#in response to me saying I'm not ok with my brother being dead

[vvitchy-succubus]

.

[noblehouseofgay]

Nowhere to go

Jegulus and Black Brothers microfic

Reg survives the cave

Longer than usual, I got carried away

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

He was bleeding out, he was sure of it. His blurry vision alone told him that he only had so long left.

He almost couldn't decide if he'd rather come here or just bleed out. But he did have some self preservation left, so here he stood at the Potter's door.

As far as they knew, he was an evil death eater. He knew there was a chance he'd be turned away or even killed on the spot. After years of turning down their invitations, what right did he even have to be here?

Unfortunately he couldn't change his mind. He all but collapsed against the door. This was it wasn't it? The Potters would find a corpse on their doorstep and not even know why. Well, at least he'd get to traumatize his brother one last time.

He felt the door open against his leg and he heard someone yell. He had no idea who it was or what was being said. He was blacking out fast. Ha, blacking out. Black. Oh I'm dying. His deluded thoughts ceased as he left consciousness.

~~~

Regulus shot up, breathing quickly. Where the hell was he? He remembered the cave. He remembered ordering kreacher to leave. He remembered.....oh merlin, he remembered being dragged down. Pulled beneath the water. He remembered being apparated. He didn't know how but he'd ended up on a street corner. And he remembered choosing to find the Potters. Oh fuck. He was at the Potters.

He looked around, quickly finding his brother asleep on the chair nearby. Sirius. Without thinking, Regulus began to reach out to him. He gently touched his brother's hand. He was real. He was here.

Sirius stirred and Regulus pulled his hand away. They made eye contact for the first time in years. "Reggie..." Regulus bit his lip. What was he supposed to say right now? How do you even explain this situation?

Apparently it didn't matter, because Sirius moved quickly to hug Regulus. Soon enough they were sobbing into each other. The embrace felt like home, something Regulus hadn't felt since he was 13.

"What happened to you? Did our parents do that-" Sirius pulled back, looking horrified. "I swear, Reggie you- you looked dead!"

"I know how to kill him." Sirius froze. "I know how to kill the dark lord. I already have one piece, I- I don't know how many there are- but he can be killed, Sirius."

Sirius looked beyond lost. "Reggie, slow down." He sighed. "I'm going to grab James and his parents, then you're going to tell us everything."

So he did. Regulus filled them in on what he could, all while avoiding James' eyes as much as possible. Even now, those eyes held so much power over Regulus.

After he'd told the story, Effie and Monty left to discuss, leaving the three boys alone.

The silence was thick. "I'm glad you're ok." Of course James would say that, he had a heart too big for his body. Regulus nodded in response, his feelings too overwhelming to speak.

"You're staying here, by the way, I hope that's obvious. I'm not letting you get away from me again, Reggie. You're not going back to that house." Regulus sighed and looked at his brother. He assumed that would be the case. "Fine, but I'll need to get kreacher to bring me things from there. I've done a lot of research on the horcruxes, it's all in my journals. Plus I had him take the locket since-..." He almost didn't want to say it again. "Since I didn't think I'd make it out. The plan was he'd take the locket and my studies to you. But I think he brought me here as well, I'm not sure."

"Well at least that bloody elf has done one good thing." "Watch it. He's helped me a lot, Sirius. He's loyal to be more so than the house of Black." Sirius rolled his eyes. "Fine. But I still don't like him." He stood up. "I'll go get your guest room set up, it's next to mine."

Well now this was just awkward. He was left with James, you know, the boy he'd spent years in love with. The boy he'd danced around and teased for years. The boy he never got the chance to be with. The boy he never thought would even look at him.

The Marauders' final year had changed a lot though. Regulus and James became closer than ever. That is, until Regulus had to distance himself for everyone's sake. They'd never even kissed. Never did more than give each other looks in the halls, really.

Regulus spoke quietly, not looking at the boy. "I had nowhere else to go, I-" he took a breath, "I really wouldn't have put all this on you if I'd had a choice." James carefully moved to sit next to Regulus, his hand lightly resting on his. "I'm glad you did, Reg. We didn't- we had no idea if you were even still alive. Neither of us had ever seen you on the battlefield, there were no reports of you." James fingers held Regulus hand gently. "This was your plan from the start?" Regulus nodded. "I understand why you didn't tell us...but I wish you could've. I wish we could've helped you."

Regulus swallowed, staring into those warm hazel eyes. "I didn't want to risk your lives. I did it to keep you as safe as I could. If you hated me...then you wouldn't try to save me." Regulus laughed a little sadly. "Yet here we are now, it ended up being your problem in the end anyway." "Hey, don't do that. We want to help, Reg. You've done so much. We can end the war now! Because of you..." James brushed some black strands of hair out of Regulus' face. "You're so brave, you know that?" The taller boy stood up and left a kiss on Regulus' head, leaving the smaller boy blushing like crazy. He smiled at Regulus and nodded for him to follow. "I'll take you to your room, you should rest."

Regulus stood and followed, in somewhat of a daze from that interaction. They went upstairs and found Sirius setting up the room, adding a few little details. Sirius smiled at his brother, something Regulus never thought he'd do again.

The two other boys nodded to Regulus and headed out, Sirius giving him a gentle squeeze on the shoulder. "I'm right next door, Reggie. James is across from me, and the bathroom is at the end of the hall." James peaked back in from the hall. "And my parents are just down from me if you need them. Or us. Whatever you need, alright?" Regulus nodded with a small smile. "Get some rest, Reggie."

Regulus immediately laid down, feeling himself already being pulled into sleep. He was exhausted. Today had been forty hours long, he swore it. He'd almost died and reunited with his brother and James all in a few hours. There was a lot to deal with starting tomorrow, but for now he'd rest well, knowing his had those two back in his life.

[nanaloveswo-men]

FEEL LIKE I AM HUMAN

CHAPTER - 1

wc: 2.2k

prologue

Pitch black engulfed the house, everyone already fast asleep, except the two siblings. The night outside was quiet, the only sounds that could be heard coming from the room in the middle of the hallway. 

"Madara, I'm going to tell you this again, I'm not sure if our supplies will last much longer than a week, we need to back off now." For a moment, the moonlight illuminated Madara's expression, and you were sure that you got a glimpse of tiredness, or even sadness passing in his eyes. 

You would never be sure though, after all, the room was still covered by the dark of the night. 

"As I said before, this is none of your business, so do not worry. We will back off when I told so." You sighed loud at his response, tired of this discussion, but most mad that he couldn't just hear you. "Let's end the night here, ok?" 

Madara never asked anything, he didn't need to. He was the head of the Uchiha clan, if he wanted anything, he would order, and he would be obeyed. Still, he had a sweet spot for his siblings, so for you, his only little sister, he would ask. Even beg, if it was necessary. You could just trust your big brother because he was going to fix everything up. 

"Madara, I sew, each one of our soldiers every day, I see them dying, suffering, crying, for so many years that I can't even count now." You approached him, your voice weak and low, almost whispering. "Of course this is my business, as you say, they are my clan, my family!" 

In the silence of the night, Madara could hear the break in your voice, actually, he swore that he was hearing your heart beat. Loud and rhythmic, his own heart answering, loud and rhythmic. 

You couldn't bear this anymore. You weren't a fighter, since a child, you were raised to be a princess, the pretty little sister of the clan.  Still, you had chosen the medical camp, happy to be of any support. Happy to help your people, happy to help your brothers.  

At this point, this war was meaningless to you, why put so many lives on the line of death when you were gaining nothing in return? For some kind of pride? Past unresolved fights?  

"Madara, no one is going to be mad at you if you accept Hashiramas's offer, trust me, everybody wants to end this. Please, think. Think about our future, not about the things that happened in the past. Please, I'm begging you." You whispered, but he stood in silence. You turned away from him, you didn't want him to see the tears almost spilling from your eyes. 

Madara tensed. In fact, he did want to accept Hashirama's offer. Just like everybody else, he didn't want to keep this war, but would he be weak if he did so? What about the sacrifices the Uchiha clan made along the war, what about the people that trusted him? Honestly, he wasn't sure about what he should do.  

This situation was sad, you and Madara weren't the ones to fight, but now, you couldn't come to an agreement. "I'm sorry" he finally said.  

You left the room without giving him a second look, but instinctively, you knew that he would be still in the same position, standing in the middle of the room, the weight of being the Uchiha leader trying to bring him down. 

… 

'Need to clean this mess.’ You thought looking around the nursery. Everything was out of place, and the trash can was looking kind of nasty, full of blooded tissues, used needles and other things that you didn't want to look at. "It's filthy" you whispered to yourself, trying to fill the silence on your mind.  

The nursery was full, looking at the floor, you could see a bunch of men laying on the futons while a couple of medical ninjas were checking on them. Still, the place was quiet, 'almost dead', you thought.  

From time to time, you could hear some of the man moaning from pain, other times, you could see the medical ninjas whispering to each other. 

Thinking better, probably the nursery was full of noises, just on your mind that was totally in silence, impeding your ears to hear the fuss of the afternoon.  

The sound of glass breaking took you out of your mind, quickly, your body turned to the entrance of the tent. Madara entered the nursery, almost knocking someone over and breaking some medicines on the way. 

"What is happening?" you shouted, adrenaline already running through your veins.  

Then you noticed. Izuna passed out by Madara's side, blood running down his legs. Both brothers' faces were pale, but at least Madara was still with his eyes opened. 

For a moment, you thought that Izuna was gone, he had lost much bloody, his body was cold, and he was white as a ghost. But you were a medical ninja, and you would never give up on your brother's life. Never. 

Madara was sitting outside the tent, his head was up, eyes looking straight into the horizon, but he wasn't seeing anything, hearing nothing, for a moment, he even stopped breathing.  

Izuna was dying. Izuna was dying.  Izuna was dying. Izuna was dying.  Izuna was dying. Izuna was dying.  Izuna was dying. Izuna was dying.  Izuna was dying. Izuna was dying. 

Suddenly, a hand touched his shoulder, taking the leader out of his trance. 

"He is going to be fine. Izuna will live." You said, tears rolling down your face. 

… 

"I need to tell something." Madara said one morning during breakfast.  

Izuna and you looked at each other, silently asking if the other knew anything about what the older Uchiha was talking about.  

"I discussed with the elders, and we decided that it is better for the clan that I accept Hashirama offer of peace. It's time to finally end this war."  you gasped, almost choking on your food. You looked over at Izuna, and he had the same reaction as yours. Obviously, he didn't know anything about this sudden change either.  

Over the last few weeks, Izuna and you were out of political business, Izuna because he was still recovering from his injury, and you, well, because you were a woman, and the elders didn't like to share any information with you. Still, good news were good news. 

