#im scared honestly
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ofstarsandmoonlightt · 8 months ago
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heLP someone said jeremy is the gansey of aftg and now i can’t unsee it aasdffghjjkkll
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murdererofthumbs · 2 years ago
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I think we can all agree, after this episode, that Roman is going down into incredibly dark spiral, which will only get worse, because he is not processing his grief, like, at all. I think Lukas’s words had to be ringing through Roman’s head this whole episode, when he said that if Logan was here now, he would be embarrassed (disappointed, always fucking disappointed) in what Kendall and Roman are doing with his legacy. It shows in the way that Roman aggressively tries to exert the control over his situation and his self-image, by firing people who he should be keeping close. All because he thinks that this is how his dad would behave, that this is what he would have wanted (and because everyone is seeing him as a failure, as ‘not good enough’ replacement for Logan, as a joke that he always was and always will be). There is a clear disconnect between his actions and his emotions, and everything in-between is just a dull afterimage of repressed guilt, and grief, and loss that he cannot possibly overcome. He is trying to regain power, even though he doesn’t want it, even though it was drilled into him that he can only be happy when all his control is taken away from him.
Roman does have lucid moments throughout this episode, where he realises that he pushed too far and made a mistake, but he doesn’t have the support that he needs to reel him back from the downward spiral of self-destructive power trips. Kendall is too wrapped up in his own manic sense of grandiosity, whereas Shiv attempts to keep herself from being pushed away from the business, by manipulating the situation to retain the sense of control. And Roman is left by himself in this sense of loss, where the only person who made him validated was gone forever; where he will never be able to get the same feeling of approval that only Logan was able to grant him. His sun is gone, and he is left stranded in the darkness, freezing in his own shame and self-hatred and sense of inadequacy. Roman Roy always gets it wrong.
The crucial problem is that Roman is never going to be able to comfortably emulate Logan. He is too guided by his emotions, too attached to the concepts of love and family, that the vulnerability that is an integral part of who he is, usually ends up being his downfall. His hurt feelings are always going to take the front seat, and guide his actions straight into self-destruction. In this episode, both of his attempts to imitate his dad ended with frenzied firing, and committing really two cardinal mistakes, one of them definitely bigger than the other. But most importantly, each time he did it, you could see a certain twitchiness about Roman (which was always there, like a background noise that could be easily missed if it wasn’t ringing so loudly), how his body inadvertently knows that this behaviour doesn’t fit, that it’s not really who he is, that he cannot possibly be a killer, when he spent so much of his life balancing on the edge of the knife. How his upbringing caused him to mistake abuse for love, to the point when he seeks that sense of degradation and shame as the only ways to reach fulfilment. To make him whole. Without Logan, Roman is just a landfill of shattered pieces, a puppet with his strings cut off, breaking at the seems. From episode to episode that grief for all he has lost, and for all he will never be able to get, keeps pouring out, and I don’t know how long it will be until there is nothing left to give.
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jonmartintrash · 2 years ago
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Just a reminder that ep 30 will more than likely make or break the aro arthur headcanon
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nicetomeetmew · 1 year ago
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I just watched the new Garfield trailer.
The Crisp-ratification of voice acting is terrifying.
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salted-clover · 2 years ago
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doodles
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sea-of-machines · 2 years ago
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so, finland is about to become mordor due to the elections we had, but I'm trying to keep my head up and thinking about Arjen Lucassen really helps because he's such a sweet sunshine. Also, I joined the leftist youth group today (well, sent the application today, it said that they'll contact me within a week).
Anyway, how has your week started?
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priest-exists-kinda · 2 years ago
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finally telling my mom about my chronic pain (over text because I'm a pussy) because it was so bad today that i was crying and i really hope she doesn't get mad at me
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illuminatedferret · 3 months ago
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post-canon fics where hua cheng gets amnesia'd back into wuming, who inevitably finds out His Beloved Is Married always read like the meme "I'll be his second husband." (what happened to the first?) "Nothing you can prove."
jump to xie lian, who knows exactly what mental contortions the love of his life would go to rather than recognize that xie lian loves him, deciding to humor wuming's murder fantasy for shits and giggles. 'you want to murder my husband, wuming? hm, i dont know... he is nice. except for the time he proposed to me and then immediately walked it back as a joke- oh, you'd treat me better than that? you'd never do something so cruel? well... im listening.'
cue hua cheng getting his memories back like "gege i thought we were over this. gege. gege stop laughing. gege please. i said sorry!"
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disabeetled · 10 days ago
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reminder to all my disabled lovelies that "gross" symptoms do not make you gross or lesser in any way. incontinence, vomiting, irritable bowels, or gastrointestinal issues shouldn't be as demonized as they are. you are real, valid, and loved
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deathricedrawn · 4 months ago
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i'm ready to try
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evelynpr · 4 months ago
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Congratulations My Hero Academia for providing, possibly, the biggest and longest legit straightbaiting yet in shonen history.
Bonus points that their final chapter was released on yaoi day.
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primolovebot · 2 years ago
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y’all ever just listen to someone talk, and literally feel your brain cells dying in the process?
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diamondnokouzai · 8 months ago
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if magneto knew what the internet was then he would post to r/aita as often as possible and all his posts would be the top posts of the year. thats the kind of drama hes going through. he also gets permabanned from r/mutants for advocating violence
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carehounds · 18 days ago
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Drawing them again to detox
Boy
Yarn
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Bird
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Red
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Blue/yellow
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Green
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emilyjunk · 3 months ago
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"Kevin isn't that bad it's not like he beats her, why does she need to kill him or fake her death, just get divorced" you are the point of the show, you are missing the crucial reveal. Allison sees Kevin in every single scene as she does their last scene together, but we as the audience aren't privy to that and we only see sitcom Kevin which is Kevin's self perception. He is not suddenly becoming scary and threatening to her. He was like that the whole time. We only see Allison's feelings about Kevin and the aftermath of her interactions with Kevin -- this is the ONLY time we see Kevin from her POV except for the brief initial breaking of the sitcom cam. Every other time we see Kevin on screen it's from Kevin's POV. Even after she cuts her hand we only see the bandage in her singular pov when she is away from kevin, but when it shifts back to sitcom Kevin it's gone.... We do not see the reality of her interactions with Kevin, that's the point of the show!!! Because when Kevin is on screen, it's Kevin's world! We only see Kevin from anyone else's lens in ONE scene at the end, which is when Allison decides to leave, so yes the sitcom cam "softens his abuse" but it also just fully acts as an unreliable narration because we never literally see Kevin from anyone else's POV until the series finale so every time Kevin is on screen it isn't even an accurate portrayal of what's happening, it's Kevin's perception of what's happening. Allison has viewed him like that the entire show, we as the audience just did not get to witness that POV until the end
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starheirxero · 1 month ago
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I saw this post and was immediately inspired LMAO
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