#is attention they will not get from me
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i really hate what he did to me. i was never a jealous person. i was trusting. i never really cared.
he made me feel worthless, paranoid, unlovable, jealous and now im obsessing.
i dont want to be like this, its not healthy.
#i can’t get it out of my head#any attentuon they’re giving to someone else#is attention they will not get from me#this is how i have to heal#i need to absolutely know i am their no1#it’s pathetic really#im going to be alone forever 🤣
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been replaying the Portal series I think this is where its heading
#i haven't drawn in like. half a month. which listen i know i don't post much here but i do draw a lot#i have another blog. but also sometimes i just don't post things. i draw for myself#just got burnt out from working on an animation final 😔#so anyway. eased myself back in with a silly comic about portal#my irl saw my shitty sketch and thought glados was painting chell which is very funny to me.#chelldos#but like. unrequited. glados is obsessed with chell. chell is not having a good time#portal#chell#GlaDOS#GlaD0S#my art#og post#1k#5k#10k#20k#edit: i made this post almost a year ago and it haunts me. theres a typo. chell is out of character.#because i couldn't come up with a good reason for her to be there in the first place#and this was a shitty ms paint replicating drawing that i did just to get back into drawing#i didn't think it would gain much attention#i was Wrong#anyway someone in the comments said this is what happens when you speedrun thats an infintely better setup for the punchline#EDIT 2: ok i fixed it fuck you
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hey btw if you're in the USA at 2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.
if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.
additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.
i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."
"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.
#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!"#to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid''#like..... gets me#yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai#and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that.#you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time.#dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem.#these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly.#they arent meant to be fun and exciting.#OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off.#but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X#dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was.#i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill.#the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT.#like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU#for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...
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tarpit site.
#personal#delete later#for context a tweet i made in the middle of the night blew the fuck up and brought the attention of anime fans who've been#harassing and hassling me about my big factual blunder for an entire day straight#“ok i'll apologize” “bro it's not that serious.”#“you're right it's not that serious“ ”why won't you just admit that you're wrong and apologize!“#i'm not going crazy right. i feel like i'm getting manipulated into thinking i must've been wrong#it's crazy how twitter hate will trick you into believing saying something someone else disagrees with is a moral failing#sorry i haven't seen frieren i guess but what's it to you. i wasn't making a claim or statement#also because nobody has gotten this in the original post i wasn't talking about the quality of animation i'm talking about solid drawing#which is a very specific principle of animation. dandandan has really good solid drawing wherein all the characters are animated#with realistic and proportional 3d depth. newsflash but trigger doesn't prioritize solid drawing in their animation and that's fine#it's an aesthetic choice and has ties to production limits. none of this is a big deal. this is all so stupid lol#i've dealt with worse and more annoying weebs though it's fine i'll put on my clown nose twitter needs their stupid guy for the day#oh btw at the end of the day this doesn't matter. it'll be over by tomorrow. all that's happening is petty angry emotions.#so please don't involve yourself by jumping into the argument and prolonging this shit#i'm about to go on a date with tulli after being apart for a month this is the furtherest thing from my mind rn
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happy pride to all queer children of immigrants
patreon
#muertodraws#queer art#queer comic#lgbtq#pride#trans artist#qtpoc#trans art#transgender#transmasc#mlm#if youre a queer child of immigrants you deserve free lifelong therapy#this comic was originally going to be a “i feel like a freak” cuz im trans and people dont know what to do with me#and then it turned into like. oh god this experience is compounded by your complicted relationship to uhh well#being mexican and a child of immigrants#i was originally going to add a quote from a jose marti poem but idk i didnt want this to get too long#i think if i did that i would prolly attract the attention of latine purists and nationalists lmfaooo#i already have people who dont even believe im mexican much less a child of immigrants much less a man#the most common hate i get now is that im a confused white woman gringa who isnt latin american#besides the transphobia im just like. have you ever heard of a diaspora#anyway#hope someone enjoys this
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💖 Day 3.5 is now available! 💖
For the last couple of months, only Server Boosters had access to the 3.5 update... Buuuuut now it's available for everyone to play in the 14DWY Discord — and soon itch.io once I'm happy with the QA and state of the game — so please don't feel pressured to join unless you want to!!
The full devlog + even more screenshots are under the cut ^^
What's been added to the 3.5 version?
📺 Streamer Mode!
I've been told that it's difficult to stream and monetise age-restricted videos on YouTube and Twitch, so I added an option to remove the sexual content and strong language used in the demo.