"You can't say this from nowhere!" you said, smiling almost reaching your ears. Your heart was beating fast, just like that night, but now not because you were mad, but because you were excited, happy, proud.  

"I can't believe you took this decision without me! I'm the second on command, you should have waited for me!" Izuna shouted, pretending that he was angry, but both you and Madara could see through his behavior.  

Madara laughed at your faces, quickly returning his attention to his plate.  "Just eat your food and be happy about it". Even though he hadn't said anything directly to anyone, you knew that almost losing Izuna had made Madara think better about this war. He couldn't lose the future of this family because of the past. 

'I'm proud of you' Madara could read on your eyes. 

... 

"Elder brother, I don't think we should trust the Uchihas that easily. Their clan is marked by hatred, pain and blood. You should think better about your decision."  

As always, Tobirama was trying to put some sense inside his brother's head, but just like every other time, Hashirama wouldn't listen to anything at all.  

Just like everyone else, Tobirama wanted to free the Senju clan from the war, but still, he wasn't sure if they could trust the Uchiha, not because he had something against their people, but because he didn't trust the power they held. 

Hashirama smiled, patience as always. "I'm happy that you are worried, but we don't need to fight anymore, you'll realize that when our alliance starts to grow. " Tobirama frowned at this, not happy to be turned down by his brother. "For now, you just need to trust me." 

Just like in any other time, the young Senju would trust Hashirama, hoping that things wouldn't get out of control (of course, Tobirama would never let that happen). Now, he was going to do everything he could to construct the village his brother always wanted to create, even if he was with the Uchiha clan.  

"This isn't going to end well, elder brother" he warned one last time. 

… 

Reunions, reunions, and more reunions. The following weeks were full of political meetings. You weren't part of them, but your brothers would they you the gossip of the day by the night, when the three of you were having dinner. 

Usually, Madara complained to about how Hashirama was an idiot, and he was surprised that the Senju clan was still alive with him at the lead. Still, you could see in his eyes and in the smile, he tried so bad to cover that Madara actually liked the other man. 

But above all the topics Madara liked to complain about, definitely his favorite was about Tobirama. Apparently, 'he is a pain in my ass, he always has something stupid to say, and other things to cry about to Hashirama', the Uchiha leader said one time.  

It was dark by now, and you should probably be sleep by now, but you couldn't help but continue sitting at the table while hearing Madara complain about the last meeting he had with the Senju brothers.  

"I guess he really doesn't like this Tobirama." You whispered to Izuna.  

"You know, I think he's still being nice considering the circumstances." He said back. 

But you didn't understand. You looked confused at Izuna. Madara had the right to hate all the Senju's, but why the specific hate towards Tobirama? 

"He was the one who stabbed me." He explained after looking at your confused face. 

All the color run out of your face. Okay, you didn't know that. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to talk about this." You whispered, feeling guilty pool at your stomach. 

Even though things were good now, since Izuna was injured, anyone had discussed the incident, just pretending that nothing had happened. But you knew that happened. Sometimes, when you were alone, you could still feel Izuna's blood on your hands, the iron smell confusing your senses. 

Izuna took your hands in his, and only now you noticed that you were shaking a bit. "It's okay, I'm good now." He smiled. "My ego is hurt now that you thought that I was so weak that I would die by the hands of a Senju." He said with a smirk on his face. 

"Sorry, you were so pale that I thought that you were dead and a ghost already." You teased. 

"Nah, I wasn't that bad." 

"Yes, you were." 

"Stop!" 

You laughed at him, and Izuna showed his tongue back to you. 

"What are you two doing?" Madara asked, amused by your childish behavior. 

"Nothing!" You answered in unison. 

... 

"It's huge!" Your cheeks were already hurting from the big smile stretching on your face. "I can't believe we're going to live here" Madara was also smiling, happy that you liked the place Hashirama and himself were so proud of. 

You looked around, seeing from the top of the mountain, the wooden houses that, from little to little, were forming the new village. On the left side was the Uchiha district, and on the right side was the Senju part. "Did you and Hashirama already think of a name for the village?" you asked, returning your attention to your brother. 

Madara paused for a moment, looking straight at a big tree. "Hidden Leaf Village." A strong wind passed by the two of you, swinging Madara's hair, letting you see the light in his dark eyes. 

"I love it, it's pretty." You smiled. 

… 

Tobirama sighed for what felt like the tenth time. Almost ten minutes had passed since Hashirama dragged him by the streets of the Leaf, and he still had no idea where they were going. 

"Don't worry" his brother said, and he wasn't worried, but for sure, he was stressed. Finally, they stopped in front of what would be, in the future, the hokage tower. 

Tobirama frowned. "What are we doing here, elder brother?" He could here hear talking coming from inside the building, and he didn't like what he was listening, it almost sounded like it was Madara's voice. 

"I want you to meet someone." And Hashirama entered the place, leaving Tobirama with no other option besides entering the building too. Just like he predicted, Madara was there, with Izuna. 

"Like I was saying to you, before, this is my younger brother, Tobirama" Hashirama presented him. 

"Nice to meet you" A woman appeared from behind Madara's back, offering him a nod and a shy smile. 

You looked at the man standing in front of you. He was tall, with a weirdo gray (or white? You couldn't decide) hair, a shit expression, and three cute little red marks adorning his face. 

So, this was the infamous Tobirama Senju. 

tag: @thenightperson

[emanonyourstruly]

Politics, Love, and Uneasiness

So elections happened and I am uncomfortable. Donald Trump is president and I, like many others, hate him. He is a sexist, racist, classist maniac. Politics is important to me. I know people say there is no right and wrong and everyone has a right to their opinion but I'm sorry, so many people are wrong. Twisted.

What is right is that people should be equal and there should be separation of religion and government which republicans have a hard time understanding. Gay people aren't hurting anyone. Immigrants aren't hurting anyone. Muslim people aren't hurting anyone. Black people aren't hurting anyone. Women should be able to choose whether or not they want to keep an already dead baby in them or not.

My girlfriend- who is not really my girlfriend but my ex but we still love each other bla bla don't judge me- didn't vote. To some degree, I feel responsible. I joked that what was I gonna do, force her? I already tried to stop her from being friends with a guy, who sold his ex's nudes without her permission, but she looked so lonely and pathetic and she went back to being friends with him anyway so I stopped trying to force my mindset on her. She told me I should have educated her and pushed her to vote. I told her that maybe I should have, but it was also not my responsibility. If she didn't vote that was her own choice. Maybe she didn't think that it was her problem. She is a rich Asian Christian girl anyway. She never had to work for anything in her life. I'm taking my disappointment and frustration out on her but can you blame me? I'm a poor brown Muslim girl.

And like I said, I am a poor brown Muslim girl. What will happen to me and my family in the future? I rely on a government grant to get through college and I was hoping my brother could go to college with the same grant. College is so insanely expensive it is UNFAIR. no one can defend the prices of colleges. Anyway,

Can someone tell me I'm not crazy for being upset with her when she keeps defending Trump and her dad for voting for Trump? How are you gay and not mad? That just wreaks of privilege. I bet her dad is happy as hell that he'll be getting a tax cut. I am so over this. governments are corrupt. What did I really expect?

I just have a big fear of the world ending and goddd pleaseeee someone tell me that we'll be ok. poor folk. people of color. tell me we will be ok.

This is my journal entry for now thanks for reading if anyone even is.

I'm out :3 with love!

[aliceisathome]

I am completely invested in My Stand In - specifically I am invested in Tong being completely and utterly humiliated, destroyed and left with nothing.

OK, of course I'm invested in Joe and Ming but every time I see Tong's smug face I want to punch it. Hard. Why yes, I'm literally only 3 minutes in, why do you ask?

Ooh hello Mike, long time no see. When are you and Secretary Jim going to be getting some action eh? It's ep 8 already - go get your man! Or am I imagining things and there is no second couple? Pfft.

Ming is so confused ('you're so like Joe. Joe's not dead! But are you Joe?') that he's finally agreed to meditate with Mysterious Shaman. In the meantime Wut and Sky take the less tree-based option and stake out OG Joe's parent's grave on what I'm presuming is a significant date, catching New Joe in the act. I loved Wut's anger - such a real response both to Joe's ignoring his advice which lead to his death and to him not trusting him enough to tell him he was back. He's a good man. And argh - Sol's so nice, I wish I could be on his side but I'm afraid, much like Joe, Ming's got me in his grip. I blame Up's acting and lovely little face.

Plus he spent at least 18 hrs sitting on a branch in search of the truth. That's some dedication right there.

And blimey - we get Mike twice in one episode. I do love the fact that the fact that Ming meditated is what's made him and Jim anxious. Not any of the other (frankly bonkers) behaviour he's been displaying.

Also MIKE'S MING'S BROTHER!!!! Did we know this? I just thought he was the shaman's disciple. Has he been mentioned before? If he was I was probably too focussed on Joe's torso to notice...

I kinda love that despite saying the feelings for Ming died with his old body, our boy Joe was so thoroughly ploughed into the mattress that his new body also sneezed on orgasm. And Ming's completely unsurprised - look at that face. He knows. Also, let us all mourn the complicated sheet origami that is denying us even a hint of hip, thigh or butt in this otherwise excellent scene.

It looks like Joe, Ming and I were all hoping Joe's original body was in a coma somewhere but it seems we are doomed to disappointment. This is going to be traumatic for everyone.

[roshellow29]

Idk why but I feel the need to rant about trolls band together so here's a warning for SPOILERS.

TL;DR I'll be talking shit about major conflict parts in the movie that I wished were handled differently >:((((

Please take caution (and a deep breath) reading this because I'm very bad at making sense when I ramble ok? Ok les go

OK SO.

The movie was great, loved the songs and I enjoyed branches family shenanigans, including supportive girlfriend poppy I've been WAITING FOR THIS (ifykyk)

But here are some things that bothered me that they could've definitely done differently

1. JOHN DORYS ENTIRE CHARACTER ARC- jd is great. He's actually my favorite! He's a cringefail boyfailiure and I love him for it. In the movie, his whole thing was that he was basically an ass who didn't listen to his siblings and always pressured and bossed them around. Cool, that's established. What's not is, Why??? It's really the whole "perfect family harmony" thing I guess.

