#immuno support

[howgalling]

ARMORED TALI!! as requested hehe. honestly i adore the geth influence in her me1 design. hm. or the way that quarians made the geth look like themselves- it's visible in the armor that tali is wearing. or is tali wearing the armor of geth she's taken out? very fun either way. her fits in 2+3 were cute but imo there was a certain charm to her mass effect 1 design <3 as is my humble duty i bulked up her gear. she's still dinky under it all but I like to think with the resources shepard has access to, she wouln't allow tali on the field without souping her armor way the hell up!!

[strifetime]

.

[fitaminat]

I would recommend "Boost Your Immunity with Sambucol Vitamin C Effervescent Tablets" as the best title because it directly addresses the viewer's need to enhance their immunity, includes the product name, and uses a power word "boost" to grab attention.

[project-sekai-facts]

Prskfacts 2nd anniversary!

Today (March 13th) is the second anniversary of when I started posting trivia! Thank you so much for the support over the last two years, it means a lot and I'm glad people continue to enjoy the blog!

As of today there will be some changes to how this blog is run. Posts will continue to be daily, but most days will be reblogs of old facts instead of new ones (new ones will still be posted sometimes). It has been incredibly hard for me to keep posting daily over the last year and a half and I feel like the quality of trivia has been declining recently as I've been running out of things to post. I don't want that to continue, so I'll be focusing on quality over quantity from now on. Plus, it's been a long time and a lot of people weren't here for the older posts, so they'll be fun to revisit.

I will still be answering asks, but don't expect me to be as regular with this. It will probably continue at the rate it has for the past few months. This is just to give me time to focus on uni and personal life over this blog, which was getting to the point of being like a job for me. I will also be emptying my inbox today because it's got like 800 unanswered asks in it and I need it to be more manageable. Sorry to anyone whose questions I didn't answer, but feel free to send them again (submissions have been put on the queue).

Sorry this is a bit of a downer anniversary post. To reiterate, I'm not fully moving away from prsk or this blog, just reducing my activity. I hope you continue to enjoy prskfacts for the next year!

So in January 2024 I explained what 4kids was to an anon and said this:

and someone said this in the tags:

i decided explaining shadow the hedgehog lore in depth was the funniest way to semi-retire from this blog that wasn't posting "sayonara you weeaboo shits" or posting my shitpost drafts and going radio silent afterwards. so thank you to the person who said that you gave this blog a slightly less unceremonious death. also if ur a new sth fan who got in bc of the movie this might be useful idk i mainly just wanted an excuse to talk about shadow the hedgehog

So 50+ years before the events of peak fiction Sonic Adventure 2, we have Gerald and Maria Robotnik, Eggman's grandfather and cousin respectively. Gerald was a revolutionary scientist/roboticist (and archaeologist, this will be relevant later) and one of the greatest minds of his time, making huge scientific developments with the goal of bringing hope and happiness to humanity. One of his greatest inventions was a space station for scientific research, the Space Colony ARK, which served as his main lab from then on. The construction and operations of the ARK were partially funded by the United Federation (in-universe USA), but primarily funded by GUN (Guardian Units of Nations, the in-universe US military).

So SA2 is an extremely anti-military game. That's going to become apparent from here on out. So, GUN wants weapons in exchange for funding, and they're starting to get annoying about it. Obviously this is not what Gerald wants, so he asks the President of the UF if he can intervene, since the govt is the other source of funding. So the president says he'll do that, but he also sucks and decides to ask Gerald to invent immortality. Gerald hates the idea of this just as much, and shoots it down immediately, not to mention it being an impossible task.

However, back on Earth, Maria gets sick, and is diagnosed with NIDS (neuro-immuno deficiency syndrome (EN) or native immunodeficieny syndrome (JP), either way it's clearly based on AIDS), a terminal illness. Gerald manages to get Maria brought up to the ARK when treatments on Earth are failing so the team up there can do assessments and research treatments. The low gravity on the ARK also helps to keep the illness' effects at a low, for the most part. Maria's family back at Earth isn't exactly happy about all this though (the Robotnik family drama isn't actually too important here I just wanted to talk about it).

So the president keeps pushing for the immortality thing, and Gerald figures he can use this to find a cure for Maria, so decides to go forward with Project: Shadow, named as such because "the concept [of immortality] is as intangible as a shadow". GUN still wants weapons as well, which is where the archaeology thing starts coming into play. So to tie SA2 into its predecessor, there's these robots that look like the god Chaos from SA1. Gerald had researched Chaos in the past, and builds robots based on it to give to GUN.

Okay now we're finally getting closer to actual Shadow stuff. The scientists are using a Chaos Emerald in their research into immortality, and develop Chaos Drives using the Chaos Energy from the emerald. Gerald also supplies GUN with these drives so they can use them as a power source to try and appease them (they still use them 50 years later to power their mechs, GUN robots drop them when destroyed in SA2). The staff test out these drives on a salamander when they feel they're developed enough to be used on living tissue. Some time later, the salamander being used in testing has such rapid cellular growth that it can't survive on its own, and it becomes violent and uncontrollable, prompting Gerald to build it a life support pack and seal it away in the ARK's basement (functionally). This is the Biolizard, the prototype Ultimate Life Form and the final regular boss of SA2 (also one of two characters with a confirmed birthday, that being January 27th).

More Robotnik family drama stuff just bc I feel like mentioning it, you can skip this paragraph. So Maria's been up on the ARK for a while now, enough years that some scientists on the ARK think she was born there, and Gerald isn't making any progress with creating a cure. Some of the scientists are even starting to doubt that Maria is even ill, since her symptoms are invisible most of the time. Also, the rest of the Robotnik family is losing faith in Gerald and it's getting to a point where they want either a cure or for her to be sent home to be with her family. Gerald cannot yet provide a cure, but he also does not want to send Maria home because she will die. See now Gerald has a pretty big ego. He constantly talks about how much of a genius is and has boundless confidence in himself, which only now is being put to the test. He keeps biting off more than he can chew, and it's starting to cost his family.

Here we fucking go. Exactly 50 years prior to the game Shadow the Hegdehog, the Black Comet passes by Earth. This comet it the home of an alien race called the Black Arms, led by this demonic looking alien guy called Black Doom. Gerald makes contact with the comet, and strikes a deal with Doom, who was interested in Gerald's work with the Chaos Emeralds. Black Doom lends his DNA to be used with Project Shadow, and it reacts well with the Chaos energy. See now Doom has this plan to invade Earth next time his comet comes by, and he wants the thing Gerald is making to be able to do that for him essentially. An Ultimate Life Form is pretty appealing when you want to conquer the Earth.

Also fun thing that originates from a 4koma but was brought up for the first time in English in Shadow Generations: Maria is the one who named Shadow. He originally called the project "Project Shadow" out of mockery as mentioned earlier, and also thought the name sounded too dark for the project he was using to help develop a cure to Maria's illness. However Maria said that he should name the hedgehog he created "Shadow", because a shadow shows the way to the light. Maria also designed Shadow's shoes and inhibitor rings to try and reduce the strain his body will be under from the alien DNA and Chaos energy (Gerald's Journal specifically refers to them as mobility and focus aids). Fun fact 3 if you hack the camera during the lab cutscene in Shadow 05 there's multiple failed Shadow prototypes in the room.

