#in blood banking we want to be as specific as we possibly can because were using blood products as medicine

[satorugojowidow]

Jujutsu Kaisen ep 160 analysis

spoilers

Kenjaku being Yuji’s mother summary

With the confirmation of Yuji’s mother identity, I can make a summary of what we know and what we still yet to know.

Kenjaku is Yuji’s mother. In episode 160 Kenjaku refers to Yuji as his son, so this assumption is canon now. While Kenaku gender identity is unknown they took the role of mother of Yuji, that is why I’m referring to they as “mother”.

It’s not confirmed but we can assume Kenjaku took over a woman body to give him birth. The identity of this woman is unknown. There is a high chance that Kenjaku took over the body of Jin’s wife: Kaori.

I agree with the idea that Kaori is the most probably option. Is unnecessary complicated put two different women in the story, especially because is a backstory and won’t be tell with details.

In episode 143, Wasuke Itadori (Yuji’s grandpa) warned his son, Jin, about that woman (Kenjaku).

He speaks about Kaori and says Jin couldn’t have a child with her.

He says that Kaori died and, in that exact moment, Kenjaku interrupt saying “what are you talking about?”. I supposed they is questioning the affirmation of Kaori’s death. If Kenjaku is pretending to be Kaori, they would deny her death.

What happened to Kaori?

If Kaori wanted to have a baby with his husband and was unable to do it because some medical condition, is probably she tried many treatments to solve her problems. Maybe after tried all medicinal treatment she didn’t gave up and look for some unorthodox treatments. That is how she met Kenjaku, who was probably occupying someone else body. Kenjaku offers her a treatment to be able to have babies and she accepted. She died due that treatment and Kenjaku took over her body after previously have made some experiments with her (like they did with Choso’s mother). The capacity to give birth was the result of this experiments.

Other option is, Kaori died for any reason and Kenjaku took her body. To Kenjaku deal successfully with Kaori’s death they should take her body when she was in hospital. Is most likely to believe someone miraculously recovered in hospital than someone raising from their grave.

Can be Kaori’s a non-sorcerer? Possible. If Kenjaku target was Jin, Kaori was an instrument to reach him. This could explain why her scar seems healed. She couldn’t resist Kenjaku like Kamo and Geto did because they were strong sorcerer. Wouldn’t be a problem use a non-sorcerer body? Not really, Kenjaku has their own cursed technique.

Kenjaku’s intentions.

Kenjaku is a sorcerer who has lived for over a thousand year, he is being experimenting and trying different things in order to accomplish one objective: evolution. It’s important to think in Kenjaku like scientist more than regular villain who has a very specific goal and master a plan with 5 or 8 steps. There are no steps in Kenjaku’s plans, there is conditions of possibilities. Kenjaku wants to accomplish the evolution, but is not clear how make that possible. Is not like rob a bank. So Kenjaku is being watching, experimenting and learning all those years to found out how to reach their objective. In all those years there are many failures that let they with learnings. As a scientist, every time they fail, he learns something and try different options. So, is possible they tried to create a vessel for Sukuna in the pass and failed. Considering this, Yuji is just a successfully experiment to Kenjaku.

Considering all this, there is must be a good reason why they choose Kaori’s body. So, the question is: they chose Kaori because an ability in her? Or because she was Jin’s wife and they wanted something in Jin’s blood line?

I’m going for the second option. Gege says in the fanbook that Itadori is a medicinal plant. Maybe this choice is a hint about a secret ability running in Itadori’s family that makes their body more resistance or has some kind of ability to heal. Since Sukuna is the king of poison is reasonable to think a vessel that can hold him has to be resistant.

Kenjaku is really trying to help Sukuna?

It’s possible that Kenjaku and Sukuna have a binding. Kenjaku’s part is to create a vessel and Sukuna’s part is yet unknow. But what is interesting is how resistant is Yuji, he tells Yuta in episode 144 he thinks he can deal with Sukuna even with all the fingers ingested. If Kenjaku is looking for evolution, maybe they let some loose ends to allow Yuji to merge with Sukuna and become something else. Some kind of merging that is being stopped by Yuji and Sukuna strong wills.

What happenend to Jin?

I believe he is dead. There is no other explanation for him stepping out Yuji’s life. Probably killed by Kenjaku when he found out something about their real intentions. Or maybe killed is some other experiment.

Talking with Junpei, Yuji says he has no memories of his mon, but he remembers little of his dad. I believe Jin love was strong and, in some way, reached Yuji.

Megumi and Yuji’s parallels

Parent’s issues

Jin Itadori and Toji Fushiguro share similar destinies. Both lost their beloved wives, both handled terrible with their lost, both went downhill due their lost, both loved his children and couldn’t protect them. So, Yuji and Megumi share the similar tragedies.

Hurted by their parent’s absence. Megumi is obviously angry and resented with Toji and he has all the reason for it. At the point he refuses to talk about him with Satoru. That ignorance about his dad’s life put him a poorly situation to understand what is going on around him. In other hand, Yuji refuses to talk about his parents with his grandpa before he dies. Maybe because he is just sad about it and didn’t want to bring more sadness to the last moments with his grandpa. This ignorance put him in a really poor situation to understand and deal with the current situation.

Since the case of Yuta was investigated reaching the conclusion that he shares an ancestor with Satoru, I wonder if Yuji case was researched. There is no information about that. I assumed they did, but at the same time how they didn’t notice anything strange in his parents’ issue? If there are some ancestors like Yuta, how didn’t they find out? My conclusion is they were negligent and assumed Yuji super strength was due Sukuna. Or some ally of Kenjaku covered that research. We know Kenjaku has an important ally in the hierarchy of jujutsu society.

Sasaki and the seal

In the conversation with Kenjaku there is no hint that implied they have a previous agreement and they know each other. But we know the seal of the finger shouldn’t be possible to remove without curse energy. Maybe Sasaki has curse energy (weak) and no technique. Maybe she was able to see curses and that is why she was so found of that. Or maybe there was a binding with Kenjaku that included the clause to forget about the binding (like Yuji and Sukuna).

Suguru’s scar is healed

Its possible that the scar remained longer in Suguru’s case because he was a powerful sorcerer. Considering this, the scar healed means the ritual is complete. Maybe.

It’s possible that Kenjaku used Mahito’s technique “Idle Transfiguration” to finish any possibility of Suguru’s resistance. Since the event in Shibuya where Suguru was able to move an arm, maybe Kenjaku wanted to end all possibilities to Suguru and don’t let loose ends.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

Hi! What is your very specific Twilight AU?

okay, so. New Moon.

party disaster, dumping her and dipping, all happens normally.

but THEN. Bella finds out she’s pregnant.

(and I know you’re thinking- pre-marital sex?!?! Edward would NEVER! but listen. I am the author now. I’ve been around Christians my whole life. shut up!)

so anyway after a million pregnancy tests and a lot of googling about vampire baby legends, Bella’s like...well this is probably gonna be a situation,

Nessie doesn’t have an insane growth rate here because I hate that, so she has a normal amount of time to prepare, and she’s very...aware that the birth is gonna be Rough at best. So she goes to Jacob

who is NOT a wolf yet but Is aware of the pack and the treaty, and they are closer friends already, and she’s like ‘hey. paranormal emergency. you’re the only person in this town who enables me. help.’

 and Jacob’s like I’m Fucking Fifteen and goes and gets Leah, since she’s technically an adult and a girl

(ms. meyer How did you make one of leah’s only 3 character traits ‘upset she’s infertile’ and then not have her support bella’s choices in breaking dawn please make it make sense)

 so they start brainstorming solutions and the best they can work with is. Bella’s gotta ride out the pregnancy in hiding. they have no way of knowing whether she can survive the pregnancy and the only clue they have about whether the baby will be a monster or not is from google searches, but they also can’t exactly take her to an obgyn when her uterus feels like it’s calcified and her ribs are getting broken and she seems to be craving blood

So, Leah’s got her own little place. Bella moves in there, telling Charlie she wants to move back in with Renee (she knows her parents would never willingly call each other so as long as she keeps up communicating with both of them they should be none the wiser of her growing a little dracula in Leah Clearwater’s basement).

Leah has already defected from the wolf pack at this point (because...the Cullen’s left and she didn’t really like any of the guys anyway lmao) so they don’t run the risk of them hearing her thoughts while she’s in wolf form. She goes out and hunts animals, brings them back and her and Jake drain the blood from them so Bella can drink it. All three of them find this extremely disgusting obviously but Jake’s loyal and a little bit lovestruck, Leah’s a supportive friend and queen, and Bella’s just trying to keep her and her baby alive, and none of them feel like trying to rob a blood bank

Bella is 100% certain the baby will just be a baby who happens to like blood, like she was in bd, but the tentative plan is that if a crazy soulless monster comes out of her Leah will...handle that...

Which neither are thrilled about, so Bella’s just trying to focus on staying positive. And between that, trying to survive and stay hidden, Bella doesn’t really have time to...Check Out the way she did in new moon. Like, she’s absolutely still depressed, and she’s still getting an occasional Edward hallucination because carrying a vampire baby counts as reckless in many books, but she’s just more...resigned and pissed than anything. She’ll have days like the ‘possibilities’ scene, but more often than not she’s just telling the Edward hallucination to go fuck himself when he’s begging her to find the real him so they can have Carlisle deal with the pregnancy 

at some point, Seth gets roped into the whole mess (he’s prone to just breaking into his sister’s house) but since he’s like, 13 and The Best Baby Boy he’s immediately supportive. He didn’t even fucking know about the wolves and the vampires until he walked in on a six months pregnant Bella drinking blood while his sister and Jacob are hacking away at a dead deer, but he’s like...you know when you were 13 and sneaking around about Anything made you feel like the coolest person alive? point is he’s helpful

AND he can get away with spending a lot of time at Leah’s house without anyone finding it weird, unlike Jacob, so he starts spending most of his free time there keeping Bella company and brightening her day up

HE is the one who enables her when she comes up with the name Renesmee lmao

(just because she hates Edward doesn’t mean Esme ever did anything wrong!)

“bella I’ll throw you out of this house if you don’t come up with a real name” “leah she’s white you can’t just disrespect her culture like this omg”

anyway these four become the DORKIEST and WEIRDEST little family it’s cute

so then. labor.

it’s less...graphic than in bd because Bella hasn’t been actively dying the whole pregnancy and she doesn’t snap her spine in half, but it’s still. bad.

she essentially delivers a rock that Nessie then begins chewing her way out of. she’s actively bleeding out. Jacob’s having a panic attack. Leah made Seth watch so he would never have unprotected sex and the scare tactic is working. Leah’s covered in Bella’s blood which is not great considering she’s Holding A Rock That A Vampire Is Emerging From

Leah’s been taking classes and researching deliveries so she needs to stitch Bella up and see what else is wrong but Seth is rocking back and forth on the floor crying and Jacob’s screaming and pacing too fast to grab so she’s like. Bella babe I know you’re dying but you need to hold this thing for me ksjdfllksf

so while she’s handling That, Bella’s got this weird little rock in her arms and is watching the baby slowly fight it’s way out like this is a very fucked up egg or something and she’s just. overwhelmed. maybe it’s the blood loss but she’s looking at the messy, scrunchy little face and she’s already in love and envisioning their lives together.

and then, you know, the baby bites her,

she has just enough time to think ‘how did we not think to prepare for that’ before she can feel the venom coursing through her. it’s just as bad as she remembers from James’ bite but somehow...easier to tolerate. she blacks out pretty quickly

the other 3 notice and are like : 👁👄👁

Jacob...literally explodes into a wolf On Spot

Seth darts out the fucking door he’s seen enough for one day

Leah, sole holder of the braincell, realizes Nessie just bit and isn’t drinking from Bella, and deduces this is like...a survival instinct or something. the baby instinctively changes it’s mother first thing. weirdly...touching? 

So she gets the baby and checks that everything is physically okay with Bella (apart from you know. changing species) and is like...guess this is an issue for 3 days from now Leah

more immediate pressing issues: screaming new born baby and oh, yeah, the giant red wolf in the basement,

“Jacob I know this is disorienting but if you break anything in my house I’ll fucking kill you”

she really just leaves the poor boy to go get the baby cleaned up and warm up some of the frozen blood they’ve got in her fridge (RUINING HER TUPPERWARE, BELLA)

she’s not worried about the wolf pack mind meld yet because she knows Sam took the guys on a mission way farther up the coast for a few days and they’ll be too far away to hear Jake. hopefully, by the time they get back, Bella will be awake and they’ll have made an escape plan by then

and as she’s bottle feeding blood to the baby she’s thrilled that it seems to be like...relatively normal and not s horrific monster or anything. mission: unwillingly murder my best friend’s baby has been successfully canceled 

“Oh Goddamn it....Renesmee DOES fit you...”

Seth, from where he’s cowering behind the couch: “told you”

so, Jake eventually calms down, they spend the next few days cooing over Nessie and brainstorming how to handle Bella when she wakes up a vampire, and also nicknaming Nessie ‘Nessie’ because they know Bella will find that intolerable and they feel she deserves karmic punishment for stressing them out so much lmao

so, three days are up. Seth’s upstairs putting on a way-too-elaborate puppet show for the baby with not a care in the world. Leah and Jake are in the basement because they know Bella probably won’t want their wolf blood and their ready to phase in case she gets a little aggressive

but she just wakes up and is like. hey! how’s it going? where’s my baby?

sjdhfksdj they were expecting feral but Bella still has her super self-control. she didn’t even realize she’d changed into a vampire until they told her lmao

Bella’s a little too freaked out to try hunting yet so they give her some of the stored blood they’ve been feeding Ness and she’s like. good to go. Leah’s about to scream like have the elders been exaggerating this whole time or is Bella truly a freak??? lol

So, they spend a couple days just...relaxing, Bella and Renesmee bonding, they’re trying to come up with fun places Bella can move to with the baby so no one she knows finds out, and every now and then Leah and Jake go out and she tries to help him get the wolf thing under control

and then,,,,the pack get back from their mission early

and immediately are able to read Jacob’s mind

so they head over to Start Shit because there’s two bloodsuckers on their land but,

the pack not attacking because Jake imprinted on Renesmee? tired. the pack not attacking because Jake’s Alpha Genes have taken over and declared Nessie and Bella as part of his Pack and attacking would literally start a war? inspired

so they hash the whole thing out....ultimately Sam decides Bella is more of a victim than a threat, and since neither her or Nessie seem to be going on a bloodlust rampage any time soon...he decides to grant them immunity from the whole ‘kill the vampires’ rule. He’ll let her and her daughter stay in La Push as long as they agree to stick to animals and only hunt out of town. PLUS from what little Bella knows about the Volturi, she’s worried about them finding out about Nessie, so they’ll offer protection if that does happen, in exchange for her being able to help them with intel on any other vampire threats in the area (you know like. if a nomad is fucking stuff up in a nearby city, they’ll send her to talk to them first before deciding if they need to intervene. Sam has become acutely aware he has a lot of teens and kids in his pack, so he’s trying to keep them out of fights as much as possible)  

anyway that’s the story of Nessie gaining like 17 chaotic as hell ride or die uncles,

let’s fast forward a bit

it’s like 15 years later. Bella’s not living with Leah anymore, but she’s got a cute apartment in a nearby town, and owns and runs a bookstore on the first floor of it. she got her ged and did college online and teaches night classes at a community college. She’s still in contact with her parents, who Adore the life out of Nessie. She still helps the pack out and they’re all close. Nessie is a handful but in a fun and lovable way. They go on little weekend trips whenever they have time. Bella’s happy.

but then a. Situation. arises.

basically, the Volturi have been made aware of some unknown vampire chasing others out of the pacific northwest and conspiring with shapeshifters. and you know when Aro gets curious he tends to spin things dramatically. who’s to say this vampire isn’t conspiring against all vampires? against them? why has no one’s special talents worked on her? he simply must find out.

Bella and the Pack get word and decide their best course of action for now is to go on the run. they’re not gonna be able to take on a whole army but if they can bide some time and lay low they might be able to figure something out

except Bella is like....I have a teenage hybrid that the Volturi don’t know about yet...it would be EXTREMELY irresponsible to take her with me

but she can’t send Nessie to Charlie or Renee because they don’t know about her...dietary restrictions. She can’t stay with Billy or anyone else in La Push because the Volturi might trace the pack’s scent there and discover her. She’s panicking, they have to leave in a few days max and she can’t find a safe place for her daughter

and then she’s like.....fuck.

she had run into Jasper a couple of years ago- they have the same forgery guy and were heading to his building around the same time as a coincidence. She promised to forgive him for the party incident if he promised not to tell Edward he saw her and that she’s a vampire now. He agreed, but then told her Edward’s been living on his own for a while now and insisted on giving her his number...she never could bring herself to call it or delete it...but now...if she wants to be 100% Nessie is safe and protected...

fuck

So, the past 15 years have been fairly rough for Edward

he’s still convinced leaving in order to save Bella was the best course of action, but like...the vampires canonically mate for life. that’s his soulmate. he’s absolutely miserable without her. he’s thought about cracking and going to find her again but he always talks himself out of it, convinced she’d just tell him she hates him or something

so as stated in his patented Edward Cullen Self Loathing Guide, first thing to do is isolate yourself from all the lovebirds you usually live with. Sure, he keeps in contact, but...not well. he’s currently living alone and posing as a university student. He’s not even really sure what he’s supposed to be majoring in. He’s mostly been in a haze since he left Forks.

and one day....he gets a call from an unknown number. he ignores it, thinking it’s a spam call. but then it calls like 8 more times in a row and he figures answering might be a bit smarter than simply throwing it at the wall

And Edward...swears he came back to life and immediately had a heart attack the second he hears Bella’s voice

He feels breathless and disoriented the whole conversation, trying to figure out if his memory did her voice any justice, trying to rush out 15 years worth of apologies, trying to comprehend she’s actually speaking to him.

But Bella’s very blunt on the phone. She doesn’t want to let herself get emotional. She’s on a time limit, and she has to focus on getting her daughter to safety

And Edward swears he somehow misheard her the first ten or so times she told him. He had a daughter? that wasn’t possible

“she has the audacity to be your Evil Twin so I’m pretty sure it’s possible”

so she gives him a rundown. she needs to go into hiding, no I don’t need your help with that, gives him details about Nessie, what she’s like, what she likes to do, her diet, her favorite color, how annoyed she is by this whole situation, “Edward I know you don’t love me anymore, but I remember how protective you were, and that’s what I need Nessie to have right now. She needs you right now” and Edward wants so badly to refute Bella’s claim of lost love, to tell her he has absolutely no idea how to be a parent, but...her tone is aching so much he can barely speak. He can’t let Bella down again, and he can’t let this little girl he foolishly created and left down anymore than he already has, either.

So he agrees, she tells him to be at the airport in a few days, and hangs up. 

Edward loses about half a day staring at a wall in shock, before he jumps into preparations.

Bella told him while their daughter possessed some speed and strength, hunting was fairly dangerous for her. She was more delicate than his kind, and had a heartbeat. Reheated blood bags had been their best option, and she also needed human food as well. He also had to get a room ready for her- he wandered around stores for hours, reading young girls minds to see if there was any furniture or decorations that were universally liked- which was of course, fruitless, but he did manage to find a handful of things he was sure Bella would have liked at that age, and prayed for the best. He somehow got himself covered in purple paint that was a nightmare to get off. Bella had sent him some forged documents claiming Nessie was his younger sister he’d won custody of, and he got her enrolled in a nearby school. He lived every day leading up to her arrival staving off a panic attack.

it wasn’t until he was on the way to the airport that he realized he forgot to inform his family about this life update. they must’ve been on a hunting trip, because he got nothing but voicemails 

imagine being Carlisle and you come home to a voicemail from your son who’s banished himself from the family that’s just like ‘hi. you’re a grandfather now. I’m having a nervous breakdown and might crash my car. call me back at your earliest convenience I suppose” like what would you DO

 after he gets to the airport he starts panicking again, realizing Bella had never actually sent him a picture, worrying about how he’d find her, but then- he sees a tiny girl with untamed, dark red curls, features strikingly similar to his own that are pulled into the expression Bella always made when she was reading, absently chewing on her lip, and before she looks at him with her mother’s big brown eyes, he already knows who he’s looking at, and he’s certain if he was human his tear ducts would be having a fit right now

Renesmee, however, seems less willing to have an emotional meeting. She mumbles out a simple greeting before gathering up her bags and heading for the door, Edward rushing behind her to try and help

listen. the awkwardness of Charlie trying to connect with Bella. but 10000x worse because of Edward’s overthinking, self-deprecating ass and Nessie being like ‘ah yes the guy who broke my pregnant teenage mothers heart, fantastic’ lmao

the car ride is p a i n f u l. Edward’s trying so hard for light conversation and Nessie’s barely giving one word answers. Bella had warned her about the mind reading so she was carefully keeping her mind blocked, which Edward is trying very hard to be understanding about instead of annoyed, but By God does he want to know everything about her

when they get back to his place, she quietly thanks him for the room and then promptly locks him out of it lol. He spends the rest of the day just pacing back and forth until he realizes he should eventually feed her lmao

and that’s...kinda how the first couple weeks go. she only emerges from her room if he bribes her with food, she awkwardly tries to dodge his questions, he drives her to school and then begs her to tell him how it went when he picks her up, he spends his college classes distracted because he’s freaking out constantly about how to successfully bond with her. His favorite time of day now is night, because she can’t block her mind while she’s asleep, and even if her dreams are all nonsense they’re still...part of her that he gets to know.

His family keeps begging him to let them meet her, but he’s pushing back because if she’s this bad at adjusting to one new family member, how is she going to handle six more?

(meanwhile Alice and Rose started a group chat with her and are having a ball clowning Edward lmao)

wait ksjflksd I think this vine perfectly sums up the dynamic im envisioning  https://youtu.be/wQZIUHNORHg

anyway they....very slowly make some progress. much too slowly for Edward’s taste, but hey.

Like he finds out snacks she likes. or jewelry she likes. stuff like that and just...wordlessly leaves it around for her lmao. he thinks it’s like trying not to startle a deer, Nessie thinks it’s more like a cat trying to gift you a dead mouse, but either way it’s weirdly endearing.

He notices she always has a huffy little frown when he picks her up on Wednesdays. So instead of begging her for an ounce of information of her school life, he asks her one Wednesday morning if she’s excited for the day and she admits she has an elective class every Wednesday with a girl she doesn’t get along with.

He gets her school photos (and Weeps) and realizes apart from her room the home is fairly barren of decorations, so he buys a bunch of picture frames and hangs up the school shots, and some pictures of the Cullen’s over the years, and the few he has of Bella that he could never bear to part with. Other than catching her smiling at the prom picture of her parents, Nessie doesn’t say anything- but the next time he comes home from hunting, there’s a pile of pictures of her growing up on the table, and he starts weeping all over again as he hangs them up

(there’s one of her and Bella hugging and looking at the camera with identical grins and joy in their eyes, he can’t help but put that in his room. He hopes one day he’ll get to see a scene like that in person)

He starts trying to get her out of her room a little more- he still hasn’t managed to a get a ‘favorites’ list out of her, so he starts playing movies Bella loved, to see if any of them lure her out. some do, some don’t- he got halfway through a Lord of the Rings marathon, which was Torture in his opinion, but then Ness came out and quietly asked if he could restart it and suddenly they became his favorite movies ever.

Bella’s not able to contact her on a set schedule or anything because of her situation (and you can bet your ass Edward’s contacted every vampire he knows and ordered them to help her out if they come across her or the Volturi), and Edward realizes that’s probably taking a toll on the girl, so he starts telling her stories of her mother when he knew her in Forks. She’s particularly amused by the blood typing incident- the first time Edward hears Nessie properly laugh, he literally starts crying on the spot

could you imagine the sheer panic if she ever gets so much as a cold

And yes, she’s still pissed on Bella’s behalf, and yes, she specifically blasts 70s music because Bella told her he hates it one time, and yes, if he looks at her like he’s a kicked puppy one more time she might claw his eyes out, and yes, she refuses to introduce him to her friends from school because she Knows everyone will then start asking her about her ‘hot brother’ and she can’t live with that and also can’t live with him knowing that so she told him if he ever introduces himself to any of her friends she’ll set him on fire, and yes, she’s homesick 95% of the time but...he’s growing on her. like a mold, or something.

(okay, maybe when Seth tried to analyze why Mamma Mia is her favorite musical, he might have had a point. half a point. quarter of a point. shut up.)

And Edward’s still trying to not have a panic attack every time she’s out of his sight- he’s got Carlisle keeping tabs on the Volturi for him, and it’s not exactly hard for him to keep track of her through other people’s minds- but she’s so tiny and her heartbeat is Too Fast and what if she inherited her mother’s unlucky streak??

but they’re toeing the line of co-existing peacefully and Edward’s scared to push it past that

then he has to, because it turns out he sent her to one of Those Schools where the parents have to be involved in the school in some way or another and Nessie’s Annoyed

sdkjfsdkjf she keeps trying to get him to just sign up for like pta meetings or something and he’s like ‘I need you to understand you are the only person in this town I actually know or like I Cannot survive around fundraiser moms I can’t’ 

so she’s like ugh fine I’m in the drama club

listen.....Stage Parent Edward Cullen.......the power this holds...

that’s right this whole post was an elaborate ruse for me to make a musical theater headcanon again lmao

no okay but seriously he starts off just helping build sets and stuff like that but then midway through the year their music teacher gets fired and the schools like begging him to take over because they can’t find someone in enough time that’ll know the music for the show they’re doing and he’s like “I need you to understand Nessie will never talk to me again if I start actually working at her school” and they’re like “She also will never talk to you again if we have to cancel the big musical, though” and he’s like. fuck.

silent treatment for a week and a half

lmao so now he’s trying to juggle being an overly-enthusiastic stage parent who’s making costumes and sets and kinda crying backstage when he sees his daughter in her costume with also being the music director for the damn show and trying to teach a bunch of kids how to read sheet music 

one day he ended up in a coffee shop with the hair and makeup moms, gossiping about the cast’s love lives, and he literally doesn’t know how he got there

is it wrong to pass Nessie in class even though she’s putting all the wrong answers on the test but he Knows she knows the right answers and is only answering wrong to try and get a rise out of him

Bella sneaks into town to see the show- they thought it would push their luck if the pack came, but they sent an ungodly amount of flowers and candy. When she snuck into the house while Ness was sleeping she Was Not expecting to find Edward up to his elbows in sequins, trying to fix a bedazzler he accidentally broke in frustration, muttering under his breath about how if Nessie’s romantic opposite in the show doesn’t keep his thoughts clean he’s gonna kill him- and it just cracks her up. She WAS nervous about seeing Edward again but now she’s assured he’s still a dork lol

So Edward freaks when he sees her but they don’t wanna wake Ness up so they’re trying to be quiet but like. they’re going through it 

Like Bella Wants to be pissed at him but she can’t, she still loves him- and while she can’t just get over what he did to her, it’s also not lost on her that ‘leaving to protect someone I love’ is literally what she had to do to her daughter

And Edward....Edward, who only left to give Bella a chance at a safe, human life, seeing Bella in front of him as a vampire, knowing it’s his fault she ended up that way and she had to go through it alone, had to raise a baby herself because he’d made it so hard to find him...knowing if he’d just pulled his head out of his ass he would have been able to be there for her...would be able to form a coherent sentence around his love right now, would have long and fond memories of Nessie’s childhood, likely wouldn’t have to watch Bella hide from the Volturi...he’s back in a self-loathing spiral already

But they haven’t seen each other in so long and they just don’t want to...deal with the unpleasantness right now, so they just push it aside. Bella helps Edward with the costumes. Edward fills her in on what she’s been missing with Nessie. Bella tells him some stuff about when Ness was younger. They just spend the night talking, and it feels like no time has past between them at all- which just makes the heartaches a little stronger

When Nessie wakes up to her mother there she’s ecstatic- bubbly and loud and glued to Bella’s hip all day, giving her in depth play-by-plays of her school and rehearsals and friends she’s made, bouncing on her toes all morning, hyper, giggly, and- it kind of breaks Edward’s heart a little, even though he knows he hasn’t really...earned this side of his daughter, yet. 