Because later in the conflict he says that it was "hard being responsible for four younger siblings" (which bitch me too were litteraly the same) and that all they needed to be was perfect. what I don't understand is why? Why the whole perfect harmony? Where did it come from? They didn't say it was a big thing or that other bands did it? Would it get them more fame? Would it mean that they're perceived as the perfect brothers or something?? Also, why wasn't the grandmother more involved with the kids?? Did she pressure him to care for his siblings because their parents weren't involved or something? That's just one thing that's not really explained to me ig 🤔

And the whole thing that bothers me with jd is that he doesn't do the cliché "branch I'm sorry I was an asshole brother, and I wanna be a better troll to you and our bros. And blah blah blah" like they skip that entire potential jd apology??? I was expecting that with a hug?? I WANTED A HUG WITH BRANCH AND JD OK. He genuinely cares about him!!! You can see it, he really does. He's just bad at communicating. Like extremely - so they skipped that and just made him go, "We'll follow ur lead branch," and that's it.😐 no apology. No proper character development. Just him going "ok yeah I'll follow u one time." LIKE HUH. (This also includes the other siblings cuz they dipped on branch the same, and none of them said sorry!!)

OH and another thing. WHY WERE CLAY AND BRUCE SUCH ASSHOLES TO JD. ESPECIALLY CLAY. like I completely get it, he was an asshole, he pressured and bossed you around, we know that. But that was 20 PLUS YEARS AGO??? Like no you don't have to hug him but damn why r yall so cold???

I'm thinking that because I'm p sure they went no contact at all after they broke up. So how r they so sure he's still the way he was before?? (I mean they were kinda right but still) like you could've been super happy and then get disappointed later when trying to practice hitting the note. It would've made more sense to me idk. Like it just bothers me that they straight up ignore him- it's mean! (But I can't be too mad I mean they all have their reasons ig 🙄)

While we're on the topic of the family, on to my next point.

2. ROSIEPUFF AND HER DEATH. I think it was handled HORRIBLY. Like the whole movie I was just like "plz don't skip over it plz don't skip over it." And then branch drops the bomb on them right (which still caught me off guard like damn) and THEYRE DUMBFOUNDED, GREAT. And then after that there's NOTHING. NOTHING!?!??!?!?!? they don't mention it they don't apologize to branch for what he went through they don't take two seconds to mourn her they're just like "wait she dead?" And then fucking move on like. Why???? they don't question how, they don't question when branch was living in solidarity for 20 years, nothing. and I'm mad as fuck because that was part of Branches entire CHARACTER ARC in the first movie!! They don't mention he was gray they don't mention he didn't sing they don't mention anything. He went through that for 20 YEARS, ALONE. and they don't mention it. I rlly hated that- like they rlly didn't care.

Anyway.

Third smaller topic that I thought was gonna happen

3. I thought clay was gonna end up going, "actually yknow what, I AM fun" and then embrace himself because hes most definitely goofy. But nah they left him trying so hard to convince himself he's serious, and tbh he just came across as branch 2.0.

Alright moving on!!

4. I'm mad they didn't include a little flashback of viva and poppy being inseparable until the escape happened. Like I know popps was an infant but at the same time troll kids talk the day they're born, so it would've been nice to see them be together at least once before they separated.

Also.

I WANNA DECK PEPPY IN THE FACE. you lost your daughter and instead of MOURNING her and spreading her memory you decided to act like she didn't EXIST. WHY. like he was obviously depressed and sad but why didn't you tell poppy stories of her when she was a kid or something? And keep her memory alive??

(And sure. There's the thing with "They weren't gonna give poppy a sister until now" but I feel like they could've at least made poppy remember a small flashback is what I'm saying.)

Idk. I just wish it was handled differently like why is peppy keeping so much shit to himself lmao.

Oh yeah and then there's just my little nitpick and it's that I wish they included the troll leaders in the wedding sequence ok they're all friends they should've been invited ok I just wanted to see them again 😭(totally not saying thus cuz world tour is my fav but I am)

Anyway, yeah! I think this is just what mainly bothers me about the movie. I just feel like the conflict was handled poorly. But either than that it's still a good watch. I like it a lot :D

If you read this far, God damn you like to read, and thanks for dealing with my stupid thoughts!

If not, that's OK lol.

[asmutwriter]

You Saved Me (Part 20)

DESCRIPTION: (Season 15) You're last encounter with Dean was eventful. Very eventful. But you took it as a form of goodbye. So when the green eyed hunter shows up at your work you're more then surprised.

WORD COUNT: 2032

A/N: I have written the full story for my Dean x f!reader story! This is the second to last chapter so stick around as I plan on posting that very soon!

From Beginning / Previous / Next / Master List  

WARNINGS: drinking, eating, very brief mentions of a possible death (reader gets worried a character has died), brief kissing, honestly just a whole bunch of fluff, reader and Dean being silly and not doing anything about their obvious feelings for each other

DISCLAIMERS

- This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

A YEAR LATER

You'd be lying if you said you hadn't thought about Dean everyday for the past year. Worry and anxiety filled your very being every time you thought about him. Although you tried desperately to push those pesky thoughts away. You hadn't heard from him since he left. Not unusual. You always tried to keep in touch but you both had such busy and hectic lives you often found yourselves with very little time to keep in contact. So you would sometimes text him and just try your best not to overthink it when he never answered back.

You didn't want to ring Sam about it. You assumed that if Dean had passed away he would inform you. Or if he had forgotten to tell you then you didn't want to ring or text about his brother only to have the response being 'he is dead'. So you left it. More to help with your own anxieties. Not knowing the truth always made you live onto that small shred off hope that he was alive somewhere. With the blissful ignorance that comes with you never asking any further questions.

So you carry on with your life. Serving at the bar you now own and work at full time. Your eldest daughter having stopped going to school and started working at your bar. Although she was looking into a college near the area. She wants to be a singer so you had come to the agreement that if she works and/or goes to a form of education then you would allow her to sing at your work place a couple of nights a week. That plus she helped you every weekend as a paid employee. As did your youngest daughter. She was still in school but you allowed her to earn a small wage every Saturday.

You serve the customer in front of you. Smiling as you give her the drinks she ordered. Watching as she takes them over to her table. It was about 10pm on a Wednesday so your bar wasn't overly busy. Only 3 tables had people sat at them. Mainly people who were having a late dinner or a couple of drinks to wind down from their day at work. You turn. Going into the kitchen unit beside the bar. Starting to stack the dishes into the washing machine. Hearing the door open. You call out.

"Be with you in just a second!" You push the washing tablet into the machine. Shutting it and turning it on before going out to the bar with a customer greeting smile plastered on your face. You stop as you see a pair of familiar green eyes. "Dean?" you whisper his name. He smiles at you.

"Hey Kat" he says. His voice soft. You watch him. Almost in awestruck. Blinking a couple of times before shaking your head.

"What-" the word coming out quiet. You cough to clear your throat. Speaking louder this time. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to come and see you" you nod your head sightly.

"I umm. I cant chat right now really. I'm working". He nods. Giving you that familiar smile you recognise so well. Bringing a hand and resting it out onto the bar top.

"Could I get a beer please? And a burger with lots of fries?" You nod. Smiling slightly as your eyes stay transfixed onto each others. You draw your eyes briefly from his gaze. Motioning at the seats behind him.

"Please find a place to sit and I'll bring it over to you". He nods. Bringing his lip between his two teeth before hitting his palm softly onto the bar top. You watch him find a seat as you make his drink before taking it over to him. Placing it down in front of him before going back to the kitchen. Making him his burger and fries before going with them to his table. Placing them down in front of him. His eyes soft as they look up at you. "Is that everything?" He shakes his head. Motioning at the seat opposite him.

"Join me. Please" You look at him. Motioning your hand backwards. Towards the bar and kitchen.

"I can't I-"

"Yes you can. Its your bar after all. You can do what you want right?" He looks at you. A light smirk taunting his lips. You take in a breath. Going to the chair and pulling it out. Sitting opposite him. "How have you been Kat?" You nod. Your eyes watching each others.

"I've been alright I guess".

"How about the girls? Anna must be at college now right?" You nod your head. Shoulders going with you as your upper body nods.

"Yes. She's doing a degree in music plus working here part time. She's looking at renting a place with her boyfriend and she wants to be a musician". He nods. A small chuckle coming from his lips.

"She really is making the most with her life isn't she?" you nod. Smiling slightly. Watching as he picks up his drink and takes a sip from it.

"How about you? How are you?" He puts the glass down. Looking at the amber coloured drink as he speaks.

"Cant complain. I no longer have an angel riding shotgun in my head which is always a plus". You nod. A smile breaking through your lips. Looking back up at you. His lips also turning upwards at your happy demeanour.

"That's brilliant news" you say. He nods. Picking up his burger with both hands and taking a bite from it. You look downwards. Taking in a breath before speaking. "I should get back to work". Chewing a mouthful of burger as he watches you stand up. "I finish as soon as I'm able too if you want to hang about. Joy of being my own boss". He nods. Giving a small chuckle as he looks down. Eyes quickly grazing over your body before going back up to your eyes. A notion that doesn't go by unnoticed by you. You smile at him. Noticing a table having been left during your short period sat with Dean. Going over you pick up the tip they had left you on the top. Clearing it and putting it all in the back.

An hour or so passes. Your last customer leaves. Well, apart from Dean who sits patiently at his table. Standing up he brings his plate and empty glass to the bar you stand behind. Smiling at you as he places them down. You look up at him. Unable to control the smile that comes over your lips as you meet his green eyes.

Shaking yourself out of his gaze. Grabbing a cloth and cleaning spray from under the counter. Going and starting to wipe down every table. He follows you like a puppy. Hands going into his front pockets of his blue denim as he watches you. "I recently had an incident involving a wood nymph". You cross your brow. Looking at him as you pause your motion. He nods. "trust me it was as weird as it sounds". Your eyes stay confused but you turn back to your table. Wiping it down before turning the chairs upside down on top of it. Heading to the next one. "She made me realise a lot of things. Main one being that I should enjoy the little things in life”.

“The little things?” You shoot him a quizzical look. He takes in a small breath. Moving his hand from his jeans to his jacket. Going into his pocket as he takes out a small box wrapped in a plastic bag. Holding it as he gently taps it with his pointer finger. Almost nervous. You've never seen him nervous before.

"We've known each other for over a decade. Hell I think its been nearly two decades. Yet I have never helped you celebrate a birthday or Christmas or whatever else you celebrate". He holds the parcel towards you. You stand up tall. Eyes glance down to the small package.

"Dean I-"

"Just take it before this gets anymore sappy" he speaks. Causing you to give a small chuckle. Placing down the cloth and bottle as you take it from him. Removing the bag. Undoing the white ribbon wrapped around the equally as white box. Slowly removing the lid. Revealing a dainty silver bracelet inside. You cant control the smile that comes over your face. Picking the item up with your index and thumb.

