#im very bad at not taking these things personally im sure its primarily a me issue but

[sewer-sermon]

sucks 2 be in a fandom where ppl r literally so unnecessarily vitriolic n mean abt ur favorite character but Literally whatever im having fun n playing toys

[thegreatyin]

Your posts about Fallen London are slowly tempting me into playing it- do you have any tips to start or is it best to play it completely blind?

i have a few tips and tricks! mind you im far from a veteran and i basically got my hand held by tumblr for most of the game so take everything with a grain of salt. you can and should do whatever you want always. i don't personally play it blind, but you may get more enjoyment out of it if you do, and that's awesome and im super happy for you. this is what i can say from experience:

take your time with it. this is like. the numero uno fallen london tip. it's not a game where you rush to the end in a week. it's a game where you do 10-minute-intervals of a marathon to the end in maybe a few months if you know what you're doing. spending money on action refills usually isn't worth it when you can just mosey on through neathly life one storylet at a time. a vast majority of the game's content is completely free to everyone, and while the monthly subscription options are pretty neat and let you play some exclusive story stuff (that can be pretty fire- cricket anyone basically defined the scoundrel's entire character) none of it is required and 99% of the time you aren't missing out on anything by just taking your time and exploring the neath at your own pace.

you need to raise all of your skills eventually! this is, uh. something im horribly guilty of not following myself. you can (and probably should) pick at least two stats to focus on for your character (most of the time these will be your main ambition stats, aka the closest thing FL has to a main story questline) but eventually you Will be expected to have them all at around the 100 range, minimum. for certain Super Late-game Story Content, watchful 200 is mandatory to start it, so if you have trouble choosing i'd recommend leveling that bad boy first. don't neglect your other stats though!!! don't be like me. don't be like my poor poor neglected shadowy and dangerous. it's too late for me. save yourself.

friends are fun and free and you are legally mandated to exploit them for fun and profit. okay you really aren't mandated to exploit your FL friends list but you totally should anyway just for goofy sillies. to be less jokey about it, while fallen london is primarily a single-player gaming experience, the playerbase is super friendly and super open to helping each other out (especially new players!). go on reddit, ask around on tumblr, get yourself a few buddies and use them as resources to gain items and stats and menace reduction i mean. valued companions that im sure you will treasure forever and definitely not backstab to publish that inflammatory newspaper article you've been cooking up.

on a very loosely similar note, the fallen london wiki is your best friend. yes, we're following stardew rules with this one. this is the kind of game best optimally played with a wiki article or three open in the neighboring tabs so you can follow along and know what is what. there's tons of guides on basically every part of FL, and it's no shame at all to reach out to either it or the wider community if you get stuck or feel lost at something.

if an in-game storylet has bold text, it will never lie to you! except for when it does. but that's very very very rare. you can always trust the bold text. it is always your friend. i prommy. which brings us neatly into our next bulletpoint,

seeking the name is ill-advised because it's the only storyline that can permanently brick your account at its conclusion. don't worry, the ease at which you can avoid this is practically comical, and the game will Always give you multiple chances to opt-out if you somehow accidentally start it anyway. most people make a dedicated alt character entirely for the purpose of sacrificing them to the well of doom. unless you're playing with your eyes closed for multiple months straight, you'll never run into SMEN without deliberately chasing it, and if you somehow get to that point honestly man just ignore this entire bulletpoint and see how far the rabbithole goes. go on. it's friendly :)

batfucking is always the right answer to any problem ever

echoes/the game's standard currency should always be thought of as a method of gaining items rather than a strict hoard of video game dollars. money-making can be super difficult in the earlygame, but it gets exponentially easier as you go further on. you shouldn't be afraid to sell anything you don't need, though personally i'd recommend keeping an "insurance stock" of the most basic items just in case. this includes rostygold, moon-pearls, honey droplets, etc. by-and-large, these are the easiest items to get in a pinch, and it usually isn't worth buying them from the bazaar when you can otherwise get them naturally through other methods around london. once you've got a good lodgings setup and feel decently familiar with the earlygame zones and their options, you should aim to have at minimum 1,000 of these bad boys on hand at any given time, then feel free to sell any excess you make for some quick cash in a pinch.

menaces aren't as bad as you may think, but be wary of specifically suspicion! the four main menace qualities you'll encounter in the earlygame are nightmares, wounds, scandal, and suspicion. when one of these menace stacks reach 8, you'll automatically be trapped in a unique location corresponding to whatever menace you raised too high and will have to spend time working your way out. some (nightmares and wounds) tend to fly-by rather quickly, while others (scandal and suspicion) tend to take a bit longer to get out of. none of these mean the end of your playthrough or your character, and some quests even require you to visit certain menace-exclusive locations! there are tons of items and ways to reduce menaces and keep yourself out of Situations such as these, but suspicion in particular is probably the only menace you should avoid maxing At All Costs. when your suspicion gets too high and you get sent to its special menace zone too often, you build up a criminal record that makes it harder to reduce suspicion in the future. fortunately, suspicion is the only menace with this gimmick, and before this record gets too high it's just as easy to keep row as the rest of the lot. TLDR, death from wounds is easy to escape from, but avoiding the strongarm of the law is substantially more annoying and inconvenient.

or you could be like tumblr user @with-bells-upon, who's apparently avoided death at all costs and apparently hasn't died once in the entire several months they've been playing. i don't even know how they've gotten this far without doing that. it's kind of impressive, kind of funny. especially since their ambition is one the few requiring you to die to proceed. this isn't a piece of advice i just wanted to affectionately call them out because what the heck

speaking of ambitions, pick the ambition that's right for you! ambitions are the biggest overarching questline in the game, and their requirements and rewards span the entire neath and occasionally even beyond. all four ambitions are meant to be started early and last well into the mid and late game. outside of a certain special situation regarding the light fingers ambition (the only ambition that explicitly lies to you in-game when describing its premise) you can't change your ambition without spending money, so choose carefully and choose well. they're all (mostly) equally rewarding and equally fulfilling adventures that will define your player character and your journey through the neath. there's tons of advice and spoiler-free summaries of each ambition online, so i won't cover it all here. just do your research (or don't, if you prefer) and follow your heart. maybe playing the world's most high-stake poker game ever speaks to you. maybe you want to commit a murder. maybe you want to commit a murder in the name of justice and/or revenge. maybe you just want a really really big really really shiny rock. all can be found in the neath, and all shall (eventually) be well.

if you buy 400 lucky weasels you get a special achievement. i don't need to say more.

make up a guy. this is another legal mandate if you're a fallen london player. you have to make up your own little sicko victorian london guy and roleplay them while you play. trust me. it's fun. it's free. they're going to haunt you forever. the scoundrel got a nickname like 4 months ago and ever since my mind has never known peace.

and probably most important of all, fallen london might not be the game for you, and that's okay. it includes a lot of reading. and grinding. and i do mean a lot of reading and grinding. particularly the latter, which tends to throw people off the most out of anything. it's a very niche game for a very niche audience and getting into it can be an acquired taste at the best of times. but when you do get into it, it's some Really good writing and Really in-depth worldbuilding and the most fun you'll ever have imagining sicko victorian guys running around building train stations and railway tracks directly to hell. take your time, have fun, and most important of all, always look to love.

anyway yeah that's my fallen london tips and tricks list isn't it really short and comprehendible

[libelelle]

Oughhh that reminds me. An old idea I had that I still like is Silver being taken in by Team Dark during Rivals, how do you think they would get along, and how do you think Silver would be changed by primarily being around them?

Oh thats tough... a question that requires me to think about team dark and their characterization as well as silvers... these arw my thoughts that i managed to gather up 🫡

The biggest and easiest change i can think of would be his views on morality. His black and white thinking would not do him a lot of favors hanging around team dark. Everyone one of them has something about them that would clash with Silvers views. There good and theres bad and then theres Team Dark, the people who welcomed him and took him in but dont act like a how good people should... theyre unnecessarily violent, they steal, they lie and they dont do it because they have to, they do it because its who they are, and they wont compromise that for others comfort. His first change would be readjusting his views on what makes a person good, and whether that matters as much as he thought. As for what that change looks like, Team Dark is big on loyalty, and Silver doesnt do things in halves. I think more likely than him shifting his definition of morality, he like. Shifts the focus of thats sense of justice, from the focus being morality to loyalty. If that makes sense. I think itd be easier for him than rewriting his rules for whats good and bad, or trying to wrap his head around moral grayness.

Either way, loyalty would become a focus for him, hes part of a team now. Not that he isnt loyal as he is normally, he just hasnt had anyone by his side, fight for him and with him all the time. Not since blaze anyways. Obviously because hes such an extreme person, slights against his team would probably get explosive reactions, something omega would encourage. Unhelpfully. Itd take some time for him to understand the dynamics between his new team and the rest of their friends, particularly with Sonic.

As for individual relationships, i might have to think about this in detail more, but im sure he'd find Omegas uncomplicated nature... not relaxing, but easy. Hes predicatable. Once hes gotten used to them theyd make a very destructive duo, i dont really believe Silver cared much about "property damage" and "reckless behaviour" before going to the past.

Silvers relationship with shadow... this one is so hard for me it always has been. I thinkkkkkkkk that Silver would be like. Overly eager to prove himself to shadow. From silvers point of view shadow is cool, powerful, self assured...basically someone to look up to. As a memeber of team dark i think he'd look to Shadow for approval, whereas Shadow might feel a bit. Crowded by him. Especially at first, throwing silver into the mix is strange. This all being said id reallly have to think hard about this, just because their relationship isnt something i fewl confident i understand.

The member of team dark hed have the most troubles with with be Rouge though. Shes a spy a thief, and she keeps secrets. Shes not an easy person to read and that stresses him out. He doesnt dislike her, he just cant figure her out. The whole morality thing would be especially tough with her because of it i think. He still holds those values, i think, so her whole deal would get his mind running laps. Other than that though i think theyd have a good relationship, i think shed like his fire

Generally i think Silvers personality would be similiar, less naive maybe, definitely not getting any less destructive. Hed probably take on a role of the bleeding heart more often than you'd think though, just because no one else would.

[prettyboykatsuki]

the hsr swarm person: im level 66 which is why im so confused why im suffering so much; using my gorjus maxed out jingyuan, luocha 6/8/8/8 + all traces unlocked, seele with an honestly really bad build and preservation mc for survival who also isnt the best

im leveling up il dan heng rn but i have NO destruction mats and even less light cone level up mats so i guess we'll be grinding

so i guess a good team then would be ildh luocha and who else??

ALSO TYSM FOR HELPING<3

take my words w a grain of salt because i've really only managed to clear level three a few times and almost beat difficulty 4 but i would assume the main issues is that you need to spend your resources on a preservation unit and debuffer / support.

for jy ESPECIALLY because he's very vulnerable to crowd control. your preservation MC is viable but i'd recommend march 7th over them (or gepard if you managed to get him). a lot of the content in swarm will want to oneshot you so damage mitigation is more important than healing in my experience.

