#inanimate insanity analysis

[sasterisk]

II SEASON 2 EPISODE 18 SPOILERS

So with the reveal of Box being alive, and with her and Suitcase being connected in some way, I wanted to elaborate on a few of my theories:

CW: mentions of selfcest and sibling headcanons, keep your head on straight pls

We see many versions of this same character concept, MePhone4 clearly had a hard time finding the right fit for the show and did a lot of workshopping. Seeing how similar these characters are to both of them, I think Suitcase and Box are characters with the same soul, copy and pasted into different bodies, but their experiences have made them separate characters.

Some more proof of that would be Suitcases hallucinations. In this episode at the beginning we see Suitcase SAVE a silhouette from drowning, this silhouette clearly looking like Box. This could be symbolic, Suitcase saved herself from hardships in the competition and is determined to keep going, determined to live. Meanwhile Box has been dead inside MePhone4 this whole time, never having attempted the escape route, Box had given up and resigned herself to staying here, but Suitcase gave her the confidence and motivation to live.

Suitcases whole story is a mental health allegory, and throwing Box into the mix shows us that if you’re struggling with bad thoughts, someone else has been in your shoes and has gotten through it, and they are here to help you through it, too.

With context of Box’s drowning, Suitcase’s hallucinations get even more complex, and I wonder if the other “Box&Case Clones” died or experienced trauma in the other ways seen in her hallucinations (stalactites falling in the caves, Meeple interference with Mecintosh, etc). It makes me wonder where those other characters went, what did they do with their lives? Did MePhone4 kill them? I doubt it, but where did they end up?? Many questions.

Anyways in terms of how the fandom will see them…

I think that because of this, ppl are gonna ship and headcanon them in a variety of ways, I fear about the shipping wars with them, and I urge everyone to be civil because so far everything is up for interpretation with them. I can see ppl shipping them, I can see ppl saying it’s selfcest, I can see ppl saying they’re siblings, I can understand all of those points and it worries me because I’ve seen how y’all act with enforcing your headcanons that have less ground to stand on, or saying perfectly fine ships are problematic. I’m setting the record straight before this shit starts; Boxcase is ok to ship. They are different enough to where it’s not really selfcest (not that selfcest is horrible, see ColeyDoesThings vid of SelfCest), and a headcanon is simply a headcanon, it’s your opinion and it is NOT fact.

Happy shipping Yuri lovers, and happy headcanoning, we can coexist.

[norazingrid]

Testmic analysis because people don’t get their relationship, like, at all

I’ll go over these points below

why test tube and microphone aren’t actually toxic

test tubes character arc and how it involves mic

their great potential and similarities with each other

conclusion

OKAY FIRST UP I WANT TO GET SOME THINGS CLEAR

I do NOT ship these two because they’re both “girls” and I am NOT picturing them as “what if they didn’t hate each other”

I've always considered their complex relationship and so called “hatred” towards each other, but I’ll explain more of it below

Test tube and microphone don’t actually have a “toxic” relationship

Now the word “toxic” can be a very strong word when describing a dynamic and I personally think that it is not the right one to use when describing their relationship because the both of them haven’t shown actual deep hatred towards each other. Sure, their dynamic isn’t exactly on “good terms” and test tube has made it pretty clear that she hates microphone, but has microphone actually shown any hatred back? No. She has always stayed quiet whenever test tube complains about her, which could be a sign on guilt. That means microphone knows the reason why she hurt test tube and understands why she’s upset about that. The lab and inventions were very dear to test tube, and microphone was convinced to steal from her and somehow “leak” her secret lab, but its pretty clear microphone regrets all of those things, and therefore she does not hate test tube.

And I would like to talk about how test tube would actually be able to forgive microphone at some point in the future, I’ll go over it in-

test tubes character arc and how it involves mic

Test tube’s character is very interesting to me because it has changed a lot during the seasons, but I’ll try to summarise it as quickly as possible. In s3 she has been seen to be pretty average and calmed down from the events that happened in episode 14, which is understandable since it happened a long time ago, but this started to change when cabby and test tube started to develop their rivalry. I’m not gonna dig too deep into this but I want to focus on how test tube STILL forgave cabby after learning her true intentions at the end of the season and I believe this could be a sign of how test tube stars acknowledging that she could learn not to judge everyone right away if they did something wrong, and I believe test tube could be starting to feel guilty aswell, not only for how she treated microphone but basically all bad moments she has had in past situations with other contestants. May I also remind u guys that test tube is stated to be socially awkward, so I don’t want to blame her for the way she acted with other contestants, but there’s always room for improvement and I would be happy to see test tube prove herself more, just like she did after forgiving cabby and voting for her to win iii.

their great potential and similarities with each other

Now I personally think that their arc could be one of the most interesting ones in the series if just given some more chance, because these two are actually very similar if you think about it. They both have been somewhat been turned down by their teammates, which gives them more willingness to prove them wrong. Test tube has been seen to be too “into the role” especially in episode 14, which might also be because her best friend was literally kidnapped by aliens, but when fan was saved, she was still not satisfied, which destroyed her respect she had from others. And the reason why she wasn’t satisfied is because microphone got all the credit. But microphone didn’t mean to steal her reputation, since she was against hurting anyone in the first place. The plot-twists in their arc’s are so entertaining, it makes it even more fun to study. And if we get to see these two characters making up somewhere in the future, it would complete their arc perfectly. Happy ending yay

Conclusion

Microphone doesn’t hate test tube, but rather feels guilty for what she did to her.

Test tube has now proved us that she is willing to forgive someone if knowing all point of views.

Their arc hasn’t ended yet, and much more depth could come out in the future between these two characters.

thanx for reading please correct me if there were any mistakes in my takes 😁

end of analysis✌️

[mikokiara]

Taco's character is literally the song 'Engeki' from project sekai and THIS is the hill I will die on.

[starrysymphonies]

I HAVE to share my thoughts on the new ii episode with Balloon and Nickel ok

!!SPOILERS AHEAD!!

Preface!!: I know I’m known to be a nickloon shipper in the past but I discovered Balloon is canonically arospec and!! Oh my god he is just like me!!!! I don’t care what anyone else ships as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone, but Nickloon’s (or any balloon ships) just not my cup of tea anymore

Let’s get into it!! Yippee!!!

I’ve been in situations similar to this before. Where something bothers you but you can’t tell the person because you’re scared that if you speak up about it they’ll get mad at you (in this case, have Balloon lose his alliance + possibly get voted out), or they’ll find a way to blame you.

