#is it a problem with me? do i need to change something? am i at fault for failing to communicate what I want to others?

[great-and-small]

Speaking of breed standards, would you be able to give me some context on what the heck is up with the German Shepherd "stack"? I see a lot of GSD owners saying it's breed standard and therefore fine, but the slant looks so extreme in some dogs that I have some skepticism about it (and also because, of course, breed standards have nothing to do with animal health).

This is a pretty hot button issue and you’re right that there is a ton of bickering back and forth about it online. I’m happy to share my thoughts, but keep in mind that as a veterinarian I am biased towards function over form. I care way more about if a dog can do the things it wants/needs to do than how it looks. I won’t get into it here but I actually have real qualms with the distinction between “working line” and “show line” in some breeds.

My quick takeaway opinion- There are several orthopedic issues in the German Shepherd dog (specifically show lines) that have likely been exacerbated if not entirely caused by breeders striving for the classic “sloped back” look that is considered breed standard.

Now that being said, it is a fact that the three point stack (how a dog is positioned when standing) greatly exaggerates the angulation of the back and hind legs. You will often see comparison images like this one that show a dog in stack versus standing square and you can clearly see the top line looks more sloped when the dog is stacked. This image is from a GSD subreddit, a pretty dog here nicely demonstrating how the stance can change the appearance of the top line.

This phenomenon is what certain hardline GSD breed standard loyalists will point to when discussing this issue. They posit that the sloped back is essentially an optical illusion caused by aesthetic posing, and therefore a German Shepherd is no more prone to orthopedic problems than any other large breed dog. This is where I disagree.

You can easily find stark examples of a poorly put together dog in any breed or mixed breed out there, so when discussing my concerns with the GSD I will only use photos of titled dogs that are accomplished within the show ring. These are not random backyard bred shepherds, but champion dogs from acclaimed lines that will almost certainly be bred to pass on their genes. When breed clubs like the AKC award these dogs as exemplars of the breed, they tacitly endorse the conformation issues I’m about to discuss. So my beef is not with German shepherds or dog breeds in general, but specifically with breed clubs that refuse to examine whether their standard harms animals. An important disclaimer, not every breed club is like this and many take health concerns extremely seriously.

Dogs have a very different limb anatomy and gait to humans and a healthy dog is meant to walk on their paw pads. The “ankle” or hock should be upright and angled as you can see here in this nice-looking champion shepherd from 1902.

German shepherds can sometimes have a problem that is colloquially called “dropped hocks” where that joint is abnormally loose and in more serious cases can even be touching the ground, which is completely abnormal and something I would consider a serious physical flaw. A dog having dropped hocks/tarsal hyperflexion like this is proven to cause medical issues for these dog, but unfortunately the sinking joints also help to give the dog that “classic” sloping look that breed clubs love.

This dog “Ch Kysarah's Pot of Gold” won best of breed at the National dog show in 2015. You can see his hock is literally flat on the ground even when not stacked

And it’s not just one dog. Here is another champion dog (Cruaghaire Catoria), who got some controversy for winning best of breed at Crufts in 2016 despite an extremely abnormal gait.

Perhaps we could excuse the low hocks when the dog is standing as being the result of the stack, but it is glaringly obvious when she moves that this is no trick of her positioning. Her entire tarsus rests on the floor as she runs and in close ups you can even see bald patches there to suggest this is a “normal” gait for her. In this video, the announcers agree that this is the ideal gait for a shepherd. If I saw this gait in a friend’s dog I’d politely express my concerns for long term mobility issues and recommend an orthopedic consultation. To see it win best of breed is galling to say the least.

And lest you think the problem has been solved, here’s another from the National Dog Show in 2023

None of these dogs could charge athletically into a field and effectively herd sheep. If we are prioritizing aesthetic over function to the degree that a dog cannot do what it was bred to do, or more importantly that it cannot do the simple things that dogs love to do, then we have veered unforgivably off course. Not to put too fine a point on it but what the fuck is the point of a breed standard if it impedes the dog’s function in any way? We have no right. German shepherds are an incredible breed of dog that have stood by us humans in some of our darkest moments; I think the breeders and kennel clubs who claim to love them the most should work harder to ensure the “champion” dogs they are producing can live long pain-free lives. If we have to adjust our notion of what the breed is “supposed” to look like then so fucking be it.

This is too long already so I’m not getting into hip dysplasia, DM, carpal laxity, elbow dysplasia or other conditions that exist in the breed. If German shepherd clubs want to distance themselves from the notion that their breed standard is causing problems with canine health then they will need to stop publicly lavishing awards on dogs with medically concerning gait issues and start focusing on breeding dogs that can run around a ring without causing even the most casual of onlookers to realize “something’s not right there”

[fisherrprince]

friends, countrymen. if you feel the urge to go to the chiropractor because your body aches, you do not want a chiropractor, you want a massage.

“but fish” you may say. “that sounds. scary” it’s not. if you really have an aversion to people touching you, at all, ever, maybe this isn’t for you. but a chiropractor isn’t for you either, because they also touch you a lot. In the case that you think you’d be chill with it for an hour, im going to describe in detail more or less what to expect at a massage appointment.

-

why not a chiropractor?

we’re not going to get into it, but a chiropractor tries to put your bones back in alignment. This is functionally useless if your tight muscles are pulling on your bones in the first place! They’ll just go back to being achy and out of alignment within the week. You need to be addressing the root of the problem. a massage may not fix it (sorry. it takes work on your part), but it may help your muscles relax so you can train them to chill out and sit in their correct spots. plus it feels nice. if you feel like you need something more intense, go for a deep pressure therapy massage. it digs into your sore muscles without the danger of a chiropractor.

what does the room look like?

in most cases, when a massage parlor has an official building, the massage room is a small dim-ish room with one massage table, maybe a chair, and some cubbies or cabinets either for the masseuse's tools or for your clothes. there may be decorations, candles, fake candles, little speakers, a mirror, or pillows. the massage table looks like a little twin mattress with a donut pillow sticking out the top and blankets covering the mattress. The table is also usually heated, and you can adjust the heat by asking for it.

what stuff is also there?

smells there are smells in there, usually woody, floral, or natural scents like cedar, eucalyptus, lavender, chamomile, or peppermint. sometimes you get to choose your smells. if there's a smell you don't like (eg lavender, which makes me sneeze), politely ask not to use that one. very few massage parlors have no smells at all, but I've found that most places aren't nearly as overwhelming as, say, a bath and body works, which sucks to be in.

music or nature sounds. think stereotypical soft spa music. I've never encountered a situation where the music bothered me, but you can also request to change it.

lotions and/or oils they go on your body, because rubbing your hands against your skin for a long time without a buffer irritates your skin! they are where most of the smells comes from, if there's not a diffuser in the room. again, if a smell is bad, politely request to not use that smell. the oils may also get in your hair or on your underclothes, if you keep them on.

warm things sometimes the masseuse will use warm things, like warm towels or warm rocks, on you. they're usually nice in the same way a hot tub is nice - a little hot at first, and then warm. if they use a warm towel, it's probably going on your feet or back or neck. warm rocks will usually go on your back. I've never encountered warm rocks but they're in the promo pictures so, i suppose you'd need to do something other than a deep pressure therapy massage to get warm rocks.

some talking at the beginning, the masseuse may instruct you to take some deep breaths and relax, like the beginning of a meditation. she will usually not keep talking the entire time unless you're talkative. I often fall asleep.