(which makes sense because fu xuan is next and her entire kit is damage mitigation but kjfdksd i digress)

i would say with your current team, drop seele off of your team and use luocha primarily for breaking imaginary shield. replace seele with a semi-built debuffer or support (the best option for both JY and DH IL is tingyun, but pela is also very viable for both. asta also works very well but more for jy than dh il. yukong is Fine but her kit is imo tricky and shes also kind of skill point greedy)

so for team comp recc jing yuan, flex support / debuff (tingyun works best for jy and dh il, as does pela.) / preservation / shielder / luocha.

for dh il i use dh il, tingyun AND pela, and then gepard for best results

after that - it's mostly about choosing the correct path for you based on your team comps. i don't have a lot of experience with elation path in swarm but i hear it does well for jy so you'd have to try it.

you can use destruction path for dh il since you have luocha but i do not use it much since i think it works better for self-sustain characters and i find it very tricky to use. its not impossible but its kind of a suicide mission since it mostly focuses on hp consumption.

me personally, i universally always go for the preservation or remembrance paths, abundance also works very well for this. preservation is preferred for me since i have a crazy stacked gepard lmao. mix preservation with some healing or debuffing blessings and it basically keeps you alive no matter what

remembrance (aka freeze path) is also pretty good because well. it freezes everything and if something is frozen it cannot hurt you but it only works if you have someone like pela, march or geppie.

abundance works well but you have luocha so it might not be as necessary for you. still i would say the blessings for abundance in swarm are wayyy better than the normal SU. it's kind of up to you

either way, always try to go for things that contribute to your path though because once you hit max you can combine paths as well and get more bonuses. having a lot of path resonance is good.

ALSO MAKE SURE YOU READ EACH BLESSING CAREFULLY!! i know that is obvious but its a good reminder. understanding exactly what stats you have can make or break your run i find

also and this is just my personal experience but i will always choose curios over blessings if i have a chance because i think curios have better universal effects. blessings can be random but curious are imo more consistent.

i hope this helps!! i can give more advice if anyone wants specifically because clearing swarm is very dependent on ur actual account but i do pretty regularly clear difficult content in game!!!

[ahaura]

my thoughts about character/reader fics are as follows:

firstly want to preface this by saying my feelings may stem from 1) growing up primarily on ffnet where certain types of formats were not allowed iirc (ex: second person POV, choose your own adventure) and so if people wanted to make a self-insert they had to make an oc like everyone else 2) it possibly being a genuine new creative wave that i am not familiar with or 3) following/coming alongside the implementation and popularity of tiktok or 4) something else

secondly i want to say that i have been writing for years & wholeheartedly support OCs whether they're general OCs or self-inserts i think for the most part if there's a sandbox you can build castles in go for it yk?

thirdly i do. wholeheartedly. and entirely. understand wish-fulfillment. i am not a wish-fulfillment or fantasy or fun-having hater. im genuinely not

HOWEVER. it feels like in the last few years? couple years? last year???? there has been a MAJOR uptick/flood of reader/character fics in literally every aspect of fandom like you simply cannot escape it. it's in every single tag for almost every single movie for so many characters. which. like. is annoying for people not into it but i'm not saying, like, it's harmful. annoying =/= bad.

i love my fellow writers i love people reading i love people having fun etc etc etc

all those disclaimers being said. i am SO unbelievably tired of them in a way i have not been tired of a trend in fandom in a very long time. (and im talking about a trend rather than a serious issue.)

i DO think that it requires effort to write reader/character fics. however my beef with them is that they are effectively one-size-fits-all cardboard cut-out wish-fulfillment slots. the goal SEEMS TO ME to maximize engagement. to fulfill the wishes and fantasies of as many people as humanly possible. but the thing is... there is no one-size fits all. there are undoubtedly people who cannot squeeze themselves into the cutout made by the writer.

and moreover i don't think that is the funnest thing to write. is it WRONG to write it? no. is it BAD? no! but i simply wish. that more people would not focus as much as pleasing as many people as humanly possible with their writing and instead do what fulfills THEM. and i don't mean in the "how many comments/how much engagement" you get. i mean, what creatively stimulates you.

that doesnt mean this doesnt require creativity or that some people dont geuninely enjoy writing them. im not saying that.

what im SAYING is that i am SICK of seeing it everywhere and i would ENCOURAGE these writers to TAKE CHANCES! i personally do not find a blank-slate cutout appealing!!!!!! i love, love, love OCs!!!! whether they're general or self-inserts! i love it when writers take chances, when they give their characters defined/explicit traits and personalities! im sick to death of this "y/n" bullshit give me a name give me a general appearance give me an attitude give me a past give me SOMETHING - for lack of a better word - REAL!!!!!! something with meat! something i can chew on!

I WANT WRITERS TO COMMIT! NOT EVERYONE WILL LIKE IT BUT NOT EVERYONE IS MEANT TO! ITS OK TO MAKE SOMETHING THAT SOME PEOPLE WONT VIBE WITH! that's just how art goes!!!!!!

i have personally tried to get into it. and it's not for me. i can say that too, my POV is definitely influenced by that. that's whatever. im not trying to make a moral argument here

second person POV is fun to write in! you can write (OC or not) in it if you want to! it's atool like any other! use it!

i am just. SOSOSOSOSOSO sick of seeing it EVERYWHERE and while im sure it is genuinely creative and stimulating for some people it just feels so. game-ified like those tiktoks that are like "POV: im you're s/o" or whatever like there's nothing WRONG with it but i DO think that sooooo many people are missing out on both the reading And the writing aspect! stories are not SUPPOSED to be "one size fit all!" the goal of art, IN MY OPNION, should not be to maximize engagement! and also WHY is it in every tag cant you guys like make a separate sight for it. ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mekatrio]

what are ur biggest gripes with the way the current fandom characterizes the mekatrio? besides like. oversimplifying seto and stuff. asking bc ur the no. 1 expert imo & i want to hear ur thoughts

tq for this ask and giving me a reason to blabber abt the mekatrio 😏 but also aw you dont want me to talk about seto mischaracterization for the nth time? :( im joking lol, and also im not quite sure what ur quantifying by 'current fandom' so im just gonna go over whatever recent portrayals ive seen from both english and non-english speaking fans 👍 with seto stuff excluded ofc bc i have a whole tag for tht.

my general gripes with overall mekatrio portrayal:

- perpetuating the incorrect notion that the mekatrio were adopted by the tateyamas. they werent, this was a mistranslation by the official translators. the terms used throughout kgpr to describe their relationship to the tateyamas has always been 'fostered'. and ofc, ive only seen this happen in english-speaking spaces (bc i primarily engage with the english-speaking fanbase, and we often work from the translations and not the direct text).

another issue i take with this is that ive seen some english-speaking fans express their dismay at the fact that the mekatrio were only ever fostered, as though adoption wouldve been 'better'. this is something i find very troubling, bc the vibe i get is that theyre implying adoption is like, more intimate, more 'valuable', in a sense, than merely being fostered. and it feels very rooted in their own cultural understanding of fostering/adopting kids, whatever their culture may be.

to me, this feels like a very insensitive view to have, bc the matter of fostering and adopting children is way more complex than "adoption > fostering". adopting a child is more than just making them a part of your family, its about legally and materially severing the bonds between a child and their birth parents. its bc of this nuance that adoption is uncommon in several countries, like japan, and is also why adoption is forbidden in islam. this is also why adoption has been used as a tool of genocide. im not trying to say that 'adoption is evil and bad and its good that the mekatrio werent adopted' etc etc etc, but i wish fans would consider the different cultural aspects of this matter b4 speaking about it.

- having the mekatrio use their first names with each other. eruhefjksjfhjks... its not like completely wrong to do or anything, but i just find it so weird, bc they literally only ever do this with one another in the anime. in the manga and novels, they hv never referred to one another by their first names at any point in time. never!!! when they first meet each other, after being fostered together, after ayaka dies, after ayano dies, and during the present day plot, they have always consistently referred to one another by their last names. the mekatrio using their first names with one another has always been an Anime-Exclusive Thing. so i find it weird that fans hv adopted this tidbit into their overall kgpr interpretation, when its something that's only exclusive to the anime. it would be like if someone adopted mca azami's massive fucking house into their interpretation, or kido still wearing the clothes she died in at the tateyama residence, which are two other weird things that are anime-exclusive.

also this is just my personal headcanon/interpretation, but i would imagine that the mekatrio using their last names with one another would hv a deeper underlying meaning, considering that the three of them are orphans, and have lost the people they had shared these family names with.

- shipping the mekatrio with one another. this is a no-brainer, i dont really think i need to explain this one. its way less common in english-speaking spaces than it used to be, but unfortunately its still just as popular in japanese spaces, knkd being the most prominent one 😑

- denying that theres knkd in canon texts. andd this is smth ive only seen in english-speaking spaces. ive seen some fans make it seem as though there isnt any romantic knkd implications in canon, and that the shippers are just weird and delusional, but as much as id also like for that to be the case, it unfortunately isnt true 😮‍💨 chp 38 of the manga very strongly implies that kano has a crush on kido, and kano's pov in novel 8 practically confirms this. and im too lazy to find proof of this, but i remember there used to be some fans (back in like 2016 - 2019) who believed that the knkd in the manga was just satou mahiro's doing, but no, the manga manuscripts were written by jin, meaning that entire stupid convo between kano and mary in chp 38 was completely jin's doing. this means that, yes, kano does (unfortunately) canonly hv a crush on kido.

now, just bc this is canon, doesnt mean i expect ppl to respect or adhere to it. i sure as hell dont, and i never will, the same way i wont ever respect hibiya's extremely dehumanizing obsession with hiyori, or the very questionable manner that shintaro's fetishes are handled. but its irksome to see people spread the idea that it doesnt even exist, and that the shippers are deluding themselves instead, bc that essentially absolves jin of his very real and very shitty writing. like the truth of the matter is that it very much exists, which fucking sucks, but we can disregard it the same way we disregard the other shitty aspects of kgpr. but we shouldnt act like it doesnt exist at all bc 1.) gotta hold jin accountable for his shit, and 2.) it does a disservice to newer fans who may then think this rancid shit doesnt exist in kgpr, when in reality it does. with that said, the shippers are still fucking weird for shipping it. just cuz theres canon romantic knkd implications, doesnt suddenly make all the familial context surrounding them disappear. both the shippers And jin deserve shit for supporting this nasty shit 😑

my gripes with kido specifically

- portraying her as blushy blushy shy tsun tsun AHHHHH WHATEVER BULLSHIT. i see this happen very often w non-english speaking fans. i hate when people draw her all flustered and blushing in a humiliating context. i hate it when she's drawn in a skirt or any feminine clothing. i hate all of that shit... it feels very voyeuristic and misogynistic to treat a female character who uses a masculine pronoun and presents herself androgynously in such a manner. its disgusting. and i hope that all the writers and artists who do this di-*a truck drives past*

- overlooking kido's autistic-coding in favor of projection. now this is a gripe i have specifically with the english-speaking fanbase. this fandom has a tendency to project traits onto characters, traits which are only very loosely based in canon, if not at all. im not gonna beat around the bush; im mainly talking about how fans project their sexuality/gender/neurodivergency/other identity marker headcanons onto characters. this is not unique to the kgpr fandom, nor is it a recent occurrence. people have been doing this type of thing all the way back in like 2013 - 2014, and i used to do this too, but grew out of it as i got older.

