#in most cases it costs you nothing to let specific people just enjoy a song or episode or [fill in the blank] without patronizing lectures

[anghraine]

"Let people enjoy things" vs "let people criticize things" is incredibly tedious for a lot of reasons, but one of them is that these things are not actually contradictory.

[deepdarkdelights]

Hello love! I’m the one who wrote to you about the potential inspo for a story. Again you can throw it away or use it, it doesn’t matter haha. I just truly enjoy your writing so I thought that if anybody could make something out of nothing, it would be you. Anyways, I was inspired by the picture above. Oh and I was going to send you this anonymously, but then the picture wouldn’t have been saved (and I’m super shy about this lol, seriously I’m blushing).

Story Begins:

The world holds its secrets, and I hold mine. Deception is never formed by intention, it’s mere collateral damage based off promises and dreams of distant futures.

My dreams were based off my family at first. Based off my brother and mother. Based off the memory of my sister.. But that’s all in the past, and now that I’ve awoken from the imagery of delusional hope. I’m left to deal with the cost of my deception.

—————————————————————

“Mr.Kim, I see you’re yet to finish you’re meal. Oh my! You couldn’t even have a bite?!” The petite young woman shrieking at the untouched meal moved forward to retreat the “warm” mushroom soup that was meant to be in the belly of her boss by now.

With a heavy sigh “Mr.Kim” turns around in his chair. Face still in concentration from whatever is in his hands, he reaches toward his cup of coffee (the only thing for consumption that didn’t occupy too much time).

His secretary stood in front of him speechless at his lack of response. Yes Mr. Kim was young for his profession, his grayish blueish strands contrasting from the dark wool of his turtleneck, his glasses modestly framed to his face, and shiny gold watch that clung to his wrist all precedent to what would be considered a young bachelor -but no, instead this demeanor belonged to a top detective in the field of criminal justice.

From what Jisoo, his secretary knew of him, he was a very bright and professional detective. She was aware of his battle with prostitution rings in South Korea, who’s successful case landed him a job in the New York station of private affairs and criminal justice, where he also succeeded in bringing down one of the most influential law firms for the involvement of illegal transactions and drug smuggling. His work on the field had provided him with a private, yet comfortable life. Not long after his station in the New York City department of justice, he and a couple of team members were asked to work for the The General Directorate for Internal Security in France.

“Jisoo, I know we both were born in Korea, but could you please drop the formalities? I’ve known you for 3 years now “, said the heavy voice in the chair.

At this Jisoo felt a pang if guilt for her earlier charade. Mr.Ki-Na..Namjoon’s voice sounded tired. ‘Of course he is’, she thought to herself. He had spent the last 2 years and a half perusing an unamed organization whos’ motive was unclear, but actions centered around the illegal transaction of money.

“Jisoo? Are you even listening?” The young secretary looks up, “Sorry what was that?”

“I guess I’m not the only one who has had a rough day. I asked you.. am i not a nice person?” At this Jisoo meets the eyes of Namjoon without hesitation.

“What?”

“Have I been mean to you in anyway? Have I thrown your sandwiches out or made fun of those ridiculous pens you bring to work?” He asks with his eyebrows comically lifted.

Jisoo, finally understanding where he is getting at responds, “Not until this point you haven’t”.

“See! We even banter for crying out loud! If that doesn’t scream friendship I don’t know what does!” Namjoon is practically out of breath delivering his sermon on how good of a friend he had been throughout the past three years until it gets to the point where Jisoo has listened to it twice.

“Okay, okay! Enough... friend”, it’s not that she dislikes thinking of Namjoon as a friend, but more of the fact that she doesn’t perfer to associate herself in that aspect with any of her coworkers -much less higher ups. Her lack of attachment also has to do with the fact that back home, in the same position she stands today, she had seen a handful of her beloved coworkers in caskets in no less than 5 weeks of knowing them. However, despite all of this, she can’t deny that Namjoon has acted out the role of a bigger brother during her stay in France, especially in the sense of bringing her Korean food from one particular restaurant on the outskirts of the city. Their relationship has always been comfortable and despite his undeniably handsome features, there was no physical attraction between them... it was nice.

“Okay now say it with enthusiasm, as if you actually like me. Come on FRRI- “ all the sudden the phone rings. Jisoo turns to quickly take her exit, but not before she hears a curse from the man who was a second away from singing the friends theme song.

‘Namjoon i really hope you don’t come close to catching these guys’ she silently prays. She knows the consequences of bringing justice, she’s seen the red splatter that the name decorated itself with.

—————————————————————

“Joon this just turned from a fraud to a murder scene. We are not just talking about big investments, but the murder of two prime ministers and the chief of justice in Germany.”

Namjoon looks at his fellow detective and reaches out for the stack of papers near his desktop. “What did Germany say?”

Yoongi, his literal partner in (fighting) crime answers with a simple, “jack shit”. “They don’t believe it’s connected”.

“Then why do we?” Namjoon at this point is at a dead end yet again. This same secret organization has plagued his office walls, desk, and even bed for almost three years. It’s normal for a case such as this one to take time, but when your teammates and you are specifically placed in an international office for one specific case, it gets a bit frustrating.

“Because.. both the German officer and the Prime Minister in Bordeaux had their tounges taken out.”

“What!?” Had this been any other criminal investigation, this piece of information would not have surprised Namjoon. This however was not just any case, for the duration of his stay in France, and the additional years he was not assigned to this area, this was the first similarity between the crimes. Whoever these people were, made sure to not leave a single message, nor fingerprint, nor act of pride that would give them away. It was almost as if these crimes were committed themselves, and the world was forced to accept it for the time being.

OKAY IT IS GARBAAGGÉÉ, but hey if it works as inspo I’m all for it. Oh by the way, the first part is from jungkook’s perspective. When I initially started I thought about there being a mysterious “sister” aka y/n (didn’t plan out how or why she disappeared yet lol), and because I’m a garden hoe for yandere, I thought about making jungkook slowly progress into a ridonculous yandere. As you can see it’s a bit all over the place. But anyways, I freaking love your writing and throw this away or change it up or use it as it is, it’s all yours.

Ps. Love ya

Hello my lovely!

First off, I am so proud of you for being brave and sending this off of anon! I know how vulnerable that can be, so thank you really for feeling comfortable enough to do so!

Secondly, omfg you have skill! Like I was getting into it and I legit screeched when I realized there wasn't more to read! You did so well sweetie!

Moving on, I really enjoyed this, I don't think you realize just how much skill and potential you have as a writer. I want to read more please!

I do really like this as a concept, although I am coming off of an investigator Joon fic so I think I would need to take a break from that theme lol.

I would like to talk about this more if you're up to it, I think you should pursue this idea because it has great foundations. Let's talk more please you little genius you!

P.S. (ILY TOO 💜💜💜)

[regrettablewritings]

Preferences: Guilty Pleasures

Characters: Okoye, Lucifer Morningstar, Dewey Finn, Peter B. Parker, Ahkmenrah

Okoye

Okoye is straightforward and stony upon first impressions. And, admittedly, even afterward. The only real difference is that, if one gets to know her better, they might find shock in the fact that in spite of her appearance, she Dora leader actually likes sweets. However, it’s not sweet things in general that Okoye feels guilty for enjoying: It’s Starbucks.

Starbucks is the antithesis of everything Okoye is associated with: Supremely un-Wakandan, a chain establishment, and overall just not worth the absurd cost. Not to mention superbly unhealthy when compared to the rest of a fighter’s typical diet. But yet you can bet that every time she needs to go out of the country or off-continent, there’s an invasive shout for joy at the possibility that she might be able to get her hands on a Frappucino (followed by an internal scolding).

She can’t even explain exactly why she likes it; there are plenty of good, even healthier sweet things back in Wakanda -- heck, back anywhere else!

But it’s a bit like when someone craves the cheap taste of school pizza over a legit pie cooked in a stone hearth: She just loves the sugary sweetness, the application of whipped cream to an already tooth-rottingly saccharine icy drink, the addition of chocolate. But Bast, she also hates it. But ever since T’Challa practically shoved a grande cup of caramel frappucino into her hands, she hasn’t felt entirely the same.

Against her better judgement, she’s more or less unintentionally tried 45% of the menu drink-wise. She doesn’t particularly care much for the food part of the establishment, though if she should ever find herself in one during the fall, she might indulge in a chunky slice of pumpkin bread under the conviction that it’s healthy enough for being gourd-related. Never mind that it’s just a cinnamon mixture with more sugar than actual pumpkin-derived anything.

Really, of all those mentioned on this list, Okoye is the one who probably feels the most disappointed in herself whenever she indulges in her guilty pleasure: It’s a betrayal to her patriotism, to her dignity, and to her attempts to eat healthy. But damn, if this type of betrayal doesn’t taste so addicting . . .

Lucifer Morningstar

The thing about Lucifer is that it’s actually a bit hard for him to feel any regrets over liking anything; he’s the Devil, after all, so his whole thing is about embracing the things that make you feel good. And even besides that, he’s mostly managed to skate by in his time on Earth by categorizing things as Stuff He Likes, Stuff He Tolerates, Stuff He Doesn’t Bother With, and Stuff Humans Seem to Enjoy But He Doesn’t Quite Get. It’s a tad restricted of a system but you can’t argue with results.

However, just because something is difficult doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. The Devil can, in fact, recognize absurdity in liking certain things. Hence why, to a point, he’s fallen prey to his own bizarre pleasures: The Devil has guilty pleasures, and it’s in stupid YouTube videos, Vine, and TikTok.

After he finally drank the Kool-Aid and got himself a smart phone, it was only a matter of time before Lucifer fell down the rabbit hole that is YouTube prank videos and strange uploads about nonsense and animal humor. It was also only a matter of time before he found himself stumbling into Vine compilations. The Celestial is terrifically mystified by the creative power of humans, managing to tell entire stories and peak comedy in only a span of seven seconds. But he’s also quite loathe to have realized it’s been long defunct by the time he’s discovered it.

He’s even more loathe to find himself making references in his daily life: He has actually quietly blurted out, “I sure hope it does” in response to seeing a Road Work Ahead sign, causing Chloe some confusion (and Lucifer lots of embarrassment). He has referred to a culprit as “Jared, Age 19″. Since discovering Vine, there has been at least one night wherein he and a bed mate were sitting there with barbecue sauce on his tiddies, but that was by sheer coincidence.

But eventually the Vine compilation well dried up, and the inevitable transfer over to TikTok happened. And Luci honestly doesn’t know what to make of TikTok. He would describe it as Vine’s Molly-addicted cousin based on its obsession with dancing, but the dances are so stationary that even that doesn’t seem quite right. The videos on the platform are also much more . . . bizarre. And some of them admittedly trigger a fight-or-flight response in him, to which he always chooses the third option of freezing if only so he can keep watching the train wreck unfold before his eyes.

The trouble with TikTok, he’ll admit to himself, is that it’s not as easy to find iconic content the same way he could with Vine. However, this isn’t to say that he hasn’t found anything worth watching over and over and over again . . .

(Let’s just say the “Wolf Pack Compilation” lives in his head rent-free, and he’s both too amused by it and too overwhelmed by its vibe to try and evict it.)

Dewey Finn

Dewey is . . . a special case. Given that he associates messy living and indulging in one’s pleasure a part of the rocker lifestyle, he’s generally quick to embrace whatever makes him happy. He’s very upfront about his interests and is arguably almost incapable of feeling shame. But it’s in there: Deep down. No, not in himself -- in his Spotify. Specifically, a Spotify account made on an email he never uses because it was made specifically to create this separate, uber secret playlist.

One marked “Actual Musical Bops.”

Dewey hates musicals: They’re cheesy, uninspired, gaudy, ridiculous, totally aimed at chicks with weird fantasies that he could never aspire to, and the music is just overall unimpressive. And yet, somehow, against his music elitist nature, a handful have managed to slip through the cracks. At the very least, a handful of numbers have clawed their way past his defenses and into his ear, where they now live rent-free.

In spite of his best efforts, the problems are that he’s a New Yorker, so it’s inevitable that he hears a song or two; and also that, as an instructor (to wealthy New York tweens whose families can afford frequent tripes to the Great White Way, no less), he’s definitely going to wind up hearing about some shows and their stand-out numbers: Against his will, he knows the lyrics to “My Shot”; he has cried in the secrecy of his apartment to “When I Grow Up”; in the never-necessary reason he needs to remember how many minutes there are in a year, he sings it inside his head; hell, he’s even found himself trying to figure out the electric guitar riff from “The Phantom of the Opera” during his down time.

What’s all the more embarrassing is that, given how he presents himself as a music elitist, there’s just no way he can come back from this if anyone were to know. He has to catch himself when he finds himself humming “Johanna” in the teacher’s lounge. He scowls at himself when he can’t sleep and gives in and starts playing “No One is Alone.” He wants to kick his thick ass every time he realizes he’s excited to have stumbled across a “slime tutorial” on YouTube, this one with better quality than the last. The reason he actually put a password on his phone wasn’t out of privacy like a sensible person would, but out of a need to make sure that no one ever found out that he had downloaded the entire Beetlejuice soundtrack, including jankily-recorded songs that never made it to the official cast recording for whatever reason!

And should anyone ever find out about any of this, Dewey has a plan: “Oh, I’m doing research. I’m studying these songs so I can give the kids a lesson on what not to do as actually competent musicians.”

But the lesson would never actually come. Mainly because he keeps prolonging his “research” . . .

He’s also developed a bit of a soft spot for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic due to some students gushing about it, but he would rather sooner die than ever be associated with the term “brony.”

Peter B. Parker

Peter is at a point where he’s too tired to really care about the idea of guilty pleasures. The way he sees it, there are bigger priorities at stake than worrying about someone finding out about your love of some hokey activity or food or form of entertainment.

Besides, he’s a New Yorker: There’s way weirder stuff for people to just not pay any real attention to. Hence why he thinks nothing of his bizarre eating habits. And no, this isn’t referring to his disastrous appetite: This is about his tendency to eat food with his hands. Foods that, well, he really should probably utilize eating utensils for.

To be fair, this habit has always existed in him in some form or another, especially since, as Spider-Man, he often needs to eat food on the go. But during the time he spent living the life of a depressed bachelor, it came out in full force. On the rare occasion he wasn’t eating a food that deserved to be eaten by hand, he often found himself loathing the idea of doing the dishes afterward. There would be days he’d feel only slightly less depressed; enough to make a box of Kraft Mac n Cheese in the pot, but not enough to avoid cutting out the middle man.

He’s thankful the craptastic apartment wasn’t also see-through because if it were, he’s positive his neighbors would’ve thought they were bearing witness to a man’s breakdown as he wept into a pot of macaroni and cheese, his hand full of the stuff, while wearing a Spider-Man costume. (And, to be fair, they actually would be.)

In addition to this, there were also those nights where he would be prepared to actually tuck in to a plate of spaghetti, only for some crime going on elsewhere in the city to drag him away. By the time he’d return, the plate would’ve been cold and his energy too depleted to want to even dream about cleaning more than he already had to.

The great news is that he’s thankfully done a 180, now able and willing (if begrudgingly) to clean up after himself. But bad news is that this feral man will still eat a fully-loaded baked potato like an apple. In a park. In front of women and children. He’s just too tired to care anymore. He’s aware of the guilt in this as a concept, but he’s also aware that he needs to take whatever happiness he can get out of whatever he does. And if that means eating everything by hand, then so be it!

Ahkmenrah

Funnily enough, Ahkmenrah doesn’t seem to experience much of any shame for enjoying the things most might feel the need to hide: He’s constantly curious and has missed out on a lot over the centuries, so why should he feel bad for wanting to indulge in them? Celebrity gossip is just a more fun version of the palace gossip he’d grown up hearing as a boy; reality TV is like watching a play, but with much more fights, less deaths, and more faulty romances; and sloppy meatball subs are like a feast for a man of his time!

Besides, he’s a king: Kings shouldn’t have to feel embarrassment over what the common folk might think.

And yet . . . It took some time, but eventually Ahkmenrah did experience it: Guilt in his pleasures.

He couldn’t even recall where it had all started. Maybe he was searching for more content to swallow after the most recent season of his new favorite show had ended? Whatever the case, he wound up biting off more than he could chew when he stumbled upon . . . fanfiction.

The adorable yet sad thing is that he didn’t even think anything of it at first. It wasn’t until he brought up a ship he’d invested his last few nights awake exploring on the computer: Nobody knew what the crap he was talking about, so of course he felt the need to explain it. But the more he talked, the more perplexed his friends looked. And the more he could feel his cheeks and ears burn.

Oh, he thought. Is this . . . embarrassment? Is that what this feels like? Oh, this is just foul.

Thankfully, nobody pressured him to keep talking about it, but the poor king sure as heck didn’t feel much of a desire to talk any further about it. But he needed to talk to somebody about his newly acquired “feels” as those online were calling them.

Joining fanfiction-oriented sites was the next obvious step, of course, but he’s experienced mixed feelings about it: On one hand, it’s nice to talk with people who share similar views and excitement about a fictional couple. But on the other, the digital wars that have broken out both disturb him and bring out the worst in him.

Like, of course there are bigger things to deal with than whether or not So-So is better off with Him-Ham, but if you truly think that Blah-Blah and Himhaw are a healthy relationship, then you can go do a service and bury yourself in the desert sands to provide substance to the hungry beetles with your flesh --

Suffice to say, a lot of the guilt in this pleasure seems to come from the fact that Ahk can get a little too emotionally invested if the work is really good. He tries to limit his interactions to commenting and praising certain works, and encouraging content creators. However, he’s also contemplated contributing his own pieces of fiction to the fandom . . .

[morfinwen]

1 for Angela, 2 for Christopher, 3 for Reagan, 4 for Neal, 5 for Lanzo, 6 for Ash, 9 for Connie, 10 for Aidan, 11 for Q, 14 for Nate, 15 for Amanda, 19 for Niner, 20 for Elise, 23 for Julie, 25 for Jerome, 28 for Kayla, 29 for Hannah, 31 for Knife, 33 for Elarin, 37 for Meaghan, 38 for Leah, 40 for Avery, 47 for Ian, and 50 for Lauren, please!

Read more!

1. What is Angela's reaction to a minor inconvenience? Such as getting her sweater caught on a door handle?

If it’s minor enough, she’ll barely react at all. If it’s slightly more disruptive, she’ll still only react insofar as is necessary to handle it -- that is, clean up a spill, change her shirt, restack the fallen papers, etc.

Internally, Angie is rarely as calm as she acts. She puts thought into everything she does and always has an idea of where she’s going and what she’ll do next, so even a small inconvenience can throw her plans into disarray. But she learned from a very young age to control her emotional reactions: outbursts made kind people uncomfortable and gave unkind people knowledge of how to hurt her. So she keeps a very close eye on her emotional state at all times and has a list of tried-and-true methods to calm herself down: breathing exercises, a song to hum to soothe herself, little reminders to herself, an imaginary ‘happy place’ she pictures, etc.

Not that a minor inconvenience usually requires an extensive amount of calming down, of course. But enough little things can add up.

2. For Christopher, tea, coffee, hot chocolate, or other?

In the morning, coffee. Usually straight black, or with an ungodly amount of sugar. He always regrets adding the sugar, but sometimes he needs the rush.

In the evenings, tea. Green if it’s close to bedtime, but he always gets a wide variety and is regularly trying out different versions. He has preferences, but he doesn’t feel strongly enough about it to get boxes of specific types. He’ll usually add cream and honey to tea, unless it clashes with the tea’s flavor.

On winter nights, hot chocolate with marshmallows, and whipped cream on special occasions.

3. What does Reagan's safe space look like?

Her safe space is her bedroom, which is small but not cramped, somewhat messy but in a sort of organized fashion -- there might be a few dirty clothes on the floor and a mostly stable stack of clean ones on top of the dresser, but you can see the floor and aren’t likely to trip over anything. Apart from the bed and dresser, there’s a nightstand by the bed, with a lamp and a stack of graphic novels on it from the last time she couldn’t fall asleep for half the night, and an armchair in the corner with her guitar next to it. There’s a couple windows with curtains -- light, gauzy ones to let in the light, with thicker, darker ones she can pull closed to keep out city lights at night if she feels the need.

Usually after work Reagan watches TV or uses the computer in her living area, but if she’s spent too much time around people lately, she’ll go back to her bedroom and play guitar, or lay on the bed and listen to an audiobook, or read one of her graphic novels while she listens to music through headphones.

4. What does Neal consider to be an unforgivable action? Why?

Neal has a hard time with violence or cruelty towards children. If you do anything to hurt a child, or even just yell at them, he’s not going to be comfortable in your presence for a long time, even if you sincerely apologize.

5. Does Lanzo have any nicknames or pet names or other aliases?

Nicknames: Not at present. Honestly he’s not really a nickname kind of guy, though sometimes his names have been long or odd enough that he just accepted people would use a nickname because it’s easier.

Pet names: His third wife Évelyne called him “mon chéri”. His first two wives weren’t close enough to him to have pet names for him, at least not ones he cared for, and his fourth wife wasn’t a pet names kind of woman. Amanda probably isn’t, either.

Aliases: Lanzo has so many aliases. He’s got a notebook where he’s got them all written down -- vampires have excellent memories, but after a couple hundred years, it can be a bit tricky to hunt down the exact memory you want without some kind of nudge. Most of them are variations on family names, but a couple (like Lanzo, for example) are just ones he liked the sound of.

He’s used a few of them more than once. The only one he’ll never use again is Alexander.

