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eloisemeadows · 1 year ago

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i'm begging you please to come home

Song/Skeleton: Cecilia

Name: Eloise Meadows

FC: Sophie Skelton

Age: 32

Birthday: December 24

Gender & Pronouns: Cis-woman, she/her

Sexual & Romantic Orientation: Heteroromantic & heterosexual

Occupation: Receptionist/Guest Services for the Birch Bay Travelodge

Neighbourhood: Born and raised in Birch Bay, currently residing in a tiny apartment in Willowdale

Positive Personality Trait(s): Warm, friendly, idealistic, independent, supportive

Negative Personality Trait(s): Stubborn, people-pleasing, emotionally-driven and oversensitive, envious, insecure

Extras: Here is a little baby playlist that is era-appropriate to set the vibe! Please Mister Postman - the Marvelettes Here Comes the Sun - the Beatles I Say a Little Prayer - Aretha Franklin Do You Believe in Magic - the Lovin’ Spoonful Chapel of Love - the Dixie Cups Wouldn’t It Be Nice - the Beach Boys I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) - Four Tops I Will Follow Him - Peggy March I Walk the Line - Johnny Cash Love Me Do - the Beatles Yesterday - the Beatles You Can’t Always Get What You Want - the Rolling Stones I Want to Hold Your Hand - the Beatles You Send Me - Aretha Franklin Put Your Head on My Shoulder - Paul Anka Fly Me To the Moon - Frank Sinatra Then He Kissed Me - the Crystals All You Need is Love - the Beatles Blackbird - the Beatles A Sunday Kind of Love - Etta James If I Can Dream - Elvis Presley This Magic Moment - the Drifters Hold Me Tight - the Beatles Oh!Darling - the Beatles If I Fell - the Beatles Across the Universe - the Beatles And some songs that are not era-appropriate but fit the vibe: Mirrorball - Taylor Swift The Archer - Taylor Swift The Man - Taylor Swift The Lakes - Taylor Swift Lavender Haze - Taylor Swift Tied Together with a Smile - Taylor Swift Mine - Taylor Swift (...you might be sensing a pattern here) She Used to be Mine - Sara Bareilles Fight Song - Rachel Platten Better Place - Rachel Platten Sunlight - Hozier I Can’t Breathe - Bea Miller Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol Waking up Slow - Gabrielle Aplin Grace - Kate Havnevik Stand in the Rain - Superchick Wildflowers - Tom Petty Dancing Queen - ABBA (1976 so CLOSE) Dandelions - Ruth B. Don’t You Worry Child - Swedish House Mafia (though I prefer the Madilyn Bailey cover) And a pinboard! https://www.pinterest.com/rachaelredridinghood/heavens-got-a-plan-for-you/ BIOGRAPHYtw: mentions of religion/religious upbringing (not detailed, just mentions), gender roles, war

In a home where she wanted for nothing, she somehow wanted for everything she did not have. From a young age, Eloise craved the great wide somewhere that only existed in the depths of her imagination. Eloise was born and raised into the warm embrace of what was the picturesque family: a dutiful father who worked hard to support their family, a doting mother who was there for every moment of every day of Eloise’s childhood, and Eloise was the final piece to the puzzle that was their white picket fence life. Her childhood was marked by dusty wooden pews on Sundays with lace gloves and stiff-skirts, hot humid days spent in her mother’s ever-so-loved-and-tended-to garden, brunches and tea parties with her mother’s friends at least once a week and ever-important trips to the library to add to the stacks of books in her room. While her upbringing was steeped in the belief that her purpose was to become the image of her mother, an adoring wife and mother tending her own family and her own garden with her own brunches, the books she read were something of a guiding light that showed her another way. Fairy-tales, adventures and stories of the great and fantastical had Eloise dreaming of life outside of what she had been raised to believe was proper and expected, though those dreams were generally squashed just as soon as they came to light; more time in the garden, more time spent with her mother and her friends, that was what she needed. Less books would do her good.

In truth, it was more her father that was to blame for her ambitions with the example that he set. His influence on his daughter was strong, and Eloise was always over-interested in his work at the hospital. His care and compassion for the people of their town ran deep and left a defining mark on her young mind. An interest in medicine sparked when Eloise was hardly in double-digits, and despite her father’s appreciation for his daughter’s interest in his work, her parents doubled down on their insistence that Eloise live a life of domesticity. Her father worked hard so that his wife and daughter would not have to, and that was the future he wanted for his daughter.

Eloise kept those dreams on the backburner, learning that it was easier to keep those thoughts to herself than to bring it up again. Her aspirations and dreams fell on deaf ears, and it was better to stay quiet than have that fire extinguished time and time again. She focused on school, still spending her time with her nose pressed into books at every available turn. In every way, it appeared that she had reluctantly conformed to her parents’ wishes, even if she still yearned to follow in her father’s footsteps. It was easier to go with the current than against it, even if it left Eloise feeling like her future wasn’t her own.

It was hard, trying to find purpose when her path in life felt so rigid and out of reach from what she wanted. He made it easier, giving Eloise something to focus on that wasn’t doom and gloom or frustration. He made her smile, and at first that was enough; soon, she realized that he and he alone could make her heart pound right out of her chest in a way she had only read about, and it was twice as meaningful because she had chosen him. Naturally, her parents didn’t approve, but that was something she chose to ignore. Truthfully, it gave her just the slightest bit of satisfaction. She’d yielded in so many other ways, but in this way she would not.

Her parents were displeased when she began to work for the Travelodge shortly after graduating from high school, but Eloise found joy in being able to provide for herself even in just a part-time manner. Their opinions were still ringing loud and clear like church bells on Sunday: it was temporary, they insisted, as she’d marry and have a family of her own soon and then she’d be able to stay at home and live the life they dreamed. Of course, every time she brought up marriage or engagement or anything long-term with the man she’d chosen, she was met with objections. He did not fit the bill they’d ordered, and in their view was just as temporary as her job.

Even with the sense of fulfillment from her part-time gig and the happy hours spent with who she believed to be her one true love (just like in those fairytales, all those years ago), she couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something missing. The call towards medicine was still so strong, though she’d never even applied to college. She knew her parents would never approve, and despite her age she still sought their approval. She ached and longer for her life to mean something and knew she would never find purpose from behind a service desk, or with a stupid cross-stitch or book in hand on a porch swing.

And then came the war, and the draft. And then he was gone, and what meaning she’d found for herself in life felt as though it was slipping through her fingers. Time to break out those old and well-worn rosary beads, keep them in her pocket, taking time to finger through them during quiet moments with the thought of his quick and safe return the only thing on her mind. Eloise missed him in a physical way that she could not escape, and adjusting to contact only through letters was strange and took more time than she liked to admit. Work was a welcome distraction, though even that couldn’t help her thoughts from wandering: what would happen if she lost him? Who would she even be if she lost him? Best not to think about it, but she’d never been good at keeping her thoughts in line with what was best for her. Best to put her energy into those letters, writing her heart onto the paper to send away to him. Her heart was always safest with him, after all, even in a warzone. So she’d pour it all out for him, bleeding onto the paper along with the lipstick marks and a few spritzes of the perfume he’d always liked best.

They’d be married when he got back, they’d decided. There was no reason to wait any longer, even if her parents disapproved. Hell, maybe she’d finally mail those college applications away finally and take a dive at two dreams.

If he made it back. When.

#stillwater.eloise #bio #i need to redo my tags but this will do for now lol

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ryukyuan-sunflower · 4 years ago

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Response to the Moral Question of the MugenxFuu Romance

This is a full response to an anonymous ask I received:

“Can I ask why you ship fuugen? Isn’t Fuu a minor and Mugen is 19.”

This is a rather...complex and loaded question. There’s multiple things to address but I’ll start simple and work up from there. I will first go into my personal feelings on why I ship the pairing, evidence, and then the more complicated concept of the character’s ages both in reality, as well as in the fictional anime. Hopefully it will alleviate some distress on the issue. If it doesn’t, and you consider the age gap morally unacceptable, then it might unfortunately serve to make Mugen out to be a morally questionable character, implied romance aside.

The Simple Question: Why do I ship it?

I ship Mugen x Fuu because it’s implied canon by the creators.

I believe strongly, and have found and provided plenty of evidence in my numerous other posts that support my belief, that Mugen and Fuu were written to have romantic feelings for one another. These feelings were never addressed, acted upon, nor explicitly spelled out for viewers. But the subtle implications of their unsaid feelings added up, episode by episode. The interviews of Shinichiro Watanabe, Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato only solidify my interpretations and findings.

The actual anime aside, here are the links to my posts concerning the interviews, if you are interested.

-Shinichiro Watanabe about Mugen’s Character.

-Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato about Fuu’s Feelings for Mugen in the Roman Album.

I adore the entire cast of Samurai Champloo, as much as by themselves as I do as a trio. I love Jin just as much as Mugen and Fuu. However, I do not see any implication of Jin having romantic feelings with either of them. His romance is canonically with Shino and his role for Fuu feels more brotherly and fatherly to me.

Personally, I am not a “crack shipper”. I am not someone who typically likes two characters and pairs them off together for my own amusement. I have nothing against crack pairings, nor their shippers, but it is not my taste. I enjoy romances that have some type of evidence or backing behind it. So it is not as if I simply ship Mugen and Fuu because I like Mugen more than Jin.

If hypothetically, all the things that happened with Mugen and Fuu happened with Jin and Fuu—if Jin saved her constantly, if Jin and Fuu had strange, intimate moments like the wrist grab scene, if Fuu jumped in the way to save Jin’s life, if Fuu cried for Jin seven times, if Fuu’s voice brought Jin back from death, if Jin gave up his sword for Fuu—well, I would not be a fan of the Mugen and Fuu ship. I’d be a fan of Jin and Fuu.

But that is simply not how the anime was written.

On that same note of liking an implied romance, I am not as interested in blatant romance stories either. Implied, subtle romance is so interesting because it leaves enough clues that one has to find themselves, and then you are able to make your own interpretations and “what if” scenarios surrounding it. This is why I enjoy the story types of, say, the Souls video game series and its related titles. (Demon’s Souls, Dark Souls, Bloodborne, Sekiro). The story lines have to be figured out, and while there is evidence and clues dropped all over, nothing is ever specifically stated. But even so, we can come to solid conclusions that are difficult to disprove, but also never fully confirmed.

Samurai Champloo spells out very little for viewers. Example: Never does the anime state what island Mugen is from. We only know it’s in the Ryukyus. But based on historical evidence, and also symbolism in the show (the paantu and the trees in his flashback) we can assume it’s Tarama-shima or another island in Miyako.

Never do Mugen and Fuu state they have feelings for one another, but it’s in subtle dialogue, numerous times. Most blatant however, is when Sara tells Mugen “It’s as if you’ve never been loved by anyone.” and then Fuu proves her wrong by saving his life by throwing her own in the way, only seconds later.

Their actions fascinate me. Both Mugen and Fuu demonstrate self sacrificial behavior for each other, and show how much they care with actions rather than words. Most of all, I enjoy the romantic trope of “love leads to a character’s redemption.” Mugen’s feelings for Fuu is what redeems him from the sins of his past, and saves him from a life without meaning and only pain, anger and hatred. These aspects of his dark character are highlighted both by the dialogue of Mukuro in Episode 13 and Sara in Episode 21. Fuu being his redemption is also symbolized in her saving him on three separate occasions. The last incident, when she calls him back from death and the Paantu taking him away, is the most symbolic of his “redemption”.

Samurai Champloo is a direct response to the cynicism of Watanabe’s previous work, Cowboy Bebop. Where revenge and the past consumes Spike, ruining his future and love, Mugen is redeemed by love and is able to face his past and press on.

Here is a fantastic article about the concept of Mugen’s love for Fuu being his redemption and also being a direct response to Cowboy Bebop.

All of this aside, because of the second comment, I’m assuming that this isn’t necessarily what you were asking.

“Isn’t Fuu a minor and Mugen is 19?”

I’m guessing you’re implying that either the romantic pairing is impossible due to their age gap, or it’s morally wrong.

I was conflicted how to answer this, at first. I know this can be a triggering topic. So I decided on providing several explanations. I hope at least one answers the question properly, or at least sheds some light on the issue.

Either it will justify why there is nothing morally reprehensible about the Mugen x Fuu romance, or, it will unfortunately show that Mugen is morally questionable, depending on how the evidence is taken.

First, at 15, Fuu is not a minor in her time period. Second, Mugen is either 19 or 20 depending on the source.

Samurai Champloo is not set in one specific year of history, as the anime is not only anachronistic, it historically takes place in multiple years that could not coincide. In essence, Samurai Champloo is not one year, but “a chanpuru of one whole era.” This era is the Edo/Tokugawa era, which includes the years of 1603-1868.

In the Tokugawa Era, Fuu is considered an adult. She is a young adult, yes, but in the eyes of everyone, she is an adult. This is both historically accurate, and is also demonstrated numerous times in the anime. Fuu’s sexualization and her being seen in a romantic way is never frowned upon by any of the characters in the entire series.

Brief disclaimer: Nowhere in my love of the Fuugen pairing or fan interpretations of the characters’ futures, do I see any sort of sexual relationship between Mugen and Fuu developing when she is 15. After they part ways, is where I like to make my fan conclusions on them meeting again when she’s older.

I also want to clarify here and now, that I’m not a supporter of a 15 year old entering a romantic relationship of any kind, let alone a sexual one in real life. I think that teens should work on themselves and not get swept away by romance and sexuality, especially frivolously. It’s irresponsible and dangerous. But, it’s also unrealistic to believe all young people will never fall in love, whether it’s fake or real. If there happened to be a man who was 5 years older than a girl and the two did develop feelings for each other, I believe nothing should be pursued between them until they are both of age.

