#im the talking to the clients people guy

[perigelion]

i am a legal/comms person, why are you messaging me about tech/banking stuff, i Do Not Know which banks you need to connect to the cashier on this domain, i can give you like... all the documents for the company holding the domain. Do you need that??? I have their license i can sure show you that

[apocalypticdemon]

I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.

[getoutofmytardis]

ed and stede staying with izzy and buttons coming to visit 😭

[normansnt]

Shitty day

(Hazbin Vox x Fashionista!Male reader)

No warnings maybe some foul language.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To say Vox was annoyed was an understatement. Val was bitching about something again and Velvette was on phone calls the whole day yelling in every. single. one of them. And when the clients she was yelling too still didn't budge she went to whine to Vox.

All in all Vox had a headache the whole fucking day that even a reboot couldn't fix. He knew what he needed. He needed you.

You were one of the most valuable people at Velvette's fashion boutique second in command after her. And since you made a shit ton of money for the whole company Vox noticed you. Oh, he noticed you every time he visited Velvette he saw you delicately dancing in between shelves of fabric needles is your mouth needle pillow on your wrist and a thimble on your finger.

You moved so magnificently among the many unfinished pieces you started, he couldn't help but watch. It was like water flowing between rocks but you sometimes stopped here and there to make an adjustment on a dress or suit.

Velvette of course noticed this, she notices everything.

"Jesus fuck, just go talk to 'im he is gay if thats what you're wondering of course he is he works in fashion. Or what do I care just move your ogling elsewhere."

And that he did.

He flirted with you, and to his surprise you flirted back. Not because he didn't think he had a chance he knew he was a handsome fellow but most people seeing him cower in fear. You didn't.

He liked you. He liked you a lot.

This was about 4 months ago.

Now its a habit that he visits you almost every day after work. Since then, you have gotten your private office so you guys had privacy.

You're usually still working on a piece or two when he walks in back hunched smile gone and he falls face first into your couch.

Today was the same he was even massaging his temples.

You noticed that today was a particularly hard day for him so you left to get some coffee.

When you returned he was still in the same position. You chuckled to yourself quietly. You loved the relationship you two had. Now, you weren't exactly a couple (yet) but you were the one he trusted with opening up. You were his safe place, and even if his day was good you were the first one he would tell the good news, or if his day was not good nor bad just an average day he still came to you to calmly watch you work while you guys talked.

You lifted his screen up sat down on the couch and put it on your thighs. You two were very comfortable with each other this was nothing. He turned around so he could look up at you.

"I made you coffee" you lifted the mug while smiling at him. He smiled slightly. Fuck, he loved you so much.

"Please be my boyfriend."

Vox blurted out without sitting up. He was just laying in your lap looking up at you hopefully.

You chuckled quietly and instead of answering him just bent down to kiss him. Vox eagerly returned the favor.

"I'd love to be your boyfriend" you answered after you two parted. Vox sighed with contempt as you intervened your fingers with his. Even though it was a shitty day, and there will come shitty days, you'll be here with him. Those days don't even seem so shitty anymore.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I know its short but its sweet so I kinda love it.

I need to write much more for Vox cuz honestly I fucking love him but for some reason ideas usually hit me for Alastor😭

Also I'm a true believer that under that big-shot TV persona he is a broken little boy and actually really sweet so😎

ANYWAYS

I hope you enjoyed your reading, ladies gentleman and others, good afternoon good evening and good night🧡🦖

[eee-lordy]

Hiiii! Can you write about jacob elordi x fem reader who is in charge of the makeup and outfits on saltburn or elvis?

Maybe there is a video going viral where he is looking at her (WITH THOSE PUPPY DOG EYES HAHSHAJDVDSJ IM GONNA EAT HIM) while she is doing his make up and she is clueless, yk those videos where the music is lana del rey and the caption is like "me when im literaly obsessed with her" or "when hes completely in love with u>>>>>"

And when that goes viral, the cast teases him and they go on a date?

Idk i think its cute :3

───※ ·❆· ※───

You were never one to get star struck. In the year and a half you'd been professionally applying makeup to the mugs of many stars, you'd been unfazed by celebrities captivating auras. You hardly blushed when Chris Pine tried asking you out as he sat in your makeup chair. You'd laughed in understandable assurance as Billie Eilish apologized for almost knocking your powder kit from your grasp; when her brother burst in the room to surprise her. You saw your clients as just that, people who trusted you to properly apply blush and fake scars.

But all the composure you'd been proud to claim went out the window when you'd been assigned to work with the cast of Sofia Coppola new film. You hadn't expected to lose your cool. In fact, you'd been rolling your eyes as the hair stylist that shared your caravan had droned on and on about this new Elordi fellow and how dreamy he was. Some of the other workers in the hair and makeup department parroted her yearning for the guy. But you were certain you'd remain calm and cool in this supposed deities presence.

And then he sat down in your chair. And he looked up to you with an intriguing set of droopy dark eyes. And you knew Jacob Elordi was about to be a real problem for you.

It wasn't his fame. You weren't swept up by his essence because of the collective crowd on the internet drooling over the guy. It wasn't even his magnetism. Because he did have a lot of that, you wavered it was necessary to survive fame. But it was more the way he would look up at you from that make up chair. With those dumb stupid big beautiful eyes.  And his smile that followed. And then the infuriating way he'd start conversations with you, those first few days on set.

"What'd you have for breakfast this morning?" Jacob would wonder, watching as you readied a sponge. You would answer and ask for his in return. He would mention stopping by a cafe earlier and go on to ask you where you grew up and if you liked it there and what the best book you've ever read was called. 

"You've got to stop chatting away, makes it hard to do your touch up's." You'd smile, reaching out to adjust Jacobs perfect fucking face so you could work on his brows. 

"Sorry." He breathed out, seemingly genuinely guilty. He went on explaining himself still, slowly as you continued to do your job. "Don't like awkward silence. Or bullshit small talk. Getting to know you seemed like the safest route. Since you'll be covering the dark circles under my eye's this whole shoot."

You laughed in understanding before announcing that you got it, and waved over the hairdresser on site today. 

"Wait, before you go, that book you mentioned..." Jacob pointed your way as you turned for closing up your kit of brushes. Then you watched as the guy wrestled his cellphone from his jacket pocket. "Here," Jacob said, extending the device your way. "Write the title in my notes app. I will forget, but I don't want too. It sounded properly readable."

"Oh." You turned your lips down in a twisted grin of surprise. As you took the device from Jacob's grasp, you felt a surge of gratification that the guy trusted you enough with his phone let alone wanted to read a book you mention not having read since uni. 

Not missing the way the hairdresser rolled her eyes, you grinned and found Jacobs notes app with ease, straining not to glance beyond your means. With the press of a few buttons you wrote down the title, and fought off the impulsive urge to include your very own phone number as well. That would be embarrassing, knowing full well this man would never call or text or probably even dare to glance your way beyond the makeup chair. 

///

The next few weeks went by the same. Jacob would yammer away until you almost had to hold his mouth shut to finish his makeup. And you would fill the silence by telling stories of your own, because he'd mentioned he wasn't fond of silence and you knew your job went beyond applying lip liner, it was also to keep celebrities happy as royalty.

And all the while you blinked away thoughts of how funny he was. How beautiful Jacob was. You wouldn't let yourself realize he was exactly your type. You wouldn't let yourself dream that you might be his. You simply relished the times you made him laugh. Once you made him laugh so hard he cried, tear tracks ruining the powder you'd only just applied. 

The hairdresser who was the leader of fawning over Jacob as soon as he left the room had taken to frowning in your direction most days. You reckoned it was because she'd never been able to make him laugh that hard, or at all, ever. And the stories she told him when he asked her to seemed to lose his interest halfway through every time. Try as Jacob might, you saw his eyes glaze over as the hairstylist droned on about her retirement plan or the grocery list she'd put together that day.

After acknowledging her sorry excuse for conversation Jacob would stop you from packing up and heading to lunch so he could ask you for more books to read, more films to watch, more stories from you. Then his assistant would interrupt, or he'd be called to set and you'd be left to head to the craft table with dangerous feelings of lust and intrigue to push away. You would not let this boy break you of your career long streak of professionalism, damn it.

///

One night, in the middle of a week break from set, you spent an evening scrolling mindlessly. When a tiktok with Jacob's name in the tags popped up, you scrolled away at the speed of light. You didn't let yourself linger too long on posts with him there, not wanting to know anything good bad or otherwise so long as you were assigned to work with him on this project. But it wasn't long before another tiktok popped up featuring the guy in a very familiar setting. He was too famous at this point. You watched as you saw leaked footage from behind the scenes of Priscilla, but weren't too shocked. The stars of the film were occasionally being interviewed by publicists between takes to document their experience, beginning to promote the film.