6. What kind of books comfort Ash? What books help him heal after a hard day?

Ash has to be in the right mood for poetry. A bad mood is usually the right mood, at least with the right kind of poem (nature ones, mostly). There’s an old, thick hardcover he keeps in his bedside table that’s got a lot of poems he really likes the cadence of, and he’ll often read them aloud to himself before going to bed, almost like meditation.

9. What is Connie's trigger point? What makes him angry, sad, or makes him go off?

Angry: Bad science practices. Violence against others, especially women and children.

Sad: Poor familial relationships. Ostracization from one’s community.

10. What kind of jokes make Aidan laugh?

Aidan’s sense of humor is not sophisticated -- he’ll laugh at just about anything: slapstick, puns, black humor, dirty jokes, etc. Nothing hurtful, though.

11. Does Q enjoy pranks or hate them? Is he likely to fall for a prank?

Q does not like pranks, but he’s learned to tolerate them -- one of the costs of being close with his cousin. He can fall for the more subtle pranks, or ones that rely on knowledge outside of his wheelhouse, but he’s certainly not an easy mark.

He has found enjoyment occasionally in pranking other people. He’s got a latent mean streak that comes out if someone angers him badly enough or over a long enough period, or if he’s been forced to spend too much time with his aunt and uncle recently. So his pranks have usually been a form of revenge, less fun and jokey and more humiliating or painful (though not debilitating or permanent).

14. Is Nate a simple person to please or difficult?

Deceptively difficult. He doesn’t have a lot of interest in expensive or complicated things, but though he may be satisfied with cheaper and simpler, he still has high, exacting standards for those things.

For example, Nate will be much happier if you order a pizza for dinner than if you offer to take him to a five-star “experimental” restaurant, but he has very particular ideas about what is and is not acceptable on a pizza, and a detailed hierarchy of delivery pizza joints. It might almost be easier to go with the fancier options -- at least in that case, his expectations will be lower.

15. What is the first thing people notice about Amanda?

Her green eyes. She’s always been proud of them, since she’s the only one in her immediate family who ahs them, and likes to wear makeup that highlights them or makes them stand out.

19. What does Niner consider to be her lowest point?

As noted here, Niner and Marrow, another werecat, split off from the group they were with when they started a romantic relationship. They were together for about two years, during which time Marrow became increasingly controlling and abusive. After Niner finally reached her breaking point and got out, she spent several weeks effectively on the run, avoiding other people and civilization in general out of pure fear. She’s never been that desperate or scared in her life, and she never wants to feel that way again.

20. Does Elise have a comfort item?

Not anymore, though as a child she had a tiger plushie that she never went to bed without. Bandit the Tiger is still in her house in a box somewhere -- she set him aside after college, hoping to give him to one of her children someday.

23. What is Julie's favorite food and who cooks it best?

Chicken alfredo. Kayla cooks it the best.

Kayla cooks most things the best, especially in the Allwinter household.

25. What are some things Jerome finds difficult to do? Or say?

Jerome doesn’t find it difficult to trust, per se, but it takes him a while to do it, especially with regards to his family’s -- particularly Hannah’s -- safety. Similarly it can take him a long time to warm up to people he thinks he shouldn’t trust or like, even if they don’t do anything that even hints they shouldn’t be trusted.

28. If Kayla was in today's world, what social media platforms would she avoid? Or be prominent on?

She wouldn’t have much of a presence on any social media platform, really. She’d have a Facebook (or something similar), mostly to keep in touch with friends and family, share photos, and to be a part of groups for moms and local organizations and the like. She’d almost never update her status, though.

29. Is Hannah an organized person? Or more laissez-faire?

Hannah isn’t the neatest person, but she does like organization, after a fashion. She color-codes her schoolwork, practices her music in a particular order, eats her meals one food item at a time, etc.

31. Knife has been invited to a masquerade ball. What mask does she wear?

A fox mask, like this one.

33. How does Elarin act around people she doesn't know? Is she shy around strangers or dismissive of them?

Elarin is very, very careful how much of herself she lets show around people she’s unfamiliar with. That includes how much she’s guarding herself. Unless they’re unusually observant, they probably won’t even notice her treating her friends differently.

She’s not naturally a suspicious person, but she was never the most trusting, either, and she’s learned to be much more guarded. Several years post-war, she loosens up. A little.

37. Meaghan has been kidnapped. Who has kidnapped her and how does she escape?

If Meaghan has been kidnapped, it’s almost a guarantee that she’s allowed it to happen somehow. Either she hopes to talk to the person kidnapping her, or it’s part of a bigger plan.

Jedi have a lot of enemies, particularly in her era, though the list of ones that would kidnap her rather than try to kill her is probably considerably shorter.

She could certainly escape on her own if she wanted to, or she might wait for her friends and allies to come for her, depending on the situation.

38. How does Leah unwind after a long day?

A hot meal, around the campfire at one of ‘her’ settlements or at her house in Diamond City with Mac and their boys, followed by a long, hot bath. Then she’ll sit up for a couple hours listening to the radio, or sharing entertaining stories with friends.

After that, it doesn’t matter if she goes straight to bed or has to stay up and keep watch for a few hours. So long as she doesn’t have to get up and shoot something, she unwinds almost as much from watching the stars as she does from a good night’s sleep.

40. Avery's friend has just been mugged. What's her reaction?

It depends on the friend. Someone tries to mug most of her friends, there’s probably not much left for her to do except laugh at the idiot -- assuming they’re even still alive, of course.

If for some reason her friend couldn’t handle the mugger themselves, then Avery will take it upon herself to hunt the mugger down. Considering that this means the mugger targeted someone who couldn’t properly defend themselves, if Avery tracks them down, the consequences will be worse than if the friend had dealt with them on their own. The consequences of hurting one of Avery’s friends are very, very serious.

47. What is Ian's reaction when someone does something nice for him?

Big grin, attempt to hug the person (unless it’s very clear they won’t appreciate it), “Aw, thanks!”

If it’s a big enough gesture, you can actually make him speechless. It’s happened once or twice.

50. How does Lauren sleep at night? Is she a heavy or light sleeper? Does she dream or have nightmares? Does she find it easy to sleep or is she more a night owl?

Lauren rarely has trouble falling or staying asleep. She’s a fairly heavy sleeper, but sufficiently loud thunder or other disruptive noise can wake her. She dreams occasionally, more often when she’s stressed or sick, and has had a couple nightmares in her life, again when she was really stressed or sick. She’s not a night owl, but she’s not a morning person, either.

Thanks for asking!

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Stark Spangled Forever- Utter Nonsense Drabble... 40 Questions!

Yeah so don’t ask me where this came  from, but I saw these floating around and for some reason decided it would be funny if Steve and Katie answered  some of them instead of me...

I think the original post was from @odaatlover​  and I think I was taggeed by @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​. Anyway, I took my favourite ones and this was the result...enjoy!

1. What’s one animal you wish you could have as a pet but can’t?

Katie: I’d kinda like a tiger. They’re so graceful and  pretty but pack a mean bite and you wouldn’t mess with one would you?

Steve: Who does that remind you of?

2. Favorite thing to wear to sleep?

Steve: (grinning) Nothing.

Katie : I can confirm that is also my favourite thing he sleeps in...

3. What song really gets you going?

Katie: In what way? If it’s to dance and just act like a crazy fool to then its always going to be “Back in Black” because it reminds me a lot of Tony and happy times growing up. But if its one to spark memories then its our wedding song.

Steve: “The Only One In Color” by Trapt. I also kinda like the John Legend song  “You and I” because it reminds me of her, you know, the bit aout trying on every damned out fit she ownes before we can go out.

Katie: I don’t do that.

Steve looks at Katie, eyebrow raising.

Katie: Ok, maybe I can be a little incecisive....but tha wasn’t really the point of the...you know what, never mind. Next...

4. Where do you usually eat your meals?

Steve: It depends. If its breakfast or lunch dring the week then it’s usual eaten on the go whilst we’re getting the kids sorted or I’m in between classes...but dinner, well we always try and sit down. And at weekends we always eat at the table with the kids. 

5. Favorite meal: breakfast, lunch, or dinner?

Katie: Dinner. During the week Steve and I eat a little bit later than the kids so we have that time to ourselves just to decompress and talk about our day, have a bit of us time...and at weekend we’re al together so I love it.

Steve: I love it for all those reasons, and also because she’s the best damned cook on the planet.

6. Most embarrassing habit?

Katie: Erm...

Steve: It’s pretty embarassing when you throw a Brat tantrum about something.. Katie: I don’t do that in public.

Steve: Bullshit. I refer you to the whole car purchasing situation a few years ago.

Katie: Jamie was only a baby...I was hormonal.

Steve: Hormonal my ass, you were being a brat.

Katie:  Whatever.  Yours is definately the need to stand with your hands on your hips and give someone your Captain look, especially when it’s someone you have never met before but they just happen to be doing something to piss you off.

Steve:  I make no apologies for this.  People can be idiots.

7. Chocolate or fruity candy?

Both at same time: Chocolate.

Steve: Preferably British.  Cadbury’s to be specific. I got a taste for it when I was in London during the war.

Katie: He has a secret stash he hides from the kids...it’s great to blackmail him with.

8. Soft or hard tacos?

Steve: Soft

Katie: Hard

Steve: Although hard ones always remind me of when you went into labour with Jamie.  We were making them for lunch and you had a contraction and crushed one...

Katie: Oh yeah, maybe soft in that case...because that was painful.  And then I went throguh that another 3 times.Which is your fault.

Steve: I take full responsibility, yes. 

9. Worst way to break up a fight?

Katie: Walk into the middle of it and say “Prove it, put the hamer down...” Steve: sighs, That was one time.

Katie: And it levelled a forest.

Steve: Did it work?

Katie: Hmmm, suppose so.

Steve: There you go ...but if its a fight between us, the I can think of the best way to break it up...

Katie : grinning, yeah...that’ s pretty funny. Or the worst one is telling you you’re in the spare room.

Steve: Yeah...that sucks.

10. Best thing to say in an elevator of strangers?

Katie: Putting on deep voice “Before we get started, does anyone wanna get out?”

Steve: Sighing  I wish I had some smart reply to that bu I don’t...

Katie: No, you just threw us out the side of the damned thing from 14 storeys up

Steve: 19

Katie: That’s...that’s not better Steve.

11. Any hidden talents?

Steve: Not so much hidden really but I’m not a bad artist and Katie’s singing and piano playing is off the scale.

Katie: Steve’s really good at DIY. Like, brilliantly good.  And also pretty savvy with technology all things considered...

Steve: When you say all things considered you mean because I’m like 112

Katie: Actually, you’re like 127 if you count the 15 years you spent back in time after putting the stones back.

Steve: hesitates I thought you said they didn’t count because I didn’t spend them with you.

Katie: They don’t, but they still happened.

12. Socks or bare feet around the house?

Steve: Socks

Katie: Bare feet

Steve: Neither of those protect you from standing on lego, which for the record, I reckon has to be a pain worse than chilbirth.

Katie:  Seriously? You’re going there?

Steve: Ok, maybe that’s a slight exaggeration but it still hurts like hell.

13: Favorite board game?

Katie: Monopoly. Its funny to watch Emmy and Jamie getting really agitated and annoyed. The younger 3 don’t really get it, Rori just likes to help Steve by sorting all his money into piles and suggesting things he can spend it on.

Steve: Namely tutus and tap shoes...she still wants to be chorus girl.

14:Heat on or keep it cold with lots of layers?

Katie: Oh my God. Steve is a nightmare as he runs hotter than any of us, so whilst we want the fire or heat on he’s complaining he’s boiling hot all the time. Our bedroom is like an ice block.

Steve: Doll, I’ve been in an ice block. Trust me, our bedroom is like a furnace in comparison.

Katie: It si nice though, like sleeping with a big hot  water bottle.

15: At what age did you first have alcohol?

Katie: I’m sure Tony gave me beer when I was 15 or something but the first time I ever got drunk was aged 17. I went to a keg party at one of my friends and I was aboslutely shit faced. Tony held my hair back whilst i puked my guts upt for a good hour once I was home. I had the hangover to end all hangovers the next day and he cracked JARVIS up to maximum volume just to teach me a lesson.

Steve:  I think I was 18. Me and Buck drank a bottle of his dad’s home made hooch...yeah, it didn’t take me much to get me drunk back then and I was very, very illl. Ma thought I had a fever. Mr Barnes thought it was hilarious, but still gave us both a slap upside th head...

16. What’s the most amount of money you’ve spent on a single item of clothing?

Katie: I would say my wedding dress, but Tony bought that for me, so it would probably the the dress I wore to the  SIP Launch for The Color Of Revenge...that cost...well it was in the tens of thousands

Steve:  Blinking How much?

Katie: You don’t need to know.

17. What do you typically wear to formal events?

Steve: Whatever my gal tells me to.

Katie: And you always look great Soldier.

18. Favorite memory?

Steve: Oooh, other than when we adopted Emmy or the kids were born, I’d have to say when Katie agreed to be my wife. I’ll never forget that day as long as I live.

Katie: Me neither, not least becase I got my camero...

Steve: rolls eyes.

Katie:  Joking aside, yeah the engagement sticks in my mind but I think it was when you finally kissed me for the first time. I knew then that I was never gonna let you go.

Steve: yeah...that...ok you know what this is an impossible question after being together for so long.

19. Favorite shoes?

Katie: I have a pair of sparkly gold Jimmy Choo stilettoes that I’ve had for ages. They’re gorgeous, with ankle straps and pointed toes. I’ve had them for almost  17 years but they’re amazin.

Steve: grins. Yeah, they’re my favourite shoes too...

Katie: Pervert.

Steve: I’m not even gonna deny it. Those shoes ALWAYS stay on if I can help it.

20. Most dangerous thing you’ve ever done?

Both start to laugh hysterically.

Steve: Where do we start?

Katie: New York, Washington, Sokovia, Lagos, Leipzig, Siberia, Wakanda, Upstate and proablly a whole load of other places in between could be good places Stevie.

Steve: Yeah, this...I can’t answer this. 

21. Most embarrassing thing your parents have caught you doing?

Katie: I was 7 when my parents died but taking Tony as surrogate, I reckon him catching us in the kitchen when we were...you know, and he didn’t actually know about us has got to be up there.

Steve: Yeah, that was pretty bad... although my Ma once caught me and Bucky measuring our... looks down.

Katie: splutters What? You never told me this?

Steve: Well its not exactly somethign that crops up in conersation sweethheart? “Oh by the way, once when we were 16 me and Buck compared sizes...” Katie: Blinks. Boys are strange. So who had the biggest...

Steve: Next question...

22. Last time you had an orgasm?

Both grin.

Steve: Last night 

Katie: I can confrim this...there’s not many nights to be fair where we don’t...

23: Celebrity Crushes?

Katie: grins. Does Bucky Barnes count?

Steve: Fuck you.

24: Makeup or natural?

Katie: Normally I just wear a bit of tinted moisturiser and mascara, now I have the kids anyway. I don’t have time to really do my face in a morning. I’ll make the effort when we go out though...

Steve: You don’t need it honey.

Katie: Awww thanks baby.

Steve: Although that red lipstick you wear, the bright red..yeah...I like that... grins wickedly and winks It smears well...

Katie flushes: dirt bag

25. Favorite season?

Katie: Summer. Growing up in Malibu I like the sun and warmth.

Steve: Fall. It’s an artists dream...the colours and textures are amazing to work with

Katie: Fall is rubbish. Everything dies and it’s a bit shit.

Steve: But you make apple pie and get to snuggle in my sweaters.

Katie: literally the only 2 things good about it. 

26. Are you a competitive person?

Katie snorts and looks at Steve

Steve: I’m not even going to deny it. 

Katie: He even refuses to let the kids win a games sometimes.

Steve: Important life lessons, Doll. 

27. First pet you’ve ever owned?

Katie: My goldfish Flounder, the one that Tony replaced about 8 times. Other than that it was my Turkey Marv, he was ace.

Steve: I didn’t have any growing up so mine would be Lucky. He was a great dog. 

28. Favorite pasta dish?

Steve: Mac and Cheese, specifically Katie’s. It’s amazing.

Katie smiling: Yeah  I like Mac and Cheese, but I also enjoy carbonara.

29. Favorite kind of pizza?

Both: Pepperoni.

Steve: New York Style.

Katie: I like Deepdish every now and then.

Steve: It’s not the same...

Katie: well dur, that’s the point.

Steve: Yeah, not convinced. 

30. Lots of acquaintances or a handful of close friends?

Katie: Handful of close friends, without a doubt. They become an extension of your family, you know. All of us in the Avengers were close and when you have that bond, you’ll do anything for one another.

Steve: Agree completely. When you’re close like we all are then it makes everything that little bit easier, knowing that whatever you’re facing you’ve got each others 6.

31: Something that ruins your appetite?

Katie: Narrows eyes Whenver I see Ross on Tv. Makes me want to puke.

Steve: You really should let that go you know?

Katie: Never. I hold a grudge very well.

Steve: Don’t I know it.

32. Night out with a bunch of friends in public or night in with one friend having deep conversations?

Steve: I’ve never been one for big nights out. I enjoy the odd one now and then but, I’d much rather curl up on the sofa or round the firepit with Katie or Sam or Bucky with a beer and some decent talk.

Katie: Yeah, at one time I would have said night out hands down, but certianly since having the kids, or even since we started dating, it’s definately change my ideas a little. Some of the nicest nights we’ve had have been spent on the sofa.

Steve grins: yeah...

Katie: And not just because of that....

33. Have you ever told someone you loved them first?

Steve: I’ve only ever told one girl I loved them and she’s sat right here, and I said it first that night...

Katie: smiling Yeah, yeah you did. I wasn’t far behind though, like 3 seconds or something.

34. Have you ever had sex on the first date?

Katie: Does a one night stand count as a first date? Because if so then yes...

Steve: Same.

Katie: Lottie?

Steve: Storm?

Both look at one another,  teasingly.

Katie: Ok next question...

35. Heroes or villains?

Steve: Some people might say there’s a fine line between the two. Katie: Oh here he goes, getting all Captain Philosophical again...look, everyone knows we were suposedly the heroes Steve, and to be fair we saved the world a fair few times, we were even fighting in the shadows during the Nomad years.

Steve: I know, I know...

36. How many plates can you eat at a buffet?

Steve: You know I’ve never actually counted.

Katie: You did 20 at the last brunch we went to.

Steve: 20...that’s...impressive.

Katie: smirking Bucky did 22

Steve: sighs Of course he did...

37: Favorite dessert?

Steve: Apple pie, preferably Katie’s

Katie: Pecan pie. Hands down. 

38 Would you rather watch a TV show or a movie?

Steve: Ooh, that’s..i suppose it depends. I do like a good TV series, especially if we can curl up and binge watch once the kids are going to bed but I do have fond memories of us working through the films on my list...

Katie: smiling, yeah we had a lot of fun. Still

39. What’s your favorite compliment to give?

Steve: I love telling Katie how beautiful she is, and what a wonderful mother she is...all of which is true.

Katie: I like to remind Steve that he’s my Steve Rogers, not Captain America...because he is. And he’s the most amazing man on the planet, with or withouth that serum coursing through his veins. Which is what makes him the best dad the kids could wish for.

40. What’s the luckiest thing that’s ever happened to you?

Steve: smiling,  she’s sat right next to me.

Katie: smiling , back at ya soldier.

[your-brilliant-lady-m]

South Korean music industry at a glance: an outsider perspective

I watched one particular AMV last week. The song used for the video was “I’m afraid” by Korean rock band DAY6. I was pleasantly surprised as someone who values lyrics in song first and foremost. The music itself was great. I’ll listen to their songs again. It’s a nice fit for my music taste. Naturally, YouTube’s algorithm decided that I’m a fan of everything Korean after 1 video and started spamming my recommendations with k-pop songs, documentaries and everything in-between. 

I watched a couple of videos, listened to some songs and discovered fascinating patterns. So, I went down to the comment section. And it was rather interesting experience, should I say? The concept of entertainment industry in South Korea simply begged to be explored more after this. I dug deeper and visited Tumblr k-pop tags and briefly glanced upon Instagram and Twitter. And, oh...

I am a big picture person and I enjoy both studying and creating systems. This one was particularly fun to explore. I discovered a lot of new things for myself. Perhaps, you can discover something new for yourself too or take a step back and look at this from a new angle. 

Disclaimer: it’s impossible not to offend someone on Tumblr, so keep that in mind. That being said, I do NOT intend to insult of offend anyone. It’s just a little research done for fun, because I love research with a purpose. This post is NOT A HATE post. No hate intended for fans, artists or other people involved. It’s meant to be a discussion, nothing more and nothing less. If it sounds like hate, it’s just my sarcastic sense of humour.

Content Warning: I mention suicide, death, depression, rape in a couple of sentences. There’s nothing major or graphic, but it’s there. 

In this long post I decided to share with you my opinion, a so-called outsider perspective, on the world of music entertainment industry in South Korea and people involved in it on different levels. I use the word “outsider” mainly because, that’s exactly what I am in this case, as someone who is in no way involved in k-pop community. I can’t name you a single band or their members. I don’t know any solo artist and can’t neither sing nor name you any song. 

And to be completely honest, I don’t think I will set my foot into k-pop fan-circles ever again after everything I saw. 

Think of this as “In this essay I will...” meme, except there’s an actual essay.

As far as I know, in South Korea “k-pop” refers to all music produced in SK, including solo artists, various bands, singers-songwriters. It doesn’t even have to be pop music. Koreans include in this definition all genres of music. However, around the world “k-pop” means primarily music made by idol groups and bands marketed for children, teenagers and younger people. In this post I use the latter definition, because that’s how most people understand “k-pop” in other countries. Therefore, my statements, opinions and conclusions here would concern only idol music. 