Adulthood in the Tokugawa Era

I want to first talk about the concept of Fuu being a minor. In short, she is not a minor in her time period.

To begin with reality first, the life expectancy hundreds of years ago was much lower than now. In Japan now, the average life expectancy is in the 80s. But hundreds of years ago, it was estimated to be about 50. Women in particular had the complication of fatality from childbirth. Led makeup, childbirth, and also STDs were a huge threat for courtesans of the time period as well. Many women died in their twenties.

As for the concept of ”adulthood”, the adult age of 18 only started in the Meiji Restoration (late 1800s- early 1900s) when Japan contacted the west and emulated its practices. The age of 18 being an adult nowadays is largely based on the setup of the education system. Whether 18 is too young or too old is a matter up for debate and varies country to country.

Specifically, in the Tokugawa Era, the age of adulthood was considered when one entered puberty. This was generally 15 for a male and 12 for a female.

Here is a link to the full article on the topic of the shifting coming of age, if you are interested.

In the case of aristocratic children, such as boys raised as samurai, the Genpuku ceremony that transitioned children to adults varied in age. During the early Tokugawa era, it was 15-17, while later into the Tokugawa era, during less civil unrest, the age dropped to as low as 13. At this age, these young men could then marry and were likely pressured to do so. Marriages in the Tokugawa Era were very different than nowadays as well. Many nobles and royalty had their daughters married off at young ages such as 8 years old.Though, the sexual nature of these relationships did not develop until the girl was likely of child bearing age, which was in the teens.

Taking the historical 12 year old age into account, Fuu being 15, is then already three years into adulthood.

Fuu’s Depiction as a Woman in the Anime

In regards to Fuu’s maturity, she has no guardian, nor caretaker, which shows she is an independent adult making her own decisions. Yes, Mugen and Jin are her bodyguards, but they are not her legal guardians, because she does not need one. It is her who commands them and leads them. After they part ways, she is fifteen years old (perhaps a year older based on the time span of the anime) traveling the country alone.

She was forced to grow up very fast. Not only is she an orphan, but Fuu’s resourcefulness allows her to survive on her own. She tricks two complete strangers to escort her across Japan. But Fuu is fully functional as an adult, arguably more than Mugen or Jin in some ways. She works, fishes, cooks, sews, tends to wounds etc. Fuu is by no means innocent to mature situations either. She’s seen Mugen and Jin kill numerous people in front of her, which is traumatizing in itself.

In regards to Fuu’s sexualization,on separate occasions, there are bath scenes in the anime, showing Fuu partially nude. There are also scenes of her undressing. Morally correct or not, it is clear she was sexualized like many young anime females.

Aside from that, here are examples of male characters viewing Fuu as an adult woman, romantically or sexually.

Episode 3 and 4: Fuu is thrown in a brothel. While the legality of her being forced against her will just for the sake of paying off a debt is somewhat in question, the fact that she is 15 in a brothel is not. Brothels were not an undercover organization. It was completely legal in Tokugawa Japan, and Fuu being 15 as a courtesan was not illegal. When an ugly rodent man buys her, it’s served as comedy.

Episode 5: Fuu becomes a ukiyo-e model, the backwards beauty, for Moronobu Hishikawa, who was a real historical figure. This grown man, probably around Jin and Mugen’s age or maybe older, also is not considered a creep for his attraction to her. In fact, it’s not even considered wrong that he paints a nude picture of a 15 year old. Again, because she’s deemed a woman in this time period.

Episode 8: Nagamitsu, who is leagues older than Mugen and Jin, asks Fuu to become the “harem of his heart”. He is attracted to her, sees her as a younger version of his wife when he first met her, and even asks her on a date, to which she accepts. This entire interaction is played off as comedy, and not that he’s some creepy grown man attracted to a minor. More like, he’s a bumbling buffoon. His two sidekicks, the beatboxer and Ogura do not intervene, nor make a comment that it’s wrong he is interested in a 15 year old when he’s in thirties or forties. Because quite simply, in this time period, it’s not wrong.

Episode 16: Okuru tells Fuu that “a woman with a healthy appetite is a good woman” when she is devouring fish.

If you stand firm that it is still morally wrong and all these characters were creeps for being interested or saying these words to a 15 year old, that is fine. If you think it is morally wrong to ship Mugen and Fuu because of the age gap, and refuse to believe that the two are an implied romance, that is fine too. I can’t convince everyone.

However, I will make the counter argument then, that liking Mugen as a character means liking a morally questionable character. Romance and feelings aside, the reason for this is simply how he treats and talks to Fuu.

Mugen’s Questionable Dialogue to Fuu

If shipping them is wrong, then what Mugen directly says and does to Fuu is just as wrong. In my opinion, it makes it weirder if he doesn’t develop feelings for her.

Episode 2: In the original Japanese dub, Mugen tells an unconscious, intoxicated Fuu that he’s going to rape her. “Okasu kureru” is the dialogue.

The English changes this to “Let’s strip her and dump her.”

Episode 11: When Fuu asks why Jin needs to go see a woman when she’s around, Mugen then responds “Because you’re flat chested”, not to be confused with “You’re a child.” When she says her kimono makes her look slender, Mugen calls her a liar and then says “Show me.” He asks Fuu to undress for him and show him her breasts...

Episode 20: Mugen stands up naked for Fuu in the hot spring even though she’s clearly flustered. Exposing oneself to a minor is an offense in the modern era. But he doesn’t stop there. He berates her, and then peeks his head out to look at her naked too.

All of these examples are meant as fluff and comedy too, no matter how offensive they can be. It also implies his attraction, interest and his consideration that she is indeed a woman. This is then furthered in his dialogue with Jin.

Episode 12: When they read Fuu’s diary, Mugen asks the odd question to Jin. “Man to man, what do you think of her?” This “man to man”, implies Mugen wants to know how Jin feels about Fuu as a woman.

As for a debatable canon example, I have the need to bring up the Samurai Champloo: Sidetracked video game on PS2. In Japanese, it is entirely voiced by the same cast as the anime: Kazuya Nakai, Ayako Kawasumi and Ginpei Sato. In English, Mugen is not Steve Blum, but Fuu and Jin are the same voice actors as the anime: Kari Whelgren and Kirk Thornton.

In it, Mugen develops an attraction to a girl who looks nearly identical to Fuu: brown hair in a ponytail, big brown eyes, pink kimono, three hairpin beads. The kicker is her name is Yuu. The even bigger kicker is that she is younger than Fuu.

Here are the links to the scenes. Japanese audio is much better, as a warning.

Link to English, Fuu catches them alone and tells Jin “I had no idea Mugen was a cradle robber!”

Link to Japanese: Fuu calls Mugen a “lolicon”.

When the girl asks “Do you like me? You can lie if you want.” he tells her:

Link to Japanese: “Suki da. Uso jane.”

Link to English: “I like you. I ain’t lyin’.”

And the two share a kiss, before she dies. Worth mentioning, Fuu also admits to being jealous about all this and a fortune teller tells Fuu that this is her “heart talking.”

While debatable canon, the video game still highlights this concept that Mugen will even like a girl younger than Fuu (anywhere from 12-14), so long as she resembles Fuu.

If we pretend for a moment that Fuu is indeed a minor in her time period, then that makes Mugen’s actions and comments out to be even worse. Not only is he a pervert, but he’s then a pervert flirting and making sexual comments about a ”minor”.

Underaged Girls and Age Gaps in Other Japanese Romances

If you still believe that there is something morally wrong, regardless of the time period it takes place in, I have more modern examples in media.

Modern Japanese shoujo manga and anime (shoujo being a genre directed at teenage girls) is rife with romance stories of older guys with younger girls. It’s not frowned upon in Japan, and even for its readers in the west.

I will give you some major examples I can think of, off the top of my head.

Inuyasha: Inuyasha and Kagome. Inuyasha is over 150 years old (not counting the other 50 years he was comatose). Yes, he ages slower as a half demon, but that is still 150 years of experience in life. Kagome meanwhile, is 15 years old and does not come from the Sengoku era. She’s from the modern era. If one wants to argue that Inuyasha doesn't count because every decade for him is one year, meaning he’s supposed to be “15 in human years”, then there is the matter of Miroku. Miroku is 18 years old, and fondles not only Kagome who is 15, but Sango who is 16. And he and Sango later become a romance.

Shugo Chara: Ikuto and Amu have an age gap of 17 and 12. While there is a love triangle element, it is debatable that Ikuto is more her true love interest in the manga. This takes place in the modern era.

Dengeki Daisy: Kurosaki and Teru have an age gap of 24 and 16. This also takes place in the modern era.

Incidentally, all of these aforementioned romances share some parallels to Mugen and Fuu in some way. Whether the guy is argumentative with the girl, a homeless wanderer, antagonist by nature, teasing about her lack of a figure, a bodyguard/protector role etc.

These are just a few of the more pure Shoujo examples directed at young girls.This does not include age gaps between characters, or underaged girls in anime meant for men or adults in general. They can get far more morally questionable, in my honest opinion. Mugen and Fuu barely scratches a surface. There is clearly a cultural gap between Asia and the West and the concept of age gaps, regardless of one’s personal moral stance on the subject.

Mugen and Fuu’s Actual Age Gap and Maturity

In the Tokugawa Era, their age gap of 4 to 5 years is incredibly small. Even nowadays, that age gap is very small, if Fuu was a legal adult in modern times.

Tsuru-himegimi, the real daughter of Shogun Tsunayoshi was 8 years old when she was married to her husband Tsunanori of Kii, who was 12 years her senior.

As for the anime’s depiction of them, there was never a sense of “Fuu is child. Mugen is a man”. It always felt like the two were in a similar age bracket.

I must ask the question, if Fuu or Mugen’s ages was never revealed, would it change the context of the story at all? If Fuu was older, would it change it? Personally, I don’t think so. In this case, because she is both physically developed and also deemed a woman in the anime and historically, it changes nothing.

Their interactions, their bickering, their attitudes, and the way Mugen yells at her, and the way Fuu reprimands him, it always felt like they were similar. They both exhibited many immature, innocent qualities, as well as adult qualities. It was Jin who had a more mature demeanor, being the calm, responsible one, who would rather not intervene with their nonsense. This is another reason why I see Jin as a father figure to Fuu: a representation of the samurai who smells of sunflowers that she did not have growing up.

These images here show their similarities in behavior quite well. And there are many more examples.

Conclusion

A good, well developed character is not a perfect one. There is no denying Mugen is flawed, morally questionable and sometimes straight out an antagonist. He steals, he kills, he was an ex-pirate who likely raided and pillaged… Realistically, he would have no qualms about being attracted or developing feelings for a woman who is 4 or 5 years his junior, let alone the other crazy stuff he’s done. Especially when, in their time period, there is nothing wrong about it at all.

Regardless if his morality is in question or not, what makes the implied romance so interesting is the fact that he didn’t act upon anything sexually with Fuu. His actions towards her were selfless, and Mugen developed greatly by the end. But because of his actions and words,and jealousy, it does not come off as simply a sibling or familial relationship that the two have. This differs from how Jin and Fuu interact.

Most importantly, Fuu serves as the catalyst for Mugen’s growth and redemption of his sins. Unlike Jin, Mugen saves Fuu time and and time again, making him her hero, despite being seemingly an ex-criminal that only works in self interest. Jin did not require this change, as he was always an honorable samurai from the start.

Both men found purpose for different reasons.

Mugen needed love.

Jin needed duty.

I think that covers everything. Well, unless your question is simply why do I ship them when the characters are young and I’m older than them.

As of the time of making this post, I am a 23 years old woman. The first time I ever set eyes on the anime, I was 8 or 9 years old. As a kid, I had my first innocent, childlike suspicion of a romance between them when Mugen first went to save Fuu from the “bad place”, being the brothel in episode 4 without any reason to, while Jin didn’t. Also, he saved her in Ep 1 and 2 and Jin didn’t.

The first time I got to watch the whole anime, I was 13 and saw the full story play out. And at that point, I was more convinced. Over the years, I rewatched, looked into a lot of the history and symbolism used in the anime, analyzed the episodes, and I became more convinced. I shipped it when I was Fuu’s age of 15. I shipped it when I was Mugen’s age of 19/20. And, I will likely continue to cherish the beautiful story of Samurai Champloo and the implied subtle romance of Mugen and Fuu for years to come.

Perhaps it is a reminder of the purity and innocent nature of love for me. These two did more for each other, cared more for each other, and were more entertaining with each other than so many cliche, blatant romance stories.

#samurai champloo #fuugen #mugen and fuu #Mugen Samurai Champloo #fuu samurai champloo #shinichiro watanabe

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softlass27 · 4 years ago

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💕Robron Tag Game💕

Thanks for the tag @damnitiloveyou 😘

1.) Indicate your preference (feel free to explain)

2) There are two free questions for you to ask people you are tagging (you can ignore - no pressure). The idea would be that everyone could contribute too, and make it more interesting! Let's see if it will work haha.

3) Tag as many people as you want!

Affair era or Husbands era? Argh that’s so hard – they’re my top two! I think I’ll have to go with husbands era, because I’m a slut for that soft domestic shit. And husbands era is generally my favourite time to write fic for, so there’s that.

Floral shirt or Brown leather jacket? Neither are my favourites but I’ll go with brown leather jacket.