And maybe you let yourself keep watching out of a sense of entitlement, you'd been working on this set. You could watch a video of Jacob from work, right? You couldn't tear your eyes from him no matter how hard you tried now anyway. You watched as the person holding the camera zoomed in on the guy while he adjusted his suit jacket. You watched as he seemed to talk to the costars at his side. You watched as he looked up and smiled. And you couldn't help but melt a little at the sight, he seemed so happy, so at ease. And then you watched as Jacob's grin widened as he waved someone closer. And much to your horror, you saw yourself step into frame. 

You remembered that day, where you waited on the side lines to fix Cailee's eyeliner. While the director was storming up a new camera angle, Jacob waved you over to mention the last chapter of your favorite book he'd almost finished reading. He was laughing over a bit that you'd warned him about the week before. And you were laughing over how excited he was about it, finally having someone to gush over your favorite plot with.

Now, huddled beneath the blankets of your bed, you slammed your phone down at your side, bewildered to know someone had caught your interaction on camera. Raddled to have just seen Jacob lighting up at the sight of you. Angry at yourself for hopping you'd read his body language in a way that suggested he really liked you that much.

When you picked your phone back up, you watched the candid moment over and over, trying to debunk Jacob's smile. Trying to convince yourself he was only being friendly, only cared because he had to find someone to mingle with during down beats. 

And then you read the comments. 

"If Jacob smiled at me like that, I would die."

"Imagine making him laugh like that she's so lucky."

"Who is she??" One comment read. "Her last name will be Elordi if he hasn't married her already, calling it." Someone replied.

You shouldn't have read the comments.

///

When you were due back on set you swallowed away the excitement bubbling up in you at the prospect of seeing Jacob again. This was so unlike you, to be awaiting the arrival of your client with an embarrassing giddiness. As you reminded yourself that this was your job and Jacob was simply a guest in your makeup chair- the man himself eased into the caravan, ready to get ready for the day.

"Hey, you! I had a bunch of points earned up to get two free coffees so I brought you one. I remember you said you like almond milk so I asked for that." Jacob was all smiles as he extended a latte to you. Awe fuck. 

"Thank you, Jacob." You struggled not to sigh with angst as you accepted his very generous surprise. Luckily, he seemed none the wiser that you'd answered through gritted teeth. He just kept smiling as he headed to your chair.

"Oh, me first today lovie. Need to start your dye straight off, you're little makeup girlfriend will have to wait." The hairdresser announced, daring to grab Jacob by his sleeve, yanking him toward her end of the trailer. The other workers around rolled their eyes, sick of her endless commentary. You bit your tongue as you leaned against the counter, shaking your head when a coworker scoffed in the hairdresser's direction. Luckily, Cailee waltz in, ready for you before anyone else. You thanked God for the distraction, readying your brow pencil and chatted to the girl about her break from set. 

All the while, your least favorite coworkers voice demanded to be the loudest in the room. She made everyone listen to some boring ass story and practically whinnied when Jacob got up to trade Cailee places. 

"No offence, you're fine and all, just don't have hair as silky smooth as Jacob's." The hairdresser told Cailee but made sure her comment was loud enough for everyone to hear. "Oh wait, silly me," 

As Jacob settled in the makeup chair and began to ask if the drink he'd brought you was good, the hairdresser of your nightmares shoved her way between you and the person you were meant to be working on. 

"I left of a bobby pin, how'd I forget," She droned in an annoying pitch, nearly shoving you over in her attempt to get closer to Jacob. 

"Can you please get out of my space?" You called, annoyed that she was pushing you away from your station without a single polite excuse.

"Can you please stop being such a jealous bitch?" The hairdresser whipped to face you with a manic smile.

"Oh my God?" You almost laughed in shock at her comment when another coworker dared to reach out and pulled her away, and out of the trailer. Another hairdresser apologized to the room for the previous girl's behavior and stepped up to lead charge of Cailee's wig.

With no time to shake the rage that had been born in you, you pushed it down, biting your lip hard as you went about finding the right sponge for Jacob's foundation. 

"Are you okay?" He asked, seemingly worried. And that pissed you off too. Why'd he have to act like he cared so much? Why'd he have to be so damn wonderful?

"I'm fine. Thank you again for the coffee, it...is kind of bitter but it was a really sweet gesture, I swear. Close your eye's please." You responded as calm and cool as possible.

"Bitter... sweet..." Jacob winked, just for you to see. It was the best thing you'd ever witness. And the worst all the same. You were sure you blushed. You tilted his chin and struggling to suppress how much you'd miss when you didn't get to be this close to him. He stayed quiet as you finished his face, and so did you. When his makeup was done, almost everyone else had left the trailer. The last remaining beautician was walking out as you'd closed the case to your kit. 

"I thought you didn't like awkward silence." You dared to mention, as Jacob stood to leave. It wasn't like you'd thought to ask. It was just a thought that ended up blurted out. And then you were bold enough still to look up and right at the guy with those perfectly shaped eyes to find he'd already been staring right at you. 

"S'not so awkward with you."

You really wish he hadn't said that. You really wished you'd never prompted him too. You really wished he wasn't still standing there looking across the features of your face like he was waiting on you to respond. There was a knock on the door just in time, and a voice calling for Jacob to hurry to set. 

"I'll see you after lunch, right?" Jacob wondered as he moved toward the door. You muttered something like "Yeah sure," as you turned to start collecting your things. As far as Jacob knew you were headed to the craft table. But as your feet started marching out of the trailer, you found yourself headed toward the manager of the crew you'd been hired in with. You explained to her that you really thought it was best you turned in your resignation. 

You'd never dared yourself to tread the line during work. Never been so enamored with someone you were meant to be professional with. It wasn't in your best interest to see how far this went. And it wasn't in Jacobs best interest that you kept lingering around distracting him with stories and novel suggestions.

So, on a decided whim, you packed your things, swallowed frustrated tears, and headed home for good.

///

You let yourself be mad once your front door was shut and locked. You threw away the stupid coffee Jacob bought you. You turned the telly off and tossed the remote toward the hardwood when Euphoria came on. You muttered and cursed and slammed cabinets as you made a carb heavy comfort meal and called your best friend. 

The day went on and turned to night as you tried to stop feeling sorry for yourself. You began getting ready for bed, talking yourself into sleeping off all the weird feelings and events that had transpired today. Tomorrow, you'd find a new job and make sure to decline any with that one awful hairdressers name on the list of beauticians. 

As you sat on the edge of your bed and set a reminder for yourself to job hunt tomorrow afternoon, a notification interrupted your typing. 

Instagram was alerting you that one certain Jacob Elordi was sending you a fucking message. He'd followed you a couple weeks ago, when you handed him your phone to show him a picture of your beloved childhood pet. He scrolled away from it and found your handle to promptly pull up on his very own Instagram, following you with a smile.

Your eyes widened and your thumb worked faster than your brain, clicking the popup before you could talk yourself out of it. Oh, shit now he was going to know you opened his fucking stupid ass message. You really wished you hadn't met this boy. He wasn't even here and he was torturing your every thought. 

"You were NOT there after lunch as promised. Call me? xx"

Before your eyes displayed a row of numbers that if pressed would call Jacob Elordi's cell phone. You tried really hard to talk yourself out of it. But being away from him for the last ten hours had really done a number on your heart. It missed him more than your brain was afraid to admit. Your thumb clicked the numbers. Your phone started to ring. 

After one buzz he answered. 

"I got off set to hear you'd quit and left me to bear that horrid hairdresser without you? Was the coffee really that bad?" Jacob's voice crackled through the line, soft and saccharine. You chuckled morosely at his coffee joke before responding.

"No pleasant greeting. What if it wasn't me calling? What if it was some crazy fan girl?" You dared to venture. 

"Are you saying you're not a fan of mine?"

You wanted to assure him that you were probably his biggest, but sighed in place of a response, struggling to choose your words. 

"What happened? That hairdresser should be fired. You shouldn't've left." Jacob spoke, as you watched the traffic out your window and relished the sound of his voice in your ear. 

"It..." You couldn't help it. You couldn't hide it any longer. "It wasn't really her. I quit because of you, Jacob."

"Me? I- I'm sorry I thought we-" He sounded too worried, and you realized you'd spoken a little too cryptically.

"Not because you did anything wrong." You hurried to explain, interrupting his unnecessary apology. "It's me, not you." 

"Is this a break up? I never even got to ask you on a proper date." He laughed a humorless laugh.