"Its beautiful" you put the wrapping onto the table. Hand cupping under the jewellery piece as you admire it. You look at him. A hint of a cocky smile on his face as he looks at you. His hand coming up and rubbing the back of his neck. You close the space between you. Embracing him in a hug. Arms wrapping around his neck. His hands going to your hips. Tilting your head to whisper into his ear. "Thank you Dean". You kiss his cheek. Moving way slightly so you can admire the item again. His hands still sitting kindly on your hips. Holding you close to him. His eyes watching you. Quickly darting away when you look back up at him.

His hands fall from your warmth as he takes a step back. You pay no mind to this action. To caught up in the sweetness of his gift that his subtle behaviours go under looked by you. "How can I repay you?"

"Its a gift. You don't repay people for gifts". You draw your bottom lip between your teeth with your tongue. Once again closing the gap between the two of you as you press your lips to his. Your hand not holding the item rests momentarily on his cheek. Pulling away just as quickly as you had started. His eyes meet yours. A light confusion but gratification on his face as he tilts his head.

"I said you didn't need to repay me" you give a soft chuckle. Taking a step back. Looking down at your wrist. Starting to put the bracelet onto it. Trying to do the clasp up as you speak.

"That wasn't a payment. It was a way of saying thank you". The bracelet falls back into your hand as you fail at doing the item up. He smiles. His rough hands coming up. Taking the delicate item between his fingers. Doing the catch up for you. His thumb brushing your wrist once its done up. You dart your eyes up. Looking up at him through your lashes. Those green eyes meeting yours. Darting quickly to your lips. His hand still gently stroking your wrist. The other going to your hip as the gap between you closes once again. The space between you shortening as you lean into each other.

TING

He curses himself as you both stop. His phone drawing you both out of the illusion of each other.

TING

It goes off again.

"Someone is obviously missing you". You give a small smile as he nods. Moving away from you as he takes his phone out. Scratching his brow as he looks at the new messages. Your eyes go to the silver adorning your wrist. Your smile growing as you admire the generous gift.

"Its Sammy. He said that he's found a case for us that he wants to check out tonight" he shoves his phone back into his pocket. Shooting you an apologetic look. You smile. Bringing a hand up you gently stroke over his cheek with your palm.

"I get it". He closes his eyes. Leaning into your hand.

TING

He gives an annoyed sigh. Shaking his head as you draw your hand down. Giving a soft chuckle you tilt your head. "Go. Save the world. I'll be here when you get back". He looks at you. His eyes filled with emotion that he quickly hides again. Smiling at you before nodding. Placing a hand on the back of your neck as he brings you forward to quickly kisses your forehead. Moving away as you watch him exit your bar. Hearing the motor of his car start up outside and drive away.

Previous / Next

TAGS: @sojuxxi

[stevesbipanic]

Steve hadn't even remembered the letter.

After everything had happened, after Steve had to leave Eddie's body, had to sit at the bedside of a girl that might not wake up, had to bury an empty box and hold his kids as they were told they were losing Max all over again, the letter was furthest from his mind.

Max's body was too damaged, her mind too post despite El's best efforts. The weight of responsibility and the energy it took every time El tried to bring Max back was killing El too. After the fifth time Max had coded, Hopper had to tell her to not being her back again if it happened.

Three months after they buried Eddie, they buried Max too. The ghost of her was felt in everything they did. When Suzie visited Hawkins for the first time, Max was missed in the party's introductions. When Lucas became captain of the basketball team in junior year, Max was missed in their group hug. When they party graduated, Max was missed in the chair left empty between Darcy Lunce and Paul Meston.

As the kids left one by one to college, following the footsteps of Nancy and Robin years before, Max was missing from their goodbyes.

Steve hadn't been able to leave until he knew the kids were safe and grownup and out of Hawkins. He'd thought about leaving with Robin when she first left, he'd had a panic attack when he started packing. Now the kids were gone he could leave too, the protector could finally rest.

He was moving to Chicago, Nancy and Robin already had his room ready for him. They had understood why he'd had to stay. Most of his items were packed up and loaded into a moving van that the girls had driven back to their apartment. All the was left was Steve's car. He was selling it, he didn't need it in the city and some extra cash would tie him over while he looked for a new job.

He was cleaning it out ready for the buyer when he found it. Dropped between his chair and the gearbox. Perfectly preserved from the day Max handed it to him. At the time he refused to believe he'd ever need to read it, refused to believe he'd lose one of the kids before dying himself first. Yet here he was, alive, and the author of the note was gone.

He tucked the letter into his jacket and finished with the car. Once it had been picked up he still had an hour before the taxi came to take him to the airport. He made his way to the cemetery, it was only fair he say a proper goodbye to her before leaving her to watch over their town. When he arrived at the plot he took a moment to admire the bright flowers the kids had planted years ago, the beautiful mural Will had painted on the back of the headstone.

Here lies Maxine "Mad Max" Mayfield

1972-1986

He took a deep breath and sat down facing her grave, eerily mirroring the girl years before. He took out the letter, carefully opening it and began to read.

Dear Steve,

First off yes of course I'm going to write you a letter, I don't want to hear any self deprecating nonsense when I hand this to you, you're my brother as much as Dustin is and as much as Billy was. People care about you and love you and shut up yes they do.

Second of all if I somehow don't die you better have burned this I don't want you having anything soft and gooey to hold over me if I'm still kicking. If I find out you've still got this I get to drive your car ok?

I should really get to the point of this letter, I'm writing yours while putting off Lucas', I don't know what I'm going to say to him yet, I wish I could ask you to help me but I need to write these myself, he deserves that and so do you. These might be my last words to you and I need you to know a few things and you've got to believe them because if you're reading them it means I'm gone and you have to honour the dead asshole.

It's not your fault.

Listen to me Steve, if this is the last thing I do, if tomorrow everything goes wrong and I can't be berating you for getting hit in the head and you're crying somewhere alone I need you to know it's not your fault.

If I'm dead, if any of us are dead, it's not your fault. We're old enough to make our own choices. If I'm lucky in a couple years I'll be the age you fought a demogorgan for the first time. If I'm dead it's because whatever is down there took me but that's not on you. If I've made myself bait, or run off or done something stupid or brave or sacrificial or we just got unlucky, it's not your fault Steve.

It's not your fault.

If I hear you thinking it's your fault I'm coming back to haunt you.

Love, Max (your favourite)

Steve has to catch a later flight, he doesn't cry until later. Max's words rattle through his brain, years of guilt that he had pushed down slowly bubbled to the surface until he was in Chicago and could sob in his best friend's arms. Whenever he needed to he would reread Max's letter just to remind himself.

It's not your fault.

[frozenmoonshine]

Ok, so, I just randomly decided to make a list of Top 10 hottest (male) TR charcters... No idea why, it just popped in my head, lmao.

I wrote this 97% for the lolz, so don't take it too seriously.

So, here it is:

Top 10 Hottest Guys of Tokyo Revengers

10. MITSUYA - It's common knowledge that he's the Husband Material ™️ of the series! He was introduced as this responsible, mature, reliable guy with a somewhat eccentric hobby, and you may be into the cool, calm, collected, talented, kind ones, who're good with kids and house chores, but you can't convince me that your ovaries didn't do a happy little backflip with his glow-up in the last arc! You just know he's a little devil behind that whole boy-next-door act. 😏

9. SHIN - Ok, throughout the most part of the story, he was just Mikey's dead brother, who Mikey himself led us to believe was weak, generally lame, and a hopeless loser with women. Then we got the flashback chapters in the last arc, and what did we see? Capable, hardworking, caring, loving, selfless, persistant man, strong both in a fight and in holding his ground. Hell, he cared for vegetative Mikey for four years, pretty much all alone, sacrificing his own dreams and life in the process. Also, black turtlenecks and bomber jackets. That's all I'm gonna say.

8. HANMA - Who doesn't love a bit of occasional insanity?! The ultimate troll, both in the verse and in the fandom, tricked us all good! That's just how bored he was. Annoying, completely random and unpredictable, grinning madman who's only there to watch the world burn, by setting it ablaze with his own hotness! I mean, tall, tattoed, well dressed, cocky, handsome bastard, with sleepy eyes, anyone?! I hate the fact that he's giving an inexplicably strong 'boyfriend vibe'! But, I just wanna call him 'Shuuji'... 🤭

7. HAKKAI - This cutie is criminally underrated and slept on! I know Wakui did him dirty by not giving him a more complex personality than just a Mitsuya simp, but look at him! Tall, handsome, strong, blue eyes, lip scar, piercing. No wonder he ended up with a modeling career! And on top of the stunning looks, he's just a pure, shy baby! 🥺 Makes you wanna tease and corrupt the hell out of him! 🤭 Besides, his implied clinginess and loyalty suggest he's a keeper, and if that isn't hot, I don't know what is!

6. MIKEY - The definition and the school example of that old proverb - the strongest poisons are kept in the tiniest flasks. Yes, having incredible fighting prowess is hot, being a capable leader is hot, having endless authority is hot, being "emo" is hot, being painfully cute is hot... We don't care that he's pocket sized (and mentally unstable), with his endless charisma, our favorite gang leader very well deserved his place on this list!

5. WAKA - Simply, he's sexy and he knows it. And we know it. You know it. Your grandma knows it. Everyone knows it. Teen or adult, law abiding citizen or a crime lord, the White Leopard could make anyone anywhere fall for him at the snap of his fingers! ...if he only cared enough to do so, tho.

4. KOKO - Intelligent, smart, sassy, sarcastic, and plain insolent = perfection. This cheeky, well-read, super stylish, handsome motherfucker had us fawning over his strong, passion-driven personality, hidden under the cool façade. What's not to love about a blindly devoted guy?! It doesn't matter if it's the devotion to a cause or a person he deems important (#lucky Inui siblings). But fair be fair, that habit of sticking his tongue out should be X rated...

3. BAJI - If his fiery, man-among-the-men personality, undying loyalty, and endless kindness aren't enough to make you burn like a car, just take a look at that perfectly chiseled face, cocky smirk, and glorious raven locks! Still not convinced? Well, you're either blind, dead, or not into guys at all! We should actually be grateful that his adult version was only ever shown at the very last chapter, cause anything more than that would have been beyond too hot to handle!

2. KAZUTORA - There's just something indescribably magnetic about the whole "redeemed sinner" trope, and that alone would have been enough to get him a spot on this list! But since he also happens to have the handsomest face in the show, a beauty mark under the eye, the cutest smile, a piercing, a tattoo, and a fair amount of badassery and strength, it all sums up to the total of our dear banana tiger being the runner-up!

1. HARUCHIYO - Does this one really need any explanation? Pathological loyalty is beyond hot, wearing a mask is hot, scars are super hot (as already established), suits are hot, piercings are hot, long lashes are hot, pale blond/albino is hot, green eyes are hot, skillfully wielding a sword is hot, smarts are hot, being a little bit deranged is hot... the list could really go on for days, there's literally nothing about him that doesn't make him hot. "...Being a homicidal maniac and a drug addict?" No, he's excused for all red flags on the account of pretty privilege!

