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dangerouslyallaboutdraco · 4 years ago

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Not your father

A/n: Set during the HBP with Death Eater Draco. Angst.

It was never how he imagined his life would turn out, you both knew that and it was blindingly obvious when anyone took a second to look at Draco as anything more than his father’s son.

The summer you spent at Malfoy Manor after Lucius got sent to Azkaban wasn’t as much fun as the previous one when Narcissa had let you and Draco run wild around the house.

No, that summer was spent stepping on eggshells around the woman whose husband was in the worst place one could imagine and trying to comfort Draco.

You always saw a dark side in Lucius, at just 11 you were pretty sure that 11-year-old Draco hadn’t come to his conclusion about muggle-borns by himself and when you finally saw Lucius a year later in Flourish and Blotts being incredibly rude to an 11-year-old Ginny you confirmed your theory of this wicked man’s brainwashing.

It wasn’t until third year that you really got close with Draco after you had to take him to the infirmary. Of course, by then you knew his very vocal position on people of different origin than him and yourself but there was a good side of him that you saw, even if it was buried under a mountain of horrible comments.

As soon as you were allowed to leave to Hogsmeade on weekend trips you accompanied Draco and his friends and, although it took him a few long weeks, he eventually asked you out on a date and later that year to be his girlfriend.

And it was good until summer came and Draco asked you to come with him to the Quidditch world cup. Usually, seeing Quidditch with your boyfriend in some of the best seats in the stadium wouldn’t have been a concern but you knew you were going to have to meet Lucius. Thankfully, possibly due to your blood status, Lucius liked you and agreed you should date Draco. Narcissa was happy, as long as Draco was.

Once the Triwizard Tournament was announced you were regularly at Draco’s side to watch the competition, letting him complain about Potter and staying up late together to finished your homework. And of course, the yule ball, where Draco was the perfect gentleman and dancer you were sure his mother trained him to be.

That summer was the first time you’d visited the Manor and Narcissa promptly invited you to stay the whole summer, noticing how happy Draco was one night while you played hide-and-seek in the dark. And staying with the Malfoy’s was far more fun than you’d imagined it would be. Possibly you were too blinded by your love for Draco to notice Lucius absence and whatever strange was happening behind those big door of the dining room.

Arriving back at Hogwarts for your 5th year was like going back to reality from your dreamland with Draco, not a nice feeling. Then the rules started coming down hard and fast thanks to Umbridge. Thankfully as you were Draco’s girlfriend and Draco kept to the rules, Umbridge didn’t hate you. Of course, there were still quite a few late-night rendezvous in Draco’s dorm with a silencing charm.

Then the drama started and was over before you and the rest of the school knew the full story. Draco’s whole demeanour changed and you watched him close up as his father was taken away. As Narcissa loved you and thought it would help Draco come to terms with what he needed to do, she invited you back to the Manor for summer.

And that is where you are now. Draco’s room. Fixing your eyes on the luxurious decor to avoid seeing his pale, drained face. Now you were sure there was nothing worse than seeing someone you loved losing themselves.

“You should go home.” Draco finally said, causing your eyes to snap back onto his. He was standing in the middle of the room, pacing, as you sat on the bed.

All you could manage was shaking your head. “Draco Malfoy.” You began, standing up and taking a step over to him. “I love you so, so, so much and I am not going to let you fall into the trap of thinking you’re like your father. And there is no chance I’m leaving.”

“But what if I am, Y/n. How do you know?” He was stressed out, so drained it looked like he hadn’t slept or eaten in a week.

You knew because no matter what he did you would love him, forever. “Draco, I’ve known you weren’t like him since I saw Lucius bullying Ginny Weasley when we were second years.” You reached your hands out to him to make him stop the mindless walking. “We’re all products of our system and your system was a bad one, he’s been talking this into you since you were born and I know you don’t have to do this. Look me in the eyes and tell me you want to do this.”

Draco’s face softened, slightly. His jaw rested slightly and he stopped looking around anxiously. “I don’t. But I have to.”

“I know.” You told him as you pulled him down to place a kiss on his cheek. “Your place at the moment is out there with them.” You nodded to the door.

“No, my place will never be anywhere but your side.” Draco frowned, looking unhappy.

You looked at him with a frown. “Draco, I know but for now I think the best move to make is keeping your head down and doing what you need to until this is all over.”

He looked defeated but you weren’t sure if it was because of your words or his day. “Can we just cuddle now?” He asked, with that sweet smile you had missed.

“Yes, whatever you need.” You told him as you pulled him onto the bed. He toppled on top of you, finally letting the muscles in his body relax as you embarrassed him.

He was quick to fall asleep, on your chest as you ran your hands through his blonde locks. It was the best (and only) sleep he’d gotten in weeks.

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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 4 years ago

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You wrote your opinions on the Order of the Phoenix, what about the Death Eaters? That's another way of saying Lucius, Bellatrix, and anybody else. I honestly feel that we're running out of HP characters for you to write your opinion and reasoning about, so yeah~

We honestly are. When people start asking me questions about Harry’s nameless and faceless classmates I feel like we’re scraping the bottom of my barrel of Harry Potter opinions.

Though, that said, this is still a very large ask if you want me to analyze very Death Eater ever or even the Death Eaters as a whole (which is worthy of its own post).

So, we’ll compromise, and I’ll just look at the two you name dropped.

Lucius Malfoy

To me, Lucius is by far one of the more intelligent Death Eaters. He’s the guy who makes them almost look classy. I say almost, because Lucius is still a racist domestic terrorist and as the series goes on Tom gleefully drags him into being less classy by the minute (his house becomes a POW camp and housing for the dregs of society, Lucius just sobs, trying to be thankful he’s somehow still alive).

Lucius is rich, sophisticated, and is probably the most politically powerful man in the country. He has a beautiful wife he has... a son (sorry Draco, but you do not live up to your father) the guy has it all.

Which makes it very surprising that he got dragged into this mess. But you see, Lucius is paying for that tragedy we call youth.

Also, as a caveat, I’m about to headcanon hard and will not bother to get into the details of why I think x, y, or z in this post.

Ten years prior to the start of canon, Lucius is a very young man, probably very charismatic, certainly believes he’s intelligent and probably gets decent grades, but nonetheless the kind of stupid you see in men ages 15-25.

He’s likely chafing under his aging father’s strict guidance, knows he’s not going to be Lord Malfoy for years yet, wants to get out there, prove himself, and make a difference for his country. More importantly for Lucius, there’s this hip, exciting, new thing that all his cousins and friends are getting into called “The Death Eaters” (yes, I don’t believe the Knights of Walpurgis/Death Eaters 1.0 ever happened, I think it’s ridiculous that fandom and JKR does, I could go into why but not in this post).

The Death Eaters are led by the single handedly most beautiful, charismatic, man in Britain. (Yes, I headcanon Tom’s still blindingly attractive at this stage, because it makes much more sense to me but we’re not getting into that here.) A mysterious man by the name of Voldemort, Salazar Slytherin’s long lost heir, who has come to resurrect the wizarding world’s true heritage and purge the land of the muggle stain. (Yes, I do believe that no one, not even Lucius who is later given the diary, knew who Tom really was. I believe Regulus’ had only the vaguest idea, informed mostly by Tom’s use of Kreacher to place the locket.) This is the most exciting thing to have ever happened, the rallies probably consist of rich kids drunk out of their minds and maybe even high on a little wizard cocaine, and Lucius is down for it precisely because his father says “Lucius, this is stupid, please don’t embarrass the family.” WELL LUCIUS IS GOING TO EMBARRASS THE FAMILY, DAD! WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?!

And for a while, it looks like Lucius made the right choice. Things are happening, they’re actually going out and killing the mudbloods! Unlike Regulus, Lucius never has that “wait a minute” moment as he realizes that Voldemort’s actually far more efficiently eliminating pureblood families and sowing dissention in what was once a unanimous force among the Wizengamot (the other pureblood lords aren’t necessarily pro muggleborn, per se, but they get a bit queasy at the thought of blowing them up or Merlin forbid actually blowing up their own public venues wizards use).

And then October 31st, 1981 happens, and it all comes crashing down. Lucius has to desperately lie his ass off, having only the flimsiest lie to rely on, has to hand out a shit ton of bribes, and manages to squeeze his way out of being imprisoned in Azkaban.

I’m sure Abraxas looked at his son, with his tattoo on his arm that makes him another man’s slave, at the utter destruction of the Black family, and just shook his head going, “Clean up your mess, Dumbass Son”

And Lucius does to the best of his ability. While some will always suspect him of being a Death Eater, while some know it, he’s able to climb very high in influence in their ridiculously tiny community. Granted, I do think he messed up, and could never for example run for minister given everything (if Crouch can’t rerun then Lucius certainly can’t). He also shows us that in some ways he is not above the law, he’s very afraid his house will be searched without warrant in The Chamber of Secrets, and this is in part why he dumps Tom Riddle’s diary off onto Ginny.

However, he wields total control of the Prophet, has a seat on the Wizengamot, has the ear of the current Minister, is on the Hogwarts’ Board of Governors, and has his hands in pretty much every pie he can.

I imagine during this period Lucius grows up. He brushes the indiscretions of his youth under the carpet, gleefully leaving it all behind him, and the only real friend he maintains contact with from that period is Severus, the least zealot like of all of them. (Crabbe and Goyle Sr aren’t friends, they’re minions).

Don’t get me wrong, he’s still a racist slime bag, and I don’t think he really regrets the domestic terrorism. He just regrets nearly getting caught and putting his entire family’s security on the line. He witnessed first hand what happened to the Blacks.

And then the worst thing happens: Tom Riddle rises from the dead. He rises, impossibly, from the dead when Lucius has his own hand caught in the cookie jar.

Lucius has been living a life of luxury and influence while his great master, the man he had pledged everything to, was dead. Worse, Lucius took what was described as a treasured item to be protected at all costs, and not only threw it away but sent it to Hogwarts where it caused massive havoc and was ultimately destroyed.

And Lucius, I imagine, no longer wants to serve a master.

But he has no choice. And so begins Lucius’ descent into misery and hell as he’s given an increasing set of impossible, horrific, tasks in punishment that involve him watching as his wife and son are put through hell.

I believe Tom holds a special place in his cold, black, passive aggressive heart for Lucius Malfoy.

First, Tom makes Lucius’ house his headquarters. Oh, Lucius, you have a very nice, very large, estate? Why don’t you host your beloved, mad, cousin, her equally mad husband and brother-in-law? Oh, Bellatrix threatened to cut off your ear? Well, she’s just so passionate!

Second, Lucius is told to go get the prophecy. Well, this is easier said than done. He nearly succeeds but then it all turns into the world’s largest clusterfuck that ends in two notable things. First, the prophecy is lost forever, shattered. Second, the government admits that Voldemort is truly resurrected. Both of these things are very bad in Tom’s book. And the blame can easily be put on Lucius’ head.

In response to this, Draco is now given an impossible task that Draco is too stupid to realize is designed to cause him (and his family) as much misery as possible. Draco is to assassinate Dumbledore.

Likely, Tom was already informed by Snape that Dumbledore was dying. The blackened hand was too obvious a tell coming from too obvious a source for the pair to have hid it. I think trying to hide such information would have immediately blown Snape’s cover. So, Tom knows the man is dying, and doesn’t see fit to tell Draco this.

Instead, he tells Draco, “Kill Dumbledore as soon as possible or I deliver you to Fenrir Grayback.” Draco, however, is young and stupid, so he honestly thinks he is doing this to restore the family honor, earn glory for himself and for the cause, and is expected to do this entirely by himself. As a result, when Narcissa begs Snape to aid Draco, Draco blows them both off and only accepts help from Bellatrix because HE CAN DO THIS ON HIS OWN! DRACO IS A MAN.

This, of course, doesn’t work out either. Draco doesn’t deliver the killing blow, Snape does, but Tom decides to give him a pass.

Instead he moves on to his next plan which is making the Malfoy manor his torture chamber and POW camp. Even Draco, at this point, realizes this all kind of sucks.

And then Voldemort finally dies a second time, and I’m sure Lucius just stares numbly at his malformed corpse, wondering if it will really take this time.

So that’s Lucius for you, paying always for his mistakes, and pretending he’s just as much of a nutcase as Bellatrix to fit in.

Bellatrix LeStrange

God, compared to the novel that is Lucius’ ridiculous life, I really don’t have much to say about her because I feel like there’s not much too her.

Bellatrix reminds me a lot of the Manson family, she gives off those same vibes. Point being, I think even before Azkaban (while Azkaban certainly didn’t help), she was insane and a little too worshipful of Voldemort.

I guess I can start there, I don’t think Bellamort is a thing, at all.

Tom may have, probably did, have sex with her before he died but afterwards? In that body? Forget about it.

That said, I’m sure Bellatrix both wanted to have sex and is convinced she did have sex to produce whatever the hell Delphi even is. It just wasn’t with Tom, and probably was Rodolphous with a Halloween mask on his face as they got a little too into role play.

And there we go, I suppose, I can’t take Bellatrix seriously. You often see her portrayed as sexy femme fatale Death Eater, the most competent of all of them, if a bit of a sadist.

Oh she might be a very good duelist but she’s... Bellatrix.

She prances around in corsets, shrieking madly, and just what part of that is supposed to be femme fatale? I literally cannot take her seriously on any level. When I even try to write her seriously, in very serious stories, I end up with lines like the following:

"My lord, if there's anything you need… Anything from me, specifically, as a woman…"

- Bright Eyes

That was my best attempt. That was the best I could come up with. It’s still something that belongs in a comedy.

So, I don’t think Tom really corrupted her. I think without Voldemort she still probably would have been blowing up Diagon Alley, just in a much less organized manner.

Even in canon she does ridiculous things. For example, Bellatrix, frankly, could have easily avoided prison.

For weeks after the dark lord fell neither she, her husband, Barty, nor her brother-in-law were arrested. Bellatrix in grief and utter disbelief that the dark lord could ever do something so mortal as die, said “remember that other house our lord mentioned, THEY MIGHT HAVE INFORMATION, LET’S GO MURDER THE LONGBOTTOMS!” They torture and kidnap Frank, demanding he tell them where their master is, THEY KNOW HE KNOWS. He doesn’t know. They go too far and torture the man into being a vegetable. “Shit, GET THE WIFE!” They go get the wife, do the same thing, with the same results.

