knew it was only a matter of time before he said something to Rael that really pissed off the giant.
If Gavin were smart, he would just keep his mouth shut. It was obviously what Rael would have preferred. The only problem was, Gavin wasn’t smart. Smart people became doctors, settled down with a sweet spouse, and moved into a fancy house in the suburbs. Smart people did not become thieves who stole from literal giants.
“So uh--are you like the Emperor’s delivery guy then?” Gavin asked. He didn’t really know where he was hoping the conversation would go or what he hoped to accomplish, but running his mouth felt familiar. If he stayed quiet he’d just end up wallowing in his own anxiety and fear.
Rael shot Gavin a quick, sharp look. “I am a member of the Imperial Guard, not a ‘delivery guy’,” he snipped, clearly not fond of Gavin’s insinuation.
Gavin didn’t really know what being in the “Imperial Guard” entailed, though he supposed it had a fancy enough name. Honestly, it kind of sounded like something out of Star Wars, though he wasn’t going to mention that to Rael considering the guy probably didn’t even know what a movie was.
“So did they specially choose--” Gavin’s sentence was interrupted midway through by an annoyed huff from Rael.
“There is no need for us to converse. So unless you have something crucial to say, I recommend you keep quiet,” the alteon stated coldly.
Despite Rael’s less than friendly tone, and the fact that it was a colossus of a man saying it, Gavin did not intend on keeping quiet. A familiar desire to be contrary was rising up in him. His mom had always called it his “urge to be a complete pain in the ass.”
Gavin didn’t necessarily want to intentionally piss off his captor, he didn’t want to make an enemy of the alteon. That would be stupid even for him. However, Gavin wasn’t about to roll over and behave like a good little boy. He was a criminal, following the rules was basically the antithesis of who he was. No, Gavin was going to talk to Rael whether the elf looking son of a bitch liked it or not.
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actlikeyoudidntdoit · 4 years ago
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ASSASSIN’S MODERN DAY PROFESSIONS
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ALTAÏR
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College Professor
-We all know that Altaïr has spent most of his life teaching, so what better job does he have than a college professor?
-He knows what he’s talking about, that much is certain, but sometimes he gets a little too lost in his lesson to realize that his students are scratching their heads. So it’s normal to have students staying after class, but they leave understanding every word of what he said.
-He’s not the fun teacher, but he’ll be able to teach you what you need and still remember it at the end of the day.
-He’s pretty lenient, and even with the obnoxious students who cause a scene, he calmly gets them to at least do their work.
-Other teachers always use him as a reference when it comes to the perfect teacher.
EZIO AUDITORE
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-I can see Ezio being a public speaker since he’s not all that scared of crowds and spends a lot of time giving advice, so I think he’d really enjoy being able to help a crowd of people whose lives are falling apart
-Ezio would be the single anchor in a sea of storms because he always seems to have an answer for everything. He’s a man whose words are turned into inspirational quotes that people hang on their walls.
-When he says that things will be okay, no one doubts him since they know that he lost his father and his brothers very early on and that it took years for Ezio to accept the loss the way he had. If he could soldier through it, why couldn’t they?
-He doesn’t involve himself in politics, finding them to be a waste of time and breath despite how many people ask for his input on the political status of the country he’s staying in.
-He speaks to a lot of people in private, letting them speak their minds and giving his advice if they want it. He’s a therapist without a license, and you always feel hopeful about life leaving his office.
Connor
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Construction or Sports
-This boy was designed for heavy work, and I’ve heard some good points in saying that not only would he be amazing at sports, but he’d also really enjoy it too.
-In my personal headcanon, I think he’d be a good construction worker as well. Not the high end kind that build skyscrapers or anything, but I can see him building simple houses for small communities, taking the lower jobs that can’t afford much help like the sweetheart he is. He definitely volunteers to make houses for the homeless.
-Since most of the homeless he helps don’t have much money, he makes sure to offer them baked goods because he’s definitely a baker.
Edward Kenway
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-As a young man, he joins the navy
-Once he’s on his own, he buys his own boat and treats it like royalty.
-He’s not a pirate himself, but he does let less legal people on board for a price. At the time, it was just an easy cash pay since people paid good money when they were desperate.
-When he’s older and gets a grip on some of the people he’s helping (like the REALLY bad criminals) he quickly lets it go.
-Yet after seeing some of the more decent people and the places they were running from, I can see him being a sort of smuggler, but instead of smuggling drugs or weapons, he sells medicines, canned foods, and clothes to the regions where they’re scarce or hard to pay for.
-When he’s older and found a fortune over time, he starts up his own official charity, hiring various sailers to sail supplies to more places than he himself could alone.
SHAY CORMAC
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-Okay, I have to say it. Shay would DEFINITELY be an FBI spy. Maybe I haven’t thought of it as heavily as I could, but he just strikes me as a man who could kill someone in plain sight and still not be seen.
-He already knows everything he can about infiltrating and getting vital information
-He knows exactly how to manipulate people to get what he wants.
-He’s like Macgyver but as an agent.
-He does things that make sleeping at night impossible, but he tells himself that every long night for him is another person somewhere else having a peaceful night, and peaceful nights means he’s doing his job. Right?
-Constantly questions his morals, but he can’t bring himself to stop, not knowing that he’d do if he stopped, because at least here he’s doing something. He’s contributing.
-That and maybe I might or might not want to see Shay in a suit 🤷‍♀️
AVELINE
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-Actress. And a damn good one. She’s one of the kind of people who get paid millions each job and gives most of her cash on people who really need it. Not only that, she’s a fan favorite everywhere.
-She takes extra jobs in smaller businesses barely staying afloat, and public morality boosts has nothing to do with it. In fact, she keeps her fame life out of everything, choosing to see it just as another job.
-I can see her sharing similarities of Zendaya or Zoe Zaldana
ARNO DORIAN
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-High school teacher or actor, I can’t decide.
-Because let’s be honest, this guys brain is more wrinkled than a raisin. He knows his stuff.
-He’s good at simplifying what he’s saying, and that happens to be a very useful trait when it comes to teaching.
-If he was a teacher, he’d be a damn good one, that’s for sure. No one will fail his class because he’s so good at explaining things, and he’d be the one who actually cares for his students.
-When it comes to acting... just admit that Arno’s a theater boy through and through. If you need proof, he’s the only one with a crazy amount of fancy robes and colors. FOR GODS SAKE HE OWNS A THEATER! So on modern day, I could totally see him as an actor as well.
-He’d be the Ewan Mcgregor of the modern day, because everyone recognizes him from SOMEWHERE because he’s really tested his acting ability on multiple various roles. Well read, charming, and level headed, he’d totally rock being an actor. He’s good friends with Aveline, and when they both have time in their busy schedules, they stop by for coffee and fill each other in on their life.
JACOB
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-Boxing
-I saw the photoshops of Jacob in boxer life, and I have not been the same because oh my god that is amazing.
-but absolutely he’d be a boxer. He’s the shortest guy in the entire match, but he doesn’t need a stool to knock you on your ass before you can laugh about it.
-His opponents are lucky shattering bones is against the rules because he knows how to make someone wish their dad wore a condom.
-A lot of people think that his rounds must be rigged, and his sister had to physically hold him back every time Jacob threatened to give him a close up of how ‘rigged’ his fights were.
-Jacobs a powder keg, so it doesn’t take much to make him explode, and a lot of the less respectful people he has to fight picks particularly sore spots to do just that.
-He might be pissed, but his punch isn’t the only thing that stings. He knows exactly what words to use, and when they’ve gone too far, he doesn’t hold back.
-Might have a temper, but he has a good heart despite it all. He visits schools and completely turns his personality around with kids. He signs autographs, takes pictures, and makes sure that every one of them have a fun day because he knows that there’s some kids in this school that don’t have those kinds of days. He pays the school for field days each time, making sure they all get out. They bring out the scooters, parachutes, capture the flag, and ‘wrestling’ matches for the kids who want to face him. He loses every time. He never has a bigger smile on his face than when he has children fans walk up to him.
EVIE
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-She is totally a lawyer and you can’t change my mind.
-Logic and Facts are her strongest weapons, and so far she has yet to lose a debate.
-Every other lawyer knows that seeing Evie walk into court is an instant death sentence, because like her brother, her words are sharp as a knife and her mind is even sharper.
-If they didn’t look identical, no one would believe that she would be related with Jacob the hot headed boxer, because she was level as water and was near impossible to make angry, but god help the poor sod that presses her.
-Her clients almost always get the best case scenario with Evie by their side by how good she is.
-Also like her brother, children are her weak spot, and her hard composure melts whenever she needs to speak to a child in the witness post, making sure that the child feel comfortable unlike the others that drill the kid with questions when they’re too skittish to answer. She takes her time and gets the kid feeling safe, and gently asks their side.