To my understanding, Balloon was acting this way out of self preservation. He didn’t want to be alone again, be without an alliance again, so he pretended like everything is fine

Thank you fake suitcase!!!! He could just say sorry!!!!!! Also here, Nickel is moving on from the past without ever trying to rectify his mistakes. It’s important to move on, yes, but first you have to acknowledge and apologize and make up for what you did wrong

Tumblr has a photo limit so I’ll reblog with a part 2!!

[monzterbatz]

thinking about the relationship between bot and mephone oh my god (analysis post)

so, it's known how it's heavily implied bot is mephone's favorite contestant in iii, right? there's quite a bit of evidence to back this up:

• "listen yinyang, you're great. possibly my second favorite contestant still here!" <- well, what's his first favorite?

• when bot gets eliminated: "any chance you'd... want to co-host?" mephone obviously wants them to stay and is upset when they DO leave:

• "that's what happens when two alliances get SO caught up in their own drama, that they force out the greatest player!" <- he thinks they were the greatest player out of everyone in iii

• + him standing up for them with the springtastic contract ofc ("i don't like how they treated you.")

well yeah, that's all nice and dandy, you may or may not have realised that already, but then you think about... why specifically is bot his favorite out of everyone? well...

what if it's because bot is the only contestant that mephone didn't make?

what if its because they werent restricted by his creativity and basic personality ideas/stereotypes like how the others were made, outside of the narrow mindset he inherited from watching just reality tv in his past? what if it's because bot is also a robot that was made for a specific purpose, just like him? what if he looks up to the fact bot found themself and CHOSE who they were, something that mephone always wanted to do but couldn't because of cobs?

mephone looks up to bot because they're something that he always strived to be; something unique. they might even have felt more alive to him subconsciously, which is ironic cause they're a literal robot, but that also makes them familiar to him in a sense; mephone grew up in solidarity next to a bunch of lifeless or barely sentient technology and no people from the outside world except for steve cobs (which is DEFINITELY not saying much) so to see another robot that's actually full of life must be something new to him, something special

oh yeah also the fact bot had actual good parental figures 😭 definitely something mephone wishes he has

it's honestly quite heartwrenching to see the parallels between the two, and the fact bot might be one of the only ones who survived after ii17 makes it hurt so much more considering both of them lost everyone else they cared about; they're both kinda in the same boat in some ways

but yeah thats abt it, thank you if u read this far lol 🙏 making analysis posts like these r rlly fun these two r silly

[snailfen]

salt and pepper crumbs lets GO!!! I need need neeeeeed to see salt struggle to break out of her code and struggle with defining what parts of her are really her and what parts were things mephone made her with. I like thinking about what would cause her to make that look inwards and make that change, especially since it looks like she's one of the few who haven't broken away from their original code.

my guess is, pepper obviously! brian has also said that salt needs pepper more than she realizes. maybe pepper is the one to get her to change. she wants what's best for salt and she recognizes that salts self-absorbed behavior isn't good for salt herself. but I think she's scared that by trying to open up a conversation about this, salt might not react well. this is part headcanon honestly so take this next part of speculation with a grain of salt (teehee) but. I feel like paper and pepper are at least implied to be friends! i'd like to think that they both started sharing their problems salt and oj with each other as pepper grew to realize the world doesnt revolve around salt, and paper started feeling undervalued as oj became more and more self-centered. and seeing oj actually reflect on and listen to the frustrations paper expressed with him, even in the midst of a MUCH bigger problem, I would think that could give pepper hope that she could open up to salt about the issues she has with her as well.

[fansblogs]

fan is a narcissist. isn’t it wonderful.

Fan and NPD: The ultimate masterpost. Or something.

Hello! First time posting something this long, so forgive me for any possible inconveniences. The purpose of this post is to explain the grounds of my headcanon and correlate this disorder to Fan, whom I believe showcases it spectacularly, as well as educating on NPD along the way. This does not mean that Fan having NPD is “canon” by any account, but he most certainly displays traits of it, and it’s something I personally believe he has!

Disclaimer that this post is being made by a questioning narcissist. If you associate NPD with abuse, demonize narcissists or so on, please block me. Disorders do not make anybody inherently evil!

..in the making of this, I forgot that tumblr had video limits. To overcome this, I’ve linked most of the scenes I’ve been using for reference when making this post! There’s plenty of times where I start to describe certain scenes, so make sure to click on the link to avoid confusion. Sorry for the inconvenience!

If this format is too cluttered and/or confusing; here’s also the Twitter version of this post.

Lastly, if any PWNPD have things they want to note or add, go ahead!

tags: @moonlightcanyon @box-of-lemon-nys

All of this information is taken straight from the DSM-5. I don’t support nor endorse the ableist view of NPD shown in the DSM, but for the sake of simplicity I’ll be referring to it, as it’s the official diagnostic criteria.

As per the DSM, NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is defined as “a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts.”

Fan displays all of these traits outstandingly overtly, yet in such a way most people wouldn’t recognize as narcissism. Starting with the first;

“Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements).”

This has been pertinent since his appearance in S2. In fact, the first line he even speaks in the season is a proclamation of his believed superiority. Fan has based his identity on being the BEST, the #1 fan of Inanimate Insanity. 

Though there’s way too many examples of his grandiosity to compile completely, one of my favorites is this theory shown in EP 7, which perfectly displays these behaviors.

He’s confident that his theory is right, that each team will always win twice in a row. Though he provides proof, he notes “Not like you need it, right?”, showing that he believes his word is more than enough to prove something correct. Last but not least, his favorite episode (at the time) was Episode 3, the one where HE won the challenge for his team.

Again, just for the sake of simplicity, i’m picking and choosing scenes so I don’t have to note down every single time he displays this symptom.. but please keep in mind that this is a VERY obvious trait he shows almost constantly.

Though this side note isn’t really intended to be “evidence”, it feels relevant to mention that later in the series, Episode 14 becomes his favorite Episode, yet again another episode focused on his growth and accomplishments. 

Another thing important to mention here is that narcissists are SEVERELY sensitive to criticism, which we see multiple times with Fan. Episode 2 of Invitational illustrates this very well with Fan’s reactions to both Cabby’s files and her own spoken criticism of him, even refuting it by blatantly denying his negative behaviors and defending his knowledge. (Timestamp 3:39-3:58)

2. “Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.”

I’d say that this is perhaps the least evidenced of all the traits, but nonetheless, there are a few instances of this. Most relevant to me is Fan’s enjoyment of fanfic, especially the RPF he posted of him and MePhone. 

