#imagine if clown saw this
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Bouncy Barnaby B. Beagle Spring Toy!
Only $1.39!
Ok but actually it was really fun making this silly little beagle! It took a while but he’s finally done! Sorry if the lightning is bad, I only have one lamp in my room! But anyways, enjoy some photos of him!
Yes, I gave him his silly tie back! I hope his head doesn’t fall off!
#welcome home#welcome home Barnaby#barnaby b beagle#barnaby beagle#slinky#clay#welcome home fanart#would it be fanart?#I mean it’s still art#slinky toy#bouncy Barnaby b beagle spring toy#I just had to have him#party coffin#imagine if clown saw this#I could cry#also happy April fools day#I figured it was appropriate to post a Barnaby thing on April fools#he would love this holiday#do you think he invented the welcome home equivalent to it?#like how Wally made the equivalent to Christmas#and Sally to Halloween#I think Barnaby would do that#ok I’m done rambling whoops
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What if when they're all at Laughtale and there's a huge battle going on, Buggy is just steps away from the treasure and becoming King? It's literally right there in front of him, he could reach out and achieve his dream.
But something rips his gaze from it, makes him glance behind to see Shanks about to be killed. Now, he's torn. Torn between being the Pirate King, or saving the guy who broke his heart 24 years ago. He really shouldn't care what happens to Shanks, he shouldn't! The guy did nothing but lie and cheat him, serves him right! Except, well.... this was also the same guy who didn't go to Laughtale the first time because he wanted to stay behind and take care of Buggy. Shanks, the guy he grew up with. Shanks, the guy who used to be his best friend.
Buggy's not a good guy, by any means. He's a pirate! He takes what he wants and does whatever he wants because he can! He's a selfish and greedy bastard, and he's not gonna deny that. And what he really wants is to be the next King.
Then why is he fully turning around, disregarding the ONE PIECE to start moving those final steps in the WRONG DIRECTION? Now, he's got full sight of Shanks about to be at Death's door. And Buggy feels his body moving, rushing towards the red haired idiot.
GAH! Just- screw it! To hell with it! Who cares about being King, anyway? Not Buggy, apparently! No, he'd rather sacrifice his one dream just to save the man he's despised all these years! What the hell?!
And save him, he does. Buggy practically throws himself into the cross-fire, joining the fight. The two of them end up fighting together, and Shanks catches himself staring. He honestly didn't think Buggy would do something like that, resigned himself to that reality. Buggy's always full of surprises, though, isn't he?
Everything's done, the battle is over. Luffy became the new King, all's well that ends well. Shanks looks over to Buggy.
"You're really okay with not being King? After all this time?"
Buggy looks back at him, heaves a dramatic sigh and closes his eyes.
"Yeah, well...," he shakes his head with a growing smile on his face. "Turns out, I might have missed you, too."
#one piece#shanks#buggy#red haired shanks#buggy the clown#op shanks#op buggy#buggy one piece#shanks one piece#shuggy#shanks x buggy#buggy x shanks#imagine that's how it ends#neither of them ever get to see the treasure#buggy isn't actually king#but his followers definitely saw him near it#they tell everyone buggy's the true king#he is perfectly fine with being the pseudo king#that last line is a reference to the Marineford dub#where shanks says he missed buggy
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Okay, random question but in the panel where Lan Zhan & Wei Ying are riding side by side, why is Alan Zhan’s horse sad? Is Little Apple bullying him? :(
PS: I check in daily for your posts, OBSESSED 😭
Alan Zhan (patron saint of when the substitute professor gets your name wrong).
#poorly drawn mdzs#ask#MDZS#wei wuxian#lan wangji#mdzs au#I was going to give a serious answer but then I saw Alan Lan#I gotta warn you all; if it was not already evident - I am the biggest instigator of 'typo in the group chat' hazing#be warned (affectionate (non-threatening (a little threatening)))#Shout out to everyone with a non-western standard name who went to a western school and had their name constantly butchered#shout out to everyone who goes by/went by a nickname because 'people don't mess it up'#I *see* you. May you find Solstice in St. Alan Zhan's arms#whether wwx snuck into the class early to change the attendance sheet is is innocent is up to your interpretation#he's just enjoying the class president (and his academic rival) lose his cool#i dont have a ton of modern au thoughts but I do love the teen era dynamic of ‘smart class clown and smart nephew of headmaster’ rivalry#idk how it was at other people’s schools but the viciousness of being in the top 5 in class was a bloodbath at mine#The *Drama* between top students was wild. Validictorian selection was basically done at knife point#anyways; who’s writing teen wangxian modern AU where they are rivals for the valedictorian spot?#getting to know each other just to win but then actually enjoying the tome spent together#they both need to win and be the best sooooo bad; I cant imagine such a story ends well#wow we got far from Alan Zhan in the tags#Thank you for your on going support! I hope you don't mind me teasing you a bit like this tumblr user deathoverdignity#comic proper resumes tomorrow!