-Evie might not do it as a profession, but Evie has beaten Jacob in the boxing ring in the gym. She knows damn well how to handle herself, knowing she’d need it since she’d be fighting corrupt politicians or gang members who have too often tried attempts at her life. Every time she emerged unscathed, using the attempt at even more evidence against them and insuring a spot in jail. No one dared try attacking her again after that.
BAYEK
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-I’m thinking police officer or motivational speaker for trauma.
-Either way, he’s a guardian who takes care of the people he’s in charge of. He knows words well, and having been down the dark path himself, he knows exactly what people experience and what they want to hear.
-Be the change you want to see in the world, and that’s exactly what he’s doing.
-He’d be a well respected officer, and he’s not afraid of telling off a comrade if someone is wrongfully accused. He’s not very popular in the police station, but as long as he’s doing his job, he’s satisfied.
-He’s saved several people over the course in his life, and his word is well honored since he’s on no ones side. He sees things as what they are and doesn’t twist events he disagreed with to his point of view. Even if it hurts him personally, he doesn’t lie.
-He’s divorced, but they’re still best friends with each other and visit when they can.
AYA (ran out of gifs. Sorry)
-She is hands down a self defense teacher for women
-She sells hidden self defense tools for less than ten dollars, always sure to keep constantly supply of them since many have confessed that they’ve saved them from dangerous situations.
-Like her former husband, she’s a protector and makes sure she provides her students with the best.
-She teaches children what to do if they ever get grabbed, and she’s had many parents in years thanking her when that information ended up saving their child’s life.
ALEXIOS
-Hands down he is a stunt double
- Preferably Arno’s since he relies more on flexibility than brute strength. Then there’s the fact that they look similar enough in features
-He does the moves that would probably be safer if they were just CGI, but he hates those computers with a passion, preferring to do the real thing instead of giving out something fake. He’s broken more bones than he can count, and the companies he works with always have a medic on standby when something goes wrong.
-They tried convincing him that they only needed him for a few spots, but after realizing that he wanted this (and him assuring them that he doesn’t bother with suing), they let him do his thing. The results are fruitful since the most nitpicky movie fans are absolutely thrilled when there’s a particular move done right.
-He teaches Arno a good few things about how to do action scenes, and they’re definitely good friends.
KASSANDRA
-Roller Derby
-She lives for throwing people and smacking them without being judged for it, so the Derby’s her safe spot.
-Everyone on the opposing team is terrified of her, always scared when they see her devilish smile, knowing that they’re about to get their asses handed to them. Like her brother, she’s an adrenaline junky, and when she’s not doing the derby, she’s going off into car races in a water trench. She’s surprisingly very good with cars too, knowing the inside and out of a car like the back of her hand.
-She loves it when men try to catcall her. It gives her a perfect opportunity to punch them in the face.
-She loves the races themselves because no one expects it. Sometimes she pretends to act like a beginner and absolutely slaughter them, giving them a nice wink before driving out with her cash.
-Only has a soft spot for the girl who visits her on weekends. She’s practically her older sister, and there will be hell to pay if her favorite kid gets hurt in any way.
EIVOR
-BACA(Bikers Against Child Abuse)
-The moment I saw this, I instantly thought about them.
-they would absolutely be a part of this
-Looking all badass in leather while turning into a softie for children? That’s Eivors entire character right there.
-Eivors not afraid to get physical with an abuser. They’d beat the abuser to a pulp and right after take the child out for ice cream.
-No one messes with Eivor, knowing that their lenience was stretched only for children. Anyone else tried to pressure her? Your teeth would be shattered and they’d wear the bits for a necklace.
-Children are much more brave around them because they’re tougher than their parent and on their side, so they’re not afraid to give them to the police
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1ddiscourseoftheday · 4 years ago
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🚨Thurs 17 Dec ‘20🚨
No one will argue, this year has been the worst and I'm not really into that whole 'silver linings to bad things' bit, but... BUT! If the demise of live shows and rise of livestreams meant Zayn deciding to perform for us?! Well. I would be willing to reconsider my whole ass philosophy on life! Unfortunately, despite the excitement (or was it hysteria?) he inspired last night by getting all our hopes up, it might just be a music video? We'll see though. He definitely did register a new song, UNFXWITABLE (!), and then, and THEN: slid a single photo into his instagram story, a truly beautiful old baroque theater stage, fitted with live show speakers and a tantalizingly closed red curtain. The stage lights are on, the seats are empty... prepping for zomething?? It was discovered to be the St George Theater in Staten Island, very exciting, but today more video of them working on whatever they're working on surfaced (a snippet at the theater with a bit of an unknown song audible) that makes it seem more likely they're working on a music video than a livestream set up. Still, we can DREAM. At the very least we're getting a new song any minute now and at best-- Z3 and a video AND a liveztream?? (or prerecorded, that's FINE.) The pap pics the other day were him leaving a menswear boutique (sorry I said home, my bad, it was the usual 'front door to car' walk though) leading to speculation he was getting fitted for zomething zpecial... maybe we'll get to see it soon!
Likely on account of the added European show tickets going on sale today, Louis came online to check in, and also to laugh at old videos of himself, send larries into a tailspin, and best of all, weigh in on and shut down discourse left and right THANK YOU SIR! Louis is happy to walk us all through how not to get Live In London video taken down (“do it on a burner account haha?” tips from the master truly, no one would know better so listen to him); he denies having such an account himself (“maybe I should”) though unlike Liam (see below) HE doesn't go that extra step into obvious lie territory and say he's NEVER had one. On how he deals with comments about his height (which are up again these last few days due to a video circulating that uses math to conclude once again that he is in fact, as documented, 5'9”), “I rise above them,” he zings back, and in appreciation of someone who actually got the joke, “you're on my level,” DOUBLE PUNNING, BOOM but that's not all: he finishes off with the comment that finished ME off, “such a peculiar debate.” REALLY. Peculiar specifically, not like strange or weird or annoying you just... went right in for the Eroda copyrighted word huh. OKAY. Also: no, probably no collabs on LT2 (“doubt it”), yes he loves twitter “in doses, no better way to talk to you lot” (you mean even better than via t shirts?? sounds fake but okay), tells us he is “100% for sure” is gonna get the vaccine, and that “cucumber is shit” which isn't really a discourse we needed him to solve that I knew of but like, okay! Sorted! Antis seethed about him talking to larries and larry UAs and picking a video of him and H singing You and I to reply to, and probably cucumber enthusiasts and anti-vaxxers were unhappy too, but the rest of us? WINNING.
Liam is all over, first appearing in a fisherman's cap that nicely sets of his full and fluffy beard, then demonstrating answering questions for the Naughty List insta filter. He says he has never made a fake social media account, so I guess he's not lurking here reading these or I would guess that if I believed THAT for one second, he also says yes I have lied to my best friend so I'll just chose to believe he means us by 'best friend' since here he is, lying away. Dixie is absent from the recent promo, which is a blessing not just because they don't mesh particularly well but also because she's gotten even more terrible on main, moving from simply allying herself with racists to producing her own racist content- if we're lucky she'll simply fade away along with xmas and we can move on without any of that thank you very much. Liam is still a good BFF to us though: today he's offering himself up as prize in a raffle, you can enter to win a 'once in a lifetime VIP Experience in 2021 with Liam' for a low low £5, funds going to Stagehand's #ILoveLive campaign to support industry workers. And on the 17th day of christmas, my LP Advent Alarm woke me up with... Roman Kemp leading us through a weirdly peppy breathing exercise, backed with both soothing spa music and a sample of Liam's voice taken from the sleep story played over and over at near random intervals! I said it before and I'll say it again, they REALLY should have recorded all the material at once last month, but tbh I am enjoying the chaotic daily scramble to find something to put on the thing that's come of them being caught short maybe even more than I would normal content, it's getting downright experimental and I'm fully here for it. It's got that classic janky af for no reason 1D feel you know!
Rob Sheffield found better things to say about Watermelon Sugar, naming it his number one song of 2020 and calling it “a lost Stevie Nicks/ Stevie Wonder duet” plus gifting us a Harry quote: “that one we reworked a bunch of times, and it died a couple times, then it just kept coming back. We fully killed it a few times, but it kept coming back in. So I thought, There’s a reason it’s surviving.” And Chris Pine- who also says that he's all done shooting his part of Don't Worry Darling- said, “Harry Styles is an absolute delight. He's one of the most professional people I've ever met. Couldn't be kinder, more gracious, I mean, really, I was stunned by this kid. He's off-the-charts cool.”
And finally, as 2020 draws to a close we are being flooded with a barrage of our guys being declared winners of incredibly narrow categories (Harry on a list of 'groundbreaking magazine covers' for example), but I think the winner of MY list of 'Highly Specific Accolades' is sewn up for the year already; Heartbreak Weather is officially “the first [advertising] campaign to utilize weather-tracking technology to target content to users”! I'll definitely be keeping my eye out for competitors but beating that for reaching for a category will be TOUGH.
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myhauntedsalem · 3 years ago
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Hotel Chelsea
“A lot of funky things happen in the Chelsea.”