"That's the thing." You said. "I like you way more than I should've ever let myself. It's too unprofessional for me to work with you and have these feelings. I'm sorry, I shouldn't even be telling you this. Everyone treats you like a piece of meat, I hate that I-"

"So... what I'm hearing..." Jacob's voice rose a bit as he interrupted you, catching your attention off guard. "Is that I can actually ask you on a proper date? And this doesn't have to be a break up at all."

"Oh! I- wait are you joking?" You blurted, shocked by the tone of his voice and the fact that it seemed like Jacob Elordi was asking you out. 

"I like you too, dummy. I've been doing my damnedest to make that clear. You know I don't just follow every wardrobe artist on Instagram and bring camera men cafe treats. I used my free coffee on you! I'm so sorry it was no good though." 

"It wasn't the worst coffee ever." You smiled, feeling a calm and hopeful buzz wash over you. 

"Well, let me take you on a proper date, for a proper cup of coffee, and talk you back on set." 

"I can date you, or be your makeup artist, but I will not allow myself to do both. I have a very strict moral compass as a working lady." 

"I'll choose the first option then by a long shot." You could hear Jacob's smile in the tone of his voice. You let him ramble a little longer about the day he'd had and how bad he felt that you'd been moved to quit. He asked you to meet him at the cafe across from the set during lunch tomorrow, and you promised you would in fact show up without a doubt this time. 

Fuck finding a new job tomorrow. You were going on an absolute dream date with Jacob. But you were most definitely ordering your own coffee.

[behidethetrees]

THE RIGHT SIDE OF MY NECK, STILL SMELLS LIKE YOU.

IN WHICH… having a job while dating a clingy rafe doesn’t exactly go hand in hand.

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Fem! Pogue!Reader

Contents: NON-CANON!Rafe, Reader fixes cars, clingy and possessive! Rafe, brief Pope mention, Your friends are the pogues, This is set in the 2000s!!

THIS IS A REUPLOAD!!! my old blog was deleted so i have to reupload all my fics :( Anways enjoy!

Prequel Part 1

Rafe hates that you work. 

You weren't meant to clean cars, You were meant to stay inside your Tannyhill house with Rafe, Always next to him, never out of his sight. 

He hated the assholes you complained about for being rude to you. Rafe always argued or sometimes fought people who even looked at you wrong. Once he heard some old dude yell at you to hurry up, Later that night Rafe smashed his car with his golf club. He was big on respect especially when it came to you. 

But there was nothing more that Rafe hated than the fact you worked with Guys alongside two other girls. It's not that he didn't trust you or thought you might cheat on him with them, He didn't trust them. You were beautiful, heaven sent in Rafe's eyes. Your guy friends were lucky to even be in your presence, Or they were even luckier Rafe didn't bash their heads open for being around you. 

Sometimes Rafe would show up to your job for a bit when he wasn't playing golf or he missed you extra. You knew Rafe was very, very clingy, always touching you in some way, But today was extreme. 

JULY, 2008. 

“Rafe I'm gonna be late!” You tried to get Rafe off your back but he kept hugging you tighter. 

“Do you have to have to go, why can't I come, why can't you just quit already?” Rafe whines. He'd never admit it out loud but he dreaded the times you went to work.

You start to waddle towards the front door. “If I let you come with me will you get off of me?” You question him.

Almost instantly Rafe steps away, looking at you surprised as you already walk outside, opening your car door. “Really? I can go?” He asks shocked.

“If you dont get in the car in 10 seconds I'm leaving you.” You stated, Not that you were going to leave him but you wanted him to hurry up. Rafe almost trips because of how fast he darted to your car. Rafe insisted he’d drive you, that wasnt up for discussion.

Rafe opens the car door for you when you two arrive at the Pogue bodyshop. He slips his arms around your waist as you walk, keeping you close to him, This was going to be a long day. 

When you popped open the hood of your client's car, Rafe hugged you from behind, Kissing your neck gently as you worked. At first you didn't mind but it started becoming a lot. Anywhere you walked, Rafe followed. When you went to talk to anybody Rafe slung his arm around your neck while giving whoever the death stare, making sure they know you're his. 

When you went on lunch break Rafe sat you in his lap, keeping you away from your friends. As you eat your sandwich, Occasionally letting Rafe have a bite, Your friend Pope comes up to you.

“Hey Y/N do you want my chips?” Pope offered, He always gave you his chips because he felt too guilty to tell his mom she wasnt getting the right kind. 

“Yeah sure thanks Pope” You smiled at him, as you extended your arm to grab them, You felt Rafe's strong arm pull yours back down. 

“Fuck off.” Rafe grits through his teeth, Staring at him tensely. Pope's expression fell and he quickly turned around to start speed walking to the other pogues.

“What the hell was that?” You flicked Rafe on the forehead. 

“I dont like him, He's no good like the rest of those pogues.” Rafe states as he rubs the part of his forehead you flicked him on. Rafe didn't like your friends for many reasons, stupid reasons. Mostly because they're pogues, like you, which confused you. 

“Im a pogue too Rafe.” You remind him as you cross your arms, You didn't understand the whole ‘Kooks vs. Pogues’ rivalry. You recall the first time you met JJ he went on a rant on how you should stay away from kooks and how they're the real trash. 

“Not like them, you're different baby.” Rafe tried to clarify but he had already messed up. You stood up in front of him, still crossing your arms. 

“Apologize to him or leave.” You tell him. “ You can't come to my work just to be mean to my friends and clients, And I can't work with you all up on me Rafe!” Rafe quickly stood up, He heard your tone and your voice slightly getting louder indicating you were getting annoyed with him. But luckily for Rafe, he knew how to get you to calm down. 

“Hey, hey I'm sorry okay? Really I am, dont make me leave.” Rafe grabbed your hands to take them into his own. All it took was Rafe's sweet words and his dazzling eyes for you to give in to him. Your face softens as you look at him. 

You sigh. “Please stop clinging to me when I'm working okay? I promise we can cuddle when we get home but I need to get this car done.” You tell him, He quickly nods. 

“And I'm serious Rafe, apologize to Pope!” You playfully push his shoulder.

“Whatever you want baby.” 

A/N: someone on my old blog wanted a prequel of how they met so i will do that soon <3.

Requests

Taglist: @nowitsmissing

[dhrubajjj]

octaninelle pirate au/seven seas au!

so the idea for these guys is that their ship is one of those on water restaurants, like the baratie from one piece if u know what im talking about. Also the lil shell bit in the ship that i sketched up is where azul's office, i might tweak the ship design but it works for now.

azul - he was the easiest to design since it was heavily based off of his masquerade outfit and i gave him ursula's earrings. in his merform he's probably something like the kraken and he talks about the ship like how people talk about their cars, the ones that like talk about it like it's their child.

also i haven't been able to get that drabble abt idia and azul meeting in a pub and playing cards together. they probably meet in the mostro lounge instead of a random pub and play some magical card fusion of hearthstone + that tcg game from genshin.

jade - he's got a lil mushroom pin and also he's wearing pants that look like a skirt. i gave him a jellyfish haircut and pulled it into the ponytail because a lil voice whispered in my ear and it only felt right. every couple of weeks jade will grow mushrooms in some part of the boat and then azul or floyd will find it and get rid of them, then there's mushroom dishes on the menu for like months.

floyd - personally to me he looks a lil outta place since he's dressed less formally than jade or azul but that's fine. he does have a suit like how jade and azul has one but it's a battle to get him to actually wear it (+ when he does wear it, tends to put him in a nasty mood for a bit). i kept his clothes loose cuz of that and gave him a bunch of shiny jewelry also he has those fidget rings that have the spinny middle part.

i can see him working in the bar rather than taking orders or serving food and floyd probably brags about all his scars to his clients whenever he gets the chance (the scar on his face was from riddle, they had a lovers spat </3)

[alexa-fika]

Revenge and Teasings ( Asl x sister!reader)

A/N: Yall, I COOKED; we got some of that ASL action up in here 🫦. Will this make you guys forgive me for leaving you unfed for two days? We got those polled jobs; I think we all agreed on these guys’ jobs. I didn’t ask about Luffy cause he has a canonically modern au job given by Oda 👀 . Guys, I researched Law and firefighting for a few hours for this. Im a teacher, so thankfully, I didn't have to research that one. Also, beware, this does address abusive relationships, but dw, I also included a lot of wholesomeness at the end cause; hello?

Taglist at the bottom < 3

Dividers by @/saradika

The three Brothers find themselves in the living room, Ace and Luffy roughhousing while Sabo sighs, trying to separate them.

Their usual antics were halted as the door to the house slammed open and closed, their little sister standing at the door, tears going down her face.

“O-Oh hey, you guys are all here earlier!” She exclaims hastily, wiping her face

The fighting paused as all three paused and stared, Sabo nodding.

"Yeah… I only had a short meeting with a client today; Ace just had a PD day, and Luffy didn’t have a shift today… are you okay, Reader?”

