#is a bhaalspawn

[the-marshmallow]

Gods, you're beautiful.

[snarfflarf]

Asking BG3 characters to pick you up pads

[taygra5shaon]

how it should have happened...

Fuck cazaldor.💀

[wetsocksinbed]

Baldurs Gate 3 is so wild when you realise how vastly different the game is depending on if you choose Tav or Dark Urge

Dark Urge Playthrough: you’re the child of Bhaal, but unlike the Bhaalspawn, you are created solely by Bhaal himself. The first true child of Bhaal. The daughter of one of your father’s previous Bhaalspawn turns on you, attacks you and tries to kill you. In your dying state, she infects you with a parasite so that you’ll die an incredibly humiliating death, and become her slave.

By some miracle you end up on the same nautiloud ship as a Sharron Cleric who happens to to be carrying a gith artefact that contains Baldur himself. Baldur, who was made a mind flayer and is now calling himself the Emperor, realises there’s an incredibly powerful Bhaalspawn on the ship, and that he can use them to his advantage. The power you have will help him destroy Gortash. Of course he picks you, it makes so much sense.

On your way to Baldurs Gate you find out through an unsent letter that you used to be into Gortash. When you get to Baldurs Gate, the man you used to fuck turns out to be an absolute loser and with horror you realise he is still into you. It’s okay though, he’s very easy to kill.

You end up facing off against Orin, your niece, and kill her. Your father appears to you and offers you the chance to become his Slayer. On the high chance you turn him down, he murders you in front of your loved ones, and leaves you to rot.

Then Jergal, the actual Lord of the End of Everything, the original God of Death, who was the very being that turned you father into a God all that time ago, who’s been in your camp for weeks pretending to be this undead scribe called Withers, appears next to your corpse and brings you back to life, basically adopts you, states that he will protect you from Bhaal, and announces that as long as he lives, you will never die. You’re essentially immortal.

Tav Playthrough: you’re a random nobody that was unlucky enough to get kidnapped by Mind Flayers. The Emperor must pick one of the many idiots on the ship to be his pawn. He sees Tav and thinks “ugh, yeah this one will do”.

[fuckitwebhaal]

When Astarion says “I prayed to all the gods. They never answered” and Wyll says “the only thing a god’s ever given me is a cold shoulder” and when Minthara says “there are no gods left for me”

if you even get it.

[metal-junk]

patch 7 has revived my bg3 brain rot

We’re so back

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Astarion: Little girls who kiss frogs expect them to turn into you.

Wyll: Oh come on. I’m not that good-looking.

Gale: Yeah, you are.

Karlach: You kind of are.

[lazylittledragon]

so how about that durge

[gothicspork]

Medicine proficiency by default? Plague Doctor Dark Urge

[klaineka]

You think durge ever got stuck with babysitting the feral sister?

(Oh yeah durge cape outfit design is from @galgant pre-avernus comics)

[excaryder]

The Great(ly disapointed) Three

and their (useless) chosen

choices.

[panksage]

I’ve made my own version of this meme for all the durges out there celebrating Pride.

[taygra5shaon]

he taste like shit. 🩸

Fix-it AU

one comment made me think what would happen if Astarion brought my Durge to Cazaldor before the main story.

[kawareo]

Can't throw daddy's name around to get what you want all the time, Durge, put away the dramatic lighting

Am a big supporter of the 'Durge likes gnolls while Enver doesn't' headcanon

[moonselune]

She made them a sticker chart <3

(It’s got sticky bloody fingerprints on it)

Inspired by this and @herleaf ‘s comment x

[metal-junk]

i like ur funny words, magic man

the idea that probably one of the most dangerous people in faerûn can become good after falling for a pathetic wizard is fucking hilarious to me. also i am an avid defender of gale and i want to make VERY CLEAR he isn’t supposed to be mansplaining bhaal to a bhaalspawn here, that’s just the only info i could actually write a significant amount of. i’m the one mansplaining here not gale i love gale