#im so tired i could eat a horse

[goawaymars]

target bullshit

i started my job as a starbies barista at target and ima just tell ya the random stuff thats happened since our store opened a week ago

-a lady asked for 24 pumps of classic syrup in her tea

-my coworker put a cookie in the oven and it caught on fire

-5 different 70+ year old white people have come and yapped at us for not having seating

-watched ap (store security) rip a book out of some screaming ladies hands and walk away

-had several people drive over two hours just to check out the new target store

-store director held a drawing for all the team members who completed their training to win a mannequin since we had extras (my friend won one and keeps scaring the shit out of their boyfriend)

-met someone named isis

will update soon

ignore the quiz idk how to get rid of it

[your-mothers-wife]

I'm running off of a total of three hours of sleep, a sausage egg McMuffin, and a fuck ton of anxiety. I feel ready to destroy the world or die trying.

[jorvikzelda]

today i came to the conclusion for the 2nd time that i probably 100% have an iron deficiency so its. time to go to the doctor about that one i think.

[sturniolosangel]

save a horse ride a?

warnings: best friend dynamic, innocent bambi!reader, experienced!matt, flirting, kissing, thigh riding, corruption in a way, not proof read as always

a/n: first day of kinktober baby! i really hope you guys enjoy the whole month of fics! this is just a small of what big things are coming all puns intended. as always i🤍u

summary: reader is starting to obsessed over the farm life especially cowboys. what happens when matt takes her to the country and dresses the part?

i sat happy in front of matt as he showed me an air bnb he rented for the two of us on the country side. “matt i didn’t think you would actually book the trip” i spoke softly. “of course anything for you but go pack your bags we leave tomorrow morning” he replied back. i sat up almost skipping to my bedroom to pack up my stuff.

once i was done grabbing all of my things it was around 8pm and matt said he had ordered food so i walked downstairs to meet him. “love hurry the foods gonna get cold” he slightly raised his voice. “i’m here calm down” i giggled. i sat with him as i put on a show while matt go the food ready.

as soon as we were done eating i was wiped out an ready for bed. “matt come onn im tired” i grabbed his hand dragging him up the steps.

the next morning..

me and matt are sitting in the car his hand on my thigh as he drove. “we’re here i’ll help you get your stuff just go unlock the door the code is 5555” matt spoke lightly as he got up. “on it” i smiled as i got up to the door.

all of our stuff was now unpacked and matt had planned horse riding for us so i started to get ready. i chose a red and white plaid dress and some brown cowgirl boots. “love! are you almost ready we have to leave soon” matt yelled from down the steps. “yeah i’m about to be done” i yelled back.

i walked down the steps to meet a very hot matt with a red and black plaid button up with a black cowboy hat. i felt a werid feeling in my body as a wet patch started to grow in my underwear. “so how do i look?” matt ask softy. “really good you know i gotta thing for cowboys” i whispered back. matt smirked as he grabbed his keys and waved his hand to follow him outside.

we arrived to farm as i saw all the pretty horses. “i want that one” i said as i pointed to white one. “i want this one” matt replied to the black one ironically standing next to the white one. i giggled as the instructor helped us get each of the horses.

i already knew how to ride a horse but seeing matt struggle was the best part. as the horse picked up the saddle rubbed in the right spot as i gasped out. matt came next to me on his horse “you okay” he asked “yeah just fine” i replied as i blushed.

matt was now infront of me and god did he look good. this unfamiliar feeling rose in my body again and i felt like i had an itch that i couldn’t scratch. when we were done i make sure to get a picture of matt and us with the horses.

as we got back to the air bnb i had to ask matt about what i was feeling was bothering me so bad i felt like i was gonna burst. “matt.. can you please come here” i called out from the bedroom. i could hear footsteps getting closer. “yeah what’s wrong love?” he said coming into the room.

“i feel something very weird and i think i might need help” i spoke softly. “what’s it that you’re feeling” he questioned. “it’s like an urge down there and i have no idea what to do like it almost hurts” i said embarrassed. matt seem to understand and wasn’t confused at all “come here baby” he patted his thigh.

i got up and sat up on his thigh and wrapped my hands around his neck. “can you help me?” i questioned desperately. “i got you, just be patient” he whispered. he grabbed my waist as he slowly rocked my hip back and forth on his jeans. i threw my head back as i felt some relief.

“feels really good matt” he took my face in his palm an connected our lips. i groaned into his mouth as my hips started to move on their own. he disconnected our lips to lift me up to my feet to reach his hands under my dress to slide off my panties.

“sit back down baby” he spoke a little more demanding. i sat back down on his thigh as i felt a new type of feeling. he pushed on my waist to add pressure as i rocked my now bare pussy against him. “fuck..” i moaned out.

matt took his flannel off and threw it on the floor leaving him with a black tank on. his lips started to leave kisses along my neck and his hands started to kneed my boobs through my dress. my hips bucked onto his thigh not knowing how this could feel so good. “matt i need to feel your touch.. please” i whined out.

“like this baby” his thumb started to rub my clit as my eyes rolled back and my back arched. “yes! fuck that feels amazing” i almost screamed out.

i felt the pressure build up in my stomach as i put my head in his neck as my hand slide up to his cowboy head and gripped my fingers around it. “that’s it love keep going you’re doing so good” matt spoke into my ear.

i picked up my paste as i felt the wetness spread onto his pants. “matt i think im gonna!…” before i could finished i was cumming all over matt’s leg as i gripped on his shirt and my legs started to shake. “good girl you feel better now?” matt said rubbing my back.