Purple hoodie or Overalls? Overalls 🔥🔥🔥

Wedding 1.0 or Wedding 2.0? Wedding 2.0. While there are a couple of scenes in Wedding 1.0 that I would die for (mainly the scenes that are just Robron without any other characters heh), overall I’m pretty *meh* about it. Call me a massive cynic, but I just remember watching it when it first aired and being like, “You two have... way too many communication issues to be getting married what the fuck”. Rewatching it now, after having seen them go through the inevitable breakup and more healthy reunion, I can enjoy it a bit more, for what it is and what it adds to their overall story. But at the time... yeah, I was CONCERNED lmao.

My other issue is... I mean that episode is mostly just another “Dingle Do”, innit? And that fact that it was a “Dingles only” knees up in the family pub meant that, other than Victoria and Diane, everyone in the room was just there for Aaron. They were there to celebrate Aaron getting married rather than AaronandRobert getting married, which isn’t how a wedding should be, really. Then there was all the nonsense with that sodding welly and “welcoming” Robert to the family (which as we know, counted for fuck all), the whole thing just makes me 🙄🙄🙄

Whereas with Wedding 2.0, the fact that it’s actually a properly planned event means that people other than the Dingles got to attend, and you really get the sense that the whole village are there for both Aaron and Robert equally. It was the right time for them, it looked beautiful, it felt earned, and it was nothing less than our kings deserved.

Liv or Vic? Vic. Anyone who’s perused my blog probably knows my feelings about Liv by now, so there’s no need to get into it lol.

The Sugdens or The Dingles? Sugdens. Again, I imagine anyone who knows me isn’t surprised by this answer. 😂 I love watching the Sugdens (even the ones I dislike), their family dynamic is just so interesting and often very realistic. Not to mention the fact that they’re the original legacy family of the show and deserve to be treated as such. I hate that there’s so few of them left :(

Other than Aaron (who barely counts as a Dingle – especially these days lmao), the only valid Dingles are Cain, Marlon and Charity. And even then, I enjoy those characters more when they’re either alone or with their non-Dingle family eg. Cain with Moira and their kids, Marlon with Billy and Ellis, Charity just... away from the rest of them.

The lodge or Christmas 2017? Love the lodge but it’s gotta be Christmas 2017.

Chrissie White or Rebecca White? Chrissie! The writers 100% killed the wrong sister and I hate them for it.

Reunion 1.0 or Reunion 2.0? REUNION 2.0 IS MY FAVOURITE ROBRON EPISODE OF ALL TIME

Alex or Mike? Aw, Mike. He was sweet (and had a nice accent) and I hope that the next time he went out on the pull, he found himself a nice bloke who wasn’t already pining for his soulmate. Alex was a waste of oxygen.

The Love We Stole or Make You Feel My Love? The Love We Stole. Partially based on my personal musical preference and partially because I think the lyrics just fit Robron perfectly – to the point where I almost can’t believe the song wasn’t written for them. No offence to Adele, but Make You Feel My Love is so generic that it could work for any romantic couple really. And to me, the fact that The Love We Stole was the song to play during Robron’s final scene/montage just cements its status as their song.

Lay-by or Barn? Ohh this is tough... I adore the barn but I’m gonna have to go with the lay-by!

Proposal 1.0 or Proposal 2.0? Proposal 2.0

2016 or 2018? 2018! The reunion 2.0 buildup of January/February was fantastic, and while some of the plot later that year was... lacking (thanks to inferior characters like Liv, Rebecca and Chaddy), Robron being reunited and actually in a happy, healthy relationship was everything. It felt like a reward after all the heartache they’d gone through in previous years. 2018 is also the year of Robron being parents to Seb, the three of them being a proper little family was just *chef’s kiss* (until Rebecca once again ruined things).

As for 2016... other than January/February (which I actually tend to see separately from the rest of the year, in my head those two months are more like an extension of late 2015) and SSW, it’s mostly trash in my eyes. Boyfriends era was... yeah, unless you want this to turn into an essay-like rant, I’ll stop there.

Chas or Diane? Diane all the way. Chas can just 🔪🔪🔪

Boyfriend era or affair era? Ahaha I feel like this answer is obvious after my answer to 2016 vs. 2018, but affair era. A god tier time in Robron’s story.

I shall tag @nooneelsecomesclose17, @luststricken, @dinglemingle, @saras-almanac and whoever else fancies it :)

#wow ok some of my answers got a bit rambly i apologise 😅#tag game

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bobdylanrevisited · 4 years ago

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The Basement Tapes

Released: 26 June 1975

Rating: 10/10

Following the motorcycle crash in 1966 that put an end to his ‘electric era’, Dylan and his new family moved to Woodstock, outside of the public eye. So to did his backing band, The Hawks later known as The Band, and during Bob’s recovery the musicians would meet up and record songs nearly every day for almost a year. Though recorded in 1967, there was no official release until 1975, when Bob finally gave permission to Robbie Robertson (guitarist for The Band), to select and mix tracks from these sessions. This review will be different to my others, as many of the songs do not require individual analysis, but rather I want to focus on three specific areas: the recording, Robbie’s choice of songs, and the highlights. The Basement Tapes is not only one of the best albums of the 20th century, strangely enough it’s also one of the most frustrating, due to an apathetic Bob and outside influence.

The Recording: I believe the recording sessions came about due to two very different reasons. The first is because Bob used it as his therapy. The motorcycle crash put his lifestyle into perspective and he morphed into a brand new man, as discussed in my ‘John Wesley Harding’ post. Gone were the days of acid and avant-garde, hanging out in New York’s high society art scene and facing down an audience of former fans and folk fanatics. He now chose anonymity, a simpler family life, and a return to less ‘controversial’ music. You only need to see his physical change from 1966 to ‘67 to see that this is not the same person who was booed at the Free Trade Hall. By ‘67 Bob has recorded seven albums in just five years, being laid up after the crash must have been hell for a young artist who had always stayed constantly moving.

The second reason is almost the antithesis of Bob wanting to record to stay creative and play with his friends. The crash had taken a high earning artist off the tour circuit and, as is often the way things go, some fat cat was losing revenue and wanted to recoup losses. Dylan stated in 1969 that he was being pressured into writing songs that could be sold and recorded by other popular acts, therefore still making him a valuable asset for record labels. Although it only seems like a handful of songs were actually recorded purely as demos to produce covers, and the majority of the songs do seem to be the musicians playing only for themselves, it is still a grim indictment on the industry that Bob was hounded to still produce hits after nearly dying just a few months prior.

The Band bought the now famous house ‘Big Pink’ very close to where the Dylan’s now resided, and according to Rick Danko (the bass player), Bob would constantly come round either with a new song ready to go or they’d all sit around and improvise until they’d figured out the words. This is the beauty of The Basement Tapes, it’s less about the individual songs, it’s more about the way it perfectly captures a feeling. That feeling of being with friends and having a laugh. That feeling of synchronicity you have with those closest to you. It also oozes Americana, an alluring mix of folk and country, with acoustic guitars and pianos creating lively songs about everything and nothing. Bob’s voice is relaxed and effortless, a million miles away from ‘Blonde On Blonde’. The tunes are slower and often happy, and it’s almost like the jaded beatnik of the prior three years had let all ill-will go. It’s somehow the perfect album for all seasons, whether it be a summers evening in the garden with a drink, or a winters evening wrapped up on the sofa, it’s perfectly evergreen. Despite my love for the album and the Bob we encounter on this record, there is an unavoidable problem with this release, and that problem is Robbie Robertson.

The Tracklist: Following ‘Blood On The Tracks’ and his critical standing seemingly returned to his mid ‘60s high point, Bob finally gave permission for the long bootlegged basement recordings to be made public. However, he wasn’t really interested in how these recordings were released, so Robbie Robertson took the task upon himself. This leads to the biggest problem with the album and the legacy of the recordings: the songs that were left off, and the songs Robbie faked to replace them.

Many classics were written and recorded during the legendary sessions. ‘Quinn The Mighty Eskimo’ had been a huge hit for Manfred Mann and had been performed live by Bob. Similarly, ‘Minstrel Boy’ had been part of his Isle Of Wight set in 1969. ‘I Shall Be Released’ had also been a staple of live shows, as well as appearing on Bob’s Greatest Hits Volume 2 in 1971 (albeit a different and better studio recording). So why the fuck were these omitted from official release?! Who could possibly hear the pure genius of ‘I’m Not There’ or ‘Sign On The Cross’ and decide the public didn’t deserve to fall in love with its weird and mysterious ramblings. Of course with The Bootleg Series Vol. 11: The Complete Basement Tapes eventually being released in 2014, everyone finally got to hear a properly mixed catalogue of these amazing months of musical perfection, yet it may have been 39 years too late thanks to Robbie’s bizarre song choice.

Of the 24 tracks on the album, 8 do not feature Dylan nor were recorded during the basement period. These are unreleased The Band songs which Robbie added to the album. Now, I want to make it clear that after Bob, The Band are my favourite musical artists, but there is something very disingenuous of Robbie to pretend that these songs were anything to do with Bob and the mythos of his reclusive year. Their studio recordings were even mixed to sound more raw, to match the rest of the album. It’s honestly mind blowing that a third of the album is taken up with these tracks, when the aforementioned classics were saved just for bootleggers and collectors. Whilst I still adore the album, Robbie’s ego and self promotion leaves a bitter taste.

The Highlights: As previously mentioned, the songs themselves are often short and simple, and they don’t require lyrical analysis. However, there are 3 tracks I did quickly want to mention.

12. Tears Of Rage - One of the darker songs on this otherwise happy album, Dylan’s singing here is incredible, as are his harmonies with The Band’s Richard Manuel. It’s one of my favourites on the album.

19. You Ain’t Goin’ Nowhere - A happy song of love and unity (remember this was recorded during Bob and Sara’s happy days despite being eventually released during their break up). The recording on this album is great, however I urge you to listen to the 1971 studio version found on Greatest Hits Vol. 2 as it’s one of my favourite Dylan songs from the Woodstock period.

24. This Wheel’s On Fire - Similar to ‘Tears Of Rage’, this is dark, weird, and infinitely more memorable than most of the album. By far the best track, Dylan was still at his songwriting best when tackling metaphor and challenging imagery.

Verdict: As I previously said, this album is a cultural document of legendary artists essentially messing about. It’s a truly fantastic record, in spite of Robertson’s best efforts, and each song from the basement sessions makes you wish you could have been there, chilling amongst mates and being ludicrously creative every single day. However, this album is only a great introduction to these mesmerising recordings, it is essential you listen to The Bootleg Series Vol. 11: The Complete Basement Tapes. It is a joy to listen to the 138 tracks and find your new favourite, or find a hidden gem that Dylan likely forgot the second he stopped singing it. That being said, if you don’t want to sift through that many tracks, many of which are admittedly nonsense or badly recorded, then the 24 track album is still a brilliant overview which you’re sure to fall in love with. Following this release, we go back to Bob during his tumultuous marriage breakdown, his carnival live shows, and an album filled with mystique and violins.

#bob dylan #the basement tapes

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littlequeenies · 5 years ago

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BEBE BUELL: MUSING ON MUSES AND OTHER FANS

📷BEBE BUELLJUNE 17, 2020

Before embarking on a musical career of her own, Bebe Buell was a much in-demand model but was most often seen as the second fiddle to the famous rock musicians she was dating. She, however, saw herself as the Muse to these musicians, inspiring and sharing ideas with them. Inevitably, the term “groupie” would arise. As she says, “I’m not opposed to ‘groupies,’ per se. I just don’t like being called a name or being tagged like a sheep to slaughter’. Bebe elaborates on this idea for PKM.

I remember the first time I saw a photograph of Oscar Wilde. I was five and it was Easter. We were at the Virginia Beach home of my mother’s friends, Poppy and Tilly, who were hosting a Sunday get together. We were dressed in our pastels and frills and the candy and food was flowing. It was an adult affair and, being the only child there, I wandered off to explore while the grown-ups enjoyed their martinis and snacks. I found myself in a living room study area and on the table was a big book filled with photos of poets, painters, sculptors and scholars. I was immediately drawn to an image of Oscar draped on a chair like a velvet throw! It stuck with me and when I got older I looked him up in the school library. At the age of twelve I read The Picture Of Dorian Gray, but my main interest was in Oscar Wilde, the man and his story. I felt an instant connection, just as I have with all the great inspirations in my life. In 1978, when I was living between NYC, Maine and LA, before finishing the year in London, I never missed one episode of Masterpiece Theatre and their 13 episodes of Lillie about the life of Lillie Langtry, played brilliantly by Francesca Annis. To my delight, it explored in great depth the relationship/friendship between Oscar and Lillie, and I became obsessed with knowing everything and anything I could about their dynamic. I was intrigued, too, by the descriptions of Mrs. Langtry in the press at that time in England and the U.S. She was often called a “Professional Beauty” or “The Jersey Lily” because she was born on Jersey, the largest of the Channel Islands off the coast of Normandy. She was also one of the most featured women in advertising; her face was everywhere. She was the image for Pears Soap and the most respected painters of the day stood in line just to have a sitting with her. In 1877, she met Edward, Prince of Wales, later King Edward VII, and became his first publicly acknowledged mistress.

One of my favorite quotes was attributed to her from her conversations with Wilde: “They saw me, those reckless seekers of beauty, and in a night I was famous.” This reminded me of the back room at Max’s Kansas City, the temple of cool when I arrived in New York during the era of everything! It was this platonic duo that introduced me to the role of the “Muse”—that is the Artist and the Muse. Throughout history and especially in the arts, there seems to always be a driving force that brings the flora. In the series Lillie, they emphasized how Oscar would repeat Lillie’s quips and observations in his writing. Their banter with one another fascinated me and I often envisioned myself as a “Patron of The Arts”, in a sense, as I’ve always promoted and sang the praises of those whose work I liked. I felt an affinity with that spirit—the gift of inspiring and sharing special ideas with an artist I admired. It wasn’t just music. I adored musing with photographers, writers, film directors and designers, too. Creative energies have always fed my soul. The first time I referenced the term “muse” was in a 1981 interview I did with the Emmy-winning writer Stephen Demorest for the edgy publication Oui. Its sister magazine in France was called Lui. Playboy had taken over ownership of Oui so it was a glossy, classy, European-style men’s delight, targeting a younger demographic. When Stephen approached me about the piece, he showed me a couple other interviews with “It Girls” that had been published.

