#inclusive caregiver

[hexadeximal]

(no minors, please! all images taken from target's website)

make believe ideas snuggables are so cute 🥺

[aszcaringheartsinc]

Person-centered care is more than just a buzzword; it’s a transformative approach that ensures individuals with disabilities receive the support they truly need. This method focuses on tailoring care to meet the unique needs and preferences of each person, empowering them to live fulfilling lives. In home care services in Oakland Park, Florida, person-centered care has proven to be especially crucial for individuals with disabilities.

[mobilityshop]

Did You Know?

Did you know something as simple as REAR WHEEL POSITIONING can drastically change your wheelchair experience? 🤔

It's true! Getting it right can mean the difference between comfort and discomfort, stability and tipping over. 😬

Want to learn more? Check out this super helpful guide about Wheelchair Rear Wheel Positioning

[magic-astro-fae]

Aspects to Venus

Depending on whether the Venus aspects are challenging or beneficial will determine one’s relationship w the themes found below

Venus/ ASC: Physical beauty, charismatic, sociable, inviting, warm, pleasantries, comfortable home, emphasis on fashion/ hair/ skin care, social chameleon, comforting, inclusive

Venus/ Sun: Attractive personality, strong sense of self, individualized style, complimentary, relationship oriented, energized thru socialization, interests in fashion/ makeup/ beauty

Venus/ Moon: Beautiful home, clean/ hygienic, comforting food, healthy meals and lifestyle, beauty routines, retail therapy, creature comforts, caring for loved ones needs, caregiving, nurturing

Venus/ Mercury: Attractive speaking/ singing voice, empathetic communication, art/ literature, intellectually inclined, diverse friends, inclusivity, community oriented, reading/ writing

Venus/ Mars: Balance, achievers, articulate, practical abilities, romantic, relationship oriented, sexually inclined, physical attractiveness, hard workers, money makers, active and social

Venus/ Jupiter: Welcoming, bubbly, humorous, large features (eyes/ breasts/ thighs/ etc) prominent speaking voice, unique laughs, family oriented, diverse social circles, spirituality

Venus/ Saturn: Hard workers, money making/ saving, consistency, reliability, introverted, responsible in love, respectful, long term planning, strives for security, refined tastes

Venus/ Uranus: Unconventional lifestyles, unique style, individualized beauty routines, inclusivity, diverse friendships, fights for love, tough love, mysterious aura, social chameleon, intelligent

Venus/ Neptune: Dreamers, romantics, spiritual, accepting of others, caregivers, empathetic towards others, introverted, fantasies of love, romantic, physical beauty, mystery

Venus/ Pluto: Loyalty, intense relationships, diverse friendships, unconventional lifestyles, unique self expression/ style, routine, beauty regiments, personal success/ money makers

[quinnysnursery]

you should do an informational post on caring for neurodivergent and/or chronically ill littles!!

caring for neurodivergent and chronically ill littles ! [a guide]

written by a neurodivergent little and a caregiver to a chronically ill little <3

[it should be noted that everyone experiences different symptoms/has different needs; i'll be focusing on sensory issues and chronic pain in this guide]

Be understanding !

It's important to remember for both caregivers and regressors that while something's may not make sense to us- that doesn't mean you can't be understanding.

You might not be able to feel the difference in fabric textures but your little/cg can.

Your legs might not hurt after walking short distances, but your little/cg's might.

These are real experiences your little/cg may deal with that you will have to be understanding of.

There may be times where your little/cg cannot play and need to rest, or times where games may need to be modified to ensure both of you have fun playing- reassure your little/cg that they are not burdens for needing accommodations !

Get creative !

"But Quinny, how can I make accommodations for my little/cg?!"

I'm glad you asked!! For neurodivergent littles/cgs, you may want to take extra time explaining the rules of a game or turning down the volume of shows/movies!

For chronically ill littles/cgs, low-movement activities such as arts 'n crafts or cozy pillow forts.

[There is a really great post by @mortuarymorticia about chronically ill carers that you can find, here!]