“so much better matt but i’m so tired” i spoke cuddling my head into his neck. “it’s okay baby we’ll go get a bath” he picked me up and took me to the bathroom as he sat me on the counter and started the bath. he started to take my clothes off and his and he picked me up once again and sitting us in the bathtub.

“if you ever have the feeling when you’re with me tell me you know i’ll always help my baby” he whispered. i rolled my head back onto his chest. “of course who else would i be so comfortable with asking” i said slowly closing my eyes to relax.

liked by matthew.sturniolo, christophersturniolo, madisonbeer and 1,275,529 others.

yn.yln: how does it go.. save a horse ride a? @/ matthew.sturniolo

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liked by yn.yln, christophersturniolo, nicolassturniolo, and 1,100.637 others.

mathewsturniolo: maybe the farm life isn’t that bad @/ yn.yln

view all 230,826 comments

a/n: i’m sorry this took me forever to get out today but trust everything will be posted everyday just takes time. i hope you enjoyed the little insta post at the end as well trying some new things! also some tags aren’t working so bare with me! i🤍u

taglist! @mattsbitchh @st7rnioioss @sweetlikesug4rvenom @ivysturnss @lormyaaa @slut4m4tt @sarahlovesyoualot @ilovemattsturniolo35 @melspam @daisy011 @matts-myloverboy @tsturniolo4 @mattsturnswife

[cheatsykoopa98]

its 4 AM and im trying not to freak out, let me write something to see how I feel

Her eyes opened and closed repeatedly, slowly. The dim light coming from the window let her know that it was daytime, everything felt so fuzzy. What had happened? What time was it? Her arm reached to her side looking for something on her counter. Glasses? Phone? She didn't know for sure yet. Slowly she realized, this was not her room, it was clean, white walls with a brown carpet. She sat by the side of the bed, still not fully awake, feeling the soft carpet on her feet. It then came to her: She needed her glasses, and quickly reached for them again. A yawn overcame her and as her thoughts became clear, she noticed her surrounding. It was a very tidy bedroom, with horse decorations on the counter by the other side of the bed. Figurines and a small pony plushie sat by it. The half open closet door had a coat hanger with skirts and sweaters on it, barely visible coming out of it. She scratched her eyes under her glasses. Another yawn. It had been long since she felt so... Calm? Paying no mind to the apparently unfamiliar bedroom, she moved her feet around the sides of the bed, looking for any kind of footwear. She felt the rubber of a sole under the bed. Her crocs. Quickly she put it on with only her foot, while the other moved around looking for the pair. Another object touched her foot, a soft one, a slipper. Slightly bothered but too lazy to find each pair, she finally got up, opening the bedroom door. The morning sunlight blinding her for a second before her eyes adjusted to it. She could hear a faint noise not tol far away, the sound of someone talking, and the smell of food being prepared. Following it, she found the kitchen. The smell of grease from the fried eggs with bacon got to her nose and made her realize how hungry she was.

"Uh... Hello?" She muttered with a grumbly morning voice. Her head was still not wrapped around everything. It felt so comforable yet so alien. As if she had travelled to a different culture and was kindly taken in by some nice hosts.

"Oh did I wake you up? I'm so sorry, I shouldn't leave my phone so loud..." A woman in her 30s took notice of her. She was making breakfast while listening to the morning news on her phone, quickly grabbing it and turning off the livestream it was tuned to.

"Don't worry..." She muttered in response. She tried to take a closer look at the woman. She had curly reddish brown hair, small lips and a round nose. Her face was filled with freckles that were clearly visible despite her tan skin. What took some time to notice, though, was everything about her eyes. At first she thought she was seeing things, but upon looking more and more she could confirm. One eye blue, the other brown, both very bright. Even with her tired face one could see genuine happiness in them.

"Am I... Dreaming?"

"Aaw, you're still a little sleep groggy! Come here" The woman with bright eyes pulled a chair, inviting the other to sit down. As she did, the woman put a plate and silverware in front of her, with fried eggs and bacon.

"I think I don't usually have breakfast, but... Thank you" She tried to smile, but she was still confused. She had to ask.

"Is this really not a dream? I'm... not sure what to think"

"Oh, well... I can't say I do either, honestly" The woman responded. "If you don't like it I can make something else! I can go out and buy..." The woman suddenly appeared to be getting nervous.

"No, this is good, but... Where am I? I remember the circus..." Suddenly the woman held her hand.

"The circus is gone Pomni... I mean, Pam. Everything is fine now" It was all clear now. Pam. Pamela! She had escaped that horrible nightmare. This wasn't just some woman, it was her wife. Tears came to her eyes.

"Oh... You're right..." Pamela smiled a bit, feeling whole while taking one of the bacons to eat.

"I know it's our first day out of the hospital, I just wanted to make it special, you know? I don't like thinking you're having a bad first experience..." Annie tapped her fingertips on the table nervously.

"Rag... Annie... This is delicious, did you know that?" Pamela had a bigger smile on her face, a genuine one she couldn't have afforded for years.

"Look... I'm sorry, this is all so new to me... I just... Thank you..."

"Hey, it's all cause I love you!" Annie winked and did finger guns at Pamela's direction, waving them around in a "get it?" motion. Pamela giggled. They kissed.

"I've been wanting to do that for so long..." Pamela muttered close to Annie's lips, as they both smiled looking at each other passionately.

"We'll be doing that a lot, new stuff" Annie smiled as they kissed once more. Suddenly, Annie's phone vibrated on the kitchen counter, getting both of their attention. Annie picked it up, looking at the screen, a familiar number

"It's work stuff" She showed the phone screen to Pam, rolling her eyes, to which she giggled a bit.

"Hello?"

As Annie talked on the phone, her usual look of happiness faded. Whatever she heard shook her. She fell sitting on the floor, sliding down the side of the counter. Pamela jumped in to aid her wife.