He asked her, glancing at her; her eyes were puffed up, her hair was everywhere, and her clothes were covered with dirt

“Yeah! Yeah! Just had a little stumble outside; it was so embarrassing since everyone saw it and got overwhelmed,” she replies quickly, trying to fix the mess in her hair

The brothers all glanced at each other and then back to Reader, who clearly was lying.

Ace narrowed his eyes at her.

"You’re lying."

Luffy nodded also.

“Yeah, you’re really bad at lying when you’re upset. What’s wrong?”

“You caught me.”

She laughs

“The administration called me out today; one of my co-workers complained about how I ran the classroom; I was so upset I lost balance on my bike and fell,” she winced, rubbing her nose.

“To make matters worse, now I have a bunch of paperwork to do, thanks to her, so I have to get started on that,” she groans, walking up the stairs

“I’ll be downstairs for dinner!” she calls as she enters her room, closing the door behind her

“….”

“Since when does she call the other teachers ‘co-workers’? She always calls them by name when telling us about them, doesn’t she?” Sabo questions

“It’s absolute bullshit that anyone would complain about her classroom, I’ve seen her lesson plans, and they are one of a kind; there's no way anyone could complain about them,” Ace adds

“And why was she so worked up over paperwork…? She always loves doing it; she was one of those weirdos who loved having something to do…., especially for her kids.”

“She definitely lying again….” Sabo concludes, getting up.

“Let me talk to her!” Luffy exclaims, shooting up

“I think it’s best we all go together; if we go alone, she will easily be able to brush us off or lie again; it’s harder to do that with three people onto you.”

“Okay then, let’s go,” Ace said, getting up as well and climbing up the stairs

“Reader? Can you open up for a minute?”

“Y-Yeah! Just give me a minute!” She screamed, sounds of her scrambling being heard

“Hey, I thought I told you guys I had paperwork to do?” she nervously smiled as she opened the door

“ We know you are l-“ Luffy starts but is cut off as Ace quickly wraps his arms around him, covering his mouth

“We know you’re having a crappy day, but we thought that since we were all here, we would spend some time together,” Sabo cuts in with a gentle smile on his face

“O-oh, well…yeah, come in then!” She said, opening the door wider with a smile

After some whispering between Ace and Luffy, the brothers pile in; Ace sits in her desk chair while Luffy throws himself on her bed next to her, and Sabo takes a seat on the bed, glancing at her

"Hey, what’s this reader?” Luffy said, raising his sister’s sleeve to reveal a dark bruise on her wrist.

“Oh, that! Well, like I said, I had a pretty bad tumble on the bike.”

“You have another one forming on your face. Luffy points out.”

“Yeah… I must have been really unlucky; I fell on my face when I fell.”

Sabo narrowed his eyes at her; after so many cases and long days at the court, he had grown excellent at deciphering body language; it became second nature for him to spot mannerisms that hinted towards the person’s insincerity or anxiousness.

Mannerism, such as constantly shifting their eyes between different people in the room, the way they begin to scratch at their nose more often than usual, playing with their hair to try to ease the anxiety or the slight tilt they did towards the door, an escape route if they were discovered; all of these he could easily spot in his sister.

Luffy glanced at the bruises, experience of running in and out of burning buildings, and helping people in hazardous and unfortunate situations; he had seen all types of injuries and had become used to them, become used to identifying their origin

Scrapes and open skin from high-speed accidents, abrasions on the skin from hazardous materials being misused or leaked, and even bruises and injuries from civil unrest situations. He had enough experience to be able to tell injuries from a bike stumble to man-made injuries.

Ace glanced at her sister; because of his job, he was obligated to be certified in specific areas, mandatory reporting being one of them.

Because he spent all day with the children, he had to be able to spot any abusive indicators, inconsistencies in their stories, malnutrition, the children’s reaction to their parents, and weird marks on their bodies. Although he had been trained on how to apply this with his first-grade students, the same principle could be applied to any person of any age that presented these indicators, indicators that he could clear as day see on his sister

The brothers glance at each other, and ever the one to take the lead, Luffy is the first one to speak up

“Shishi, really? Do you need any help bandaging the scrapes?” he offers

“Scrapes? I don’t have any scrapes, Luffy”

“Hah? That’s weird; when people fall off their bikes they usually have lots of scapes; you don’t have any, just some pretty bad bruises,” he points out

“W-Well I-

“People who have been in biking accidents, or just falling in general, usually have lots of injuries in their hands, seeing as it is our instinct to protect our face and to slow our fall., you however, have none of those weird..” Continued Sabo

"W-Well, I have no self-preser-

“It’s weird despite having so much paperwork to do and being outed by one of your co-workers, these lesson plans are all completed, and there are footnotes all around from your co-workers seems they really liked your ideas and need you to help them implement them on their own classroom, wonder what kind of person would ask advice from someone they think is doing their job wrong” Ace comments picking up the various papers littered on her desk

“H-Hey don’t tou-

“You aren’t going to lie again, right?” Ace cuts in

“Because I mean, you really suck at it,” Luffy adds

“Do we wanna try another round of you telling a convincing story?” Ace adds, glancing at her

“I -I…” she tries to find the right words but hangs her head after failing to do so

“That’s unfair; you guys are teaming up and using your jobs against me.”

“It’s not fair? Not fair for who?” Sabo raises a brow.

“We are just calling you out on your bullshit, which is pretty nice of us,” Ace comments in a deadpan voice

“Usually, with everyone in the law, we would tear you to shreds until you said the truth. You should be thankful for being so lucky that we’re your brothers,” Sabo adds

“Can I do anything to make you guys drop this?”

“Nope,” Luffy said without hesitation

She groans, throwing herself in her pillow head-first

Ace sighed, joining his siblings on the bed and easily picking his sister up, sitting in her place, placing her on his lap, and hugging her

“Please let us help you; we promise we will deal with anything you may be going through.”

“Nothing wrong,” she says quietly

“N-nothing’s wrong,” she repeats, a slight crack in her voice as tears start pooling in her eyes

“Nothing…Nothing is wrong,” she says as she begins sobbing, gripping his brother's clothes tightly as she cried into him, the same way she did when they were children

The brothers all stayed still; Ace stroked her hair comfortingly and patted her back as she broke down in tears. Despite them all being grown up and having seen their share of violence and trauma, this still made the brothers' hearts bleed, seeing their youngest sibling hurt.

Luffy pulled her into a hug, his rubber arms embracing her tightly, letting her sob into his arms while Sabo patted her back in support.

"Hey now, it's okay; you can tell us the truth now; we aren't gonna be mad."

“I can’t; I can’t. “

"You can, we promise, we are all adults; we aren’t gonna lash out at you for telling us the truth," Sabo said firmly

"No matter what you say, or what has happened, we will always be here for you" Ace reassures her

“No, He said he would hurt you,” she cries

The brothers all freeze at her words; their smiles falter, and their faces all drop, their hearts all break.

Luffy pushes out slightly from their embrace, grabbing her hands and looking her in the eyes

“Reader. Tell us who did this, no matter who it is, we’ll kick his ass! We won’t be done in by some idiot; you’re always there for us, so let us carry your burden this time!” Luffy exclaims

“I don’t want you guys to get hurt; I couldn’t live with myself if my brothers got hurt because of me,”

“Don’t be an idiot!” luffy screams at her, shaking her, ignoring his brothers' protests

“We’re already hurt from seeing you get hurt and not being able to do anything! It hurts more seeing you get hurt!”

Her eyes widen at his words as her sobs become more frantic

Ace quickly pulls his little sister from Luffy before pulling her into a big bear hug and kissing her forehead affectionately

“We’ll be fine, just please tell us who it was; we promise we’ll handle this; as your big brothers, it’s our responsibility to protect you, and to do that, we have to know who did this to you,” his voice was tender and kind. All the fire that was in him earlier has dimmed and was taken over by nothing but brotherly concern.

“E-E-Enel,” she sobs out

Ace is the first to react, turning his sister toward him

“Enel? The asshole who kept harassing you back at the host club? I thought we left him behind when we left that job?”

“After we got our jobs in Newgate School, he managed to find my contact,” she cries

“He said if I stopped seeing him, he would go after you guys. He said he would destroy your careers and your lives, and then he would go after my kids.”

Ace sighs, flickering her forehead

“You’re an idiot.”

She squeaks, holding her forehead in pain

“W-What?”

Ace chuckles softly

“I’m calling you an idiot, did you forget? Sabo is the best attorney in GrandLine, Luffy is a firefighter with friends in all the offices, including the police, and you know our principal, Edward, is a family man, but he is powerful; he would not stand still if he heard this, especially not to one of his employees being under threat and definitely not when the kids are under threat.”