~Janis Joplin
There are many famous ghosts associated with the Hotel Chelsea located in the State of New York. While this hotel is officially referred to as the “Hotel Chelsea”, there are many that refer to it as the "Chelsea Hotel” or simply “the Chelsea”. According to locals, this hotel is considered to be one of the most haunted places in New York. This hotel is considered to be one of the most historic landmarks within the City of New York City and has received a great deal of its overall popularity due to the fact that many famous individuals have resided within the structure.
In order to appreciate the famous ghosts that are said to be a part of the Hotel Chelsea, it is important to understand a bit about the history of the location. It has been established that the structure was constructed between the years of 1883 and 1884. In the year of 1884, guests were permitted to occupy the rooms of the new establishment. The building consisted of twelve stories and was created using beautiful red bricks. The architecture was a collaboration of the style referred to as “Queen Anne Revival” as well as “Victorian Gothic”. The firm that designed the building was one called “Hubert, Pirsson & Company”. There are many aspects of the New York City hotel that make it quite distinctive. Examples include iron balconies and a magnificent grand staircase that goes all the way up to the twelfth floor.
When the Hotel Chelsea was constructed, it gained popularity as being the single tallest structure in the entire State of New York. Despite this level of popularity, it did not take long for the hotel to experience financial complications and close its doors to guests due to bankruptcy. These financial issues were a direct result of the economic problems of the time and the fact that the local theaters moved to other areas away from the hotel. However, it was reopened for business in the year of 1905 under new ownership. Just a little over a couple of decades later, the hotel experienced bankruptcy a second time. Three individuals elected to purchase the establishment in the year of 1939. Their names were Julius Krauss, David Bard, and Joseph Gross. The new owners retained authority over the building until the early part of the 1970s when all three died and the building was then officially left to a man by the name of Stanley Bard, who was the son of deceased owner, David Bard. This ownership became interrupted in the year 2007 when the other previous owner’s relatives took over and allowed a management firm to take over. However, according to sources, this firm no longer has responsibility over the supposed haunted hotel.
While it is true that there have been many owners that have come and gone throughout the lifetime of the structure, there seems to be a reason for the deceased to stay – even though it is time for them to pass from the physical world to the spiritual world. Many individuals have resided within the popular hotel throughout history – several of them have been quite notable. This type of popularity could be why there are rumored to be so many famous ghosts. It could also be why the hotel is considered to be one of the most haunted places in New York. There are many different famous people that have resided at the Hotel Chelsea. Examples of these individuals include Mark Twain, Arthur Miller, Tennessee Williams, Dylan Thomas, Madonna, and several others. The following lists others that have lived at or at least visited this haunted hotel throughout history:
• Janis Joplin
• Alice Cooper
• Patti Smith
• Jimi Hendrix
• Peter Walker
• Sid Vicious
• Robert Crumb
• Jasper Johns
• Charles James
• Ruth Harkness
When evaluating the haunted places in New York and several other states, you will find that there is nearly always some type of death that occurs at what paranormal investigators consider to be a “Hot Spot”. The same holds true for the Hotel Chelsea. Many believe that the famous ghosts that haunt the location have a lot to do with the deaths that have occurred in and/or around the establishment. While none of the deaths seem to be related, there definitely seems to be a black cloud lingering above this particular New York City hotel. The individuals that have been gripped by this dark cloud seem to portray it best. At one point, Sid Vicious told the Associated Press that the Chelsea Hotel “…is a vortex – an artistic tornado of death and destruction and love and broken dreams”.
One of the most popular deaths involved a woman by the name of Nancy Spungen. In life, she was the girlfriend of the bassist of the group known as the “Sex Pistols”, Sid Vicious. Nancy left home when she was seventeen years old. She immediately moved to New York City and acquired a job as a stripper. It is said that she enjoyed following certain bands around such as Aerosmith and The Ramones. In the year of 1977, she relocated to London and met the lead singer of the Sex Pistols. Despite the fact that she showed an interest in the lead singer of the band named Johnny Rotten, he did not return the affection. When she realized that he was not interested, she began showing an interest in Sid Vicious. Soon, they developed a relationship and even moved into the same home.
During the relationship, both she and Sid experimented with many different drugs. It was during this time that the Ghosts of the Hotel Chelseapress dubbed her as “Nauseating Nancy” because she would often show signs of verbal and physical abuse in public, without regard for others. The Sex Pistols officially broke apart in the year of 1978 and she and Sid moved to the Hotel Chelsea. It is said that the couple resided in room 100 under different names than they were known for in public. It has been said that the couple continued to delve deeper into drugs and that there were many heated arguments between the two. On the 12th day of October in the year of 1978, Nancy was discovered dead in the bathroom floor of the room at the Hotel Chelsea and Sid was arrested for the murder. He got released and was awaiting trial when he took his last hit of heroin and died. Many believe that some of the famous ghosts at this hotel are that of Nancy Spungen and Sid Vicious.
The next death that is considered to be quite popular when it comes to the Hotel Chelsea is that of the poet and writer named Dylan Marlais Thomas that occurred many years earlier than Nancy’s on the 9th day of November in the year of 1953. In October of 1953, Mr. Thomas arrived in the State of New York and according to those around him; he had a wealth of medical problems. Many claim that he had suffered from regular blackouts and even suffered from medical conditions associated with his heart. In addition to these issues, he also had to carry an inhaler because of the fact that he suffered from respiratory conditions. In addition to the medical complications that he suffered from, it was said that he also suffered from alcoholism.
Many individuals claim that Dylan Thomas died of alcohol poisoning, but there was a doctor that visited him several times right before his death. Based on reports from doctors, it was established that he was suffering from bronchitis, pneumonia, and a relatively high white blood cell count. Since his death, he has apparently joined the ranks of the famous ghosts that are said to haunt the Hotel Chelsea. Many people claim that they have seen his face on numerous occasions – especially around the room identified as “206”, where he passed away. There are many famous ghosts associated with this hotel. This is one reason it is considered to be one of the most haunted places in New York.
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silver-starlight-99 · 3 years ago
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Monsters at Work:  The Jokester Generation  Part Four: Steps to an Uncertain Future
Be prepared for one doozy of an info-dump
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One of the proudest moments of Tylor Benjamin Tuskmon’s life was the day he graduated Scarer Cum Laude from Monsters University.  It was a hallmark moment for the entire Tuskmon family in fact; as he was the first in his familial line to graduate from college.  Bernard and Millie Tuskmon couldn’t have been prouder of their son, and both were more than happy to share that act.  From as young as five years old, little Tylor was awestruck by the Scarers of Monsters Inc., I imagine like many Monster children his age.  But it wasn’t until the fourth grade that he made the decision to become a full-fledged Scarer once he came of age. 
The boy was a natural talent, with his height and horns giving him quite the intimidating profile.  But much like a certain green, one-eyed monster, Tylor wasn’t afraid to study like mad to perfect his skills, and made a hobby of collecting/memorizing every Scarer Card he could get his claws on.  His parents, despite coming from more of a lower middle-class background, wanted to do everything they could to support their child when they saw the dedication he was putting into his dream-career.  Bernard worked long nights at his family’s hardware store for years, and Millie even pawned off a number of family heirlooms, just to make enough to put their boy through college once the time came.  Add on the special scholarship he received from one of the most prestigious Scaring Schools in the country, and it looked like everyone’s hard work paid off after all.  Sure, that kind of laser-focussed dedication meant he wasn’t as sociable as most his age, but it was worth it if it meant being that much closer to his childhood dream. 
Besides his graduation, the last time Tylor had this much attention on him was during the party hosted by Dean Knight in celebration of him breaking an old MU Scaring record as a part of his final exam.  Beating even James P. Sullivan’s numbers on the Simulation Room, recorded from the monster’s time during the Scare Games. A fact that made its way across the school campus in record time, reaching the ears of a certain brother duo working in MU’s theater department.  They were both friends with the infamous college dropout, and thought he’d be interested to hear his old title was being taken over by this new blood.   
Even if he couldn’t remember the names of most of the people in attendance, despite having been in classes with them for years, Tylor couldn’t have been prouder, knowing all that hard work had been worth it.  Especially so because before leaving the party, his teacher, Professor Shade, pulled him aside to tell him he’d received a letter of recommendation from Monsters Incorporated.  Despite the controversies surrounding the company since the event deemed The Waternoose Scandal, Monsters Inc. was still considered one of the premiere energy factories in the country.  And, looking at the young monster’s impressive list of accomplishments, the Board of Directors wanted to accept him as soon as possible.    
This was everything Tylor Tuskman could’ve wanted.  The chance to live his dream, make his family proud, and make his mark on the world of Scaring.  He thought that after he graduated from college, it would be nothing but smooth sailings.  Little did poor Tylor realize, he would make an astronomical impact on not just the Scaring world, but the Monster world as a whole.  Just… not in the way he expected.  And he had one of his former childhood heroes to thank for that.   