Now y'all can invite Ren into your bed for cuddles without putting your streamer career on the line /silly /lh
This won't affect the 18+ rating or dark themes/elements of the game, however! Although Streamer Mode will prevent you from seeing any "gruesome" CGs in the future, most of the core elements of the game will still be tied to the choices and decisions you make. So you won't miss out on the overall experience by using streamer mode!!
⚙️ Custom Pronouns!
It only took me one entire year to get around to it, but you can finally choose your own preferred pronouns (or use a set of pronouns instead)... At the cost of being able to change them mid-game ^^;
Since the original pronoun screen wouldn't update until a new scene was displayed, I temporarily disabled the feature. But once I find a workaround, I'll bring it back!
💗 Choose how others perceive you!
You can now choose how the cast and narration perceive you! Originally, the narration was kept strictly gender-neutral (outside of pronouns and genitalia picked by the player), but this will soon change in future updates.
For more clarity: you don't get to choose the words specifically, but you can choose between masculine, feminine, and androgynous terms!
📋 Separate top and bottom genitalia!
You can now choose your tatas and pps separately! >:3
Alongside that, you can also choose your preferred body type!
I removed the "both" genitalia option because a few players still assumed it was an obscure version of "intersex". That wasn't my intention and I don't want to mislead anyone, so I took it out for now ^^;
I also didn't want to include a screenshot of the new genitalia choices in action (because it's NSFW), so y'all get the same character menu screen for the nth time instead lmao
📱 Relationship Screen Overhaul!
You can now change your own status for more immersion, and long-term Server Boosters will eventually be able to submit and use their own icon within the game as well!
Stalking finding your friends has now become easier by using "Buddy Maps"; a new app that allows you to see the location of all the cast members!
I want to offer players more incentive to check the relationship screen since they tend to miss the status updates, so hopefully this might help ;v;
It also says it "updates every few hours" so folks don't go overboard and check every 5 seconds to see where Ren is gdsghf (also keep in mind that he's a hacker lol)
🖤 Additional Scenes Update!
Day 2 received a brand new CG!!!!! Originally, I planned on only adding a few CGs sporadically throughout the game, but it didn't feel right to leave Day 2 so... empty... so I added a brand new CG to (hopefully) make things feel more balanced and natural!
If you decline Teo's offer on Day 3, Leon will now call and try to convince you to reconsider. However, players are still allowed to decline, and if they do, they'll reach a dead end.
After listening to feedback on itch, I changed some of the dialogue during Days 1-3 to make it seem more consistent! They're only small changes though, so it's honestly not worth looking for sdgjssga
🎶 Updated BGM and SFX!
I wanted to try out a different style of music to see if it fits the vibe of 14DWY more! The BGM features more acoustics to suit the "beachy" theme of Corland Bay, though I made a conscious effort to include piano elements as well to stay true to the original!!
I figured it'd be better to give players a live example before I make a poll (to see if they prefer the change or not) and publish it to Itch.
Some new SFX have also been added, though it's very minimal and honestly not that noticeable.
How to download and play the update?
(warning: clicking on the following links will open Discord!!) To download the Day 3.5 update, simply join the 14DWY Discord server, verify your age, and visit the "14dwy-updates" channel!
Alternatively, you can also wait until the update is publicly released on Itch to play it as well!! (It normally gets released shortly after a round of QA testing/getting feedback from the server, though I may release it earlier if I feel like it hehe ^^)
Enjoy!!
#14 days with you#14dwy#💖 — 14 days with queue.#🖤 — updates.#🖤 — spoilers.#I'm not gonna say much about my current doxxing situation because I've got it under control now + it's being handled privately#Plus I don't wanna give it/the people involved any unnecessary attention. I just wanna announce the update and Get Back To It™️#(''it'' bein the grind 💪 It never stops lmao /silly)#OG followers will also know that these topics aren't the vibe I normally have on this blog (or any of my accounts); so I don't think I'll—#—make ANOTHER public post about the situation and bring more attention to it (when I just want everything to be over and put to rest ^^;)#However I also don't want people to think that I'm... ignoring?? the situation entirely (because gettin doxxed is a very endangering thing)#So I DO want to quickly acknowledge it here and say that it's all currently handled + I'm safe and okay + this won't stop me from—#—continuing to work on 14DWY (and other future projects). I also don't want to give these awful people more power and incentive to continue#—this kind of pathetic behaviour; so the less attention and encouragement being shown will ultimately be better in the long run :3#Aaaaaanways!! 😮💨#My other accounts will be restored shortly and my askbox will be opened once I feel comfortable. I'll get around to following folks—#—again in my own time; so please don't feel offended if I unfollowed you during a moment of vulnerability and anxiety!!#This is all EXTREMELY overwhelming and scary for someone with SAD/AvPD; and I /gen can't handle seeing it all over my timeline ;v;#Sorry this got ranty and personal again hjdsgjsdh T_T I said I wouldn't say much; so I'll shut up now hehe#🖤 — shut up sai.
