#im p sure if we broke up my dad would want to keep her as a daughter instead of me

[lamellas]

I really love little, everyday intimacies of growing close with people and building new relationships and family networks

Like, I've been with my girlfriend for going on 3 years now. My family loves her and she's considered part of the family by now, but we have a nuclear family groupchat from ages before we started dating that we use most of the time unless it's relevant she be looped in (or its pet photos).

But right now my parents are on vacation and instead of sending their daily pics and updates to the groupchat with me and my sister, they're sending it to the groupchat with everybody. It's such a little thing, objectively; it's literally 80% pictures and commentary on context with 20% reactions, we aren't really chatting. But they still decided, casually, that she gets to see the same internal life and should be shown their trip through the same snapshots as their bio kids!

Idk something about it just. Really makes me happy. It's nice to see people you love loving and caring for each other so casually.

[deexchanel]

little girl in a box.

word count:

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x BlackFem!Reader

Warning: Swearing, mention of killing😬.

Summary: Bucky and Y/N comes home from their date to find a sweetheart in a box.

A/N: this haven't been my week so im using fanfiction to be a distraction.

Y/N and Bucky walked up the stairs to their apartment in Bucharest. They were holding hands, engaged in a conversation.

"I was thinking, what if I made shrimp alfredo?" Y/N asked as their hands sway back and forth. Bucky looked at her confused.

"What's alfredo?"

"Oh my god, you never had it before?"

"I mean in the army they boiled everything. It wasn't really lavish."

"Everything boiled sound so nasty."

"I know right but I managed. What's going to be in it?"

"Shrimp and pasta with Alfredo sauce. I think you're going to love it!"

"That's fine with me babe, as long as it isn't soup."

"Same." Y/N laughed letting go of his hand so she could unlock the door. Normally they would go through the window. But just for one night, they didn't want to be paranoid. Just to have one normal night.

Bucky stopped in his tracks staring at a medium size box that had big holes poked in it. "Y/N were you expecting something?"

"No." Y/N with hesitation getting worried that this might a setup. Bucky pulled her behind him protectively then proceeded to nudge open the box. The box top fell off and a pair of brown doe eyes stared back at them. Bucky hardened face expression soften as he saw a beautiful little girl in the box.

Whoever left this beautiful child in the box was a horrible person in general. The little girl sat up looking at the couple nervously. Bucky squat down so they could be eye level.

"Hi princess... I'm Bucky and that's my girlfriend Y/N. Would you like to tell me your name?" Bucky said softly then pointed at Y/N who waved giving a toothless smile. It was like Bucky's dad instincts kicked in as he felt the need to protect the little girl any way he could.

She shook her head as a way of saying she didn't want to talk. Her body was skinny seeming that she haven't ate in a couple of days. She looked no older then 4. Y/N squat down to help ease her nerves.

"How about we go in and get you something to eat?"

The little girl looked at Y/N scaredly and instantly held her arms out for Bucky. Y/N sigh knowing that whatever happened in this girl past, she was scared of women she didn't trust. Bucky picked her up gently not wanted to hurt her with his arm.

They walked into the apartment and Y/N quickly started to prepare dinner. Bucky sat on the bed while the little girl sat on the side of them. He tries to start conversation again with her.

"Can you tell me your name now?"

The little girl looked around before speaking softly,"Melanie.."

The pair looked at each otherin shock, he got her to talk. There wasn't any technology in the room so they best way to stay entertained was to have conversation.

"Well Melanie how old are you?" Bucky questioned.

"Five." She said but held up three fingers making Bucky smile in amusement. He helped her by raising up another finger.

"How old are you?"

Y/N giggled while fixing their bowls. Nobody have ever asked him that. Bucky laughed since its been a long time since someone asked him that.

"Well doll, I'm 106."

Melanie made a funny face turning her head to the side. Y/N came over with three bowls in her hands. Bucky grabbed the bowls passing one to Melanie, while holding the other ones as Y/N sat down so she wouldn't spill it.

"Can I eat all of it? I've been good all week." Melanie moved some of her hair from her face with a a sadden expression. Y/N felt so bad for her, this wasn't right.

"Baby you can eat all it. I can make more if you want some okay?"

"Okay." Melanie smiled digging in her food. Bucky and Y/N shared a look. He was angry that she went through horrible things at a young age.

After dinner, Bucky washed and put the dishes away while Y/N laid down on the mattress. Melanie kept picking her head up to see if Bucky was coming.

"He's coming honey, he's washing dishes."Y/N laughed softly realizing what she was doing. "You tired?"

Melanie shook her head, rubbing her eyes,"No."

"Yes you are. Come here?" Y/N asked nicely but Melanie poked out her lip. She was sitting in the middle of the mattress near Y/N's knees.

"Noo, I'm waiting on Bucky."

"Here I am princess." Bucky grunt getting on his knees behind her. Melanie looked happy as he picked her up, walking on his knees to get to this spot on the mattress. Y/N laid on her side, watching them in admiration. 

Melanie was very brave and didn't take long getting used to the couple. Food was a way to her heart so the trust came quickly. She was snuggled between Bucky and Y/N while they cuddled her enjoying their sleep.

-----------

2:48 a.m.

People smashing through the apartment windows starled them awoke. Before Bucky could reach for his gun, a man punched him in the face. Y/N quickly grabbed Melanie holding her into her chest then gets up grabbing the emergency bookbag.

The couple agreed that if this was to happen then find the best way out possible. They would find each other no matter how far away they was. Bucky did one on one combat with the man that broke in.

"GO Y/N!"

She nodded rushing to the door making sure to keep a good grip on Melanie. When she opened the door a man stood their with a gun pointed directly at her head. Melanie start to cry with all the commotion going on. Tears start to fall out of Y/N's eyes, thinking this was it.

"Go back in now or I won't hesitate putting one between your eyes." The man sneered putting the cold gun on her forehead. Y/N turned around going back into the apartment. Bucky closed his eyes trying not to lose it as he saw his family being held at gun point.  He was being held at gun point as well but he was hoping that his girls was able to get away.

"So Winter Soldier, you really thought you could get away." A man laughed turning on a light revealing his face. It was Rumlow holding Bucky at gun point and the man that held Y/N at gun point was Pierce. Bucky chest heaved up and down as he was getting angrier.

Melanie little face was turning red from how hard she was crying. Pierce rapidly pointed another gun in his other hand at Melanie's little forehead.

"NO!"Bucky jumped forward but Rumlow put the gun on his forehead making him stop. Pierce took the gun off safety pressing it harder on Melanie's forehead which makes Y/N sob harder.

"Shut the little brat up!"

"Melanie baby, stop... stop crying we're okay. Bucky's okay." Y/N lied hoping she was to stop crying. Melanie cries turns into sniffles looking at Y/N hopefully.

Y/N nod her head crying,"We're okay baby."

Bucky felt like he let his girls down. He was so angry that he wanted to kill both of them but he couldn't move. "I'll go back and do whatever. Just p-please leave my family out of this."

"That's what I wanted to hear! Cuff him!" Pierce exclaimed letting the guns drop from Y/N and Melanie. Y/N shook her head not wanting Bucky to leave and endure all the things they worked so hard for him to forget.

"Bucky no!”

"Shut it bitch!" Pierce snapped at her holding the gun to her head again making her jump. It was killing Bucky for not being able to help.

"I'm sorry Y/N. I love you." Bucky sigh putting his arms behind his back so Rumlow could cuff him. As Rumlow did, Redwing flew in dropping a disk on Pierce's forehead electrocuting him. Sending him unconscious.

Bucky ducked as Rumlow shot the gun towards him making the girls scream. Sam flew in the window taking out the extra gaurd that stood by the refrigerator. Bucky stood up swiftly so he could take out Rumlow.

He smirked aiming the gun towards the girls," I guess nobody's getting what they want." Rumlow shot the gun at the girls. Y/N used her body to shield Melanie. Bucky stared in horror as he tried to get to them but Steve's shield covered them from the bullets.

Bucky turned around angrily at Rumlow pulling out the secret gun that was in his  waist holster. With no hesitation, Bucky shoots him between the eyes. Rumlow body fell to the ground.

Y/N came from behind Steve's large frame. She walked over to Bucky and pulled him into a hug without crushing Melanie's little body. Bucky rubbed his hand through Y/N hair and kissed Melanie's forehead. They didn't have anything to say, they were just grateful to all be alive.

"I'm so sorry to ruin this moment guys but we need to go. Their supposed to be bringing in reinforcements any second." Steve said placing his shield on his back.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. bring the jet back around." Sam pressed his finger on the com.

--------------------

On the jet, it was quiet but peaceful time for them to rejuvenate. Bucky couldn't sleep so he watched over his girls who were sleeping.

Melanie slept on his chest with his metal arm holding her up so her face could implant into his neck. Y/N was cuddled up with his arm wrapped around her. He kissed their foreheads every other second for his comfort.

"Thank you guys." Bucky said to Sam and Steve who were sitting in the in the front seats of quinjet.

"Just gald you guys are safe." Steve pat his hand on Bucky's shoulder.

"Plus we were able to kill two birds with one stone. Bonus but glad we could help."Sam said making Bucky smiled. He looked at his girls, very content with life.

------------

horrible writing.

I wrote this bout a year ago. I don't like it, but i just needed it as a distraction.

stay slutty my friends

[fallindomino]

how i would have changed s2 of hsmtmts

obvious disclaimer but im not a screenwriter or anyth so im not claiming what i want is best, this is just for fun lololol

okay so first of all nini would still have dropped out of yac but she wouldn’t have gone back to east, she would have transferred to north bc she was too ashamed to tell anyone she left at first and maybe she still wants to explore who she is away from ricky and the others

nini could join north’s batb and this way maybe we could have some playful rivalry with lily and nini and more scenes with antoine shdhdjdj also it could have been a great opportunity to flesh out lily’s character so those scenes where she reaches out to ricky and her confession at the end of the season actually make sense lol

speaking of ricky ,,, i think he should have left the play at some point hear me out. he only joined in the first place because of nini and barely wanted to do it at all once he realized he wasn’t gonna be able to perform with her. he could have joined crew and been a manager with natalie or smth considering he rlly does see the theater gang as a second family. also this would leave so much room for ej and ricky development and bants since ej joined the av club and began to pursue film. they could have some convos where idk ricky asks ej how he figured out what he wanted to do after duke didn’t work out and ricky could actually develop some interests that arent the play or nini ,,, maybe fucking art club i mean he did p good on that centerpiece for carlos’ quinceañera.

with ricky not being the beast anymore i think seb should take his place that would be soooo good. and since seb isn’t chip anymore carlos won’t make those snide comments about chip being a small unimportant role and we can just cut that whole fight bc it was dumb and bad. we could still have seb being insecure that carlos is only dating him bc there aren’t really any other gay guys at school. in a heartbeat is great and i did like ricky being supportive in the background it was kinda funny too idk dhdjdjfj

ooh i almost forgot abt rini ahshdj okay so i still think they should break up. but in my version there’s no ricky pulling an ej 1.0 and deleting comments off of nini’s insta, cause with ricky in art club and nini at north trying to figure out what she wants i think one of them would realize that they’re going in different directions and only got back tgt because they made each other feel safe cause what they had was familiar. this could be triggered by ricky mentioning smth abt nini at yac and then nini breaks down and tells him that she dropped out and is at north and doesn’t know where she’s going. and then they can both realize they aren’t good for each other rn and have a less tragic mutual break up.

honestly i really liked the scene of nini taking charge after miss jenn freaked out cause with the character detail of nini giving every person in the cast of productions she’s in a thank you note she just seems really like someone who is suited to lifting others up. this could still be explored at north, maybe she could help lily through her issues that were briefly implied in ep 11 and nini realizes she wants to be a drama teacher and encourage kids to go off book and put themselves into their acting, something she couldn’t have at yac.

okay now ej ,,, so like i said in ricky’s section, more bants between them cause i feel like friendships kinda fell by the wayside due to all the relationships so more friendship !!!! also the scene where ej tells his dad he’s not going to duke shouldn’t have been an ending scene, it should have been fleshed out with his dad pushing back saying how he pulled all these strings to get him in and ej saying he doesn’t wanna go if his own hard work couldn’t get him there. and also more scenes of ej doing av club things !!! and realizing he rlly likes film and wants to do it OMG IT WOULD BE SO COOL IF HE BROKE THE FOURTH WALL AND ASKED THE DOCUMENTARY CREW ABT THE FILM INDUSTRY god i would love that. the only scene we rlly got of ej doing film things was at the quinceañera which made me kinda sad. uhhh also i just wanted to specifically mention how ej got mr mazzara that job at cal tech bc it really showed how he wanted to be there for people not just for gina, who he had a crush on, but for mr mazzara who supported him outside of romance, so i wanna keep that for sure.

gina !!! okay so i mostly liked her arc in this season, the only changes i would make would be to flesh it out a teeny bit (god this hypothetical s2 would have to be like 22 eps at least shdjdjdjfj) anyways besides ashlyn singing home to get gina to stay i think there should be a scene where they actually talk in her room abt how gina feels safer when shes on the run (second chance reference ilysm) hhhh and also a scene of her and carlos actually working out compromises for their choreo cause i liked that bit of development too and fleshing that out would make gina an even better foil for lily, who felt a need to hog the spotlight like gina used to. with gina’s own arc fleshed out her character would feel more whole independently from romance and portwell would be even more rewarding than it is in the current s2. the only thing i would really change abt portwell is that they would kiss !!! in the finale but thats bc im biased.

ashlyn should have gotten a more fleshed out storyline about being insecure about not being a good enough belle or the typical belle. there were some throwaway lines when north did their typical dramatics but the only two real scenes that showed it were when ash talked to big red about it and when she was telling nini she wanted to do a run in “home” bc lily did it. ashlyn should get more screen time where she has to grapple with the reasons she doesn’t feel good enough and big red can still support her but also gina too bc i would like more roommate besties interaction.

kourtney could still date howie, that harry potter shit was cute but there needs to be smth else for kourtney’s arc. idk she’s still into fashion so maybe she could be out here trying to create her own line or smth? this doesn’t have to be resolved in s2 like making a wholeass line takes time and she could work on it into a potential s3. kourtney just didnt get much outside of howie and the stuff at the beginning of the season where she said nini inspired her to be independent and that's why she got a job was just dropped?? so i think that fashion could fill that for her if she’s still dating howie cause like having her whole arc just be the pizza place kinda overlaps w big red’s mini arc abt how he wasn’t settling for hospitality, its what he wants to do with his life.

ik what ur thinking. anna, even if you added more episodes, where would u find the room to add all these plotlines?? well first we cut (most of) the seblos fight, so thats some time saved. honestly most of the time that we r going to gain is going to be from cutting ms jenn’s time. things like ms jenn’s and nini’s car ride would get cut, but mostly all of ms jenn’s romances would get cut down. considering she’s the teacher and isn’t actually a character with an arc how does she have THREE love interests this season?? like all of the weird tension between her and zack can be cut, like just some short scenes of them being competitive can stay. all of the stuff with ricky’s dad can go bye bye we don’t need it. i did like her w mr mazzara so most of that can stay i just didn’t like how he said he would give up cal tech for her, ew no that would be gone.

the MENKIES !!!! this is the last thing im gonna address cause in a perfect world every character would get a long fleshed out arc but then the season would be waaay too long and also im mostly trying to work within material the show gave so this is mostly made up of “realistic” deviations from what actually happened. lol idk what that even means it just makes sense to me. but anyways!! uhhh bro idk i thought them dropping the menkies was funny but it also made the finale really BAD lmao. in this finale, seb is the beast, east still had to deal w the fact that they’re underfunded compared to north but no one is injured, lily is less of a poorly written character and maybe ppl are even rooting for her, and wow i just realized i never actually said what role i think nini should have in north’s show. OOH she could be student director instead of lily cause lily both being in the play while also directing was weird considering omg i just checked and according to her wiki page shes a FRESHMAN?? and they let her be student director? lol hell nah. okay so with all that in mind ,,, the menkies should have been the season cliffhanger instead of portwell. east and north should both be nominated, both schools perform at the menkies, and then the award winner is about to be announced and THATS when it cuts to natalie and the end of the season.

one, this actually gives more tension for a summer s3 as we would be waiting to see the consequences of whichever school won. also i bet people would be wondering if nini’s gonna be transferring back to east or staying at north. people would also prob wonder if ej would be getting the scholarship if east won and what that would mean for his interest in film.

lmao that got longggg and idk if anyone’s even gonna read this but it was fun to do :D

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

[uwumessenger]

random headcanons i have for each om! character teehee

hi it's been a while since ive posted some hcs bc uni has been kicking my a$$! luckily i only have a few papers to tidy up and im done. here r some hcs for each obey me character that ive accumulated over the past few months wink wonk

most are random but some constants you'll find are what i think they smell like, languages they can speak (other than their native (demon/angel) and eng/jp), and music tastes !

lucifer

i have a strong feeling that he showers twice a day: in the morning after waking up and at night before going to bed

his cologne is probably the type that will last in an elevator for like a week after he uses it once. i dont think this mf ever smells like anything other than his cologne

has a secret folder on his phone of semi-nudes and other scandalous pics from when he felt sexy at the time omg

aside from demon language/eng/jp he can speak french and knows latin

listens to classical stuff yea but he also listens to diavolos mixtapes (re: diavolo's section)

not a fan of sweets but will eat sweet things when craving

really bland sense of humor...borderline cringey 😭✋🏻

mammon

has gone to google images and searched for "inspirational quotes tumblr" "gold aesthetic tumblr" & "relatable crush post tumblr" then reposts it onto his socials or just taps thru them and giggles bc he relates

his cologne doesnt last as long as lucifers and probably smells common. he has to reapply a lot but it's a people pleasing smell. it's cheaper hence the constant reapplying

he probably does have an expensive bottle but is the type to totally overspray...eek

he is canonically a car guy 🥲 and probably tells the one in his room good morning & good night + kisses the hood every once in a while. has tons of car magazines

he doesnt really speak other languages but has attempted to learn spanish before

listens to whatever is on the radio. doesnt rly stan anyone but he eventually will listen to mc's playlist and mc's playlist ONLY

levi

lurks on mc's socials ALL THE TIMEEEE like he will rewatch ur stories and scroll thru ur feed and overanalyze ur tweets/rts or blog posts. if ur mc isnt the type to use sns much he still googles ur name all the damn time just to find any sites u might be on fjdjdjdjskks

probably streams on whatever youtube or twitch devildom site equivalent there is, but only has like 40 or so followers. which he is okay with!

until he sees someone else who gets more attention than him. then the envy starts kicking in bad. especially if they suck 🧍🏻‍♀️

classic gamer boy smell. you know, sweat, tears, must, and (sometimes) axe deodorant. lucifer has to do a scent check before he goes out to any event & lets him use his cologne. how sweet!

kpop stan!! more girl groups than anything and his ults are probably GIRLS GENERATION, wonder girls, twice, loona, & red velvet

cried when ioi disbanded and refused to leave his room. the only thing u could hear was downpour on loop at full blast

can also speak korean & communicate in echolocation like dolphins 😏

satan

listens to country music you cant change my mind

smells like whatever environment he is in. he doesnt really have a designated smell just throws some deodorant on and goes about his day.

he's sooooo bad at driving...gets road rage way too often so his license has been REVOKED

but hes totally a backseat driver. needs to be sedated on long trips

do not let him watch finding nemo when luke asks to watch it. it's not worth it. he will cause mass destruction.

if he was a human or lived long term in the human world he totally has the ability to be a doctor

is studying as many languages as possible, but he mostly knows latin & french & german etc etc. wants to learn all the dead languages out of curiousity

asmo

dont think this mf has ever held down a relationship. ever

he doesnt compromise much & is not willing to change his lifestyle to fit an s/o into it. you keep up with how he lives or it just isnt meant to be (but dont worry! he'll eventually learn...maybe,,,,)

has the hardest time out of everyone when it comes to breaking bad habits

his smell varies bc he uses a variety of perfumes (whatever is the most popular at the time) but he probably sticks to floral and fresh scents. he never uses generic people pleaser scents like mammon

listens to electropop, mainstream pop, & some alternative rock

as for languages he too knows french, spanish, italian, etc. in general, if it's a romance language he knows it!

opposite of lucifer in the sense where he loves sweets and will refrain from eating too many bitter things

i think we all know that asmo is the biggest rockstar of the group! he's probably been in a boy band at least once, but now he makes his own music

has tried to teach mammon how to sing once. ended up in a broken piano and bleeding ears...

beel

i feel like he is SO SHY

like unless ur close to him he will not start conversations or anything

i think he listens to r&b a lot ! and jazz 😎 maybe rock as well

smells like ur typical athlete with undertones of wet wipes. he carries them around bc he likes to clean his hands before he eats & is prepared for when theres no sink nearby

he can drive and he drives really well. no rough turns, parallel parks perfectly, and never has problems with merging

driving with beel is probably really soothing. left hand is steering the other is gripping ur thigh 😫

dont think hes really fluent in any other language but hes probably semi fluent in korean because levi wanted beel to help him out

definitely know how to order food in practically every language tho HAHAHA

belphie

he reminds me of randall from monsters inc

smells kinda musty IM SORRY but not the way levi does hes more like the kind of musty u feel or smell when it's a shitty morning

but that's only because hes so lazy, when he cleans up hes like satan

has definitely murdered multiple people before. mc is not the first 😐✋🏻

with that being said belphie has been put into prison at least twice when visiting the human world, the mf had such a strong hatred for humans theres no way he never got into trouble before

lucifer probably broke him out and they used the pen thingies from men in black to erase everyones memory of that 🙄

dont think he listens to anything other than music that'll put him to sleep. really likes lazy song by bruno mars but thinks that bruno mars put too much effort into the song. should have been one acapella verse and then finish

similar to beel hes only semi fluent in one language, probably french bc of lucifer. doesnt remember much but knows a couple of lullabies and bedtime stories

the sandman used to be his bff until they drifted. they do, however, like and comment on each other's sns posts.

diavolo

once he found out who nicki minaj was he became her #1 stan

def an ariana grande stan too 😌

choreographs dances when hes stressed...idk just seems like a diavolo thing to do

also makes rly bad soundcloud rap music sometimes. turns to poetry when hes feeling emo but only lucifer knows this. barbatos is suspicious of him but doesnt have enough evidence to confirm.

his dad is like hudson abadeer from adventure time aka marceline's dad? something must have influenced him to want to unite the 3 realms + he would need the approval to do so, so his dad must be more chill than all the others before him 🧍🏻‍♀️ IDK ok anyway

currently going through his hamilton phase bc of mc. whether mc's intent was to get him hooked onto it or just to explain it bc of something he saw online, he tells everyone that he found out abt it bc of mc!

this man cannot drive his skills are only second to jumin han

not too fond of many languages but knows the widely spoken ones like spanish, mandarin, etc. if it's taught in high school he knows it

smells like a las vegas casino. not sure why but i feel like he does. but there's also an interesting & nice smell to him if he embraces you. it's a smell you cant quite identify. but it smells nostalgic, it's mysterious, and it's tempting.

barbatos

very calm demeanor but underneath hes WILD hes probably done everything at least once oof

he just has a lot of control and stability over himself (must be nice!)

on a more angsty note i feel like he might have had his heartbroken sO BAD IDK he is hurting and maybe that's why hes so willing to obey diavolo and not abuse his time lord power thingies bc he learned his lesson the hard way

mans is so smart he knows every language you could switch languages mid conversation with him and he wouldnt be thrown off. he'd probably start speaking it too.

