#incorrect record of ragnarok

[incorrect-record-of-ragnarok]

Random Spectator: I love you, Emperor Qin! Qin: [points] And I love you, random citizen!

[ror-wip]

Hercules and Adam watching as Humanity throws shit at Jack The Ripper less than one day after both proclaimed that they forgive Humanity, and saying Humanity deserved forgiveness despite their flaws

(The closer you are to a god, the easier it is to forgive humanity. The further you are from the people you forgive, the easier it is to excuse them.)

[sad-soup-and-chaos]

very mournful.

like a victorian lady

I should start describing my blorbos in this way

[luxthestrange]

RoR Incorrect quotes#121 Go away papa

Daddy Poseidon + Atheist!Y/n had twins...And the babies got all their features from Poseidon...and straight up don't like him-...hell even in your belly the moment Poseidon put his hand on your belly they KICK it off you as if going "GET YOUR DISCUTING HANDS OFF MUMMY"-...normally the twins didn't kick or move a lot like they knew your uncomfy...the twins don't like many only cute and cuddly with you but there are surprising...special exceptions...like uncle hades, kojiro,Heracles and... Adamas both twins smile at him-...pathetic dad Poseidon is all I want-

Zeus*Looking at the twin's who are the carbon copy of him wrapped in little burritos sucking their binkies...only a month old-*...They attack?

Poseidon*Holding his twins in arms with bags under his eyes*...Worse

Twins*looking at Zeus like he is the scum of the earth,heaven n Hell, up and down unimpressed by him*...

Poseidon:-They JUDGE you...

Zeus:...

...Dunno what their names be-

[bones4thecats]

When you try messing with your adopted sibling...

Adamas: Hey, let’s mess with Y/N, guys! Zeus: Hey, Y/N, your mama's so fat- Reader: My mom committed multiple war crimes and is now locked in solitary confinement in a Valhallan prison. Adamas: Well, uh- your dad- Reader: My father left when I was two to be captured and consequentially sacrificed by a group of feral ferrets. Poseidon: The fuck- Zeus: Well then... Hades: Stop it, Zeus! Zeus: Your grandparents are so- Reader: My grandmother floated into the sky like a balloon with too much helium when my grandfather spontaneously combusted. The Olympian Brothers: ... Reader: You cannot best me, brothers.

[chaostroberry1]

Apollo, in a seductive mouth watering outfit, leaning on the doorframe, winking and hinting at something : "(m/n)~ I'll be good tonight and sleep all by myself while I wait for you, okay~♥?"

(M!name), in a meeting with a few gods, incredibly oblivious : "alright! Sleep well. goodnight, dear!"

Apollo : "better join me soon~♥" *walks away to the bedroom*

The gods who just witnessed the BS : "😧"

---

---

I got this from that death note scene of misa in a sexy outfit, obviously hinting at light on "stuff" she wanna do later. Motherfucker did not understand what she meant ☠️

[recreationalfanfics]

Record of Ragnarok x Reader but It's Tik Tok Audios (pt 3)

You: Father...Am I ugly?

Adam, as he hugs you: What nonsense. I'm looking at you right now, you're the most beautiful person in the heavens♡

Loki: Uncle, am I ugly?

Odin: Yes, very much.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You, texting someone: I don't know what to say.

Brunhilde: Here let me do it.

You:...Don't be mean about it, though.

Brunhilde: *deletes paragraph*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Au where (Y/n) is Poseidon's equally moody and emo child

You: WHEN DID YOU SUDDENLY BECOME UNCOOL!?

Poseidon: WHEN DID YOU START ACTING LIKE A LITTLE BABY WHO SCREAMS AT ME WHENEVER THEY DON'T GET WHAT THEY WANT!?

You: RIGHT AFTER YOU DON'T GIVE ME WHAT I WANT!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raiden: You can't run around like a footless chicken.

You: HEADLESS chicken, big guy.

Raiden: Uh, NO! How's a chicken supposed to run without its head!?

You: How's it supposed to run with no feet?

Raiden: I'M NOT A CHICKEN, (Y/N), WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME ALL THESE QUESTIONS!?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zeus: SOMEOME SHOULD PUT YOU IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL!

You: SOMEONE SHOULD PUT YOU IN A BOX FLOATING DOWN THE RIVER, G R A N D P A

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You, a new diety: So, what do you guys do for fun around here?