They now have no information on the dark lord, two well regarded aurors tortured into brain damage, and are quickly caught and brought before the court with absolutely no “I was imperiused” excuse they can give out.

How am I supposed to take her in any way seriously?

I mean, to end your life killed in a duel with Molly Weasley. That just says it all.

#ask #anon

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writing-red · 4 years ago

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The Daughter of the Dog | 1

Fred Weasley x SirusBlacksDaughter!Reader

Summary: That fateful night that would wrongfully land him in Azkaban Sirius Black left his three-year-old daughter at the door of her godfather, Remus Lupin. Now as she enters her fifth year at Hogwarts she is a-fronted by her peers and their outward fear of her presence.

Warnings: bullying, cussing, slow burn relationship, bullying, asshole teachers (Snape.)

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N: If y’all like this I’ll continue on with this :)

chapter one, chapter two

“Remus you can’t make me go to school this year. Everyone there already hates me, and now that dad is all over the Daily Prophet, it’ll all just be worse,” you made your case to your godfather for the hundredth time this summer since your father had broken out of Azkaban.

“Y/n, you have friends who will have your back,” Remus said, he felt terrible, and he knew you were right, but he also knew how important it was for you to be at Hogwarts. “I’ll be there, and Dumbledore and McGonagall will make sure nothing happens.”

“Gryffindor’s aren’t as nice as you think they are,” you retorted. “And I do not have friends, that’s a joke. Everyone despises me, even some of my bloody professors hate me,” you were particularly referencing Snape who’d had it out for you since your name had been called for sorting your first year.

“That’s impossible, of course, you have friends, what about the twins?” he asked, and you ignored him. It was true that you were close with Fred and George, but you felt that virtually everyone other than those two Weasley’s hated you.

“I’m glad you, dad, and Uncle James were just so popular when you went to school, and everyone just bloody loved you, but it isn’t the same for me,” you said, finally deciding you were done with the argument and storming upstairs, you knew that Remus wasn’t going to budge about his decision, but you’d put up as much of a stink as you could, and being that September 1st was only a week away you figured your case had failed.

Remus let you storm out, you were fifteen, and he understood that you were going through a lot. Not only were you a teenager and dealing with all of the joys of puberty, but you were the daughter of an assumed murderer, which couldn’t make school much fun. He could only imagine the ways your peers used that to torment you. He couldn’t forget the minuscule things James and Sirius would agonize Severus Snape over when they had been in school. On top of all that, twelve years ago, your father had left you on Remus’ doorstep with a note on your forehead that read:

‘Peter rated out James and Lily, I’m going to Godrics Hollow, if anything happens, take care of Y/n, she doesn’t have anyone else.’

He was right, your mother had died at the hands of Lucius Malfoy before your first birthday, and her parents had died long ago, Sirius didn’t want you anywhere near his parents, neither Sirius nor your mother had living siblings, and Remus was your only named Godparent. You grew up with both of your parents, and all of your family ripped away from you. You had been left only with good memories of the man the world was trying to tell you was evil and a note you had used as evidence of his innocence.

Despite everything, Remus didn’t mind having you around in the least, you were a carbon copy of your parents, just an absolute firecracker, and he loved you just as much as your parents had. While he anticipated his situation to be a problem it wasn’t, as whenever necessary, Molly Weasley would take you in for however long Remus needed. However, your third year, you took a page out of your father’s book, and while at school, you learned how to become an animagus on your own, so that when you returned home that summer, you were able to stay with your godfather though all of his sessions, and help. Remus found as you grew up that you took care of him as much as he took care of you, he was eternally grateful to have you in his life. Now, with everything going on in your life and all the trauma you had ensued, he couldn’t blame you for lashing out. He just wished he could be of more help.

You didn’t argue with Remus about going to school again, and on August 31st, you begrudgingly packed up your trunk in anticipation of your journey to Hogwarts. You and Remus lived in a house you had inherited from your mother in Burford, West Oxfordshire, it was far enough outside town to be safe for Remus, and it was protected with old magic as it had been in your family for centuries. Being that it’s only over an hour-long drive to London, Remus usually drove you to King’s Cross, but since he was going with you to Hogwarts this year, you both took an early train to London, arriving in perfect time to catch the Hogwarts Express.

When you boarded the train, you split ways with Remus as you were due in the prefect compartment so that you could do your rounds. Prefect duty was another thing you were dreading this year, you were sure that no one would be willing to listen to you considering your situation, and you genuinely had no clue why Professor McGonagall wanted you as a prefect anyways.

During your round, you found that your assumptions were correct, no one would listen to you, and you only found yourself getting angry every time you noticed a copy of the Daily Prophet with your father’s mugshot on the cover. He hadn’t aided in the murder of your Uncle James and Aunt Lily, he hadn’t a reason to, James had been his best friend. Not only that, but nobody knew half the story you and Remus knew, but of course, no one wanted to listen to you, and the only evidence you had was the note he had left on your forehead, which was, of course, deemed unreliable. You were sure Peter was out there somewhere, and you were optimistic that if you could find him, you would be able to clear your father’s name, but you had no clue where you could start.

You past by the compartment Harry, Ron, and Hermione frequented to find your godfather sleeping in the corner, that man did love his naps, although you were curious why they had chosen to sit in a compartment with a sleeping professor in it, but you brushed it off. The three had a knack for making odd decisions that never failed to land them into trouble of some sort.

You continued walking down the corridor, keeping to yourself, not finding anyone to be breaking any severe rules. You had decided that as a prefect, your policy would be that if it wasn’t happening in front of you, you wouldn’t report it. After experiencing Percy Weasley’s tyrannical rain, the last thing you wanted was to subject other students to such tyranny. You remained in your thoughts till you passed by Draco Malfoy’s compartment, where the door was wide open.

“Oi! Black!” You heard Malfoy yell as you approached his compartment. “Surprised, they let you come this year considering your murderer father is loose.”

You elected to ignore him and continue walking, biting back the insults you wanted so badly to throw back.

“Or I guess you’re nothing like your father, more the chicken type like your pathetic moth-”

You swung around, resisting the urge the pull your wand out and land a nasty jinx on the prick, “You’re one to speak Malfoy, considering your father is a cowardly murderer who hides behind money and lies. Now, if you want to lose another twenty points from Slytherin before we even arrive at Hogwarts, I suggest you keep running your mouth,” you said without breaking a sweat, silence from Malfoy and his posse following. “I thought so,” you said before continuing on your round.

You made it to the end of the train and turned around to do your final walkthrough you intended to stop into the section Remus was in and see if he had awoken. As you walked down the corridor, you noted the cold fog that rolled alongside the train, the ride to Hogwarts was rarely this cold. As you approached the compartment door, the train came to a screeching halt, and you were thrown up against the door, startling its occupants. You hurried to your feet and entered as Harry Potter opened the door.

“What’s going on?” Ron Weasley asked. You stood back against the door as the lights in the train flickered out.

“I know just as much as you do,” you said, trying your best to push aside any fear.

From his seat, Harry was giving you a weird look. Meanwhile, Ron pressed himself against the window that had begun frosting.

“Ouch, Ron, that was my foot,” Hermione complained.

Ron ignored his clumsiness, concerned with whatever he saw outside the train, “There’s something moving out there.”

With that, the lights turned on and then off again, the train rocking and ice encapsulating the carriage. No longer trusting your own legs, you rushed to take a seat on the bench Harry and Remus were on, though you kept your distance, still grimly aware of the rumours that had been flying around the train regarding your father. Although, your thoughts were stopped as the train halted again, and your breath turned to ice.

“Bloody hell! What’s happening?” Ron cried.

All of your heads turned to the carriage’s door as a lanky robed creature with a hand like that of a skeleton’s slowly eased opened the door. As it approached, you could feel nothing but true sadness echo through your body and mind. It was a coldness you felt would never leave you. The thing you recognized as a dementor entered, looming off of the ground and ignoring everything but you and Harry. The dementor paused as if unsure of which one of you was worth its time. Discerning what was happening and uncertain of what else to do, you rose to your feet to act as a barrier between Harry and the dementor. As a result of your action, and your misery now clear to the creature, it started to feed off of you. At some point, you saw a blast of bright light, but the second it and the dementor disappeared, your fainted, falling to the floor.

“Y/n, Harry?” you heard Hermione’s voice as your eyes flickered open. “Professor are they going to be alright?”

You rose to a seated position to find yourself lying on the floor, Harry on the bench above you, Ron crunched in his corner, a very concerned Hermione Granger hovering over you, and Remus ready with a bit of chocolate as always.

“Here, eat this, it’ll help,” he said as he offered you and Harry the chocolate which you graciously took.

“What was that thing that came?” Harry asked.

“It was a dementor, one of the guards of Azkaban,” He explained to Harry before looking at you, “It’s gone now,” he assured before turning back to Harry to finish answering his question. “It was searching the train for Sirius Black.”

You swallowed your bite of the chocolate quite loudly, uncomfortable with the information at hand.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to have a little word with the driver,” Remus rose, leaving the chocolate bar with you. “Eat, you’ll feel better.” Remus assured Harry before leaving and heading to the front of the train.

You broke the chocolate bar in half and gave it to Harry, “It does help.”

“Harry fainted just after you did,” Hermione explained. You had quickly noticed before fainting that the dementor didn’t affect Ron or Hermione half as much as it had you and Harry.

“What exactly happened?” Harry asked as he took a bite of the chocolate.

“Well, after Y/n fainted, you went rigid, we thought you were having- well a fit or something,” Ron explained.

“Dementors feed on feelings of depression and despair,” you explained.

“Is that why-”

“You felt like you could never be happy again?” you finished Ron’s thought and nodded. “Exactly.”

“But someone was screaming,” Harry said, the memory alive in his eyes. “A woman.”

“No one was screaming, Harry,” said Hermione.

“I heard screaming too,” you said, looking over at him. A silence settled over the carriage once more, causing the reality of your parentage to come crashing over you yet again. You shakily rose to your feet, not exactly well just yet. “I should be going- prefect, duty- let me know if you need anything else.” And before anyone could protest, you were out of the compartment and walking back down the train corridor.

Before you could very much think about it, you entered Fred and George’s compartment, quite unsure of where else you might have been welcome.

“Y/n!” The twins chimed when you entered.

“Sit,” Fred started

“Yeah,” George said.

“We’ve got a question for you,” they finished together.

“A question, for me? Now, what would that be?” You asked as you squeezed onto the bench in between the two despite the empty one just across from you. Although, you assumed Lee Jordan had been sitting there and was just off to use the loo as his bag was up above that spot.

“We’ll show you, but you’ve got to promise us you won’t show anybody,” George said as he pulled something out of his pocket.

“Anybody,” Fred echoed.

“I won’t show anybody, promise,” You spoke in the same playfully serious tone as the twins while George placed a blank piece of folded parchment onto your lap.

Fred placed the tip of his wand onto the map but caught your eye and held eye contact with you as he said, “I solemnly swear I am up to no good,” winking at you as he finished.

Before you maroon lines and lettering unfurled, curling onto the parchment.

‘The Marauders Map’

A smile found its way onto your face as you realized what was before you. Your eyes lighting up as they followed the script that started to write out names you recognized instantly.

‘Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot & Prongs are proud to present,’

Your smile widened, you knew exactly what this was. Remus had told you plenty of stories of his and your fathers’ school antics, and the Marauders Map was often mentioned.

“Now, Black,” said George.

“That smile seems to say something,” said Fred.

“We’ve got a feeling,” they continued in unison. “That you know who created this masterpiece.”

You looked up at the two of them, your smile not at all lost. “What’s it to you?” you asked. Of course, you knew, but you loved messing around with them.

“Pure curiosity,” Fred smirked.

“Even if I do know who Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs are, why should I tell you two?” You asked.

“Because you looove Fred,” George said, and you shot him a glare that easily could have killed him right where he sat. “Because we’re your favorite people at Hogwarts?” He said, quick to edit his sentence.

“Alright, but I want you to let me in on all of your pranks this year. Think about the benefits of having a prefect on your side,” you said, then smoothly leaning forward to allow the twins to deliberate in peace. They caught on in a matter of seconds.

“She’s not wrong,” started Fred, and he rested back against the seat.

“And she’s quite smart,” continued George, following his twin.

“And she has information we want.”

“And you do love her,” George teased his twin.

“And we can trust her,” Fred added in an attempt to ignore George’s jab at his long-standing crush.

“Alright then,” the twins said in harmony, and you all resumed your previous positions. “Who is it?” They asked you.

“Peter Pettigrew,” you started. “Remus Lupin, James Potter,” they breathed in, obviously not having expected to hear the name of Harry’s dad. “And Sirius Black.” You said, your chest swelling with pride.

“Your dad!” started Fred excitedly

“Was a marauder?” They asked at once, and you nodded.

“Well, that makes you pranking royalty,” George said and mocked a bow.

“I would say it does, now I am excited to be working with you two gentlemen this year.”

“We are honored to be in your presence, oh Queen of the Pranks,” Fred got off of his seat and turned to give you a proper bow, prompting another giggle from you, which you didn’t notice Fred blush bright red.

“Boys we have some work to do,” you said, offering your hand as you had seen Queens do before to Fred. He took your hand and gently placed a kiss on it, this time causing a soft blush to rise to your cheeks.

Your train ride continued to be full of playful banter between the four of you, the boys full of questions about your dad’s time at Hogwarts, and you were excited to answer them as best you could. Although in the end, you couldn’t help but be entirely grateful that Fred and George hadn’t written you off along with the rest of the school, even more thankful that they hadn’t also written off your dad. When you arrived at the school, you shared a carriage with the twins, Lee Jordan, and Angelina Johnson, none of whom seemed bothered by your presence. It appeared for the moment that this year wouldn’t be too bad. You expected to resume your spot on the quidditch team as a chaser along with those before you, and the pranks you had already begun planning with the twins occupied your mind.

