#in the funniest of ways. and so yeah. yeah. <3< /div>
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i love everyone whos taking an interest to the sharks no matter what forces compelled yall <3 but also can i interest you in some of our guys that are older than 19 because i think the sharks truly excels at being the funniest collection of . guys, i guess
head coachs emotional support 2nd liner
last year (with david quinn) we had luke kunin as a second line center (hes a depth winger in teams that have more than five forwards and a dream). this year (with ryan warsofsky) we have jan rutta in second dpair . problem: they arent. good . theuy are CLOTH MOTHER!!!
we already have barclay goodrow at home
this is a quote from a tweet comparing kunin and goodrow but i CANT FIND IT...
i dont think we shoulda got barclay goodrow ill be real gang. i dont know what mike was doing here. anyways luke kunin is also our barclay goodrow at home (a bit of a goon, a bit of a leg weight) & we have barclay goodrow & warso loves sticking them together. & naturally theres some center with these two guys. (its currently will smith hockey)
the two old guys so to speak hook up
quoting this call from drew remenda regularly (~0:42 seconds in)
o captain my captain logan couture who has not touched ice since last season (but he played 6 beautiful games in our flop 23-24 season) && marc edouard vlasic (cousin of alex vlasic if you saw everyone getting pavlovian dog reactions every time they mentioned smaller pickle) who we last saw on ice last season...! theyre both out on injuries from the wear and tear of hockey and i honestly doubt we will see them again but i am incredibly fond of them.
heres some important things to know about marc edouard vlasic (pickles)! ^_^
divorced
yeah thats all i got for you
genuine question i have had for a while: how many of yall have never seen these guys on ice LOL
HOTEL CALIFORNIA!!!
oh my god we have SO many retired sharks that just. came back to work for the sharks. just off the top of my head:
mike grier (gm)
ryane clowe (assistant gm)
known landlords joe thornton (who is here for. vibes??? DOES HE GET PAID???) and patrick marleau (player dev coach)
tommy wingels (player dev coach)
mike ricci (player dev coach)
evgeni nabokov (goaltending dev coach) (not to be confused with goaltending dev coach thomas speer, known goalie whisperer)
mark smith (casting)
scott hannan (casting)
alex stalock (casting)
jason demers (casting)
david quinn has connections in the furry community (national hockey league) that could end your career in minutes
ex head coach dq (hes an assistant coach for the pens!) was really good at collecting guys from his prior teams, he used to be a coach for team usa in the olympics and for boston university . he knew gmmg (general manager mike grier) from bu! he also i know a guy'd his way to the pens!
funniest to me is henry thrun . dq WAMTED this guy . back in the college days ! see the thing is henry thrun we call him mr harvard. the one that got away NO LONGER...
swear to god theres another guy who dq ? i think ? loved SO much from his time with the rangers that he just kinda. snatched them with him to the sharks. BUT MY MEMORY IS BAD. I SWEAR IT HAPPENED. <- spent god knows how long paging through the shrimer
the san jose-new jersey highway
we keep collecting notable guys from new jersey... they arent even necessarily super notable IN jersey. mackenzie blackwood and vitek vanecek dont LOOK super good. i think both of them had insane injury records too?? and then we put them behind the sharks defense LMAOOOO
this post is written AFTER vitek vaneceks career record 49 save game BTW
ty equillibrium
did you know we traded away one ty (ty emberson) and also traded for one ty (ty dellandrea) . this is completely unrelated to anything .
the swedish mafia power struggle
we currently have five swedes: fabian zetterlnd, william eklund, alexander wennberg, carl grundstrom, and timothy liljegren ^_^
last season, it was a capital t thing that willyek was self appointing as head of the mafia with getting swedish meatballs at the rink (see previous link) and fabian zetterlund getting him coffee for his exit interview
alex wennberg as his senior IS challenging willyeks seating
riveting stuff. shout out to san jose shark media!
#san jose sharks#this ramble has been a nightmare for me and my ability to recall where i saw specific articles & the like#crackin this one outta the drafts ^_^
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“I just don’t get what your problem is! First you’re angry that I'm here, and then you get angry when I leave, despite the fact that you're the one who told me to. Did I just dream up that we’d gotten past that and learned how to be civil with— H-huh?!”
(Theirs is a rocky and confusing road.)
Bonus aftermath:
#i wasnt sure whether or not to post these so i put them in my drafts#but yknow what this is self indulgence hours#also this would be their first ever physical contact..... heh#and also last (for a very long time) (wont happen again until endwalker and garlemald)#i feel like i should add that the last edit was meant to be just one but they all looked so dramatic with the sun in the bg#in the funniest of ways. and so yeah. yeah. <3#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#ff14#final fantasy 14#hyur#midlander#magnai oronir#magnai oronir x warrior of light#magnai oronir x wol#au ra#xaela#wolship#wol#ffxiv oc#ffxiv wol#ffxiv screenshot#gpose#ieeha de verral#ieeha#nabaath-areng#idk how to format this post so you shall have to take it as it is
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wally learned something new today!!! why doesn't he show us what-
ah.