BUT HE SPEAKS VIET P E R F E C T L Y

listens to the same stuff as lucifer but also likes eminem. likes the movie 8 mile but criticized it heavily

have you ever been to a chinese herb shop? naturally, he smells like that. his room probably smells like it too. he doesnt really have a significant smell like some of the others

when he bakes he smells like whatever hes baking tho

one of the few out of everyone listed to have been able to travel to literally everywhere

solomon

was probably on kitchen nightmares once, but only to get feedback from chef gordon ramsay. then he used his magic to prevent the episode from airing...

was in an orchestra, one of the best times of his life. played the violin. asmo watched him in the audience once, but didnt approach him until well after that performance.

he CANNOT sing. he can, however, rap.

doesnt listen to music. he listens to podcasts! but every now and then he turns on background music, but prefers it to be instrumental stuff

never wears sunglasses. also does not have a driver's license. cannot drive a regular car. could maybe fly an airplane.

due to his immortality he has learned almost every language to exist, but finds himself speaking mandarin the most. knows most dialects too

similar smell to barbatos but u can also smell some sunscreen on him too. like, generic beach day suncreen

he has a lot of pact marks, so he once had the idea to match foundation to his skin. it took him two weeks but he eventually perfected a combination. yes he will help u find ur perfect shade if u ask him to

simeon

another country music man. has also made a tiktok or two to that one song that goes "he cant even bait a hook." they are private tho

angel country music exists and simeon invented it

if he visits the human world and wears more causal clothing he probably tucks his shirt into his pants

wears a speedo at the beach i tell u, speedo at the beach

he can speak german...i can feel it

uses his pointer finger to type and holds the phone like 2 inches away from his face so sometimes his nose will push a key hence all his typos

has no signature smell. he simply smells like your favorite scent all the time. if multiple people are around him at once, everyone smells a different smell. it's pretty rad

"what does he smell like to himself?" u may be asking. hmm...a church? 💀

luke

his first pet was a goldfish and a few months before the exchange program happened, he was given a koi pond!

secretly likes hanging out with levi sometimes just to play with henry. makes him miss his pet fish back home

so his favorite movie is probably finding nemo and he threw a fit when nemo touched the butt

luke is probably learning german bc of simeon, though he'd like to learn more of the dead languages just for fun

i dont think he listens to music often or has any preferences, he just listens to whatever is playing on the radio

but he finds himself listening to the music mc listens to

smells like freshly baked goods all the time. or fresh laundry. but like, not combined. just depends on the day

[ifistoptherain]

Star Crossed Lovers, a TsukkiYama fanfic

You can buy me a ko-fi here. You can read this on AO3 here.

Yamaguchi gets approached by Johzenji's captain, Terushima Yuuji to go on a date and Tsukishima Kei gets jealous. It looks like two alphas have their sight on Yamaguchi, how will he choose?

--

Karasuno wins against Johzenji. The adrenaline and happiness surging through Tadashi’s body is incredible. They can keep playing! It’s smiles all around as Daichi yells at them to line up and they all bow.

Playing against Johzenji was fun. The energy that that team brought to the game was wild and unpredictable, different from the other teams that would strategize every move. As usual, Hinata had the most fun, his happy pheromones flooding the court with the scent of oranges.

He’s packing up his things, with Tsukki right next to him when the Johzenji captain approaches. 

“Pinch server-kun, will you go out with me?”

He’s stunned. He can feel the blush creeping up his cheeks. Nothing has happened with Tsukki since their presentation and he’s tired of waiting. Maybe a bit of jealousy would be the exact push Tsukki needs.

He nods, holding out his phone to get his number. Terushima grins and walks away. And if Tadashi was to be honest, he’d been wondering how a tongue piercing tastes throughout the match. (Tadashi was really glad he always wears scent blockers, no way he’d be able to explain why his pheromones were horny. Actually, he could. Terushima was totally his type and it didn’t look like he was looking for anything too serious.)

He looks down at his phone. “Terushima Yuuji.” Yuuji? It means playful child, how fitting. He smiles at his phone and adds a heart emoji to his name. His heart is fluttering right now.

“So you’re going to go out with him?” Tsukki asks, expression unreadable. 

“Yup, why are you jealous?” Tsukki shakes his head, muttering something about being careful.

“He seems nice, and I like how he smells.” For someone so wild, Terushima smells like vanilla. How ironic. 

Just then, Yachi yells at them and they head to their bus. He’s honestly really tired, a quick nap is just what he needs.

When he gets home, his mother immediately wrinkles her nose. “Why did Tsukishima scent mark you so aggressively?”  

Tadashi shakes his head. “I have no idea, but today an alpha from another school asked me out, mom. I said yes!”

“Eh, I thought Tsukishima was courting you. You always smell like him. Are you sure you want to go out with someone else?”

“That’s what I thought too. I like him but he hasn’t initiated anything. I’m tired of waiting. Maybe a little jealousy will work?”

His mother punches him in the arm, “That’s seriously sly. Who taught you this behavior?”

“Like mother, like son.”

“Hey, I’m an innocent person! I bet you picked it up from your beloved Tsukki.”

“Moooommm.”

“Fine, fine, tell me all about this new alpha.”

“His name is Terushima Yuuji and he’s from Johzenji…”

--

When he checks his phone that night, there are no texts from Tsukki which was weird. So, instead he decides to text Terushima. He takes a selfie with his tongue sticking out, captioning “I wonder what a tongue piercing tastes like?” A bit flirty but Tadashi has been wondering.

He gets an immediate reply. Good, Tadashi likes attention. “Why don’t you find out this weekend?”

<b> Tadashi: </b> can i call you teru

<b> teruteru <3: </b> Only if i can call u dashi

<b> Tadashi: </b> then i should be calling you yuuji ◕ ◡ ◕

<b> teruteru <3: </b> You can if you want

<b> teruteru <3: </b> Who was the blond alpha? Would have burnt me to crisp with his glare D:

<b> Tadashi: </b> hes just my best friend

<b> teruteru <3: </b> You like him?

Tadashi pauses, unsure how to reply, admitting his feelings for Tsukki would ruin his chances with Terushima.

<b> teruteru <3: </b> Well im not looking for anyth serious anw

<b> teruteru <3: </b> I broke up with my ex a while back, we can be each others’ rebounds

<b> teruteru <3: </b>  In fact riling up an alpha seems especially fun

<b> Tadashi: </b>  u wanna watch a movie this sun?

<b> teruteru <3: </b> Sureeeee

<b> Tadashi: </b> ure definitely okay with dating for fun?

<b> teruteru <3: </b>  Yupppp

<b> Tadashi: </b> by the way

<b> Tadashi: </b> ill be preheat then so :p

<b> teruteru <3: </b> fuckkkkkkkkk

It’s Thursday so Tadashi only has three days till his date.

They’re having lunch in class when he tells Tsukki that he’s meeting Teru on Saturday, only for him to get no reaction. Tsukki passes him his lunchbox. Tadashi’s mother is a single mother and she’s usually too busy to cook for Tadashi. Tadashi tries to cook when he can but most of the time he’s too tired from working part time at Shimada Mart and the Yamaguchi family ends up eating take out. 

Stupid Tsukishima. If he didn’t like Tadashi, why would he constantly scent mark him and bring him a lunch box all the time? Honestly, Tadashi could ask Tsukki out. But, he knows Tsukki might say yes even if he didn’t have feelings for Tadashi, and Tadashi could just be overthinking Tsukki’s actions.

So, Tadashi wasn’t going to make the first move but he wasn’t going to wait forever either. He loves Tsukki but he knows that he deserves better than that.

The food is great. His lunches with Tsukki are the rare home cooked meals he gets. Curry rice always reminds him of his dad. But the sweet Japanese curries are different from the ones his dad used to make. Maybe, he should make something that his dad used to make. It’s hard to get Indian spices in Japan…

He really must drop by and thank Tsukki’s mum soon. Maybe with a gift?

“Hey Tsukki, should I get your mother a gift? She’s always helping me and my mum out. I feel bad.”

“No, it’s fine. But she did mention that she wanted to see you soon.”

“I’ll come by for dinner soon then.”

“You seemed sad?” He hadn’t even realised he had looked sad.

“I was just reminded of my dad. Thought I should make some of the food he used to make, maybe I’ll make some for mum.” His dad passed away a year ago. They’re okay with it now. Both his mum and him were able to brace themselves as he was sick for a while. 

But, sometimes it hurts. Like someone twisted a knife in his heart. 

Tadashi smiles. “It’s not a big deal, Tsukki.” It really isn't.  Grief demands to be felt and there’s nothing you can do about it. It just makes him appreciate his time with his dad more.

“Is Aki-nii coming back this weekend? I think he mentioned something like that a while back.”

And immediately, Tsukki looks annoyed. “How does he have the time to text you and not me? I’m his brother.”

“Well, Tsukki. I’m the favourite, besides you ignore him all the time. Now, if I were to tell Aki-nii what you just said, he might text you more often.” He points his chopsticks in Tsukki’s direction.

“Shut up, Yamaguchi.”

“Sorry, Tsukki.” He looks pointedly at him. “But… If you were more vocal in your affection, Aki-nii would reciprocate.” Tsukki better take the hint. Or maybe not, he would enjoy his date with Teru after all.

“By the way, I won’t be in school next week. Take notes for me, will you?” He can see the cogs turning in Tsukki’s brain.

“You’re going to be spending your pre-heat with Terushima? Just be safe.” Ugh. Tadashi could bang his head on the table. Will Tsukki ever get it?

“I will.”

“What do you think I should wear for the date? I was thinking something punk, Teru has those vibes. He might like it.”

--

Terushima picks him up, looking as punk as he could imagine, with a motorbike. Terushima looks great, the pants are tight, showing off his toned legs and bubble butt. The white tank top shows off his muscular arms through the sheer black top.

And Tadashi is really glad he went through his mother’s closet and picked out a leather jacket with spikes on it and borrowed Yachi’s choker. He’s wearing a t-shirt that he owns and skinny jeans. 

“Terushima! You look good.”

“I thought you were going to call me Yuuji. And you look good too.” He holds out a helmet for Tadashi to wear. 

“Only if you call me Tadashi.”

“Okay, Tadashi, hop on.”

Yuuji clearly has a need for speed. Tadashi thinks it's a ploy to get him to hold onto the alpha’s waist tightly. It works.

The wind also blows Yuuji’s pheromones right into his face. It’s a bit intoxicating, he hasn’t been in such close parameters with an alpha before.

Yuuji pays for everything, of course Tadashi offers to pay but it's an empty offer. There is nothing sexier than a capable alpha, it makes him feel like he would be well taken care of.

The movie bores Tadashi out of his mind so he leans into Yuuji. Nuzzles his face into Yuuji’s scent glands. He likes how Yuuji smells. He smells so sweet, a bit sugary like Tadashi could eat the alpha up. It’s a fun thought.

His preheat was making him just a bit more horny than usual. After a few minutes of nuzzling, Yuuji looks him in the eye. 

“You smell spicy, it’s rare.”  Yuuji sucks at the skin of his neck.

“I’m half indian.” Tadashi is pretty sure what someone smells like depends on the food they ate as a child. Huh, maybe Yuuji ate a lot of vanilla ice cream as a child.

He bites the sensitive skin of Tadashi’s scent glands, sucking on it and Tadashi can’t suppress the moan.

“Be quiet, <i>omega</i>.” Tadashi knows that Yuuji knows that the two of them are probably the only two left in the movie theatre.

“Make me, <i>alpha<i>.” Yuuji’s eyes almost seem to glow as he immediately closes the gap between their lips. He pushes Tadashi onto his back, who promptly wraps his legs around the alpha’s waist. His lips are rough, a bit dry. He tastes like the cheap, buttery popcorn they had earlier. Tadashi’s tongue runs along Yuuji’s tongue piercing, it doesn’t taste like anything really.

His hands are on Tadashi’s back, but one is creeping up his shirt. They stop making out for a moment and Tadashi takes off Yuuji’s shirt. Meanwhile, Yuuji pushes up Tadashi’s shirt, tongue dragging along his chest, sucking on the nipples. The metal feels cool against his skin.

Meanwhile, Tadashi feels up Yuuji’s muscular arms. He’s so strong...

“Fuck, you smell so fuckable.” He’s back to nosing at his scent glands and sucking on that skin. Tadashi lifts his hips up, gyrating against Yuuji’s crotch. They’re both hard, Tadashi notices with satisfaction.

Yuuji stops for a moment and Tadashi whines. 

“Your heat’s starting soon, let’s leave.” Ugh. It would only start tomorrow so why couldn’t he enjoy his time with Yuuji?

“Yuuji, I don’t want to…” He leans away, getting up. Deep down, Tadashi knows he’s right. He pulls Tadashi up by the arm.

Yuuji leads them out and Tadashi follows, clinging onto his arm. Tadashi does feel slightly light headed now that he thinks about it. Yuuji is awfully quiet and Tadashi’s pretty sure they’re speeding. It must take a lot of focus to deny an omega almost in heat. At least, wrapping his arms around Yuuji is nice.

When they arrive, Yuuji pushes his shirt into Tadashi’s arms. 

“For your heat.” Tadashi plants a very chaste kiss on Yuuji’s lips.

“Thanks for today, Yuuji.”

He hears the motorcycle rev off, once he’s closed the door behind him. He’s sweet and respectful, isn’t he?

“I’m home!” He says to no one in particular, his mum must have picked up an extra shift at the bar again.

He’s alone again. Yuuji just left and he misses him terribly. There’s probably an hour left until his heat actually hits.

<b> Tadashi: </b> thanks for today

<b> Tadashi: </b> drive safe

<b> teruteru <3: </b> :D

He had already built his nest and stocked his room with water in advance. Or maybe his mum had put the water bottles in? He doesn’t remember.

<b> Tadashi: </b>tsukkkiiiiiii 

<b> Tadashi: </b> he has a motorcycle! a motorcycle!!

 <b> Tadashi: </b> the movie we watched was super boring but

<b> Tadashi: </b> yuuji was really sweet i think i could fall for him

<b> Tadashi: </b> but hes not looking for anyth too serious

The messages show up as read but Tsukki doesn’t reply because when does he ever. There’s a meal in the fridge, some take out his mum probably got from work. He climbs into his nest on his bed, after dinner. AC on blast, heats could get so hot and so sticky.

During his heat, Tadashi imagines not just Tsukki’s long fingers but also Yuuji’s firm but gentle touches and his playful bites.

It’s Thursday afternoon and Tadashi’s heat is mostly gone. It’s just a dull ache in his bones now. Yuuji’s poor sheer shirt has been desecrated. Tadashi handwashes it, and then sends a pic of him wearing it with nothing below to Yuuji. Also, Yuuji’s hickies hadn’t faded in the 4 days since then.

<b> Tadashi: </b> (*^^*) the hickies still havent fadedddd

<b> teruteru <3: </b> I like to show off my work~ 

<b> teruteru <3: </b> Besides, I didn’t hear complaints at the time~~

<b> Tadashi: </b> (*^^*) 

He definitely had been in pre heat then because he hadn’t noticed how aggressive Yuuji was. The hickeys hurt if he touches them. Yuuji’s aggressiveness was sexy actually.

He’ll probably have to put makeup on them when he goes to school. But it's only Thursday and he’d probably ditch on Friday anyway so hopefully, it would fade before next Monday. 

Tomorrow, he has a morning shift at the convenient store nearby and then an afternoon shift at Shimada mart. 

<b> tsukki <3: </b> is ur heat over?

<b> Tadashi: </b> mostly but ill be working tmro, keep taking notes tsukki!

He’s been leeching on Tsukki a lot actually, from notes to food.

<b> Tadashi: </b> u wanna practise volleyball with me tmro? ill teach u the jump float serve

<b> teruteru <3: </b>  YESSSS

He takes the rare opportunity to cook himself and his mum a meal. She usually leaves in the late afternoon for work and arrives in the wee hours of the morning. But the upside to those working hours was that Tadashi got to spend time with her during the day. If she had the typical working hours, the both of them would be too tired to talk.

He just makes omelette rice. It’s simple and he’s still worn out from his heat. After dinner, he studies the school work he had missed. He knows Yuuji isn’t looking for a serious relationship but he can’t get past the what if. But he knows that's unfair to Yuuji since he still likes Tsukki. Tsukki with his golden hair and golden eyes and kind words reserved only for Tadashi, makes him feel special. They’ve been friends for years, Tsukki knows him like the back of his hand. It’s comfortable and he knows Tsukki will always be there for him but with Yuuji it’s different. It’s new and exciting and so great to finally be with someone who would do something about their feelings instead of just having Tadashi on the hook. But, part of him can’t shake the fact that somehow, deep inside him, he feels like he’s cheating on Tsukki. It’s ridiculous, really. 

He’s just lucky his omega hadn’t decided that Tsukki was his alpha. Then, he would have been in a world of suffering by constantly pining. Actually, Tadashi does pine. He just knows he deserves better than that. In fact, he thinks his omega likes Yuuji more. That whore. Why else would his heat start early?

(He knows he’s calling himself a whore, shut up.)

The next day, work goes by slowly. So few people come in so Tadashi gets to play on his phone and text Yachi. He knows, knows, that Yachi has been dying to hear about his date. The only reason she hadn’t called was because she thought he was still in his heat. He calls her during lunch. He tells her all about how he’d been so respectful despite his heat starting early. Respectful alphas were so hard to come by. God. Yachi gushes how if he doesn’t end up being with Yuuji, he better give Yachi, Yuuji’s number. Pffttt. He’s excited to see Yuuji later. 

His shift finally finishes, and he heads home to change into a t-shirt and gym shorts before meeting Yuuji. He’s in and out before he knows it. When he gets to the court, Yuuji is already there. Wearing a tank top again. Show off, he knows he looks good in tank tops doesn’t he?

“Yuuji.”

“Dashi.” He smiles, the instant he looks at Tadashi. He’s so cute. They play one on one volleyball for a while before he teaches Yuuji how to do the jump float serve. 

By the time they're done, Tadashi is soaked in sweat. They are sitting next to each other, taking sips of water and Yuuji just seems to glisten under the yellow street lights. 

“You know, I never did thank you properly the other day.” Yuuji’s eyebrows quirk upwards, smiles growing wider.

“Oh? How would you like to thank me?” He brings his face closer to Tadashi’s.

“Why don’t you come back to my place and find out?” He whispers into Yuuji’s ear. Immediately  Yuuji takes the opportunity to bite his neck. What was with him and Tadashi’s neck?

“Not here, Yuu-” He licks Tadashi’s scent glands before stopping.

They get up and Yuuji looks like the cat that got the cream.

They get on his bike and Tadashi manages to persuade him to forego the helmet. His place is only a few minutes away anyway.

He loves how the wind runs through his hair and he loves how he gets to hold Yuuji, basically feeling him up. He hooks his head on the side of Yuuji’s neck, getting a full blast of Yuuji’s pheromones. It’s heady and lustful, he’s clearly horny. Though Tadashi doubts he himself smells any different.

They get there in record time. Tadashi doesn’t know how they make it up to his room.

Yuuji is aggressive as usual but Tadashi stops him.

“It’s my treat, Yuuji. You can just enjoy.”  Yuuji sits on the edge of his bed and Tadashi unzips his pants, pulling off his boxers. He begins by licking the dick from the base to the tip, taking his time to go slow, just to tease Yuuji. He then licks the tip repeatedly and hears Yuuji groan.

“Faster,” He moans. His hand grabs onto Tadashi’s hair, pushing his head forward. Tadashi swallows his dick whole. Head bobbing as Yuuji pants. Precum begins dripping from it and Tadashi laps it up, tongue swirling around the dick.

“No... you don’t have to,” Yuuji breathes out. Tadashi ignores him, moving faster and swallowing the cum when Yuuji comes. 

Yuuji looks at him through hooded eyes and says, “Now it’s my turn to treat you.” He picks up Tadashi from the floor, placing him on the bed. And as usual, he begins by biting at Tadashi’s neck who was beginning to think that the alpha had a thing for Tadashi’s neck. Frickin’ vampire.

He begins to unzip Tadashi’s pants and he has the realisation that he doesn’t want this, not yet anyway. 

“No, Yuuji, stop.” And immediately, Yuuji stops and lets Tadashi sit up.

“I’m sorry, I thought I wanted it but I don't. Not yet, anyway.” He plays with his hands not looking directly at Yuuji.

“You don’t have to apologise, as long as we are both comfortable. You wanna cuddle?”

And that’s how Tadashi ends up in Yuuji’s arms, although he’s taller and once again, Yuuji is nosing at Tadashi’s neck.

“What’s with you and my neck? You’re like a vampire.” 

“I just love how you smell, it’s sexy. You mind if I scentmark you? ” 

“No, go ahead.” And, Yuuji rubs his scent glands all over his neck and head and face. Possessive much?

“I know we said we won’t get too serious but I like you and I don’t want other alphas after you.”

“I like you too, Yuuji. Besides, there’s no one after plain old me.”

“What about blondie, you still like him, don’t you?” Tadashi stiffens.

“Yea maybe but I’m here with you not him, that counts for something right?” He hears Yuuji sigh, he feels sorry. He hasn’t completely moved on from Tsukki. Not yet, anyway.

“You wanna stay the night? It’s too dark for you to be driving out there… But you might have to deal with my mum in the morning.”

“I’ll stay, I get to hold a pretty thing all night anyway.”

When Tadashi wakes up the next morning, Yuuji isn’t in bed. But then, he hears laughter coming from downstairs. No, this is bad.

When he walks down after washing up, both Yuuji and his mom are laughing together.

“Mommmmm.” God, she had probably spilled all of his secrets already.

“Tadashi! You didn’t tell me that Terushima was so charming.” He narrows his eyes at her, shouldn’t she be asleep?

“I’m just heating up leftovers for the both of you and then I’ll go, I promise.” And to his horror, Tadashi finds a photo album of his baby pictures on the table. Nooooo.

“Mom, why’d you show this? I’m embarrassed.”

“Don’t be, you looked very cute.” He punches Yuuji on the arm.

“Of course, you’re going to say that now and tease me about it later.”

“I won’t, I promise. I promise.” He says between laughter. God, he’ll never recover from the teasing will he?

True to her word, his mother disappears and they both sit down for breakfast.

“I’m sorry about my mum.”

“Hey, why are you saying that? She was really nice.”

 They talk about nothing important, mainly volleyball during breakfast and also about how Yuuji was in the college prep class? What a contrast to his punk vibes.

Yuuji prepares to leave after breakfast, and Tadashi hands him back the sheer shirt he had lent for his heat.

“Yuuji, can I scent mark you?” Yuuji’s eyes light up, grin bright as the sun.

“You don’t even have to ask.”

“You sure it’s not going to affect the fake punk image you have going on? To smell like an omega?”

“It’s not fake, I am a punk!”

“A punk who is in college prep class.” 

Tadashi stands in front of Yuuji who stands ever so still, waiting. He doesn’t move as Tadashi rubs his glands on the alpha’s face and neck.

“Done! Goodbye, Yuuji.”

“What? I don’t get a goodbye kiss?”

Tadashi shakes his head, he’s so stupid, and pulls Yuuji in for a kiss. Their lips part and Yuuji steps away.

“I’ll get going then.” 

Tadashi holds onto his arm, “Do you have to?”, and pulls him into another kiss.

“I have to, I told my sister I’d help her with her homework.”

“Aww, the punk who wears leather and rides a motorbike helps his sister with her homework.”

“Hey! Besides, if I wasn’t leaving you wouldn’t kiss me so much.”

“One last kiss.” 

Just then, there’s a knock on the door. It’s too early for deliveries, Tadashi thinks as Yuuji opens the door.

It’s Tsukki.

[bxthharmon]

Never Go Home Again, Pt. III || JJ Maybanks x Reader

Words: 2336

Series Warnings: violence / talking about abuse / toxic relationships / talking about nudes sex tapes and sex / drugs / underage drinking

Pt. Warnings: Underage drinking / fighting / gun

Series Summary: A new girl, a shoebox of old memories, a past she’s trying to forget coincide with a hotheaded, but selfless, boy.  teenagers getting in way over their heads

Pt. Summary: Y/N is introduced to keggers and high speed boat chases in John B’s quest for treasure.