One was with Patti D’Arbanville, the inspiration for some of Cat Stevens’ biggest hits. He even used her last name in one of the songs, “Lady D’Arbanville”. I knew Patti from the early 70s and, in fact, it was she who introduced me to Jimmy Page in 1973 on a night out dancing with her in NYC. It was a quick meeting, as I was eager to get home to my boyfriend at the time, Todd Rundgren. A year later, I would run into Mr. Page again and the rest is the stuff of rock tales.

I adored Patti so knowing that both she and Jerry Hall had done this particular interview sealed the deal. Like Patti Boyd, Jane Asher, Linda Eastman, Maureen Van Zandt, Sara Dylan, to name a few, the musical muse is the most often of the muses referenced. I recall how so many people wanted to know my viewpoints and opinions about the word “muse” and why I preferred it to the term “groupie”.

Even in Cameron Crowe’s Almost Famous, his beloved character Penny Lane’s first words on screen are, “We are not groupies. We inspire the music- we are bandaids!”. The film was Cameron’s love letter to women and how even at that time a stigma was attached to calling a woman a groupie; it was not necessarily a compliment. It was almost like a dismissive jab, on par with “she’s such a slut” or “whore”. Another scene in Almost Famous has all of the members of the fictitious band Stillwater squeezed onto a small plane that, they thought, was about to crash. Secrets were spilled and fingers were pointed. In one of the most moving moments, the William character defends Penny when she is described as “that groupie” by one of the band members. William nails it when he points out who and “what” she really is- a bright light and cherished fan. Someone who loved them all and for all the right reasons.

I feel that women have been unfairly branded and labeled without cause. I’ve often said that I’m not opposed to “groupies,” per se. I just don’t like being called a name or being tagged like a sheep to slaughter. Summing me up for the life I’ve lived, seen through someone else’s eyes or, worse, exaggerating the truth. I didn’t want those I’ve truly loved or the relationships I’ve had to be considered less sincere because of the visibility of my partner.

Certainly loving music or dating musicians is not derogatory. Isn’t it logical, then, that birds of a feather flock together? Like-minded tribes mate or unite because of chemistry? Rock boys and models have been drawn to each other since forever! In the Netflix series Hollywood, you find that sex and sexual favors were the core of the industry. Several of the movie stars everyone loved on screen had started out as rent boys or nude models to make ends meet. Who decides why someone can give a blow job to the “right” person and get a starring role in a movie and another blow job by an aspiring talent gets tossed into the trash can of regret.

Why, after having four children with Mick Jagger, a successful modeling career and now being Mrs. Rupert Murdoch, would anyone refer to Jerry Hall as a groupie? Or gold digger, another favorite term used to describe women who marry well. Or Marianne Faithfull, Anita Pallenberg or Winona Ryder, for heaven’s sake? These are the questions I’ve always had and one of the main reason why I have rejected the term groupie in the press. It’s not a personal attack on those who identify with the moniker. It’s my own rebellion against being labeled and frowned on for the relationships I’ve had.

I’ve taken this stand for a long time, even though it’s also caused some judgement and negativity towards me from other women. It’s almost as if they think I see myself as better than them. Or that I’m not being honest when I don’t just call myself a full-on groupie, and own it. My closest friends tell me it’s just jealousy but that doesn’t make it any less hurtful to have tales and lies circulated about you by people you barely know or those who don’t know me at all. Or to have relationships that lasted for years being reduced to a laundry list of “conquests.”

This is nothing new, of course. Catherine The Great‘s enemies within the Emperor’s Court turned on her and started rumors that she was a sex fiend who had intercourse with horses. That stuck with her throughout her life and even in the museums of Russia, the tale has echoed although it’s completely untrue. Cleopatra and Anne Boleyn were also targeted. Ruining reputations was the way people got their revenge in days of yore. Or in some cases, the reason why some lost their heads to the guillotine. Why is it that women who have power or beauty have been subjected to crazy accusations of sexual voracity or deviance? Eve takes the blame for the banishment from Eden and although she was supposedly created from Adam’s rib, she is seen as a temptress and Adam as her victim.

I believe every woman should identify by how she feels comfortable and for the work she does. I personally prefer to be known for what I do, my accomplishments, my career. However, dating a rock star or an actor should not merit a nasty quip or name calling fest. It becomes unbalanced when just because someone gets famous as, say, a model or an actress and then dates a rock star, that she should get called anything other than what she does to earn a living. I’m not sure “groupie” falls under the umbrella of job occupation. I’d file it under pastime, hobby, passion, or fetish.

The origins of the groupie started with nothing more than a desire to be close to the band—the guys who made the music. Or in some cases, the women. The term came into use in the mid-1960s as slang for women who liked to hang out with musicians. It’s fair to say that not all “groupies” are the same. There are many tiers and pecking orders when narrowing it down. Certainly not every girl who dreams of being with a rock star will waltz backstage and demand sex or give oral gratification. That’s the image I despise and wish would not tarnish the entire viewpoint to the outside world. Some of the girls on the scene want to take the word “groupie” back, to personify what it meant in the ‘60s and early ‘70s. It became something entirely different when the ‘80s rolled around. Bands born out of the LA scene liked a different kind of arm candy than the Rolling Stones or the Beatles. They preferred exotic dancers and porn stars, the girls du jour of the time. Just as music changes with each era, so do the kinds of women who pursue the bands. But, more importantly, what kind of women the bands seek out. One man’s status is another man’s yen.

And then there are those who look at being a groupie as a form of prostitution. I’ve never understood that one because most girls who live that lifestyle don’t charge money to be with their favorite rock god or even their crew. It’s a thrill to be with the band, but it seems the glamor that was once attached to that goal has changed. For me, it was a thrill to fight to say “I’m IN the band”… or even “I AM the band!”

When I was living with Todd, he produced one of the first all-female bands, Fanny. They were so great! June Millington could shred! I felt bewildered when I would hear snide remarks wondering if Todd was sleeping with one of them. I thought to myself that would have never been said or thought if they weren’t women.

The bottom line is preference. We all have a choice. And we all can be whatever we want. We can wear many hats. I see myself as a mother, wife, musician, singer, songwriter, writer, mentor, animal lover… many different things. What I do in my spare time is how I make my soul happy. Who I date is based on connections, fate and karma. We end up with who we’re meant to be with and the experiences we have are all meant to be. I’ve been with my husband Jim for twenty years now. Our 18th wedding anniversary is coming in August 2020. So, I’m writing this piece from the perspective of a wife, mother, working musician, writer and mentor. Not just a girl who had lots of suitors in her youth. Every single little thing is part of the journey.

The first time I saw a photo in Rolling Stone of what they called a “groupie”, I was 15 years old and in the 10th grade. It was 1969, and neither the image nor the word was at all something ugly to me. It just seemed exciting and cool. The girls were so outrageously dressed, and it reflected an almost innocent charm. I didn’t aspire to be a groupie but they seemed like they were the ones who made the guys in the band cool. They helped dress them, created make-up looks and spread the word all over town about how good they were. It didn’t seem to be so much about sex and backstage antics. Maybe I was too young to fully understand everything, especially from the pages of a magazine.

On my first trip to LA with Todd in 1973, when I finally did meet some real girls who liked to be called groupies, it still didn’t seem derogatory. I started to see how it was all just tossed together in some people’s minds. It’s a complex dance between an artist and his muse. None of it is something so vulgar or tainted as being only about sexual conquest. Maybe to some, it’s about that. But for me it was a series of fated encounters that have lasted throughout my life.

Some people see a groupie as a girl who will do anything, including have sex with a roadie, to get to the band. There is that element to the rock n’ roll lifestyle. But it’s not the entire package. Others see groupies as a vibe, the girls who are there when the band makes it, the girls that helped them make it, the on-the-road bestie, or the girls who get the bands drugs and food. Or even give them the clothes off their backs if the band is short a cool stage look. I often joke that that’s how wearing your lingerie out became a signature rock girl look- the band had taken her clothes to wear onstage!

I recall reading where Pamela Des Barres said she was still a virgin when she first discovered her teenage heart being drawn to rock boys. It felt sexual to her and it was also just youthful and sweet. Not a salacious sexual quest. More a desire to be near the music and the men who made it. That’s perhaps what one would define as a “classic groupie”. Or, in some circles, “fan” is the preferred analogy. I can relate to that myself as I knew when I was ten years old, I would hang out with Mick Jagger one day. I knew those were my people… my kind.

Pamela has made a career out of her life as a proud groupie. But certainly she has a right to claim the term because she helped invent it! She now calls it her “groupie heart” and that is something anyone who’s ever had a crush on someone or loved someone’s music so much that it altered your DNA can relate to. Hasn’t everyone felt that way? Every guy or gal who picks up a guitar or slings a mic stand had to have been dazzled by their inspiration or felt a need to pursue that for their own futures. So, my point is this- none of it is negative nor should one word hold so much power that when it’s flung at a woman, she’ll feel shamed or scorned.

When I started to get a bit of fame, the media seemed to want to call me anything but “groupie”. It was “Friend Of The Stars”, “Queen Of The Rock Chicks”, “Leggy Model”, “The Mother Of All Rock Chicks”, “It Girl”… so when the internet entered our lives, I began to see just how judgmental and downright mean people were about the women who hung out with the bands. It started to become something so dirty and taboo that I wanted no part of that term. It’s a thin line, a hard one to walk. Personally, I feel loving music and being attracted to musicians is as natural as doctors and nurses getting along. Humans are drawn to their soul tribe. Music, musicians and all art forms attract me. I’m the moth to that flame.

As an entertainer myself, it always hurt me when what I actually do for my job was ignored or not taken seriously because of the famous names I’ve been attached to. It’s so one-sided to only put that burden on women. It has been the norm for men to be patted on the back and admired for their taste in women and especially if they were able to appeal to many and have tons of sexual experiences. Even in the animal kingdom, the male peacock has the massive plume bloom to attract as many lovers as he can. A male lion can rule the pride with his sexual domination. A male celebrity only becomes more famous if he’s got a beautiful model or actress on his arm. Whereas a woman who’s dance card is busy or even full is often ridiculed or bashed. Branded with the scarlet letter of infamy.

It started to get under my skin when I saw myself defined only by who I’d dated or had close friendships with. It’s the luck of the draw. Some women who are in the public eye can date and marry a celeb several times and be embraced for it. They use it to further their already visible life. They are proud and exploit all their lovers as the playthings that they’ve become. Some have become famous by leaking a porno or being on a reality show. What was once a limited field has become wide open with lots of branches of thought and assumption. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy for me to fight for my image… my persona… my legacy. But I did fight. I turned down almost every request I was presented to be interviewed for groupie documentaries or sensationalized TV shows. Sometimes turning down large sums of money. But I wanted to work hard and felt if I worked hard enough one day I’d be thought of for what I did on a stage, in front of the lens of a camera, as a mother and at times even a manager, more than who I shared my life with. Dare I use the “R” word? I wanted RESPECT.

There’s lots of contrast in the definition of groupie or muse but what about “partners”… the duos who took the world by storm. Sonny & Cher, Karen & Richard Carpenter, Debbie Harry & Chris Stein, Jack & Meg White, Jane Birkin & Serge Gainsbourg, Stevie Nicks & Lindsey Buckingham, Annie Lennox & Dave Stewart, Kim Gordon & Thurston Moore, etc… Or Chrissie Hynde and Courtney Love, who both married musicians. There’s a kaleidoscope of ways women are seen. It all depends on how you are first perceived. The general public seem to hold on to how they first heard of you even if you go on to do many different things in your life. Marianne Faithfull is a perfect example of someone who has been able to transcend her detractors and carry on like the warrior she is. But it baffles my mind how anyone could call her or Anita Pallenberg anything but tastemakers and trendsetters. They were the women I would stare at for hours as a young girl. They fascinated me almost more than the guys they hung out with. Yet I still hear them sometimes referred to as groupies.

Like any entertainer, I have an overwhelming need to be loved and to give love and positive energy to others. That’s why I crave being onstage. The connection with the audience is almost like having the best sex in the world. Or at minimum, a great, soulful hug that sends sparks through your body. I’ve been doing this since 1980, in public anyway. This is my life… not the talented, special men I dated in my youth. That’s part of my story and I will never regret a single heartbreak nor will I ever regret loving to the point of forgetting myself and my own pursuits. But I want to be remembered for more than my dates or suitors. I gave birth to a child who grew up to become a superstar so the role of nurturer has followed me throughout my life. I’ve accepted the fact that my fate is to be a vessel for talent and to enrich those who possess it. It’s become who I am- all the parts and pieces of my karma rolled into one big bang! My artistic side occupies just as much space as my musing side- equal parts love and creative energy.

Things come full circle especially when I get approached after one of my shows by young girls that call me “High Priestress” or tell me that they are my “groupies”. When I hear the words “Bebe, Im your biggest groupie!”, my heart swells but I also like to immediately remind them that I do what I do onstage because of them. Because of the exchange being a performer gives to my being. It’s like fuel… hors d’oeuvres for the soul.