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🌊💙
#gamingedit#vgedit#bg3edit#bg3#gameplaydaily#Baldur's Gate#Baldur's Gate 3#bg3 spoilers#Shadowheart#faesedits#mybg3#mybg#*2023#oc: faolan#otp: more of life than i'd ever imagined possible#nsft#JUST IN CASE#i tried to hide the t(i(tt(y#if u saw something underwater no you didn't#speaking of shadowheart and clowns she did turn him into a man who is absolutely silly for her#also larian why would you not animate the water to splash when u splash her e__e
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Attack on @sailortoasty for Artfight! 🤡🥩🎈
#my art#sailortoasty#artfight#artfight 2023#clowngirl oc#clown girl#clown oc#grimace shake#as soon as i saw her i knew i wanted to draw her + the grimace shake thing was like. soooo perfect lol.#and shes a vlogger like omgggg imagine her food review grimace shake video...... i HAD to. anyway hope you like it!
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everytime the victim photos get shown my eye twitches
#aprentance adam is real TO ME#i know i’m clowning but imagine#saw#saw franchise#adam stanheight#saw posting#aprentance adam
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always funny how when non m/m shipping ppl decide to take a fandom of choice and start doing a whole “wow! it’s so unique and interesting and cool and good how there’s NO feasible m/m ship that anyone could find in this story at all!” bit about it, they invariably choose a fandom where with 0 familiarity beyond a 1 sentence synopsis/description of each character you can immediately identify The obvious m/m ship
#aka what do carl engle laird and a random lesbian interest tumblr have in common#context: while the carl engle laird thing lives rent free in my brain i saw someone saying this abt MOUTHWASHING#i know almost nothing about that fandom but i did a double take scrolling past that post bc the main thing i DO know#seemed to indicate a very obvious m/m ship#statements like this would be much more homophobic if the ppl making them didn’t come out looking like such clowns#self#also can u imagine the reaction if someone said this abt f/f#(…ironically wouldn’t this statement about f/f actually be true of mouthwashing?)#but anyway like my god what kind of world is it when ppl think it’s appropriate to COMPLIMENT a work by saying#‘wow good job making sure there’s no way any of the men in this work of fiction might be having gay thoughts!’ like wtf#but hey at least you owned the fujos
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hey so my brain is stuck on the thought of aradia x gamzee and i'm just thinkin',,,what if they were matesprits. if you wanna go dark with it, doc scratch could have done so much more like? grooming and shit to aradia. caliborn and gamzee have a fucked up relationship but ya know, his dad deserves a handmaid too as he ushers in a new era. a gamzee who killed equius for not bringing aradia back right. an aradia who just wants to be free, who is maid of time and yet not a single second has even been hers. who wants to share this freedom with her friend, her matesprit. a gamzee who wants to see aradia go apeshit. who wants to see her fight for herself and what she wants. honestly? red-rom is fun but imagine a pitch relationship. a fucked up rivalry where they keep pushing and pushing, both wanting what the other has, other feels but can't get the other person to experience it.
#anyway. hello. i'm in my rarepair hell and decided to share#currently the song for them is curses by the crane wives#but i have also found tongues and teeth (also by the crane wives) to be fun to think about them too#so. that's my soap box. i hope you enoyed it#homestuck#gamzee makara#aradia megido#aradia megido x gamzee makara#gamzee makara x aradia megido#aragam#ramzee#i saw that ship name one (1) time and it looked cute so??#clown time??? is that the ship????#goat time?? god i don't even know#honestly rotating them in my head they could be so fucked up they could be so toxic for each other but also#imagine if they healed each other. just a little#that's all :)
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me when i see a character poll that features a character from the hit franchise Saw: the hit franchise Saw has characters?
#this isn't really supposed to be an insult or anything necessarily#just i am so insulated from the hit franchise Saw that i cannot imagine there being characters in it outside of the titular Saw Traps#the traps exist to eternally torture soulless homunculi as some sort of cosmic thought experiment by a little clown man#that's sort of how i imagine it#when i do imagine it#which is not often
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Hewooo, good morninggg!
ask game time ✨
For Caine: Philia 4 + Storge 3 in the context of tbe farm or tia elena
For Cyrus: Eros 1 + Storge 4 (sibling au ✨) + Philautia 4
im probably a few hours late when i finish answering this, but morning idle :D! hope you had a good one
Philia 4. Is your OC able to build close friendships with people very different from themselves? Perhaps in terms of culture, age or personality?
i was thinking about this yesterday on my way home from uni actually. the answer is yes, but with one baseline requirement: anybody they become close with needs to be able to ground them in one way or another. mortum and argent are possible, he appreciates their bluntness and strict boundaries. he likes to listen to mortum and occasionally bounce off ideas with her. he already holds respect for argent, and given time, she couldve grown to be a trusted confidante. however, they want to keep mortum as a purely business relationship at the moment, and argent already scared them off before anything could happen. heralds not getting any further than coach or "he seems nice", they like him but they get a headache whenever theyre in a room with him for too long. other than that, anybody goes. hes not picky.