what am I expected to do?

you'll enter the room, the masseuse will ask you what you want her to focus on, and she'll leave for a few minutes to let you undress. You can undress to your comfort level, but I usually at least decide to go topless, because it helps them reach my back better and my upper back hurts. once you're as comfortable as you can be, slide in under the blankets (both blankets if there's two) on the table and leave only your head poking out. if she doesn't tell you to start on your back or stomach, pick one, doesn't often matter.

you are fully expected to let her know at the beginning if there are areas you don't want her touching, and you're expected to let her know if she's going too hard or too gentle on your muscles. her goal is your comfort and relief!

then what happens?

chillax for a while. the masseuse will move around the table, addressing your muscles bit by bit. usually, they'll start with a scalp massage, and then move down. aside from massaging you, she will often move your limbs around, tuck the blanket around you, or put things like rolled towels or pillows under you at times. you are just supposed to lay there, relax, and let her do so.

good massage feels like anywhere from a nice backrub to that good sore you feel poking a bruise or moving after working out real hard. it should not actively hurt -- let him know it hurts if it does.

what do I do after?

when she leaves the room to let you redress, do that, and then go meet her in the lobby to pay her (if you haven't already) or for a brief touch base. if this is like, a fancy resort massage, they'll have a whole dressing room you're supposed to go back to, so you won't see your masseuse again. he's probably washing up.

drink water! often they'll give you some water afterwards. It's because loosening your tight muscles opens them up to water your body wants to give them anyways, so you might get a little dehydrated.

eat a snack with vitamins in it, like nuts or fruit. if you had a massage that really beat you up (I asked for this a few times while recovering from an injury), take an advil too. Normally, you won't need pain reliever even a little bit.

if it was nice, leave a little tip.

miscellaneous tips

if this is your first time, go for the shortest option so you can see if you like it or not. often, they'll have a first time client discount.

don't be afraid to fall asleep or snore or anything. they don't care.

they also shouldn't care about your body type. To be polite, take a shower at least the night before going in, but I guarantee they couldn't care less about what you look like, only that your muscles are stiff.

don't be too annoyed if you asked for neck and shoulders and the masseuse is hanging out at your feet. remember to specify exactly what you want at the beginning, but your muscles are all connected, and your legs are probably tight too.

try to find an independent company. massage envy might be good for a first attempt if you're worried about them pushing too hard, but they aren't as good or personalized as some guy who's been doing this for 40 years.

when you lay on your stomach, stick your face in the donut pillow in a way that lets your face stick out the hole, but try not to line the middle of your neck up with the edge of the bed. it's a little uncomfy.

you are fully within your rights to wear a mask during your massage.

please tell them your allergies! especially if it's to coconut oil!

[utilitycaster]

Imo (as someone who didn't watch the finale, so I'm happy to be wrong), one of the bigger problems with the ending that isn't being discussed is that religions don't work like that. I'm not talking about cosmology or divinity, which people have already spoken on plenty, but the people who actually believe the beliefs.

There are people who believe their god was in some way mortal (Buddhists, some Christians), but they still practice the belief. I'm Jewish, and if it was definitively proven that God isn't real, I would still be a practicing Jew. The gods of Exandria becoming mortal would definitely cause schisms and theological debates, but the gods as concepts would continue to hold power regardless of their mortality or continued existence. Vasselheim would change, but it wouldn't be rocked to its knees.

Obviously, the cast has their own biases and thoughts on religion. That's understandable, but in a campaign and world that is increasingly about How Religion Amd Gods Shape Things, why is religion treated only as a plot point and not a dynamic of understanding the world, yaknow?

This is a hard question to answer since I think to truly give a good answer I'd need a thesis statement and several weeks of writing, but in short, as myself a practicing Jew and philosophically somewhere between weak and apathetic agnosticism I agree that Exandria as a setting did a good job of exploring individual faith/devotion to divinity, and a very bad job of exploring the concept of religion on an anthropological level.

I do think the fact that most of the people with whom I can have a conversation about this are either fellow non-Christians existing in a Christian dominated society; left-leaning Catholics from a rigorous intellectual tradition in the Protestant-dominated US; or people who left a more conservative Christian sect for a more progressive one and in doing so interrogated the nature of religion and faith is telling. I think if you were raised strictly Christian and either swore off religion entirely (the ex-Evangelicals who never unlearned lack of empathy/self-centeredness and simply applied it in a different direction) or were raised Christian but not particularly religious and live in a culturally Christian society in which that is the norm and thus you never had to see yourself as a person with an identity and a practice outside said norm, you are far more likely fail to adequately notice this as a problem with Exandrian worldbuilding.

Something that struck me as I thought about this (on my solo walks to and from synagogue today, no less) is that I am someone who for various reasons, academic, religious, and otherwise, has spent a lot of time thinking about the role of ritual in daily life. And the thing is, "ritual" has in many cases been coopted into a thing you do very much for yourself, often with a capitalist slant - self-care as consumption as ritual. (If you look up companies named Ritual, it's zero proof spirits and vitamins/supplements and takeout). It is individualist and is intended to soothe one's self.

Ritual is far more than that. Ritual is a sign of community. It is a means of remembrance. It is a reminder to look outside of yourself. We light candles on Friday night not for ourselves - indeed, we are prohibited from using them as a light source - but to welcome someone of something else. We blow the shofar to wake ourselves and our community up to what we can can change and do better.

Jester and Caduceus are in my opinion the strongest practitioners of ritual across campaigns, but both are from very small groups of practitioners. We meet many clerics and adherents, but their stories or their experiences with religion as part of daily life are largely untold.

And this is just about ritual, which is in many cases neutral or even positive, but as discussed there is no real hegemony - Vasselheim holds respect and serves as a vault for divine secrets, but outside of that has little political sway. Caduceus and Fjord do not answer to Hierophant Ophera. We also see very little of those theological questions or debates - one must imagine they occur, but it, like the world of ritual or religious service, feels oddly empty. There are temples, and there are keepers of those temples, but the temples always feel like they pop into existence for the PCs and vanish when they're not present. I remember during Campaign 2 there was a great discussion of how D&D offers a concept of religion without the need for faith in the unseen - the gods exist definitively - and it just feels like that's never been reflected meaningfully in the world of Exandria, and that wasn't really a problem with Campaigns 1 or 2 and it very much was with the concepts C3 attempted to tackle.

[the-deraged-lunatic-askblog]

"Crazy" || The Hunter AU (ONE-SHOT)

Somewhere lost in the back of time, there is a place where all forgotten histories are told, a mysterious place called "The Unknown"

The days were as lovely as a gradmas's kiss on the cheek, warm and cozy, yet nostalgic and old as you could walk between the trees in almost an eternal autumn

Nights, didn't keep the unknown's majestic nature, but rather the coldness of the darkness itself. Walking through the leaves is not a safe act, as creatures and devils hide in the dark waiting for the next souls to find. Those who grow with the unknown's nature knows that like their own names, but those who don't...

"Excuse me?.... Sir?" They don't know anything.

A person asked a mysterious figure, who was cutting a tree with a axe, and had a lantern on his other hand. As a response, the mysterious one decided to look at them. They lost their words when they felt red and tired eyes looking directly at their soul. Now the person could see clearly how this stranger looked just... Wrong, pretty young but... wrong

"Yes?..." Their voice, it sounded so weak... Like after being destroyed by a tragedy

The state of the boy was deplorable, the person can't just not feel petty for him, his dark eye bags and their dirty clothes warms other's hearts. Despite the situation, this stranger makes their sympathy to wake up

"Do you know how to get back to Massachusetts?"