Fan has a VERY, VERY complicated relationship with MePhone. But considering the idolization he has for him, this very much reads as a narcissistic fantasy in my mind. Becoming closer to a person with such power and influence, a person you personally admire and hold great respect for their accomplishments and believe would reach out to you due to your own assumed superiority absolutely falls into the criteria of narcissistic fantasies, something Fan shows very clearly here.

3. “Believes that they are “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions).”

This symptom is heavily varied on presentation, and isn’t as cut-and-dry as “wants influential acquaintances.” In my personal experience, this is more akin to your own personal hierarchy, only caring to bond and make an effort to associate with those whom are higher in the hierarchy. 

Fan is no stranger to this. He has a clear disdain for many of the contestants and subtly belittles them, such as Lightbulb, Paintbrush, Dough, or Paper. This is not that Fan necessarily dislikes any of his teammates or acquaintances, but he sees them as worse than him, which leads to a proneness of conflict due to his indifference towards their emotions. This also leads into the low-empathy in Section 7.

Meanwhile, someone Fan DOES view as “special” is Test Tube, what one would call a CHP/FP (Chosen Person / Favorite Person). He values her input and greatly idolizes her, and of course, is HEAVILY dependent on her. I can’t even begin to explain the intricacies of their relationship in such a small paragraph.

And in a rare case of Fan refusing to associate with institutions rather people, Episode 5 he remarks that he doesn’t want his egg to hatch into a “sub-par, bowless season”, an obvious projection on his end.  (Timestamp 1:32-1:38)

I don’t think he would’ve legitimately made any actions to leave the game given that Bow didn’t appear (despite him assuming that his first interaction with Bow was nothing but a trick of MePhone’s), but his indirect threat of not wanting to be in the game without Bow, finding it too inadequate for him, still stuck with me.

4. “Requires Excessive Admiration.”

Alongside #2, this is probably the other most difficult trait to explain on the list. Fan’s no stranger to subtly fishing for compliments, but that’s the exact problem with him. He’s so subtle that many of the contestants in fact MISS his social cues, and Fan ends up being ignored or degraded instead. 

Despite this, it’s clear that he expects praise and admiration from all, even if others don’t outwardly show it often. In the rare not-so subtle cases of Fan looking for acclamation, he outwardly asks for it to boost his ego, motivation, and most of all- excitement, as shown in Nickel’s FFF. (Timestamp 0:16-0:23)

Most of the time however, Fan places himself in positions that could give him commendation, one of my favorites being this short exchange from the Purgatory Stream. Fan has a lot of admiration for Marshmallow, and he tries to impress her with his offer, hoping for approval and kudos. (Timestamp 1:20:12-1:20:20)

(Short break here. Just wanted to mention how much Fan truly adores Marshmallow. Highly encourage anybody reading this to look into it if you haven’t already.)

Multiple times on Fan’s FFF’s, he’s attempted to do quips with his interviewees. In Nickel’s interview, he refers to these as his “fan instincts.” As I was saying earlier about these cues for praise being missed, both Nickel and Balloon react to his references with annoyance, in which Fan responds with aggression and disappointment respectively. In Balloon’s interview especially, it’s clear to see that he thought him referencing Balloon’s catchphrase would earn him a laugh and praise. (Timestamp 10:30-10:38)

5. “Has a sense of entitlement (i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with their expectations).”

Perhaps one of Fan’s least hidden symptoms. Again, a trait so glaring that it’s impossible to pinpoint every example.. but of course, my favorite display of this comes from one of the oldest pieces of Fan media, where he VERY clearly shows this. (Timestamp 0:14-0:38)

Though this short is dubiously canon, seeing it within the context of NPD makes a lot of sense to me. Of COURSE Fan’s personality would be far less nuanced when first created, hence his entitlement manifesting very overtly and negatively. Though it does mellow out over time, it never truly disappears, just seeps into different faucets of his personality and actions. (Timestamp 1:37-1:43)

Take here, for example. Fan tries to justify stealing from Cabby, but the truth is simply that he felt he deserved to see what she said about him, not asking her permission first. As Test Tube said, an invasion of privacy, a serious one at that when considering the later reveal of Cabby’s files being her memory aids. Alongside that, the grandiosity he highlights in this scene (think back to Section 1) is amazing. (Timestamp 0:42-1:01)

Just a bonus clip of Fan’s entitlement in relation to this specific conflict. (Timestamp 8:44-9:02)

In another more evident demonstration, Fan simply admitted to filming FFF without OJ’s permission, not even considering the possibility of needing to ask for acceptance to film and host a show inside of the Hotel. In his view, it’s something he wants, and with nobody encouraging against it, therefore it’s his right.

Another thing I really like about this post is how “innocent�� Fan comes across here. In my personal experience, entitlement has never been something I intend to be harmful to others, just something I feel I deserve because I am special, not even noticing my egotism with it. I don’t think Fan intended anything wrong with hosting the show, just assumed that OJ would be fine with it, and that he would have no need to ask for permission.

6. “Is interpersonally exploitative (i.e, takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends).”

Very much so! This is one you’d never note down when taking a first glance at Fan, but it happens to be severely true. The way the DSM words it makes it sound inherently malicious, but trust me that this is not commonly how this trait manifests. Everybody tends to be manipulative once in a while, and that doesn’t make it a necessarily negative symptom if utilized in ways that don’t harm others.

For Fan, one of the big signs of this is his tendency of sitting back and letting his team do the work. According to his patterns he’s guaranteed a win, therefore he finds he  has no reason to contribute, leaving his teammates to put in the effort to achieve it. (Timestamp 6:44-6:49)

Another thing I find I should add here is that Narcissists don’t usually intend for this manipulation to be.. legitimately evil manipulative. In our minds, we’re not doing anything wrong at all. So what if we use somebody as a means to an ends once in a while? There’s nothing wrong with it, especially if you deserve it. Fan is the same within this regard.

Funnily enough, this pattern of exploitation is a key factor of Fan’s character. Fan is THE #1 Fan of II, and as thus, must know as much about the show and its inhabitants as possible. He frequently uses the information and trivia he has collected about his fellows to steer them into giving him what he wants, no matter if it’s more information on themselves or a reaction, both things Fan finds severe intrigue and entertainment within.

Again, mentioning Nickel’s FFF (there is SO much to deconstruct there), Fan asks Nickel personal and invasive questions for his own entertainment, using Dime’s presence to utilize Nickel’s own self-confidence against him, prompting more honesty. (Timestamp 1:37-2:20)

Last but not least for this section, exploitation can be both conscious and subconscious. Though in my opinion it always seems Fan has some degree of lucidity, it’s clear from this blog post that it’s not all COMPLETELY conscious, some of his manipulative tendencies even flying over his own head. 