Storge 3. How far does parental approval (imagined or expressed) impact upon their current sense of self-worth? What might they sacrifice or attempt to achieve in order to ensure the approval of their parents?
the answer varies wildly for either, so ill answer for both. in the case of tia elena, parental approval is a bit shocking to him, like with most relationship dynamics. they like it, they just cant fathom the fact that theyre getting percieved, much less in a positive light. hed do a lot to get more, its fascinating to him and it makes him feel like hes doing a good job. but its something they can easily give up if the situation calls for it (aka theyre my only step tia elenas 'im-not-mad-im-just-disappointed' look wouldnt work on).
the farm is...a very different story. they were made to be a tool, and if its a tool they want, a tool they shall get. before their escape he was very single-minded when accomplishing missions. get the job done in any way possible. consequences arent for him to worry about, he only needs to worry about if they mess up. which they wont. they make sure of it. after their escape he leans less into that mindset, but its difficult to let go of, and still bleeds into his relationships most of the time. they dont like to think about the fact they wouldve sacrificed anything for the farm back then, and that theyre not sure they wouldnt sacrifice anything now if the right people asked it from them.
Eros 1. Is your OC romantic in the traditional sense? Do they enjoy giving or receiving gifts of flowers or confectionary? Or are there other courtship traditions from their culture of origin that are important to them?
nobody but him is allowed to be romantic. thats it thats the answer were moving on
in all seriousness, he does do traditionally romantic things alot, though most of them are for the reaction, not courtesy. roses and flowers are a common way for him to try and fluster his dates, and the two people hes dated are both sappy suckers so its worked most of the time. the exception is gift giving, because most of his gifts are handmade, so he tries not to make a big deal about it. unfortunately, his partners always do.
receiving romantic gestures should be something hes used to at this point, but hes not, so it always catches him off gaurd. its embarrassing, but the most embarrassing part is that he gets strangely touched by it. he probably still has a teddy gifted to him thats never seeing the light of day. oh, and chocolates are always welcome. thats just good food.
Storge 4. Does your OC have any siblings? If so then did their parents have a favourite growing up? Has their relationship with their sibling changed in adulthood? If they don't have any siblings then do they perhaps feel they have missed out on an important relationship? Do they have any especially close friends who go some way towards filling that role?
sibling au time✨
does the farm have the normal version of a favourite?? no. do they have a favourite 'im gonna fuck them up for fun' sibling? yes and thats fawn. north is a bastard and he frequently makes cyrus dream of murder. as for how their relationships all changed, cyrus used to be closer to his siblings. a Lot closer. of course, the farm changed that. he became cruel and harsh, which fawn couldnt connect with. even with river who wants to be evil, cyrus became obsessive about control after heartbreak, which i dont think river appreciates. his mental imprint changed extremely, and he started shielding around them. needless to say their relationship was estranged for a good while, but cyrus can never stay away from the people he cares about.
Storge 5. Which of your OC's qualities makes them the most proud? Do they think more people should be like them in this regard? Or do they quite like being rare in possessing it?
hes proudest of his ability to stay logical and composed, unaffected by emotions. that last part isnt true btw, but he gets to believe it to feel better about himself. hes able to think things through and do what needs to be done without external influence. he thinks itd be easier for everybody if they were more like him, but secretly, hes relieved that theyre not. itd get less people hurt, but the poison is addicting, yk? if people were as logical as he wanted them to be, ortega and herald (and maybe mortum, the verdict is pending) wouldve dropped him by now, yet persistent assholes that they are, they stay with him anyway. he likes the trade-off.
questions are from here!
#caine lynzal#cyrus becker#caine needs more friends#revelation please give them the chance to get more friends#arde and vera are good contenders but id have to see more of them to decide#also i unintentionally sold myself on an argent/caine dynamic#rev please let me give argent another chance i swear caine wont be a pussy this time 🙏🙏🙏#cyrus keeps clowning on the people he dates for being mushy losers#but he cannot face the fact that He is a mushy loser#coward#also since cyrus/river dynamic with control was brought up again:#i need to point out that river has 82% leadership (last i saw it) and cyrus has under 60#the dynamic shift wouldve thrown cyrus for a Loop#imagine getting ordered sround by your baby sibling and him being good at it#cyrus is never living that down#cyrus becker(s)#nmoc: fawn becker(s)#nmoc: river becker(s)#they were mentioned so they get to go in there too#pulp answers#ask game#thank you for the ask idle :)
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Thinking over parent hcs and honestly, Itto is just like.