"Massachusetts?' it seems he never heard about it before

'You know, the state? I-I'm not sure where I am but I know these aren't the forests of Massachusetts" They got a tiny bit nervous "You know, you don't need to know where it is, I just wanna know where I am exactly"

"Oh, well..." He stopped for a moment to think, as a little smile appeared on his face "It may sound a little... Weird... but this place is called... The Unknown."

"The- The unknown? Like the unknown itself?'

The stranger affirmed

"But- The unknown is an abstract concept! that's impossible"

He laughed a little "Oh believe me... In the unknown, the possibilities are endless..." Soon after he said that, he started to pet a lantern so dearly with his palm "Anything can happen in the unknown! Like blessings... And tragedies"

He sounded quite sad in the last sentence, the person tried to change the subject "So this place is basically like a fairytale?"

"I don't think this is that kind of story..." but before the person could say something, he already spoke "But I know how to bring you back home"

"You- you do? I thought you didn't know what Massachusetts even is"

"Oh no, I know about Massachusetts, but I know how to send you right to your home! No pressure no hurry... Fast and easy!" He sounded confident, it was kinda playful from his part

A helpful answer with a charismatic act is enough for a person to be enchanted "Okay okay then, which route should I take?'

"Well... hehe, there are two ways"

"What do you mean two ways?"

He was kind "You can choose one or another, but... If you have problems deciding I can choose one for you"

"I would like to go back home as soon as possible, you could even come with me if you want"

His smile disappeared "... What?"

"Yeah, why not? Sorry but You don't seem very... well or healthy, not to offend of course! But I see you also need some help"

"I need some help?..." It seems it was so shocking to him... And yet, in seconds he made a grin, but his eyes were almost crying "Hah, sure I need help... But I... I can't."

The person looked worried "Why- Why not?"

"Because..." He acted ashamed "Ahg, it's embarrassing to tell you this!"

"No, it's fine! You can tell me whatever you want, I won't judge you..."

"You won't?"

"Of course not! You seem to really need this, man"

"Okay, if you insist..." He clear his throat, it felt like it was something so private for him. Carefully, he gets closer to the person "Did you know... Trees can feel pain?"

The person didn't understand what he was saying "Eh... No?"

He chuckled "That's because it isn't true..." Suddenly, from the disaster of hair he possesses, trapped between the strands he pulled out a rock, with a few hairs left. With a wide grin on his face he got face to face with the person, and screamed "ITS A ROCK FACT!"

And so, he laughed and laughed like a completely maniac in front of their face. The person didn't know what to say, but in their eyes they were regretting all loud. Confused and shocked they remain silent as slowly trying to get away from there, as long the boy kept laughing like a completely lunatic

In one second he looked into their eyes, and his smile dropped

His look feel like a chain back to their interaction, the person couldn't hide that fact. The boy looked at him, his eyes were wide open, the pinkish color on them was almost as bright as the lantern on his hand. The person didn't know what to say, or what even to do, all they did was to remain silent

Suddenly "You said you wouldn't judge me." He didn't sound happy

Even if their mind were white, they tried to at least say something "I don't-" he interrupted

"And you did, in fact, you are judging me right now in this exact instant."

Again, they didn't know what to responde. In that moment the only thing they wanted to do was to leave as soon as possible but, they couldn't just leave... That would be too rude

"Do you know what makes you? A lier, a manipulator"

Finally, that made them actually react "Hey, hold onI was trying to be kind-"

"Tell me, what would you want from me? Going back home of course, you sure were honest with that, and yet you dared to tell me I need some help, and offered me to go with you, but the truth is, you never really care about me, you were just trying to be polite because society teaches you to do so, do you? Not because you are a good person who cares about strangers in deplorable states, but because someone teaches you to do so"

"Hey! Hey! Calm down, I am a good person! I'm just not used to finding people with some mental issues- NO! I mean-"

"Now you call me crazy..."

"No! No like that! You have problems like everyone else and-"

"Ha! Problems like anyone else, yeah sure... you know nothing about me"

"Well it's true that I don't know what happened to you but- hey... I didn't ask your name yet"

"... You wanna know who I am?"

"Uhm.. maybe? I guess I should'

His smiled returned "... Heh, you know... If you have found others before me, once you know who you are talking to, all will make sense!... Promise"

They didn't know where this was going, the person was getting nervous "Rea- really? Are you famous around here?"

He laughed "Well~ when you chase people with an axe you sure make some fame..."

It was just until this moment when the person realized the big axe he had been holding all this time. He noticed, and smiled even more

"Yes, that axe"

The person looked at him for one second, and then just ran

He saw them running away, that really annoyed him "Ahg! I hate when they run." And proceed to chase after them.

Desperation is their guide and their only salvation. They don't know where to go, or even where they are going, just run as fast as their legs allowed them in hopes to get lost from the size of the hunter behind them. His footsteps can be heard clearly from their back, and the light of the lantern exposed both presenses to one another. He hasn't stopped at any moment, while with another new footstep, they feel more and more weak, until they could even collapse. Tears, tears of frustration, fear and more pass through their face and fly away for the wild wind on the running, the desire to scream is powerful but their throat already had enough since moments ago. How long has they been running? It felt like a torture, where time only makes it worse, the intent starts feels useless as is like they are trying to avoid the inevitable

Then, for a moment they dared to look back

Soon the urge to scream came back. They feel something jumping from behind, it pushes them down to the dirt. The pain of the fall is nothing compared to the fear of who is over them now. He was grabbing their wrists with unspeakable force, no matter what they tried, they couldn't come off. The constant intents were starting to make him angry

"Stop! Just STOP please! It's useless now! I know it's horrible but you are only making this harder for both of us!" He tried to calm them down, while trying to find a way to immobilized them completely "Look! I told you to get back home, right? well this is the way! For going back home you need to perish in this forest! Huh!?"

"I'm not that stupid!"

That broke him off

"YES YOU ARE."

Without any warning, they felt a sudden pain in their face. It wasn't that bad, compared to the others that came after that. Cuts, to their arms and legs, torso, neck and face, he would not listen to the screams, crying or the begging, no matter the echo they made through the trees, he knows no one would even dare to come closer, no one would come to save them and that was a relief. Blindly, penetrating their skin with the edge of metal, over and over again, in any place and any zone of their body, no part to waste until he makes sure they are no longer breathing... Or until he feels better

Once the deed was done, Red was the only thing they left in this world. He had some red over him, and an awful lot in the axe. Wirt found himself breathless

"Ah... Ah... Ha... Haha! Hahahaha! HAHAHAHAHA!"

A twisted laugh came from his mouth, yes, but in his eyes were tears falling all over his face.