In this post he mocks a version of himself he believes is far from his own image, failing to notice how often he does take advantage of the others around him. In the end, it all boils down to intentions. This faux version of Fan is comically evil, and Fan believes his own personal intentions are nothing short of moral and understandable.. thus his manipulation not coming across as remotely manipulative to himself, just something he deserves.

7. “Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings or needs of others.”

A DEFINING characteristic of him. There’s so much to delve into with this specific aspect of his character, it’s practically infinite. For starters, Fan holds zero to none respect for everybody around him, viewing most of the people in his life as nothing more than simple characters.

There’s certain people who break this mold such as Test Tube or Suitcase, but most are confined to it. Even with people that Fan admires, MePhone or OJ for example, he still views as playthings. At that, Fan’s general emotional and mental disconnect from the world feeding into his low empathy leads him into the practice of stalking, in which both MePhone and OJ happen to be targets.

My favorite moments of Fan exhibiting his low empathy always tend to be when he’s alongside Paintbrush. This scene in Episode 7 really puts this into perspective.. despite Paintbrush’s outburst and clear distress, Fan sees their frustration as nothing more than laughable, even predicting the time it would take to happen. (Timestamp 12:50-13:03)

Even Paintbrush momentarily pauses in their outburst, shocked by his insensitive reaction. Later, they threaten Fan with the idea of smashing Baby Shimmer, an impulsive action in the blindness of rage. It really speaks to me how even though Paintbrush was too highstrung to adequately try to analyze Fan’s reaction, they still subconsciously realized that trying to get Fan to empathize with them was near impossible, choosing to instead threaten him in efforts of arising understanding.

Same kind of situation here. Fan only cares about Paintbrush’s emotions when Paintbrush punches him to the ground. This concern is completely unrelated to empathy of Paintbrush’s anger, merely just a self-preserving meekness in fear of being attacked again. And after Fan notices Paintbrush’s “cliche”, his attention is entirely diverted and he instead only focuses on this new discovery, again finding no meaning in Paintbrush’s emotions as his priorities are higher. (Timestamp 9:04-9:20)

Though this quote is more about Fan’s disconnect and escapism, it does highlight his apathy to others as well. I think there’s bits and pieces to be said here about Fan’s low empathy, even if not directly related to it’s portrayal in this context.

8. “Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of them.”

This symptom, just like majority of the others, is a key trait Fan exhibits. Time and time again, Fan flaunts spiteful and petty behaviors. Especially when provoked, Fan quickly finds himself vindictive and jealous. Though I do believe Fan’s grandiosity makes him believe that he has enviable characteristics, he tends to more outwardly show his jealousy toward others rather than vocalizing the assumed envy others have for him.

As I’ve referenced multiple times over, Episode 2 of Invitational is prime grounds for Fan analysis. This scene in particular shows such an evince of jealousy. Cabby first insults Fan’s formation of his identity, with an implied superiority of intelligence on her side. Watching his reaction is fascinating- first frustration, doubtful vulnerability, anger, then lastly disbelief.

Now, of course, this doesn’t exactly SEEM like jealousy, more-so defensive rage. Yet, it’s both! Fan has a lot of respect for how Cabby plays the game and her general self-image, admiring how professional and knowledgeable she comes across. Considering Test Tube’s proclamation of adoration for Cabby upon their first meeting, Fan instantly marked Cabby as somewhat of competition. 

Though he initially pursued a friendship with Cabby, he was quicker to turn on her than Test Tube, due to what I believe to be jealousy. Yes, Cabby is smart, but part of the reason Fan felt entitled to steal from her to prove that he is vasty more intelligent.. making a point that Cabby's notes on him are surface-level and nothing as good as Fan himself could create. When Cabby's file showed criticism of him, he took it even more personally than anticipated, because not only did her notes happen to belittle him, but also were severely impressive.

And as I said, during their confrontation with Cabby, Test Tube’s reaction seemed more disappointed and shocked with Cabby’s assessment of her, far more calm than Fan’s obvious anger. Again, Cabby is deprecating Fan in a way that makes her come across as far more impressive than him, far more mature and intelligent to the both of them. Not only is Cabby damaging Fan’s pride, but he sees her own self-presentation as a threat to how Test Tube perceives HIM.

This little interaction is quite a parade of envy. Vexation and jealousy tend to happen at the same time, something that’s very obviously shown here. (Timestamp 13:08-13:13)

At the end of the Episode during Fan’s elimination, Fan takes the news FAR more calmly than one would expect. Yet, this is mostly a facade, one to make himself seem far more composed and impressive than he actually is; by being so envious of Cabby, he holds himself to coming across just as dignified as she does. In matter of fact, Fan and Cabby share many of the same traits despite how differently they may manifest between them, and Fan sees part of himself in her. And for Fan.. my, is it terribly demeaning to meet somebody who’s  like you but BETTER. The envy he holds is gnawing at his core.

9. “Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.”

As expected, a Fan special. I honestly wish I had more commentary on this symptom, but it’s so blatant and pertinent throughout his entire runtime on the show that I can’t offer up much variation that isn’t already obvious enough.

Citing this scene for example, this is clearly arrogance mixed with jealousy. Not only does he believe he’s far better than what Cabby has said about him, but he’s also jealous that Cabby comes across as more intimidating than him. (Timestamp 5:00-5:11)

Another really good presentation. His haughtiness causes him to act defensively, attempting to reassure to both himself and the Shimmers that he is in fact a threat bigger than them. When met with even more denial of his self-assumed daunting, he merely pushes it out of mind, believing that yes, he has fearful qualities about him and that his “lower score is preferable.” (Timestamp 12:05-12:30)

-

As per the DSM, NPD is diagnosed when patients meet 5 out of the 9 traits. In the case of this essay.. I managed to correlate Fan to all 9 symptoms. Though some are certainly more pervasive than others, I do believe Fan meets the full criteria… Which brings me to the end of my essay!

I have SO many thoughts about this that I couldn’t all squish into this already lengthy post. Please feel free to ask me anything about this at all, as somebody with a special interest in Fan, I could go on for HOURS.

And last but not least, if you have any questions on the topic of NPD (related to Fan or not) I’d also absolutely love to answer!