The music industry in South Korea is heavily influenced by culture and traditions of the country, just like all things are. And there’s nothing wrong with that. After all, different backgrounds are what makes people so interesting and unique. However, when combined with consumer mindset, desire to generate profit at any cost and fast-paced nature of modern life these neutral cultural elements could produce something concerning, and it can lead to disastrous consequences. 

1. Idol

These people are called artists, musicians, singers, bands, groups, performers. In South Korea and in Japan, however, people call them Idols or Stars. I’ve also seen Muses, Princes and Queens. Interesting, isn’t it? The terminology used to describe these musicians in South Korea is one of the key elements in this whole entertainment system. You’ll see why.

But who or what is an idol exactly? Let’s take a basic definition from Wikipedia.

“In the practice of religion, a cult image or devotional image is a human-made object that is venerated or worshipped for the deity, person, spirit or daemon ... that it embodies or represents. In several traditions, including the ancient religions of Egypt, Greece and Rome, and modern Hinduism, cult images in a temple may undergo a daily routine of being washed, dressed, and having food left for them. Processions outside the temple on special feast days are often a feature. Religious images cover a wider range of all types of images made with a religious purpose, subject, or connection. In many contexts "cult image" specifically means the most important image in a temple, kept in an inner space, as opposed to what may be many other images decorating the temple.

The term idol is often synonymous with worship cult image. In cultures where idolatry is not viewed negatively, the word idol is not generally seen as pejorative, such as in Indian English.”

Cambridge Dictionary defines idol as follows:

And here’s the definition from Oxford Dictionary: 

This is a centrepiece of this tapestry. Surely, you have noticed by now what these definitions have in common. 

Idol = a cult image of a god, a deity 

By calling these musicians “idols” industry makes society and audience treat them in certain way, namely as gods. What characteristics do gods possess? They are beautiful, talented, funny, confident and graceful, blessed by eternal youth of immortality. Gods have no flaws, they do not bleed, they are above human concerns. They are an embodiment of perfection. They are stars, you could not reach. 

But real people are not like that. They can be sad and angry, insecure. People don’t have perfectly symmetrical faces. They can’t dance in sync without preparation. They can’t sing like angels at any given moment throughout the day.

What happens when idols accidentally reveal their humanity? What happens when people see, that they make mistakes and do stupid things, that they need to train hard to appear graceful on stage? 

I will tell you. And it’s not pretty. But, first, let’s look at other elements of this system. 

2. Y/N and Self-insert fantasy

Aside from the music, K-pop sells the self-insert fantasy to the audience. It’s carefully arranged to appear real, where the cracks are masked and every word is scripted. The reality is so vivid that one doesn’t even have to use imagination all that much, because all scenarios and decorations already exist. Countless interviews for TV and magazines, fan meetings, talk shows, reality shows made sure people are privy to all juicy details of personal lives and opinions of musicians. And also one word - merchandise. Some of that merch made me question my life choices. Some of it is, ah, creepy or has weird vibes. All of this provides plenty of material for people to work with. Fans can effortlessly imagine themselves beside their idols or even in their place. 

In a highly competitive society, where people throw themselves into studying and work since young age, forming deep and lasting connections with others is very hard, sometimes impossible. As a result, people long to have a group of close friends with similar interests, a loving partner who would cherish them endlessly. People want to be rewarded for their backbreaking efforts to succeed by the carefree life of fame and music, everlasting friendships and love. And in a way you can’t really blame them for his. 

Does this dream life sound familiar? We are looking at K-pop bands here. It doesn’t really matter if their members don’t always get along or that they can live in debt, that fame is fickle and adoring fans can tear your self-confidence to shreds. Audience wants the glamour of fantasy and the industry is more than happy to cater to these desires. 

Perhaps, knowing that even for idols this fantasy is sometimes unattainable makes the whole set up feel just a little cruel. 

3. Fans, stans and fandom culture

We’ve already established earlier that idols are gods in the eyes of people and listed traits they must possess. So, what else do gods need to exist? Worshippers. Because a cult is worth nothing without its followers. Gods need a group of people to worship them and spread their beliefs. The role of worshippers is performed by a fans in this case. 

Apparently, there is a running joke that girl groups need to win a general public popularity and boy bands need a big passionate fandom. It seems to be true according to my observations. 

In k-pop fandom people use the word “stan” to state that they like or support particular group. Now, I am sure everyone here knows that in other fandoms, dedicated to movies, shows, books and games there’s an important distinction between being a “fan” and a “stan”. What is it? 

A fan is someone who likes a ship or character, creates and/or consumes fandom content, supports certain ideas, discusses things they enjoyed and disliked, criticises canon. Stans, however, are a different breed. They engage in all typical fandom activities, but their support and enjoyment becomes obsession. Stans believe their favourite characters and ships are immune to criticism, that they are superior no matter what others say. Stans start shipping wars, send anon hate, death threats over fictional characters and hurt real people. Stans are considered toxic fans. And majority of normal civilised people don’t like them and try their best to let stans hang out in their echo chamber by themselves. 

In other fandoms and communities, to be a fan means to love, support and enjoy something, while to stan means to obsess over and hyperfixate on these same things. Words “I stan” rarely mean “I support” for most people, and if they do mean that, it’s only used in a joking manner (”We stan procrastination legend!”, “I stan our miscommunication kings”).

Everywhere else “stan” has only negative connotations, except in k-pop. But what has changed? What’s the difference? Why do international fans scoff at “shipper stans” and then turn around calling themselves “stans of X k-pop group” at the same time? Does it make you wonder? 

And this is another core theme of k-pop, in my opinion. In fandom where stan = obsession = support, you can see interesting patterns. 

Fandom loves their flawless gods. But watching them from afar is not enough for some people, because unlike deities in different religions, these gods live among us. People are very much aware of that. Industry has created a cult and laid the groundwork for worshippers to express their adoration in every way including personal contact. And who wouldn’t want to meet their god? Who wouldn’t want to know more about them or tell them how much you love them? In talk shows and fan meetings there is only so much one can do after all.

People desire to know more, to have more so much that their obsession transforms into concerning stalker tendencies. These crazy individuals follow idols, stalk them on social media, in hotels, research flight numbers, bribe security. Musicians were attacked and poisoned. I strongly suspect there were cases of rape that no one knows about. There is even a special term for these fans - “sasaeng”. 

Is there a definition for stalkers of actors or musicians in western world? No, I’m pretty sure there isn’t. They are just called “invasive/obsessive fans” or “stalkers”.

Also, there are sasaeng memes. Yeah, you heard that right. I enjoy some classy dark humour as much as the next person, but there is a fine line between normal and questionable. 

Back to the topic of stalkers. Do you realise how disturbing that is? Such behaviour is so common that there is a term for it. You create a fandom-cult, encourage people to worship k-pop idols as gods and then act surprised when members of said cult become fanatics and their adoration becomes obsession.

And it’s so easy to step on this slippery road. The system makes it ridiculously easy. Lines begin to blur. How much is too much? Where do you draw the line? 

While sasaeng fans engage in extreme real-life obsession, people online aren’t that far off, to be honest. I’ve seen it all: imagines, headcanons, fanfiction, real-person shipping, reactions. Real person shipping is a controversial topic. Some people support it, others don’t. I suppose I’m among those who don’t get it. I’m not exactly against it, but I find it strange. Mainly because it’s based on assumptions made by fans about personalities and behaviour of real people. 

Assumptions. Dear me! K-pop fandom has this thing with video compilations. I’ve never seen this phenomenon being so widespread in any other community or fandom. Basically people edit together a collection of short clips from talk-shows, interviews, Instagram stories, some YouTube videos, etc and then proceed to analyse every gesture, word, facial expression of idols and provide both audio and on-screen commentary. These videos and many other forms of similar analysis allow people to imagine what kind of personalities idols have, what kind of life do they live. It’s the source material for fanfiction, imagines and headcanons. 

But it’s not real. It’ll never be real. It’s an illusion, an image, a stage persona. They fall in love with a face and made up personality. And I think that when people create this content they can forget this. Fans can develop certain emotional dependence and unhealthy attitudes in the long run. In some YouTube comments even supportive and encouraging words sound whiny and obsessive. And semantics of being a “stan” of certain group or individual doesn’t help. 

4. Industry, companies and liars 

At last we arrive at the most important aspect of music entertainment industry - its creators.

Have you seen “The Road to El Dorado”? It’s one of my all time favourites. It has iconic characters, adult jokes that I didn’t get as a child and iconic soundtrack. I’ll quote “It’s Tough To Be A God” a lot here. 

In South Korea music industry is a factory, the production line to be exact. This kind of set up affects everything in the grand scheme of things. Companies and agencies play the role of training centres and record labels. And there are so many of them that a whole new scamming system developed based around fake idol agencies. It implies that there are people who fall for offers of these agencies and continue to do so. I suspect that victims must pay a fortune upfront before they realise their mistake. Are there any kind of legal protection against such scams? How can people verify the authenticity? Because a well masked scam can exist for a long time before someone discovers it and calls them out on their nonsense. 

As far as I understand legal companies work like this. After high school, which is often focused on performing arts (and private schools can get away with using talents of students for personal gain, which is totally not surprising), young people can audition for an agency and become an idol in training or idol-trainee. And passing audition is hard. But good recommendations can help, connections too. 

During training you don’t get paid. Only a few companies pay aspiring musicians. People can spend years in training and don’t debut. But rent, necessities, clothing and food (not that you need much of it, but more on that later) cost a lot. Where do you get the money to live then? Support from parents, one or two part time jobs at most and bank loans. Surprise! We found an unexpected (just kidding, it’s very obvious) party, who reaps benefits from the system. 

You need skill to be an idol. Natural talent helps too. The more skills you have, the cheaper and faster your training is. To level up your game you attend classes every month offered by your agency, which are not cheap (dance classes range from 400$ to 1000$ per month, sometimes more). There are four main categories in evaluation process: vocals, rapping, dancing and visuals. Idols are multitaskers, to have a chance on stage one must be perfect at everything. And people are ready to invest thousands of dollars into their kids training so that they could have a chance in entertainment industry. South Korea thrives on revenue k-pop industry generates every day.

Let’s pause here for a second and think about what kind of people come to these agencies. The answer is easy. People who have a dream, a desire, a real goal. You don’t wake up one day and decide to become a k-pop idol. Sometimes people get invited by agencies (after prior acting, modelling career or any other form of exposure). These people are usually very young. Some start straight after high school, some after university, but 25 years old is considered a late start. Compare that to western musicians who start singing at any age and still become famous. 

But why this age limit? Because idols are eternally young. So that in public eye musicians are remembered as 20 year old gods. People would listen to their music and imagine a young attractive face. Career in k-pop is short, it lasts 5-7 years, rarely longer than that. It’s even less than modelling or acting can offer. And professional sportsmen retire in their late 30′s. Some play longer, but usually, that’s it.

If you live in Los Angeles and say that you want to be an actor or performer, no one would bat an eye. It’s like saying that you want to be an engineer or accountant. Similarly, in South Korea becoming an k-pop musician is a real career. Because part of the self insert fantasy that the industry sells is the idea that anyone can be an idol. It’s easy after all. Anyone can pass auditions and become a trainee. A trainee with no guarantee of debut. But one should never underestimate the power of idol-dream. After all, idea is the most resilient parasite.   

“My friends started training in kindergarten. They have wanted to become idols since young”

“A lot of young kids get interested in Korean music” 

A 6-year old child sees the performance of k-pop group for the first time on TV. Let’s say it’s a girl. She is enraptured and decides that she will be like that too someday. She grows up, while being part of the fandom, just like all idols are in one way or another and whose fan-obsession transforms into desire to succeed. Her parents spend time and money to find her tutors, to fund dancing and singing classes. Perhaps in high school this girl decides to fix the shape of her eyes and make nose straighter. She trains hard and passes the auditions in her dream agency. And during training this girl faces the reality of behind the scenes life in music industry.

“Why are you crying? I’m not even pushing you”

“How many times have I told you? The rest are doing it perfectly”

“She is dancing like an elementary school student“

“I watched your performance as a spectator who bought a ticket to your concert. I want a refund“

“You make my ears hurt. I don’t want to listen at all”

“Listening to you was tiring”

“I’ll kick you out instead. You won’t debut”

“I thought I was going to die. That’s how determined I was” 

While I do understand that keeping a high quality standards in media industry is important, there are more productive and healthy ways to motivate someone to improve and be more passionate, you know? Constantly insulting people with sadistic glee and putting them down at every opportunity or calling them ugly to their face doesn’t do much. 

Do you think that children know about this? Do they know about soulless teachers and belittling managers? Do they know about friends who are really your competition, so you shouldn’t get attached? Do they know about living in debt? Do they know any of this? No, I don’t think they do. 

Children dream about the stage, about the sea of lights and crowds who chant your names. They want adoring fans and photoshoots. They want to appear on TV and magazine covers. Teenagers want the thrill of performance, they want to share their music and dancing with others. 

“I don’t know how many times I cried alone”

The truth is cruel. But they won’t give up easily even if it means sleeping 4-5 hours and consuming no more than 500 calories per day. Because giving up means that your whole life was a lie. One can’t afford not to be good enough. Giving up means admitting that all efforts and money your family invested into your dream were in vain. It means losing face before your family and friends - a fate worse than death. Imagine living this idol dream and building your whole future around it and then being told that you’ll never debut because of the circumstances outside of your control or something minor, like face shape or 1 kg of weight that your body refuses to lose. It can break you. Especially if you are like 18 or something. 

5. “And who am I to bridle if I'm forced to be an idol If they say that I'm a God, that's what I am”

“I don’t think there’s anything a tough as being a trainee in Korea”

Once you are a trainee at the agency your personal life does not belong to you anymore. You can’t go out without permission of the agency. You phone is taken away. Your diet and weight are monitored. Bad habits are not allowed (no smoking, drinking or drugs). Oh! I think I found the good thing in the system! Unfortunately, it won’t last. Trainees can’t date or meet with family without permission of agency. Dating is very taboo. Even established idols can’t openly date. 

Why is that? Because gods can’t belong to anyone. Their lives are property of the fandom. Because openly dating idols destroy the self-insert fantasy. There was a former idol girl who dated another musician. She was called a whore by her fans, her loving and adoring stans. You might know who I am talking about. Would you call an American actor or singer a prostitute for dating someone?

Trainees sign the contract. And how can a young person straight out of school or university know much about what makes a good contract in entertainment industry or what makes a good contract in general? Even if you do understand the terms fully you would still sign it because if you have come so far, you can’t let your dream slip this easily. There isn’t a choice. Not really. If you want to debut, you will agree to anything.

What about life after debut? You have to pay off your loans. And company takes 60-70% of your group’s earnings. Artists themselves get 30-40% and split it between themselves. K-pop groups have from 5 to 10 members or more than that. Each person gets less than 6%. Idols are not filthy rich. They are not. These earnings are practically nothing compared to the work you have put into this. 

Idols are musicians, who often don’t even write their own songs, music or create choreography. But if public doesn’t like the song and musical number the company created, they blame idols for the failure. Such an amazing logic we see right here. But people say that sharing music is the best part of idol life. But whose music? 

Models on catwalk are not there to demonstrate their physical beauty, they are blank canvas for works of clothing designers. Same with k-pop musicians. They act like puppets in a way, whose faces and voices are used to show audience someone’s music and songs. Some groups do write their own music and lyrics and it’s nice to know that. But those, who don’t are rather unfortunate. It’s a nice tool of psychological control and pressure for an agency. They can hold it over group and use the following rhetoric: “We gave you everything! Why can’t you follow the simple instructions” or “Where would you be without us? It’s not even your music!”

I called k-pop industry a factory. That’s true. Dozens of people become trainees every year. These talented young people are fully prepared to do anything to achieve their goal. They are ready to practice until they collapse, starve themselves and pour themselves into every song. Companies know that. Tell me why would they value their idols as individuals, as people, as human beings if they always have a replacement? Why bother with mental health of their artists if next year they could have a fresh set of people, who are younger and prettier? Why try to improve relationships inside groups if you could fire any member and replace them within a month or two?

In western countries famous bands have different stories. Some were friends since high school, who played in bars and during festivals and then they were noticed by some representative of label company, who offered them a contract. Some groups were formed by like-minded people who bonded and decided to share their music with the world. There are many stories, but ultimately the have one thing in common. Bands in the West often form themselves. These people had time to bond, connect, discover each other, solve some disagreements and learn to work around their differences. 

K-pop groups are formed by their agencies. They are their property in a way. Company selects the best and puts together these total strangers, appoints the leader with marketable face and personality and then expects them to work together like a well-oiled machine. No one has time to bond during training, because other people are you competition, not friends. And then you must learn to work as a team and be best friends on camera for the audience to support the self-insert fantasy. It’s no wonder that k-pop groups don’t get along sometimes. And every member knows that they are replaceable. It doesn’t help in forming connections. Groups can’t just terminate contract and go to work with another agency. I heard it happens sometimes, but it’s not a done thing. Unlike in other countries where bands just sign the deal with a different label and release their music under their name if they don’t like the old conditions. 

“It's tough to be a God But if you get the people's nod Count your blessings, keep them sweet, that's our advice Be a symbol of perfection Be a legend, be a cult Take their praise, take a collection As the multitudes exalt Don a supernatural habit We'd be crazy not to grab it So sign up two new Gods for paradise”

But is it really a paradise?

Idols are expected to act cute, to match personalities created for them by fans or media. They have to act according to the concept of their group. They have to be a symbol of perfection: skinny, single and with a face perfected by surgery. They are allowed to mess up, but only in a cute way. They can break down and cry, but only if it’s “aesthetic”.

Weight issues are a separate topic. Sometimes I wonder whether managers in companies understand how weight loss or human body in general works. To be honest, I think that scales in agencies are rigged. And only managers know that. I know it can be done from personal experience. Some beach resorts tweak their scales and make them show 4-6 kg less than actual weight, so people wouldn’t get upset if they gain some. There is no way a girl as tall as I am (173 cm) could weigh like 47-50 kg and be able to perform complex choreography on stage and sing without being out of breath, visit the gym on a regular basis and generally function as a normal human without fainting every other day.

“I developed a lot of eating disorders”

“I think I consumed about 300 calories today“

“Someone, please, trim the fat off her arms”

If you grow up thinking of idols as gods and then, when you become one of them you think that you must act as one too. But being an easily replaceable god is a heavy burden. The industry, companies and audience want you to be perfect, to always be on your best behaviour. And the thought of not being good enough or divine enough terrifies you, because stans have no mercy (black ocean concept is the most stupid thing ever by the way). This kind of pressure can destroy even the most resilient. And it does. 

Almost everyone knows that situation with mental health in South Korea is not the best to put it lightly. In many ways it’s a cultural thing. But in k-pop mental health issues are treated with even less care. Gods are not supposed to be depressed or suicidal. They are not supposed to have fears or insecurities, can’t be upset or angry. They try hard to be this deity, this image. So, even when they realise they need professional help or even a friend to talk to, they either won’t seek said help or reach out only to be met with silence. Some agencies disapprove or forbid therapy altogether. 

Sometimes fandom becomes self-aware.

“Don’t forget that idols are people too!”

“Your favourite idols are running out of breath just to keep you entertained“

“They are humans, who have feelings!”

Oh, but here’s the thing, my friend. The industry doesn’t want you to think of them as people. Companies and media repeatedly reinforce the idea that they are not people, they are your idols. And strangely enough, the audience supports this idea. People continue to call them idols, developing worshiping tendencies in the process, imitate them, scrutinise their flaws and triumphs. Because, you know, only “real and ordinary humans” can have flaws, not “idols”.

So people who say “they are human too” and people who say “wow, this concert was amazing, but vocals in the beginning were so off-key, I simply can’t” are one and the same.

This thought process would have been funny if it wasn’t so disappointing. But that’s just my observation.

And here’s another thing about sexualisation. I said before how appearances are everything, marketable face and body could drastically improve your chances to succeed. Companies know about this too and concepts and aesthetics of groups are designed accordingly. Girls are dressed in skimpy outfits, their dances are unnecessary suggestive, they wear heavy make up and try to have “mature” vibes. Boys don’t avoid such objectification either: suits, tight pants and dress shirts along with make up and hairstyle to give audience a promise of the things to come. Grown adults are not supposed to lust after 15-17 year olds. You can’t just create a sexy stage persona for teenagers. Do you remember my earlier words about creepy merch? Yeah. All of it neatly plays into the self-insert fantasy and encourages obsessive behaviour. 

This happens in western countries too. In some way that’s understandable. Beautiful and sexy image with a hint of innocence attracts more people and sells, because it caters to one of the base human instincts. But some things make your skin crawl. 

Sponsorships are another topic. Some k-pop bands seek out sponsors to provide financial aid and cover expenses, when earnings are not enough. Sometimes these sponsorships are fine, perfectly civil. But sometimes it’s a prostitution. Girl groups receive money and provide sexual favours to their patrons. It’s a way for the group to gain financial support and even find new opportunities in the industry. Companies can encourage such deals. Let that sink in for a moment. 

6. “Any advice to those who want to become a k-pop idol?”

A lot of former idols and trainees have similar responses to this question. 

“I don’t want to discourage anyone, but think twice”

“You only see the glamorous side, but don’t see all the hard work that goes into it”

“It’s not what you think”

“They think ‘Since I am good looking and can sing and dance really well, maybe I should become an idol?’, but there is much more to it“

“They think it’s something that is easy and will keep their family set for life financially”

And this implies that most people don’t know what kind of lifestyle k-pop stars truly have, despite the amount of information available online about “behind the scenes” proceedings.