#hes so proud of himself <3#place your bets on who taught him this neat little gesture#scribble salad#welcome home#welcome home puppet show#welcome home fanart#welcome home wally#theres something endlessly entertaining to me#about mostly 'innocent' characters swearing etc#but like in a wholesome way?? they dont really know what it means they just Do It in the most earnest whole-chest way#its like little kids yelling FUCK#hell yeah little dude you go#funniest shit i stg.
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I know the König x secret admirer reader is not gonna be officially continued but I was wondering if you could maybe explore part of it😭 there’s a part that mentioned that König gets laid in the military and I was wondering how angsty it would be if reader found out?🤭
Yes of course! ^^ It would be angsty... and fluffy! These two are the silliest people who ever lived tbh 🩷🐥
König is young in this AU (around his early 20s) and wildly inexperienced compared to some of the other recruits his age.
His first time was with a girl who joined the army when König had been there for about 1.5 years already. Desperate as he was with hiding the fact that he’s still a virgin, he tumbled into bed with this lady after a night out at the bar. She thoroughly seduced him, and König’s instincts told him she was only looking for fun, but he went with her anyway because, well. Loneliness can kill you, you know?!
He tried to woo her a bit after that until it became quite clear that this woman was not planning to settle down anytime soon. If anything, she was looking for a new conquest – and it’s fine, totally fine, except that König had surrendered a tiny piece of his heart to her along with his dick... That’s just how he is, and it took him more than a few months to get over the fact that it was “just a shag” and he “shouldn’t take things so seriously”.
That’s also why he closed off from people again, decided to concentrate on work and training and gym – until our cute little angel stumbled into his life like the prettiest saving grace! König was a goner from the start because this girl's approach was very different, so gentle and sweet compared to grimy shot glasses and smudgy lipstick and raunchy jokes. It’s a given that he was a little shocked when she sent her that pic 🙄 reminding him of promiscuous women who are not looking for a soul but a body, but because he is what he is the first thing he did was crank things up a notch and send her a dick pic back…
Yes, he’s desperate, but he’s also an go hard or go home man and this time, König is relatively sure he’s dealing with a lovely, delicate soul. Someone who wouldn’t just leave him out in the cold after getting what she wants.
And everything is like a fairytale between these two until she finds out he’s not a virgin despite he seemed a bit… like one… (in this scenario I think reader is a virgin and she thought König was one too because of obvious reasons? lol) And it’s fine, totally fine for her as well, except that the image of König having the night of his life with some military babe is haunting her from dusk till dawn.
There’s bound to be some drama when she starts asking timidly whether she’s still there… Whether they see each other every day. If they talk to each other, if he trains with her, etc. What if they test rifles together, or go out again with the sniper crew and get drunk and König feels… a little lonely?
She knows he would never cheat on her, not in a million years, but knowing how much of a wet dog he is she can’t promise that she’ll be all calm and relaxed during weekends, knowing her boyfriend is out there, full of testosterone and heart, his heart somewhat susceptible to female influence… Maybe even good old seduction…
And what’s even worse is the jealousy, the envy.
What if she’s more badass than her? That doesn't take much... She must be fierce if she’s in the military, something completely different, a forbidden apple König might want to taste again. It’s maddening, and when she finally opens up about it to him, spitting it out one night when he asks what’s bugging his sweet angel, there’s a big fat silence that follows.
König can't even believe she has torn her heart to pieces over something like this, alone and upset and ashamed when she's a literal angel. He sits her nice and pretty in his lap and talks her ear off about how he has nothing against this woman, truly, but that she is nothing compared to his first (and hopefully last!) girlfriend. Their love could never be compared to what happened between him and that girl, these things can’t even be spoken together in the same sentence. If he’s completely honest, his first time was... disappointing. Awkward, humbling, a total drunken mess of which he remembers nothing except that the woman wasn’t completely present either and that he was ashamed that his first time had to be like this.
Honestly, he felt like he lost his virginity on the night when he came to see her. She’s everything he’s ever dreamed of, all he thinks about these days... It’s quite annoying, actually, because he’s supposed to concentrate on how the wind blows and that the ammo doesn’t get wet and that he’s properly concealed.
He could be lying in a ditch with dummy rounds whirling past him and all he could think about are her eyes and lips and giggling and tits and, and… that. How warm it is, how nice it is, how he would just want to curl himself next to her when he hops back to his bunk in the evening. Her smile is the last thing he sees before he dreams, her voice is what he hears. All the things she said, all those sweet, silly little things, chime in his ear before he sleeps.
And all the precious moments they’ve already spent together, the times he made love to her under the trees... There’s nothing like that in the whole world and if she thinks something else can top that she's even sillier than he thought. He could comb through all the continents and he would never find a girl like her.
So tell him again... Why would he go to a shot glass of saltwater when he has a jar of wild honey right here at home?
