#im soo fucking sick of it
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awek-s · 1 year ago
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ohhhh desperately need to leave this house before i kill myself I fear it’s coming 🤣🤣
#had kind of a huge fight w my mom over like mental#illness and like I ended up letting out all the anger I feel at the fact that she didn’t take me to the hospital to get diagnosed when I was#15 despite me begging her to. so I had to wait til I went to university to get diagnosed. which is 90% of the reason I’m struggling to live#so much nowadays. and obviously she was like. uh I don’t remember that! and the more detail I told her the quieter and less defensive she#got. bc she knows I’m right.#this all started bc one of her friends’ older son just got diagnosed w schizophrenia and she was like if that was me I wouldn’t have stuck#by him so long I would’ve kicked him out long ago . and I snorted and I was like yeah I know you wouldn’t have just like you didn’t for me#nd I told her to just stop talking about shit she doesn’t know fucking anything about. bc obviously she doesn’t think her friend’s son is#actually sick. im talking SICK sick like meds won’t work and he keeps getting in serious trouble w the law. and my mom is an asshole she#thinks all sick ppl use it as an excuse bc she thinks only her life experiences are valid#im soo fucking sick of it#I’ve wasted my entire life trying to educate her about shit and it just doesn’t stick she just goes and babies herself and im miserable#for my entire existence#I can’t do it anymore like any of it I want to get out of here and live my stupid life#without somebody who reminds me every day that they think I’m a waste of existence lmao#mrow.org
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blighted-lights · 4 months ago
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i think it'd be rlly funny if ravage and minimus hated each other btw. the only reason they get along is bc of their mutual connection to megatron. and even that isn't enough sometimes lmao
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lemongogo · 2 months ago
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oo u want 2 draw soo bad..
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#i hate that my ability to draw is so conditional#its soo frustrating but i dont know how to break it. this has been the one thing thats never changed.ill never be free#times like rn i just do studies but its soo fking BORINGGG euuhh...#but if i try 2 draw something for funsies i just stare at the blank canvas. literally immobile. & u know how people r like just draw#something anyways. a line. something. and its like no i cant do that oi cant even do that u underestimate my freak#i want 2attack myself from the pov of someone else#i think im having the realization tht i will never be able to do art stuff frls and its driving me crazy i think.#like im actually sick and unwell frm the thought of it.my friend commissioned me and im ab 2 send the money back#after two weeks bc i cant do it im literally frozen dude.i want 2 cry and die and explode into a million pieces#wait im back to add more.idk if anyone feels the same way but its like. i know its entirely a Me issue its a mental block issue#theres something thats not connecting in my head but its like.why is it so easy for everyone else ykwim...and thats a lie too right#like everyone else struggles w art and its not.it cant exist Without you struggling and practicing hard and trusting yourself#but in my brain im just convinced that like.i cant do this i cant do this like everyone else can do it like second nature and it freaks me#tf out#but also its the one thing i want to do more than anything else in my life and so like if i cant do it i dont know what to do.ughh.#not me freaking the fuck out rn lawl.lols.even#and on top of it i feel like i cant express myself well and i think my friend. < SOOO awesome and well meaning and NICE and legitimately#pushing me to try and believe that i can do this stuff but i feel like they wont understand the sort of like.mental block im struggling wit#like its less that i hate my art or something i dont its more like.i just feel soo physically restrained and incapable of doing it.suddenly#i cant think and i cant do anything.i have no creativity i have no ideas my mind is quite literally blank and empty
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nyaskitten · 1 year ago
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Ninjago fans actually have no concept of "this will be elaborated on/given more attention to in later seasons" and to be fair yeah no one expects that from FUCKING NINJAGO because of how disconnected all of 11-min era Ninjago feels from every other season but... come on this isn't a new idea exclusive to Ninjago other shows do this shit alllll the time do you people not watch other shows???n
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sophaeros · 2 months ago
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btw in case you havent seen my twitter this is my "this user still thinks julian casablancas is a shithead" note appended to every post about him in spirit. hes right in some ways and really stupid in others and is either way very annoying