So why is Shadow a hedgehog? It's not ever been confirmed, but it is heavily implied that Shadow was based on the Hidden Palace mural from Sonic 3 & Knuckles. This is an ancient prophetic mural that depicts a blue creature glowing gold fighting a robot that has the Master Emerald. It's depicting the true final boss of the game. We know Gerald visited Angel Island and, while it's never mentioned, it's likely that he saw this mural and made Shadow in the blue/gold figure's likeness (which is why Shadow looks like the Adventure-era Super Sonic design specifically).

We're gonna have to go back to the archaeology stuff for a bit. Years before Project Shadow one of Gerald's sons (presumably Maria's dad, since it's stated that the other son is a roboticist and it makes sense for him to be Eggman's dad) discovers this robot built by an ancient civilization while doing some archaeology shit. Gerald finds it in a warehouse some time later while on the ARK. After researching into it more he discovers that this robot is a weapon capable of mimicking the combat and abilities of other people and weapons as well as being reactive to the chaos emeralds. Presumably Gerald puts the robot back into storage because his Journal (the shadow gens one) doesn't mention him again for ages.

So fast forward to Shadow being in-progress. Gerald is researching the robot again and discovers that it is called a Gizoid (he is later given the name Emerl in Sonic Battle). Emerl can establish a "Link" to a person, becoming completely loyal to them, provided they have some sort of power (Gerald shows Emerl a gun). As mentioned, Emerl is a weapon programmed to be very destructive, but currently Gerald has him under his control.

Although, GUN gets demanding again due to still not having results for the immortal super soldiers they wanted. So Gerald hands over Emerl, knowing full well the risk of GUN just giving him something more powerful than the gun Gerald had and developing a Link with them instead. GUN doesn't really give a shit about Emerl though and asks for something else. Gerald uses this as an opportunity to give them a massive, planet-destroying, Death Star-esque laser cannon, called the Eclipse Cannon. Obviously, GUN can never use it, but it's a big powerful weapon and they're the US military so they're happy with it. Its true function is actually for Shadow to use it to blow up the Black Comet when it comes back past Earth in 50 years, because of that whole deal about Shadow being used by Black Doom to conquer Earth. (Gerald does apologise in his journal for kind of actively ruining Shadow's life before he's even been born, but y'know he's kinda on a streak of making bad decisions at this point).

Shadow is finally awakened and quickly becomes incredibly close with Maria, developing a sibling relationship. She tells him about her love for Earth and he takes care of her and looks out for her when she's struggling. Dialogue in Shadow 05 and Shadow Generations suggests that aside from testing and combat training, Shadow was treated like a fairly normal kid. Maria mentions running around the ARK and playing with him, as well as going to school with him (fun fact: Maria says in Shadow Gens that he never handed in any of his homework).

(To get Shadow age discourse out the way: he's physically 15. This is stated in his character bio in the leaked Sonic 06 script, which admittedly is not entirely accurate, but there's also other information to suggest this, such as him having the same height and weight as Sonic (15) and Silver (14) while Knuckles and Espio (both 16) are taller and heavier. And yeah there's some sources that put him as ageless and that script is the only thing to ever give him an actual age and all the character ages were removed from the official bios anyway due to a timeskip between Forces and Frontiers but you get the idea he's physically the same age as Sonic. Also no he did not age while frozen. Go win internet arguments or something)

Gerald also comes to think of Shadow like a son, which is funny because at this point in the Journal he stops referring to Maria's dad as his son. Likely because he and his wife had another child, which reads like they've lost hope in Maria being saved and are starting over. I mean yeah that's very clearly what's going on.

Unfortunately shit starts to go downhill from here. Emerl absorbs enough weapons to make him go out of control and he goes on a destructive rampage across the ARK. He's shut down and Gerald reprograms him with a 'soul' to prevent this from happening again, and a self-destruct function just in case it does. However, the rampage causes those Artifical Chaos robots I mentioned earlier to go out of control as well. Those are taken down as well but an SOS has been sent out to Earth by this point (there were also other general safety concerns bc of the evil demon aliens and. the military blaming other people for things they asked for)

So GUN and the government kinda go "fuck we need to pretend like this isn't out fault" so GUN goes up to space and shuts down the colony. By raiding it and killing almost everyone on board, covering it up by saying there was an accident. Only three ARK residents are known to have survived: Gerald, Shadow, and a kid called Abe (who is the GUN commander in present day). Considering that they spared the only other kid on the ARK, Maria was probably shot because she was with Shadow and was helping him into an escape pod.

Shadow is found and put in cryo and Gerald is arrested by GUN and made to finish his research under supervision. Gerald learns Maria died and goes insane with grief. He becomes immensely hateful towards humanity as a whole and secretly reprograms Shadow's memories to make him think that Maria's final wish was for him to avenge her (by literally destroying the Earth) instead of what it really was, which was to protect the people of Earth. Gerald is then executed by firing squad.

(Additional Robotnik family lore: Takashi Iizuka confirmed not too long ago that Eggman was born after Maria died. Eggman also mentions that he didn't know Maria in one of his unlockable memos in Frontiers, but reveals that her death was felt throughout his childhood. Apparently the attention was never really on him due to everyone always focusing on how great Maria was. Knowing Eggman this may be a slight exaggeration but yeah there's speculation that the Robotnik Family Drama will be relevant at some point since they keep bringing it up in recent materials)

Fast forward 50ish years to SA2. Eggman finds his grandfather's journal from his supervised work while he was being held by GUN and learns about his work on the "Ultimate Life Form" who can destroy things. Eggman wants to conquer the world and he's like yeah I want that so he breaks into the GUN base where Shadow is in cryo. Eggman is also the first person in 50 years to try the password "Maria" to free Shadow (Gerald got to set the password for whatever reason they've rewritten the lore a couple times don't worry about it).

Also Shadow being freed is so funny like you gotta remember he's 15 and an emo bordering on theatre kid and also the last thing he remembers is his sister getting shot and he sees Eggman, probably didn't even clock that it wasn't Gerald for 30 seconds, and is like "I'll grant your wishes bring me the chaos emeralds and meet me on the ARK lol bye" and what he means is "we're gonna blow up the Earth bc the military killed my sister like 3 hours ago as far as i'm concerned" but like he doesn't tell Eggman this so Eggman's just like "fuck yeah let's take over the world". Eggman goes to meet Shadow on the ARK and Shadow explains the Eclipse Cannon and Eggman's like "cool I can use this to threaten Earth until everyone has to submit to me".

Also Rouge is here because she works for GUN as an agent and they want her to investigate Eggman and Shadow. Also GUN is stupid and keeps trying to arrest Sonic because he looks like Shadow and Shadow robbed a museum bc it had an Emerald. They literally have newsreel footage of Shadow and everyone's like "no this is Sonic" (this makes way more sense if you consider that Shadow's original design as when he was being developed as "Terios" was way closer to Sonic's). GUN arrest Sonic twice in this game, and attempt a third time. Sonic escapes police custody twice and evades arrest on the third one. He also says he doesn't like cops this is important. Anyway he and Shadow keep trying to kill each other. Sonic wants to know what the deal is but that doesn't stop him from trying to fight Shadow constantly. Shadow wants to blow up Earth but this also doesn't stop him from fighting Sonic constantly.