(at least he got his wish of seeing their twin smiles in person)

(he wishes he could see them every second of every day)

so the girls spend the day catching up while Edward mostly feels like a thirdwheel, and then they have to get Ness over to the school so she can get ready

Bella decides to hang out around the school theater before the show actually starts- she leans against the wall next to the piano, the two talking in hushed tones while Edward runs through songs. Bella really missed watching him play- the only thing that managed to drag her away from it was when Nessie called her to the dressing room to help with a hair emergency 

she didn’t talk to him much at intermission, her attention being stolen by the rest of the Cullen family (who had been Very Loudly supporting the show so far, she knew Ness was probably dying of embarrassment backstage)

after the show, the three went back to Edward’s and just...talked. Nessie was gushing about the show and eating while her parents assured her she was the greatest actress ever born, simple stuff like that. she fell asleep sandwiched in between them on the couch 

Bella realizes she’s never going to be able to bring herself to leave again if Nessie wakes up, and tells Edward as much. He clearly doesn’t want her to go just yet either, but...she’s on the run, it’s not like she has much choice 

He has so much he wants to say to her but he just- can’t. it’s not the right time. but he’s hoping she can see that in his eyes

Bella shifts Nessie off her shoulder so Edward can hold her, and she gives him a light kiss and says ‘thank you, Edward’ before disappearing in a flash. she needed to go before she lost her nerve.

Edward can’t bring himself to let Nessie out of his arms, so instead of carrying her to bed he just stays there, holding her, trying his best not to think that that could be the last time for a long time he’d ever see his Bella again, trying not to let thoughts of a life he gave up unwittingly consume him

okay I didn’t mean for this to be So Long so I’m cutting it here uhh...let me know if anyone wants a part 2? sorry lmao

[apricotbuncakes]

🏳️‍⚧️ Luigi is Trans Masc 🏳️‍⚧️

Long Post!!!

Now that I have your attention, here are some reasons that I headcanon Luigi as trans, based off of my own experience as a trans masc person.

1) He ghosts hunts even when he has the option to say no.

Could this be a ‘I have to save my loved ones from danger’ or a ‘this is the right thing to do even though I’m scared’ situation? Yeah! But I’m trans and grasping for straws, so let me have this.

I put this as a reason for him being trans, because I believe he’s doing it because he’s a man and he’s ‘not supposed to be afraid’.

Luigi is assumed to be 24, and his character was first introduced in the 1980s, specifically 1983. Assuming he was 24 when the first game released, he would have been born in 1959 (feel free to check my math on that).

Although his character was introduced in the 80s where men tended to be more feminine and flamboyant, he was probably raised with the idea that men should be tough and strong, and should lead. Even if we throw release date and age aside, even if he was born in my generation, those stereotypes of men still exist and are taught within society. Even as those norms are being broken day after day, he would have still been exposed to the toxic masculinity.

Luigi, from what we’ve seen of his adventures, tends to be more scared and less ‘tough’ than what was expected of a man. From what we know of Luigi, we can safely assume that (if he was trans) he would be doing this not only for his family and friends, but to prove he was tough and strong, and that he was manly.

2) He dresses like his brother.

Yes, he is a plumber by trade, but he also ghosts hunts, and makes bank off of that. You think he would wear a different outfit when he ghost hunts simply because denim Isn’t meant for physical activity. Anyone who’s run in jeans knows that it isn’t exactly meant to be stretchy. It’s (supposed to be) designed to withstand the test of time. So why doesn’t Luigi change from plumbing cloths (specifically his denim overalls) to something more suited for the running he has to do in various places for ghost hunting? Because Mario wears overalls and a t-shirt.

From what I’ve seen on social media, other trans people follow the lead of those around them who match their gender identity/their presentation. I would do the same was well. I would look at what my dad wore, what my brother would wear, and what guys at school wore. I developed my style after what I had seen, so I could pass.

While you don’t have to pass to be trans (or even have the desire to), it’s a common theme amongst trans people to try and blend in with cis society. This can be for safety reasons, or just because they want to fit in with their peers.

Luigi clearly looks up to his brother, crying tears of joy whenever Mario is saved from King Boo. He congratulates him when he wins events. He supports him, because he looks up to him. They’re brothers after all!

It makes sense that Luigi would mirror Mario, since they are so close. Since Mario is most often seen wearing his overalls, Luigi follows suit, because it’s what he believes guys do. He’s following the example that Mario set for him.

3) Luigi’s view on gender expression.

Luigi has had a couple of instances where he is known to ignore typical gender stereotypes, specifically with dresses.

In the game super Mario Odyssey, Mario can be seen wear a wedding gown with a veil, and Luigi is only concerned that Mario didn’t tell him about the wedding. There was no wedding, and Luigi didn’t mock Mario when informed that his brother was wearing the gown for fun.

The second major instance is from the New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe website. The website tells us that only Toadette can use the Super crown. The last part of the Super Crown’s description says “Sorry Luigi- Only Toadette can use this item!”

While this could point to Luigi being trans fem instead of trans masc, I would like to point out that recently, it has become more accepted that men can dress feminine. Since this game was released in 2019, it’s completely possible that Luigi has caught onto this, and is becoming more accepted and accepting of his femininity as a man. This would also be plenty of time to unlearn harmful stereotypes from when he was younger, about what men can and can’t do. Although he still sticks with old habits, he’s learning more about how the world around him works, and how it’s changing day by day.

I believe that Luigi has a better understanding of gender and gender expression because he is trans. He’s learning to accept that he doesn’t have to be hyper masculine to be a valid guy.

4) How he got his mustache and flat chest (and… other stuff).

This section will be discussing the effects of hormones, surgeries, and genitalia. Please keep this in mind as you read.

This is more of an explanation for how certain things happened.

How did he grow a mustache? Testosterone. It was likely after helping his brother with his career, and winning sporting events he had a good amount of income to start Testosterone. Another option? Minoxidil. Minoxidil was tested to see if it could cure ulcers in the 50s. Through testing, The Upjohn Company discovered it opened blood vessels and allowed for blood to flow more smoothly. In the late 70s, it was FDA approved for patients to use if they suffer from high blood pressure. Through this, they discovered that minoxidil also has the side effect of hair growth. The FDA approved the product to be sold, and it was called Rogaine. Meaning Luigi would have had access to something to grow facial hair, even if testosterone wasn’t an option.

What about his flat chest?

Binding or Top surgery. Both were an option by the time Luigi was old enough. Laurence Michael Dillon was a trans person who was born in 1915 and died in 1962. While I do recommend you look at more of his story, what I want to focus on is the fact he had top surgery. While the surgery was still fairly early in it’s development, it was possible. Luigi, who wasn’t born until 1959 (as previously discussed) would have the option to get top surgery when he became an adult.

Another option would be binding, though I think this is less likely because of how binding restricts physical activity. Binding in any way makes it difficult to run or exert yourself in general. We see Luigi run a LOT in various games, and for decent amounts of time too. It’s less likely that he’s binding.

The last thing is his penis.

There was a huge joke going around about the bulge we saw in a promotion for Mario Tennis Aces. People were discussing how large it was, and Even Mattpat on Game Theory discussed the measurements to determine how large it was.

Why was it so noticeable? Well bottom surgery was also an option for him pretty early on. Surgeons (from what I’ve been told be social media) will ask how you’d like to look like. Even if he decided to not get bottom surgery, he could be wearing a packer.

A packer is anything you use to give the feeling and or appearance of a penis, specifically used by trans masc people who were not born with a penis. There are many different types of packers (including clean rolled up socks) that people may use. What’s most important to note though, is they have a high chance of moving around.

Even with harnesses or underwear specifically designed to keep a packer in place, they can still shift around in your pants, especially when you’re doing a lot of moving. From my experience, my packers tent to move forward rather than back. Wearing athletic shorts will also make that area more pronounced as the fabric is looser, so if Luigi was wearing a packer, we’d know.

5) He’s trans cause I say so.

Like I said in the beginning, it’s a head canon. I say he’s trans because it’s a cool idea. A Nintendo character that is trans, and isn’t being hidden, explained away, or made fun of (like Vivian from Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door). I like the idea that Luigi is a proud trans guy, and we don’t know because it doesn’t matter. He’s a guy because he’s a guy. He doesn’t just ‘become’ a guy because he goes through surgeries or goes in hormones. He’s trans, and t doesn’t matter if we know or not, because his trans identity isn’t important to the story we’re playing, or our knowledge to know. We aren’t entitled to it.

He’s a guy who happens to be trans, and that’s that.

If there is any misinformation above, please let me know so I can correct it. This was meant to be a fun post about my head canon, but I did use real world examples t explain it, and if I got something wrong, I’d like to know. Thanks!

[young-dumb-and-vaccinated]

Cult Girl: Doctorate (Hannibal x Female!Reader) pt. 6

Positive

Cult girl and Hannibal find a way to turn a life-altering mistake to their favor.

@wisesandwichshark

Trigger warnings: accidental pregnancy, discussion of abortion, adoption, slight emetophobia

Another week passed and the 'hangover' didn't subside. Then a third week passed, so you had to give up the façade and just admit you were sick. Hannibal was smugly concerned, but not alarmed. It paid to have a doctor for a fiancé. Studying could be done from bed and you needed to be in perfect working order to burn down your grandmother's country club and fully enjoy it.

Hannibal wasn't so much of a hypochondriac that he denied you affection while bed-ridden. That, or he didn't believe what you had was contagious. Whatever it was.

It wasn't until you woke up late, just days before the start of the new semester, that you discovered. You hobbled blindly to the bathroom to take your medicine. You were fully prepared to drop to your knees and vomit in the toilet and you wanted nothing more than to return to bed and slip back into sweet unconsciousness. Not even microdosing meth could keep you awake.

You slid your birth control packet out of its sleeve. You were halfway through the green placebo pills, so you were sure that didn't help how miserable you felt. This period sure had a hell of a build-up.

That's when a number caught your eye.

It was a number you weren't even previously aware existed. A date on your birth control packet. Dated three months prior.

You weren't lucid enough to comprehend what it meant, but once it hit you, you spit the pill into the sink.

Expired. You thought. How the fuck do pills expire?

No. No. No. No.

"[F/N]?" Hannibal said. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah." You called back. "I... just need to take a shower."

You turned the faucet on. It was a bad lie and he would figure it out eventually, but you couldn't involve him. Not yet. You needed a minute alone to think.

You found the pregnancy test you stashed under the sink all those years ago. You double-checked the lock, then began the test. There was no romantic or even palatable way to describe the process of peeing on a stick, quietly as possible, to avoid your frankly terrifying fiancé's notice. Once it was done, you wrapped the still-loading test in toilet paper and shoved it back under the sink.

You had no idea how long it would take to give you a result. Or if waiting four years to use it would give you a false result. There was so much you didn't know.

You jumped into the shower and washed up, trying to push all thoughts of panic out of your head. It didn't work. You went right into bury-the-body mode. A fall down the stairs could best pass for an accident, but had the unintended consequences of severe bodily harm. You wondered if those special herbal teas actually worked and where you'd find one. Or, instead of investing in gimmicky, pseudo-scientific abortion teas or throwing yourself down a flight of stairs, you could just talk to him.

You sat on the bathroom floor in a towel for what felt like hours, holding the mummified pregnancy test between your fingers. It took all your strength to rip through the tissue paper and confirm what you already knew.

A big, obnoxious pink plus sign. Almost like it was rubbing it in.

Your head was screaming just talk to him. He was your goddamn fiancé. The man you were going to spend the rest of your life with. But you couldn't tell him. Not after what he said at the country club.

"Hannibal?" You called out, voice weak. "Can you come here, please?"

He opened the bathroom door to find you huddled against the sink wearing nothing but a towel. It was a sight that would make anyone freak out.

"My god, [F/N]." He took a knee beside you. "Are you hurt? Did you hit your head?"

You gestured to the pregnancy test at your side. You hugged your knees into your chest and waited for him to process everything.

He looked at you with an unreadable expression. "I thought you were on birth control?"

You covered your face with your hands. "I did too. Nobody told me that the pills actually expire."

Then came the question that you were dreading.

"What do you want to do?"

That was why you were hesitant to tell him. Not because he would try to make a decision for you, but because he wouldn't.

"I don't know." You blurted out. "What do you want to do?"

Hannibal raised his eyebrows. "You know I can't tell you that. You need to decide for yourself."

"That's what I was afraid you were going to say." You threw your head back in exasperation. "I'm just asking for a little direction. You said you definitely wanted to have kids-"

"Not like this." He cut you off. "Not when it would derail your entire career.” 

“Look, you know I was on the fence about having kids at all.” You rambled, just trying to collect your thoughts. “But then you described what you wanted for us and it just sounded so nice.” 

“Darling, I am begging you,” He pressed his fingers to his temples. “Please, decide for yourself and only yourself.” 

“I’m trying!” You objected. “I just need a second to think.” 

“Don’t think, just answer.” He implored. “What do you want to do?” 

“I want to get an abortion.” You blurted out before slapping your hand over your mouth. 

“Was that really so hard to say?” Hannibal asked, voice broken with relief. Relief of what, you couldn’t place. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact with him. “It was, a little.” 

“Why?” He tilted his head curiously. “And please don’t say it was because of me.” 

“I don’t know.” You shrugged, hiding your face again. “I just learned I was pregnant, like, five minutes ago. I shouldn’t be expected to make a choice this massive without at least ten minutes to think about it.” 

“Do you really want to get an abortion?” He asked. 

Your voice wobbled with uncertainty. “No... yes?” 

“I see.” He said, as if this were just a point of academic curiosity that didn’t involve him whatsoever. “Is there a part of you, no matter how small, that wants to see the pregnancy to term?” 

“Well, yeah. Thus the basis of my uncertainty.” You threw your hands up. “But I also know it’s insanely unrealistic to think I could just speedrun my last two years of school and however long it takes to establish a career just to get to the domestic bliss.”

“You would do good to not expect motherhood to be a blissful retirement plan, love." Hannibal gently scorned. "Parenting takes just as much commitment as your studies. Likely more."

"I know." You bashed your palms against your forehead. "I said it was unrealistic, didn't I? Look, I just don't foresee any worthwhile outcomes if I carry this pregnancy to term. Even to put it up for adoption just seems selfish. Why bring a kid into the world just to set them up for a shitty life?"

Hannibal paused, and looked off into the distance pensively.

"If you could forgive me a hypothetical," He began. "What if we could guarantee them a wonderful life?"

"Are we talking philosophy, or do you have an actual suggestion?" You probed.

"A bit of both, depending on where your mind takes you." He smirked as if he were about to say something very clever. "What if Beatrice [L/N]'s estate made sure our child had a safe, comfortable upbringing? With a weighty college trust fund in their name, naturally."

You couldn't tell if this was brilliant or insane. It all depended on how 'hypothetical' the whole situation really was. Either way, you were interested.

"Go on." You urged, letting the idea slither into your mind.

"There's nothing in the will that specifically states we must raise the child ourselves." He recounted. "Only that it must be of blood descent."

You hadn't considered that, but it made sense once you heard it out loud. Your grandmother had many skills to make her a sharp manipulator, but her inattention to detail was always her downfall.

“Forty-five million extra dollars in the bank would be nice.” You said. You were humoring him at first, but when you said it out loud, it rang true. 

“Forty-five is drops in the bucket compared to what we can get from her property.” He added. “The house and the golf course.” 

You put your hand on your chin, actually, seriously considering it. You were on the precipice of inheriting more money than you could possibly spend in one lifetime. Money that could make so many problems go away overnight. Money you could hand out to anyone you wanted to, just to make their lives a little easier. You pictured yourself giving waitstaff six-figure tips, or handing a hundred dollar bill to someone asking for change on the street. You could erase your best friend's college debt as a birthday present. Get Hannibal a proper gift. All with money you bled out of your abusers.

It was divine justice. All at the price of nine months of your life.

"So..." Your voice trailed off. "We just need to keep this thing alive for the next nine months..."

"We can find an adoptive family in that time." Hannibal nodded along. "And we can set up a college fund for the child to be given to them on their 18th birthday."

"And we could make the adoption open, in case the child ever wants to meet us." You said.

"Right." He agreed. "Allowing the option for an adoptee to meet their biological parents is much better for their mental health and adjustment."

You covered your mouth with your hand, only to hide your excitement. "I take it back, I'm starting to see a positive outcome."

[shiroganeryo]

Komui's Discussion Room content (DGM 27)

Volume 27 has been released recently here in Brazil and I realized the remaining of Komui’s Discussion Room were nowhere to be found in English, but after reading all of it, I thought there are very interesting things hence why I wanted to share!

Please bear in mind this is not a direct translation, but a summary.

I have a lot of criticism when it comes to Viz Media’s release (official English), but I’m quite content with the work Panini, the distributor of D.Gray-Man in Brazil, has done so far with the official Portuguese release. If there are any mistakes, please bear in mind I translated the information directly from their version.

There are 11 questions covered in this summary. For the others, please check Jeidafei’s translations on them (totally recommend it!): Part 1 | Part 2 | Author's note & Thanks Corner | Extra

Without further ado, let’s get into it! This got very long.

≫ Kanda hasn’t reached the “critical point” in synchronization yet (+ why Allen isn’t a General)

In the question “How did Kanda hide having gone past the critical point”, Tiedoll answers that he actually has the potential it takes to do it but hasn’t done it yet. Still on the same question, they answer a related question about Allen’s critical point: “If Allen has reached the critical point, why wasn’t he appointed to become a general during the Order’s reconstruction?”

Allen replies that it was impossible at that time since Central was keeping watch over him. Tiedoll adds that he’s also too young and the only one able to operate the Ark, the latter making Central even more suspicious of him. General Cross’s reputation also seems to have played a part in this, having the higher-ups deem Allen as someone they couldn’t trust enough.

Ryo’s note: Allen thanks Tiedoll for putting his thoughts about Cross into words and Cross simply laughs it off. XD

≫ Sleeping positions

They get asked about their sleeping positions. Tiedoll describes how Kanda sleeps with detail (when younger, in fetal position; nowadays, he sleeps lying on his side, preferentially the right side).

Allen comments that Johnny sleeps sprawled on the floor or the desk and that everyone in the Science Division sleeps like this; when he first saw it, he got concerned thinking something tragic had happened. Johnny says it’s comfortable to sleep like this, but Allen isn’t so sure.

Cross comments on how Allen sleeps; he mentions he likes to sleep hugging something and when he can’t do it, he complains until falling asleep. Allen gets flustered and claims that he got used to sleeping with Tim because he used to be big, but is over it nowadays. Johnny remembers Link used to tell him not to sleep with the piggy-bank, to which Allen replies that it was “not a sleeping position, but survival instincts”.

Kanda comments on how he brought a ton of food to the infirmary one time and says it was annoying to listen to him eating nonstop. Allen replies with sarcasm (“sorry for needing to eat to recover my energies”).

Cross sleeps naked, with his arms open (according to Allen).

Tiedoll sleeps on his stomach, blanket over his face.

Ryo’s note: The time Kanda is referring to is in Chapter 135 (135th Night: Repose, Partly Cloudly).

≫ The symbol on the CROWs' foreheads

Cross replies that it’s probably the compulsory mark of the procedure that transforms regular people in CROWs. Tiedoll says that Cross knows a lot, as expected of someone who’s able to use magic –he shrugs off the compliment – and Kanda asks when and how exactly someone like him learned it. He angrily says he didn’t learn it anywhere and ends the question at Allen’s remark that he always gets angry when people ask.

Ryo’s note: This is interesting. Could imply he was the one to teach magic to Nea (and the Earl himself?), and not the other way around. But, it’s also possible he just didn’t want to answer.

≫ “What is something you find impressive on the other, but have never admitted?”

Johnny decides to start with Kanda and Allen, and the two exchange insults for several lines.

Johnny then passes the baton to the Generals, who do the exact same as their apprentices.

Johnny ends the question with a thank you and sweating nervously.

Ryo’s note: By “insults”, I mean things like Kanda calling Allen a crybaby, and Allen saying Kanda’s dumb. Tiedoll calls Cross a delinquent; Cross calls him “doting dad”. The list goes on…

≫ The time Kanda spent with General Tiedoll right after becoming his apprentice (+ Allen’s time with Cross)

They are asked what was the most outstanding episode from such a time, and Kanda absentmindedly says he forgot. Tiedoll seems disappointed, stating they had made so many marvelous memories together, to which Kanda replies “please stop talking in this weird way”.

Allen asks how the travels were, and Tiedoll says the most important at that time was to take care of mending Kanda’s heart. They spent much time talking about amenities, having contact with plants and animals and admiring beautiful landscapes. Tiedoll believes that getting in touch with beautiful things can help to connect with the world, despite carrying the burden of being a Second; he wanted Kanda to feel like regular people feel about the world.

Johnny and Allen are touched, and the latter comments how jealous he is. Cross then reminds Allen of how many bedsheets he had to wash because of him, making him flustered. He then goes on to remind how not only he did that but also had to feed him – Tiedoll comments on how it seems impossible to imagine Cross doing all that – and even help him change many times.

Allen’s embarrassment reaches the maximum and he threatens to beat Cross if he keeps talking about that.

≫ Stories of when Kanda and Lenalee were little

Kanda tries to shrug the question off, but Johnny insists they answer. Tiedoll says that the two of them were really cute, just like two lilies that bloomed inside the gray scenery of the Order; Kanda tells him to stop.

Allen is uninterested in Kanda, but wants to hear about Lenalee. Cross asks him if he likes her, and says he thought he had a girlfriend in the Asian Branch already. Allen denies it and says both LouFa and Lenalee are his friends; Cross laughs, saying he doesn’t judge, and Allen nearly snaps in irritation (again).

Johnny moves on to answer the question; Kanda is against it, but Tiedoll holds him in place. Johnny tells that Jiji told him that at first, Kanda would be asked if Lenalee could train with him, but he would shrug her off saying he didn’t want to train with a girl, which would make her cry.

Every time Kanda made Lenalee cry, she would run off to Reever. In reality, Johnny thinks she wanted to talk to Komui instead, but she thought he was busy and didn’t want to bother him, resulting in her crying at Reever’s desk. Tiedoll and Allen are weeping at it (they thought it’s cute).

While Reever comforted Lenalee, Marie would appear bringing Kanda along, who had no idea how to apologize, while Lenalee would bashfully hide inside Reever’s lab coat. This kept happening until he eventually accepted to train with her.

Johnny starts telling another story involving Kanda’s meditation and Lenalee coming back tired from a mission, but Kanda interrupts him. Allen says it’s being fun and tells him not to bother.

Kanda tells him to shut up, calling him a bedwetter. Allen snaps (again).

Ryo’s note: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

≫ “Who amongst the Noah would Allen best go along with? Hypothetically speaking.”

Allen and Kanda are worn out from fighting (see the previous question); Johnny is giving them calming tea. Tiedoll says that it seems Allen and Tyki Mikk looked friendly when talking to each other, and Allen interjects saying they’re not friends and that Tyki doesn’t respect the notion of personal space.

He then goes on to say he doesn’t imagine himself being friends with any Noah because they lack common sense. Cross mentions Road and how she’s always being flirty with him, which makes Allen tell him to stop implying things, while sounding unsure about being friends with her or not.

Johnny asks if Allen is embarrassed and reminds Road kissed him. He denies being embarrassed and says that kissing is just a form of greeting for her (he’s sweating nervously while saying so). He adds that, on top of that, he feels like Road sees someone else when she looks at him.

Cross seems amused.

Ryo’s note: This answer is very interesting. It seems to confirm the theory that Road had some kind of connection with past!Allen. We won’t know for sure until it’s revealed, but it does seem to imply such a thing.

≫ The taste of Innocence + the Crystal Type Innocence + Exorcist supplies + Cross suspiciously knowing about the Bookman clan

A reader asks how did Innocence taste like when liquefied; Kanda says it tastes like nothing, similar to water.

Johnny points out the wounds that formed after their Innocence became Crystal types and if they don’t hurt. Kanda says that at the time they don’t, but such wounds won’t heal even with his healing ability – which he concludes makes sense since it’s from where the blood comes out to form the weapons.

Johnny mentions that the Science Division (Komui, more specifically) made Lenalee pills that will prevent anemia. Still on that subject, Allen remembers people had asked what goes inside the bags the Exorcists carry on their uniforms. Johnny says they carry first-aid kits, disinfectants, anti-hemorrhagic meds, and things of the sort. Miranda and Timothy carry sweets with a high intake of calories, Krory carries Akuma blood sweets and Lavi and Bookman asked for migraine meds.

Tiedoll says they are nothing without the support of the Science Division and thanks them. Allen asks about Lavi and Bookman getting migraines. Cross mentions it’s probably from an occupational disease because storing that much information and memories can wreck your head over time.

Allen comments again that he seems to know a lot about the Bookman Clan, and that it’s very suspicious. Cross magnificently shrugs off the question.

≫ Allen’s cheating

Allen gets asked if he becomes bad at luck games (i.e gambling) in case he doesn’t cheat. He says that a bet on luck always rewards something even if gains are small, but Johnny says he’s really bad at things like rock-paper-scissors. Kanda thinks he was just in denial about admitting he’s unlucky.

When scolded by Kanda, Allen says it was a matter of survival and that he never cheated good people on; just bad people.

Johnny says living like this is dangerous and that he should stop; Allen apologizes and says he needs money, and if anything, he can use his Innocence.

Cross is amused and sounds proud. Tiedoll regrets Cross’s influence on Allen.

≫ About Link

Allen gets asked if he has ever seen Link smile, to which he responds he has tried making him laugh/smile, but never could do it. Johnny says that everyone from Central is very serious, especially Link. Tiedoll thinks that it might be forbidden to smile when their superior is Director Lvellie.

Allen goes on to ramble about how Link complained about everything: when he had food on his face after or during eating, asking him to redo reports because they were illegible despite Reever being able to read, scolding him for not drying his hair after going out of the bath because he could get a cold, and how he was a shame for not folding his uniform properly before putting it away.

Cross asks him, “what was he? Your mother?” and Allen says he didn’t get annoyed at him. He wonders if all moms are like this.

Johnny says people were worried when he was assigned to watch Allen, but in the end, Link went along well with everyone and confirms that Allen liked him as well. He also states that Allen’s reports became a lot easier to read thanks to him.

Ryo’s note: Ladies, gentlemen, and non-binary folks: it’s Link appreciation time! *tips hat* Also Allen wondering about how mothers treat their children was just precious, even if it’s a throwaway comment.

≫ The vibe at the Black Order

In the question “Who runs faster, Komui or Reever?”, Johnny says that he thinks Reever is faster; Allen adds that Komui cheats by using Komurin, though. Kanda gets annoyed and tells them they (at the Science Division) should make Komui behave accordingly to his role. Johnny sniffs and says that they try.

Tiedoll says that it’s actually good that Komui is cheerful because the Order used to be a very different place until he took over the post, and that he (Tiedoll) disliked the gloomy aura it used to have. Allen remembers Lenalee commented about it once and asks if the Order was really this different back then. Tiedoll says that even if it’s been built with a noble purpose, human beings aren’t perfect and a lot of things get distorted over a hundred years. He recommends Allen to ask For about it, as she has existed ever since the Order was founded and protects it to this day.

Allen is sad and comments he wants to visit the Asian Branch again someday. Johnny says he’ll go with Allen, but the latter says he would want to eat Jeryy’s food again before that. Cross sneers and wishes good luck.

They wrap it up at this, and both Kanda and Allen look very happy about being done with the Discussion Corner (as noted by Johnny). Tiedoll bids Cross adieu, and says “rest in peace, Marian” – to which he replies “don’t treat me like a ghost”.

Allen says he knows Cross is an illusion created by his weakness, but that he was happy to see him (in reference to the 222nd Night: Searching for A.W - Hypokrisis). Cross tells him not to exaggerate.

Johnny is content that they could finally keep it to the ideal number of pages – something the Discussion Corner is known to usually have trouble with. Tiedoll says that if they had gone overboard, the next issue’s Discussion Corner would be canceled, and wraps up thanking everyone who has cared about Yu so far and asks that people keep cheering for him.

Johnny thanks the readers for sending their questions. Allen and Kanda are relieved it’s over.

Ryo’s note: And that’s it! Man, this got LONG. Thank you very much for reading until the end. Can’t wait for the next Discussion Room, the way Tiedoll worded it makes it seem like it’ll be on the next volume, 28. I’m excited!

If you're interested in seeing more DGM content from me, feel free to check my masterlist here.

[shreddedparchment]

A World of Our Own Pt.09

Paradise Lost

10/09/2020

Pairing: Bucky x Reader          Word Count: 5,013

Warnings: fluff, depression, anxiety, implied sex

A/N: Hopefully this isn’t too much of a mess. Life got me busy and I didn’t get to put this out when I wanted to. If you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work. xoxo

“Hello? Yes, how can I help you?” Her voice is still a bit on the nasal side, her hair an ice blonde. Her eyes are emerald green and her lips as red as a ruby.