A/N: Okay so i’ve got like half of this series drafted, so updates shouldn’t be toooooooo slow. let me know if u wanna be tagged!!

Chapters linked in my masterlist.

“masterlist”

A kegger was both exactly what you thought it would be. It was full of booze, bad dancing and bad flirting, which was just about the only thing all teenagers had in common. You were laughing at something Pope was saying (some joke about dead bodies farting?) when Kiara interrupted you.

“What the hell is she doing here?” she nodded towards Sarah, who was sat on a tower, while Topper dried to persuade her to get down.

“Sarah?” you asked, thinking of how the two of you had been hanging out everyday until you met the pogues. “What’s wrong with Sarah?”

Before Kiara could respond, JJ shushed her, explaining that something had gone on between the two, and therefore never to ask in front of Kiara, earning him a middle finger.

You looked between the two girls, frustrated that your only two girl friends on the island hated each other. Kie wandered off, muttering about ‘pretentious kooks’, leaving JJ to ask you what was wrong.

“Sarah was my first friend here, we were hanging out like, every day until I met you guys. Just my luck that Kie hates her, right?” You sighed, leaning backwards onto him, and he wrapped an arm around your waist. “I get that y’all hate the kooks, I mean I don’t get on with rich people either, but Sarah was really nice to me, and she was fun. Why can’t her and Kie get on?”

JJ sighed, kissing your temple, “C’mon, let’s just go get wasted.”

You followed through with that plan. You and JJ must have had three blunts between you, and way too much alcohol. 

At some point, you left JJ’s side and ended up sitting down with Kie, talking about him.

“What the hell is going on with you and JJ?”

“Nothing.” 

“C’mon Y/N, you know that’s bullshit.”

“Look, Jay stays at my house every few days, and we’re close, that’s it.”

“Jay? He never lets anyone call him Jay. Y/N, the only reason he stays at John B’s is because they’ve been friends since 3rd Grade. He doesn’t sleep around people’s houses or invite them out with us unless he’s fully invested in the relationship, and that takes a lot with him. You can’t pretend there’s nothing there!”

“Okay…” you sighed, “yeah like, he keeps on pulling shit, and, like, making me think he likes me, but he hasn’t kissed me or anything! I mean, how do I take that?”

“He’s scared of fucking up. Look, he’s been through shit, him and his dad don’t get on, and he’s seen so many broken relationships, he wants to get it right with you.”

“Ya think?” you smiled to yourself.

“Hell yeah!” she laughed, “He’s batshit crazy over you!”

You grinned. “I don’t know man, and my dad’s like super anti-boys right now, and I’m scared this is all gonna go to shit, you know? Like, I got shit goin’ on at home,” she nodded, “like, my dad’s job is barely paying the bills and we gotta pay moving fees and shit as well, I’m gonna have to find a job so we don’t go under.”

“Hey, my dad’s always short on waiters at the Wreck, I’ll ask him to add you to the rotor.”

“Kie, you’re a lifesaver!”

You hadn’t been paying attention to your surroundings, and it was only when a crowd started gathering that you got up to investigate, pulling Kie with you.

You fought your way to JJ’s side, watching as Topper dunked John B under the waves. You went to intervene, but JJ pulled you back, muttering something like “I got this.”

Next thing you knew, there was a gun to Topper’s head.

People were screaming, JJ was saying something to Topper, but all you could focus on was how much of an impulsive idiot that boy was. You felt numb, only reacting properly when he fired shots into the air. One, two. 

You pulled the gun off him, not caring where it landed, and pounded into his chest, screaming at him for being an idiot, for being impulsive, for not thinking. He started to argue, but seeing the tears streaming down your face and how worked up you were, he pulled you in, cradling your head and shushing you, murmuring apology after apology. You stood there, consumed in his scent, as he held you.

At some point, when the beach was near empty, he pulled away, and you walked slowly, hand in hand, until you reached your house. “Wanna stay over?” you offered. He nodded, quiet, almost in shock, about what he’d done. You unlocked the door, pulled off your shoes, and crept up the stairs.

--

“Does anybody know how to dive?” Kiara asked, looking around. “Anybody?”

“It’s kind of a kook sport.” JJ pointed out.

“I read about it.” offered Pope, and you shook your head, exasperated.

“Great,” you mocked, “Pope read about it, so someone’s gonna die.”

“Look you put the thing in your mouth and breathe,” JJ motioned, “how hard could it be?”

“Well if you come up too fast nitrogen gets in your blood and you get the bends.” Pope said. 

“I watched some David Attenborough documentary in 5th Grade about fishers in, like, Malaysia getting the bends.” You added, “It was weird.”

“Bends,” JJ said, “Like bend over and-” he was giving you a full view of his ass.

“The bends kill you.” you clarified.

“Right.”

“I’ll dive.” you offered.

“Since when can you dive?” Kie asked.

“I don’t know, since I watched a documentary in 5th Grade?” you sighed.

“Y/N,” JJ shook his head, “You’re not diving.”

You glared at him, but didn’t fight.

“I’ll dive.” John B offered.

“I’m cool with that.” JJ shrugged.

Pope explained to John B where and when he needed to stop, so you pulled your top off and dived into the water to mark the spot.

Upon your entry, Kie asked “What was that about?”

“I don’t know,” JJ raised his eyebrows, “But I liked it. A lot.” 

Kie smacked his leg, and he laughed, watching your entry spot.

“When you’re down there, you look for the cargo hold,” JJ held up the little stick, “You stick this thing inside and you twist and pull.”

“Stick in, twist, pull.” John B affirmed.

You surfaced, swimming back to the boat, the boys looking over as JJ helped you out of  the water. “I tied my t-shirt to the anchor chain about ten feet down so you know where to stop.”

John B nodded, pulling the gear on and getting ready to dive. You watched as Kie kissed John B’s cheek before he went down, and you nudged her as she walked back. You gave her a questioning look and she shrugged, a bashful look adorning her.

“If you don’t ask, I won’t ask about you and JJ.” she bargained, and you watched as JJ’s head popped up at the sound of his name.

“There’s nothing to ask about.” you smirked. “Hey.” you nodded to the approaching boat, “Isn’t that the police? Let me do the talking.” 

You walked to JJ and Pope, JJ wrapping his arm around your shoulders in an attempt to be chill. Pope tied the boats together.

“Evening, Officer.” You greeted, Time for a light flirt, just enough to make him like you.

“Do I know you?” Shoupe asked you.

“Nah,” you shook your head, crossing your arms so your boobs pushed together slightly. “Just moved from LA, two weeks ago.”

“Well how are you kids doing? You know the marsh is closed?” 

“It is?” you asked, feigning innocence. Small bash of the eyelashes. “Why?”

“Conducting a search, a boat went down. See anything?”

“Nope,” you popped the ‘p’, “We’ll let ya know if we do.”

“Where’s your friend that you always hang with? Is he here?”

“Working.” you explained, smiling happily up at him.

“I’m gonna check your little boat out.” he stood up.

“Sure,” you cleared the way, ignoring the way JJ was watching you interact with the officer.

He picked up a life jacket, “Y’all got another one of these?”

“‘Course,” you shrugged, “in the hold, Show ‘im.” you beckoned to JJ, who obliged, opening up the hold.

“A’ight.” Shoupe nodded, standing on the edge of the boat, looking down to where John B was due to appear. You all shared a glance. “A’ight.” 

“We’ll let ya know if we see anythin’, Officer.” you smiled again. “And we’ll be on our way out soon, Sir.”

“Yes, you will.” the boat pulled away.

As soon as the boat was gone, you all leaned over the side.

“He’s definitely out of air.” Pope reminded you all.

As if summoned, he broke the surface, and the four of you made a collective sigh of relief.

“How’d it go down there?” JJ asked. “Find anything?”

“Did I find anything?” John B laughed, pulling out a duffel bag as he hoisted himself out.

“There we go!” JJ grinned, taking the bag, “that’s my boy!”

“You okay?” Kie asked.

“I ran out of air.” John B said. Pulling himself into the boat.

“Yeah the cops were up here but, uh, turns out Y/N knows how to lie pretty fuckin’ well.” Pope explained.

“Yeah, you kinda missed the show, brother.” JJ agreed, winking at you. 

“Jeez, chill,” you rolled your eyes, “It’s just practice.” JJ raised an eyebrow.

“Hey guys,” Kie called, “Guys, bogey, two o’clock.”

You looked up, “Y’all recognise that boat?”

“Never seen it.” Kie looked back at you. “What are they doing back here? The marsh is closed.”

“I don’t know, but let’s not stick around to find out.” JJ reasoned.

“Should we wait on them?”

“No, we’re not gonna wait on them!”

JJ pulled in the anchor, yelling not to wait for him, and John B began to steer away, everyone talking at once.

“Are they coming for us?

“Maybe they’re fishing.”

“Go, go, go, go!”

“Into the marsh!”

“Let’s go!”

“I’m going, act natural.”

You watched as the boat followed you into the marsh.

“They’re following.” You pointed out. “JB, hurry the fuck up.” 

“I am!” came the response.

The boat sped up. “Dude is that a fucking gun?” you shouted, and suddenly JJ was on top of you, pulling you down as a gunshot fired.

“Shit! John B, get down!”

“Oh my God we’re gonna die!”

You rolled out from under JJ, ignoring his efforts to grab you, taking a rope and net off Kie. You stood up, ignoring the shouts from your friends as you worked your way past John B to the sturn and threw the rope and net out, behind the boat, stopping the boat behind you. Breathing out a breath you didn’t know you were holding, feeling JJ grab you, checking for blood before crushing you in a hug.

He didn’t break contact until you were on solid ground, standing around the bag, waiting for John B to open the bag. 

“Can you please just open the bag?” Pope yelled.

“Jeez, Pope, that was a rare outburst of emotion.” JJ mocked.

“Okay, you guys are literally killing me with anticipation.” he groaned. “Just open the bag. We almost died over this.”

You all watched intently as John B pulled a bag from the bag, and then a waterproof container from that bag, and finally a compass from that. Disappointed, you stepped back.

“Oh wow,” You snarked, “Yup, that’s about right. Good job, everybody, we found a compass.” You noticed how John B kept staring at the compass, and sighed. “Dude, what? It’s not worth anything.”

“This was my father’s.” he murmured. 

Now, perhaps it was the fact that you hadn’t spent the last nine months dealing with the fact that John B’s father was missing, but you felt out of place amongst your friends’ reactions.

--

You settled into the sand, arm touching JJ’s, and feet thrown out below you. 

“Something about hanging out with you and your friends seems to be getting me in trouble.” you sighed, not noticing the way he gazed at you, adoration painted onto his features.

“Blame JB.” he reasoned.

“You say that like you’re not the biggest trouble-maker in that group.” you giggle, and he smirked.

“Nah, I don’t know what you’re on about, man.” he smirked.

“Jay, did you just call me ‘man’?” you laughed.

“Maybe.” he looks at you again, watching you laugh. You roll your head to look at him, your nose millimetres away from his. In the dark, the only details he can make out are your out line and the glitter in your eyes, shining with glee. 

You take each other in, basking in the moment, John B’s drama and your thoughts and fears dissipating, however momentarily. He reached up, slowly, and took a strand of hair, tucking it loosely behind your ear. He watches how your silhouette moves, and he can picture your blush. You blink, the shine of your eyes disappearing for a split second. He watches you turn your face back to the sky, pointing up. 

“That’s Cassiopeia.” you point out the ‘W’ shape in the sky.

“I’ve heard of that.” JJ murmurs, feeling your body shake with laughter beside him.

“The vain queen.” you sighed. “She boasted of her beauty, and in his anger, the God Poseidon condemned her kingdom to attacks by, like, water nymphs or something? To end the attacks, she sacrificed her daughter, Andromeda, who was saved by the God Perseus. They married, and at their wedding, one of Andromeda’s suitors tried to claim her back, but was turned to stone by the head of Medusa, which Perseus used to kill the suitor. Cassiopeia and King Cepheus didn’t close their eyes, so in light of their death, they were made to hang in the sky.” 

“How the hell do you know that?” JJ chuckled, and you laughed.

“I don’t even know.” you smiled. “And that’s the Big Dipper, or Ursa Major. And that one there is Orion.” You looked back at JJ, “What?”

“You’re beautiful.”

Tags: @tangledinsparkles​ @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @lolitstiana​ @ilikealotofpeople-younotsomuch​ @teamnick​

[illfoandillfie]

5 Simple Rules For A Successful Fake Relationship: Picture Perfect

5 SIMPLE RULES MASTERLIST

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Summery:  A whole day with Ben's family and no way to escape. How will you survive? And will any rules be left intact by the end of the night?

Warnings: SMUT (finally lmao), nothing like super kinky but it is explicit, plus the usual stuff,  drinking, mention of smoking.

Words: 6284

A/N: ARE YA'LL READY FOR THIS? smut scene is marked with a *** so you can skip it if you like.

Taglist:  @laedymoon  @dtfrogertaylor  @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor  @hannafuckingsucks  @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @supersonicfreddie @tenement-funstah @taron-egrotten @johndeaconshands @borhapbois @thefairyfellersmasterstroke @queenlover05

@coni-martina @hardforbenhardy @cubedtriangle @vicouscirce @arianabrashierstuff @pattieboydwannabe @maggieroseevans @theprettyandthereckless @im-an-adult-ish​

A week later you were in the passenger seat of Ben’s car, your bags in the back, watching the scenery pass by. You found your eyes drawn to him more often than usual but he didn’t seem to notice. Maybe it was that he was so focused on the road and the traffic around you or maybe it was because you were playing I spy and a few glances from the person who’d spied the object were expected. I spy was a good game. Distracting enough to focus your mind on something other than wanting Ben. For the most part at least. “And we can definitely still see it?” “Yuuuuuuup,” you popped the ‘p’ and glanced over at Ben again. “And it starts with ‘M’ but isn’t ‘Mazda’ like what’s driving behind us, or Mars Bar like what I was just eating?”” “Nope,” you popped the p again and laughed, “d’you want a clue?” “Go on then, otherwise we’ll be stuck like this all day,” “We’ve been following them since we got on the motorway,” Ben’s forehead creased as he thought about your clue, “Truck doesn’t start with ‘M’,” “Clever boy. You deserve a gold star for that one,” “Bite me,” You laughed and gave in to the temptation to look at him again, noting the crease of his forehead as he thought about your clue, “Should I just tell you?” “Fine, I’m never going to get it at this rate,” “I spy with my little eye a mudflap girl. Two of them actually,” “What the fuck is a mudflap girl?” You pointed at the silhouette on the tuck’s mudflaps, “Her. The chick with the stupidly pinched in waist and big knockers.” “Is that what they’re called?” “What knockers?” “No, I’m perfectly familiar with those,” Ben laughed and you whistled teasingly, willing your mind to stop picturing what it was picturing “Shush, I meant the mudflap girls, is that what they’re called?” “Yeah. You didn’t know?” He shook his head slightly, “Never really came up.” “Sorry, would have picked something else if I’d realised,” “‘s fine. Just means I won’t hold back with the next one.” You’d been a little nervous at the prospect of driving hours with just Ben for company, still coming to grips with the fact you wanted to knock boots with him. You couldn’t even think about it in direct language, just roundabout phrases your mum used to use. But, thankfully, all your concerns had disappeared the moment you got into the car, infected by Ben’s bright smile and insistence that he’d make it fun. His definition of fun was a lot of classic driving games, hence the I Spy, plenty of road trip snacks, and a healthy dose of a specially curated driving playlist. You’d made fun of him for including I’m In Love With My Car on it but he just turned it up louder and sang it at you which only made you laugh more. It stopped any awkwardness or uncomfortable silences in their tracks. But all the laughter and playful teasing was just another reminder of how close you were and that made you think about how badly you wanted to do the dirty with him, hear him whining your name, feel his hands all over you, cuddle up with him and doze as he read to you. You shook your head as the third image sprang to the forefront of your mind. That wasn’t right. Bumping uglies was one thing but dozing was out of the question. Unless it was in a post-coital come down of course. Not that any of it mattered since you weren’t going to act on it. Joe had made it very clear that something actually happening was a bad idea. Although, looking at Ben now he didn’t seem to be that bad off. Certainly not white knuckling it as Joe had said. He was happy and bubbly and you couldn’t see a single sign of him falling apart. What did Joe know anyway? He lived so far away, how could he possibly know what was good for Ben or, for that matter, you.

Halfway there you found a place to pull up so you could stretch your legs and refresh your snacks but then it was back into the car for the second leg of the trip, winding through the traffic until it thinned out and you pulled up outside a nice white house with a tidy yard. “This is it?” you asked, the nerves back in full force. “Yeah, you good?” You just nodded your head but Ben gave your hand a reassuring squeeze, “Remember the plan, yeah? Hold hands as much as we can, look as loved up as possible, just like what we do for the cameras. What’s our story?” “Met at the audition for Edith since you’d already been cast. Hung out a lot as prep for the movie. You asked me out a couple of days before filming began and we dated secretly for a while but then, partway through filming, we were caught by paparazzi and decided to be open about it.” “Very good. What el- shit, no time for the rest of the pop quiz, the front door just opened.” “It’s okay, I’m good. We’ve been doing this for months now, it’s just more of the same.” Ben nodded and then let your hand go so he could get out of the car. You opened your door and stepped out, smoothing out your skirt, your hand cold outside of Ben’s grasp. But he fixed the problem, taking your hand again as he led you towards the front door and the person who’d come out onto the driveway. He squeezed your hand again. “Hi mum. This is Y/N,” “Well it’s about time,” his mum said, already stepping forward to hug you, forcing you to drop Ben’s hand “lovely to meet you, darling.” “Pleasure to meet you too Mrs Jones,” you smiled politely as she stepped back. “Oh, Angela, please,” her hands were still on your shoulders as she examined your appearance, “Gosh aren’t you pretty.” You managed to stutter out a thank you, suddenly feeling much more shy than you normally would have. “Oh c’mon mum, let her go.” “I’m just saying she’s beautiful, what’s wrong with that?” but her hands fell from you as she turned her attention to Ben, “I still think you’re very handsome too Ben. Need a bit of a haircut though.” He rolled his eyes but hugged her all the same. “Mikey’s already there setting up with your father and I expect you’ll be giving him a hand soon?” “Can I not have five minutes out of the car before I get piled up with chores?” Ben whined as you both followed her inside.

She led you on a brief tour of the house, pointing out where the bathrooms were and coming to an end at Ben’s old room where you’d be staying. She promised you enough time to grab your bags and freshen up before you’d be asked to help and then she headed back towards the front of the house. You peeked inside the bedroom door hoping to see what teenage Ben’s sense of style was but it had since been redecorated. “Don’t look so disappointed,” Ben laughed, “Mum had the whole house redone a few years ago and it didn’t make sense to keep my room how it was.” “Please tell me there’s photos here somewhere,” “Probably but you’re not seeing them,” “You have to tell me something, I’m your girlfriend and I need to know.” “Fuck off, you do not,” “Please?” you extended the word in a childish whine, pouting at him until he broke. “What d’you want to know then?” “What’d you have on your walls? Band posters?” Ben laughed, “Uhhh, a few sports things – my favourite teams and that. Some girls with big tits leaning all over cars…Couple of theatre posters too,” “Nerd,” “Shut up,” he laughed again, pushing against your shoulder, “Sorry about Mum by the way,” “It’s totally fine,” “I promise it’ll all be over soon,” You were taken aback as he wrapped you up in a tight hug but very happily relaxed against him. Carefully, so as not to break the moment you looked up at him only to find him looking back at you. It was the closest you’d been since the almost-kiss in the hotel. Sure, you’d been close, even hugged before, but not in this long, lingering way and even then, it was mostly just in public. A sharp knock at the door made you break apart. “Sorry to rush you but Mikey’s just called asking after you. Better get a move on,” “Who’s Mikey?” you asked, refusing to acknowledge the tension in the air. “My brother, Michael. S’pose we should crack on. You’ve got about twelve bags to pull from the car.” “Fuck off, it’s only two and one of them’s a hand bag. Plus, it’s you’re fault for not being more specific about dress code.” You hadn’t known exactly what to pack and got no clear answer when you’d asked, so you’d packed a few different outfit options, from casual jeans and a nice blouse to a slightly more fancy little black dress, the clutch you’d taken to the French restaurant packed with it in case you needed a stylish purse. “You’re such a drama queen. Just help me with them yeah?”

You would have known he was Ben’s brother even before you’d heard about him. His face was thinner and his shoulders less broad but they had the same smile, same eyes. He was lovely too, jumped down off a chair and dropped the coil of fairy lights he’d been holding so he could shake your hand and introduce himself. Then came their dad, maybe not quite as warm as their mum but just as welcoming. Both you and Ben were handed lengths of lights and sent off to find places to hang them. Inside it wasn’t necessary since the restaurant was already lit up, staff busting about making sure everything was ready for that afternoon. So Ben led you away from the big open door, into the beer garden. It was mostly paved, small shoots of grass sprouting up through the bricks, though there was also a large strip of grass at the very end of the yard. Ben’s brother and dad were on one side of the yard, securing their lights to the fence so you and Ben headed straight for the grassy end where the light of the restaurant wouldn’t quite reach. “Wait here a sec,” Ben said, handing you his coil of lights and turning back towards the paved area. You watched as he dragged on of the sturdy wooden tables over to you. At the first scrape of the wood on the brick he looked inside to see if anyone was going to go mad at him but, aside from his family members, no one noticed. When he finally got it in position, he climbed up onto the table and held out his hand for the lights. You kept lookout as he wound the wire around a tree branch and then jumped down again, handing the end of the lights to you so you could wrap it around the tree trunk and secure the battery pack out of harm’s way, as he pushed the table back into place. It wasn’t long before the yard was covered with lights extending from the doorway all the way to the fence that blocked the yard from the road. Of course, all that work meant you deserved a drink so, by the time Ben’s mum and other family members began arriving in the late afternoon, you were already halfway through your first glass. Ben gave you a running commentary of everyone who walked into the restaurant. “That’s my cousin and her daughter. And the couple behind her are my,” he thought for a moment, “Well let’s call them cousin’s too because I don’t know how seconds and removals work. The bald guy over there talking to Mum is my great uncle. And the woman who just waved is an Aunt. Whatever you do, don’t mention her son. He’s had a run in with the law and it’s a touchy subject.” “Noted. But shit, when you said family get together you really meant it,” “Yeah,” Ben laughed, “The Jones’ don’t do things by halves. ‘Specially not when there’s drinking involved.”