7. Moving on

I am a practical person and every decision I make is subjected to scrutiny. And after seeing everything I can't help but wonder whether idols believe it's truly worth it. What keeps the industry alive is the idol-dream, the wilful ignorance of its reality and youthful idealism, the beautiful naïve belief that it'll get better, even if it never does in the end.

Sure no one would ever admit it out loud, because it's one of those things you never say on camera, no matter how sincere you have to be. It's the matter of professionalism after all, and idols have it spades. And also, because admitting this would equal admitting that you spent your best years doing something you both loved and hated, admitting that this was a mistake.

When you grow up in a society where appearances matter the most, where saving face and being polite is more important than staying true to yourself, where individuality is tolerated only to a certain point, it takes a lot of courage to admit that you need a break. I greatly respect those who decided that idol lifestyle is not for them and moved on.

8. Conclusion

To sum up, I hope you enjoyed my small research and this perspective, since you have read it all the way to the end.  

You have noticed that entertainment industry is an intricate system and its every component makes sure nothing changes. Companies have power over idols and audience, fandom has power over idols and their careers, and musicians themselves have fame and their music, but not always the promised fortune or happiness. 

It’s important to understand the big picture to draw your own conclusions and encourage positive and heathy attitudes in fandoms. Being open minded and allowing people to make mistakes and live their lives the way they want to is a part of being a decent person. People don’t owe anything to others. Art is about sharing your thoughts and feelings, promoting ideas and spreading beauty. It’s not always about money. And I think that this is what k-pop lacks as an industry. It turned dreams and human need for self-expression into business. Here everything is turned into a product. Everything idols touch can be sold, sometimes literally. Industry created problems, which can’t be solved anymore, because doing so would topple the system. And I find it tragic. Trapped in an endless chase after perfection creators of k-pop forgot that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. 

If you take a look at comment sections and posts on different platforms, what will you see? What kind of things resonate with audience? What makes people laugh and cry? When people start to appreciate the substance?

“Everyone needs to hear this song in their darkest moments”

“Thank you for your music!”

“They always deliver! These guys can’t make a bad song!”

“It inspired me to write again!”

“Their songs brought me and my sister together once again”

“This is what happens when you let groups write their own music - they make incredible things”

“They really are legends of k-pop! I love that they are not afraid to show their inner strength”

“Stay strong! You rock!”

I believe that the answer is quite simple: when it’s real, sincere. It’s all about the message you choose to send to your audience, because only superficial things cause obsession. When you say that the sparkly façade is all that matters, then that’s the only thing people will ever care about. Your audience will never give a damn about the meaning behind dancing, music or lyrics, if you tell them that performance is more important. No one would praise WHAT k-pop idols sing, instead they would prefer wasting breath to criticize HOW they sing or look or move. 

I dare the k-pop industry to prove people that it’s not just about looks or perfection, or laser shows, or being a branding machine. Prove to your fans that k-pop artists are also passionate people with big dreams and talent, who love every moment of their job, who live and inspire, who are human just like us and whose humanity is real!

Do it, you cowards!

And now, I’m finished. I can hear the raging crowd of k-pop fandom in the distance, which means it’s time to hide. See you some other time! 

[star-spangled-steve]

His New Partner

Chapter 24: The Last Night Of Freedom

Series Masterlist

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 3402

Warnings: Smut, vaginal sex, oral sex, fingering, nudity, Daddy!Kink, Dom!Steve, sub!Reader, dirty talk, cussing, alcohol, implications of female strippers.

A/N: Just so you know, Y/F/N means Your Friend’s Name and Y/C/N means Your Cousin’s Name; both female in this case. Though if you aren’t close with any cousins, you can just imagine another friend. Enjoy this chapter!

“May your bachelorette party be filled with and fun, love, laughter, and most importantly, lots and lots of liquor.” Natasha spoke with a smirk before shouting “To Y/N!” as a closer to her Maid of Honour speech, or what was at least a shorter version. The real one would take place in exactly a week, but instead of being in front of five other ladies, it would be in front of about two hundred wedding guests.

The small circle of women all cheered and clinked their glasses together, repeating “To Y/N!” with huge smiles before tipping their drinks back.

A group of people from a table nearby started to clap, making the bride-to-be blush and give them a small wave after she finished her sip.

Y/F/N turned around to the look at the supportive Las Vegas bar patrons before facing back to Y/N with a smile. “Ooo, N/N. Looks like that one guy over there recognizes you.” She discretely nudged her head towards the handsome brunette who was sitting right across from them. “He’s cute, you should go for it.”

“Dude, I’m getting married in literally a week.” The actress stated, shaking her head at her friend’s silliness.

Maria smirked. “Still, it’s never too late to call it off.”

Y/C/N laughed at the comment, completely knowing that it was a joke. You’d have to be completely blind to not see the pure love between Steve and Y/N. “Ya, then that way I could have the Captain all for myself.”

“Oh please.” Y/N playfully shook her head. “We all know that Natasha would have next dibs.”

The assassin scoffed in response. “Says who?”

The woman of the hour raised her eyebrows. “You, ‘ya big fiancé kisser!”

The table erupted in gasps and giggles.

“Wait, wait, wait, what happened?” Pepper chimed in.

Maria chuckled. “Oh ya, I heard about that!”

“She kissed Steve when they were in Washington like a year ago.” Y/N explained, pretending to be mad when in reality she was completely over it. “He wasn’t technically my fiancé yet, but you still kissed my boyfriend.”

“It was for a mission! The guys could’ve killed us if we were recognized! I did what I had to do to hide our faces.” Natasha stated, throwing an arm up and down in exaggeration. “How did you even find out? Did Steve tell you?”

“Well, duh!” Y/N said with a laugh. “The man apologized to me like five times.”

“But you kiss a ton of actors all the time for your job.” Pepper pointed out with furrowed eyebrows and tilted her head. “Do you apologize?”

The girl in question nodded her head. “At first, for sure. It was pretty hard for him to deal with, and that’s why he felt so guilty doing the same back to me.” She took another sip of her drink, watching Natasha’s expression from over the rim of her glass. The redhead had an uncharacteristically ashamed look on her face. “Relax, Nat.” Y/N spoke after putting her empty glass down on the glossy wood table. “I’m not really upset, I was just kidding.”

Y/F/N grinned. “So... free dibs to kiss Mr. America then?”

“Absolutely not.”

*****

“To Steve!” Sam cheered, urging the other four guests to repeat him, while the one man of the hour just stood there and beamed.

After taking a long sip of his beer, Clint slapped a hand on the Captain’s shoulder. “May your bachelor party be one to remember.”

“Your last night of freedom.” Rhodes added.

Steve shook his head with a smile. “Well, we can’t exactly call it my last night of freedom. The wedding is a whole seven days away.”

“Still,” Tony cocked his head to the side, “the last night where you’re not tied down to the responsibilities of becoming a husband.“

And it was exactly that. Y/N and the wedding planner had reserved the entire upcoming week to set things up for the ceremony, reception, and photoshoot in between.

“Come on,” Thor, who came back to Earth specifically for these festivities, let out a deep chuckle, “you can tell by the look in this man’s eyes that he truly loves all the weddingly duties.”

Sam nodded. “We all know that Cap would rather be snuggled under the covers with Y/N somewhere than be here with us.”

Steve gave them one of his half grins. “Regardless of what I’d rather or be doing right now,-”

“Or who you’d rather be doing.” Tony interrupted, making the circle of men laugh and the groom-to-be roll his eyes.

“Anyways, I really do appreciate you guys bringing me here.” Steve stated, glancing around their private room at one of Las Vegas’ fanciest bars. It was something that only the big names of the Avengers could book, and the big wallet of Tony Stark could afford.

“The evening’s only beginning though, right, Stark?” Clint waggled his eyebrows up and down with a cheesy smirk.

“Most definitely.” Tony snickered before checking the time on his very expensive watch, seeing that it was now 9:56 at night. “And in a little less than five minutes, the show will finally start.”

Steve furrowed his eyebrows. “What show? I thought we were just going to go back down and gamble some more.”

In order to avoid the man’s eyes, Sam and Tony glanced at their shoes as Clint took a sip of his drink in hopes to hide his smile. Rhodes started to chuckle a little bit, meanwhile Thor was just as confused as the super soldier.

“What did you guys plan?” Steve questioned, suddenly bringing out his special Captain America voice that was only reserved for missions; sometimes the bedroom.

Stark just shrugged mischievously.

“Tony, guys, I swear to Go-”

Roger’s words were interrupted by the sound of squealing women, high heels thumping down the hallway, and a big speaker that was playing some new sensual pop song that he had never heard before.

“You didn’t.” Steve ground his teeth in frustration, eyeing each of his friends. “Whose idea was this?”

Sam sheepishly raised his hand. “It’s my duty as Best Man to give you the best night ever!”

“I thought that we had discuss-”

The double doors suddenly burst open, revealing a large clan of attractive women wearing very, very little clothing. “Oh, Captain!” They called before skipping into the room and circling around the seemingly uncomfortable man.

Steve just sighed as he glanced around the approximately ten pretty faces surrounding him, eyes not daring to stray any lower than their chins. “Oh boy.”

*****

The music of the bar club just seemed to get louder and louder, clouding all of her senses as she took another sip of what was probably her third drink of the evening. Y/N wasn’t exactly drunk yet, but tipsy enough to not really care that she’d been sitting alone for the last half an hour.

Las Vegas was pretty fancy, the girl would have to give it that. The bars were lined with more liquor bottles than she could count, not a finger smudge on any of them, and she was pretty sure that her hotel room was at least 50% marble.

But of course, that could’ve just been Tony’s miraculous planning skills; or Tony’s miraculous stack of money. Y/N couldn’t even imagine what it would cost to bring all twelve people in the wedding party to Las Vegas for the weekend, let alone stay in the two nicest casino hotels in the area.

Yes, two. One for the men, one for the women. Sam and Natasha took great responsibility in their Best Man and Maid of Honour roles, deciding to have the two groups bunk separately, almost ten blocks apart. It was Steve and Y/N’s bachelor and bachelorette parties after all, one of their last nights being two singles. Everyone wanted the pair to spend it to its full extent.

Vibrations coming from her clutch broke Y/N out of her slightly tipsy haze, making the girl take out her cellphone and instantly smile when she saw that it was Steve calling her. “Hello?” She spoke after answering it.

“Hey, sweetheart.” The man said from the other end.

“Honey.” She greeted as she sat up straighter on her barstool, becoming excited at the sound of his voice, “What’s up?”

“Just miss you, that’s all.”

Y/N beamed. They had only been apart for half of a day, and he had already wanted to see her. “I miss you too, Stevie. You having fun?”

“Uh,” the Captain puffed out a breath, “ya, ya, tons of fun. T-Tame fun, nothing too crazy.” He told her, trying to hide the fact that there had just been plenty of almost-naked women dancing around him. “What about you?”

“Well,” Y/N looked around the noisy bar that she was in, still seeing none of her friends around, “it’s been okay.”

“Only okay?”

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, it started out great.” She explained. “But, uh, everyone ‘sorta went off to do their own thing.”

“They ditched you?” Steve sternly asked, mad at the fact that Y/N was all by herself in the busy city of Las Vegas.

“No!” She shook her head back and forth, even though he couldn’t actually see her. “Pepper and Y/C/N we’re doing so well in the casino that I just let them keep going, last time I saw Nat and Maria they were playing pool, and Y/F/N went off somewhere to hook up with this random guy.”

“Awe, doll. I’m so sorry.” Steve comforted.

Y/N gloomily tapped her nails against the sleek wood bar top, her other hand still holding the phone to her ear. “It’s alright. You know that these clubs and all aren’t exactly my scene anyways.”

“Here,” the man spoke up, coming upon a realization, “I have an idea. Why don’t you go down to the lobby, and I’ll meet you there?”

“You ‘wanna come over here?”

Steve answered like it was obvious. “Of course.”

Y/N was confused. “But hon, it’s your bachelor party. The whole point of the night is to be away from each other. I don’t ‘wanna ruin your fun.”

He shook his head at her words, telling even from blocks away that there was a sheepish look painted on her face. “You honestly think that you’d be ruining my fun? Baby, you are my fun.” Steve looked around the room that he was in, making sure all of his friends seemed alright on their own. “Just meet me down there, N/N. Then we can go up to your room, and I’ll give you the best bachelorette party that you could ever ask for. That’s a promise.”

*****

Y/N fumbled with her hotel room key card as she struggled to unlock her door, getting the red light instead of the green light every time. Though to her defence, there was a major distraction grinding up against her backside.

“Better hurry up, baby girl. I’m getting impatient here.” Steve whispered huskily into her ear, leaving her shivering.

The girl finally managed to unlock her door, and the moment she did, it was closed from the inside and she was shoved against it. Y/N’s legs around Steve’s waist, his lips against her neck. She let out a high-pitched moan.

“Oh, you like that, baby? You like it when your daddy’s rough with you?”

Another whine in response.

“I need an answer, baby.” The man added with a particularly harsh bite to her neck. Y/N instantly knew there’d be marks the next day, worrying that they’d still be there for the wedding, but was too turned on to say anything.

“Yes.” She managed to let slip past her lips.

“‘Yes’ who?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“Good girl.” Just as every time, the word ‘daddy’ went straight to Steve’s dick; the evidence was extremely prominent against Y/N’s thigh. 

He had-had enough by now. And so, he grabbed on to the neckline of her olive green dress and ripped it straight down. His plump lips instantly attacked her chest, which to both his surprise and delight, was not clad in a bra.

“I knew it.” Steve rasped. “Have you been braless all night, my naughty girl?”

“Yes, daddy.” Y/N said shakily. But who could blame her for not wearing one? It was a strapless dress and the top part was double-layered anyways.

“I bet you aren’t wearing any panties either.” He said in between sloppy kisses to her breasts. “I think I have to check.” And with that, he strongly pressed the fingers of his right hand against her clit, being correct about the lack of underwear. But once again, who could blame her? The bottom part of her bodycon dress was very thin, and she definitely couldn’t have panty lines.

“Daddy.” The girl whined.

His fingers then slipped inside her tight, aching hole, repeatedly thrusting in and out.

Y/N’s legs turned to jelly, instantly hanging against Steve’s sides. Luckily though, due to his brute strength and the sturdiness of the hotel’s door, she stayed upright as he continued fucking her with his fingers.

“Cum for me baby, cum for your daddy.” He ordered, his thumb and forefinger instantly pinching her clit.

So with that, Y/N let go of any last bit of control she had left, and came. Hard.

The room was filled with the sounds of whines, panting, and the squishing of Steve’s fingers inside of her wet opening.

“Shhh, shh.” He cooed as she came down from her high. “You did so great, my precious girl.” Right as Y/N felt brought back down to Earth, he started counting in a low voice “That’s one.”

Uh oh, she though to herself. It was one of those nights. Those nights were Steve repeatedly made her cum until she was so sensitive that she couldn’t even move. And it’s not that Y/N didn’t enjoy these nights, because she sure did, but she also knew that once he was getting started, there was no way of getting him to stop.

Steve brought his right hand up to his mouth, slowly and sensually licking the juices off each individual finger as if savouring the taste of her. The man adjusted his hands underneath Y/N’s thighs before he quickly walked them both to the bed, throwing her onto it.

Just as quickly, Steve took off his sport coat and crawled overtop of her with a low growl; this just added to her wetness. “Let’s see how many more you’ve got in you, little girl.” He said with quirked up lips. But that sly smirk was soon out of Y/N’s field of view, as his mouth descended to her dripping pussy.

“Oh, Jesus.” She said as she felt his tongue against her.

He peered up from between her legs. “That’s not my name, princess.” 

“I’m sorry, daddy.”

Steve went back down and continued his delicious assault on her core. With every stroke of his tongue, Y/N felt as if she was being pulled further and further away from her coherent thoughts. The only two things on her mind being the feel of his mouth on her vagina, and the slight brush of his nose against her clit every time he shifted his head.

“Daddy, I-I-I’m going to cum again.” Y/N stuttered.

The words “Do it, babydoll.” vibrated against her pussy, pushing the girl over the edge for a second time.

Steve lapped up every last drop that Y/N had to offer, and once he went up the bed so that they were eye to eye, licked his lips. The man looked every bit as much as a cat who just got his cream. “Two.” He proudly rumbled into her ear.

Y/N was still in her post-orgasm bliss as she heard the sound of Steve’s belt being undone and dropped to the floor. She turned her head just in time to see him finish unbuttoning his shirt, revealing his sculpted chest and abs. Next to go was his pants and boxer briefs, Steve’s large hands pulling them both down all at once. 

Y/N’s mouth watered at the sight of his delicious cock. No matter how many times that she had seen it and felt it before, the size continued to overwhelm her.

As if the man had read her mind, “You like what you see, my baby?” He took the handy condom out of his wallet, rolling it on and stroking himself in the process.

Too caught up in the sight of what was him, all that Y/N could do was nod her head.

Once again, Steve made his way to hover above her. One moment, the girl was staring up into his beautiful blue eyes, and the next, she was moaning out in surprise at the sudden impact of him inside of her. 

Just as suddenly, his dick started to thrust in and out of her at a slow, leisurely pace. Steve was doing it specifically to drive her insane. It had worked.

“Faster, daddy.” Y/N whimpered.

“Baby girl, is that how you ask daddy a question?” The Captain retaliated as he continued to move in and out of her wanting hole.

The girl was almost crying at this point, “Please, please daddy, can you go please faster?”

Steve, starting to get impatient himself, began to fuck her more quickly. He could see how easily she was falling apart underneath him by each squeeze of her walls around his member.

And with a gasp, Y/N was cumming again.

“Three.” Steve groaned out as he was slowing his thrusts. The man then pulled out of her, his dick still as hard as ever.

Without warning the girl was tossed onto her stomach, Steve’s big hands harshly grasping her hips and bringing them closer to his own. There would definitely be bruises the next day, matching the ones he already made on her neck and chest. But she decided she’d wear them all with pride, and maybe a bit of concealer if necessary.

Steve entered her a second time, his pace being even quicker than before; if possible. He could see Y/N’s hands strongly grasping the sheets from his place behind her, just loving how desperate she was for him.

Between the feeling of her tight pussy around him and the continual sounds she was making, the man figured that it wouldn’t be long before he finished. But, he knew he could give her one more first. Steve was the type who got off on getting her off. Y/N had no complaints.

As he started to rub circles on her clit, she loudly moaned out into the vast expanse of her hotel room.

“Come on little girl, give me one more,” Steve huffed. “Cum once more for daddy.”

With that last bit of encouragement, the girl came again; her biggest orgasm of the night triggering his own.

“Y/N, baby.” He groaned out as she collapsed on the bed from exhaustion. Steve swerved just in time to avoid crushing her, running a hand through his damp golden hair. “Best. Bachelor. Party. Ever.” He spoke in between pants of breath.

The girl turned onto her back and nodded her sweat-covered head. “Agreed.”

The man only stayed on the bed a minute before he was up and heading to the ensuite bathroom. He returned with a wet, warm washcloth and began to rub in between Y/N’s thighs, cleaning her up.

“Thank you.” She said hoarsely, her voice practically wrecked after the night’s activities.

“Of course.” Steve replied with a sincere smile. How in less than five minutes he went from a dominant sex god to a sweet and wholesome boyfriend would forever remain a mystery to Y/N.

He returned the cloth to the restroom before making his way back to the bed, turning off the room’s lights along the way.

“I love you so much.” The Captain stated as he tucked them both underneath the covers and pulled her into his arms.

The effect that this man had on her never failed, as Y/N was blushing at the simple phrase they’ve said over a thousand times. “I love you more.” She added cheekily.

“Not possible.” Steve contradicted, just as usual. And before she could counter back, he placed a loving kiss right on her lips.

“Goodnight, Stevie.” Y/N spoke as she turned in his arms, having him spoon her.

“Goodnight, my love.” But, it only took about three seconds before he was speaking up again. “Oh, and babydoll?”

“Mm-hmm?” Y/N replied, almost asleep.

“Four.”

Next Chapter

Feedback is always welcome!❤️

[dottie-wan-kenobi]

song lyrics I use to characterize Dick Grayson

This is definitely not everything (& I would love to do more) but it’s also Extremely Freaking Long so. Many thanks to @zitkaplushie for chatting w me abt this! I would love to hear your thoughts/additions/etc. If u disagree w any of these, feel free to debate w me but please be civil!!

— OVERALL:

Drag Me Down by One Direction: okay there are tons of parts that fit but this line is the best: “I've got fire for a heart / I'm not scared of the dark / You've never seen it look so easy”

I think this one is kind of straightforward lol but. The first line kind of tells me that Dick is passionate, and feels more with his heart than his head. The second line is just kind of a tongue in cheek thing like obviously he’s not. And the third one is both Dick’s confidence and also that it’s just TRUE. He makes things look easy, all kinds of things. It’s just a fact. 