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artificial intelligence ghost
#zeno's art#pokemon#hatsune miku#pokemiku#ghost miku#project voltage#vocaloid#vocal synths#i'm very proud of this piece despite its faults#i learned from “bunny blast-off” and payed extra close attention to values#so the end result's grayscale is very close to the plan version. i hope that shows#in total this piece took 12 hours probably because of the three value layouts and three sketches - a bit overkill for me but it went well#if i redid this piece i'd like to use more vibrant colors especially for her hair#but in the end i'm very proud of it. my favorite details are probably the posters in the background and miku's face and eyes#this was supposed to be posted on halloween but i want to get it out now. maybe (hopefully) i'll have a seperate piece to post on that day!
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I haven't seen anybody post the full Riddle Chain yet (including Silas Birchtree) so here you go :)
I didn't find any of these codes myself by the way! I'm not sure who to credit for the rest of them, but I did get the Silas Birchtree code from @dismissivedestroyer (sorry for tagging you ^_^" if you don't want to be tagged let me know and i can edit the post). You can also get the answer using the code "STOD EHT TCENNOC"
(SPOILERS BELOW)
RIDDLE (would you like to play a game) > YES (what's Mcgucket's favorite soda?) > MOUNTAIN DONT (what's a medieval homonym?) > LYRE LIAR (the 20th ingredient of Anti-Cipherzing Tonic?) > HAROLDS RAMBLINGS (how is clown repellant made?) > UNION MADE (Bill's govt file number?) > 29121239168518 (who comes from Zimtrez 5?) > GREBLEY HEMBERDRECK (what's on Bill's flag?) > 3466554 (what leaves a thin line in the snow?) > TINSEL SNAKE (the 6th option on Bill's editing software?) > TORTURE MENTALLY (name an unpronouncable wizard) > XGQRTHX (where do Tri Angels come from?) > 333SUNDAPPLELANECOZYCREEKIL6071494611 (Bill Cipher's Lawyer?) > CAESARATBASHVIGNERE [or] MULTI LEVEL MARK (who defeated Silas Birchtree--?) > EMMALINE BUTTERNUBBINS (you've earned a treat! enter 'DISPENSE MY TREAT' to download) > DISPENSE MY TREAT
The 'treat' you get is under the cut
"BILL FILES DO NOT OPEN"
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#im not really sure what to tag this haha#does this mean we have all the codes now?#probably not right??#apparently theres this super rare thing you get from using “alex” or “alex hirsch” a bunch of times but i havent gotten it yet#i tried but i accidentally closed the tab and had to start over#also it was just getting really laggy#someone pleeeeaase post the pictures in high quality if you get it#ill be forever in your debt#gravity falls#book of bill#the book of bill#tbob#tbob spoilers#the book of bill spoilers#gravity falls spoilers#thisisnotawebsitedotcom#thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com#bill cipher#i feel bad tagging so much but i want people to see this#silas birchtree#billcipher#bill cypher#no offense but how do you misspell his name its literally everywhere#ok have fun :))#turtle talks#long post#just added the silas birchtree riddle picture to catch attention better dont mind me
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#polls#personally i dont like it but thats only because i dont like fandom. the type of stuff that gets the most attention#in fandom usually just annoys me idk. how to explain it in a way that wont come off as me saying#fanfic or whatever is evil its just the fact that it just bombards alot of the conversations?#i prefer it when the thing i like has 10 fans and theyre all on one message board or forum#like for example mtvs downtown is getting popular but apart from annoying#'me and the mid nerd guy i copped by being weird and sexy' posts its not awful....#but then smth like... clone high or smth i suddenly cant remember ppl just got so annoying abt that show??#like i cant stand it i dont even bother watching it anymore plus its just weird to me now like i can't watch it regardless#im just rambling but personally i do not like it. like i dont want what i like to get a revival#i dont want anything new! i just want to enjoy the thing and move on 😭#fandom seems to prioritize shipping and memes over evaluating or simply just enjoying something!#this goes for anything. music film tv books....