Eggman, Rouge and Shadow go to GUN's Prison Island where they send everyone they arrest and then steal the Chaos Emeralds that GUN has and blow up the island. Using the six Emeralds they have, Eggman powers up the Eclipse Cannon and livestreams himself blowing up the moon with it. The Heroes go to the ARK as well and there's some whole drama there but this ain't about them. Eggman gets the seventh Chaos Emerald and puts it into the cannon, which activates Gerald's doomsday plan that Shadow did not tell Eggman about. The ARK sets off on a crash course for Earth so now the Heroes and Eggman and Rouge are trying to turn it off.

Also there was a whole thing where Rouge looks into Project Shadow and all she can find is stuff about the Biolizard so she thinks Shadow is lying or delusional. I mean we know he's telling the truth but back then this was like adding to the mystery. Not that relevant in retrospect. Moving on.

Back to Shadow. His goal is fulfilled and he's kinda just standing there looking out the window as the ARK falls. Amy got left behind when everyone went to go shut down the ARK and she happens to find Shadow and asks what his deal is. She talks about the good of humanity and manages to partially say the exact same thing as Maria said when she put Shadow in the escape pod when she was dying. Shadow remembers Maria's wish for him to give everyone a chance to live and be happy, cries very briefly, and then runs off because he has his real memories back now and needs to fix this shit.

Sonic and Shadow go Super and use Chaos Control to warp the ARK back into orbit and stop the doomsday program. However Shadow isn't accustomed to using a Super form and is weakened (there's this whole thing about Shadow realising that Sonic might be the true Ultimate Life Form if you take long enough on the final boss). Sonic warns him to return back to the ARK but he doesn't, and ends up losing his super form and falling to Earth, presumably dying (Twitter Takeovers are noncanon but #5 says that Sonic tried to save Shadow but Shadow let himself die because otherwise Sonic would've fallen with him and as far as he knew then, died with him. This isn't shown or mentioned in the games but is likely what happened given that Sonic comes back to the ARK afterwards with one of Shadow's inhibitor rings).

Shadow was actually meant to stay dead and SA2 itself was actually pretty vague about what really happened 50 years ago. Pretty much everything I mentioned prior to the SA2 summary was lore introduced in later media (this will be relevant later). But, Shadow ended up becoming the most popular character in the franchise so Sonic Team decided to bring him back for Heroes and write more solid lore for him.

In Heroes, Rouge is stealing some shit from Eggman and finds Shadow in A Tube so she lets him out. He's being guarded by a robot called E-123 Omega, who decides to fight them because he's angry and loves violence and killing things (not a joke). Rouge manages to stop the boys from fighting each other and is like "let's go find Eggman" so they do and also they're called Team Dark now. She wants his treasure, Shadow has amnesia and wants to know who he is and why he's here, and Omega wants to prove to Eggman he's the best robot ever and also kill and destroy things. I dunno why Rouge doesn't think to tell Shadow anything. I assume it's because this was the first third party mainline title and they wanted to keep things simple for new players who hadn't played SA2 which was only available on Dreamcast or Gamecube, neither of which sold well compared to the PS2 or Xbox.

During the story Team Dark finds a Shadow Android, and later, shitloads of them in Eggman's warehouse. Shadow and the others aren't really sure if he's the real Shadow from SA2 or if he's another android who's just gained sentience. At least now Rouge is somewhat justified in not telling him anything since she's not sure if he's real now. Cue Shadow having an identity crisis. This plot carries over to the next game.

Shadow 05 takes place exactly 50 years after Gerald's deal with Black Doom. The Black Comet comes back to Earth and Doom and the rest of the Black Arms start invading and fucking shit up. So Doom wants Shadow to work for him and conquer Earth so he finds his son and asks him to go get the Chaos Emeralds. He also does not tell Shadow that he's his dad he just tells him what to do and leaves him to work it out and Shadow just does this without question because BD clearly knows who he is so he might be able to tell him who he is.

Shadow 05 is infamous for its choose-your-own-adventure story so to quickly list off the noncanon endings he can:

Destroy Earth (Pure Dark/Dark)

Conquer the universe (Pure Dark/Hero)

Side with his dad (Semi Dark/Dark)

Kill Eggman (Semi Dark/Hero)

Decide he's an android and kill Eggman (Neutral/Dark)

Decide he's an android and kill Eggman BUT take over the Eggman Empire and lead and android uprising this time (Neutral/Hero)

Stay on the ARK and become its protector (Semi Hero/Dark)

Have implied suicidal depression (Semi Hero/Hero)

Go insane with power?? idk what's going on (Pure Hero/Dark)

Say he's gonna kill his dad and presumably does it offscreen (Pure Hero/Hero)

The true ending (that doesn't actually lead from any of the previous so who knows how we got here) has Shadow obtain all the Chaos Emeralds and then BD uses them to bring his Comet into Earth's atmosphere so he can start destroying things. BD then loredrops that Shadow was made to help him conquer Earth and he processes this for like a minute then decides to kill BD. BD then loredrops that he's Shadow's dad and Shadow gets really close to crashing out over this one but the Chaotix manage to find an old tape from Gerald just in time and play it for him that helps calm him down a bit and tells him how to kill BD. Also it reminds him of the promise he made to Maria again.

So he goes Super, kills his dad and blows up the Black Comet destroying the entire Black Arms race. Also if you take really really long on this boss fight then Eggman mentions that he found Shadow after he fell to Earth, confirming this is the real Shadow from SA2 and not one of the androids. After BD is killed Shadow seems to have mostly remembered everything and decides to move on from his past and become his own person.

I'm assuming Sonic Battle takes place after Shadow 05 because he knows he was made by Gerald in this game. So Sonic finds Emerl, that Gizoid robot from earlier, and everyone befriends him but is also trying to work out who/what Emerl is. Sonic says that although Emerl is a weapon of mass destruction, he has a heart and he trusts him to not destroy things, just like Shadow. Shadow has a mini crisis over this and is wondering why he has a soul and feelings if he was created as a weapon and Rouge sits him down and tells him that Gerald didn't want him to be a weapon. Shadow still has Feelings about this but that's kinda it here.

06 isn't canon and also barely makes sense but it had good Shadow characterisation. So we're gonna cover this as quickly as possible. So Shadow works for GUN now (for some reason?? it's only in this game whatever) and he and Rouge go to get The Time God of Italy. or half of it. this half of it is Mephiles, who takes the form of Shadow's shadow. Mephiles and Shadow keep fighting during the game and Mephiles taunts him that hundreds of years in the future, humans blame Shadow for the apocalypse (caused by Mephiles. who looks like Shadow. so) and put him in cryo again (oh yeah Shadow's immortal I don't think I ever clarified that but you probably worked it out). Anyway at the end of Shadow's story he says this raw ass line "if the world chooses to become my enemy i will fight like i always have" and then he takes off his inhibitors and blows up Mephiles. But Mephiles doesn't die and then kills Sonic and then fuses with the other half of the Italian Sun slash Time god and then there's the bit where a human girl kisses a dead Sonic and now he's alive again and triple S go super and blow up the Italian Time slash Sun god. Sonic then erases the god from existence and bam 06 isn't canon anymore praise be.