"W-What happened?! What did they say?!" She questioned, anxious and scared. Maybe she did not want to hear the answer.

"A new adventure is about to begin! And what circus is complete without it's performers?!"

"w-what?"

"It's time to come back, Pomni! Your time out is on time out!!!"

Pamela looked behind her. No kitchen. No house. Just the monstrous, gigantic dentures and millions of eyes everywhere, looking at her. The mere sight of it was enough to make her dizzy. Looking closer, she realized she stood atop a giant pole, ready to jump into a tiny pool.

"Caine... What the..." As words couldn't leave her throat. Where was Annie? Pomni spun around trying to find her, only to lose her balance and fall.

She couldn't scream, for her lungs were filled with tears, and with a gurgling noise, she hit the floor next to her couch. A dream. There was no daylight. She remembered this place. Her run down apartment. All she could afford. Her clothes scattered on the bed, waiting to be folded. Paper bags from groceries she forgot to take out close to a full trash can. The living room illuminated by her phone, which she was watching videos on before falling asleep.

She was breathing heavily, her eyes jolting around, looking for danger anywhere, but still she was unable to move or turn around. Just shaking and moving her eyeballs. She bit her nails and scratched her cheeks. It was like second nature to her. She felt like crying, but was too scared to let her guard down.

That is, until she felt a hand touching her hair. It was clumsy, but still soft.

"Hmrr... Are you ok, Pam...?" A sleepy voice grumbled. Annie's voice, much to Pamela's surprise. As it slowly came back to her.

"I... Had a nightmare... About the circus again..." She said with teary eyes. Annie grumbled something she couldn't make out, before slowly pulling Pamela back to the couch, closer to her. She could feel Annie's soft skin and soothing smell. Her soft carressing on her hair. The safety and warmth of her embrace. Slowly but surely, she felt home.

[voidwritesstuff]

High Huntress' Helping Hand

cw: none as far as im aware.

Summary: Despair is not feeling his usual undead self, so Death goes to ask for the help of the High Huntress, avatar of the Terran goddess of the earth, Draco.

A/N: The concepts about Terra,the high huntress and their gods and any of the concepts relating to terra and portrayed in this fic belong to me.

Its my original series ive been cooking up for 8 years now. Here you go dem, as promised a tiny sneak peek of what the wonderful lands of Terra have to offer! (@darkdemeter

Death wasnt fond of visiting this world. He knew the magic of this place would have his sister feral with Curiosity, and he didnt like the idea of having to baby sit her so she didnt raze the cities of Terra in search of arcane knowledge.

But he had no choice here, Despair has been acting odd for a few good days and it had worried the rider enough to ask for the help of the high huntress.

He stands there in the shadow of a weeping willow within the ever green fields of the Tierras Salvajes- Or the wild lands as the translation indicated.

Above he sees the massive shadow of a gryffin. He sees the way its barn owl head peers down to meet his gaze before slowly descending upon to sunflower field. Mounting atop the massive beast sat the high huntress, looking somewhat pleased at his presence.

--Death...afternoon.

--High huntress...-- he greeted without much enthusiasm.

His companion hopped down from the gryffin and their heavy boots fell upon the ground with a solid,dry impact. He could see the large dark wood staff that hummed and glowed slightly with a yellow brightness,he supposed it to be the magic of its owner.

--What seems to be the issue?--The terran has asked,their green,double slit dress billowed with the gentle breeze. They are covered in leather and gold armor of intricate patterns reflecting growing vines,hives and blooming flowers. Their decorative chains clink together and the gold wire dragon helmet atop their head is pushed upwards for comfort.

--Despair has been...odd. I cannot figure the reason...

--Oh,you sweet poor thing.

Up until now Despair had laid down, feeling devoid of more life than what was usual. The mare huffed and leaned into the high huntress' touch as they sat down and patted his sinewy snout.

His eyes linger on the Open back of the dress where he could see the faint outline of a fourteen petalled sunflower with a ring where the center of the flower should be.

The fourteen petals of Draco,the Lady of the wild and holy keeper of earthly balance, was a most coveted protection charm. Hes been wanting to get his hands on it for a while but stealing one would only turn him on the bad side of a very powerful goddess.

Angering the earth itself was not a Smart desicion.

--did you notice him acting odd before? Fatigue? Low apetitte?-- the terran's voice woke him from his thoughts.

He shook his head-- No. This is the first time ive seen him so tired.

--Let me ask him,then-- The high huntress pressed their hand to the amulet hanging from their neck. The fourteen petals of Draco.

They seem to take Power from it, their eyes light up a warm yellow like the purest of sunrises And speak in the Terran tongue-- What ails you, loyal steed?

--Exhaustion,mistress.

--Has your rider been feeding you?

--Barely anything.

They didnt take it the wrong way. The horsemaster hadnt been exactly forthcoming on how to take care of such phantom steeds. Death was literally just...clueless.

--Rest. Ill take care of everything else.

After that,their eyes return to normal and they stand up-- he requires sleep,and rest. I carry with me some balanced food for Sunny,but she can share. I'd suggest you feed your horse more often.

--He needs to eat?

--Less than a normal horse. But Yes. Wheat and veggies Will do. Take him to drink water and allow Him some sleep.

--One would think such arcane steeds didnt come with the weakness of their mortal counterparts.

The high- huntress shrugged,their pointy shoulderpieces making the chains that hung from them clink with the softest noise. -- They need it less. But the horsemaster seemed to skip that part.

--Why?

--You horsemen arent exactly one for lectures.