im not saying this is a bad thing to do. i understand the merits and joy that comes from it, and that it's something thats essentially harmless. but what i do take issue with is that fans will project all sorts of traits onto characters with little to no basis in canon, but will then overlook characters who are actually coded a certain way. what im talking abt specifically is kido's autistic-coding. she doesnt just have one or two autistic traits which a person could then headcanon her as autistic. no, in canon, she is very much and very downright autistic-coded. since she was a child, she canonly had difficulties communicating, to the point where she needed to see a doctor;

she uses music as a way to disconnect from her senses;

her difficulties with communicating comes out in the form of aggression towards others;

and she's 'eccentric': wearing multiple layers in the blazing summer, speaking bluntly and honestly at all times, using non-standard pronouns for herself, and the list goes on and on... and like Never Lost Word is literally a whole song about her struggles with communication. all of these behaviors are reminiscent of a person with autism, which itself is a communication disorder. if she isnt autistic-coded, then i dont know what is.

but yeah, it annoys me when people project traits onto characters with little to no basis in canon, but then overlook characters who are actually canonly coded with a certain trait, like kido. like it feels ridiculous to me when a fan like, looks for characters they can project neurodivergency onto, but then ignore the actual neurodivergent-coded characters. if youre going to talk at all about these characters' identities, then can you please not overlook kido's very autistic-coded identity... thank you...

my gripes with kano specifically

- saying that kano has it the worst out of the mekatrio. hahahaha...... my main problem with this idea of 'kano has it worst' is that its often coming from people who are either ignoring, disregarding, or dont fully know about kido's and seto's backstories. and i get why this is the case, kido's and seto's backstories are almost entirely novel-exclusive, and most ppl dont read the novels. not to mention that their songs, Mekakushi Code, Never Lost Word, and Shounen Brave, are way more optimistic than the mental breakdown that is Yobanashi Deceive. but in spite of how things may seem on the surface, all three of them have had it pretty bad in the past, and still have it pretty bad in the present day plot. just a brief summary of their traumatic backstories (taken from the novels, but it applies to most routes):

kano: had a physically abusive mom growing up, and was murdered alongside with her. was passed from home to home, and had the police called on him bc of his powers. was discarded into a facility. his new mom passes away. his sister tells him that their father is possessed and plans to kill their entire family, and asks him to go to school in her place. she later kills herself in front of him, and he is made to masquerade as her corpse. he is then blackmailed into secretly working for his possessed father for the next two years.

kido: her birth mother passes away. she gets whisked into living with her father and stepsister whom she had never met before. she lives with them for at least 7 months, and in this time she is never let out of the residence, and is stuck with servants who berate her and look down on her. her father then drugs her and her stepsister, locks them inside of the basement, murders all of the servants, prepares the house to be destroyed, and then comes downstairs to kill her stepsister. kido has to kill him in self-defense. the house then burns down, killing her and her stepsister. for the rest of her life, she uses concealing eyes on herself without realizing it, in order to repress the traumatic memories of her father. she gets discarded into a facility. much later in life, she lose a mother and sister once again.

seto: grew up in a facility where he was ostracized and bullied by children who were cruel enough to kill a dog. died alongside said dog. spent over a year in this facility all alone, listening to the thoughts of these cruel children who hated him. later in life, he learns that him and his family would be murdered in the future, and never shares this burden with anyone. his mom passes away. he learns his father is possessed and plans to murder the entire family, but again, never confides this to anyone. his sister kills herself.

so like... can you really say that kano has it the worst? if you still think so after knowing all this, then thats fine. but please evaluate kido's and seto's backstories properly if youre going to say so... 🙏

- misunderstanding kano's powers. specifically, saying that:

1.) his powers are cancelled out by pain, and

2.) he mastered his powers earlier than kido and seto.

im planning to write a more detailed post about kano's powers some other day, so ill keep it very brief here. but regarding point 1, in the present day plot at least, its very explicitly stated in 'Today, On The Street' from novel 5 that no, pain no longer cancels out kano's powers:

as for point 2... this is difficult to disprove without going on an insanely long tangent, so.... i wont do that. and will instead just leave these panels from chp 27 here:

^official translation on the left and fan translation on the right. im putting two translation to show that yes, kano is really saying that, in his youth, his powers have a tendency to act out of his control. just like kido's and seto's.

yeah, im aware im not really disproving those two points that much here... but its like i said, to do that, id need to explain loads of things, things which i plan to explain in a seperate and more detailed post about kano's powers. his powers are a lot more complex than it initially seems. once i finish that post, ill update this answer and link it here.

- depicting kano as a sociable and outgoing guy. he is not!! he's very shy!

^fan translation by fuyuyuu. pic is takane, kano, and seto speaking in that order

he is merely playing as a character who is sociable and outgoing. but he is lying! he is very shy! he is yobanashi deceiving you!

- i dont like kanoshin lol. dont get me wrong, i completely get why ppl would ship them. like i always burst out laughing whenever i reread novel 7, cuz i always end up seeing how gay these fuckers are acting:

^like seriously, in what world is this not meant to be taken in a romantically homosexual context 😭 no cuz help me i feel like throwing up from laughter WHAT IS THISFJSDLK

with that said, i still dont like kanoshin bc 1.) i simply dont think theyre a good pair, and 2.) i think the resentment in their dynamic was poorly resolved. i have many issues with the way shintaro as a protagonist is handled throughout kgpr (especially in the novels), as he is often overshadowing other characters Because He Is The Protagonist. and my dislike of kanoshin's dynamic has to do with that. also another thing i dislike abt the fandom's portrayal of kanoshin, is that i dont like it when ppl make it seem more toxic than it actually is. like i wish they had a spicy feud with one another, but no, novel 7 has made it so they forgive each other like... immediately. which im not a fan of, but oh well. but ultimately im not too bothered by what kanoshin fans are doing, bc ive had kanoshin blacklisted for the past 4 years and it will continue to remain that way 👍

and yeah! thats my list of gripes with the kgpr fanbase's characterization of the mekatrio! (excluding seto). its very short and not at all immensely detailed because i am soooo normal about these characters (lying). theres probably a few things i missed like little 'they would not fucking say that' type of things, but i think these are my main gripes. yippee!

^visual representation of how the fandom cares more abt kano than seto & kido

[lumalalu]

if i do not ruin my hair right now i will die

[brawlqueen]

Selective, Canon Divergent Mizuki Date formerly, Mizuki Okiura,                                 of  AI: The Somnium Files Series.

Exploring subjects of: Grief, Never Having a Childhood, Piecing Broken pieces together, Living with a broken heart, Unflinching courage and desire to be kind even with a mouth full of teeth, Love with nowhere to go but searching all the same, Innocence Lost, Choosing your own family, loss, trauma, abandonment and coping / lack of coping with abuse while discovering who you, yourself are. Friendship and coming into your own self and learning slowly but surely what genuine love really means when it’s given. Not everything is a battle. Not everyone is an enemy who will hurt you, you won’t always be alone. Beating up old perverts and bad guys though? 

.....With your overpowered strength you’re definitely alone on that one.

                                                                  may you grow healthy and happy.

Written by Lily 25+, she/her, minors dni / personals dni, rules WIP! SPOILERS AHEAD!

RULES.

Thanks a ton for reading this now bear with me as I get this out if the way! Please call me Lily, and it’s nice to meet you!

Out of Character p.sd by ariapsds / supersources!

Minors and personals dni please. Reblogs from personals / non roleplay blogs will result in a block.

I will have various routes or verses and am completely open to crossovers! I tend to cherry pick AINI as I have my own gripes with it, but still very much enjoyed its improvements in some areas, and pitfalls in others. So I’ll follow things to a point but also do my own thing, so please be patient with me. I also will adapt my canon about it with other AITSF roleplayers so we can meet a middle ground as we all likely have some divergencies and our own takes!

Communication is really important to me! I primarily use discord, so please feel free to IM me, if we hit it off, because you will 99.9 percent find me there for plotting, chatting and just chilling out. Also I tend to initiate as best I can, but while there’s no due date on ooc replies, I do tend to wait a little bit if there’s no reply for a while, since I figure as we all have lives, I don’t wanna burden the person I’m chatting with! That said, please always feel comfortable to let me know about something you want to talk about in our writing, our messages, or keeping or dropping threads. It really, truly, genuinely won’t hurt my feelings. I’m not weighing your interactions / speed or judging you.

Mizuki may look simply short and sharp-tongued, but her superhuman/supernatural strength is on another level. In both ability, regenerative properties and sheer agility, strength to lift and crush things, jump, leap, survive, endurance etc, is far beyond what a human being could or should, really. This of course is elaborated on down my rules but do not underestimate her as I will not hold her back, she is ridiculously overpowered and it is NOT EASY to take her down as we don’t know her full capacities since she grows stronger each year of her life, but certainly not impossible at all for her to lose we just gotta plot it out! plotting is always always encouraged, naturally! just think of her as some weird unstoppable weapon of a detective, sci-fi series. She is not afraid to fight whatsoever to defend her loved ones and innocent people, and for now, is just focusing on not breaking a mug from sheer grip. I do follow the Horadori Institute Genome Editing, but minus Mizuki being a clone, and it’s elaborated below. 

Crossovers are awesome, I said it before that you don’t have to have a muse from the Somnium Files to be welcomed here, OCs and Multimuse blogs are just as important. I can be selective but really I love just about any interactions of all kinds!

I think it’s safe to say since I’ll be having a lot of verses, that I will be making sure Mizuki, without being spoiler heavy, is given the spotlight I felt she deserved far more than she got. I also firmly will have verses where her father figure, imperfect but very loved by her, trauma issues aside, is mentioned as being present in her life because let’s face it both were done extremely dirty after the Mizuki route, which I felt should have been canon at least in the relationship set up, transferred to Resolution Route as the canon end in the OG. It isn’t so much that these two are my favorite family unit, but that they were nerfed so badly back to square one in this game, that it hurt the story quite a bit and Mizuki already has gone through way too much to have that on her shoulders also, and frankly Date, if you know you know, didn’t really deserve that. 

Some verses though he will be involved in the Explosion route instead of a mentor figure to her in some verses, and you’ll see how Mizuki takes that. Which is to say not well at all. :’) Something we didn’t see in AINI, which is probably my biggest gripe, the nerfing of relationships / development from the first game of the characters

While I’ve looked at the tags, various places and this is the common consensus on Mizuki being a ‘clone’ it’s just not gonna be a thing here nor is Bibi. That completely nerfs any of her development, takes away the message of ‘found family’ so heavily themed in the original game, AITSF, and pretty much takes away her identity as a solid character in it, and also retcons a lot of what happened with her biological family. I will have ideas and try to figure out her ‘superhuman strength / combat ability’. I’ll follow along with the Horadori Institute experimenting on her as a baby, but not to make a clone.