High Hopes by Panic! at The Disco: ugh this has such good lines but this one: “Mama said / Burn your biographies / Rewrite your history / Light up your wildest dreams / Museum victories, every day / We wanted everything, wanted everything”

So I think “Mama” thru to “dreams” ties back to him becoming Nightwing, or going through different identities and kind of letting himself go with it to an extent. Like he doesn’t let it hold him back. The rest of it, like...that’s just Dick’s superheroing career. “We” in this case could be him and Bruce, him and the Titans, him and Damian, etc etc

Catch My Breath by Kelly Clarkson: um. the whole song. the whole thing. buuuut one line I’ll analyze will be: “I don't wanna be left behind / Distance was a friend of mine / Catching breath in a web of lies / I've spent most of my life / Riding waves, playing acrobat / Shadowboxing the other half / Learning how to react”

“I don't wanna be left behind” - he knows this feeling well already and doesn’t want to relive it

“Distance was a friend of mine / Catching breath in a web of lies” - he has like no civilian friends in canon, and even then he’s always lying to somebody about something. There aren’t many people he can be truly close to and open with, other than like Donna and Roy and Kory

“I've spent most of my life / Riding waves, playing acrobat / Shadowboxing the other half / Learning how to react” - idk, when I see this it makes me think that he’s just lived this life that isn’t exactly normal and he recognizes that

Birds by Imagine Dragons: this one makes me so sad but: “I know that / Ooh, birds fly in different directions / Ooh, I hope to see you again / Ooh, birds fly in different directions / Ooh, so fly high, so fly high”

So obviously Dick has lost a lot of people important to him over the years, either because they died or DC said XYZ and Dick’s relationship no longer has any rights, but. This is how he would feel about that. Grudging acceptance, hope to see them again, wishing them well. 

Dance Monkey by Tones And I: I had to. “I said, oh my god, I see you walking by / Take my hands, my dear, and look me in my eyes / Just like a monkey I've been dancing my whole life / But you just beg to see me dance just one more time”

I’ll mention this later on, but I think that Dick projects an image a lot of the time that isn’t what he’s really feeling. This ties into that - I think at certain points in his life, he just gets exhausted and wants to take a break, but he can’t. He feels like everyone is counting on him, either to do this or that, or keep up this appearance. Sometimes they really are, and sometimes it’s pressure he’s putting onto himself!

Icarus by Bastille: tbh this is a song that I think applies to most if not all of the batfam, but for Dick, this is part of it that I like: “You put up your defenses when you leave / You leave because you're certain / Of who you want to be”

I prefer the version of canon where Dick willingly decides to stop being Robin, but even in the way that he gets kicked out, this tells me that he’s steeling himself for whatever may come, and that he’s sure of his actions. 

Stars by Grace Potter: now THIS one is freaking sad. “All those times we looked up at the sky / Looking out so far, it felt like we could fly / And now I'm all alone in the dark of night / And the moon is shining, but I can't see the light.”

Again, he’s lost a lot of ppl!! I usually think of this song as him referring to his parents or Bruce after he “dies”, but it could apply to anyone really. And these lines in specific just make me think that he feels lonely without whoever it is, that he’s not in a good place.

Simple Man by Lynyrd Skynyrd: "Boy, don't you worry, you'll find yourself / Follow your heart and nothing else / And you can do this, oh baby, if you try / All that I want for you, my son, is to be satisfied"

Okay so maybe I hc that the Graysons were very much so free spirits who rubbed off a lot on Dick. But with that aside, to me this is Dick being determined to live a happy life, and knowing it’s going to be a struggle at times. “You’ll find yourself” and “if you try” are things that I think Dick keeps close to mind. Like, maybe he doesn’t know everything right now, but he will. He’ll figure it out. And he can get through anything if he just pushes through it.

Weight In Gold by Gallant: “I’m pulling my weight in gold / Call me anxious, call me broke / But I can’t lift this on my own”

I’ve already mentioned this but Dick has a lot of pressure on his shoulders, like all the time. And he’s also someone who reaches out to others, which is what these lyrics are saying. He’s aware when he can’t handle the pressure anymore and can admit it to himself. (I don’t think this fits him ALL the time, I mean it just doesn’t, but. Sometimes.)

Tears Of A Clown by Smokey Robinson: I really fuck with the idea that Dick is, still, an entertainer. that + the pressure he’s under = “Now if I appear to be carefree / It's only to camouflage my sadness / In order to shield my pride I've tried / To cover this hurt with a show of gladness”

The word “camouflage” stands out to me because I think sometimes the way he hides parts of who he is is to protect himself??? Dick can also be a prideful person, who might not want others to know that he’s been hurt by something they’ve done. 

The Show Must Go On by Queen: relatedly,,, this whole song fits him perfectly. but to do something not related to smiling: “Show must go on. / I'll face it with a grin. / I'm never giving in— / Oh—with the show. / I'll top the bill, / I'll overkill. / I have to find the will to carry on with the show.” 

This ties back to him hiding his real feelings, of course, but also it speaks to how he doesn’t do things by half. This makes me think about being Batman, about how he won’t give in to the pressure, will push through and keep going and uphold his dad’s legacy as best as he can

Pumpin Blood by NONONO: “It's so magical feeling, that no one's got a hold / You're a catalyst to your own happiness you know”

This goes back to my thoughts that Dick has this mindset that if he keeps going, keeps putting in as much effort as he needs to, then he can get what he needs. It’s also kind of those moments where Dick realizes that where he is is good, like being Robin, but it’s not great, and it could be great. When he decides to stop being Robin, it’s like he’s thinking, “I could be happier, and if I want that, I need to do it myself.”

Rocketeer by Far East Movement: this song fits in a lot of spots but. “Here we go, come with me / There's a world out there that we should see / Take my hand, close your eyes / With you right here, I'm a rocketeer”

Overall imo this is a shippy song but this lyric specifically could be Dick and anyone at all -- he’s the kind of guy who reaches out to others, who would enjoy showing people new things. I also think the last bit kind of speaks to how he can feel better and more empowered when he’s not going through things alone 

I Want To Break Free by Queen: “But life still goes on / I can't get used to, living without, living without / Living without you by my side / I don't want to live alone, hey / God knows, got to make it on my own / So baby can't you see / I've got to break free”

This goes back to a few things. For one, I feel that when he feels held back or held down, he’s VERY aware of it and doesn’t like it, and wants to have his freedom back. Another one is, considering all the people he’s lost, it’s like...he doesn’t want to live without them but there’s no choice, he has to. And finally, I also think this is to Bruce, like he’s feeling like he could do and be more if he weren’t being restricted by Bruce

Teams & Friends, Ships, Family, & Bruce under the cut!

— TEAMS & FRIENDS:

Young Volcanoes by Fall Out Boy: there’s a reason why I named my fic after this lol. “When Rome's in ruins / We are the lions / Free of the coliseums / In poisoned places / We are anti-venom / We're the beginning of the end”

I think that Dick really does enjoy superheroing, and that he’s proud of himself and those he works with for being courageous, kind, and helpful to the world. In his more positive moments, this is what I feel like he’d think of his teams and their impacts.

Home by Daughtry: I’ve always thought of this one as a batfam song but tbh I think it works better as a Titans one. “Well I'm going home, / Back to the place where I belong, / And where your love has always been enough for me. / I'm not running from. / No, I think you got me all wrong. / I don't regret this life I chose for me. / But these places and these faces are getting old, / So I'm going home.”

The way I interpret this is like...he DOES love Bruce, he does love the batfam, but ultimately when he thinks about home he thinks of his friends. This is kind of him talking to Bruce, at least in the second half. Another reason why I put it here is that there’s another lyric in the song that says, “I'm going to the place where love / And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.” In the batfam, as zitkaplushie said, love isn’t conditional or anything but it IS exhausting. It takes a toll on them. Love with the titans is just easier.

— SHIPS:

Make Me Feel by Janelle Monae: Dick is bi like this song and this line describes his at-times tumultuous relationships: “It's like I'm powerful with a little bit of tender / An emotional, sexual bender / Mess me up, yeah, but no one does it better / There's nothing better”

He takes comfort and strength from his relationships and sometimes that’s good, hence the powerful/tender part! But in all his relationships, not just his romantic ones, it’s (sometimes) easy for people to affect him

I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) by Celtic Thunder: this fits all of his ships imo: “When I'm lonely, well I know I'm gonna be / I'm gonna be the man who's lonely without you / And when I'm dreaming, well I know I'm gonna dream / I'm gonna dream about the time when I'm with you”

He’s just a sappy boy who is in love. That said, I don’t think these feelings would overtake him!

— FAMILY:

Losing My Religion by R.E.M.: I read this heartbreaking fic recently that dealt with how Dick hid his feelings from EVERYONE and no one noticed anything was wrong, really, except Cass. so. “Every whisper / Of every waking hour / I'm choosing my confessions / Trying to keep an eye on you / Like a hurt, lost and blinded fool, fool / Oh no, I've said too much / I set it up”

Dick is more open than his siblings, but he does still hide things, especially from them. The line “I'm choosing my confessions / Trying to keep an eye on you” makes me think of Dick trying to take care of his siblings, whichever way he can

This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) by Kishi Bashi: “Home is where I want to be / Pick me up and turn me round / I feel numb - born with a weak heart / I guess I must be having fun / The less we say about it the better / Make it up as we go along / Feet on the ground / Head in the sky / It's OK, I know nothing's wrong... nothing”

“Make it up as we go along / Feet on the ground / Head in the sky / It's OK, I know nothing's wrong... nothing” - this reads happier than it’s sang but I do think it describes the more positive side of the family dynamics! 

You’re Not There by Lukas Graham: this one is abt (all of) his parents :( “I only got you in my stories / And you know I tell them right / I remember you and I, when I'm awake at night / So give it up for fallen glory / I never got to say goodbye / I wish I could ask for just a bit more time”

There are times where the deaths of his parents & Bruce (and Alfred) weigh heavily on him, and that everything he does is kind of continuing on where they left off, or doing something they didn’t have time to do. I think he would tell his kids stories about them and that he would try to be as true to them as he can be. And then of course, “So give it up for fallen glory / I never got to say goodbye / I wish I could ask for just a bit more time” is kind of his relationship with his parents after they die

— BRUCE:

(I gave him a separate section bc I have a lot of feels abt them okay??)

The Ballad of Dick Grayson by Crafty McVillain: there are actually a lot of songs abt Dick Grayson, but I picked this one bc of this: “Broken hearts improve, but my mind's broken too / Show me how to hurt and I'll hurt them with you / I'll take on the world, I will fight for you / But tell me how to stop, cause now I'm fighting you”

This is abt when Jason takes on Robin but I like to look at this like:

“Broken hearts improve, but my mind's broken too / Show me how to hurt and I'll hurt them with you” - this is when Dick first comes to the Manor, and when he’s first becoming Robin. He’s struggling and Bruce shows him a way to cope. (is it healthy? lmao)

“I'll take on the world, I will fight for you” - this is just...any time really lol. Dick is loyal to Bruce (to an extent) and will fight alongside him, will do almost anything for him

“But tell me how to stop, cause now I'm fighting you” - then this is how it feels when they’re broken apart for the first time, when they aren’t getting along and it’s just a change from the past few years, and Dick doesn’t know what to do about it

Let You Down by NF: “Feels like we're on the edge right now / I wish that I could say I'm proud / I'm sorry that I let you down / Let you down”

“I'm sorry that I let you down / Let you down” - this could be pre-emptive, Dick kind of thinking that no matter what he does, he’s most likely going to let Bruce down

Like how Bruce is always that 8 year old who lost his parents, Dick is always who he was the first night he went out as Robin, desperately wanting Bruce’s approval

He wants the approval and hates that he does, it feels like it holds him down

The Chain by Fleetwood Mac: “Listen to the wind blow / Watch the sun rise / Run in the shadows / Damn your love / Damn your lies”

When I read these lyrics, I think about Bruce and Dick when they’ve been arguing, having a quiet moment (the peace after the storm, zitkaplushie said), kind of reflecting, and Dick just thinks, “I want you to love me but I want you to stop lying to me.” Or like, “your love comes with your lies and I don’t know if I can handle that [right now].”

Numb by Linkin Park: “I've become so numb, I can't feel you there / Become so tired, so much more aware / I'm becoming this, all I want to do / Is be more like me and be less like you”

There’s this moment in canon, before he even gives up being Robin, where he’s acting just like Batman, hunting down criminals with a single-minded ferocity that has his friends legit concerned for him. I can’t remember exactly what he felt about it when he kind of snapped out it but these lyrics remind me of that. He doesn’t want to be like Bruce, he doesn’t want to be Batman, and especially as a teenager, that last line is big. Overall it also fits when Dick IS Batman, and he feels like he’s kind of being swallowed by everything that it is

The Archer by Taylor Swift: okay I’m sorry I can’t pick between these two: “I've got a hundred thrown out speeches / I almost said to you” and “And all of my heroes / Die all alone / Help me hold on to you”

There are a lot of things Dick doesn’t say to Bruce over the years, or things that he wants to say but doesn’t for however long until he can’t hold it in anymore or it’s the right time or whatever. Ultimately that line just tells me that their relationship isn’t one with great communicating

“And all of my heroes / Die all alone” - Bruce ‘dying’. “Help me hold on to you” - Batman when Dick is him. Or it could be about Dick’s parents, and then Dick trying to keep Bruce alive as Robin/Nightwing

[audiohut]

What do you think you need to produce and engineer your own music? SSL Mix Console? Teletronix LA2A? API 500 modules? The answer is none of thee above. Your skill in the craft is far more important than your equipment. While the gear you use does have an impact, if you do not know where and how these tools should be used, it will make no difference to the quality of your music nor the mix and master.

For the bedroom studio musicians, there are only a few elements you NEED to start up your learning process. With digital tools accurately replicating beautiful vintage pieces of outboard hardware you have more than what you need to get started. But the on a dime musician should start with: (And this entails all instruments digital and live)

Obviously you need a computer. Until you reach a specific point in power, most any desktop or laptop with 8GB’s of ram will suffice. You need decent processing power to stay away from latency as well as distortion and glitches within your project which will also translate to requiring latency in order to move past this until further power is required thus demanding more latency to allow your PC to process information from your wav and tools before it delivers the audio to your speakers or headphones.

An audio interface. You can find great budget friendly interfaces made by Focusrite, Berhinger, Avid and many more that offer great digital amps and a small handful of recording parameters most of which including phantom power if need be per microphone. I recommend the Focusrite 2i2 for starters who want to capture that of both XLR microphones as well as 1/4″ DI or analog signals from bass, guitars, vocals, keyboards and really anything that is mono. For stereo there is a bit of routing you need to implement via your Digital Audio Workstation which will allow multiple inputs to be recorded at once. This can come in handy for things like Drum Rooms, Vocals, Drum Overheads and again, anything you see fit for stereo recording.

This one is a good one as i know most certainly you want the best recording at the source. You can only fix so much in the mix and there is nothing that beats the genuine quality of a great recording as well as one that mails the take rather than editing to compensate. Good microphones ranging from $100-$300 includes the Shure SM58, Rode NT1A, Aston Origin and the famous AKG Pr Audio C214. All of these microphones deliver a brilliant high end as well as capture very natural elements of the performance in detail. The Shure as well as the Rode are very quiet in ways that they eliminate outside noise thanks to the full grill surrounding the unit in case of live recording with other instruments like a full band or group of vocalists in a choir.

This one is optional, but you can never go wrong. You will want a acoustic treatment shield to surround your microphone to help eliminate any reverberation that might make its way back to your microphone. I have an Auralex shield that i swear by in my studio as the whole thing i solid wood leaving lots of room for unwanted reverberation and frequency bleed which can stunt the quality of your performance. There are lots of great products that offer the same kind of shield, but i highly recommend Auralex. (Not noted but obviously you will need a microphone stand to equip your gear upon.)

This one is also quite obvious, but you will need a method of playback and monitoring. I love the process between headphones to monitors as i will detail my mix on headphones for lows and mids and focus the high end to the monitors as well as see how it all translates on a separate pair. Budget monitors are kind of tough, which i why i DO recommend headphones. Sennehsier 589SE or any Sennheiser headphone with a closed back will deliver very honest referencing, but depending on your purchase point you might end up with a pair that emphasize areas of your mix you want heard more truthfully. It is important to remember to reference your mix in your car. This is where most music is enjoyed and will provide a great ground for your further mixing or mastering decisions as subconsciously we all know what pro productions sound like in our car from years of listening. For budget monitors, i highly recommend Yamaha’s HS8’s or HS5’s. These are very transparent speakers that have adjustable parameters for your room as well as low end boosting, mid boost and high end boosting which can all be reduced to best suit your mixing and referencing needs per your room or just flat out what you are comfortable with audibly. I also recommend KRK Rokits. These speakers define your mix in a clean and precise way that is honest for the price point. Standing at around $300 for the five inch monitor set you can not beat this price. I had been referencing on a set of Fostex RM900 eight inch monitors for about a year and added the KRK set to my system and was blown away by how well the high end worked in comparison. To define it by ‘you get what you pay for’ the Fostex monitors were over one thousand dollars as the KRK’s i found used for $175 for both making a set.

Finally, you will need an audio workstation of some sort. Unless you plan on recording to tape, a DAW (Digital Audio Workstation) will inherently make your work flow more ergonomic. With the ability to punch in, edit, sample, use amp sims to develop tone and recovers mixes and so much more without tape you save  yourself an enormous amount of time in these processes. Depending on your styling of music there is a DAW for you! Sadly, not all of them are on a budget… For beat producers you can grab something like FL Studios from anywhere between $100 to $1000 dollars depending on the package you would like. Ableton is a great DAW as well, but does cost you a pretty penny of i believe a fat $800 for the full version. You can get a lite version which does not include some tools here and there for $100. You can find these tools among other companies to implement in your DAW of any kind to compensate as well but in some cases, you can not replicate the original tool. What i started with was Audacity because it was totally free. As i advanced in my needs, i found that Reaper was the best deal on the market as you can trial the FULL version for as long as you would like until you choose to purchase a license AND when you do purchase, it is only sixty dollars! You can download tools from various other aforementioned DAW’s and load them into Reaper to use as if though you were in the DAW of your choice. You get community based updates every thirty days or so which all do nothing but improve the quality and work flow for the people who pay into the company. But at the end of the day, there is no RIGHT DAW. Try the free versions of each one until you find something that pleases you in any way shape or form and really dive into it. I was told to get Logic but did not like how it felt for the price i had to pay. If you can afford it, i do recommend something that is industry standard along with the previously mentioned pieces of gear, but this is about a budget and the artist that is on a dime.

Edit: DO NOT FORGET YOUR CABLES.

And with that i bid thee happy mixing and creating. This small studio setup which should obviously include your instruments of choice (not mentioned for obvious reasons) will run you anywhere between $800-$1500 depending on your products of choice as well as what kind of computer you get with what kind of power. There is nothing cheap about audio and production but this is a killer setup that i spent years on to develop the skills needed to accurately apply those Teletronix LA2A Compressors, API 550’s and various other pieces of boutique gear we all seek. Once you learn the way your tools work you can present your talents among any genre as you will know what needs attention when and where. Do NOT let people tell you genre matters. As it does help to find a niche within your passion for listening, these skills work quite universally unless it is the physical beat, lyric or performance you are delivering. For mixing and engineering yes this applies about 15% from 100%. Stay strong with your setup and remember that practice makes perfect. If you can master your digital tools then you can master your outboard ones with an extra analog touch given by the actual electronics and tubes powering them.

I hope this helps you find the motivation to start recording and engineers your own music as i know hearing this helped the spark for me. For awesome digital tools check out VST4FREE as well as the product companies Waves and Fabfilter which all produce high quality tools for you mixing and writing. If you seek more song writing information or thoughts on music production follow my space and read back on my previous posts!

-Andrew Giordanengo

-Audiohut

[rainofaugustsith]

Thank you very much for the tag @vespertine-legacy​! I can’t remember who has been tagged so @cyrraluu​ @shabre-legacy​ @shimmersing​ @tishinada​ @abbienormal​ @mimabeann​ @dreamy04​ @soulparticle​ @levelofdepth​ NO PRESSURE, only if you want to!  Viri (you know she’s always first because she is)

-CLOTHING MAKES THE WOMAN-

Do their bra and panties match consistently?  Yes | No | Not applicable (and in Viri’s case they are usually completely clashing neon orange or stripes or smiley faces)

Do they wash their makeup off before going to bed?  Yes | No | Sometimes | Doesn’t wear makeup

Do they wear socks? Yes | No | Sometimes (and just like the underwear, they are usually the most garish yet comfortable socks she can find. After Viri lost her foot, Lana tried to cheer her up by knitting her new socks that were ridiculously bright and would fit her cybernetic foot)

What do they usually wear to bed? Nothing | Undergarments | Pyjamas | Pyjama pants | Tomorrow’s clothes (Viri does like comfortable pajamas but they usually end up being worn to lounge around the house. By the time she actually goes to bed she’s *cough* taken them off)

Their clothes are usually… Stained | Raggedy | Like new | Well worn | Depends (If Viri loves a specific piece of clothing she will wear it until it’s rags, but she also is very sharply dressed when she is working and has to make an impression)

-FINANCES? LET’S SEE-

How do they handle their bills? Sets aside bill money each check | Pays them right away | Pays them last minute | They’re frequently overdue | Paying? Bills? What a concept. (Viri doesn’t like loose ends or owing anything to anyone, so if something’s due she will pay it ASAP if she is able)

Most likely to pay with? Raw currency (or barter) | Check/paper trail | Debit | Credit (the Star Wars equivalent of transfering credits electronically. If she pays by credit she will try to pay it off immediately)

What are they most likely to buy? Food | Clothes | Hobby supplies | Work supplies | Trinkets | Movies | Games | Bills | Spend it on others | Charity | Books | Alcohol | Drugs | Technology (since her Wrath days Viri quietly gives a lot of her credits to T.H.O.R.N. and the charities Vette has recommended for helping former slaves and survivors of assault. She’s also far more likely to buy extravagant gifts for Lana, Vette or other loved ones rather than herself. Unless it’s an antique book in which case...). 