She doesn’t seem to remember you one bit. It has been ten months and you’d only met her once.

“I’m Y/N? I have a meeting with Mr. Swan?” You muster up all your courage after that initial hesitation, intent on completing your mission.

“Oh, right. The no-show.” She gets up and gestures for you to follow.

Quickly you hurry to catch up, watching the way she swings her hips as she walks, the movement exaggerated by the tight gray pencil skirt she wears.

She’s surprisingly fast on her six-inch heels and you’re dumbfounded by the skill.

Stopping at the end of a long modern hallway with black marble walls, the secretary knocks on the pale wooden office door, waiting a moment for response.

“Come in, Kay.” A surprisingly young male voice speaks.

Kay steps in, stopping with her back against the open door as she leans her weight on the doorknob.

“The no-show is here for you.” Kay says, voice casual and relaxed despite the fact that she’s speaking to A.I.M.’s CEO.

“Oh? Hi!” He greets as you cross into view.

He’s most definitely young. Mid to late twenties. No way he’s older than thirty, with short and carefully styled brown hair, brown eyes, and browned peach skin. His chin is blanketed in rough stubble and two dimples crease his cheeks as he moves towards you with his hand extended.

“Y/N, right?” He asks and you quickly take his hand and shake it.

“Yes.” You agree. “Nice to meet you.”

“That’ll be all, Kay. Can you order my lunch for two o’clock?” He asks, releasing your hand but gesturing the red modern armchair in front of his long glass desk.

“Will do.” Kay agrees and leaves, shutting the door behind her.

Mr. Swan rounds his desk, long and lithe, moving to sit in his chair and takes a moment to breathe in and release it slowly, as if it’s the first time he’s sat down today. When he’s settled, he gives you a smile and places his hands on his lap.

“So, you’ve been out of town for ten months?” He wastes no time getting to his point. “Unfortunately, Y/N, I don’t have a position open for you. We’ve just filled all the open positions in marketing and taken on all the interns we could use.

“If you wanted the job, you should have shown up. You were hired. I can’t save your spot just because you decided to take an extended vacation.”

“I-” Your heart is pounding, your blood boiling. There’s a buzzing in your head because you know you can’t say what you want to. You can’t tell him that you were stranded on an island with Bucky because it’s a secret. Not that he was stranded, but that you were there.

“I’m sorry to waste your time. Really. If you’d like to reapply, we’ll keep your application on file and should a spot open up, we’ll keep you in mind.” Mr. Swan assures you.

“Mr. Swan,” You begin, forcing yourself to give him a smile. Tight and humorless, it’s more a desperate gesture than anything else. “I didn’t extend my vacation, there were problems with my passport and travel visas. I was stuck in an airport for several weeks before they put me up in a hotel until they could figure out what the problem was.

“I-I’m not asking you to give me the same position. I know that I’ve lost the chance for that, but if you could give me a job anywhere in your company, I can research my butt off.” You say rashly. “I’m not an idiot. Research and Development would be a good fit too, or maybe consumer research?”

“I’m sorry.” He shakes his head, “I don’t have anything for you. Begging for a job won’t get you one.”

“Mr. Swan-”

“Look, I have a lot of work to do. A company to run. And I’ve given you my answer.” Mr. Swan rises, reaching to refasten the button on his suit jacket. “If you don’t mind? I humored you because Pepper gave me a call to hear you out, but I’ll have to be more wary granting favors for friends. If you’ll excuse me?”

You don’t even have the chance to get up before he’s moving around to the door. He opens it up and leaves, disappearing to the right.

A moment later, Kay moves in and stops when she sees you.

“Oh, you’re still here? You should leave before he comes back. He’s an asshole but that was him being nice.” She explains, moving to his desk to drop off a thick yellow notebook.

When she turns, she stops by the end of the desk, looking at you pointedly.

You get up without word, moving out of the office feeling like there’s fire in your veins.

Loading the elevator, you turn and press the ground floor button. The cold air that blows from the ceiling sends a chill down your spine and it’s the push you need to knock you out of your daze.

As the doors shut and Kay takes her seat behind her desk, your rage overflows into one loud exclamation of, “Fuck!”

~~~~~~~~~~

“How long is this gonna take?” Bucky wonders, turning to Sam who sits beside him, relaxed as he lounges in his seat.

Bucky isn’t so unconcerned, sitting straight with one hand on his bouncing leg and the other balled into a fist on the table.

“I’m sorry, Sergeant Barnes, do you have somewhere else you need to be?” Fury asks, strutting towards them before stopping at the head of the table.

“Yes.” Bucky says, no fear or regret in his voice. “Y/N had a meeting with the head of A.I.M. today, to see if she could possibly get her job back.”

“Guess the money in her bank isn’t enough incentive to stop working?” Sam guesses.

Bucky shakes his head. “She wants to get back to normal if she can. We both do. But she’s having a harder time than I am. This means a lot to her.”

“Unfortunately for you and Miss Y/L/N, I’m afraid Augustus Swan is a grade A asshole. I don’t think she’s going to come away from that meeting happy.” Fury says, pulling out his own chair to sit.

“Then we need to make this quick.” Bucky nods, leaning both elbows on the table.

“I’ll dictate how long this debriefing will run, Sergeant Barnes. Rush me and I’ll keep you here all night.” Fury threatens.

As Bucky frowns, ready to argue, Sam meets his eyes and as he swings his chair around to face him, he shakes his head to calm him and then swings it back to face Fury.

“What do you wanna know?” Bucky sighs, leaning back once again, defeated by Fury’s iron stare.

“Well, for starters, when did you notice that things weren’t exactly right on that plane?”

~~~~~~~~~~

“You were lucky.” Sam admits, walking beside Bucky at a casual pace despite Bucky’s desire to be with you already. “If that stewardess hadn’t moved you and your Mrs. to the front of the plane, you’d both be dead.”

“Yeah.” Bucky agrees, wringing his hands with anxiety. “Were you able to find him? The stewardess’s husband and son?”

“In Texas. They were in contact with the airline but even the airline didn’t know what happened so, Ross filled in the blanks without actually owning up to the responsibility of it. Blamed it on malfunctioning engines.

“They didn’t take it so well. They’ve been paid off, but that hardly makes up for the years that kid is going to live without his mother.” Sam grieves, feeling for the family.

“I’m glad they at least know.” Bucky admits. “Y/N will be glad to know they’re able to mourn her properly. She won’t be happy but at least her heart will ache a little less.”

“She’s a good woman, Bucky.” Sam reaches over, clapping his partner once on the shoulder. “But she’s got you wrapped around her little finger.”

Bucky’s mouth turns into a small hesitant smile, shaking his head.

“Like, she’s got you whipped, dude. Whipped!”

As Sam laughs, Bucky follows, relaxing a little and grateful for the levity.

“You say that like it’s bad thing.” Bucky throws at him, but Sam takes his hand back and gestures his denial animatedly.

“No, I never said that. Honestly, anyone who says being whipped is a bad thing obviously never got it right.” Sam shrugs.

“You sound like you know what you’re talking about.” Bucky pretends to be thoughtful. “How’s that possible when you’re single as hell?”

Sam stops walking, fixing Bucky with a glare before he nods, looking betrayed.

“Alright, I see how it is. Don’t forget I owe you a tracking chip, Barnes. I will literally implant one in your ass.” Sam threatens, but Bucky can only laugh as he stops to look back at him.

Sam smiles, and for a moment Bucky can swear he looks almost grateful to have him back. Although he’s opted to take a break, a long one so that he can build a life with you before he goes back to work, he suddenly feels eager to return and really get to know his new partner.

“Will you come over for dinner next week? Once we’ve had a chance to settle in?” Bucky takes a step towards the three-story townhouse, a lovely pale sandstone exterior with dark gray highlights around the windows and teal front door.

You’d chosen the color specifically and though you didn’t explain it, he knows you’d picked it because it reminded you of the waters around the island.

You had loved your morning swims. It’s only natural that you miss the water if not the isolation. And yet, now that you’ve both been back, he sees you timidity as you walk out into the world and it makes his heart ache.

“Depends.” Sam quips, “You cookin’? I don’t wanna get food poisoning.”

Bucky shakes his head, smiling. “No. Y/N will be cooking. She’s got it all planned and the menu all thought up. She’s pretty excited about having you over actually.”

“Then I’ll definitely be there. Tell her I’m looking forward to it and I hope things are okay with A.I.M.” Sam’s well wishes give Bucky a warm feeling in his chest.

His two worlds are one in this moment and he appreciates the generosity that Sam has had welcoming you into their group.

Bucky wants to keep you as far away from the danger as possible but seeing as you’ve already been blown up on a plane because of him, he’s grown accustomed to the idea that he can’t ever keep you one hundred percent safe. He’ll have to take it day by day.

“Thanks, Sam. That means a lot. I’ll tell her. Hey and uh…maybe you should ask Sharon to come? Y’know…”

Sam quirks an eyebrow, his face full of wonder at Bucky’s audacity.

“…as your date?” He finishes, an amused smile overtaking his handsome face as he turns up and takes the steps two at a time.

“That’s not funny, Barnes!”

“It wasn’t supposed to be!” Bucky calls back then wiggles his eyebrows at Sam as he shuts the door.

Eager to find you, he drops his keys on the unpacked boxes by the door, stripping off his coat slowly as his ears listen intently to the sounds of the house.

The inside is simple, a dark gray concrete floor makes up the foyer that then shifts into stunning dark oak hardwood flooring. The windows are large with thin frames made of black steel. Immediately after the foyer to the right is the living room, two bright red sofas—one full and one loveseat—are pushed against the far wall, an unassembled coffee table half pulled from its box. A rolled up decorative rug lays on top of the larger sofa.

An open concept, the dining room follows the first floor with a decently sized dining table lighter than the floors with mid-century dining chairs in pale peach. Two of them are still wrapped in plastic.

On the other side of the dining table, is the black concrete kitchen island with maple cabinets. A black stainless-steel fridge and matching chef grade six burner stove are already hooked up an in use, a small pot of what smells like alfredo sauce burning and emitting the first puffs of black smoke.

Bucky drops his jacket and races for it, pulling the pot away from the flame then shutting it off.

“Shit…” He sighs, taking the pot to the sink then freezing when he sees cold noodles, all mushed and sticky and obviously overcooked thrown in what he can clearly see is a small fit of frustration from you.

He takes a deep breath, exhaling through his nose as he thinks about what he’ll possibly be able to say to make this day better for you. There has to be something that he can do.

As he waters down the sauce and begins to dump it, he makes up his mind.

He cleans the dishes first, then makes for the fridge to see what else you’ve bought to cook.

He finds the chicken that would have been for the pasta you were making and takes that out along with a few tomatoes, sharp cheddar, and beautiful red and yellow peppers.

Dinner is quick work, and though Bucky isn’t sure what he’s making will be very appetizing, he pours his heart and soul into this meal hoping that it’ll heal a bit of the darkness this day has obviously brought.

He sets the table and as he places the down two wine glasses, he suddenly hears a swell of music upstairs.

It’s beautiful, this melody, and it reminds him of a song that he knows he must have heard. There’s a full string orchestra, woodwinds, and a deep bass below. It all sounds beautiful, something he can’t quite put his finger on, but it’s melancholic and he can only imagine the state you’re in.

Deciding to get you down here before he pulls the wine from the fridge, he heads up the stairs.

The second floor has three bedrooms two on the left and the master on the right with a master bath and the second full bath sharing the same wall.

Although the inner walls of the house are made up of insulated and soundproofed drywall, the walls of each room on the outside are exposed sandstone brick, slightly darker than that of the exterior.

Bucky makes his way to the last door on the right, listening for a moment but the music is coming from the third-floor attic space.

Attic is used as a loose term. The space is actually completely open, nothing within it yet save for the large radio system that you brought from your place. The high-tech turntable is plugged into sturdy speakers that almost make it sound as if the orchestra is in the attic with you.

Bucky steps up onto the landing and spots you standing at the far end staring up at the large skylight as the sky grows darker with dusk’s quick approach. You have your arms wrapped around yourself as if you’re cold, the large sweater you’re wrapped in making you look soft and huggable.

You take his breath away, every time he sees you like this. You’ve always been beautiful but seeing you in clean clothing that isn’t torn or saturated in sea salt makes his heart skip a beat. He likes you looking cared for. You’ve gained a healthy amount of weight since you left the hospital and there is nothing sexier than how you look now.

The stretchy tights you wear underneath your sweater hug your curves tight, thick woolen socks on your feet.

If you hear him come in, you don’t show it. Your hands are clasped around the sleeves of your sweater, clinging tightly as you struggle with whatever you’re thinking.

Bucky needs to know what he can do, but he’s afraid to make it worse.

The only thing he can think of is to hold you, so that’s what he does.

He moves up behind you, waiting a moment before he places his hands on your shoulders then traces them down along the length of your arms. The way you have them crossed also brings his arms around your body.

As you melt against him, Bucky exhales the breath he’d been holding, kissing the side of your head as you shut your eyes and sigh.

“One of the things I hadn’t realized I’d missed being stranded on that island was music.” You tell him, voice conversational despite the grief you seem to still be processing.

“Me too.” Bucky admits, listening to the swell of music with new ears.

It gives him goosebumps.

“I guess things didn’t go well at A.I.M.?” Bucky probes gently, his lips pressed against your head as you continue to watch the sky through the skylight.

“I can’t exactly tell them that I was stranded on an island after my plane blew up.” You shrug. “Honestly, the guy was a pretty big jerk but, he’s right. They couldn’t exactly hold my position for me.”

Bucky sighs deeply, hating the disappointment in your voice. “You’ll find something, kitten. I’ll help you look.”

You shake your head. “I think maybe I should just take some time.”

“I think that’s a very good idea.” Bucky admits, his lips once again pressed to your head. He can’t seem to help himself. He wants to kiss you better, but he knows it’ll only do so much.

Both of you are aware just how much you’re struggling to get used to being back home.

You fall into silence, Bucky’s arms content to hold you.

Oh, shit. Dinner.

“I made you something to eat.” Bucky whispers, then drops his arms as you turn to look at him.

“Shit, the sauce!” You exclaim, fear making your eyes dilate.

“It’s okay, kitten. I took care of it.”

“I’m so sorry, Bucky. I’m so stupid.” You whimper.

“Hey, baby, it’s okay. Alright? Nothing to worry about.” He pulls your hand up to his lips and kisses your knuckles before lacing his fingers through yours to pull you from the room. “What do you think we should do with this space?”

He hopes you can’t see through his attempt to distract you.

“I don’t know.” You admit, looking back up at the space as he pull you down the stairs.

Bucky waits as you think, letting you lead the pace of conversation.

“We could just make it a multipurpose room.” You brainstorm. “You’ll need a gym? And I could use a space for reading.”

Bucky smiles, glad you’ve gotten your mind off your lost A.I.M. job, even if it is for a few moments.

“That sounds like a great idea. I’ll have to get you a nice lounge chair and some bookshelves.” Bucky nods eagerly.

As he pulls you through into the dining room, he lets your hand go to pull out your chair.

“This looks so good, babe.” You gasp, eyeing the cheesy chicken on your plate, laden with tomatoes and peppers. “Thank you so much.”

Bucky watches you sit down, your voice breaking as you thank him and then you’re shoving your hands over your face as you sob.

He doesn’t need you to say anything and there’s nothing he can say to make it better. All he can do is drop to his knees and pull you into his arms, holding you tight as you let the stresses of the day spill out.

You bury your face against his neck, clinging to his shirt tight, somehow making Bucky feel more needed here than you ever did on the island.

“I’ve got you, kitten.” He whispers, squeezing you tight. “I’ve got you.”

~~~~~~~~~~

“What are you going to do today?” Bucky whispers, eyes still shut.

He gives you a fright, making you jump with his sudden question and you turn to hide your face in your pillow as you laugh lightly.

“Holy fuck, Bucky!” You shout into your pillow and feel him shift beside you, his hand moving across your lower back. His hand over the sheets you’re using to cover yourself.

You turn to look at him, biting your bottom lip with playful anger.

“I’m sorry.” He laughs silently, puffs of air as he blinks slowly, like cat. Telling you he loves you without saying anything. “Serves you right for watching me sleep.”

“You’re so pretty though.” You tell him, reaching out to trace his nose from bridge to tip.

“Me?!” He asks, astonished by the news before he throws himself over you, grabbing your wrist as he goes to pin it up above your head.

Settling his weight on you, he breathes in and out heavily, enjoying the feel of you beneath him. With your wrist in his metal grip and his flesh hand squeezing your hip, you chuckle happily, licking your lips.

“What about you?”

“What about me?”

“If I’m beautiful, what does that make you?”

“Normal?” You wonder, knowing he’ll refute any disparities you make in your self-assessment. He’s biased. He loves you.

“Perfection.” He whispers, and you shake your head because you knew it had been coming.

“Nobody’s perfect, Bucky.”

“You’re perfect for me.” He clarifies, and leans down to kiss your lips slowly, just a peck.

He holds it, staring into your eyes.

“Perfect with me.” He continues.

You smile, perfectly at peace.

“You never answered my question.” Bucky tells you, throwing himself onto his left side, keeping his right arm around your waist.

“What question?” You wonder, reaching over to stroke his hair.

“What are you gonna do today?”

“Oh.” You sigh. “You’re going in today, finally?”

“Just for the day. Getting acquainted with the new headquarters. No missions yet. But soon.” Bucky nods.

“I’m gonna have to get used to being here without you.” You turn onto your side and scoot in close, pressing your nose right up to the tip of his, shutting your eyes in subdued lamentation.

“I’m gonna have to learn to leave you behind too.” Bucky points out. “I’ve gotten used to having you nearby, kitty cat.”

You laugh. Reaching up to stroke his cheek. “You haven’t called me that in a while.”

“Remember when you woke up on the beach? Right after the plane crashed?” Bucky’s brow puckers, a little crease between his steel and ice eyes.

“I remember you yelling at me to move.”

“I didn’t yell.”

“You might as well have.”

“I didn’t know you were so sensitive.”

“Yes you do.”

“Fuck. You’re right, I do.” He chuckles.

“Stop hurting my feelings, Barnes.” You pout.

He laughs, pulling you close again to kiss you.

“Mmm.” He mumbles, “Baby?”

“Yeah?” You pull back, catching your breath and pulling back to look at him.

“Why is it so damn hot in here?”

“I was cold.” You force a smile, too tight, too toothy. A downright look of guilt if ever Bucky saw one. “Too hot?”

“Not yet.” Bucky mutters, crawling over you again, his hands trailing down; one pushes your white long-sleeved shirt up to expose your tummy while his other hand slides down past the waistband of your sleep shorts. “But we can fix that.”

~~~~~~~~~~

Bucky’s exhausted. He didn’t know how much energy it would take to get back into the swing of things.

As he trudges along down the sidewalk, he passes a few people and they kindly look up and smile at him, waving when they recognize him.

His interview after his rescue seems to have changed the mind of most people in the city. He’s no longer the Winter Soldier, but Sergeant Barnes.

“Hi Sergeant Barnes. Nice night?” A lilting voice asks.

He looks up in search of its owner and finds a young brunette walking by him. Dressed in a tight silver cocktail dress with sparkling sequins along the bottom hem of the skirt and a black coat much thinner than she should need in tonight’s cold.

The flirtatious tilt of her head and the sparkle in her eyes leaves him in no doubt of her aim.

“It’ll be much better once I get back home to my girl.” Bucky tells her, turning to walk backwards a few steps as he waves her goodbye.

“Lucky lady.” She tells him, pulling her bag up higher on her shoulder.

“I’m the lucky one. Have a good night, Miss.” Bucky gives her a nod and turns to be on his way.

He’s not sure if it’s wrong that he feels it necessary to mention you whenever a woman pays him this kind of attention. There are plenty who have wished him a good night without the flirting that he carries on conversations with and manages not to bring you up.

It’s almost like he uses you as a shield.

As he reaches the steps of the house, he climbs them quickly and then waits by the door with his hand pressed over his heart.

That girl really made him anxious. He doesn’t like being seen like that. It’s invasive.

When his heart is steadier, he pulls out his keys and lets himself in.

There’s a rush of hot air that chokes him. He coughs, pulling at his collar as he reluctantly shuts the door and its influx of arid air.

He sheds as much of his outer clothes as he can. Blue jacket and the gray sweater beneath it leaving him in a plain red t-shirt.

“What the hell?” He gasps, dropping his outerwear on the floor before locking the door and venturing up the stairs.

The entire first floor is empty. Dark. The smell of whatever you had for lunch still filling the house. Grilled cheese?

“Y/N?” He calls, moving for the bedroom but he finds it empty. “Baby?”

There’s a sudden rush of wind, a flash of lightning from the third-floor stairs, followed by a loud clap of thunder.

It pulls his gaze up and he follows his instinct taking the stairs two at a time.

Since moving in, after spending each day taking care of one room of the house at a time, the attic is no longer empty.

As he reaches the landing, to his left is a small home gym. Each piece picked out by him, a punching bag, mats, weights, treadmill for you if you ever decide to use it. Bucky prefers to run outside.

On the right side of the room, your reading corner. Six shelves at least seven feet tall with a step ladder to reach the higher shelves. There’s a tea table, two comfortable padded chairs, and another deep enough that you could curl into it and sit all day reading without needing to get up.

There’s a reading lamp and a colorful carpet to make the space cozier and on across a small coffee table a lounging sofa for Bucky to lay on when you’re reading and he just wants to be by you.

On the far side of the room, directly under the skylight, he spots you on a platform bed you’d had set up for what Bucky had thought was sky-watching. He can see that he was right.

Your eyes are trained on the sky above, thunder clouds flashing and echoing around the house.

Around the bed you’ve set up what looks like a semi-circle of potted trees. A mixture of four-foot palms and Cycas, all surrounding the head of the bed.

Without a word Bucky makes his way towards you, stripping down to his briefs as he goes. When he reaches the bed, he finds you also in your underwear, sheets tossed aside as you lay with your head against the pillows and your eyes trained on the window.

He crawls in, stopping over you for just a moment to smile down at you and lean down to kiss your lips.

Your hands come up to caress his ears, then up to the back of his head.

“You cut your hair.” You observe, a glint in your eye that tells him you like what you see.

He lays beside you, looking up to see what you see, and he finds a strange sense of calm fall over him.

Placing his hands on his chest, he relaxes and then reaches down to take one of yours.

“So, this is what you’ve been up to with the trees?”

“Something didn’t feel right.” You admit. “I think I found the answer.”

The heat, the sound of thunder, the lightning overhead, and now with the jade leaves of these trees filling his line of sight, bucky can almost see himself back on the island. Back when it was just them and no one in the world could hurt either of you. Where life was much simpler. Wilder. And just a bit quieter.

Even though things have gotten better, this feels like the world of two where your love was born and nurtured.

“This is amazing.” Bucky admires, giving your hand a squeeze. “I think we should get married.”

You turn to look at him, eyes wide.

“Too soon?” He checks, turning to look at you too. “Marry me, kitten.”

Bucky watches you turn onto your side. He mirrors you, wrapping his arm around you.

“Whadya say?” He waits, heart pounding despite his calm exterior.

He feels your hand trail down his side, tracing the side of his thigh before you bring it around to his butt then without warning give his left cheek a nice squeeze.

“Not the left side!” He yelps.

“I will!” You agree, giddy and the happiest Bucky has ever seen you.

Somewhere past the burn of the spot where Sam had pierced him with that implant gun, past the pain and the throbbing, Bucky realizes you’ve just agreed to be his wife.

[marjansmarwani]

sleep is never coming

2.8k || ao3

Owen has been having the same dream for months now. Every few nights he falls asleep and is returned to one of the worst moments of his life in vivid technicolor. After one of these nights, he finds himself in the kitchen: seeking some tea in pursuit of sleep when he is suddenly not alone. But maybe the young officer who just stumbled into his kitchen from his son's bedroom is the best person he could talk to about this. Maybe it takes someone who loves his son as much as he does to truly understand the fear that is keeping him up at night. ----- Angst Week Day 1: "How do we fix this?" + Anon request: "It's just a nightmare."

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The bang is sudden, unexpected, and earth-shattering. Owen whips around, searching for the source of the sound but stops mid-turn, frozen in horror at the sight before him. His son slumping over; clutching his collarbone, gasping in pain, and slowly falling to the ground. He tries to move towards him but he feels as if he is trying to move through molasses, too slow to reach him in time. Too slow to help him; just like he was too slow to prevent it. 

It’s the same, every time. He can trace the movements, he knows the script by heart. First, TK falls; then comes the blood. Far, far too much of it oozing from the entry wound, spreading across the ground beneath him and sliding down the wall behind them. There’s more blood too, in a place it should never be: coming out of TK’s mouth as he struggles to breathe, as his wide and terrified eyes seek Owen’s. 

He wants to reassure him, he wants to tell him it’ll be okay, but he doesn’t want to lie. He made a promise many years ago to never lie to his child, no matter what. And as much as he wants it to be a truth, it may not be. He doesn’t know that everything will be okay and that terrifies him. 

There is movement and commotion and voices shouting instructions and updates but all Owen knows for sure is the sensation of watching TK’s eyes close, or seeing the moment he stops breathing. He knows for certain the exact moment he watches his son die because it is the moment his heart shatters. 

There is deadly silence then, for a beat. And in the breath after, he wakes up. 

He shots upright in bed, sucking in a harsh breath before running a weary and shaking hand across his face. “It’s just a nightmare,” he reminded himself, “it’s not real.” He knew this: he’d been having that dream for months now. 

While true, the reminder did nothing to quell the racing of his heart. He sighed and threw the blankets back, climbing out of bed and heading towards the bedroom door. There was no use trying to go back to sleep; past experience had shown him that much. His only hope was to head to the kitchen, make some tea, and hope for the best. Just like he had every few nights in the month since the accident. 

He suppressed a yawn as he walked into the kitchen before checking that the kettle still had water in it and turning on the burner. He leaned against the counter as it heated, rubbing at his tired eyes. He couldn’t keep going on like this. He needed to sleep through the night, he needed to make sure he was on the top of his game. He owed it to his team. 

But every time he tried, he got a front-row seat to one of the worst moments of his life. Nothing — no fire, no accident, not even 9/11 — would compare to the fear he had felt watching his son collapse after being shot. He knew worrying about him was normal, he knew dwelling on it was to be expected. He just hadn’t banked on reliving it every other night. 

He was so distracted by his thoughts that he didn’t notice the sound of footsteps coming down the hall until a sound of surprise had him looking up to see a tousled, shirtless, and embarrassed Officer Reyes standing at the threshold of his kitchen. 

“I’m sorry Sir, I didn’t know…” 

Owen waved off his stammered apology, “You didn’t do anything wrong, Carlos. And please, it’s 3 am and you’re in my kitchen—I think you can call me Owen.” 

Carlos gave a nervous laugh but walked further into the kitchen. He raised an eyebrow as he looked at Owen, “It is 3 am so if you don’t mind me asking Sir...Owen, what are you doing?” 

Owen gestured at the kettle that was just starting to steam, “Couldn’t sleep, so I decided to see if some tea would help. Would you like some? I could use the company.” 

“Oh,” Carlos looked taken aback, “um, sure. Thank you.” 

Owen turned to the cupboard to pull out two mugs and the box of chamomile tea. He held it up to Carlos, who nodded. “So,” he began, setting everything down on the counter next to the stove, “any particular reason you are in my kitchen at 3 am?” 

Carlos chuckled and stepped closer, settling onto one of the stools on the other side of the counter, “I just woke up and wanted a glass of water. I figured you wouldn’t mind and I had no idea I’d run into anyone.” 

“Normally you’d be right, but I’ve been having some trouble sleeping lately.” 

Carlos was quiet then and Owen could see the dilemma playing out in his head through his expression. It was in Carlos Reyes’s nature to fix things, and he was trying to decide whether or not prying into his boyfriend’s father’s insomnia over 3 am tea was crossing a line. Owen decided to make the decision for him. 

“I’ve been having some dreams that are keeping me up. Well, a dream I guess. The same one, every time.”

Carlos studied him as Owen paused to pull the whistling kettle off the burner, “Do you want to talk about it?” 

Owen shook his head, “Thanks, but one of us losing sleep over it is enough. No reason to keep you up too.” 

“I’m already up and after the shock of finding you in the kitchen I am wide awake,” Carlos pointed out dryly. “We’re both here so you may as well talk about it, if you want to.” 