As the place began to fill Ben took you around to meet people. You felt a little like the ball in a pinball machine, bouncing from one person to another, introducing yourself and then moving on to someone else, almost immediately forgetting any names you’d just been told. It was almost like doing interviews again except with more movement and more alcohol. Ben kept a hold of you, either interlocking his fingers with yours or else wrapping his arm around your waist, keeping you close to his side, only letting you go to grab you another drink or light up a cigarette. At one point you had a small crowd gathered beside you, all pointing out things they’d seen in magazines or on the internet about you, all wanting to hear about how you met. Thankfully you’d become quite practiced at telling the story. “We met at the audition actually,” Ben said, “I had the part but they wanted to try me with different actresses to find someone that would work well on screen. I’d met, I don’t know, eight or nine women and then Y/N came into the room. She looked kinda nervous,” You shook your head in disagreement but Ben ignored you. “but we got a chance to say hi before we had to read the lines and we just clicked.” “Our director really liked us together so I got a call back and we did another scene,” “So they could, y’know, see us kiss, make sure the chemistry was there.” “They must have liked it because I got the part. We did a couple of weeks of all this, um, like, bonding stuff. The rest of the main cast was there too but me and Ben had a few one on one things because we were playing a couple that was already engaged so they wanted us to look really connected.” “Anyway, I wanted to ask her out after day one but I wasn’t sure if I should because we’d be working together,” “I took a little longer to see him in that light but he was so sweet and charming and fun to be around, and by the end of the week I was thinking the same thing. Only neither of us wanted to make the first move because if it wasn’t mutual then it could make the next few months of work really awkward.” “Eventually one of the other actors pointed out how into me she was so I asked her out for a coffee and it went from there.” He returned your smile and then pulled you closer into his side, dropping a kiss to the top of your head as you leaned against his chest. “Well your casting director knew what they were doing because you two are adorable together.” A few more questions followed but eventually Ben was able to extract you from the crowd with the excuse you needed more drinks. “Actually, I gotta run to the loo, I’ll bring some food back with me though, okay?” “Okay, I’m gonna grab another cocktail, you want anything?” “Beer’d be great,” “Sure thing, babe,” He smiled again as he left you but you were smiling too. There was something fun about the act. Even with everything that had happened and how mixed up and hard it had been at times, an evening like this was fun. He made you laugh and made sure you felt comfortable in what could have easily been an extremely uncomfortable situation. Plus, it meant you got to indulge the part of you that was still fantasising about being with him. You were allowed to kiss him and touch him because you were acting. There was no confusion about why, no worries about if you were crossing the line you’d put down, nothing to stop you from enjoying it. So what if occasionally your fantasies extended beyond just doing the horizontal tango? It wasn’t so bad to think about cuddling up in front of the TV with him.

Drinks in hand you headed back to where Ben had disappeared, trying to spot him in the crowd. “Y/N!,” You spun round to see who was talking, finding yourself face to face with Ben’s mum again. Angela, you reminded yourself. “Come join us over here,” she said leading you to a table where a few others sat, “You’ve met my husband Keith already, yes? And this is Doug and Katherine. This is Y/N, Ben’s girlfriend.” You took a seat and chatted with them, glancing around for Ben every so often. Eventually Doug and Katherine got up to talk to someone else and Keith went off in search of more food, leaving you and Angela alone. “Now, darling, Ben tells me you’ve got a work thing to get back home for tomorrow so you’ll be leaving a bit earlier than originally planned.” Angela said, patting your hand. “Yeah, um, it’s an audition,” you lied. It was a cover Ben had come up with so you didn’t get guilted into staying an extra day. “Well that does sound important. I’m sad we won’t have longer to get to know you though. I must admit, I saw a photo of you and Ben a while ago and I was hoping he’d bring you up because you just looked so lovely. And you obviously make him very happy, which is of course what every mother hopes for. So you have to come back soon so we can have a proper chat. Make a weekend of it or something.” You were a little taken aback, stunned to hear how much of an impact you’d had without meaning to. It made you feel a bit guilty. This was Ben’s family and you weren’t part of it, you shouldn’t be there. But you swallowed the doubts, tried to ignore how much you wanted it all to be real, and smiled back at her, “I’d love that. Just say when.” “Oh now don’t tempt me or I’ll have the date picked out before the end of the night. I don’t want to jump the gun or seem too forward but just seeing how you two are together…I hope you know you’re welcome in our family. Ben loves you a lot, I can tell.” “I know. And it’s very kind of you,” “I mean it darling. And if the next family get together was your wedding, well….but of course that’s neither here nor there.” You laughed it off but your insides were churning. “So this is where you got to,” Ben’s voice interrupted as he dropped into the seat beside you and lay his hand on your knee. You hadn’t realised your leg had been bouncing but you stopped it the moment he touched you. “I was just telling Y/N that you should come back again soon, when there’s no auditions to interrupt your stay.” “Sure, Mum,” Ben said, still touching your leg. You chatted for a bit longer until she got distracted enough for Ben to lean into your ear and softly ask, “You okay? Or do you want to get out of here?” “Please,” you whispered back. “Okay, follow me,” He took your hand and told his mum he wanted to introduce you to someone but you barely heard it, your head buzzing as you made a polite exit and let Ben lead you outside, making excuses to anyone who tried to stop you. As soon as you were clear of the venue he pulled out his phone to find a car, one hand on your lower back, rubbing soft circles over your shirt until you felt you could breathe easy again. “Better?” “Thank you. How’d you know?” He shrugged, “I just know you. I saw your leg bouncing and figured Mum had said something,” “She mentioned us getting married,” “What? Why the fuck would that have come up?” “It was just a passing comment but I….” You half shrugged, trying to find the right words. “It’s okay, c’mon, let’s go home you can tell me everything.” You nodded and let him hug you as you waited for the car.  

Once you were inside Ben grabbed a couple of glasses from the kitchen and then headed into the dining room. “Thank you dad,” he mumbled as he pulled a bottle of Johnnie Walker Black Label out of a cupboard and turned to show you, “He’s kept a stash of this stuff in here since I was a kid. Got in trouble for stealing some a couple of times.” “Better not let him find out about this then,” you laughed, feeling more relaxed now that it was just you and Ben, a sizeable distance from the rest of the party. Ben chuckled along as he poured a little into each glass and carefully replaced the bottle, “So what happened back there?” “I don’t know,” you accepted your glass and took a sip, leaning against the corner of the table. Ben didn’t cut in, he just took his own drink and waited until you could say more. “I guess it was just harder to be around your family than I was expecting. It wasn’t the same as sitting in a restaurant on a date,” you drew the quotation marks in the air with your fingers, “That was a room full of people who care about you and they were all so lovely and welcoming and your mum said she’d been hoping you’d bring me here since she saw a photo of us and invited me back so she could get to know me and I said I’d love to because what else could I say and she seemed so happy about it and so pleased that you’re so happy and I feel so guilty about lying to them all. What if they find out? Your mum’ll be so disappointed.” “Don’t worry about lying to them, I’ve done it plenty before,” when you didn’t laugh he put his glass down beside you and took you free hand in his, “Seriously, Y/N, there’s nothing to feel guilty about. The premiere is coming up in a couple of weeks and then pretty soon after that we’ll break up and I’ll tell them it just wasn’t working, and they’ll accept it and never have to know the truth. And then we can forget this whole thing and move on.” You weren’t so sure that was what you wanted anymore, but you weren’t sure enough to say it. Instead you put your glass down as well and said, “but it must be hard for you too. Having me here and everything.” It was only when you looked at him that you realised how close you were standing. He was still holding your hand, his thumb rubbing back and forth over your fingers. “I’m a big boy, I can handle it.” You weren’t sure what compelled you to do it, the drink maybe, or just pent up sexual tension, but he was so close and he was looking at you with those eyes and before you could stop yourself you leaned in to kiss him. He seemed a bit shocked, taking half a step back, and you were sure he was going to tell you it wasn’t a good idea and then leave you standing there alone. But then his hand was on your jaw as he kissed you back, all hesitancy gone. You felt him sigh against you as if he’d been holding his breath, waiting for this to happen again, and pulled him in closer.

***

Maybe it was the months without sex, or maybe it was how often your mind had conjured similar scenes, or maybe it was just how good it felt to have him press you against the table to kiss you again, but whatever the reason it wasn’t long until you were pushing the hem of his shirt up over his stomach. He took the hint and stopped kissing you just long enough to pull it over his head, quickly finding your lips again as his fingers worked on the buttons of your shirt. He got about halfway through and then stopped, instead dropping his hands to your arse so he could lift you up and carry you up the hall towards his room. He kicked the door shut once he was through it and pressed you against it, kissing you as if to make up for lost time. It was a heady experience, being pinned to the door, your legs wrapped around him as you kissed messily. Too much and not enough all at once. You needed him closer still and clutched at his shoulders to try and make him understand. Either he really could read you well or he wanted the same thing because a moment later there was no longer a door behind you, Ben taking the few steps towards the bed and letting himself drop to the mattress. He pushed your shirt from your shoulders, no longer needing to hold you up, and ran his hands over your sides as if trying to map out he lines of your body. A whine escaped you as your need to remove layers grew and you dropped your hands to his belt, fumbling blindly with the buckle. A voice in your head told you it was a bad idea. You still weren’t certain of your feelings, weren’t sure doing this would cure you of them or if it’d just make everything messier than it already was. But the voice got quieter with every shift of your hips and every stroke of his fingers. “You’ve no idea how much I’ve thought about this,” he mumbled against your neck. All you could manage was a small whimper of agreement as he kissed you again, and traced his fingers up to the clasp of your bra. It was on the floor in seconds, his hands replacing the material, only making you want more. You arched your back into his touch, panted against his lips. He smiled, circled a nipple with his thumb, delighted in your response.

Suddenly he flipped you over so you were sitting on the bed, kissed you again and then stood up. “Ben?” you were worried he was going to put an end to things before they got too far. Thankfully he didn’t, just shucked off his pants. You almost laughed in relief as he leaned over you again, making quick work of the fastening of your skirt so it too could join the clothing on the floor. The voice in your head was gone, silenced by the pure desperate need to have him touch you more, and he was making no moves to stop it either as you shuffled further up the bed, pulling him along with you. You let out a choked off moan as he kissed a trail down your neck, tilted your head to the side so he could reach all the spots that made you gasp. But it still wasn’t enough. You were going to go crazy with need if you didn’t get something more soon, so you let your hand fall between you, rubbed your palm over the front of his boxers, felt him rock his hips against your hand, already hard. He sat back on his knees so he could slip your underwear down your legs. “Fuck,” he groaned as soon as he realised how wet you were. You grabbed his wrist and put his hand between your legs, hoping he’d take the hint. He did, trailing his fingers between your lips, over your clit. Your breath caught as he slipped a lone digit into you, slowly, easing you into it before he added a second. He watched you closely, eyes half lidded and soft, the tip of his tongue poking out from between his teeth like he was concentrating on memorizing every inch of you, inside and out. Even in that moment, when your breaths were coming shaky and uneven, and your skin was burning under his gaze, even then all you could think was how hot he looked, hair ruffled, lips kiss swollen, completely enraptured by you. He shifted his finger slightly and your eyes fluttered shut. “There, babe, fuck, right there,” you sighed. “Like that?” he asked softly, twitching his fingers against you again. You nodded though he drew a more vocal response from you a few seconds later when he added a third finger and leaned down to suck your nipple between his lips. He hummed when he heard you say his name and repeated the same motion in the same place, so you said his name again, louder, and then again and again as he kept going, hitting you exactly where you needed him. You were almost surprised by how quickly he managed to pull you over the edge. Almost. But it had been a while and he’d always promised he was good. He worked you through it before he carefully withdrew his fingers and kissed you again, stealing what little breath you had left.

And then he stopped. Sat back again. You blinked your eyes open and reached for him as he leaned over the edge of the bed, opened the draw of the beside cabinet and swore. Pulling himself back towards you he took your outstretch hand and kissed the back of it, “I don’t have any condom’s here,” he sounded apologetic. “I have some, wait,” you kissed him quickly before you stood, a little unsteady, and opened the wardrobe door, thankful Felicity had given you the handful of them and that you’d brought the bag with you. He looked like he was about to ask why but the sight of you climbing onto the bed, straddling him, with one hand on his chest to lay him down, made the question die in his throat. He let his head fall back onto the pillow as you pulled his underwear off and rolled the condom on as quick as you could manage. And then you sank down onto him, trying to take your time. “Fuck,” you whined, pausing to give you both a moment to adjust. His hand grabbed onto your waist, fingertips pressing into you, encouraging you to move. It was soft but not quite, both of you panting and groaning as you raised and lowered yourself on him, building up to a steady rhythm. His hands roamed over you, grabbing your arse the way he had done on his couch, moving over your breasts, squeezing your hips, gentle but firm pulling you to speed up each time. You needed to be closer though, so you leaned down to kiss him again, grunting at the change of position. But it interrupted your flow, made you stutter out of time, so Ben propped himself up on his elbows, and then when that wasn’t enough, sat up fully, his knees rising behind you. One hand was braced on your back to keep you steady as you circled your hips, the other cupped your cheek as his forehead leaned against yours, every uneven breath audible, able to feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest under your palm. “I love you,” he sighed, his nose bumping against yours as he searched for your lips again. You were on the verge of repeating his words back to him when he dropped his hand from your cheek, let it fall between you and brush against your clit, the confession lost in your moan. “You gonna c-cum for me?” You nodded, leaning into his neck as you did your best to keep riding him, legs shaking with the effort and your approaching release. He didn’t let up until you were crying out into his shoulder, following close behind you with his own moan.

***

You lost track of how long you sat there, leaning against each other as you came down, lost track of where you were, lost track of the reality of your relationship. Your instinct was to keep clinging to Ben, keep kissing along his jaw and nose as you pulled yourselves back together. But it was too much for him. He let go of you suddenly, as if just touching you was painful. “I’ve gotta…” he said with a half hearted nod in the direction of the doorway. “Oh. Right, yeah,” you climbed off him, trying not to react to the sudden emptiness, the sudden cool of the air outside of his embrace. Ben moved to the edge of the bed, glanced at you, ran his hand through his hair. “I wasn’t expecting that to happen,” you offered somewhat lamely, not sure how to explain everything you were feeling. “Neither. Are you okay?” “Yeah. I, um, it was really good and I-I think I kind of needed it.” This was it. There was no more running from what you were feeling. No more pretending it was platonic or just physical. You had to come clean, to yourself as much as to Ben. Ben smiled but it was a pained kind of smile, “It was good for me too. Really good. But it can’t ever happen again.” He stood up before you could say anything else, tied off the condom and put his boxers back on, making a hasty retreat. Something stirred in your memory and you had the sudden urge to tell him he couldn’t leave you because he owed you a third orgasm, but it was too late. He was gone and you were left sitting there, naked and alone, waiting for him to come back so you could explain. When enough time had passed without his return you got up, put your pyjamas on and went to the bathroom, running on autopilot as you considered everything that had just happened. Maybe Ben was right to walk away. Maybe it had been a mistake. He probably wouldn’t believe you if you told him how you really felt. You’d taken too long to work it out, been too vocal about not feeling it. And it would be poor timing to say it right after you’d slept together. He’d think you were saying what he wanted to hear so he wouldn’t be embarrassed about saying it himself. And maybe it was down to all the tension between you. You’d spent all day pretending to be the loving girlfriend after all, maybe it had influenced you a bit, made you think you felt things you didn’t actually feel. But something that good, that tender, didn’t just happen with anyone, surely. It certainly hadn’t been like that with anyone else you’d been with casually. And you’d assumed that having sex with Ben would be the solution, that you’d finish and be fixed. No more thinking about him, no more wanting to be with him. But all you really wanted was to cuddle up beside him. Fall asleep in his arms. That wasn’t something you usually wanted from one night stands. Normally you’d want to get out as fast as possible not sit in their bedroom and wait for them. And the thought of everything else that could happen if he just knew it was what you wanted – waking up beside him, making him coffee, listening to him play stupid love songs on his stupid guitar, comforting him on bad days, being his actual fucking girlfriend and not just his pretend one – all of that sounded so fucking wonderful. It couldn’t just be endorphins making you feel like that. There had to be something of substance behind it all. Afterall they’d been there for a while now, those feelings. It wasn’t like the sex had conjured them. You’d been pretending not to notice them but they’d been there for months. So the only way forward was to tell him.

When you got back to the bedroom Ben was there, curled away from you on a makeshift bed on the floor. He could have been sleeping except his shoulder’s were too rigid, holding too much tension. “Ben?” He didn’t respond, just kept feigning sleep. So you switched out the light and tiptoed to the bed, crawling under the covers. The sheets still smelt like him and it made your heart ache. What if you just said it? You sat up, turned your head in his direction. “Ben?” it came out as more of a whisper than you’d have like so you tried again, “Ben, I-I-” If you said it now would he join you? Or would he pretend he hadn’t heard? You fell silent again at that thought, not sure you could cope with it. Maybe you’d just hold off for a bit. Wait until the premiere. Give yourself time to find the exact right words to explain your apparent change of heart. He couldn’t write you off as trying to spare him some embarrassment if you said it weeks after he’d let it slip in the throws of passion. He’d have to take you seriously then. “Goodnight,” you sighed, and lay down again, though try as you might, you couldn’t sleep. You lay there in the dark, sure Ben was just as awake as you were, with only one thought in your head. You loved Ben. And you didn’t know what to do about it.

[zuffer-weird-girl]

Would you be willing to write a scenario about Kai's s/o going in to labor and the delivery? Maybe just Kaito?

Lets give plague doctor more heart attacks :D

Honestly? You deserved at minimun a pat on your back, because carrying a child is not easy... and aparently carrying a Chisaki inside you was equal to hell.

Deadly cramps, torturous nauseas and dear lord even comenting the word 'peas' left you wanting to pull all of your stomach out.... all of this for exactly seven months and a half already.

The baby was surely a fighter. His kicks were dead ass strong and ever time it was a bad one, you would wince in pain while supporting yourself on somewhere.

This baby was going to knock you out at some point...

Ever time Kai notice that this was happening he would place his entire gloved and scold his unborn child.

'Not even in here and are already causing trouble brat? Be good to your mother or we might have trouble.'

It was always in that same no emotions present tone of voice of his but you could see the genuine adoration in those usual cold golden eyes.

Although today you were feeling quite... normal.

No deadly kicks, neither the urge to puke ans surprisingly your feets weren't sore!

What a great day!

You got up from your chair to grab something to eat as you carresed slightly your belly on the way.

Although when you were already half the hall you started to feel dizzy and had to support yourself omwith one hand on the wall.

"Woah not looking great there miss. You good?" You heard Mimic's voice but when you looked down you just saw a black blur.

"Y-Yeah..." you took a shaky step "I guess."

"You guess?" Mimic spoke in sarcasm while Chrono coincidentally entered. Irinaka pointed to you for Kurono to see as he also made a slightly concerned face.

Before the man could ask what was going on, you felt as if a hammer had hit you in the gut while you howled in pain, no longer holding back the discomfort or the recent, unbearable pain.

Chrono and Mimic were immediately on your side when you almost fell to the ground. In your mind passes a thought that scared you to no ends and just to confirm you lowered your hand lower to push it back to see that your terrors were true.

Blood and other fluid... your water bag broke... The baby was coming earlier.

You let out a bloody scream at seing this and another joilt of pain came into you.

"ShIT ShE'S DyInG?!"

"Of course fucking not Irinaka! Shut up!" Chrono went to lend you a shoulder but you stopped him.

"K-Kurono... P-Please... K-Kai.. H-Here." You said between breaths, trying to stal calm since you knew this was going to stress the fuck out of everyone... especially Chisaki.

Hari didn't even objected and ran looking for Chisaki as Irinaka came back into his human form to at least see if it helps.

"Breath chick, you're a fucking fighter to carry that little shit."

"MIMIC!" you shouted and the man apologized at seing the anger in your eyes.

~

Chisaki was currently looking at the medicals exams of his unborn son along with the first ultrasound picture. The boy was going to be here soon and after a very long time he felt anxious.

He flinched at the way the door of his office hitted the wall as Chrono shouted his name.

"What the hell Chrono? Lost your manners?" He said darkly while placing the documents inside of his drawer.

"(Y/N)." He said while pointing at your direction "She's bleeding."

In one blink of Kurono's eyes Chisaki was already running through the house while placing his mask up.

Shit. What had happened?! Were you okay?!

"Angel." He called, ignoring his horror at seing the state you were in, and kneeled on the floor.

"Baby... coming." You breath out while jolting in pain again.

Damn those contractions

He cringed at your whines but ignored his own discomfort and scooped you up in his arms in bridal style as he shouted for a precept to clean ths mess as long for Chrono to get the fuck in the car.

Mimic swore he saw the walls trembling.

~

"Count to ten angel." He said monoustly but the way his hands tremble slightly and the hint of desperation in his eyes told everthing.

You screamed as the car suddenly roughly spun aside, the last drop of patience on your husband completely gone.

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT CHRONO?!"

"IM SORRY BUT A GUY ALMOST HITTED THE FUCKING CAR AND COULD HAVE KILLED US YOU KNOW?!" Poor Hari was consumed by both you and Overhaul's desperation.

"Oh my god both oF YOU SHUT UP!" You shouted causing both of them to be completly silent all the ride to the hospital.

He was going to talk to you about that later, but maybe it was a understatement since you were giving birth at this point.

~

Kurono had to hold back Chisaki when a bunch of nurses just pulled you out of Kai's arms and a doctor told him to wait outside.

His wife was giving birth to his soon son and he was supposed to wait OUTSIDE YOU FILFH UNPROFESSIONAL BASTARD?!

When a nurse came to Chrono, asking for him to get out of the room since only it was allowed the father, he arched one eyebrow at her and pointed with his palm at a very furious Chisaki, silently saying 'Im the one keeping the beast calm, you sure about that?'.

The nurse just gave him a apologetic look before, with the nerves on their skin of talking to a dangerous man of the yakusa, calling Overhaul.

The way Chisaki looked at them could be described as murderous and if he had a laser vision quirk the poor nurse would be already dead on the spot.

"I-I'm sorry! But you can enter now." She bowed apologetically while indicating the door for Chisaki.

He didn't even acknowledge her as he entered the room abruptly, ignoring many looks of the doctors and just making a bee line at you.

Despite your eyebags and squirming in pain figurine, you still manage to look angelic... just incredible.

"Angel, it's almost over." He said monoustly, a mix of pain and relief at seing the way you opened your eyes.

"Kai..." you whispered while crying... your hand desperately hilding the bed sheets as you cried out...

"Dad hold her hand!" A male nurse suggested and you almost laughed if it wasn't for the torturous pain you were in.

Someone was trying to give others to Chisaki? Your Chisaki Kai? Great joke.

Chisaki narrowed his eyes at the man befofe cringing at seing you crying again... you were in so much pain but yet refused to just grab his hand because you knew him.

He suddenly left to a quick bathroom and picked a hand sanitizer and a handkerchief.... the scene was almost comic to the doctors and nurses. A soon to be father wipping his wife's hand before holding it onto his gloved one.

"You don't change do you?" You whispered while smilling at him, pure appreciation and love on your eyes as you looked into those beautiful golden ones that you had fallen with.

"Why should I?" He said monotonously but you could see the hints of a smile behind that black face mask of his.

His hand suddenly cracked at your strenght as you turned your head away from him to muffle your screams.

...ouch.

The doctors were surprised because they LISTENED to his hand cracking and he was just... there. He suddenly glared at them with pire hate as his words spilled from his kouth like venom.

"Bunch of incompetents, my wife is having a kid and you just stand there without doing nothing? Move and help her before I lose my pacience bunch of filfh." They flinched before returning to their activities whiel Kai scoffed 'sicks' under his breath.

Your screams had stopped and your grip on his hand released, putting the pieces together he looked up and saw a tiny creature on the arms of one nurse.

"You did it." He amused out loud while you only let out a sleep deprived 'yay' before closing your eyes as you tried to catch your breath.

He picked the handkerchief and wiped your forehead gently before looking down at you.

"You're sweaty..."

"No shit sherlock I just gave birth." You said between breaths and giggles receiving a pinch on your arm along with a scoff of his.

"W-Why isn't he crying?" You suddenly breath out.

Shit. Is true. He haven't heard his son cries. He looked uo already with anger before he saw the doctor bringing a white blanket and handing rubbing the face of your new born to you.

"See mommy? Your baby is fine." He felt butterflies forming inside his stomach at seing the little boy face in contact with yours... you smilling tiredly but still manage to open your eyes to look at your son.

"Kaito... is so nice to meet you.." you teared up at seing your baby for the first time... he had his father looks.

He punched his chest to prevent any hints of despicable tears fron falling from his eyes but it was really damn difficult... Luckily he managed to stay with his stoic face at least.

The moment though he saw you closing your eyes he internally panicked.