Is anyone still reading this. Why? I'm not even taking this seriously anymore I'm enjoying this way too much.

So allegedly Sonic Prime is canon and it probably takes place somewhere vaguely around here. Sonic Prime actually doesn't fit on the timeline due to ooc and also Cubot and Orbot but it's "after Sonic Advance 3" so it's either before or after 06. Anyway Sonic accidentally breaks spacetime and is now hopping around the multiverse. Shadow is here too so that he has someone to play off of. They're like. Really gay here like there had to be at least one sonadow fan on the writing team why did they do the SA2 falling thing again that's evil. Also there's one line at the end of season 2 iirc that got translated into. actual romantic language in some dubs kinda like the destiel confession adding in the line for Dean in the Spanish dub. does this mean sonadow is destiel 2. i need to start calling buddie destiel 3. Shadow breaks the sound barrier 3 times in the finale to save Sonic's life while bridal carrying him. love wins. Sonic Prime is pretty mid but bonus points for good yaoi 7/10

In terms of the next big Shadow lore game we have Shadow Generations. The Time Eater sends Shadow to the void but manages to send Maria and Gerald there too from a point in time not too long before shit went down on the ARK. Shadow kinda has the worst day of his life in this one. Also Black Doom managed to regrow himself but he's not at full power. He wants to use Shadow as a vessel due to him being the Ultimate Life Form and so activates all of Shadow's alien biology, making him "perfect" so BD can take over his body. In some ways this acts as closure for Shadow since yknow. He's had amnesia TWICE since he knew them and also the Gerald here gets to tell Shadow all the stuff that he'd only heard previously in recordings about the Black Arms. Gerald also finally Apologises to Shadow directly. Shadow gets like really angry at BD but Maria comforts him and tells him to not give into BD and his anger, since he exists to show the way to the light. Shadow kills his dad for a second time. Gerald and Maria are sent back to their time and Shadow tries to stop it and almost has a panic attack (for the second time this game he has one in the prequel) but Maria comforts him again. Shadow cries again and that's the end of the game.

So by the time we get to Sonic Forces he's kinda just doing his own antihero thing and sometimes works with Team Dark. He kills (? at least beats the shit out of) Jackal Squad, a mercenary team that was working for Eggman at the time. He spares the leader and calls him weak and pathetic and leaves. And this GROWN ASS MAN throws a fit over this and decides he has to prove he isn't weak. So he agrees to be a test subject in Eggman's latest experiement with this rock called the Phantom Ruby that has incredibly inconsistent properties but the big one is Virtual Reality (this in itself is presented inconsistently). So Infinite is infused with the power of the Ruby and wears a mask now because his previous weakling face was unsightly or something. He then decides to shut down Omega and torment Shadow (who doesn't remember him) for calling him weak. He then tells Shadow he's gonna go kill Sonic for some reason. And then does (or at least everyone thinks he does). This is all in the prequel DLC. Shadow shows up halfway through the main game to help the heroes and that's about it.

And that's kinda it. There's the IDW comics in terms of what I'd consider major appearances but I'm like 2 years behind on those so idk what Shadow's up to in those now. There was also the July 2021 Sonic Channel story with him that kinda altered my brain chemistry. Not entirely sure when it takes place. Pre-Forces maybe? You can read a TL of it here.

Oh yeah I should clarify on what was said in the 4kids post. So in that I talked about how the dub in avoiding an onscreen character death actually caused Shadow MCD. Sonic X is interesting because it was developed at around the same time as the "Shadow arc" of games in the early 2000s and ends up taking a different approach to the truth of 50 years ago. I haven't watched X fully yet but from what I know about it Maria never knew Shadow. All of that stuff was made up by Gerald and put in Shadow's brain. Like Maria did exist and there's a whole episode where they meet the soldier who shot her but she didn't know Shadow. Iirc it was something to do with the escape pods she sent down being empty thereby implying Shadow was created entirely on Earth post-GUN raid.

Following the game's SA2 adaptation and his later return, Shadow meets a girl called Molly in season 3. She's a fighter on her planet that's at war and mostly destroyed. Iirc she wants to keep fighting, but her friends are growing hopeless and think they're all just gonna die in battle and never get to live. Long story short, at the end of the episode, she sacrifices herself and charges her fighter ship straight at the enemy and is killed when it crashed into the enemy ship. In the series finale, Shadow helps Sonic fight Dark Oak, the main antagonist of the season, and isn't seen again afterwards, presumably having died. However, he shows up during the credits, visiting Molly's grave, confirming he's still alive.

4kids obviously didn't like the child death, so at the end of Molly's episode she ends up just flying away and says she'll come back someday. The scene of her grave is cut from the series finale for obvious reasons, but in turn makes it seems like Shadow died in the previous episode. Good shit.

If you made it here. Good lord. Uh. I love my son he has every disease. He's so cute here I want to throw him at a wall.

Watch Love Live it's really good please just watch it. And then watch LL Sunshine because it's even better.

AND READ PROJECT SEKAI STORIES.

(Also yes this is the longest post on my blog)

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

I just had the mental image of Tim getting de-aged mentally and physically to a literal one year old.

Except the scars are all still there.

How much do you wanna bet the Jason has a mental breakdown when he takes one look at a literal baby with a scar on his throat and various other places that he put there?

How do you think Damian would feel about the scars he left?

How would Dick react to the scar of the missing spleen and freak out even more than he already is because this baby is immuno compromised without it and older Tim is too but he is so much more vulnerable like this and if Tim had had a support system when he went on the Bruce quest he might not be missing a spleen?

How much do you wanna bet Bruce is not putting down baby Tim but he's also so scared whole he's holding him because he's so small and fragile what if holds him too tight and hurts him on accident.

The inherent understanding of pain only when it is on the young is something that is so heart breaking.

Because Jason if you can't imagine slitting the throat of a 1 year old why would you do it to a 15 year old.

Because every person is made up of all those little bits form 1, to 17, to 35 your still that person just older.

I think sometimes if forgotten that at some point everyone was small and innocent and only wished for kindness.

Bruce would never put that baby down and baby Tim is in love with the cuddles.

Also I am sobbing.

[bugs1nmybrain]

Masterlist (18+) ♡☆♡☆♡☆

This is a comprehensive list of all my fics and headcanons. These are all x readers, and the reader is almost always fem. Listed at the end are things that I will write and won't write.

I do take requests!! I have busy schedule though, so it may take up to months for me to get to yours.

Characters I write for: L Lawliet, Tomura Shigaraki, Shouta Aizawa, and Professor Franken Stein, my ocs

I am also a self-shipper! I may post content about my f/os and the time I spend with them. If that makes you uncomfortable, then take a walk!

Minors CANNOT interact with these posts, as 98% of them are nsfw.