[lovelyknifes18]

Alright, here's part two of Sweet child of mine😄

Chapter two: Holy Mary

Across the country in Oregon. Erin's mother, Linda gets out of the car. Thankfully she doesn't have to sit in it for another three days. She would have gone about her day if it hadn't been interrupted. "Hi, Linda! Haven't seen you for awhile. I was afraid something happened to you." The shrill voice of the resident nosey neighbor, Barbara, Is one that nobody can escape. "No, I'm fine."

"Where's your daughter?!"

"My what?" She raised her eyebrows. Barbara shouted louder, as if she wasn't two feet away. "Where's Erin!?"

Linda's eyes slightly widened, thinking fast for a response. "Uh-oh, is she not here? I had a family emergency and left her here with a sitter.

"Well I haven't seen anyone or her around... Oh my God, Linda. You don't think she was-

"I think so." Linda said, as Barbra nodded ran back inside her house, yelling for her husband. "Chet, Cheeeet! Linda's girl has been kidnapped!" So after, the police were searching everywhere for Erin, only to come to the conclusion she was nowhere in the town's limit. Erin's mother and the police chief were bombarded with news crews and reporters as an official statement was made. "Rest assured, we will find the bastards who took this innocent girl. And bring them to Justice."

"If anyone finds my girl, the reward will be $15.000"

An awkward silence fell amongst the crowd, the police chief, Gerald Malone leaned in. "Uh, ma'am. Are you sure you don't want to bump it up?"

"What, it's not like I'll need it since she'll probably be dead- shit, I mean. WHAT'S THE POINT?! IT WON'T BRING BACK MY BABY IF SHE'S GONE!!!" She sobbed dramatically, though if you looked close enough. When she wasn't busy throwing herself into Malone, there wasn't a single tear in her eyes. Meanwhile, a gang from the west coast of California happened to be watching the news. One of them spoke up. "Aye, we could probably use that money."

The assumed leader looked over. "Maybe, but what the hell are we gonna do with $15.000?

One of the three shrugged. "Get new threads? Or maybe a couch."

The leader slightly nodded. "Aight, at least we get to beat some dumbass." The rest of the gang stood up, grabbing baseball bats and other weapons. Including guns. "let's go."

Rockford IL December 12th.

This had to be a dream, it just had to be. But it wasn't. "Here." Erin looked down at the sandwich Jake handed her. "I'm allergic to fish."

"It's tuna."

"What do you think tuna is, Fats?" Erin scoffed Jake chuckled about how he'll take it himself and that she's missing out. "Great, I must be the luckiest girl right now. Out in a shitty town, at a shittier gas station. And was almost murdered by tuna." The two brothers looked back at her, they heard of teenage girls being moody and somewhat, at dramatic. But they've never seen one as close as now, it was a little fascinating. "Geez, are you always this cheerful?" Jake snorted.

"I don't know, have you always been a total loser?" Erin snapped back. Elwood just shook his head while Jake couldn't help but smirk. "Damn, she's quick. I think we'll get along just fine." The car started up again, finally leaving Rockford after staying the night. And almost having the car stolen, again. Elwood was completely lost, how was he supposed to talk to a teenager. Let alone one that was a daughter he never knew about. He cleared his throat, looking back through the rearview mirror at Erin. "Sooo..."

"... So?"

"Are you doing ok in school?" Elwood managed to say, while Erin looked back. "Are you really trying to parent me?" Elwood shrugged, lightly tapping the steering wheel. "I'll assume good, I never understood that crap."

"No wonder, half of the shit they teach us is either misinformed or complete bullshit." Erin replied bitterly, which Elwood shot her what Erin could only assume was a look. "Don't say shit."

"Hey, El. Listen to this shit." Jake turned up the radio, as they listened to a report about a missing Oregon girl. Who had medium length brown hair, eye color described as greyish blue. Light skin, and was 5'4. "Damn, that's a shame." Elwood said. Erin couldn't believe it, they were either very good at playing it cool or were the dumbest people she's ever met. "You got to be kidding me." She muttered. "Don't worry, you'll be fine with us, we just gotta make a quick stop before we really get going."

"A stop where?"

Jake groaned as he already caught on. "Why? She doesn't even have anything to do with this."

"We're going to visit the penguin."

"The what?" Erin said, perplexed by the sudden turn in conversation. "Sister Mary Stigmata. She runs the orphanage we grew up in." Elwood explained. "She's the penguin."

"Right, cause that completely makes sense." Erin remarked sarcastically, which the brothers paid no mind to. "Okay, this couldn't get any worse. Where is this "penguin" at?"

They arrived at the Saint Helen of the blessed shroud orphanage, at this point Erin was wondering if she somehow was hit by a car and was hallucinating as she slowly died from brain damage. "This is serious, isn't it?"

"Yap." Elwood confirmed.

Jake sighed, kicking the ground beneath his feet. "I'm not going in. Not after the last time, she should be thankful they still got the money we did to keep this place open."

"Come on, Jake. We gotta see the penguin."

"You grew up here?"

Jake nodded, stuffing his hands in his pockets as they walked up the stoop. "Yeah, we were raised here. The born part... They don't call it an orphanage for no reason."

As they passed the beds, Erin looked up at the staircase. And the statue of Jesus that hanged above, ominously. "That's one way to instill Christ." She murmured, surprised by how the door had opened itself. A freaking nun? She thought to herself as they walked into Sister Stigmata's office. "Surprising to see you boys again. And I see you brought someone?" Elwood nodded, placing his hand on Erin's shoulder, that she slapped away. "My name is Erin, sister." She replied, as the brothers exchanged glances. "Hey, where the hell was that when- Ouch!" Jake was cut off as he earned a quick wack with the ruler. "Have I taught you nothing? With the way you act I wonder." Sister Stigmata turned to Erin. "That's a lovely name you have, dear. Come sit." Jake looked dumbfounded as Erin got to sit in one of the chairs in front of the desk, while himself and Elwood still had to sit in desks that they've long grown out of. "This is ridiculous."

"Now, what brings you here again?" The sister asked.

"They're helping me get back home, sister." Erin answered, once again throwing the men off by the sudden change in her demeanor. "Really?" Sister Stigmata was surprised, maybe the boys she raised had really redeemed themselves. "A message from God, if you will. To ensure the safe travel of a child of God." Jake interjected, while Elwood just shook his head and looked away. It was clear Jake was just bullshitting. "She's my kid." Elwood clarified, rubbing the back of his neck as he avoided eye contact with the sister. She raised her eyes a bit, before beckoning Erin closer. "Come step closer, dear. I want to get a better look at you." Erin stood up from the chair, and stepped closer. Allowing the penguin to see Erin's features more, after a moment of silence followed the elder nun hummed to herself. "You have the same look your father used to have at your age, definitely turned out a lot more responsible than him and his brother though." Jake slightly stood up, then again it was a little difficult since he was wedged in a child's desk. "Hey, don't let the midget's innocent act fool you. This little shit tried to steal our car!" Jake got another quick wack in the head with the same ruler, as he stumbled back with a groan. "Jesus fucking christ, Jake it's no hard feelings now- Ow!" Elwood yelped as Stigmata grabbed his ear. "You boys still have those bad attitudes, you may have given the money we needed but you're still on the path of redemption." She let his ear go, standing behind Erin as she placed her hands on Erin's shoulder. "Maybe this young girl will do some good, she's your family. Your legacy, Elwood. It's your responsibility to be an example, someone she can look up to."

"So can we go now? Maybe we can catch Curtis on the way out." Jake nudged his brother's arm, Sister Stigmata let out a weary sigh. "I'm afraid he's not with us anymore, the Lord had taken him peacefully in his sleep." The sudden atmosphere had taken a more somber tone, it didn't take much for Erin to figure out Curtis must have been someone very important to Jake and Elwood. "Oh... Okay, let's just get going." Jake sighed as he freed himself from the desk and went straight for the door. Elwood and Erin were the last to follow. "Who's Curtis?" Erin asked, her tone much softer than she previously used with the brothers. "... A damn good guy." Elwood replied, before looking back at the penguin. "Sorry, sister."

"Be careful, and may the Lord bless you on your travels." Erin waved back, snapping her head back as she could have almost sworn that she saw the door close itself shut.

"Jake, you know what this means?"

"That the only man, who was the closest thing we had to a father is dead?" Jake huffed, as his sunglasses were able to conceal the tears that were threatening to fall. "Besides that, don't you see? This was supposed to happen for a reason. She 𝘸𝘢𝘴 supposed to steal the bluesmobile." Jake furrowed his eyes, trying to get where Elwood was going with the comparison. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"It's a message from God."

"A message from God." Jake repeated. "You're not serious right?"

"This is the most serious I've been, this was meant to happen. We were meant to run into her. And I don't care if she is one of those tall dwarfs, she's my kid and your niece. We're getting her home." Elwood declared, while Erin's brows furrowed in confusion. "Why the fuck do you keep calling me a midget?"

Elwood stepped over to her side. "Erin, you might not know a lot about me."

"I don't know anything."

"And I might not know everything about you."

"You didn't even know I existed."

"That's in the past," Elwood looked down at her as he continued. "Like it or not. We're your family, that means you are our family now. And I promise, with our blessed lady of acceleration. We'll get you home in one piece."

"We are gonna have to avoid the cops though, since people think you're missing." Jake said, as he climbed in.

Erin shook her head, looking up at the sun that shined through the clouds. Taking a deep breath as she spoke to herself. "If there is a god, please make sure I don't die or anything." Erin shoved her hands in her jacket, the snow crunching beneath her feet as she joined them in the car. The blues brothers next mission has begun.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Ok, apropos of my "For You" page being a dear and showing me a ton of posts about not being a dick to people for their ships and as someone who came to fandom spaces AFTER graduate school...

The fact that people are losing their minds over ships and noncon in fic BLOWS MY MIND given the Western Canon and historical examples of shippers. I'm putting a cut here for people who don't want to see the lists of messed up shit I read FOR CLASS, but for those of you who are curious, read on, please.

Oh, and before I forget: If your automatic response to this post is "Yes, but you are talking about GrEaT lItErAtUrE, it has something to say and a historical context to think about," then take a second and work your way out of the gatekeep-y stranglehold that academia has on you. If context and message matter in literature, they matter in fanfics too.

CW for masturbation, noncon, dubcon, historical ship wars, main character death, violence...as many Ao3 Archive warnings as I (or you) can think of. Dead Dove, Do Not Eat.