"Angel." He grabbed your face and shook slightly, checking your pulse with his other hand and sighing in relief at feeling your heartbeat on his fingers.

"She is just tired, will come back as soon as she recuperates... would you like to hold your son mister?"

He eyed the doctor in suspicion before choosing to only look at his son, eyes secretly telling how much he was willing to do for this little one already.

"Place him on the crib for now. I want my wife to see the scene, she wouldn't leave me alone after knowing that I holded my son without her seing it." He spoke crudely amd coldly at the doctor bit they didn't seemed to mind at first.

The doctor nodded in understatement before placing the kid carefilly down on the crib, right besides Kai as he sitted on the edge of the bed... holding your hand in his gloved ones.

He took a glance at his sleeping son and decided to just carres the tip of his thumb on the chubby cheek.

He swore the kid just smiled at the contact... a simple contact... but it was rather a nice feeling.

"I made this brat..." he mused out loud for himself before smirking down at his son and bringing your freahly washed head to rest on him instead of the pillows of the hospital.

"Welcome to this world... Chisaki Kaito."

[cornwaiidesu]

a boohoo-y deep dive into my ~psyche~ cuz I had A Moment at work yesterday :P

I care too much about what people think of me. plain and simple. I have been this way since I was a little girl. my cousins would pick on me because I was the special baby girl out of the three of us and they were the two older boys. they would pick on me for being shy and soft spoken and liking girl things, and I wanted them to like me because I thought the two of them were the coolest boys in the world, so I grew to be a little tomboy. I wanted to like fighting games, and anime, and comics because those were "boy things".

but then when puberty started to set in, being a tomboy wasn't cute anymore. at least according to the bullies I had in middle school. usually boys who would call me a d*ke and make fun of me for wearing baggy t-shirts and loose pants and my dad's army jacket every single day of my life. "girls are supposed to be feminine" so obviously something had to be *wrong* with me and they would speculate shit about me directly in front of me. try to engage me in the conversation just to rub it in and of course that made me feel like shit.

so then in high school I try to flip the switch again. I start wearing tighter fitting clothes. I grow my hair out because I was constantly being dogged on my hairstyle even tho that shit was kind of REVOLUTIONARY FOR A 12 YEAR OLD LIVING IN IOWA. PROPS TO TEENAGE MRH. even back then I was a little punk. :3c I digress tho.

the beginning of high school was when I started my curse that lives on in me. I wear earrings every day of my life and I do because I convinced myself back then that I would be mistaken for a boy otherwise. and I still hold that fear because it was upheld! I started wearing dresses and skirts to school, but it didn't matter because dudes would still flip me shit and say that I was a predatory lesbian and strip me of my femininity. adults would still call me young man and sir despite being a 16 year old wearing make up, denim skirts, earrings, and covered in beaded necklaces. I would wear SO much jewelry to try to get it through people's minds that I was a girl.

but then through that came another weird thing where, like, though I was dressing ~feminine~ I was still "one of the guys" because I had a crude sense of humor and still liked comics and anime and wasn't as, for lack of a better word, "delicate" as my other (white) female friends. but then AGAIN I *couldnt* be one of the guys because it was a secret special task force essentially and I was just a stupid girl.

a lot of that fucked up my sense of self with my sexuality growing up too. I knew at a fairly early age that I was bisexual even though I didn't know there was a word for it, but I didn't want to admit to liking girls because that would mean my bullies were right about me, and if they were right about that then what if they were right about all the other horrible stuff they said about me being hideous, and gross, and weird?

because! if that was right too! a boy would never fall in love with me and have dance sex with me like Johnny and Baby do in Dirty Dancing! or would never save me from being sacrificed like Rick saves Evie in The Mummy! I'd be alone forever because boys would think I was big ugly butch with no value to them, and girls would think I was a predator and would always have to be on their guard to make sure I wasn't gawking and fawning over them. (and let's not even GET into how my religion fucked up my sense of morality about this. I have since grown out of it at least.)

every person I ever confessed to having a crush on has turned me down (mostly politely though, thank god) in my life except for one and a half. (one said they also liked someone else as much as they liked me, and since I had no self-esteem at 18 I was like "oh that's cool. let's date anyway." because I just wanted to have a boyfriend. that's the half.)

the other we kind of connected right away, whirlwind romance for me, but I don't think they ever quite felt the same way and that ended in an actual divorce anyway.

I've had three "relationships" my whole entire life and no more than that, and in my head i told myself thag was because I am fat, and ugly, and MASCULINE, no matter how hard I tried to be sweet and charming and pretty.

as I've aged I've learned about the systematic de-feminization of black women since all the way back to slavery times and shit and I won't claim to be an expert about that shit but it makes me cry that it's just ingrained into people's minds. it doesn't give us a single fighting chance from birth. it makes me feel like I'm going to be a lonely freak for the rest of my life because iowa is like one of the whitest places in the world, and my own internalized racism has convinced me all my life that I don't belong in black spaces because I'm not "authentic", I'm watered down. I've been called a half-breed and an oreo so many times.

I can't be black, I can't be white, I can't be a boy, I can't be a girl. I'm a copper penny in a jar full of nickels and dimes. I don't look the same, I'm not the same shape, and im not as shiny.

though I am attracted to women I have this OBSESSION with men, and to have a relationship with a man as PROOF. SOLID PROOF. that I am a valid woman, because there seems to be no other way for me to get the point across. and it's important for me to get the point across because I grew up with my business being the punchline, and curiosity of my peers, and the concern of my family. I couldn't exist without speculation from someone.

and then came a moment last year while I was at work, where a co-worker told me something that a person in another department who I did not get along with had told them. that I was a mean, jealous bitch who wanted them "out of the way" because they were getting too close to my friend that also worked at our store, and I was obsessed and in love with her and trying to stop a relationship from forming between the two of them. and it made me sick to my stomach. it was the thing I had been trying to steer clear from, from the moment I knew I was bisexual, but I hadn't tried hard enough. my anxiety shot through the roof. I had a panic attack. I broke down sobbing in the bathroom. this person was vengeful, I had nothing to do with them or that friend anymore, and I hadn't for months but they wanted to spread this rumor about me. and even if I truthfully denied it like I did, it didn't matter, because a person could take one look at me an think "you know, I can see that." because that's what people thought my entire fucking existence.

I cried off and on the rest of the day. I was too sick to eat dinner. I barely slept. and then I ended up puking what little food I had to eat that night anyway. I still barely ate the following few days I stayed home from work because I still felt so sick to my stomach with anxiety and at one point I got faint-ish when I had finally returned to work, and had to have help to get to the breakroom and force myself to eat. I bawled to my step-mother about it all, that I didn't feel comfortable at work anymore because it was just my words against theirs, and my bosses never held the person accountable for any of the other bullshit that they caused anyway.

it took me a VERY. long time to move past this incident. I think the only thing that ever ended up fully distracting me from it was covid and my uncle and my father's health both taking a turn for the worst last June. and even then, in between, I had such loooow moments. I self harmed and wrote mean notes to myself, stayed in bed for days. I wrote my own suicide note just to feel better, even though I knew I'd never do it. I was too chicken, but I just wanted to write it and pretend, just to release the depression pressure in my brain.

I've since been better for the most part. I know my parents love me and that I'm important to them, when just a few years ago I used to claim that I was an orphan because I was convinced that my father and my step-mother never cared to see me again because I was an ungrateful brat. I still get very lonely and long for a significant other but I'm kind of just coming to terms with the fact that unless I put myself out there, it won't happen, and im just too insecure to take the steps.

yesterday though, just for a second, out of nowhere, I thought about the claim that person had made about me even though the atmosphere at work has since changed, and things are patched up between me and my friend.

that gossiper is irrelevant now, but I couldn't help but have a little meltdown about it anyway because. like. apparently that's the vibe that I give off. because that's what everyone has said about me from day one of my life. and. I just. have to keep dealing with it. I'm stuck like this. and it sucks. and that little thought about it reminded me again.

[halorocks1214]

the law of relativity

AO3 Link

Word Count: 9963

Summary: The Law of Relativity states that each person will receive a series of problems (‘tests of initiation’) for the purpose of strengthening the ‘light’ within. We must consider each of these tests to be a challenge and remain connected to our hearts when proceeding to solve the problems. This law also teaches us to compare our problems to others’ problems and put everything into its proper perspective. No matter how bad we perceive our situation to be, there is always someone who is in a worse position. It is all relative

Previous Parts (in order): Alan | Virgil | You are here! | Gordon

WHY 👏🏼 CANT 👏🏼 I 👏🏼 WRITE 👏🏼 FICS 👏🏼 IN 👏🏼 MO 👏🏼 DER 👏🏼 RATION 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 also just bluuuergh. dont ask about this fic. part of it was written in a dark auditorium, another was written in a different state, another was written on a frickin bus, this fic has been places ill tell you what. half the time i think this is hot garbage and the other half i think its actually decent so im posting this while my head is in a good headspace and then promptly yeeting myself off the internet for a few hours to wait and see what happens. this series is becoming less of a canon divergence AU and more of a straight-up AU because of certain details im trying to worm in there buT IM TRYING MY BEST

thanks once more to @gumnut-logic, because of the length, this time i used three prompts, them being "What do you mean?", crease, and dream (and they werent even used that much sksksksk)

Warnings for both graphic and non-graphic depictions of violence, as well as mentions of torture and other PTSD/panic attack related stuff. I went deep with this one fellas

Orphan.

The word tasted dirty in his mouth.

He can still see the footage in the backs of his eyelids from when he watched it exactly one year ago. He was the only other (living) adult at the time in the family outside of Grandma, so he was permitted to see it. He remembered they originally didn’t want to show him, mainly because of his age, but Grandma was fierce, and she put one hell of an argument on the table.

One Scott refused to let fall through the cracks by breaking down. If only Grandma knew how he cried his eyes out and screamed to high heaven that night in the hotel room after essentially watching his father be blown to bloody smithereens then she was a goddamn saint for keeping it a secret. It made sense, she was the mother to his father. She had quite the line up of stories from Jeff’s childhood. Scott sensed the early-greying of his hair came from her, heh.

The rest of his family eventually saw it, of course, they did. Scott couldn’t shield them forever. What he will protect, selfishly he might add, was how angry he was at how much better they took it than he did. They cried, yes they did, but they never fully broke down like Scott did. Later in life, he wondered if it was jealousy: jealousy at not truly being able to let go. Whatever it was, he made sure to swallow it along with whatever alcohol he chose for the weekend.

Just add it to the ever-growing pile of shit he had to deal with. Nothing new.

Suddenly he’s 20 again and seated in a plane to be taken to his first stint in the Air Force. He said his goodbyes to Virgil, Gordon, and Alan back at home while Grandma and John metaphorically held his hand all the way to the airport. John was… quiet, more so than usual, but Grandma was stuck right in the middle between being a sobbing mess and ecstatic at the fine young man he’s become.

You’re just like your father. He would be proud.

Scott was secretly glad she never physically said it. It gave him plausible deniability in thinking that those words weren’t laced behind her big, bright, prideful eyes.

The first time went well, maybe even great. He stayed for a couple of months, did some flight tests, and while the training was brutal, boy did he learn a lot. When he came back home it was to a family slowly stitching itself back together. Grandma was a full-time house member, Virgil had taken up painting, Gordon talked about potentially going back to his swim meets, and while Alan was still as silent as ever, he was perkier than when Scott last saw him.

It would be on and off for the next few years: a couple of months at home, slowly and painfully taking over the role their father had (he can’t remember when he essentially received joint custody of his younger siblings with Grandma, but hey, he’s not complaining), then a couple of months out at the Air Force base where he slowly climbed up the ranking platform. He became skillful, perhaps too skillful. When he got his rank of Captain he felt it was less of an honor and more of something they owed him.

He was getting cocky. Never enough to be a danger to his fellow men, but enough to be somewhat of an occasional annoyance. Charles smacked him upside the head more than once. It felt like the world was right-side-up for once. Scott made many-a-calls to John and Virgil, the former enjoying his first few rotations up in space and the latter squarely in the middle of college. Gordon was being offered sponsorships to hell and back, and Alan was quietly getting along with the other kids at his school. Grandma was on welcoming duty for Kayo, who was taking her slot in the Tracy family with grace, though, a warning that their family would take custody of her if something were to happen to her parents would have been nice, Dad.

Of course, nothing ever goes right for their family for too long.

Orphan.

Age 24, it was supposed to be a simple retrieval mission of civilians. Scott was put in charge of his squad and then some. At night, they rolled-- well, flew out to get the job done. Scott can’t even remember the country anymore when minding his own business. Australia? Finland? Perhaps Bangladesh? There was a place John was insistent Scott never do rescues in, Virgil tended to agree, and the eldest unhealthily let them banish him from ever stepping foot there without argument. He could never remember the name off the top of his head until John’s familiar International Rescue, we have a situation rung out in the living room followed by the name of the country.

He would immediately forget it later, trauma too strong, too volatile, but the way his heart stopped and his head shattered and the way he felt ice water rush down his back was a good enough reason to quietly leave the room and let John delegate the job to one of his brothers. Sometimes John found him retching in the toilet halfway through the mission. He made sure to always mute Scott’s wrist communicator, even if it was never turned on in the first place.

The plane touched down. Orders sent the ground team out. But then the ground team took longer than estimated. Scott tensely waited where he was told to. It wasn’t the first mission that took a little longer than predicted and knowing humans, it surely wouldn’t be the last. Then, words mixed with heavy static came over the radio. H--p. Co-- ---7--. --nd ba---p --me--at--y.

Scott sat tensely in his seat, remembering his orders and suddenly hating them. Radio back to home if the mission goes south. Well, it didn’t look like they had the radio anymore. Still didn’t hurt to try at least. Scott spoke the familiar protocol that was ingrained into him when trying to call base. Dammit. Nothing. Probably some kind of blocker of sorts. Sitting up straight as a board, Scott looked through his options.

… He was in charge here. If something happened to his team the fault would lie squarely on his shoulders. Going against everything but his gut, he went out to help his squad. He can’t really remember what he exactly did anymore, but he does remember that it made a noise. Like a Looney Tunes scene: he flinched, froze, waited to see if anything or one heard, breathed a sigh of relief, and continued.

He eventually stumbled across one of his closest comrades, Arnold Brigeets. Yes, the name was ironic and half the reason he joined the force in the first place. The guy was one of the people that actually trained Scott and also seemed to be one of the few that was genuinely proud when Scott became a higher rank. It’s why Scott was more appreciative of Arnold than others, that, and well… Scott thought his fatherly abilities were good. The guy did have three kids back home.

Orphan.

Ducking down behind the cover his older friend was semi-situated behind, Scott watched as Arnold jumped at the intrusion before sighing. Scott had run into some enemies that he swiftly took down-- nothing too serious, he didn’t have the time or weapons for such an act, but they definitely would be out of it for a while-- so Arnold must have too on his way to find cover as well, hence why he was so on edge.

“Thank God,” Arnold wiped his forehead, “Glad to see you join us, kid.”

Scott was breathing heavily, but the grin he attempted was still there, “Y-Yeah, so what happened? More threats than we thought?”

Arnold shook his head, “Yes and no. There were a lot more baddies than we thought, but that’s because the civilians weren’t civilians. It’s a tr--”

Boom. The familiar sound of a gunshot.

Arnold fell over. Never got back up. Dropped like a rock in a lake, never to come up to the surface again.

Scott was so caught off guard he couldn’t react to the gun that swiftly beat him over the head, knocking him out cold. The only thing on his mind was oh fuck oh fuck I messed up I shouldn’t have come I wouldn’t have made any noise that way why did I--

They had him for roughly two weeks. Scott always thought the plotline in movies where the villain vehemently denied knowing any important information was dumb as hell. We’re not stupid. We wouldn’t go after someone if they didn’t know something.

The things they did hurt and no amount of I don’t fucking know anything! would help. Those two weeks were lost to Scott in a sea of pain and torment. The only thing he remembered was being captured, then waking up in a hospital drugged up to his gills with his superiors staring at him like he cured cancer.

“You saved the rest of your squad from sharing the same fate as the first half.”

“I-I did?”

“You betcha, son. I only wish I was there to see it! People be saying you were like an animal in how you took ‘em all down.”

Scott’s never remembered, and he wanted to keep it that way.

He was given the highest honors, even the chance to skip a couple of ranks to be at the same level as the big boys, but the night they were going to share the news to the golden boy himself, they found him in one of the bathrooms with a bloody hand and a mirror shattered with no hope of fixing it.

He was honorably discharged to a family that was so thankful he was home. Words like missing in action and POA never stopped haunting their nightmares. Scott was too, God, of course, he was, but sitting around and doing nothing was the last thing his traumatized mind wanted or maybe even needed. After doing what he considered to be the biggest fuck-up of his life, he needed to feel important.

This isn’t the first time he’ll say this and it surely won’t be the last: thank Christ for Grandma.

“You want me to take over?...”

“Yep, it’s about time Tracy Industries received a new pair of eyes. The Board certainly thinks so.”

“But… they’d rather have a crazy, PTSD-infected veteran over you?”

A rough pinch to his ear, “Hey now, don’t call yourself that,” the gentle motherly tone was back as soon as it left, “Besides, that crazy might exactly be what they want. Half of their argument is that I “don’t take enough risks.” They’re getting tired of listening to an old fart like me.”

A moment of contemplation, followed by the cheeky raise of an eyebrow, “So you’re saying you want me to take so many risks they have no choice but to take you back?”

A bark of laughter, “Damn straight.”

He learned the ropes faster than normal (healthy, is probably the correct term), and he immediately won the hearts of both young and old in the company. Instead of flying planes every few months, he worked on business reports and vetoed new ideas every couple of weeks. It felt satisfying for the most part, and his family was just happy he was still alive to enjoy it.

However, there was a slight roadblock on his way to becoming a somewhat stable person.

He became prone to violent blackouts. It had to have started when he blacked out and saved himself from those two weeks of hell, which made the most sense. Something was always destroyed when he came back to life. John was the best at calming him down due to his own experience with panic attacks, however, John couldn’t always be there, and the next rotation for NASA was coming swiftly. Scott swore up and down he would be fine, he could figure something out. John went back into space with an eyebrow permanently raised.

It was just him and Virgil home (Grandma had taken Alan and Kayo to watch Gordon swim) when he, unfortunately, proved John right. Scott wasn’t sure what triggered it, but he vividly remembered coming back in Virgil’s extremely tight hold. The first thing Scott thought to say was damn, beanstalk, when did you get so strong? but then he laid his eyes upon the forming bruise on his younger bro’s face and hasn’t recovered since.

Virgil swore he never held it against Scott. Scott definitely thought he should have.

That night brought sudden clarity to Scott that he was doing this horribly wrong. He was a ticking time bomb, and it wouldn’t be long before something was damaged in a way that couldn’t be fixed. Scott needed an anchor. Something to ground him before he took it too far. John wasn’t going to be earthside forever, Grandma was busy with Kayo, Alan was just a kid, and Gordon was living the dream. None of them were viable.

Then, as he was thinking, he was suddenly aware of how calming Virgil’s arms were around him, how they were preventing the growing panic attack in his chest from getting even bigger.

It was easy.

For once in Scott’s life, his eyes were big and young as he asked Virgil, “Help me, please.”

After a few brief seconds, Virgil gulped, “Okay.”

From then on, Virgil was Stone Number One. Scott’s admiration for Virgil outweighed the guilt of putting the black-haired man in that position in the first place. Virgil was glad to follow his older brother’s leadership, but just as qualified to bring him the hell back when he went too far. From getting too sacrificial to preventing a good punching-out some of the idiots they dealt with, Virgil made sure Scott knocked that shit off.

Time went on, Scott was a top-notch CEO at Tracy Industries, John was having one hell of a time up in space, Virgil was graduated and had so many life opportunities to pick from, Alan was thriving at being a (mostly) stable kid, Kayo was 100% acclimated to the family, and Gordon--

Scott found himself gripping the wooden desk very abruptly. He was shocked he didn’t snap a chunk off in the process. Why was he thinking about this right after a giant business conference? Who knows at this point. If this giant origin story seemed jagged and jumpy, maybe even somewhat vague, good, that’s how it fucking felt.

Back to said story.

Scott always thought he and Gordon would have the least amount in common.

They do, but out of all the things they could have picked to be similar, why did it have to be the PTSD caused by military-related jobs? Scott was 24 when he got his, Gordon was just under 20. It may have been a few years since their respective accidents, but they’re never going to go another day without it feeling like it was just yesterday.

At this point, Gordon was up and walking again, mainly thanks to John and Alan while Virgil and Scott helped in their own ways. Grandma’s cooking was what probably motivated him the most though, ha, the need to get away from it… Scott smiled. Grandma was always a constant. Honestly, if it weren’t for her, the family might have fallen apart. Literally.

What has he been saying throughout this whole shindig? Thank Christ for Grandma.

One day out of the blue, Grandma reserved the entire family (yes, even Kayo and Alan) private plane tickets so they could spend some time on the mainland for a few days. Honestly, even if the island wasn’t getting major renovations, you hooligans need to get out more. Have some fun. Try not to kill anything, especially each other, she all told them while creepily grinning. John and Virgil smacked Gordon more than once on the plane for insisting that she finally snapped, dudes, she’s gonna kill us.

Most of the time during their little vacation, Scott heavily focused on his breathing. He was pretty sure he knew what she was doing. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous, but the same went for his excitement.

Dad showed him these plans the day after his 18th birthday. You’re a man now, Scotty, I need your help making this big boy decision with me.

As soon as they reset foot down on the island, Scott took a deep breath and felt relaxed at the salty taste in the air. It was weird, nothing on the outside was changed, and yet… it still felt different.

“Guys!” Virgil yelled out, “Stop playing in the water! We just got back, aren’t you two tired?!”

Blinking back to reality, Scott looked over to see his two youngest brothers doing exactly what Virgil was yelling at them for. Poor Johnny was a little damp too, which is what probably caused Virgil to shout at them in the first place. The blondes didn’t care. They continued to prance around in the shallow waves with their pants legs rolled up, acting as if they didn’t hear anything outside of their laughter. Gordon shoved his hands down into the liquid and threw some directly at Alan, nailing him right in the face.

Scott exhaled slowly. He couldn’t imagine them doing this 8 years ago.

Regardless, the artist was right, and they couldn’t waste too much time. Kayo was swift in grabbing both gentlemen by the ears and dragging them onto dry land. They all painstakingly trekked their way up to the-- what would you call Tracy Island? Mansion? Over-blown cabin? Well, whatever it was, Scott would always be willing to call it home.

Stepping inside, each brother took in the view, which was underwhelmingly not that much different, except for one tiny thing. John suddenly noticed a figure already standing in the living room and blinked, “No way… it’s--”

Gordon jumped in, both with his body and his words, “Brains?! Dude, how’s it hanging?!”

The scientist in question jumped at the voices before clearing his throat and readjusting his glasses, “O-Oh, hello again, T-Tracys. It’s good to see you all once more.”

Virgil slung an arm around his shoulder, ignoring the blatant squawk, “Man, how long has it been?! What made you finally decide to crawl out of your hole?”

Snickers came from all corners of the house. Brains stood up straighter, “W-Well, I was contacted b-by Mrs. Tracy over here with an offer I c-couldn’t turn down.”

Eyebrows tilted in all shapes and sizes. Someone cleared their throat. Everyone turned to look at Grandma once again, “I think if you all follow me, you’ll swiftly understand what I’m talking about.”

I already do, Scott thought matter-of-factly. John seemed to be understanding it now, Virgil was on the cusp of remembering what his father was hinting at for him, and Gordon was just as lost as Alan. It made sense, Jeff talked to all of them about it, but the oldest had seniority. The two youngest not remembering just by words was expected, especially since that was going to be rectified very quickly.