Be patient !

Flare-ups/Bad sensory days can lead to fussy littles.

Flare-ups/Bad sensory days can lead to caregivers needing breaks.

These are both okay! It's important to listen to each other's needs and limits; healthy cg/little dynamics work together to find compromises.

Tips & Tricks !

Finding dolls/books/toys with disbaility inclusive storylines/characters/features can do wonders!

Keeping fun/cute water bottles or sippy cups nearby! [Bonus points if you have some liquid IV on hand -- or just a electrolyte drink in general]

Mobiles are great for kiddos who need lotsa bed-rest!!

being chronically ill/disabled/neurodivergent does not make you a bad regressor/caregiver <3

[dividers creds to @softandsleepyboy]

-- with sparkles and love,

quinny 💌

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hi bisexual sex ed person batman

Do you think teenagers masturbating to porn is bad or neutral

And also i have another question. We know young kids and sex is not a good match. Not questioning that. But do you know why, exactly? Like why is it traumatizing for a small kid to watch porn but not for a teenager. Like how does that work

Thank you in advance. And uh. Happy saturday

hi anon,

okay, so. I need you to understand that you're first question is basically this.

like, you want me to classify EVERY teenager who's ever jacked it to ANY kind of porn as either bad or neutral? good's not even an option? jesus christ.

let's say that I think any body jacking off to anything is for the most part a pretty morally neutral act so long as they're not cranking it on public transit or while spying on someone who is unaware of their presence and therefore unable to consent.

as for your second question, this is going to be unpopular but it's actually not inherently traumatizing for a prepubescent child to see porn. don't get me wrong, I'm in no way advocating for showing your baby porn instead of cocomelon or whatever, but there's no trauma button that automatically gets switched if it happens.

which I can say with a decent amount of firsthand experience because, you know, I work with kids, and I also work with their parents to talk about the experiences that they had as children. every time I teach my class I get parents telling me about how they found porn mags for the first time when they were young, in their parents' bedroom or in a gutter or, once, hidden in some farm equipment. and a lot of their kids have seen porn online by the time they're in the age range I teach (about 11 years old), whether accidentally or shown it a a crude prank by another child.

and for the most part they're like... completely fine. the adults who saw porn as kids grew up to be the kind of thoughtful, conscientious parents who want their kids to receive quality, inclusive sex education. most of their kids find it silly, because they can't imagine why adults might want to do something that looks so weird and awkward, or they get a little kick out of seeing something adult that they know is supposed to be off limits, or they don't get it and don't think much about it at all. hell, some of those kids will experience one of their first encounters with sexual arousal; that's a thing that's perfectly healthy for kids to experience and some are early bloomers!

some kids might find it confusing or upsetting, sure, but those kids also tend to put the magazine away or close the video very quickly. kids are, you know, people, and they're pretty good at just moving away from things that bother them. and discomfort is, ultimately, not the same thing as trauma.

to be sure, some kids have a long-term bad reaction, but there are often extenuating circumstances in that case. there are obvious cases in which porn is shown to a child specifically by an abuser, but I've also found that for a lot of people what causes their long-term psychological distress wasn't them seeing porn but the way their caregivers reacted to it, making the child feel ashamed and dirty without ever giving them an explanation for why the adults in their life reacted so negatively. that can create a huge burden that leaves people feeling shaky and insecure in their sexuality for decades after the fact.

once again, I just want to be super clear on this before anyone starts trying to make it seem like I think Coolsville sucks: I don't think little kids should be seeing a lot of porn! if a kid in your life is doing that, they should be directed gently away with a thoughtful explanation of what they've been looking at and why it's not a good fit for them at their age nor a good model of what real sexuality is like. it can be difficult to suppress the urge to panic and react harshly, even if you feel it's in the kid's best interest, but they deserve an explanation that will make clear that they're not the one in the wrong.

but, again, there's not a switch in a child's brain that automatically traumatizes them if they see a titty.