Luffy nods in agreement.

“We are pretty much the worst people a guy could try to mess with; you do realize that, right?”

“I know that, I know the chances were slim, but I wasn’t going to take any chances, not with you guys on the line.”

“So, instead, you decided to put yourself on the line?” Luffy asks

“Is your health not worth even a chance to protect us? Was that your reasoning sister? I thought you’d trust us more,” Ace adds

“You are aware of how idiotic that is, right?” Sabo chimes in

“We have dealt with worse; you weren’t just playing with our lives, but with your own as well; you really think letting some dickwad play you with would be better than taking a chance of us handling him??” The freckled man exclaims

“Also, did you think for a second we wouldn’t find out? And that we wouldn’t get worried?” Ace adds

“I was hoping I would be good at hiding it…

“You know damn well you have always been lousy at hiding stuff,” Sabo comments sharply, but then his tone softens a bit

“But you should have just told us the truth, no matter how dangerous you thought it would be.”

Luffy nods.

“You didn’t need to carry this burden alone; we could have helped you.”

“I’m sorry “

“Just don’t do it again, okay?” Sabo replies as he pulls her into a big hug; Ace and Luffy join him in the hug, the three brothers letting their sister hug them for long, not letting go of their sister, Ace kissing her forehead

“We’re just worried about you; we don’t care if it’s dangerous; we love you,” Ace reassures her

“Now let me see it,” he said, gesturing for her hand

She hesitates for a moment, not wanting to give her hand to Ace; she turns towards the other brothers with pleading eyes, but they all nod for her to show the bruise, so she finally does, holding her sleeve back, and puts her hand over Ace’s, the bruise covered a large part of her arm up to just below the elbow with some bruises and marks on various parts of her arm, some older, others fresh

Ace glances up

“Sabo, how good of an attorney are you?” he says, a dangerous undertone in his words

“Ace! You are not killing him!” Reader hisses

Ace doesn’t react to her words; instead he speaks calmly and cooly

“No one said anything about killing; I was thinking more of a severe beating” he chuckles before grinning wickedly

“Let’s kick his ass” agrees Luffy

“Sabo, you’re an attorney; please talk some sense into them before they get into trouble with the law.”

Sabo looks from his brothers to her; he doesn’t seem particularly against the idea of hurting Enel; in fact, his eyes are glinting with delight at the idea

“We’re not breaking any laws; after all, it was self-defense. We saw him attacking you, and we stepped in using reasonable force to protect you and ourselves.”

“Isn’t that right, guys? we only had to use force after he came at us.”

“Sabo! You are not lying in court!” She pleads

“Who said anything about lying? All three of us are witnesses; it’s not lying if it’s the truth!” Ace says not breaking eye contact with his sister

“It’s not lying; we all reported the same story and told nothing but the truth.” Sabo nods excitedly

“Yeah!!” Luffy agrees with a nod; they all seemed to be one and the same when it came to taking care of someone who hurts someone as important as their sister

“Guys, please, think about this,” she says, turning to look at all of them

“Sabo, come on, there’s no way a judge would buy three brothers having to all launch at a guy just for self-defense!”

“Oh, but there was even an officer at the scene who witnessed it; he had to help us get the guy off you; the guy was just ruthless; we had no option but to all step in,” Sabo exclaimed, continuing his made-up scenario

“Zoro would be more than happy to join if he hears what the guy did” Luffy grins

She sighs, looking at her brothers, tears welling in her eyes

“You guys are unbelievable,” a teary laugh leaving her

“No one is getting away with hurting our family; come here!” Ace says, grinning and pulling her in for a noogie, his smile widening at her small shriek,

“You ass! What happened to protecting your little sister? That hurts!”

"You use that language in your classroom?! It's just a noogie!" he said with a grin, glad that even for just a few minutes, she could just relax with them, forgetting about Enel and the damage he had caused.

"it does not hurt!"

"Besides, you deserved it for not being honest with us; you're not getting away with keeping things from us," Sabo laughs

“You treat your kids this way?!” She retaliates

“No, I treat my students with kindness and patience, but you’re my lil sis, so I have to mess with you a little,” he teases

“And you totally deserve what you’re getting.”

She scoffs

“Patience and kindness”

“You heard me, only kindness and patience, but you’re not a first grader like they are, so you get a little extra care since you’re older and know more than they do,” he said, his movement getting faster

“Not to mention, we can’t put little Tama in a headlock as a form of discipline,” he adds

“I’m telling Tama his beloved teacher will give her a noogie!

“You wouldn’t!” Ace laughs

“Tama would never believe it! She loves me!”

“Im also telling your squad you let innocent civilians be tormented, Luffy!” She said escaping from the headlock and running out of her room

“Oh, don’t even think about it, Shishishi!” Luffy grabs her hand, stopping her on her tracks

“You guys keep using your jobs against me! Unreasonable force, I say!”

Luffy simply laughs

“You should have joined me when I called you to train with my squad!”

“You wanna talk about unreasonable force? Well, you would know all about that, wouldn’t you, sis?” Ace replies, grabbing her as Luffy tosses her back in the bed and wraps her in another headlock

Sabo shrugs as he watches, not even going to attempt to break this particular situation up

“Not my fault! I need to use more force; otherwise, it won't get through your numbskulls!” She screams, laughing joyously, the pain and suffering from her situation forgotten momentarily

“And Sabo! How could you! A man on law watching these two brutes commit battery!”

“Hey, a little headlock is hardly anything; we’ve done far worse.” Sabo chuckles

“A man of the law would know all the technicalities of self-defense,” he points out,

“And you’d be surprised by how much I can witness without being called to court; a few weeks ago, I was watching a student in a bar brawl, and he didn’t even get arrested, just a fine, so don’t be too worried about me, I won’t tell.”

She gasps mockingly

Luffy and Ace both chuckle

“We should have expected you’d put up the least fight, Shishi” Luffy chuckles

“You’ve always been the least physical of the three; you are so easy to tease,” Ace adds

Sabo chuckles, though he didn’t join their ganging up on their little sister



After finally being free from their teasing, she smiled at them

“Thank you”

The brothers all smile back at her

Ace squeezes her hand

“We’re just relieved that you’ll let us help you now.”

Luffy nods

“Don’t worry, we will kick Enel’s ass!”

“You didn't think I would let it slide, did you, little sister? The way I see it is that Enel picked a fight with you, which in turn means he picked a fight with all of us; I won’t let someone threaten my family without paying the consequences.”

I was honestly worried that this would just keep a grim tone all throughout it, but I managed to clutch at the end because the brothers wouldn’t just let her sister stay upset before they dealt with this asshole, and honestly, neither would I. I really struggle with Luffy being OC here, but I look back at all his speeches and serious moments and I think this is pretty spot on, if anything mellowed out

Taglist:

@Imaginarydreams

@amethystviolin

[bueckerrss]

dangerous women

matt x fem! latina! reader

warnings: drug deals, guns, car races mentions of injuries.

1

————————————————————————

matt’s pov:

it’s been a few weeks since i started working for y/n it’s nothing like i imagined i usually would get my orders from marcos her assistant it was rare getting orders from her, you’d be considered lucky if you got orders from her personally.

working for her was not like i’d imagined and i didn’t have a specific schedule of when to clock in or out it was basically getting a call to go to a certain location to pick up or drop things off.

but today was not like any other day, today i was requested to drive y/n to a hotel for an event, it was a fancy event meaning i had to wear a white button up shirt and black pants.

looking at the time i noticed i should start heading out to go pick her up. walking down i grabbed my keys next to the door.

“where are you going?” asked nick as he came out of the kitchen with a sandwich “work.” i replied not wanting to get questioned by my older brother “dressed like that? i don’t think so” exclaimed chris coming up the stairs “look im late i have to go” i scoffed heading out to the car.

-

“okay, before we go in i’m telling you now don’t speak unless you’re asked, don’t make eye contact with anyone, if i tell you to leave me alone with anyone do it.” she spoke as we were walking towards the entrance of the hotel “what? why do i have to leave you alone can’t i just stay there with you?” i questioned “oh matthew don’t ever question my ways of running these deals” she said as she kissed my cheek and walked inside.

god, she going to kill me one of these days. following after her around the venue i would keep my distance until she would call me over, that was until she looked extremely uncomfortable with one of the guys she was doing deals with i looked at her more frequently to make sure if i should stay here or go towards them until i saw her dress slightly move up to reveal a dagger hiding behind the fabric, that’s when i knew she had everything under control.

or so i thought he would look at her like she was just an object and i did not like that at all, i just stayed slightly away from them waiting for a glance of help, that’s when i saw it she was giving me signals with her hand. as i walked towards them the guy in front of her looked at me making her look at me.