#lmao what könig doesn’t tell her probablyyy is that the lady is not interested in him either#she just hops from D to D so she barely remembers König even exists#he’s only a co-star in some stories she tells her friends#like “Ooh yeah that one guy had a horse cock but he fussed around with the condom so much I almost fell asleep haha”#“what was his name again? shit I can’t remember”#meanwhile our angel reader is ascending to the 7th plane with the help of the horse cock in question like “Köniii T^T”#always the funniest thing when a secret admirer gets jealous of his object of obsession who’s actually fucking enamored with their no 1 fan#König gets jettisoned to the sun everytime she so much as *looks* his way#like are you both completely utterly dense or were you just born this way…#<3 sillies
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thank you trans men
#genuinely most of the strongest and funniest guys I know are trans men#seeing masculinity embraced in a non toxic way is so incredibly refreshing and wonderful to see#especially seeing how the patriarchy pressures men to fit into very specific molds and how yall completely shatter them#like yeah keep pushing against the patriarchy kings go off#I know multiple cis guys who have been able to explore masculinity in a variety of different ways#all bc trans men showed them that they could while still being a man#but yeah thank you trans guys#I love you all <3
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They're all the exact same character to me,i'm 100000% serious
(@honeypotsworld)
#components:1.actual punks but love cute shit/people 2.brutal ass childhood trauma 3.which turned them into team parents 4.could kill god#5.autistic trans femmes 6.funniest mfs alive 7.deserve way more love in canon and fandom 8.were they troubled kids?yeah you could say that#they're so me-coded#percy jackson#stephanie brown#hobie brown#katara#black percy#latino percy#blasian stephanie brown#pjo#batfam#young justice#dead sidekicks force#the unbreakables#atsv#spiderman#atla geekery#punk!percy#pastel punk stephanie brown#punk katara#the anomalies#team parent percy jackson#team mom stephanie brown#team dad hobie#perlex#stephcass#kataang#💌
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word vomit anon back!!!
pirate majima game is funny...watching people complain abt rgg ruining majima is super funny because he's been a silly guy for like 7 games and a serious guy in one...can he not be silly again...just once more??? (also im sure this game is gonna be emotional in some way shape or form) also k3 heads stay in line yokoyama said it was coming one day he never said soon lol
'k3 heads stay in line' PLEAAASSEE VJLKEALKJ youre right tho i cant lie ....
on the real though yeah no like. majima can be serious at times but generally he's a zany guy, it'd be illegal not to capitalize on that in SOME regard
#snap chats#HI WVA WELCOME BAAAACCCCK#but yeah that isnt to say you cant love a silly character and the serious aspects of them ofc#it just shouldnt be unrealistic that theyd want to be a lil funny with him when thats a big part of his appeal#and rgg always has a way of sneaking in emotion into its games anyhow so theres surely gonna be somethin#my bestie's bet is that makoto's gonna be the real treasure majima finds in the end </3 and he wont even remember her this is so sad </3#id probably kms ill be tbh so im glad thats not gonna happen !!!!!#total topic pivot time cause i had the funniest interaction with my grandma's minister#he was visitin and we were alone in the kitchen and hes like 'has anyone told you you looked like the actress from beauty and the beast'#and i was like 'no no ones ever said that to me actually !!!" i think he was referring to sonoya mizuno thats the only one i could guess#but yeah he was just like 'can i get a picture with you my daughter loves beauty and the beast'#like chief im not sonoya mizuno but fuck it sure hwy not. ive always wondered what its like being a celebrity vajelkjal#funny day my fridays turning out to be i tell you that#anyway i say all this cause i think he had like shea butter hand lotion cause now my hands just smell like damn lotion#it distracting .. its a nice smell but still bruh my hands did not smell like thsi before they smelled like LAVENDER#ive met him only once before and when i did he told me i had a strong handshake and now this is the price i pay. shea butter hands
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I can sit and critique forever as I am the world's proudest hater but I do feel that a lot of the snark around Vengeful is just people crucially misunderstanding the point of the villains universe. it's fucking camp! everything is self aware and overdramatic and reads like a published (albeit very good) fanfiction. if you're in specific circles you absolutely recognise the tropes schwab is pulling from and the tongue in cheek references she makes and all of them are on some base level FUNNY. I don't think it can be read with 100% gravitas because as much as it is brutal and visceral and about extremely traumatized people desperately clutching onto each other because carrying on feels easier than trying something new, it is also a book in which the girlboss mafia leader queen gets taken out by a naked college quarterback . schwab likes nice and wrapped up endings and after dealing with stief and Muir it is a BREATH OF FRESH FUCKING AIRRRR