For all the running they did, Wirt had the fortune to found a river with clean water. Now he was washing his hands, the red abandoning his fingers to paint the water as he watched out for the lantern as his side, making sure it doesn't fall into the river

Wirt always avoids looking at his reflection, mirror or water, he can't imagine how gruesome he must look right now, and doesn't wanna know. He feels foolishness from crying, because he was told 'Humans are trees meant for the oil, and the oil is meant for Greg' The Beast teaches him to avoid all human contact and relationships, so he doesn't get hurt by the petty feelings of sympathy and guilt

It wasn't the first time he did that to someone, sadly he knows it wouldn't be the last, and that person wasn't the most pleasant either... Yet, he needed to apologize

"Sorry for that Greg, you should see that kind of stuff" When he was finishing the hunting, Wirts left Greg in the roots of a tree... In front of everything. Wirt feels so irresponsible. However Greg doesn't seem to be upset with him "'Its okay Wirt, just please be more careful next time!'" and Greg being a supportive brother, maybe a little too much for someone like Hunter. The words of that person are still trapped inside his mind and it won't leave alone his thoughts "yeah you are right, I mean who is this guy to tell me if I, you know, crazy! Ha..."

"Greg, do you think I'm crazy?" Wirt was genuinely worried, he didn't want to admit in front of someone else but he could no longer deny it, it really got him this time. And once again, Greg thinks his answer "Mmmm I don't think so Wirt, but hey! Many geniuses were called crazy too! Like Albert Einstein, Edgar Allan Poe, Nikola Tesla and more! If someone tells you that you are crazy then it's a compliment!"

"Ah compliment, huh?" He didn't though it like that before...

"So Guess they were right..." He is done washing his hands

'I am crazy"

The end.

[itz-pandora]

:/

Well I was bedridden like all morning bc of cramps and because I couldn't get up to make sure my sister was awake, she's mad at me for her missing school (I called her like 4 different times trying to wake her up but I couldn't GET UP) and now she's blaming ME for her missing school and she might miss watching a band concert because of me and I'm like. GIRL. I am NOT responsible for YOU.

Sure, we make sure each other is up sometimes but today I COULDN'T GET UP TO WAKE HER UP. WHEN IT'S NOT MY JOB TO! The situations have been reversed before, where she stayed home and I overslept, but I wasn't a condescending petty bitch about it and I didn't blame her! I was like "oh, my bad, I need to get to ask someone to drive me to school" and I did! I didn't just skip school while being all petty about it.

This girl is a whole ass adult, a whole 18, she's a senior in highschool and she blames me for feeling like shit because I couldn't get up to wake her up?? Like, girl, OWN UP???

She won't even plan extra for her oversleeping???? Like, she misses her alarm so often, while I do it like, half or less of the time she does. She doesn't set extra alarms and she refuses to use anything else than her phone. I'm like GIRL YOU KNOW THIS IS AN ISSUE SO SWALLOW YOUR PRIDE AND SET MORE ALARMS for the love of God this girl can't solve her own problems. LIKE SHUT UP WITH YOUR "I might miss the wind ensemble" while looking at me with that condescending ass smile SHUT THE FUCK UP and you wonder why I'm always on edge around your bitch ass. "You need to get medicated for your anger" YOU need to quit being such an infuriating person! But if I said that then I'd be the bad guy so I just bite my tongue and leave you alone. It's not like I have outbursts or anything, I'm just. Mad. Like, visibly mad, but I'm literally not hurting anyone or anything. I make so many accomodations for this girl but I feel like the asshole if I'd even ask for one. What the fuck.

I'm sick of needing to be the bigger person for a girl that's a year and a half older than me. Sometimes it feels like she only loves me as far enough as I'm useful or entertaining to her. Ugh

I don't hate her, I don't think she's an awful person, but FUCK this girl is in an echo chamber of her own creation and puts herself on a pedestal for it and it drives me nuts

She doesn't realize how genuinely she fucked me up too. She doesn't know how much of my self esteem issues are caused from her. She fucked up my social skills so severely that I automatically assume everyone hates me or is better off without me. I assume everyone else had better friends than me (which is right because I'm so introverted and shy because of her). I only really have somewhere between 2-7 people I consider friends irl and I barely talk to them outside of school. The closest irl person I have is my other sister and she's really my best friend. I've gotten to the point where if I don't talk to someone for long enough, I assume they don't like me or think I'm annoying, and it's so scary because I feel like I can't talk to anyone. It's so isolating, and I'm like 90% sure is stemmed from my sister who's pissing me off stealing my friends form me in elementary school to the point they'd rather hang out with her over me. I used to run to some corner and cry my eyes out because I felt so unloved by any friends around me. When I told her about it, she sounded sympathetic, but never changed her behavior. My mom and dad had to tell her to bring me over to my friends houses if she wanted to go so I wouldn't feel left out, and in retrospect that's so humiliating.

Whatever I just needed to vent.

I'm so sorry for this, I just needed to type something out.

[afreakingdork]

Memo From Dork HQ (Thoughts and Probable Posting Change)

TO: The Void, All Encompassing

FROM: Afreaking Dork, Writer

DATE: 6 February 2025

SUBJECT: Thoughts and Probably Posting Change

It's becoming a bit obvious that I might not be able to keep up the posting schedule. As far as check-ins are concerned, I am not seeing obvious signs of burn out. Instead, there an ever present feeling of stress. Everyday I wake up and think: I need to do x, y, and z to get to a, b, and c, and if I don't do that then I will fall behind and have to push d and maybe e, and what will become of f amongst the changes? It's exhausting and that's just from my hobby. My real jobs require the same mental juggling and I often feel like I am one tossed 'ball' away from having the entire circus come down.

My thoughts and theories on the matter are ones I try to approach scientifically. One may think: Dork wrote two stories simultaneously before, what's the difference? Well, when I wrote Sunshine Moonshine, I foresaw that back to back publishing might not be feasible. I wanted the story to exist and, by nature, I am a person who must write when they want to write. I gave myself no deadline and wrote whenever I felt like it. This worked for a long time, but as the story grew, I began to feel restless for it's existence to come to fruition. I had been commissioning chapter art for it and the artists were asking me when they could share their pieces. I told myself that once a certain point was achieved, I would go ahead and release.

That goal ended up occurring around the time I finished chapter 18 and saw that the fic would end at 20. I premiered the story and came across a new problem I couldn't forsee: I didn't remember what I wrote. I knew the broad strokes, but not the finer details. I like to edit before publishing, but it had been months since I had written some of those chapters. References I made were lost on me and some context had completely evaporated because the origin was gone. It was annoying and ate up more time when I still needed to write two more chapters. The groundwork had been laid, but I didn't have the blueprints.

All while this was happening, the first idea of kenkey popped into my head on January 10, 2024. These ideas would continue to pop and through July, as which time I was refining the outline for what I knew was going to be my next story. By September, the first chapters were opened up to my betas. I had a choice right then of how that would happen and chose to do it on the same weekly basis as Villain's Mark because I didn't want a repeat of forgetting. Remembering what I'm doing and executing it how I want is one of my greatest triumphs as a writer. I hold my words to extremely high regard. I knew it would be tough, but it wasn't like I wasn't already writing multiple stories at once. I figured I could get a few chapters in, maybe six, as a good buffer and that wouldn't be too many that I wouldn't remember.

AENEM was began publishing in November and here we are.

My six chapter buffer has dwindled to one.

(That's three less than Soft Spot)

I have the same desire/drive to write it, but Soft Spot is my baby.

It comes first and has come first for literal years now.

I'm tired of being anxious.

I want to write when I want to write.

I like minimal deadlines, but I feel like I need space.

My brightest idea is moving AENEM to a biweekly publishing, but I don't know.

i have commitments with the chapter artists.

I need time for the betas to edit.

I have to get new commissions done.

It's hard to say what to do next, but something needs to be done.

The only certainty is there will be no change to Soft Spot.

If you are willing, your thoughts are appreciated.