Goofy
Itto would just outright be Goofy like of the Goofy movie continuities
#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//Just Goofy with Max in general#//Is the most clown mf; would absolutely embarrass TF outta his child; but try so hard to always be good#//Nothing is more important to him than his kiddo’s happiness; even if he humiliates himself in the process#//Well; not like that worry’s ever stopped him before lol#//But ye#//Takes any rejection and bad attitudes HARD from his kiddo(s)#hc; itto#//Would actually try so hard to get his shit together so his kids could have a good upbringing#//One full of so much love and having everything they could ever want; he’d be so doting#//And the kiddo would be raised by a whole village; the Arataki gang deffo being SO involved#//Itto would try so hard not to just leave the kid to Kuki or his s/o; he’d genuinely try to learn to do right be the kiddo himself#//Asking help only if Really necessary or when he gotta go work#//There was this one TikTok I saw of a dad with his baby strapped to his chest in a carrier#//and him and his buddies jamming to baby songs for the kiddo while they hung out#//THAT is how I like to imagine it’d go#//Sometimes: a fam is an oni; his s/o; their bab; and the gang lol
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Don't you even dare to ask me what this is because I don't know myself. I'm a harlot, I'm plagued, I'm the devil, I don't know. That's the answer. I find information online and I.JUST.CAN'T.LET.IT.GO. SCREAM INTO THE VOID WITH ME OKAY?? P.S. DON'T READ THIS
Notes: the most cursed, demonic, absolutely horribly filthy thing I'll ever sear anyone's eyes with? Possibly? This isn't as daring as I can get, ask my best friend if you don't believe me, but this is the most daring I'll ever be on here Warnings: do I need to? Read every other clue, babes, just.. pure filth... you know where the exit door is if you're a child. Also there's body insecurity in this. From a male perspective. Which gets written about very little, in my opinion, but it's prevalent and well... we're here to change the insecure kings opinions of themselves 😤 Word count: 4 154 words
It's a gradual thing. Something you don't realise at first. It happens slowly and covertly, so you don't really understand that it's happening. But at some point you start to piece it together. He watches himself in the mirror a lot, after showers and when he's getting dressed early in the morning. He avoids looking at himself late at night, especially after heavy and harsh days at work. He avoids looking at his body, unless he's scrutinising himself. Like... after.. Every. Single. Shower. You don't understand that's what he's doing at first, because he's so serious and focused as he looks at himself in the mirror from all angles. You assume he must be checking for bruises, cuts, scrapes, etc. That he must be assessing the damage that a harshly physical job brings. You'd want to take in all the damage too because it's painful to sit on a bruise you didn't know was there until you squashed it.. it's happened to him a lot more than he'll ever admit. But.. you catch him squeezing his stomach once. He did it so fast you barely understood that's what he did. Until it hit you that he just did something you're always doing too, when you look in the mirror, and feel insecure about yourself. He becomes closed off after that. Doesn't touch you as much, doesn't let you touch him much either. His clothes have always been looser, he likes being comfortable, but somehow they become even looser. He avoids anything that flatters him, dresses in baggy, completely dark clothes. Like he's trying to become a walking void. He starts stressing about aging too. Looks in the mirror and prodes at his face, looking for wrinkles and white hairs. None that exist at all. But he seems to think they do.. and then he starts making comments..
Seems obsessed with your age too, the difference between you both. Who's younger, who's older, how many years, months, days, there are between you. What he was up to in x year vs where you were. What he was doing, what he already knew how to do, what little amount of experience and life you might have lived in year y when he was already on an inevitable path to becoming who he is today. Becomes obsessed with time, stresses about the future. Stresses about the past, feels sadly nostalgic, reminisces and wishes he could have been there earlier, wishes to change who he is to match up with you better. Wishes things were different and there was more time. Acts as if the end of the world is looming near and there's only 5 more minutes on earth left to spend together. Looks sad and forlorn. And the most frustrating and infuriating thing is that he doesn't let you in. Shuts you down when you remind him that reality isn't what he's imagining in his head lately. Dismisses you when you challenge his view and explain that things are fine and there's so many more years in a lifetime to be lived, there's time for everything and more. Pushes you away when you try to touch him at times even.. makes you feel cold inside. Confused and scared that things might be falling apart and you can't fix it because he won't let you in. It starts to enrage you. Because he keeps pushing his own perceived notions of everything onto you, assumes the "reality" he's seeing as something that you are seeing when you couldn't see it further from that if you tried. It all comes to blows late one night after a disastrous dinner.
You put on your nicest dress. You wanted to look nice for him, wanted him to see you again because he wasn't looked at you in a while now. You miss him so badly. Miss his touch, miss his kisses, miss.. well.. you miss feeling his body on yours in ways that the bible possibly wouldn't approve of.. it's been what? a month? possibly a month now. He complains he's stressed, that there's too much on his plate, that he's too distracted by work but he forgets that.. usually.. it was most prevalent when he was stressed.. because, in his own words, 'you relaxe me like nothing else, baby'. Cheesy and he's the first to admit it, but there's something deep and almost fragilely emotional behind the jokes. Like every time he teases and says cheesy lines he means them deeply, he's just afraid to show exactly how deeply that is. Even in the longing looks he gives you, which have become more frequent lately, it's as if he's deeply afraid to lose you but only biding his time until you'll inevitably walk away. As if he doesn't believe he's good enough for you.. and he makes it evident all through dinner. Comments on how the waiter keeps checking you out, something which would normally bring out his jealous side and he'd feel the need to assert his dominance to every man in a 10km radius. Not tonight. He comments on how young the waiter is, how he seems to be in great shape, and dares to look at you and say "Maybe you should ditch the old man and go for a young one.. it might suit you better." winks and tries to act like it's playful but.. you've had enough. You push away from the table "That's it. I want to go home. I've lost my appetite." and you just walk out to go wait by his car. He's fuming by the time he gets to you but says nothing. Drives in absolute silence too and you're so hurt and angry you can't find it in yourself to say a word. When you arrive, you rush into the house, leaving him behind to park in the garage, but he's somehow not far behind you by the time you're tossing your shoes aside. "Did you think that was funny? Did you enjoy ruining our dinner?" he has the utter gall to say... and you lose your temper finally.