Before Death can reply,the terran goes to Grab the bag of food that the saddle of their gryiffin Carried. Each Hunter of Draco had a loyal terran gryffin- Body of a lion,head of any avian under the sun. Though hunters of the temple of Draco preffered to Keep and breed barn owls for their skills in hunting.

They Grab a bag and as their animal companion hisses,they say-- Sunny,Its a fellow animal in need. Behave-- they ruffle the feathers of the avian and then return to tend to the steed.

A humm leaves the rider's companion. They kneel to eye-level with the horse and begin tracing shapes into the dirt with a hunting Knife. Its a diamond with the alchemic symbols for water and earth.

Death watched with Keen interest as the terran puts their hand to the carving and sends a spark of their energy through their hand. He sees the marks on their back come alight briefly before subisiding,like the faint flicker of a firefly.

From the carvings comes out a flower as big as his fist. Its made of pure water like running streams yet with the shape of a normal lilly. Despair eats each petal,and with the biting of his teeth the petals dissolve into clean water.

The high huntress opens the bag of food with their Knife and allows the horse to dig in. Sunny complains behind them with a hiss and they stand up-- Be nice,Sunny.

--I believe you said she didnt mind sharing...--Always such a shit stirrer the rider was.

--I was hoping she wouldnt...--They admitted-- Hey...wouldnt you like to stay for Merienda?

--I have no interest in your "afternoon tea",High Huntress. How much for your help?

--Nothing-- They answered,hands in two cleverly hidden pockets of their armor.-- im always happy to help an animal in need,such is my holy duty.

Above them it was a clear Sky,summery warm with a cold breeze to temper the heat. It usually was beautiful, sun filled days for the Terran lands. Their stormy days were cozy,and their winters were easy to Carry through.

--My City welcomes you and your kin. There is a place for you four.

--You say it because your kind wasnt unfortunate to be pillaged by mine.

Their magic had kept them hidden from the eyes of the beings from his world. A magical barrier old as time,powerful as anything hes ever seen. Hes only able to pass because him and his siblings were invited by a terran- that was the key.

--Past is past. Our gods know that well. The balance you uphold is greatly appreciated by us. From the every day person to the highest of holy people.

--Your culture has too much faith in kindness and redemption,High Huntress.

--And you have too little,Rider-- They Walked up to him,eyes inspecting his freaky Bone mask that loomed over them.

From their back,a pair of dragonfly wings extend. They begin to buzz as they fly upwards to be at eye level with the nephilim.-- What are you planning?--He asked with disdain.

The high huntress pushed away a few of his wild hairs so his vision was unencumbered. They offer a conciliatory smile and say-- Just to help.

With that their wings fold inside their back and they drop to the ground with elegance.

Had it been anyone else, they'd be dead before they touched him. But not the high-huntress,least of all in their turf. He wasnt that stupid.

--Are you sure you dont want to stay?

Terrans didnt saw death as something to be scared of. The end of life was merely the embrace of their other mother,Ozabaz the great mantaray,queen of the Ocean. To them,death was a mother,a caretaker of those who pass.

Not something to be afraid of.

The rider guessed that was why none of the Holy people here carried ill Will to him and his kin.

--Even if I wanted to. I cannot. Duty calls.

--As always--they agreed,knowing too well that unfinished bussiness were the rule for people like them.. leaders-- Well,come by when youre free. Youre welcomed here,and my temple too. We May even have a feast

It did sound amusing at least...

Both turn to Despair as the mare stands up. The food had been magically infused with fast acting nutrients. No wonder the steed was back to its old self.

It trots to the high huntress and nuzzles their face,betraying the true feelings of his master for the terran before him.

--Youre welcome,Dis--They pat the equestrian's snout and let him gallop to his owner-- I believe...this is goodbye

--'Tis indeed

Before he can mount his horse,his companion grows a simple sunflower for him. Small,easy to Carry. They tuck it on his belt as an invitation to come visit.

He only nodds,then hops on his steed and gallops away at full speed to the portal he came from. Being trailed by the watchful eye of a gryffin,knowing its there to Keep him safe in his trip to the arcane gate.

Perhaps...he Will come visit.

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Could I mayhaps ask for your thoughts on each of the Box Legendary Pokemon?

*cracks knuckles* SURE! let's do this

Gold and Silver: I actually don't feel suuuuper too strongly about Ho-oh and Lugia, tbh--though i will say they both have more solid designs than. A Lot of other johto Pokemon imo LMAO. I liked Lugia a lot when I was a kid and that affection has waned a bit as I got older but I do still think it's cool. They both have pretty solid lore as far as Legendaries go, I'm just not particularly attached to 'em...something like a Legends Johto game really has the potential to do something cool with 'em (I feel like with Ho-oh especially) and I do kinda hope we eventually get to see that.

Ruby, Sapphire, Emerald: MY HOMEEEEE Hoenn box Legendary trio sooo near and dear to me...Ruby was my first game Groudon was my first Legendary but I think he's kind of just ok. I like Kyogre a lot more and I Love Rayquaza, definitely a long time favorite Legendary...they're really just a solid trio of Pokemon with some really cool designs and concepts at play, and I like the new lore and forms ORAS gave 'em. Kyogre's Pokemon Pinball boss fight kicks ass to this day and im not kidding.

Diamond, Pearl, Platinum: MY DEAR LATE MIDDLE SCHOOL/EARLY HIGH SCHOOL FRIENDS I thinkkkk as a trio I think I might like Dialga, Palkia, and Giratina the best...Legendaries I never tire of seeing. Palkia is one of my all time favs, gazing so lovingly at my giant Palkia plush ive had for some 15 odd years...Giratina is too, honestly, Giratina fucking Rules (though I actually don't like its Origin form very much and never had...I'm an Altered Form Giratina girlie.) They're just all super solid designs and for Dialga and Palkia especially they really feel like perfect embodiments of The Game Theyre the Cover Of. Also I love Origin Form Dialga and Palkia sorry. Theyre my precious ugly as fuck horses.