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Most monsters would agree that everything began to change the morning The Waternoose Scandal was released to the public.  Some would argue that it was the initial sighting of the Tiny Terror of Monstropolis at the now famous restaurant Harryhausen’s that got the ball rolling.  Others say that the panic stirred by the escaped child was merely the spark that would ignite the true bonfire that would come to consume the city. 
Tylor Tuskmon was just a bit too young to remember much of the hysteria itself.  The almost two-year-old spent most of the time after the initial sighting held up in his family’s hardware store.  While Bernard worked to keep his family safe and provide his neighboring Monsters tools they could use to defend themselves, should the dangerous creature be spotted in their neighborhood.  It wasn’t until the next morning when Millie saw a televised announcement from the CDA giving a cautionary all-clear that the Tuskmons felt safe enough to take down the boards on their windows.  They, along with many of their other neighbors, spent much of the day in a state of anxiety, with a confused Tylor trying to comprehend why everyone he knew was being so skittish and weird.  By the following morning, it was announced that the CDA had located and returned the child back to it’s world, and their door was shredded for good measure.  The Tuskmon parents heaved a sigh of relief as it seemed things could go back to normal.  However, it wasn’t until three days later that the official story behind the escape was released to the public, and that initial air of dread would be replaced with something new.  
Henry J. Waternoose Ⅲ, during a city-wide energy crisis, was diluting company funds and manipulating his employees to build a prototype for something he’d hoped would reinvent Scream-power extraction.  While effective, it would put Scarers at a higher risk of contamination because of their closer interactions with human children.  And he was willing to put Monster society on-a-whole in danger by kidnapping thousands of kids in order to maintain his machine’s efficiency.  The Tiny Terror was just the guinea pig to test the prototype.  If all this chaos was the result of a single child escaping his grasp, who knows what would befall Monstropolis if a small army of them were able to revolt from their captors?  If not for the courageous, somewhat fool-hearty, actions of Monsters Incorporated’s top Scaring team, the situation could’ve been much worse.  Thankfully, Mr. Waternoose was quickly apprehended, any known conspirators were questioned, and the CDA would remain vigilant in locating any other associates.  One of which being Randal Boggs, another of Monsters Incorporated’s top Scarers, who seemed to have fled the city while James Sullivan and Mike Wazowski focussed their attention on the true head of operations.
Between the media coverage of the CEO’s trial, dealing with the continuing energy crisis, the protests that arose from Monsters angered by the gross negligence of Waternoose’s Scream Extractor plan, and the lingering anxiety from the initial child sighting, things in Monstropolis would remain… let’s say hectic for a while.  Because of The Waternoose Scandal, Anthropophobia was at an all-time high, especially in Monstropolis, where there were more than enough monsters happy to use that lingering paranoia to their advantage.  You’d be surprised by the amount of small and big-budget movies that were produced in response to the whole affair.  Along with Monstropolis politicians that would use this instance to promote themselves as beacons of safety during election campaigns.  Not to mention the dozens of Monsters who’d use The Waternoose Scandal as a way to sell cheap junk to gullible tourists believing they were purchasing actual weapons used against a human.
Meanwhile, as trust in Monsters Inc. was beginning to dwindle, the same could not be said for the CDA.  Mike and Sully may have received the lion’s share of attention and praise for their efforts, but public approval for the Child Detection Agency had reached new heights for their supposed work in apprehending Waternoose and detaining the dangerous child.  And as long as the heroes of the hour were “willing” to vouch for the good work of Roz and her subordinates, she was willing to overlook certain incriminating details that may have fallen through the cracks as she wrote up her report.
It would be two years since The Waternoose Scandal before the dust would truly settle.  While the fear of Humans would remain in the city, much of the initial mania had long-since died down.  Despite receiving a life sentence in the Monstropolis Maximum Security Prison, the former CEO would pass on due to heart complications just a year into his confinement.  Since then, Monsters Inc’s Board of Directors had appointed new CEO, a squirrely fellow named Hunter Tycroft, who was more than willing to comply with the CDA’s occasional sweeps of the factory in hopes of discovering any lingering documents involving Waternoose’s plans for the Scream-Extractor.
As for Mike and Sully, they would eventually go on to continue their good work as the best Scaring team in the city, even breaking the all-time Scaring record; a dream they’d both shared since their first days on the job.  A young Tylor Tuskman, along with many of his peers, would watch in awe from their televisions as mayor Titus Fangmore himself held a ceremony to congratulate the two for their good work.  But to those who truly knew the duo, their fire, that initial passion for their work that drove them to achieve such records, had been fading ever since Waternoose’s arrest.  They did their part to help with the energy crisis, but between Sully’s bout of depression and Mike’s aggravation over the constant harassment by the press, the two were going through the motions for a while.  But with each other’s support, they would eventually get their heads back in the game, and their normally cheerful personalities would return.  To the general public, it seems like things were finally going back to some sense of normal.   
But trust me, in a few years, the duo idolized as heroes, would soon become the center of a cultural upheaval that would drastically affect both Monsters Incorporated and the Monster world as a whole. 
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By the 10-year anniversary of The Waternoose Scandal, things in Monstropolis had almost returned to normal.  Sure, there would be the occasional conspiracy theorist looking to stir up the populace, something that was becoming easier through the development of technology and social media.  But of course, most Monsters are quick to dismiss the more outlandish stories.  I mean, come on; The CDA blackmailing Mike and Sully into assisting with the capture of a door-hopping child?  It sounds like a fun idea for a movie, but that’s just the kind of speculative fiction Monsters make up to milk whatever nostalgia they can from a big event.  Something like that couldn’t have actually happened and been covered up, right?
Well, whatever the case, Mike and Sully are brought in for an interview on national news to commemorate the anniversary, with many of Monstropolis’ citizens tuning in.  And while some of the two’s answers can’t help but feel a bit… scripted at times, things go smoothly.  That is, until the end, where Mike and Sully decide to make an announcement.  For what feels like the first time since the initial incident, the two choose to be more earnest about their time with the human child.  It’s not enough to technically break the vow of silence they had with the CDA, but it’s enough to talk about one specific experience.
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It happened all at once, so they didn’t think much of it at the time, but there was something about that instance that always stood out to them.  Monsters had always believed it was a child’s screams that powered their world, yet a giggle had enough energy that it could blow out an entire apartment’s worth of appliances?  They only had a few experiences to go by, but Mike and Sully were at least open to exploring Laugh power as an alternative energy source for their world.  After living through, and being forced to work to their limits during an intense power crisis, there was something appealing about Monsters being able to harvest ten times the normal amount of energy from a single kid.  Of course, all of this was just working off of theories, but the Scarers were eager to reach out to others who’d help them test their ideas.  After all, if this was as successful as they believed it could be, this could completely revolutionize the power-production industry.  That is, if the higher-ups within that same industry were willing to accept the possibility of treating children as something other than a toxic battery. 
Yeah, unsurprisingly, a majority of Monster society had… let’s say conflicted opinions about this.  This wasn’t the first time the idea of alternative energies was brought to the general public, it’s not even the first time someone proposed something cleaner, sometimes with no necessity for a human.  But in a world where companies like Monsters Incorporated, Fear Co and Scream Industries have a monopoly on power distribution, they made sure to deter any who posed a threat to their bottom line.  Many of said companies have some sort of tie to major media outlets, so it doesn’t take much to persuade certain news stations to… alter the public perception of certain individuals.  Or just scare the populace into a frenzy akin to the Satanic Panic of the 80’s at the mere mention of alternative energies.  Monsters Bernard and Millie’s age can remember reading news articles in their high-school years about some kind of whack-job cult that believed the blood and teeth of human children could be turned into a reusable fuel, but only if pulled directly from the source.  Of course such rumors were eventually debunked, but their purpose was fulfilled, and most major cities would come to totally rely on Scream energy.  Leaving many of those same monsters who proposed a change to be publicly shamed into reconforming, or unable to build a functioning prototype for their idea because of a lack of funding.    
But things were different for Mike and Sully.  They weren’t some crackpot duo out to corrupt Monster society, these were the heroes of Monstropolis, the tops of their field in Scaring, and practically paraded by the CDA at any needed opportunity.  And now, they’re saying they’re willing to give it all up because of a hunch from an incident over ten years ago?  They’re claiming that the beings that have terrorized Monsterkind for hundreds of years are creatures that should be entertained and not terrified?  Are human children even truly toxic?!
So, like I said, many in the monster world were split on this idea.  Many of the older generation were quick to dismiss Mike and Sully’s idea, usually because of their own self-interests or internalized perceptions of humans.  One thing’s for sure, it hurt Tylor when Barnard insisted they get rid of all his Mike and Sully memorabilias after the interview, the elder Tuskmon believing the Scarers were just trying to reclaim their fame from ten years ago by making up nonsense about children not being toxic.  It was a sentiment shared by many Monster adults, unable to comprehend that such a seemingly obvious fact of their world was being challenged.  For Tylor’s generation however… things get a bit complicated.