"Excuse me?? I did what now?" and he marches towards you, presses his body to yours, you almost feel angry when you think this is the closest he's gotten to you in 3 weeks, he looms over you and reminds you exactly of how big his body is, says irritated "You stormed out over a stupid joke and you ruined the nice dinner we'd been having. By now you should know that I joke around a lot, I don't get why you acted this way tonight. You can be such a child sometimes." you're not in your right mind but you're so angry that you push him. Harshly. He stumbles back a little, wasn't expecting that from you, looks at you hurt and offended. But you just scoff and march towards him now "No, I did not. You ruined our fucking dinner by being a Debbie Downer. Same way you've been every single fucking day lately. Mentioned some other man whom I wouldn't even look once at proper, let alone twice, daring to suggest that I should make a switch. How are you this fucking dense?" you're toe to toe, looking into each other's eyes, angry at each other. There's a crackling of electricity in the air around you, you're both on the verge of losing your tempers entirely. "Maybe you need a younger man, he'd probably have more patience to put up with your childish behaviour. I'm old and tired." you've never wanted to slap him before, but he's making it really hard on you not to.. "No, you're fucking not! Have you heard yourself lately?! I'm old this, I'm finished that, I'm such and such. What the hell has gotten into you?? All the jokes about me being too young, all the comments about other guys and their bodies, all the shit about how I should probably leave before I have to start caring for the elderly.. what the fuck?? What is your problem?! If you're sick and tired of me just break up, don't bully me into leaving and try to make it seem like it's my fucking choice!" he suddenly gets serious. He feels there's a threat to his relationship, that the real option that you might leave is right there in front of him, that this is the end.. and he doesn't know how to deal with that. He's hurt just thinking about it. So he shuts down as he always does. "If you want to leave you can go right ahead. You know where the doors are and no one has ever locked you in this house against your will. But don't blame it on me, I haven't told you to do shit." and he just walks away.
You stare at the wall in front of you, the empty space he's left behind, for likely 5 or more minutes. It's eerily quiet in the bedroom, even though he's in there, and you're trying to let your anger settle down. He's hurt, he feels threatened, he feels pushed. He only ever reacts with cold detachment when he feels deeply hurt. You're trying so hard not to be hurt but you can't help the tears running down your cheeks. You love this man so much it hurts, physically, like there's aches in your chest when you think about how deeply you love him, how desperately you desire him, how much you want to spend all your minutes with him forever. It hurts deeply that he doesn't seem to accept that, or believe it, lately. Something has changed and he won't let you in on it. It feels cold to be left out, you thought you shared everything as one. It's painful to think you don't. But you don't want this to be the end. You're not ready to let go, you'll never be. You take a deep breath and turn around, walk to the bedroom and find him curled in on himself. Frozen in place and eerily still. 'Deeply hurt.. makes two of us, mate' you think. Clearly, he's not ready to let go either. You lay down behind him, wrap your arms around him as best as you can and you feel his whole body tense up. "I love you. I don't understand why you don't believe me, but I love you so much. I don't know what else to do to show this to you in a way you'll accept it too." He takes several minutes but eventually turns around. His face is red, he's trying not to cry in front of you but his eyes are filled with tears. He pulls you to him, kisses you softly but so deeply, whispers in that rough and affected voice of his that's so unfairly and wrongly sexy for the moment, "I love you so much that I want to die thinking about you leaving me." "Then why are you pushing me away?" he won't meet your eyes, his voice is soft and whispered, dripping with insecurity now, "Because I don't deserve you."