And with that.. Fan is absolutely a narcissist. Thanks for listening <3

[skiddlecat]

fucking with me that when they first meet, mic is very much the insecure one while taco shows immense confidence, but by the end of their friendship mic has become very sure of herself meanwhile taco's hidden fears and insecurities are ultimately what pushed mic away. good lord this 🌮 has problems

[kebowyre]

wow more on my game over au. anyways in the au i decided to give mephone4 a lot of physical injuries and situational issues so i can delve more into his character. in the original show MePhone4 desperately needs other people for his horrendous mental state but pushes everyone away and chooses not to get help due to him being afraid of showing vulnerability, but in this au he doesn't even have the choice to NOT very dependant on other people, seeing as hes lost 98％ of his memory, doesn't know anyone or his surroundings and just generally.doesnt know, is half blind, cant stand or walk by himself due to his leg injury etc he relies on other people a lot more than he would in the og universe. and this reliance makes him feel like a burden and insecure which just makes him need them more. so yeah after that yap paragraph heres the actual art its oj helping mephone walk

[maxphilippa]

so i wanna talk about the trailer and the details that are shown there,

so:

- Taco is apparently trying to apologize to Pickle. We don't know if the scene in which Baseball finds both of them together means that Pickle let them in, or if Mepad managed to teleport both of them on an empty room so that Taco could get prepared. Judging by Pickle's expression, it is rather unlikely that he let them in, but it could still be a posibility. By Taco's state we can pretty much see that she's not mentally there, and that the scar on her asset is back, indicating that this is a permanent scar. Mepad is most likely comforting her.

- Mic is shown to be relaxed and happy genuinely after all of the horrors she went through on the show. It seems like she has finally seen Balloon after forever, this probably means that Balloon got back to the Hotel shortly after Mephone4 went back to s2. We don't know where Nickel is, but it is likely that he'll also have an scene on the ep, as there it looks like there's going to be a lot of grandslams focus on the ep.

- Balloon is finally accepted to a party.

- But the Bright Lights seem to have quite an important role nonetheless. If you have noticed it, they're especifically on the part of the Contestant Grounds in which Paintbrush burnt all of the flora after Mephone4 gave them a 0/10 for their Cobs painting. This could probably imply that they're working with some Meeple related bussiness, and Test Tube seems to be holding something that is... a sensor, it is likely that they're looking for something or someone in specific. This is also shown by the fact that Test Tube and Paintbrush are probably working together on this one.

- This one is pretty obvious, but this is a parallel with 3gs' first introduction.

- We know Suitcase and Knife are on the sky, yet we don't have much of a clue regarding why. I have some thoughts about this, but my biggest theory at the moment is that the challenge MAY be retrieving Toilet, or something Meeple-related, since the clouds are pink, just like the Meeple ones. We do not know for sure, though, but since the atmosphere is very tense, and the fact that they're most likely talking about the alliance might imply a thing or two.

- Mephone4 wants to finally put an stop to Cobs, but he knows he can't do it alone. So he's asking Mepad for help. However, it seems that Mepad has fully settled down for stopping to work with Mephone4, since Mephone4 never listened to him, and Mephone4 respects that decision of his, but asks Mepad to not do it for him, but for the contestants instead. I think that the data of Brian saying that Mepad "very clearly cares about these contestants" will have a lot of weight on the next episode.

[smile-files]

i almost forgot i was right in the middle of the ii3 finale???? more analysis with context from ii16. this is a long one!!

how springy talks about spring-bot like an itty bitty baby is reminiscent of how cobs infantilizes mephone and how bot themselves is also kind of infantilized... there's a point here about how having consciously created someone makes them feel like less of a person and more of an object in relation to you, with less human agency. you're the parent, and they're your child. the dual definition of "child" as both offspring and youth really plays a part here. even if your creation is mature, they'll always be a child to you, if you know what i mean.

interestingly, springy singles spring-bot out from the other spring-toys. as we know now, there is something more "real" about bot than the other contestants in that they weren't created by mephone, in that they are consciously aware of their creation and purpose and can thus choose their own path in that context. springy has fixated on bot ever since they first interacted; does springy somehow know they're the one exception?

and speaking of exceptions, bot is one of the only two nonbinary characters on the show, and given how they only came out as such right when the only other one was eliminated (paintbrush), they went on to feel really alone in that for a while; this is tied into the symbol that is bot being, well, a robot, which they are also alone in. bot had a whole speech to n/a about how both of them are "the only one of their kind" in a sense, and how there should be more of them, but for now they can find solace in the other people who'll support them anyway.

but springy is artificially making more of bot's kind, more robots artificially aware of being robots, more symbolically queer people. springy is terribly misunderstanding what makes bot special: they weren't programmed to be nonbinary, or programmed to be self-aware, or programmed to behave like someone aware of the fact that they were programmed... no, that's something bot did themselves. bot could've chosen to live forever under the guise of bow, under the guise of their "purpose"; but who bot is as a person, everything springy fixates on and fetishizes and wants to recreate, is everything bot wasn't created to be.

"i wish this was a mask!" ...bot realized they were being forced to wear the "mask" of bow, being forced to fulfill a "purpose", and was able to choose who they were because of that realization. but springy is denying that his purpose is any different from who he is: it isn't a mask he puts on. according to him, springy is indistinguishable from his purpose. springy idolizes bot's self-discovery, but doesn't believe in the agency behind it - and so springy wants to artificially recreate it without any agency involved...

...but in trying to do so, springy is undermining that self-discovery entirely. they clearly desire the ability to defy purpose, but they simultaneously submit to it, and thereby see purpose as a worthy means to an end: just as test tube and fan imposed the purpose of "being bow" on bot, springy is imposing the purpose of "being bot" on spring-bot.

springy is still caught up in the idea of "purpose", even if he thinks that idea is bad, something especially apparent when he begs for approval of having fulfilled his purpose of being helpful and making others smile.

springy, following their interaction with cabby about spring-bot, realizes they can be more than just their purpose; however, as the spring-toys were made while springy was still following his original purpose, and were thus made to take down mephone, they still obey walkie talkie in doing so.

in this episode, walkie talkie and springy talk a lot about their own "purpose", what they were "built" to do. there are a lot of implications that these two were also created by mephone, though definitely not consciously; they're more so projections of some of his inner desires, like having the show continue indefinitely or having it be lucrative (and treating the contestants like "toys" in a sense).

springy takes pride in being more than just his purpose; walkie talkie, meanwhile, takes pride in still having her purpose and still fulfilling it.

as walkie is antagonistic toward mephone, he immediately assumes she's working for steve cobs -- which is strikingly similar to his accusation of toilet working for cobs. toilet wasn't antagonistic, no, but he was incredibly annoying to mephone; and we know from the ii14 ending scene, and with the current context, that toilet was made by mephone (as he was attacked by mephone x and presumably deleted). walkie, too, was made by mephone; we get this thru-line here of mephone despising people who bother him, people who are really extensions of himself... people who want to defy what they were made for, but have difficulty doing that...