Something like Shoko, who repeatedly calls Mizuki abnormal etc, to Date, maybe saw an opportunity while she was a baby to see if she could ‘fix’ her, and that’s how Chikara got a hold of her in some verses. Not even for prestige or connections, just desperation and a likely unstable mind wanting to fix a child she frankly never wanted. I don’t know what other Mizuki blogs are doing about this if there are any, so I’ll try to keep brainstorming but for me, unless there is a good reason, the main detractor of Mizuki’s protag status / relevance in the story is Bibi, and trust me, I love Bibi dearly as she really grew on me as a character and I wish she was better utilized -- and I saw Marco!

Some verses like in AISTF, I’ll have Mizuki’s god like OP superhuman abilities never explained. Other times? She’ll never lose her eye and just decide to be a detective to avenge her Dad and Kizuna and everyone who got hurt without having an AI-ball.

Most of the time for continuum, she has lost her left eye, despite Date’s best efforts and the others, and will probably post game share Aiba with Date, as if there is an AI3, I’d like someone made for Mizuki herself, if she appears again. Which I sure hope she does, even though Aiba is her family too, and they do get along well together, as Aiba takes the seat as a more nurturing, protective figure for someone made of seaweed.

Mizuki is not sugary sweet. She is traumatized back to back to back. I will not sugar coat themes of abuse in all its forms, neglect from parents, the negative reactions from trauma that for Mizuki, never seems to end, and the slow journey of accepting a parent that chose you out of love even if he’s imperfect and doesn’t always make the best choices with her, the point is, one person in the world tries, and it’s Date. I borrow a lot from the Mizuki route even if their relationship seemed to go backwards in Res route.

So Mizuki essentially is very much bite and fight. She’s snarky, she can be rude, she’s mature beyond any preteen or teenager should be, she’s fiercely protective of her loved ones, she’s guarded and cagey around affection or compliments, she’s angry, very angry, and also very kind. She’s a broken girl trying to find out where she fits and the pain of her life never seems to end, something continued in Nirvana Initiative. I want to explore all these traits and feelings negative or positive, but be warned, she’s more likely to verbally eviscerate a muse or be her guarded, but actually genuinely kind self, buried beneath layers of trauma just as much.

Note that a lot of themes in this game, as Mizuki is a detective in her teens, more aptly put a Pysncer / Special Agent, that I do not reflect beliefs or opinions of everything my character does, as we are both separate individuals. While I can empathize with Mizuki for personal reasons, that hardly means the premise of the story or base foundations or plots or actions of the characters I necessarily condone.

Honestly a lot of my verses you’ll see more detail and info on what’s going on in each as I want to have lots of ideas with her! I want her to get what I felt she didn’t in AINI despite also seeing some positive things also! 

No drama, bullying, homophobia, transphobia, bigotry, racism, drama, godmodding / meta-gaming etc. If I don’t see someone acting like a decent human being or fair it’s a bye from me.

Also all icons coloring psd wise were by sunnypsds, promo, icon border and header done by @ganymakes​ / @colnerys​ (DO NOT STEAL PLEASE) and the caps are all done by me. Please do not steal! 

I know this is a lot, but thanks a ton if you read even half, I really appreciate it. I hope we can have tons of fun together and don’t be a stranger!

important links: stance on mizuki’s portrayal / storyline changes.

blogroll:  @goldspun​ + ind. selective, fandom friendly oc.                          highly selective / low activity:            @unvergangliche​ + ind. selective frieren of sousou no frieren. 

[uter-us]

i see why this frustrates you! let me clarify. this isn't abt the actual action of putting the whole pot in the fridge, it's abt repeated patterns of 1 partner (primarily men) not contributing equally and claiming they just did not know when confronted, and then the other partner (primarily women) being forced into doing extra work. instead of two people in the household taking care of the household and eachother equally/equitably, one person is not pulling their weight and in turn the other is burdened with that.

im sympathetic to the fact that for some people the "claim" that they did not know is not just a claim, but actually legitimate. I imagine that's very difficult to feel misunderstood if/when your partner (or household members) think you're intentionally being inconsiderate by not helping with the groceries for example. with that said, I think it's perfectly fair for you to ask for a bit more leeway and adjustment, but ultimately it's still the responsibility of the party that's not helping as much to make sure those adjustments are known, and make sure they don't accidentally hurt the other household members.

an example of this could be saying something like "when I come into the kitchen, my brain doesnt register that there are groceries that need putting away, but if you could tell me to do them, then i'll see them and can help." (You propose a solution; you emphasize that this is unintentional; you show that do want to help, there just a barrier.)

im very sympathetic to this issue too with the putting the pot in the fridge! to me this reads as you taking someone very literally, and my dad is autistic and so he also takes things very literally as well, but we've both learned to make adjustments so things are healthy and helpful. is it unfair that for you, youre more likely to be misunderstood as "manipulative"? yes, absolutely its unfair. and simulatenously, is it unfair for other household members (although it's not disabled people's fault for being disabled), to have to have the household chores/etc distribution unbalanced? also yes. and that doesn't have to be a moral judgement on the disabled person, just recognizing both areas (+ understanding that both areas are not opposing sides because understanding someone's disabilities and making adjustments is to the benefit of both parties! it's working together!)

one last thing though, what I was talking abt in the original post (and i have a reblog somewhere in the notes) is geared towards women who repeatedly have told their partners to try to adjust and change, to please help, but are met with an unwillingness presented as incompetence. everyone is capable of change to at least some degree, and with adjustments, I'm inclined to believe that the majority of household needs can be met with practice! of course there are outliers, but generally these things can be figured out. it's the unwillingness that some people have to try and make things easier for their partner that is the upsetting part.

hopefully this clarifies, and you don't have to feel "bad" like you said! adjustments for household chores are often necessary for disabilities, and a great avenue if what needs to be done isn't getting done. take care and be safe!

there are way too many comments like this:

why must the burden of domestic labor always be w the woman

[wickedpact]

life's hecticness has finally kinda caught up to me and im just feeling super worn down and im seeking comfort in the old guard and because your blog always sparks joy ive come to you. on the subject of comfort do you have any thoughts on coping mechanisms/ways to comfort themselves the members of the old guard have? and similarly, ways they help comfort the others too? i would love to hear any and all thoughts you might have on the matter <3 - 2ta

in terms of comforting others:

nicky: words. i think its kind of interesting, but every time in the movie we see as character in emotional distress nicky speaks up (its okay nile, tell us, sono qui, everything happens for a reason boss) the only time he breaks this habit is when booker talks about grief in the lab.

booker: we dont rlly see booker explicitly comfort people much but he does seem to tend towards expressions of solidarity or subtle check-ins/expressions of concern (for the former he tells nile about his family, he tells nile big wounds take longer to heal, he reminds andy that ‘this is what you wanted’ and for the latter he asks andy post-stab if shes alright, he tells andy he wont see her again, etc)

hes also quick to (rightfully lmao) accept blame (after the kill floor, when he wont get up when the squad escapes, and the scene where he and andy get captured)

joe: he doesnt do a whole lot of comforting to the non-nicky’s out there interestingly enough. he encourages andy like the others do just after the baklava scene (i know you needed a break but its been over a year boss) he also tends to make little light hearted jokes/comments to lighten the mood sometimes (this plus 'faster than the elevator', etc)

and i suppose one could say him answering nile’s questions during the dinner scene are a type of comfort in itself, tho .. .... his answers arent exactly reassuring lmao

nile: So are you good guys or bad guys?

joe: Depends on the century

(j o s e p h you could have given her a more reassuring answer than that!! altho depending on the person, straight honesty can be very comforting in of itself, and joe prolly knew that andy would dance around nile’s questions and be generally unhelpful)

but additionally joe is a pretty strong protector and worrier about his friends’ well-being. he advocates for finding nile in the train scene and tells the others to ‘cover andy’ when they find out shes mortal

(plus the little touch he does to andy’s back!)

andy: andy’s mileage varies when it comes to comforting (primarily nile of course bc shes the Distressed One in the movie) but a lot of the time she tends towards offering stability and loyalty (me and those three men in there will keep you safe, you’re one of us now we would do the same for you, [to nicky] this changes nothing) which of course makes sense for her. stability and loyalty obviously probably mean so much to andy and as Team Leader shes probably very used to offering those things

nile: nile is more the comfortee than the comforter in the movie for all the obvious reasons, tho i think its interesting that at the end she tells andy ‘youre gonna [spend the time you have left] with us, andy’ not only bc shes delivering that stability/loyalty right back at andy but also bc shes also a leader (in the marines) so she might have a similar situation as andy with offering stability & loyalty as a Leader

being comforted:

nicky: the most notable instance of nicky being upset and getting comforted is obviously the van speech, tho like ive said i doubt joe’s go-to method of comforting nicky is a Speech. tho also (obviously & as ive talked abt a lot) i think he takes a lot of comfort from the idea of destiny/fate and the idea that he and The Lads were all destined to be together. he lomves his friends and hes happy when theyre happy

booker: alcohol.

honestly im not even sure how booker would really like to be comforted/comfort himself besides his given Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms. i think he does take a lot of comfort in his Solidarity with andy tho. considering his ‘that way madness lies’ comment about the immortality and his comment in the comic about ‘whats the purpose of an uncertain immortality?’ and his tendency towards tech, i think he’s the kind of person who likes when things are explainable and logical (and u could say thats a way he foils with nicky i suppose)

joe: him touchy

ive been meaning to make a gifset thats just Joe + Reassurance Through Touch but i keep forgetting about it. hes a very tactile boyo. in the comic while theyre having the nile nightmare joe reaches out and physically grabs nicky’s arm/shoulder in his sleep, like hes subconsciously checking hes still there. he worries So Much about the others (nicky in the armored van, nile in the train scene, andy post-mortality) and their well-being that i think he takes a lot of comfort in knowing all the lads are okay and safe (esp nicky)

andy: like i mentioned i think she likes loyalty and stability, which is obvs something shes had a serious lacking of throughout her life. ik u arent super into the comics but the recent tales through time story about andy went over how she takes comfort in the idea that her axe belonged to her mother once, even if her modern-day axe has had all its parts and pieces replaced so many times its not the axe her mother gave her 7000 yrs ago anymore. however andy still clings to this idea of her axe being her mother’s axe (‘this is the labyrs she held in her hands’). the memory of her family/mother and the stability of having the same axe with her through her history obvs comforts her a lot.

nile: again similarly to andy i feel like loyalty/family comforts nile a lot. she followed her father’s footsteps into the marines and worries about her loyalties to them through the first half of the movie, and tries to go home & thinks about her mom and brother through the whole thing.