“hey babe where were you?” she asked looking up at me with pleading eyes to help her out “i was talking to one of your clients honey, who’s this?” i asked facing the man who was giving me a dirty look “this is william, hopefully an upcoming client for my company” she said as she motioned to the man in front of us.

“that’s good, so william do you think you’d be a good fit for my fiancés company? i mean she takes her job very seriously and i want nothing but the best for her” she looked at me in shock but waited for his response “i certainly do think i’d be a good client for her company” he said confidently “well that’s what you think but at the end of the day it’s what i decide” she exclaimed

-

as the night went on she kept talking with people getting to know them or whatever dealers do at these events. like last time i kept my distance letting her do her job, at the other side of the venue gun shots were heard followed by panic screaming.

“where the hell is y/n blanco!” a man in all black shouted looking around i was pulled out of my thoughts by y/n grabbing my arm and running to the door “you have the car keys right?” she asked as we kept running bumping to others trying to escape as well “yea?” i replied slightly out of breath as we approached our car.

once we got into the car gunshots were being fired at it without a second thought i started speeding off towards the gates of the hotel.

“who the fuck is that!?” i asked while looking at the rearview mirror at the black SUV following us “if i’m not mistaken it’s this guy i sorta had a contract with but i broke it since the things in that stupid contract didn’t make sense making his company go bankrupt” she mumbled out of breath.

“so now he’s trying to kill us?!” i exclaimed looking at her then back to the road “not if i kill them first” she said unbuckling her seatbelt and grabbing a gun from underneath her dress, where the fuck was she hiding that gun? “now matt do you trust me?” she asked slightly facing me with a straight face gun in hand i looked at her with a panicked expression my eyes switching between her face and the road, “WHAT?” i slightly raised my voice in panic “what do you mean if i trust you?” “matt. do. you. trust. me?” she repeated her words now more stern than last time “yes i trust you but what the fuck are you planning!?”

my question was answered by her rolling down the window half of her body was out while shooting at one of the cars behind us, gunshots now being fired from both cars, she got the tires of one car making them swerve off the road, another car taking their place and shooting at us again.

“FUCK!” i hear her exclaimed from next to me “what? are you okay?” i asked her switching my view from the road to her getting back into the car “yea, just a bullet scraped my arm, but there two more cars i need to get rid of!” she replied opening the sun roof of the vehicle and getting into position to shoot at the vehicle chasing us.

“y/n what the fuck are you doing get down here!” “matt chill this isn’t the first time i’ve done this i got it” she sighed as she kept shooting at the car, shortly after she came back down with a smile on her face “got the driver!” she laughed making me look at the rearview mirror to see the driver swerving to the side making the car flip over. “shit there’s still one more!” i exclaimed as i swerved into another route.

“matt this isn’t the way back to warehouse!” she muttered “yea i know we’re being followed remember? i’d be stupid to lead them back there” i laughed.

“okay this car is slightly leaning more on your side so i’d have to do something..” she says softly “what?” i asked not looking at her “ill have to slightly get on top of you it’s okay if not ill find another way!” she rambled “do whatever you have to do to get these last guys off our backs” as soon as i finished my sentence i felt her move towards me slightly straddling my lap to start shooting at the last guys.

in three minutes the car behind us was flipping over and she was going back to her seat “done! now let’s get back to the warehouse” she exclaimed out of breath.

once at the warehouse she got out of the car walking inside, once i got out i looked at the car “what the fuck?” i mumbled seeing there wasn’t a single scratch on it “they’re bulletproof” explained y/n from the door of the warehouse. “wow” i silently laughed making my way to her “how’s your arm?” i asked slowly grabbing it to get a better look at it “it’s better it hurts tho” “where is the first aid kit?” i asked taking her back inside “it’s in the bathroom under the sink” she replied taking a seat on the couch.

grabbing the first aid kit i made my way towards her and kneeling down “this is going to hurt” i looked at her while dabbling some rubbing alcohol on a cotton pad then cleaning her wound.

she winced once the pad made contact with her arm “sorry” i mumbled focusing on cleaning her wound up then wrapping it up with bandages “and done!” i said getting up from my kneeling position and examining her arm then her face, she was already looking up at me, we made eye contact for a brief moment before i saw her eyes flick down to my lips.

shit.

————————————————————————

chapter two done this one took a while but i finished it its slightly edited so i’ll go into more depth later hopefully yall enjoyed this one 😍

byeee

[qwuilty]

Hiii ive been playing roblox games recently and ive seen some very nice unpleasant from regretevator designs & there's a more specific idea i had in mind for them so fuck it im throwing my hat in the ring, random headcanons below

I imagine Unpleasant as like not really actively malicious however she has a remarkable talent for pissing everyone off and due to the elevator's infinitely repeating nature everyone has eventually gotten sick of him. Rolls nat 1s on every single social interaction ever. Guy who is like not really completely awful but deeply uncomfortable to be around for reasons you can't quite explain besides just being kind of rude.

Mostly non-verbal and mute like in canon, in context of the gradient form i imagine it can speak through some way of projection but in human form it's mostly sign language unless they really feel comfortable talking. Stares a lot though.

Thinks Infected is her friend and messes with him 'as a joke' because he thinks he's in on it. Infected is not and hates it immensely.

Absorbs information about modern things from the elevator because Infected's apartment is permanently stuck in the past, mostly from people in it or things from other floors. Xer sense of humor is always just a bit dated and behind what's currently funny, though to Infected it's utter nonsense as it's a bunch of garbage memes that haven't really been invented yet.

Not a fan of like owning cats but does find them fairly cute enough and unfortunately is one of those people who tries to chase them down to hold them. Tried to play with Poptart and ended up absorbing them and was like

Has not and refuses to tell Infected what happened. Also refuses to admit he broke her skateboard because Unpleasant tried to use it and ate massive dirt and broke it clean in half. Master of the "if i just say nothing maybe he'll forget".

All pronouns like in canon and genderfluid, doesn't really change much presentation wise though. I do think it would be funny if the gradient shifted a little though and that was it.

Can and would cheat at games, maybe not through actual hacking (except some garbage cheat clients xe put on Infected's computer) but through absolute unsportsmanlike behavior.

Loves technology and can be mostly distracted by stuff like phones, tablets, or computers. Unfortunately does not use headphones and instead will listen to it on speaker if you don't tell him off about it.

Can kind of just appear in places people would least want to see them. Mostly uncontrolled but always returns back to Infected's apartment.

That's all i have thank you for reading

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my hairdresser the truth?

So I've (25f) been going to the same Hairdresser (27F) for over 7 years. Shes amazing and I love her. I have a guy friend D (31M) who used to go to the same salon i did, but ended up leaving and going where his mom did. About 5 years ago I encouraged him to try her service and he did and has been loyal since

I had a falling out with him over a few issues, mostly personal (such as him calling me names as "jokes", him getting drunk and telling our friends we were celebrating his birthday with that I was a whore, etc). He claims he was drunk the one time and everything else was him joking and I needed to lighten up. I almost agreed, he is very good at talking, and then he came out that he was dating a girl. Who was still in high school.

I dont typically have an issue with age gaps when someone is of a certain maturity, but I knew the girl and she was very immature (never having had a relationship, didn't know what career she wanted, etc). He has everything figured out for himself and has bought a house and lived in it, he just wants a wife.

Well they surprised everyone and got married prior to the original date they had set. Which brings up the Hairdresser because he went to her the day before to get his hair done and mentioned he was getting married the next day.

She was shocked. She asked me my honest opinion and I told her it. I said we don't talk much anymore, I wasnt invited (they had about 15 people invited) even though the rest of my siblings were (one was working and couldn't go the other went as D was best man in his wedding). I also told her I am concerned that they have only been together less then a year and she's just now 18 (which I didnt know prior). I felt concerned because he is encouraging her to quit her job and stay home to cook and clean. I had previously expressed my concerns to the girl which D obviously didn't like and he called me drunk yelling at me one night.

The hairdresser was shocked again and didn't realize how young the girl was. She said she felt uncomfortable with a few things he had said and done during the last session but she wanted to make sure she wasn't overreacting (j dont know exactly what was said and done). She mentioned she probably won't have him back as a client.

I told my siblings at our monthly dinner, and the one who had him as best man actually was the one who didn't care and said it was my opinion. My sister told me I shouldn't have said anything and was smearing his reputation and pointed out that one of the reasons I was mad at D was because he had been going around to our mutual friends (including some mutual friends' parents) and had talked bad about me (alluding to me having a drinking problem and sleeping around, when I hadn't drank for over 6 months at the time he did this and im a virgin lmao- not like im going to correct his thinking on if I am a virgin, because it isnt any of his business, but I have no clue why he thinks I'm not).