The hangar under the island was beautiful. Point blank. It smelt of iron and steel and grease and engine and that was the first time since Scott had been in the Air Force that he didn’t gag or flinch at the thought of flying something again. Scott had seen the plans his father drew. He assumed Jeff finished building it, but he never got to physically see it since…

In some ways, he was glad he didn’t. Now he got to experience it with (most of) his family, and that made it ten times better.

After letting them absorb the scenery, Grandma slowly turned around to look at them all, “You remember that dream your father had?”

The four oldest blinked, Kayo simply raised her eyebrows, meanwhile, Alan, being the teenager he was, didn’t read the emotion in the room, “Oh, yeah! Aunt Casey always talked about how he was going to “change the world” and stuff. What did he call it again?”

Scott felt way more confident than he had in a while, “International Rescue.”

Grandma nodded, gleeful at the happy look on her oldest and youngest grandsons’ faces, “Well, I’ve been thinking about some things. I know we don’t exactly worry about money, but after everything your father put into these girls… I’d hate for them to go to waste.”

The Tracy family jumped at that. John’s mouth was wide open in shock, yes, shock, “That station is still up there?”

Grandma sighed, “You mean ‘Five? Not for long. Not if we don’t send someone up there within the next few days.”

John blushed at the grin Grandma gave him. Clearing his throat, his big brain came to a startling conclusion, “Wait… you brought Alan along?”

The other big brothers in the room jumped at that. Kayo was the only one with enough balls to say the truth out loud, “Mrs. Tracy, I mean no offense, but he’s--”

“Just a kid?” Grandma smirked, “A kid that’s topped the VR charts for Intergalactic Fury for weeks straight while simultaneously getting nothing but A’s in his classes?”

Scott nodded slowly in comprehension. He remembered Alan talking about that game for a while. It was some kind of online racing simulator of sorts. Scott caught the prettiest string of words from Alan when going to bed one night. Nearly made him shit his pants. He made the kid promise to keep it PG-13 if he wanted to keep playing.

Still, the elders in the family slowly turned to look at the freckled boy with both shock and pride. Alan blinked with wide-eyed innocence, “But my English class is only at a B--”

“Shh, kiddo, I’m making a point,” Grandma rolled her eyes. The other brothers snickered. Yep, still Alan. Grandma sighed, “Now before you point out that video games are different, I know, but the difference between them and this is that video games don’t have some of the most talented older brothers in the world to guide him.”

Said older brothers jumped at the idea. Before any objection could be made, Grandma continued, “Besides, the GDF seemed to be okay with it. The Colonel was willing to oversee some of his training too.”

John flinched at that, “But IR is supposed to be independent!”

Grandma slightly frowned. She didn’t exactly like it either, “It still is, but in the world of business, compromises have to be made.”

Virgil huffed and crossed his arms, “Well, that’s… rough. Here I thought only Scott would have to deal with the bullshit of business.”

Grandma chuckled at the somewhat un-Virgil-like behavior, “It really is, Virgil. But about that Scott part,” she slowly turned to look at him and him only, “I hate to give you more work to do, but if you want to work within their restrictions?”

Suddenly every pair of eyes in the room was on the head of the family. Gulping, Scott looked down at his feet to think. It was a tense few moments, nobody sure what he was going to decide, least of all him, before the brunette cleared his throat and brought his face back up with a grin.

“Well then,” Scott turned to look at the bright tip of ‘One, chest fluttering with a feeling that became unfamiliar to him over the past few years, “I guess now it’s time to state the obvious.”

From then on, every time he loaded into that cockpit of his girl, he felt lighter than air.

“Thunderbirds are GO!”

Everything was okay again.

Mostly.

Orphan.

Scott took another sip of his whiskey and refocused on his reports.

---

Scott was in some kind of dissociative state the whole way home.

Alan doesn’t deserve this. He’s still a kid, barely an adult, and he’s going to go through utter hell because you screwed up. You were 24, Gordon was just under 20, Alan was barely 18. Alan’s going to get fucked up like you and it’s all your fault.

His movements were robotic and rigid. Anyone with a working eye could tell he was deep in shock and running on autopilot. Mostly Jeff. Especially Jeff. The rest of the brothers all noticed too, but they were also running on their own empty fuel tanks, so the only thing they could do was guilty send their older brother the occasional glance of pity and concern.

Jeff was going to need to talk to them about that. Somehow. Maybe he shouldn’t be the one to point it out since he feels just as bad. His sons were too much like him, sometimes, and that made his guilt burn all the same. He should’ve been there to warn his sons about the dangers of unnecessary guilt. Having that kind of guilt was a parent’s job, dammit, and maybe grandparents only occasionally.

But then he remembered where he’s been for the past 8 years and… who really was Alan’s parents anymore? His gut was screaming it sure as hell isn’t you, but he knew his sons would want him to step back into the role as soon as he was physically fit to do so, not just for Alan, but for themselves as well. They would deny it, but they probably just wanted to be kids again too, even if it was only brief, fleeting moments.

Who was to tell the protective, fatherly side of Jeff no to that? No better time to fix things like the present after all.

He saw Scott go up the stairs when they first stepped into the living room, so that’s where Jeff was going to go too. Footsteps light, Jeff retraced his eldest’s pathway to his bedroom. Only, he stopped before said bedroom. Unfavorable noises were coming from the closed bathroom door, and Jeff could only swallow whatever emotion it made him feel. Taking a deep breath, he slowly opened the (unlocked) door to the bathroom and laid his eyes upon the incriminating scene.

Jeff was met with the sight of Scott retching his entire stomach into the toilet, hands aggressively grabbing his sticky, hair-gelled hair and trying to make himself bald from the strain.

Jeff’s reaction was always based on autopilot, and it will never stop being so.

Ignoring his protesting body, Jeff kneeled and placed a hand on his son’s back, only to abruptly pull back like he touched a hot stove when Scott only got more hysterical at the contact. The brunette clenched his eyes shut even more (and they were already shut as much as possible) while his head became a special kind of crease. Like he was in pain, “God, I wanna go home. Why won’t they listen I swear I’m telling the truth! Please, I just want Dad--”

Jeff was frozen on the spot, heart stopping in the process. His brain shut down while he watched his son continue to mindlessly ramble and panic. His freaked-out mind barely registered footsteps from behind in the hallway, followed by a voice going what’s going-- holy--

Something thundered past him. Blinking once, Jeff guiltily watched as Virgil kneeled behind the eldest and wrapped his arms around the thin man’s shoulders while taking Scott’s hands in his in a protective blanket, “Scott! Jesus-- we’re at home, you’re safe and it’s June 14th, 2--”

Scott only struggled more, panicking at the fact he could no longer yank his hair out. Dammit, it was the only way he could feel in control, don’t take that away too! “No! I swear I’ve said everything! Please--”

Virgil immediately knew that this was one of those attacks that Scott wasn’t coming back down from with pure human intervention. Add-on the sight of his father’s big eyes signifying the man was at a loss at what to do, Virgil had no choice. He snapped loudly, remembering the comms were still on and only feeling slightly bad at the way Scott flinched in his arms, “Shit-- John! It’s Scott! Get the stuff! We’re in the upstairs bathroom!”

Muffled footsteps through a few walls in the house could be heard. Jeff’s mind was only starting to catch up when the brother Virgil called for came rushing into the bathroom (Jeff never remembered it being big enough to hold four of them) and ignoring Jeff (practically shoving him out of the way too, man, this was bad) on his way to the main problem at hand. Landing on his knees in a way that made Jeff wince, John gently grabbed one of Scott’s arms from Virgil’s hold and subsequently pulled a needle from nowhere and injected something into Scott.

The response was instantaneous.

Scott’s breathing, while still labored, got slower. He stopped struggling as well, and the way he sagged reminded Jeff of ice melting into a puddle. The two other brothers’ shoulders also sagged, relieved at the crisis averted. John stood up, knees cracking as he rubbed the back of his neck. Then, he froze at the sight of something in the doorway, “G-Gordon…”

Virgil snapped his head up from where he was looking at Scott. Jeff did something similar. Yup, in the doorway was the strawberry blonde, eyes wide, making him younger by about 10 years. The ex-Olympian in question inhaled, closed his eyes, and soon speed-walked his way out of the entrance to the bathroom. Dammit, neither Gordon or Alan have seen something like that and it probably spooked him more than anything. He’d understand with his own PTSD-related issues, but still, seeing the “never weak” big brother freak out in such a scary way...

John combed a hand through his hair, shaking his head. As he started walking out of the room, he whispered to himself, probably hoping no one heard him, “Dammit, this is all so fucked…”

Unfortunately, Jeff did hear, and the dirty language made the father flinch. John was always the best about making sure Grandma didn’t wash his mouth out with soap, and the fact that he so willingly didn’t care meant that everyone was at the end of their rope. Still reeling at the sight, Jeff couldn’t react to the gentle arms that picked him up off the floor and slowly led him out of the suddenly stuffy room.

With the click of the door shutting, Jeff realized what Virgil did, “W-Wait, Scott--”

“Will be okay for a few seconds,” Virgil finished for his dad, “I know it’s nearly been a decade, but the one part of you I definitely know hasn’t changed is the need to comfort us, just like we hoped.” The small grin that fell over the middle child’s face put Jeff a little bit at ease, but Virgil wasn’t completely done, “So, I’m going to let you take care of this, but I just want to make sure you’ll handle it with grace. Take this slowly, okay? Scott might be doped up, but he’s still… volatile, in a sense.”

Jeff cleared his throat, suddenly choking on the unneeded tension, “Okay, Virgil, I promise, just… what happened? That was… bad, and really bad at that too. I know Scott would never let something that severe willingly come out in front of his family.”

Virgil rubbed the back of his neck, clearly not ready for this conversation, “Listen, Dad,” he inhaled sharply, cutting himself off before sighing in a way that said fuck it, might as well get this over with, “As much as it felt like it did, the world didn’t stop spinning because you… well, we had lives we somehow wanted to continue living. We all have lives and stories now, and this is Scott’s story to tell.”

Jeff was getting misty-eyed again. Back when he was just a kid, Virgil couldn’t keep a secret to save his life, mainly in part due to his insomnia-related issues (Jeff has to wonder if he still has them, more problems for the future) and general lack of filter because of sleep-deprivation. Now Jeff knew there was a starch difference between a kid who couldn’t keep his mouth shut and a man who genuinely knew how to respect another man’s privacy, but…

It just hammers home how much he’s missed with his boys. Gulping, Jeff made a mental note to talk with his mom about certain things he’s missed. She’ll know a lot more than he would, “Okay, Virge. Thank you, for stepping up there.”

Virgil’s shoulders relaxed at Jeff’s words, as well as his father’s hand patting him on the shoulder, “Thanks, Dad. Just… go easy on him. I know it’s a little late for this but none of us ever properly talked about things. It was very unhealthy, deep down we all knew that, but…”

“You just couldn’t get the proper emotions out?” Jeff finished for his son. At Virgil’s soft nod, Jeff exhaled, “I’m not going to say that it was a smart decision, but we’re all here now. We can move forward with this.” Jeff squeezed where his hand laid.

Virgil blinked before curtly going, “Yeah. Goodnight, Dad. Take care of Scott.”

Virgil stepped around his father and walked to where his bedroom most definitely was not, but Jeff could deal with that in a little bit. He had another son who he was pretty sure just had a violent PTSD attack of some kind, plus, Virgil seemed to sour at something Jeff said. The ex-astronaut wasn’t sure what it was, so he didn’t chase after him out of worry that--

Wait.

We’re all here now.

Dammit, Jeff. Out of all the sentences you could’ve picked...

Alrighty, just add that to the ever-growing pile of things that need to be talked about later. No biggie. Jeff found himself sighing and rubbing the back of his neck much like Virgil did a few minutes ago. Turning around, he was met with the bathroom door once more. Shaking his head, Jeff slowly crept into the room and saw that not much was different, especially with Scott.

His heart softly cracked, but, again, he can deal with it later.

Sitting down on the ground and grimacing at the way his body ached (was gravity always this rough?), Jeff leaned against the floor cabinets about 2-3 feet away from Scott, who made himself into a nice comfortable ball in the corner next to the toilet, his palm smushed against his forehead. Jeff waited a few seconds. Then minutes. Then he realized he would have to be the one to initiate the conversation. He probably should’ve realized that right when he came back in. He opened his mouth, but his wasn’t the one that words came out of.

“It was… Zambia.”

Jeff’s heart stopped and his mouth snapped shut. He couldn’t stop the way his eyes clearly showed his panic, but hopefully, he guiltily thought, Scott was a little too doped up to not realize it, “Scotty, what do you mean?”

Scott shrugged in a way that spoke he thought what he was admitting wasn’t a big deal. Yep, clearly not with it, “Mission went bad… caught for a couple of weeks.”

Jeff was hoping his first fuck back on Earth, spoken to himself like right now or otherwise, would have been a comedic thing, but the way nausea rose in his throat said this was anything but funny.

Scott wanted to be in the Air Force. Badly. Who was a father to deny his son’s want to be part of such a noble cause? He gave him tips, took him to meet friends in high places, sometimes even sparred with him when he turned 18, but then Jeff was suddenly thousands of miles away with no hope of ever having the chance of sparring with his eldest again. Despite it, Jeff hoped Scott went on to become the best pilot the world has ever seen.

Part of this looks like he did, but at what cost?

As much as it felt like it did, the world didn’t stop spinning because you… well, we had lives we somehow wanted to continue living.

Aw hell, “Jesus, Scott…” Jeff couldn’t tell if it was the brashness or the lack of a nickname that made Scott flinch and he hated it. He immediately softened his tone and brought his 27-year-old child into his arms, “Shh, shh, we’ll be okay. We’ll figure this out.”

Like father like son, old habits die hard, and as easy as it was to still be able to comfort his children, Scott seemed to just as easily take it as he used to 8 years ago, “Alan doesn’t deserve this kind of hell, God, he’s barely not a kid anymore! Why--”

Jeff tightened his hold to keep his son in reality, and because he didn’t like the tone behind those words, “Hey, you didn’t either--”

Scott somehow managed to fling himself out of the hug, focus incredibly on point for someone who was doped up to his eyelids five seconds ago, “But I fucked up! I made the wrong call and then suddenly Arnold was dead and he had a wife and kids-- shit, what the hell did I do?”

Okay.

First of all: way to put him back in that headspace when that’s the exact opposite you were going for, Jeff, father of the year. Second: dammit. Just… dammit. This was a big fat hand grenade in a giant handbasket that they didn’t have time to gently get out while simultaneously not yanking the pin clean off with the grace of a drunk elephant. Jeff was no stranger to Survivor’s Guilt, but there was a whole untapped pile of metaphorical C4 within his son’s head that was ready for someone to push the goddamn button.

He wanted it to be him, desperately, because it sounded like he already failed his family enough, it was all he could do at this point, but he absolutely hated that he couldn’t do it right now. This was going to take a lot of time, which they didn’t have, plus, Jeff thought he had a pretty good understanding of this new Scott and the rest of his kids. Jeff was aware that if he didn’t help his sons find their baby as fast as possible over everything else it’ll lead to a fate nobody wanted.

A shaky sigh, “Okay, Scotty, let’s get you to bed. We’ll talk strategy in the morning.”

Scott simply nodded as his father flung Scott’s arm around his broader shoulders and picked him up. Slowly and painfully but surely, father and son meandered their way to Scott’s room. With a thump a little harder than Jeff wanted, Scott flopped down on top of his sheets and immediately started snoring. Despite everything that just happened, the father couldn’t help but grin at the sight. Well, there was another thing Jeff gracefully passed onto his son.

Jeff only took Scott’s shoes off. He would’ve loved to pull the sheets up around him too, but the father didn’t want to take any chances at waking him up. Slowly tip-toeing out of the room, Jeff gave one last glance back at his son before finally letting him be and gently shutting the door. He had three other sons he needed to console, but his tired joints told him to selfishly take a moment for himself for right now unless he wanted to collapse and give his family more to deal with.

Jeff eventually made his way to his room-- which was sadly unkempt, he noticed-- and sat down on the edge of his unfamiliar bed to think.

He’ll figure something out. If he had to crawl through images of his son being brutally and bloodily tortured then by God he would with the fury of a thousand suns.

He was back and he wasn’t going to throw away any second or even third chance he was given.

---

“I got him.”

Virgil turned his comms back on, and with it, Scott’s heart restarted for the first time in a few weeks. Taking a moment for a breather, Scott leaned against the wall while practically wheezing. They have him back, holy shit, they have him back. Scott vaguely heard Gordon cry in pure relief and joy. He saw John’s side of the comms flutter for a bit before a bright flash happened. Blinking away the white spots, Scott looked at his wrist to see a fully detailed map of the compound.

Gordon spoke what they were all thinking, “Woohoo! First Allie comes back, then Johnny-boy gets us a free ticket out of here! We’re winning this race, baby!”

A very loud moment of silence. John cleared his throat, “Actually, I was going to say glad to see you in one piece, you little shit,” a playful gasp came from Virgil’s side. It was too high pitched to be from the pianist’s mouth. Scott chuckled, but the paranoid part of his brain said John wasn’t done. His brain was right, ‘“But guys… that wasn’t me. Or EOS. We still haven’t found a way to get past the metal they made these walls out of.”

That silence was even more deafening than the last, and before Virgil could utter out his typical what the fuck, a small logo appeared at the corner of their new map. One that was all too familiar. The Chaos Crew wasn’t the only one who could brand their awful deeds.

Son of a bitch.

Virgil’s order over the radio was meant for Alan, but Scott couldn’t help but listen to it too.

“Shit, Alan, you need to run.”

Making quick work of the compound once more, Scott, while booking it even quicker than last time, opened a private line between him and Gordon, “Hey, how would you feel if I said go help Virgil while I cover Alan?”

The first response was stuttering, which Scott expected, but then it was followed up by something completely out of left field for Gordon, “... Okay, just as long as you promise to bring Alan back in one piece.”

Part of Scott wanted to console Gordon, another was questioning why Gordon was so quick to give up, another wanted to say of course, I will, idiot, but the first part that made itself verbal was easy, “You know I will, buddy.”

Scott could physically picture Gordon’s tiny, little, somber nod clear as day, “Sounds good, captain. See you on the other side.”

With a click, Scott was back on the group comm. Suddenly remembering what exactly his job was, he pulled out the map so graciously given to them by The Hood. Looking at all the dots, one was heading towards a prone one (oh if that asshole did anything to Virgil…) while another one was heading right for Scott himself. Actually, in just a few seconds, right as Scott rounded the corner he would--

“Woah, look out there, Tigger!”

Yes, you heard that correctly: not tiger, Tigger. Tigger hadn’t been used since Alan was itty bitty. It always seemed like the kid had endless energy with the way he wouldn’t stop bounding off the walls and furniture. Even as a baby, Lucy had to sit with him for a few hours while he slept in his crib to make sure he would stay there. In fact, their mother gave Alan that nickname herself. She was quite the Winnie the Pooh fan, and the rest of the family figured it would be one of the ways they could keep her legacy alive for the tiny potato.

Wrapping his arms around said flailing potato, albeit much bigger than a baby, Scott thought he would collapse then and there. Alan was here, in his arms, and yeah, the sight of his dirty and somewhat ripped up IR uniform made him mad, but Scott, for once in his life, decided to focus on the here-and-now, aka his precious, alive little brother, who finally stopped struggling at the realization that hey, the person holding you is a good guy, time to turn off fight mode.

Smushing their foreheads together as much as possible, Scott desperately fought to keep the waterworks back, a smile from ear to ear hopefully taking whatever energy his tear ducts had, “You are getting such an ass beating when we get home, little bro.”

Alan jumped back with a look of What the hell?! What did I do now?!

Scott simply rolled his eyes, “Really? “Not important”? You graduated high school, tiny dude! That’s huge! You remember Gordon’s party, right?”

Alan’s mouth gaped before he closed it with slightly puffy cheeks. Those same cheeks tinged with a small blush. Alan wasn’t exactly expecting to be smothered so soon (well, he did cry his eyes out on Virgil’s shoulder, but that was different!). Shaking it off, Alan moved his hands rhythmically and rapidly, To be fair, we weren’t sure he was going to get one for a while.

Scott faltered a little bit at the ASL. Darn, he should’ve seen Alan’s lack of talking from a mile away. Scott carefully hid his disappointment from Alan. Lord knew what the kid would take it as, “Yeah, that’s what he got for barely making it. Imagine what you’re going to get!”

Scott assumed his semi-fake charm worked, as Alan seemed to play along without any kind of suspicion, Oh yeah. Fair enough.

This kid, man.

Then, slow clapping came from a dark corner, making Scott’s heart leap out of his throat as well as push Alan behind himself. Glaring as much as he could towards the invisible evil-doer, Scott didn’t have to think twice, “Alan, take my map and find Virgil and Gordon.”

The youngest looked like he was going to object.

“Go.”

He no longer did. Good.

Listening to the field commander’s orders, Scott felt his wristband slip off his wrist and a warm body leave his vicinity. An inhale. Also good. An exhale, followed by an even darker glare, “What more do you want?”

Short and straight-to-the-point and angry, two things Scott typically wasn’t. Regardless, like a cold gust of wind, footsteps started approaching him from the shadow. Once Scott saw the outline of a body, he tensed even more. Virgil would snap at him for clenching his jaw so much.

A dark chuckle reminded him of what was important. The voice that spoke reminded him of something completely different, “Now then, brother, let’s not be rude to each other!”

Scott’s pupils shrunk at the familiar sight of Gordon stepping towards him. Except it wasn’t Gordon, because Scott knew that Gordon knew better. He also knew Gordon didn’t cheekily smile like that, even after a prank, nor did he walk that straight. He always had a funny walk after WASP, and Gordon wore that fact like a badge of honor.

Oh no, Scott definitely knew who this was, “What the hell are you playing at?”

Fake-Gordon rolled his eyes, like it wasn’t obvious, “I mean if we want to go that route, why did kid insist you being in the military was the coolest thing he’d ever heard you do? Maybe I wouldn’t have been pressured into joining a branch myself in the end.”

Scott’s nostrils flared, and by God, his pupils might have actually slitted like a snake’s, or possibly even a dragon’s, “Excuse me?”

Scott blinked, and suddenly he was met by not-Virgil, “Plus, why was our conclusion after hearing a three-year-old wanting to see snow to go to a ski resort? It had to have been those big, selfish, beady eyes, right?”

“C’mon, Scotty, we gotta give you some kind of calming exercise. There’s going to come a time when neither me or John are going to be there.”

“Hmm… does yoga work?”

A snort, “Well, that’s not too bad of an idea. Maybe the person pissing you off will stop whatever they’re doing at the sight of you spontaneously doing downward dog.”

Laughter, an unfamiliar action, “Yeah, okay, but for real, those breathing exercises I’ve seen you do look okay. Let’s start there.”

Scott was not a liar by heart. He had to admit that those exercises were doing jack shit right about now.

Another blink, another brother. Familiar ginger hair was all Scott could see, “To continue that previous point, why did Dad start International Rescue again? And what led to his demise?”

“Sounds like a piece of work. Why do you keep dealing with these people again?”

“Someone has to pay the bills, Johnny. Grandma’s too focused on making the perfect poison for us.”

A roll of eyes, “Right, because the billions we have saved wouldn’t be enough to last a couple of families a few lifetimes. Glad to see your calming exercises are working at least. How’s that going for you, by the way?”

A pause. A flicker of vision around the room. Someone cleared their throat, probably himself, “It’s probably not as bad as whatever space is throwing at you. You handling it okay up there?”

Another pause, followed by a sigh, “Well, since you asked so nicely…”

Scott wanted to deflect the truth so badly right now more than anything else. Telling him he couldn’t pilot ‘One anymore would be a much more enticing option than what he was hearing.

Suddenly, Scott was looking in a mirror, “Besides, I know more than anybody that he wasn’t wanted. A mistake. I thought we Tracys hated being imperfect?”