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

when u look at nonverbal nonspeaking people diagnose with severe/profound intellectual disability you see roughly 2 group people:

1. people who it misdiagnosis because severe global apraxia motor issues make it impossible/near impossible mouth speak (at all or reliably). n difficulty control movement from that mean usual method of teach usual AAC not meet needs, make usual neuropsych etc assessment results unreliable because so much of it depend on reliable motor control, n unreliable movements often fit people assumption about what ID look like. but ultimately it not a intellectual/cognitive problem (many of them typical or high intelligence), it a global motor problem n it a speech problem (which for them is motor problem) not language problem.

2. people whose severe profound ID correct diagnosis & they nonverbal minimally verbal because language problem (n possibly speak motor problem but you need language first before think about mouth speak) because cognitive intellectual problem.

both group definitely exist. have seen people say group 1 not exist they all fake or faked by hopeful caregivers n clinicians, only group 2 exist. have also seen people say group 2 not exist, what you think of group 2 is all actually group 1 all of them. n both of them wrong

but base on how group 1 talk about how entire life they been assumed be group 2, both look similar enough under how developmental disabilities currently be understand n treated by professionals

2 group have some distinct n contradictory needs. group 1 want inclusion programs not segregated programs want same hardness education as nondisabled peers want be talked to n treated as same as cognitively able peers bc they cognitively abled, not 1+1 drills or “how cook” at school because assumed not able understand academics. they want communication methods that actually work with body with motor.

but if give same thing to group 2 it unhelpful at best n harmful/more frustrating n so cause more “challenging behaviors” - be taught things they will never understand because that what severe profound ID means, n be constantly surround by complicated thing dont understand n expect to do complicated thing dont understand is frustrating n they no way communicate that other than behaviorally. they often medically complex in way only have limited amount time n energy n brain slots to learn so it better teach them stuff that they may actually realistically use, like very basic daily life skills. communication support for them look like language development support n maybe communicate basic wants n needs via picture cards, n some them may never progress beyond answer basic question like what want eat with 1 maybe 2 picture cards, not to mention long phrases grammar sentences. some may not understand high tech AAC well enough to use. it not judgement it just realistic life for many.

n if give those to group 1 people, which many group 1 people got, my god it endlessly frustrating too

but. don’t know how tell apart group 1 from 2 beyond group 1 people say they group 1 (which, many group 1 people at parts of life not able do that bc motor). motor tests depend on cognitive intellectual understanding instructions, n cognitive intellectual testing depend on motor. “listen” n “presume competence” all true but idk how give what each group need without accident put them in other group n so give them “support” they not need. am not going be single person solve this but all scenario come up in head feel always there at least one reason fail. always fear that.

[thatbitchery]

As a woman I've been accused of being 'masc' for plenty things, my absolute favorite has been the fact that i refuse to play therapist or trauma dump to literally anyone,including my friends or family.

Ladies, they are right. Women are more predisposed to emotion than men are. I'm afraid they are right. This is an evolutionary biological truth that XX does make you emotionally based.

This is not a weakness. In fact in plenty ways this is an advantage. Presence of emotion is not lack of logic, the two are not opposing forces.

This could very well be your greatest weakness, if you let it.

Almost every single form of abuse is enhanced by emotion. The people that hurt you did so because you had emotion invested. Every single piece of pain you've felt has been because you had your feelings caught up. This is why Shera7 says if you start liking him, run. When feelings walk in success jump out of the window. Why ? Emotion is a lizard brain thing, it leaves you completely pre disposed to instinct, and instinct isn't about what's good for you it's about what's good for survival. We say turn your feelings off because your feelings are concerned with the most basic of survival instincts, not progress.

That being said,let's get back to where this post was headed to pre rant- you're not a therapist. Don't act like one. Your feminine urge to fix and nurture is meant for your children, my love. Children. It's a caregiver package kind of deal. Is it your child? Well- a child? No? Mind your business. Everyone below the age of 15 yes can tap into that therapist that's you but the rest? Especially men? No.