-AN APPLE A DAY-

How often do they get exercise? Frequently, from work | Frequently, from a hobby | Somewhat, from a hobby | Somewhat, from work | Never (Viri spends hours every day exercising, conditioning, sparring and working on forms. She also dances for fun. And there’s that exercise she and Lana always have together...*cough*)

Do they drink? Always | Often | Somewhat | On rare occasions | Never (Viri can get drunk just *looking* at a bottle, it seems, so she completely avoids it)

Do they do drugs of any kind? Yes | Sometimes | No

Do they smoke? Yes | Sometimes | No

What ailments do they have? Blind | Deaf | Physical handicap | Bipolar | ADHD | PTSD | Psychosis | DID | Gender dysphoria | Body dysphoria | Depression | Anxiety | Learning/developmental disability | Asthma | Food allergies | Other allergies | Insomnia | Migraines | Mute | Epilepsy (Viri also has chronic pain)

-EDUCATION MATTERS-

What education have they reached? None | Elementary/Primary | Middle/Secondary | High/Tertiary | College, bachelors | College, masters | College, PhD | GDA | Workforce training | (Viri went to Imperial schools and the Sith Academy from the time she was a small child, and her parents also educated her in their fields of science and math. The Sith sent her to get a degree at the University of Corellia because she was so strong in some disciplines of science. She also reads and seeks out knowledge from anyone who will teach her). 

Do they frequently learn new skills? Yes | On occasion | Only as needed | Not usually (as noted above if you have something new you can show Viri, she’s all ears. Tying knots, learning sabacc tricks, silly jokes, new Force skills, slang she doesn’t know in other languages...anything)

How do they learn best? Visually | By ear | Hands-on | Logically | Socially | On their own Rorjhana

-CLOTHING MAKES THE WOMAN-

Do their bra and panties match consistently? Yes | No | Not applicable (the Jedi ones matched, but they were drab. Now she wears whatever she likes and it’s usually racy)

Do they wash their makeup off before going to bed? Yes | No | Sometimes | Doesn’t wear makeup

Do they wear socks? Yes | No | Sometimes

What do they usually wear to bed? Nothing | Undergarments | Pyjamas | Pyjama pants | Tomorrow’s clothes (Ror did not have her own room until she was assigned her ship at the beginning of the class story. Once she did, she quickly learned that if she walked around naked or topless, people wouldn’t barge into her space anymore. She’s kept that up because it’s more comfortable and ahem, if she’s not sleeping alone there’s no need for clothes...

Their clothes are usually… Stained | Raggedy | Like new | Well worn | Depends 

-FINANCES? LET’S SEE-

How do they handle their bills? Sets aside bill money each check | Pays them right away | Pays them last minute | They’re frequently overdue | Paying? Bills? What a concept. (Ror tries to avoid even getting a bill. When she was a Jedi she paid everything up front so the Jedi Order wouldn't find out and there wouldn't be a paper/cyber trail. That practice has stayed with her even though she's no longer a Jedi and the Alliance is much more chill.)

Most likely to pay with? Raw currency (or barter) | Check/paper trail | Debit | Credit (Ror never had anything other than raw currency as a Jedi and she had to hide it, since the Jedi aren't supposed to own things. She still has not figured out how to use an account, and both Somminick Timmns and the Alliance have agreed to give her cash.

What are they most likely to buy? Food | Clothes | Hobby supplies | Work supplies | Trinkets | Movies | Games | Bills | Spend it on others | Charity | Books | Alcohol | Drugs | Technology

-AN APPLE A DAY-

How often do they get exercise? Frequently, from work | Frequently, from a hobby | Somewhat, from a hobby | Somewhat, from work | Never (There are some very enjoyable hobbies Ror partakes in...)

Do they drink? Always | Often | Somewhat | On rare occasions | Never (Ror enjoys cantinas. It’s another thing the Jedi banned for her and she feels like it’s an extra ‘fuck you’ to enjoy wine, women and song. 

Do they do drugs of any kind? Yes | Sometimes | No

Do they smoke? Yes | Sometimes | No

What ailments do they have? Blind | Deaf | Physical handicap | Bipolar | ADHD | PTSD | Psychosis | DID | Gender dysphoria | Body dysphoria | Depression | Anxiety | Learning/developmental disability | Asthma | Food allergies | Other allergies | Insomnia | Migraines | Mute | Epilepsy

-EDUCATION MATTERS-

What education have they reached? None | Elementary/Primary | Middle/Secondary | High/Tertiary | College, bachelors | College, masters | College, PhD | GDA | Workforce training | I don’t know | Other (Since the Jedi grabbed her as a young child she's never been to school other than the Jedi Academy. That gave her a high literacy level and a strong handle on the Republic's government and perspective of history, but not much else. Since leaving the Jedi she's tried to read and learn on her own.)

Do they frequently learn new skills? Yes | On occasion | Only as needed | Not usually (Ror is usually very prickly to strangers and doesn’t make friends easily, but if you offer to teach her something or help her learn, you can often reach her and gain her friendship)

How do they learn best? Visually | By ear | Hands-on | Logically | Socially | On their own Ikina

-CLOTHING MAKES THE WOMAN-

Do their bra and panties match consistently? Yes | No | Not applicable (sometimes)

Do they wash their makeup off before going to bed? Yes | No | Sometimes | Doesn’t wear makeup

Do they wear socks? Yes | No | Sometimes

What do they usually wear to bed? Nothing | Undergarments | Pyjamas | Pyjama pants | Tomorrow’s clothes

Their clothes are usually… Stained | Raggedy | Like new | Well worn | Depends (Iki lives in the Star Wars equivalent of well-worn jeans and T-shirts)

-FINANCES? LET’S SEE-

How do they handle their bills? Sets aside bill money each check | Pays them right away | Pays them last minute | They’re frequently overdue | Paying? Bills? What a concept. (Ikina and Ashara run their own tea house, and they’re acutely aware that they have to cover costs so they budget as closely as they can)

Most likely to pay with? Raw currency (or barter) | Check/paper trail | Debit | Credit 

What are they most likely to buy? Food | Clothes | Hobby supplies | Work supplies | Trinkets | Movies | Games | Bills | Spend it on others | Charity | Books | Alcohol | Drugs | Technology (Ikina reads the trades and if there are new tech toys, she wants them. She also spoils her daughter and Ashara quite a bit)

-AN APPLE A DAY-

How often do they get exercise? Frequently, from work | Frequently, from a hobby | Somewhat, from a hobby | Somewhat, from work | Never (Ikina likes to take long walks. As a slicer she’s at a desk a lot; as an owner of a tea house she runs around a bit more)

Do they drink? Always | Often | Somewhat | On rare occasions | Never

Do they do drugs of any kind? Yes | Sometimes | No

Do they smoke? Yes | Sometimes | No

What ailments do they have? Blind | Deaf | Physical handicap | Bipolar | ADHD | PTSD | Psychosis | DID | Gender dysphoria | Body dysphoria | Depression | Anxiety | Learning/developmental disability | Asthma | Food allergies | Other allergies | Insomnia | Migraines | Mute | Epilepsy (Ikina gets a lot of bad headaches and migraines that probably are not helped by stress and staring at her computer console)

-EDUCATION MATTERS-

What education have they reached? None | Elementary/Primary | Middle/Secondary | High/Tertiary | College, bachelors | College, masters | College, PhD | GDA | Workforce training | I don’t know | Other (Ikina went to school on Miralai up through her Masters and did very well.)

Do they frequently learn new skills? Yes | On occasion | Only as needed | Not usually

How do they learn best? Visually | By ear | Hands-on | Logically | Socially | On their own

[retro-rudy]

Logic- No Pressure Album Review

In summation of Logic's career, the foremost qualities that can’t go unnoticed is the dedication, respect and admiration the man has always had for the art of hip-hop. From the beginning, dating back to his Young Sinatra mix-tape series, in an era where trap beats were overtaking hip-hop, Logic arrived as a breath of fresh air with his conscious driven lyrics and entertaining flow, fueled by the boom-bap style he enjoyed from earlier influences such as Wu-Tang Clan, A Tribe Called Quest, and Mos Def. Logic lived up to the hype and expectations by delivering a successful debut album and painting a promising future, in which, considering how the industry measures success, Logic went onto surpass by reaching the heights of mainstream play and various award nominations with his next 2 studio albums. Amid the commercial success came the broader spotlight, the very one that emphasized his every move, and drew fluctuated criticism to an all-time high for the Maryland emcee. The challenges for Logic however were not the subjective opinions people had towards his music, but rather stemmed from the more personal jokes, memes, and the non-music related opinions that seemed to overshadow the music he was creating for audiences. In 2019, these unfortunate circumstances led Logic to step away from music and social media for some time with no public explanation to the reasoning of his hiatus. That was until the ever so unpredictable 2020 saw Logic emerge with a staggering album announcement accompanied by an unexpected retirement announcement.

Logic, returned in 2020 as many anticipated, with his 7th and final studio album, No Pressure. The joint announcement of album date and retirement came on July 16th, just one week before the set album release date. While the announcement was abrupt and left many with lingering questions, the 1 week wait would eventually lead fans to the clear reasoning of his decision through No Pressure’s foundation of honest and convincing lyrics.

Right out of the gates, Logic sets the tone and premise of the direction he will take the album on the opening track, No Pressure Intro. Logic applies audio from the famous Orson Wells “The Hitchhiker” introduction, which Logic chops and edits perfectly to bring us into the album. Within the edits, Logic cites No I.D and The Incredible True Story to give the intro a fun twist that adds the thematic touch many have grown accustomed to in Logic’s discography. The fundamentally ear-hitting boom-bap beat produced by NO I.D could not have been curated any better for Logic on the opener. Logic and the instrumental go hand in hand as he delivers bar after bar for over a minute and a half before reaching an abrupt interruption that catapults you into the next track. “B*tch I’m too alive, like twins in a womb, come hither, consume” and “But it cost a fee to be the boss it cost to be, over possessions like an apostrophe.” are some of the more standout bars on this intro.

           On No Pressure, Logic’s overall mood comes off positive, natural, motivated and unforced which benefits each song on this record in its own way. On songs such as Hit My Line, Celebration, and Amen, Logic’s unhinged and unpressed mind state injects everlasting life and validation to the long peace, love and positivity advocate. Logic’s comfort with his current-self shines through on Hit My Line with a confident, worry-free chorus and candid verses as he persuasively calls on god for a fixing of humanity. Logic’s positive drive has been a stapled message within his raps since the beginning of his career and the messaged remains well intact on Hit My Line and the entirety of this project. The confidence he shows when he says, “They say they don’t want messages in rap, it ruins the art. Well here I am people, yeah, now tear me apart.” further endorses his attempt of leaving it all out for this record with no regrets. Even on the track, Celebration, where Logic taps into his braggadocio side of rap to pen out the worry-free mindset he now has and how there is nothing for him to prove to anyone, you can hear the freeing mentality he has as he spits:

“It’s been a minute now; my style is feeling infinite now. Used to people pulling me down, it ain’t shit to me now. Don’t let it get to me now: threw out my phone, they can’t get to me now.”

These tracks dwell on a cheerful and flamboyant tempo that Logic ceases throughout the entirety of the tracks. The same can be said for songs like Dadbod, Perfect, and 5 Hooks, that show versatility in terms of beat choices and the ability of Logic to naturally execute each varying flow that comes off as effortlessly in this stage of his career.

           Meshed in with the collection of the more upbeat and elated-expressive tracks, Logic sprinkles in tracks built off well executed hip-hop samples that serve up a heavier dose of conscious articulated bars. Dating back to the Young Sinatra mix-tapes, Logic has never been shy to wear his influences on his sleeve, and tracks like GP4 and Man i is prove this to the be the case in present day. GP4, a nostalgic tie-in with Logic’s Growing Pains’ song collection, which we last heard on Under Pressure, contains a sample constructed from OutKasts’ Elevators song from ATLiens. Given the track record of various and well-respected hip-hop samples Logic has placed on each of the Growing Pains’ tracks, this one fits cohesively with the bunch. Much like the previous Growing Pains’, Logic leans on his story telling to paint witty and mental pictures of a variety of thoughts floating in his mind. From adolescent memories, to admitting his once determination of becoming the greatest rapper alive now being inessential, Logic goes onto acknowledge how the greatest rapper alive might not even be rapping and is instead stacking groceries at an ordinary 9 to 5 with no care in the world, resembling much how Logic feels at this point in his career. On Man i is, Logic’s maturity and growth flourishes among the inspired instrumental created out of an iconic mashup consisting of OutKasts’ SpottieOttieDopaliscious, Tarika Blues’ Dreamflower, DJ Screw and Pimp C. Logic self-reflects as he looks back on where he came from and what he endured, to which through it all has led him to this point in life where he can confidently say he is sincerely proud of the man he has become. In hip-hop it’s made well-aware that high expectations are to be met when paying homage to classics and Logic absolutely fulfills the task on this one in a form that without a doubt places Man i is among the most prominent tracks within his discography. Open Mic\\Aquarius III keeps Logic on the lyrical prowess and serves as a bridge for fans to connect with the bar for bar artillery the emcee has long had. The beat switch that takes place in this track is superb with the pure hip-hop cypher sound of Open Mic interestingly transitioning into the more jazzy and mellow Aquarius III. The high-volume of bars continues immediately on the following track, Soul Food II. The deserving sequel to one of Logic’s held in high regards track off his debut album Under Pressure. Logic retains the format of spitting a series of bars as he did in the original Soul Food. It’s warming and evident to hear the growth in both, his mentality as a human and abilities of his craft as an artist when you hear both songs in sequential order. In Soul Food II, mentally, Logic remains as humble and passionate as ever while sonically the tone and delivery of his raps resonate with the listener enough to have them capture and break down his every word. This along with the metaphors within this song is what prompts Soul Food II to standout on its own and give its predecessor a run for its money, and dare I say, maybe even edge out the original.

           On the last leg of the album is where I find Logic taking the listener towards the conclusion of the album on a pure, passion driven energy specifically due to the openness of Dark Place, and the spiritually motivating Heard Em Say. Dark Place is the first of its kind for the emcee as it is by far the most personal track Logic has ever released. While Logic has been open about personal situations before, it has never been to the degree and sentiment he lets out on the track. What was meant to remain an unreleased and personal track shares a transparent view of his feelings regarding the real toll the amount of negativity and criticism took on his mental state.

“Writin’ rhymes was easy before the fame. Now I’m constantly overthinkin’ every line, it’s a shame. Rap used to fill me with joy, now it’s nothin’ but pain. I’m stuck in the game, tryna get back from where I came.”

 The entire song contains some of Logic’s most honest and heart-breaking lyrics that transport you directly to the most difficult year he experienced as a mainstream artist. “I’d love to end this on some positive shit. Hit you with punchlines instead of some derogative shit, but it’s okay to be sad sometimes and tired of shit.. I guess.” Logic becomes as relatable to the listener as ever with his sincerity on here. And while the song might show vulnerability, it’s okay. In the end the fan and artist label are irrelevant compared to the human label we all fall under. Another evident example of the earnest connection between Logic and his Rattpack. Fittingly so, the best in my opinion is saved for last. Heard Em Say easily ranks in the top 5 of Logic's entire released discography for me. From self-producing the song, to writing one of his most heartfelt verses, the song sums up as one of Logic’s most range defining cuts from an artist standpoint. The 3rd verse on Heard Em Say is one of Logic’s best verses from his discography, and impressively so isn’t due to the depth of lyricism, but due to Logic’s infinite passion heard throughout the verse. Logic grabs you with every word and instills raw emotion and inspiration with a hopeful send off in quintessential fashion Logic has long been known for.

After Confessions of a Dangerous Mind failed to reach favorable appreciation within hip-hop enthusiasts, and his fan base respectively; the project left many wondering if perhaps Logic’s better days were behind him. With unfavorable reviews and criticism weighing heavily on the emcee, Logic spent the better part of 2019 and 2020 writing raps vigorously on his Louis Vuitton rhyme book as he mentions on the freeing Amen. Logic stated in an interview with Nick Huff Barili of Hard Knock TV, that No Pressure essentially came to fruition out of his essential love for hip-hop no longer being intact, before coming to the conclusion of ending his career and delivering a final project in the form of which he came into the game with, a project he would give his every ounce of love for hip-hop to, to showcase pure hip-hop built on a foundation of bars and verses made up of the emcee’s best abilities. With executive production from No I.D, No Pressure achieves this and sees Logic set the record straight in his place among hip-hop. In retrospect, while the time apart might have been difficult, I believe both Logic and fans of Logic in the long run reached a perfect ending of a prominent and inspiring career. No Pressure serves as a celebrated accumulation and reflection of the inspiring emcees’ hip-hop career, the final chapter that gives the fan closure and comprehension for his farewell. Logic is now free of pressure and has found happiness by obtaining the greatest blessing in life, family. Thank you for delivering us this classic, and the best of wishes on your future endeavor Bobby. Final rating: 10

[bishie-haven]

Graceful Equestrian: What Should You Play?

Hello again, fellow Princesses and Princes!

Horses are such elegant creatures, aren’t they? Because of my older sister’s love for them when I was younger, I’ve seen and heard a lot about these animals. Although the one thing more impressive than horses are the riders and trainers able to tame them from being wild creatures to the majestic beings we see them as now.

And the best rider of all the UtaPri boys? None other than Camus, who has finally received his first Collection Event to wrap up Rotation #5!

Just like equine being trained for dressage, we need to run through what needs to happen before the real show can begin. And I’m here to help you do just that! Come on, let’s get to it!

(Note: Please read this guide until the end, I have something I want to say...)

IMPORTANT REMINDER

Despite Cecil’s little change in the Event Song type with Crown of Agna...the Alternate Arrangements aren’t finished yet. But unless our prince will get his audition song made into one in his next event, Zettai Reido Emotion should be the LAST ONE!

However, like I’ve said in every single guide I’m typed onto this platform, if you cannot acquire enough Event Song Passes over the course of the week...

DO NOT PLAY THE EVENT SONG (ALTERNATE ARRANGEMENT) MORE THAN ONCE A DAY!!

Now then, let’s start with the basic training with the reins: AKA our Plans of Action!

Plan A: Two for One

We have come to the difficult kink of Plan A: having both a ST☆RISH and Quartet Night member in the same event. However, we don’t have just Golden☆Star (2:14) that includes both of our long-haired bishies...have we forgotten the one song that shows off their ultimate sex appeal?!

Oh YES, Baby! My Strawberry! (1:54) is a great song to use during this event, not just because it includes the featured boys and is a Crowd-Pleaser in the second half...but because it’s just a pure BOP to enjoy!

Plan B: Separate and Swift

Alright, I’ve said this in 5 of my last 6 guides, you get it: for Camus, since he’s a QN member, Poison Kiss (1:15) is the best song for him, blah blah blah...what about if you’re sick to death of the quartet’s song from Maji Love 2000%? In the main tab, there’s a couple of really good options for the platinum blonde. Pairing up with his kouhai in Northwind and Sunshine (1:27) is a great song to play, or what about going with his groupmate, Ai, in Tsukiakari no Dearest (1:33) instead? 

Going onto Ren, the song you want to play for him is his jazzy audition song, Akuma no Kiss wa Honou yori Hageshiku (1:27) geez this is a long title...! But besides this, we also have his trio with his rival and senpai with Dream More than Love (1:34), AND his original group’s performance of Maji Love 1000% (1:41) to account for!

Okay, so we’re done with the basics, so now let’s get the saddle on with those Crowd-Pleasers!

“Graceful Equestrian” Crowd-Pleaser Songs

1st Half (Day 1-Day 4 (first half))

Joker Trap- 1:13 (PLAY!!!)

You’re My Life- 2:01 (Do NOT Play!)

Mellow x2 Chu- 1:44 (Play!)

2nd Half (Day 4 (second half)-Day 7)

Baby! My Strawberry!- 1:54 (Play...)

Saintly Territory- 1:58 (Play...)

Sekai no Hatemade Believe Heart- 1:28 (Play!!)

We’ve got the basic maneuvers, we’ve got the saddle, now comes the most important part: adding the rider! In our case, our rider is how we can get the most aqua corsages in our hands with the best efficiency!

Daily Efficiency

1st Half (Day 1-Day 4 (first half))

(Plan A)

Joker Trap/Baby! My Strawberry!: 8 times

Zettai Reido Emotion (Alt): 1 time

(Plan B)

Poison Kiss/Northwind and Sunshine/Tsukiakari no Dearest: 7 times

Akuma no Kiss wa Honou yori Hageshiku/Dream More than Love/Maji Love 1000%/Mellow x2 Chu: 8 times

Zettai Reido Emotion (Alt): 1 time

2nd Half (Day 4 (second half)-Day 7)

(Plan A)

Baby! My Strawberry!: 8 times

Zettai Reido Emotion (Alt): 1 time

(Plan B)

Poison Kiss/Northwind and Sunshine/Tsukiakari no Dearest: 7 times

Akuma no Kiss wa Honou yori Hageshiku/Sekai no Hatemade Believe Heart/Dream More than Love/Maji Love 1000%: 8 times

Zettai Reido Emotion (Alt): 1 time

Now normally I end these guides with some funny quip saying that the guide is done and that I wish you all the best of luck during the next seven days of chaos...but this time I want to address something that has been brought to my attention. 

Over the past couple months of releasing these Collection Event Guides, I have received multiple anonymous messages questioning the point of these posts. I have been asked why I recommend playing any other song beside Crowd-Pleasers, as they have “calculated” and said it would only take small minutes off their play time. I have even been accused of misleading players just because I talk about playing shorter songs instead of longer ones that can give a slight boost, and that I should put a disclaimer in every guide that those 6 songs...DO give that boost. I want to address these concerns real quick before I end this post. Nothing of what I say comes with any malice: I am simply answering the questions that those who asked have.