Black, White, BW2: WELL. THESE MIGHT TRULY BE THE BEST ONES. Zekrom/Reshiram/Kyurem are not my favorite Trio, but together just everything they represent is so cool. One day we WILL see that Original Dragon so HELP ME GOD. I'm more impartial to Zekrom (i played Black and White 2) but it still has such a striking design, I have to say. Reshiram is an especially beautiful Pokemon and definitely one of my favorites. I have. So Many Reshiram cards and plushes HJFDJGDF And well some people don't like Black and White Kyurem for whatever reason, but well i simply have to say they have been making me crazy since high school and the concept of Pokemon Fusion Really in The Game will never not be fucking bonkers slash POS. i LOVE White Kyurem (go figure.) THATS MY FUCKIN FREEEAK

X & Y: i don't. like X & Y very much 🥴 I wish I liked Xerneas more but something about its design is just kind of lacking some 'oomph' ro me. It doesn't feel like a strong poster child for the Fairy type's debut. Despite everything Yveltal does go hard as fucking hell though I still like it a lot. I named the one I caught in Y HELLRAISER back in college and I was shocked they let me name it that.

Sun, Moon, Ultra Sun/Moon: ok nevermind scratch what I said about DPP Sun and Moon have my favorite Legendary Trio for absolute certain. GOD I WISH SUMO/USUM WERE BETTER GAMES!!!!! SOLGALEO LUNALA AND NECROZMA ARE ALL SO FUCKING COOOOL!!!!! DUSK MANE NECROZMA AND DAWN WINGS NECROZMA ARE SO FUCKING COOOL!!!!!!!!! NECROZMA FUCKING EATS THEM FOR POWER. Just in general fantastic designs all around, and it's so cool that Solgaleo and Lunala are Legendaries That Evolve.also i played Moon/UM but I have grown deeply fond of Solgaleo over the last year or so. As if it's my fault he looks like...no, I shant say.

Sword and Shield: I don't like SWSH very much either 🥴🥴🥴🥴🥴which is a shame because Zacien and Zamazenta have really cool concepts and designs!! I love their old tattered beat up forms, I love that theyre siblings 🥺I love that the one that isnt Your box legendary goes with Hop, that's so so sweet and so so cool. I just wish SWSH had more of a..........yknow. story. to do anything else of any substance with them. Cool Legendaries in bad games...sad!

Scarlet and Violet: WELL. THESE MAY ALSO BE THE BEST ONES AND I'LL SAY IT WITH MY WHOLE CHEST. god, just. WOW. I like them both a lot but I'm especially fond of Miraidon, to absolute bits. This really feels like the most realized version of a box art Legendary that really truly is a Character in its own right, you get to spend that whole game with your dragon, it well and truly Is Your Friend and it's just fantastic. Theyre endlessly charming and silly and conceptually just so fucking cool. They killed someone. My motorcycle that eats sandwiches. My BUDDY!!! I named my Miraidon Delta Accel :^)

[sebscore]

Because people say f1 is like a family here are roles I think drivers (and more I guess) would play in a family:

Seb and Lewis: tired dads who only want to be able to take a nap or kick back with a beer

Fernando: grandpa

Danny: the alcoholic uncle

Kimi: the alcoholic godfather. Will buy you alcohol

Mick: the golden child. Can't do anything wrong

Charles, Max and GZD: the chaotic trio

Lando: 7th grader going through puberty

Jensen and Mark: the neighbors who are trying to get with the dads

Nico Rosberg: the neighbor who's sorta like an uncle. Can trust. Brought you a dog for your birthday to pass your parents off

Kevin: alcoholic uncle who's been to prison. Good stories

The rest of the current grid: the kids

Oscar: emo kid

Logan and George: that one kid who's obsessed over a country. Like a horse kid

Toto and Susie: aunt and uncle. responsible. 100% trust with your life.

Yuki: Chihuahua

And that's all I could think of. As always, love your babe. Hope you stay safe ❤

💤

ps. MY O/Ls ARE TODAY IN SO NERVOUS IM GONNA FAIL AND DIE HELP??!

I don’t know who says that f1 is like a family, but I hope they’re receiving therapy at the moment, because they’re literally the definition of dysfunctional 😭😭😭😭💀💀

sewis as the parents is so right and nico would 100% buy one of the grid kids a dog if that meant it would annoy lewis and seb 💀💀💀💀💀

oscar is the quiet kid that sits in the corner and just wants to eat and sleep (he is so right for that)

also… what did poor yuki do to you ?? 😭😭😭

love you too, honey! this really made me laugh and I really needed that! 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 also, good luck with your exams (?) you’re gonna rock it !!!! ✌️✌️✌️

[milli0n-dollar-fool]

spoilers

since mr gaiman said we could maybe write our notes as we watch each episode i’m going to start doing that because i need to understand what happened the whole season LMAO im so distracted by ep*s*d* s*x

Episode 1 – The Arrival

The thing Crowley is holding looks like the thing he used to stop time

His hair is GORGEOUS

He’s so bubbly and wholesome

Aziraphale didn’t know he was helping to make the stars

This is why Crowley wanted so badly to go to the stars with Aziraphale last season

Crowley sort of refers to Aziraphale as kind of below him? Like rank-wise (note Aziraphale is a cherub?)

Aziraphale looked so hopeful introducing himself to Crowley then he doesn’t even tell him his name LMAO

HIS EXCITED SQUEAL

Is this how he wanted to watch the world go in season 1? From space with Aziraphale?

