#im scared and I don’t know what to do | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

smolldust · 2 months ago

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I’m genuinely so terrified of living in the us right now. Like I don’t know what to do. I’m terrified. I want to live and stay alive but I don’t know if I’m gonna be able to survive these next four years and that scares me. I don’t know what to do

#The pit of fear that opens in my stomach when I think about this #I’m not religious but I pray something happens that makes it so trump can’t be president #Whether it’s cause he’s a convicted felon or because he was impeached twice and it happens again #Or he dies from old age or something or the evidence of him cheating in the election prevents him from being president #I don’t know man #im scared and I don’t know what to do #I don’t know if I’ll be alive four years from now and that scares me cuz I don’t wanna die #Anyways sorry for rambling/venting or whatever you wanna call this #smolldust #smolldust rambles #Vent #politics #us politics #us election #I feel stupid for being this scared because others are going through so much worse so I should prolly just shut up

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bugisbonkerz · 1 year ago

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i think it’s funny he has a tie of himself

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i-may-be-an-emu · 1 month ago

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WHAT AM I MEANT TO SAY WHEN PEOPLE ASK ABOUT MY HOBBIES LIKE OH. IM VERY OBSESSED WITH AN IMPROV GROUP FROM LONDON. YEAH WHEN I THINK ABOUT THEM I SMILE LIKE A MANIAC AND I’VE CRIED BECAUSE THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME MULTIPLE TIMES. WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES?

#like what am I meant to say when people ask me what I’ve been up to!??!! 😭😭😭 “been making lots of gay fan edits of aubergine farmers”#help #/lh #shoot from the hip #all caps #I love fandom being what I do for fun don’t get me wrong I love it SO MUCH #but like #People I know irl can be very judgemental and I’m not used to sharing it with people yk #But it’s like my only obsession right now and people I know irl are confused as to why I seemingly don’t have an obsession rn 😭😭#Because I’m scared lol #Like there’s nothing weird about it really #but idk #Anyway we stay silly :3 #I’ve shared it with people who don’t think it’s weird/already knew im weird #BUT IM TALKING ABOUT IT MORE AND ITS GOOD #anyway sorry for rambling in the tags #This is a silly /lh post lol (/gen)

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aspennntree · 3 days ago

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he’s so weird i wish men were real

redraw of a screenshot !! i’m super proud of how this turned out! really deviating from my normal art here ajdhdiahdja

#my art #tree draws #digital art #artists on tumblr #metal gear fanart #greeting mutuals. i’m not quite sure how i got here either. this is my guy now #raiden #raiden mgs #msg4 #raiden fanart #known genshin and honkai player posting the wrong raiden smh #he’s in the meiverse in my heart #raiden msg4 #msg4 raiden #msg4 fanart #metal gear solid fanart #i guess. i’m scared #this is A Deviation from my normal twink and or lesbian posting i’m sorry. i’m not immune to weird cyborg man #uh. i’m very shy.#i didn’t go as hard on the eyes as i usually do because i. couldn’t get the colors down. why are all of the screenshots so GODDAMN ORANGE #i know his eyes are blue but the colors of my screenshots kept fucking me up #anyways uh !!! art moment #please don’t eat me alive #i miss her (drawing oscar)#i could do that i dunno why im complaining #uhhhhh what else #i’m just a little guy #i’m so scared.#please don’t kill me <3

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edwinisms · 6 months ago

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#this question is very hard for me to answer so obviously I have to torment everyone else with it #cause like. like I can really see the potential in either answer. both are feasible #I will say. most realistically. to me. edwin first charles harder #because I think…..I think the reasoning behind the other way around usually tends to be about how edwin absolutely was slower to bond and #open up in general whereas charles hit the ground fucking running #but i don’t think that particularly applies to their romantic relationship #if you mean ‘fell for’ in a general sense rather than a romantic one then yes 100%#but that’s not what im talking about here #I have a few different reasons but generally I think edwin fell first because like… the way he attached himself to charles and accepted him #as his person and etc is so unlike him to do with literally anyone- especially at the point where they first met/the first years they knew #each other. charles just seems to have hit him as something very very special and irreplaceable quite quickly for him to open up the way he #did and change and flourish into a fully realized person because of how safe and worthy charles made him feel #he took to charles with an unusual amount of ease and trust and I think that says something about how charles struck his heart Early #whereas with charles… yes on one hand he did stay on the mortal plane largely because of edwin and absolutely would’ve been impacted by the #tender act of mercy that was edwin reading to him as he died so he wouldn’t be scared. that’s absolutely what got him to trust edwin and to #want to be with him and protect him and so on #but charles would still do that and be like that under intense platonic circumstances I think #but most importantly I just think charles fell harder. when he fell is less important to me here- more important is that by GOD that boy is #down so fucking bad and outright SAYS IT in so many ways that he doesn’t realize– the sheer amount he restates how he’s content so long as #he’s with edwin. how he doesn’t want to be anywhere where edwin can’t follow. would and Did go to hell and back for him. believes him #to be the kindest and most incredible person he’s ever met. prioritizes him above anything and everything. etc etc etc #that’s not to say edwin doesn’t feel a similar amount of devotion– but charles just. really loves him with his whole person. loves him as a #fact of his existence and a piece of his very soul #idk man. it just feels like he is so incredibly smitten and he doesn’t even know it.#like I said though I can see both options and give reasons for both options so this question EATS at me I GENUINELY don’t have a super #strong feeling either is absolutely correct. it’s so difficult to answer they’re both so smitten and have such a history and GRAHHHH #payneland #dead boy detectives #rambling #polls