Heres the thing- sex is the least burdening thing m3n use women for. In fact in most cases you could get used by someone without them ever touching your skin, and you feel it. You feel when you're getting used. Whether it is for your softness or intellect or free labor or nurturing side or- you can feel it. You can feel it when someone is draining from your feminine pool, and one great advantage of being female is your instincts are 5× more enhanced than your brother.

Stop letting people use you as a live in therapist to trauma dump or leave in cheerleader to gloat, and the 'people' is inclusive of women but mostly men.

The second the childhood trauma makes a cameo into the conversation they have ten seconds to wrap it up before you clock out.

Relationships are not based on the past they are based on the present. When we say be vulnerable- we are talking about your needs. Your desire. Your emotions- in the present. What does your childhood have to do with us right now my dude? & Hollywood has made it seem like trauma dumping is the ultimate form of trust- I've never told anyone about this so you're special because I told you it means I trust you- ew no get a therapist? If I'm special buy me a jet or stocks- invest in my wellbeing. How is knowing your past a special thing? Every offense possible meant- but what does your dad gotta do with trusting me? If you trust me lets be partners in a business? Hollywood has made it seem like it's a milestone in a relationship to know all the trauma tea- and maybe it is, but it means nothing. It's simply information.

In fact I've learned over time the trauma dump is an investment to future fuck ups as an excuse and a bail-me-out method. Babe you know my dad used to be shitty so excuse me for not knowing how to communicate and hurting our relationship you should let this go because three months ago I made an investment into my bail account for all my future fuck ups by opening up to you. Uhm. No bye. You don't deal with your issues so I have to? Door. Down the hall to the left. Lock it and forget my pass key, I suggest finding one to a therapist. I'm not paying in my adulthood for your childhood, Chad. Your past can not hurt my present, Chad, get a therapist. Chad. It wasn't your fault but it's also not mine, Chad, so I'm not taking responsibility for or the burnt of it, Chad. Matter of fact I'll take advantage of you over it, Chad, like you're trying to take advantage of me through it. Chaddie buddie.

On the same note, do not be anyone's cheerleader or gloat pot. Another thing m3n could use you for- especially if you're easy to please- ego enhancer. No don't get me wrong by all means do cheer your people in their achievements, but- achievements. Not thoughts or philosophies or worse- ambition. Achievements are tangible. I ran a marathon today- Yay. I'm planning to run a marathon- ok good luck. I bought stocks- Ok. I have a billion dollar idea- mhm. I made a billion dollars- great. I think children suffering is bad- OK. I donated to a child support cause- Yay. When I was ten I was boxing champion. Kk. I made it into the boxing championship- yay. Learn to cheer results that you find worthy of cheering- not something as bland and useless as ambition or an idea or- God forbid- philosophy or belief system. I know they trained you well in the bare-minimum-simpy camp but not to worry. I'll pluck it all out.

If you do not have the kind of relationship that allows them to be that open with you, let them know. Either mentally clock out, ie

"So actually my dad was really abusive. He-"

You: stare out the window. Echo a mhm. Take interest in the floor. Echo a 'ok'. Look at your phone.

Or, b) let them know

"When I was a kid I-"

"I don't think we have the kind of relationship where you should tell me that, let's stick within our boundaries. I think I need more lemonade. By the way, Alex told me-"

Or c) okay, and?

"You know I think what they're doing in Palestine is wrong because-"

"How much have you donated so far? "

"Well nothing, but"

"I think a donation will do more good than a philosophical discussion, we all know it's wrong. I emailed you the files. See you later"

See the thing, my love, is you're not stupid. You can tell. You can tell when you're being used you can tell when you're being exploited and when you force yourself to look past it in an attempt to 'score a relationship' or 'keep the peace' you make an investment in future abuse and you will hate yourself for it. Tell me I'm lying. Tell me you don't look into your past self with disgust. Tell me trauma dumping and gloat potting have not played a part in you getting used. Go on.

[vague-humanoid]

@startorrent02

A sweeping new definition of long COVID could help affected people get recognition of their condition and improve diagnosis and treatment.