Not aziraphale thinking Crowley was referring to him with the “look at you, you’re gorgeous”

“and I think you’ve done an excellent job” shoot me now

So this is what Crowley is like with a will to live (JOKING)

“stars everywhere” didn’t he say that in the “what are they putting in bananas these days”

Help the music sliding down when aziraphale breaks the news I didn’t notice that before

Crowley’s face

‘call it a nebula’ HE’S SO PROUD OF IT

‘if I was the one running it all’ *immediately looks around nervously*

‘how much trouble can I get into just for asking a few questions’ honey you’ve got a big storm coming

THE STARS RAINING AND THE WING AHHHHHH

Love David tennant getting his name before Michael sheen in the credits

We didn’t see the blimps or raining rabbits in this season – s3?

Switched little sign thingies

THE SIGN CROWLEY WROTE ABOUT CLOSING TIMES AHH

“hello Maggie” HIS VOICE IS SO GENTLE

“what if I were to take these Shostakovich records without paying for him” HE SAYS IT SO MISCHIEVIOUSLY  

Also I love some of shostakovich’s pieces

“I’m very good at forgiveness, it’s one of my favourite things” PARALLEL TO “I FORGIVE YOU” RAHHH

I like how you can see crowleys eyes behind his sunglasses

“frozen peas” he’s not letting down his man aziraphale

She has her order memorized AHRIOAA

Head empty no thoughts goob intro

HELP ME THE BARE HUG SQUEEZE I WOULD RATHER DIE

STOP LOOKING UP AND DOWN AZIRAPHALE

‘near one particular person’ ‘no certainly not’ bffr

Was the something terrible thing heaven hunting him down

His smirk at “his royal smugness is in trouble that’s so sad” AHHHH

“you’re funny. I love you” hello?

The fly in the box heh

Aww his face after ‘what box’

I will die for Muriel  

TONE OF VOICE

“go back a long time’ ok

‘because there’s a naked man there?’ JEALOUSSSS

“is it something I can help you with?’ JEALOUSSSS

So like we were right about Crowley eating/drinking really fast

“purely selfish action’ not very angelic of you

I wonder what the rest of his keys are for

HIM PUTTING HIS GLASSES ON THE HORSE LMAO

“ask him properly” I jumped

“I am dusting” HE JUMPED LMAO

Dartmoor sherlock reference I see you

Arguing 25 minutes into the show I see

‘precious, peaceful, fragile’ man

‘if you refuse to help me you’re at liberty to go’ paralleling ep*s*d* s*x is gut wrenching  

“no, I would love you to help me” im crying he really is picking up the pace

How long was that blue car out there for  

Ngl him smiting everywhere was kinda

“you’re misunderstanding me uriel” “im understanding you very well. You think somebody should be giving orders and that someone is you” PARALLEL TO THE END

I unironically love Michael

Crowley looks so tired in his Bentley :(

For a sec I thought we were going to get traitor traitor Crowley  

The way he sprawls lmao

Beelzebub trying to find the man theyre down bad for lmao

The way they converse comfortably instead of Crowley being afraid of Beelzebub  

Aww Maggie being sheltered :(

GOOD OLD FASHIONED LOVER BOY

“theres only room for one of us in this lane and it’s not you” crying

I love how nina remembers people based off their coffee order – That’s Mr Six Shots of Expresso

“my bad” aww

The way he was listing when he did the I was wrong dance WHAT HAPPENED

Were those the years of the flashbacks I’ll check later (1650, 1793, 1941)

I love the dance I need the backstory

“very nice” rolling

“together” im crying

Parenting is going well

‘it would barely move the dials’ okay

They look so determined

Their smiles when they thought they did the miracle right aww

And theres the end of the episode folks what do we think

[snaxle]

im so tired i could eat a horse

[miss-bvnny]

Sleeping Beauty AU for my birthday? Sleeping Beauty AU for my birthday.

RIGHT off the bat, I wanna say this set's a mess and it was supposed to have more sketches in it (I REALLY wanted to draw LeFou fighting a dragon) but uhhhh .....*vague hand gestures* Emotional Issues. Will they come one day? Yeah probably. Until then...please enjoy what I managed to pull together.

1-2.)

''She's your daughter. You can't do this to her.''

''Yes I can. I'm her mother.''

First up, we got a test sketcj of Abanny as Maleficent, and a spooky-wooky headshot. Abanny was almost entirely inspired by Angelina Jolie in the live action Maleficent movie, so I could think of NO better role for her to play in this AU than the one she was made for.

Nicole was supposed to be raised by Abanny as well as her two fathers in a sort of big joint adoption found family thing. But they couldn't really get past Abanny's whole Matriarchal forest demigod who eats people thing as something they wanted their daughter around. So they kind of...booted Abanny from the group chat, let's say. Abanny's fury at being banned from having a part in her daughter's life MIGHT'VE been understandable....until Abanny decided ''Fine if I can't be a part of her life then she can't be a part of anyone else's'' and doomed her daughter to a sinister prophecy out of anger. That's the fun thing about Abanny. I can imagine her doing horrible destructive stuff to Nicole out of spite and it's not even that out of character (Any Incredibles AU fans in the audience?)

3.) ''...And a few....carrots?''

Yeah HI if this one looks funky dunky it's because it isssss *checks dates* JUST about a year old now!! This was the first Sleeping Beauty AU sketch and it has seen everything (Fnaf reference) and then I just kept thinking about this concept and that's where the rest of this stuff came from. I MEANT to rewdraw this one but uhhhh .....*vague hand gestures* Emotional Issues.