#vengeful ve schwab#in terms of crit her overexpansive casts mean that ppl like mitch who SHOULD be central get shoved into lampshadeland#but i did find the new characters entertaining if not endearing#mostly bc i did not expect them to be pleasant and they were not. june is ALSO a manipulative selfish evil shithead#the marcella thing... yeah ok she was erm. very 2016. but her dying immediately during her final hoedown was the funniest thing ever#i think despite the intent vengeful reads like a middle book in a trilogy Nd doesnt hold up on its own . but EYE would be fine with it#i do enjoy how victor never loses. im so sick of my protagonists dying in poignant ways give me my marvel movie dennis reynolds#vicious ve schwab#also the june/sydney 3 year thing was extremely weak and 1) how fucking old is june maam that is a MINOR 2)i thought the same abt eli#in book1 and he really pulled thru so well in this one i genuinely kind of forgot about the murders. fascinating dude. unfixable#like was the ending of vengeful terribly rushed and lackluster. sure but im genuinely not mad at all about it#its a very fun sandbox
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this is what i was referring to the other day btw.... she literally said well you people were annoying last time so fuck off i'm not doing it anymore.... and i stand with her <3
#i love the way she writes responses to people who are clearly annoying her... one of the funniest things about her fr#beth.txt#this post is from 2015 just fyi. so both 1 year pre tda and 5 years pre tlh#i don't know what characters she's speciaifcally referring to that she explicitly said their sexuality before the book came out. because i#wasn't there back then. but i CAN speak to the way she handled ty. which i WAS there for. and it was hilarious. you all really missed out#one of those things you had to experience in real time spanning years...#that was back when this franchise was still accessible tho. and you could get into it with minimal work#there were only like ten books back then....#ok ten is a lot but you have to understand that there are 21 now. AND sobh. and four more coming. AT LEAST.#not even counting all the holly black books that are not essential to the tsc lore PER SE. but actually they are. for REAL ones.#like i cannot imagine thinking you have a full understanding of cassandra's work and you haven't read holly's modern faerie tales or the sp#spiderwick chronicles. OR MAGESTERIUM.#god imagine being a cassie fan but you havent read the magesterium books.....#(me. i never finished them)#and then also you of course must familiarize yourself with the writing of cassie's collaborators on the novella collections.#so you also have to read hacking harvard. and 13 little blue envelopes.#and of couurse you have to do all of this concurrently with wearing a cheap fandom neckalce every day (izzy's ruby necklace) that turns the#back of your neck green and gets really worn and ugly looking because it's cheap metal and you literally don't take it off.#anyway. only THEN do you understand the lifestyle.#what the fuck was this post originally about. oh yeah cassie is soooo funny <3
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im glad that despite being on the backburner for . years. i can still think of my main aus like i never stopped :] kh on the brain forever
#looked thru one of my note for the pmd au and immediately got new ideas for it . i am so fucking back#made me wanna expand whats going on w Terra n Aqua since they dont have much going on besides. well. be legendaries basically#(they take the roles of rescue team Groudon n Kyogre as well as Latios n Latias in psmd. n technically also Entei for Terra in psmd)#that seems like a lot but i know what im doing i swear 👍#maybe i should find a way to include the khdr kids since i havent gotten to that yet.. could be fun#oh ! also been working on ways to connect Terra w Ansem n Xemnas :] probably gonna be more canon-esque than most other things#but it kinda works w the rescue team part of the timeline#and i really need to figure out how exactly to work around Xehanort bc of what he can and does do both in canon and taking his role here..#ironically these things are also backed up by pmd iq groups . now that i think abt it#i also need yo do more work on the psmd part of the timeline since its arguably the most altered part so far#since i dont really cover gates or rescue team anyway . explorers and super just connect a lil too well#i mean tbf gates and super are way too easy to also connect to each other bc like. come on.#but who would be the duo for that .. or maybe it could be earlier in the pmd timeline than it is .. hm.#that Could line up a something else i have planned actually. could be funky. theres two (2) different duos i have in mind#maybe more depending on who else i could slap in here#ok yeah. i have objectively the funniest duo to put in gates. thats happening now <3
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Ooohhh 3 5 10 (for as many titles as you want !!)
>:3!!!!!!!!
3) any recurring images/elements?
aaaaaaa ok here's a first-come-to-mind selection!
self righteous suicides (cait, faye, sol all holding hands as they walk for straight into nonexistence for various reasons)
a hand outstretched !! 🐇🔪 (oh what such a little hand can wreak..) -> palace times (taken, cradled, nurtured into control) -> empty/heavy still with arianna's weight felt in it, reaching for her daughter as she cries and breaks -> at the end of it all, leah reaching for belle as they fall to their supposed death in dream game) a small kindness paid forward thru generations ;-;
'turn away again' an extremely old thruline for reina (turning her back on her world as it burned) + faye (turning from belle's burned out angel form) which keeps popping up in adjacent sectors (the way jumie refuses all of reina's early displays of humanity / belle turning from every pretense of family (sky's outstreched hand, averted >:)) to seek faye instead)
there's a lot a lot more!! my sketchbooks are just an endless compilation of chars in mirror poses + so many trinkets passed down, changed in meaning, legacies taken up or subverted, i am OBSESSED <3
5) pick a theme song for the tv adaptation
ok im usually more of a character/arc specific song guy so i rarely have theme song type calls but ive been VERY MUCH THINKING ABT <this is a trick> again for mute city heaven it would make a GREAT intro!!!!!