The Hood must have known their backstories from internet articles, and being the mastermind he was, it probably took him all of three seconds to see Alan had some hidden self-worth issues. By playing the biggest Guess Who? game of all time, The Hood was most likely able to figure out some less-than-positive ideals Alan thought about himself throughout his childhood and danced circles around his already weakened mind to string together some spineless blame to put on the kid by sheer evilness alone.

Knowing his kid brother, it worked.

Scott wasn’t thinking straight-- maybe even at all when the first punch was thrown.

Just like that, Scott blacked out and was running on terminator mode. John would be disappointed. Virgil would be horrified. Gordon might find it funny. Alan wasn’t here, and thank God for that. Scott wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing. All his mind was telling him was make lots of pain hard and fast. His brain also blocked out any hit The Hood was giving him in return. Pain flared for a few seconds, then it was swept away in the puddle of rage his mind was currently being consumed in.

Soon, his out-of-it mind found its target and gripped his-- The Hood’s arm, no disguise would make him have an identity crisis, thank you very much-- nice and rough.

Scott heard the familiar snap of cartilage and felt only partially bad. If he was thinking more clearly, he would be disgusted with himself. Yes, even The Hood didn’t deserve this level of Scott’s fury. Oh, he definitely deserved to be hit by a truck, but not by Scott. It was mostly due to Scott’s sanity. If he could be this graphic and violent at all, even to the worse possible criminals, that meant he could be that way during other moments, and that was not a territory he wanted to cross into.

Welp, he was here now, and he’ll hate to admit it in the future, but the only thing that brought him out of it was a tiny gasp from a few feet away. Snapping his head up, Scott’s eyes landed squarely on a smaller-than-normal Alan, who was currently clutching his arm to his chest in an emotion Scott didn’t want to figure out at the moment. So much for going and finding Virgil and Gordon.

“Allie, help…” fake him grunted out, only making real Scott growl and tighten his hold (and probably making his case worse). Looking up from the person in his arms, Scott felt his heart split in two at the sight. There was fear and uncertainty in Alan’s blue eyes and boy did it hurt. Scott couldn’t tell if it was because even seeing a potentially-fake Scott being beaten up was bad or if it was because he’d never seen big brother be this brutal, even towards their enemies. Whatever the reason, it involved Scott being the main root of the problem.

Wait, that was The Hood’s plan. Shit… make Scott act past the point of no return in a way that was unfamiliar to Alan so the kid couldn’t be fully sure who was who, and Scott fell right into his trap, hook, line, and sinker.

Fuck.

Bloody well done, Scott, you absolute moron.

Scott faltered a little bit, “A-Alan, I--”

That falter was enough for The Hood to break an arm out of his grip and elbow him in the face. In the brief second of freedom he had, he tried dashing towards Alan, but Scott was too quick for everyone’s good and soon had the imposter back in his arms, both of them struggling in a way that made them look like they were tied into the weirdest knot in existence.

Then, an earthquake struck.

No, literally.

A big shake of the abandoned compound threw the look-a-likes about and subsequently off the platform they were on. The place was old; it didn’t take a lot of weight for that guard rail they made their way over towards while fighting to snap right off. With a yelp, the two of them gripped the edge as much as they could and held on. Crap, I know we talked with Fuse about potentially setting some stuff off, but--

Blinking, Scott saw a familiar mop of blonde hair come into view. Alan was rather panicked, clearly not sure which Scott was the real Scott. Not only that, he had little time to decide which one to save. Goodie, another reason to despise The Hood: not only has he put Alan through weeks of torment, now he’s forcing the kid to decide to either save his oldest brother and biggest hero or his personal torturer.

And Alan won’t know until he picks.

Holy hell, this was getting worse by the second. Hopefully, big brother charm can work its magic and get them the hell out of there.

“Alan, quickly, over here!”

“I can’t hold on for much longer, Alan, hurry!”

The two Scotts glared at one another in the exact same way, not making Alan’s job much easier. Another shake, another slip down the metal cliff, more screams, and Alan looked ready to tear his hair out. Scott watched as the kid looked around rapidly, probably praying for a miracle in the process. Suddenly, the kid jumped when he must have spotted something important. Within the blink of an eye, he was gone and out of their range of visions to retrieve it.

Whatever the hell he noticed better be important, because if just ended up wasting precious time then--

Another shake, probably the last one. Still, it was enough.

Both their grips gave away at the same time, screams identical (God, did he always sound that wimpy?) as they plummeted to their demises. Scott was briefly able to look up to see his brother pop his head over the cliff like a chipmunk again and grab the (albeit broken) arm of The Hood and save him. Dammit, Scott should have expected that, though, that display of anger was uncharacteristic to Alan. Probably terrified him even more than he already was. Fuck, Scott deser--

Suddenly, a rope wrapped itself around Scott’s left arm and stopped his descent. Hard. Hopefully, it was only torn stuff, they didn’t have time to deal with dislocation--

Wait.

Scott wasn’t dead if he could think about these kinds of things.

Blinking, he looked at his arm to see the familiar rope of his grappling hook around his forearm. Moving his eyesight to look past that, he saw the wide, blue eyes of his baby brother struggling to stay on top. The Hood was using his non-broken side to try and climb his way back up to safety. Huh, that’s weird. When did Alan get ahold of that? Scott must have dropped it during his scuffle with--

That’s when it hit Scott.

Alan saved them both.

Alan saved them both.

And it would be all for jack shit if Scott didn’t get his ass up there to help.

Panicking, Scott gripped the rope and started to ascend. He had two working arms and a smother complex to boot; it wasn’t long before he overtook a struggling Hood, who could only use one arm and a weakened brother (that bastard was so lucky Alan had a literal heart of gold).

Flinging his arms over the edge and pulling himself up-- and shrugging off the extra help Alan offered. Save your strength, baby bro-- Scott was in a much calmer search-and-destroy mode. He yanked his evil look-a-like up, turned him on his stomach, pinned him down, and before he could even watch Alan blink, “Sign something.”

There, now he watched Alan blink.

Scott pulled out one of his best ‘big brother’ smiles ever, “Tell me something in ASL. I don’t think The Hood learned that kind of etiquette.”

The body beneath him growled, making Alan jump and Scott tighten not only his hold but his glare. Further prove big brother’s point, why don’t cha? He lost the angry look immediately to grin at Alan once more, who seemed to be slowly getting the picture. With a gulp, the blonde slowly strung together a sentence that Scott had to laugh at, just a little bit.

Damn, could you teach me to fight like that, Scooter?

Nodding his head, Scott had to concede, “Sure. Consider it a graduation present.”

Alan blinked again, and the immense relief that washed over the boy’s shoulders would be enough to banish nightmares for at least a couple of days. Suddenly, The Hood’s disguise blinked out of existence, making both brothers jump that time. Scott didn’t falter in his grip, however. This man was going down right here and now, Scott thought darkly, staring at the prone body beneath his.

Scott saw Alan continue to sign out of the corner of his eye, You know you look like shit, right?

Scott chuckled. Alan was always able to put a smile on his face no matter the circumstances, “Yeah, well, kindred spirits, little bro.”

Scott was probably as pale as Alan was with such lack of sleep and food. Running on what was essentially a prolonged PTSD attack wasn’t healthy in the slightest, and no doubt whatever kind of bruises and scratches The Hood gave him didn’t help, however, seeing hope fill those deep-blue eyes when Alan learned he was truly being saved drowned everything out, including the way those freckles were getting lost in those eye bags.

Yeah, their entire family probably looked like shit, and the recovery process was going to be even shittier, but they were going to suffer through it together as a family would.

That made it all worth it.

Shuffling himself so one arm was free while the other kept The Hood pinned, Scott held it out towards Alan. The flinch the youngest made tore a hole in Scott’s heart that was only slightly patched when Alan leaned into the warmth and safety of his biggest bro. Long recovery process, remember? Regardless, Alan still took to the hug like a dehydrated zebra did a pond, and that was good enough for Scott.

The Hood groaned underneath them.

Yep, good enough.

[sarasfm]

Sarauniya “ Sara ” Davies, 24, pansexual, cisfemale, ISFP Enneagram 9w1; Pisces sun, Sagittarius moon, Pisces rising 1st year Advanced Encryption Major; did not go to a spy prep hs

Imma keep it real with you, chief, I have absolutely no idea what’s going on. I mean, obviously, I know what espionage is ; I’ve read books and articles, and I’ve seen Spy Kids and all the Charlies Angels and James Bond movies, but I genuinely think I need a minute to wrap my head around everything. Make that two weeks, because what’s this I hear about two murders ?  I literally just got sent here to be safe, I — I’m sorry, I’m freaking out. Give me five seconds, and we can start again, because I promise I can totally pretend this is all normal. @gallagherintro​

full name: sarauniya “ sara ” davies

dormitory room: 105

birthday: 20 march 1995

soundtrack: “ go gina ” by sza

favorite dish: efo riro

aesthetic:  when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of light reflecting from her earrings, eyeglasses perched on top of her head, and a caviar iphone always in her hands

Bio Points

her mom’s a nigerian baddie billionaire & her dad’s a soft academic brit

she grew up between london and abuja where their family’s business is based. it’s a trading enterprise, the largest industrial conglomerate in sub-saharan africa

she’s the eldest of three siblings, was raised to be prim & proper and groomed to run their family’s business. her family’s not pushy though and they’re really cool. very healthy dynamic so she doesn’t mind ; she loves her fam and would do it w a smile !

Coding is her Passion though. total dork. stayed up all the time just sleuthing and being an internet geek since she was a youngin’

loves education and is the type who would willingly stay in school to learn. has a degree in economics from harvard and was almost done with her mba when her littlest sister got abducted !  was it about business ? money ? who knows ! the sister’s fine now but her family sure is Scared especially since sara’s alone in the big bad united states

her mom made some calls and went “ gimbiya, look, u aint safe n we sorry. we’ll work something out to make sure u get ur mba degree somehow but shit is wild so we gotta get u somewhere near that’s safe asap. u like studying & ur a geek with computers right ? cool beans, go back to school & welcome to gallagher, babe ”

she enters gallagher in the middle of the spring semester very overwhelmed & inwardly ignoring how unhappy she is about having to be here bc she is not & does not want to be a spy. she just tryna distract herself by looking at this entire thing as a weird vacation where she can do stuff she wasn’t able to before because it’s literally detached from the world. she is mostly probably in way over her head, but let’s see ! 

Other Information

Nicknames: Sara (to everyone), gimbiya (to family, means princess in Hausa)

Languages: English (native), Hausa (native), Arabic (C1), French (B2)

Strengths: is money a strength ? also coding. and being the sweetest. and a general smartypants but that’s in a university setting & gallagher probably doesnt give a fuck

Relationship History: only has one (1) experience. ( well,,, 2 if a three-second drunken kiss w kass counts ) his name’s royce and they’ve known each other since their bougie secondary school back in britain. started dating at sixteen and went to harvard together. they’re long term as fuck. he’s like her best friend and their families adore the couple & each other. got engaged last september and sara broke it off before leaving for gallagher, oof. she deadass milked the opportunity but lbr she wasnt rlly Feeling It so she’s kinda glad for the ‘valid reason’ to appear bc it rlly wasn’t Love for sara so boy bye

Physical appearance: 1.76m, 55kg, long black hair, slim and toned build

Classes: GEN 105, GEN 206, AE 101, AT 101, PE 101

Personality

the sweetest. v charming & sensitive to others & curious about things. enthusiastic too ! loves adventures & is very passionate. queen of empathy. 

she’s not stuck up even tho she loaded. she doesnt rlly talk abt her family having 12B or the fact that she’s an ivy league girl, bc she’s just generally very uwu 

easily stressed and flustered and overwhelmed ! man, gallagher’s gonna shook this goddamn academic dork to her core for the love of god someone pls get the aed ready

rlly fun !!! can be a lil unpredictable bc it b lyk dat for rich girls. loves her independence which she hasn’t maximized bc of her ex fiancé & responsibilities but it’s chill so chill totally chill, no ounce of further longing exists in the crevices of this girl’s heart

she is so not good with confrontation and is so allergic to conflict ok. she will sweep discomfort under a rug and lie on it ‘til it’s flat which makes her a queen of repression & conforming

is she easily overwhelmed & stressed ? yes, but she’ll try not to show it so much. it’s all mostly an internal monologue so don’t underestimate her pls. she’s v smart and competent. can be so competitive ( albeit mostly inwardly ) and a boss ass business bitch like her business momma bc that’s what she’s been training for altho she is still generally a soft bab so ... yeah, if u would be so kind as to Estimate her, that’d be grand

she needs to always be on top of her game. maybe not the best in the class, but definitely pushes herself to be her best, so a lot of late nights studying & won’t settle for bad grades ever. gonna be rough in gallagher bc she is not spy material ok, she’s just a pretty rich geek behind a computer

just imagine her as the nice girl in ur ap classes who’s a lil awkward & just so happens to be super hot & stinking rich

Fun Facts

has a six-month old rescue pup named sooty ! who kinda looks like a sheparnese

has a tendency to ramble if she’s comfy w u enough or mayhaps if it’s too much man 

is v diligent w keeping a journal & does it everyday 

likes to dance ! not super good but she likes it. hits da clubs for dat shit 

is a lil instagram famous bc she’s a gorgeous rich harvard girl & all that jazz. queen of selfies & of looking hot but doesn’t actually get to play around rip ffff 

doesn’t drink much bc she is an extreme lightweight and 2 is her tap out limit

if she’s had more than 2 drinks, she is Very Honest but still very ramble-y 

she is physically active but mostly just runs and does yoga. knows very basic self-defense. is not sporty, definitely not a fighter, may god have mercy on her soul

isnt a virgin but is not sexually experienced lmao lbr she kinda Itching to get out there 

don’t ask me what her accent is because i have no clue it’s all over the place

Established Connections — just bc i think y’all would like to know

kassandra sutton — internet friends ! loves kass to bits. have known each other since sara was 14. when kass was 18, sara took her on a grad trip to montreal and became a lil lowkey into her. doesn’t help that kass drunk kissed her & doesn’t remember lmfao. poor sara told her then-bf & they had a lil fight but they made up bc sara didn’t talk to kass for months. eventually they became friends again & now sara’s in gallagher w no idea that kass is a mf sutton & honestly, my girl is just very shook w everything 

Possible Connections

crushes — she does not know how to flirt. she is ,,,, p pathetic tbh but a real heckin cutie. will be super nice to ur bab ok  

flirtationships — sara and i r gonna continue to keep it real w u chieves, her ex fiancé royce was vanilla and bland as fuck. can u believe she has not been single in a decade ? ? someone give her love & attention & fluster this soft innocent child. get her Experienced but also dont hurt her

enemies/angst !!! —  or maybe do ! maybe hurt her. maybe obliterate her. maybe smash her poor heart to pieces, because tbh i would love that.  so someone pls for the love all things holy and divine, someone hurt her !!!!

fwb — probably just one (1) bc she’s still a romantic ? and she’s probably gonna want something exclusive even if it’s no strings attached and will surely want to ,.,. get to know them a little bit more first ,,, at least ideally , idk , maybe impulse & thirst gets the better of her one of these days who knows lets find out !

friends !!! — sara will love u ok. she may be a lil easily flustered but she’s doesn’t rlly give up on ppl quickly. as i’ve said, queen of empathy. probs feels v sorry for majority of the gallagher & georgetown kids bc, .,.,., this environment just screams highkey Trauma to her and she’s valid bc she’s right

mentors !!! — she hates feeling dumb ok she Always has to be on top of her game, so u can bet ur ass after her first meetings in her classes she goes to ppl going “ hey could u help me out w working out ? boxing ? firing a gun ? literally everything & anything ? ”   

anything & everything — meaning just come @ me & let’s talk about it uwu 

( did i just create georgina’s antithesis ? fuck yes, and i am sooo excited to have a child that’s not always plotting & scheming & being mean like y’all have no idea ;_; nywy, that was long bc shutting up and brevity are things i do not possess. whats up it’s ur og flower garden girl rose here aka bugleweed aka fiancée of many and lover of all, and i am open to anything and everything ! just drop an IM or hit dat like & ill slide in ur dmz w love, plots & sanitized hands x )

[rockettransman]

Rocketman Watch #4 Thoughts

i have so many MORE thoughts can you believe it wow here we go

(i wrote these as i watched it so they’re in order im p sure)

man, his intro monologue during group therapy is just as gripping as it was when I first watched it. And the transition to the bitch is back is so fuckin good. My palms are sweating.

There’s some commentary about forgiving and loving your inner/past child, but I don’t have the words for it at this moment. In the beginning he’s staring down, confused and scowling at his child self, but at the end, he embraces him in a way his father and loved ones never did.

Was he in therapy/rehab WHILE touring and doing music? Stomping into the room in his regalia would have me believe so. I know group therapy was a medium for storytelling. Was it just signaling the very beginning of his story, because we go through different stages through his actions and clothing changes?

Lmao I imagine it must take some pretty cool parents to allow their, like, six or seven year old child to be in this movie. He said bitch so many times.

Took me a hot second to realize the orchestra he’s conducting is playing Rocket Man. The violins are so pretty. Imagine being picked to be in the orchestra on set and getting smile up at the tiny little kid who played Elton. My heart would absolutely swell seeing a little kid being so fantastic at this really intense job.

Kit Connor did amazing in his role. He’s fifteen and he’s already done so much! Imagine growing up knowing you played Elton John as a kid. Getting to work alongside him and his husband and the dozens of incredible actors. Wowie. I’d never shut up about it.

I LOVE how 12 year old Elton is playing the piano SO HARD and is trying to rock out as hard as he can while playing classical music. The boy wanna ROCK dammit.

HE GLANCED UP THE TINIEST BIT WHEN THE MAN ASKED IF ANYONE HAD A FAG (slang for cigarette)

SATURDAY NIGHTS ALRIGHT GIVES ME CONSTANT CHILLS FROM THE START TO FINISH

WOOOW SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD ELTON IS CUTE AS HEEELLLL. The hair, glasses, and front tooth gap fit Taron so well. Goddamn I hope I look like 17 year old Elton some day.

The choreography for this number is absolutely breathtaking. You have to get that many people all in sync! We followed Elton running through the crowd and AAHHH it was a lot! The athleticism! And they did it in the rain! Wow I’m blow away.

Elton is JAMMIN in the back of the stage. It’s really sweet to see his smile and enthusiasm and his brain thinking and working.

That guy in the back peed a LOT lmao

I was wondering where thank you for all of your loving came in.

Charlie Rowe plays Ray Williams, and he also plays LEO ROTH from Red Band Society!!! The first time I watched the movie, I KNEW him from somewhere, but I couldn’t place it and it was driving me nuts. Man. RBS was a big crutch during the worst lows of my ED. Had no idea he was English.

Love to see how shy Elton was as a teenager. It’s a hot ass mood. Also, those silk scarves? Ascots? idk but they’re a LOOK.

“One frothy coffee, no froth.”

The acquaintances-to-best-friends montage set to Border Song *chefs kiss*

Rock And Roll Madonna Is A Perfect Song Send Tweet

Lmao Elton is NOT phased at all when he gets accused of being gay. He’s just like. “Nah. I’m like. Not.” Not overly defensive and surprised, like I’m sure other people would be lmaooo

STUMBLING HOME DRUNK WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND IS A MILESTONE IN TEENAGEHOOD!!!!!!!

“You are a ssSSHHIIIITT HOT piano player—”

So delicate of Bernie the way he politely denied a kiss from him. It wasn’t weird or tense at all. Just a gentle “love you, but not that way. It’s okay” Some people may not be able to handle it that well even today.

Taron’s got nice thighs. That robe & underwear getup is a nice look.

Love love LOVE hearing him experiment with Your Song on the piano to find a melody that worked.

Honestly what the shit do these songs even mean. Bernie sometimes these words don’t make any sense. Don’t worry, they still slap. “See I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue” like what

AMOREENA IS A PERFECT SONG SEND TWEET

Doug flirting with Bernie makes me snort every time. “Oh, really? That’s.. cool.”

THE TROUBADOUR OUTFIT IS GOOD AS SHIT!!!!!!!!

“NO, BERNIE. YOU ARE UNDERREACTING.”

Taron was right. The overalls do make his ass look massive.

A week ago before this movie I was sick and fuckin TIRED of crocodile rock but now I can’t get enough of it. The movie transformed a lot of old songs I was sick of for me.

Imagine being a kind of shy, nervous kid, terrified to go on stage, but two and a half minutes later the entire venue is LOSING IT because they love the jam YOU WROTE. how cool for Elton.

I want a best friend platonic cheek kiss :(

Hmmmmm I’m wondering if they used the studio recordings that went on the album for the movie or have different movie-specific recordings. Tiny Dancer sounds a teeny bit different in the movie version.

Goddamn I sure hope Taron got to keep that jacket.

“So you liked the song, then?” “Not as much as the singer” *Elton glances away in gay panic*

LMFAO John said some weird colorful words to Elton that barely made sense and he was like OH FUCK GOTTA KISS HIM GOTTA KISS HIM

I’ve talked so much about the sex scene I don’t need to go on about it here. Go search the rocketman tag on my blog for my extensive gay thoughts about it.

Now I know glasses come OFF during sex

oh oh oh I was wondering where Hercules fell in the movie. I love how the songs he’s writing or getting notoriety for is played over the transition scenes.

Elton’s hand on his hip, knowing smirk as John enters the studio. “Hello.”

Bernie is like “HELLO are we RECORDING or are y’all gonna FUCK in the CLOSET?”

*vibrating* Honky Cat Honky Cat Honky Cat Honky Cat

Damn, the flowy white button down with the red pants really is a LOOK

The gestures, staring up at each other, leaning into each other, hands on each other’s chests, damn it makes me feel some typa way. Maybe their love WAS good and fun and exciting while they rode the high of everything before it all went so so bad.

Elton searching John’s gaze while he’s talking and looking like he’s not really paying attention, just looking for a kiss on the couch.. GOD I remember the honeymoon phase of my relationships. So much fun.

His dad going “N-Not really my thing.” That was a metaphor for his SEXUALITY TOO, huh.

Damn. He went to his dad’s to come out to him and he never even got to get to that part. He was just like “....nice shoes....” and even after all this time, didn’t show any interest in his music. If he never was into what he did, how could he even talk about being gay? I’m sure during that scene there were a lot of metaphors to sexuality but I didn’t bother to think much about them.

The eyebrow quirk after his dad says “ah—no. Could you make it out to Arthur?” DAMN Elton was like .. “really. This is what’s happening? Okay. Awesome.”

“What do you have to do to get a fucking drink around here, eh?” *cuts to Elton drinking straight from a bottle*

“Elton—” “Elton!”

John saying “don’t you ever put your hands on me” when he was the one who yanked him from the phone booth AND directly after punching him... woof man. What a shitty dude.

Damn, just noticed John talking very quietly and closely to another man right before he goes on and plays Pinball Wizard. Was this the first sign of him having fun with other men when Elton was indisposed?

Pinball Wizard is absolutely intense and loud and fun, but it DOES carry the tone of “god im SO miserable” under it all. You knew Elton wasn’t having fun.

“It is next week.” Jeezus.

LMAO I just caught the “mom, you’re ON my GOWN” when he reluctantly complies to give the Anderson’s a tour.

Damn, flowy, loose dress shirts with the first few buttons undone is a LOOOOK.

How did they do the overdose scene, you think? Surely the pills Taron took had to be like. Empty. Or placebo affect drugs? Idk. He did take a big drink directly after stuffing his mouth with them. I don’t think he spit them out.

God, there is SOMETHING symbolic about how he meets his child self at the bottom of the pool. Rock bottom? Apologizing? Wishing he could be better? Telling him he’ll never be better?