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smhpunkacademic · 16 days ago

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deep in my heart, i just want to be good. but maybe you were right when you said i wasn’t a good person. no matter how hard i tried. no matter how often i go to therapy or take my meds and use my skills. i’m not a good person. i was hurting you, i was always hurting you and i was never really… good. even if all i wanted was to be good.

you were right when you said “your not a good person.” - i am not. and there’s no point in trying to be. so maybe it was the right decision to leave me. just as it will be the right decision for me to leave.

no matter how hard i try, i will never be good. and the earth should not worry about rotten people.

~ by your rotting Juno

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lemonlimestar · 22 days ago

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listening to live aid to heal from this stupid baka existence. now i need a cigarette

#candy cigarette i’m scared of real drugs heart emoji #i am a squareeee #+ substances in general like i don’t wanna know what ill do when im not fully in control of my body…. yk….#call me tim drake the way i(i’m taken away)#what’s bro yappin about

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sewerratzz · 1 month ago

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IM THRIVING DHMIS WEBSITE JUST DROPPED

#looks like i know what im doing with that half of my first paycheck #MERCH TIME BABEY #when i get home later. im going to work now #but LETS FUCKING GO AM I RIGHT FELLAS #im so excited dude #don’t hug me i’m scared #dhmis

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vonclosen · 4 months ago

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vent. sorry i’m honesty hangry and upset

actually i’m still annoyed. has anyone in this damn fandom heard of filtering tags. for shit. they don’t like

also like not to be ‘what about’ but seriously if your biggest problems are fucking shipping wars on tumblr dot com i envy you. truly.

#misc: personal text #also not to Make It Like That but like #a lot of the people i know who like making art about the legion and/or caecade and vulcade #are people of color as well. like do y’all not hear yourselves. asking racially marginalized people who have historically experienced #slavery/forced cultural assimilation #and a host of other issues #if they LIKE SLAVERY and APPROVE of it IN REAL LIFE #fiction can inform reality yes but truly? it is not that deep. some people like dark themes in fiction. be okay with it #i’m indigenous. much of the legion’s narrative is specifically anti-indigenous. i am *literally the product of genocide*#i still enjoy exploring stories with it. because i can choose to like things. or not like them.#some people like to explore unhealthy dynamics in fiction. that does not mean they approve of it.#and DO NOT come at me saying ‘wuh wuh wuh well that means you approve of csam and you’re a pro shipper’ or whatever the fuck people are #saying now. because that is NOT what i’m saying and it is not the same. and you damn well know that.#a piece of creative work does not have to always make you comfortable. i like exploring morally challenging narratives. i like nuance.#i like grey areas in my fiction.#does that mean i condone that irl? hell no #because i know what im about. i know my values. and they’re not necessarily reflected in my storytelling or art #personally i think that exploring horror and toxicity in fiction is a good way to build reading comprehension (once you’ve ‘built’#the thinking muscles for it).#honestly i’m just so so so so tired of this moral scare around always Liking The Right Things #and if you like the Wrong Things and Wrong Media that makes you Bad.#it’s fucking dumb #learn to filter out the shit you don’t like. you are allowed to not like things.

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selleprotection · 12 days ago

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WAIT I GOT AN IDEA WHO WANT TO ADD ME ON ROBLOX👅👅👅

#since i cant rlly give my other socials…. i think that’ll do!!!#i actually don’t know what other socials i can give out if it’s not insta or tik tok #if you use snapchat i’m really scared of you and im shivering as we speak #anyway #selleposts ⭑.ᐟ

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lunni-e · 24 days ago

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graduation was very good and im very proud of myself, but the world always knows when to make grief strike

#tw vent #tw death #venting hidden in tags #my great grandmother passed away the moment we got back to the hotel #and I feel so much guilt that I didn’t graduate in the spring instead so my family could’ve been there with her instead #and now I worry they wasted their time with me instead of her #and im scared im the reason my grandmother and great aunt might have bad blood #bc my great aunt is upset at almost everyone for not staying back with her and my great grandma #but then this is the second time a close family never passed on graduation #and I feel like im a bad omen #im gonna do my best to distract myself #but I just don’t know what to do #it’s been a few hours and I am okay now #well not really im still feeling guilt for not graduating sooner #but im #not sick and crying as much

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bugisbonkerz · 8 months ago

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what if when duck said he “always knew he deserved to be dead” he also (maybe unknowingly) meant he excepts how their world works. like we all know he loves living in that hell hole of a home and love love loves when things go orderly and as planned. and he’s ALWAYS fucking dying so he’s sorta like . “hey. if this world wants to kill me sometimes that’s okay.” duck will just randomly out of nowhere says things like he knows too much about whats going on, but he just doesn’t care bc he believes it’s normal. and if he has any awareness of this thing specifically , i don’t think he minds as long as he gets to come back. because that’s always what happens and he’s okay with that. maybe he just thinks that that place knows what’s best for him, so he deserves what he gets. even if it means making him hurt from time to time