The shorter address relates to the message saying my guides are misleading and that I should provide a disclaimer:

While I believe that the guides I make are great resources, there is one resource that should be trusted even before me: the Shining Live app itself. When every event begins, no matter the type, an announcement is placed in every player’s inbox, stating all of the rules and the explanations of every aspect of that event type. For Collection Events, this also includes an explanation of how Crowd-Pleasers work:

But the bigger address goes to those questioning why I recommend shorter songs, songs with only one idol instead of both, or any other song instead of “the ones that get you more points”:

I make these Collection Event Guides for players of all types. I have talked to many players since I started creating these guides, and almost every single one has been in a different scenario. There are some people who want to go in it for the long haul over the week, trying to tier for their best boy. There have been others who can’t play the entire week and only have a short time span to get the cards they want. There have been people with LP gifts aplenty to spare, while others only have a limited amount stashed away and rely on the ones they can get through the exchange. Some have just wanted one SR copy, one UR copy, or even wanted to go all the way to the top of the ranks. There are many types of players in Shining Live, and many ways players may tackle a certain event.

And that’s why my guides are so multi-faceted. I state what the shortest songs are for those who have a limited time-span or are spamming at the last minute to pass the threshold of points or corsages needed for a specific reward. I explain different Plans of Action for idol combinations that aren’t the most common and that there is more than one way to tackle a problem. I show the times of each Crowd-Pleaser because, like I explained in the very first Event Guide that had these songs, Dreamy Aquarium: What Should You Play?, if you are in a state where you are not worried about LP, you can actually earn more points and corsages in the same time frame by playing more of a quicker normal song instead of a longer Crowd-Pleaser in some cases. I provide lists for Daily Efficiency for those wanting to net the corsage rewards for playing both songs of the featured idols and playing the event song enough times (if possible), as for those wanting the UR copy in the exchange, the highest cost there at 35,000 flower bouquets, this is one of the best ways to rack up enough to pay for it if they play throughout the week.

You do not have to follow every piece of advice I give in these guides. You could follow the Plan A route of Daily Efficiency through the week but play some of the longest songs in the game. You can play the shortest songs in the catalog but be completely unmatched from the boys featured. You can play every Crowd-Pleaser there is if you want to! What I put in these guides is not gospel:

You can pick and choose whatever you feel will help you in your specific situation, all of it or none of it. It is all completely up to you. 

And with me stating my peace, I hope you can enjoy this Collection Event, no matter how you choose to engage with it.

Hope to see you again soon, Princesses and Princes.

[your-iron-lung]

Survivor Blues

also available to read on AO3 HERE

You call that a scar? A bruise? A tear? Pillow-marks. Souvenirs. 

Story Synopsis: 'What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger' is a philosophy Billy's father has been beating into him for as long as he can remember. If you get hurt, suck it up and walk it off. Take the pain and live with it. Grow with it; let it make you a better person.

Surviving the Mindflayer hurt. He should've been able to adapt to the pain; should've been able to let it shape him and make him stronger, but he can't. It's too much. The pain is too great and all consuming, and Billy has far too many things that need to be healed at once. 

In the end, what didn't kill him only makes him wish he'd died.

Word Count: 3416

Pairings: Light Harringrove

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, light angst (but with a happy ending- SOMETHING I DONT USUALLY DO)

Notes: this was just supposed to be a small thing, like, 4 paragraphs max, but it blew up and welp here it is. title comes from the song ‘Survivor Blues (the after hours)’. UHHH ENJOY **************

Surviving hurts.

Laying down, standing up; simply existing hurts him immeasurably. It’s like he can’t get comfortable anymore. Walking, talking, resting, sleeping, eating (especially eating) - anything and everything he does causes him more pain than he knows what to do with. But what else can he do? He’s alive, after all. He survived.

He tries to carry on like nothing’s wrong to prove a point, like, by pretending he’s not in constant pain it’ll somehow prove that he’s still as strong as he used to be, but it makes it all worse. Despair creeps in with the hurt, but before it overwhelms him he adopts it; uses his pain as penance, abuses this new sick form of self-flagellation to try and convince himself that he’s only getting what he deserves for all the hurt he’s caused countless others.

The doctors that saved his life had told him that recovery wouldn’t be easy, but still, Billy thinks, maybe he’d have been better off dying. Some days it hurts even to breathe, and if this is the way he’s going to be for the rest of his life, then he hopes he lives a short one, absolution be damned.

His dad still hits him. It hurts.

For a while after he’d been released from the hospital, things had been fine at home. Tense, but no voices raised. No hands raised. Some semblance of peace descending upon father and son until the bills from the hospital come in and Neil just loses it. Rages for hours. Just yelling, at first, but eventually his hands come flying and Billy is too hurt to escape them.

It becomes routine after that, although Billy notices that his father’s fist is a little bit gentler as it collides into him. Almost like he’s mindful of the places he’s already been hurt, as though by striking him in the places he still feels solid he’s showing his son some kind of mercy. It could be worse. Maybe Billy should be grateful. He isn’t.

Redemption is a far off dream that grows dimmer by the day whenever his father finds cause to blacken his eye.

 ***

He hears about Harrington through Max occasionally. Sees him around town sometimes when his dad drags him out. It hurts.

Part of that hurt stems from the unresolved things he did to Steve that night at the Byers’ place, but most of it actually stems from the night he almost died- should’ve died. It comes from where he’d been lying prone on the floor of the Starcourt Mall, bleeding out corrupted, blackened blood with Max crying over him. He couldn’t move his head after being impaled by so many cruel appendages, but even as his gaze had been fixed firmly upwards, he’d seen that pretty, pretty face of Steve’s looking down at him from over the railing of one of the upper floors. If Billy remembers right (and he does), Steve had appeared stricken. Horror-struck and dumbfounded. Billy pictures that look of terror on his face and feels his chest constrict painfully, because whenever he sees Harrington around town these days, he looks happy. Content. Like nothing ever happened. It pains him to see that he’s somehow made his life livable despite the things he’s seen, but it hurts more when he realizes Steve doesn’t ever look his way, even though he knows, he must know that Billy is near.

They hadn’t been friends before any of this, but rather, they’d been close to being something more.

 ***

It feels like he has nothing left to live for. It hurts.

He makes a list one day and runs down all the things he used to take stock in before his flaying and can’t find one single thing that stands up. His looks? Ruined; his body riddled with deep, ugly scars and a stomach devastated by irreversible chemical damage that leaves him barely able to eat anything. His car? Totaled beyond repair when Harrington had to T-bone into it to save those kids’ lives (and even the memory of that hurts). His friends? Tommy H. had gotten out of Hawkins while the getting was good and took Carol with him; probably the only smart thing he’d ever done in his life. High school was over, the crown he’d usurped passed on to the next sniveling bastard in line who wanted to be king.

He’s bitter when he comes to terms with the fact that he has nothing. Has no one. Can’t even tolerate looking himself in the mirror to see what being flayed has done to him. He’s too thin. Torn. Unrecognizable and dead around the eyes, haunted by the things his handler made him do.

His gaze is drawn to the necklace that keeps his Saint medal close to his heart and hates the way that it hangs heavily around his neck. It gets heavier every time he remembers it’s there until finally it feels like the chain it’s looped on is digging into his skin. He takes it off when he can’t stand it any longer; doesn’t think ol’ Saint Christopher can do anything to help him anymore. Hasn’t helped him in a long time, actually, when he thinks about it.

 ***

He almost kills himself one night. Accidentally, but still as an indirect result of all the accumulated traumas and hurts he’s still struggling to contend with months later. It feels good for once.

Max finds him, of all people. Walks right into his room without knocking to ask if he’s seen something of hers she just can’t seem to find but knows is in the house somewhere. She stops talking as soon as she sees him splayed out on his bed, foamy vomit trickling out of his mouth, empty bottles of beer littering the floor and a stomach full of prescribed pain medications that don’t fucking work.

“It wasn’t on purpose, it just never stops hurting. They don’t help,” he tells her later, after his ruined stomach gets pumped and his dad wails on him for that added cost to his already large hospital tab. “Nothing works. I thought maybe more would.”

She looks at him differently after that. No longer cold. No longer calculated; just thoughtful. Contemplative, but not in the same way where, in the past, she’d had to tread on eggshells around him or he’d hurt her in much the same way Neil hurts him. She becomes surprisingly loyal after that, even after all he’s done to her- done to her friends- and that hurts.

She becomes the support he hadn’t realized he needs. Convinces him to try the recommended physical therapy to hopefully get to a place where it doesn’t hurt for him to simply exist anymore.

“I’ll get a job,” she promises him, knowing full well that whatever place willing to hire a 15 year old won’t pay nearly enough to cover the cost of continual therapy sessions. “We all can; we didn’t know how to help you before, so we didn’t, and I’m sorry, Billy, we were so scared- but we know what we can do for you now. We can help you.”

Her words hurt. At first because she’s confirmed for him what he’s suspected all along: that they hadn’t even tried to help him, but before that old semblance of anger he used to rely on can surface, she’s hugging him, and he realizes that the hurt this time comes from a place of emotional vulnerability too deep within him to pinpoint exactly.

It hurts, is the bottom line- but this time it’s a good kind of hurt. The kind that has him hugging her back.

 ***

Slowly, he begins to heal. The pain doesn’t lessen, but other things he hadn’t realized were hurt begin to mend.

He gets to know her friends; manages to apologize to Lucas for all the shitty things he’s said and done specifically to him. In turn, they begin to help him, but all the paper routes, lawn mowing gigs, and occasional pet sitting opportunities they take up don’t really amount to much in the long run.

But he still continues healing.

They try to recruit the teens. Nancy gives what she can, but most of the money she makes goes towards traveling costs so she can continue to see Jonathan without having to rely on her parents. Billy refuses to take her money anyway; he’s not a goddamned charity case, but unbeknownst to him she puts what she can afford to spare in Mike’s hand for him anyway. Not that she’d had anything to do with what happened to him, but some people are just good at heart- something Billy hasn’t had a whole lot of experience with.

They don’t hear back from Harrington.

It helps. He heals. It’s close, but it’s not enough.

He still hurts.

They all struggle to get him through the initial assessment appointment with a therapist, and it doesn’t go well. Billy hates it; hates the fact that he has to rely on other people for the betterment of himself, but he doesn’t want to squander all the hard work those damnable kids are doing for him. It drains him. It drains their funds. He doesn’t know what to say when the secretary asks what day she can schedule his next appointment for. He almost tells her ‘never’, but settles for ‘same time next week’ when Max takes his hand in hers and looks up at him with that determined, patented Mad Max gleam in her eye.

She knows as well as he does that they won’t be able to raise enough money in time for it, but he goes anyway when ‘same time next week’ inevitably rolls around. Somehow, miraculously, he’s able to afford it. When he asks Max how that’s possible, she stays suspiciously quiet. A mysterious benefactor has started funding his therapy visits, he realizes.

He hates it. The knowledge that he can’t know who he’s become indebted to hurts what’s left of his pride.

 ***

Weeks pass and the results of his therapy visits manifest in little ways. He can take deep breaths without his chest and lungs constricting too sharply. It doesn’t hurt as much to walk. On good days he can even laugh without that deep pain blowing up inside him. Not that he laughs all that much anymore.

Max remains quiet whenever he asks her who’s doing this for him.

“A friend,” is all she says whenever he tries to corner her about it.

“I don’t have any friends,” he informs her, to which she shrugs and replies, “You have one.”

He heals. Day by day as he learns the exercises, he heals. But still he wonders who.

Who the hell cares about him that much to help him? Not Neil. Not Susan. Max was already doing her best for him, but her best wasn’t enough. To think that someone out there could care so much about his recovery leaves him feeling oddly funny. He both likes and dislikes it.

The mystery doesn’t stay unsolved for long.

When school starts again, Max can’t go with him to his appointments anymore. She becomes afraid that he won’t go if someone doesn’t go with him to make sure he does (and she might be right about that), and arranges for someone else to take him but declines to say who.

He waits outside on the porch for them, smoking lazily now that it doesn’t hurt him to breathe in deeply anymore. Sunglasses on even though it’s overcast because that fucking thing left its aversion of sunlight in him when it died. Coat on, collar up. Trying to reclaim the air of confidence he used to live by even if he doesn’t quite fill out his clothes like he used to anymore.

He waits until he sees his ride pull up to the curb in front of his house. He lets his cigarette smolder on his lips, lets it burn right down to the filter before he flicks it away as he belatedly comes to understand just who has been helping him.

Harrington honks at him, pokes his head out the window and says, “Shake a leg, Hargrove, let’s get a move on.”

Billy wants to be angry. Wants to be obstinate just because he can, but he’s tired and only has so many spoons left to get through the day with. He goes with him without much of a fuss, but has about a hundred things he wants to say to him as they ride.

It hurts that he can’t get any of them out.

 ***

Recovery is a slow process.

The drives to his therapist aren’t long, but there’s still room enough to hold a conversation if they ever chose to do so. They don’t.

Neither one of them is able to say anything to the other for days until Steve finally takes the initiative to breach that wide, wide gap that didn’t used to be between them.

“So… I’ve been seeing a guy,” he starts, side-eyeing Billy as he speaks to take stock in his expression.

They’re stuck at a red light that hasn’t turned green for two minutes. It’s divine. It’s torture.

It hurts.

“That’s… nice,” Billy says slowly, unsure of what Steve’s getting at. If it’s relationship advice, he has nothing to give.

“No! No, not like, uh, not like that,” Steve stutters. Drums his fingers against the steering wheel. Nervous. “Not that there’s anything… wrong with that, but, no. Not like that.”

“Okay.”

“More like, your kinda guy.”

“’My kinda guy,” Billy repeats dully.

The light remains red.

“Yeah, like, y’know,” Steve continues, still nervous, face colouring with embarrassment. Still waiting for that light to change. “A therapist, but, like, for my brain, or whatever.”

“A psychiatrist?”

Steve winces at the word, looks away, and rubs the back of his neck.

“Yeah. A psych.”

“Okay,” Billy says again. He doesn’t know where Steve’s trying to take this. A show of solidarity? Some sort of admission?

Steve’s quiet for a moment up until the light finally, blessedly, turns green. The car lurches awkwardly forward in Steve’s enthusiasm to get going.

“Yeah, so, I’ve been seeing a guy.” His fingers never stop tapping, playing out the rhythm of his anxieties. “And we’ve been talking uh, a lot about you.”

“Me?” He’s surprised, then, suspicious. “Why?”

“You keep me up at night.”

But before Billy can ask what the hell that means, they’re there, and Steve’s already wishing him good luck.

*** 

He’s lying in bed later that night, reveling in the fact that it no longer hurts to do so when Max knocks and enters. She’s holding something big and boxy in her hand and looks kind of confused about it. A little awkward.

“It’s for you,” she says and waits for him to sit up and take the bulky two-way radio from her.

“What?” he asks stupidly, turning it over in his hands.

Max shrugs. “He said he wanted to talk to you.”

“Who?”

“See for yourself. Give it back when you’re done,” she says, and then leaves.

He waits to hear her footsteps pattering down the hall, back to her room, before he presses down on the communication button uncertainly.

“That you, Harrington?”

“Don’t cream yourself. Yeah, it’s me.”

A ghost of a smile works its way across Billy’s face at the familiar words. He takes a seat on the side of his bed, holds the radio close to where his medallion used to hang.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t do this in person,” Steve says, his voice coming through in crackles and static. Still legible. Still determined. Billy ignores the pounding of his heart. “When I said that you keep me up at night, what I meant was…”

Billy hears him sigh before trying to finish his thought.

“What I meant was that I kept seeing your body on the floor at the mall whenever I closed my eyes, and not being able to do anything about it. I started having dreams where you actually fucking died or some shit and I got all fucked up about it when I remembered how close we were to being- well, you know. But I couldn’t figure out why that kept happening; it’s not like any of that shit was my fault, right?”

“No,” Billy agrees, swallowing hard. “Wasn’t your fault.”

He thinks he can hear Steve exhale a sigh of relief.

“Yeah, so, I don’t know why but it just kept sticking with me. I started losing sleep because you were always there. I didn’t even know you were involved at all until-”

“Until I tried to kill those kids.” Billy finishes his sentence for him, trying his best to ignore the lump forming in his throat as he says it.

“That wasn’t you,” Steve says quickly, and gives Billy a moment to collect himself. “It wasn’t. But, I thought maybe if I just, I don’t know, avoided you, then maybe the nightmares would stop.”

A slight blossom of anger. He quickly discards it; that’s not what they need right now. “Did they?”

“No.”

The lump in his throat doesn’t go away. He swallows it down, but then it grows and starts to take up space in his chest. It pushes down the anger, and pushes the hurt he’s been internalizing up and out. His eyes grow wet. He blinks the tears back.

“I ignored you for so long,” Steve says in a hushed whisper.

“I know,” Billy replies and tries to keep the hurt that’s threatening to bubble out of his throat down.

“And then Max told me you tried to kill yourself-”

Steve’s voice catches, and Billy can hear the hurt that starts spilling out of him. He’s crying. Billy sniffs and stops blinking his own tears back.

“It was an accident,” he tries to tell him, but his voice gives out part-way through. “It was an accident,” he repeats as he clears his throat. Hot tears begin to streak down the sides of his face. “I didn’t mean to.”

“I didn’t know what to do. I tried to talk to Robin but she said she couldn’t do for me what a therapist could, but I’ve always heard that that shits for crazy people, and I’m not crazy, just miserable and then Max came to talk to me about you again and I just. Saw my chance, I guess.”

Billy holds the radio in one hand and his head in the other. He can feel a headache coming on. Steve rambles on, about how the guilt he feels manifests the horrific visions of Billy lying dead on the ground in that shitty mall and how his shrink suggested that maybe just talking to Billy about it might help.

“I could’ve killed you that night,” Steve says at the end of his rant, sniffling uncontrollably. His voice sounds hoarse, but at least they’ve both stopped crying. “I almost drove right into you.”

“You kinda did. Eye for an eye, though. Guess that makes us equal,” Billy replies, and Steve laughs.

His laugh is cheery despite the dark tones of their conversation. Light. It lifts Billy up.

“It could’ve been way worse, though.”

“Yeah,” Billy agrees, breathing deeply. His eyes feel crusty with dried tears. He wipes at them and feels how sore they are. “Yeah, you could’ve missed. You wouldn’t be so sorry if you had.”

Steve gets really quiet at that. Billy knows that Steve knows he’s right. He would’ve killed them if Steve hadn’t done what he did, but it doesn’t change the fact that it hurt the both of them when he’d had to resort to such drastic measures.

“But I didn’t.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“You survived.”

“So did you.”

“Fuck it. I miss you, Billy. I wasted so much time trying to get over the part of you I thought had died.”

They stay up all night after that. Just talking. Catching up, making amends. Healing.

The conversation only ends when Billy realizes Steve’s fallen asleep on his end. He’d been slowing down gradually as the hours passed, so it doesn’t come as a surprise, but still Billy wishes they could’ve talked more.

And they can, he understands. They can talk the whole rest of their lives away if they wanted to, because they survived. He sets the radio down on the floor beside his bed and slips in between the sheets. He closes his eyes and smiles. They survived.

When he wakes up, he realizes he no longer hurts.

[financiallymint]

Students: I Challenge You to Earn an Extra $1000/Year

Very excited to be sharing this guest post by Tom from This Online World on side hustles and earning extra income. A fellow student all the way in Canada who’s passionate about online marketing, passive income and even crypto! He has a great hustle mindset and his website has a lot of good info on money hacking and earning a bit more $$ – you gotta check him out.

The article is written in dollar signs $$, but simply change the currency and it works just as well. What’s important is the idea!

Starting your own side hustle is one of the coolest ways to increase your income: it’s basically growing your own little money baby.

However, when it comes to the actual work, it can be difficult to know when or how to start. From finding extra time to securing side hustle opportunities, getting the ball rolling on your extra income generation journey requires time and some thought.

For students, it can be especially difficult to find the time or correct side hustle opportunity. Assignments and exams can occupy most of your day, and the nature of student life often equates to a less than stable financial situation.

I am currently in my last year college, and I’ve certainly had my share of cheap beer, instant Ramen, and a lonely bank balance.

However, whether you are in school or employed, wealthy or just making ends meet, skilled in a craft or a complete novice, it is possible to start a successful side hustle that makes you an extra $1,000 a year.

Don’t believe me?

Well, here’s the mindset I want you to approach this side hustle challenge with:

You have 12 months in a year to make an extra $1,000.

That means you only have to make about $85/month of additional income with your side hustles.

When you think about making an extra $1,000 a year as only having to earn an extra $85 a month, it doesn’t seem so daunting.

Personally, I take 1-2 days out of every month to dedicate towards my various side hustles.

It doesn’t matter if you take on a variety of side hustles or stick to a single job. As long as you take an active approach to making more money and stick to a plan, you can succeed.

Let’s take a look at 12 possible side hustle ideas that you can do once a month to make an extra $1,000 a year.

Idea 1: Content Writing Gigs

I’m a staunch supporter of working online to earn extra money, and content writing is always my first recommendation (especially for students).

Content writing can expand your skill set and open the doors for future employment or freelance opportunities (looks great on a CV!). Additionally, content writing jobs are often remote and have incredibly flexible working hours.

I’ve written content throughout my college years, and there are a number of ways to approach securing a content writing side hustle:

Look on job posting websites for companies that are seeking freelance writers (Indeed.com, LinkedIn, Monster.ca are some great ones).

Post your own advertisement on your local job boards or online marketplaces. Offer your content writing services to local businesses in your area!

Create gigs on online websites like Fiverr. There are many freelance writers who use Fiverr to generate income, and most price their content at $5-$10 for every 500 words of content.