So AITA for telling my hairdresser the truth and potentially getting her to remove him as a client?

What are these acronyms?

[bubuslutty]

IM DYING SCREAMING AND ROLLING ON THE FLOOR OF MY ZOO ENFLOSURE

NERD KÖNIG IS SO XJKAIFBL huge muscle man working in comic book store?!! Give me doubles I SWEAR

hehehe im so happy I got ppl who know that nerdy König working In a comic store would be so fucking hot. Like just imagining it makes me want to do stupid stuff like walking in there dressed like sin and watch him sweat himself half to death while I ask him if they have batman comics <3

He works at a comic store because he likes comics and more often than not, he doesn't have to talk to anyone, just rearrange the shelves and order new runs of comics and manga.

But he's also huge, built like a fridge on steroids. When he's not working, he goes to the gym to sweat out all the excess energy. He does it too when he's too horny and frustrated and his hands don't help much, so he goes to lift weights and sweat buckets like a fucking animal <3

He likes the store he works at, some of the guys he works with are okay, some are not, and he even managed to make friends at work. Horangi is one of the guys that König likes to hang out with during his breaks, the man doesn't speak a lot, but when he does, König always snorts behind his mask at his stupid jokes.

Horangi is the guy that looks after the manga section most of the time, he's even responsible for kicking out weird guys who 'come' by to visit their anime waifus. It barely happens, but when it does, Horangi is there to kick a mf out and curse him out.

The shop next to theirs is a shop that sells video games, consoles, merch and such. And König has made a friend out of the workers there; Gaz. Gaz's a cool guy and knows a lot about games, especially RPG. But he also loves playing Animal Crossing: New Horizon, which he does when he's on a break and König doesn't feel like talking much, so he just watches the man chop trees and harass his villagers.

Gaz is kind, charming and funny. Everyone likes him and he manages to calm down clients that get too heated about certain games in their shop, claiming their opinions are the truth. He's also had his fair share of unpleasant clients and has never shied away from putting people in their place. König has watched the man lift weights, run hours and hours without stopping at the gym, and knows for a fact that whoever has the displeasure of pissing Gaz off, will regret it immensely with a broken nose.

now enough abt my babygirl Gaz, let's go back to our boy König.

at work, he's always the one who gets sent to carry heavy boxes and parcels in the storage room, he's the guy that sets up heavy decorations when needed. And he does it without breaking a sweat either. On more than one occasion, he has caught some people trying to steal comics, and he only needed to stick his hand forward, wait until the people placed the stolen comics in his palm like a scolded child, and moved aside so they can run away from the shop.

He does have to say shit or do anything and everyone would need to think 35 times before even thinking stealing something.

[glass--beach]

Hey I just want to offer some support, plurality is not easy to accept in yourself and more common than people think. Whether that matches you or not, that remains to be seen, but there is zero harm in reconceptualizing yourself whichever way helps you in the moment.

You can be plural and not tell anyone.

You can be plural and identify as just one person.

You can be plural and tell some people but not others.

You can be plural in a way that Tumblr really doesn't like.

I'm a diagnosed DID system. My therapist told me something interesting;

Everyone has parts of themselves. My therapist for example, has a part of her that wants to be a good therapist and pay attention to her client and do a good job. And she has another part of herself which wants to be in PJs eating ice cream and playing games. That in itself is what plurality is, as a concept. Everyone has parts. Everyone is plural in some way.

Whether or not you have parts/alters/headmates (whatever your preferred term) isn't the question. Everyone has those, kinda. But for most people, the line between them is very blurred. Most people can choose which one they want to be, or listen to, at any given time.

A dissociated system is someone who can't choose that as easily. Whose parts don't flow into each other and merge and blur like most people's do. The gaps between them are oceans not rivers.

I'm not going to diagnose you with anything or tell you how to identify and god forbid anyone mentions syscourse I swear I will kill them with an axe. (Joking for legal reasons).

My point is that I understand the embarrassment and shame and pressure associated with figuring out "whether or not you are plural" and I want to help you speedrun to the part where you accept yourself however you are. If you recognize that there are different parts of you, or other people in there with you, then that's how it is. That's your brain's way of doing self and identity. Don't agonize about being correct. Just do what feels healthy. What helps you heal and function and feel good about yourself.

I know that I felt a hell of a lot better after I accepted that I do have multiple parts and just let those parts indulge in their own interests and hobbies and personalities. We went from constant self loathing to actually loving ourselves as individuals and having fun and making our own friends. The amnesia sucks, the disorientation sucks, don't get me wrong, sometimes life SUCKS. But you really dont need to make it harder for yourself by worrying if you're faking or wharever. Humans are complicated and your brain cells aren't arranging themselves so that they apply perfectly to the rulebook of how the mind is expected to function. You are unique and if you discover that plurality is a more accurate way of thinking about yourself then good on you for working it out.

Sorry if this was unwelcome advice. Im just some guy who likes your music and follows your tumblr and I'm hoping I can save you from at least some of the pains I went through when I started wondering if I were plural. The golden rule is do what's useful for you, not what's in the "rules."

yeah totally, i think feeling that your self is divided and the idea of experience fitting into one “self” is a social construct that is not going to fit everyone’s experience. it’s easy for anyone to talk in terms of having multiple parts in what is mostly a metaphorical sense. for me i have no control over which side is going to take over and they pull me in radically different directions and some of them hate each other lol. like i deal with self hate a lot but it’s occurred to me that that necessarily requires a separate subject and object and there are two completely different patterns of behavior and personalities attached to said subject and object. i feel if what i had seen before as maladaptive habits operate as a fully formed autonomous consciousness with its own wants and needs and even its own positives it makes sense to see it as a different person. ive also started to experience this self as often outside my body, only coming in sometimes. it’s very very weird.

if this is the way i’m gonna look at it then i for sure have at least around four different selves that come in at random, usually for at least a week but sometimes for months and they each contradict the others in a way that has made me very frustrating to deal with for others and made it very difficult to complete projects. it’s like, fundamentally contradictory beliefs, but with consistent enough modes that drawing boundaries around them might help me make sense of my own experience and not get too bogged down with one way of thinking.

[an-au-blog]

Kissing booth but its zosan

I'll just assume you're not talking about the movie, (if I'm wrong, correct me, I can work with that too... i think) to which I will say: yes. I agree.

I mean listen -

Vivi started a fundraiser for charity and she decided that it'd be fun if they made it in a more festive manner. To which Sanji is happy to help because, how could he say no to a beautiful lady in need? Zoro on the other hand did not want to go but Nami blackmailed him into doing this "eentsy weetsy" favor for her girlfriend. (He still owes her money.)

Luffy, Zoro and Franky help with carrying the heavy things. Usopp and Franky do the lights and music set-up. Sanji does cooks the food and the rest help with decorations and setting up different attractions.

Once the event began, they put Franky and Robin in the haunted house, Book has a performance, Luffy is let to run around because he can't stay in one place and so on everyone is at attractions. Sanji thought he was going to be at the food stands, but then Nami drags him aside to an empty standalone booth. What was even more confusing was that Zoro also had one right next to his.

Nami as if talking to toddlers: You guys are gonna be on kissing booth duty, isn't that exciting?!

Zoro: Wtf? No, I'm not doing that.

Nami, taking out her phone: Let's see, January - 50, February - 25, Match... wow 140 that's a lot, huh? Anyways, April -

Zoro: Okay, okay I get it.

Zoro got a line of beautiful girls, some young some old, but his attitude is the same for all of them. Irritation with slight boredom. Sanji on the other hand, had only a handful of women. Most were Okamas and his line was still twice smaller than Zoro's.

Sanji agrees because he would live to kiss pretty ladies. He doesn't need convincing, but Nami throws in a "I'm putting the two most handsome boys on these stands after all" just to ensure Sanji stays.

She also ended up giving them a quota to fulfill.

In their "hygiene break", Sanji grabs him by the collar and gets real close to his face.

Sanji: You think you're all that just because you got more ladies? Huh?

Zoro smiling for the first time since the festival started: Are you jealous of them, cook? Of you want a kiss, you gotta pay me first.

Sanji becomes furious and starts shouting at him but then a lady from the ones waiting speaks up.

Woman: Um, actually, I'd pay to see you two kiss.

Sanji: ...

Sanji: Pardon? Je ne comprends pas. ("I don't understand" in french)

Zoro looks at the woman: You have the money?

Woman: Yes.

And she put the money in the slot.

Zoro smiles again and shrugs: Welp, money's money. Works for me.