really, we don't know how much mephone knows now; he knows that, to some extent, these people's purposes revolve around him, but i'm not sure if he'd be fully clued into the fact that he made them. in any event, this is all a troubling revelation to him.

weirdly, while the other spring-toys deactivate when walkie talkie is turned off, the toy version of bot doesn't. well, given how spring-bot was programmed to defy programming, one would expect that it wouldn't "obey" being stopped. it's funny: effectively, spring-bot is more obedient to purpose/programming than the other spring-toys, because of its unnuanced defiance.

who is springy saying this to? spring-bot... or himself? he's sacrificing himself to save mephone, truly defying his purpose of being self-serving; he's ultimately choosing who he wants to be. we don't see spring-bot for the rest of the episode, so it's unclear what happens with it.

interestingly, though springy was created by mephone, mephone had to make a melife icon for them: springy didn't automatically have one. perhaps mephone technically has the capacity to regenerate anyone he creates, but he only naturally has the option to do so for his contestants? cuz reasonably, they'd be the ones dying over and over in his challenges?

at the same time, though, didn't dough turn into a ghost because he died before mephone created a melife icon for him? my theory is the following: if a person mephone creates dies before having a melife icon, mephone has a short window of time to create their icon and regenerate them before it's too late, at which point they'd die permanently and turn into a ghost.

balloon seems surprised that mephone's able to recover a non-contestant; as it is, now that mephone knows he can do so (on account of what walkie said), he does do so.

mephone comparing himself to cobs!! his seasons as his creations!!! something something that cool "we both reached for the gun" ii amv. you know.

i love how ambiguous his wording is here. "responsible [...] for these guys" could mean anything from mephone being in charge of their safety and happiness to being the reason they exist. and he's saying he's "responsible" for more than just his contestants, and that he "can help them, too"; does "them" refer to his contestants, or to whatever it is he's referring to aside from his contestants? is that folks like walkie talkie, springy, toilet, etc? those non-contestants he made and whom he knows revolve around him, even if he doesn't know directly that he created them? so many double-meanings here.

...

i've been able to understand the unvitational committee a lot more this time around, especially walkie talkie and springy; knowing their motivations and "purpose" in the context of ii16 makes it a lot more meaningful. the ii3 finale overall was pretty well-written i believe! not my favorite part of the season, but it wrapped it up pretty well, i think.

i must apologize to ii3! i used to be so negative about it all... but it's actually pretty darn good. very flawed in a lot of ways, certainly, and those flaws make me very mad (the way the show treated bot and cabby in particular), but the season overall is enjoyable and fascinating, and it fits into the lore very well :) love you ii3!!

[drawingoddessy]

Hyper-analysis of Lightbulb season 2 episode 12

Part 2

And cue escapism.

She sees this and most likely got reminded of the game back home.

She literally recoils.

But then she shakes it off because in this reality she doesn’t have to worry about that. She’s willing to stay here forever. The lyric “I’m finally feeling free” insinuates that this is the first time she feels not trapped in her role.. Maybe doing this challenge 2 seasons in a row, with growing tension and emotions makes Lightbulb feel trapped within her persona of “the silly one”.

More escapism!

This entire song just talks about how Lightbulb is finally happy with the reality she made. It was her escape from the stressful life of competing. Here she no longer is the only one thats impulsive and unserious. Unlike how in the reality she's in where she is surround so many different personalities, where she clashes with her friends and fails to connect with others due to her "oddness"

But here she won't ever fail at a relationship, not if they are all like her.

After the song we cut to Lightbulb talking to the Inanimate Insanity Infinity. We see Lightbulb attempting to confide in them.

This is first time (to my knowledge) that we rlly see Lightbulb vent to others. She probably never wanted to vent to the others because she didn’t want to show her more sad side. Maybe she doesn’t think they can cheer her up? But these people are just like her, so maybe they’ll know how to?

Until they start spewing nonsense to her.. mirroring how Lightbulb usually attempts to help. This shows her directly how her methods are percieved by others.

Yk how I said they’re just like lightbulb? Well.. they do miss one thing.

Testtube can also symbolize Lightbulbs own logic and emotional side (and vice versa, the arc’s parallel).

Eliminating the logical, emotional ones can possibly symbolize exactly what Lightbulb does to her own negative emotions. She purges them only allowing the silly ones to stay and be present.

They get snapped to Elimination, the thing Lightbulb hates.

As much as she wishes to stay in this ideal world. She sees Testtube in danger and she goes to put a stop. This is when Lightbulb tries to gently and lightheartedly stop them because that’s what she’s used to. This can also be her actually trying to be serious but struggles to do so.

This is the best place to talk about what I mean when the contestants miss one thing..

They miss Lightbulbs negative human feelings. The ones Lightbulb doesn’t want to have. But remaining 2 dimensional and unemotional make the contestants off and inhuman. Did she really want to be like that? So positive all the time to the point shes inhuman? This is how she is seen by the other contestants, overly happy, unserious.

She then realizes.. sometimes goofiness needs a balance and gets serious (in her own way). She tries to be serious-

-But they keep laughing.

LOOK AT THAT FACE- anyways I feel like another problem Lightbulb has is the fear of not being taken seriously due to her abnormal nature. And this is apparent in this one frame. The face shows as if she was proven right. They won’t take her seriously.

Testtube begins to get angry at lightbulb for her nonsense just like Paintbrush.

She begins to feel a negative emotion and instantly redirects it to something funny, because she probably now thinks that Testtube won’t take her seriously like everyone in here. That and

Another instance of people thinking she’s just nonsensical idiot that stumbles into solutions.

Ok so a bit to unpack. So it’s shown that Testtube struggles socially but we see that she’s better at emotional connection (shown in future episodes more of and later in this episode) Meanwhile Lightbulb tends to be social but struggle with emotionality. Lightbulb tries hard to understand and comfort others when in need but tends to not be good at it.. She does try. And contrary to Testubes belief, she fails, a lot. Evident in her relationship with Paintbrush. People find her insufferable, and she knows it. Another reason to escape to this future.

Onto the solution! This entire solution is a projection of how lightbulb began to see herself with paintbrush.

Paintbrush was the one that tried the hardest and “took care” of competition for the team (like how they say salt does to anger pepper)

Lightbulb sat back and goofed off.

Paintbrush was the evident leader of the group even though Lightbulb was the designated leader.

And in lightbulbs point of view that’s what she thinks others viewed her as, a parasite that latches on.

Previous part ———Next Part

[lilacs-stash]

Hey can we stop acting like Nickel is the cause of all of Suitcase's problems. Like not even in a defending him way this is just a disservice to her character.