Owen considered as he poured the water over the teabags in the mugs. Did he want to? Keeping it to himself clearly wasn’t working. He didn’t want to burden anyone else with this; a part of him wondered how anyone else could possibly understand. The fear and pain of watching your child almost die was unlike anything else. Still, he conceded, in this particular situation, who was better suited to understand this fear than Carlos? He knew how hard the accident had been hard on him too, despite trying as hard as he had to keep up a brave front. If anyone could understand where he was coming from, it would be the young man sitting at the counter with him. 

“I keep reliving that night.” 

He stole a glance at Carlos to see if he needed to be more specific but the newly clenched jaw told Owen that he knew exactly what night he was talking about. He slid the other mug across the counter before wrapping his hands around his own, “sometimes it feels like it’s every time I try to sleep. I close my eyes and I’m just there again.” 

Carlos let out a shuddering breath and tightened his grip on his mug, “I know what you mean. I...had a similar problem, right after it happened. I don’t think I got much sleep at all while he was in the hospital. I would wake up afraid, not remembering that he was okay, that it had all turned out fine. I just had this fear that I couldn’t shake. Sometimes I don’t think I ever will, not completely. The only thing that helped with the dreams, at least, was the fact that TK was lying next to me, alive and okay, eventually.” 

“Well I’m sure neither of you would appreciate me coming to check on him every time I have that dream, would make for some awkward encounters,” Owen retorted, trying for a joke that fell flat, judging by Carlos’s forced smile. He sighed and ran a weary hand over his face, “How do we fix this?” 

“Time, I guess,” Carlos responded with a shrug. “I wish I had a better answer, but I think that’s the only one there is.” 

Owen took a sip of his tea, rolling the idea around in his mind before he shook his head, “I don’t know if time is going to be enough. I don’t think time will ever completely erase the guilt.” 

“The guilt?” There was genuine surprise in the young officer’s voice and Owen snorted. 

“I’m not only his father, but his captain. I told him to breach the door. I gave the order, and I was standing right there. I had all the information but I didn’t put it together fast enough to stop it, to save him. There is not a single way of looking at this that doesn’t make me responsible.” 

Owen isn’t sure what reaction he expected out of his son’s boyfriend, but it certainly wasn’t what he got. He didn’t expect him to scoff and counter his claim with one of his own: “How do you think I feel? I’m a cop and I was on the scene. We knew there was a gun and yet it slipped through the cracks. It’s more my fault than anyone’s if anything.” 

Owen blinked for a second, processing everything that Carlos had just said. “That’s insane,” he retorted incredulously, “you had two civilians in your care and the logical assumption to make was that once the grandfather collapsed the gun was no longer an issue. “Besides,” he added wryly, “whoever heard of anyone shooting at the fire dept? Everyone loves us.” 

Carlos snorted at that before his expression turned serious again, “The same goes for you: how did you have any way of knowing that things were any different than any other time? You followed protocol, you did everything you should have. TK did everything he should have; he did the job he was trained to do. Chances are, nothing could have prevented what happened.” 

Owen considered his words as he swished the tea in his cup, watching as the leaves that had settled at the bottom rose upwards into the warm liquid again. “You might be right,” he allowed, “but I don’t like it.” 

“No one likes feeling helpless, Owen,” Carlos pointed out wryly. “But sometimes that’s all we can be.”

Owen looked up from his tea to study the younger man, who met his gaze and held it. “You’re pretty wise for someone so young, you know that?” he said after a few moments. 

“That’s just your sleep-deprived brain talking.” 

Owen chuckled at that and Carlos grinned in response. “What do you think TK would say if he knew we were both up at an ungodly hour worrying about him?”

“He would be very against it,” Owen said with certainty, and Carlos hummed in agreement. 

“Unfortunately for him, I don’t think either of us is going to stop anytime soon.” 

“No,” Owen agreed, “but that’s what happens when you love someone.” 

Carlos froze, choking on his tea mid-sip before setting the cup down as he coughed and stared at Owen, who chuckled. 

“It’s okay Carlos, I don’t know if you’ve said it yet, but it doesn’t matter. I know you love him and if I know my son, he feels the same way. I’m just happy you two found each other. It makes me feel a lot better knowing that he has someone else who cares about him as much as I do looking out for him.”

“But not enough to help you sleep at night, huh?” 

“Apparently not,” Owen agreed wearily. 

Carlos gave him a smile, “What about the fact that he has both of us looking after him now? Does that make you feel any better?” Carlos paused a moment and met Owen’s eyes before continuing, “Because you’re not alone in this Owen, and neither is he. You have a family here in Austin. I may have only been around for a few months but it doesn’t take long to see. You, TK, the rest of the crew: you all look out for each other. Does that help at all?” 

Owen looked down at the counter, overwhelmed by the truth of the statement. It wasn’t that he didn’t know that, it was more that sometimes it was hard to remember. It didn’t seem like so long ago that he had arrived in Austin, that they had all met. Yet he knew what Carlos said was true. He did have a family here in Austin now, and it was growing to include a certain officer more and more each day. 

“As long as we’re clear that you’re included in that too, Carlos,” he said, after a beat. 

The younger man opened his mouth but Owen held up a hand, “Nope, no arguments. You’re just as much a part of this as anyone else. It was already true, but this whole tea thing has really sealed the deal, no backing out now.” 

There was another beat of silence, and then Carlos smiled. “Thank you, Owen,” he said softly. 

They trailed off into comfortable silence after that, each lost in their own thoughts and sipping their tea. It was some time before Owen happened to catch a glimpse of the clock over the stove. He swore, breaking the reverie they had been in and causing Carlos to startle ever so slightly. 

“Sorry,” he apologized, “I just hadn’t realized how late it had gotten. Or early, maybe?” He trailed off and ran a hand through his hair before turning and looking at Carlos whose eyebrows rose when he saw the time. 

“Do we even bother trying to go back to bed at this point?” he asked, and Owen chuckled. 

“How do you feel about breakfast?” he asked instead. 

“I think that sounds like an excellent plan,” Carlos agreed, pulling himself off of his stool and crossing into the kitchen, “anything particular you had in mind?” 

It was shortly after that that a groggy TK stumbled into the kitchen, taking in the scene before him between blinks as he fought to clear the last remnants of sleep from his eyes. “What are you two doing?” he asked, voice still slightly raspy with sleep but filled with confusion. “Am I dreaming?” 

Carlos grinned and stepped around the counter, pressing a light kiss on TK’s cheek as Owen spoke, “Can’t say that you are, no. I can say though that I am surprised to see you up — it’s pretty early.” 

“Which is why I was confused when I woke up to an empty bed,” he retorted pointedly, glancing at Carlos. “So I figured I should see where you’d gotten to.” 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you,” Carlos told him sincerely, “I just woke up and came out for a drink and ran into your dad in the kitchen. We got to talking and realized neither of us could go back to sleep, so we made breakfast.” 

He turned as he spoke, gesturing to the counter which held a platter of eggs and pancakes. “I was just going to come and wake you up in a bit, to see if you wanted any.” 

TK glanced from the counter to Owen and back to Carlos, eyebrows raised, “Are you sure I’m not dreaming?” he asked eventually. 

“Pretty sure,” Owen said with a shrug, and TK nodded. 

“That makes sense,” he agreed, “I don’t think I could even dream up something this strange.” 

“I don’t know son,” Owen said lightly as he poured himself a cup of coffee from the freshly brewed pot, “the mind can be a pretty interesting place. But the food is getting cold, come on.” 

TK glanced at Carlos again who smiled at him and pulled him forward to one of the stools. He slid onto it and accepted the plate passed to him by his father with his baffled expression still in place, though it seemed to be morphing to something closer to fondness with each passing second. 

“So,” he said softly, leaning closer to Carlos as Owen busied himself at the stove, flipping the last batch of pancakes, “you and my dad get along now, do you?” 

“We do,” Carlos confirmed confidently, shooting Owen a grin. 

TK looked between them, “I don’t know if I should be happy or worried about this.” 

“Probably a bit of both,” Owen told him lightly as he slid the last pancakes onto the tray and set it down before them.” 

“That sounds right,” TK agreed. “What did you guys talk about?” 

There was quiet for a second as Carlos and Owen glanced at each other. “Just stuff,” Owen said lightly, “general things, everyday stuff; you know.” 

TK didn’t look convinced but he didn’t press, reaching instead for the plate of pancakes and serving them onto the plates before them. “That’s fine,” he said lightly, “keep your secrets. Since you’re friends now, I guess.” 

Carlo shook his head fondly as he accepted the pancakes placed on his plate and Owen smiled. Maybe it was just morning optimism, but things looked better in the dim dawn light leaking through the kitchen windows. Maybe this talk, this reminder that his family was so much more than just him and TK now, would be the thing that would help him to put this behind him. 

Maybe tonight he would have a dreamless sleep — maybe this had been just what he needed.

[murdereraisuha]

Classpecting TWST: Savanaclaw

Time to classpect the dorm that deserved better writing-wise. I’m gonna start tagging these “twst analysis” now too cause I am basically using the classpect stuff as a vehicle for getting a better understanding of the characters

Spoilers for chapter 2 and some of the trio’s personal stories. No knowledge of Homestuck required to read.

[Image description: A banner containing a picture of Leona, the symbol for the hope aspect, and the words “Leona Kingscholar: Prince of Hope”]

Before we get to the reasoning, I just want to say, Leona I am so sorry you have to share a classpect with Eridan. Okay now I’ll hand the mic to past me.

Throughout his personal stories, we see that Leona is fine with resorting to underhanded tactics, but he specifically values cleverness and creative use of resources. Leona looks down on those who don’t exhibit those things (ex. the Savanaclaw students in Leona’s dorm uniform story who tried to beat up Jack using sheer numbers).

Leona tends to only expend effort on things that benefit him in some way.

Leona is a powerful and intelligent magic user; he could have easily graduated already if he wanted to, but it seems he doesn’t want to.

Despite Leona’s strengths, those around him criticized him and constantly compared him to his brother due to Leona being the 2nd born prince. No matter what he did, he could not sway those opinions. He could never become number 1.

Because of this, he developed the belief that life isn’t fair and he gives up on things rather easily.

Based on this, I have 3 aspects in mind: rage, hope, and doom.

Rage and hope go hand in hand as opposites: rage is negative emotions, rejection, and doubt, while hope is positive emotions, acceptance, and ideals. For Leona, his story seems to be about him having given up on his hope and dreams of ever succeeding. In its place he has become quick to deem efforts worthless. He acts antagonistic to people like Vil and Malleus, and he seems to disapprove of some of Jack’s honorable ideals. All of these things connect to the parts of rage/hope.

Doom is also a possibility, as it represents negativity, decay, and limits. It is the opposite to life, the aspect that I picked for Kalim. Therefore, I think doom is plausible since Leona shows the opposite side to the luxuries enjoyed by Kalim and Farena as first borns.

Now for classes. I don’t think Leona does much stealing, he doesn’t suffer from indecision, he doesn’t put up any masks, and he’s not a very healing focused person. I think that narrows it down to witch, heir, mage, prince, and bard.

If it’s prince or bard it would have to be hope, in which case prince of hope fits Leona best due to his destruction of hope being focused more than just happening naturally. Though Leona has suffered, it seems to have more hampered his potential than gave him useful knowledge so now I’m kicking out mage. Heir seems to fit best if it’s as a heir of rage. Finally, I’m also kicking out witch since he he doesn’t do much manipulation of any of the 3 aspects.

Between prince of hope and heir of rage... it’s prince of hope. Since Leona says that nothing he did could sway people’s negative opinion of him, we can assume that Leona had hope earlier in his life that he could change those opinions. He did stuff like studying and improving his magic until he finally realized that that wasn’t changing his image at all. Rather than preserve his hope, he choose to destroy it, making his class the active destroyer class, prince.

In chapter 2, he rallies Ruggie the rest of his dorm against Diasomnia, using their hopes as a tool for destroying the other teams. In 2-24 Leona then tries to destroy their hopes once he deems their plan useless. At one point he says 「じゃあ本当のことを教えてやるよ」, translated by Shel_BB on youtube as “Let me give you a dose of reality.” This and the other things he says this episode really connect to the hope/rage themes of reality vs fantasy and stop vs go. Therefore, quite ironically since he is an actual prince, Leona's classpect seems to be a prince of hope.

[Image description: A banner containing a picture of Ruggie, the symbol for the Life aspect, and the words “Ruggie Bucchi: Rogue of Life”]

Ruggie grew up in a poor environment with food insecurity. Many of his clothes are hand-me-downs, he’s fine with eating odd things like dandelions, and before holiday break he raids the cafeteria for food to bring back for the others in his town.

Ruggie’s official hobby is part-time jobs. From working at Mostro Lounge to selling mandrakes, he’s really focused on earning money however he can.

His skillset, which includes pickpocketing and haggling, lets Ruggie pull off plenty of clever and underhanded tricks.

However, like Leona, Ruggie still has standards: in one of his ceremony robe voice lines, he says that he prefers his lot in life over that of a spoiled, rich person without any problems. 

His dorm uniform personal story, where he teams up with Trein’s cat to get magic history help and catch rats, is about using the power of others instead of relying solely on himself.

There were 3 paragraphs of stuff here that I deleted because I was getting absolutely nowhere. I didn’t expect Ruggie to be this hard.

Like, Ruggie's problems kinda seem to stem from just poverty and Leona being an asshole. Well, hm, actually if we combine the moral of his dorm uniform story and Ruggie acting like Leona’s maid, perhaps Ruggie’s problem is something like he keeps taking on burdens? Out of everyone who lives in his slums, he’s likely the only one going to a prestigious school like NRC. He’s likely well-known there because of that and him bringing back food a lot. Are Ruggie’s ambitions for a good job not only his own ambitions, but that of the whole community? I’ve always been a bit confused about why Ruggie helps Leona out outside of the magift tournament stuff. Is he... so used to having to help others and constantly take on jobs that his standards for what’s reasonable work are gone? I just went through the chats and in Jack’s one with Ruggie, Jack is telling him about having to find something to draw for a homework assignment and Ruggie immediately offers to go get his warthog piggy bank. Bruh?? Doesn’t that have your money? Why are you just lending it out like that????

Alright, because Ruggie is a guy who needs to chill and have some me-time, I’m narrowing his class down to rogue, maid, or knight. For aspects, I’m thinking life (energy & luxury), time (action & death), or blood (community & responsibility).

On second thought, I’m kicking out maid and blood. Rogue & knight and life & time seem to fit Ruggie better. And now my best guess is rogue of life. First, he obviously fits the stealing aspect of the class through his skill at stealing. Like how a rogue redistributes things, Ruggie obtains money/food to redistribute to the others in the slums. He also injured the people in chapter 2, basically taking life from them, which resulted in Savanaclaw's chances of winning the tournament getting stronger. For the tendency of rogues to have a hard time coping with having their aspect, Ruggie has a hard time accepting luxury/relaxation time. He funnels all his resources into efficient causes and his community. Also, in Jack’s dorm outfit personal story where Jack tries to help him out with stuff, Ruggie is distrustful of him and goes out of his way to avoid him.

I didn’t have any sort of eureka moment with this one like I had with the twins, so I’m still unsure about it. However, considering that TWST characters obviously weren’t meant to get crammed into the classpect system, it makes sense that some might not fit perfectly. So, with what I do have, I think that Ruggie is a rogue of life.

[Image description: A banner containing a picture of Jack Howl, the symbol for the mind aspect, and the words “Jack Howl: Page of Mind”]

Jack values honor, strength, and hard work. He believes that people should accomplish things through their own efforts rather than lowly tricks.

Therefore, Jack disapproves of Leona and Ruggie's method of doing things. 

In contrast to how Leona and Ruggie use others, Jack sometimes refuses help, like in chapter 2 when he claims he can handle his dorm by himself.

Jack is quite intelligent and insightful, as shown by his comments throughout chapter 3 and his scary outfit personal story.

Jack respects social/group hierarchies and takes care not to disturb order, as shown in his dorm outfit personal story.

Also in his dorm outfit personal story, Jack says that he wants to become someone with a single true purpose.

So, I'm already kind of stumped. He doesn't have any big moments in the spotlight during the main story, so there's not much to go off of there. 

We have to start somewhere though. So, first off, I’ll eliminate the destruction classes and theft since he doesn’t do much of either. I’ll also eliminate the knowledge classes since I don’t think he holds any special knowledge of anything.

For potential aspects, after eliminating the ones that seem mostly irrelevant to him, I’m left with mind, heart, hope, rage, or blood. The 2 that particularly stick out to me are mind and heart.

Mind is the aspect of logic, unbiasedness, morality, and blending in. For Jack, his strong focus on justice even when it means going against someone he once admired seems very mind-like. His care in not stepping out of line in social situations also relates to blending in. Of course, we should still keep mind’s opposite, heart, in consideration.

Now that I’m pretty confident his aspect is mind or heart, we’re left with 12 possible classpects. I still can’t narrow it down well, let’s go back to Jack’s traits.

What challenges does he face or have to overcome? In the main story, the problem he faces is trying to correct the injustice in his dorm by himself. In his dorm outfit story, the problem he faces is being over zealous about helping Ruggie. Wait, actually, that’s not right. Though that is a problem, it seems like the main growth/realization for Jack is about his motivation for helping Ruggie. When questioned by Ruggie in part 1, he mainly cites the group hierarchy as the reasons for his actions. However, later on, Deuce deduces (haha) that Jack looks up to Ruggie like a big brother. Though Jack denies it, at the end of the story he asks if Ruggie would let him call him big bro.

It’s like he is concerned about justice and social harmony (mind stuff), but in reality he does stuff according to his impulses and emotions (heart stuff). This doesn’t feel like a prince/bard situation though, it isn’t dysfunctional or destructive enough for that. I thought that the pages of the cast might be Epel and/or Sebek, but it seems that Jack may be a page.

Pages, the passive exploitation class, are characterized by a deficit in their aspect that they try to hide and overcome. Like how Jack takes his service of Ruggie too far, pages often overshoot in their efforts to correct their weakness. However, as they grow and learn from their mistakes, pages become masters of their aspect, like in Jack’s scary outfit story where he starts out with a bad idea then at the end develops it into a sound plan to scare the tourists. That also fits well with mind, since smoke and mirrors is another big part of that aspect.

Therefore, with how well this class seems to fit with Jack’s actions and motivations, I think that he is probably a page of mind.

[kristoffs-lullaby]

A Guide on How to Not Confess to Your Best Friend

(Hi!! This is late I’m so sorry ;; but here’s my part for the exchange! @ninjago-valentine-exchange) [ Plasma B | 2.9k words]  Kai was awful with feelings.  He might have played himself off as cool (or at least tried to) but when it really came down to it.. he was a mess. He could dish out flirty comments all he wanted but that didn’t mean that he knew what to do with them if the other party ever decided to retaliate. And that’s not something he figured about himself until Skylor. Maybe that’s why he’d liked Skylor so much. No he didn’t entirely enjoy the moments where his brain staggered and he looked like an absolute fool, but it made him want to try to keep up. If there was one thing he hated, it was being stunned into silence because that just meant he was losing. And Kai didn’t lose. 

While things didn’t really work out with Skylor relationship-wise, he still learned something about himself. And maybe their whole dynamic and the loss of it was what led to the chain of events that he still couldn’t quite believe even as he was living through it. 

Kai didn’t think much of it at first. That’s just how he and the other three Were. They teased each other. Poked fun at one another. Cracked jokes. And sometimes it would be at one another’s expense. Sometimes they’d take it too far and one of them would get pissed and the other wouldn’t understand Why until they had a much needed conversation about limits and boundaries. 

But that never came up when this particular brand of teasing and banter kicked off and maybe it should’ve been obvious way back then that he didn’t mind Jay crossing  this one specific boundary. But Kai was stupid and Kai was oblivious. 

It started as an off-handed comment about how maybe Jay had chosen the wrong sibling to date when Nya refused to side with him in a very heated debate about cake. Like the traitor she was, she took Cole’s side on the whole thing. Kai was at least glad to see that there was no bad blood between the three of them when Jay struck an, admittedly, low blow by bringing up how Nya was backstabbing him for Cole again just like in their former relationship.

That didn’t mean he didn’t want to witness SOME sort of drama. So he sided with Jay. Which led to an uproar. Which led to Jay saying what he did. 

And it was a joke. Kai knew it was a joke. Nya and Cole knew it was a joke. And Jay had obviously meant it as a joke. There was that buffer though and he couldn’t understand why. 

He reasoned with himself that he was having trouble keeping up with all three yelling at each other. All the while he was stuck in the middle and that was why he didn’t say anything immediately and instead took a swig of his soda. But even those few seconds he bought himself apparently weren’t enough because he didn’t even have the time to register the words he planned to say before his mouth had made the decision for him. 

He was playing along apparently. 

“Obviously. I’m much better looking than Nya anyway. Don’t know what you ever saw in her.” Kai hung his head and shook it in disbelief. 

“HEY!” 

It’d been months now and that one moment had spurred on their little unspoken challenge. A competition of sorts. 

Really what they were doing was full on flirting with each other but they’d play it off as if it were a game between them to see who could fluster the other first. Until it wasn’t a game anymore. But neither of them was willing to admit that it wasn’t. And it grew to be a frustrating occurrence because everyone else knew what was up except those two idiots apparently. 

Kai was currently winning though and that’s all that mattered. Yup. All that mattered.

“Hey Romeo!”

Kai’s head snapped up at the nickname. (There was something to be said about the fact that they’d gotten used to using them but he wasn’t about to be the one to bring it up). He watched as Jay jogged up to him before the blue ninja leaned over to catch his breath as soon as he was at a closer distance. Kai wanted to laugh at the fact that the guy was a whole Ninja and still ran out of stamina a lot quicker than Dareth. It was kind of sad, actually, but he couldn’t help the fond eye roll it got out of him. 

“Hey Sunshine.” Kai supplied as he draped an arm over Jay’s shoulders lazily when the other boy finally stood his full height. “I’m guessin’ you have some big news. That or you’re dying to see me and I just took your breath away.” 

Jay snorted and shoved at his chest before ducking under Kai’s arm and side-stepping away from the touch. 

“No. And if you’re about to detail whatever daydreams you have about me it’s gonna have to wait-” 

“Shit. Is there danger?” Kai’s face dropped instantly as a million and one bad scenarios ran through his head. Geez being a ninja was hard.

“No, no, no.” It was sort of cute the way the blue ninja waved his hands around frantically. He was so animated when he spoke and it wasn’t something that was lost on Kai. If anything it was something he found endearing. He couldn’t tear his eyes away. How could he? Jay made it incredibly hard to ignore him. That’s probably why most people he came across labeled him as ‘annoying’. And maybe Kai had used the word against him in the.. not so distant past. But it wasn’t exactly right. Jay just had that sort of presence that demanded attention and sometimes it was a bit overwhelming but.. it wasn’t exactly a bad thing either.

Jay tapped a finger against his chin and looked him up and down. ”Your fashion sense might be a danger to society.. but other than that?”

“You take that back. You’re just jealous I rock everything I wear.” Kai crossed his arms over his chest and squinted. The absolute nerve. This brat was asking for a beatdown during training later. 

“Not jealous. Buuut. I do appreciate the view you’re right.”

“Why you-”

“Here.” Jay interrupted and shoved something in his direction. 

It was wrapped haphazardly. It reminded Kai of something he’d whip together when he was like nine. Back when he hardly knew how to use scissors and the tape dispenser was one of the greatest enemies in his life. Ah the good old days. The longer he looked at it the more ridiculous it looked. It didn’t even look like it had been wrapped with the same wrapping paper all the way through. More like Jay had scraps of various different ones and decided to stick ‘em together. Which.. Actually suited him. This very much screamed JAY. But why was he giving this to him..?

“C’mon dude I know your favorite person in the world just gave you a kickass gift but  you don’t gotta stare at it like it’s the best thing you’ve ever seen in your life when I’m standing right here.” Jay sounded nervous. It was subtle and he played it off well (too well. Since when was Jay good at hiding it?) but Kai could tell in the way his voice rose just a decibel above its usual tone. It was also in the tic. Jay had a habit of looping one of the drawstrings of his hoodie around his finger when he was anxious. 

“My bad. Hold on let me get a good look at you,” This was totally payback for earlier. “Yeah. How could I even question it. Nothing compares.” he determined with a wink to send it home. 

Jay scoffed and was bordering on the edge of giving up this round too if the light pink dusting his cheeks was anything to go by, but in the end it looked like he was going to stand his ground this time. That was fine. This little exchange wasn’t over and Kai had plenty of time to sweep up a tally for the score from right under him. 

Or so he thought. 

Nothing could have prepared him for what happened next. 

Which sounded a lot more dramatic than it really was but what the hell was he supposed to do with this? 

Kai had spent that night restless. A restless night wasn’t foreign to him in any way. From time to time the red ninja had trouble sleeping. If he spoke out about how occasionally he’d lie in bed and just mull over every little detail from the past week, one of the other ninja would make some smartass remark about how Kai only found time to actually use his head at the worst possible time. Or maybe they wouldn’t and they’d understand. But he wasn’t going to try his luck. He’d rather protect himself than be vulnerable in a way he knew would hurt if they didn’t take him seriously. 

But this time he wasn’t lying in bed thinking about all the morbid things that came with being a ninja. This time he was glaring daggers at the stupid red bracelet tied neatly around his wrist. Because what the hell? 

It was so nice  and sweet and yet.. Still the most sinister gift he’s ever received. Because while it left him with this feeling of hope and joy, he was also afraid that the same hope that was so innocently sitting on his wrist would burn him. He was the fire ninja and he was afraid of getting burned. How ironic was that?

Kai draped his arm over his eyes. 

..And the smug look on Jay’s face when Kai couldn’t fight back the rising heat in his cheeks. Ridiculous. 

It was fair when they stood on equal ground. When they met on a mutual battlefield. But now Kai’s gone and dug himself into a trench. No. He’d fallen into it. He liked Jay. Dammit. And he let him win. 

Kai kicked his legs in the air in frustration before sitting up. That’s it. If Jay thought he was going to get away with this he was sorely mistaken. It was on and he was going to go all out. Go big or go home right? Right. 

And a month later the plan was kicking into motion.

“Can you remind me why we have to dress up again?” Jay asked. 

“We’re going undercover, I already told you.”

“Oh okay.” 

Kai wasn’t sure if Jay actually believed him or not but he was going to take it. On the one hand that could’ve read as a sarcastic remark because no Kai wasn’t the smartest tool in the shed and didn’t think this plan all the way through BUT Jay was also the type to just take things as they were.. For a bit. At least until it finally settled in that he didn’t actually know what he was doing then he’d start questioning again. Which Kai was banking on it not being for a while. 

“Well are you ready?” Jay looked up at him expectantly. 

Kai would have loved to say ‘Yes’. He really would have. Except.. 

“I just realized I don’t know how to tie a tie,” his lips drew into a thin line. What he’d done certainly wasn’t right. He knew Jay wanted to laugh. He knew it. Kai didn’t even have to look up at the dumb amused smile on Jay’s stupid face to know that. But he did anyway. And sure enough there he was trying his hardest to hold one back. 

Kai rolled his eyes and looked down again, the embarrassment washing over him just a little too roughly. 

“What, really?”

“Yeah. Never really been invited to events and stuff growing up and well I mean who was gonna teach me anyway even if I had been?” his mouth snapped shut as soon as the words left his mouth. Sure he had a streak of not knowing when to hesitate but god damn since when had it gotten this bad? Probably a while ago. This was not the time to bring up his fucked up childhood and admittedly he wanted to move away as quickly as possible before he could get any sort of response dripped in pity. 

But in true Jay fashion, the comment was the last thing he was worried about. And in true Jay fashion.. he was also full of surprises. 

Before Kai could even apologize or change the subject, there were hands slowly guiding themselves around Kai’s neck. They were Jay’s, that much he could process before his brain started buffering. He couldn’t say anything or even react to the extent that he was internally. Which was absolute chaos. 

Kai’s eyes flickered to the red fabric of the tie and lingered there for a second as he watched it being carefully tied in a way he knew would take him a while to master. His eyes wandered to the soft hands at work and he briefly wondered how they weren’t rough and scarred considering all the tinkering Jay did on top of ninja work. And then finally his eyes landed on Jay’s face and the way it was too adorably scrunched in concentration with his tongue sticking out and all. 

It took him far too long to realize when Jay was finished and he begrudgingly added another point to Jay’s side of the scoreboard in his head. 

Kai had to stop letting him stun him into silence. 

..Some other day. 