Of course, for kids like Tylor who grew up in a time where anthropophobia was on the rise in their formative years, a fear of Humans was ingrained pretty early on.  But at the same time, these were kids that grew up during The Waternoose Scandal.  The seemingly-irrefutable truths of their parents’ era were being questioned, or outright exposed for their corruption.  Even if most Monsters of this younger generation were still brought up to be scared of humans, there was more than enough evidence for them to consider that perhaps alternative forms of energy production were worth looking into.  Not to mention, with the total boom of human-themed horror films that were brought about by the The Waternoose Scandal, just as many human horror film fanatics come to root for the monsters in movies, there were many Monsters that became fascinated with humans because of such productions.  While the Tuskmons may have considered their son to be a relatively good kid, in a fit of rebellion in his teen years, Tylor would occasionally sneak into his local movie theater to catch an age-inappropriate human-based horror movie.
As the young Monster would grow to hone his scaring skills, Mike and Sully were doing what they could to make leeway with their plan to bring Laugh power to Monstropolis, while dealing with the public backlash they were receiving as a result of their announcement.  Sure the younger generation was open to the possibility, but they needed individuals with a little more credibility in the corporate field to build a working prototype.  Not to mention the ever-daunting question of where exactly could they find Monsters that would be willing to be the test-subjects for such a project?  Because of their… complicated background with the folks at the MU Scaring school, Sully didn’t think it wise to turn to them for help.  Having the vocal support of a famous Scarer could’ve helped to give credibility to their idea, but as expected, most weren’t exactly willing to forfeit their Scaring careers or reputations on such an outlandish idea.
In the end, the only people they could get to listen to them were a little-known organization called CETHCA (Creatures for the Ethical Treatment of Humans and Children Alike.)  Because the Monster world’s understanding of human behavior is so warped, this group could best be described as a weird human appreciation club that was managed by extraterrestrials.  Unlike the general public, these individuals are actually curious to learn more about the habits of the human race, and have often tried to advocate for the proper treatment and compensation of children for their screams.  Of course, the media does what they can to paint these people as  attention-seeking wackjobs.  Sully himself even remembers listening to Waternoose complain about a CETHCA protest during his early days as a Scarer, with the CEO painting the lot as a group just a few steps up from an organized cult, with its Monsters so desperate for validation they’d believe any dangerous notions their leaders told them.
But when they finally caught wind of Mike and Sully’s proposal, they decided to pull their resources together to try and boost the public’s support for the idea.  It wasn’t quite the compensation for children they were hoping for, it was the first time in what felt like a long time someone in the energy business seemed to take an interest in showing these creatures some respect.  Like I said, these guys are certainly more sympathetic to humans, but that doesn’t mean they have the experience to be able to see children as beings equal to them in sapience and intelligence.�� While they still didn’t have the most positive reputation in the eyes of the public, CETHCA had slowly received more members as dissatisfaction with Monsters Incorporated’s practices began to grow.  And with the development of social media, what started as an eclectic group of Monsters was soon enough to form a decent following.  And after getting to meet with Mike and Sully themselves, they took to the streets and the internet to spread the word of the power of laughter.
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It had been fifteen years since The Waternoose Scandal.  While their glory years as Monsters Inc’s top Scarers may have been behind them, Mike and Sully remained figues of interest, for better and for worse.  Their advocacy for Laugh power may have gained more legitimacy because of CETHCA’s efforts, but that didn’t mean many of their co-workers were quiet about their discomfort.  If Scarers didn’t have what it took to make children laugh, many would need to be laid off in exchange for those who better fit the bill.  In fact, a lot of Monster culture is based around a Monster’s scariness; for some it’s considered the measure of a true Monster.  There are many businesses outside of Scream production that only exist to try and make a Monster look more threatening.  If Laugh power proved to be more profitable, it meant not just a max layoff of Scarers, but a decline in the world’s economy, one Monsters may not be able to bounce back from.  A few of Monsters Incorporated’s Scarers decided to transfer to other companies, or outright quit to pursue more stable jobs in these unsure times.  If Mike and Sully weren’t doing their best to maintain Monstropolis’ energy levels, the higher ups probably would’ve fired them just to keep the company out of another scandal.
Which made it all the stranger when the two received a message from the Board of Directors.  Beforehand, Monsters Inc. never gave an official statement on whether they were for or against the idea of Laugh power, still just trying to clean up the mess left behind from The Waternoose Scandal.  But suddenly, Mike and Sully received an email stating that the company was interested in experimenting with Laugh power, if only to see for themselves if it was possible to multiply their energy output with just a few tweeks to the typical method.  While skeptical, Sully was just relieved that someone in the higher ups was finally taking their idea seriously, and agreed.  Mike was equally unsure of the Board’s intentions, but decided to use this to his advantage, managing to squeeze out a few work perks and a raise for him and Sully in exchange for his compliance.
From then on came the process of actually building the experimental “Laugh Floor,” and finding the right Monsters that would inevitably become the new faces of Laugh power production, aptly called Jokesters.  Using one of the older Scare floors reserved for members of the occasionally-used night shift, they would begin to build the first Laugh floor.  All that really needed to be modified for the process of energy extraction were the Scream canisters, to adjust to the larger amounts of output produced.  To do so, the Board pulled some strings with their connections at Monsters University, having some of their Scream-Can focussed students earn extra credit by assisting with the prototypes.  What took a bit more work to explain was the request for a simulation dummy that responded with laughter instead of screams.  But hey, as long as MI was willing to be more lenient in accepting their Scaring school students after graduation, the university saw no need to question things further.
With most of the technical stuff sorted out, then came the difficult task of finding the right Jokesters.  In the end, it was decided to be a mix of old Scaring pros to start things off, and then use them to train the fresher faces, as a way to prove that training was accessible to any who were open enough to try.  Mike of course led the charge in Jokester training, working with Ms. Flint to create a step-by-step training guide to eventually be shared with other companies and Scaring schools.  It was here where Mike saw his first recruit, Brian “Phlegm” Bile, a regular in the company’s simulation room who seemed to make a name for himself as the Monster to look to to see what not to do to Scare.  The pratfalls that seemed to keep him from becoming a true Scarer made Phlegm a perfect Jokester candidate.  
The next two actually reached out to Sully.  Scaring legend Carla “Killer Claws” Benitez was interested in the potential of techniques that could produce larger amounts of energy, so she was willing to do her part, even at her older age, to keep the city she loved from having to deal with another energy crisis.  For Rosie “Roaring” Levin, even if it came from a morbid curiosity than anything else, was curious to see how a more human-friendly form of energy-production would work, and so reached out to Sully to see what he had to say.  Lastly, but definitely the most surprising, was Art.  Yup, Mike and Sully’s old Oozma Kappa brother had certainly lived an interesting life since his graduation.  Part of which included joining up with CETHCA, if only to try and broaden his own understanding of the world.  He was actually the one to get the two Scarers connected with the organization.  And now that they were ready to put things in action, he was happy to lend his services as a Jokester.  
Mike included, that totaled to five Jokesters.  An admittedly small number, but something they could hopefully make up for with their extra energy output.  As Sully worked with the mechanical side of putting together the Laugh floor, Mike and Ms. Flint were using trial and error to turn these Scarers into Jokesters, and organizing their findings into a comprehensive manual for future trainees.
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It’s been twenty years since The Waternoose Scandal.  It’s just days away from Tylor Tuskmon’s first day at Monsters Incorporated.  Just a few days before this Scaring pro has his childhood dream turned on his head.  Just two weeks before the city of Monstropolis learns that one of their biggest companies is going through some big managerial changes.  And just a few days before a certain someone makes their official return to the city that changed their life forever.  Will the Monster world be able to survive this inevitable upheaval?  Who knows.  Either way, I suggest you grab a snow cone, you’re gonna want a snack as we wait for this powder keg to go off.   
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By the Gods!  When I started writing these things, I had no idea it was gonna take me this long just to get through my backstory stuff!  Ugh.  Well, it’s finally done.  And you know what?  Back when I did part one, I said I wasn’t planning on turning my ideas into a full-fledged fan-fiction.  Well guess what?  After all the energy I put into this, I’d feel pretty sh*tty if I didn’t bother paying off all the stuff I was building up to.  Yup, looks like I’m writing a fan-fiction for my Monsters at Work au thingy.  Hopefully it shouldn’t take me a whole month before I make another post about this.  But I won’t try to make promises I know I can’t keep.  To the handful of people who bothered to stick around this long, and to read all of my previous rambly-posts, thank you.  And I ask you to stay tuned.  The Jokester Generation is on its way.
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pastelwitchling · 3 years ago
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🚨 PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME YOUR SPECULATIONS/RANTS 🚨
Now, with that out of the way, let’s talk about 3x02.
Oh my gooooods, this episode, guys. This post won’t be nearly as long as last week’s (Edit from future Rin from half an hour later; it is indeed as long as the last one), but there’s quite a bit to unpack here, so let’s get started.