It's implied she had anxiety since before the show, considering how she acted when Paintbrush called her selfish in Marsh on mars. Yeah ep2. Long before Nickel did anything besides be kind of rude.

In rain on your charade Suitcase said she'd never been under pressure like that before. The hallucinating really seems like a pre existing issue that was just never triggered until now, or they happened more rarely and Suitcase didn't realize what was happening until the show.

She has anxiety from the start she has a hard time standing up for herself the hallucinations are most likely a pre existing issue in some way.

And yes her relationship with Nickel being toxic made all these worse but Idk just. Let Suitcase have problems outside of him ig. She's more then just someone Nickel hurt.

[mikokiara]

My thoughts about Taco and Mic on episode 14 copied and pasted from discord:

(Autism warning undercut)

''this episode is very important for both taco and mic, and especially mic. So, like I have told you already, mic is a complicated one. Knife goes right to her, and in his own words is in a 'generous mood' and so he tells her to well, stop. To in his on words ''have some dignity'' mic simply says that her and taco are equals, she has a voice, no one is shutting her down and she isn't just being dragged along by her. Which, is true. However, knife simply says ''well...I guess you are pretty in synch'' leaving her, confused. Mic is someone that dwells on things I'd like to believe, and so knife's words very clearly get right through her. We have established since the start that mic is at her core really insecure, I didn't told you this but the moment she got the praise, approval and attention she wanted from her team thanks to taco- she was smug about it, had no problem with saying weird stuff about her teammates in order to make herself look better- her confidence skyrocket tremendously and for the first time she seemed to hold herself in a better regard than when she did back then, but in episode 14 there is absolutely none of that, mic's confidence has been completely shattered, test tube is angry at her for stealing her stuff (understandably so) and clearly doesn't trust her for her annoyance, her body language is awkward small, and maybe that's because this is how she feels, I believe test tube's anger and distrust of her was probably some blow to her ego and the way she viewed herself. Overall she is just, pretty exhausted in this episode and this time is easier for knife's words to get through her because of that, she is tired, and worried and even though she wants to believe taco- even though she has learnt to see a new side of taco, people often forget that she still didn't fully know her despite this. She knew now that taco does hide big feelings from her, she supresses them since they are clearly a sour subject for her, and so mic doesn't bring up the portal again. But now that they are here, and knife's words get through she feels above all- insecure. Even despite this her vision is clouded by her exhaustion and doubts she is scared, scared that knife is right, that she truly doesn't mean anything to her that she truly is dragging her along- that despite everything they went through together, she doesn't really see her as her friend.

And so, just like episode 12 she goes to taco, for reassurance, she asks her to please not use violence when they go to get fan, she wants her to promise her not to. She is insecure and scare and doubtful and so she goes to taco and hopes that she does something that proves knife wrong. Taco, gently puts away her hand, tells her that ''teamwork prevailed'' and wished to not promised anything because she wasn't sure if she could. They both smile, and get to the spaceship and it happens. She shoots fan and test tube- mic startled and enraged jumps in the way of taco's guns knowing that she wouldn't hurt her, the latter's gun faltering for just a moment and lowering down. When mic yells at her saying this wasn't part of the plan taco says back to her that aliens rarely are part of the plan and so she sends her to grab fan's body and go back into the competition grounds and she does

everyone is cheering, happy, except test tube of course. Is an scenario that mic dreamed about, dreamed to have, but never through these circumstances. She looks at the crowd with horrified eyes as taco's voice chimes in ''See? this is why you listen to me mic, delectable isn't it? finally...a taste of recognition finally I can finally-'' she cuts her off with a ''is that what you said to pickle?''

yeah this is not truly what she wanted was she? she yearned for approval? yes, for praise? of course. But she never truly wanted to hurt people- kill people to be more exact. It will surprise you the amount of people who don't truly dissect this scene on mic's part. Mic doesn't view herself in a good light, she never truly did, the perception she has of herself alongside her self-esteem is heavily dictated by what others think of her. And right now mic feels miserable, her confidence had already been shattered but in these moments what she thought of herself what she thought of taco the little good redeeming qualities she thought of herself to have are completely gone they have burnt away to a crisp. Her core belief is, doing things because they are the right thing to do. But in these moments- even though she wasn't the one to shoot test tube, to shoot fan, she still allowed it to happen, she truly didn't do ''the right thing to do'' this time around did she? test tube was right, she is a fraud, she is untrustworthy- and in her eyes she is horrible. Episode 14 hurts a lot from her perspective because not only she felt betrayed by someone she loved the self-esteem she managed to somehow ''fix'' for at least a little while has been dragged through the mud and right now, mic is small, and mic is useless and mic is someone that she herself is unable to be proud of.

I thought the reason she even cut off taco in the first place was mainly because of what knife told her. Again she was doubtful and insecure and was afraid that maybe he was right, her brain tormenting her with all those ''what if's'' of her situation, and so she went to taco looking for reassurance, reassurance that she would actually listen, reassurance that she actually values her. But to her this moment was the last straw, to her this was the confirmation that taco really didn't cared enough, that didn't saw her as a friend, that taco truly was dragging her along, as viewers we come to understanding- or well most people come to the understanding that this is really not true, mic is taco's entire world, I didn't mention it here but it was confirmed in a stream that she did all of these stuff out of fear, she feared microphone was doing all the work in the alliance and she wanted to prove herself to her, she wanted to show her she was useful- and its very coincidental that all of this happened the exact moment when I believe taco began seeing mic as a true actual genuine friend. She didn't only wanted to prove herself to her she wanted to show her that she was reliable, that her ideas worked, and that microphone could rely on her because she was her friend but of course, mic didn't know that, and there wasn't really a way for her to know that. She only scratched the surface with taco, she only truly knew so much of her because taco has a knack for hiding herself behind walls to prevent anyone to truly see her for who she really is, she tries to make herself look as an imposing and mighty villain but the truth is that is not really her, she is acting- that is another facade she truly is small and to an extend, scared- and most importantly, alone. It's understandable that mic didn't know what as an audience we know, and even then a lot of people fell through the misconception that she did so it really shows how hard taco herself can be to read sometimes, if even the people who are meant to dismantle her facade are falling for it. And so I believe that had knife not told her that she probably would have given taco an earful, but mic was tired in this and mic was scared and doubtful and not in a good place and so she weaponizes- her past relationship with people against her to hit a nerve, when she is hurt she hurts the other person twice as hard as shown in the same show with cheesy. Just like taco relapsed and fell back into old habits mic also relapsed and fell back into old habits she tried to leave behind because she was exhausted. My friend told me it really felt almost as if she was splitting on her and yeah I can see it, I feel if her mind was clearer in the moment she wouldn't have cut her off like she did maybe distance herself but not cut her off, but because she was tired and rightfully hurt, she just hurt the person she is cannonically the closest to, and makes the choice to leave the show behind. She looks 'relieved' but, I know that the moment she went through the elimination portal and got to the hotel, she broke down days later. I know because sometimes I say or do things that hurt other people when I perceive they hurt me and I regret it later and I feel she probably felt guilty afterwards. But that is so much about mic, what about taco? well