The U.S. National Academies of Sciences, Engineering and Medicine announced the definition for long COVID June 11.

Previous definitions of long COVID have been all over the map, each with its own set of accepted symptoms, timelines and requirements for proof of infection (SN: 7/29/22).

That lack of standardization “left many patients in the lurch without clear ability to be recognized for the condition that they had, with difficulty explaining to family and even to their caregivers,” says Harvey Fineberg, a public health expert who chaired the committee that drafted the definition. “We heard from literally hundreds of people experiencing long COVID about the challenges that they had in being heard, in gaining access to care and obtaining the care they needed.”

[autisticfaun420]

My crazy high school friends...

Okay was it incredibly ableist and messed up that my friend group initially befriended me just because they wanted to see a special ed kid get stoned and thought I was too stupid to tell on them, oh absolutely it was.

Is it true that they've all matured since then and have been incredibly supportive and inclusive and respect how smart I am while also willing to accommodate me, yeah absolutely.

High school was the most freedom I had in my life, people with my support needs don't get to have a wild high school experience but I'm blessed that my parents somehow trusted a group of teenage stoner metalheads to watch me with no other caregiver. They were all my caregivers. If I had a violent meltdown around them, they didn't mind taking a punch, they would blast Cannibal Corpse and tell me to mosh it out. One of my friends, also my personal hero for making this possible, was actually willing to change my adult diapers so we could hang out with NO ADULTS THERE LMAO. I got to get high in all the places teenagers got high and even got to do MDMA once. If I needed emotional reassurance they would cuddle and soothe me and these were the same guys who thought accidently touching balls turned you gay LMAO. Thats true allyship in my eyes. Willing to change diapers and turn gay just so I can have a normal high school experience. I love my friends so much and they made me who I am today.

[hexadeximal]

(no minors, please! all images taken from walmart's website)

I love play food so much 🥺💙

[tiny-tk]

hi friends !! i finally finished making this :D i tried to come up with inclusive agere questions that rly make u think and aren’t specific to any brands, countries, media, etc. hopefully i did a good job at that ^^

feel free to use or repost this image as long as the credit stays in tact !!

. :+* made with a free canva template by So Swell Edu

. :+* plain text version under the cut !!

20 AGERE QUESTIONS

1. how did you first find out about agere in general?

2. how did u first find out that you were a regressor?

3. what nicknames or pet names do you like to be called when you’re little?

4. does your music taste change when you’re regressed? if so, how?

5. which fictional characters do you most relate to (or kin) when you’re little? do you still relate to them when you’re not regressed?

6. do you usually regress voluntarily or involuntarily (or a mix of both)?

7. what most often makes you regress?

8. if you don’t have a cg, would you want one? if you do have a cg, how’d you meet them?

9. if you have other marginalised identities (lgbtq+, neurodivergent, poc, etc), how do they figure into your regression? (intersectionality is so cool)

10. are you open about your age regression irl? how about online outside of tumblr?

11. what physical places do you associate with your regression? (school, parks, shops, people’s houses, etc)

12. what’s something typically associated with agere (pacis, babbling, bluey, etc) that you don’t do?

13. how does your current regressed personality differ from your personality when you were physically that age?

14. do you use different pronouns or preferred names when you’re regressed? if so, what are they?

15. what platforms do you usually go to for agere content? (tumblr, pinterest, instagram, etc)

16. what’s a niche or unpopular interest you associate with your regression?

17. what’s ur favorite color + something you love that’s that color?

18. which (if any) fictional characters do you think would be littles?

19. which (if any) fictional characters do you think would be caregivers?