First, Liz. I skipped every single one of her scenes 😂 I am so bored and completely uninterested with her work in LA, and her relationship with Heath. I feel like these past two episodes, and this episode in particular, she really has nothing to do anymore with Roswell. Everyone has some role to play, but she has this whole separate storyline going on somewhere else. She just doesn’t seem to have any integral part of the story this season. So yeah, every time her and Heath came on screen, I just skipped until it was over.
Second. Y’all. I could not bring myself to skip any other scene. Everyone’s storyline was interesting enough to watch, everyone was so fascinating. I even legitimately enjoyed Maria’s scenes! (Save for the one with Michael catching her, but I really enjoyed her reaction to him! I like that they’re giving them their old banter back with none of the “romance”, if that’s what you can even call it.) I really enjoyed everyone’s scenes. There’s such a clear improvement with the writing so far (gee, I wonder what changed), and I really hope the rest of the episodes are as good and even better than this one was.
Max looked so good this episode, his smiles and laughs at the beginning -- MY HEART 😍 I’m so proud of him for having written a manuscript, and maybe it also just makes me really happy because he and I connect so much now 😂 He’s a bookworm who’s written a novel, I’m a bookworm who’s written a novel -- I just love it very much 🙈❤
Hate me all you want, I don’t care, but I thought the Wyatt and Rosa scenes were extremely cute. If the show goes in this direction of truly redeeming Wyatt, I could totally ship them. I really, really enjoyed them, they were very cute to watch. I swear, I had this smile I couldn’t help the whole time like, “Aww!”. Obviously, I want Wyatt to be properly redeemed, I want him to be an actively better person, and I want Rosa to firmly decide that he’s good first, but if they do redeem him, then I’m all for this, I really loved it 🥰💗
Michael is the Dictator’s son?! I’ll tell y’all honestly, I thought Mr. Jones was actually the Dictator, and I was really shocked in the best way. This is how you surprise your audience. Not shock for the sake of shock, but shock that is relevant, that makes sense in the story, that makes people want to keep watching, not stop. What a brilliant turn of events, and you know I had a fic planned the second it happened which will hopefully be coming soon. No promises, but I’ll do my best.
And finally, we get to my Alex. Yeah! Alex is in this! I love how the general consensus has just been shock that he’s in it at all 😂 (Hell of a job, PR team, I can see you’re really on top of things 👍🏻.) I will confess though, I was a little worried about that when I found out, just because we know that Alex has to miss two to three episodes, and I’d hoped to get them out of the way early on, but it’s Alex, so you know, the world’s a better place for it.
Alex is officially Black Widow, and I don’t normally do this, but I 👏🏻 CALLED 👏🏻 THAT 👏🏻 PLOT 👏🏻 LINE 👏🏻. The way the Black Widow movie had inspired me to write about Alex, the way I just envisioned Alex as I was watching in that theater, the number of fics I wanted to write but didn’t because I was done with aus. And then the number of non-au fics I ended up wanting to write instead. Nevertheless, it doesn’t matter because I 🌝 called 🌝 it 🌝. Here is the fic where I called it. I’m very proud of myself for that one, and even prouder of the writers for recognizing what I’d already known since the Black Widow release date.
Words cannot describe Alex’s beauty this season. In the diner, in his cute suit, in that white-tee, the scene when Ramos (who I guessed was the one conducting the psych eval the second I saw him, by the way) opens the door and the lights come back on, the purse of his lips, the way he studied the Lockhart Machine (did anyone else just immediately think of Gilderoy Lockhart when they heard the name?), when he said, “No. I’ll take this one,” like the freaking badass he is?!!! 😍
I really enjoyed this episode. Admittedly, I am worried now that Liz is back since it seems like every time she’s around, they focus too much on social issues as oppose to the actual story going on, but I’m holding out hope for the best. I had a lot of fun, I don’t trust Mr. Jones at all, even less after the way he talked to Isobel. I’m really hoping the writers don’t take the typical route of doubt gnawing away at her and then making her help Jones despite it being the obvious worst thing to do. I’m also a little frustrated malex hasn’t interacted yet, but I’m sure it’s coming, and, according to Vlamis, in a really, really good scene. I’m choosing to keep faith that these writers know what they’re doing.
Gods, could you imagine if these people had been free to work on season 2 without constant interceptions from CAM? How different life would be. Alas, there’s no use lamenting the past. I just know that I’m eager for the story to move forward, and as Alex had been, for the first time in a long time, I’m hopeful.
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route22ny · 4 years ago
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    Politicians and pundits often like to compare the COVID-19 pandemic to a war. Nothing in most of our lifetimes has had the society-changing impact of the COVID-19 pandemic — and this kind of feels like the way that our parents say their parents described the Great Depression or World War II.
    But World War II ended in a singular moment. Treaties were signed and people rushed into the streets in jubilation. The COVID-19 pandemic, which has plagued our lives for the last 14 months, won't end in a singular moment. There'll be no major "pandemic peace treaty," no all-out party. Perhaps, at best, there'll be a bunch of little ones. And that forces us to ask: How will this end?
The virus isn't going to disappear.       
   Our vaccines are incredibly safe and effective. For those who are vaccinated, they are a ticket back to "normal" life. Indeed, though rushed and poorly messaged, the CDC's guidance allowing vaccinated people to go unmasked both indoors and outdoors is based in strong science. Evidence has demonstrated that the risk of serious infection in the real world is astoundingly low, and that the viral load in the nasopharynx of vaccinated people is lower — likely explaining the reduced risk of transmission.
    Yet, some people aren't getting vaccinated. And worse, the distribution of vaccinations isn't even. If, for example, unvaccinated people were evenly distributed in the population, the probability that they would be exposed to the virus if 70% of eligible people were vaccinated would be quite low. After all, 70% of the people around them would be vaccinated and therefore far less likely to pass the virus on. That's how herd — or community — immunity works. The problem though is that just like the virus itself, the behavioral scourge of vaccine rejection spreads from person to person in localized communities. So those who are unvaccinated are more likely to live among others who are unvaccinated, increasing their collective probability of infecting each other.
    The likely scenario is that while communities with high vaccine uptake will get to a point where outbreaks are small, self-delimited, and rare — other communities that remain poorly vaccinated will continue to experience larger, more common, and more deadly outbreaks. And the virus will remain a looming concern in the U.S.
    The other issue is viral evolution. New seasonal variants will likely spread among us every fall and winter akin to seasonal flu, which kills tens of thousands of Americans every year. Some COVID seasons will be milder, some far deadlier. And just like the flu, we'll likely need annual boosters against it.
    Some things change.                                      
    But the virus isn't the pandemic's only ingredient — just the foundational one. For people who never got sick, COVID-19 still changed their lives. There is, of course, no singular pandemic experience. For millions of low-income "essential" workers, the pandemic meant fearing every day that you might be infected at work, or worse, bring the virus home with you to infect someone you love. For millions of healthcare workers, the pandemic meant watching your patients die without their loved ones as you struggled to manage the overflow. For others privileged enough to work from home, the pandemic meant endless days of Zoom calls while your kids tried to learn across from you at the dinner table.
    As I wrote previously, work from home is going to be a much more common feature of American life. Small businesses, major corporations, and even some government agencies have found that their workers are surprisingly productive from home — and have reconsidered plans to come "back" to work in the office. And workers themselves have found they like using their own bathroom and eating out of their own fridge at lunch.
    Indeed, as many workplaces begin to plan to come back to the offices, workers are pushing back. After Apple CEO Tim Cook sent a note to Apple employees requiring them to be back in the office on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays beginning in September, Apple employees circulated a letter in response:  
    "We ask for your support in enabling those who want to work remotely / in location-flexible ways to continue to do so, letting everyone figure out which work setup works best for them, their team, and their role — be it in one of our offices, from home, or a hybrid solution. We are living proof that there is no one-size-fits-all policy for people. For Inclusion and Diversity to work, we have to recognize how different we all are, and with those differences, come different needs and different ways to thrive. We feel that Apple has both the responsibility to recognize these differences, as well as the capability to fully embrace them. Officially enabling individual management chains and individual teams to make decisions that work best for their teams roles, individuals, and needs — and having that be the official stated policy rather than the rare individual exceptions — would alleviate the concerns and reservations many of us currently have."
    Other companies, like Dropbox, have preempted this demand simply by offering work from home options permanently.
    Beyond employee preference, companies attempting to go back to a brick-and-mortar office space will face the question of risk tolerance. As we well know, some eschewed any sort of pandemic protection — be it a mask or a vaccine — from the jump. Others, despite being fully vaccinated, remain hesitant to share enclosed space. How to navigate lower risk tolerances remains a serious challenge. Part of making workplaces safe may mean mandating vaccines, which has prompted serious pushback in the courts of law and public opinion by anti-vaxxer activists who want to use the pandemic as another line of attack. Navigating these challenges is, in part, what is pushing more and more employers to offer alternative working arrangements. Needless to say, some alterations to working conditions because of the pandemic are likely here to stay.