Taco has been lonely, for most of her life. She is hurt- and bitter and yet she regrets with all her soul what she has done. Her core trait is her guilt.

what can I say about taco in this scene? I talked to you about her motivations already, why she did what she did, the way she hides herself behind walls the way she avoids vulnerability almost as if it was poisonous venom to her. More than anyone she hates vulnerability, she does not enjoy looking weak, she does not like when people try to pry into her true feelings and its something that shines a lot in the episode next to this one, she answers to any attempt of trying to crack her open with either dismissal or anger. She does not like, being seen as who she is. Someone small, who needs help. This moment is the moment taco begins to be at her absolute lowest, I will remind you taco at her very core is lonely and she has been lonely for a VERY long time, microphone is the first one to truly see her- 'true self' and still want to remain by her side anyways, and defend her and she enjoyed her company she enjoyed being close to her she enjoyed being by her side as well and she truly held her in a high regard compared to other people, for then this same first genuine friend fading away into the distance right in front of her very own eyes, and so she is left destroyed and hurt and lonely and she doesn't know what to do with herself anymore. Taco's determination that is seen multiple times throughout the series was her downfall it backfired on her. Relentlessly sending letters to pickle in attempts to fix things with him for two years? had the complete opposite effect and it just didn't allowed pickle to properly move on from her and it ended up making him more resentful of her than she already was. Trying to meddle with the competition so she could get some of what she felt was stolen from her no matter the cost? completely destroyed her mental health and made her dig herself into a hole far deeper than before- so deep, she doesn't feel she can climb out of it. Trying to get mic immunity to not only prove a point but to show her she could rely on her? well...you already know the answer. There is of course SO much more to her than just that without counting episode 15 that is an episode solely focused on her, but this is as far as I'll talk with them because I'd like to get to episode 15 with you someday

right now, taco is hurt, and grieving and so awfully miserable. She has believed herself to be nothing but a villain a wretched creatured undeserving of redemption, and yet despite everything mic stayed, mic loved her and mic valued her. For then her to disappear because of one mistake that cost her everything. She is now truly alone and she is not coping well with it. Once again she just completely lost everything and she is too tired to fight to get it back this time, and so she disappear into the distance and we didn't know anything of her for like at least 4 years.

of course there is SO much more of her than this but, this is how I am going to leave it by now, they are both so tragic because they have cannonically been closer than anyone else in the series, they were both hurting and lonely and relied in each other to make up what the other lacked, taco deep deep down truly just wanted company, and mic just wanted to feel actually valued by someone, it was truly the right person at the most awful wrong time.''

[starrysymphonies]

THIS IS THE MILLIONTH TIME IVE TRIED TO POST THIS AND I THINK ITS BECAUSE OF THE READMORE SO IM SORRY IF YOU GET SPOILED SPOILERS AHEAD III EP 12

We all know these scenes in the episode, where Balloon compares himself to the butterfly

It’s confirmed further by Candle a little later in the episode

So then…

To Nickel, Box and Balloon were the most convenient allies in the moment. They were the only people he knew on his team, the only two returning constestants

This begs the question:

Does Nickel still see him that way?

[wrensartstash]

It's Soap Saturday so I bring you a(fairly scattered) Soap analysis

"Oh she only has OCD and no more she's written badly" I HAVE OCD AND WHILE THAT DEPICTION WAS EXTREMELY DAMAGING AND COULD'VE BEEN DONE BETTER, IT'S UNFORTUNATELY ACCURATE FOR SOME PEOPLE(it's me I'm some people). SHE OBSESSES OVER EVERYTHING AND BEING A SOAP BOTTLE PROBABLY DOESN'T HELP SINCE OBJECTS ARE EXPECTED TO ACT ACCORDING TO THEIR OBJECTS

She can't HELP IT!!! SHE TRIES TO GET BETTER BUT LETTING GO OF YOUR HABITS IS DIFFICULT ON YOUR OWN AND AGAIN, AS A BOTTLE OF SOAP, SHE PROBABLY FEELS MORE SOCIETAL PRESSURE TO BE GOOD AT CLEANING!!!! SHE FIXATES ON EVERYTHING BECAUSE IT'S ALL SHE FEELS LIKE SHE CAN DO TO HAVE ANY CONTROL OVER THE SITUATIONS SHES IN!!! Besides cleaning, she has ONE coping mechanism, and it's one that everyone else HATES(singing). So no WONDER she ends up just cleaning. For hours. And hours. And hours. To the point where it's irrational

ALSO THAT'S ANOTHER THING!! Having control over situations is very big for me, and fixating is one of those things that helps. For Soap, being in a clean space and cleaning the hotel helps her feel like she can actually be calm and helps control her emotions, because without her cleaning? The hotel would be in shambles! If SHE wasn't helping, then everything would fall apart!! Sure, this isn't reality, but for her? Someone who has tried again and again to make things better but just making them worse BECAUSE of her impulses? She needs to feel like she's doing SOMETHING or else she's nobody. Just another stereotype ignored by the narrative

It's not HER FAULT that she has OCD and it's not HER FAULT that societal pressures force her to be who she is. Besides, after Tissues got eliminated, she could've thought that SHE had a higher winning chance because he got eliminated for his trait being. Well. Sick. So, as the opposite, the fans should love her!! Right? So, she goes further, she puts soap on the pizza, she has a musical number while fixing the hotel, she does all of these things to not only give herself a sense of stability, but also to hopefully boost her appreciation from the audience

And it didn't work

The moment she STOPPED cleaning, it didn't work. She told Mic to listen to her heart when walking through the portal, but if we're being honest(and if we see the comics), she went right back to cleaning. The moment she tried to be less impulsive, she was eliminated. And there goes her control once again

As of now she's likely right back in that loop, cleaning endlessly despite being asked not to as it isn't needed, but she won't, because if she's not CLEANING, then she doesn't have a purpose. She can't just pick up a new hobby, this is her LIFE, and if she can't sing, then she only has one option left

Or maybe I'm just reading too much into a one note character, who knows

Happy Soap Saturday