10) if your story is titled, why did you choose that title?
do not tempt me to do this for individual stories because I WILL and it's gonna be the longest post of my life. rather choosing to go with some fun verse lore here!!
i might have mentioned before that a/s was my original verse that i then rebooted into what is now soulless verse. which originally was named shadow verse due to mainbook being abt the shadow scourge nd all but a) i started feeling extremely eh abt it bc of the shadowverse game that became a thing and b) soulless becoming a fleshed out concept + taking over the larger narrative arc without my consent so it was a very easy switch in the end!
the thing with a/s is that it's technically the dumbest placeholder name of all time coined back when my english was still very bad bc after shelving the original incarnation of the story i started referring to it as "amazonas stage" in my head (due to original being inspired by a book series set there and large forests do continue being a thruline to this day!!) but as my english got better nd i started posting abt story stuff online i got a little self conscious and began abbreviating it a/s and now it's just kinda? what it is??? one day i'll figure out what it actually stands for ww
#a/s is lowkey 'academy saga' since their bullshittery is the Core and Thruline but im not strongly committed to that we stay vague <3#askbox#cospinol#oc asks#the actual funniest lore is that in the original story i wrote i was like 'people have powers but not in a magical girl way!!!!!!!!'#bc i tried so hard to be original and cool and now im just like. yeah it's sailor moon all the way down B)c
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LET ME IN LET ME IN LET ME IN
#makes a grrrr noise at kakaopage#there's no way to circumvent the verification system ive looked#dont have a korean phone number bc i don't have a korean id so i must suffer instead TwT#can't read the LN and can't read the latest 3 chapters!!!#even tho id happily pay for them!!!!!#all i can tell from the comments is the Empress goes full on antag mode and Odelia finally comes back into the picture#also Lyla gets exiled and/or Fian jokes to her they should quite literally run away and elope?#and there's something about the Emperor showing up and being put in his place? while looking for a dragon??? i-???#and i can't tell if that's referring to Paris or the actual Emperor who has yet to show in the plot LMAO#not sure when Helene's coming back into the picture but im Very Curious about real life Lyla showing up again#it's probably just showing her reaction to Fian dying in the OG novel?#but also why the fuck is Daniel here again#god this manga makes me run circles there's so much going on and i NEED to know what's happening#i also sense a season finale is probably on the horizon and im not ready for that TwT#i love how the plot pt of Helene destroying the world continues to be evaded tho#the funniest thing in this manga is the story going “oh yeah btw Helene lost control of her powers and ended the world in the OG story" and#immediately never bringing up that plot point ever again#like???#excuse me????#no i get it that plot point doesn't have time to be addressed yet but man as a fan of Helene i am WAITING for her to lose control#because the only person who can probably stop her from doing that is Lyla and luckily she's “alive” in this timeline~
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tumblr is my only social but occasionally i do indulge in visiting other sites and looking up people i didn't like in high school to rejoice in how awful their lives are now
#one of my school bullies had 3 kids and another on the way when we were 20 lol. few years later and now she has 5 kids. different dads too#idc how toxic it is to say this but i love to see a good failure story#like yeah it turns out everyone saying “they bully you because they're unhappy. your life will end up better than theirs” was right!#my life IS better than 100% of the people i hated by the end of high school whether they bullied me or i simply didn't like them#mfw i have a steady white collar job with a pension waiting for me + the best health insurance + i put >25% of each paycheck into savings#it's not like i'm living a high life but none of those people will ever see a retirement working fast food in our hometown til they die 😳#the funniest ones are who i ended up graduating college with. like babygirl we both had the same opportunities... you CHOSE fast food? okkk#my awesome job isn't even specific to my degree. literally anyone with a bachelors can do it. liiiiiike#keep complaining to facebook about working at Popeyes with your bachelors girl imma bump up my TSP from 10% to 20% real quick#TBH there is not a single person from elementary/middle/high school that i would voluntarily “reconnect” with#the older i get the more i realize i didn't like a single mf from school even if i thought i did at the time. except for my number 1 bestie#i remember at about 16 i slowly cut off all my other friends for various reasons. literally could not have improved my school life more#i didn't make a single friend in college whatsoever and by god was i so happy. i would go to college forever if it were free#professional loner student#damn no wonder i got a personality disorder slapped onto my record 🤨 like ok girlfreak calm down with the edge (@ myself)#anyways thank you social media for letting me see this on the days i wake up feeling petty!!!!!!!!!#bluh
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In the latest installment of me Terrorizing Medical Professionals, I got my Wisdom Teeth extracted because one decided to be an asshole and the other 3 were pending assholery, and demonstrated to my dentist that it's entirely possible to out-metabolize Ketamine if you start moving ASAP and also have a freakishly powerful liver.
So yesterday I had my one-month Checkup. It went pretty great, and the dentist asked if any part of my mouth was bothering me.