    Other things stay the same (again).                                      
    Some pandemic experiences were universal. For children, the pandemic has been a catastrophe. Not only has learning lagged, but children have been robbed of valuable socialization and milestones. Indeed, the consequences have been far worse for poorer students, disproportionately children of color, for whom access to quality WiFi and reliable computers are limited. All indications suggest that kids will be back to school in the fall as vaccinations among teachers and students press on.
    Access to other people and the venues in which we enjoyed their company was limited if available at all. Restaurants, concert venues, theme parks, theaters — even stores and shopping malls — had limited access.
    But that's changing. Prompted by the CDC's new guidelines for vaccinated people, many of these venues have rushed to reopen, and Americans are slowly but surely taking advantage. Flight traffic is increasing. Last week, LAX, one of the country's busiest airports, logged a 2021 record. And businesses can't hire people fast enough to accommodate their needs.
    Though worries about COVID-19 exposure — particularly for children who cannot yet be vaccinated — persist. Yet as cases continue to fall, and vaccines are approved for younger and younger children, these, too, will subside.
    The doomsday scenario.                                      
    But there remains a possibility that experiences of the pandemic we haven't had since last fall come crashing back. Cases climb, hospitals fill up, and thousands more Americans die. And that's a resistant strain.
    We've now identified several variants of the virus that are more transmissible, and some more deadly, than the original garden-variety ("wild type") virus we experienced through most of 2020. Thankfully none of them have fully evaded our vaccine-mediated immunity. Yet.
    Every single unvaccinated person presents an evolutionary opportunity for the virus. And even as the U.S. and other high-income countries approach a virus-stifling level of vaccination, the rest of the world continues to lag. Some countries have yet to get their first vaccines. New variants with frightening capabilities continue to emerge in these countries. Indeed, last week a new variant with aspects of the Alpha variant and the Delta variant emerged in Vietnam. So even as vaccine manufacturers roll out boosters to protect against the growing plethora of new variants, a doomsday scenario, where a more transmissible, lethal variant evolves, becomes more likely.
    And so, we can't take for granted that this is a truly global pandemic. And until the rest of the world receives what they need to "end" this pandemic, we won't see our end either.
***
    Dr. Abdul El-Sayed is a physician, epidemiologist, public health expert, and progressive activist who served as Detroit's health director and ran for governor in 2018. He is the author of Healing Politics: A Doctor's Journey Into the Heart of Our Political Epidemic and Medicare for All: A Citizen's Guide, as well as the newsletter The Incision. Get more at incision.substack.com.
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murusagi · 4 years ago
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Your Guide to Kimi Wa Yukima Ni Koinegau a.k.a. Kimiyuki (Part 1)
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Kimi Wa Yukima Ni Koinegau is an upcoming otome game by Otomate and Watanabe Entertainment. I don’t know what’s gotten into me but I decided to translate some information provided in the website. May post another update soon!
Storyline
The first year of the Kyoho era, when Yoshimune Tokugawa ruled over Edo as the eighth shogun.
Strange occurrences involving monsters were becoming more and more frequent in Edo, causing the townspeople to grow anxious and discontent. In order to maintain the public order, the Tokugawa shogunate established an organization called "Oniwaban" to crack down on the monsters.  
The seasons changed, and eleven years have passed since then.
In a village far from Edo, there lived a girl who possesses special power. Wherever she sees a "black thread," disaster is sure to follow in that place. The villagers, creeped out, chase her away to the snow-covered depths of the mountains.
Then, a man who calls himself a part of the "Oniwaban" appears before her…
This is a story of the encounter between a single girl and "non-humans", and getting to know love.
World
Edo : A city established by the founder of the Tokugawa shogunate, Ieyasu Tokugawa. It was divided into three districts that were built around the Tokugawa clan's castle, "Chiyoda Castle".
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Buke : A district that is the center of politics and samurai. Feudal lords' residence and buildings owned by samurai can often be found in this section. Since there are no shops around, and not all people can enter this place, it is mostly quiet.
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Zyouka : A district that is the center of trading and common folks. Merchant houses and stores owned by common people are clustered in this area. Since this place has the most number of people, it is a very lively district.
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Goraku: A bustling district that is the center of art, a place filled with theaters, red-light districts and gambling houses. Due to how bustling it is, this place has looser rules compared to other districts. Fights also often occur here.
Before moving on to the characters, here's some note:
Kiko: An existence created by the shogunate's personal exorcist to subjugate Yoika, a being that brings calamity in the evening.
Characters
Suzuno (Name is changeable) CV: None
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One who calls upon calamity "Why me? I'm simply a country girl, not someone who could be approached by a samurai…"
The protagonist of this story, a descendant of the Hakuseki clan. Due to her ability to see the "thread of emotion" that no one else can see, she is feared and called a monster by the villagers. She is chased away to the snow-covered recess of the mountains. Despite being a careless person, she is optimistic and kind-hearted.
Takamura Tomonari CV: Kobayashi Yusuke
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The quiet and faithful one "I don't know about the others Kiko, but… I just do what I want to do."
The person who comes to pick up the protagonist, a new Kiko who joined the Oniwaban about a year ago. While having a calm personality, he is seen as a cold person due to his tendency to keep distance from others. However, for some reason, he seems to feel something special only to the protagonist and treats her gently.
Toujou Kunitaka CV: Tomoaki Maeno
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The gentle and chivalrous one "Rest assured. If you come to our place, I'll assume responsibility and look after you."
Another Kiko who comes to pick up the protagonist. Friendly and good at taking care of others, he is also keeping an eye out on the protagonist as his new junior. While being in charge of the Buke district, he takes care of Tomonari as his senior. However, he is seen as an annoying person due to his excessive caring. Not only that, but he is also hated by his pet sparrow. His suffering and struggles never end.
Yoichi CV: Yamashita Seiichirou
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The lazy and blunt one "You don't have anything more to say, right? Get out, then. You're disturbing my break."
A Kiko who gathers information while running a liquor store called "Yanagiya" in the Zyouka district. Due to his lazy and moody personality, he always acts in a way where he can slack off. A blunt person who speaks his mind without mincing his words. Because of that, he showed a harsh attitude during his first meeting with the protagonist. A glutton who likes to eat excessive amounts of food.
Kuga Genjuurou CV: Satou Takuya
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The diligent and upright one "That power… Are you prepared to use it for the shogunate?"
A Kiko specialized in combat, in charge of the Zyouka district like Yoichi. Formally, his job is to guard and patrol around Edo as one of the security officials. Having a calm personality on top of being a hard worker, he is a serious person who looks after Yoichi as a part of his senior duties. He has a genuine interest in what kind of power the protagonist had.
Kinji CV: Namikawa Daisuke
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The beautiful and self-centered one "So what brings you here today? Did you come to be mocked again?"
A Kiko who collects information as a kabuki actor at a theater called "Kikusatoya" in the Goraku district. A selfish person with high self-esteem, enjoys teasing people to kill time. In contrast to his appearance, he is very strong and destroys things from time to time as a result of his inability to control his power. The most senior one among the Kikos.
Outaro CV: Saito Soma
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The lively one "Hahaha! You're an interesting fellow, huh, getting lost while chasing a pickpocket."
Formally, his job is to lure more customers to the Goraku district. But he's also a Kiko who collects information. Able to get along with anyone due to his bright and friendly nature. A dexterous person and is also quick on his feet. He likes interesting things and even though he tends to get easily carried away, he's good at making his way in life. He's also friendly with the protagonist.
Link for part two
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taylizmasterpost · 4 years ago
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Jake Gyllenhaal and Jealous Liz (October 2010 - February 2011)
Now, there’s a lot to say about Jake and Taylor. The time they got together was a time when he was promoting his movie, Love and Other Drugs, and she was about to drop Speak Now. So at first glance, it look a lot like a traditional PR stunt. However, they do not have a first public meeting -- something that Taylor has with a lot of her other PR relationships (think Calvin at the Fund Fair or Harry at the KCAs), and seemed generally more camera shy. 
Jake’s costar in Love and Other Drugs, Anne Hathaway, was also single at the time, and arguably a PR relationship between the two of them would’ve drummed up significantly more buzz for the film, so stunting with Taylor seems an odd choice.
Jake also reportedly annoyed Taylor with how much he wanted to hide from the press, which is interesting. I’m not totally certain if they were real or not, but I’ll put all of their stuff in here, because it’s interesting to note Liz’s reaction to all of it, despite her relationship:
23 October 2010 - Emma Stone hosts SNL. Both Taylor and Jake G show up to support her, supposedly they’ve already started dating at this point and this was their first public appearance together.
"They walked around together backstage, but they were careful not to be seen too close. It was hard to tell if they were together, but everyone was shocked that she brought him," a source told People magazine.
Notice the lack of public meeting. Strange that they just showed up together dating. 