“Welcome! Welcome to another year at Hogwarts!” Dumbledore caught the school’s attention as he assumed his place at the post at the top of the hall. “I have a few things to say before we become befuddled by our excellent feast. First, I’m pleased to welcome Professor R. J. Lupin, who has kindly consented to fill the post of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Good luck, you, Professor.”

At this, the twins turned their eyes from Dumbledore to you, clearly asking if that was the Lupin you had said to be Moony of the Marauders, to which you confirmed with one nod.

“Wicked,” they said in unison, and you winked at them.

“As some of you may know, Professor Kettleburn, our Care of Magical Creatures teacher for many years, has decided to retire in order to spend more time with his remaining limbs. Fortunately, I’m delighted to announce that his place will be taken by none other than our own Rubeus Hagrid!”

You, along with few others who knew and appreciated Hagrid, applauded at this news as Hagrid rose from his seat and jovially waved at the school, although he nearly toppled the staff table, sending goblets over the side of the table.

“Finally, on a more disquieting note, at the request of the Ministry of Magic Hogwarts will, until further notice, play host to the Dementors of Azkaban. Now, whilst I’ve been assured until such a time as Sirius Black is captured.”

Whispers filled the Great Hall as you swallowed the nerves that rose in your throat as best you could

“Well we’ve got his daughter right over there. Why don’t we just give ’em her! She’s probably a murderer herself!” You heard a boy from the Slytherin table yell quite violently. His idea was supported by a few cheers from those around him and a girl who was sitting next to him following up.

“Yeah, how are we supposed to know she isn’t scheming to sneak in her murderous father to kill us all!” The girl yelled, and you could only feel yourself sinking into the bench as every Hogwarts student’s eyes were now on you.

“Oi! Pucey, watch it, or I’ll hex your ear off!” George quickly stood and yelled in your defense.

“That! Is quite enough!” Dumbledore boomed. “I will not have Miss Black questioned or judged for her being here. Anyone who wishes to contest this may bring it up directly with me.”

With that, Dumbledore continued on with his speech in particular regard to the presence of the dementors, but his words respecting you did nothing to ease the anxiety boiling in the pit of your stomach. At this point, you were wondering why you hadn’t followed in your mum’s steps and gone to Beauxbatons.

“Are you alright?” Fred asked, noting the color that had drained from your face.

“I’m fine,” you muttered.

Fred could tell you weren’t fine, and why should you be? He could feel the hostile looks coming from every corner of the room, some even coming from the professor’s table. He wanted to help in any way he could, and he knew that the most he could do is have your back for the time being.

When Dumbledore finally called this year’s feast to an end, you rose to your feet as Percy had asked you and Robert Greene, the other fifth year Gryffindor prefect, to walk the first years back to the common room.

You rose to your feet, “Your darling brother has decided I’ll be escorting the first years back to the common room, so I’ll see you back there after?” You honestly did not want to be left alone tonight and was hoping to spend more time with the twins.

“We’ll find a good spot by the fire,” George said, and you smiled at him, grateful.

You left and rounded up the first years, some of whom had no clue who you were and some who were clearly afraid of you and clung to the front of the line where Percy and Robert were. But you brushed it off. It wasn’t half as bad as Pucey calling you a murderer in front of the entire school. The walk didn’t last long, and Percy capitalized the whole thing to flaunt his power over the eleven-year-olds allowing you to remain silent and with your thoughts. You split when you made it to the common room, sure that Percy was so wrapped up in his spiel that he wouldn’t miss you.

“Black!” George wailed. “We’ve missed you dearly.”

“How could you dare to leave us for so long?” Fred cried, and you giggled at their antics, sitting on the couch next to Fred.

“I’m very, incredibly, sorry for the time I have spent away but do know that you were each on my heart and in my thoughts the entire time we were apart,” you joined in, causing Fred to laugh, which brought a shade of pink to your cheeks, recently you found how his laugh made the butterflies in your stomach ruffle their wings.

“Anyone else wanna know why Dumbledore’s let a murderer’s daughter live in our dorm?” you heard Seamus Finnigan say loudly enough for the entire common room to hear. “It makes me feel unsafe I don’t know about you.”

“Yeah if he comes to Hogwarts, this’ll be the first place he comes.”

You sharply rose to your feet and turned to face Finnigan, “Actually you’re right Finnigan, I’ve been in contact with my dad, who has been in Azkaban my entire life, planning to come to a school and kill a bunch of children. I am so so bummed you’ve found out my plan. So everyone keeps an eye open while you’re sleeping. I might just appear over your bed in the middle of the night, ready to murder you.”

As you were speaking, Fred and George stood to defend you. Meanwhile, Seamus’s face fell white with fear at your words.

“Anyways aren’t you meant to be a Gryffindor, Finnigan, aren’t you meant to be brave? Because speaking behind people’s backs is about the most cowardly thing someone can do,” you said, anger rising in you. Although, you did not notice Professor McGonagall enter as you were talking.

“She deserves to be here just as much as the rest of you,” Fred boomed to the now silent common room.

“Good evening, everyone,” McGonagall cut in. “I was planning to come up tonight to ensure that Miss Black was being respected as a peer and as a prefect although that clearly hasn’t happened,” she said, shooting a look at Seamus Finnigan. “As she just said, it is expected that you as Gryffindors conduct yourselves with bravery and with understanding for your peers. Should any of you feel that you do not have to listen to or that you are above Y/n because of her parentage, you can come to me for a detention. I will not permit any intolerance of her presence. Is that understood?”

A few people started slowly nodding, causing the rest of your housemates to nod in understanding of what Professor McGonagall had to say.

“Good, now I will be taking ten points from our house for Mr. Finnigan’s comments,” a groan fell over the room, “You shall also be meeting me for detention in my office tomorrow night at seven. However, ten points to Miss Black and ten points to Mr. Weasley for standing up for oneself and for one’s friends.” With that, Professor McGonagall left, leaving the Gryffindors in silence.

“Go about your nights,” Percy called to the house, and everyone dispersed, although you heard the drama start to circulate, no matter what McGonagall said, you knew that you would never escape the judgement of your peers.

“Merlin, and classes haven’t even started yet,” you huffed as you collapsed back onto the couch next to Fred.

“We’ve got your back, Y/n,” Fred said as he put a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“Promise,” you implored.

“Promise,” he assured.

chapter two

#Sirius Black's daughter #au #fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fanfiction #Sirius Black #Harry Potter #harry potter au #daughter of the dog

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xx-thedarklord-xx · 4 years ago

Text

Marked Reality

Harry had never been one for following the rules. Whether that was petty spitefulness from constantly having to listen to the Dursley’s, he wasn’t sure. So, when Dumbledore wanted him to go through the Ministry fireplace after Sirius’ death, he didn’t listen.

What was the point?

If he went through, Harry knew he’d do something he’d regret. The leftover rage from Voldemort possessing him was just as strong as the crippling grief that tore apart his emotions. If he entered Dumbledore’s office things wouldn’t end well, he’d probably break something.

As Harry walked back through the Ministry, retracing his steps from earlier in the night, all he could see was Sirius falling through the veil. Guilt clawed at his throat with each passing second.

It was his fault. All his fault.

Sirius wouldn’t have been there if Harry hadn’t been stupid enough to fall for Voldemort’s tricks.

“You aren’t supposed to be in here.”

Harry’s head lifted automatically but his mind was elsewhere. He barely registered the words at all.

“Do I need to get my manager?” The man asked, nose lifted in the air in some kind of snub as he looked up and down at Harry’s torn, tattered and scorched robes.

“No,” Harry shook his head. Fighting was the last thing he felt like doing. He just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry, not argue with some snooty employee.

“I was just leaving.”

“See that you do.” The statement was accompanied by arms folded and narrowed eyes. It was a good thing the employee didn’t work in customer service.

On his way out, Harry paid more attention to his surroundings and noticed a display of glowing orbs. There was a glaringly large and ostentatious sign that read, ‘Do not touch’, which only made him that much more curious.

Each orb glowed brightly with different colours. Some were dark and cloudy while others glitched and stuttered into many different colours. There was one in particular that drew his attention; a small orb shoved into the corner, almost as an afterthought, changed colours so rapidly that Harry couldn’t decipher them all.

There was something about the orb that made Harry want to touch it, the sign be damned. But he had more self-discipline than that.

Just as he turned to walk away, a soft whisper had his head snapping back toward the display. What had previously been a rainbow of colours was now a swirling dark black. The whispers grew louder but no less inaudible than before. The desire to touch the orb was back but so was a sensibility warning him not to. Something wasn’t right about the orb, something sinister lurked below, he just knew it.

One step back. That’s all it took before the whispers changed. Harry froze, mind blanking as his mind was once again filled with the image of Sirius falling through the veil. Only the memory of the voices that only he could hear were loud… just as loud as the whispers coming from the orb. The exact same voices.

Sirius.

Was that it? Was the orb somehow connected to the veil?

His hands moved involuntarily, fingers closing the distance and ghosting near the glass surface but not quite touching.

A glance toward the sign coincided with a loud, “Don’t touch that!”

Too late. He never did like to follow the rules.

With a much stronger grip than intended, Harry held onto the orb as the world grew dark and his consciousness slipped into nothing. ——————- A hard poke to the face was the first thing he felt, but Harry’s energy had depleted to the point that he didn’t really mind the pain.

“Do you think he’s dead?”

The familiar drawl had his muscles freezing as his mind blanked.

“I would hope not,” the sound of Lucius’ voice angered him. He had thought the Ministry arrested Lucius. What was he doing free? “Who knows when the last time this place has been cleaned.”

“Who do you think he is?” Malfoy asked. “Kind of looks like a Muggle.”

What? What were they playing at?

“I’ve seen Muggles dress better.”

If it hadn’t been an insult directed at him, Harry might have snorted.

“Oi!” Another jab to his face. “Wake up.”

“Draco, where are your manors?”

“Sorry, father.” There was a small moment of silence before a harder jab to his face had Harry wanting to hex Malfoy. “Please wake up.”

That did cause him to snort as he opened his eyes, struggling to sit up.

“Oh,” Malfoy breathed, far too close to Harry’s face. “He’s pretty.”

Harry glared, unable to help it.

“What?” That didn’t sound like Malfoy at all. Was it really him?

Malfoy arched a brow. “Don’t know how to take a compliment? I could have called you an ugly cow but I didn’t, did I?”

Oh. Harry relaxed. That sounded a lot more like Malfoy.

“Draco,” Lucius chided. Which… that didn’t seem like him. “Be nice to strangers.”

“Strangers?” Harry shook his head. What on earth did that orb do?

Lucius’ brows arched. “Have we met? My apologies then.”

That did it. Whoever was in front of him was not Lucius. Harry scrambled to his feet, slowly backing away.

“Kind of hard to forget a spineless coward,” Harry said, aware of the way Malfoy withdrew his wand.

“What did you just say? Wait until my mother hears about this.”

“Your mother?” Harry asked, bewilderment making him nearly stumble over his feet. He turned around and headed for the exit, aware of Malfoy screaming after him, but he wasn’t paying attention, the urge to get out of there too strong to ignore.

He didn’t want to return to Hogwarts, didn’t want to have to face Dumbledore. Didn’t want to have the conversation that he knew was waiting for him. If he went there then it was all too final. Sirius would truly be dead, and that wasn’t something he was ready for. Not really sure it was something he would ever be ready for.

Despite the pain in his heart, Harry headed to the one place that would make it worse. Perhaps misery was what he needed.

-----------

With a hand raised, Harry stared at Grimmauld place. Did he really want to go in there? Face reality? Face an existence where Sirius was truly gone? Was anyone even there? Would Remus be there or was he at Hogwarts with Dumbledore?

As his knuckles made contact with the door, he wondered if there was a finality to the action. Would this be his last time here? What was the point of returning without Sirius? It’s not as if Kreacher’s presence was a defining factor.

When the door opened, Harry expected Remus or perhaps another member of the Order. What he didn’t expect to see was—

“Sirius?”

A tilted head, furrowed brows and an oddly misplaced smirk was his response.

“What--I don’t understand,” Harry’s words came out in a rush. “You were just at the Ministry. I saw you fall through the veil.”

With each word he spoke, Sirius’ brows rose higher and higher.

“If I had known you were here I would have come sooner.” He wasn’t sure anything was real. Nothing made sense. Was he even awake? Had the orb made him dream? Was everything a figment of his imagination?

“Now why would you want to do a silly thing like that?” Sirius asked, tone quiet but mocking in a way that made Harry shiver.

Something wasn’t right. Sirius seemed off.

As Sirius uncrossed his arms, the feeling not only intensified but grew tenfold. Because a familiar mark gleamed on Sirius’ arm. A mark that shouldn’t be there, that had never been there.

The Dark Mark.

#Drarry #Harry Potter #Draco Malfoy #Duhn Duhn Duhn #Thoughts?#I'm obsessed with this idea

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idgivehimroses · 4 years ago

Text

why draco and hermione would have been an AMAZING canon pairing (if written correctly/given the chance)

i am well aware that with the way the books are written, draco and hermione would never have been compatible because he’s incredibly prejudiced and just kinda mean and i wouldn’t want that for her. also romione is cute. HOWEVER, i think it is important to think about how amazing and heartbreaking a draco/hermione pairing could have been if draco had been given a proper redemption and character development. allow me to explain..

- now don’t get me wrong, it would not be simple at first. draco is a rich, sheltered, 11 year old boy raised by essentially racist parents. OF COURSE he’s going to show up to hogwarts hating muggleborns, he’s never been taught anything else.

- but imagine draco gets to hogwarts. and he’s been told his whole life that he’s superior. he has all this pressure from his father to be the best, and he’s trying is absolute hardest but despite his best efforts theres this one girl that always comes out on top. hermione granger.

- and to make matters worse, hermione granger is a muggleborn. a MUDBLOOD. the audacity. but imagine this causing a lightbulb to go off in little draco’s head. because if she’s supposed to be inferior, how is she the smartest witch in his year?