Because now they were staring at each other with Jay’s hands frozen in place on Kai’s chest and suddenly Jay was leaning in too close and- It was a kiss. It was a little messy and not at all how Kai imagined this going if it ever happened at all. But it was a kiss. And it was still perfect. 

Kai had wondered before if he’d feel a spark of electricity or if Jay would be able to feel the hot fire that burned Kai’s body without mercy on his lips. Now he had the answer. Or at least half of one. But suddenly it wasn’t important anymore. Suddenly it couldn’t even come close to it being his first thought when he could taste the sweetness of Jay’s favorite banana yogurt on his tongue. Or when he tried to imagine literally anything softer than this moment but only came up short on that end as well. Or when his hand cupped the other ninja’s freckled cheek and it fit there like it had always meant to be there. 

They pulled away after a few beats and Kai’s eyes snapped open and all too suddenly he was pointing an accusatory finger at Jay.

“You ruined it!”

“..Huh?” Poor Jay looked so lost and a little dazed. 

“Your ruined it!” Kair repeated as if that helped any. “I was supposed to trick you into this whole “mission” thing,” he threw up air quotes “but really I was GOING take you to this very nice dinner that the whole team helped out with and surprise you!” 

“And.. why can’t we still do that?” Jay looked at him like he was crazy and like he didn’t understand a damn word Kai was saying. Which.. fair.

“Because the whole point was to eventually tell you how I feel tonight and you were supposed to be so shocked by it and I’d get to see the look on your face and revel in it and finally get my revenge!”

“Huh..? Revenge for what?”

“THE BRACELET!” Kai held up his arm and pointed at his wrist where, sure enough, the red bracelet was still clinging to. 

It took Jay a second or two but soon enough the realization was starting to dawn on him. And he laughed. The bastard laughed while Kai was fuming and beat red from the whole thing. 

“But you beat me again,” Kai dragged a hand down his face and clasped his hand over his mouth trying to hide his blush as much as possible. “You got me. You beat me. I’m the most flustered and I-” he choked trying to form a coherent thought. Feelings were hard, how did he ever think he’d be able to push out an actual confession that night? 

“You were one step ahead and I look like the fool again for letting this affect me so much.” In true Kai fashion he didn’t understand immediately that Jay having kissed him first meant something very very important. He wasn’t smart and he never claimed to be in his defense.

“Kai.”

“WHAT?” 

Jay looked like he was considering something before eventually huffing a breath of air through his nose and shaking his head in disbelief.

“You know I gave that to you on Valentine’s Day right?”

“What?”

Jay pointed to the bracelet.

“Valentine’s Day. I was goooing to ask you out but. You kinda just stormed off like the whole thing pissed you off so.” 

Oh.. OH. Kai was an idiot. He didn’t know how many times he’d have to repeat to himself that he was just flat out stupid until his braincells got the memo and actually did their job.

“I’ll give you twenty bucks if you agree to never talk about this again.”

“Throw in a kiss and you’ve got yourself a deal.” 

“Deal.”

“Now how about that Dinner?”

Jay would later make fun of Kai for perfectly timing his whole scheme to fall on White Day. To which Kai would slide him another twenty to have the blue ninja pretend like he thought Kai had done it on purpose.

 Next year he would get him back on purpose. 

[takerfoxx]

The Owl House, Season 2, Episode 9, "Eclipse Lake," First Impressions!

And so the rivals meet.

And the masks come off.

Literally.

I know I open each review praising this season, but I can't help it. It's been such a drastic leap in quality from the first to the second season that I am continually impressed. We get plot threads and lore that was so noticeably missing in season 1, and delivered so well. The animation is incredibly impressive, to the point where each episode's climax feels like it could be a season finale. We get some awesome new characters, wonderful interactions, cathartic emotional moments...

And Lumity is canon.

REMEMBER ALL THOSE TIMES WHERE I SAID THAT I HOPED THAT THEY WOULD PULL THE TRIGGER MID-SEASON SO WE WOULD ACTUALLY GET SOME EPISODES OF THEM BEING GIRLFRIENDS? I GOT WHAT I WANTED!

But before we get to that, the episode decides to just casually drop a bomb on us.

We get to see Emperor Belos's face.

(ignore the red circles, it's the only image I could find so early)

Now, I've seen a lot of people express disappointment that such a threatening villain has such a non-threatening real face, horrific scars aside, but I really like this look, even with the "kindly" expression.

See, Belos already has a classic villain look, and it's awesome. But this add an even more uncomfortable dimension to him. Evil often wears a fair face, and you can honestly see how someone like Belos could keep such control over Hunter.

And let's be clear: Belos and Hunter's relationship is 100% abusive. It's a mixture of flattery and cruelty that creates a very uncomfortable dynamic. Hunter is basically dependent on Belos for validation, and fears disappointing him above all, and Belos knows this. It's very...Horde Prime, I guess.

Now, if you'll recall, I was supportive of the theory that Belos is Philip Wittebane. Now that I see his face, I'm not so sure, as that ravaged ear could go either way. I would not be at all surprised if he and Hunter are Philip's descendants though. It would explain their lack of natural magic if they were part human. If he's not Philip, Belos having gone to the human world in the past is very interesting.

Though you know who he reminds of? Principal Bump. I wonder if they're related.

Also, I noted that Belos is studying something called the Grimwalker. Whatever that is, it cannot bode well.

Meanwhile, back at the Owl House, another victim of an abusive parental figure is very much trying her best! Luz is sick with the "common mold," and since she's human, it's really hitting her hard, so Amity is taking charge to be an awesome girlfriend and do everything she can to take care of her. And she has enlisted Gus, Willow, and Hooty to help.

Poor Amity. She's come a long way, but she still hasn't shaken the damage her parents had done to her. She still judges herself by her usefulness to others, and now that Luz is the most important person in her life, she's still terrified of letting that person down, possibly getting rejected as a result. Of course that won't happen, as Luz is Luz, but that's not a mode of behavior you can just shake off.

Also, I do note that Gus and Willow are really starting to feel so first season. I'm not saying they lack depth or don't have a place, but considering how much growth all the characters have had, they do kind of feel like they're just fulfilling the supportive friend role instead of acting as fleshed out characters in their own right.

Though King namedropping Lofi-Beats did make me pop.

Meanwhile, Eda's got her own thing going, specifically trying to figure out how to change into the harpy at will. Which involves knockoff Dragon Ball Z for some reason? Which she apparently saw in theaters when it first came out three decades ago? I know she made multiple trips to the human world, but how much of that time was spent just binging on anime?

ANYWAY, though Luz is really sick and out of it, she manages to coax another bit of information from the echo mouse, and that is she'll need some of the Titan's blood in order to go home. And apparently the best sort is a place called Eclipse Lake.

Which is where the increasingly paranoid Kikimora is currently staging operations.

And where Hunter heads in order to one-up her.

You see where this is going.

It was very interesting watching Hunter and Amity interact, since they're so similar in how they've been manipulated and abused by their guardians and the ridiculously high standards they set for themselves, whereas Luz, the person that connects is their absolute foil. And I honestly don't think Hunter was trying to manipulate Amity when he misinterpreted Luz's texts. That is just how he feels about things. That's how much Belos has messed him up. And while Amity is further on the path to healing, she still has a way to go. That's how Hunter was able to get into her head so easily. She's terrified of being rejected by Luz. Luz is the only person that makes her feel good about being, well, herself.

I'm going to skip over a good chunk of this episode and get to the really good part. Namely, the fight between Hunter and Amity. Oh, my God, it was so awesome. The animation, the direction, seeing how far Amity has come as an abomination-centered witch, see Hunter display a host of new abilities from accepting Rascal as his palisman (which does...raise questions), to that final confrontation. I did notice Amity breaking the key as soon as that cracking sound happened, so she has some Titan's blood to work with. There's more in the key Hunter now has, but is it enough? And now that he has accepted his palisman, how much is that going to change between him in Belos? Because Belos is totally going to find out.

But yeah, stellar climax. They're really breaking the bank this season.

So, let's review: Belos has the portal, but no key. Hunter has the key, but it's cracked and doesn't have enough Titan's blood. The Owl House gang have some Titan's blood, but whether or not it's enough to get Luz home remains to be seen.

Also, Kikimora! Relax! Jesus.

[honeypirate]

Old Friends part three

parts 1 and two on my masterlist here

Bakugou Pro!Hero x Pro!hero female reader

I don’t know much about Bakugou’s new hero name, like reasoning behind the change, i don’t read the manga, but I am aware of the new name so I use it because this is set in the future, i don’t know if it is a spoiler anymore or not lol 

I probably should have reread the other parts just in case I forgot anything but oh well. Here’s this part that might have a lot of errors haha. 😘

Also sorry for using a Spotify link and then a YouTube link and not just both the same site but I don’t want to change it because I don’t know if many people will even click them XD

The links for the hero outfit go to Pinterest

You get to the office and Bakugou introduces you to their secretary at the front desk, “this is, Mina, she takes calls and files the paperwork for cases we take from the public, we check in with her when we get here and she gives us...” Mina takes out a small black box and places it on the desk while he talks “ear pieces that connects us all to each other and to her when we need her to give us information.” you all three take an ear piece and you smile at the small girl, she had an intimidating air about her and you liked that “it’s nice to meet you!” you say with a small bow and she bows back to you “you as well, Guardian” her use of your hero name didn't bother you, on the walk over Kiri had mentioned that Mina’s quirk allowed her control over who is and who isnt allowed to enter the building, once she knows your face she can allow you to always enter, so if any one wanted to come meet to request assistance they needed to book an appointment first to be confirmed, after she runs intense background checks. 

You head into the women’s locker room to change into your hero suit before the meeting, the familiar feeling of excitement and anxiety knotting its way into your stomach, the calm before the storm of a mission. You put in your headphones and hit play on your mission playlist, a playlist that you and Bakugou made together in high school specifically to get in the right head space before work. It’s since been added to but still has the original songs you both came up with, they always worked to get your head in the game. 

(this is the song that plays this link takes you to spotify)

Once you’re dressed in your usual hero attire,(( outfit  but gloves like this tho))

You stash your bag, phone, and street clothes in a locker that was provided, you place the ear piece in a pocket and exit the room quietly singing the song from your playlist that was now stuck in your head. “I drew stick figures of you and me, don't you agree? We would make-” “the best team, better than the 96 Bulls ever were” Bakugou cuts you off, saying the rest of the line you were singing, you turn to see him leaning against the wall outside the locker room, waiting for you, you smirk and tilt your head “you’re still listening to ‘Y/N and BK get pumped?” He chuckles at your question “I will keep listening to it for as long as it works” he reaches up and messes with your cowl, running his fingers across the edge, “same here” you feel nostalgic and your chest fills with butterflies as he looks you over “I like your new suit” he nods approvingly “I like your new name” you quip back and he laughs “thank you. I felt it fit better. Our meeting is in here” he says and points to the door across the hall. You nod once and follow him into the meeting room. 

 You're sat at a conference table with many heroes, most you recognize but there is one man that you don't, he seems familiar but you don’t pay too much attention. Bakugou was seated in front of you at the rectangular conference table and Kirishima was to his left explaining the situation. “Thank you all for showing up to aid us with this mission, I’ll get right into it, over the past few weeks students from UA have been going missing. Up until recently we had no idea who they were or why they were doing this. The last victim to be kidnapped was a young student named Juliette” you got the goosebumps, ‘it could be a coincidence’ you thought as you looked at Kirishima as he spoke  “the two previous victims were girls with the same name and all girls are 17. We still don't know why they are doing this but we now have a name.” a man comes up on a TV screen on the wall behind Kirishima and on the TV behind you, a man you knew well, your eyes are glued to the screen as pictures flash across the screen of him with his associates and him with the victims. You’re grateful for your cowl that hides your emotions that are on the surface. Your memories coming back to you in waves, meeting him on the bus one night when you were doing your internship in America, pretending to be interested in him and his goals. Making him fall in love with you just to lock him up. Stomach acid burned your throat as you watched the pictures change. 

Your thoughts are chased away as you feel someone nudge your leg with their foot, your eyes immediately flick to Bakugou who is staring right at you with his brows furrowed. He could always read you, you weren’t surprised that hasn't changed. You reach out with your foot and gently touch the inside of his ankle up to his knee, deciding to use him as a distraction for your brain. When you notice his cheeks subtly dust with pink you smirk and then turn your attention to Kirishima, now with more resolve. 

“The group of villains calls themselves The Red Ox. We know their usual hideouts but so far they've been all empty, we have sights on them 24/7 to see if they return. We need to gather whatever information we can and find them as soon as possible. We will be working directly with the police to get these girls back.” ”Red, can I speak?” your hand is a little raised,  he nods “go for it” you stand up and point to the TV “the guy in the middle, his name is Robin, the other two wearing masks are part of his quirk, when I knew him in California five years ago he went by the name Triple Threat. Last I knew we captured him and he was imprisoned in America. The kids,” your voice breaks and you clear your throat to cover your true feelings and feel a little comfort when Bakugou's shoe gently touches yours again, “the kids are a message. We caught him because I went undercover with the name Juliette Simmons and became his sidekick, ending up breaking his heart and apparently making him obsessed with me. He knows I went to school at UA, I don't know what he is going to do but I think he wants me.” 

 The hero you don't recognize speaks up “since Guardian here knows him and failed to stop him before then it's kind of her fault? Can’t she just use her powers to manipulate him and capture them anyway? I don’t see why we’re needed” the hero crosses his arms in his chair and sends a look of disgust your way. Your hands curl into fists against the table, you’re about to stand up for yourself but before you can Bakugou beats you to it, his fists clenched as little blasts go off against his palms. He looks more pissed than you've ever seen him, he looks downright feral,  “your attitude is not helping us find these girls any quicker, you're causing unnecessary tension and not to mention being a complete dick. You know her hero name? So that means you understand her power? Her quirk costs a price to use, Dumbass. If she does something substantial it takes the price from her. If you're not going to work with us as a team then you can leave. We don’t need you.” the unknown hero gets up and walks out in a huff and you sit down quietly, throwing a glance at Kiri who sighs “was that really--” “yes!” Bakugou cuts him off and then sits. “Continue, Guardian'' he then says calmly with a nod at you.  

“Robin was a student at the university in the same town where I had my internship. He was obsessed with human experiments to see if he could use his quirk to separate other people into threes like he does with himself. We should contact heroes in the US and ask for their files and see if they know how he got here instead of being in prison. Last I knew he was sentenced to life” Kirishima nods “Mina?” He says and the secretary who was sitting down at the end of the table opens her laptop “on it” she says and starts typing with inhumanly quick speed. You glance at Bakugou and he gives you a look that you can tell means he’ll talk to you later. 

After more research and phone calls to your old teachers you all split up into pairs to go look around places he might be, a few hospitals reported thefts of medical supplies and blood banks as well, there were also reports that civilians had seen him in a few shopping centers buying clothing. Kirishima gives everyone orders, he pairs you and Bakugou and gives you the task to go around the hospitals and see if you can find out anything more than the police had, you also wanted to check out a bar you think he would have liked if he was the same as when you knew him. “Send all your information to Mina, she will make files for everyone to have tomorrow at the next meeting. Let’s go”  the sound of chairs rolling back on the tile fills your ears, you glance at Bakugou and he gestures for you to wait, you nod and stay standing near the table waiting for the rest of the heroes to file out of the meeting room. Kirishima gives you a reassuring smile before being the last one to disappear.

“What’s up?” you keep your voice quieter since the room was now empty, “that’s the guy you were dating before?” His voice is calm, hiding how he really felt, which was embarrassed for bringing him up earlier, he didn’t know how you felt about it but he knew how hard going undercover was especially when feelings are involved. You give a simple nod and his brows furrow even deeper than they were. “I know how hard those missions can be. I’m.. uh.. We.. are always here to talk if you need someone” you can't help the warm fuzzy feeling that surrounds your heart. You place your arm on his bicep “Thank you, for being here for me after all these years and for standing up for me earlier. You’ve grown into an amazing hero and an even better man. Now what do you say we go and kick some ass?” 

You left him with tingles in his arm where you touched him and butterflies in his stomach thinking about what you've said to him. He's been trying desperately these last years to grow into someone you can be proud of, you and his parents are the most important people to him, all that matters is that you are the ones who are proud of him. You don’t know how much it meant to hear you tell him those things. your voice breaks the silence “We’re here” “where is here G? This isn’t the hospital.” you let out a dry humorless chuckle “no but this is just the kind of place he would be at. I wanted to check here first since it was on the way” he nods once and holds the door open for you. 

Pain. White hot, searing, pain. You grab your head and fall to your right knee, letting out a scream from the pain before taking a big inhale and holding your breath to feel where the pain was coming from. It started in your skull then flooding down your spine and into every one of your pain receptors. “Dyna-'' you manage to gasp out, turning your attention to the hero beside you who is doubled over in the same amount of extreme pain, panting, his fists are tight at his sides with little explosions happening in the palms of his hands. His face is scrunched trying to control himself from blasting his way out. He needed to protect everyone else in this bar, there were so many innocents. You try to use your quirk to stop the pain at the source in your body but the more you tried the more waves of pain you felt. Once you manipulated it to stop it would just start in a different part of your body and spread out.  

“Oh my poor Juliette.. Or should I say y/n? Oops pardon me,  Guardian!” He waves his hand dramatically in the air and rolls his eyes “didn't mean to blow your identity” his voice was far away sounding like you were underwater, your eyes searched the room to see if you could find where it was coming from. Robin was walking over to you from the bar, a beer in hand, flanked by three identical girls who look like the first victim.”Don’t. Touch. Her” Bakugou's voice was tense with pain as he tried to move in front of you, Robin just laughed and motioned to the girls, after that Bakugou must have passed out from the amount of pain he was in, he fell to his face and was motionless. “Bastard” your voice comes out in a forced whisper, it was so hard to talk, you're just glad Bakugou is still breathing. 

 “This was far sooner than I was expecting but i guess i underestimated you” he crouches in front of you and you scowl, from the pain and from the rage you felt from him hurting Bakugou “the pain you’re feeling is from my associate here, which i’m sure you’ve figured out already, although shes attacking your nervous system, i don’t doubt you’ll figure out how to get past the pain, making yourself indestructible inside and out, then you’ll be able to stop her with your quirk so i unfortunately have to be quick.” your mind is swimming, you felt queasy and clammy, you spit at him and he laughs before motioning to the triplet girls who hold up their hands, you thought you felt pain before that was nothing compared to now. A maniacal laugh fills your ears and you pry your head up to look at Robin again “my poor doll.” he strokes your face and you gag, you would have bit him if you could have moved more through the pain. You start at your feet and use your quirk to manipulate your cells to accept the pain, to grow and adapt with the pain, slowly regaining your control over yourself without moving a muscle so they wouldn’t suspect. out of the corner of your eye you see the other two of Robin’s bodies keeping the rest of the bars customers at bay. Come on, y/n think! What is the best course of action? 

“Again! Gaining movement quicker than i thought!” his laughter is crazier than you remember, your body tingles with bad feelings and tension underneath all the pain  “we still have many things to do before the final phase of my plan, so we will have to be going now, next time we meet it will be when I have planned it, I can guarantee you that. But first, what i need is this” he reaches out and cuts off a piece of your hair, you reach out and grab his wrist tight “why..do you need... that?” you spit out and he just laughs more and caresses your cheek “all in due time my doll. All in due time” he turns to the triplets who crank up your pain again, making you scream, dropping his wrist and falling to your elbows on the floor of the bar. You’re barely aware of his speaking again, and barely aware of his kick to your ribs before he walks out the bar laughing, the triplets and his other two bodies following him. 

You hear voices far away, your mind is cloudy, you feel like you’re sinking through mud. Memories of your childhood with Bakugou run through your head as you sink into the darkness 

“You fought Deku?” Your voice was soft, standing with him in the empty stairwell of the dorms. He doesn’t say anything, just nods once, his usual scowl on his face. “Katsuki” you whisper and see his hard exterior softens for a moment, his scowl turning into a look of grief, you softly take his hand that was in a fist by his side, and pull him to you, wrapping your arms around his neck and running your fingers of your left hand through his soft hair. He breaks then, his hot tears hitting your neck and shoulder as he curls into you, his arms tight around your middle and you feel his sobs rack through his body. You softly hum the song stuck in your head, Lookers by The Menzingers, while rubbing his back with one hand and the other still in his hair. You loved him then. You love him now. 

Bakugou is holding your hand sitting beside you in the ambulance headed to the hospital, you’ve been out for a long time and he's starting to get worried, he came to right when Robin kicked you and he was filled with rage, he wished he wasn't still being affected by the triplets, he would have killed him right then if he could. Seeing you hurt like this brought back feelings he didn’t think he had anymore, he didn’t want to lose you. He didn’t want to see you in pain.

He assumed that when the pain left his body that they were too far away for the girls quirk to work anymore. He pulled you into his arms and checked your pulse, it was too faint to fill him with anything but worry, he presses the button on his ear piece “Mina we need an ambulance, the bar on 25th, Guardian is down” not even one second passes before shes talking back “they’ll be there in two minutes” he looks up at the bystanders “the police will be here in a few minutes! is everyone else okay?” the bar owner comes around and up to him “everyone is fine, how is she?” Bakugou's lips form a tight line “She’s alive. That’s all I know” 

Your senses slowly return to your body, the bed you’re in isn’t very comfortable, you feel a hand clutching yours and something wet on your fingers. Your eyes flutter open and your stomach flutters at the sight. You’re in a hospital room and Bakugou is sitting next to your bed, holding your hand in his with his forehead resting on the top, the wetness on your fingers were his tears. Your stomach fills with butterflies as you remember your dreams of him, you knew your new found feelings would complicate things but you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

“What happened?” your voice is soft, drained, his head snaps up and you see his bloodshot eyes and wet cheeks. You smile and place your hand on his cheeks, brushing away his tears. “I was so worried” his voice cracks and you bring your other hand over to cup his face “I hope I didn’t cause you too much trouble” you brush away the last of his tears and he brings your palm to his lips, kissing it softly. “Not too much, but more than I would have liked.” You nod and your voice is barely a whisper, your eyebrows drawn together “I wish I could have protected you from whatever she did” he shakes his head and takes your hands in both of his “it’s not your fault. We will get them next time. Now we know more about what we’re up against” you nod but your feelings of guilt still linger in your chest. 

Recovery Girl fixed you up and you did what you could to manipulate your cells back into shape. You and Bakugou give your statements to the police then you head back to the office to give your reports to Mina as well as report back to Kirishima. By the time you got back to the office it was after midnight, you didn’t expect this all to take so long. You stop outside the office and grab Bakugou's hand, the trip back was quiet, just listening to the sounds of the city not knowing what to say to each other yet. “Are you okay?” You squeeze his hand and he nods “I’m alright” you cup his cheek again “do you mind if I..” he chuckles “do whatever you want. I trust you” your cheeks flush and you nod, bringing your other hand up to his cheek. You close your eyes and focus on the feeling of your quirk, scanning through the cellular makeup of his body, you saw the pain receptors that were damaged in his body and fixed them, unblocking some of the receptors in his palms that would hinder his quirk, you see his cells like a constellation behind your eyes, brightening the dull spots and making sure each aura flowed smoothly. Little things like this didn’t take much, just a little of your energy with no other repercussions. When you open your eyes he’s looking right into yours, a smile on his lips “do you know when you do that, you get a little aura that looks sparkly, like stars. Like you’re my personal guardian angel” you chuckle “it only happens if I have personal feelings towards the person I’m helping. It’s also the reason behind my hero name” you smile, dropping your hands from his cheek and saying “let’s go” you walk into the office, Bakugou right behind you, already overthinking your somewhat of a confession. 

Kirishima hugged you the moment he saw you “I’m so glad you’re alright” he hugged Bakugou the same way and you smiled when Bakugou actually hugged him back. “I finished the paperwork for you guys from what the police had sent over to me. You guys should go home and order delivery and we will continue this conversation there. There is nothing we can do about any of this tonight so we should rest up.” You frown but agree. Heading into the locker room to change back into your street clothes before heading out. “Y/n” Bakugou breaks the silence between you “hmm?” You glance over at him and he looks worried “if you’re thinking that you’re going to be forced to use your quirk in a big way, please don’t. At least not yet. Give us a few days to form a strategy and plan. We can figure it out. I don’t want anything to happen to you. Not like before.” you let out a sigh and reach out your hand to him, silently asking him to take it, he doesn’t hesitate to lace your fingers together and squeeze your hand. you think through the last time you used your quirk in an extreme way, your last year of school there was another villain attack on the school, half of the buildings were destroyed, several people were injured and could die, you were in a panic and seeing Bakugou hurt pushed you over the edge, you couldn’t help but fix it. you used your quirk and reversed all the destruction and pain that was caused. bringing the villains back to be captured and making sure everyone was fine, everyone but you. your quirk needed to be paid so it took it from you, almost every bone in your body was broken and your muscles were torn, the pressure form your quirk wrecked your body. that was the first time you saw Bakugou cry out in the open around others, when he found you struggling to breathe because of the blood in your lungs, laying in the middle of training ground beta, he felt just as broken. if it wasn’t for Recovery Girl being on campus you probably would have died. your body simply isn’t as powerful as your quirk is. 

 You squeeze his hand three times “I don’t want that to happen either, I want to save those girls and figure this out without having to use my quirk like that. but it’s so frustrating to know that with a snap of my fingers I could fix this all, especially with the hair he took from me, what the hell could he need that for?! but something this big, the repercussions would be extreme, it would break every bone in my body and that’s the least it would do. but it makes me feel guilty like I’m putting my life above theirs and I don’t feel that way. I’m not better than anyone.their lives are worth the same as mine. What if he can use my hair and DNA to replicate me? or what if he uses it to control me? I don’t want anything to happen because of me, maybe what would be best would be stopping him right now no matter what happens to me” he takes a deep breath, thinking about what you’ve said “I hear you, I understand what you’re saying. the quickest option is not always the best option. there are too many unknown repercussions if you used your quirk that we have to factor in and figure out. we’ll bring it to the table tomorrow and discuss options.” his voice softens, like it was full of an emotion you couldn't name, “I never want to see you like that again. if we can figure this out without you having to use your quirk to that extent, then i think we should try that first” you reach the apartment then and Bakugou unlocks the door and lets you go in first. he closes the door and turns toward you with his arms out, you chuckle softly before walking into his embrace. you turn your head and lay your cheek against his chest, the sound of his heartbeat comforting to you “I know you’re right. we should eat and sleep on this and then we can decide more with everyone tomorrow. thank you for reminding me i’m not alone” he rubs his hand in circles across your back, you feel so vulnerable in his arms right now, all the walls you thought you had from not seeing him in years have broken down, you pull back and look up at him, noticing all his new scars on his chin and neck from the fights hes had, his stubble on his cheeks and jaw, hes grown into such a handsome man. his hand cups your cheek “i’ll always be here for you” he whispers and his thumb brushes across your lower lip, sending shivers down your spine and making your cheeks blush “Katsuki” your voice is barely above a whisper, his cheeks blush when you say his name, your eyes flutter close as he leans down, his lips ghost over yours and your body floods with butterflies and tingles. Your hands tangle in his hair and he pulls you tighter against his chest, your lips press harder against his, when he nips at your bottom lip you can’t help but giggle and he smiles at the sound, take the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, making you moan quietly and melt against him.

The sound of a key in the lock scares you both and you both step away from each other at the same time, one second before Kirishima walks in the door. You chuckle and turn away from the door, walking into the kitchen to get some water, so that Kirishima wouldn’t see your red face or swollen lips. Kiri is either oblivious or really good at acting like it, he throws his stuff down and says “the only take out place open is pizza! I ordered some on the way home so let’s shower and then we can eat and talk more. I have some ideas about the hair.” “Y/n go take the first shower” Bakugou orders and you chuckle as you meet his eye, you wink at him “okay boss” you chuckle again and he rolls his eyes “what do I get for trying to be nice? Mocked” he grabs his bag and heads to his room.

You grab your sweats and your underwear and head into the bathroom to shower, you take this ten minutes of alone time to clear your head as you stand under the hot water as it eases your muscles. You exit the shower and wrap yourself in a towel, deciding to brush your teeth just in case you get another opportunity to kiss again, and then get dressed.