24 October 2010 - Liz tweets about listening to Never Grow Up
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October 2010 - Taylor writes All Too Well, the first of the three “Nashville songs” -- All Too Well, State of Grace, Stay Stay Stay-- that were written for the Red album before she moved to LA, based on the fact that she said she started writing for Red slightly before Speak Now was released.
We also know All Too Well has to have been written in 2010 because what the copyright record for it says:
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Now, it seems to me that this is too soon to be about Jake. It’s obviously a breakup song, and Taylor and Jake have only just started dating (unless they had a secret dating history we don’t know about). It would be weird for her to be writing all this about him while they’re still dating.
All Too Well could be about any of the three women I’ve spoken previously about in this masterpost. However, I’m going to try to make the case that this song is for Liz:
All Too Well is Liz’s favorite song from Red. She has said so on multiple occasions. Years later, when she came to watch Taylor’s Reputation tour in Glendale, Taylor even played it for her as the surprise song. Sure, it could just be that Liz is just a fan, but the song fits where we are in the timeline. Liz has moved on with someone else. Taylor is trying to get over it, but she can’t help but think back to the past she remembers “all too well.”
If the song is about a woman, lines like “back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known” reads to me as Taylor making a (possibly unfounded) dig at closeting. All Too Well also carries the bad driving metaphor with “almost ran the red,” which runs throughout a lot of the other Liz songs on Red, and which Liz will later reference herself in her own music. The lines in the bridge about “asking for too much” and “running scared,” remind me of Taylor insisting she was single during Valentine’s Day, despite spending it with Liz, only to turn around and miss her once Liz got a boyfriend. Lines about loss of innocence are also interesting, when we think about that L Chat post about Liz from earlier...
Of course, obviously, you can think this song is about whoever you want. If you wanna claim it for JH or Joe Jonas or Taylor Lautner or maybe even some girl Taylor went to high school with, be my guest. I personally don’t buy it being about Emily in a post-Dear John world, and the timeline doesn’t read as Jake to me, so I’m giving it to Liz!
25 October 2010 - Speak Now is released. In the album’s prologue, she specifies that the song “Long Live” is for her band, which is interesting to me, considering that the bridge of the song sounds like it might be about a relationship, and the secret message of the song is “For you,” which sounds oddly specific:
Will you take a moment? Promise me this That you’ll stand by me forever But, if God forbid, fate should step in And force us into a goodbye If you have children someday When they point to the pictures, Please tell ‘em my name
The secret message for Mine is “Toby,” which is the name of the actor who played her love interest during the song, making it make no sense for the song to be about him (and, in my eyes, making it more likely she was trying to cover up who the song was really for). We’ve already discussed Story of Us having “CMT Awards” and Back to December having “Tay,” so I won’t beat you over the head with those.
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Unlike the original handwritten lyrics to Sparks Fly, which featured the lyric “Get me with those brown eyes, baby,” the version that Taylor put on the Speak Now album had the lyric “hit me with those green eyes, baby,” with the eye color presumably being changed because Liz has green eyes:
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The secret message for Sparks Fly is “Portland, Oregon,” which is where Taylor and The Agency covered Tom Petty’s song American Girl in May 2009 during the height of early TayLiz. 
26 October 2010 - Taylor and Jake are spotted together in Brooklyn getting lunch with Emma Stone:
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Liz does a sound check for Taylor for the Today Show. A video later gets posted on YouTube and someone leaves this comment noting Taylor and Liz’s chemistry:
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31 October 2010 - Taylor and Jake are spotted in Big Sur together and stay at California’s Post Inn Ranch. 
Liz spends Halloween with her boyfriend:
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1 November 2010 - Taylor’s appearance on Ellen airs. Ellen asks her about Jake. Taylor says “I’m always optimistic about love. Yes, always, sometimes.”
2 November 2010 - Taylor and Jake are spotted in Santa Barbara together. They get ice cream, interact with fans, and Taylor reportedly laughs at everything Jake says.
16 November 2010 -  Jake attends the Love and Other Drugs premiere alone. This is interesting to me, considering if this was a PR relationship you would’ve thought he’d bring Taylor as his date. Still, Paula made some weird decisions in her time as Taylor’s publicist (like putting her with a carousel of 18 year olds), so this could just be Paula thinking that Taylor showing up at the premiere with him would be too obviously read as a stunt. Doesn’t rule it either way. Still, I think Anne would’ve been a better choice for PR for this.
Mid November - Perez Hilton alleges that Jake has picked up Taylor on his private jet to fly her to London because she was “feeling lonely.” Jake was in London promoting Love and Other Drugs so this seems very stunty to me personally.
22 November 2010 - Taylor attends the American Music Awards and wins Favorite Female Country Artist.
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Liz tweets congratulations at her and seems generally excited.
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24 November 2010 - Love and Other Drugs is officially released in theaters.
25 November 2010 - Taylor and Jake spend Thanksgiving in Brooklyn with Jake’s family.
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26 November 2010 - Liz seems to have spent Thanksgiving with Jason:
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27 November 2010 - Taylor and Jake are spotted in a coffee house in Nashville:
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And, maybe in response, Liz makes this weird and vaguely jealous Tweet:
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Now, I don’t know what this means. Maybe the “you” refers to Liz and she’s having what Carly Rae Jepsen would call “boy problems” -- feeling torn and overburdened between a best friend and boyfriend:
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Or, perhaps, the “you” in this Tweet refers to Taylor, and Liz is trying to say that Jake is “using her up,” maybe meaning taking up her time. Or maybe Liz wasn’t referring to any of this. We can’t really know. Still, it’s interesting.
29 November 2010 - TayLiz hang out and Liz tweets about it. Perhaps to make up for the lack of time spent together since they both got boyfriends.
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30 November 2010 - Taylor and Jake have coffee in Nashville:
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1 December 2010 - Taylor writes a MySpace post about the CMTs.
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Liz tweets about watching Glee, meaning she’s the one who got Taylor hooked on the show and therefore interested in Dianna. Hilarious.
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2 December 2010 - Taylor calls Love and Other Drugs a “good movie” when asked about it, and won’t say anything more. She also adamantly refuses to talk about her personal life (This gives me 2018/19 Joe vibes, whatever that means).
3 December 2010 - Liz tweets that her favorite song on Speak Now is Last Kiss. She also tweets at Jason about his cooking:
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5 December 2010 - Jake is asked about Taylor and says this:
“One of the greatest parts about being in a relationship is the intimacy you share, but it can be difficult if you’re being watched the whole time.”
This reminds me so much of what Taylor’s currently saying about Joe. Interesting, looking back on it.
7 December 2010 - Jake and Taylor do the “maple latte” pap walk stunt in Brooklyn with Maggie and her daughter. This is the only series of photos of them that I think was a set-up, but that means it’s pretty gross this is the one they chose to bring a child into:
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I think the reason this was so obviously a pap walk was to get the “maple latte” in the shot. I’ve already speculated that Taylor had written All Too Well prior to her relationship with Jake, and this stunty pap walk would make sense if she needed to use him to cover for it.
8 December 2010 - Liz makes another weird vague possibly jealous tweet:
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Now, in the context of Mine possibly being about Liz and Taylor saying that song is about her “tendency to run from love,” it’s possible Liz is shading Taylor’s pap walk with Jake the previous day. This tweet feels very “back before you lost the one real thing you’ve ever known.”
However, maybe she’s just really happy with Jason. I don’t know. I don’t know these people.
9 December 2010 - Taylor and Jake drive around LA, Jake yells at the paps.
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Compare these to those photos with Taylor Lautner earlier in the timeline. These are not nearly as staged. Take away from that whatever you will.
13 December 2010 - Taylor turns 21. Liz and Caitlin bring her a pizza. Liz tweets at Taylor that she’s changed her life. This is supposedly the birthday that Jake didn’t show up to that The Moment I Knew is about. Liz and Caitlin bringing her pizza if she’s sad about it would make sense...
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31 December 2010 - Taylor and Liz spotted together in Nashville. They get Pei Wei and JustJared calls Liz a “gal pal.” Taylor seems upset, possibly about her whole Jake birthday thing. Or possibly something else.
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Liz tweets about going for a run and listening to Speak Now:
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5 January 2011 - Taylor and Jake break up.
19 January 2011 - Taylor and Jake are spotted together by fans in Nashville, first at a coffee shop and then at dinner. Jake did not have any other business in Nashville, so it can be assumed he came there to talk to Taylor:
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CONCLUSION: Were Taylor and Jake real? I don’t know. They really only ever did that one pap walk and didn’t seem to publicly promote each other’s work, as far as I could find, despite both releasing projects while together. The one pap walk they did seems to maybe have been to cover for All Too Well, which had possibly already been written (likely about Liz) before Jake and Taylor started dating.
Were those tweets from Liz jealousy? Or am I reading too much into it?
Either way, Taylor’s had her fun, and now it’s time to maybe start thinking about getting back together with Liz. There’s just one problem: her boyfriend.
The Speak Now Tour Begins (February 2011 - May 2011)
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