Another Donnie pin-up goes live tonight as your thanks for reading.

[ur-dad-satan]

BarbatosxF!MC (she/they)

Personal Assistant

5.9K words, 18+, MDNI, Enjoy <3

(Including stolen touches, public sex, fingering/hand job, kissing, groping, oral (M & F giving and receiving), M and F orgasms (includes squirt), and face painting)

MC had been living in the Devildom for a few months now, and had taken quite the interest in the Demon Prince's butler. In fact, they would try to help out around the castle anytime they could just to get a little extra off of Barbatos' plate. Whether that was helping Diavolo with his paperwork, or cleaning something that needed to be cleaned, despite the blue haired butler always saying that he could do it himself. MC refused to stop trying to help out and whether it was because she just wanted to be nice, or because Barbatos had piqued her interest and she wanted to get closer to him, she didn't really care.

As much as Barbatos tried to keep his metaphorical distance, he couldn't avoid MC if he tried. The human was virtually everywhere, and as annoying as it could be, it also meant that she was extremely reliable. This came in handy on one summer day when Diavolo was sick with a summer cold, but couldn't reschedule an important meeting. As much as he tried his best to get up and go, he was too sick and Barbatos wouldn't let him. So, as a compromise, he offered to go in the prince's place. However, it would be a lot for one demon. So, Barbatos picked up his D.D.D. and made a call.

"Hello, Barbatos. To what do I owe this pleasure?" Lucifer asked politely when he answered.

"Hello, Lucifer. The young master has come down with a cold, however, I must attend an important meeting and I require a bit of assistance. If you aren't too busy, would you be willing to accompany me in a few hours?" Barbatos asked politely. A small, apologetic, sigh could be heard along with paper rustling from the black-haired man's side of the line.

"I'm sorry, Barbatos, I'm still working on the student council paperwork, and I have to get my brothers to do their paperwork too. Unfortunately, I am extremely busy today. Perhaps MC is available today." Lucifer suggested. Barbatos thought about it for a moment, then spoke once more.

"Very well. Thank you anyway Lucifer. I will check in with MC." Barbatos said genuinely. "Good luck with your brothers." He added.

"Thank you. Please tell Lord Diavolo that we wish him well." Lucifer said. The two finished their conversation, then Barbatos called the human under the same roof.

"Hello?" MC answered pleasantly. Her cheery tone was admittedly a pleasant change from his tired one and Diavolo's sickly one.

"Hello MC. I was wondering if you were free to accompany me to a very important meeting? The young master is sick, and I require a bit of assistance." Barbatos asked.

"Yeah! I can definitely be your assistant!"

"Excellent! Thank you very much, MC." Barbatos said relieved.

"No problem! When is the meeting and what do I need to know?" MC asked. Barbatos shared all of the details including that it was a smart-casual meeting and that he just needed them to be an extra note-taker. Not long after, MC was showing up to the castle to help Barbatos and wish Diavolo well. For the meeting, MC wore a nice light colored blouse and a dark blue skirt; though not matching Barbatos' white button up shirt, and signature blue pants and blazer.

*.*.*.*.*.

During the boring meeting, MC tried their hardest to pay attention, but found themself spacing out once or twice. The second time they zoned out, rather than refocusing on their own, a foot gently nudged their own. Subtly, MC looked up and made eye contact with Barbatos. His eyes practically said 'pay attention', but quite frankly, MC didn't want to. She knew it was an important meeting, but it was so boring. It had already been going on for over an hour and a half! MC already had three pages of hand written notes, and there wasn't an end to this meeting in sight. Suddenly, an idea flashed in her head and she tried to suppress a small smirk.

MC adjusted slightly in her seat and crossed her legs comfortably. She continued writing down notes and paying attention, but let her foot touch Barbatos' leg. A small flicker of acknowledgement barely flashed behind his eyes; however, he didn't stutter or stop speaking. This simply wouldn't do. As Barbatos and the other demons spoke, MC went between paying attention, and writing the important things they said. They waited a few minutes to avoid suspicion from the blue haired demon they had came with, then began to move her foot up and down Barbatos' leg earning a small glance from him, but not much else.

Soon, MC moved their foot higher up Barbatos' leg. His legs were slightly apart, so it was easy for MC to press their foot between their knees. They looked up at him through their lashes as nonchalantly as they could. He shot them another small glance, this one seeming to hold a warning behind an almost unwavering expression. MC knew what she was doing could end badly, but honestly, it was a risk they were willing to take. As the meeting went on, MC's foot crept higher and higher up Barbatos' leg, but they stopped when their foot was halfway up his thigh. She never broke her facade of diligent note taker, and before she knew it, the host of the meeting was giving their closing remarks. MC wanted to do one more thing, knowing that she'd already be in trouble anyway, so why not? Barbatos put on a polite smile and spoke; however, MC pushed her foot into his crotch as he did. Though almost unnoticeable, his breath hitched. As quickly as it happened, his breath evened out and he continued speaking and gathering his things to leave.

"Oh, please do not forget," The meeting's host spoke gathering everyone's attention once more. "There is a social event this evening. Wine, hors d'oeuvres, live music, and polite conversation. And please, dress for the weather; it is going to be quite warm." They reminded the room. MC's eyes lit up a bit and packed up her stuff and said her goodbyes. As they walked out of the venue, Barbatos pulled MC into a different, smaller, unused meeting room and a stern expression overtook his face.

"MC, what was that about? I asked you here to focus and take notes, not to... touch me." Barbatos said, his usual cool demeanor was completely gone. His voice dripped with an inebriating mixture of annoyance, slight embarrassment, and exasperation. MC nonchalantly shrugged her shoulders and put on a coy expression.

"I was taking notes, just like you asked. I just got a little bored and my foot started to... wander." MC said innocently. Though he tried to seem irritated and frustrated, the light blush spread across his face betrayed him. As did what MC had pressed her foot against a bit ago. Barbatos let out a sigh and rubbed a tensed middle finger and a thumb on his temple.

"MC, please just do as I ask next time. We cannot afford to embarrass Lord Diavolo." Barbatos said exasperatedly. A mischevious grin settled on MC's face.

"Next time? There'll be a next time?" MC said through a grin. Barbatos, clearly frustrated, rolled his eyes and started to leave the room with MC hot on his heels.

*.*.*.*.*.

The two made their way back to the castle to check on Diavolo. Lo and behold, the red-haired prince was not feeling any better. As much as he wanted to get up and go, he physically could not. Barbatos decided that he would have to take MC along with him once again. Slightly begrudgingly, Barbatos told MC to go back to the House of Lamentation and dress for the occasion.

"I will be at there to pick you up in approximately two hours. Can you be ready by then?" Barbatos asked escorting the human to the castle door.

"Yeah, of course! I know just what to wear. I'll see you in a few hours." MC said genuinely excited. They ran a feathery hand down Barbatos' arm and left, going to get ready for this event. A fleeting moment of regret flashed in his mind, but he pushed it out as soon as is flashed in his head.

*.*.*.*.*.

The time had finally come for Barbatos to pick up the human for the social event they had to attend. Barbatos had also asked Simeon and Luke to stay with Diavolo and tend to him while he was gone because he didn't know when they would be back. Though out of his usual style, and he didn't want to admit it, he thought he looked really nice in this outfit and it made him a bit excited for this event. When he rung the doorbell to the House of Lamentation, it only took a few seconds for Beelzebub to answer the door looking slightly confused, but a polite smile quickly replaced it.