Date updated: 8/16/24

I have a personal blog I'm currently writing more than fanfiction about my experiences with fictosexuality throughout the lifespan. There is sensitive content in these blogs about csa, grooming, and trauma, but I've created "reader appropriate" versions of the first chapter and will continue to. You can find it here:

<3Lydia’s Very Convoluted but Interesting History of Romance with Fictional Characters (Titled to be changed later)<3

Chapter 1, reader friendly version

Chapter 1, uncensored

L Lawliet ♡♡♡

L Lawliet With a Shy & Insecure Reader (hcs)

Somno/Morning Sex with L (smut fic)

Fem!L x Fem!Reader

Food play with L (self insert smut)

Drunk 69 with L

Voyeurism and Somnophilia with L (smut fic)

L Lawliet x Bipolar Reader (headcanons)

Intricate: L x Chubby! Reader NSFW (smut fic)

Distraction (smut fic)

L x Curvy! Reader (headcanons)

What L Would Do When He's in Love (headcanons)

NSFW Headcanons

L and reader lose their virginities together (smut fic)

The Task Force walks in on you and L making out (fic)

Pet names he'd call you (headcanons)

L x INFP! Reader (headcanons)

L x Short! Reader (headcanons)

L x Reader: First Time Headcanons

L x Chubby! Reader (headcanons)

L SFW Alphabet

L NSFW Alphabet

L Relationship Headcanons

Tomura Shigaraki ♡♡♡

Bipolar!Tomura x fic (one-shot)

Shigaraki x Fem!Reader: Shiggy crushing on reader - Two Part One-shot

Bipolar Shigaraki Headcanons

Fem Shiggy Headcanons

Shigaraki walks in on Re-Destro talking shit about you (short fic)

Shigaraki's Psychological Conditions Headcanons

Shigaraki x Fem!Reader Anal Sex (One-shot fic)

Give Your Heart a Break - shigaraki x reader series

chapter 1

chapter 2

chapter 3

Clingy!Tomura x reader hcs

Kisses with Shigaraki (headcanons)

Shigaraki with a Girlfriend Headcanons (w: dub-con/non-con, domestic abuse)

Neko!Shigaraki and Reader smut

Stoned Bathroom Sex with Tomura

Sfw Reverse Comfort MDLB (mommy dom/little boy)

Mommy Kink with Shigaraki (smut fic)

Shigaraki x Chubby! Reader Headcanons

Nasty (Period sex) (smut fic)

NSFW Headcanons

NSFW Alphabet

Shiggy x Short! Reader (headcanons)

Tomura fucking you in front of Dabi (smut fic, TW: dub-con)

Shouta Aizawa ♡♡♡

Professor!Aizawa x College Student (this sucks n is vry ooc)

Aizawa x Bigender reader hcs

Aizawa x reader headcanons

Emotional Support Sex with Shouta

NSFW Headcanons

Aizawa x Bipolar! Reader (headcanons)

Aizawa x Virgin! Reader (smut fic)

Aizawa x Short! Reader (headcanons)

Aizawa SFW Headcanons

Aizawa x College Student! Reader (smut fic)

Aizawa NSFW Headcanons

Aizawa x Chubby! Reader (headcanons)

Aizawa Relationship Headcanons

Franken Stein ♡♡♡

Stein x Immuno-compromised Reader (headcanons)

NSFW Alphabet

Stein x Chubby! Reader (headcanons)

Liela Lovesworth (my oc) ♡♡♡

Confession (sfw)

F/O CONTENT

L x me art

Aizawa and I's 4 yr anniversary post

What I will write♡♡♡!!:

Nsfw/smut

fem characters (ex: fem L, fem Tomura, etc)

fem-reader

enby reader with female anatomy or male anatomy (please specify for nsfw)

male reader but I've never done it

Any character that I write for

fluff

sfw

crack fic

Power play (not noncon)

problematic content

Mental illness (bipolar, schizophrenia, ocd, etc)

Mommy/daddy kink

Chubby reader

anal but not rough

What I WON'T write ×!×!×:

Minors/pedophilia

scat

blood/mutilation (with the exception of period sex)

Anything ridiculously out of character

Rape/noncon

Yandere (I will write obsessive partners and codependent relationships, but no kidnapping or stuff like that)

violence

Furry (except nekos)

Incest

Characters I don't write for

Chains/leather/etc

[feminist-space]

There is nothing wrong with a person who wears adult diapers. Those are an aid, a tool, to help that person be more mobile and preserve their dignity.

If someone has tremors in their hands and needs help picking up everyday objects, that doesn't take away from who they are as a person. There's no dishonor in muscular tremors.

If someone can't see or hear, or can only see or hear with aid of a tool, a piece of technology, that's fine! Here's a really simple one: so many of us wear glasses because our eyes can't do the thing on their own.

Having disabilities doesn't take away from who a person is. Mocking someone for needing aid to do things, however, is morally repugnant. And using ableism to put down or mock someone who themselves is morally reprehensible is still never ok.

It is important for all of us to re-examine how we, too, perform ableist acts in our daily lives. Here are some simple ones:

Stop using ableist words (check out this page: https://www.autistichoya.com/p/ableist-words-and-terms-to-avoid.html).

Stop calling disabled people "inspirational" and using them as a way to say "if they can do it then so can you" (see: paralympic commentaries from the same people who still support organizations like Autism Speaks -- https://www.themarysue.com/the-autism-speaks-controversy-explained/).

Stop mocking people for not being able to move the way you think they should move.

Stop calling bigots "crazy" (their bigotry isn't a mental illness).

Stop saying that "only disabled and immuno-compromised people are at risk from COVID-19" when what is unsaid after that is "so that's why I don't need to care about it or take any precautions."

Stop calling someone "blind" or "deaf" when they're being ignorant.

Stop making fun of someone for taking an elevator or using a motorized scooter at the store.

Eliminate the stigma of disabled people asking for accessibility by making things accessible in the first place.

When you're in a position to design things, physical or otherwise (buildings, software, apps), think about accessibility.

Actively learn from disability activists, what things are actually helpful and actually accessible. Incorporate those things into your design.

Hire and elevate to positions of leadership people with disabilities (and if your gut response is "but we hire by merit," I challenge you: are you telling me you don't think disabled folks can perform the duties of leaders in your organization? What are you saying, exactly?).

Change your organization to be supportive to disabled employees, and get rid of policies that marginalize them.

There's a whole LOT of ableism weaved in to literally everything. Even if we don't get it all in one go (and we won't), it's important to put in the work to do better.

--

Before someone comments with these:

"what's wrong with people?"

Ableism is EVERYWHERE, it is in EVERYTHING in this world and we have to actively work against it. Don't assume you're exempt. None of us are.

"who says these things?" "who does these things?"

A lot of people. A lot of people you might love. A lot of people that might include us (likely, actually). These mostly aren't monsters in alleyways saying and doing ableist things.

It's the nurse getting annoyed at the person using a wheelchair for having their wheelchair there. It's the dude at the gym who tells his friend that if those paralympians can do it, they definitely can do it. It's the person who keeps telling their friend with long covid to just do more yoga. It's the liberal angry at Trump who mocks him by saying he wears adult diapers. It's the person who builds a business branded and marketed on being kumbaya "we're so progressive" but they made their doors so heavy that they're hard for anyone to open and definitely impossible to open for a wheelchair user. It's the boomer telling a young person using a disabled parking spot that young people can't be disabled. It is literally everywhere. It's that guy telling disabled people they shouldn't be out past sunset ("we're disabled, Daniel, we're not werewolves."--Jen L Rossman).