20. what’s something you wish you knew about agere when you first found out about it?

by @tiny-tk on tumblr

tumblr tag: #20 agere questions

[mobilityshop]

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Here's the kicker: amazing value for the price! Check it out at Mobility Shop London and see if it's your perfect match: link to Mobility Shop London

[arquaticdreamer]

Ambiguous emotional rant:

Being nonspeaking/nonverbal, HSN and homebound anyone with high support needs and complex needs knows just how much autonomous and liberating the internet has to be for those of us who have no other safe place to be our true unapologetic, unadulterated, and authentic weird selves. I am very grateful and appreciative for the internet’s existence that it was ever even created/invented by mankind and that we have the freedom of speech to post (hopefully not all Nonspeakers, AAC users, or HSN disabled people have the freedom of speech to post what they like on the internet sadly) but for those who have good supportive caregivers, and those who have learned how to successfully, and safely access the internet World Wide Web, this is my toast to all of you who have found some semblance of human rights, freedom of speech, creative freedom and expression through your own words, I’m all so happy to be born in the right time in human history to have lived to see this day where hundreds of thousands of autistics, LSN, MSN, HSN, those verbal, semi verbal, minimally verbal, and nonverbal/nonspeaking have a place (so sorry for those who have not found it yet, or might not ever), to post what they like, to the best of their ability. I’m just so very grateful to have made a digital footprint on internet history. I pray we can make the internet a safer more inclusive and accessible accepting environment. Those of us who will most likely never be seen or known for who we truly are online than they see us in real life. Just know that you’re welcome here with me.

Julian & Damian

[softspace-fics]

Hiii so I just went through kinda a mental health crisis today (VERY long story short I'm at my grandma's house cuz I swallowed sum I wasn't supposed to but I'm okay now my throat just feels icky) you absolutely 100% do not (REPEAT DO NOT) need to do this request at all you can ignore it cuz ik it's uncomfortable what im about to ask (im sorry in advance if you are uncomfy I get it)

Could you possibly write a little while they're big try to hurt themselves and can't get into littlespace and to embarrassed about feeling like hurting themselves to talk about it with someone I honestly don't care with who but I've been on a Wade and Bucky kick recently

Like I said you can ignore this your writing just so comforting and amazing and I want to feel more of that thank you for listening

I hope you have an amazing day, and if you're not, I hope it gets better

You mean to much.

A/N - I genuinely took awhile to make this because I wanted to be as inclusive as possible, but I think I related this to myself a little too close. I hope you all enjoy, and understand that if you ever need someone I'm here. Your never alone in your fight. If you ever need someone please contact your suicide hotline. You don't need to fight alone. To anon I hope your feeling better and this story helps you in the way you need, I'm sorry you went through what you did.

Masterlist - all my work!

Warnings ⚠️: Depressive episode, thoughts of self harm, negative thoughts, overwhelmed reader, reader thinks about leaving bucky, tears, bucky cries for a min, reader breakdown, please let me know if I missed any!

Please read with caution.

Bucky Barnes x GN!little reader

________________

Today sucked. The entire day even before you woke was a nightmare. You had woken up at 5am from a grueling nightmare that made you not want to even attempt to go back to sleep. Getting up, you even attempted to make your own food before that enviably failed too. You got dressed into outerwear but decided after the third attempt of trying to get your shoes on, that it was just not worth trying to try your luck outside.

So you didn’t. You attempted to do some of your hobbies, but even those weren’t appealing to you at the moment and seeing that you caregiver was out, you decided to take a bath. You hoped that the ability to chill in the tub and maybe watch a show would help get your brain to decide to actually function.

What a bad idea that was though. You ended up just staring at yourself in the mirror for a unknown amount of time, nitpicking every mark, scratch, unbalanced feature, and anything else your brain could make you decide to hate.

You viewed how your body was different than those around you, how it could be seen as so very wrong for you to be with Bucky. How did you even end up with a super soldier like him? Did you put a spell on him? Was he playing your feelings?

Maybe if you changed yourself he’d be better off? There’s no way he misses the looks you two get when you go in public. Who knows how the avengers feel about you? Bucky could get anyone he ever wanted and he settled on you.

The thoughts began to cloud your mind, and the urges to mutate your own body starts to completely black out any rational thoughts your brain was trying to give you. However, no matter how bad these thoughts were trying to get you, you couldn’t break the promises that you and Bucky had made previously.