One morning in 2009, I got a call from an old industry friend who had landed at Interscope Records. I was awoken with, “Bebe, you’ve been touted in a song produced by Pharrell Williams called ‘Bebe Buell’ by a young band from Boston called Chester French.” I remember thinking “wow, that’s a nice compliment” because the gist of the song was that someone like me or Pamela Anderson Lee were the creme de la creme of rock-boy desire. There’s a clothing line called ‘Muse & Lyrics‘ that has a blouse/top called “The Bebe” and the brand ‘I’m With The Band’ has named their leopard scarfs and headbands the “Bebe”. There’s even a cocktail called “The Bebe Buell”.

But I think one of the coolest things was having Cameron Crowe name the lead singer in Stillwater Jeff Bebe. He gave me the original T-shirt that was used in the movie, too, and boy do I treasure it! Cameron sprinkled all kinds of little clues and messages throughout Almost Famous. I was especially touched by the Jeff Bebe nod because he knew how much I wanted to be a singer in a band. I remember him once saying to me that I should just go for it. At that point, people only knew me as a model and Todd Rundgren’s girlfriend. I hadn’t even done Playboy yet, so I was still trying to figure out who I was and how to do it. I finally did but it took me six more years to get in the studio and front a band!

It’s moving to be honored and it’s also nice to be appreciated by the younger generation of pop culture lovers. The first time my name was in a song, I was excited by it. My old friend G.E. Smith had a line on his solo album that was about coming to visit “Bebe and Liz”… he came over to my best friend Liz Derringer’s house to play it for us. We were elated… it was cool. I would never be so bold as to sit here and make a list of my lovers or the songs they wrote for me because it seems so long ago. I’d rather leave that up to the fans of the music to decipher and besides not all songs written for others are acknowledged as such. I’ve had several songs given to me as gifts or written to me in letters.

Sometimes the authors don’t admit it because their feelings change and they don’t want to upset their new love interest. Didn’t Bob Dylan write “Leopard Skin Pill Box Hat”, “Just Like A Woman”, “Fourth Time Around” and “Like A Rolling Stone” about Edie Sedgwick, only to later deny it? I know the feeling because it’s happened to me. So, at this point in my life, I just cherish the letters (yes, I still have them so one day when we’re all gone they will maybe solve the puzzles) and I respect and allow artistic license to have its day. It’s an artist’s prerogative to change their minds so I hold no hurt feelings. Music buffs are pretty smart anyway and they usually know the truth, so it matters little unless it’s blatant. The one topic that irks me is that I claimed This Year’s Model was about me. Well, that’s impossible because I didn’t meet and start to date Elvis Costello until he was well into Armed Forces. I was living with him in London when he recorded it in the fall of 1978. He included a couple of lyrics from songs on Armed Forces in letters to me but I can say with certainty that “Party Girl” wasn’t one of them. I guess it was the timing of the release that made people speculate I was the subject, but I wasn’t and never claimed to be. He didn’t even know me when he wrote those records. Why this is disputed has always been a mystery to me. The songs Mr. Costello sent me in letters were from later albums, starting with Get Happy. I will always wonder too why he would say something so false and perpetuate a rumor twenty years later in the liner notes of a re-issue. Here’s to hoping it is finally put to rest. And even with the shame and pain I felt at the time, I feel no regret or ill will toward anyone. To me the truth is pretty obvious. Remember the story I told earlier about Catherine The Great? Revenge is often used when hearts are hurt, and it is very common in the entertainment industry.

In summing up my thoughts on the topic, I feel it’s time in our culture to appreciate the roles women have played in art since the beginning of time. Dali had his Gala, Picasso would hide the initials of his mistresses in his paintings and secretly tell them so they would know it was for them, Clapton immortalized his love and lust for Patti Boyd with the ultimate ode in “Layla” and John Lennon may have written the most beautiful love song of all for Yoko in “Woman”. Or was it Paul McCartney with “The Long And Winding Road” about Jane Asher or “Maybe I’m Amazed” about the spectacular Linda Eastman McCartney?

We can’t leave out the spirited and unique George Sand whose given name was Aurore Dupin. She was born in Paris on July 1, 1804 and adopted the name “George” because women couldn’t write professionally with the freedom of men in those days. She became one of the most popular writers in Europe during her lifetime- one of the most notable writers of the European Romantic era. She would wear male attire in public saying it was easier and more affordable than women’s garb. She was a confidant to Franz Liszt and lover and muse to Chopin. She would lie beneath the piano while Chopin composed, saying it sent the music through her entire body instead of just her ears.

Music is primal and it gets into our bloodstream. It’s easy to see why young girls get crushes on their idols and some even grow up to marry their dream man. But the days of defining women by their sexual desires or “conquests” should be on the wane. I never looked at the men I dated or loved as conquests. Humans aren’t territories to be battled over or ceded to. The human connection is divine. Each and every person we cross paths with is part of our magical life story. So, whatever you identify yourself as is fine. That is your privilege and judgement should not follow even if the choices aren’t the norm. As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself. Everyone else is taken.”

*Closing side note* As I was finishing this essay, I was doodling with a People magazine crossword puzzle and one of the clues was “GROUPIE”. Guess what the answer was… “FAN”. The timing was uncanny!

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

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Survey #304

“she’s got a hold on me / maybe she is just what they want me to be”

How many foreign friends do you have? Only one that I know of that actually immigrated into America in their life. I think. In which countries do they live? She was born in Asia, either China or Japan. What was your dream birthday party as a kid? I either wanted to go to the skating rink or Chuck E. Cheese. Have you ever come up with your own game? As a kid, definitely. Whose hand did you hold last? Probably my niece's or nephew's if they were taking me somewhere. What was the last thing you planted? Habaneros, I think. Do you have a green thumb or are you all thumbs with plants? I don't really try with plants because I'm not interested in the maintenance. What or who was the last thing you gossiped about? Does telling your therapist about another person and what they do to stress you out count? lol Any books on your night stand? Wings of Fire: The Brightest Night. Would you ever consider going vegetarian? I was briefly one, but I had to introduce meat back into my diet because I just hate too many foods needed to keep me healthy without meat. I would love love LOVE to go vegan, but I just can't. When's the last time you helped a senior citizen somehow? Probably holding open a door for someone in a wheelchair. What's the most selfless act you have done? I don't know... Maybe letting my mother use all my Christmas and birthday money (which was a lot) to take care of bills to keep us from being evicted and losing the car. She was going to pay me back, but then cancer happened. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? No. What makes you feel lucky? The fact I have a roof over my head, food on the table, access to water... That kind of stuff. Never take it for granted. How many Lidls are there in your town? One. Last time you went to Ikea, what did you buy? I don't believe we've ever bought anything from there? But I wouldn't really know. How do you like your favorite beverage? Really cold in a can, heeeeell yeah. What's your big family secret? We don't really have one. What did you think you were good at, until you saw someone else do it? I remember thinking I was the "gifted" artist in school until I met my acquaintance Cailin in the 5th grade, lol. She is SO talented. What is something nice going on in your life right now? My partial hospitalization program is going well. I'm getting more comfortable with talking via things like Zoom, it's a good opportunity for me to socialize with like-minded people almost every day, and I ADORE one of the teachers so much so that I want him to be my normal therapist. I have never in the entirety of my life felt less judged and more cared for from any therapist before him, and it's almost supernatural how easily this man reads people. You could twitch a certain way and he picks it up. I'm ready for him to teach more of the sessions. What was the pinnacle of wealth to you as a child? The idea of owning one of those toy crane machines, haha. If I saw one in a store, I would like beeeeg for it. I remember I cried once when I came across one I adored, it was just too expensive, lol. I did eventually get a little one, I think. What's something that you hate, but can't live without? My meds. What skill do you not talk about, because you feel it sounds like bragging? I don't really brag about anything I think I'm good at because I feel bad about it and don't wanna emit a "better than you" vibe. Who's the worst person you've encountered on the Internet? Ahhh, a lovely "friend" nicknamed Shakes. God she hated me. If death wasn't a consequence, what would you try? Probably ride a motorcycle. I'm too scared to risk the possibility of crashing, and those wrecks are nasty. What's the dumbest thing you've heard someone say? There's this one video of a TV show host thinking the moon was a planet and it was just- What is the worst smell you can remember? This smell was forever branded into my memory as if it was fuckin trauma. When my late dog Teddy had a massive, infected cyst near his ~you know~ and also wore diapers because of incontinence with his age (also keep in mind he had a UTI we couldn't afford to fix, and that smells bad enough), changing the diaper he would wear overnight could, swear to God, be enough to make you puke. It literally came to a point that I personally could no longer do it. It sounds so so bad and selfish, and it probably is, but Mom had to do it before she left and came home from work; she's way less fazed by stuff like that than me. Yes, when we had the money, we got the cyst removed. What song gets better the louder it gets? Only like, every song I enjoy. The louder the better until it becomes obnoxious to others. What's the biggest inconvenience that does NOT ruin your day? Having to pee at like an unnatural frequency? haha What's something everybody should know how to do? Cook... which I don't know how to do. What is a great movie no one knows about? I'unno. I don't really know the success level of most movies unless you see stuff about it everywhere. What type of person could the world use less of? Rapists, pedophiles, monsters like that. What makes you tingle? I have this odd reaction to rubbing my hand while someone is holding it???? idk why????? What’s the best Wi-Fi name you’ve seen? Oh MAN, I wish I could remember 'em all. I've seen some goodies. What's easy to learn, but hard to master? God, it's pathetic that my immediate response is related to a video game, haha. Then again it's such a common idea that it's basically a meme in the World of Warcraft community. So, playing hunters in the game. They're argued to be one of the - if not the - easiest classes in the game that requires little to no skill, while as a hunter main, I disagree with the second part firmly. I don't know about the other specializations because I don't play them, but at least in beast mastery, it takes focus and thinking ahead to master your rotation for optimal damage and just to generally be a skilled player of the class. Not to mention you need to watch your pet(s), too. What's something you've changed your opinion on? Wow, LOTS. Tons of political ideas, like my stance on gay rights, transgender folks, etc... If you had a refilling bowl, what would you want it to contain? For some reason my mind immediately jumped to fresh strawberries. I'm picky with the firmness of fruit, so I won't eat them if they're older because ew. If your bedroom had three portals to anywhere, where would they lead? I mean this in the least creepy way possible, but Sara's house so we could actually hang out, Dad's house so I could see him more, and then uhhh South Africa to regularly see meerkitties. You can ask any author one question about their story. What do you ask? Oh, I dunno. I've got some for writers of other media, but I guess by "author," you mean this is for books exclusively. If you have caffeine late in the day, does it cause you to struggle with your sleep? Shit, I wouldn't even know because I essentially always have caffeine in my system. I don't believe it affects me. When you struggle to sleep, what do you do instead? Keep trying to sleep, or more common than not, I do exactly what you shouldn't do and get back on the laptop for a while. Who was the last person you spoke to for the first time? How did you come to speak to this person? My most recent therapist in the PHP. I love love love him. The therapists rotate the days they teach, and he was the last one I met. Are there any TV shows from your childhood that you still watch today? I'm not opposed to it if I actually watched television. Do you enjoy buying gifts for other people, or do you never know what to buy them? If I actually have the money to, omg yes. I honestly do think I create or buy very thoughtful gifts, and I just really enjoy reminding other people that I love and think about them. Who were you with the last time you went out for a meal? My sisters, Mom, and I went to the Cheesecake Factory for my birthday dinner. That place has come to oust Olive Garden as my favorite restaurant, haha. What’s the last thing you watched on TV? Is this a programme you watch regularly? I believe it was this amateur cooking show called Nailed It!, I think it was, with my mom when I sat in the living room with her for dinner one night. Do you have a favorite documentary subject (eg. nature, celebrities, history, crime)? Absolutely animals. Does having to wear a mask stop you from doing anything, just because you dislike them or find them uncomfortable? Do not fucking talk to me if you're anti-mask. If I set foot in public, I'm wearing a mask like a goddamn considerate human being. Do you prefer zip-up or overhead hoodies? Overhead. I really dislike the appearance of zippers on them. If you have a yard or garden, how much time do you spend out there? N/A When was the last time someone bought you flowers? What was the occasion? I think it was the first time Tyler came to my house. This was quite a few years ago. When was the last time you stayed overnight away from home? Was this with friends, family or in a hotel somewhere? What was the occasion? Hell, I'm pretty sure I haven't slept over anywhere since the last time I was visiting Sara, which was like, two years ago. What’s your favorite period to learn about in history? What got you interested in this particular era? The Renaissance; I always found it to be an attractive subject, art being in its "glory days" and all. My Art History course in college really hooked me in. What is the smallest thing you lose your temper over instantly? Homophobic bullshit. What's a job that doesn't get enough respect? As others have said before me, teachers might just top the list. The shit they gotta put up with for so little pay... What did you take for granted until you visited another country? I've never left America, so I wouldn't know. Who is your favorite scientist and why? I don't have a favorite; I don't know nearly enough about any. Do you prefer emoticons or emoji? I'm from the emoticons era, so I'm biased, haha. How did you meet your pet? Roman was the kitten of one of my sister's mother-in-law's females. They have quite a cat problem and wanted to adopt the kittens out, and Mom knew I desperately wanted a cat, so there we go. One day when we were over there, she showed me the kittens, and Roman caught my eye instantly with his beautiful blue eyes. Venus, I "met" via the Morph Market, a reptile hub website for selling, as the name implies, reptiles that are generally morphs of their species. I was clicking through the genes, keeping my price ceiling in mind, and really fell in love with champagnes, and I thought Venus in specific was just absolutely beautiful. I officially met her as a little thing mailed to me, and she was and still is just the sweetest. I wanna point out that when I chose Venus, I hadn't the slightest idea that champagnes harbored "the spider gene," as otherwise I would have avoided adopting her and feeding the market. Regardless, I love her to death and wouldn't trade her out. Did/Do you have any PEZ dispensers? I did as a kiddo, yeah. Do you enjoy erotic stories? If so, do you read them or write them? No; they make me really uncomfortable. When writing RP, some scenes can get sexual, but I have my limits for sure and know when to stop writing and just time-skip. If you had to choose, which one would you rather have: a pet or a baby? Keep the baby away from me. Gimme a plains hognose or tarantula, please. ^Why did you choose the one you chose? I don't want kids at all but would love the mentioned animals as pets. Do you live with your parents or on your own/with a partner? I live with my mother. What's the car of your dreams? I don't have a "dream car." Have you ever witnessed something or someone die? Animals, yes. Has anyone ever told you that you snore or talk in your sleep? I don't snore, but I talk a LOT. Do you have any houseplants? No. Are you more on a laptop or a desktop computer? I only have a laptop, and I prefer them for portability's sake. If you could do absolutely anything, what would you like to do the most? Entirely leave behind my anxiety, probably. Or PTSD. Do you think your parents raised you well? Yeah. Dad didn't really take much part in "raising" us/enforcing rules and stuff, but hey, my sisters and I wound up being good people. Do you have a Facebook? Yeah. Do you know any of your neighbors? Definitely not well. We haven't lived here long at all. Does/did any of your relatives have an interesting, nowadays unusual job? I'm sure somebody does. Have you met your ideal partner yet? I think so. Have you had a serious relationship yet? If so, how many? Yeah, two. Do you enjoy books, magazines or comic books the most? Books. Are your parents old-fashioned or up-to-date about certain things? Dad is more old-fashioned I think, while Mom is pretty up-to-date. Do you or did you at some point keep a diary? I very briefly did on a few occasions. I always had a journal I wrote in during all my hospital stays. Have you ever upcycled trash into useful items? I remember I once followed this craft idea on Animal Planet where you turn a milk jug into a bird house. We never got any birds in it, though. Which color Skittle do you like best? The only right answer is red. What’s your favorite element? Of the classic four, fire. If you had your own radio show, what would it be like? YIKES, I don't want one. Don't make me talk in front of (through a radio or not) people. What has been the biggest surprise you’ve ever gotten? An "impossible" breakup over Facebook Messenger lmaoooo. Is there a holiday you can’t stand at all? There aren't any that I "can't stand," but I do hold at least some degree of dislike of ones bastardized by religion. It's disrespectful as fuck. Who is your favorite person in the whole world? My mom. Has there ever been an activity you became obsessed with? I was definitely obsessed with RPing in my early teens. Like, I ALWAYS wanted to be writing it. What has been the strangest place you ran into someone from your past? I can't think of an occurance. What is something people tend to come to you about? Anything related to English and grammar. If applicable, what's the furthest you've traveled because of a hobby? For purely a hobby, definitely not very far, partially because I can't drive or afford travelling via plane or whatever. Do you have souvenirs from other countries? If so, what and from where? N/A What do you do when someone is talking to you about something you don't care about? Pretend to be interested to avoid being rude. Do you have Photoshop installed on your computer? Yeah. Do you put lotion on after you get out of the shower? No, but I need to. Has anyone ever given you a promise ring? No. Do you have any bruises on you? Yeah, on my shin. When getting in Ash's van the other day, I hit it against the thing that helps you step up into the vehicle. Because of my muscle atrophy, I, and I am not kidding, can barely manage to absolutely yank myself up there. And mind you, her van isn't even very high up at all. My legs are just that damn weak. Any changes in appearance lately? Gaining weight is fucking lovely. Who was the last person to call you babe or baby? Probably a gal friend commenting on a selfie or something on Facebook. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Sometimes. Do you actually care about other's problems? Probably too much for my own good. Have you ever gotten a teddy bear from someone? Besides my mom, I don't think so.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''big bad wolf'' by in this moment