"Yeah, there's a sharp bit of bone coming out through the side from the extraction in my lower right jaw. The bone spur itself doesn't hurt, but it keeps cutting my tongue, so can you just pull it?" "Oh. Sure! Let me go get everything to do that." she said, and went to go get the tools for the extraction.
...Then there was some kind of confusion at the front desk I could overhear, with someone showing up with an urgent problem and they had to juggle the available staff, so she came back a bit later with the Pliers, said something about something taking "long enough" and went in.
It came out in two pieces, and the most discomfort I had was like, a 3/10 from the extraction itself, but mostly from keeping my mouth open.
...About halfway through, the Hygienist came in, apologizing for being late getting back from the front desk.
"Oh good, you have her the Novocaine!" the hygienist sighs with relief.
"What?" Said my dentist.
"What?" said the hygienist.
Both of them turn to look at the very full syringe on the tool table behind me.
"Honestly this is bothering me way less than the shot would." I said, lightly dribbling blood, and they both turn to me in horror.
"I really hate needles." I explain.
"What." says the dentist.
"Woah." Says the hygienist. "You would have done great in like, The Civil War."
Which is probably the funniest thing anyone's every said about my dangerously high pain tolerance.
Anyway, it was a one-off issue, and a non-issue for me because I think a normal person would have stopped her, so I go back in August if she doesn't recommend me to someone else for terrifying her twice in as many visits.
#family lore#Dentistry#CW: teeth problems#I am fine I just tolerate pain extremely well if I know it isn't going to kill me
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Why Duke Thomas Should Be A Dick Grayson Hater
Dick and Duke is such an underrated and underexplored relationship. Here is my pitch for why Duke should be a Dick Grayson hater.
1. The Rooftop Thing
Reason number one and the start of Duke's grudge should be the rooftop incident in Robin War. Dick, as part of his plan or whatever, leads Duke to a roof and abandons him to the cops.
LOOK AT DICK'S SMUG FACE. Tell me you wouldn't hold a grudge too if this was the FIRST major interaction you had with him?? Duke should use this against him at any possible opportunity.
2. ACAB
From We Are Robin #2. Once Duke finds out Dick used to be a cop, it's OVER for him.
3. Jason and Damian
Duke is quite close with Jason and Damian (in my head, particularly Damian - that's his LITTLE BROTHER). Anyway, these two are obsessed with Dick. You have Jason, with his miles-long brother issues that puts Dick on a pedestal, and you have Damian, who thinks Dick is the best person on Earth who can do no wrong. They would talk Duke's ears off about him. Duke would HATE IT.
4. Robin
This panel from Night of the Monster Men sums up quite nicely the difference in the way Dick and Duke approach vigilantism. Duke is the 'idealised' Robin, whose Robin-ing isn't contingent on Batman; Dick is more or less too tied up in Bruce. I think, because the Robin identity means a lot to Duke, having the original Robin be like this would irk Duke a LOT.
5. Tom Taylor
SPOILERS FOR CURRENT NIGHTWING RUN: in Nightwing #116, Dick gets framed for murder and Babs tells him to reveal he's Nightwing to clear him of suspicion. She says Bruce suggested it, and recounts everyone who agreed:
Hm. Is someone missing here? Oh yeah: DUKE. TT probably just forgot Duke, but where's the fun in that? Instead, if Duke is a Dick Grayson hater, you have the funniest scene imaginable. Everyone gathered in the Batcave, laying down their identities for Dick, and Duke is like 'I don't give a damn. He can rot in jail.' and peaces out.
BONUS points if he does this to get back at Dick for reason number 1.
6. Parallels
Duke's origin deliberately mirrors Bruce's, but that means it mirrors Dick's as well. Duke and Dick parallels go insane: they both had loving families, lost both parents at once, were in the foster system (varyingly for Dick but for the purposes of this post I'm gonna include it), were wards/not adopted by Bruce initially, have a huge reverence for family, have a thing about heights, view Robin as separate from Batman, forged their own identities, etc.
Tell me this page doesn't slap:
Anyway Duke would HATE this too. He'd be so annoyed that the person he has the most in common with is Dick, and that would fuel his Dick Grayson haterism.
Dick, on the other hand, has no hard feelings towards Duke. Duke would be glowering at him from the corner of the room and Dick would meet his gaze and be like 'ah Duke is so cute' and smile back. This would make Duke 10000x angrier.
Anyway that's my ideal Dick and Duke dynamic, feel free to add or modify or disagree with anything!!