Loki: I dunno, I usually just throw shit at Shiva now.

You: Whose Shiva?

Loki, throwing a water bottle: YO SHIVA!

Shiva, whose STILL RECOVERING FROM R A I D E N: Yeah- *gets hit*

[amphitriteswife]

Poseidon: turn that shit off

Y/N: wdym. It helps me sleep.

Poseidon: the brightness is bothering me. What are you even watching at this hour?

Y/N mukbang.

Poseidon: you humans and your stupid eating shows

[harusaki-hugo]

ROR Incorrect Quotes!!

Y/n: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste Zerofuku: We got spring water Y/n: NO. Buddha: with EXTRA minerals Zerofuku: it's like licking a stalagmite Y/n: DON'T COME HOME. Buddha: Mmmmm cave water

///////////

Y/n: Buddha and I are having a baby. Zerofuku: That's gre- Y/n, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

-------

Y/n: What did you do with Hades's body? QSH: What didn’t I do with the body? Y/n: QSH: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.

\\\\\\\\\\\

Y/n: You have to apologize to QSH Hades: Fine. Hades: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

[xx-lemon-drop-xx]

(Y/n): Me and Buddha are having a baby.

Zerofuku: Oh that's great! I'm so happy for yo-

(Y/n): *Aggressively slams down adoption papers* It's you, sign here.

[hannah-the-red-head]

Brunhilde: WHAT IN THE NAME OF THE GODS HAPPENED?!! Adam: *lying on a hospital bed with a broken arm, a black eye and many bruises* Kojiro: *Sitting uncomfortably in a chair with a bag of ice on his crotch and a neck cast* Buddha: *covered in a full body cast aside from his head* Lu Bu: *had his jaw wired shut, both arms and a leg broken* Nikola: *in a wheelchair with a broken leg and neck, holding an ice pack on his head* Owww… Jack: *in a medically induced coma* Raiden: *covered head to toe in bandages with a broken arm and a neck brace* I said it was a bad idea!! But noooo, Dr. Nikola “Let’s test that theory” Tesla just had to prove that an Elevator made by the gods must have a weight limit exceeding 2000 lbs!!

[incorrect-record-of-ragnarok]

Brunhilde: Why do you put up with Buddha? Kintoki: Oh, um, you know. Because we're friends. Brunhilde: Why? Kintoki: Wow, you ask really hard questions. Look, I know he can be aggravating, but you have to remember he's not doing it on purpose. It's just how he is. Oh, but he's also loyal and trustworthy, and we have fun together. Brunhilde: You know you're describing a dog. Kintoki: He DID bite me once. But in his defense, I came up behind him while he was eating. Brunhilde, deadpan: They hate that.

[ror-wip]

Beelzebub's friendships in a nutshell

Tesla, gently on the phone: Oh, did you just wake up?

Adamas, banging his hand on the door like the apocalypse is coming: OPEN UP FUCKNUGGET!!

Beelzebub, who just spend the past 48 hours working on a new project

[thekingwhereitallends]

Hades:Look who is back!

Anubis:(leaps towards Hades and wraps arms around his neck) I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!

Hades:I believe you.

Anubis:I HAVE BEEN A GOOD BOY AND NEVER REALLY HURT ANYONE!

Hades:You are not just a good boy. You are the best boy around

Anubis:I EVEN WATCHED OVER HELHEIM AND PLAYED WITH CERBERUS!

Hades:You're too sweet,Anubis.

Hades:(pats Anubis on top of head)

Anubis:Welcome home,Hades.

Hades:Thank you,Anubis.

[luxthestrange]

RoR Incorrect quotes#188 No thoughts head empty stare

Y/n*Sitting beside him giggles seeing your villager and his villager from Animal Crossing get married* Til death do us part, right, Puppy?

Anubis*Who thinks they're actually married now and grins at you* It's cute you think death can separate us~

[lilithizhere]

Incorrect Quotes #1

RoR Modern!Household with Child/Teen!Reader:

Adam:Hey has anyone seen Y/N?

Shiva:Nope

Lu Bu:No

Eve:No sorry

Adam:Fuck...

Hermes:If I may ask why are you looking for them?

Adam:They stole Ares sword and Ares is crying about it and I don't want them to hurt themselves.

Ares:*Crying* My sword!! That little Gremlin!!*sobs*

Meanwhile:

Y/n:Fuck Yeah I have his sword!!!