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booksandwords · 5 years ago

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Meet Cute: Some People Are Destined to Meet (Anthology)

Read time: 10 Day Rating: 4/5

Contains stories by Katie Cotuguo, Nina LaCour, Ibi Zoboi, Katherine McGee, Sara Shepard, Meredith Russo, Dhonielle Clayton, Emery Lord, Jennifer L. Armentrout, Jocelyn Davies, Kass Morgan, Julie Murphy, Huntley Fitzpatrick and Nicola Yoon

Overall Thoughts So I will start by saying I enjoyed this collection. There is a bit of something for everyone the couples are M/M, M/F and F/F, one of the main characters is trans. There are different time settings, different writing styles and the meet-cutes appear at different points in the stories. IOn the writing styles I think it is important to know that they run the gambit of perspectives (1st, 2nd and 3rd). The stories are charmingly brief (20-25 page each) making it a great palette cleanser or pick up put down book. Now here's the but. Meet Cute really needed an introduction. Either whoever at Alloy collated it or whoever bought the authors together. Due to the diversity within the stories, I was wondering what the brief was. Even just a definition of a meet-cute would have been better than nothing. One other issue I had was that all the meet-cutes were implicitly or explicitly coded as romantic. I would have really liked one that was just a friendship or someone to tackle an ace protagonist. Standout stories: Click, Oomph, Say Everything.

Siege Etiquette by Katie Cotuguo This is a Queen Bee (Hailey) and Farm Boy (Wolf) hiding kinda from the cops in a bathroom. They have shared pasts, misunderstandings abound and there is a definite attraction. It's written in 1st person for only one person (Hailey's) something I don't read a lot but it works. It's an interesting premise well-executed in less than twenty pages. I can see where it could go if it was longer but it works really well at this length.

Print Shop by Nina LaCour It's Evie's first day at a new job, it's not what she expected but she is trying to make the best of it. One of the jobs given to her is setting up social media for the print shop. Lauren is a disgruntled customer. Evie identifies as queer and she has one of the most adorable coming out stories, it was essentially an accident. Nina LaCour has an engaging style. Her story is a meeting of worlds, a meeting of times. It's the perfect length and frames itself well.

Hourglass by Ibi Zoboi Hourglass focuses on Cherish, an African American girl living in a town where there are only 4 other African American families. It is set at the end of her senior year, right before prom. Hourglass is less about the meet-cute and more about female friendship and the end of an era. That is not to say the meet-cute isn't sweet, it is and it challenges some norms and expectations. I was sort of disappointed with Hourglass. I like Cherish. I wanted to know more, I wanted to see what choices she made. Or at a bare minimum, I want to see her rock that dress.

Click by Katherine McGee Click is fantastic. Unlike some of the other stories, it feels entirely self-contained and uses an alternating perspective. The main characters are the hurting and technologically inclined Alexa and the creative Raden, those alignments alone deserve applause. I feel like there is some inspiration taken from not only real-world dating apps but Scythe. It just made me happy. It's a hopeful story with endearing characters.

The Intern by Sara Shepard The main characters are slightly eccentric rock star Phineas and Clara the daughter of a celebrity and not what her father expects. Clara is involuntarily interning at her father's record label for the summer. Phineas and Clara meet as part of her role at V. It's a simple story about how two young people spend a day finding out each other in New York. Honestly, I got The Sun Is Also A Star vibes. It's not bad, it just feels a bit unoriginal and there aren't enough details given for me to really enjoy it.

Somewhere That's Green by Meredith Russo Somewhere That's Green is an opposite attract story. Nia is a young trans woman struggling with having her community acknowledge her identity. Lexie is a Christian girl at her school who appears to be leading the charge to have her use the male facilities rather than the female ones. While I appreciate Nia and Lexie I have issues with Meredith Russo's writing. Meredith Russo is a trans woman with that in mind her writing feels overly cliche and perhaps wasteful. It is a very personal opinion. The story isn't bad, I enjoyed it, I just wish there was something more real about it.

The Way We Love Here by Dhonielle Clayton This is a reasonably clever play on the red string of fate but also uses time travel elements. It's another wonderful, hopeful story with unexpected protagonists. The artistic, driven Viola and the creative but sick Sebastian. Its focus is the possibilities and alternatives life can offer. I would like to know where Dhonielle Clayton drew their inspiration from the setting is on an isolated island which you cannot leave, it all feels very mythological both using eastern and western elements. I really enjoyed it.

Oomph by Emery Lord Oomph is super sweet and the perfect amount of nerdy. The main ladies use Natasha Romanov and Peggy Carter as nicknames, well actually names. They are in an airport waiting for flights. It's very cliche but it's a cliche for a reason. It's just so good. The smores are brilliant. I loved the writing, it's funny and cute.

The Dictionary of You and Me by Jennifer L. Armentrout I'm nopeing all the way out of this one. I have issues. I'm a librarian and this is all kinds of bad and just annoying stereotypes that push my buttons. Basically, I know too much and I can't turn my brain off. It is kind of cute but it is also kind of creepy. Essentially she is a librarian and he is a patron with an overdue dictionary. When she rings him to try and get the book back they flirt. I just can't not see how wrong it is.

The Unlikely Likelihood of Falling in Love by Jocelyn Davies This is another one with perhaps reverse archetypes. She is a math nerd, he is a musician. The plot revolves around her mathematical inclination and a final assessment. Their meet-cute really is adorable and the thing of daydreams, eyes meeting through train carriage windows. Sam urns it into an exercise in probabilities which is adorable. I do like Sam, the plot and the ending. The writing is well suited to the character which is in and of itself isn't easy.

259 Million Miles by Kass Morgan 259 Million Miles focused on missed opportunities with a side of social conscious. The main characters, Philip and Blythe, are likeable and human. It is truly standalone and doesn't ask for more. The ending brings out mixed emotions as one wants from a story dealing with humanity. But it was nice to have a story that was basically a locked room, a true two people put together with only one thing in common. Though in the battle of the futuristic meet-cutes, it loses to Click... easily.

Something Real by Julie Murphy This is the only review I'm spoiler warning so see my Goodreads for this bit.

Say Everything by Huntley Fitzpatrick This is such a well written and unexpected story. But I don't know if it is a meet-cute, there is too much history there. Emma is a fantastic character, I appreciate her resilience and forthrightness. Sean is well, Sean is something. But Emma is an unreliable narrator. The story is written in 2nd person, the only one in the book written as such. Like the book of quotes idea popularised by A Walk to Remember The Book of Lost Opportunites sounds like a brilliant idea. It is such a strong story though, at least to me.

The Department of Dead Love by Nicola Yoon This is the perfect last story, the perfect last line. It is a visually stunning story that plays on some unexpectedly heavy ideas. While I was torn on the three central characters I loved the writing and world. Nicola Yoon has a way with words that evokes emotion.

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cannibalismyuri · 2 years ago

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babygirl4babygirl? no i'm in a cringe4cringe relationship <3

#elijah my heart my soul my world my everything #in my loving and adoring elijah era (but its less of an era and more of a lifetime)#sara says

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http-byler · 2 years ago

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out of context screenshots of me being SUPER normal abt @willelfanpage <3

#and there’s MORE… these are just my favorite #can you tell he’s my favorite person ever?#anyway. am unapologetic abt being GAY and SAPPY on main #sara. you are so cool and awesome and sweet and kind and generous and funny and I love you so so bad #in my loving and adoring sara era (but it’s less of an era and more of a lifetime)#sara aka the loml aka my soulmate aka my bff aka loveliest person ever #sara <33 #willelfanpage #elijah speaks #(decidedly not st/byler)

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tcplnyteens · 5 years ago

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All Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories Of Queer Teens Throughout The Ages Edited by Saundra Mitchell

Written by Anna-Marie McLemore, Natalie C. Parker, Nilah Magruder, Mackenzi Lee, Robin Talley, Malinda Lo, Dahlia Adler, Kate Scelsa, Elliot Wake, Scott Tracey, Tess Sharpe, Alex Sanchez, Kody Keplinger, Sara Farizan, Tessa Gratton, Shaun David Hutchinson and Tehlor Kay Mejia

In this wonderful collection of short stories, you will be pulled into worlds filled with magic and worlds much like ours, where love, in any form, can overcome all. Whether it be two girls becoming pirates and taking charge of their lives, a thief and witch tearing apart a corrupt system or a new years revelation, this book will pull at your heartstrings and is bound to make you want to fall in love.

–SPOILERS–

This book is such a great collection of short stories and I would highly recommend it to all. There are so many important lessons within each and every one of these stories and I think there are valuable pieces of information that I think everyone should have in their repertoire.

Roja: This story was so good, I’m not usually one for historical fiction but it is starting to grow on me, especially when magic and fairytales are involved. I loved this retelling of Little Red Riding Hood. I loved that it involved an accurate trans character, there are real historical accounts of girls dressing as men to fight, although they were not always trans, I did love the accurate historical representation. It was so great that the girl wasn’t ashamed of him and loved him for who he was, she fought for him even though people looked down on her for existing. These people didn’t even care enough to acknowledge her as a human. Her strength, her power, her willingness to fight against those oppressive men is not only representational of the plights of what women have gone through for centuries, but it’s also great to see a powerful female character stand up for what she believes in and for the people she loves. This story was just wonderful and I loved it so much. It is one of the many reasons I would recommend this book.

The Sweet Trade: I feel like this story fits a common theme that appears in some of the books that I’ve read: girls wanting to be pirates, which is awesome. I love that even though Clara is only sixteen she knows what she wants from life and it’s not to be married to some pushover of a man who only wants money. She wants to take control of her life and create her own destiny which is completely badass if you ask me. And then she meets Pearl, who is also running away from her wedding, and they help each other, women supporting women at its finest. It is such a sweet little story of two girls falling in love as they take charge of their lives. I liked it very much, although I wish it were a tad longer.