LeFou's horse is named Pompeii btw!!!! She's been a character of mine for a while, but I haven't REALLY used her for much since about 2015. Figured she deserved to be re-homed for this AU. If she looks familiar it's because yes I came up with her after watching Frozen.

4.) ''Once Upon a Time Dream''

Yes yes, you've all seen me post this one before, and Im being a hack by reposting it here and deleting it from the original photoset, but in my defense it goes with the rest of the set.

''He's wearing a totally different outfit than in the previous sketch and that doesn't make sense-'' Whoa mama mia cunt

5.) ''...When true loves kiss...''

If LeFou looks a little rough, he DID just plow through a forest of thorns to fight a dragon who also happens to be his incredibly bitter mother in law. Also battle damage is hot fight me.

6.)

Now that you're lovin me

It's so heavenly

Based on that final frame from the movie, but with like....one or two very small personal touches (Sarcasm)

...Anyway I'm tired but hey it's my birthday I made it through another year and even better I drew a lot more stuff so it's not all bad.

[nagdabbit]

I will give you a headpat, a reminder to consume actual food, and a tale request:

Tell me Mox things, tell me about why he'd have become the library and how much he loves books. Tell me about him and Claudio in the Before times, and their friendship with Bryan.

i DID remember to get a vending machine poptart when i got to work, but i did forget it in the microwave for what looks like two hours so i am eating it now!

im gonna start with your second point, and then hide a major spoiler under a cut at the end of you want it. it's not necessarily important, but it does add a bit of hamfisted context to regal's character

they were once knights together. they trained together, fought battles and won wars alongside each other. three of the most trusted and decorated knights in all the kingdom,* they should've had their own fiefdoms and their own armies to lead. but when bryan answered regal's call, mox and claudio followed. they had done everything together, their bonds forged long before they ever saw battle together. their loyalty lied with each other, not the kingdom they served.

when they moved to the mountain, rather than serving as knights, they became the marshals and stewards of the keep.

bryan, tactical and analytical and so very vicious, would lead the guard. under his watch, no intruders would get past his soldiers, no trouble would befall his lord's lands, and no taxes—no matter how small—would ever go unpaid. his presence was itself a deterrent from the fumblings and machinations of rival lords and barons that wished to grow their holdings.

claudio would oversee much of the household workings and staff, his kindness and geniality meant a boon in keeping any staff happy and loyal to their lord. he kept the books and correspondence, and would often travel to court to take regals place in political matters. he was warm and kind enough to put people at ease and be greatly under estimated, and clever and vicious enough to win whatever protections and connections his lord desired.

mox oversaw as few people as possible. he would much rather take over the duties of caring for the keeps animals and equipment, than managing a staff. he was always the most curious of them, always quietly observing and learning and cataloguing all the information he could, a skill well-suited to spywork and subterfuge. but while he could easily overhear secret plans to pass on to his counterparts, he could also use that curiosity to observe the moods of a hungry dog or a tired pack horse. he would much rather care for a stray dog, train it up into a loyal hunting hound, than take part in the politics of court.

as knights, they were a well oiled machine. they trusted each other in battle, and played off each other's strengths in politics. what plans mox could learn from the whisperings of nobles, bryan could turn into a plan for their own gain, and claudio could perform with his clever tongue and disarming manner.

outside of their abandoned knighthoods, they worked as the warmest of friends. they made a family out of each other, and far from the battlefield, they finally had a chance to experience that. their concerns were now of the harvest and the next meal and simple gossip. there wasn't a continent relying on them any longer. so claudio could tell jokes and have conversations with no hidden motives and relax into the warm man that he was, not the vicious inferno he was on the battlefield. bryan could allow himself time to simply exist, step away from the battlemaps and strategies, and let someone else do the thinking. mox could use the knowledge he'd gained for something other than death and politics, and could indulge in his desire to learn more—but learn what he wanted for himself, and learn by choice, rather than by orders.

i turned mox into the library for two reasons. one, because when sarah planted the story sapling in my brain, one of the things that i immediately thought of was ladyhawk—two lovers doomed to never be together. mox made of paper and wood, two of literally the most flammable things, kept forever from his lover who became fire. i love a tragedy, i really do. the other reason is that mox likes books and he likes reading and he likes being largely left alone, right? hes got His People and His Space and His Activities and His Things, and then there's everything else, and he's gotta want to engage with all of that. the library seems a good place to escape from the things he'd rather not deal with and the people he'd rather not talk to.

but it's also isolating, isn't it? intentionally severing even barely connected social ties cuts one off from so many opportunities. even though bryan can visit the library and open books and still speak with mox, he cut himself off in such a way that he can no longer physically engage with bryan in return. doubly so for claudio, his lover, who thematically has the exact opposite issue: he can physically engage with anything that he wants, and is forced to hold himself back at all times, else he'll destroy the man he loves most, on top of his home and his oldest friend.

* but not THIS kingdom. not the one they now reside in. this was a kingdom their own ruler once wanted to conquer, before his three most trusted abandoned their posts for a quiet life in service to a simple lord. but what reason would regal have had for recruiting the enemy, and what reason would they have had for serving someone so far below their station? what use would a simple lord have for a mage like nigel?

[slymewitch]

If you really think about it, “I’m so hungry I could eat a horse” as hyperbole is not just saying that I’m so hungry I could eat an especially large animal, but that if I was in the wilderness riding a horse, my need for food would outweigh my need for this incredibly useful animal.

Im tired and its 2am so whether this makes any sense by tomorrow is up in the air.