#dick grayson#duke thomas#batman#let duke thomas be a hater 2024#dick 100% knows that duke low-key hates him and he finds it funny#damian and tim worshipping him and jason having complicated feelings about dick that borders on obsession and cass being jealous#and duke is just. i hate this man#don't get me wrong duke and dick brotherisms >>>>>#it's just more fun where there's a little conflict#i may have made this because i got so upset about those batfamily relationship polls#PUT SOME RESPECT ON DUKE RELATIONSHIPS
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queen shit | max verstappen
pairing: max verstappen x pageant queen! reader
summary: max verstappen mets you, his long term celebrity crush at a charity event.
notes; someone request this but i accidentally posted it before i finished and had to delete it…i hope this finds you anon
liked by rupaulofficial, maxverstappen, mclaren, and 913,047 others!
yoursername: very successful event tonight, many thank you's to all those who attended and donated, much love 💜
view comments below!
user1: by very successful she means that she just raised over 20 million dollars for family's in need. 20 million dollars. TWENTY MILLION DOLLARS.
user2: QUEEN. SHIT.
user3: i love rich people actually putting their money and status to work
user4: my goat 💪💪
user5: there were SO MANY different celebrities there
user6: and she definitely did NOT know all of them!
user7: probably just invited them so more money could be donated 😭
user8: was the most random people too, like kim kardiashian?? mitski??? f1 drivers??? hockey players??
user9: no seriously. because why was i watching the livestream only to see george russell dancing in the background. very horribly may i add
georegrussel|63: thank you for the invite! i had the time of my life!
yoursername: of course george! thank you for the donating :) <3
user10: they’re friends???
user11: some of yall are FAKE FANS. yn and george have been friends for YEARS. he even posted her when she won miss universe and many times after
user12: i wasn't even alive when she won miss universe...
user13: PAUSE.
user14: WHAT ARE YOU ON SOCIAL MEDIA? THIS IS NOT A SAFE PLACE FOR YOU
user15: YOURE SIX?? AND CAN SPELL??
user16: are we all going to pretend like max didn't just meet his celebrity crush?
user17: most people here don't know who he is 😭
user18: "meet" is a STRETCH, he stood behind her all night just staring...
user19: yeah it was actually kinda sad
user20: f1twt is CLOWNING HIM SO HARD RN
user23: 3x world champion and he's too scared to go up to his celebrity crush
user24: OKAY GUYYYSSS BUTTT this is his first time seeing her in person! ofc he was shocked, maybe next time he'll actually go up to her?
landonorris: thanks for the invite!
georgerussell63: you were my plus one?
landonorris: SHHHH
georgerussell63: in fact, everyone on the grid got personally invited, except you?
landonorris: STOP AIRING OUT MY BUSINESS
user27: yn definitely didn't invite him directly just so lando could be embarrassed like this
alex_albon: best thai food ever (other then my moms) thank you for the invite!
user25: yeah we saw they way your scarfed that shit down
user26: acting like it was the last fucking supper
yourusername: thank you for coming alex! (and for taking home the leftovers)
user28: HE TOOK HOME THE LEFT OVERS?
maxverstappen1: hi
georgerussell63: oh no
landonorris: no way he does it
charles_leclerc: i believe in you max
carlossainz55: don't hype him up! max don't do it. don't embarrass yourself like this
oscarpiastri: i say go for it max
yourusername: hi max :)
georgerussell63: omg omg OMG
maxverstappen1: would you like to go on a date with me?
landonorris: oh he did it...
carlossainz55: NOOO
charles_leclerc: yay max!
user29: it's been 10 hours and still no response...
liked by georgerussell63, and 762,091 others!
yourusername: pretty sunset 🌅
view comments below!
user30: is that…a man?
user31: this makes max being rejected so much more humiliating
user32: SHE HAS A WHOLE BOYFRIEND?? 😓
user33: max found sobbing into his pillow
user34: *not clickbait*
georgerussell63: i laughed
user35: GEORGE???
user36: he’s funny for this
user37: max most definitely doesn’t think it’s funny
user38: yns first time soft launching and it’s right after max publicly asks her out…hm!
user39: she was waiting for the funniest moment to do this
user40: QUEEN SHIT
user41: ok but who is this man 🤨
user42: don’t call me delusional…but that hand kinda looks like max
user43: okay granny let’s get you back to the nursing home…
user44: thankful i’m not this delusional
user45: free yn from the max fans…
user46: @/user42 DONT LET THEM SILENCE YOU
landonorris: he cried
yourusername: i cried
landonorris; we crode
user47: okay it’s definitely max
user48: lando knows something
user49: MAX ISNT IN THE LIKES??
user50: it really isn’t him…hes been flirting with her through the likes for years
user51: rip max being the first to like yns post..gone but never forgotten 🕊️
charles_leclerc: hehehe…hehehe…hehe
user52: WHAT DO TOU KNOW CHARLES
user53: don’t fuck with me charles. i am not in the mood.
user54: you can’t convince me that man is not max when all his friends are in the comments section like this
user55: charles istg
alex_albon: i know something 😏
user56: ok. it’s definitely max.
user57: i still don’t think it is…we can’t see his face
user58: but what are the chances she soft launches after max asks her out
user59: she probably did it to be funny?
user60: and it worked! she’s too funny
liked by alex_albon, carlossainz, and 914,058 others!
maxverstappen1: matching sunglasses 🕶️
view comments below!