And They Don’t Kiss At The End: I don’t have a whole lot to say about this story but it did like it a lot. My most prominent reason for enjoying this story so much was that it had asexual representation. You never ever see aromantic or asexual representation and I really loved how this book went about it, it was just wonderful to see. Another reason I loved it was because Vince didn’t pressure Dee into doing anything she didn’t want to, he was completely accepting of her boundaries and that is so important in any kind of relationship. These types of stories are the kind I want to be made into a full out book, it’s so important for teens to know that they have options and whatever they might be feeling or not feeling is normal. Diverse representation in media is so important, and this book does it right.

Burnt Umber: This story was sweet and simple. I love the fact that you don’t really see the end coming. From the beginning, all Constantijn can think of is the handsome boy who works at the docks, it’s very endearing until Joost comes to model for his class. I was so excited that maybe they’d become friends and then something more, but then it turns out Joost is kind of mean and Constantijn loses interest, yes he may be pretty but he isn’t nice to Constantijn’s friends. I think that this is an important story about knowing what’s good for you and what’s not, no matter how appealing it may look on the outside. It is a very sweet little story and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

The Dresser And The Chambermaid: Again with the wonderful historical fiction! This was such a sweet little story, I don’t have a whole lot of analysis for this one but I will tell you I was so happy in the end when they both got to be dressers and Suzanna got recognition for her hairstyle. It was so funny that when they were kissing in the hallway and the king kind of walked in on them and was just like “whatever, I can’t judge since I’m going to meet my mistress and cheat on my wife” and just left. Like that was a little piece of comic relief and I loved it, what a wonderful upbeat little story.

New Year: Same as the last, I don’t have much to say about this story. I do think however, it was a great way to highlight the adversity that queer people have faced throughout history, especially queer people of color. ‘Minority’ groups have long faced persecution, as well as queer people. When you persecute two groups that sometimes overlap, its an onslaught of discrimination, and although this story doesn’t go very deep into that issue it hints at it. But I also think that this story was a little bit about the main characters queer awakening. She has little exposure to the LGBTQ community but she sees something in it that intrigues her and makes her feel something, and I think it’s important that people realize that exploration outside of the socially accepted “norms” is good and can show you parts of yourself that you didn’t even know existed. At least that’s what I gained from this story.

Molly’s Lips: I love this story, first it is a reference to one of my favorite songs, which is great, who doesn’t love Nirvana(more specifically the Vaselines)? I think it’s great that this story addresses the insane amount of grief the country was feeling over his man’s death. He was an icon loved by millions, and he was just gone. I love this because I totally get what Molly is feeling. When you love someone that much you just want to be enough to make all the hurt go away and make sure they will always be okay, but it’s not always enough to just be there, you have to listen and try to understand because that’s what they need you to do. The way this story played out, however short, was just perfect and adorable, like so many of the stories in this book I wish it were a full-length book.

The Coven: This story also contains something I read about often, witches. I love magic! Magic is so cool, in almost any aspect. I also just love the way this was laid out, I love Dean’s description of Vivi, I’m a sucker for women in cool hats and doing *scandalous* things in eras past. I also love the little easter egg in there, Gertrude Stein was having a conversation with young Ernest Hemingway, cool! But I just love this story, it’s very mysterious and its another piece of historical fiction, a story after my own heart. And who doesn’t love a little magic in Paris? I also liked that Dean had those foggy days because I totally feel that, when you’re a person who tends to take on other peoples problems because of your big heart, you put those problems ahead of dealing with your own pain, it was really great to see her deal with her grief and realize that she can help herself.

Every Shade Of Red: Another take on a fairytale, yay! Everyone knows the classic story of Robin Hood stealing from the rich to give to the poor, most kids my age grew up watching the Disney version with all the animals. But this version has a special place in my heart. I love fairytales and retellings of them, and I love that in this story we have Robin as a leader of a motley crew but he’s also trans which is so cool, we have a trans character where the story isn’t only about them being trans. That is so important, most YA novels and stories that have trans protagonists its only about their journey of self discovery and figuring out what they want to do with this newfound freedom, which isn’t a bad thing, but trans people have lives outside of their transition and dysphoria and I think it’s important that people recognize that. But I also think that this story would ring true for many trans people, their parents disowned them or cut ties completely because of who they truly are and this happened for Robin in this story, although I do like the twist that he used to be Marian, I was kind of suspecting it but it was still surprising. This story gives off Six of Crows vibes, even though there are no trans characters in that book it has similar themes (go read it if you haven’t yet). But I was so incredibly upset with the ending!! Totally unfair of them to do that to Robin, it was a cruel twist of fate that I didn’t see coming, and Will’s father no less, like wow. Did not see that coming at all, not cool, not cool at all. I did love this story but there needs to be more, I need to know if they find their way back to each other because if they never do I’ll be very upset for like, the rest of my life.

Willows: I had mixed feelings about this story. It was interesting and weird but also really confusing. Benjamin was himself, but also other people. And the Return? Like what is that? And if the town knew that he and Sebastian were a thing, why hadn’t they taken care of it yet if they cared so much about maintaining the sanctity village? Also in the end when they run away it was kind of implied that Sebastian knew that the witches were there and teat they could protect them, but it was written in a way that made it kind of hard to understand. Overall this story was intriguing but I think things could’ve been laid out more clearly so that it makes better sense to the reader.

The Girl With The Blue Lantern: I love this tory! Although its a little short for my liking its so cute, although I wonder what Oriana is, is she a sprite? A fairy? A nymph? Who knows but I like her. It sucks that Ella had to live with her father like that it was so awful, I can’t imagine, and then she’s been taking care of him and helping him this entire time and when she finally has enough money to et themselves up for a decent life he takes her money and accused her of stealing from him and selling her body to make money. Like that an awful man she never deserved that. I was a little nervous though when she stepped into the water, I thought something bad might happened but I was so glad that they are able to be together now and will be able to love each other forever, it’s such a nice happy ending. Very cute, 10/10.

The Secret Life Of A Teenage Boy: Again too short! I know this is a book of short stories but I want all for them to be full books, I love all of them too much. I did love this story, its just so sweet and innocent and its kind of a self-realization story, he always knew he was different and was to afraid to say anything but then by fate he meets this guy and it changes his whole life, even though it only took not even an hour, stuff like that just makes my heart melt, because that’s what I want true love to be like, one minute can change your whole perspective on life, and you just gotta roll with the punches but you also have to know what is good for you and what you want from life and I think that this story was a perfect example of that and I really enjoyed it.

Walking After Midnight: I love this era, the ’50s and ’60s are my jam, especially fashion-wise, but the era was so cool in many ways. This story was so sweet, I think it was another little piece of the lgbtq+ spectrum that we don’t usually get to see, maybe demisexual or asexual, but either way it was a super cute story about exploring your options, no matter where you are in life, you’re not stuck, there is a way out and you have options, it doesn’t matter your age or race or gender, you have those opportunities if you look for them they’ll be there. I just really like this story because it was just so hopeful and upbeat and it did have some serious parts but it was very just flowing but it also had a great underlying message.

The End Of The World as We Know It: I love this, I was born two years after the Y2K thing so I totally missed it but it sounded interesting. I also missed the Columbine shooting, the fact that this book brought it up was like a punch in the gut, the way that the characters said it was probably never going to happen again, and here I am in June of 2019 and in the twenty years since the Columbine there have been over 230 school shootings in the US, and although I don’t usually get into politics on this account I think that this is an important statistic that everyone should know. On a different note, I did like this story, it was sweet and simple, another story of self-discovery and young love like many in this collection, it was just super chill and I love the note at the end when it says “sorry I couldn’t stay I had to go break up with my boyfriend” like what a great way to start out the new year.

Three Witches: I love this story although I am a bit confused about the title, I don’t really know what it had to do with the story, I can only assume it is Gracia, Violante, and the unknown woman at the end of the book. This story made me sad but also happy, sad because this woman was being accused of being a sinner for loving a woman, she was being punished because the church said it wrong to love freely. It made me happy because she, in turn, found love in her imprisonment and set both herself and Gracia free. Stories like this really pull at my heartstrings because I don’t understand, and this is my personal opinion, I’m not judging anyone, how you can believe that one superior being makes everything so and he said that loving someone is wrong, I just don’t understand that. But this story made me happy because they both discovered strength in themselves and each other in times of weakness and that’s what love really is.

The Inferno and the butterfly: I love love love this story! It’s so good! Both of these boys had gone through so much and thought they had people who loved them and cared for them and both had that idea ripped from their hearts and minds but they found each other and they found a way to create real love that wouldn’t be taken away by anyone else, and that is beautiful. As I addressed earlier, historical fiction is growing on me, but magic has always been something I loved reading about. This story kind of reminded me of a darker shade of magic, old London and magic are like the best duo ever and this is such a great little love story and the combination is so good, this is probably my third favorite out of this collection.

Healing Rosa: This story is so cool, I have a little bit of an obsession with different cultures and their healing rituals, myths about where they come from interest me so much and I think that’s why I love this story so much. Another reason why I love this story is that it addresses in some aspect, mental illness and how it can affect someone, not only mentally but also physically. Lastly, I love this story because, in the end, Rosa’s dad accepted her for who she was and realised that his own sadness and bitterness was nothing compared to what he would experience if he lost his daughter and that’s what truly pulled me into this story. There are so many people in this world who are disowned and pushed away by their families because they don’t know how to accept their children’s differences and I think it’s important that we address the happier sides of the narrative instead of only the bad ones, it gives hope to those who may not have it, and that goes for everything in life.

Top Three: Every Shade of Red, Roja, The Inferno and The Butterfly

-maren

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that-bi-film-nerd · 6 years ago

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My Black Mirror Episode Rankings

One of the great things about Black Mirror is how varied your experience with the show will inevitably be compared to others, in terms of which episodes you connected greater with. My opinions are always shifting and changing with rewatches and with time to reflect.

That being said, here’s my spoiler free personal ranking of every episode of Black Mirror so far from least to most favourite (up to “Bandersnatch”):

20. The Waldo Moment

Still better than the majority of television out there with some clever concepts, this installment lacked truly engaging characters and at times felt too satirical to be plausible.

19. Men Against Fire

Similarly to The Waldo Moment, this episode suffered from underwritten leads and felt overly reliant on a twist, which is disappointingly obvious considering how well the show executed twists elsewhere.

18. Arkangel

I love a lot of things about Arkangel (including Rosemarie DeWitt’s underrated and amazing performance) but was slightly let down by the bizarre casting of Brenna Harding as a 15 year-old Sara as she looks at least 25, dulling the impact. It also skims over a potentially interesting debate about censorship during child development and instead goes with a fairly bland ending with a jarring sudden tone shift that feels dark for the sake of it.

17. Black Museum

Letitia Wright is the bright spot in an otherwise frustrating episode. It feels like a poor imitator of White Christmas and copies lots from its predecessor, it’s concepts feeling either recycled from better episodes or not delved deep enough into. That said it’s one of the most darkly funny installments and has lots of fun with its setup.

16. Playtest

Something about the way Playtest wrapped up left me wanting either a more simplified or more knowingly trippy ending. Other than that this is a solid episode with a great sense of atmosphere and dread.

15. The Entire History Of You

An episode that I often hear is amongst people’s favorites, I’ve never been fully thrilled by this early episode. Its central concept is one of the most eerily plausible and there’s a strong ensemble of actors however in my opinion it comes across as paint-by-numbers in comparison to other episodes.

14. The National Anthem

From this point all the episodes are amongst my favourites and ranking them was highly difficult. Iconic 👏🏻 episode 👏🏻. Once you’ve seen it however it does feel a lot less impressive than some of Black Mirror’s later hits, but is still a great starting point for the show and peak satire.

13. Crocodile

With a mixed reception on release, I think Crocodile is a lot better than the response to season 4 would have you believe, working better as a grounded thriller than a parable on technology. Its two central characters were beautifully conceived and played by Andrea Riseborough and Kiran Sonia Sawar (one to watch out for in the future). Recalling shocking moments from Breaking Bad at times, its bleak tone and gradually increasing tension left me severely shaken up and I actually quite enjoyed the controversial final twist.

12. Hated in the Nation

Whilst veering slightly too harshly into implausibility at times, I loved the Luther-esque police drama format and theming of this episode. Kelly MacDonald is a delight and the debate over twitter witchhunts has only become more potent since its release.

11. Hang the DJ

Joe Cole and Georgina Campbell are surely headed for great things, their effortless chemistry making this one of the most satisfying and enjoyable entries, in what feels like Black Mirror’s take on “The Lobster”. Also bonus points for an ending that leaves you unsure how to feel about what you’ve just seen.

10. Shut Up And Dance

Another episode that became an instant classic, Shut Up and Dance (led brilliantly by Alex Lawther) is a throwback to the gritty Channel 4 vibe of the pre-Netflix era. It goes out of its way to be as upsetting as possible, only heightened by the fact that the technology exists for this to occur in this very day and age. It’s final revelation and scene set to “Exit Music (For A Film)” is chilling stuff.

9. Metalhead

An episode I love that the majority seem to hate, I adore the stripped back quality to this episode, in a season that kept trying to trick me with plot twists. Maxine Peake is wonderful as always, instilling incredible depth to a character that barely speaks and there was a powerful sense of tragedy, my heart breaking for the world we live in and the future that awaits us.

8. White Bear

Another staple episode, everything is perfectly judged and the writing is amongst the best the show has ever done. Arguably the most memorable episode and one that demands you to discuss it afterward.