“Fuck” you say and sigh, looking at yourself in the mirror, you had bruises across your ribs but that wasn’t the reason you swore. You forgot a shirt so you were standing in your sweats and a naked top. You look at your dirtyclothes and frown, you didn’t really want to put back on your dirty shirt, you raise a hand and put it against the towel that was now wrapped around your head, you guess you could just walk to your room down the hall in a towel, *knock knock* “are you okay?” Bakugou’svoice made you smile, you cover your chest with an arm and open the door a little to look out at him, lucky you he had his pajamas in his hands. You reach out the crack in the door and grab his hand, pulling him into the bathroom with you. “Whoa what are you doing?” He voice sounds a little worried and his cheeks flush when he realizes you’re not wearing a shirt, he looks up at the ceiling and you take his shirt from his hands “you’re my hero Bakugou” you say and laugh as you turn around so your back is towards him “holy fuck” he whispers when he sees your bruises, he can’t help himself as he reaches out, his fingers brushing softly against your skin makes you gasp, the shirt was over your head now and your towel on the sink “sorry” his voice was soft “I’m so sorry I couldn’t stop him from hurting you” your face blushes and you pull the shirt all the way down before you turn back to look at him.

You cup his cheek “hush” you smile softly before realizing he needs to shower “we can talk after you shower, I’ll leave” he grabs your wrist softly “you can stay. We can talk now. I mean if you’re not uncomfortable” he blushes at what could be implied. You know him better than that tho. “If you don’t mind.” You laugh and then sit up on the counter top next to the sink turning your head to look at your hands in your lap as he undressed.

Once he’s in the shower, the scent of his body soap fills the air, “remember that girl that liked you in high school?” He laughs “which one?” You scoff “lady killer over here.” You jest and then clear your throat “I mean the one during graduation” your voice was quieter when you asked, you thought that it was best to get this talk over with before you did any more kissing. The water shuts off and he grabs his towel, wrapping it around his waist before opening the shower curtain, you gasp at the sight of his bare chest and stomach, the way water was dripping down his shoulders, his hair stuck to his forehead and neck. You gulp and then sit up straighter and he closes the distance between you. “Come with me. I need something from my room if we’re going to finish this conversation.” He picks up his dirty clothing and his pajamas and you grab your clothes too, following him from the bathroom. You put your dirty clothes in your room before walking back to his, wringing your hands out the whole way. Nervous flittering in your belly. What could he possibly need in his room to be able to talk about that? You knock on the door softly and he opens it with a smile, now in sweats with the towel around his neck, his eyes looked anxious but excited. You raise your eyebrows as you enter, he clears his throat and closes the door, catching Kirishima giving him a thumbs up before it closes all the way. You let out a shocked laugh when he faces you again and you see what he’s holding “Is that my letter?”

[whetstonefires]

mcu ethics bad

The thing is that, while I was angry at Tony during Age of Ultron, particularly when he rode over Bruce’s compunctions about building a giant combat super-robot and pressured him into the project like a very very bad friend who happened to also be wrong...

...and when he equipped Hulkbuster armor and fought the Hulk in the middle of a city rather than attempting de-escalation or attempting to haul the Hulk out into the giant adjacent desert....

(And my suspension of disbelief snapped like a frayed cable when he brought down a skyscraper that had had no time to be evacuated on a street full of fleeing people and the only reason we were given to believe he hadn’t just cold-bloodedly created massive civilian casualties was that he told his AI to find the impossible magic angle where doing this wouldn’t kill anyone...)

While I was angry with him then, and unspeakably relieved that he recognized his own damage and retired at the end, haha psych, I was revolted by him during Civil War.

It’s supposed to make us sympathize with a character more, spending so much time with them, getting into their heads, being shown their emotional drives and reactions to things, and we spent so much time with Tony during that film, understanding his point of view. And...I did understand him. He’s not complicated. I even sympathized with his emotional state.

But in the context of his actions, throughout the film, I gazed into that understanding the way I did into Kylo Ren’s face in the seconds after he first unmasked. I see you, I know you, everything you are is written here, and the lines of your shame and self-revulsion are so thick upon you, and you should be ashamed but your self-destruction does not expiate or justify one jot of the harm you do.

Because everything Tony did in Civil War came from a place of selfishness. He was selfish all throughout that movie down to his very spine.

And selfishness isn’t itself necessarily bad--you need a little, to get through life, you have the right to your own portion of it. Your boundaries and your needs. But the type of selfishness that is forcing other people pay dearly for your emotional comfort and sense of control: no.

That is tyranny. That is not acceptable.

And you know how I know he was being selfish? Because his motive for pushing the Sokovia Accords was his personal guilt for the destruction of Sokovia.

But the Accords didn’t address that at all! They were tangential to the issue! None of the terms of the Accords would have saved Sokovia--in fact, the existence of them could easily have prevented the evacuation and harm-reduction the Avengers managed there, without saving a single soul.

The Ultron crisis was something Tony did, not as Iron Man but as Tony Stark, with Bruce Banner’s help, and which Wanda as criminal fugitive later helped exacerbate, and which all the other Avengers were involved in only to mitigate harm.

Legislation, or...treaties, idk, the UN isn’t actually empowered to pass laws so who knows what this thing was...aimed at preventing another Sokovia would mandate constant ethical oversight of billionaire science man’s mad science. At the very least! He never has to run things by ethics boards because he’s self-funded, at the very least let’s invent a mechanism to make up for that.

That would address the actual Sokovia issue, both in terms of risks and in terms of Tony’s personal guilt feelings.

But no one suggests that! It’s not even on the table! Because no one, certainly not any government, can tell Tony Stark what to do unless he lets them, that’s been a clear matter of record since Iron Man 2.

And because no one writing this legal instrument of whatever description was actually motivated by wanting to avoid another Sokovia, or even another ‘Wanda tries to neutralize a suicide bomber but merely gives him a different, smaller victim pool’ incident.

They didn’t care! They blatantly didn’t care! The entire thing was a ghoulish use of the dead to gain enough political leverage over the Avengers to put a leash on them!

(Which might not be a bad thing in principle, everything needs its checks, but when the last quasi-governmental organization you worked for turned out to be Nazis who were only prevented from staging a mass slaughter of undesireables by the skin of your teeth, I think you’re well within your rights to be very choosy about who you agree to obey, and to be firmly against pledging your honor to follow people whose first move was dishonest coercive tactics.

Actually you’re well within your rights to demand to negotiate the terms of even a much less sweeping contract, even without the Nazis. The whole approach to this thing stank to high heaven.

The fact that it was written by the UN like a treaty, expected to be signed by private individuals like a contract, and then enforced like a law except not because 1) laws are for everyone 2) if you break a law you get a trial not extrajudicial incarceration and 3) being pressured to consent to a restriction and then punished for refusing consent is hypocritical circular logic and in fact police corruption at its finest, all continues to show it was a bullshit nonsense franken-document.)

The whole movie is people ghoulishly using the dead to manipulate Tony into making bad decisions in response to his emotional pain. That’s. The plot of the film.

Then Zemo staged T’Chaka’s assassination and framed Bucky for it to raise the tension, ramp up the pressure, and prevent any sitting-down and talking reasonably through this, which might have allowed for the recognition of how extremely bullshit the entire concept was.

Tony was being used. Tony was a tool of bad people for most of that movie, and while Zemo banked on using his wrath for it, the politicos were leaning on his guilt.

And there’s honestly little I hold in deeper scorn than going out and hurting other people to assuage your own guilt and treating this as having the moral high ground. No. You don’t have the moral high ground on account of your guilt motivation. You have it if the actions you took were just, or at least could reasonably be assumed to have been so at the time.

And Tony fucking knew they weren’t. He didn’t even last to the end of the movie before recognizing that he’d been manipulated and fucked up, and doubling back.

That he then walked into a different manipulation, turned on a dime, and had to be stopped from doing a murder doesn’t unwrite that.

And it drives me nuts that people will say Tony was acting out of principle while Steve was acting out of personal attachment. Because sure, the Bucky thing was important, was the reason he was walking forward against all opposition instead of standing still to argue, but it wasn’t the reason Steve said no, while...

Tony wasn’t acting out of principle. Tony isn’t...very good at having principles. That’s not even a criticism or condemnation, it’s just how he functions. Since Iron Man he’s been substituting good intentions and emotional investment, which has worked out to varying degrees. It works best for huge, difficult, very straightforward decisions like ‘ride the nuke through the portal and save my hometown.’ It works less well for nuanced situations.

Tony was, as usual, acting out of emotion. And some awful shitheads who’d figured out where his levers were had calculated how to jiggle his emotion switches in the right places to make him do exactly what they wanted.

And you can tell he wasn’t acting out of principle because, for example, someone who was trying to get the superhero community under outside control for the sake of harm mitigation...

...well, firstly wouldn’t have chosen to stage a massive battle? But it’s possible someone in the UN specifically told him to do that, and in theory they at the very least signed off on it, presumably for its PR value of making Captain America look deranged and violent since it’s a deranged decision from every other angle, so yay, he can pass that responsibility up the chain and not have to angst about it, as promised.

But I was going to say would not have approached a minor who (this timeline takes pains to show us) had no prior experience of battle or even, somehow, serious violent crime, to recruit him to go be a government child soldier on another continent, without his guardian’s knowledge or consent. There were overtones of blackmail in Tony’s approach, before it turned out Peter was such a big fan he didn’t need that. What the fuck frankly.

That is not the action of someone who wants to start doing things by the letter, scaling the violence down, keeping within the law and putting the power of decisionmaking in other people’s hands because he’s realized he can’t trust his own.

And frankly even if he did act like that I wouldn’t necessarily support his choices, in particular his snap decision to behave coercively toward other Avengers with vastly less social power and security than he has.

And that’s the other thing! Everything about ‘Tony + Accords BFFs’ rings so hollow because he has never thought rules applied to him, and he knows perfectly well the entire time he’s fighting to force this surrender of agency down other people’s throats that he is going to be practically immune.

This man was technically a terrorist, proabably the most prolific single terrorist in world history until his rogue android exceeded his body count, but he was immune to prosecution because he was in tight with the United States military-industrial complex and basically untouchable due to his status within capitalism, and pursuing their international goals anyway. In the time between Iron Man and Iron Man II he was basically a one-man upgrade of the US drone program, and so good at it that the crest of blood he carved through the Middle East allowed him to announce he had ‘privatized world peace.’

(You are never going to get a world peace worth anything on the basis of a giant flying gun, okay.)

He went to war as a private individual, against non-state actors who were not directly threatening him, which is very much defined as ‘mass murder’ in all domestic and international law, and the US army in response sued him for control of his weapon. And lost! Lost.

No one attempted to press charges. No one. Because Tony Stark is above all that. And he knows it.

And like. I’m willing to accept the mass murder under the heading of ‘superheroing’ within the terms of this setting! Even if, after his vengeance rampage on his specific kidnappers, this violence was kept strictly off-screen for a reason. I did that! I bent that far! Genre convention!

But this history is kind of vitally important to any analysis of what he thought he was doing, and what he actually was doing, when he decided to become the iron gauntlet of the Sokovia Accords.

The currently active member of the Avengers who needed muzzling most was very manifestly Iron Man, and he knew even as he jammed the muzzle on all his comrades to make himself feel better that it would affect him the least, even if he didn’t finally retire for real this time. You don’t force Tony Stark. Not if you want anything out of it but blown up. You persuade him.

And once you have...oh, look at what he can do.

[shhhlikeme]

“Losty Aone” / “Losty Mountain Man🏔” Series:

Outtake Collection #17: (NSFW)

———————————

A/N: taglist, I did not post one with the last marathon so check if you missed collections 13-15 |

I had a lot of difficulty posting this so if it seems unfinished and you don’t see the taglist please let me know!

Also, MATURE CONTENT BELOW! NSFW!

TABLE OF CONTENTS

———————————

Poor Aone………………………………………’s sexual composure. 🥵🤯🤸‍♂️

That following Friday, In the calm Date Tech Hallway….

Like a hurricane, Kenji and a kanji ran over to Aone-san out of breath. 

“Aone!!!”

Used to his best friends being storms at home and at school, he turned to them at his locker. “Yes? Are you two okay?” 

Kenji made a dismissive gesture with his hand. “—Just dandy. We’re fine. But you’re not. Or, you won’t be. You’re supposed to help Y/N with her tryout video today right??!!!” 

Aone’s heart picked up speed, thinking about being alone with you again. He nodded. “Yes. Why? Is she alright?” 

“Cancel it.”

Beside Kenji, Kanji bounced on his own two feet, repeating the brunette with wide eyes. “Cancel it, cancel it, cancel it!” 

Aone looked confused. His best friends knew how much this plan meant to him, which included getting closer to you as a step, so he didn’t understand. Besides, they’d just spoken about it this morning and everything was fine. 

“I don’t understand…” Takanobu tilted his head to the side curiously. 

Kenji huffed. “Just trust us!!”

“Give me your phone Aone-senpai, I’ll call Y/N and cancel for you!!!” Kogane shouted, bustling in between the two of them to search Aone’s open locker…… for his phone, no doubt. 

Aone stepped to the side so that the setter could search his locker, knowing his phone was in his pocket. “Kogane-san, please calm down. Is anyone hurt or injured?” 

His friends looked frazzled as hell.

“No one is fucking hurt, you big giant. Just trust us when we say you need to cancel helping her film her stupid thing. Tell her to get a camera stand or pay one of the film geeks or something—“ 

“No.” Aone growled unintentionally. He didn’t mean to, he just really disliked the idea of another guy spending hours with the love of his life. Hewanted to help her. Aone removed the venom from his next words. “I want to see her, Futakuchi-san. You know that. What has gotten into you two—“ 

Kenji pinched the bridge of his nose, interrupting. “—Kusa said..... that apparently, Y/N’s cheer uniform had an issue with the order. The University—our University— sent her a uniform that’s a size or two too small. But she still has to submit her freaking audition in it and then they’ll apparently send her a new one, so—“

“I’ve seen Y/N in a cheerleading uniform before.” Aone stated calmly, feeling better now that he knows you weren’t involved in some incident or something. “You both really expect me to cancel on Y/N because of that?” Ridiculous, Aone wanted to add, but he didn’t. He tried his best to ignore, however, the way he felt a small stir in his lower belly because he recalled seeing you in the normal Date Teko cheer uniform. Not only is that cheer uniform what you were wearing the first time he ever laid eyes on you, but every male in this school—including the Mountain Man—thought you looked unbelievably hot in it. 

Before you noticed him, Aone almost ran into a pole once because he specifically saw you stretching in uniform outdoors with your team. Kenji pulled him from the pole’s path in the knick of time. 

Another time, When you were dating, Aone had gotten a huge boner after school just because he had received a text from him asking if your bra was showing through your white cheer top, with an attached photo of your chest. It was, in fact, transparent and Aone couldn’t think straight for the rest of his own practice. Coach was really mad at him that day….

Anyway, the point is that Aone has seen you in your attractive cheer uniform plenty of times. Perhaps his friends forgot?

“Aone-san, we can tell her that you’re sick, or that there is a family emergency or something, come—“ Kenji grabbed his best friend’s arm, steering him toward the exit. Aone let his friend turn him so that he does’t over exert himself like he usually did when he tried to move the all-muscle man, but he stopped just before they blocked the exit. 

‘Aone! TRUST ME. You cannot handle—“

“—I can and I will. Kenji. Please let me g—“ 

Just then, you entered through the exit doors a few feet away that Kenji was about to lead you out of, cutting Takanobu off and immediately heading his way. 

“Oh, hey, Aone! There you are!”

Aone:

Aone Takanobu can truly say—if he could speak—that he will never even question Futakuchi again. 

Kenji whistled under his breath when he saw you too. “Too late.” he muttered, folding his arms and a blush setting in. “See you at home.!” The brunette yelled as he grabbed Kanji, who was still searching the white haired’s locker—with one hand, using his other to plug his nose because was trickling a bit of blood. 

Upon seeing you, Aone felt as if all of the air in his lungs had been shaken out of his body like a damn salt shaker. He had to physically rub his eyes to make sure they were functioning correctly, and after he did that and you were still walking towards him, Aone pinched his own forearm, hard. 

Still, you were walking toward him. 

Fuck. This is real then.

Holy mother of God, Aone thought in a panic. This isn’t a wet dream?! It can’t be. He’s never seen that uniform on you before.

You stopped in front of Aone, ignoring the handful of boys that were drooling over you in your potential new post secondary school uniform. 

“Ugh. I said medium, not extra small. If I didn’t need a scholarship to make up for my grades, I wouldn’t go to this damn school. Just for this.” You grumbled, walking right past Aone to his locker that was left wide open. Without thinking, you reached inside and collected his huge Date Tech Volleyball jacket, swinging it over your shoulder and zipping it up. Aone had so many of these, and you loved them. You could practically hear the collective disappointed-male groan when you covered yourself completely. It reached the bottom of your kneecaps. 

When your eyes fluttered closed in pleasure because you were wrapped up in the most incredible warmth and scent in the world—Aone’s—you realized you had basically just performed theft, you looked down at your white cheer shoes sheepishly. “Oh my gosh. Sorry, Aone. Habit, I guess.” You apologized, too nervous to look up at him. Horny Mountain Man was in no position to respond coherently anyway, even if he didn’t want you wearing his stuff. 

Which, for the record, always makes me happy as fuck. 

Water. He thought. Water is what always helps in times like this. 

“Please, second.” Aone blurted, turning quickly to speed walk down the hallway to the nearest water fountain. It was tucked away in a corner to where he was hidden, so Aone alternated between taking big, big, very big gulps and splashing water on his face. Repeat.

You were wearing a form-fitting yellow cheer uniform. It said Pirates across the chest that it squeezed, exposed your entire stomach, and then yellow met your waist again in a really short pleated skirt (skort) that was barely covering your ass. Just seeing you in it for two seconds before you put on his jacket alone made Aone store that visual in his spank bank for tonight. Uh, for tonight x3.......or tonight x4........and then tomorrow morning, ……because the way that uniform fit you made him fantasize about doing every position in it….... ugh, Aone splashed more water on his face again. 

Back at Aone’s locker alone, You were so embarrassed in this uniform. You look like an absolute fool in a uniform so tiny, what the fuck?

Hearing a group of hurried footsteps coming from your left, from your two places you both turned to see a group of the biggest fuckboys in the school turning down this hall, searching for what Aone just knew was you with expectant expressions, positively gutted when they saw a giant jacket on you. 

You narrowed your eyes at the group in a glare, giving them a sickeningly sweet smile. “Hi, Fuck off 😊🖕.”

“Heya to you too, Y/N.” Said the guy you briefly gave a chance to before you met a real man like Aone. The baseball player. He had such a disgusting grin on his face, as if he was looking to bring you home or something. As if. 

Seemingly correct in deciphering what his look means, You had to hold down your lunch when he said, “Good luck with your online tryouts today. Care to show us that new uniform of yours?” He wiggled his eyebrows at you. 

“Nope, thanks. I just want to send my audition tape and solidify my future never seeing your ass again.” You snapped back. 

“Ouch, Y/N. We just heard it’s tryouts for the cheer squad today, and wanted to give all you ladies our sincerest thanks for being what awoke our hormones in first year. Is that so bad?” 

“Gross. You’re disgusting.”

“And you’re newly single, right? C’mon, I’m leaving the country after graduation for baseball. Consider it a parting gift,” The baseball player licked his lips and took one tiny step toward you. “I can stretch it out for you,” 

Takanobu—who was frozen in horny-for-Y/N-mode by the water fountain—was snapped out of it as soon as a threatening movement was made toward you. 

Aone understands very well that this was not a good position for any female to be in, but especially not the most important female in his life.  

Immediately, he was in front of you, completely shielding you from the other boys behind his broad, muscular body. 

Not knowing how the fuck this giant man can move that fast again, you couldnt help the breath of relief that left you, knowing you didn’t have to fight this battle anymore. Your knight has arrived. Your ex-knight. ☹️

“I’m sure you all have something else to do this afternoon.” Aone stated, trying to be as civil as possible. 

The baseball player threw his head back and laughed. “I definitely do…..but she’s just a regular student, not a cheerleader…… so it can wait. Oh, and—totally forgot to welcome you to the dumped-by-a-hot-cheerleader club—we’re all in it.” The baseball player gestured toward the group of boys he was in and they all laughed. 

Aone felt his heart break a bit, but his anger didn’t allow him to falter. Girlfriend or not, these boys didn’t respect the love of his life or any female in this school, and it was obvious. Nothing made him more upset.

“Come on bro, tell her to take off the jacket, we all wanna see her new uniform—“ the creep tried taking a step around Aone to get to you, so Aone stepped forward blocking that path, pulling you behind him again. 

“Take one more step toward her.” Aone growled in the smoothest voice. You couldn’t see it, but from experience with creeps trying to hit on you when you were together, you could tell Aone had his absolutely terrifying expression on and fit didn’t even mean to. The biggest teddy bear... that turned into your tough grizzly without the tiniest bit of hesitation if it meant protecting you.

 “I dare you.” Aone added, for good measure.

Needless to say, like always, the group of creepos saw how serious this giant could be, and then scurried away faster than they came. 

It turns out they’re not a fan of Aone’s dares.

You resisted every nerve in your body from acting on your instincts and grabbing Takanobu and kissing him as thanks for protecting you. Fuck, you just fell deeper in love with the man and if we are being g honest, hearing him become so respectfully protective like that, not only made your heart clench but your pussy clench as well. 

Aone turned to you and bowed in apology for speaking for you. 

You waved him off and thanked him wising words as you physically pressed your thighs together to keep yourself from throwing yourself on your ex and begging him to fuck your brains out like you wanted him to. Like he always did. Truth be told, you are so turned on. 

Needing fresh air, right the fuck now—you grabbed Aone’s arm and he allowed you to pull him outside to the empty football field since school was over. 

You found a small corner where you’d be hidden from prying eyes and it was a flat enough green surface for jumps and tumbling passes, so you liked it. you asked your beautiful Ex if it was fine to set up here for the audition. Daylight hit the area perfectly. 

Takanobu nodded, but then a slight blush fell over his face and you didn’t follow exactly why that was. “What is it?” You ask, using your hand as a visor. 

“Ummm,… this spot is fine Y/N. But I just realized that I forgot my flash in the photography studio.” 

You shrugged. “Oh! That’s it? Okay, that’s fine. I can just wait here and start stretching.” 

Aone’s pale cheeks darkened even more. You tried not to swoon. Oh my gosh he looked cute! But you still didn’t get why forgetting his flash made him so shy. 

“Aone, what is it? Is there something wrong?”

Takanobu looked away, willing himself to speak with conviction. “No, I apologize again. It’s just….” He willed himself to meet your eyes, because that’s what his plan told him to do. “Do you mind accompanying me? Uh, to retrieve the flash? I can carry everything, that’s not a problem, but— I just don’t feel comfortable leaving you out here alone just in case that group comes back and I’m not around.”

You inside: 

You sucked in a breath, trying so so sooo fucking hard not to shout how much you loved this man! If you were still dating, you would tackle him and showering his face with kisses right now, then probably tug him somewhere so you could drop to your knees and suck the soul out of his dick—that’s how much you loved him. 

“Oh, that’s so sweet.” You nodded, pressing your thighs together as you walked his side, in his jacket.

***

2 hours later, Aone is almost done filming your tryout tape. 

In the beginning, He managed to distract himself on his phone while you stretched, only stealing glances at you when you were in your splits (at which time Aone accidentally bit his tongue). 

Then the middle section of filming wasn’t sooo bad, you had to tell the camera about yourself—in which Aone thought you looked so pretty and thought you didn’t list enough of your good qualities, but he wouldn’t interject to tell you that— he filmed you doing a few technical jumps, some sideline hand-only cheers that you yelled out, and a few tumbling passes, which Aone was able to handle if he was thinking about dead squirrels like Futakuchi taught him. But that was as far as the dead squirrel strategy went for him. It had served its purpose and now Aone was running out of steam, because you had just completed the flyer positions section: where you had to contort your amazing body in flexible positions that literally made his urges to fuck you hard come back, God damnit…

Even though that was tough, Takanobu had a plan to follow and it included being able to spend time with you like this, so he had to put on a brave face and endure it. He was so proud of himself so far—even if he had to overheat in the volleyball sweater he had to put on to hide his protruding cock. It was sunny, not hot, which is good. And it did a great job hiding his crotch, so he wouldn’t dare take it off.

But truth be told, a part of Aone Takanobu felt absolutely foolish for not taking his friend’s offer earlier and cancelling on you. If seeing a cheerleading uniform on you in the past almost made him walk into a pole, I don’t think anyone could imagine how seeing you in a much sexier, college cheerleader uniform that is 2 sizes too small makes him feel now. Fuck. 

During the final portion of your tryout video, you had to showcase the choreography they taught you, and well, Aone was…………. He was……………

He was……………………

A/N: Imma try to just come out and say it.

During your dance segment…………………

You are of course, wearing that tiny new uniform, and Mountain Man is so fucking in love and horny for you, and you were also horny so you were unintentionally giving him bedroom eyes, and your dance for the tryout was semi provocative, and you are so flexible and bendy, slightly sweaty from over exertion, and did Aone mention that you are wearing that tiny uniform????

Yeah, this white haired beauty was going to cum untouched. 

Why? How? Well:

“So, Aone, for this part, I need you to tell me how I’m doing, Okay? I know you don’t know cheer very well but just in this dance section if I look sloppy or Im going too fast, I’d appreciate the feedback since my future relies on this. Is that Okay?”

The white haired beauty grunted in agreement, the sound actually hurting his throat because it was so dry. 

You smiled at him sweetly.

You looked so fucking cute, LostyAone.exe stopped working. 

“I need you to make sure the camera is getting my entire body, Okay? So that the judges can judge my footwork too. Can you pan down to make sure you’re comfortable with the movement?

Using the camera, Aone panned down liked you asked and nearly died. He was glad his eyes were hidden behind the camera because they just about fell the fuck out when he caught a really good glimpse of your delectable ass under your cheer skirt. Inside his brain,  dozens of little control-panel Aone’s erupted in chaos, running around his brain with towels trying to blow out the raging inferno in there.

SHE IS SO FUCKING SEXY, His mind yelled at him, as if he needed any more of a reminder. TOO SEXY, it repeated, and Aone’s dick twitched angrily in his pants. 

DEAD SQUIRRELS. DEAD SQUIRRELS. DEAD—OH, SHE’S SMILING AT US.

Takanobu briefly thought about the fact that this footage was only going to be seen by your prospective cheer captains, coaches, and himself— but he couldn’t help but wonder how he was going to edit all of this together in the time frame he promised he would with only one hand. The incessant desire he had to pump his cock to the look of you in that tiny uniform was practically all-consuming. So when he has to stare at constant footage of you alone in his room this weekend, well............. he’d probably need to take more breaks than he’s willing to admit. He needed this to end, and quick.

“So there is one move, Aone, that I need you to make sure that part gets a tiny close-up of. It’s this part where I flip why hair like this, then I have to run my hands from my neck dowwwwwwwn my body slowly and back up to do a mini chest pump… but that move I am switching it to a mini chest squeeze…, because the coach said she wants her team this year to have a lot of sex appeal and the ability to make the dances their own, so I thought I’d add that to show her I have what she’s looking for. What do you think?”

Wait, Sex appeal? Chest squeeze? As in, squeeze your breasts?! Like how? And Did Y/N just insinuate that she needs more sex appeal ? More than she already…….………..huh🥵? Aone gulped in disbelief. If you had any more sex appeal, Y/N……….. he wanted to tell you. I’d be an absolute dead man. He already was. 

You took Mountain Man’s silence as confusion. “Do you not get what I’m saying? Here, I’m thinking something like this.”

And then, if things weren’t bad enough, you showed this poor poor hanging-on-by-a-single-thread-of-composure Aone—the move that you’re referring to in slow motion so that he could recognize it in the dance: 

Takanobu was going to lose his mind. Inside, he was all:

And he couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that he has what you just did on film.

 Aone’s dick throbbed relentlessly in his uniform pants, practically having a pounding heart attack of its own. Luckily, it was hidden under his jacket, telling him loud and clear that this was all he could handle from under there. 

“Umm,” Aone started shakily, turning his back to you and scanning the field. He thanked the heavens because he saw the girls entire soccer team starting practice really close to where they were filming, so if anything were to happen and those boys came back to bother you, you could just walk right over to the big group and the coaches. He wouldn’t be gone long anyway.

Not with how worked up he was. 

Not even remembering what excuse he made because all of his brain blood resided in his cock right now, whether he said he needed to go to the bathroom or fucking Pluto he doesn’t know—but he finds comfort in the fact that whatever he said, you responded unsuspectingly, saying, 

“Oh Okay, sure! I needed a break anyway!” you plopped down on the grass in fatigue. 

Good.