The TLDR is that I have taken significantly more psychic damage from canonical literature than fanfic, and a stupid high number of canon writers fit the definition of fanfic writer.

So in no particular order, here are some of the truly fucked up things I read for class:

A short story where a teenage boy steals his little sister's Ken doll, tears the head off, and jerks off into the Ken doll until the plastic torso is full. You know of what. (This was in the Scribner Anthology of Contemporary Short Fiction, and I'm pretty sure it was AM Homes's "A Real Doll")

A short story where the reader follows a group of kids at Thanksgiving whose parents are doing a laying on of hands to cure their mother's cancer, and while the kids are unsupervised on a trampoline, one of them is bounced aggressively off and breaks their neck in a fall. (Julie Orringer, "PIlgrims")

"The Rocking-Horse Winner" by DH Lawrence, which is read as a masturbation scene in How to Read Literature Like a Professor by Thomas C. Foster

Every single bed trick in any Shakespeare (or other early modern) play is rape by deception (this occurs in All's Well, Measure for Measure, Much Ado [if you squint], and Two Noble Kinsmen). Bed tricks also occur in the Bible, Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, Boccaccio's The Decameron, and Middleton and Rowley's The Changeling. Other examples include Zeus pretending to be Amphitryon to impregnate Alcemene with Hercules and Uther Pendragon taking Gorlois's place to impregnate Igraine. And this isn't an old, unused trope either, it's used as recently as The Rocky Horror Picture Show and Family Guy

Titus Andronicus has rape and cannibalism in it, plus a metric ton of violence, brutality, and lopping of limbs. Romeo and Juliet has murder and an attempted forced marriage. Shakespeare in general is fairly fucked up the more you read it.

There are a metric ton of rapes given in verse too, including Yeats's "Leda and the Swan" and Ovid's "The Rape of Proserpina". A more modern example is the Broadway show Seven Brides for Seven Brothers

Nabokov's Lolita. 'nuff said.

John Ford's Tis Pity She's a Whore has twincest, graphic violence, and a scene in which the male twincest MC gets pissed off that the female twincest MC sleeps with someone else, so he stabs her through her lady bits so far that when the sword comes out, her heart is spiked on the end of it and he spends the entire next scene running around waving this sword with a human heart on it at people

William Golding's Lord of the Flies has a bunch of kids murdering each other for honestly no particular reason

In Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery," a town gets together every once in a while to randomly draw lots to decide who gets casually stoned to death

In William Faulkner's "A Rose for Emily," an entire goddamn town ignores Emily to the point where when her house smells like her dead, decomposing husband so bad that half the town can smell it, nobody bothers to check in on her. She had been SLEEPING WITH HER DEAD HUSBAND for literal years and nobody cared enough to check on her

Edgar Allen Poe's "The Telltale Heart" and "The Cask of Amontillado." I am aware that Poe is a horror writer. Doesn't make it any less fucked up that the protagonists of these stories murder a helpless old man because his eyes were creepy and brick their friend into a basement to die slowly, respectively

Literally all of Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men is deeply fucked up, but the moments that my particular English Class could not get over were the crack about Curly keeping one hand soft for his wife, and the fact that George Old Yellers Lenny at the end

The Giver by Lois Lowry discusses eugenics and both infanticide and euthanasia. I'm not going to sit here and say that NO fanfic addresses these topics, but honestly no fanfic I've ever read made me anywhere NEAR as disturbed as reading this book in FIFTH GRADE did

John Knowles's A Separate Peace has one kid thinking he accidentally-on-purpose murdered his best friend for the whole book

Sophocles's Oedipus Rex has incest, self-mutilation, and murder

Margaret Atwood's The Handmaid's Tale is well-known enough that I don't need to give details, right?

Jean Craighead George's Julie of the Wolves has an attempted underage rape in it

John Gardner's Grendel has a deeply fucked-up relationship with sex and sexuality, and Grendel holds a female character in a split over a fire because of said fucked-up relationship with sex and sexuality

This is nothing CLOSE to an all-inclusive list. So uh...if we aren't going to hold these stories to the moral standards we hold fanfic to, then we should lay off fanfic in general and fanfic writers.

And in no particular order, here are some historical shippers who were powerful enough to change the canon with their ships and fics:

Queen Elizabeth I was SUCH a Falstaff stan that she low-key threatened Shakespeare and insisted that he bring Falstaff back and give the character a happy ending. Hence we have The Merry Wives of Windsor.

Dr. Thomas Bowdler (of "bowdlerize" fame) is objectively a Shakespeare fanfic writer who was not a fan of smut or spiciness. He and his sister Henrietta Maria gave us The Family Shakespeare, a version of the Complete Works that is appropriate for children and women

Nahum Tate was also a Shakespeare fanfic writer--he turned King Lear into a comedy

We also get John Dryden and William D'Avenant fanfic-ing The Tempest, up to and including Dorinda, their OC (do not steal)

Dante and Milton both wrote Bible fanfic in The Divine Comedy and Paradise Lost, respectively

The Arthurian Legends are a goddamn tangled mess of fanfics and fanfics of fanfics that were written by "important white dudes" and so other "important white dudes" decided that the fanon would become canon

SHAKESPEARE HIMSELF was a fanfic writer. He wrote no original plots. He was the Elizabethan EL James but with actual talent

More modern examples? Madeline Miller and Rick Riordan are both writing Greek Mythology fanfics to SIGNIFICANT acclaim

The line between fanfic and adaptation is and has always been ephemeral. Who gets to be "canon" and who is relegated to "fanon" is largely a combination of circumscribing your current intellectual property and rights laws and passion. We don't get to go "canon is always morally fine because it's canon" because honestly I've taken SIGNIFICANTLY more psychic damage from the canon than I ever have from fanon, and at least I know that fanon works are written with love and passion, whereas Charles Dickens was getting paid by the word and IT SHOWS.

Fanfic isn't inherently morally dubious, and canon isn't inherently morally pristine. Fiction has no inherent morality. Worry less about how others engage with fiction, find what you enjoy, and have some fun with it.

[misteria247]

Ok so

The au is called "ghost Katans"

It might have toddler leo, but the backstory behind it is a bit sad

Basically

Toddler leo dies in a krang accident leaving his grieving father and brothers

They grow up and go to the surface

Same shit happens onky this time its minus leo yknow

Karai shows up

Mikey believes in her instead of leo in this

They manage to show her the truth that she's theur sister and splinter is her father

Once they return to the lair and they have their reunion splinter gives karai two twin katanas, twin katanas that were meant for somebody else

He gives it to her saying that it's a hamato heirloom and it'll be better to wield it than the foot's weapons, and he'll train her with them if needed (it's not like someone will use them anyways)

Karai accepts tge gift, not knowing that it wasn't meant fir her, and tge bros and splinter never bother to twll her about the fourth dead brother

So her wielding the katanas awakened a little ghost of a toddler little turtle tot

Now there's a little tot tgar follows her around, asking about what she's doing with his weapons

And she's just confused and scared bcus wtf wtf, shoukd i tell someone?

She tried to talk to raph about the possibility of the existence of another turtle and he just exploded on her in a fit of grief, so she just went "okay, sensitive topic i see" and decuded to not bring up leo to anyone else fearing the same reaction

Onky those who wield the twin Katans have the ability to see, hear, and interact with Leonardo as he is attached to the things

So he mostky follows karai around because she's the only one that acknowledge his existence (that doesn't ease up the hurt and confusion on why his brothers and father keep on ignoring him, but it helps)

So yeah

Turns out karai is an older sister of four turtles and not three, she'll grow accustomed to the tot, she'll live

O.m.g.

DUDE-!!!! I LOVE IT-!!!!!

Like the premise??? Holy hell dude, it'd be like Karai inheriting a ghost artifact only the ghost is this mischievous, sweet toddler who pesters her and she grows to enjoy his company. They start an unlikely friendship/sibling bond and Karai starts to want to figure out why Leo's attached to her swords as well as his cause of death cuz she hates being left in the dark about things. Especially secrets as big as her having four brothers instead of three. There's so much to explore with this concept and ohmigosh the angst!!!! Leo's hurt over his brothers and father not responding to him, as he desperately tries to reach out to them even though he can't. And he's only a child which just makes it hurt even more. And Karai's pain at having something as big as the death of her little toddler brother, as well as the rage she'd feel once she discovers that Kraang are the ones responsible for his death! And Splinter's grief and guilt that haunts him still fifteen years later. And Raph, Donnie and Mikey's grief and despair, the constant feeling that something's missing. That no matter how long time passes there'll always be someone missing amongst themselves and it's soul crushing.

Just dude-!!!

I'm in love with this you're a big galaxy brain my friend omg, omg, omfg-

If you come up with more of this au I'm begging you please tag me in it I'm like in love with this dude you have no idea!!!!

[gwyns]

Genuine question. When did Azriel question his religion? I’ve seen E/riel’s say that he questioned his religion in the bonus chapter for Elain and I’m not sure when he did. Unless when he asked Rhys “what if the Cauldron was wrong”, but other than that I can’t think of when he did.

Recently an E/riel said “my favorite thing about azriel is that his response to elain having a mate that isn't him was basically, "well then this whole continents religion is wrong" which is the most melodramatic thing he could have possibly said. And then he like immediately finds out he was correct and there's no way he's ever going to shut up about it. when he inevitably starts describing her using religious imagery i will simply perish.”

I’ve always seen religious imagery being used for Gwynriel and not E/riel. I’ve thought this for a while now, but I’m scared to say anything (or if one day I want to make edits of them with religious imagery) because I don’t want E/riel’s to accuse me of “copying their aesthetic” (never mind that they copy Feysand’s). But it does make sense, at least to me, to have religious symbolism/imagery for Gwynriel. Gwyn is literally a priestess. Gwyn and Azriel. The saint and the sinner. If E/riel’s use religious as a headcanon then that’s obviously fine. We all have our own headcanons, but if I ever use religious themes for Gwynriel, then I really hope that I don’t get run off of Tumblr because of it.

Also, E/riel’s keep saying that the Cauldron is corrupted and the mating bond is fake (when they were so dead set on their ship being about rejecting the bond), but we already know that the Cauldron is corrupted. This was brought up in ACOMAF and ACOWAR. Shouldn’t E/riel’s also be bringing up Feysand’s and Nessian’s mating bond, too then? And I think the one who decides the mating bond is The Mother or some higher being (SJM herself).

that's because he didn't question his religion, he questioned his self worth. that chapter showed me at least, that az is more religious than i previously thought. he feels like the mother, the cauldron, whoever decides mates, finds him so unworthy that he doesn't deserve a predestined soulmate like his brothers. he feels left out and alone. no where was he questioning anything for elain, he was questioning why elain wasn't "given" to him. i'd even bet he's had similar thoughts about mor before because ultimately it's not about elain or mor or any other woman, it's about himself

he... never ever said anything close to that. like that description of his conversation with rhys is so misconstrued, i'm honestly impressed. they have imaginations, i'll give them that!