(plus, music obvs means a lot to her)

[ttlmt]

do it bee

alright.

there’s a few things i kept seeing confusion about, so i’ll try to clear it up the best i can with my amateur enthusiast knowledge. 

disclaimer: all of this could be completely wrong. this is just what i’ve learned from working as a bookseller in the past and taking a few classes on publishing and just generally doing a lot of personal research into it both as a reader and with interest in joining the industry. i do not know dan’s individual situation, nor am an expert by any means. i am also coming at this as a canadian, so the innerworkings of uk/us publishing are just from what ive learned here.

you will get through this book: 

bee’s possibly incorrect far too long guide to the publishing industry and how international editions and signed copies might work for daniel howell’s new book ‘you will get through this night’ available for preorder now

follow @daysuntilthisnight​​ for a countdown #shamelessselfpromo

1) the uk vs us edition

the uk cover is the one without dan’s face on it. the us cover is the one with dan’s face on it. its not uncommon to have multiple covers and putting someones face on the cover is a very american publisher thing to do, personally i really like both. the cover you get is dependent on where you/your country order the book from.

if you ordered from danandphilshop or shop.danielhowell, you will be getting the uk cover, as it is a uk business. if you ordered from the us store right when the book was announced and before the signed copies sold out, it will probably be the uk cover (more on that in the bit about signed books). after that, i’m not sure because i do not know how irlmerch’s distribution works. 

one thing to note is all books have an ISBN number which is like a universal barcode for the book at all stores and it comes from the publisher. the beginning of the isbn dictates the publisher/language/product type/etc and the end identifies the particular book. the uk edition and the us edition have different isbn numbers, as will the ebook, audiobook, etc. this is a good way to figure out which edition you are buying from your local bookstore, and you can cross reference with the isbn in uk or us stores. its usually listed at the bottom of the product page online.

if you live in a country besides the us or the uk, it depends whether the book is being distributed or published in your country. distribution is often more cost effective, and is usually the way it works. as far as i know, dan’s book is being distributed (not published) to the countries on this list with the exception of the us where it is being published (not distributed). if a book is being published in a country, it will have a different isbn and sometimes a different cover. if a book is being distributed it will have the same isbn and cover as the country it is distributed from (usually the closest publishing hub, so london or new york in this case).

to know what edition is in your country, you can compare the isbn numbers and/or the covers. you can also take a look at your other books to see whats normal in your country to get sort of an idea. im assuming europe will get the uk edition but im not sure about other countries.

here in canada for example, our books are usually distributed from the US meaning you will be getting the us cover if you order the book from a canadian store. i ordered from irlmerch when dan’s book was announced though, so i think im getting the uk edition.

1.5) covers and book design

most of the time, especially with new authors, the author has very little say in the final decisions re: book cover and book design. they usually get input, and the publisher gets final say. book design is also a very different thing then general graphic design and professionals genuinely go to school for this. thats not to say there arent bad book designs or that regular people can’t do it too, it’s just something to keep in mind. 

2) signed books vs signed editions

there are a few different ways that signed books can work. primarily, there are signed editions and signed books. both are physically signed by the author, the difference is when in the process these books are signed.

signed books is the ‘old-fashioned’ way, where the author will sit at a table and sign copies of their book. the author usually signs on the title page and for a long time, this was the only way to do it. they have already been printed by the publisher so they will have the same isbn as unsigned books. signed books are usually more limited, often they can be personalized, and if you have ever gone to a proper book signing where the author signed the book in front of you, you have a signed book. signed books are also sometimes made available at the authors local bookstore because they are able to sign them in person. as far as i know, the books that were ordered from danandphilshop or shop.danielhowell during the initial signed run will be signed books. i also believe there are/were limited signed books from uk retailers, i think those are/were signed books (not editions) where the isbn matches the normal first edition of the book. 

signed editions are a fairly new thing, and have made signed books so much more accessible which is awesome! signed editions have a different isbn then their normal edition and signed book counterparts. they are technically two different books and are listed as a separate book in stores. that is because signed editions have one (1) extra page. this allows the author to be sent boxes of pages, not books, to sign BEFORE the books are bound. the pages are then sent back to the publisher to be included in the final printed copy of the book.

signed editions help authors to sign even more copies which allows for things like signing hundreds of thousands of copies of a book in some cases. if you are familiar with john green’s books (and hank’s too), he is a large part of the reason signed editions increased in popularity. for example, his book turtles all the way down had a signed edition and a normal edition, they were the same price but the signed edition included the one more page that john had signed. this also allows authors to do fully signed first edition runs, such as john’s new book the anthropocene reviewed (which comes out the same day as dan’s book lol), where every single copy of the first edition is signed (so there is no such thing as an unsigned american first edition, this is becoming more popular for some authors to do especially if the first edition print is not very a large quantity).

if you saw dan’s ig story from today (which was almost definitely a delayed post lmao), he was signing the signed edition papers that will be bound in the signed edition copies of the book in the us. as far as i know, it is only the us publisher that has this option. as you can see on the us store books-a-million, there is a signed edition and a normal edition. they are listed seperately and there are different isbns. the signed edition will be bound with the one extra page that dan has signed. 

both types of signed books have been actually signed by dan and are so cool to have if that’s something you want and are able to get. if not, you’re not missing much.

3) book piracy and pricing

i’m not here to tell you what to do, so i won’t. i know being able to buy books is a privilege and dan is a millionaire. full stop. he doesn’t need the money and you probably do.

books are expensive. the difference between cost and price of a book can vary drastically. does your calc textbook actually cost the publisher $300? probably not, but it does cost more per copy to print less copies of something (like a textbook) then it does to print millions of copies of a nyt bestseller. does a $24 book cost that much to develop/print/distribute? maybe. 

but most of that money goes to the publisher. the fact of the matter is authors get very little from the actual sale of the book (usually only a couple dollars), which okay, not exactly convincing you against piracy but hear me out. the actual number of sales a book has lets a publisher know how successful a book is, which helps to decide how many more prints/editions are made and often dictates future opportunities for authors.

a series of books that i love is very popular on tumblr, but there was a serious problem a few years ago where copies of the book were being pirated so much, sales were down so drastically, that the publisher almost didn't continue to publish the series. in the case of smaller authors or your favourite ongoing series, buying your copy of the book could be the difference between the existence of the next book or not.  in dan’s case, i don’t know what his future plans are, idk if he plans to write more in the future, but i do know that publishers look at previous sales to decide if they are going to publish a book in the future.

ebooks are usually cheaper and more accessible if money is an issue. used books, while not helping with sales, are also a great option if you’re willing to wait and look around. you can often request your local library buy a book and read it that way, or they might even already have it. there probably even audiobooks and ebooks at your local library. stores like am*zon are usually cheaper as well. online stores of large chains like b&n and indigo will often have the books cheaper to match amazon. however if you can, support your local bookstore.

of course if the author is a horrible person do whatever tf you want. also fuck the textbook industry. 

tldr: dan worked really hard on his book with professionals to make it the best it could possibly be. i think it looks beautiful, and it will help a lot of people. the publishing industry is a mess but really cool. check the isbn of the copy you ordered if you want clarification or you can just wait for the surprise. 

[sour-n-salty-citrus]

Do you have any hopes for the season finale? I saw in another ask, you described the dynamic between rick and morty this season as "very weak, distant, and downright frankly boring" and I completely agree with you! I hope that, because this is most we'll see rick and morty interacting this season, it'll have at least a few moments of what makes their dynamic so interesting to watch.

(Ok i started airing my grievances with this season, which ended up being... long, so skip this paragraph (starting at / / /) to get to my thoughts on the finale)

Oh gosh I remember that ask (I think-). And yeah, maybe I'm being a bit overly critical. I'll probably look back on this season with retrospect, and a kinder, fonder view. Ik androgynousblackbox (think thats right) made a great point about it being the season FOR rickorty shippers. And sure, I agree on some bits, like Rick acting all pissy and partying the way you would if your ex got with someone new in the planetina ep. Overall though, i think my problem lies in that I was enjoying more individual moments than episodes themselves, especially the middle three. For example- Amortycan Grickfitti. Like, I really liked the idea of the Ship getting on a crazy adventure with Summer and Morty (and Chutback). I like the idea of a Beth-Jerry-Rick adventure. But put together, it's just kinda... meh? You know? I liked the first half of the Thanksgiving special... but it kinda dragged on after that. I get that they want to give other characters (particularly female ones) more attention, which is completely understandable and i encourage it(!) but I can't help but find it underwhelming. Like, Summer in the voltron ep was like- girl how are you STILL vying for Rick's attention! He's the worst! Haven't we done this already? (I will say though I ADORE how far Beth has come, props to her for continuing to seeing through her dad's BS. I was worried the character would relapse into a more typical s1/s2 Beth, and I'm glad she didn't). Some of these plots, funnily enough, seem more fitting of the comics (they actually had a voltron parody already). Fun and entertaining for two or three-something issues, not so much a 22 minute episode. i think most of my complaints come from the dynamic between our titular characters- ok, I know I'm very biased (I mean you can see it), but I came to the show primarily for their relationship. It doesn't even feel drama-fueled, just that they kinda... can't be arsed. I'm torn because on the one hand, they're unhealthily codependent and this separation is probably a good thing, but on the other... it doesn't feel natural? I'm not sure if that's the right word- it's like, season 4 had them practically joint at the hip, but all that's suddenly flung out the window. It just kinda feels like this "i got better things to do" vibe from both of them and its strange. The only time they both got a solo adventure (I'm classifying "solo" as an adventure where they spent a significantly large portion of time together, without the other family members) was in the sperm ep and Thanksgiving ep. And, well, in the Thanksgiving ep Morty felt like a side character in his own show, and the sperm ep... um. Yeah. I don't think it's AS bad as people were saying, but I was cringing the whole time (the second hand embarrassment for Morty was so strong I had to turn off the episode multiple times and return to it. It's just like- godammit MORTY). And I think there's good reason those two seemed to be the most disliked episodes overall. They're the ones RaM spend the most time together and it's... meh. Meh? Meh. I don't mean to say the season overall is bad (it has loads of good points, and its amazing for Smith family as a whole) just that if we're talking specifically about the dynamic between these two? Yeah, I wouldn't recommend a single episode from this season so far to use as an example of their relationship.

/ / /

There's one thing this season has been pretty good at, though. And it's showing us what happens when Rick is alone.

And that brings me to the finale.

"Who is Rick without Morty?"

Well... we already know the answer to that. Pathetic. Sad. Lonely.

This season has been phenomenal in humbling Rick. (And trust me I'm happy for it- every time someone beats the crap outta this shitty old man I'm like YES!!! IT'S WHAT HE DESERVES!). Ep 1 had his "nemesis" clearly besting him, ep 2 had Beth making constant digs (love her) and overall pointing out his extreme callousness and cruelty towards even himself(ves). Ep 3- when Morty shows interest in a girl and ditches him (like seriously it's not like he's moving out, chill) he immediately goes on a bender and develops a deep attachment to the first person he can (wearing yellow, funnily enough). Ep 4, he devotes himself to becoming an "honest man" for his new child, only for it to instantly be taken away from him. Ep 5 highlights how RICK is the asshole for making fun of and taking advantage of someone well-meaning and honest, if "simple", and how literally not cool that is. Ep 6 has his crazy rivalry with the president, and they both get smacked down a couple pegs for that. Ep 7 shows what happens when he allows himself to get carried away, and that he can end up driving everyone else away in the process (lucky they still wanted to save his ass when he needed them). And episode 8? Hooooo boy. Episode. 8. We see a direct parallel in Birdperson with Morty, and the whole "Rick and [insert] 100 years!" Rick has few people he cares about, arguably only one or two that he truly devotes himself to, but when he does, boy does he go HARD. We see younger Rick, optimistic, energetic, friendly and hopeful. And we see all of that crushed in minutes. Rick is desperate for a companion, someone to see the stars with. He needs someone there, someone he can trust and rely on to stay. Someone like Morty. So without Morty, who is Rick?