"No. No no no. No." you shake your head, hold his face and keep kissing him, want to pour all the love you feel into him so he'll believe it too. His hands wrap around your body, pull you so tight to him that you can feel every line of muscle in his body, every tendon moving, every ridge and curve of him, "Don't ever say that again, just don't. Don't say that." he shakes his head "It's true. You're just.. you deserve better. I'm washed up, tired, old and just.." he whispers so so quietly you barely hear it. Fat. It takes you so many seconds to realise he said it. He just called himself fat. The scoff you let out fills the air. You're furious now. Who said it? Who insulted him? Who broke his confidence this way?? Who was it?? You'll have their heads on a platter. How dare anyone insult your man? How dare anyone make him feel like his body isn't the picture of perfection? In another century he would have had artists tripping over themselves to sculpt him out of marble, he would have been Adonis.. David.. the ideal male physique. He would have been considered a god. "How dare you? Who said it??" he just looks at you "Who the fuck said you were fat? I'll kick their ass! Who was the fucker that made you feel insecure??", he leans up and moves from you, sits up on the bed, and looks at the floor, "No one had to say anything. I have eyes, you know? I get dressed around men every single day, I've seen more men naked in the last ten years than most people have in a lifetime.. I can see the differences between us." you scramble up to sit next to him, angry and shocked that he's thinking these things about himself, "How the fu-.. no! Absolutely not! What the hell?? No! You are not less than any other guy. In fact! You're hotter than all of them combined! There is not a single guy out there that can compete with you and win. You're just..." you gesture wildly, can't even pin down exactly what he stands for and how insanely attractive he is, "You're everything! You're all of it! You're smart, you're cultured, you have unbelievably quick reflexes, you have a body that would make Gods jealous, you're so fucking fine.., you also have the stamina of a fighting bull and.." you trail off, get distracted by all the flashes of heated memories flooding your mind, all the times he's had you whining, writhing, moaning, biting and clawing at him.. all the times he's had you in tears from how good he is.. all the times he's left you wobbly legged and sore, faint even hours after he was done, dreaming about it and wanting more.. your voice is clearly affected when you speak again "You're so good, baby, no one can match you. Ever. You're the whole package. You're so sweet and caring too, and loving, and supportive. You make me feel so safe, so loved, so confident.." you feel deeply hurt that he makes you feel beautiful and desirable every time yet he's riddled with insecurity and you can't fix it as easily, you don't have to be subjected to seeing women you know on the covers of 'Hottest Guy Alive' magazines and making it to the tops of 'hottest players' lists.. he has to see that. Polls, online discussions, debates, comments, everything from everywhere. Subjected to scrutiny. Criticism. Comments about their bodies and doubts about their fitness levels depending on their shape. It makes you sick. Makes your blood boil. It happens to women, of course, but men rarely get another man defending them. Especially in this field. You want him to see it, want him to know it. So.. you take the best approach you know how: go for his ego. Turn him on. You get closer to him, say softly, "This is strictly off the record and just between us but...", whisper right in his ear, "You're so fucking hot that I'm always soaked around you..." he straightens up, gives you such a heated look.. you keep whispering, looking him in the eyes, "Especially lately... you haven't touched me in so long.. just the other night... I-.." "You what?" you can feel him radiating heat, radiating need..
"You were sleeping naked.. which you rarely do lately and it's really fucking offensive mind you.. but.. the sheet had moved down because you keep tossing and turning lately.. and you were just there.. totally naked... hard.. and I.. fuck, I wanted it so badly.. I've missed you so much.. that I just touched myself imagining all the times that we've woken each other up to have sex.." he scoots closer to you, his eyes are on fire.. "Did you now?" you nod and bite your lip softly, whisper so so quietly "I was completely drenched.. I've.. really missed you... you have no idea how attractive you are.. and the effect that has on me.." he kisses you so roughly. Pulls you to him tightly, his tongue making it's way to stroke against yours, he pulls back and bites your lip, grins when you whine, kisses you deeper, spit and tongues mixing together as you fall back into a pile on the bed. His hands leave a fire in their wake as he pulls your dress off of you in a hurry, you undress him just as hurriedly, albeit rougher than he was, desperate to get him exactly where you need him. It's a need at this point. The same way you need to breath to survive. You need him to survive too. You go insane without his touch. You've been so irritated and on edge lately... he's been so cranky too... because you're both balls of pent up sexual frustration. "You're not fat, not even a bit. The only thing that's fat about you is your co-" he laughs into the kiss he gives you, a light-hearted laugh, and a giddy feeling spreads through your body. He hasn't been this happy in a long while. You love his laugh, you love everything about him. You cling to him as his body sinks into yours, so deep that sparks burst behind your eyelids. It's been enough time since this happened that it's a stretch.. he's.. not the smallest man around, in fact.. "Fucking hell, you're too much, you know that?" he just laughs, low and rough, mixed with a moan right there in your ear, "You've never complained before.. quite the contrary, baby.." he's right. You love the feeling of him. How big he is, how heavy his body is on top of yours, how warm and sturdy he feels too.. he makes you feel caged, but in the most comforting way possible. He's breathing in your ear as he thrusts slowly, it's been a while for him too, he needs to go slow for the sake of both of you. Needs to let both of your bodies adjust again, sink into this feeling, enjoy how good it feels when you're this close. He's missed you like this, under him and so willing.. he's missed your body as badly as he's missed closeness to you. He's such an idiot for going this long without touching and kissing you..