"Hi Barbatos," The tall demon smiled.

"Hello, Beelzebub. I am here to pick up MC for the evening." Barbatos smiled back.

"Oh, come in for a minute, I'll go get her." Beel said and motioned for him to come into the foyer, which he accepted. He sipped from a water bottle as he closed the door, before looking Barbatos up and down taking in his appearance. "I like your suit." He complimented genuinely. The butler wore a blue two piece suit, a black button-up shirt, and black shoes; his hair was in its signature style, and a silver watch sat on his wrist that tied his look together.

"Thank you," Barbatos smiled genuinely as the orange-haired man turned to walk away, then disappeared around a corner. It wasn't long until the sound of a pair of heels could be heard coming down the hall. Barbatos looked up just in time to see MC come into the foyer followed closely by Asmodeus. The human was clad in an olive green wrap around skirt and top set, silver jewelry, and small black heels. Their pink hair contrasted beautifully against the color of their outfit.

Barbatos took a moment to take in her appearance; she looked amazing. A small smile overtook his face before he greeted the two people in front of him.

"Hello again, MC. Hello Asmodeus." Barbatos said.

"Hi, Barbs." MC said smiling back. Both she and Asmo took in the butler's appearance, then shared a look.

"You two look so good! Especially next to each other!" Asmo gushed. He had helped MC get ready, and let her borrow one of his perfumes to pull it all together.

"Thank you, Asmodeus. I must say, I agree that you look splendid, MC." Barbatos said kindly.

"Thanks! Would you be okay with Asmo taking our picture? I really love this outfit." MC asked. Seeing no harm in it, he obliged and posed with MC while the blond haired demon snapped a few pictures of the pair, before they turned to leave.

*.*.*.*.*.

When Barbatos and MC arrived, it felt more like a small party in a big mansion. Most of the attendants who were previously at the meeting were there along with presumably their significant others or assistants. Time goes by, and Barbatos and MC have polite conversations with everyone, munch on the mini appetizers, and enjoy a drink to the light music filling the air. Though mostly behaved, MC did steal quite a few... daring touches throughout the night. They started off small on his arm or shoulder, then they became more pointed. A feathery touch slipped under his jacket once or twice, and MC's fingers "accidentally" tapped against Barbatos' hip; those were the touches that made the blue-haired man's stomach do flips.

As calm and collected as Barbatos usually was, MC's stolen touches continuously ran through his head in a way he couldn't stop. The more he thought about the way his skin burned at MC's touch even over all of his clothes, the more he felt his will to be civilized and remember where he was, was slipping. The evening continued and MC only stole more touches, each lingering a bit longer than the last as she sipped on flutes of rare human world wine. Toward the end of the night, Barbatos had been marinating in emotional turmoil and decided that he would do something rash; he'd do something completely out of character. As a waiter passed by with a tray of demonus, Barbatos grabbed two glasses, quickly downed them, and noticed walking away.

MC had slipped away from the party down a long hall to go to the bathroom. The hall didn't have many decorations aside from a few paintings, a large oval-shaped mirror, and a table next to a door leading to a bathroom. As MC finished up, she dabbed a bit of cool water on her face and let out a sigh. They felt almost completely drained and when they next saw Barbatos, they'd ask if they could leave yet. What the human didn't expect was for Barbatos to be standing next to the table only a few feet away from them.

"Oh, just the demon I wanted to see." MC said cheerily. Barbatos let out a breathy laugh and a sly smile overtook his face.

"I'm glad I could be in the right place." He said and leaned against the table. MC stepped closer to him still wanting to tease him. All she really wanted was to see if she could break him.

"Can we leave soon? My social battery is running low." MC asked. They placed a delicate hand on Barbatos' arm; whether it was an absentminded movement or purposeful, it set his skin ablaze all the same.

"Unfortunately, we must stay for a while longer. However, I suppose we can hide away for a few minutes, if you need to." He suggested.

"Yes, please." MC said in relief. They exhaled and let out a small laugh, before turning their attention to the butler who may have gotten closer. "By the way, Asmo wasn't lying when he said you look nice. I know you always wear blue, but this shade really... brings out the green in your eyes." MC complemented. There was a look in MC's eye as she spoke that intrigued Barbatos. A dangerous mixture of hunger and want.

"Thank you, MC. Maybe that's why you can't seem to keep your hands to yourself." Barbatos joked with a hint of flintiness. A mixture of embarrassment and excitement flashed across the human's face, before it changed to a more nonchalant one.

"Ah, I can stop if it makes you uncomfortable. I'm sorry if that's the case." MC said and moved her hand off of him. Despite this, the fire inside of him spread up to his chest. He was losing his will to behave.

"Not at all. I was merely pointing it out. Though I'm not usually one for revenge, I feel like I should get you back for all those stolen touches, and what you did at this morning's meeting." Barbatos said with a smile as he got ever so closer. The two were less than a foot apart. The air was thick as MC looked up into Barbatos' eyes really noticing how much taller he was than them. He all but cornered MC against the table. His hands were right next to them, but not actually touching them, but extremely close.

"Really now?" A seductive smile slipped onto MC's face as they leaned against the table, something hot and rough bubbled up in their lower stomach.

"Yes, really." As Barbatos spoke, ever so close to MC's face, a light pink blush dusted his cheeks and ears. The combination of his massive presence, his physical height, his cologne, and the alcohol on his breath was almost dizzying. Both of their walls were crumbling, and there was almost nothing they could do about it. Barbatos placed a hand on MC's waist and pressed his fingers right above the waistband of her skirt. Her breath hitched almost silently at the sensation. Both of their eyes lidded, and their breathing became heavier; they were completely lost in each other's gaze. MC's eyes fell to Barbatos' slightly parted lips.

"Barbatos," MC's voice was breathy and her plea sounded almost like a moan. Fuck. That was all it took for him to break. He squeezed MC's waist and grabbed her face, as he hungrily closed the distance between the two. They melted into one another's touch. Their bodies pressed against each other as their breaths quickened and small sounds of pleasure escaped from them. MC's hands flew up to wrap around Barbatos' neck, pulling him as close as he could physically be. Their lips danced against one another; only heating up when Barbatos' tongue slipped past his lips and into MC's mouth. The taste of demonus was a welcome intrusion that made her moan softly.

The sound once more turned Barbatos on and he lifted MC onto the table, slotting himself between her legs. The table was relatively small, so MC's back pressed against the wall, the cold material felt amazing against their warm skin. Barbatos' hands ran up MC's sides, then one continued up to the back of her neck, while the other went back down to squeeze her hip possessively. MC, wanting to take some control, broke the kiss attacking Barbatos' neck. MC kissed and licked at his neck, careful not to leave any marks. The feeling sent shivers down his spine and he let out a shaky breath, only getting hard in his pants. Absentmindedly, the blue-haired man started grinding against MC's thigh aching for some kind of contact.

"Mmm, MC-" He moaned lowly right into MC's ear. She almost bit down on a highly visible area of his neck, but stopped herself just in time. "You're driving me crazy." He finished saying in a tone that was a half laugh and half moan. MC couldn't take it anymore, they knew they'd sound like a slut, or like they're desperate, but they didn't fucking care.