7. Be Right Back

This episode feels truly unique amongst the Black Mirror cannon, an intimate portrait of grief with some unsettling technological twists. Hayley Atwell and Domhnall Gleason give performances at home amongst “awards movies” and the episode is painfully grounded.

6. Bandersnatch

This interactive episode will inevitably create varied opinions based on each audience member’s experience. Personally, I was profoundly shaken at seeing my choices occur on screen and felt horribly guilty and twisted for what occurred as a result, as the choices became increasingly higher stakes. It also helped that I saw the ending that I believe was most satisfying as a conclusion thematically (the ending with an epilogue in the present day). That said, this episode is also amazing fun to rewatch and discover new strands which vary from hilarious to heart wrenching. Also Fionn Whitehead and Will Poulter are incredible for nailing multiple character arcs at once.

5. San Junipero

So well-made that it’s incredible to believe it’s part of the same low budget series that premiered on channel 4 less than 10 years ago, San Junipero feels monumental. Smart, funny, moving, nostalgic and troubling all at once, and Gugu Mbatha-Raw and Mackenzie Davis have created characters that are instant icons.

4. Fifteen Million Merits

Whilst the world freaked out over Daniel Kaluuya’s breakout role in Get Out in 2017, those of us who had seen him in this unsettling early episode already knew this was an actor capable of incredible power and emotion. There is something pervadingly disturbing about the shallow world presented in this dystopian episode, where pop-up ads and virtual currency are creepily merged with daily life. Highly upsetting and highly recognizable, in other words, highly Black Mirror.

3. White Christmas

For a long time the epitome of Black Mirror, White Christmas ticks every box: plausible yet unsettling future technological advancements, empathetic and interesting characters and a tricksy, twisty plot with sudden sharp turns. This episode will always hold a special place in my heart and was my unbeaten favourite until the Netflix era came about...

2. USS Callister

The teaser clips for this episode made me cringe: Black Mirror doing a retro sci-fi themed episode? What I didn’t expect at all was to be confronted by an excellent deconstruction of the “nerd who deserves the girl” narrative or an equally fun and creepily prescient tale of toxic masculinity, gamer culture and male abuse of power.

1. Nosedive

I was not ready for this episode. Not only my favourite Black Mirror episode so far, Nosedive is in my opinion one of the greatest modern science-fiction stories ever committed to screen, nailing the harmful social media culture we pretend isn’t there with devastating clarity. It’s interesting to read that Charlie Brooker was intending for Nosedive to be lighter and inspired by sitcoms when I found it to be one of the more excruciating episodes to sit through. The falseness and shallowness of the society presented is one I can see myself wishing for on Instagram, Lacey’s unfair self-criticism something I relate strongly to. This episode calls for a re-evaluation of our values and of our priorities in life and does so with a beautifully shot and scored (shout-out to Max Richter) tragedy of manners with a cathartic ending that struck me in a deep emotional place. I am so glad this episode exists and I could watch it over and over again.

It’s been an incredible 20 episodes of television and I can’t wait to see what else the creative writers and film makers are coming up with for season 5 later this year.

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maren-reads-books · 5 years ago

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All Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories of Queer Teens throughout the Ages Edited by Saundra Mitchell

--SPOILERS--

Like previous reviews of short story books, I will go through each of these stories in quick mini-reviews so that you guys can get unlimited access into the bookish section of my brain. This book is such a great collection of short stories and I would highly recommend it to all. There are so many important lessons within each and every one of these stories and I think there are valuable pieces of information that I think everyone should have in their repertoire.

Roja: This story was so good, I’m not usually one for historical fiction but it is starting to grow on me, especially when magic and fairytales are involved. I loved this retelling of Little Red Riding Hood. I loved that it involved an accurate trans character, there are real historical accounts of girls dressing as men to fight, although they were not always trans, I did love the accurate historical representation. It was so great that the girl wasn't ashamed of him and loved him for who he was, she fought for him even though people looked down on her for existing. These people didn't even care enough to acknowledge her as a human. Her strength, her power, her willingness to fight against those oppressive men is not only representational of the plights of what women have gone through for centuries, but it’s also great to see a powerful female character stand up for what she believes in and for the people she loves. This story was just wonderful and I loved it so much. It is one of the many reasons I would recommend this book.

The Sweet Trade: I feel like this story fits a common theme that appears in some of the books that I've read: girls wanting to be pirates, which is awesome. I love that even though Clara is only sixteen she knows what she wants from life and it's not to be married to some pushover of a man who only wants money. She wants to take control of her life and create her own destiny which is completely badass if you ask me. And then she meets Pearl, who is also running away from her wedding, and they help each other, women supporting women at its finest. It is such a sweet little story of two girls falling in love as they take charge of their lives. I liked it very much, although I wish it were a tad longer.

And They Don’t Kiss At The End: I don't have a whole lot to say about this story but it did like it a lot. My most prominent reason for enjoying this story so much was that it had asexual representation. You never ever see aromantic or asexual representation and I really loved how this book went about it, it was just wonderful to see. Another reason I loved it was because Vince didn't pressure Dee into doing anything she didn't want to, he was completely accepting of her boundaries and that is so important in any kind of relationship. These types of stories are the kind I want to be made into a full out book, it's so important for teens to know that they have options and whatever they might be feeling or not feeling is normal. Diverse representation in media is so important, and this book does it right.

Burnt Umber: This story was sweet and simple. I love the fact that you don't really see the end coming. From the beginning, all Constantijn can think of is the handsome boy who works at the docks, it's very endearing until Joost comes to model for his class. I was so excited that maybe they'd become friends and then something more, but then it turns out Joost is kind of mean and Constantijn loses interest, yes he may be pretty but he isn't nice to Constantijn’s friends. I think that this is an important story about knowing what's good for you and what’s not, no matter how appealing it may look on the outside. It is a very sweet little story and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

The Dresser And The Chambermaid: Again with the wonderful historical fiction! This was such a sweet little story, I don't have a whole lot of analysis for this one but I will tell you I was so happy in the end when they both got to be dressers and Suzanna got recognition for her hairstyle. It was so funny that when they were kissing in the hallway and the king kind of walked in on them and was just like “whatever, I can't judge since I'm going to meet my mistress and cheat on my wife” and just left. Like that was a little piece of comic relief and I loved it, what a wonderful upbeat little story.

New Year: Same as the last, I don't have much to say about this story. I do think however, it was a great way to highlight the adversity that queer people have faced throughout history, especially queer people of color. ‘Minority’ groups have long faced persecution, as well as queer people. When you persecute two groups that sometimes overlap, its an onslaught of discrimination, and although this story doesn't go very deep into that issue it hints at it. But I also think that this story was a little bit about the main characters queer awakening. She has little exposure to the LGBTQ community but she sees something in it that intrigues her and makes her feel something, and I think it's important that people realize that exploration outside of the socially accepted “norms” is good and can show you parts of yourself that you didn't even know existed. At least that's what I gained from this story.

Molly’s Lips: I love this story, first it is a reference to one of my favorite songs, which is great, who doesn't love Nirvana(more specifically the Vaselines)? I think it's great that this story addresses the insane amount of grief the country was feeling over his man's death. He was an icon loved by millions, and he was just gone. I love this because I totally get what Molly is feeling. When you love someone that much you just want to be enough to make all the hurt go away and make sure they will always be okay, but it's not always enough to just be there, you have to listen and try to understand because that's what they need you to do. The way this story played out, however short, was just perfect and adorable, like so many of the stories in this book I wish it were a full-length book.

The Coven: This story also contains something I read about often, witches. I love magic! Magic is so cool, in almost any aspect. I also just love the way this was laid out, I love Dean’s description of Vivi, I’m a sucker for women in cool hats and doing *scandalous* things in eras past. I also love the little easter egg in there, Gertrude Stein was having a conversation with young Ernest Hemingway, cool! But I just love this story, it's very mysterious and its another piece of historical fiction, a story after my own heart. And who doesn't love a little magic in Paris? I also liked that Dean had those foggy days because I totally feel that, when you're a person who tends to take on other peoples problems because of your big heart, you put those problems ahead of dealing with your own pain, it was really great to see her deal with her grief and realize that she can help herself.

Every Shade Of Red: Another take on a fairytale, yay! Everyone knows the classic story of Robin Hood stealing from the rich to give to the poor, most kids my age grew up watching the Disney version with all the animals. But this version has a special place in my heart. I love fairytales and retellings of them, and I love that in this story we have Robin as a leader of a motley crew but he's also trans which is so cool, we have a trans character where the story isn't only about them being trans. That is so important, most YA novels and stories that have trans protagonists its only about their journey of self discovery and figuring out what they want to do with this newfound freedom, which isn't a bad thing, but trans people have lives outside of their transition and dysphoria and I think it’s important that people recognize that. But I also think that this story would ring true for many trans people, their parents disowned them or cut ties completely because of who they truly are and this happened for Robin in this story, although I do like the twist that he used to be Marian, I was kind of suspecting it but it was still surprising. This story gives off Six of Crows vibes, even though there are no trans characters in that book it has similar themes (go read it if you haven't yet). But I was so incredibly upset with the ending!! Totally unfair of them to do that to Robin, it was a cruel twist of fate that I didn't see coming, and Will’s father no less, like wow. Did not see that coming at all, not cool, not cool at all. I did love this story but there needs to be more, I need to know if they find their way back to each other because if they never do I’ll be very upset for like, the rest of my life.

Willows: I had mixed feelings about this story. It was interesting and weird but also really confusing. Benjamin was himself, but also other people. And the Return? Like what is that? And if the town knew that he and Sebastian were a thing, why hadn't they taken care of it yet if they cared so much about maintaining the sanctity village? Also in the end when they run away it was kind of implied that Sebastian knew that the witches were there and teat they could protect them, but it was written in a way that made it kind of hard to understand. Overall this story was intriguing but I think things could've been laid out more clearly so that it makes better sense to the reader.

The Girl With The Blue Lantern: I love this story! Although its a little short for my liking its so cute, although I wonder what Oriana is, is she a sprite? A fairy? A nymph? Who knows but I like her. It sucks that Ella had to live with her father like that it was so awful, I can't imagine, and then she's been taking care of him and helping him this entire time and when she finally has enough money to et themselves up for a decent life he takes her money and accused her of stealing from him and selling her body to make money. Like that an awful man she never deserved that. I was a little nervous though when she stepped into the water, I thought something bad might happened but I was so glad that they are able to be together now and will be able to love each other forever, it's such a nice happy ending. Very cute, 10/10.

Walking After Midnight: I love this era, the ’50s and ’60s are my jam, especially fashion-wise, but the era was so cool in many ways. This story was so sweet, I think it was another little piece of the lgbtq+ spectrum that we don't usually get to see, maybe demisexual or asexual, but either way it was a super cute story about exploring your options, no matter where you are in life, you're not stuck, there is a way out and you have options, it doesn't matter your age or race or gender, you have those opportunities if you look for them they'll be there. I just really like this story because it was just so hopeful and upbeat and it did have some serious parts but it was very just flowing but it also had a great underlying message.

The End Of The World as We Know It: I love this, I was born two years after the Y2K thing so I totally missed it but it sounded interesting. I also missed the Columbine shooting, the fact that this book brought it up was like a punch in the gut, the way that the characters said it was probably never going to happen again, and here I am in June of 2019 and in the twenty years since the Columbine there have been over 230 school shootings in the US, and although I don't usually get into politics on this account I think that this is an important statistic that everyone should know. On a different note, I did like this story, it was sweet and simple, another story of self-discovery and young love like many in this collection, it was just super chill and I love the note at the end when it says “sorry I couldn't stay I had to go break up with my boyfriend” like what a great way to start out the new year.

Three Witches: I love this story although I am a bit confused about the title, I don't really know what it had to do with the story, I can only assume it is Gracia, Violante, and the unknown woman at the end of the book. This story made me sad but also happy, sad because this woman was being accused of being a sinner for loving a woman, she was being punished because the church said it wrong to love freely. It made me happy because she, in turn, found love in her imprisonment and set both herself and Gracia free. Stories like this really pull at my heartstrings because I don't understand, and this is my personal opinion, I’m not judging anyone, how you can believe that one superior being makes everything so and he said that loving someone is wrong, I just don't understand that. But this story made me happy because they both discovered strength in themselves and each other in times of weakness and that's what love really is.

The Inferno and The Butterfly: I love love love this story! It's so good! Both of these boys had gone through so much and thought they had people who loved them and cared for them and both had that idea ripped from their hearts and minds but they found each other and they found a way to create real love that wouldn't be taken away by anyone else, and that is beautiful. As I addressed earlier, historical fiction is growing on me, but magic has always been something I loved reading about. This story kind of reminded me of a darker shade of magic, old London and magic are like the best duo ever and this is such a great little love story and the combination is so good, this is probably my third favorite out of this collection.

Healing Rosa: This story is so cool, I have a little bit of an obsession with different cultures and their healing rituals, myths about where they come from interest me so much and I think that's why I love this story so much. Another reason why I love this story is that it addresses in some aspect, mental illness and how it can affect someone, not only mentally but also physically. Lastly, I love this story because, in the end, Rosa’s dad accepted her for who she was and realised that his own sadness and bitterness was nothing compared to what he would experience if he lost his daughter and that's what truly pulled me into this story. There are so many people in this world who are disowned and pushed away by their families because they don't know how to accept their children's differences and I think it’s important that we address the happier sides of the narrative instead of only the bad ones, it gives hope to those who may not have it, and that goes for everything in life.

Top Three: Every Shade of Red, Roja, The Inferno and The Butterfly

-maren

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