No one.

And the thing is, Morty doesn't need Rick anymore. Not like Rick needs him. In season 1, Morty was this bright-eyed kid who was new to the cosmos and the multiverse, who needed his grandpa there with him as they explored all these places together. But that's not him anymore. That's not them.

The promo has Morty using the portal gun to go somewhere w/o Rick's permission (i like to think it's boob world lol). It doesn't matter to me as much where he's going, as much as he's doing it alone. He doesn't just not need Rick there, he doesn't want him.

(Also correct me if im wrong but I've missed that sweet portal gun so much. I think the last ep was like- the first time this season we saw it).

Morty's response to Rick? "Replace me!". And wow. Wow. WOW. Morty doesn't give a FUCK! I think Rick thinks that because he's so smart, that he can offer so much, that Morty will come crawling back, and I don't think he will.

Hopes for the finale! Hmm. I mean, I definitely hope "evil" Morty makes a reappearance, haha. I think we all do tbh ;). I want to see some Morty development too, this season has been very Rick-centric (not that there's anything wrong with that!) so I wanna see what's in store for Our Boy. I really hope we get to see the Citadel again, and see the state it's in, but I doubt it. We know something super big is in store, it's just a question of what? Other hopes I have is some Summer + Beth action (please let them team up Im BEGGING) and Jerry too ahaha. I'd love if some other side characters made an appearance as well. Oh- I'm definitely expecting a dramatic cliffhanger at the end of the first half leading to the second half, with the kind of angsty music that leads into the credits (pls that shit is so good (OH WAIT imagine if it was like, for the damaged coda, but like- the chopin version or smth so it could be more subtle maybe bruhhhh)). Ok haha, maybe that's asking too much, the writers made it clear in the story train ep that they weren't gonna do that big dramatic showdown (... unless 👀). Oh, I'd also love some Premium Angst too, like someone getting kidnapped/nearly dying (like ACTUALLY nearly dying). These stakes better be so damn high I could spear a man on them! OH, also I remember androgynousblackbox (is that right? I hope it is) mentioned something along the lines that they could be driving Rick and Morty apart this season in order to have them come back together stronger than ever in an explosive finale, which, I'm strongly hoping for myself.

Thanks if you made it this far! If you have any thoughts on or hopes of your own for the finale please feel free to share! :D

[kendrixtermina]

If you're doing tritype comparisons, I'm not sure of my heart fix. I'm a 6w5 with a 1 fix and probably not a 2 fix.

im not sure i have acecss to any sources that you havent already seen but I'll just do my usual thing

General 3 vs. 4 fix

4 fix

more guarded compared to others of same core type (though other 4 fixers may read this as "lack of forced friendlyness")

stresses their tastes & preferences (ie, rant about music they really don’t like)

suspicious of hype & overly popular things - some tedecy to be the contrarian voice in a conversation

peoples characteristics, including one's own, are seen as more "fixed", so imitating a celebrity seems pointless because you are you, not them. You don't have their particular talents (-> "envy") & having a second copy of the celeb "adds" nothing to the world.

3 fix

especially if it’s the 2nd fix this can show as being more positive and/or better at self-motivating and a tendency to follow trends or fads

but it’s just as likely to show as just less obvious emotional coloration, or just adaptiveness/ social perceptiveness, or even ‘icyness’ - so you’ll often arrive at this by principle of exclusion.

An observation from reddit type me threads is that these will use the phrasing of wanting to be/ become certain things. - Sensors say they "copy cool traits from cool people " intuitives use more flowery terms like they "envision what is needed to accomplish ones goals & then become it." - reading life stories of enterpreneurs or celebrities & trying to work out "their secrets" etc.

wanting to live up to people's expectations, might repeat (or at least feel tempted to repeat) what got them praised in the past.

a 3 fixed artist, even if they have, say, a bigass double 4 wing, might be apologetic about no longer being "the old version" of themselves, like it's hard to not react to people's trope version of you even if you eventually move on/ disown it.

Whereas 4 fixed ones may make the second album completely different to the first - "can the posers who liked us only because of hype please go home now?" basically. you want ppl to see you but in the specific way that you want to be seen & if its not that then its existential crisis time. If the fans don't like the Insane Asylum Aesthetic then eff them we're gonna do Insane Asylum as long as the person feels like it because theyre primarily doing the art for themselves...

in 2 the performance is strictly for others and in 3 for both self & others and sometimes those needs conflict.

Each fix has its own separate version of the Mortifying Ordeal Of Being Known, basically.

613 vs 614

despite being 1 number off the alchemy of how it combines it somewhat different.

6+4 -> Lots of raw negativity & then the overlap with the 1 is Yet More Criticism. So 614 is really negative skewing.

Whereas 613 is a lot more neutral. It's still way more fiery/temperamental (& more "human"/"everymannish") than the triple competency trifix but still pretty  efficiency focussed.

Plus without a "bad" identifying component like the 4 the combined moralism of the 6 and 1 are going to be more apparent.

But the biggest overlap between 6,1 and 3 is work orientation. If you slap a 7 wing on the 6 and sprinkle on some sx you might still get a "work hard play hard" person with a bit of a fun capacity but generally these are very focussed on hard work & morals, & maintan a clean wholesome image. They'd want others to admire the goodness & sucess, though a core 6 would maintain claims of humility.

i know one specimen irl who hasnt got a single bad grade in his life, spends his vacations taking doctor courses to get yet more qualifications despite already having a ton, & really likes volunteering for humanitarian causes.

whereas 614 with the 6 and 4 put together there wouldnt be an aversion to the "controversial" esp. when morally justified. This trifix would punch a nazi basically. (So basically my guess would be that one.)

[tigerdrop]

hey i just wanna say the long posts genuinely make my day. also can you talk more about gordon freeman character because the way you write him makes me quake in my gay little boots

i would love to talk about gordon freeman. thank u for the opportunity

the first thing i need to communicate about gordon is that this dude sucks. and i say this in the fondest way possible. he is a bitch from the moment he drops into the world until the moment he goes out. if you dont believe me, give it another watch! gordons mouthy and rude for no real reason, at least so far as “being a regular dude on his way into work” goes, and this dude goes around calling his coworkers names with zero provocation. (of course, we all know that the reason is because its a funny guy improv stream that borrows a bit from freemans mind, but im talkin from a character sense.)

but my argument isnt just that gordon freeman sucks. its that he sucks in a very specific way that i find insanely endearing. i love this dude. i love to hate him. hes awful in a very mundane sense - weve all known a guy like this, at least if youve spent too much time online - and its cathartic to watch him suffer because of it.

gordons a smart guy. as written, hes gotta be - hes a recent MIT grad, on his way to work at a top-secret research facility to do weird shit with crystals and theoretical physics. but the thing about smart guys is that theyre often......selectively intelligent. we can see this in the way that he has a hard time navigating his surroundings, and needs the science crew to guide him through it and keep him alive.

this is one of those things that is a natural consequence of somebody going through the game for the first time, but that i am interpreting as “gordon is kind of stupid sometimes”. its uncharitable but its not like he doesnt deserve it. he likes to boss around the crew as if he knows what hes doing, when he often very much does not, and is fond of demeaning their intelligence. hes real bad about this with tommy in particular, treating him like hes a kid whos playing at being a scientist when tommy is actually a decade older than him. all i am saying is that gordon ought to stay humble. hes awful cocky when he perceives himself as better than others.

which, i think, tracks with how cocky he gets when he gives up on the whole “well-meaning citizen” thing and just unloads bullets into people. he puts up a front of being a Nice Guy, you know, just some dude caught in a bad situation who doesnt like seeing his companions obliterate every NPC they come across, but that doesnt stop him from cackling like a fucking madman and mowing down aliens (and soldiers) every once in awhile. when he stops seeing himself as helpless and starts seeing himself as the one in control, the gloves come off. he gets mean. and i think thats very sexy of him

this, among other things, is why i am insistent that gordon freeman is a control freak. he desperately wants to be in control of the situation at all times, shepherding around the science crew primarily by bitching at them, but its of limited success. its futile. sisyphean. tommy, coomer, bubby, and benrey exist almost to torment him with exactly the thing that would make him suffer the most: a gaggle of people running around causing problems for him, but he cant go anywhere without them b/c hes reliant on them to make it out alive.

its perpetual suffering, and its cathartic to watch. and funny, too. and if youre a little weirdo like me, its very, very enjoyable. how twisted up he gets when nobodys listening to him! how sweaty and frazzled he must look. its cute, and it also makes me want to reach through the screen and shake him and tell him to just be a little nicer. he wants control but he doesnt know how to attain it, he doesnt know how to play nice like a real leader. i think its a neat contrast to gordon freeman as we know him in HL2, where he literally is the leader of the resistance and has to live up to it. this is gordon freeman but if he was moe through helplessness.

“helpless” is, i think, a great way to describe him. a core bit of imagery in half life is this sense of railroadedness and helplessness, with gordon freeman being put into play like a chess piece and having no choice but to move forward. and this iteration of gordon leans into that by being totally dependent on the science crew in order to make progress and Not Die. and hes also subject to the whims of benrey, local eldritch weirdo who has basically made it his life mission to fuck with gordon.

gordons anxieties dont help with that. if he wasnt so fun to stress out and fuck with, the science crew probably wouldnt do it so much! too bad for him that they like fucking with him so much that he was driven into a panic attack (multiple times, even, depending on your interpretation). hes got that real neurotic mindset. always worrying about shit that could go wrong, and attempting to exert control over his surroundings in an effort to control the anxiety.