"Fuck, Barbatos." MC pleaded and moved one hand down to rub Barbatos' hard dick over his pants. His breath hitched, and he began attacking MC's neck with kisses, licks, and gently running his fangs across her skin. He nodded his head and squeezed MC's hip with one hand and ran the other up the back of her top. MC's hands went to work unbuckling Barbatos' belt. As she moved, the blue-haired man started to grope MC's breasts, in a way that could only be described as uncouth degeneracy.

MC slipped her hand down his pants, palming him over his underwear making him let out low, growl-like moans from his chest. Completely lost in pleasure, Barbatos' dominant hand slid down MC's thigh, then ducked under her skirt as he touched her gently above her panties. MC moaned against Barbatos' skin and her hips bucked against his touch. His fingers pressed and prodded against their pussy making their underwear get wetter and wetter while he got harder and harder. The tension was becoming too great for the pair, it only took a minute longer for their hands to dip below one another's underwear. Barbatos' soft skin contrasted from the hardness of his lust; however, MC's wetness complemented the delicate softness of hers.

"MC," Barbatos started. "I don't know if I can hold myself back from having my way with you any longer." His breath was shaky as his ever-present control slipped from how heated the moment was. The social was a long forgotten memory in this long, hidden away hall and all they cared about was each other.

"Then don't. Fuck me already." Not a moment after the words left the human's mouth, Barbatos' lips were on MC's. He pulled MC close by her waist and pulled the wet fabric aside before pushing his hard cock into MC's wet cunt. They moaned out in unison careful to keep their voices low as to not get caught. Barbatos shrugged off his suit jacket, leaving him looking more disheveled by the minute. They both took a moment to adjust to his size and their tightness respectively, before Barbatos began to move his hips. The pleasure radiated from their abdomens and spread throughout their bodies hotly, intensifying ten-fold wherever their bodies touched.

Low moans seeped from their mouths and mixed together with the low hum of the band playing back down the hall where someone could walk down and see them having sex out in the open so brazenly. The very thought turned MC on even more. They reached up and started to unbutton Barbatos' shirt about halfway; she couldn't not leave at least a bit of evidence. As Barbatos thrusted deeper into MC gradually becoming more rough, MC put her arms in his shirt and ran her nails gently down his back making his back arch and his cock push deeper into the human.

"F-fuck!" The blue-haired demon moaned out a bit louder than anticipated. "MC, you're going to get us in trouble if you keep that up." His breath was hoarse and unsteady.

"Should I stop?" MC asked in a faux innocent voice mimicking the one she used after the meeting that morning. Barbatos didn't know why, but his face burned once again, and his cock twitched inside of MC.

"Absolutely not." Barbatos replied and began to kiss her again. His thrusts got faster, and MC dug her nails into Barbatos' back making him moan into her mouth and transform into his demon form. Without a moment of hesitation, Barbatos used his tail to play with MC's clit making her moan harder into his mouth and her hands scratched into Barbatos' skin again. The intense pleasure mixed with the atmosphere of everything going on around them makes them both cum. Barbatos quickly pulls out and cum on her thighs as he covered MC's mouth muffling her orgasm. Despite both of them already riding out their orgasms, Barbatos' tail did not let up on MC's sensitive and puffy clit. Through their continued stimulation, MC's toes began to curl in their shoes and they reached down to pump Barbatos' dick even more.

His legs started to shake with the overstimulation matching MC's already trembling body. Both of their movements slow to a stop. Barbatos pretty much leaned down on MC as they caught their breath together, and Barbatos' horns and tail seem to disappear as they calm down. Barbatos fixed his clothes, then ducked into the bathroom to get a damp paper towel and helped MC clean up. After they were both completely dressed, they walked back into the main area where everyone else was. The only reason no one was suspicious was because their whole little rendezvous only took fifteen minutes.

*.*.*.*.*.

About an hour later, Barbatos and MC were saying their goodbyes to the guests as they leave and they decide to leave as well. Luckily, the walk from the venue to the House of Lamentation was approximately 20 minutes long. MC suggested walking rather than calling a car and having their night end in five minutes. The two chatted happily as they strolled down the dim, sparsely populated streets, only lit by streetlights and the few faint stars that could be seen in the devildom sky. Despite both of their calm and happy demeanors, the events from earlier played over in their heads. The touches, the kisses, the heat, the atmosphere; it almost fogged their thoughts. Those feelings seemingly leaking from the back of their heads, slowly dotting its way into their current conversation. While Barbatos was speaking, MC suddenly let out a small laugh which he met with an inquisitive look.

"Did I say something funny?" Barbatos asked half amused.

"No, sorry. I was just thinking. I never thought I'd hear the Barbatos, butler of the Devildom's prince say 'fuck'." MC said holding back another small laugh. Barbatos immediately knew that they were talking about, and a light blush spread across his face.

"Well, I never thought I would abandon such an important event to indulge in such acts. Even if it was for less than twenty minutes." Barbatos replied. The more the earlier scenes played in his head, the more his blush spread, but stayed light and airy.

"Damn, just the thought of me is enough to make you blush, huh? It's a shame we had to rush." MC teased and linker her arm in his, her fingers brushing his hip once again.

"MC... Barbatos said in a tone of both warning and slight embarrassment.

"What? I didn't do anything." MC grinned and hugged his arm into her chest.

"MC, I'm only going to tell to tell you this once: you don't want to start something you can't finish." The tall man warned again. Once again, he was in an internal struggle for control over his actions. It wouldn't be wise to lose his composure and do such unbecoming acts where anyone can see. It wasn't late, so people could easily see if they did do something out on the street. MC let out a snort of laughter before leaning close to his ear, and speaking again.

"I think I finished what I started when you came all over my thighs in the hallway." MC's voice was low and sultry as they spoke. Barbatos' breath came out shakily, a familiar fluttering in his stomach told him all he needed to know.

"If I'm not mistaken, I did all of the work." Barbatos said and freed his arm from MC's grasp. He wrapped his arm tightly around MC's waist and let his thumb rub small circles on their exposed skin. He pulled them close and spoke into their ear. "You just laid there on your back, looking pretty, and taking me in so well." His voice deepened when he spoke, an air of gruffness replacing his usual honey-like voice. MC bit her lip to keep herself from moaning; a familiar pang pulled in MC's pelvis and they knew their underwear was going to get wet again.

"Really, now? Fine, how about I put in some work then?" MC asked and trailed her hand from Barbatos' lower outer thigh, upward and inward. She avoided his crotch and instead finished trailing her hand up the center of his thigh, then over to the buckle of his belt. The butler's breathing became shallow and his cock started to stiffen at her touch. Damn this human's affect on him.

"Oh? And how would you do that?" Barbatos asked with a mischevious grin as he looked down into MC's eyes. MC went up on her tip toes and kissed Barbatos on the lips briefly, before looking around the empty street, and pulling Barbatos down a dim alley. Once they were more towards the back, MC pushed the demon against one of the walls and caressed his face gently.

"Like this." MC said and kissed Barbatos deeply. His hands greedily gripped and kneaded MC's ass and thighs as her hands slid down his body. Barbatos' tongue found its way into MC's mouth, deepening the kiss and making the human moan lightly. MC unbuttoned the butler's suit jacket and ran her hands down his clothed chest, taking it upon herself to squeeze his chest like he had squeezed hers; a shiver ran up his spine and he let out a shaky moan. MC kept kissing Barbatos and started to unbutton his shirt. After the black button up hung loosely off his torso, MC pulled away; a thin strand of saliva connected their lips, before falling into nothingness. MC kissed along Barbatos' jaw, biting softly every now and then as one of her hands continued rubbing his chest, and the other went down to sinfully grope his hard dick over his pants.