[xxradzxx]

Im so tired I could *remembers hay probably has feelings too so I shouldn't hit it* ...eat a horse

[algrolo]

Im so tired i could eat a horse

[yippieitsarvensart]

dont worry about the time of replies!!! we are in different timezones anyways

JDNNWBS THANK YOU ?!!?!! feel free to study me under a microscope im an interesting lil guy i think youll have a blast

oooooo yes yes i see ur vision.... the way i go with is that floyd isnt that fond of the contacts but his eyesight is so horrible that if he doesnt he bumps EVERYWHERE. jade had to put it in him the first time and hes slowwwlyyy getting used to it, but he immediately takes it off when hes in his room. floyd is very "when i put on my glasses and the walls have texture, ppl have faces & the plant have leaves" to me LOL. also side note i loooove caring azul that doesnt want to admit it so much <3

theyre girlie pops to me does this make sense. i have some hcs for their fashion too xhhshs these guys have RUINED me

would you believe me if i told you that i was already in lovw with riddle and then i did my hcs and boom. even more in love u

THIS REMINDS ME I DIDNT SAY THE RACE HCS I HAVE FOR THOSE THREE ?!?! ok so the tweels are black italians + vietnamese, while riddle is wasian (british + korean&chinese)!

OH AND I ALSO FORGOT TO SAY i hc that riddle needs glasses too :3c but she uses contacts! when hes overwhelmed he tends to isolate himself and he either tends to the hedgehos/flanmingos or tends to the garden/maze. and her meltdowns are much like her a anger fits, she just gets really really upset and wants to throw things around and behead people, hes very agressive! to calm him down you need to put him in a comfortable & familiar room, preferrably with tons of red (his favorite color), and talk to him normally about the things he likes + offer solutions to the problems until he calms down.

anyways silver > autism, narcolepsy. uses he/ him and is bissexual (no preference), but does Not get gender at all. i hc that fae's perception of gender is different than humans, and since he was raised by lilia he does not understand humans' genders. so he just goes w the flow haha. his hands are trembling slightly allll the time he cannot stop it. hes chinese + has albinism ! bc of that he gets burned pretty easily, has to eat a balanced diet and his eyesight sucks just a little, so he doesnt need any glasses or anything. yet. he has some small scars from his training, his hair is mullet-ish and very long, and he dyes it black + leaves some white strands to match w lilia. whenever he gets overwhelmed he lays flat on the grownd, belly down face on the ground, puts a blanket over himself and then just Stays There until it passes. his meltdowns are quiet he just stares off into the void and considers yanking off his ears lol. also he has some bite scars bc sebek used to bite him when he was changing his baby teeth, silver has a necklace w them!! he understands animals better than he understands ppl and he can recgonize every single species. thats his special interest btw, animals!! hes mostly a horse girlie tho <3

sebek > autism, ocd, auditory processing disorder. the reason he yells all the time is bc he cant listen very well + cant control his voice volume. he also uses he/him & is bissexual but, much like silver and bc he is a half fae, he does not get human gender. technically speaking he could be considered bigender too! i hc that in the future, he (and riddle + the tweels too) would take estrogen :3c and HE WEARS BRACES !!!! cmon crocodile teeth are kinda horrible and his dads a dentist. so. yeah. also he has some scales, but theyre so few and mostly on his arms + legs, so they are covered most of the time! hes very resistant to physical stuff, rarely feels pain and doesnt get tired easily. if he does use his magic, though, then he gets tired pretty easily, since his half human body cant keep up w the fae magic. his hair is a MESS he passes so much gel and it still sticks up a bit. hes so into the lighting motif hes COMMITED !!!! also horses just hate him for some reason. principally vorpal (riddles horse) lol. when hes overwhelmed he does push ups, runs, just trains in geneal. if its too loud he just yells SHUT THE FUCK UP and everyone is stunned so they do. he feel really bad after though djsbnds .... his special interest is malleus draconia (lol) and dragons :3c

OOOOO so cute and silly ...... ok ok i'll write something like tgat no worries :3c anything else youd like to see in the fic? i can shove smth more!!! im gonna cook. wait for me

all I could think about while readinf this was "estrogen could save them..." Like if I was bad at responding to asks that is ALL I would've said in response; but luckily I am autistic and could not bare to just leave it at that.

Jade having to help Floyd put in his contacts for the first time makes me also think that like, what if Jade has to do it every morning. Every single morning from the day they first came on land they've had to put them in for Floyd... Brotherly bonding time EHAHAHAHA But that's the only way F could get used to it, they can't do it on their own otherwise they'll mess it up or stab themself in the eye or whatever. "Having Jade do it is just easier" he says. Jade doesn't complain about it either because she'd rather have to do it for every day of their lives than have Floyd get seriously hurt because he can't see SHIT. Anyways...

Sil and Sebs having little to no connection with gender bc of being half fae/influenced by living with fae is so, so real. and true. If I'm correct, Silver is just human? And being raised by Lilia who is VERY gender in ALL sorts of ways, I think Sil may have had a few gender crisis' over the years because of it (I sure woulda), starting from a very young age. But like he's fine now he's chill with whatevevraarrrr (I LEAVE TO GO DO SOMETHING, COME BACK AND SUDDENLY NOTHING I JUST WROTE MAKES SENSE??? what is bro blabbering about. anyways.)

Overall I so so agree with all ur hcs they make so much SENSE !!!! I have nothing more to add to the rest of it you're just so correct that I can't think of anything more anything else to add to the fic errmm... uerhhmm... Well we could have maybe... *brain thinking sounds*

... I don't even remember what I said last time btu that's okay I think you should make them kiss 🔥🔥and also make up 🔥🔥 (I alr made that joke I think. I'm so unoriginal.) Uhmmm you could make riddle CRY 💧💧💧💧I don't kno w you could make them uhmm you coud uhhh *send post*