This wasn’t the first time you had one of these bad days, where everything was trying to push you over the edge. The last time you had one of these days though you gave into the urges, and this meant that Bucky found out. He saw the long sleeves on a 100+ day and something told him to check in on you.

When he did, he found out about your scars, and your fresh wounds. This was early on in your relationship and you were worried you were about to scare him off, that’s as until he pulled you into his arms and a few stray tears rolled down his face as he reassured you that you were the most beautiful human being in the multiverse.

He begged you to tell him if these days ever happened where the world had everything against you. He begged for you to throw away the things that you would harm yourself with, and in which you did, you threw out the things your brain would make you use, and you told him you’d try to tell him if these days happened.

You wanted to, you really did, but you couldn’t fathom bothering him on a day where he had numerous meetings and a day that he was going to spend hanging out with his best friend. Why in the world would you pile more problems onto his plate?

You eventually pulled yourself from the mirror, walking over to the couch and curling into the corner of it. You pulled a blanket off the back of the couch, tears streaming down your face, and tried to just sleep off the icky feelings.

As you laid there, crying quietly, your regression decided to say hello. The baby’s brain didn’t understand why it felt the way it did. It wasn’t sure why it felt as if their dada shouldn't love them anymore, why was he going to be better off without them? Was he truly going to be?

You woke up a few hours later, to the shuffling of you onto something new, as if something- someone, was picking you up. The scent gave away the person almost immediately, and you almost completely subconsciously grabbed onto him.

“Dada?” You mumbled quietly, your eyes opening to your worried caregivers face.

“Baby? Why were you crying?” You feel Bucky softly attempt to wipe off the dried tears, bouncing you softly, concern lacing every fiber of his being.

You look away solemnly, your mind beginning to remind you how you weren’t good enough for him. the clouded judgment of others remaining in your own little mind.

In hopes he’d drop the topic, you shook your head and hid your face in his neck, clinging to him even more. This only heightened his worry as he held you tighter, closer, and even more protectively.

“Baby please, your worrying me.” He mumbles softly into your hair, kissing it before resting his forehead against the top of your head.

He had a feeling it was a bad day for you, and he was so worried you hadn’t been able to feel like calling him to help, what if you had done something? What if he couldn’t have stopped you? What’s if he let you down just like everyone else?

The sounds of your tears came through the broken explanation of the day you had and you did your best to tell him that you’d be okay if he left you. All that he did when he heard you say that was hold onto you tighter and closer. He just mumbled gentle no’s and a silent sigh of relief when you said you couldn’t do it because you didn’t want to break your promises.

Bucky slowly walked over to your nursery, sitting down in the rocking chair that he had made so that you and him could comfortably sit and he could care for you. He softly pulled you from your hiding spot in his neck, where his neck and shirt were soaked with tears.

“Never, ever believe that I’d need anyone but you. I don't care what people think or say, you saved me and that means that when theses days happen id do anything to save you too. It’s perfectly okay to have these thoughts, and its okay to ask for help. Everyone needs a little help sometimes, that’s why I’m here yeah? Never do you have to go through these big emotions alone anymore okay? That’s why I’m here. I promise not one thing you say will ever change my mind, or change how I feel about being your dada. You're too perfect for me. Your not alone.”

He firmly and calmly talks you, just above a whisper, as if he was worried the walls would hear how much his hearted ached for you, and use it against him. You meant the world to Bucky, and his heart broke knowing that you felt this way.

The only thing you could muster through the walls of regression, and the emotional overboard was a nod before dragging him back into you and your face going back right where it was.

Bucky didn’t let you go for about 3 days, he didn’t leave the house, even though he was supposed to be going somewhere for work, he called and told them he wouldn’t be there. He spent days making sure that you were safe and sound, and knew how much he truely loved you. He helped in whatever way he could to make you realize how much you meant to him.