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WHEEEEEE
#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#emu otori#i drew this insteabd of payong attention to class. Sorry.#And am posting it while i wait for the bus. I ha e sleey disease#SLEEPY.#emu otori from um . fortntie#Rhebusihesjehr THE BUS IS HERE BYYE#edit ok im back waiting for my transfer BROTHER. THE ANNIVIERYUAEYH it got me so fucked up prsk you crazy son of a gun#I THINK THE NEW OUTFITS ARE RLLY CUTE MIKU SOOOO KITTY#im almost done with all of my commsni dont think i will open them again this semester. or next. summer. Im sho tired#my assignments r fun but theyre like big. Theyrbe large#my prof said he was gonna make us make fur/sonas for an assignment hut didnt want to get fired. dont be a coward#proseka autism is killinng me i cant lie WHY IS DARKNESS FESTA TIERING SO FUCKING CRAZY#IVE NEVER EVER SEEN THE 10K CUTOFF REACH A MILLION POINTS ON EN. USUALLY WE SLACK SO HARD. COME ON#im so sleepy and have things to do please sotp it AND CURTAINCALL IM GONNA BE SICK I CANT TRHJNK ABOUT IT
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alhaitham is the guy every aunty in the neighbourhood wants to set their daughter up with and you can't change my mind
stable job, good income, his own house, no siblings and parents so no in-laws, tall, handsome, good character, keeps to himself, can cook, attractive, tall, well read and well educated, et cetera et cetera
yes I wrote tall twice
This is canon. (His book told me)
I like to think that the aunties had this revelation after Alhaitham was appointed as the Acting Grand Sage, because before that, his existence seemed to be verified primarily through Kaveh and also for the ‘how did we never notice such son-in-law material right in front of us??’ factor.
If this was anyone else, their egos would be past Celestia (as becoming the most eligible bachelor in Sumeru in the span of a month is no small feat) but Alhaitham, the man that he is, responds to the attention with his signature nonchalance. It's hard to determine whether that is humbleness or another form of arrogance altogether.
#in the middle of writing for the ratio but i just.. miss alhaihai so much ;—;#imagine the amount of envy that you'd get if you were in a relationship with him from before the whole archon quest. lucky you.#but alhaitham's exceptional ability to be content with the little things make him extremely loyal so i don't think he'd ever be swayed by-#-the attention#anyway ty zuri for giving me the chance to ramble about him#(and yes his height needs to be emphasized)#he's too perfect#alhaitham#al haitham#alhaitham brainrot#al haitham brainrot#alhaitham x reader#al haitham x reader#genshin impact x reader#teabutmakeitazure
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Prompt 203
Another Hydra prompt! Because I am enjoying the designs I’ve made lol. And perhaps it’s a bit inspired by @radiance1 ‘s different dragon prompts too.
So they’ve succeeded! They’ve managed to combine their powers- with a bit of shapeshifting helped along by so many ghost allies- and become a giant duck-you dragon! Well, originally they were going to do something else, but they couldn’t agree on an animal, so dragon it was!
And how mighty they are! They’re giant, absolutely massive- dwarfing the couple of skyscrapers still in Amity. Damages via ghost attacks and general sparring made it where people really didn’t want to rebuild those types of buildings.
But anyway, dragon! Them! They’re absolutely stunning! And did they mention powerful? Because boy oh boy, are they powerful. The GIW’s guns do practically nothing against their combined might, and barriers shatter before them!
The uh, issue is that they erm… can’t turn back. Which is fine, they’ve all sort of outlived most of their generation- thank you possessions and ecto-contamination, it’s just a tiny bit of an adjustment. But really it’s not too bad, and someone needs to stop the GIW from trying to poke their heads into Amity. Like it’s been a solid couple of generations, it’s time to stop, thanks.
Actually they’ve been a bit quiet. Meh, that surely isn’t a problem. Probably. Honestly they’re all going to use the opportunity to sprawl out where the school yard once was, their favorite place to sun their scales. Huh. Usually more people are around now that they think about it- or really, as Paulina points out, sharpening her fangs on one of the rocks.
…
How long had they been sleeping, because it couldn’t have been that long. One of them was always awake, they slept in shifts after all! Yet there are things missing now as they patrol the skies, both Wes and Tucker pointing out specific buildings that the others didn’t particularly notice usually that now lay empty.
Hm.
Oh. That is a… strong barrier there. A really strong barrier actually. Pfft, they can take it! They’ve shredded every barrier together before- Ow.