Everything in Aone’s mind was a blur until he was inside one of the stalls in the empty boys volleyball locker room, his right hand down his pants before he could even think to unbutton or pull down a zipper, stroking his needy length. 

“Ohhhh my God,” Aone sighed, using the immense amount of pre cum on his dick as lubrication. His dick was twitching in his palm as he stroked. 

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck,”  chanted the middle blocker who does NOT use profanity regularly, shutting his eyes as tight as they could go. Immediately, images of you met the inside of his dark lids, especially this image: over and over and over.

So horny he wasnt even thinking clearly, Mountain Man immediately reached for his camera hanging on a necklace around his neck with one large hand. He immediately scrolled to the dance footage and moaned when your beautiful face and figure met the screen. He stroked himself through the dance you just did that wasn’t even the official dance yet, lidded eyes staring at your pretty face and amazing body in that fucking uniform. A hand job has never felt so knee-buckling.

He replayed the footage.

She’s so hot. Stroke harder. Rewind. Replay. She’s so fucking hot. Stroke faster. Rewind. Replay. She’s so UNBELIEVABLY fucking hottttttttttt. Fuck my hand. Replay, replay, replay. 

Within 50 seconds of starting, Aone was releasing so hard into his hand that he was grateful the camera was around his neck because the force of his orgasm made it slip out of this hand.

Breathing heavily as if he had just run a fucking marathon, it was only one more minute later that Aone felt himself hardening again, thinking of you and needing another release. Home. His dick chanted. He needed to go home. Takanobu was so horny for you that he guiltily fantasized about taking the bra you left at his house all that time ago out so that he could paint it white and possibly fuck it, but he somehow thought that was disrespectful and felt a little ashamed for thinking of you so inappropriately while looking at your footage, so he decided not to do that again. Mountain Man cleaned up with a napkin, but didn’t move to leave just yet. He knew himself better than that, so he wrapped his hand around his pre cum lubed cock again, just waiting.

He loved you for so much more than just your physical appearance—Aone knew that—but sometimes how hot you were put him through a loop. Clearly, considering he’d just jerked himself off in his locker room in 55 seconds and was ready to do it again. Unbelievable. You are breathtakingly beautiful.

I can’t believe Y/N….. gave me a chance— What could the most beautiful woman in the world have seen in me? What am I doing trying to get her back, have I SEEN HER? As Aone was greeted with his self-deprecating thoughts again, he thought about your gorgeous face. This made Takanobu began thrusting up into his wet hand impatiently. 

She’s so caring. And so loving. And such a force to be reckoned with, God I want to put a ring on her finger and cherish her forever.

Even his self deprecating thoughts couldn’t take him out of how far gone he already was, he almost forgot that he actually had to take off his pants unless he wanted to ruin them completely and chance you seeing him walk back out with a giant cum stain. 

With an upsetting growl because his pleasure had to wait a millisecond, Aone roughly unbuttoned, unzipped, and shoved down his pants and boxers, moving so that when he came it would aim where he wanted it to down the toilet. His hand found his aching cock again and he resumed pumping, Aone squeezing at the base and tip and fucking his own fist. He felt just as worked up as the time you relentlessly teased him while studying, but this time you hadn’t even touched him once. He couldn’t believe it. 

But then, well, he remembered it was you, so he could. 

He loved you for years without you even knowing his name, so logically he knows that seeing you bend and bounce and do the splits in a small cheerleading uniform can easily make him cum in his pants unprovoked.

I want to make love to her soooo badly, Aone thought, feeling a little guilty for thinking of his ex so lewdly. I’d stick my cock so deep inside her unmatched pussy and hear her moan my name so loud until she was having one of her hard shuddering orgasms around me that Aone always managed to give that made his thrusts stutter, fuck fuck fuck. Aone thought about moving those tiny shorts that are connected to your skirt aside and pounding into your tight hole, pinching your nipples and sucking a hickey on your sweet skin. Ugh, he was practically pounding into his first now. It almost hurt, but hurt in a good way. He needed this. There is absolutely no better feeling in the world than being inside you, so he tried to remember it and pretend that’s what he was doing to the best of his ability to throw himself over the edge faster. It worked. His entire body trembled.

Aone bit his juicy bottom lip, actively keeping growls in his chest because he felt so carnal. He wanted you soooooooooo bad, and if you two were still together right now and you verbally agreed, thrice—you’d be in this stall with him, your legs wrapped around his waist as he,— oh god, just the mere flash-thought of you in here with him made Aone thrust into his hand even harder, thinking about your perfect ass under that small yellow skirt, how perfect your tits would look when you freed them out from under that constricting small cheer top (but kept the skirt on), and he thought about how wrecked you’d look because you both knew such a big guy like Aone would need at least three or four rounds until he was sated and you were always so fucking willing for him—

Aone let out a growl he’d been holding in as he immersed himself in the dreams, thinking about how fuck-hot you are when you dance, how amazing your breath sounds when its short and calling his name, the look of that chest squeeze and peek-a-boo’s you practically killed him with out there—and not before long Mountain Man was subject to an array of pleasure zaps shooting from his groin up his spine, making Aone close his mouth and let out a pretty loud “MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM..” As he shot cum after cum, spritz after spritz, into the toilet. His second orgasm was so intense that he needed to grab the top of the stall wall next to him with his clean hand to keep himself upright, because his knees were shaking.

Trying to catch his breath and calm down, Aone stayed in the bathroom for a few minutes until his heart beat regulated somewhat. Even though it felt like forever, it had only been maybe 5 minutes since he’d left you on the field chilling. Not enough time for you to even believe that he was pleasuring himself. It couldn’t have been enough time. 

Takanobu cleaned up in a hurry—washing his hands four times before returning to you, feeling a little bit lighter—but not enough to say he is satisfied. Considering the fact that he didn’t have sex, Mountain Man would need a few more rounds with his hand to be satisfied. Mountain Man is a big guy and even though he is the kindest person on earth and thinks about buying you flowers and holding your hand, when he’s horny he needs a lot to satiate that hunger. 

***

Aone returned to you only 6 minutes after he left, and right away you made his dick semi-hard again, looking so beautiful when you accepted his apology.

“Don’t worry about it, Aone. If I haven’t said it enough.... I really appreciate your help. Is there anything I can do to repay you?” 

Takanobu bit back a groan because yes, there was a lot you could do to repay him. Starting with giving him one more chance..... but he couldn’t ask that of you. In any case, he knew what the answer would be right now. 

“No, I’d like nothing in return. I am glad I could help a friend, Y/N.” he offered you a slight smile that made you feel all fuzzy inside. 

You wanted to melt, he is so sweet, even after you shattered his heart. Your heart was swelling and you couldn’t wait to leave him, just so that you could go home to cry your eyes out for the man you let go of. 

“We should finish. It’s getting late.” You collected your emotions and shook out your limbs to prepare yourself for the last section of your tryout video. 

***

You performed the dance section even sexier than Aone could’ve imagined, and it made Mountain Man absolute putty. Due to the events that took place in the locker room not too long ago, Aone was able to get past his horny mind numb to recognize that his heart was exploding for you—for other reasons. His heart was bursting due to pride.

He was so proud of you. 

You weren’t his girlfriend anymore, but you were still an absolute inspiration to him in that you always chased your dreams. Here he was, giving up volleyball, and here you are—killing your own audition in an uncomfortable costume. Wow. Aone would be sure to edit the most amazing tryout video for you to the best of his ability so that the team would be absolute fools not to give you a scholarship. If you didn’t get it, he’d find some weird way of secretly paying for your schooling anyway, if it came down to it. He loved you that much. But he just knew you’d make it. 

When the last take was filmed and all was said and done, Aone was both positively enamoured and positively hard, of course. You looked beyond sexy and flushed, and when he gave you his water and you drank it, some droplet missed your mouth, skidding down your cheek and disappearing into your cleavage. Mountain Man just about needed to run back to the bathroom at that point, but it was time to go home anyway.  

You changed and Kusa picked you up, waving to Aone and thanking him with a hug before leaving. 

Aone sat in his car for 5 minutes once you left, his eyes closed and his head resting on the headrest, just trying to figure out how he would live with these feelings. He didn’t know if he could. A million questions jumped to the forefront of his mind: 

How could someone be so beautiful, so perfect in every way to him? 

What did you even see in him the first time? 

Is it even worth it to try again? 

What happens if his plan fails? 

What would he do?

And, because his dick wanted to throw in a question as well: How fucking amazing did you look today? 

Is it even possible to be this attracted to someone? Fuck. 

Aone’s dick twitched in his pants as thoughts of your pretty smile while you cheered tonight filled his mind, alerting him once more that he has suffered through enough for a lifetime and he needs release again. 

Aone raced home after that, unable to get your brilliant laugh and your perfect ass in that skirt out of his mind the entire time. 

He’s a mess. 

An aroused, lovesick, unmistakably heartbroken mess.

———————————

Taglist: @galagcica @chaichai-the-weeb @nairobiisqueen @bisasterrr @juminly @simply-not-the-same @marvelousbakugou @qyuanon

Outtake #18: CLICK HERE!

[emachinescat]

Wind + Water - Tree in the Road

A MacGyver Fan-Fiction

by @emachinescat

@febuwhump day 12 / alt. 5 - hostage situation

Summary: AU of 2x21.  The bank robbers make their escape with Mac, but this time there isn’t a tree in the road to slow them down.  The rest of the team arrive at the marina just in time to see the robbers procuring a boat - and they have every intention of taking their hostage with them.

Characters: Mac, Jack, Riley, Bozer, Matty, the robbers from 2x21 (apparently their names are Booth, Pike, Dean and Ash)

Words: 4,129

Note: The Spanish is a mixture of my own adventure learning the language (I’m getting there) and a more advanced translator than Google.  Hopefully there aren’t any mistakes, if so - I apologize to any Spanish speakers.

Keep reading here, or on AO3!

If you enjoy, please consider liking, commenting, or re-blogging, and you can follow me for more content like this! :)

“So, for the record, this wasn’t part of the deal,” Angus MacGyver informed his captors testily as he carefully steered the stolen Chevrolet down the narrow, debris strewn backroad toward San Juan Marina and Boat Rentals.  Even though his eyes were on the road, he kept the gun pointed at him in his peripheral vision.  He felt the eyes of the four bank robbers on him, so he continued, very aware that no appeal to logic or conscience that he made at this point would have any effect, largely because these men had depleted stores of both.  Plus, they were desperate.  “I said I’d get you out with the money if you left all the hostages behind,” he continued, then added pointedly, “All including me.”  

One of the three robbers in the backseat, Pike, leaned forward to give their hostage a hearty slap on the back, which sent waves of agony shooting through his battered body.  Mac’s sides, stomach, and back felt every kick and weighted punch, and his mouth tasted like blood.  “Guess you shoulda been more specific,” he taunted, and Mac glanced back long enough to see the amusement on the man’s face.

“Honestly,” said the leader – his followers had called him Booth – “After giving us a glimpse of what you’re capable of, you really think we’d just let you go?”  His tone made it clear that it wouldn’t have mattered if Mac had drawn out and made them sign an extensive contract expressly stating that he was to be left behind with the other hostages, nothing about his predicament would have changed.  He’d gotten them out of a seemingly impossible situation, he’d made himself a valuable asset, and if there was one thing Mac understood about desperate people, it was that once they had something they saw as an advantage, they would never let it go.

The realization left a distinctly sour feeling in Mac’s stomach. He’d been seen and used as a tool before – in the army, he was a bomb defuser; for Phoenix, he was a kind of real-life troubleshooter.  But even in the army, he’d still been a person whose life mattered.  And now, he knew he was valued for so much more than just his skill set by his friends.  

Here, though, with these four men who looked at him with a kind of contemptuous greed in their eyes, he was nothing but a tool, something to be used to their advantage, over and over, until his usefulness had run out, and then he would be discarded like a broken drill bit.  To Booth, Pike, and the others, Mac was less than human, and it made him feel dirty and used and caused his chest to tighten anxiously despite his cool demeanor.  He knew he had to find a way to get away, and soon.  Otherwise, one of two equally unfortunate things was going to happen to him: Either he would be used to bargain their way off the island and then, as soon as they were safely away, he’d be shot and tossed overboard, or they would decide to keep and use him, and his life would become a living hell.  Neither option was a possibility that Mac was willing to entertain, so he would keep his eyes out for the first chance of escape.  

Noting once again the scattering of wreckage in and lining the road, Mac found himself hoping for a large piece of debris – perhaps a fallen tree or power line – would end up in their path.  If they ended up having to get out of the car for any reason, that might give him the chance to plan an escape.  Until then, with the five of them in such close quarters, with all but Mac armed, it was too risky to try anything.  He’d wait for his opportunity, and then make his move.

***

Mac’s opportunity for escape never came, and as he reluctantly directed the vehicle into the marina, the knot it his stomach had imploded into a cavernous pit.  Real tendrils of fear radiated through him, and a furious sense of injustice made his knuckles white and his fingers cramp from the grip he maintained on the steering wheel.  Normally when he was out in the field and in a risky situation, he’d end up finding what he needed to make an escape or at the very least to put a significant hitch in the bad guy’s plan.  It was something he’d come to take for granted, he realized, this bit of luck, that he always had something to work with.  This time, he hadn’t been asking for much – just a piece of debris, a block in the road, on an island ravaged by a natural disaster!  Something should have stood in their way.  The statistical probability of the road being blocked at some point in the twenty-minute drive – especially considering the situation in Puerto Rico – was incredibly high.  He’d counted on that blockage.

And while there had been a couple of branches scattered in their path, none were large enough to hold them up for long at all, and at no point had Mac been allowed out of the car.  In the back of his mind, he remembered what Matty had said to him when she had first taken over.  She didn’t want to be there when Mac’s luck ran out.  He’d been quick to assure her that it wasn’t luck, that he was good at what he did, but now he had his doubts.  If he wasn’t given anything to work with at all, how was he supposed to do what he was so good at?

Still, Angus MacGyver had never been one to give up, and he continued to keep his eyes peeled for anything at all he might be able to use to his advantage.  Even if he couldn’t escape here and now, he would find a way to survive and get back to his friends.  He always did.  

“Stop here.”

Mac did as he was told, putting the car in park and waiting for further instructions.  The gun was still trained on him, and he knew that none of his other captors would hesitate to put a bullet in him from behind if he made one move they didn’t like.  “Dean, grab the kid,” Booth snapped, and the youngest of the robbers, the one who had been gearing up to kill all of the hostages and who couldn’t be any older than Mac himself, got out of the car, went around to Mac’s door, pulled the hostage out of the seat and shoved him forward.  Mac forced himself not to fight back, because Dean’s gun was now pressed into the small of his back, and his voice was deadly as he ordered, “Move.”

The marina was fairly deserted, which would have been odd any other time, but it was midday and most people were either already out on the water or further inland, helping with cleanup and rebuilding.  The only person in sight was the young woman working boat rentals.  She had an open, kind face with eyes that had seen their fair share of suffering – it was a look Mac had seen in Carlos’s more vulnerable moments, and in the eyes of everyone he’d met while on the island.

“Hola,” she greeted, a bit flustered at the new arrivals.  “¿Te puedo ayudar?”  Mac thought that she probably didn’t see a lot of business nowadays.  Tourists were the ones who rented boats more often than not – the locals usually had their own – and tourism had plummeted since the hurricane.  Mac noticed that the bank robbers had hidden their weapons, other than the one at Mac’s back, and to the girl it must have looked like Mac and Dean were just walking close together, side by side.  Maybe she thought they were a couple.  Mac made sure his face was neutral, not wanting to give anything away and put this poor girl in danger.  If only the marina had been deserted, with no one else in the crosshairs!  

“Do I look like I speak Spanish?” Booth snapped impatiently.  

The girl blinked, eyes wide, taken aback by the rudeness.  “I – I’m sorry,” she stammered in heavily accented English.  Mac’s heart went out to her even as he felt his revulsion for his captors grow.  It literally would have expended the same amount of energy to treat the girl with an ounce of respect.  These men were assholes just because they could be. 

“We need a boat,” Booth ordered briskly.  “Now.”

“Bien – ah, okay.”  She looked scared that her accidental slip was going to get her yelled at again.  “Our skippers are not on site at the moment, and most of our boats are being repaired.  We do have one –”

“We’ll take it,” Booth growled, and the girl flinched back at the harshness of his tone.  Tears forming in her eyes, she glanced around briefly at the other men in the party, her eyes landing on Mac last.  He offered her a sympathetic half-smile, knowing that the girl – Mia, her name tag said – was probably having her worst day on the job yet.  At least she didn’t know the true colors of the difficult customers she was dealing with.  

As if worried Mac was trying to tip Mia off, Dean tightened his grip on Mac’s arm and rammed the barrel of the gun painfully into his back.  Mac didn’t react other than to break eye contact with their hostess, who abruptly got back to her task.  “Do you have a boating license that I can see?”  Her dark eyes plainly showed she was afraid of the answer – afraid of what would happen if they did not have the proper documentation and she had to tell them no.

“I don’t have a damn license,” Booth answered, impatience rising with his voice.  

“Lo siento – I’m sorry, you can’t rent a boat without a skipper if you don’t have a license.”  At the fury on her tormentors’ faces, her eyes darted desperately to Mac, as if she had sensed he wasn’t like the others and would step out and ask his friends to give it a rest.  Not wanting to risk her life, Mac felt guilt rise in him as he pointedly avoided her gaze.  Her voice thick with emotion, she regrouped and offered, “But I can call and have someone here within the hour to take you out.”

Booth lost his temper completely.  Slamming his fist down on the counter, he leaned over the cowering girl and hissed in a deadly tone that brooked no argument, “You will get us a boat now.”  Mia stood frozen in shock, and Booth glanced back over his shoulder at his three men and their hostage.  Collectively, they came to a silent agreement – obviously, the subtle approach wasn’t working, and they were running out of time.  With deft movement, so seamless it could have been rehearsed, Dean let go of Mac’s arm and shoved him into Booth, who twisted his greedy, filthy hand in Mac’s hair for the second time that day.  Mac grunted in pain as his head was yanked back and stilled his instinctive struggling as the sun-warmed barrel of Booth’s gun found the left carotid artery in Mac’s neck.  “If you don’t,” Booth added grimly, “I’m going to kill him right before your eyes.”  

Mia’s eyes darted to Mac’s once more and he saw the barely controlled terror just beneath the surface.  She hesitated, and the gun jabbed deeper into Mac’s neck as the safety clicked off, and Mac fought the urge to squeeze his eyes shut as his heart jumped into overdrive.  “You’ll be scrubbing his blood off this dock for the next year,” Booth promised, “and you’ll never get it off your pretty little hands.”

Mac thought for a terrifying moment that Mia was going to pass out or break down, as she swayed slightly on the spot, but then she steeled herself, an inner strength that Mac was proud to see flowing into her.  She straightened her spine, offered a small, scared smile that was probably meant to be reassuring at Mac, and nodded curtly.  “Okay,” she said in a thin voice, and it barely shook, though her hand did as she reached for a set of keys hanging on the wall behind her.  “Just… don’t hurt him, please.”

As she slowly moved away from the wooden counter and motioned for the men to follow her along the dock to their new vessel, Booth yanked Mac’s head back fiercely and whispered, “I knew you would come in handy in some way,” and then shoved Mac forward, finally releasing his hair – Mac’s scalp ached and his neck had already developed a painful stiffness from being twisted back in such an uncomfortable position. The gun moved to the back of Mac’s head.  The safety remained off.

Everything moved far too quickly after that.  It seemed that no time had passed until Mac was being forced onto the deck of a small craft barely big enough for the five of them.  Mac graciously offered to stay behind, and received a crack to the back of the head with the pistol butt in response.  At some point, one of the robbers – Ash, Mac thought his name was – had stepped in and tied Mac’s hands behind his back with sturdy nautical rope.  Mac hadn’t had a single opportunity to attempt escape throughout the whole process, as not only was Booth’s gun still at the base of his neck, but Pike’s own weapon was on the helpless Mia who stood on the dock, tears streaming down her face as she watched the men prepare to leave with their hostage.  Mac knew that if he even thought about doing something stupid, she would be killed without a second thought.

And then many things happened at once – a battered orange car swerved into the parking lot, the sound of screaming sirens not far behind.  Mac couldn’t help but grin when he saw who jumped out: his team, Riley, Bozer, and Jack – who had death in his eyes.  Mac had seen that look many times before.  Someone had threatened his partner.  Mac didn’t envy Booth and his goons once Jack Wyatt Dalton got his hands on them.

Jack already had his own gun drawn as he raced onto the dock.  His boots thunked hollowly against the boards as he sprinted for the boat, keen sights already on the bastard who had his paws on his kid.

But Booth had all the power here, with Mac in his clutches, and he knew it. And with the innocent civilian being held at gunpoint, he’d doubly covered his ass.  Mac’s hope at seeing his team faltered when he realized that Jack’s being here really didn’t change a thing.  It would just make this so much worse, because Jack would be forced to watch as Mac was taken, and when he could finally chase after them, it would probably be too late.  As if to solidify this knowledge, Mac felt Booth’s hand twine in his hair, again – what was it with this guy and Mac’s hair, anyway? – and the gun was back beneath his jaw, Mac could feel the artery rapidly pulsing against the unyielding metal.

“You make one more step, and Boy Wonder here dies,” Booth shouted right in Mac’s ear.  Mac locked eyes with Jack, who stuttered obediently to a stop, Riley and Bozer following suit.  Even now, Mac knew that his partner was desperately searching for any opening, any shot he could take to save his friend.

“I’d put that gun down, if I were you,” Ash called out.

Jack glared at him, unrelenting.  “Who invited Papa Smurf to the party?” he joked, but Mac clearly saw the anxiety in every line on his face.  

A shot rang out.  Mia screamed.  A smoking hole had appeared inches from her feet: The bullet had buried itself into the planks.  “He said,” Booth repeated, “put down your gun.”  He punctuated his words with a brutal yank of Mac’s hair.  “Next time, I put a bullet in your friend. No more warnings.”

Loathing poured off of Jack in waves, but he did as he was told and lowered the weapon, though he didn’t put it down.  The sirens drew nearer, and Mac knew his captors were going to have to make their move before the police arrived, or things would get even messier.  “Ash, start the damn boat,” Booth ordered.  

The man did as he was told, inserting the key, and the engine spluttered, coughed, and fell silent.  He tried again.  Nothing.

“What the hell, man?” Dean barked, an edge of panic creeping into his voice.  

“I’m trying!” Ash shot back, making another attempt to start the motor.  

For a split second, Mac felt Booth twist behind him, trying to get a look at what was going on, and in that moment, Pike was distracted as well.  Just one look away from their hostages was all that Mac and Jack needed – maybe the universe was looking out for them, after all.  While Booth was distracted, both his grip on Mac and on the gun momentarily slackened, and Mac inched over and made himself as small as possible to give Jack a better shot at the man behind him.  The gun was far too close to his face for Mac to lash out himself; now was a time to stand aside and let Jack do what he did best.

In the span of five seconds, Jack brought his gun back up and shot both Pike and Booth in quick succession.  He hit Pike first in the gun hand, and the man toppled over the side of the boat, howling in agony.  Booth’s bullet too had been perfectly timed and aimed – it hit him in the side of the head as he turned back around to deal with his hostage.  He dropped, the gun clattering from his hand, dead before he hit the ground.  It had been a tight shot, and quite the gamble considering the gun that had still been at Mac’s throat, but Jack had timed it perfectly, and Mac never doubted him once. 

***

The next half hour was a blur of police sirens – “‘Bout time you got here,” Jack griped testily – painful but welcome hugs from his friends, and a collective promise of painkillers, a four-way lecture, a hasty debrief, and much-needed rest, in that exact order, on their flight to their next op.  

Jack had been livid, insisting that Mac needed more than on-the-go treatment, but Matty was firm – this op couldn’t wait.  Her fierce eyes did soften when she got a good look at the state that her agent was in, though, and assured him that he was getting a thorough check by medical the second they got home.  Until then, she ordered, with no room for argument, he was to rest and recuperate, and so help her God, if he purposefully threw himself into this kind of mess again.... She didn’t actually finish her threat, which made it all the scarier, and Mac had promised to be good on the next mission.  (Nobody really believed him, though.)

Secretly, though, he was glad that he would get a chance to rest on the flight, because every single bruise, cut, ache, and pain called out, vying for his attention.  A cursory check by Jack and a frazzled EMT revealed that though no ribs were broken, he had severe bruising along his back, sides, and torso.  Booth had chipped a tooth when he’d kicked Mac in the mouth, and Mac did not look forward to spending some quality time with the dentist when he got home.  And there was a nasty, bloody welt on the back of his head from where he’d been pistol-whipped.  

Added to that, his entire body, from his scalp to the tips of his toes ached with a bone-deep weariness that came from the physical abuse and stress of his time as a hostage.  As Jack had reminded him on more than one occasion when Mac had tried to brush similar experiences off, just because it wasn’t his first rodeo, it didn’t make it any less traumatic for his mind or his body – he was still human, after all.  Now, Mac found himself reluctantly agreeing – emotionally, mentally, and physically, he felt in that moment every single thing that had been done to him from the second he’d snuck into that bank.

As usual, though, Mac filed away everything he was feeling to deal with – or even more appealingly, to not deal with – later.  

While Matty finalized the details of their flight, Mac tied up a few loose ends of his own.  First, he called Carlos and spoke to him for a few moments, reassuring his friend that he was really okay and getting the same reassurances in return.  Mac wanted to see Carlos and his family one more time before they took off, but Carlos was just now being released from the hospital, and the Phoenix team was on a very tight schedule.  He did promise to come back and visit soon, and was able to reveal the exciting news that Matty was sending another team in their place, to continue to help with rebuilding.

Next, Mac made his way over to Mia, who was sitting on the edge of an ambulance, her sandaled feet dangling off the side and a bottle of water cradled in her hands.  “Hola,” Mac greeted, and she offered him a small smile.  Mac realized that she was even younger than he’d thought – she couldn’t be more than eighteen or nineteen years old.  “I’m, uh, really sorry about everything,” he stammered, feeling that his words were thoroughly inadequate.

“You have nothing to apologize for!” she exclaimed, dark eyebrows furrowing over kind hazel eyes.  

Mac didn’t agree – as always, that incessant feeling that he could have done more reared its ugly head – but he changed the subject anyway, because Riley and Bozer were approaching, and he knew his time was running short.  “Quiero darte las gracias.” It was important to him that he thanked her in her own language, after the way Booth had treated it.  She deserved better.

She tilted her head, dark brown ponytail swinging with the motion, but a soft smile touched her lips at his fluent but accented Spanish.  “¿Para qué?”

Unable to call the exact words to mind in Spanish, courtesy, he knew, of the light concussion he almost certainly had, he switched back to English apologetically, but Mia didn’t seem to mind at all.  “That was a risky play,” he admitted, “giving them the keys to a boat that didn’t work.  But it was brilliant – and it bought my friend enough time to take control of the situation.  Great job thinking ahead.  You saved my life.”

A brilliant blush colored her cheeks at Mac’s praise.

***

Twenty minutes and a couple of painkillers later, Mac found himself curled up in his seat on the Phoenix jet waiting for the inevitable lecture to start.  He know it had been a stupid and dangerous risk, sneaking into the bank and making himself a hostage.  But he knew that his actions had saved lives, and he would make the same choice if anything like it happened again. 

Jack dropped down into the seat beside him.  “You look like hell, brother,” he observed.  Jack Dalton didn’t sugar coat anything.

“Yeah, well,” Mac admitted, too tired to put up his normal unaffected front.  “Feel like it too.”

The lines around Jack’s eyes deepened.  “The kids are already settling in for the flight,” he said.  “Get some sleep?”

“I thought you guys had a lecture all primed and ready,” Mac muttered, already feeling his eyelids dragging themselves down.  He was exhausted, from everything he’d been through, the pain, and the drugs.  

“Aaah,” Jack waved his hand dismissively.  “What’s the point of lecturin’ you if you’re too strung out to actually hear what we’re trying to drill into that big brain of yours?”

Mac quirked a half-smile.  “Or you could just skip the lecture all together.  You know that you would’ve done the exact same thing in my shoes.”

Jack shrugged.  “Maybe, but tryin’ to get you to look after yourself has become a kind of bonding thing for the rest of us.  And it’s fun seeing you squirm.”

Mac groaned.  “You know I never listen.”

A long-suffering sigh.  “And that’s why my hair’s going gray, hoss.”

Letting his eyes fall shut, Mac couldn’t help but squeeze in one last, murmured jab.  “No, it’s definitely an age thing.”