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spaciebabie · 1 year ago
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Reminding you of your place
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🖕🖕🖕🖕
you asskopl
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cadaverre · 3 months ago
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IM SO SICK OF MYSELF, RATHER BE RATHER BE ANYONE ANYONE ANYONE ELSE, JEALOUSY JEALOUSY STARTED FOLLOWING ME
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possvmtooth · 2 years ago
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so i heard br*mblestar fuckin retired?? it's about time??? (no i will not ever draw the same cat the same way more than once)
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magefelixir · 25 days ago
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my life after leaving the scream fandom
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shooks-stupid-stuff · 10 months ago
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2024 is not my year, can we restart? can we just skip to 2025? please i am dying
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billygaysanguine · 11 months ago
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why is every audiobook reader after rupert degas fucking allergic to scapegrace. guys cmon
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temperate-rainforest · 10 months ago
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I always forget how people back in the olde days used to just die so easily from the flu, until I get the flu myself dhhdhdhf because on one hand I know our medicine is just soo much better now a days but on the other hand I have the immune system of a dead man and once I get sick I'm like the ye olde victorian child on a death bed dhdhdhhd it's been 4 days and I just NOW can get on my phone to watch videos and text, and eat and drink water, and coherently string words together and do more than just lay in bed and moan in pain, and sweat and cough in sick delirium 😭
#im being so deadass#i only slept once between just staring at whatever i was hallucinating on the ceiling and that was last night#and i dreamt that i was eating glass#i know its because ive hurt my stomach and ribs from so much coughing because i can barely talk#at least in my dream i was picky about the glass i was eating LMAOOO i was like NO I WANT THE BUBBLE AMBER DRINKING GLASS NOM NOM#and raided a flea market just to find it and eat it#i dont fucking know#i finally ate some chicken noodle soup and apple sauce too and ive finally had some wonderful and amazing water#i swear i never enjoyed it more in my LIFE#i hate being sick because i get so sick so easily and soo soo so bad#fucking rough man#i had no idea it was Saturday until i just checked#fucking was Tuesday last I remembered god damnit#also its really scary looking in the mirror because I dont look well or look like myself right now#body image warning#but my face looks so hallow and dark and scratched up because apparently I either was scratching in my sleep or something happened#and I'm soo much thinner than the last time I looked in a mirror and got out of bed like 4 days ago#my beard is big and shaggy and i need to shave but i really really don't look good and its hard to do any self care#when you go from looking healthy and glowy to pale and dark and thin in just a couple days#like fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck that#im caught in a state of#this isn't reality#which i know isnt safe or good but ill be okay because i know im just in shock and that i cant push myself through it#especially in this weakened state#i just need to take it slow and steady#drink my water stay in my blanket and eat what i can and take my meds and thank FUCK I came through the fog and rest
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meep--tm · 1 year ago
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FINISHED BG3 WITH YABIS
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pleasedontcareaboutme · 5 months ago
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I'm sad today but I can't cry for some reason so
Imma just link songs that make my brain go djis8ekeeikeke9sks so I hope imma feel better and hope you feel good too
everyone thank Imai for music that makes me feel like I am a washing machine
I love it jdiskemeokekwksmsoowowkekejejwn I love BT :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((<(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍🤍💜💜💜❤️❤️💜❤️❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️🤍👁️👁️🤍👁️❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️🤍❤️❤️☹️❤️❤️🥹🤍💙🥹💙💙🤍💙💙🤍
some other stuff that make me go nrenejnenene actually idk what that last song is i found it in spotify and it kind of kills ms for some reason but like in a what the hell way. like its kinda good but its not idk its good
uwuwhejwjejwjwjei3iej3jj2jwjejjejejejejejejejeijekke like seriously what do you do when you feel frustrated but cant seem to let it out. imsmsmsmksmekskekejejekejejejejejejejejejjeieieiejjeoeiejejiwiwjwheje i feel so helpless omg.