- so maybe he’d tease her a little at first. but then this turns into a bit of a competition. who can get the best grades, who can master spells the quickest etc. and despite all odds, the pair form an unlikely friendship. i also firmly believe that while harry and ron were wonderful friends to hermione, draco would be able to match her academically in a way that they couldn’t.

- and draco still has quite a bit of prejudice at this point. hermione constantly calls him out on it, and he insists that “he doesn’t mean her” when uses the term mudblood and things like that. but slowly he’s realizing that maybe everything that he was taught as a child isn’t as true as he once thought it to be.

- lucius instructing draco to choose someone suitable like pansy as his yule ball date, and he reluctantly agrees. however, once he sees hermione come down the stairs that night he can’t seem to pull his eyes away. that was the moment he knew he was screwed. he even pulls her for a dance that night, the picture of the pair on the dance floor in the prophet the next day serving as a big fuck you to his father lol

- “FORMER DEATHEATER LUCIUS MALFOY’S SON DANCES WITH HARRY POTTER’S MUGGLEBORN BEST FRIEND AT THE YULE BALL: Will the family’s long standing bloodline purity end with young Draco?”

- draco receiving a howler from his dad the morning after the headline posts, and him simply burning it without even allowing it to finish and squeezing hermione’s hand under the table

- draco standing up to his father, demanding to know why everything he was taught as a child were lies. him basically getting told he has to choose between his inheritance and hermione and he doesn’t even need to consider it.

- draco reluctantly being cordial harry and ron for the sake of hermione, and the three of them actually kind of getting along after a while.

- draco being the only slytherin to join dumbledore’s army (for hermione of course), but also because he wants nothing to do with his family’s beliefs anymore. there’s some hesitancy at first, but eventually everyone accepts him with open arms

- draco being shocked that people can be nice and want to be friends with you without something being in it for them.

- draco being invited to the burrow when his family refuses to let him come home for christmas and holidays anymore.

- draco actually having a support system his sixth year and hermione comforting him through his guilt when he watches his parents support a leader who basically wants the most important person in his life dead. lots of catharsis lol but essentially hermione reminding draco that his family and his past don’t define him and that he can create his own path and choose to become something better

- “you’re not them, draco.” “i very well could have been.” “but you’re not. you can’t blame yourself for their mistakes.” “don’t you understand, they’d torture you if given the chance. merlin, hermione, they’d might even kill you.” “maybe so. but they don’t matter to me. you do.”

- ron dating lavender legitimately because lavender just wanted to be loved and honestly without hermione in the picture they could have been cute.

- draco being worried sick when hermione is out hunting horcruxes, offering insider information to them whenever he can based on what he knows from his family.

- draco’s heart breaking when he sees hermione’s mudblood scar from bellatrix. “i’m so sorry i ever called you that. i’m so so sorry.”

- the two of them fighting side by side in the battle of hogwarts, her squeezing his hand and whispering “you’re okay” when his father beckons him over to the other side.

- the two of them basically living happily ever after and having adorable bushy haired blonde babies ��

- i mean COME ON it totally would have emphasized the idea that you can educate yourself and grow and have different beliefs than your parents/family. also that love is stronger than any prejudice and will win in the end. also i’m a hoe for star crossed lovers.

- basically i just wish my dude draco could have gotten the redemption and happy ending he deserved. he had so much potential as a character smh mans just needed a support system and someone to guide him he was so young

#harry potter #draco deserved better #draco x hermione #dramione #draco malfoy #hermione granger #ron weasley #draco #lucius malfoy #draco and hermione

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sorry-i-ship-drarry · 4 years ago

Text

14. A promise of forever

Prompt used - putting an arms around others waist | warning- hurt/comfort, fighting| draco and harry are set to marry each other without draco's parents blessings|

Harry was inexplicably thankful for kreacher's sudden appearance that he wanted to pick him and spin him in the room but following to the conduct he decided not to.

" shall kreacher bring master and his guest the desert now ?" He asked. Harry roamed his eyes around the table waiting for someone to at least drop a sign but when nobody gave any, he decided to just answer for everybody, after all they had been sitting on the table for the past 15 minutes with everyone almost done with eating

" you may bring it kreacher. Thank you" harry smiled at him

" kreacher lives to serve his master " kreacher bowed and left

" I think it was the best for everybody right..." Harry awkwardly said

" of course, you're always thinking of everyone else, don't you! I could've asked for desert If I wan-"

" enough father" draco snapped on side of harry. Harry immediately locked his fingers with draco under the table as to ask him to tone down.

" you dare speak like that to me " Lucius snapped angrily

" yes I do. He was only answering for you when nobody chose to " draco snapped back. Narcissa on Lucius' side lightly grasped Lucius's hand to maybe do the same harry was doing.

"I knew It was only a matter of time you disrespected me, I wouldn't be surprised if he have you under some bloody spell or potion, otherwise my son would've never talked to me like that " Lucius insulted draco. Harry felt draco clasp his hand tighter but he dared not to leave his hand. He wanted to interject but draco had Always made this clear, never to come between him and his father no matter how much he wanted to.

" why is it so hard for you to believe father that I love a man that I will marry who doesn't have me under any spell or potion. All we did was try to have one last nice dinner with you here before we got married but you have always defied of it, haven't you " draco now rose up, slamming his fist on the table leaving Harry's hands.

" he spent the entire day trying to help kreacher to make your favourite delicacies, your favourite food, he fucking fluffed the pillows 17 times. He did all of this for you but you don't even have enough decency to be nice to the man I've chosen to marry "

" you had to marry Astoria. You needed to but I'm sure he's filled your head with the whole non pure blood mania. You were born and raised to continue the malfoy's name, continue the pure blood line but my son, have chosen to marry a man.Do you even know how disgusting it is to everyone who see me. People will never accept you-"

" I don't care about the people. I don't care about the fucking pure blood mania , I don't care about continuing you wishes , I- don't- care- father. All I've done was always for your pleasure but for once when I want something of my own you frown upon, you disagree upon it. What kind of father does that ?" Draco voice had grown hoarse from the pain and all the yelling. Harry clasped the side of draco's pants to pull him down but when Lucius had stood up, he knew there was no way this was as going to end well.

" that's enough Draco, he's you father. All he's ever done is to make you happy " narcissa snapped on the other side

Draco laughed airily, " father you say , to keep me happy. A Father don't bloody get their son a damn mark and not just any mark , nobody get their son to become a fucking death Eater when he's 16. If he thought even a tiny bit about me being happy-"

" draco sit down" harry nervously stood next to draco to pull him down but he only went on

" he would've never bullied me into getting one. I cried to you, I begged you to not let me become one but you didn't care. You told me griffindors were the dirt of my shoe yet here I am the happiest I've ever been. You never ever were fucking there for me father, you never were. You never even came to any of my matches, let alone you didn't even come to my graduation day. You only did everything you ever did because it made you happy " a tear slipped down from draco's eyes but he didn't set back.

" If I hadn't fed you, you'd had never been alive draco. You are and will never be anything without me "Lucius angrily yelled

" yeah, I am everything without you. I am a goddamn potions master at a school and you know what your money didn't get me that " draco yelled back

" I don't care father if you agree upon my marriage anymore. I thought I wanted to but now I don't. All you've done the past months is gave me shit about me and my fiance and I will no longer have that-"

" then you are no son of mine "

" AND YOU ARE NO FATHER OF MINE "

And Lucius stormed out of there with narcissa. Draco fell back in his chair after he heard the door slammed shut, putting his face in his hands.

" love-" harry had only begun but draco had interrupted him

" not today harry. I need to be alone " draco replied almost trembling and then walked out of the room.

Kreacher appeared again " how was the dinner, master ?"

" disastrous but food was great kreacher" harry sighed and leaned back on his chair.

__________________________

" bloody hell " Ron exclaimed as he dropped all he collected in the grocery cart

" it was worse than a disaster Ron. It was worse than when I fought voldemort. And above all, draco didn't come out of the room all night after that. I only saw him in the morning before he left for work" harry said as they pushed the cart forward

" I knew Lucius was going to be hard on this one but this is just Blimey, that was harsh even for draco you know "

" I know " harry sighed.

" and I don't even know what to do, should I talk to him ? Or should I just let him vent without saying anything ? I don't know. This is just too complicated you know. Although a part of me knew they would never along on the whole marriage thing but this was far worse than anything I ever imagined. I've never seen Draco lose his temper in front of his father like that. I know he can be you know a bit out of control but this was new " harry explained as they walked into the cashier's and started Billing the items.

" I think you should talk to him, I mean if it were my mum or dad I would've wanted them to come to my wedding but it's hard to imagine them not being co-operative you know, they sort of Always get along. He needs you though. Out of everyone you're the only who would understand, think you should talk besides I think it'd be good for the marriage, you know the honesty and understanding "Ron said as he picked up the bills and the items into the bag, smiling at the cashier and walking out of the departmental store.

" that's Hermione talk" harry rolled his eyes but he knew Ron was right

" well you know being married to mione' have it's side effects. For example grocery shopping " Ron shrugged. Harry looked at Ron before be chuckled nodding.

Later harry decided to stick with Ron's words and talk to draco, so when he came back from work, after they had a peaceful dinner in silence and was clearing up the table so kreacher only had Washing to do, harry decided to talk..

" are you okay, draco ?"

" of course I am " Draco gave a small smile and went back to picking up the thing's

" no I mean babe are you really okay ?" Harry stopped him from collecting futher and made him face harry.

" I am fine really " he knew Draco was lying, he could read draco like an open book

"you can talk to me you know, it's fine. I understand what happened at the dinner " harry spoke softly

" what happened at the dinner was something yes but I'm fine alright, we don't have to talk about this " draco sighed

Harry knew he was going to regret this but he still went on

" look I know it's bothering you, I can see it. We've never not talked about things like this before and this was the most disastrous of all"

" thank you for enlightening me with that " Draco rolled his eyes crossing his arms in front of him

" no but draco we can't start a marriage like this. We have to be honest with each other, we are going to promise that to each other. It's not more than 2 weeks away and things will get really busy from tomorrow onwards with the whole wedding and I don't want this thing to keep hanging over your head " harry explained

" it won't okay -"

" draco, please just talk to me -"

" what do you want me to say then that it sucks ? The dinner sucked? The dinner was beyond disastrous ? What do you want me to say ? There is never going to be solution to this harry and it's high time you understood that" draco threw his hands in the air in pure exhaustion

" I understand the Dinner was disastrous -"

" do you harry? Really do you ? Because if I remember correctly, my father was the one yelling at me and insulting me but you were sitting there quietly like it was some tv show you could enjoy "

A weird look etched on Harry's face " I wasn't enjoying the damn dinner draco, I was as invested as you were and I didn't step in because it's between you and your father "

" right because I'm the only one who's marrying right ? You know what it doesn't even matter, this conversation is done " draco said sternly with hand movements

" no it's not. I didn't step in because you always tell me to not step in between you two-"

" well for once you could've stepped in, you knew it wasn't a normal fight. Sometimes you just have to understand on your own -"

" i can't read your fucking mind draco. When I did step in once you told me to not meddle in and now you're saying I should've. What are you even implying at , that I should just know by myself to know when to step in and when not to " Harry's voice raised unconsciously

" harry we're getting married for fucks sake, by now you should be able to understand when to and when not to, I can't baby feed you and tell you when to step in " draco snapped

" I'm marrying you, not assigning for a job draco. I can't control what the damned father of yours say " harry Snapped back

" just leave it harry-"

" no, we are having this conversation. You say we're getting married right so let's have the adult conversation. Tell me -"

" fine, want me to tell you what's bothering me, he disowned me harry. He yelled at me while my mother just sat there watching it and when she could've easily supported me she told me to talk to that man she called my father with respect. Do you even realise that we don't have their fucking blessing ? That I'm getting married in two weeks and I don't have a bloody blessing! Do you realise that my parents won't be at my damned wedding that we're spending so much on, that my father wouldn't walk me down the isle or that my parents wouldn't shed a single tear because they rejected the fucking invitation, do you realise what it's like growing upto to imagining what would it be like to have to marry someone you love and your parents' being proud of it but my parents are not. They've not only disrespected me but disowned,do you even know how that feels or its just Empty words-"

" I do know how that feels draco " harry said almost calmly but confused

" right as if, you would? Do you though really? You say understand everything but you can't understand this and you know why because you don't have a family or a father or a mother- fuck - "

" harry- I didn't -"

" yeah, you didn't mean it ? Say it go ahead" Harry's jaw clenched as tears formed in his eyes

" I'm didn't really harry " draco almost plead coming back to his senses

" you wouldn't had said it if you didn't mean it draco but you know what you're right. I don't have a a father or a mother but I do know I have a family, Ron, Hermione, they're my family and I thought you're too but they would never throw it in my face that I don't have one because they know they are my family but I suppose you don't feel like that. I don't think in all this time we've been together you've ever felt like I was your family so If you do ever feel like that draco then you can come and find me, otherwise don't " harry Snapped in tears and stormed out, abandoning a teary draco in the middle of the kitchen.

Draco soon understood how badly he had screwed up.

_________________________

" so you're still in a fight but the wedding's still on ?" Ron asked as he chewed on his lunch.

" I'm assuming the weddings still on since the event planner called this morning and asked if we still wanted lilies instead of orchids since draco had called her a while before that to confirm it" harry sighed staring at his food.

" but you've got to talk to him someday-"

" but he's the one-"

" Blimey harry I know he's the one who bought your parents up and he's wrong but I'm sure he's sorry. He did say he didn't mean it -"

" if he didn't, he wouldn't had said it " harry almost snapped

" mate no need to yell. We do a lot of things out of anger you know, like I said the same thing while we were on the run right and you casted a sectum semptra but never meant it. come on don't be a hypocrite. Couple's have fights you know and I'm sure you both have a lot to but work on it harry. You can't marry while you're mad at him, can you?" Ron raised his eyebrows at him.

Harry assessed his words, he was indeed right, he didn't wanted to marry draco while they were on a fight but it's almost been a week and the wedding was only one week away and draco hadn't even called to check upon him while he crashed at Ron's.