[hallowpen]

The Influence of Thai Culture on Attitudes towards Disabilities as it Relates to Last Twilight

(This is a combination of personal experiences/observations having lived in Bangkok and my learned academic knowledge/own personal research. I am not an expert by any means, but I wanted to offer some insight from my own personal point of view.)

While Thailand has certain provisions in place to prevent disability discrimination, it is still very much present in Thai society. Disability legislation is not strictly enforced and accessibility is extremely limited. That is not to say that efforts aren't being made to promote education and inclusivity, just that views and attitudes toward individuals with disabilities have been slow to reform. As such, there is a negative stigma that exists in Thailand where disabled individuals are, for the most part, seen as a burden or an inconvenience. There are certain cultural aspects that, unfortunately, contribute toward this outlook:

Collectivism and Tradition - Thailand can be labeled as a collectivistic society. What that means is, there is a tendency to favor the 'grouped' majority over individual interests. As a result, individuals with disabilities are less likely to be integrated into their communities. The urge to conform to group rules and traditions hinders Thai society from accepting "disruptive" change. Communities prefer to avoid the uncertainty and ambiguity of the unknown, which reduces the amount of conversations centering around disability education. I stated in my review of LT, that there needed to be a deeper conversation surrounding the experiences and realities of the disabled community in order for the series to have the impact it intended to. And this is why. It needs to be talked about, otherwise nothing will change and, much like the last part of that final episode, ableist views/language will prevail.

Religious Influence - At this point (if you are a fan of Thai dramas), you probably already know that Buddhism is the predominant religion in Thailand. We are taught to be merciful towards the weak and to give of ourselves to those who are less fortunate. While helping others should absolutely be seen as morally good, these viewpoints can also give rise to societal stigmas surrounding disabilities. Receiving unsolicited assistance as a disabled person became a constant question of: are you genuinely concerned out of kindness OR because you somehow see me as 'less than' and therefore feel you have a moral obligation to step in. In LT, I understood Day's insistent worry of being on the receiving end of someone else's pity. There was a reason why it was so prevalent in his story and why he questioned the motives of others' actions so frequently. Because Thai culture has inadvertently labeled disabled people as being 'frail' and 'in need' and who should, therefore, be met with sympathy.

Caregiving - While there are social welfare programs and services available in Thailand, generally, it is the responsibility of the family to care for and provide for their disabled relatives. Intergenerational care is a big part of Thai culture, but in this instance it's not entirely positive. The broader Thai society infantilizes people with disabilities, which means they are often disallowed from making their own decisions by those who care for them (sound familiar?). As a result, they live under less than ideal conditions that exclude them from being active members of their communities. It's upsetting that people with disabilities exist largely out of the public eye, when opportunities to be present in society and engaging with their community could potentially change their status and offset stereotypical attitudes. One of the best parts of LT that I will continuously praise it for, is Mhok's version of caregiving that completely turns these views on its (their?) head. He's not afraid to stand up to Day (or how Day's been conditioned to feel toward his blindness) and gently pushes him toward self acceptance and engagement within his community. Mhok is subtle in a way that he does what is required of him as a caregiver without ever taking away Day's agency. And that was extremely important to see against Day's mother's more 'traditional' care.

Treatment - I'm not well versed when it comes to Thai healthcare. I do know that outside of traditional medicine, access to more advanced modern treatment is highly dependent on income and social standing. Other than that, it is a disabled person's prerogative to seek treatment if a treatment exists for their disability and is accessible to them. It is also their prerogative to refuse treatment. Neither decision should be judged or actively swayed by outside perspectives (though this happens more often than not). It is highly plausible that someone in Day's position, coupled with his mother's status, would have both the access and the desire to receive a corneal transplant surgery. The outcome of Day's vision being restored was never the issue for me. The fault lies in its execution and what was implied in the aftermath.

...that's all I got. I don't really know how to end this...I'm tired.

(Please note, this is not at all meant to paint Thailand in a bad light. Thai society is fairly accepting of individuals with disabilities and positive attitudes do exist, but certain perspectives need to change!)

tagging @lurkingshan @waitmyturtles @shannankle