gwynriel has had the religious aesthetics since february of 2021 and we've never had to resort to "stealing" from that side but they sure do like to turn around and steal from every other ship in the series! what's that saying, rules for thee but not for me? something along those lines. e/riels stay being the biggest hypocrites i've ever seen

anon, i know this fandom can be scary (especially lately) but i promise you if you decide to share anything like that, the love will outweigh any hate you might receive. and if anyone is giving you a hard time just message me privately and i'll be mean right back to them for you, ok? i would love to see all the lovely things you create and i know every other gwynriel would too!!! 💖

yup! the cauldron being corrupted was like the main plot of feyre's trilogy lol this isn't anything new. but as you and others have pointed out, if the cauldron has made faulty bonds, it wouldn't just apply to elucien. you'd have to call into question every other known bond in the series. but of course e/riels don't think logically, nevermind the fact that mate bonds are decided at birth, at the earliest, and not just something that's made up in the moment like they seem to think

rhys had visions of feyre and believed she was his mate as a human. cassian suspected the same of nesta when she was human. elain and lucien didn't become mates the second she turned, their bond has been written into the tapestries of fate since before either of them were even alive. you'd think they'd learn a thing or two about how the series treats soulmates, or even just the soulmate trope in general, before they try to deconstruct it in their lame attempts at making a "compelling" romance

[wench-and-jezebel]

Dark Angel Reaction: Pollo Loco

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

The pre-episode conversation:

Wench: Here it is.  You ready?  ARE YOU READY??? 

Jezebel: YUSSSSS

Wench: I CAN'T HEAR YOU: ARE YOU READY??!?!?!

Jezebel: YUSSSSSSSSSSS

Wench: Okay.  OKAY.  Here.  We.  Go.

Jezebel: AHHHHHHHHHH! READYYYY????

Wench: YESSS

Jezebel: 3!  2!  3!  4!  5!

Wench: alsdkfjladskjf Gooooo

Jezebel: 4!  3!  2!  1!  GOOOOO

– – – 

GOD DAMN NOW A LIVE CHICKEN…  Ma’am!

Foreshadowing

I FEEL YA OC

I FEEEL YAAAA OC! ☠️☠️

It’s Ben  [Ben ded]  Oh?  [That's what they just said; they found a dead body with a barcode, and it's Ben]  Well now I’m confused

Bby Ben  [He was a storyteller :(]  😭😭😭

Wot?  [Was this about the Nomlies?]  I think yeah lol  [Nomlies are, essentially, Manticore rejects.  Flawed genetics, personalities, etc, to the point that they've been moved to the basement for reprogramming or permanent retirement]

…. Wait.  Wait.  🤔🤔🤔🤔  WAIT.  Isn’t that how she… Is this 🤔🤔🤔  [SPEAK]  Is this the future and the episode is leading up to the death?  [*whistles*]

[Nope.  I just lied to you]  You.  My friend.  Are a *redacted OFMD!Izzy cursing*

[Ma'am didn't say the nickname :(]  LINTLICKERRR  [There we go]  🙂

OOOOHHHH AHHHHH  [This is a thing now :)]  LIKE FUCKING NAILLSSSSS ON A CHALKBOARD

Bruh  [Ma'am didn't even wait for a response]  WHY NOT TELL HIM  [Max is being Max again, what can I say]  *sigh*

[I'm actually starting to recognize the kids this go-round]  

Holy hell deep voice

[I don't know if that kid's dealing with the tryptophan thing btw]

When he said the blue lady was he referring to the Virgin Mary?  [Yup.  Ben storytelling again]

ACKLESSSSS HAS ARRIVEDDDD  [He has indeed]

BUDDY WHATCHA DOING 👀👀👀  [Being homicidal.  As one does.]  

👀👀👀

Well damn

[Okay, look.  I know we know that she was lying.  But to be fair.  It's kinda ridiculous that they act like the kids would all be recognizable.  It's been.  11.  Years.]  Yeah that’s fair… But I mean I think I look like me from 11 years ago ☠️  [You didn't go through puberty in that time tho.  I think they were like.  9]

["Closest thing to a brother"  Bitch, ZACH IS SUPPOSED TO FILL THAT SPOT]  Excuse you Zach doesn’t need to be filling no spots 👀😮‍💨🤢  [MA'AM WATCH THE SHOW]

‘Cause I’m an angsty bitchhhhhhh  *sigh*

[Church]  Time to repent.  Then kill the priest.  Then repent again.  ["There's things, there's…people… feelings that I want to experience differently than I have before"]  🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Awww man… Teef.  That’s brutal.  Blech  [“Summer teef.  Sum 're teef, sum 'ren't”]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

☠️☠️☠️☠️ Noooo

Priest is like… ma’am you gud  [No, she ain't]

I had stuff to say but Ackles has reappeared instead (like an Angel)

Oooh jumpscare

The smileee

The smile is gone  🙁

Uhhh no… I don’t

Speed run  ["Blurring," in the in-universe speak]

☠️☠️☠️ I swear he comes in so randomly WITH GROCERIES  like

– – – 

Wench: What were you saying when Ackles showed up? alskdjf

Jezebel: 😮‍💨😮‍💨  It was a joke and I don’t fully remember it enough to retype ☠️  Ackles just rewired my brain and it erased.  Irrelevant.  Non existent.

Wench: :))) Fair

Jezebel: But noooo the smile at Max 😮‍💨😮‍💨 I-  I swoo— I’m married sir how dare you

Wench: Nooo

Jezebel:  I- I have forgotten how to midpoint! All I wanna do is fangirl rn ☠️ and he’s only been in two scenes

Wench: I almost spilled my cereal at that one alksdjflaksdjf  But I understand completely

Jezebel: Will be a better endpoint

Wench: Aight… on we go?

Jezebel: YESSSS

– – – 

The priest is gonna get ded

“Faith in the lady”  That’s… ok  🤣🤣🤣

Priest is like… shit.  Time to find another line of work

[The eagerness with which he seized on the soldier explanation 😭]  😭😭😭

“The lady”  I’m dying

Oh noooo

I fucking jumped

["I'm not a liar"... murder = okay, lying = not.  This says something]

Ok I see what he’s doing I think

I’d be ded.  “Slide the wot IN WHERE!?!  Pretty boy help!”

“Click”?  Oh, or maybe it was loaded after all

Poor priest

A lot, lady.  A lot

[Poor Ben having a crisis of faith :(]  💔💔💔 Damn.  It be like that kid

Oooop  [He invaded her perch]  He gonna start talking in circles now  [He already did... Devour-coded]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

[THIS IS THE "SHE"!  (The one I said to be concerned about)]  Ohhhh… That wants the kids killed?  [Yup]

[X5-493 = Ben, btw]  494 Alec?  [Yup.  And X5-452 = Max, iirc]

Ohhhhh military Karen  [She calls him Deck]  Milataren… Lintlicker and Militaren.

[Oop- Ben is back.  Important scene!]

Bruh he looked back like oh shit  [She annoys me here too btw.  Like.  bro, your brother is clearly losing himself.  And you're more interested in being bitchy about it than being caring.  “Bet he’d love to figure out what the hell went wrong with you.” Whyyyy did that need to be said?]

Lintlicker is like a fucking dog fighter with his little gaggle of pit bulls

Oh shit, crazy kids  [Azazel-coded]  Ooooof, trueee  [I heard it in his voice alksdj]  

[he wears fine blood well]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  [Sorry, kinda had to]

Logan whatchu doin  [He sneak]

Lintlicker whatchu doin  [He protecc his kid]

Oooop- Logan you been had

["You think because she's so pretty, she isn't as dangerous?"  Bruh, there was a whole unit designed to use attraction as a weapon asldkfj  *cough cough* Alec]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

[I'd be concerned about Ben too, tbh]

Ooooop  [“Do you hate yourself that much?”  Yes  He does.  Have you not been watching?]

[This woman sees her brother losing himself and is like.  Aight.  I got this.  Let me make it worse!]  ☠️☠️☠️

AHHHH 

NOOOOO 

THE SAD

OMG HIS HEIGHTTT.  It’s visible here

YOU COULDN’T HAVE DONE THAT THE WHOLE TIME???  [Her physical acting there was so weird]

Ooooop

Oh.  The forest.  THE forest.  Ack.  ACKKKK.  [:)]

[This man playing the actual original comic book villain: "It seems his faith wasn't strong enough."]  RIGHT

OH CRAZY SMILE

BRUH

HOLY SHIT

Oh.  Oh that’s broken.  Ack

OH SHIT

ACK

AAAAAAACK  ["Ben, I can't carry you; we'll both get caught"  Bitch, tell that to your pilot-episode self]

ACKKKKKKK

HIS VOICE  [I KNOW]

ACHKKS

Nooooooo

Why couldn’t you just do it

Why

We don’t need a story

Ack

Ooooof

Ack  [Coherency has gone bye-bye]

Welp… Ack

Mood, Max

I’m

Um

Ack

Also tho.  The thing back then isn’t entirely fair they were kids

The priest is gonna be like…. Nope

[Priest survived, but he also has a weirdo barcode tattooed on his neck, and that's gonna make his life hella tricky in s2]  Ohhhh, he comes back?  [Nope.  They forget about it.  But everyone learns about the Manticore barcodes.  And that's the main way of IDing transgenics.  So like… Buddy boutta get slammed.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Fair

– – – 

Jezebel: So, like, endpoint….  What even is an endpoint?

Wench: "Ack,” perhaps?

Jezebel: What even is life?  I’m not ok

Wench: I broke you alskdjf

Jezebel: … Ack.  Which is like ack…les. So even more ack.  I hope you and the minions are satisfied.  Evil.  Evillllll!  ACKKKK!!!!!  I AINT EVEN GET ANY JAM PONY TO MAKE IT BETTER

Wench: Okay, but s2 is better!  Alec is only three episodes away!

Jezebel: I got two seconds of OC- THAT’S A WHOLE THREE HOURS AWAY!  😭 180 minutes

Wench: Do you see what I mean about it being the best episode of season 1 though?

Jezebel: Yes!  It very much so was!

Wench: HAH!