" but he hasn't contacted me yet, doesn't seems like he care " harry said exhausted

" I don't know why he have not yet but I am sure he will. You know it harry, the whole wedding is just upon your heads, you both are very busy with everything, I'm sure he wants you to tone down a little bit " Ron said as he packed his lunch after finishing

Harry looked at Ron for a moment, knowing he was right " what in Merlin's name have you been reading ?"

Ron chuckled at harry " it's mione harry. All her. Though she makes me watch some show about stuff like this "

" I'm pretty sure she is "Harry chuckled at Ron and soon they both left to resume with their work.

Turned out Ron was right, draco did eventually contacted harry 3 days before the wedding. They had gotten so busy in the last few days that harry had almost forgotten to meet draco and reached a bit later than the assigned time.

" fuck sorry, this whole thing have gotten so hectic, I completely lost track of time then Hermione had to remind me " harry said as he took of his jacket approaching draco who was standing behind the railings of the roof of an old stocks building in Burton street.

" tell me about it " draco chuckled as he took harry jacket and kept it along with his " I've put the warming charm by the way, don't want you rambling about how you're just cold and not freezing to death"

Harry chuckled and almost forgotten he had even been mad at Draco and let the words slip " I missed you "

Draco's features softened and kissed Harry's cheeks " I've missed you so much more and I'm sorry I didn't ask to meet earlier Bernie had been eating my head about the wedding"

" seriously ?! I mean she asked me at least 200 hundred times if I still wanted the white and green collection and if we're still on for lilies which by the way she yelled at me for,for changing it in last moment's so thanks to you "

Draco grinned at harry " yeah - I just - after that fight that I just feel terrible saying that about your parents' and you told me once before that your mother's name was lily and I thought it'd be nice to have a symbol of her presence. I thought you would have figured that out, you didn't apparently"

Harry's grin fell into something almost pained but with pleasure, he took draco's hands in his own and kissed his knuckles " thank you for that and I am sorry too you know about everything I said that night -"

" are you kidding ? I should be the one who should be sorry , you were only trying to get it out of my system and I yelled at you for that. It was terrible of me " draco sighed.

Harry smiled softly at Draco and leaned closer to cup his face " we're both sorry I guess.. welcome to Adult conversations "

Draco chuckled kissing the inside of Harry's hands " fuck I've missed you so much and you'd be surprised to know that kreacher was as arse to me because I fought with you. He deliberately made me eat treacle tart because of it " harry chuckled Shaking his head " he is a true.. well elf "

Draco smiled at Harry's choice of words for not calling kreacher servant, that's one of the immense amount of things he loved about harry.

" I'm still sorry " draco smiled

" me too "

And in unspoken words they had said plenty of things.

It was only on the night of wedding during the reception when to draco a miracle happened.

" how are they here?" He asked harry but he only shrugged.

Draco immediately hugged harry and slowly with him approached their parents sitting on one of the tables.

" you came ?" His voice almost broke

" well your father is a bit drunk but yes we are here. I wouldn't had missed it for the world honey. I know your father is a tough man to be with but I am and will always be by your side " narcissa gave draco a firm smile before she hugged them congratulations. Draco had immediately hugged back tearing up about them showing up and how much it meant to him right now.

In all the chaos of the wedding congratulations and talking, harry hadn't realised that draco had been gone for almost 20 minutes now. Harry had almost spent 10 minutes looking for draco when he found that draco was standing by the waters .

Harry slowly and carefully approached draco

" only draco Lucius Malfoy would be the groom to be missing on his own wedding " harry chuckled.

" you almost scared me there for a second " draco smiled as he offered harry his hand to take it, he did .

" looks beautiful doesn't it. The reflection" draco said pointing to the middle of the waters

" well this reflection is also very beautiful " harry pointed to the one much more nearer to them, it was draco's reflection

" are you always going to be this cheesy because if you are, I'm running away " draco chuckled

" hey you've already married me " harry chuckled as he now pulled draco much more closer to him and slowly kissed his forehead.

" thank you " draco mumbled softly pushing his hands Inside Harry's coat, crossing behind his back and resting his head over his chest.

" what for ?" Harry asked as he wrapped his arms around Draco's waists

" I know you bought them here " draco spoke softly still looking forward.

Harry smiled as he created more space for draco to fit his head into the crook of his neck " I knew how much it meant to you. I always understand draco, I always do. It took a bit of a yelling but it got them here and as for your father, I'm sure one day he'll come around "

" I know now" draco said after a few moments

" know what ?" Harry asked slightly looking at Draco. He tilted his head so he'd face harry

" that spending the rest of my life will never be a mistake and how you are really my family "

Harry smiled at Draco fondly, he too knew that spending the rest of his life with draco would never be a mistake, the difference though was, he Always knew that.

And then they softly kissed.

It was 19 years later when harry was seeing pictures from Ron's photo album he discovered the photo of harry and draco's wedding from the time they were by the river.

" hey, Ron how do you have this picture ?" He asked

Ron furrowed his eyebrows seeing it more carefully then as if something had clicked he responded " I think I got this from narcissa's album, think I had planned to give it to you someday but always forgotten. You can take it if you want "

" do you know who took it ?" Harry asked as he examined the beautiful picture of them kissing

" I think she said it was Lucius who took it" Ron simply replied shrugging and went back to flipping pages again.

And harry stared at the picture again, after 19 years of marriage he still kisses draco like he kissed on the day of the wedding by the river because in that one kiss they had promised each other a forever and now he knew what their forever looked like.

Requests open

Day 13- love is a choice | Day 15 - nobody can ever be you

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professorrw · 4 years ago

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All I Want, Remus Lupin Fanfiction

Chapter Ten

Warnings: eventual smut, death, violence, swearing, age gap, slight angst, major spoilers for Deathly Hallows

A/N: I hope you guys enjoyed this! If you did, like, comment, and reblog! If you would like to be added to my taglist (permanent or for this series) tell me and I’ll put you on there!

As you had guessed, the weather quickly became cold in the following months. You didn't know the exact date but it had to be around December. Things were the same between you and Lupin. Light flirtation sometimes, but just friendly chat for the most part. You were trying to ignore, or at least not mention, your growing feelings towards him. Sometimes when Remus wasn't paying attention you would watch and admire him.

You had not heard anything from Harry or Hermione so you assumed everything was going fine. It had been multiple months since your departure from the Burrow. It had also started snowing outside so you assumed it was nearly Christmas. This particular morning, the snow was packed thick and coming down heavily. There was no way you were going to be outside.

You decided to light a fire in the fireplace the miscellaneous chairs were gathered around. It gave the tent a very cozy atmosphere and made it feel like Christmas. "Good morning!" Remus greeted you. He was strangely cheerful even though the full moon was approaching. "Good morning. I thought I would make a fire because of all the snow. It's around Christmas time I believe."

"Yes, Christmas. Your first without your parents. How are you doing?"

"I'm... okay. It hurts but it is getting better. They didn't want me to dwell on their... death."

"I imagine they were very proud to have a daughter such as yourself," Lupin smiled.

"I would like to think so. What about your parents? You never speak of them."

"My mother died a few years ago and my father... I have not seen him in many years. I would not want to burden him with my condition."

"Remus you are no burden," you assured him.

"Well you may not think so but I do. There are many downsides to being what I am. Too many."

"Does it make it worse to be alone?" you asked.

"At times it was. But I was alone for a long time. I got used to it."

You nodded and went to fix breakfast, leaving Remus to his thoughts. You wanted to do something for Remus. But you weren't sure what. There was not much you could do or give him. Maybe you could convince Remus to let you go to a store and you could get him something.

That thought danced around in your head all day. You knew it was unlikely he would let you go anywhere by yourself. When you woke up the next morning you decided to ask him. "Remus. Can we go to a store? There is something I would like to do."

He eyed you suspiciously. "What is that you need to do?"

"I cannot tell you."

"You make a very compelling argument," he laughed.

"Please? I know it's dangerous but it's Christmas and we haven't left this tent in a while."

"Well... how about this, in a week or two, when the weather is cleared up and the full moon is over we can go somewhere."

"Alright then it's settled," you smiled.

It was a week and a half later when you finally left. You decided to go to a small town that was a few miles from the forest. It had a few muggle stores. Surely you would be able to find Remus something there. He asked you a few times what you were looking for but you wouldn't confess. You wanted his gift to be a surprise. The bookstore was the first place you decided to look.

You had Lupin wait outside for you, which made him very curious. You picked out a book of mysteries by a muggle writer. He enjoyed muggle stories. When you walked out he tried to ask what you bought but you hid the book in a bag and kept your mouth shut. Just a few doors down there was a clothing store that sold items similar to what Remus wore. You once again told him to stay outside. You found a nice sweater that you thought he would like and returned outside.

When you stepped outside you found that Remus was not there. You looked up and down the little street and didn't see him anywhere. A flood of relief came over you when he stepped out of a shop across from where you were standing.

"I thought you left me," you confessed on the walk outside of the town.

"I would never. I just wanted to look around."

"Did you see anything?"

"No not really."

You nodded and continued to walk side by side. Your thoughts drifted to your parents. They would be glad you were happy. They would like Remus. You liked him. There was no denying it. They would be ecstatic that you had found someone you liked and that Voldemort would possibly be defeated soon. Maybe you could tell Remus that. He didn't need to know all the details but you could trust him.

"Remus?"

"Yes Y/N?"

"What Harry and Hermione and Ron are doing... and what I will possibly be doing, it's to defeat Voldemort." Not a second after the word came out of your mouth there were three loud CRACKS! You immediately saw Fenrir Greyback. He had two other people with him. Why are they here? It definitely wasn't anything good.

You and Remus drew your wands pointing them at the men. You were too late, they already had their wands out and had stunned both of you. You fell to the ground and the men approached.

"What do we 'ave here? This one is in the Order. One of Dumbledore's. I don't know who this lovely lady is," one of the men said.

"I know this one," Fenrir said, pointing at Remus. "I bit 'im"

"Ohoho a werewolf too! The Dark Lord will be proud!" One of the men had gripped you by the arm and jerked you up. "What do we do with her?" the man asked.

"If she's with 'im she must be important. You two take 'er back. I'll deal with this one," Fenrir said looking at Remus.

"Alright. Ready?" the man holding you said to the other. The bigger man, the one not gripping your arm, nodded. With another CRACK you appeared at a mansion. It had a large gate right in the front.

"Hey! We got someone! Might be important!" the smaller of the two men yelled. The gate turned into a mouth-like shape and spoke, "Come in. It better be good." You couldn't mistake that voice. It was Lucius Malfoy's. Your parents despised him and so did you.

They pulled you into the manor, not even looking at you. It was large and dark. The two men dragged you all the way to a sitting room, where none other than Draco and Lucius Malfoy were. Draco avoided your eye and instead looked at the floor.

"You said she was important so who is she?" Lucius asked impatiently.

"Well we aren't sure. But she was with a member of the Order!"

"Really? How curious." Lucius got up from his velvet chair and walked over to you. He grabbed your chin and forced you to look up at him. "What's your name?"

"Y/N Y/L/N" you spat out.

"A Y/L/N. Fenrir killed your parents not too long ago. How dreadful. You're an orphan," he laughed. "Draco, do you know her?"

"I don't know father."

"Well get over here and take a look," Lucius ordered. Draco walked over and looked at you. He knew who you were. You were a Slytherin Prefect. He knew you were friends with Harry too. He was going to tell Lucius you would know something about Harry's whereabouts.

"I know her. She was in Slytherin. She's two years ahead of me." Draco said flatly. You were astounded. Why didn't he say you were friends with Potter? You weren't friends with Draco and you never spoke to him either.

"Anything else?"

"No father."

"Take her to the cellar then."

Draco looked at you. He looked sad. He hoisted you up by the arm and pulled along some stairs to what you assumed was the cellars. He opened the door to one of the cells and pushed you in then left.

Taglist: @bellamy1998 @sxsalvatore @ottjord @lina1945

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kerie-prince · 4 years ago

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We're Worlds Apart (8)

Draco Malfoy x American No-Maj!reader

series m.list | general m.list | previous chp

warnings: mentions of smoking, mentions of death

summary: Draco Malfoy is a pureblood wizard. Magic runs through his veins and has been since his birth. You're a Wiccan No-Maj; a non-magical being with ordinary blood through your veins, but practices what you call magick. And this very practice upsets your neighbor.

a/n: god, i had MAJOR writers block for this chapter. i almost got lost in the direction i wanted this series to go and i'm still figuring out a way on how to not let this drag out too long. i'm debating on adding this to wattpad but i don't know how to make aesthetically pleasing cover art so if anyone could teach a bitch how, lmk ✋🏼😩

(gif cred)

Blaise has been acting differently than usual. Not that you had too many complaints considering that you hardly knew him. Better words would be that from the short time you knew him, he started acting different. What was once two nights a week turned into him staying with you almost everyday.

It was kind of annoying, actually. He was here to see Draco, not some random person he just met.

One morning, he got up early and tried to make breakfast, but he had no idea how to work any of the muggle items so rather than your alarm on your bed stand you woke up to the smoke alarm.

You woke up feeling groggy but had a pleasant soreness on your inner thighs. Before you even brushed your hair or teeth, you rushed as much as you could to see what was going on in your house. When you stepped into your kitchen, your toaster was on fire and there was smoke everywhere. Blaise was just standing by it scratching his head. It woke you right up; you ran to your small laundry room and snatched the fire hydrant.

After you put the fire out, you turned to Blaise, “What the hell happened?”

“I guess now would be a bad time to ask you to make breakfast?” He didn't really show that he was sorry. Maybe on the inside he was, but would it kill him to show it? You rubbed the temple of your nose bridge to smooth out the growing headache. Now you have to buy a new toaster and make food for this man.

The bell rang through your house in the early morning. You set the fire hydrant on the counter and walked to the front door to see who it was that was outside. Probably, no, hopefully Theo coming to pick his best friend up to take him out to go anywhere else that wasn't your house.

Fate was decidedly not on your side today. The person that stood on your porch was none other than your mother. “Ma? What are you doing here?”

“Don’t be rude, baby,” she let herself in just like she used to walk into your room when you were younger living in her house. She looked around and had a scrunched up look. “Y/N, what is burning?”