"Shit, MC-" The man moaned out. His pleasure only intensified when MC started kissing lower. She kissed down his neck, to his chest, leaving a bite mark only he and MC would know about. A slew of low but salacious swears and moans leaked from their mouths, drifting into the air, and against skin respectively. MC kept going lower, making her way to his stomach, then lower stomach. They got on their knees, and looked up at Barbatos through thick lashes. MC began tugging at Barbatos' belt and their eyes met; heat rose and radiated off the two.

MC opened Barbatos' pants and pulled out his hard dick. She licked up the shaft, teasing his tip with their tongue and watching Barbatos' face become more red and contort. MC kept teasing the demon, until she couldn't take it anymore. The human took as much of his cock as she could before it hit the back of her throat causing her to gag. The vibration made Barbatos moan and grasp the human's face. Gently, he caressed MC's face as her head bobbled up and down his cock, not wanting to look away from such a beautifully lewd sight.

Whether it was because of how intimate the moment was, or how hot the moment was, it didn't make a difference as Barbatos transformed into his demon form. As he watch MC, his mouth watered; he wanted their- no, he craved their taste. Reluctantly, he guided their mouth off of him, and spoke.

"Get up." He commanded in a tone completely soaked in lust. The human complied, but before she could ask why, Barbatos was lifting her up and putting her legs over his shoulders. He leaned her against the wall he was just against, and moved her skirt to the side. He kept one hand on MC's ass half for support and half for his own pleasure. With his other hand, he pulled at one side of her underwear and popped the seam completely and cleanly so he had quick and easy access to her tight, juicy twat.

"Barbatos!" MC called out in surprise. He looked her in the eye and smiled that damn calm, polite smile that he wore everyday and reassured the human that everything was under control.

"Don't worry, dear. I can sew them back up. I'm careful in everything I do." Barbatos said before kissing MC's thighs getting closer and closer to her dripping wet pussy. When he started kissing and licking their sensitive cunt, MC let out a shuddered moan and leaned their head back in pleasure as much as they could. The demon lapped and licked and sucked, massaging MC's ass and hips, now with both hands. Moans leaked from both of their mouths softly and drifted off in the evening air. MC thought it couldn't feel better as their hands held Barbatos' face in admiration, but somehow, he did the impossible; with just enough pressure to make an orgasm shoot through their body, Barbatos ran his teeth over her puffy clit. A high pitched gasp-like moan erupted from MC's chest. Her hands gripped Barbatos' hair in pleasure causing his dick to twitch in response.

MC's hips jerked into Barbatos' mouth where his movements slowed. A combination of spit and juices covered Barbatos' mouth and MC's upper thighs. Slowly, he let the human down and made sure they didn't lose their balance. He hugged the human to his chest and kissed their neck. MC's back pressed against Barbatos' chest as he ran his hands over their body.

"You're so fucking beautiful, MC. I don't know how I held back from fucking you for so long." The butler said against MC's skin. She moaned softly in response before speaking.

"Ugh, shut up and fuck me, butler man." MC said with a dangerous mix of humor and hot fervor in her voice. One of Barbatos' arms wrapped around MC's waist and pulled her tight against him, his still out dick rubbing against their skirt. His other hand slid up MC's tied top, squeezing and kneading her breasts hungrily. It took almost no time for Barbatos to bunch MC's skirt up by her waist and rub his cock against her pussy. The demon's precum mixed with the human's pussy juices and made a delicious squelch when he pushed into them. They both moaned out in pleasure as Barbatos' hand not holding MC up by the waist moved between their tits and their throat- not quite choking them.

His thrusts started off slow, going completely in, then almost completely out; his hot breath fanned over the back of MC's neck making her shutter in pleasure. Gradually, his speed increased, and MC reached down to play with herself. Barbatos saw and grabbed MC's arms and put them behind their back, holding their wrists to keep them in place.

"No, you don't get to do anymore work." The blue-haired man said shortly. His teeth grazed the back of MC's neck before he kissed and sucked right at the base of their neck. The combination of his throbbing manhood in her tight cunt, his sheer dominating size just engulfing her in warmth, and his wandering hand moving from their breasts to their throat, was beyond intoxicating. The human almost didn't realize how suddenly their orgasm bubbled up in their uterus. Almost. MC's moans became rapid and desperate before hot wet squirt started gushing out of MC's twat squeezing around Barbatos. By some miracle, the hot liquid missed Barbatos' legs, and only the last few drops ran down MC's.

"FUCK! I-I've never..." MC moaned out, their voice trailing off and turning into a low, growl-like mewl. A familiar heat all but clawed at Barbatos' groin, he was not going to last much longer. Hell, how could he with MC all undone in front of him. The man was going to cum on MC's legs again, but she pulled away and instead got on her knees in front of him. She started stroking and sucking his cock once more bringing him to the edge, then over. Barbatos shuddered and moaned as his hot sticky white cum shot all over MC's face. His tail wrapped around their waist possessively as he rode out his orgasm. His moans slowed to deep breaths as he regained his composure and looked down at the human with his bodily fluids on her face.

"You make me weak, MC." Barbatos said fixing his pants then squatting to be eye-level with MC. As he reached into his jacket to get a handkerchief to help MC clean up, he noticed MC take out their phone and take a selfie. He would have protested, but there was just something so utterly endearing that he just let them get away with it. "Don't show that to anyone, darling." Barbatos asked and started wiping the cum off of her face.

"I can promise that almost no one will see this. The only person I can't guarantee won't see this picture is Asmo, but he's immaculate at keeping secrets." MC said, a smile forming on her face as Barbatos moves the cloth across her face so gently. Barbatos thought about it for a moment, then sighed out a small laugh.

"Fine. If you think he's trustworthy and he accidentally sees that picture, it's okay. However, I want you my dear to be anything but a secret. If word gets out that we are... close, then so be it." Barbatos said and finished cleaning her up as best as he could. He helper her stand, and kissed her forehead while she fixed her clothes before they continued on their walk to the House of Lamentation. He dropped them off, then made the short walk back to the Demon Lord's castle planning his next outing with the beautiful MC.

*.*.*.*.*. (A.N) No smut for a month so I made this extra long. Also MC's outfit is by Charm_Others on Instagram. Love y'all and stay safe <3

[xxplastic-cubexx]

it doesnt need to be said but its genuinely so funny how at-the-hip charles and erik are in krakoa like they really had the green light- the OBLIGATION- to be as obnoxiously close to each other as possible and abused that right to the fullest extent

[yikes-ajax-thats-sad]

"BPD makes you have low self worth" well apparently not because my brain still insists that things that have nothing to do with me surely are because of me :/

[sysig]

Coding woes (Patreon)

[transmechanicus]

Kind of hard to ask as anon

But you doing ok?

Need to vent?

Hi very kind and thoughtful of you to ask, i am doing mmmmm suboptimal but i do not need to vent to a person per se, so much as i need to say absolutely insane shit in my tags and have everyone pretend not to see <3

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

[the-casbah-way]

even though i really love what hrt is doing to me it has made me so self conscious because i know my body is changing more visibly now and i don't like the idea that people who know me very well will be able to see that. i just hate the idea of people looking at me. and i worry that the people i care about will like me less the more they look at me because i'm ugly

[adxmanial]

—

[seventh-district]

.

[critterchitters-closedcaptions]

trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.

vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