IMO the real way to nail the Neurotic Gordon Freeman Experience is to combine the ever-present anxiety with his pervasive sense of self-loathing. he openly states that he has no friends and nobody seems to like him, and to that, i really gotta say, i wonder why. he doesnt really seem to factor in that hes kind of a bitch, and has way too high an estimation of his own intelligence relative to everybody elses. its really one of the worst ways to be: aware that people dont like you, but unaware of exactly why. if he was like, 10% nicer, he probably wouldnt have had half as many issues getting through black mesa, but also, its funny to see him squawking his way through the game. so, you know.

its stuff like that that makes me headcanon him as a dude with low self-esteem in general. convinced that hes not likable, not attractive, out of his element......impostor syndrome, except that theres some truth to it. this is a guy who truly does not realize how good he has it: he really is just an average shitty dude, and yet, somehow, benrey took a shine to him. some poor motherfucker out there actually likes him and wants to suck his dick. thats dedication

also, i keep bringing up “repression” when i talk about gordon. and hopefully, what ive been talking about helps explain why. he has a strong desire to be a regular dude, not just murdering his way through black mesa, but if hes pushed hard enough he leans into it. gets bossy. picks up a cigar off a dead soldier and takes a long drag, before smacking forzen around with a pistol and ordering him around. gordon freeman is a regular, kind of anxious guy who likes competitive swimming and streaming on justin.tv and making anime references, and he is also a guy who takes a filthy pleasure in making a trained soldier his bitch. and i didnt make up any of this shit - this is purestrain canon, baby. this is a guy with problems

to me, this screams the kind of guy who represses a lot of shit b/c he doesnt feel like its morally decent. you run into this guy a lot online: the wokeboy, the online leftist, the guy who spends too much time on social media websites. (like reddit. i think he would actively use reddit and he would never get any appreciable amount of karma but he never stops posting. its sisyphean! cathartic.) from the way he talks about “bootboys”, i think it tracks. he knows about imperialism, he knows about feminism, but at the end of the day hes your average american white dude who struggles with internalizing it.

a lot of those dudes struggle with sex and gender issues. (dont we all.) when youre trying to be a Good Person(tm), you spend a lot of time thinking about your own relationship to sex and kink and all that shit. and i maintain that a too-online dude who buries a lot of his control freak tendencies would also try to bury a lot of weird sexual shit in an attempt to seem Normal and Well-Adjusted and not like a little freak. i justify this by the sheer number of times gordon blurts out weird sex shit as a joke. there are only two outcomes to making that many piss jokes: either youre secretly a piss guy, or you lathe-of-heaven yourself into becoming one. i will stand by this

ive talked a lot about why this dude sucks. now, let me talk to you about what makes gordon so much fun to write. first things first: hes funny! a subjective evaluation, yeah, but both in- and out-of-character, hes aiming to be funny. and being the straight man to everybody else plays into that whole “helplessness” thing.

secondly: underneath it all, there is a good dude under there. gordon worries when his companions get hurt, he tries to clean them off and patch them up, and hes got his lil leftist heart in the right place. you could even read a lot of his bossy, bitchy demeanor as him wanting to make sure everyone gets out okay and doesnt hurt themselves. when it comes to animals and anti-imperialist sentiment, gordons a pretty good guy.

hes the kind of guy who would probably see a dog on the street and get excited and play with it, but would get really prickly about the correct way to put dishes in the dishwasher. control freak tendencies.

finally, subjecting such a miserable, tormented guy to even more psychological anguish is really, really fun. you feel a little bad for him, but he kind of deserves it. so many problems he goes through are purely of his own making, and if gordon would just relax and quit trying to hard to maintain control - of himself, of the people around him - and own up to having Problems and Issues, he would be a happier guy. but thats why its fun to bend him until he breaks. being a little control freak myself, putting gordon freeman thru psychosexual torment is cathartic.

when it comes to writing his thought processes, the fact that he is canonically some kind of psychotic (yes, i am boldly claiming this. suck me) and i am also canonically some kind of psychotic makes it easier to write what i think his thought processes are. i just give him my brain issues of “getting lost in thought” and “overthinking fucking everything”. a touch of paranoia helps. even if i dont explicitly label him as schizophrenic please know that i am writing him as a paranoid little nutcase at all times because, uh, you write what you know.

paranoid. anxious. of the mindset that everyones out to get him (which isnt helpful when everyone is out to get him). repressed and deeply Not Normal but trying so very fucking hard to be normal and well-adjusted. a control freak with sadistic tendencies who also really, really likes getting bullied by his best frenemy. a hapless little nerd who sounds really cute when his voice starts to break from nerves. and, most importantly, a dumb jock. do not ever forget this.

thats gordon freeman, babey. hope that helps

[saberspirit]

jiang cheng character analysis essay under the cut! bc he means a Lot to me (its 5 pages im sorry)

tl;dr my thoughts on his relationship to his parents, his relationship with anger and feelings of inferiority, what zidian represents to him, his siblings (largely about what led to him and wwx falling out), and my thoughts on reconciliation between him and wei wuxian in the end.

tw!!! for child abuse and death, also warning for spoilers for the ending. 

alternatively can be read on google docs for accessibility

foreword: by writing this it is not my intention to imply this is the end all be all interpretation, or that i know more than fans of colour (especially chinese/chinese-american fans). i’m looking at his character as a white fan and through a western lens. i understand there are nuances i wont understand, but i have tried and continue to look at him w/ an educated view point and i’m always trying to continue my own self-driven education. i’m as always open to criticism and correction, although i understand it is no ones job to do so. it’s purely an interpretation from someone relating to his themes that i talk about here. thank you for reading! 

Jiang Cheng has a very complicated relationship with his parents (understatement), though different from Wei Wuxian’s complicated relationship w/ them (some overlaps being given).

It’s obvious to me that JC identifies more as his mother's son than his father's—feels he has to be because surely that’s why he feels neglected and like he’s constantly being found wanting by his father (even if Fengmian does Not mean to come across that way and isn’t a cruel man). He identifies with his mother’s anger and feeling of not being what his father truly wanted or loved and I don’t think he realized the effect she had on him with her constant comparison game—trying to measure him up because Madam Yu used him as a playing piece in her constant warring with Fengmian and instilled a sense of otherness in him and his deep-rooted feelings of inferiority and not being Good enough, not being enough in general. And yet he still deeply loves them even through all that he’s been through because of them both.

He never grew up learning how love should be in a relationship; should be from a parent to a child. The love he learned is a different type of conditional love from WWX's (WWX being that he doesn’t trust it in the first place, knowing it will leave). JC receives love and praise but knows it comes from a silent arrangement: it’s transactional. He upholds what his parents want and he gets…a form of it. Jiang Fengmian loved him in a way that you just kind of do love family, perhaps without a real reason otherwise—not pretty, but it is as it is. Madam Yu loved him in a way one loves a possession: she saw too much of Jiang Fengmian in him and JC was a reminder of how unhappy she was and how much her husband didn’t seem to care about her or what she gave him. (This isn’t to downplay Yanli's role in JC’s life: I think she was truly the only one to show him unconditional love in a way that he understood and recognized but it's unfortunately different from siblings and fell on half-deaf ears when all JC really wanted was his father’s approval).

Madam Yu was (afaik) stated to not be physically abusive (aside from the whipping when the Wens came from Wei Wuxian), but she was one-hundred percent verbally and emotionally abusive (for example, punishing WWX w/ isolation from the family w/ seclusion, or in general just how she talked to JC and WWX). She broke those two boys and it's something that can’t be undone…and Zidian represents that trauma, abuse, and expectation and JC’s anger and resentment that was the product of it. It’s literally lightning in a whip form; able to bind without harm, but it’s primarily used to hurt; it can reveal a true form; control over it is only relinquished to one’s family and loved ones.

JC doesn’t just lash out verbally at Wei Wuxian when they meet in his second life, he literally does. It’s his anger under his skin like static, driving him forward and being unable to rest because he’s constantly looking for closure he can’t have. He resents how his parents and Wei Wuxian made him feel but it’s also the only thing he has of them, and he clings to that (and therefore Zidian). It’s the last thing, bar Lotus Pier, that he has of his family anymore, and he wields it like a weapon…because ultimately it’s the only thing he's known for a very long time. Anger is an easy emotion. He wears it well. It was an emotion he learned from his mother, and he is his mother’s son.

As a side note for Zidian: Jin Ling refusing to take it from JC in the Burial Mounds to me was very much about not wanting a goodbye. He's a stubborn kid—JC mirrored what his mother did to him in handing off Zidian before certain death, and I think Jin Ling realized "take care of Zidian" meant "because I can’t anymore". JC wanted Jin Ling to stay safe and keep a hold on their family's legacy, but Jin Ling refused it and stepped forward to protect JC—JL is tired of goodbyes and afraid of losing more people, but also that stubborn streak to protect his family back. He went into the fray himself even if it’s not what JC was asking him to do (but then to JC’s chagrin the kid never really does do what he asks usually, Jin Ling has a good head on his shoulders and he’s as stubborn and quick to anger as his jiujiu but he’s also as incredibly loyal and caring). And I think it's a good vehicle to show that JL is breaking that cycle for them both.

Back to Jiang Cheng and anger and his siblings though. Yanli is all about showing affection in her words and actions (ie. meal sharing, peeling the lotus seeds, etc). WWX struggles to show it in forthright actions, let alone verbalize it (he’s truly bad at it) so while WWX does love his brother and shows it in actions like giving him his golden core…it’s not something JC picks up on well, or at all because he doesn’t even get told about the core until the Guanyin Temple. Jiang Cheng is someone who needs verbalized confirmation and very obvious action. But then to be fair, JC is also not good at verbalizing his love and care (he and Wei Wuxian are two peas in a pod w/ this one). It’s often behind barbed wire because 1) that’s how it was shown to him and 2) because it’s safer and easier to hide behind anger. He really does use it as a shield to protect his real feelings because he’s used to his feelings being trivial and being thrown in his face, and is used to loss. It’s a buffer.

This leads to a problem: Wei Wuxian does love him unconditionally, but I don’t think JC knows that. When he’s faced with the golden core surgery after everything, it’s definitely obvious, but it’s so twisted up in being hidden from him, in his own fears and feelings of failure and reliance that it’s soured. And he struggles to reach out and be frank with his own worries.

And this leads and lends to the severity of their falling out (not the only cause, but a big player in it).

He deeply loves his brother, but it's also entrenched in his bitterness and fears. If it was initially hard for him to verbalize because of those issues (on top of being a teenager/young adult and his feelings of inferiority irt WWX), he’s now in the current day steeped in sixteen years of loss/grief/trauma. Of unresolved tension between the two of them because WWX never told anyone anything—even if that’s just how he is, nothing personal towards JC except maybe that it’s his little brother, his shidi, and he doesn’t want to put a burden on those he loves—and JC tried time and time again to believe him and in him.

The problem was that his trust got thrown in his face time and time again. His older ‘peers’ (clan leaders) mocked and insulted him to his face for his naivety, pointed out that what WWX was doing was an insult to JC and their family, that WWX’s actions disrespected him and that he should do something about it. WWX’s actions themselves alongside him never letting JC in on anything further isolated them and put walls between them. This sewed the seed of the idea for JC that maybe he was naive. That WWX couldn’t uphold his duty and promises to JC and their family while also upkeeping his own personal code of ethics. (Not that it helped that Jiang Cheng also started lashing out at Wei Wuxian in minor ways for not having Suibian, but he didn’t exactly know why, to his credit).

His trust was him trying to care for WWX through all they’ve lost, but he’s also under the immense pressure of leading and rebuilding his home while also being looked down upon for his inexperience and ties to the man the cultivation world loathes.

Jiang Cheng believed WWX when he said he'd help him, wanted him to and expected him to. That’s his big brother and ultimately family comes first, so it was out of the question that WXX wouldn’t uphold that duty to him. Jiang Cheng is barely an adult as Sect Leader and was still a teen when they lost everything, so of course he wanted to rely on and believe Wei Wuxian when he said he'd help. JC doesn’t usually rely on others—I’d wager he hates relying on WWX especially as a callback to the inferiority complex—but he lets WWX in when they have the “Twin Prides” talk, lets him in when he promises JC to help him rebuild their home…and then WWX lets him down several times.