usually j private these posts but idk maybe it will help me fele better if i post thid but also what tje fuck am i doing and what the fuxk is wrong with me
Sorry please dont care about this
i just idk who to talk to and i cant even explain anything i feel even if somebody listens so imma just scream into the void today
but please dont feel sorry and dont care jm just gonna have my period or some shit but i feel sad andd d notjing takeeess it awas todayysyyyyyyyyyyyy
dmdkdkdkkeororo4o4p4p3oo3o3keo4o4oo3o3o3o3o3oo3o3o3o3oo3o4o4o4orkkrorororkrkrkkrororo4kroro4k3ii3oroeo4oeoeori94949499494o394o4o39299393oei3i3ieiei3i
i want to boop a snooott :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
please boop my snoot :((((((((
im not drunk im just clinically insane
i just want to feel reckless once and act on impulse so imma just Post this
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lemongogo · 2 years ago
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four-two-six · 9 months ago
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hii i made beignets heres a picture
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would you like the recipe?
originally from binging with babish, check out his yt video and recipe here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnuHzHHwqAw https://www.bingingwithbabish.com/recipes/beignetsfromchef
but i have edited the recipe due to nondairy and nongivingafuck constraints, so here is my version i think this made about? 2 dozen for me? will depend on the size you go for. also this is very basic, add vanilla, extra spices, toppings, etc. at your own discretion and risk INGREDIENTS -4 cups soymilk (or whatever you wanna use <3) -2 packets (more precisely, 4tsp) active dry yeast -2 1/2 tbsp sugar -22oz (bit under 5 cups?) bread flour -1/2 tsp baking soda -1/2 tsp kosher salt -at least 2 quarts vegetable oil (you can filter/save this for another day!) -just a lot of extra flour. at least a cup. you will want that. -absolute metric fuck ton of powdered sugar. RECIPE!! -heat soymilk to approx 110°F for ideal yeastage; add yeast and sugar, stir to combine, allow to ~fester~ for 10 mins -meantime, dump into a stand mixer bowl your bread flour, baking soda, and kosher salt, mix or whisk to combine -add yeaststuff to dry ingredients, use dough hook attachment to mix for 3-4 mins. it will be VERY VERY STICKY, this is NORMAL, just ensure it's homogeneous. -cover with a hot damp cloth, set aside at room temperature (you can carefully use your oven if your room temperature is currently "too fucking cold") for an hour until doubled in size. trust me, it will go crazy. at this point the dough is ready, you may roll out and fry immediately if you so desire. otherwise, transfer to a lightly oiled bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and fridge for up to 2 days until you're ready. once you are: -pour vegetable oil into a large pot (you want a few inches of room both above and below oil surface!), preheat it to 370°F ideally checking with a digital thermometer (you can do this once dough is ready or have someone else do it while you work, if you're worried abt starting fires) -LIBERALLY flour your (very clean!!) counter and hands, plop out the dough, and just Cake That Thing in flour. no- no, you need more flour. correct. -roll dough out to ~1/4 inch thickness, maintaining as rectangular a shape as you can. using a pizza cutter, trim into rectangle (save the scraps and re-roll/cut them too!), and then cut a bunch of smaller rectangles out of it. -when your dough and oil are ready, gently (and without crowding) plop 3-5 pieces of dough in the pot. they will sink, bubble a lot, then rise to the surface and puff up as they cook. if it don't bubble, the oil's not hot enough. -give them like a minute on both sides, pull each beignet out once deeply golden brown and let it drain on a rack or parchment paper sheet. -dust H E A V I L Y with powdered sugar and get the next batch going; serve them HOT AND FRESH! (they're best like that, but they keep for as long as you'll take to eat em, guaranteed /silly) now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to go eat enough of these to get sick.
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