He grabs Sanji by the back of the neck and plants a kiss on his lips. It was short and as if out of spite. Not in a bad way. Im fact Sanji was surprised how much "not in a bad way" it was. His lips were soft and soaked in long overdue passion. He couldn't dare say it was in a good way though, he still had some pride to admit it.

Still, he was frozen in place.

Another "client" raised their hand in the air holding money: I want the same thing, please!

Zoro nodded and kissed Sanji again, ironically enough it broke Sanji's trance-like state. He was a bit too aware of everyone's eyes on them.

Zoro, amused and absolutely sure Sanji wouldn't do it, tilts his head in the person's depreciation, he laughed: You heard the clients, so what ya gonna do love cook?

A third person from the back, throwing in three times the price: I'll pay triple for Sanji to kiss him.

Sanji furrows his brow, takes a deep breath and pulls Zoro into a deep and passionate kiss that caught everyone off guard. Once he pulled away, they were both out breath and everyone was watching them wordlessly.

After a long moment of Sanji's determined eyes looking into Zoro's pleasantly shocked ones, the cook looked back at the people and announced: That's the last show your getting from us. Booths are open again.

After that, until the end of the night qt least eight more people asked if they could make them kiss each other again, but they said "no".

Afterwards Zoro was pulled aside before they could go to the others. He got pinned to the wall, Sanji's hands leaning on either side of his head. They were sharing air, almost like when they were fighting but if felt so much more intimate this time for some reason.

Sanji: Stop me if you don't like what I'm about to do.

After which Sanji kissed Zoro again. Not being watched must have been a factor, because if Zoro guessed by his movements and kisses, Sanji was no longer holding back on him.

Zoro never stopped him.

[chronicallyblyrie]

TMAGP 20 Live thoughts! spoilers ahead

this one is a day late simply because I'm on summer break now and I'm already forgetting what day of the week it is

-I already saw something in the description about ink5oul lets go I'm ready

-okay its our little trio hi guys

-Alice i swear to god fucking LISTEN TO HIM PLEASE

-Who killed it???

-whaaaat??

-Oh shoot is this going back to the ennacting the protocol thingy??

-the government conspiracies are fun though Alice :(

-ah yes the case that made Isaac Newton canon to the TMAGP lore

-no its definitely the same protocol

-WHAAAAT

-oh god its another email from John isnt it

-gibberish email address???

-Okay so Alice does believe in the horrors then???

-I mean yeah Sam she is very right you chose to work for the government that is the most shady thing you can do

-oh so they were trying to end the world AGAIN

-Celia might just be right, its almost like she has PRIOR EXPERIENCE

-yessss keep celia in on this shit show please

-GWEEN

-IN5OUL??

-Oh! tattooing corpses!

-Gwen is not the type for tattoos ink5oul

-"you've got lovely skin" that was a very nikola orsinov line

-Yes the government

-No they want you as an "external"

-Yeah shes new sorry ink5oul

-So they dont even wanna mutilate people with tattoos???

-So somehow having fans made them into an avatar or smth??? im just guessing externals and avatars are basically one in the same

-is this our statement/case for today

-this podcast really makes you look at social media in a different way

-tattooed WHAT

-damn so this is where the fucked up ink comes from that mutilates people right?

-yeah as a tarot lover I can't tell if I'd be pissed off too or if I'd be happy with the tattoo artist giving me a detailed ass sun tattoo after lying and showing me the wrong design

-"ITS BUUUUURNS"

-oh!

-oh so this is how you become an avatar

-guys.. I think I know how to kickstart my youtube career

-I imagine Gwen just standing here rn while listening to this mf yap

-so the tattoos are the ultimate anti-aging skincare

-rather disturbing is probably putting it lightly

-CHEMICAL COCKTAILS??

-were they chloroforming these clients

-mf you get a high on tattooing???

-okay so definitely an avatar, the whole talk of "wanting to make people afraid" and "needing" it is just a fear avatar needing their daily dose of people being horrified

-Oh so thats why they have corpses

-eloquent indeed!

-GWEN THEY ARE GOING TO KILL YOU SHUT TF UP

-WTF

-GWEN IS GONNA GET FUCKING KILLED SHE NEEDED THAT SECURITY

[turnaboutfromnowhere]

INVESTIGATION PART 1

Looks like a certain detective is up for questioning, read below for the story.

Claus: ..Are we done?

Lucas: there are some things bothering me-

Claus: I already told you ..everything.

You see the boy touching a part of his shoulder, close to the neck.

Pw: ...?

Hey, Claus?

Whats that?

Claus: ...!

Claus: I-its nothing!

You guys should leave already, dont you have to investigate?!

Pw: But-

Claus: I don't wanna talk about it, Why can't you just leave?!

Pw: (even if i press, Its best to leave it at that. I dont want him to dislike me.)

Lucas: ....

_________________________________________

Lucas: ..I just dont get it..

He was never like this

Pw: Hm?

Lucas: I know you just met him and me..And That wasnt a great of a first impression of your client.. was it?

Lucas: im just worried. And he's hiding alot too.

Im scared that he really is...

...Forget it! Lets just go already!

_________________________________________

April 20th 12:50 Am

Tazmilly Village

Pw: i..i didnt know it would be so far away..! Is..this what you mean by "close"?!

Pw: Did we..really need to walk all the way from here?!

Lucas: It's not that bad!

It was just 30 minutes

Pw: (it felt like an eternity to me)

Pw: ...you mean you can do that entire trip to the village just by walking??

Lucas: ..Well, yeah

Pw: oh.

Lucas: Besides, We need to do this entire track to go to the city. You get used to it after a while

Pw:  ... (.. Maybe I should start hitting the gym.)

April 20th 12:50 Am

   Pigmask office

As you step foot inside, you take a glance to see the décor, blues and greys of the floor with a weirdly shaped carpet, the walls and cealing both seem fairly normal, two rooms. theres a Pig head placed pridefully on the wall, like those of a succesfully hunted deer you see on movies

The small room at the corner is blocked out by yellow and black tape.

Pw: (Is...is this what an office is to these people? A whole building?)

Lucas: Its so..empty.

I thought there would be more officers here.

Pw: Its one less thing to worry about, i guess

Lucas: Well, no matter, Lets go investigate already, i dont want to leave Claus hanging!

Pw: Wha-?! Okay alright!

Investigation

________________________________________

The first thing you notice as you look down

Pw: (Oh..im stepping on the carpet.)

Pw: Huh?

Pw:  Its A set of footprints.

And it goes all the way to the room where the murder took place

Lucas: Mr Wright! Look closer!

Pw: Theres.. Another set!

Lucas: You can only see it on the carpet, though, and its much more lighter than the other one

Pw: You're right..(Wow. Keen eye)

Set of Footprints added to the Court Record

you put your foot away from the carpet

Pw: hm? It left a mark..

So thats how it is. This can easily stain,

(Now i feel bad for the people who'll clean this place.)

You try your best to not to dirty the carpet, walking to the next room over, where the murder took place.

_________________________________________

[EXAMINE] Something takes your attention however, a pig head. it’s not alive, at least. You think so.

Pw: (Its staring at me.)

Lucas: Uhm.. Mr Wright, What are you doing..?

Oh. Uh..

Did he hunt a wild pig for that?

Pw: i don't think so. He doesn't seem like the kind.

Lucas: you dont even know him, you know its bad to judge someone just because of that, right?

Pw: (Says you.)

Its just.. creepy

Lucas: i think its more sad than creepy

Pw: (i think i felt a shiver down my spine)

I can't imagine what it must've felt like for this pig, your head being glued to a wooden plate for...this?

_________________________________________

to The next room you two go see, the scene of the crime, a much somber interior with lots of shelves and items.

Pw: (Since There are no police officers here.. i wonder if they would mind..)

Lucas: ..can we go there?

Pw: Why not? Let's see here...

You hear footsteps getting closer as you try to take a closer look

Gumshoe: HEY WHAT'RE YOU DOING?!

Lucas: ..?!

Pw: O-oh! D-detective Gumshoe!

Lucas: Gum..shoe?

Gumshoe: You're trying to sneak into the crime scene, pal?!

Pw: ..Uhh.. (Caught right in the act..!)

Lucas: We..we weren't trying to investigate up close at all!

..ugh.

Pw: (nice one)

Gumshoe: and who are you? You look familiar

Lucas: Um ...im Lucas.

Im the suspect's brother, actually.

Gumshoe: Oh so thats why! You both do look similar!

Lucas: Really? So- did you interrogate him? Is there anything new you guys got?

Gumshoe: sorry pal, that's confidential

And it doesn't seem good for your brother, he confessed after all

Lucas: ...Alright.

Gumshoe: H-Hey, I-i mean there's gotta be some other way to prove otherwise!

Pw: (Maybe i should ask some more questions too)

>Talk

>Present