Just when the situation couldn't get any worse, Blaise walked out to the living room also assuming Theo was here to see him. It donned on you now that Blaise was shirtless and his pajama silk bottoms were sitting dangerously low on his hips. You were glad that he was wearing underwear or else your mother would see more than she needed to.

Blaise stood shockingly still and wasn't sure what to do, so he just did the first thing that came to mind. “Hello, I'm Blaise. Nice to meet you,” he held his hand out for your mother to shake.

She stood with a look of horror on her face and kept her hands to her side. As if it was natural, she gave you a disapproving look before looking back at the man in your house. Blaise retracted his hand and looked at you, “I'll just be at Draco’s then.”

You nodded and stayed with your mother as he put on his shirt in your room and left. “Y/N… what are you doing?”

“I could ask you the same thing. Isn't it a long ride from Boston?” you sassed.

“Don't give me that. I wanted to come see you and… and I wanted to say that I’m sorry.” You could tell that it was really hard for her to say the last bit. “I shouldn't have acted the way I acted on Thanksgiving.”

“What happened, ma?” you asked with your arms crossed, “I know it's not because of Stephanie also practicing Wicca. And if it is, then I really don't understand.”

“I just… why are you still doing this? All of this? I get that you wanted to be closer to your grandmother so I let you do whatever you wanted–”

“You let me? You make it sound like this is some hobby!” you yelled.

“IT IS A HOBBY,” she animated with her arms, “Y/N, you are 26 years old. When are you going to move on?”

“This is ridiculous, I need you to leave,” you began to escort your mother out of your house. “No, I’m staying. This was my house–”

“No, it was Grandma’s house and now it’s mine. Goodbye, mother,” you closed the door in her face and turned against it to lean on your back. Your face was in your hands and you wanted to scream.

You checked the time on your oven and saw you still had 45 extra minutes to do whatever you wanted before you had to get ready to open the store. Since Blaise has been over everyday and you haven't opened up to him about your practice, you wanted to spend extra time to soothe all the negative and stressful energy that was building up inside you.

The closet hadn't been opened in a few days and once you were facing all your herbs, crystals, and oils, you immediately felt better.

“It's been a while, girls,” you spoke to yourself. You grabbed some oils, a sage and crystals to get ready. And you had lots of work to do.

—

“Alright, you are good to go,” Draco released a child with their parents. Work has since died down since the huge fiasco earlier in the month. There was still the question as to who and why it all happened, but he decidedly let it go for now.

Recently, he's been getting closer with you with small chats every now and then since the day in Manhattan. Draco deemed you as now ‘okay’ in his book. Your chats were simple but not bad.

One thing that for sure was odd was Blaise suddenly staying there every night. He never got an explanation, nor has he ever asked him. Blaise was acting kind of strange, but Draco liked to think it was due to being homesick.

Thirteen hours had passed and Draco’s day would finally come to an end. Ian and Ashley asked him if he'd like to join them on a drink, but he declined. Theo called him and let him know that Blaise was home, so he was going to drink with the two of them. He had yet to introduce his work friends with his best friends and was planning to before they went back to London.

As he pulled up home, he saw you sitting alone on your porch. You had a stoic look on your face and had a cigarette in between your fingers. Draco didn't think you smoked at all. He has never seen you do it once in the months living next to you.

He figured he’d just be a good neighbor and say hello. He walked over and knocked on the wooden porch to gain your attention. You were pulled out of whatever thought you were in the middle of and looked at him. “Oh, hi,” you greeted without your usual enthusiasm.

Draco went through his coat pockets for his own pack and pulled one out. He then realized that he didn't have one of those muggle lighters and tried to figure out how to light his smoke without magic like he usually did.

To you, it seemed that he just forgot a lighter so you pulled out yours and gestured for Draco to come closer. He leaned in and accepted it, “I didn't know you smoked.”

You chuckled to yourself, “Yeah, I uh, quit a year ago.”

Draco raised an eyebrow, “You don't look like you quit.” He took a couple puffs of his cigarette and looked out on the street. You took a particularly long puff and slowly let the smoke out of your lips, “Well, when you have a mom like mine, you start up old habits again.”

“You’ve never met my father,” Draco commented under his breath, “She seemed nice when I met her.”

“She's nice to everyone but her own daughter,” you rolled your eyes. You let your cigarette out and almost started another one, but something stopped you. You leaned back into your chair and closed your eyes.

“Have you two always fought?” Draco asked. You kept at your position but opened your eyes. You gave it some thought before eventually nodding ‘yes’. “What about your father?”

The question seemed to have affected you; your eyes started getting glossy and your bottom lip quivered. Draco noticed. Should I not have asked that?

“He passed away when I was 12,” you sounded like your breath was cut short. Your hands reached up to cover your eyes and wipe away any tears before they could fall down.

As much as Draco and Lucius never saw eye to eye, he couldn't really imagine losing his father. Sure, Lucius was harsh on his son and always compared him to Potter, but Draco still cared about him. And he knew that Lucius loved him in his own way. Maybe you weren't all that different.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Draco consoled. You stood up to go inside. The weather was cold and your cashmere sweater wasn't doing you any good. “Thank you.” Draco let his cigarette out and told you ‘Good night’ before leaving.

Stepping down, he looked back and called for you, “Y/N.” You hadn't closed the door yet, so you looked back with your door held by your hand, waiting for whatever Draco had to say. “If you ever need to talk… I'm right next door.”

It surprised you to say the least. But it unexpectedly made you warm on the inside. “Thank you, Dray.” He nodded and waved before going home.

Inside, Theo sat on one of the chairs in the kitchen eating leftovers from the night before and Blaise was going through the Daily Prophet. “How was work?” the latter friend asked.

“Alright. Good to see you here for once,” Draco greeted. Blaise laughed without taking his eyes off the paper, “Can't a man be with his girlfriend before he leaves?”

“Ha, is that what you two are?” Theo teased from across the room with his mouth stuffed, “Look at Blaise; he finally settled down. Hell has officially frozen over.”

Blaise listed one hand to flip off Theo. Draco, however, felt a churn in his stomach. It was weird to hear Blaise call you his girlfriend. No one has gotten Blaise to call them that, but somehow you did it.

He wasn't really sure Blaise even knew what it meant to have a girlfriend, or even how to be a boyfriend. He never asked what they did knowing that he'd get endless teasing.

Draco grumbled to himself and went to his room. He changed into comfortable clothes and right when he was about to join Theo in the kitchen, he looked at his window for a moment. He peeked through his window and saw you through yours.

You sat on your bed with your legs up to your chest and your arms wrapped them close. Your face had no expression on it, but considering the conversation less than an hour ago, one could assume that you were sad.

“You fancy her, don't you?” Blaise surprised Draco, making the blond jump. “Merlin, Blaise, don't do that.”

“Well?” Blaise stood against the open door with arms and legs crossed. Draco rolled his eyes and walked towards the door, but Blaise didn't budge from his position. “I don't fancy anybody, now move.”

“I don't care if you do. But I do care when you lie to me. And yourself,” Blaise’s tone was threatening.

“Shouldn't you fancy her? She's your girlfriend,” Draco matched his tone. “Besides, if she was, shouldn't you be pissed if I did?”

“I do fancy her, but I'm not the one living next to her. Eventually, I'm leaving,” Blaise reminded his best friend. “So do us the favor and figure out whatever it is you want, or I'll find a reason to stay.” With that, Blaise left to his shared room and slammed the door.

What in Salazar is his deal? Draco thought. He walked up to his fridge and rummaged through all the containers of leftover food. I really need to learn how to cook.

Theo was still eating when he started talking, “Blaise has been pissy all day. What you reckon is his deal?”

“‘M gonna guess there's trouble in paradise and she's sick of him,” Draco jokes. His eyes land on the Chinese food from a couple nights ago and warms it up with his wand.

“Hm, as if,” Theo commented. He cleaned his mess up when he finished and turned to Draco. “Night, mate. Fingers crossed he doesn't yell at me and I have to sleep on the couch.”

“Night,” Draco replied and sat down on one of the high chairs. He thought a lot about you telling him about your father. He sat and wondered if you told Blaise. Maybe you even opened up to him about your… craft? Draco didn't know what to call it yet.

But he figured that if you did, Draco would be the first person Blaise would tell. And seeing as even Theo, the biggest mouth between the three, hasn't said anything, then that meant that you probably hadn't told Blaise.

And for a quick second, passing just as quickly as it came, he wondered if you would tell him first.

—

It was currently December 18th. Your dad's birthday. Usually you'd ride with your mother to his stone in Boston, but seeing as your latest argument was bothering you, staring at photos of him was going to be enough today.

You hardly remembered much about him since you were young, but you remember the good moments and some of the bad. The bad being the last of his days. His cancer was strong as it was caught too late by doctors.

The store was closed today per usual. You never had it opened on his birthday. Blaise was also at Draco's house. You'd ask him to have the day to yourself and when he asked why, you didn't explain.

Your door bell rang and you groaned, hoping it wasn't your mother again.

"Hey," your brother greeted you. "Y/B/N, hey. Come in, you're probably freezing." Inside, he took his jacket off and hung it on your coat rack. He sat on the couch and your cat ran to sit on his lap. "Sometimes, I think she likes you more than me," you chuckled as your brother gave her head strokes and she purred loudly.

"How come you're by yourself? We missed you today," your brother asked. You sat beside him and closed the photo book. "I didn't feel like fighting with mom again today."

"Y/N/N, I know she's hard to handle, but she needed you today," he reached out for your hand and squeezed it. "I needed you, too."

"Well, she has a funny way of showing it," you stared into nothing. You rested your head on his shoulder and wrapped your throw blanket over your shoulders. "Sometimes, I almost forget what he's like. His laugh, how he made Ma smile. How he smelled," you started.

Your brother was 8 when your dad died, so his memory was limited. But he still remembers how much he loved him. You both sat in silence, hands locked and the only sound being your cats purring.

"Mom told me you have a boyfriend. That true?" he asked.

"I don't know. Maybe? He hasn't said anything, and he leaves after New Years, so maybe not," you half-explained. What was Blaise to you? Did he feel anything when you were together? Was it just physical? You didn't know, and you never asked.

"Well, if he breaks your heart, I don't care where he lives. I'm beating his ass," your brother commented. You hit his shoulder and he laughed. "How's Steph? I haven't been able to call her," you asked.

"Oh. Um, we're taking a break." Your brother sounded sad. You sat up and looked at your baby brother. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I think Mom just spooked her. But I'll get her back," he sounded only partly sure of himself. You nodded and rested back on his shoulder. He stayed for a few hours; watched a movie and had dinner before he left back for Boston to see your mom once more.

When he left, you sat in your room and lit up some incense to calm your nerves. Out your window, Draco's curtains were closed as usual. Something inside you wanted to talk to someone that wasn't your brother, Blaise, or even Miranda and Bianca.

It wasn't that Draco wasn't the best of friends, but you had an indescribable pull towards him, and you wondered if it was the same for him.

—

next chp

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#draco malfoy #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy fluff #draco malfoy angst #draco malfoy au #draco malfoy x you #draco malfoy x muggle!reader #draco malfoy x y/n #draco malfoy x female reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy smut #draco malfoy series #draco x you #draco x y/n #draco x muggle!reader #draco x female reader #draco x reader

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pet-genius · 3 years ago

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Excerpt from an old fic - "The Snapes' Last Christmas"

Hogwarts, December, before the Christmas break, before the Courtyard scene, Severus’s 5th year

“Why do I hear rumours that you’re going to stay here over Christmas?” Lily asked Severus in mock-outrage.

“That depends, Lil. Is Potter leaving for Christmas?” He answered her with an earnest question.

“’Course he is,” she told him.

“Then I am staying. I’ll finally get some actual studying done in this place.”

“Oh, don’t be like that, Sev!” Lily pleaded with him. “Who wants to be at school over Christmas break? It’s time to be with family!”

Good one, Severus thought to himself. “You haven’t been to Christmas at our house, though, have you?”

Lily looked down. “I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I meant… Come home for me!”

For a change, refusing her came easy. “Why don’t you stay here?” He asked his friend.

“No way. My parents will kill me. And I miss the little Muggle town! Come on!”

Lily might have had something to miss over there; Severus did not. The only place worse than school was home, and with Potter gone, school wouldn't be that bad.

“Drop it, Lily, I’m not spending another Christmas with Tobias asking why I didn’t bring him anything from that good-for-nothing wanker wizarding town when he doesn’t send me any money. You have fun though.”

She looked hurt. “So that’s it? You’re leaving me alone with Petunia?” It was not a welcoming prospect.

“What about all your Muggle friends?” He asked her, not without a note of bitterness. “Why don’t you spend your break with them?”

That’s great, Lily thought to herself. He was just trying to make her beg him to come, and she knew it.

“Well, I can’t tell them about magic, for one. Two, my parents told everyone I’m going to some posh private boarding school, and we don’t learn any Muggle subjects here and all my friends will expect me to be clever and I will feel like an idiot. Three, they’ll all want to talk about movies and records, and I haven’t seen a movie or heard a record in ages. Don’t you miss it at all? The movies?”

She doesn’t get it, does she? “Hey Tobias, can I get some money to go to the movies with my freak witch friend, please? How do you expect this to work out, Lil?” She forgot, sometimes, how awful he was. Good for her, Severus thought. Then she suggested he use magic, as if he was stupid to not have thought of it before.

“You can try Summoning his wallet, the last time I tried that I was limping for a week.”

Lily started to look exasperated, or maybe Severus imagined it. “Then I’ll get my mum to buy you tickets. Come on, is this what this is about? Money? Because we can study at my house, you know, mum and dad will be pleased.”

Severus did not need her charity. He wasn’t the one so desperate to go to the movies.

“Just ask Potter to spend Christmas with you. He’ll fly his stupid Nimbus 1000 across the entire United Kingdom for you twice, I reckon.”

Why does he have to tease me about James? It’s not my fault he fancies me. It’s not like I like his stupid stunts.

“Maybe Malfoy will give you a couple of Sickles, if you don’t tell him it’s so that you can go to the movies with a big Mudblood!”