He sinks even deeper as he drops more of his weight on you, you whine loudly and bite on his shoulder, nails digging into his strong arms. A struggling, disbelieving laugh is exhaled from him, he shivers and moans roughly. He doesn't even want to move, just wants to stay right here, exactly like this, forever. He pauses to enjoy the feeling, the warmth, the slickness, the clenching. How soft your skin is. How pliable and tender you are under him. He feels every bit of him touching every bit of you. Suddenly he becomes hyper aware of that. His naked body is touching yours. His stomach... he's taken the biggest dislike to his stomach now... he doesn't have the tight, washboard abs he sees on most guys. He's meatier, always been. It makes him insecure lately. And he's now hyper aware that that fleshiness is touching your body. He recoils at the thought, his body tenses up and you feel it immediately. He starts to pull away but you lock your legs around his hips, pull him back, say desperately, nearly in tears, "No, no no no. Don't. Please don't, I need it so badly. I've missed you. I want you so much, god, I want you so badly. Don't. No, just don't." he pauses, tries to clench his abs so he can make his softness less evident, so it doesn't touch you that closely, and you know he's doing it. You used to do just that at the start. Tried to make your body look and feel more toned. So that he'd love you and he wouldn't find you unattractive. He made you realise that he thinks you're the hottest thing on two legs no matter how you look. So.. "I love your tummy, stop doing that shit." it startles him, he looks down at you and you're starring right into his eyes. You lock gazes and your voice is dripping with need when you speak "You don't realise how fucking amazing it feels.. you don't get that your body is just.. amazing for sex. I want you to press down on me because it.. I can't explain it but it feels so good. Like you're touching me deeper even without touching me. It feels amazing, it's just.. sex with you feels godly. Relax. I want to feel your body, all of you. Because it feels really fucking good from my end and you're robbing me of a really good orgasm if you hold back.. and that is what I might have to leave you over.." he looks unsure for a long moment. You play with his hair, your other hand runs your nails up and down the middle of his back and you feel him shiver, he moans softly.. his lids slide shut.. and you feel it. He starts to relax, little by little, let's all the restraint go and presses down on you.
You can feel every millimetre of him pressed to you. Locking you down against the mattress, overheating your skin. Making you dizzy, skin on fire as he speeds up, sinks so deep that your eyes can't focus and you have to shut them. There's a pounding in your head, your heart is beating so fast that you can feel the veins pulsating in your temples. Every muscle, every tendon, and every bulging vein in his body is palpable to you. You feel the tensing and the relaxing, the tendons stretching and pulling back, you can feel his blood rushing in his veins, his heart beats in sync with yours pressed tightly to your breast. You're only one body in this moment. You feel the tummy pressing into you, putting pressure on your core, something that feels so good and he tried to pull away from you.. nearly robbed you of one thing that drives you wild. You love the look of him, you love the feel of him even more. It makes you desperate, pant for air, makes you shiver and moan, soft and whiny, into his neck. Makes you rise higher and higher as you tighten more and more around him. He's speaking but you can't focus on what he's saying, so lost in your own need that all his whispered words turn into just the hum of his sexy voice in your ear. You can feel it building up at the base of your spine, can almost touch it right at your fingertips. He moves faster, whispering something that sounds so sexy yet you can't make out exactly what it is, and you just crumble under him. Claw his back, bite his shoulder, muffle your garbled whines and moans and fall apart so hard that you feel you're melting all over. You feel him, right there, right along with you too. It feels heavenly, you've missed him so much. You're giggling and crying afterwards, muffled sounds into his shoulder, tears staining his skin as you shake and cling to him. He pulls back, concerned that you're hurt, you look at him and give him a watery smile. "I love you so much." emotion chokes you and he looks affected too "I love you so deeply, I love you.". Tears are running down your face as giggles burst from you. You pull him down into a kiss, melt into him, sigh so relaxed and just hold him tightly. He rolls sideways and takes you with him, holds you close and plays with your hair, kisses your temple as you trace circles on his chest and rub your face all over him like a cat. "Are you okay?" he asks almost a little concerned and you nod, smile up at him, "I missed you.." you're rewarded with a sweet kiss, a soft smile and a caress to your cheek, "I missed you too. I'm really sorry for being a dickhead. I was a fucking idiot, I'm sorry." you nuzzle him and say "I think I can forgive you..." he raises an eyebrow and gives you that look he always does "If..." you sigh.. smile so sweetly.. devil personified.. "If you keep doing that all night.. you know.. to make up for all the times you haven't lately.." he burst into a light laugh and says, a little cocky, "I think I can manage that.." before he's kissing you breathless. It's going to be a long night, but that's exactly what you had been planning for..
#PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS#IF YOU LOVE YOURSELF?? YOU WON'T DO THIS TO YOURSELF#also note to remember: i'm dyslexic.. if something doesn't make sense or words are messed up? that's why#i try really hard to catch every mistake when i read this over and over#but often times i can't see the errors until a few hours or days have passed#BUT DON'T READ THIS AND THEN YOU WON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH MY DYSLEXIA#anyway.. this one is for the dadbods out there 😌😌#if you're obsessed with a man with a dadbod? well.. JOIN THE CLUB BESTIE WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR??#also also also let's pretend you *don't* know who i'm picturing okay?#it makes it less awkward for all of us involved#just picture however you love the most that has a little soft tummy and is sexy as all hell 😉😘😜#football imagine#football fanfic#adventure's in a clown's dreams#except i wrote this while wide awake so what's my excuse??#my excuse is actually the fact that i saw this thing on IG#and i learned a few more... nasty.. scientific things about the humble (lawful good) dadbod....#and how they're peak performance for.. 👹💃🏻 (the devil's tango)#because.. pressure is everything; you know queens?#and well...... i've always loved a dadbod.. anyway#i gotta go now DON'T READ THIS THANK YOU AND GOOD NIGHT
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was just subjected to a self righteous post about how we need to learn to respect second generation atheists (important context: i am one) and how their existence begs the question of if atheism is always in reaction to something or if it can be an independently held position. which then followed it up with a 'summary of responses to this post' that included, peppered among things second generation atheists said or remarks about never hearing about this before, extremely reactionary positions about the necessity of religion in life all couched in the language of simple 'concern' for these atheists upbringing. like omg yesss your post is soooo important we really need to interrogate this group that is persecuted by literally every large religious organization on the planet about if their way of life is legitimate! its sooooooo crucial we open doors to religious mandates. its imperative that we teach them about religion, a thing they are so cruelly denied, but dont worry guys, for some of them, its not their fault! we can help them! by making them religious i mean teaching them about religion! remember that some jewish people are atheists too <3
#myposts#before you clown on me about the last sentence here#ask yourself why this websites number one method of trying to be charitable and lend credibility to nonreligious people#is to associate them with a religious group. ask yourself where that impulse comes from#when talking about areligiosity. you have to say DONT WORRY GUYS some of them are still like kiiiiinda religious lol#and dont worry even the ones that arent jewish are BASICALLY just christians bc of cultural christianity of course#thats how that works. theres only two religions evil oppressor and innocent victim. where have i heard this one before#wish i saw more atheistic jews getting mad about that honestly imagine someone using your marginalized identity#as a bludgeoning tool against your lived experience and beliefs.#bc were also not yet ready to admit atheism is something you can be marginalized for. bc if i say that if i say#ive faced religious discrimination for my atheism i would be accused of appropriating the struggles of real religious minorities#you know like that jewish atheist who only ever gets shit for the jewish thing which is the real thing and not the atheist thing#which is a fake thing. did i mention talking about them in this way is inclusive and respectful? just wanted to remind you#and listen i fucking hate christians but even I KNOW some of the shit said on here blanketly about christianity is entirely fake#some of you people sound like the chick who thinks the catholic church made up the roman empire#point being. whyd you include that in your fucking post. could have been a good post i agreed with whyd#you open the door like that to a flood of people using this as the new reason atheism is illegitimate and should be beaten out of people#lest they become annoying online. whyd you gotta include those people why make it a question of should we respect atheism? LOL
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I feel so dumb. Either way I'm dumb
I either just realized that all the art of Wally with a hand coming out of his mouth is about the fact that he's a puppet and that's what's controlling him. OR I just totally made this up am just reaching and it's not that deep
#welcome home#wally darling#im not imagining this right#????#it never occured to me cause the original art from clown the hand is like wrapped around his head#facing backwards than a puppeteers hand should be#but i just saw someones art and the hand was bursting out and facing the right way#and it clicked
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Spamton being 'small but still adult human sized' in canon is never going to NOT be funny to me
#that makes him so much scarier tbh cause he IS a puppet#just imagine a ventriloquist dummy the size of a person running at you at high speeds to scam you and take your wallet#cursed#basically everyone's height in canon is Cursed. Jevil's even taller than Spamton#everyone's like 'ooh tiny clown' ma'am that clown is 5'8#and then Rouxls and the Addisons are like 7+ feet tall. it's just bad#Deltarune#the Addisons might be a little shorter than that I never saw anyone do a height comparison but#I think they're around Rouxls sized?
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https://uquiz.com/quiz/YC0tLj?p=4035460
Well, can't say I'm surprised in the slightest.
#no matter how cheerful i try to be the test still saw me right through lmao#i actually thought about it (i.e. which character feels the most relatable etc) before#and also arrived to the conclusion that i'm probably the closest to Lunge#...especially if Lunge was also trying to somewhat imitate Grimmer (with varying levels of success lol)#man just fucking imagine that#damn i should try to draw Lunge trying to LARP as Grimmer as he was trying to do with Tenma#Grimmer's smile on Lunge's face would probably look horrifying#but anyway clowning aside#Lunge and Grimmer as characters actually made me realize quite a lot about myself and the way i interact with the world#it sure was a paradigm shift in my self-perception but it was nice to finally pinpoint some things that felt quite confusing before#again thank you urasawa for the food for thoughts#anyway back to food screenshots posting or whatever it is that i usually do here#c
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