--

Reading list, obviously not exhaustive:

https://thebodyisnotanapology.com/magazine/14-black-disabled-women-reminding-us-of-our-power/

https://thedailytexan.com/2018/03/23/stop-using-ableist-language-and-call-out-others-who-use-it

https://www.autistichoya.com/p/ableist-words-and-terms-to-avoid.html

https://www.tolerance.org/magazine/no-joking-matter-words-and-disability

https://diaryofadisabledperson.blog/

https://www.thegauntlet.news/p/disabled-peoples-exclusion-from-indoor

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/being-grabbed-pushed-touched-without-27376323

https://www.sociability.app/blog/the-medical-vs-social-model-of-disability

[rjalker]

[ID: A screeenshot of an article preview, showing a small mannequin tiredly dragging a disposable mask, titled, "NPR: Wrestling With My Husband's Fear of Getting COVID Again: My husband is high risk and still takes COVID precautions. I want our old life back." End ID.]

Article link. Has been saved to the Wayback Machine.

Every other week, Jackson meets with a support group for family members of people who were critically ill with COVID. Many of the participants are women who "are having to negotiate their husbands' fears of socializing, traveling or even going to the doctor," he says.

So we're implying that immuno-compromised, traumatized people who are at serious risk of dying from another infection of Covid, which almost killed them the first time, are misogynists now, because their wives, who only had mild cases, want to have more fun and not care about safety.

(Sarcasm: Cool. Great. Totally normal. End sarcasm).

And pretending it's some horrible terrible unspeakable thing for someone to wear a mask outside. As though that's somehow harmful.

I really fucking hate our society.

oh and also the whole article is lightening "would likely die" to "could get very sick".

[tseecka]

I made a zine!

As you may know, February 29th (28th on non-leap years) is Rare Disease Awareness Day. This is a day of the year where we try to bring attention and education about any number of rare conditions that can affect the population, which are low on funding, research, and support.

My wife was diagnosed last year with Behcet's Disease/Behcet's Syndrome, a form of vasculitis which can affect every blood vessel in her body. It is a chronic and incurable condition. Since receiving her diagnosis, she has been on three separate medications (none of which have worked, and all of which have caused her to be varying levels of immuno-compromised). She has been in extreme joint and muscle pain nearly every day, which is not helped by the cold climate in our part of Canada at this time of year. On any given night, it's 50/50 odds on whether she can get a decent/full night's sleep. There is no physical relief. The disease has disabled her and, in general, negatively affected her mental health and quality of life.

My younger sister went through breast cancer treatment last year and while I would not wish that experience on anyone, nor would I call it anything close to easy, it has been somewhat remarkable to see the difference that it makes having a well-known, well-researched disease vs. having one that medical professionals haven't heard of, or need spelled out for them when they're making notes to your file.

She is my sweet bun, my soul mate and my literal best friend, and I can't do anything to help her. I can't bring her relief; I can't find a cure. But I can do a little bit to bring awareness, in the hopes that the more people know, the more attention we can bring this condition; much like the journey that EDS and POTS patients have been through in the past few years, sometimes visibility is key to having these rare diseases recognized, understood, and tackled.

I have made two copies of the zine available for download and print/distribution. The first one is scanned and resized to be printable on a home inkjet printer with standard margins; there will be white space at the edges of some pages, but it will fold evenly and the pages will be aligned correctly.

The second one is a scan of the full 8.5x11 original. It's very nearly edge to edge. If you have access to a printer that can print full bleed, this one has the better formatting and is more "accurate" to the original.

[riggedbones]

Amazing: This dancer is considered an 'Essential Worker'

Once a week this taco shop in Boystown, Chicago lays off its staff so this Immuno-compromised man can dance.

The entire staff is rehired the next day.

We got these shots with A Go Pro®

This Monday The Blue Angels will fly extra low to support this Hero's dancing

Extremely low..

But The Angels said it wasn't low enough

So Chicago bit the bullet

The Blue Angels will be flying BELOW the city this Monday.

But it's costing Chicago vital infrastructure The mayor had this to say

"The drill sounded cool to me"

But god didn't like that answer

So he took The Sun away

But Then LollaPalooza Happened

And The Economy Went UP

And The Sun started a GoFundMe

So next time you're walking around during the day

Don't Forget To thank this Nameless Hero

[beautifulpersonpeach]

For the Anon who sent a follow up ask on Jimin’s vocals and how people talk about HYBE groups in general.

You linked to a malicious gallery I’d rather not share here. I’ve talked about this over and over so I only care to give an abridged reply.

When I say I personally don’t take k-pop stans seriously, I’m not saying that because I don’t care about the hate thrown at BTS and Jimin.

Here’s three key things I believe about k-pop stans in general after being in this space for a good decade and some change:

1. For most of them, what they don’t understand, they hate. It’s really that simple. And because k-pop has been dominated and shaped by the customs, music, and stylistic choices of the Big3 for decades, before BTS upended everything, a typical k-pop stan has been literally raised, (for lack of a better word), to consume certain types of music and in particular ways.

Even the culture of streaming and chart watching, believe it or not, didn’t start with ARMYs. ARMYs aren’t even the worst expression I’ve seen of it. It started with fans of Big3 groups. SM stans were notorious chart watchers and still are. They moved massive numbers in sales (mass bought) for that singular purpose as far back as 2009. YG stans perfected streaming on YouTube before BTS had their first win, and would lord those titles over any other group. And none of those behaviours have disappeared, they just stopped being loud about it after BTS had taken any record *they* considered important. It’s why so many of them are salivating at the thought of Fifty Fifty getting a Grammy nomination and win, regardless of the fact BTS is the reason k-pop is being considered for that calibre of American awards to begin with. It’s why I laugh when I see k-pop fans say ARMYs are obsessed with charts and that streaming is unpaid fan labour etc, because that’s clearly more indicative of the stan experience of those k-pop fans than anything ARMYs are doing given the absolute numbers in the fandom. ARMY as a fandom has more in common with Swifties than they do with Exols, Blinks or Carats for example, and would be pulling Taylor Swift numbers if the fandom weren’t penalized for doing the same things Swifties do. And better too.

Like, I might as well be saying water is wet when I say *nobody* is more chart conscious than a k-pop stan. But these stans cannot understand why BTS exists, why BTS is at the top of a hierarchy *they* designed… why Jimin’s vocals which sounds nothing like their famed “SM vocals” is a key defining reason for the biggest k-pop group in the world being so. Till today, after all the studies, essays, thinkpieces, k-pop stans cannot understand why BTS is so successful they’ve single-handedly built the largest k-pop conglomerate in history to the point the capitalizations of the Big3 *combined* is only a fraction of HYBE. They can’t understand it, so they hate it.

Anything deviates from the norm is met with ridicule and hate. It’s like an immuno-response to anything they feel threatens their idea of k-pop as they’ve previously understood it. And like I keep saying, that very behavior is structurally supported by the companies.