Why are we fighting? She is the one who came to me!

“I don’t think you’re a mudblood, Lily, stop it,” he told her. Besides, Lucius had been busy. The last time Lucius had written him was weeks ago, and even that letter was really short. Lucius had been learning fascinating magic, though, so who could blame him? Much more useful than the rubbish they were teaching Severus at Hogwarts, he reckoned. There was magic out there he could really use, and he could not wait to use it all on Tobias… on the glorified trolls that made it their job to make his life as miserable as possible…

Lily noticed he was no longer in the same conversation as her. “A knut for your thoughts?”

“Nothing, honest.”

“So you’ll come?” She asked him. “Please? Pretty please? We don’t have to go to the movies. We don’t have to do anything. I just want you home with me.” She looked at him with a devilish spark in her eyes and almost sung: “and it will drive Petunia crazy.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“Yes!” Lily exclaimed, and kissed him on the cheek. “I knew I could count on you!”

She ran off to join a group of giggling girls. Shocked, Severus remained where he was and touched his hot cheek. Currents ran up and down his body. Now he had to go. You’re good, Evans, he thought.

Spinner’s End, Christmas Eve, Severus’s fifth year

Of course, Tobias did not let Severus go to the Evanses for Christmas dinner. It'd been like that every year - a Christmas dinner with no decorations, with no guests, with his mother looking especially miserable (of course, this year he knew why). Every year, it was only the three Snapes sitting there while Tobias angrily barked at them to look happy. Not that he ever looked happy - he looked drunk. And mean.

“My own son wants to spend Christmas Eve with the redhead freak uptown and my own wife can’t be cheerful on this holy day to save her life.” Great, Tobias has something to say. He never shuts up.

“You know, they invited us. All of us. Even you. It was very nice of them, and it was very rude of us not to come,” Severus said. He knew his cheek would cost him, but he didn’t care.

“Rude, am I? They only invited us to show off their posh house, again, you idiot.” Just because they are not dirt poor does not make them “posh”, Severus thought. His father did not even know what posh was. But Severus did - he’d been to the Malfoy Manor.

“They invited us because Lily is my friend, Tobias!” Severus shouted - better go down for the dragon than for the egg.

“I am your father, Severus, your only father, and I certainly don’t want to spend Christmas with yet another abomination!” He waved his knife and fork ominously. “You and your useless mother are bad enough without that little pest running around my house, eating my food, stealing my belt. Don’t think I didn’t know about that, you wanker.”

Now he made Severus angry - well, angrier. “You don’t know anything, Tobias, she is a witch, not a common Muggle thief, she Vanished it!”

Tobias saw weakness, and he pounced. Even when drunk, he was good. An understanding smile spread across his revolting face. He looked like he just got his Christmas present. “She is too pretty for you, you know. She will outgrow you. I’ll bet the house she won’t know who you are by this time next year. She’ll vanish your knob before she comes near it. Pretty girls like her don’t go for gormless, ugly gits like you.”

Right where it hurts. He was that transparent, was he? And who was Tobias to call anyone else ugly? I hate you so much, Tobias.

“Do you ever shut up, Tobias? Or will you actually drop dead if you don’t shout at us? Can you not be a perfect arsehole for once in your life?”

They were nearly hook nose to hook nose, and there was nothing in either of their pairs of black eyes but hatred.

Tobias started undoing his new belt.

“Dinner is over,” he said with one of his special heinous smiles he saved just for his family, and as far as Severus was concerned, dinner could not end soon enough. Eileen hid her face behind her hands. “Don’t, Toby, please, I beg you. Let’s just eat,” she said. But since when did asking nicely get you anywhere in this house?

Severus was getting too big to kick around, but Eileen was getting smaller every year, if anything. Severus managed to run away with minimal damage, but his mother did not. She never even tried.

Moments later, Severus was in his mildewy room, listening to a symphony of plates breaking, Tobias shouting profanities, and the belt cracking.

Not one of your best ideas, Lily, he thought miserably, wondering if she was thinking about him at all.

He stayed awake, because he knew what was about to happen. Tobias would fall asleep and then he and his mother would finally have a moment of peace together. Since he was home, he figured he might as well ask her a few questions.

Sure enough, she quietly made her way to her son’s room as soon as Tobias started to snore.

“He’s a right bastard, you know that, right?” He asked her, as soon as she came in.

“You shouldn’t provoke him, Severus.” She struggled to make her way to his bed and sat with a wince. “I can’t help it, Mum. How can you let him treat you like that?”

“Never mind that now, love. Help your mum. You remember the healing spells you used last year, don’t you?” Severus nodded. “My clever boy. You’re a natural, you know.”

“Hmmm,” Severus grunted as he focused on performing the healing spells on his mother. He watched the swelling go down and the bruises melt away. There was a limit to what he could do with charms alone. If only he had some dittany or murtlap on him… Then you should have thought of that before you let Lily drag you into this miserable holiday.

Then his mother said, “All better. I’m glad you came home, Severus.”

“I ought to have fought him off you.”

“Don’t. I’m glad you didn’t. I’m proud of you. It hurts me more when he does it to you, you know that.”

She got up with effort; the bastard must have got her in places she didn’t want to let her son see.

“Are you going to go to a Muggle hospital, at least?”

“I don’t think so, no. I don’t like hospitals. I’ll be fine.”

He knew, he just knew, she was hiding something from him, and he’s had it. “Mum, I know why you can’t do magic.”

If she had any colour left in her face, she would have lost it there and then. “How?” She asked him, mortified.

“They have old Prophets at Hogwarts, you know.” She gulped. She remembered how the Prophet had told the story, and it was not good - ‘St. Mungo’s experimentalist Eileen Prince kills entire family on Christmas’, she believed, was the exact subtle wording they'd used.

“I’m sorry.” She said, choked up. “I should have told you sooner, Sevy, I’m sorry.”

There was only one thing Severus wanted to know. Well, two.

“If you did this, they deserved it. It’s just… how much worse can they be than him.” His head jerked in the direction of the snoring. “And why won’t you kill him, mum, I mean it.”

Her eyes were wet. Severus hadn’t seen her cry in years.

“They did not deserve it. They were wonderful. It was all my fault, Severus. I didn’t mean it.” She drew a laboured breath and wiped her eyes dry.

“Have you learned about Felix Felicis yet?” She asked him. The official curriculum hadn’t covered the lucky potion yet, but Severus knew what it was.

When she was done with her tale, her son understood everything.

*****

Sitting in the Headmaster’s office, Professor Severus Snape figured since it was almost Christmas, after all, he might as well use a Christmas memory to produce his Patronus. In his mind, he carefully avoided stepping on the landmines of memory that could extinguish even the strongest Patronus, and focused on Lily’s singing voice telling him that “it will drive Petunia crazy” and how she had kissed him on the cheek, and he sent the Doe Patronus to lead her son to the Sword.

#snape fic #snape #snape content #snape fanfiction #severus snape #young snape #snape love #let me know what you think?#i keep saying i'll republish this fic when I've fixed some issues but I never do #since i realized i could write AUs where he lives or something instead #sigh #but it always comes out angsty in the end :(#why #but please tell me what you think?

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dangerouslyallaboutdraco · 4 years ago

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Death Eater Draco

A/n: Set during the HBP with Death Eater Draco. Also, sorry, I will come up with a better title soon It was never how he imagined his life would turn out, you both knew that and it was blindingly obvious when anyone took a second to look at Draco as anything more than his father’s son. The summer you spent at Malfoy Manor after Lucius got sent to Azkaban wasn’t as much fun as the previous one when Narcissa had let you and Draco run wild around the house. No, that summer was spent stepping on eggshells around the woman whose husband was in the worst place one could imagine and trying to comfort Draco. You always saw a dark side in Lucius, at just 11 you were pretty sure that 11-year-old Draco hadn’t come to his conclusion about muggle-born by himself and when you finally saw Lucius in Flourish and Blotts being incredibly rude to an 11-year-old Ginny you confirmed your theory of this wicked man’s brainwashing. It wasn’t until third year that you really got close with Draco after you had to take him to the infirmary. Of course, by then you knew his very vocal position on people of different origin than him and yourself but there was a good side of him that you saw, even if it was buried under a mountain of horrible comments. As soon as you were allowed to leave to Hogsmeade on weekend trips you accompanied Draco and his friends and, although it took him a few long weeks, he eventually asked you out on a date and later that year to be his girlfriend. And it was good until summer came and Draco asked you to come with him to the Quidditch world cup. Usually, seeing Quidditch with your boyfriend in some of the best seats in the stadium wouldn’t have been a concern but you knew you were going to have to meet Lucius. Thankfully, possibly due to your blood status, Lucius liked you and agreed you should date Draco. Narcissa was happy, as long as Draco was. Once the Triwizard Tournament was announced you were regularly at Draco’s side to watch the competition, letting him complain about Potter and staying up late together to finished your homework. And of course, the yule ball, where Draco was the perfect gentleman and dancer you were sure his mother trained him to be. That summer was the first time you’d visited the Manor and Narcissa promptly invited you to stay the whole summer, noticing how happy Draco was one night while you played hide-and-seek in the dark. And staying with the Malfoy’s was far more fun than you’d imagined it would be. Possibly you were too blinded by your love for Draco to notice Lucius absence and whatever strange was happening behind those big door of the dining room. Arriving back at Hogwarts for your 5th year was like going back to reality from your dreamland with Draco, not a nice feeling. Then the rules started coming down hard and fast thanks to Umbridge. Thankfully as you were Draco’s girlfriend and Draco kept to the rules, Umbridge didn’t hate you. Of course, there were still quite a few late-night rendezvous in Draco’s dorm with a silencing charm. Then the drama started and was over before you and the rest of the school knew the full story. Draco’s whole demeanour changed and you watched him close up as his father was taken away. As Narcissa loved you and thought it would help Draco come to terms with what he needed to do, she invited you back to the Manor for summer. And that is where you are now. Draco’s room. Fixing your eyes on the luxurious decor to avoid seeing his pale, drained face. Now you were sure there was nothing worse than seeing someone you loved losing themselves. “You should go home.” Draco finally said, causing your eyes to snap back onto his. He was standing in the middle of the room, pacing, as you sat on the bed. All you could manage was shaking your head. “Draco Malfoy.” You began, standing up and taking a step over to him. “I love you so, so, so much and I am not going to let you fall into the trap of thinking you’re like your father.” You pick up his hand that he had crossed and held them in yours. He quickly pulled them away. “You don’t get it!” He very rarely raised his voice with you but this time something felt very real.

“Tell me then.” You say, shrugging. At this point, there wasn’t anything he could do to disappoint you.

With one look you knew something was really wrong, his whole face was ghost-like and he looked like he wanted to cry. You tugged on his hands and pulled him over to sit next to you on the bed.

“I... I’m not sure... how to say all of this.” He managed to get out between breaths. “I know you’d hate it so much if I end up like my father but I have to show you this because you’re the only person who can help me.” He rushed out the words quickly and your head started to spin about what could happen but Draco finally stopped it all when he rolled up his sleeve to show you.. His Dark Mark.

“Oh, Draco.” It was the only thing you could get out as you reached out to touch it. He pulled it away before you could, rolling down his sleeve to conceal it.

Your eyes snapped to his and the look of beyond horror was written on his face. His eyes had lost that spark they used to have, that shine that lit up when you laughed at his bad jokes or when you danced in the kitchen at night. Voldemort had taken that from him.

“How do you do it?” Suddenly there was anger in his voice, directed at you. Your face turned into a hurt expression that he read as confused. “How can you let me touch you with this.” He pulled up his sleeve to show you. “On my body?” He finished, pointing at the Dark Mark as he paced angry steps along the wooden floorboards.

“Because Draco.” You tell him, standing up and throwing your arms in front of you. “I love you.” He stopped quickly, turning to look at you. “I love you more than I could ever imagine loving anyone and there is nothing you could ever do that would make me not love you.” It was followed by an exasperated sigh, finally, you’d gotten everything you needed to out.

Draco took a few steps towards you, closing the gap between you before he took your face in his hands. His fingertips fanned out from your cheekbones to your jaw on both sides. Touching you so gently, and as if you were made of glass, he rubbed your cheeks.

“I am going to do everything I can to protect you, please don’t let yourself get dragged into this.” He told you gently, his voice was so soft.

“Draco, I don’t mind. If you’re in this then I am as well even if it’s not what I believe, you’re who I believe in.” There was definitely a tough line, of course, you didn’t believe the pureblood ideology that Voldemort did but if you had to fake it for the love of your life then you would.

“I’m 100% sure you’re who I’m going to marry.” His reply came.

“I am.” You confirm, smiling up at him softly. He leant forward, his lips hovering over yours for a second before he crashed them into yours, passionately but so softly. “Now let me see it.” You tell him once you’ve pulled apart.

With a sign, he rolled up his sleeve again and showed you the dark mark. It was incredibly detailed up close before it had only been a picture in the newspaper but now it was permanently on your boyfriend's skin.

It would have probably made a very nice muggle ‘tattoo’, something Hermione had told you about. Holding his wrist so he could pull away you run your finger along it.

Even as you touched it there was a hot sensation hitting your nerves. “Does it hurt?” You asked him, looking back up to see his eyes fixed on you.

There was a nod. “Burns sort of and itches.” He explained and you felt even worse for him. Leaning your lips down you placed a kiss on it, then another. He looked appreciative towards you and there was the smile you’d been missing.

“Now, you tired?”

As the summer continued the situation only worsened, with Draco’s crazy Aunt, Bellatrix, at the house all the time and Draco being in a lot of closed-door meetings.

You tried to keep your head down, staying in Draco’s room or in the garden but ‘family’ dinners were uncomfortable.

Finally, there came a night when you got to spend time together, Narcissa and Bellatrix were both out so the house was almost quiet.

Once they had left Draco rushed back up to his room, wanting to find you as soon as he could.

“Hey.” You said, smiling over at him while you close the book you were reading. All you wanted was to light a fire in his eyes for just a few long hours of the night, so he could remember being happy. Water drizzled down outside the Manor and you could see the whole grounds from the window seat you had.