Jezebel: Also noooooo the titleeee makessss sense nowwwwww!!!  Ackkkkkkkkk  What am I doing with this pain????  It’s like a reverse gift

Wench: You just kinda acked your way through the emotional scenes; I sent the script so you can compose your thoughts :)

Jezebel: Ohhhh.  Well… That was a lot of 😦 Like, I get him going crazy.  Also, I think I missed a part of Logan saying he had been doing this for a while (How long is the part I missed)

Wench: I don't think they said how long it was.  But, regardless, Lydecker's been covering for Ben.  Shutting down the investigations and all.

Jezebel: And, about that… On one hand I could go the anti Lintlicker route and say he’s only covering his ass because the woman wants to put them down and he doesn’t want to. And it’s nothing about him caring about them or anything.  But I could also go the pro Lydecker route and say he was trying to cover it up to get to him so they could in his eyes fix the problem and he would have another “kid” home.

Wench: I think it's probably a mix of both, tbh. He does care about them, but, like we've discussed, in a twisted kinda way?  So it might have been a "bring him home if we can" kinda thing.  And… thoughts on Max?

Jezebel: She was meh at best this episode but the end, with the story, I really felt for her.

Wench: Yeah, I get that.  I don't fully agree --- I think her handling of the Ben situation was pretty atrocious, tbh, even if it did end up working for a bit --- but otherwise... yeah, not bad.  And the end was kinda hard to fully hold against her.  (Also, talk about a picturesque death scene alsdkfj)

Jezebel: Right?! Like, oh, let’s have this lovely scenery, and plop a dead kid in his sister’s arms… oh, and sister is the murderer… Like… Wot?  Ack

Wench: Also, the childishness of the way he was speaking tho 😭

Jezebel: I KNOWWW  😭😭😭😭  Budddyyyyy

Wench: Honestly, the character as a whole has that quality.  He's so... beseeching.  Legitimately, all he wants is someone to understand 😭  He tries to get that with the priest in the confessional --- "I'm a soldier"--- and with Max at the tower --- "Don’t tell me you don’t wake up with the sound of your heart pounding in your ears." --- and then again with Max at the end.  Even the goading-Max-into-hitting-him bit.  He wanted her to understand the violence and she didn't even give him that 😭

Jezebel: 🥺🥺🥺 I just 😭😭😭😭 He’s such a good actorrrrr  😭😭😭

Wench: Agreed... *sigh*  But there ya go!  Ben episode!

Jezebel: *sigh* indeed!

Wench: Final thoughts?

Jezebel: … ACK

[sayakxmi]

[Magi reread] Night 39: Incident

YOU LYING. LIAR. I LOVE YOU, BUT FUCK YOU

And he's so happy ;_; He doesn't know yet

Why the fuck you lyinnn, why you always lyiinnn

I mean, I can guess why, but also damn, I wonder how his life looked, like, in more detail than what we get

:)

UMMM OH MY GOD

Locked in the castle.

Also, I fucking can't. The way Ohtaka draws expressions. Like, Alibaba looks borderline traumatized, but look at Cassim. You literally can't tell what his feelings are. Is it fondness? Is it pity? Is he scheming? Insnae. You sense all three if not more.

AAAAAAAAAAA STOP FUCKING LYING

I don't even know for what I am in pain here, bro. Is it because of Cassim lying about his dead sister, or about the heartbreak Alibaba's about to exprience in a few months.

Also, the fact that Alibaba gets betrayed over and over again by the people he loves, ugh.

"Admiration". But is it admiration. What is this. I love how ambiguous Cassim's feelings are. Is iat admiration? Is it fondness? Alibaba didn't change at all? Is it disappointment? Does he think Alibaba's a moron? Tbh, in most cases my money is on "All of the above". It's an interesting thing abt Alibaba, or rather how certain people (like Cassim or Hakuryuu) feel about him. They love him and hate him at the same time, want him to stay by their side and get lost, they want him brought down to whatever they perceive their own level to be, at least, and they want him to remain untainted & keep shining so brightly. It's such a... mess. I really love it about these relationships. That being said, it genuinely sucks to be Alibaba there, because of all these mixed signals they give him all the time. That weird pedestal they put him on, and now they're mad about it. To paraphrase, he's not responsible for what they believe him to be, and yet they make him pay for it.

On a different note, I love the wording. "Cassim didn't have to hear that much, but Cassim didn't need to hear that much." Foreboding.

...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OOF. Ok, but that's how I was reminded that there were other people there, so Alibaba probably became a laughingstock of that group, oof

ALADDIN'S. EXPRESSION.

BRO'S ABOUT TO START CRYING, OH MY GOD, HE FEELS SO MUCH

Wait, what else did he tell him?

Also, Alibaba's low self-esteem, and then Rashid doesn't fucking help by saying, yea, there's literally nobody else I can choose, so.

Like, bro.

Father of the year, smh

The fact that Alibaba only began seeing Rashid as more than a unreachable figure is after he'd admitted that he loved Anise. He actually says next page that it's only after that that he began recognizing him as his father.

So, Alibaba doesn't say no simply bc he didn't feel like being a king. He thinks it'd make a mess in the country. There's probably some self-esteem issues involved, too, but also he does make sense. He'd said that some people in the palace began talking to him and all, not that all of them were on his side. It could've lead to a civil war. It was, in fact, a pretty understandable concern.

Alos, ugh, the fact that he wants to revive the slums & get Cassim & everybody to help;;;

And then the king leaves stuff to him. He's, like, 14.

: ' )

Oh no : (

Also, now I'm thinking abt the Moon again. It feels, like, symbolical. Yeah, yeah, I'm very smart for this one. Jokes aside, though, as I've said, Aladdin's kinda Moon-coded, so the Moon, especially full, represents something positive - guidance, maybe fate. So the lack of the Moon likely means the opposite - going against fate, depravity.

Bro, that breaks me a little. He's so confused, but immediately assumes something positive. That Cassim came to see him. But of course he didn't.

Gdi, what a thing to stumble upon.

Choosing is hard. But, like, jokes aside, I can't blame him for hesitation. He's forced to choose between his brother and the greater good, how can he make it?

whack

Why tf is he so pretty tho.

bro

I am. In so much pain. God. And that contrast between the palace fire & all these horrifying silhouettes and Alibaba's precious memory of playing with Cassim and everybody. It just hurts.

[krakenjoy]

I'm 6 hours into the Pale Beyond on Steam and I'm enjoying it a lot. It's a survival management game where you balance resources and maintaining loyalty. It's got the Terror vibes, since the Franklin Expedition and the Endurance expeditions were direct inspirations. There's a character who I think looks like Cornelius Hickey who's background probably isn't the cleanest, and the doctor has Goodsir vibes. Someone says 'this place wants us dead'. The characters and narrative are intriguing. Also you get to pet dogs (I have a bad feeling about this).

It's difficult to not reset the game every time you mess up, and the game would prefer you not do that, since you have to restart the entire week. It's not just because of a more beneficial choice, but I also don't want to upset the characters.

Speaking of the characters, I did not expect to get attached this much. Even though you mostly interact with the specialists, the majority of them are given enough characterization to make them stand out. It should be quite easy getting a good/neutral response once you have a grasp on their personalities, generally just respect them and don't pry too much. Just do what they want you to do or find a neutral point.

Moving onto resource management. The most common resource you'll get is food, but besides eating, you also have to burn them for warmth. It's not hard to keep the crew happy so far, so you could alternate between half rations and half heat each week and be fine, which is what I should've done. If people get sick, there are ways to immediately heal them, or if you don't want to waste resources, send them to the doctor and they'll be fine next week. But it's still a hard choice if you like the characters as much as I do.

There are some bugs, like resource cards turning black when I click them even though I can add more and a few letters extending far beyond my screen (might not be wide screen optimized yet). I also experienced a loading problem besides the game screen popping out. It's not a huge issue (or I'm just used to Fallout New Vegas), and devs are fixing them.

Even if you're not a Terror fan, give it a go if you like narrative-driven strategy games with an interesting cast and brilliant art style.

SPOILERS up to Act 2, maybe beyond!

I have a tendency to spoil endings for myself. I didn't watch any youtube videos, but I did go on the steam forums and read some reviews. But first:

I thought Templeton was definitely going to stab me in the back somehow (judging from one reviewer), but up till now he's just being pragmatic and giving sound advice, if not a little suspicious. It's not hard to get on his good side. And wow, the plant metaphor really suits him! Please don't stab me in the back.

Grimley, on the other hand... it's ok if you don't completely trust me, but you don't have to sing about it to everyone, especially if we're going to be stuck together for a long time. Seriously, everyone is loyal to me but him. What the hell do I have to do to make him at least tolerate me? Cool song though.

I knew Hammond was going to fight someone sooner or later. Great work ethic borderlining on obsessive, but if I tell him to take a break he'll be pissed. Hopefully with Timmy helping, he'll worry less. Nice sense of humour.

Kurt is fine, surprisingly not that arrogant for a celeb. He's definitely insecure about his age and use of a cane hindering his ability to help, but he's still knowledgeable.

Junior is more sociable and receptive, but I'm still suspicious of him, considering his closeness to Captain Hunt and his brother.

Kasha is nice and super helpful for morale. It's great that she warms up to the crew, especially Arthur and Kurt.

Speaking of warming up (heh), Arthur's relatable with his social anxiety and need to be reassured. He does start bonding with the others. Besides that, there's Cordell with her love of singing and theatre and dogs.

The character development is amazing. The most heartbreaking part for now is when all the characters say they might not make it back and tell you to look after their family/tell their family etc.

Other memorable characters include science couple, science gun guy, Thomas Blanky vibes, the gymnast, and Timmy and his da. Also Grips who told me was in the military (because I picked colonial).

Leave the ship a week after announced, before dinner.

Get the medical supplies for the expanded bed space, one set of digging tools, and the guns to get more food and defend against the seal asap. Use the shotgun if you don't wanna die!

Don't hesitate because you want to please both characters.

Theory:

The expedition is funded by the canned peach company. (Huh. Tins.) Templeton and most of the science staff are botanists. Why would you need botanists in the cold?

Captain Hunt said something like 'if I don't take this then others will'. Then he got drunk and left. It's definitely related to the expedition.

On the forums and in the achievements, I saw something about a 'tree' and 'fruit'.

The Viscount went to look for the Tree five years ago and vanished. The peach company hears about this and wants to find the tree and make money off the fruits, or the fruits are magical somehow and they want to exploit it. They organize the expedition in the name of finding the Viscount and send Templeton and the scientists to study the Tree. Hunt hears this somewhere, doesn't agree. He takes the job, deliberately choosing the path so we would get stuck in the ice, ignoring Kurt's advice. He sets off with some trusted crew members and leaves to find the Tree so we don't get to it. The rescue ship is to bring the harvested fruits back.