*

2. Like many people on the internet, most k-pop stans have no idea what they’re talking about. As a general rule, by the time you’ve read something about BTS on Reddit, it’s been regurgitated previously by k-pop stans on Naver, Quora and Twitter. And before you’ve seen something on Tumblr, people have been overdoing it on Reddit. Nearly all the narratives about all the companies and most groups in this space, I’ve seen at least 20 times each. Each new wave of k-pop stans absorb these narratives perhaps without realizing it, and even the few who attempt to critically dissect them in *discourse*, rely very heavily on other narratives that do the same.

It’s how not too long ago I saw a blogger I later learned was known for her critical discourse, drawing connections between Jimin, Bang PD, and Scooter Braun for their poor treatment of women, without realizing the quotes she was attributing to Jimin, actually came from Taemin on a Korean radio show, and there was more substantial proof demonstrating Lee Sooman’s misogyny and religious ties, than anything a corporate relationship between Hybe, Jimin, and Scooter showed. But what she was saying, whether she realized it or not, came from a naver blog taken down in 2020 that made that initial mistranslation (or false attribution). Like, she just heard that shit somewhere and was doing discourse on it here like it was fact. But people already inclined to think HYBE = bad, BTS + women = weird, or Jimin = ????, will be inclined to believe that, *whether it makes sense or not*. For example, on another occasion where I saw two bloggers make a similar theory re: BTS must view women poorly because HYBE bought Scooter Braun’s company, to which I pointed out how ridiculous guilt by association was. To drive home that point, it was only after I asked how ridiculous that logic would be if they applied it to Taemin (who they biased and who has actually made worrying comments on women in interviews, though I don’t believe he holds those views now) and his relationship with Lee Sooman which has strengthened over the years by all appearances, it’s only then they saw a problem with guilt by association, though, even at the most basic level that argument never had any logical basis.

So like, most of the people in k-pop spaces frankly shitpost 24/7/365/6. Most of what counts for *Discourse* is essentially recycled theories indulged in by people frustrated with something/one else, presented in neutral academic language, proper punctuation or narrated in a monotone voice (in podcasts or video essays).

I can count on two hands the number of times I’ve seen a truly original idea in k-pop circles. And at the same time, this means I’ve seen what counts for hate too many times for it to have any bite.

3. BTS can take care of themselves. Let them receive the criticism. Let them be ridiculed. This might be harsh to hear, but I think it’s not our place to stop it, unless it’s abuse that makes *our own fan experience less pleasant*. Clean up your spaces for yourself first, not because you’re trying to save Yoongi, Jungkook, or Jimin from qrts on a tweet. Unless it’s abuse, then report and block the abuser on principle. BTS were hated from the jump, but were still celebrated by most k-pop stans until they became too big for the rules of this space to hurt them. I’m not being dramatic when I say the existence of BTS alone upsets the whole ordained balance in k-pop.

BTS have explicitly detailed their experience. And have said they’ve intentionally chosen to play the game their way. Listen to them.

Get used to the idea of what it means to be a fan of BTS. Make sure you understand it. The boys are talented, driven, virtuosic artists, and complicated people too with very human vices. The music they make is just plain good and deserves to be celebrated anywhere anytime. They’re also a group that’s unlikely to ever be fully accepted anywhere, if their track record so far is any indication and because they choose to go about things in ways a lot of people will never get.

Such as the manti who just walked into my inbox asking me why *HYBE doesn’t give RM and Jimin more than two MVs when NewJeans gets six. Aside from the fact that HYBE has nothing to do with how BigHit manages their artist, same with Ador, please remember who you claim to support.

The boys will be back in 2026, and they’ll be ready to shake things up even more than they’ve done in the last 10 years. I have no idea what that will look like, I don’t even know if I’ll like the changes/direction. What I will be doing though, is ready to have the time of my life with the music and performances they create for the people who value them.

[welcome-to-green-hills]

how do you think they’ll tackle Maria’s character in the 3rd movie? Do you think they’ll make her appear frequently or rarely?

Hello, my dear!❤️✨

I’m terribly sorry for taking so long on your ask. I wanted to make sure that my thoughts and feelings were clear for my answer. I feel that there will be a healthy amount of Maria Robotnik content in the third film. What “healthy amount” means exactly is up for your interpretation.

Throughout the years, we're given a sample of Maria and who she is through video games and TV shows. She doesn't necessarily make big appearances, but we've learned plenty of the little girl that grew up on the Space Colony ARK. With various game titles and character interactions, we see that Maria Robotnik plays a significantly large role in people's lives. She might not get a whole lot of screen time in general, but we—as the audience—can feel how beloved and cared for she was with others. We can feel her pure love and support emitted by found family members, ARK scientists, and others that watched her grow up. Even Sonic, who was born fifty years after the ARK raids by G.U.N., valued her immensely (Sonic Channel Story, 2021). We can painfully see the love that is generously given to a 12-year-old girl. This shows that one or two sentences (I.E. Sonic Battle, Gerald's Journal), or even a flashback is just as fruitful in conveying her purpose of existence and her golden heart.

I can completely understand and appreciate where you are coming from. For a character that makes minor appearances here and there, it's incredible seeing how much her legacy is cared for by those that are still living... and how fans view her. It's It's only fitting that we buy into curiosity and explore her character more. We must understand that Maria Robotnik is important. It's crucial to see how much of an influence she makes to core characters in the third film.

In game canon, we can conclude that nearly everything that occurs has an influence with Maria in mind. Project Shadow almost didn't happen if it weren't for Maria being diagnosed with Neuro-Immuno Deficiency Syndrome (NIDs). If Prof. Gerald Robotnik was not given the opportunity by the United Federations to seek the answers of immortality, then there wouldn't be a strong drive to desperately use government funding to finish making Shadow in order to find a cure to NIDs. Without the compassion and humanity that Maria gives to Shadow, our hedgehog-alien hybrid would most definitely have viewed himself as an artificial weapon. He wouldn't bat an eye on the possibility of being a relatively good person if the idea was not proposed to him. Without Maria, Prof. Gerald Robotnik would never have had the inspiration needed to craft Shadow's soul like Maria's. Without Maria's horrific death, the crippling insanity that Prof. Gerald Robotnik faces would not have been a driving influence to reprogram Shadow's mind to carry out revenge on the planet. This is malicious act that did more harm that good to a literal adolescent if you think about it. And without Maria's entire existence, we might not have the understanding on Dr. Robotnik/Eggman's influence of becoming a mad scientist today.

The third Sonic movie needs establish how beloved Maria was when she alive. The fantastic thing about these movies is that they've left enough wriggle room with subplots (it's heavily implied that Longclaw and her people have engaged with humans and Earth frequently), character interactions (Dr. Robotnik and Agent Stone talking about aspirations of continuing an evil plan that were planned years ago, implying that the United States government knew about aliens and the Chaos Emeralds), and other possibilities (Green Hills, Montana having a Wachowski look after the town for over 50 years; all of the town's memorabilia implying that it's residents were retired government veterans) for us to weave the past into a perfect timeline. Even if Jim Carrey doesn't return to reprise the role of "Dr. Robotnik," we can see that his plans for world domination are honored with Prof. Gerald Robotnik in mind. Agent Stone would acting upon a dead man's wish.

I think that when I say a "healthy amount," I mean that there's enough for us to fill gaps in for places that need them. I hope that this answers your question, my dear.