Post Burial Mounds there are signs that JC notices, if not consciously then subconsciously, that something is off with his brother (the demonic cultivation, the flute, the lack of Suibian, his weakness when pushed, etc), little things that he noted but didn’t have the time during a War to think too deeply on. He’s more relieved to just have him back where he can see him, happy that his brother can help them. Jiang Cheng gives him his vote of confidence in his abilities, in him, because he never thought of WWX or his methods badly (having been a fan until it became a symbol of losing Wei Wuxian to Something Else). Even if he had thought something of it, did have a concern, they don’t easily talk to each other now.

That much is obvious when after various meetings post the Sunshot Campaign as WWX is struggling with his temperament and resentful energy, after WWX saves the Wen remnants from the Jin Clan, and Jiang Cheng shows up at the Burial Mounds. He still believes in Wei Wuxian, still is bound to help him, and wants to help him. He’s willing to sacrifice the Wens for his brother. His actions and words are not pretty, but by god is he desperate. Jiang Cheng wants to save him and hides it with harsh words because once again he’s not good at being forthright with his feelings. He’s at his wits’ end, he’s barely 20, and suddenly he's losing Wei Wuxian too. It’s not about them being Wens because at this point he’s aware they’re helpless—it’s because it’s WWX and he’s supposed to make the right decision and be competent. It’s freshly post-war and he’s scared: his big brother is leaving and he feels powerless and he Hates that. Once again feels like he’s not good enough. Not good enough to save WWX, not good enough to lead, and he’s under intense scrutiny. He tells WWX as much that at this point he can’t help, and it hurts him to not be able to. Jiang Cheng wants Wei Wuxian to help him, help him. It’s an admittance wrapped in hurt and hurtful words, and WWX throws it in his face because he can’t let him in.

It’s not meant in any malicious way. Wei Wuxian is also traumatized, scared and hurting and dealing with the changes demonic cultivation is causing within him. But this is a key moment when JC for once verbalizes his fears and WWX tells him, ‘good, you don’t need to worry, I don’t have anything to do with you from now on’. (And of course, WWX is doing this to protect JC, but this response is what JC is afraid of).

So we have two times that JC has tried really hard in his own ways to let WWX in. To rely on him and be honest with him and WWX ends up…breaking his promises and leaving him and their family behind. And to me, that explains his actions when the last time they speak before he dies (that we’re shown anyways). WWX is sitting down with Jiang Cheng and Yanli. JC is the one that set up them being able to meet him, the one that reached out even after they fought to make his defecting from the Sect look convincing. He was the one that told Yanli that WWX should be the one to give a courtesy name to her child.

And then WWX brings Wen Ning. Yanli is open to Wen Ning sitting in and enjoying their family tradition, but JC can't understand why. Why WWX chose these people over his own family. He resents it. When he says "you might not be able to come back, to your family" I can imagine how much it destroys him to hear WWX say "but the people I’m returning to are also my family". Because what does that make them, WWX’s siblings; what does that make the promises and the years spent raised together, the duty he had to them first. Wei Wuxian might return to the Burial Mounds, but Jiang Cheng has to return to an empty Lotus Pier. The ghosts of his parents and ghosts of memories of his siblings he’s never getting back (because Yanli will be in Jinlin Tai after her upcoming wedding).

Repeatedly over and over Jiang Cheng reaches out, but time and time again it’s like WWX is telling him he’s not enough: not enough for WWX to rely on, not enough to protect him, not enough for him to want to return to, not enough to be family.

Then the cultivation world comes for WWX and his amulet. Yanli is killed, as far as JC can tell, because of the mess WWX made, and once again he’s in the dark about everything. Then WWX dies and rumours swirl that JC killed him, and maybe he did, maybe he is his brother’s killer even if Wei Wuxian would call it a misunderstanding. He’s left alone with an orphaned nephew in Lotus Pier with his entire family, bar an infant, dead.

So Jiang Cheng spends the next sixteen years without answers, with WWX having reinforced his insecurities and fears that stemmed from the abuse he'd suffered during childhood and then died. Yanli died when she never should’ve been in danger in the first place, seemingly because of Wei Wuxian. And he's so angry. He lashes out at memories and reminders, lashes out at anyone who chooses that same path that WWX chose over his family.

By the time Wei Wuxian’s come back from the dead and JC knows it’s him, WWX is still deflecting, still hiding still not telling him the truth. The fact that WWX comes back at all hurts purely as a fresh opening of the old wound, but the fact that he doesn’t come to find JC, that once again JC and his family isn’t a priority and once again is second best (this time to Lan Wangji)?

He doesn’t kill his brother. JC sits him down in a room and tries to talk but old hurts rile up and he reaches for anger again. WWX isn’t forthright and it makes it worse, neither of them are good at communicating: too many things unsaid, that can’t be said, too many misunderstandings and neither of them knowing how to talk about it. JC has Fairy there and it’s a minor act of revenge. JC uses what he knows is WWX’s weakness to intimidate and immobilize him, but it doesn’t help either of them actually talk.

Reconciliation is going to require WWX being able to talk to him without deflecting and JC getting angry so easily. But by this point, he’s given WWX a lot of chances and it’s why I think they could and would easily post-canon. Jiang Cheng's starting to come to an understanding that WWX did and still does care about him. He didn’t give him his golden core for no reason, and JC starts to understand why WWX did it for him and that he knew JC well enough to hide it in the first place.

He started to reach that conclusion shortly after Wen Ning told him—oh the pain of it having been WWX's chosen little brother figure—and Jiang Cheng had gone around asking people to unsheathe Suibian. It's why he brought Chenqing to the temple in the first place.

I think it speaks to his maturity that he decided at that moment he couldn’t say what he wanted to tell WWX in the end. I think he knew neither of them was ready, but I also think it speaks of how much he misses and trusts WWX to have let him go for now…I think he knows they will meet again as long as they both live, and that they'll be better for having waited. After some time to think, digest, they’ll be ready to be family again and all that entails.

[morphogenetic]

the requested, very long adaptation of a Twitter thread I made about flowcharts in media. contains multiple spoilers for several things but I will section off each part. Under a readmore because Fucking Long

(starts with 999/general ze spoilers but will also talk about ai, raging loop, and 13 sent.inels a bit)

1. The MAJOR 999 and Zero Escape spoilers part

while it is obviously super convenient for replays, the 999 port including a flowchart kind of defeats the point because zero WAS just blindly trying things. they'd always have to watch junpei fuck up from the beginning over and over because they DON'T have the ability to just jump back to certain points in the timeline!! at all!!

like yes obviously its a thing to start from the beginning over and over (and then speed through text youve already seen) bc its a DS limitation in some ways, but it is FULLY accurate to zero's own gameplay experience (and, hell, even junpei's) to NOT let them be able to just jump around wherever in the timeline

in contrast, letting the vlr/ztd protags jump in random places into the flowchart IS fully justified! it makes PERFECT sense that they can do that! in fact, if they COULDNT do that, it would be Bad, bc the plot relies so heavily on them Being Able To Do That that it wouldn't make sense otherwise. ztd in particular actually is brilliant with how it does things completely asynchronously to the point that piecing together the order of events is almost impossible. yes its confusing, but its SUPPOSED to be! it's not always good otherwise but the way it PURPOSEFULLY disorients the player like that is. So good.

2. The less-major-but-still-spoilers AI: The Somnium Files Part (and general-Uchikoshi-media part)

ai is kind of a weird case, because unlike A Lot Of Other Uchi Stuff, the existence of a multiverse is only implied, rather than canon. the branching system is so drastic that i don't think it WOULD work nearly as well if it didn't have an in-game flowchart. on the other hand, its not super well built into the actual narrative structure of the game, which feels INCREDIBLY unlike uchi.

its probably just something he brought over bc he was so used to it from his previous games and it DOES have a narrative purpose in ai, its just less of a storytelling choice from his usual time bullshit way of doing things lol. i do like it but it's probably part of the reason that ai isn't quite as high up for me as 999 and even punchline in some ways. its still GOOD but it doesn't take full advantage of being a game (or a show) in the same way that a lot of his other stuff does

3. The Raging Loop flowchart part (minor spoilers, primarily for the early routes, and implied 999 spoilers)

raging loop is a really interesting blend of flowchart and looping to me, because, just like 999, every time you die you are actually starting at the beginning. however, because of the way the game sets up haruaki (the protagonist), and because of the way the actual looping mechanic works, letting you skip forward past sections you've already seen makes PERFECT sense. there are cases where haruaki just straight up goes "yeah I did the same shit here a few times to get this to work" and it makes PERFECT sense bc hes not even like "WOAH a time loop," he just immediately accepts the mechanics of his situation and spares recounting it over and over.

this works even better when you throw revelation mode into the mix, for a ton of huge spoiler reasons that i won't actually talk about here, but rloop really is the perfect blend of 999 vs vlr style time bullshit, and it works PERFECTLY for the type of story its trying to tell. it takes into account that the type of person playing this game probably already HAS played a ton of vns with a time loop mechanic, and so it gave itself a flowchart and a protag that is set up fantastically for this kind of setup.

4. The 13 Sentinels part which you REALLY SHOULD NOT READ IF YOU HAVENT PLAYED IT

this is a spoiler buffer this is a spoiler buffer lalalalallalalalaala

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okay if youre reading this I sure hope you have played 13 sentinels because otherwise im going to spoil you. please play it or watch an LP if you dont have a ps4, if you need content warnings I can give them to you, I'm begging you for the love of god play this game if you like vns at all

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comparing 13s to any of these other things feels weird, because it uses its flowchart system in a completely different way. unlike the others w the looping mechanics, a ton of the branches on each character ARE different days entirely. not always, of course, but its more used as a way to help the player keep track of information they've already learned, rather than as a way to introduce a sense of non-continuity into things. this works perfectly fine for 13s because Flashbacks Real And Happen Often

this probably comes from the fact that 13s was at one point going to have a FUCKTON of endings, like 12 for each character, so it did originally use the flowchart for a branching-narrative purpose, but then had to repurpose it entirely. it did actually arrive from the usual idea of a choice system that is typical for many visual novels/adventure games, but it ends up using it in an entirely different way for budgetary limitations

(this next part is in rot13, because while those were fairly minor things, this stuff is MAJOR major. just. please I must reiterate PLAY THIS GAAAAAME. if you have plug this next part into a rot13 translator and you'll be good)

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gur erny sybjpuneg bs guvf tnzr vf whfg gur tenqhny puebabybtvpny cvrpvat gbtrgure bs rirelguvat, ohg vg VF hygvzngryl n yvarne fgbel rira vs rkcrevrapvat vg va n yvarne jnl jbhyq pbzcyrgryl ehva vg. fb, va gur raq, vgf sybjpuneg orvat onfvpnyyl puebabybtvpny sbe rirel punenpgre, rkprcgvat synfuonpxf, NYFB cresrpgyl freirf vgf fgbel. gur cynlre whfg unf ab jnl bs xabjvat gung hagvy arneyl gur raq.