There were slight tears in his eyes and they began to fall as he walked over to you. Quickly you were wrapping him in a hug as he rested his head on your shoulder, silently letting out tear after tear.

“What’s up?” You asked once he pulled his head off your shoulder.

“It was so hard today, I got my first task and I can’t even tell you what it is because there’s no way I’m going to be able to complete it.” He spits out, wiping angry tears off his cheeks with the back on his hand.

You took your thumb and ran it under his eye. “You don’t have to, baby, just when you’re ready.” That was all he needed to hear to make the rest of the evening slightly better.

Mornings were the hardest, getting Draco out of bed and convincing him to go downstairs and join the group of Death Eaters he didn’t want to be a part of.

“I just can’t.” He cried out, looking hopeless as you tried to pull him out of his room. That’s what broke your heart more than anything, your best friend and the love of your life in so much pain. Like a part of him was missing.

“You need to Draco, your place is a seat at that table.” You knew he didn’t want to hear it but even if he didn’t want it this is where your lives were.

“No, my place is by your side.” Without even trying he made you swoon.

You could feel the smile on your face. “I love you for that but please, Draco, we’re going to have a much better life after this is done. Just think about the future.”

“You know, with you, it doesn’t look so bleak.” He told you, placing a kiss on your lips before walking out the door and going to do what he needed to.

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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 4 years ago

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Lily Evans and Severus Snape: Headcanons

So, I was asked in the ask about Sirius and Regulus what I thought about Snape and Lily. At this point people are probably going, “Oh that Carnivorous Muffin is just clearly a Snape stan who thinks he could never do anything wrong and anyone who was slightly mean to him is evil.” Shockingly, I’m actually not, I just happen to think sexual harassment and attempted murder are bad and probably worse than JKR intended (I do think she was trying to go the “boys will be boys” route versus “oh my god, they just dumped pigs blood on Carrie at the prom and then threw her at a starving vampire”)

So let’s start on Snape.

First, Snape did live an incredibly shitty life, with circumstances beyond his control, that did lead to many of his poorer choices. In no way am I saying that it was alright for Snape to have grown up in an impoverished, abusive, household and endured years of humiliation and torment at school.

That said, I believe that we all, in some respects, are responsible for our actions and our decisions. Yes, even when we come from non-privileged backgrounds. Life is hard, some people will have it much easier than you, that doesn’t excuse you becoming a domestic terrorist or tormenting and terrifying your students, young children, so much so that an entire generation comes out with a loathing and incompetence in your subject.

I guess let’s start back on his friendship with Lily Evans. We get... a really weird perspective from Snape on that friendship. Time and her tragic death have warped it into this strange worship where I’m not sure the Lily Evans that exists in his mind and memory is the one that really was there. She’s this shining Madonna idol who he failed, actively betrayed, is very very hung up about it years later.

I suspect they weren’t as good of friends as either of them thought they were and it comes down to Snape’s resentment of his own upbringing and muggles. I believe Snape was very racist towards muggles, specifically, due to his father. It was his way of grappling with his home life and only fueled by being in Slytherin. Lily was probably, in his mind, always a golden exception to the rule (Lily is the token, gold standard, muggleborn where she’s pretty, brilliant, charming, etc.) That Severus himself was a halfblood clearly caused him some angst. What I’m getting at is that I believe throughout their entire friendship, especially when they got to Hogwarts, there was an unacknowledged undercurrent of intense racism that eventually boiled up with that one incident in Snape’s fifth year.

Calling her that, while he views it as a slip of the tongue that damned him for all time, I see it more as a Freudian Slip. That sort of thing doesn’t just slip out from nowhere, not at that age when they both knew exactly what that word meant, it simmers beneath the surface, and was ultimately what he thought of her. Later, she became the Madonna figure that he views her as today (ironically perhaps even less of a person than he viewed her as at the time).

That said I think a number of factors played into the young Snape becoming a Death Eater. One, becoming friends with Lucius/that crowd who were all being sucked into Tom’s influence. Two, having his terrible home life and all the implications of Snape resenting his own blood status as well as muggles and muggle borns at large. Three, the loss of friendship with Lily (now there’s nothing to hold him back anymore, he has no reason to preserve muggleborn life). Fourth, Dumbledore’s letting Sirius, James, and Remus entirely off the hook in the werewolf incident.

That last one, especially, I imagine cemented Snape’s utter hatred of ‘the light’ (don’t get me started on the stupidity of light/dark in Harry Potter but I guess I’ll use the term) and those that cater to muggleborns. They’re hypocrites of the highest order, Dumbledore claiming to defend the poor and non-nobility, when he goes and does the exact opposite (James is the next lord Potter, Sirius is still pureblooded even if disowned, Severus Snape is a dirt poor halfblood).

So what I’m saying is I understand why Snape did become a Death Eater, I do not condone this action. Especially as, unlike Regulus, Snape never gets cold feet. He loves being a Death Eater at first, he’s living the dream, getting all the revenge he ever wanted and burning the stupid wizarding world to the ground as he scrambles for ways to climb in Tom Riddle’s graces. We don’t see any hint that he was wavering, thinking of the fact that beloved Lily might die in battle, perhaps at his hand, until the prophecy.

Now, I’m a little kinder than some about the prophecy. We know Snape overhears the first portion of the prophecy in early 1980. He eagerly rushes to the dark lord, regales him with the prophecy in both a) aid to the cause and b) in the hopes of climbing in the ranks and gaining the dark lord’s notice. At this point, Lily Evans is pregnant, perhaps knows the gender, but has not given birth. Months later, when both Neville Longbottom and Harry Potter are born at the end of July, Snape realizes he has signed Lily Evans’ death warrant (because despite Dumbledore talking, I imagine Tom always planned to kill off both children, Pettigrew just happened to make things convenient for Tom to go to the Potters first).

With Lily’s death now so inevitable, and her blood on his own hands, Snape has his existential crisis, goes to Dumbledore who puts the Potters in hiding and becomes a double agent. Snape also pleads for Lily’s life with Tom and he puts in a minimal amount of effort to spare the woman.

Then Lily dies anyway and now Snape lives in the bitter cynicism most commonly seen in characters from Game of Thrones. He’s Dumbledore’s agent and sort of a Dirty Harry character, getting to see all the nasty things that many of the other order members never have to deal with. He’s one of the more intelligent characters in the series, able to see the truth of the world he lives in, but he also doesn’t care enough to actually do anything about it. He’s a bitter, resentful, and angry protector of Harry Potter, choosing to hate a naive child for all the reminders of his own terrible life (both in Lily, for failing and betraying her, and in James his most hated rival and tormentor). He gleefully enables the favoritism of Slytherin (my god how he panders to Draco Malfoy) while tormenting poor Neville into terror (that Neville’s greatest 13 year old fear is Snape is very telling).

Basically by the time we get to him in canon Snape not only isn’t happy but I think he doesn’t want to be happy. He’s accustomed to his bitterness, his cynicism, his quiet rage and moves forward out of both resignation, guilt, and a sense of obligation to a woman’s ghost. The actions he takes in canon aren’t so much for Harry as they are for the memory of Lily Evans.

Even if Snape could be happy at that point, change his life or his purpose, I do not think he would. He’s a man who has given up on life.

Now, onto Lily Evans.

You probably think I’m going to rail on her to for the sheer hypocrisy and nerve of marrying James Potter. I’m actually not. Lily Evans is one of my favorite characters in the Harry Potter series and probably the one I’d label as the most moral (though that’s a very low bar in Harry Potter, the characters are almost all assholes, but even so Lily would still be very high on the list).

You know what, I’m just going to damn myself and sound like a crazy person. Lily Evans always reads to me as a more moral young female Tom Riddle.

What the hell? You undoubtedly ask but I’ll explain.

Lily, while having a far more stable homelife than Tom Riddle, also comes from a muggleborn background. She’s exceptionally brilliant, very good looking, and very charming with a lot of people who would call her friends but no one close. Lily, aside from Snape (and that’s debatable), has no friends.

If Lily had not been a Gryffindor, and were Dumbledore not a raging misogynist, his Tom Riddle bells likely would have been ringing with her.

“But wait, that can’t be right!”

Oh, yes it can. First, as I went into above with Snape and Lily, there was something deeply wrong with that friendship. I believe they both considered themselves best friends, didn’t see many of the warning flags, but ultimately we see the giant fissure when Snape lets loose the m-word. Given all of that, I would not label them having been true friends in the first place. Just the appearance of friends.

Otherwise, while it’s very easily to canonically point out James’ friends it’s incredibly difficult to do so with Lily. First, people hardly remember Lily. We get Dumbledore talking about her like she’s the Virgin Mary, saving her son with the power of her love. We get Snape’s weird Virgin Mary impressions of her. Otherwise, it’s pretty much just Slughorn. Everyone else remembers that she married James and that was great because JAMES WAS SO COOL and that she had very striking eyes and was “nice”. Lily is less than a ghost in Harry Potter canon (sadly Harry never really realizing it).

Also, unlike James who has Sirius, Remus, and Peter to point towards (that are very important characters in canon). Lily has no one. The godmother was Alice Longbottom, a woman many years older than Lily and James who probably liked Lily well enough but I can’t imagine was a close friend. In canon there’s an offhand mention of two girls named Mary and Marlene but we don’t see much of them/Severus was always cited as Lily’s closest friend. As for Lily’s sister, well we know they’re estranged. I think it’s very telling that Lily writes a letter to Sirius, James’ best friend and certainly not hers, telling him that James is pouting over his invisibilty cloak. It’s because there was no one else to write.

So Lily Evans is a brilliant girl, who everyone likes and is very charming, but has no friends and led a very lonely and short life.

Here’s where my slack towards Lily comes in.

When she dumps Snape I completely understand why she did so. Snape dropping that word wasn’t simply a mistake, a moment of infinite regret, but something that revealed what he truly thought of her and where she came from. Lily was absolutely right in walking away.

However, without Snape, her closest friend is suddenly gone and the world is cold. As graduation approaches I imagine Lily’s career options become clearer and clearer. While very talented and smart, Lily is a muggleborn, what job she does manage to get (thanks to the sheer nepotism of the wizarding world/lack of jobs) will likely be through Slughorn if she manages to get a job at all. The world is cold and it is cruel and no one seems to even notice.

Cue James Potter. I do believe, probably until seventh year, Lily loathed James, not simply because of the horrifying things he did to Severus (and I’m sure she knew very little of it, Snape hiding most of it from her out of pride and shame), but because he’s just a giant dick. He’d make flirting with her a kind of game and joke to be shared with Sirius, something to hold over Snape’s head, like she’s a prize to be one.

However, by seventh year the werewolf incident has happened, Snape’s retreated further and further into Death Eater recruit land and she’s cut him off, and for all my “James is a dick” I do imagine he calmed down a little. Now that Snape is no longer friends with Lily/after the whole almost murder incident I imagine they didn’t bully him nearly as much as they used to. Though yes, they probably still bullied him, but Lily probably doesn’t know that now that she’s lost contact with Snape.

James is charming and very good looking. He seems a bit more mature than he used to be. Lily is desperately lonely, living in a world that rejects everything she is, and James seems like one of the few who does support her (that James is more of a ‘pretty fly for a white guy’ kind of support for muggleborns doesn’t hit until later). So Lily is charmed and makes the largest mistake of her life, she and James start dating.

Now, given their extreme youth as well as Lily’s pedigree (say what you like, I don’t think Mr. and Mrs. Potter were thrilled that their son was dating a muggleborn) I imagine the wedding was a shot gun wedding and Lily got unintentionally pregnant. Yes, go ahead and throw fruit at me or call foul, I just can’t imagine they’d want a child that young while in the middle of a war while they’re part of an active resistance movement and only just out of Hogwarts.

Then things start snowballing downhill. Lily and James have just joined the resistance movement, Lily’s son is prophesied to defeat Voldemort, they strongly suspect one of James’ close friends is a spy, and they’re forced into hiding.

In hiding is where I imagine stress runs high and their marriage begins to fall apart. We know from Lily’s letter that James was routinely leaving hiding, using the cloak, so he could meet up with Sirius and Peter (I imagine Lupin’s on the out as they suspected he was the spy). While James might not realize what a big deal that was, I imagine Lily always did, and she begins to realize just what she’s gotten herself into but there’s no way out while in hiding.

Now we go really off the rails into headcanon territory in: what the hell is up with Harry Potter?

In my stories, I often choose the unwitting god route. Harry can’t die because he is a god, he becomes the master of death and always was the master of death. This is an answer, but it’s one that makes canon Harry a god and... I would not want canon Harry as a god. JKR and Dumbledore push the “Lily loved her child so much that it deflected death... multiple times” but this always felt... unsatisfying. Many parents love their children (fathers too, JKR, let’s not make this weird Virgin Mary thing) and yet Harry Potter alone in the history of mankind survives multiple times.

Most likely, Lily pulled off some insane bullshit with absolutely no resources and minimal education AND EVERYONE IGNORES IT. We do know that Lily crafted the blood wards, wards stronger than anything Dumbledore himself can come up with/than Voldemort can break. Ones that protect Harry not only at home but away from it as it melts Voldemort for simply touching his skin. Lily pulled off the impossible in only a few months and did it right under everyone’s nose.

This makes her easily one of the most intelligent characters in Harry Potter. Probably beating out Dumbledore and maybe tying with Tom Riddle. And Dumbledore tells us, “Your Virgin Mary mother loved you so much, Harry, that it courses through your veins and lights those that would want to harm you on fire.”

So, that’s Lily for you.

Now, that said, I’m probably a bit biased and clearly very lenient with her marrying James. To be honest it took me years to figure out why the hell Lily would ever marry James after what happened with Severus and was always one of those weird canon things I never quite understood. He’s that good looking and charming, I guess, was my response.

The answer I now land on with some confidence was that the world is that cruel and bleak and Lily was utterly alone for two years.

By the way, a side note/plug, of all my stories while head canons do pop up here and there I think “October” is one where they tend to crop up more. It’s a vast AU of canon, but it gives an idea of what I think x character would do in y situation.

#headcanons #harry potter #lily evans #severus snape #october

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