[x22817]

Hek and I have done more in the last week than we have in the last year. We had way too much fun! Hek was showered with well-deserved compliments everywhere we went.

This is her watching me eat under the table at a very busy restaurant. Some may see it as a Bean begging to be shared with, but it's really her doing her job. I encourage her to watch me, especially when I'm eating, because a lot of her alerts/interruptions are visual. This meal was a fast food restaurant that I particularly struggled with. Hek ended up just laying her head on the bench so she could watch my hands continuously, and I could easily switch from harming myself to petting her.

Drug and health update below

Now that my parents are gone, I'm changing all the drug stuff. It's time to once again drop on my prednisone dose. The Fludrocortisone probably needs to be increased, but I can't do anything about that rn. I'm also changing the times I'm taking everything in hopes it will ease the tapering experience.

Current schedule:

12:00 - 5mg Pred

4:00 - 100mcg Levothyroxine

7:00 - 10mg Pred + 0.1mg Fludro

17:00 - 2.5mg Pred

22:00 - 2.5mg Pred

New schedule:

11:00 - 5mg Pred

5:00 - 100mcg Levo + 7.5mg Pred + 0.1mg Fludro

17:00 - 2.5mg Pred

Straight up, I'm not excited to transition from the immuno suppressive level to the adrenal support level. Pain and energy levels are meh at best. My joints are already becoming problematic again, especially my fingers and toes. I'm struggling with sleeping in every way, which baffles my endo, but idk what to tell her. Mostly, it's the salt cravings that have skyrocketed in the last two months that are driving me crazy. The weight problem is just something I'm learning to live with at this point. It's all water retention and gaining the weight I couldn't keep on before the cortisol.

[tlamodblog]

2023 Review & Retrospective

So 2023 was a crazy year for me personally. I feel like its a crutch when i say "sorry no art for a while because I am sick AF" but it truly was a hectic health wise.

I returned home just before new year last years (2022 to 2023) feeling terrible, mostly huge pain in my armpits. I think it was like 5 days into January that I woke up in the middle of the evening with an abscess the size of a golfball stuck to me, and causing ALOT of pain, like mind-numbing-pain. So I went to the ER twice, the first time they gave me pain meds and sent me home, but the second time they performed emergency surgery to remove the abscess

At this point there was clearly a problem, so I went to specialist and got diagnosed with Hidradentitis Suppurativa (HS). A very VERY rare skin problem for men. 1 in about 200,000 people suffer from it varying levels of severity, and only about 1 in 10 of those are men, so doing some quick math that makes me one in four men in Norway who have it. Blegh.

Took about 6 months to recover from surgery, and in the interim I moved onto experimental medicine because HS has no cure, only ways to help manage.

One of the medicines intentionally lowers my immune system and infects me with a second disease to help fight HS, which gives me bouts of exhaustion and pain. Hence why I was broken with my drawing schedule.

Being on immuno suppressants also meant I couldn't travel, so I was stuck in Bergen getting cabin fever. Also ended up getting food poisoning at some stage and COVID in December which SUCKED. Not having a proper immune system is NOT FUN, the smallest of sniffles turns into weeks of suck.

Overall the year was just me trying to get better. Doctors already said I will not be free of HS for a while/ever. So it will be an ongoing struggle. However, I will NOT go to the Emergency Room this year. In retrospect getting emergency surgery where I lost a decent chunk of my arm... not good and caused a lot of additional problems, which I will be avoiding this years.. hopefully.

In terms of art I need to get back into it. I have been doing a lot of private stuff on discords mostly, but still giving Tumblr some love in a goal. I love the interactions so maybe more back-and-forths with artists on here is my motivation.

Here's to 2024 being a more healthy year for me, and I hope to do some traveling too. Thanks for everyone's continued support and messages. I hope to do and be better, both on health and art, and as a person. Cheers!

[a-beneficial-union]

I've written myself into a bot of a corner here. As it stands, Vulp-ens have two sets of most vital organs (lungs, heart valves, etctera) but drastically different immuno responses. Or rather, different severities of responses.

When a human's body tries to remove and kill off a contaminant, it raises its internal temperature above what viruses and bacteria can withstand. It also reduces overall system functions to divert resources and mass produces mucous to trap invaders and protect areas which might be otherwise exposed to external substances (such as the air in our esophaguses).

Midland Vulps do all of those, but their fevers reach higher temperatures (as fungi are a much bigger problem on Vulpin) and their mucous contains toxins intended to (1) more quickly kill off contagions (2) dissuade other organisms from trying to take a bite of them while ill. (Imagine if trees could snap you up if they thought you were easy pickin's; that's about what we're dealing with here.)

The problem is that those aforesaid temperatures would exceed human limits, with 103 degrees Fahrenheit being the average for a fever. If the Vulp systems catch a low grade fever, would this serve as a high grade infection for the rest of the body?

In the fic I've been tinkering with on-and-off, Work's In Progress, a combination of stress, willful sleep deprivation, mild malnutrition, menstruation, and consistent overworking causes Ren to get sick mid-fic, as it was originally supposed to be a slice of life story wherein Ren copes while being systemically disallowed from proper recovery (the Plumbers weren’t designed to accommodate chronic fatigue and Ren's learned to just fix things themself).

I do not know how sickness would work for them. I do not know if I should give them a high grade fever (by human terms); a lopsided sickness effecting their Vulp systems directly and the rest inadvertently; or if they should have some method to manage the extreme departures such that it doesn’t damage their human systems. Each would be portrayed very differently, especially since spoiler spoiler spoiler.

(Just kidding, Ren was volunteered for medical/psycnological observation by the Saturdays before they get sick, it was one of the things that was stressing them out. The Saturdays are well intentioned but wholly unprepared for the inner workings of the Plumbers, assuming instead that the leader with the supernaturally powerful offspring (grandchild) would behave similarly to themselves (familial/supportive rather than exploitative).)

(Ren is compliant with the Saturdays because they know it wouldn’t end well if they declined after having been volunteered by Max. For the Saturdays, this was originally a matter of networking; trying to get some business relationships in with the Alien departments given that their jobs occasionally overlaps. For the Plumbers and Galvans, this is part of a continuing political stunt on several fronts. (1) It reinforces that they have control over their potentially temperamental bioweapon (Ren/Omnitrix), (2) it signals that they surely care about this living person whom they certainly don't exploit as a scapegoat/lab rat, and (3) it functions as legal protection regarding Ren's functionality (healthy human versus machine versus dysfunctional animal).)

[garobenart]

Having a bad flareup, the last few months have been extra bad but frankly things have been pretty harrowing for years, because I live in a country that fully decided that disabled and immuno-compromised people could just die! Covid is killing as many people here as ever and my wife lost her job in November in which the person said it was literally because she has ADHD, mind you it was probably also because she's trans and she'd been working there for 7 years so she'd had too many raises and they wanted to pay someone else less to do her job.

So anyway of course my health problems were like oh yeah NOWs a great time to get extra bad! I've been in a ton of pain and here's some art about it from the last couple years.

If you wanna support a disabled queer person and her wife you can DM me or email me for a list of paintings for sale or commission info but honestly just

wear a mask

be kind

maybe reblog also actually that'd help too