…
Okay this might be a bit of a problem. Shit.
You want a general size reference? :P
#Dcxdp#Dpxdc#Prompts#The Class Pulls a Tiamat#The GIW have been working on a way to cage the Very Dangerous Ghost Dragon that just seemed to Appear one day according to their predecesso#Yes it’s been a good hundred years or so since the DP series happenings#Also yes they’re poly & sharing a body#They can talk telepathically & share some abilities or dozen#”Danny this is definitely all from your luck I swear” “It could also be Wes’ y’know” “Don’t drag me into this”#Big angry dragon king/queen (as Amity started calling them) throwing a fit at the barrier they can’t get through#Which gets some people’s attention both inside said barrier and outside it#This includes a few heroes and people who Should NOT have learned about a Giant Hydra
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I find it fascinating how every single one of my health issues can be mistaken for laziness
#tw ableism#->#'ugh why doesn't she pay attention to classes?? lazy' -> I'm ADHD/2e. your lesson isn't interesting enough.#'why does your table have wheels? why do you have to work from your bed? that's clearly an excuse to be able to lay down wnvr you want'->#there's something unidentified happening with my back that makes me unable to sit straight for long periods of time and it hurts LIKE HELL.#'why did you only get up at noon? that's such a lazy behavior' -> my circadian rhythm is nocturnal. I'm only truly awake past midnight and+#+it has been like that since the day i was born. mom had to stay up with baby me until 3am#tw fatphobia#->->#'why are you so fat? are you eating healthy? are you going to the gym? smaller portions girrrrllllll' ->#first of all go to hell. but anyway i actively enjoy eating healthy food#i love salads.#and yes i go to the gym regularly. almost every day.#but i have a very fun thing called PCOS and it messes up with my hormones in ways no professional could help me yet 👍#but again. go to hell.#nonsims#non sims
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Bit of a weird question, but what is your overall least favorite thing about MLP? 
Sparity.
#magicalgrimm#ask me#there’s a later season episode (post spike getting wings) that Tulli and I could not finish because it was so awful#where rarity’s feeling lonely without spike who’s grown up and moved on from his crush on her#so she gets extremely clingy and manipulatey to get this. teenage boy to pay attention and worship her again#and rarity gets visibly jealous of spike spending time with another teenage dragon girl#it’s extremely extremely creepy. by FAR rarity’s absolute worst rock bottom moment#actual textbook groomer behavior#and even worse the episode kinda shits on rarijack where rarity tried to replace spike with applejack in helping her#but aj fails and fucks things up and isn’t right for the job. so the episode implies spike is a better match with rarity than applejack#it’s just all sorts of wrong eugh.#sparity just sucks so bad I can’t believe a good chunk of bronies still ship them or consider them a viable ship#I’m fine with spike having a kid crush on rarity it happens with kids#but the more the writers just kept teasing and toying and baiting it. overstayed its welcome#especially because they have no chemistry. spike doesn’t have a reason for liking rarity other than “hot woman in her mid-20s’
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it is completely one hundred percent baffling to me that any of the foxes would come away from witnessing neil and andrew's reunion in baltimore with the opinion that their relationship was just hate fucking . like my brother in christ are you blind
#andrew was FERAL .#he fucking choked KEVIN like COME ON#and he was like RACING into the room to see neil and#he was all like *tugs neil's hoodie to get his attention* *threatens anyone who tried to come close to them (abby)*#he was all like 'i dont trust them to give you back.' come on man .#and neil was looking at andrew . most definitely Like That. when he was talking to abby#neil was all battered and bruised from barely dodging a fucking death sentence and he sees andrews partly red eye and thats#the first thing he talks about#*lightly taps a thumb against the bruise at andrews eye* i didnt know theyd staged a riot#they were all like Looking at each other and ..... idk i am not explaining this well enough but .#you don't need me to. you all read it#it was So Fucking Obvious my god#im crying bc even neil thought nicky wasnt far from the truth at that point#like he could not have been more incorrect istg .#aftg#andreil#neil josten#andrew minyard#all for the game#mi ne
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save a turkey this thanksgiving.
stuff a chubby brunette with an attitude problem instead 🤍
#hi it’s me!#stuff me in case yall didn’t get the hint#do i ‘borrow’ half my posts from other people in the internet? maybe#i’m not that funny#but i still wanna share it with people#emmies thoughts#daddy's good girl#attention wh0r3#daddy’s babygirl#daddy’s brat#older men do it better#big tiddy gf#big tiddy wife#curvy and cute#thick and juicy
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