Mac didn’t hear Jack’s indigent retort, or the quiet cackling of Riley and Bozer from the seats behind.  

He was already asleep.

[prorevenge]

Manipulative Power hungry Aunt torments my family for years. Costs her $300000

Dealt with my shitty manipulative abusive Aunt all my life, finally got revenge.

Players: Myself (M late 30s), Sister (3 year younger), Aunt (Older "Sister" to my Mother), Mother (Single Mom, adopted, no blood relation to my Aunt). Cousins (3 total, 1M, 2F. I have good relationships with them now, mostly).

My estranged father who had been living several counties over, is pretty much out of the picture by the time my parents got their divorce when I was 9. Due to financial hardship, we were forced to live with my Aunt and the nightmare of a household we would soon find ourselves in. My Aunt married into Georgia "Wealth" and you can figure out what that means on your own. She had 3 kids and eventually caught her husband having an affair. It's a huge scandal, she gets the house, the kids and a fat payout from the family attorney. This is important because my Aunt didn't do a damn thing in her life to earn her money, her house, her lifestyle or basically anything. She was born poor along with my Mom.

Under her household, she was drunk with power. Years of therapy have allowed me to recognize that certain people when in a position of power, get a perverse pleasure in ordering others to do their bidding. She was the strictest of authoritarians in every possible way you could imagine. Chores had to be completed by an exact specific time. Vacuuming by 3:45pm, Dishes by 3:55pm, Laundry days for my Mother us kids were Tues/Thurs 5:35pm-7:55pm. If it was still running, she would shut the power off for the two units. As we grew older, her own kids opted to stay with their father for full time custody and she had them on Weekends. Even they couldn't stand her when she was in charge and in the house. As time passed, she got them less and less opting for alternating weekends as Highschool activities took precedence over time with Mother.

For my sister and I, the large 6 bedroom house was not ours for the taking. My mom had to pay rent as well as rent for 1 bedroom as that was all she could afford on her salary. We had to share a bedroom until my second year of HS. All the while there was 1 spare unused bedroom available at all times. My Aunt needed this for "Guests" when they stayed over. Not one guest stayed there in the 10 years I was under that roof. Finally the church we attended told my Aunt to give up the spare bedroom so my sister can have her own room as it was "unhealthy" for two teenagers sharing a room together like that. That infuriated my Aunt because someone told her what to do in her own household. My sister and I got the brunt of her wrath. As my Mom's salary was tapped out, my sister and I had do extra chores like mowing the lawn, trimming the shrubs, cleaning the pool which we could no longer use without her being outside watching us.

My Aunt's behavior was becoming more and more outrageous and disconnected from society. For example, she had always snapped her fingers when she wanted to get someones attention, but it was getting far more frequent and she would blow up into a tirade if either my sister and I didn't obey. Her own kids tried repeatedly to tell her that the shit she was doing was wrong but she wouldn't listen.Eventually they wanted nothing to do with her outside of the home. She was a tyrant there and repeated intervention to get her to see the folly of her ways would fall on deaf ears.

I Snapped:

All through HS I had no confidence as a person. I was weak willed and growing ever distant from friends and society. I say this in all truthfulness and fear, that had circumstances continued the way they had been going, I could very well had taken a gun to myself or worse, to others around me. I was that bad off.

I had just graduated HS and started my first semester of community college. I'm 2 weeks into my classes attending from home when my Aunt drops a bomb on me. "You owe me $$$ for this months rent, the same amount for next months rent as well. It is the 27th after all. You're an Adult now. You're out of HS and working now, so you need to pay rent" The fuck? I blew a fucking gasket as I yelled back. "You can't just suddenly decide to charge me rent just because you feel like it. I need 30 days notice, I have rights".

My Aunt yelled at me some bullshit excuse that she had discussed this with my mother and it was decided that I needed to pay my own rent now. In some miraculous backbone move, of which I still have no idea how I stood up to her, I yelled right back at her, "If I'm an Adult, then treat me like and talk to me about rental agreements. I'll start paying you rent in 30 days starting the 1st." I turned my back to her and walked away with my fists balled tight. I was furious with anger but I walked away. My Aunt saw my fists from behind and screamed bloody murder that I was going to attack her. No, I wasn't. She snapped her fingers at me repeatedly on my tail to get my attention but I didn't turn around. I needed to cool off and clear my head. As I turned the corner, she grabbed my wrist hard yelling "I'm not finished talking to you". I threw my still balled up fist forward keeping with my stride to break her grip as I hadn't stopped my momentum. This caused her grabbing arm to slam hard into the corner of the wall that I had just turned into. She screamed in pain but I left the house and took off.

The aftermath of that incident was that my Aunt called the cops on me in an attempt to press charges. She was taken to the hospital and suffered a fractured wrist and she was put in a cast/sling (don't know as I never saw it and never inquired further). Her story changed every time she told the cops what happened while my story was spot on every time. I can still recall that moment down to the smell in the house, where I was facing, the working and non-working lightbulbs etc. Forever ingrained in me. I was kicked out of the house and I couldn't visit my sister or my Mom there at the house again. Fine by me as I didn't want to see my bitch Aunt ever again. I was happy to meet my Mother and sister at the local diner or outlet. We could be ourselves there and not hostages in our own home.

Years Later:

My Mom wised up and got out of that abusive relationship with her sister and moved out on her own. She got a temporary nice place, invested wisely and with the help from the church, got help getting a place of her own. In 2009 after the housing crisis, she bought her own place that she could never have afforded on her own prior the Market crash. But some good came out of it. She wept knowing my Sister (and her family) and myself can come visit any time and stay.

Over the years I've been able to forgive my Aunt. Not forget, Forgive. I've let go a lot of my anger and hatred toward her that she put me through. When she has no leverage or control over us, she's a somewhat decent person for being a total bitch of a person. My Cousin's have calmed down, heard my side of what happened those years ago and know what kind of person I am compared to what kind of person their Mother is. They chose to believe me and know I didn't hit her or strike her or beat her across the face like she continues to claim.

The Revenge:

While I have been able to forgive my Aunt for what she has done to me, I cannot forgive her for what she did to my Mother. Kept her in financial hardship for a decade while she sat on a bank account full of cash and assets. Or what she did to my Sister. Forced her to pay for damages because the water heater burst while my Aunt and Mother was away one weekend leaving my sister at home. She didn't discover the flooded rooms for hours. My Aunt's reasoning, "It was her responsibility to watch the house." Not the responsibility of the home owner to maintain/replace the water heater before it goes. Lets leave that Upfront $5000 financial burden before the Flood insurance kicks in on a 16 year old girl.

I've had little to no contact with my Aunt since I was kicked out of the house nearly 2 decades ago. But I do keep in constant contact with my cousins. While I'm not going to divulge what I do for a living, I can say that I work with and for the Government. I've worked my ass off getting to where I'm at today. I'm known for being truthful, wise and giving good advise when asked. Because of this, I often talk financially with my cousins. All of whom are money-smart and are doing well for themselves. They often then relay this information to their scheming mother who has no mind for business and investments. All that money she got from her house sale, her divorce settlement, her previous investments is pretty much gone. I spent YEARS planning on the perfect trap and it took a long time to prepare everything to make sure everything appeared right.

IANAL and I don't pretend to know the law but I do know the regulations and laws pertaining to insider information. This is not that. 100% certain of it and if I ever go to court, I know my lawyer has a solid case in my defense. But is this a grey area, most definitely. I let slip to my Cousins about some future real estate plans near my Aunt's new area of living. It "may" be worth a lot more because of future development taking place in the area. All of that was true and backed up by what was in the News paper and New Construction signs that newly appeared on Google Maps (at the time). The rest was fabricated by myself backed up by actual information I looked up on real estate websites and on projects I was working on through my work.

The Telephone game takes place and a few weeks later I presume, my Aunt starts making phone calls to real estate agents trying to buy lots of Land in the undeveloped shitty area of her new house. Over the course of a few months to a half a year, she spends $300,000 of her last remaining savings on land hoping it will pay out when the area around it gets developed in the upcoming years.

Only, HUD/Government/City doesn't have any plans to develop in those immediate areas. In fact, analysis showed that building in those areas was poor planning and would cost the tax payers twice to three times as much as the land was not environmentally sound. It was best to build 6 miles away.

This post was long overdue because it's been over 2 years since my Aunt purchased Land that is basically worthless. See, she won't sell the land unless she gets at least the same price she paid for it because she's the OWNER of that land. Can't tell her what to do on her own land. Sweet Karma strikes in a way I couldn't possibly have foreseen. My cousin informed me that the value of the land has decreased significantly because it's not environmentally sound to build anything commercial there. But it's zoned for commercial use. Currently 3 of the 4 blocks of land she purchased are just weed farms next to eye sore abandoned buildings or industrial complexes. Nobody can build on it and nor does anyone want to buy it. Sucks to be her!

Best part is, my cousins have absolutely no idea that I set them up for their Mother to take the fall. These environmental results are relatively new and the perfect cover to say why the Project changed locations 6 miles away.

TL:DR Abusive Aunt torments my family and myself for a decade and more. Decades later, I am in a position to trick her buying worthless land. Icing on the cake, that land can't be used for it's intended purpose and has devalued significantly.

(source) story by (/u/Limecherrry)

[d3-iseefire]

Little Swan Lost Chapter 38

When Dis said she wanted to see how much of Thorin’s money they could spend, she wasn’t joking. Bilba had thought what she spent before leaving Shire was a lot, but quickly realized it was a mere pittance in comparison to what Dis cheerfully spent. 

She’d expected them to go to the main Erebor mall, located near the center of the city. Back in Shire she’d often enjoyed spending a lazy afternoon at the mall, window shopping, grabbing a bite to eat or watching a movie at the theater. Here, the closest she’d gotten to the mall had been a few glimpses of it, both in person and in searches online during times when she’d been feeling particularly lonely or nostalgic.

Part of her had been excited about getting a small taste of what life used to be like but, really, she should have realized that it was never going to be that way again.

The Durins, as it turned out, did not shop at the regular mall.

The mall they went to, instead, wasn’t even on the main island. It was on one of the minor ones behind the main island. There was a second mall there, several stories high and covering nearly all the landmass of the small, rocky spit of land it sat on. It was, Dis explained, where the wealthy of Erebor tended to shop along with their sizable security entourages. The public were welcome to visit the mall but did so with the understanding that there would most likely be a background check run on them the moment they stepped foot through the door.

Back in Shire, with Rosie and Bofur, Bilba would have spent her time leisurely walking through the mall. Dis, in contrast, approached shopping the way Bilba imagined a general might approach a war. She had memorized the layout of the mall and knew the most efficient way to hit every store she deemed essential.

She deemed a lot of stores essential, as it turned out.

For Bilba, it became a whirlwind she could barely keep up with. They’d enter a store and immediately be surrounded by the employees, all eager to help Erebor’s princess. Dis would start talking and then, without warning, Bilba would find herself being measured and poked and prodded and fitted for all manner of things. Shirts, pants, skirts, dresses, and lavish gowns, all in various levels of formal and informal.

“Clothing is important,” Dis explained, as she casually rejected one dress for another without any reasoning Bilba could see. “Too formal and you risk elevating someone to a station they have no business at. Too informal, and you risk offending an ally. We’re judged in everything we do, down to the shoes we choose to wear or the jewelry we don’t. It all sends a message, whether we like it or not.” She paused suddenly, eyes staring off blankly into the distance and then, to Bilba’s surprise, shot her a guilty look. “You know what? I’m sorry. I’m sitting here lecturing you like you’re a novice on her first day of training.”

“It’s all right,” Bilba said quietly as she watched a new parade of shoes being brought out from the back of the current store, they were in. Boots, heels, flats, even a few pairs of sandals. After this, Dis planned to hit the jewelry stores to ensure she had the right bracelets, rings, necklaces and hair pieces for various functions. Tiaras would be supplied by the palace. There were apparently at least fifteen of them, all to be worn for, and at, specific functions. “I didn’t actually know most of this.”

Dis and Ori stared at her.

“I’m sorry,” Dis said. “You what now?”

Bilba flushed. “Shire has a large royal family. It wasn’t seen as necessary to train everyone, when only a few ever interacted diplomatically with other families.”

There, that was a good explanation…wasn’t it? Part of her felt like just blurting out the truth. Telling them that she’d basically been a pariah because of her grandfather’s hatred toward her mother. Tell them about the dreaded visits that were more about her grandfather showing off his evil than about training her to be a princess.

Just tell them…everything.

The other part of her, however, shuddered at how her grandfather would react if he found out she’d said anything. Yes, he was in Shire and she was in Erebor but, even so, the mere thought made her blood run cold.

She wasn’t stupid. Reckless, and impulsive sometimes like when she’d allowed a two-year absence from the palace to convince her that she could stand up to her grandfather, but she wasn’t stupid. Foolishly trying to stand up to him was a far, far cry to betraying him. What he could consider a betrayal anyway.

He could reach her in Erebor, of that she had no doubt.

She ran her hands up her arms, suddenly freezing, and forced a weak smile at the two women standing over her.

“Huh,” Dis said after several long moments. She waved a hand absently. “Well, in that case, I’ll keep talking then.”

She did, but seemed distracted, while Ori kept shooting her strange glances that Bilba couldn’t read. She didn’t think she’d given anything away, or said something she shouldn’t, but couldn’t be sure. In any event, it was obvious she’d have needed to say something. She was clearly in the dark about Erebor’s etiquette and, without help, stood an exceptionally good chance of offending just about everyone.

Suddenly, the fact that she’d spent a month in her room didn’t seem like the worst decision ever. In fact, deciding to leave her room was beginning to feel more and more like a bad choice. Since she’d done so she’d almost drowned, gotten Thorin hurt, and had to deal with the Thrain and now her apparent lack of royal training.

They finished with the shoe store and then hit the jewelry ones just as Dis had said. It was only after they’d spent more money than Shire made in a year that Dis announced their next stop would be to get dinner.

At this, Bilba stumbled to a stop in shock. “How long have we been here?” Without thinking, she fumbled for her phone only to remember that, of course, she didn’t have one.

“Oh!” Cerys suddenly stepped forward from where she’d been silently guarding them along with the rest of their sizable security force. “My apologies, Your Highness. I completely forgot.” She pulled a slim phone from a pocket and held it out to Bilba.

Dis made a tsking sound. “Well, that’s boring.” Her eyes narrowed for a second. “There’s a store on the second floor that sells phone accessories. We’ll hit there and then eat.”

“But we’re supposed to eat at the palace,” Bilba stammered, stumbling forward a few steps as Dis began to march off on her newest quest. “The king said—”

Dis spun to face her and, with a sigh, pulled her phone out and dialed. “We’re going to be late,” she said shortly as soon as the call was answered. She paused for a few seconds as the person on the other end responded. “Well, that’s not my fault is it?” She listened for a few more seconds, visibly rolling her eyes and mimicking someone chattering away, before hanging the phone up with a bright smile.

“That…that wasn’t the king, was it?” Bilba asked. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answer.

“He’s annoyed that Thorin is too tied up in meetings to come to dinner,” Dis said absently, focused on her phone as she texted something. She hit a button and then slid the phone back in her pocket. “And now the boys and Frerin won’t be going either.”

“Won’t he be angry?” Bilba couldn’t imagine ever treating her grandfather like that. He probably wouldn’t have killed her, but she had no doubt he’d have made her wish he had.  

“He’ll be fine,” Dis said airily. She hooked her arm through Bilba’s and tugged her in the direction of the escalators. “Eating alone occasionally won’t kill him. Maybe he’ll reflect on his own behavior and stop taking us all for granted.”

“One can hope,” Ori said dryly as she linked her arm through Bilba’s on the other side. “In the meantime, I think Thorin would definitely want Bilba to bling out her phone as much as possible.”

“Oh, definitely,” Dis said cheerfully. She pointed her arm forward as if leading a charge. “Onward, to victory and draining my brother’s bank account.”

***

Much as Bilba had wrongly envisioned what going to the mall for a royal would mean, she soon found she’d been just as wrong about what “getting something to eat” meant.

In Shire, with Rosie and Bofur, it would have meant going to the food court and finding a place, or several places, that looked fun to try. Then they’d search for a relatively clean, and empty, table that, if they were lucky enough, would have enough chairs for all three of them. Eating would be a mishmash of trying to fit all their food on the far too small surface while ignoring just how uncomfortable the chairs were. They’d laugh and talk, voices louder than normal to try and carry over the chatter of other mall goers and the loud music being piped over the speakers.

Here, it meant a high end, exclusive restaurant that took up almost an entire floor of the mall. A snotty looking man at the door held a list of guests who were allowed entry, though he immediately swept aside when he saw Dis approaching. As Bilba passed, he gave her a look that made her feel like a rat following a swan.

It was the first such look she’d gotten while being at the mall that day and served to forcefully remind her just how poorly she was viewed in Erebor. Yet another difference from Shire. There, no one cared one way or the other about her. She’d used to feel sad about it from time to time, but now understood it had been a blessing.

She suppressed a shiver and instinctively moved a step closer to Cerys. She wouldn’t say she entirely trusted the other woman yet, but she was a familiar presence and Bilba could admit to feeling at least some level of safety when around her. An unstable safety to be sure, but safety.

They were led to a dimly lit private room with a thick, maroon carpet, a mahogany table and chairs padded with black leather. The overall effect might have been oppressive were it not for the fact that the walls and ceiling were literally covered in white and green tinged crystal. Lights had somehow been strung up behind them, creating an effect that made it feel like she’d just walked into a geode.

Bilba stumbled to a stop at the sight, staring in awestruck wonder. “Oh, wow. This is gorgeous.”

Dis beamed in pride. “Isn’t it? Ereboreans know how to decorate.”

“They do indeed.” Bilba shook herself out of her stupor and went to her seat. Their guards lined up along the walls and outside the room. Having so many eyes on them felt awkward to Bilba but Dis and Ori seemed oblivious.

As she settled in, Bilba absently set her new phone on the table. It now sported a case featuring inlaid gems that formed spiraling flowers and leaves set in a gold tone background. The case came with a spot to attach a charm, so she’d bought a small cat that reminded her of her feline friend from the beach.

Dis reached over and grabbed the phone. “I’m going to put my number in it, all right?”

Bilba nodded. “Okay. Would you mind putting any other numbers you think I should have? I don’t have any right now.”

“Oh!” Ori sat up straight and clapped her hands together. “Put mine too!”

Dis nodded, eyes focused on the screen. “I’ll put all of ours, and your guards.” She frowned and looked up. “Have you gotten your bracelet yet?”

“Bracelet?” Bilba asked blankly. “What bracelet.”

“We haven’t had a chance to sit down and design it with her, Your Highness,” Cerys broke in from where she stood against the wall. “It’s next on the list.”

Dis nodded absently. She looked back to the phone but raised her other hand and jingled a charm bracelet hanging from her wrist. “We all have custom security bracelets. If you’re ever in an emergency, all you have to do is activate it and you’ll bring down pretty much the entire palace security on you.” She set the phone down and moved one of the charms, a small, linked set of hearts, to reveal an almost invisible indentation. “It’s designed so it can be activated quickly, but not accidentally.”

“Oh.” Bilba started to ask if anyone had ever had to use it, but bit back the question. If the answer were yes it would have been under extreme circumstances and it was likely Dis wouldn’t want to relieve such a thing.

“Are you on Ravenhill?” Dis asked suddenly. “I’m going to send you a request.”

She did something on the phone, and then handed it to Ori who also fiddled with it before handing it back to Bilba. “There, I sent you one too.”

“Thank you.” Bilba carefully took the phone back, unsure of what else to say. To be honest, the entire day had been overwhelming and she was still trying to process everything that had happened. “I’ll send you texts, so you’ll have my number too?” Her voice was shy even to her own ears, and she couldn’t stop the irrational thought that both women would reject her offer in spite of having given her their numbers to begin with.

“Great!” Dis said cheerfully. “Now, the next time my father tries to pull a stunt you can text me and I’ll come help him remove his head from his ass.”

Bilba focused on her phone and didn’t react. She had no intention of doing any such thing. The last thing she wanted to do was have the king see her as some sort of snitch or troublemaker. Not only that, but she didn’t yet know if Dis was the sort to take her father to task only to get angry and protective when someone else did the same.

She pulled up her contact list and was surprised to see the long list of numbers Dis had added. Her own, Thorin’s, Ori’s, Cerys and Gareth, even Frerin who she still hadn’t met and the king, who she planned to never call if she could help it. She also had no intention of ever calling Dwalin or Nori, but could see the reasoning behind having their numbers, as well as Balin. She added Rosie’s, and Arwen’s and made a mental note to find out her steward’s number to add that one as well.

She moved instinctively to add Bofur’s, only to flinch and stop. They’d agreed not to communicate, she reminded herself. Bofur needed to move on, and so did she. She wanted to move on. The sooner she did the sooner it’d stop hurting so much every time she thought about him.

She pulled up her Ravenhill account to accept Dis and Ori’s requests, and was startled to see a third one waiting for her. “Thorin sent me a request.”

“He’d better have,” Dis said. “You are his wife after all.”

Bilba chose to leave that comment alone. She accepted the requests and then, nervously, clicked on Thorin’s profile. Her mood immediately soured at the sight of the name Kyra Lundair next to the newest post at the top of Thorin’s page. It was some meme or another she’d posted, innocent enough on its own, but for the fact that the woman was literally everywhere Bilba went.

It had been posted only an hour earlier, she noted, and already had been liked by Thorin. Thorin who was too tied up in meetings to go to dinner, but not so tied up that he couldn’t like something his ex-fiancée posted on his page.

“What’s wrong?” Ori asked from where she sat next to Dis.

Bilba clicked over to Dis’ profile. “Nothing.” She studied the banner for the page, featuring a younger Dis standing next to an attractive, blonde man. “Is this your husband?” she asked, holding the phone up.

The other woman’s face softened, and she took the phone to smile fondly at the picture. “Yeah, that’s Vili. It’ll be seven years this spring.”

“I’m sorry.” Bilba flinched in guilt, regretting having brought it up.

“It’s fine.” Dis handed the phone back. “We’ll find him. I know we will.”

“I believe you,” Bilba said sincerely. She studied the picture a moment longer, wondering where the smiling young man had gone and why. He looked oddly familiar but, given who he was, it stood to reason she’d seen a picture in passing on the internet or even somewhere in the palace.

The food arrived just after that and she put the phone away as it was set out. They’d never been given menus or ordered but Dis and Ori didn’t seem to think anything of it. A man Dis identified as the owner appeared and began announcing the dishes as they were set out. All of them sounded amazing, and Bilba felt herself growing hungrier with every passing minute.

The man finally stopped talking. He started to excuse himself, before pausing as Dis gestured him forward. He leaned over and, for several long moments, the two had a hushed conversation that Bilba couldn’t hear from her side of the table. Then the man stood, bowed and left, after which they were finally allowed to eat. The food ended up being just as amazing as it looked and Bilba ate more than she probably should in an attempt to try all of it, and then a desire to go back for seconds on her favorites.

“So,” Dis said as she snapped a breadstick in half. “How are things going with you and my brother?”

Bilba froze. “Uh…it’s okay, I guess.”

Dis raised an eyebrow. “You guess?”

“We don’t know each other all that well,” Bilba said, almost under her breath.

“Is that so?” Dis asked idly. She had an odd tone in her voice and Bilba had a sinking feeling she’d given away far more than she intended.

Dis didn’t ask any further questions and the rest of dinner was spent in light chatter, mostly about favorite movies and books and the like.

Once they were finished Dis led them back out into the mall proper. Bilba was relieved to see the man at the door who’d glared at her was no longer there. He must have gone off shift while they ate.

They headed out, the only signs of their mammoth shopping trip the case and charm on Bilba’s phone and the small, carry out box Ori had gotten to bring home to her husband. Everything else would be delivered to the palace later, Dis had explained.

“I hope I have enough room for it all in my wardrobe,” Bilba mused, as they traveled down the escalator toward the first floor. “I probably should have thought about that.”

Dis laughed. “That’s cute.” At Bilba’s look of confusion, her own expression became startled. “Please tell me you didn’t think that wardrobe was all you had to store your clothes in.”

“It’s not?” Bilba said slowly. It was all she had seen, and no one had mentioned anything else. Honestly, the thing was several times larger than what she’d had in Shire and was even larger than the ones she’d seen in Beatrice’s room or any of her other relations.

Dis sighed. “It’ll be too late by the time we get back but remind me to show you where your closet is. Or better yet just keep an eye out when the maids put all your things away. The wardrobe,” she said in answer to Bilba’s unspoken question, “is for your go to, day to day items, or to store an outfit you know you’ll need in the next few days or week or so. It makes it less of a hassle if it’s right there, you know?”

Bilba didn’t but nodded dutifully.  

They exited the mall, and her steps slowed as she realized full night had fallen. They’d literally spent the entire day shopping. Bilba was certainly tired, but, if asked, would have insisted they’d only been out a few hours at most. She cast a guilty look at Cerys and Gareth, wondering if the two had been able to eat or see Wynne, but neither appeared unhappy. Perhaps they’d gone on breaks when she hadn’t been looking? She had spent a lot of time trying things on and being measured, so it was certainly possible.

They all loaded back into the limos and started the long journey back. Bilba must have dozed off because, before she knew it, they were pulling down a low ramp into an underground parking garage behind the palace.

Once they were parked, they all got out and took an elevator to the main foyer of the palace.

“This is where I must leave you,” Dis said as they made their way up the stairs toward the royal levels. “The boys will be waiting for me to tuck them in and read them a story.”

“I need to head off too,” Ori said, holding up the carry out bag. “Dwalin should be off shift by now and I texted him that I was bringing food.”

Bilba nodded. “Thank you, both, for today. I had a really good time.”

As she said the words, she was startled to realize she meant them. She had had a really good time.

“You’re welcome,” Dis said cheerfully. “I’ll see you tomorrow at breakfast, all right?”

Bilba nodded and the other woman left, followed soon after by Ori who impulsively hugged her before skipping off to her own rooms. Most of the security had already dispersed, so Bilba bade Cerys and Gareth goodnight before heading to her own room. She’d hoped by doing so they’d head off to their own rooms and Wynne but they followed her until she’d walked through the doors of the suite before wishing her a goodnight and leaving.

Once the doors were closed, Bilba let out a breath and sagged forward onto the wood for a few minutes. It had been a crazy day from start to finish, but she was happy to have it end on a high note.

She pushed up and noted that, while the room was dark, a light was on in the small kitchen, casting enough of a glow for her to see by. She was pretty sure it had been off when she’d left that morning, which meant Thorin must have come back.

His door was shut and there was no light shining from under it so either he’d come back and left again, or he’d already gone to bed.

Bilba started to go to her own room, only to find herself slowing to a stop before she got there.

Did Thorin know what had happened? About the pregnancy demands, and whatever had gone on with Kyra? She chewed on her lower lip and cast a nervous glance toward Thorin’s door. If he did know, then she imagined she’d have found him waiting for her to come back to discuss it.

That or he was off, even then, comforting Kyra over whatever the king had said to her when he’d summoned her to his office.

Bilba grimaced. Think positive, she told herself firmly. You had a good day today, so don’t ruin it.

Thorin didn’t know, she decided. And if he didn’t, then she’d much rather have him hear it all from her before he heard it from someone else. Get her own side in as much as possible before he heard whatever twisted version she was sure would be making the rounds tomorrow.

She let out a short breath and wrapped her arms around her torso. Telling him herself would be best, which…meant…she’d need to go knock on his door…and wake him up to tell him.

She shuffled forward slowly, until she was standing in front of his door. She raised her hand and curled her fingers into a fist to knock…and then just stood there. Her stomach twisted, and she tried to force herself to breathe normally.

It’s fine, she told herself. It’s totally fine. Just…knock on the door. It’s fine.

She moved her hand forward, only to freeze as another, unwelcome thought came to her.

What if he wasn’t alone?

Her face flamed, and she shook her head. No. Not even Thorin was crazy enough to bring his mistress into his room at night. He’d have had to parade her past his own guards and the news would be all over the palace by the next morning. No way he was that stupid.

Hopefully.

She half lowered her hand, raised it again and then, before she could think about it any further, reached out and rapped sharply on the wood. Immediately her heart jumped into her throat and her muscles locked up.

A light snapped on under the door, and footsteps moved across the floor. A moment later, the door was pulled open and Bilba found herself face to face with Thorin…dressed in nothing but a pair of boxers.

Not…what she’d been expecting.

Not even close.

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