user61: QUICK, WHOS FEET DO THOSE LOOK LIKE
user62: oh max…
user63: okay so! it’s either max and yn DID go on that date, or yn has a bf and max posted this to save himself
user64: i realllyyy hope max and yn did go on that date because if max posted this just to save himself the embarrassment….
user65: what if this isn’t even a girl, and it’s one of max’s friend pretending to be a girl 😭
user66: i can see charles pretending to be the girl
user67: HE SO WOULD
charles_leclerc: those are NOT my toes 🤕
user68: okay but no one on the grid has skinny little girl hands like this
user68: logan does
logansargent: ?
user68: well this is awkward
georgerussell63: well well well
user69: THIS CAN MEAN MANY THINGS GEORGE!! IS THIS YN OR NOT
user70: i don’t think it’s yn. she’s too pretty for max.
comment liked by georgerussell63
user70: GEORGE LIKED??
user71: so it’s NOT yn?
user72: but he could mean it in a “they are dating but she’s too pretty for him” way
user73: GRRRR
carlossainz55: i can’t believe it
user74: WHAT. WHAT CANT YOU BELIVE CARLOS
user75: you can’t believe that yn and max actually went out?? or you can’t believe max got a another girl after being publicly rejected??
user76: they’re like giving us hints but at the same time they’re not??
user77: THEYRE PLAYING WITH US
liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, and 802,520 others!
maxverstappen1: i’m dating a pageant queen and you’re not! 
view comments below!
user78: FINALLY!
user79: could’ve just said this earlier..
user80: could’ve saved us the trouble 😒
carlossainz55: i still can’t believe it
user81: SO HE DID MEAN IT IN A “can’t believe you actually got her” WAY
maxverstappen1: you have no faith in me :(
carlossainz55: correct!
charles_leclerc: i believed in you max!
maxverstappen1: thank you charles 😄
carlossainz55: he’s lying, he bet €50 you wouldn’t get a text back
maxverstappen1: THAT BASTARD
charles_leclerc: IT DIDNT SEEM LIKE YOU WERE GOING TO GET A REPLY! I THOUGHT IT WAS A GOOD TIME TO WIN €50 AND I WOULD’VE GIVEN YOU HALF?
user83: i could be dating a pageant queen, you don’t know me
user84: are you?
user83: am i what?
user84: dating a pageant queen?
user83: no
user84: what is wrong with you
user85: i love how nobody was hating, we all just wanted to know if max x yn was happening
user86: max has gotten his dream girl…WE CHEERED
user87: years later and lot of instagram likes, we DID IT 👏
user88: we?
user89: i was there almost 8 years ago when max put his first like on yns post, so yes! WE
user90: thank god for that charity event
liked by maxverstappen1
yourusername: former pageant queen
maxverstappen1: you’ll always be a pageant queen in my eyes 🥰
landonorris; simp
maxverstappen1: mad you don’t have a girlfriend?
user91: WOAH GIRLFRIEND?
user92: girl what did you think was going on here
user91: I DIDDNT KNOW THEY MADE IT OFFICIAL
liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo, and 715,047 others!
yourusername: i’m dating a 3x wdc and you’re not!
view comments below!
user92: please don’t rub it in
user93: i’m soooo happy for you guys (sarcasm)
user93: yes i’m jealous
danielricciardo: actually i am dating a 3x wdc and his name is max verstappen
yourusername; really? because max verstappen is is laying on me right now
danielricciardo: that’s a clone. the REAL max verstappen is laying to my right.
yourusername: this is what we call schizophrenia 🥰
user94: you guys are so cute! (i’m jealous, i’m so fucking jealous)
user95: max started dating his celebrity crush of 8 years in 8 days! we did it joe! we did it
user96: they won’t last. they’re moving to fast.
user97: they’re both grown adults who know what they want 🤷♀️
maxverstappen1: that’s me!
yourusername; that’s you!
georgerussell63: yeah max we have EYES.
maxverstappen1: don’t be pissy because yn likes me more now
georgerussell63: she does NOT
maxverstappen1: you keep thinking that 😇
charles_leclerc: i always knew he could do it!
maxverstappen1: no you didn’t. stop lying to me.
charles_leclerc: IM SORRY. I WAS GOING TO SHARE THE €50 WITH YOUUU.
maxverstappen1: I DONT CARE @/oscarpiastri is the ONLY know who truly believed in me
oscarpiastri: i bet €100 against you
maxverstappen1: I CANT TRUST ANYONE
alex_albon: does this mean we’ll be invited to more charity events?
user98: you’re just thinking of the food 😐
alex_albon: …yeah
maxverstappen1: 😁🥰👊😏🔥💕🤗
user99: bro starts dating his celebrity crush and forgets how to act
user100: me if i was dating oscar
. . .
notes: thank you for the request! (even though i accidentally deleted it)
#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen social media au#max verstappen smau#max verstappen x y/n#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen x you#max verstappen fic#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#f1 x female reader#f1 social media au#f1#f1 fluff#formula one smau#formula one x you#formula one x reader
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