Most content writing jobs won’t require you to be an English major or have an extensive portfolio. As long as you are a decent writer, you should be able to find work that pays between $10-$15/hour without a problem!

Idea 2: Get Busy with TaskRabbit

Let’s face it: no one really enjoys chores. However, every job someone doesn’t feel like doing is another side hustle opportunity that can make you some quick side income!

TaskRabbit was started to provide a secure task-based marketplace. By becoming a Tasker on TaskRabbit, you can set your own hours and choose to complete various tasks people are requesting for payment.

Common tasks on TaskRabbit include:

Yardwork.

Moving and packing services.

Furniture assembly.

Home improvement.

General handyman services.

The work you complete on TaskRabbit won’t be glamorous, but it typically pays well (and you are able to set your pay range). Chances are, you could spend a few hours helping someone move or do some yard work and easily walk away with $100+.

Idea 3: Food Delivery

Whether you work for Just Eat, Skip the Dishes, Grub Hub, Uber Eats, Deliveroo or some other delivery service, making money by delivering food is a simple but effective method for making some extra cash.

If your car isn’t too old, simply register to be a part-time delivery driver for a popular delivery service in your town.

You can set your own hours, and it will only take you a few deliveries to make your monthly target of $85. Depending on your town, people might tip slightly more or less, but a single night of work should help you reach that $1,000 a year goal.

Idea 4: Help your Landlord

3 college buddies and I moved into the most grungy, decrepit old student house around town when we started school.

However, part of me is really glad we did. Besides the fact that student living can be hilariously awful, I was also able to find some odd jobs and make a few extra hundred dollars simply by asking my landlord if he needed help.

Hiring professional painters, repairmen, garbage removers, or cleaning services is expensive.Hiring desperate students is not.

Trust me when I say landlords always have projects on the go. Whether you are currently renting or not, finding occasional work for fixer-upper projects is not difficult. Reach out to landlords or look online, and spend a day painting, tearing up carpet, fixing holes in the wall, or cleaning a place.

You can earn an easy $100-$150 for a day of work, and you’ll probably walk away with a newfound appreciation for your own home.

Idea 5: Busk

If you play an instrument or can sing fairly well, busking might be the right side hustle for you!

My housemate and I spent several weekends playing guitar on the street corner of our local downtown scene. We’re ok players, so busking provides us with a great way to bond, practice our songs, and also earn a simple $20-$30/each for a few hours of enjoyable music.

You don’t have to be an incredible musician to busk. However, you will need the ability to get over stage fright. Personally, I prefer busking with my friend since I don’t really want to go alone. But I still find busking to be an enjoyable way to make extra money for something that I would do for free anyway.

Just make sure your town or city doesn’t require a permit to busk (or obtain a permit if you need to).

Idea 6: Tutor

Have you ever looked back at high school/elementary homework and realized just how easy it is (shout out to our developed, adult brains).

Well, if your town or city has a few high schools nearby, chances are you can find some part time work tutoring students in math, science, or languages. In my school, tutors were regularly paid $15-$25/hour by parents, especially in more advanced subjects like calculus or chemistry.

If you have a knack for school and enjoy helping others, tutoring might be the right side hustle for you! Plus, most tutoring sessions only last 1-3 hours, so you can make some quick and easy side income without spending too much time!

Idea 7: Babysit

If you like babies and kids, babysitting is an excellent way to make extra money every month. Half the time the kid will be sleeping, so you’re pretty much getting paid to do nothing. Sounds like a dream!

Popular websites like SitterCity have made working as a babysitter (in the U.S.) incredibly easy. However, if you aren’t a U.S. resident, you can always post your own advertisements on local job boards or just ask around town.

Many of my college friends have been babysitters throughout their life, and it’s a great way to make additional income. Even if you only work for 1 family, you can probably make $85 a month from babysitting once or twice (depending on the length of the job).

Idea 8: Drive with Uber or Lyft

This is a similarly straightforward idea to delivering food (except you’re delivering people). If you have a car that meets Uber or Lyft’s requirements, you can just drive one day of every month and make extra money.

Uber or Lyft might not be a great long term solution due to variability in available rides and the hidden cost of every kilometer you drive (repairs, oil changes, wear and tear), but it isn’t a bad side hustle to do once in a while.

Ideally schedule your driving session around a busy time where you can benefit from surcharges!

Idea 9: AirBnB

I have two friends who have been dating for a couple of years and live in an apartment together. Their place has 2 bedrooms, so once in a while they rent out one of the rooms on AirBnB for the weekend to make some extra cash.

They don’t particularly enjoy having company over, so they usually schedule their AirBnB weekends around times they won’t be home often or there’s an event in town that their visitor will most likely be attending. In any case, it’s an incredibly straightforward way to make $200+ for a weekend of hosting.

If you live in a major city, using AirBnB to make some extra money every month should be even easier. All you need is a decent space, price level, and advertisement on AirBnB.

Idea 10: Reddit ForHire

Reddit is an incredible community, and also presents budding entrepreneurs and side-hustlers with money making opportunities.

r/forhire is one of my favorite subreddits, and it’s exactly what it sounds like: a job marketplace. Users can either post ‘hiring’ or ‘for hire’ posts that outline specific work and skills that are being sought after or offered.

Some of the most popular jobs on Reddit For Hire are:

Graphic design.

Programming.

Content writing.

Video editing.

Tutoring (especially in languages).

Advertising/marketing consulting.

If you have experience in any of these field or have another service to offer, definitely check out Reddit!

Idea 11: Dog Walking

It’s funny how many people buy an adorable companion only to realize they don’t ever want to actually walk it.

Dog walking, like babysitting, is a great way to make extra income just by taking care of a living thing. If you are good with dogs and enjoy the outdoors, consider walking dogs once or twice a month!

Popular dog walking apps include:

WagWalking.

Swifto (New York City only).

Rover.

Care.

coolest side hustle IMO

Idea 12: Slogan Slinger

While this isn’t a concrete side hustle, I couldn’t resist including something fun in this list.

Slogan Slingers is a website where companies request ideas for their next great slogan and have users deliver them the answer to earn money. For example, a plumbing company might post a contest for $250 that explains what kind of slogan they’re looking for, and users can submit up to 3 entries to try to win.

If you win, you get the money. If you lose, nothing happens! The website isn’t incredibly popular, but there is usually a new contest available every other day. 1,000-2,000 people usually enter a contest, but if you have a knack for marketing, it could be a fun website to visit.

I’ve only been slogan slinging for 1 month and haven’t won anything yet, but I plan to keep at it!

Okay, What’s an Extra $1,000?

You might be wondering what’s the point of working side jobs to earn an extra $1,000 a year, but you’d be surprised at how much you can accomplish with an extra $1,000 in your bank account.

Thinking of investing, but never had enough saved up to take the first steps? Use your thousand dollars.

Want to help ease the sting of utility bills and rent? Use your extra thousand dollars.

Or, want to start your own business but need a bit of extra cash to start out? Well, you now have an extra thousand dollars.

I hope you have found this side hustle challenge to be inspiring and provide some effective job opportunities to get started! As long as you take active, baby steps towards generating additional income, you can easily reach a goal of an additional $1,000/ear or surpass it completely.

Best of luck in your side hustle journey!

Read more like this over at Financially Mint

[talabib]

Spend Your Money In A Way That Maximizes Your Happiness. 

In a world where so much attention is devoted to money and happiness, it’s bizarre that the link between the two is so poorly understood. 

Data and research consistently show that happiness isn’t related to how much money you have or how much money you make, but rather on how you spend it. 

This post highlight five principles which show you how to spend your money in a way that makes you happier. While some may seem counterintuitive, each suggestion is highly applicable in your daily life. 

 Cash, cars and luxury houses might seem to guarantee happiness, but it’s not the case. 

Most people assume that winning the lottery would make them happier. They think once they can buy that luxury car or dream beachfront house, then they will truly be happy. Let’s examine this notion more closely. 

Sure, there is a connection between money and happiness. In fact, at least 17,000 academic articles have been written supporting the existence of such a connection, so clearly there’s something to it. 

But we are mistaken in assuming that the connection between money and happiness is linear and automatic; that is, that more money will always make us substantially happier. 

One study showed that Americans typically assume that if their income were to double, from $25,000 to $55,000 a year, they’d be roughly twice as happy. But statistics show that this only results in a 9 percent increase in happiness. So why does having more money not make us as happy as we’d think? 

It’s simple: your level of income has little influence on how much you smile, laugh or enjoy yourself on a daily basis. 

In fact, research has shown that just thinking about wealth can suppress behaviors which would make you happier. In one study, showing participants a photograph of money made them more likely to choose to engage in solitary activities, such as personal cooking classes, rather than social activities which might make them happier, like having dinner with friends. 

So while having more money won’t necessarily make you happier, having money in general isn’t a bad thing. What if the problem actually lies in how you choose to spend your money? 

Things don’t make you happy; experiences do. And the memories you make keep you happy. 

Food costs money. Clothes are expensive. Taxes can’t be avoided. Unless you live on a self-sufficient farm, off the grid and somehow under the federal radar, you can’t avoid spending money to live. So instead of treating it as a chore, how can we spend money so it makes us happier? 

The answer is to spend less on material things such as cars and electronics and use your cash to have experiences, like attending an open-air concert or having dinner out. 

Such advice is backed up by data, too. One survey found that when asked to consider their latest purchases, 57 percent of Americans felt they’d experienced more happiness after spending money on a vacation rather than on a piece of jewelry. Only 34 percent felt the other way around. 

Another study showed that American adults over 50 who consider themselves generally happy tend to mostly spend their money on leisure activities, such as going to the movies, attending sporting events, joining a gym, and so on – all experiences. But what is it about an experience that makes us feel happier? 

Experiences create memories. Each time we enter a concert hall or baseball stadium, we’re filled with sights, sounds and smells that stimulate our senses. Friends or family that participate in the experience help make the memory even more profound, and increase our sense of belonging. A simple object just doesn’t have that sort of influence. 

And when we think about our memories, we’re able to relive that experience and feel happy, time and time again. 

Experiences too don’t have to be expensive or grandiose to be meaningful. Studies show that even when someone has just a little cash on hand, they’ll get more pleasure from purchasing an experience such as listening to a new song rather than buying a cheap product. 

Appreciate the big things by making them bite-sized; frequency equals more pleasure. 

Would it surprise you to hear that most Londoners have never visited Big Ben? Even though this historic landmark is just a subway-ride away, locals just don’t seem to bother. 

This phenomenon illustrates a tendency in human behavior: when something is abundantly or easily available to us, we appreciate it less. 

This means that even your favorite things, like a morning cup of hot coffee, can become less pleasurable if you indulge too frequently. 

The way to combat this is to turn these common things back into special treats. Instead of guzzling 10 cups a day, allow yourself a luxurious afternoon cappuccino only every now and then. 

This way, by limiting your access to the thing that brings you pleasure, you will paradoxically increase its impact. The afternoon cappuccino will start to feel like a reward and will actually make you more happy. 

Another way to increase the pleasure you gain from a treat is to remind yourself how special it is. Don’t just think in generic terms, but consider the details: where the coffee beans were grown and how they were roasted to create the cup’s rich combination of flavors. 

One study showed that car owners increased their appreciation for their vehicles through this approach, too. When a car owner was asked to detail the specific characteristics of her car – its make, model or horsepower – the owner actually enjoyed driving the car more. 

A third way to increase your enjoyment is to divide your treats into small pieces. Studies show that most people would rather experience a greater number of small pleasures than a smaller number of large pleasures. This is because our brain interprets several pleasurable events as being more beneficial than a single, pleasurable event. 

Some companies have figured this out, as can be seen for example in the pricing of a massage at the luxurious Beverly Hills Spa in California. While a 90-minute massage costs $230, three 30-minute massages cost $330, as people get more pleasure from three massages than just one. 

Household chores can be outsourced so you can spend more time on pleasurable things. 

It’s said that money is the root of all that’s evil, but really, there’s nothing intrinsically evil about money itself. Money can be very helpful, giving us more time to pursue our passions. 

Having money can help you save time by outsourcing chores, for example, such as house cleaning to a service provider, so you don’t have to dust and mop yourself. 

With money, you can also purchase time-saving goods. A Roomba vacuuming robot, as just one example of a time-saving good, costs approximately $300. Though this may sound expensive, consider how much time you waste vacuuming, and what you could do with that extra time instead. You could perhaps use that time to learn a musical instrument – something that will give you much more happiness than vacuuming. 

Yet when you’re looking for time-saving goods, don’t spend hours hunting for a bargain that might just save you a couple of dollars. Time is precious! You should be spending that time on activities that make you happy, so spend a few extra dollars and relish the time your choice has freed up. 

Unfortunately, most people don’t seem to understand that money can be used in these ways to increase their happiness. 

Since the 1960s, in most countries income levels have risen, but people are still not using their time in ways that make them happier. In fact, studies show that people spend most of their free time shopping or doing housework, both of which increase feelings of tension and depression. 

So don’t hesitate to outsource or automate activities that aren’t making you happier, and at the same time spend money to enhance activities that do make you happier. 

For example, if you love reading and listening to music, you can buy yourself an e-reader and better headphones so that you get more from these activities. 

Don’t fall into debt; save gradually and savor the anticipation of getting what you want. 

Check your wallet: How many credit cards do you have? We all have a few, perhaps too many. The attitude of “consume now, pay later” is widespread; we expect to be able to buy what we want immediately and then worry about the bills later. 

But when we consider happiness, the opposite philosophy is far more beneficial for us. The greatest pleasure we gain from a purchase lies in the anticipation of that purchase. Studies show that vacationers tend to be happier in the weeks before a trip than on the trip itself. 

Researchers call this phenomenon a “wrinkle in time,” because of our uneven perception of past and future: future events provoke more positive emotions than identical past ones. We might think more warmly of Christmas early in November, than on its memory in January. 

So what does this have to do with credit cards? Simple: Don’t use them. Not only will you be able to enjoy the anticipation of a purchase while you save, but in fact, credit cards are a direct path to debt and sadness. 

Credit cards make it far too easy for us to overspend. One study examined a group of students asked to bid on tickets for a sold-out sporting event. The first group was told they had to pay with cash the next day; the other group could use credit cards. Interestingly, the credit card group bid twice as much as did the group that had to pay with cash. 

This odd tendency is because people believe paying for an item in the future will somehow decrease the misery involved in paying. 

But really the opposite is true: studies have shown that debt decreases happiness. So rather than falling into debt, save gradually and savor the anticipation of getting what you want. 

Spend money on others. It’ll increase your happiness more than if you spend it on yourself. 

 So far we‘ve seen how you can best spend money on yourself to increase your own happiness. But in fact, an even more powerful generator of happiness is to spend money on others! 

 We all have an innate need to give, and satisfying it makes us happy.  This need can be observed in children as young as two years old, and across all countries and cultures. 

 A recent study shows that whether you’re an American college student buying a scarf for your mother or a Ugandan woman buying life-saving malaria medication for a friend, spending money on others produces more happiness than spending it on yourself. 

This is because other people’s happiness is contagious: when we see the smile of someone to whom we’ve just given a gift, we too feel happy. This deepens our connection with that person. 

And yet, many of us are wholly focused on accumulating wealth for ourselves, even though we could be happier by giving some of it away. 

Consider Bill Gates and Warren Buffett, two of the richest people in the world, both of whom have pledged to give most of their wealth to charity. And after donating 99 percent of his wealth, Buffett said he couldn’t be happier with his decision. 

 If you’d like to follow in their footsteps, organizations like DonorsChoose.org make it easy for you to see how your gifts are making a difference. 

The final benefit in donating your money to others is that it also makes you more motivated at work, as you know you’re working for a salary that will make a difference in other people’s lives. So why not spend a little less on yourself and become happier as a result? 

Change your financial habits so you produce more happiness for yourself in the long-term. 

We’ve covered a number of principles on how you can spend your money to become happier. Now, let’s examine how you can apply these principles in your everyday life. 

First, be aware that these principles aren’t mutually exclusive: apply as many of them as possible for the maximum boost to your happiness. 

For example, if you treat a friend to a delicious cappuccino, you’re both giving a gift and spending on an experience – a happiness double-whammy! 

Second, take a look at your expenses and see if you can reallocate some of your spending to happiness-increasing items. 

In 2010, the two biggest spending categories for an average American household were housing and transportation, neither of which contributes much to happiness. Donating to charity, which would produce happiness, was the smallest category. 

To address this, you don’t need to sell your car and give the proceeds to Doctors Without Borders. Rather, just ask yourself if you could move a small sum, like $5 a week, from one category to another. 

Third, start saving money to bolster your finances against potential surprises which could dramatically decrease your happiness. 

Set a solid target, like saving 5 percent out of every paycheck, so that you can handle a surprise expense, like a house renovation. Just make sure that you save in a way that doesn’t hurt your current happiness. 

In these ways you can apply the principles to your everyday spending, and become happier in the long run as a result. 

To maximize your happiness, try to use your money in a way that gives you more time and freedom to do what you want. Buy experiences rather than things, and spend your money on others rather than on yourself. But don’t just buy stuff; savor the anticipation before and revel in your increased levels of happiness! 

 Action plan: Track your spending. 

Devote the next week to analyzing how you spend your money. Jot down every purchase you make and analyze your spending habits at the end of the week. Then consider how you can best change your habits to be in line with the principles covered in this post. Could you spare $5 for a charitable cause? If so, you’ll experience a substantial happiness boost! 

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Rain Rain Go Away Lyrics

Some Quick Advice About Music Downloads You Can Use Now

This article can be of help if you get started with downloading your own music.You can find the music you prefer by using this information.

Check out iTunes if you are looking for great songs. There you'll find a simplistic user interface and tons of music on there that you can download to an iPhone or iPod.iTunes is an excellent place to find great deals.

Be careful of which sites you use to download your music.It's best to use the more established sites and avoid those that may have viruses or a lot of spam mail.Remember that it is always better to keep personal info safe when you're dealing with sites you know nothing about.

A great tip to use when downloading rain rain go away song music is to save as much money as you can by looking out for price promotions. Many times, even offering songs for free.

Make a backup your downloads.Building a library of music can eat up a lot of money as well as time. Losing the fruits of this music would be devastating. Do not expect a download client to give you to download at no cost to you. Use online storage and external hard drives to back up your music.

Remember that you should check the size of a music file before you open it. It's way too easy to mistakenly download something unexpected. This may be extremely dangerous for your computer to deal with. Check to see that the file size before you download.Any individual file that's really large or kind of small needs to be thrown away unopened.

You should make sure any music you download high quality so it will sound the best. Check kilobytes per second.

Google has a great subscription service if you're on an Android platform. It's only about $10 per month, quite affordable.

It is often cheaper to buy an entire nursery rhymes for children album than to collect music song-by-song. This also provides the advantage of you a few extra songs to sample. You can even find a new favorite song.

You ought to look specifically looking for information about viruses and malware. Don't download from a site like this if you see these kinds of reviews.

Preview the music before buying it. You need to be sure that the file is clear and complete before buying it. This really is the case if you buy from a company that isn't well-known. You'll also be sure that you're getting the right song by previewing it.

Only download music from sources that let you preview tracks prior to buying them.This helps you ensure the music's quality download. Many of the larger websites will guarantee their download quality, but smaller ones don't. Previewing each track helps you avoid getting stuck with low-quality music.

Did you realize The Internet  Archive doesn't just for websites? It can also know for hosting a massive catalog of free rain rain go away lyrics songs for download. They wish to archive everything online, which lets everyone benefit.

Are you unsure whether you should download or stream music? It is a difficult decision.

There are quite a few websites that require you to download additional files before you can start downloading music. Reputable, paid services like Rhapsody and iTunes require this, but they are known for their safety.When you deal with some other sites, you shouldn't download any extra programs. Some have viruses that can get into your computer which gives hackers access to your computer.

Buy CDs and support artists receive fair compensation.

Pay for the music you enjoy nursery rhymes listening to. Free music can sound like a siren calling your name, but the quality just won't be there. In most cases, it is illegal and puts your computer at a high risk for getting a virus.

Rhapsody is one of many services available for music downloading music. You get a lot of music legally for a very low price.

It is not hard to add physical compact discs into your iTunes catalog. Just insert your CD into the drive of your computer, check off iTunes for each song, then click Import CD. It takes time, but after a few minutes, each song will be an MP3 on the device you have.

Make sure that you consistently back up each tune that you download. Many of the music downloading sites put a limit on the number of times you can load the tracks, but you don't need to lose what you've already paid for.

Beware of downloads that need you to download lots of file and applications. These are generally from advertisers more control tracking users web-surfing behavior.Try to deselect them and get only the music to be downloaded. If you can't download the music only, you may want to reconsider it.

This can reduce the time it takes to organize things and help keep your library in order as you manually.

You can fix the columns in iTunes easily.Simply right click inside the column title bar and uncheck any columns you don't need. This will ensure only information you actually want to find remains.

If you've only heard a song on YouTube, you're in luck! Online converters allow you input links and download MP3 files. This allows you can find every song you want without overpaying.

Remember that to download music for free is literally taking food out of the mouth of some artists.While it's understandable that you think Madonna and Sting have more money than they will ever need, there are advertisers and producers that are involved in the creation that make less and depend on sales for their wages.

You may want to look into free archiving services that aggregate music from all around the web. These are typically nonprofit sites that aren't for profit and they let people see new artists they may not have know about. Free Music Archive gives you try free music.

If you're looking for the easiest tips on how to download music, your search is over. There are many online music sources that you must weed through to find the best ones. These tips can help you find and access your favorites easily.