OH I watched a behind the scenes cut about the pool scene, and none of it was CGI. Taron was weighted under his robe and a SCUBA diver was on standby to provide oxygen. The singing and bubbles coming out of his mouth and stuff underwater was all real.

Dying to know about the choreography around the second chorus, about the undressing and twirling and dressing and injection and handing off of the bat and stuff. That sequence was incredible.

Bennie and the Jets. Damn. It fucks. I listened to it almost the entire time on my run today. (Five miles; I felt like garbage the entire time but it was good anyway.) The scene is wild. He’s in the middle of a drug induced haze orgy. He SHOULD be having the time of his life but he’s so goddamn miserable. (Also, the juxtaposition between Chris Fleming’s Bennie and the Jets is so funny.)

Part of the problem was that John never understood Elton. But, Elton broke it off with John, not the other way around like he said it was. He wasn’t the victim in that regard. John did treat him like shit though.

Victim of Love plays right after that lmao

Renate and he aren’t even close when they do the duet to don’t let the sun go down on me. They’re separated in different rooms, mirroring literally how closed off their relationship was.

The shot with them waking up in different rooms.. damn

His shirt is so LOUD I’m going crazy

Watching Taron down that orange juice made me a little nauseous I gotta say

“Not really I’m gAy”

It’s CRAZY to watch Elton and his mom interact at the dinner scene. He gets accosted and accused of so much by his mom, claiming SHE’S the victim of his actions, making it all about HER and then he turns around and does and says the exact same shit to Bernie.

He yells “Oh, don’t be so dramatic!” at Bernie as he gets into a taxi. THE PROJECTION!! THE DEFLECTION!!!!

I know there’s only so much they can put in two hours, but I wish they showed more of Elton’s eating issues. He had bulimia for sixteen years before he got help. It’s Absolutely the Man With Anorexia in me, but seeing that even men deal with eating disorders quells the lonely aching something in me. I feel that much less alone, you know. Eating disorders aren’t a “woman’s disease.”

How do you think they did his hair? A wig adds more hair, not take it away. He didn’t get his hair cut for it did he?

Seeing Elton’s first love fall apart because John was such a selfish, heartless prick in reality makes me sad.

Elton hugs his inner child when he reconciled with everyone in his past. Goddamn. He found peace and forgiveness for himself, who he was, even after all that time.

When Elton asks him not to go, Bernie refuses, saying this is something he had to do on his own. Healing comes from within alone. No one can help you do it. People can guide you, but you have to work at it. It’s fucking lonely sometimes, but it’s so, so worth it.

I used to loathe I’m Still Standing since i heard it so much at work, but the movie changed my entire perspective on it. I love the slow build up as he exits the rehab center. You don’t get thrown into something so happy and fast paced and fun after a cathartic climax you need to drink in. And the pan to his hat with the rainbow stripe to his smile. I get chills every time. Elton feels so right and secure and happy in himself. At first I thought it was a bit cheesy, but accepting your sexuality, especially after all the hell he went through during his life, grappling with unresolved trauma and fear of abandonment, he absolutely should wear it loud and proud. It’s easy to think times are much easier now being gay, and it shouldn’t be such a big deal. Relative to 1975, it is easier. But it doesn’t mean it’s not such a rough personal thing to work through if you’ve been spit on and resented all your life. Being gay, coming out, and accepting and being comfortable with that fact must’ve been such a HUGE milestone in Elton’s recovery and self-esteem.

Love me again after I’m still standing is perfect. The credits make me tear up every time. Jeez. What a good movie. What a good movie. Hit me up if you wanna talk about Rocketman because I absolutely will with you.

[neuropathicgypsy]

Matt's all: sometimes we would lock her in the house and not let her play with us

Me: the would hold the doors closed

Matt: or tie them shut

Me: I told you how to tie them

Matt: yeah we used bungees until she almost killed the stereo cause we hooked it to the 3 foot tall speaker and she broke out and she nearly tore down the wall entertainment center which took up the entire wall at age four -.-

Me: I'm a strong girl

Matt: but usually she didn't want to go out because it was too hot she liked to go out at sunset and ride her bike or swim but that was mostly it.. Swing but she said it was far.. That was before we started hanging out with the drug dealer. -.- only her. Otherwise she would tell on us for hanging out with the "cool" kids because they were bad influences because mom -.- said not to and mom knew to ask because sabrina is always honest. So we would lock her in. Now we call it the Hannibal Lecture cage

Me: you and Alex shared a bedroom with me so that's also all about you. You're lucky i let y'all out

Matt: we escaped

Me: that reminds me i just bought some new lotion. Brother do you mind?

Matt: nooooooooo

Me: :D soooo

Tony P: yeah because you didn't want any girl diseases

Matt: yeah ah man. She used to pee the bed!

Me: that was you

Alex: that was Alex!

Me: no it was one of the babies... Im sure we all peed at least twice. Annabelle has peed less than 10 times her whole life.. but Matt was the nutrient thief, all the time in the womb he was all taking all the room "i got a Dick. I don't want it to touch you. I need more space" and "I'm the boy i need this protein" and then there's tiny little me all frail and barely surviving.

Matt: but you got all the brains

Me: so you pretend! So i don't get ruley made at you! Nutrient Theif!

Matt: take a vitamin!

Me: I got some last night

Matt: one a day? For women

Me: i take two because my body is starved all it's life.

Matt: that's why you're fat you need all those nutrients and you can't get enough even if all you ate was vegetables you would starve forever muhahahah. Jack Spratt could eat no fat and his twin could eat no lean so then he locked her in a Hannibal lecture house and became super rich and laughed. That would be me.

Me: yeah I see that. Looking a lot like Jesse number 2

Jesse 3: I'm number 3 she killed number 2 in 1999

Jesse 1 nods

Me: yeah well

Jesse 3: you know you beat him with a chain? And it broke

Me: it was a big ass tow chain, thick. I could barely fit my hand around it and it was so cold it burned my hand. So what's your point.

Jesse 3: well he's dead

Me: hes certainly not alive then

Jesse 3: you're planning deaths better now, they've become more interesting

Me: i have a lot of pent up detestment. I like more graphic and mess now. Like my life all over the fucking walls and street. It makes me feel less stress to imagine it than just a simple beating... More complexity of a psycho you are, the more torture you deserve. Don't you want to see What you do to people? I want to show you

Jesse 3: do you still want to drag me behind a truck on a chain? I mean your mom

Me: my mom's dead already. That's dumb. Shes just bones. So no. I would like to keep her bones in a shelf. Or maybe in my bag and carry her femur and beat people to death with it.., or you know.., just use it as a cast to make an iron leg... Lol... Make a solid iron ball from her skull casting and use it as a baseball and throw it and hit it with the femur bat to cannon,shot people

Matt: this is Why Sabrina had to quit hanging out with the queen. They were about to start an army that used dead people as weapons

The queen: Just the good ones!

Jesse 3: what's your deal with the femur?

Me: I told my brothers that I was special and had a femur and they didn't because they were all about the Penis club and wouldn't let me in. And tried to kick me out my room and make me live with Alissa in the living room. And because Alissa is stupid as a boy I had to move back in my room because they were all part of the no femur club. So there. My mom told me to anyway because i was gonna kill Alissa

Matt: yeah! She wouldn't let you sleep on the couch so you would creep up on her and poke her and lift her eyelids and you used a butcher knife to lift her blanket off her!

Me: she told me not to touch her and Alissa left knives all over the Goddam house. It was right next to her pillow what was i supposed to do? Go up the stairs in the dark and get a spoon? And then go down? For a spoon? The knife i think had a much better effect. And she let me lay on the couch.

Matt: I give up

Me: and so then mom and Alissa went to the pornography store in Alabama and bought me a penis and i became the ruler of the free world most especially the Penis club and i got to sleep with mom and dad and in my own room and the Penis closed the toilet lid which was what started the whole war, me being out numbered with the whole toilet seat up and drowning in my half sleep nightly and i had to dress the Penis in a Barbie dress when we went out in public and then y'all all quit cause you were jealous of me and you still don't have femers.

Matt: oh! I don't! I don't!?!

Alex: you got all mad!!!

Me: so its still named after me

Matt: after FEmales.

Me: the femur only gets the girl part!

Matt: and one M so i get half.

Me: 1/5

Matt: that's 20%

Me: that's a lot less than half.

[grailbot143]

Our belated celebration of 64 followers!

Here is the second installment of SUDnD to celbrate one of the milestones we defined in the beginning. It has actually been a bit since we hit this milestone, but I was preoccupied. . .

I want to thank loreweaver, alvinnobody and delicious-anomalocaris for all the reblogs and thanks to everyone who comes back each week and reads and likes the stuff. Thanks to daiskken for the continued conversations each week.

Campaign: Crystal Gems

Session 2: Laser Light Cannon

MotelCalifornia: Alright, so Steven and Amethyst have decided to go to the fry shop while Pearl and Garnet stay on the Beach near the Temple? We’ll follow Steven and Amethyst for now. Fryman is in the store right now.

ShieldsNRoses: Hey, Fryman, give me the bits!

MotelCalifornia: It’s kinda late, so the shop is closed right now.

MotelCalifornia: Oh, uh he gestures to the closed sign and says *Fryman* Steven! We’re closed.

ShieldsNRoses: D: Aww, what?

AwesomeSaucem: imma beat on the counter Give 'em the bits! The bits, the bits...

ShieldsNRoses: The BITS! The BITS! The BITS!

MotelCalifornia: *Fryman* Okay, okay! Take it easy on the counter, will ya?

ShieldsNRoses: Yes!

AwesomeSaucem: Yes!

MotelCalifornia: He gives you the fry bits. They’re even more burnt than usual. I can give you actual fries if you want.

ShieldsNRoses: Just the bits, please. Thanks. @awesomesaucem Did we want to get anything else?

AwesomeSaucem: nah we dont need anything we head back to the beach

MotelCalifornia: Cool on your way back, you guys see two suns in the sky

Pearlescence: Two suns? I thought you said this world was basically Earth. A planet with two suns wouldn’t be anything like Earth.

MotelCalifornia: I’ll explain in a bit Let’s get everyone together first. But one of them seems to be getting bigger and the other one is setting

AwesomeSaucem: as were walking i wanna munch on stevens bits

ShieldsNRoses: have at it. Ah, sunset, my favorite time of day. When the sun goes down, and the second sun gets bigger and bigger in the sky.

AwesomeSaucem: lol Yeah, that big hot second sun

MotelCalifornia: You notice the second sun has a red eye

AwesomeSaucem: oh man not again!!!!!!! oh no, what is that doing here?

ShieldsNRoses: What is it?

AwesomeSaucem: I don’t wanna explain this I carry him to the others

ShieldsNRoses: Ah, my bits! *Rolls low*

Motel California: It was in your inventory, Shields, you didn’t have to. . . ah, never mind. We’re going back to Garnet and Pearl until you get to the beach.

STELLA: This is bad.

Pearlescence: I’m looking through the telescope. I want to roll to see how much I can remember about the red eye. *Rolls 10*

MotelCalifornia: It’s bigger than you remember, but you know it will likely crash into the city and kill people, including you.

Pearlescence: Look at the size of it, I had no idea these things were so big!

MotelCalifornia: Steven and Amethyst approach Pearl and Garnet on the beach.

AwesomeSaucem: still runnin and ive still got steven and im just yelling really loud Garnet! Pearl!

Pearlescence: I’m very angry that you guys weren’t with us when this all started. We saw. Some of us are trying to protect humanity. Where were you?

AwesomeSaucem: I put steven down Eating fry bits.

Pearlescence: Ugh

ShieldsNRoses: I wanna look through the telescope Oh, can I see? I see a giant eyeball Woah. It's a giant eyeball! Awesome!

Pearlescence: NOT awesome! It's a Red Eye!

ShieldsNRoses: A Red Eye?! It’s going to infect us all!

STELLA: That’s pink eye, Steven.

AwesomeSaucem: lmfao

Pearlescence: It’s going to crash into Beach City and crush us, along with a bunch of oblivious, innocent people! We have to stop it.

ShieldsNRoses: What are we going to do?

STELLA: The only thing powerful enough to destroy it is a Light Cannon that belonged to Rose Quartz.

ShieldsNRoses: My mom?

AwesomeSaucem: *ugh* if rose were here this would be so easy

Pearlescence: I know, but she’s not, and the cannon is missing. We’ll have to find another solution.

ShieldsNRoses: If it belonged to my mom, I bet my dad knows where it is. He can help us save the day!

Pearlescence: . . .

Amethyst: yea seriously

ShieldsNRoses: Huh? Eah?!

MotelCalifornia: Shields we hhavent decided your dads charatcer yet. I was hoping to bring him in later…

ShieldsNRoses: Well… why don’t we just make him like you? He’d be a perfect dad character

Pearlescence: Steven, he is your dad.

ShieldsNRoses: Exactly!

Pearlescence: I speak in a slow sweet voice: Greg is... nice, Steven, but I doubt Rose would entrust someone like him with such a powerful weapon.

MotelCalifornia: um

AwesomeSaucem: Your dad is kind of a mess, Steven.

MotelCalifornia: UM

Pearlescence: AMETHYST! You calling someone a mess makes it seem a little extreme…

AwesomeSaucem: I’m just sayin’, even if she did leave it with him, he probably broke it, or lost it, or dropped it in the ocean by now.

STELLA: TRUE

MotelCalifornia: Stella no not you too

ShieldsNRoses: Cmon guys No way, I’m sure he’s just keeping it somewhere safe. I’ll go ask him.

STELLA: WE CAN HANDLE THIS, STEVEN.

AwesomeSaucem: were way higher level than last time we can totally do this I bet that garnet could just throw me and it would beat it

STELLA: READY?

AwesomeSaucem: woah rly? HELLz ya lets do this

MotelCalifornia: Alright then roll for strength

STELLA: 19

MotelCalifornia: You pick up Amethyst and launch her at high speed directly at the redeyee. She makes it and it makes a neat thump when she bounces right off.

AwesomeSaucem: rly? with a 19? I bet a crit would knock it out of the sky we gotta keep trying

STELLA: OK

ShieldsNRoses: Uh, I’m gonna go. I head to town.

Pearlescence: (half-heartedly) ... Okay, good luck.

ShieldsNRoses: I’m banging on my dad’s van doors Dad, it’s me! Dad, are you in there? Wake up! We have to save... the— WORLD!

ShieldsNRoses: I climb on th van Dad! I think the van is like a mystry machine except more like ashtroids and shootin stars and planets

ShieldsNRoses: and a purple and white Mr. Universe real big on the side

MotelCalifornia: hm, you trip on top of the van and set off a car alarm

ShieldsNRoses: :)

MotelCalifornia: Greg bursts out of the van with a waffle iron *Greg* Who’s there? I have a waffle iron!

ShieldsNRoses: Dad, it’s me!

MotelCalifornia: Greg looks on top of the van. *Greg:* Steven? I almost waffled your face! What are you doing up so late?

ShieldsNRoses: whatdya meen? the sun just went down like an our ago

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Oh, heh. It was a... slow day at the car wash. Anyway, what’s up? Just needed to see your old man, pal around, learn some lessons about life?_

ShieldsNRoses: NO!!! I need the lite cannon that belonged to mom to blow up that eyeball

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Eyeball?

ShieldsNRoses: *pointing at it* that!!!

AwesomeSaucem: just as greg is looking at it he sees me flyin up and smack into it Raaaah!!!

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Wait, is that a magical thing? The Gems told me not to get involved with magic stuff. It... it could be dangerous or interfere with what’s left of my hair. Greg rubs his long luscious hair.

AwesomeSaucem: lol. . . long lushus hair cept the bald part on top

ShieldsNRoses: But they need Mom’s cannon. You've gotta know where it is, like a cave dungeon or a cloud fortress, or in a clam at the bottom of the ocean!

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Well, I don’t know about all that but I have an idea where it might be.

ShieldsNRoses: A magical storage unit!

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Ha, not exactly. But some would say there’s magic inside. *winks at Steven* It’s just a shed I use to keep things that don’t fit in the van. If it’s anywhere, it’ll be in here. Greg opens the door and reveals a shed a well organized shed.

Pearlescence: I hope you don’t mean as well organized as your actual shed.

AwesomeSaucem: lol ya just pakced top to botom w/ junk

ShieldsNRoses: if imma go in there Imma gonna need some gear.

MotelCalifornia: It’s not junk. I save everything for a reason! There’s some really important stuff in there!

MotelCalifornia: umm, I mean Greg has a reason for everything he saves.

ShieldsNRoses: I tie a flash lite to my head with a sok and elecktric cord around waste here I go

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Good luck!

ShieldsNRoses: I crawl in on my hands and knees woa, cool! Its like a dad museum.

AwesomeSaucem: see that pic of the cat with the ball of yarn? Mabe some mattresses? Newspapers?

MotelCalifornia: A dad museum? Roll for investigation

ShieldsNRoses: There it is! *rolls 3*

MotelCalifornia: If by IT you mean golf clubs...You pull them down on top of yourself

ShieldsNRoses: Do you golf?

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Eh, I’d like to think of myself as someone who would golf... eventually.

Pearlescence: There are probably a lot of weapons in there. I seem to recall you having a harpoon gun. I’m fairly sure I saw an arrow sticking out of a file box!

AwesomeSaucem: Oooh, and that sweet mask, shield and drum from Africa. Have you even been to Africa?

Pearlescence: I think I remember you having a refrigerator also. And a Japanese lantern.

MotelCalifornia: Alright guys. . . Steven, Roll again?

ShieldsNRoses: hmm, yes! *rolls a 6*

MotelCalifornia: You find a drum. Again?

ShieldsNRoses: No! I smack the drum first!

MotelCalifornia: Ok. It makes a thump sound. Roll

ShieldsNRoses: No, no... Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! Is this *rolls a 4*

MotelCalifornia: A t-shirt cannon? Why yes, yes it is!

ShieldsNRoses: cool, I shootit

MotelCalifornia: A t-shirt comes out of it.

ShieldsNRoses: ooh it says buy tshirt cannons

Pearlescence: Now that I think about it, you have a lot of sports things in there, don’t you? A croquet set, tennis balls, rackets?

AwesomeSaucem: mabe u can find some of your dads old music in there

ShieldsNRoses: YES! I roll to find some music *rolls 18*

MotelCalifornia: really? You find a box full of CDs

ShieldsNRoses: hey, there’s a bunch of copies of your old CD! I put one in my pockit

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Huh. Oh, man, I couldn’t give those things away. You know, before I ran the car wash, when I was a one-man band, I traveled the whole country.

ShieldsNRoses: lol I know, Dad.

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* When I came to play a concert here in Beach City, no one showed up

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* _except . . . _

ShieldsNRoses: An ALLIGATOR!

MotelCalifornia: What? I thought you’d say your mom. . . *Greg* No, it was your mother.

ShieldsNRoses: Hahaha, I know.

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* And we were always together after that. Until she gave up her physical form to bring you into the world. I don’t know what a magic lady like her ever saw in a plain old dope like me. roll again to find the cannon?

ShieldsNRoses: *rolls 1*

MotelCalifornia: you break something under your knee

Pearlescence: A photo frame of Greg and Rose

ShieldsNRoses: What?! uhh, dad I broke a photo.

MotelCalifornia: roll again?

ShieldsNRoses: *rolls 14*

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* It’s okay buddy. If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs. You see the cannon glow

ShieldsNRoses: Huh? The light cannon!

MotelCalifornia: Greg is ignoring Steven distracted by the red eye *Greg* Oh boy, that thing’s giving me the willies.

ShieldsNRoses: Dad I found it!

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* Really?

ShieldsNRoses: tying cord around cannon Get the van!

MotelCalifornia: ok Greg ties the other end of the cord rope to the van, then drives it forward until the cannon is out.

Pearlescence: Wouldn’t that cause everything else to come out with it?

MotelCalifornia: …yes.

ShieldsNRoses: This thing could save the city, we've gotta get it to the beach!

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* How? It’s too big for the van. rolls 3 …um. a wagon rolls by?

ShieldsNRoses: That’s perfect! We can just put the cannon into the wagon!

Pearlescence: Steven… I don’t think that any wagon that Greg is going to own will be strong enough to hold the cannon.

ShieldsNRoses: well its what we got…. it has to work

MotelCalifornia: alright Steven we’ll roll for it Easy does it. Greg puts the cannon on the wagon. Steven, roll?

ShieldsNRoses: *rolls 8* Is it gonna be okay?

MotelCalifornia: The bottom falls out and the cannon hits the ground. the rest of the wagon is in good shape though. *Greg* shrugs If every pork chop were perfect...

ShieldsNRoses: We wouldn’t have hot dogs! I tie the wagon to the van. It might be able to pull it like this?

MotelCalifornia: Sure. roll

ShieldsNRoses: *rolls 17*

MotelCalifornia: That should work. We get in the van and drive to the beach, the cannon dragging sparks behind us.

MotelCalifornia: Greg is really disturbed by the enlarged Red Eye. That thing’s getting huge, it's freaking me out.

ShieldsNRoses: Can’t the van go any faster?

MotelCalifornia: This is faster.

AwesomeSaucem: Ugh this is takign 4evr

Pearlescence: It has been a while.

ShieldsNRoses: Oh I know! Finding dad’s music earlier got this in my haed! Don’t worry. Come on, let’s put on your CD.

MotelCalifornia: uh What? Really? Come on, you’ve heard it. Steven, please no

ShieldsNRoses: You come on. youtube song Let me drive my van into your heart!

MotelCalifornia: We get to the beach

AwesomeSaucem: G r u still thowin me? that would be hilarious

STELLA: OK

AwesomeSaucem: Sweet! Throw me again, I think I’m cracking it.

MotelCalifornia: You guys notice the van coming up with the cannon draggign on the beach behind it.

AwesomeSaucem: Is that... ?

ShieldsNRoses: Hey, guys!

Pearlescence: I imagine Pearl would be very surprised. He really had it!

AwesomeSaucem: We’re SAVED!!!

MotelCalifornia: Red Eye’s gravity begins to pull everything towards it, causing rumbling and destruction. The fryshop sign falls over.

AwesomeSaucem: no not the fry shop!

MotelCalifornia: shingles are coming off the roofs, telephone poles are being pulled towards the eye, the wind is crazy

STELLA: WE HAVE TO USE IT NOW

Pearlescence: I don’t remember how she activated it. I think it was a password. I don’t know how it works, it was Rose’s!

ShieldsNRoses: Dad, how do we use it?

MotelCalifornia: I can’t just tell you that. I don’t think greg would know anywho

Pearlescence: Steven, this is serious. The gem. You have Rose’s gem.

AwesomeSaucem: a pwd or did she tap it with her gem? That’s it! I grab steven and rub him on the cannon

MotelCalifornia: that doesn’t work

AwesomeSaucem: Ah, come on!

STELLA: STOP THAT

Pearlescence: Can we get a hint? Your puzzles aren’t usually this difficult.

MotelCalifornia: I figured you guys wouldn’t remember so I’ve already given you hints.

Pearlescence: Ugh. It’s no use.

AwesomeSaucem: Fine, forget it. Throw me again.

Pearlescence: That’s not going to work.

MotelCalifornia: The gravitational pull intensifies and pulls the van and cannon.

MotelCalifornia: Greg unhooks cord from cannon *Greg:* I got this. *rolls 2* *Greg:* Ugh, wait, nope, maybe I don’t!

ShieldsNRoses: I start talkin to the canon Please work, unlock, activate, go, please! Everyone’s counting on you, you can’t just be useless! I know you can help. i gotta be able to find the password if i just keep talkin rite?

MotelCalifornia: That’s actaully pretty good. I’ll give you another hint. *Greg:* It’s okay, Steven. We’ll figure out something else, something even better.

ShieldsNRoses: right… if every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have hot dogs.

MotelCalifornia: that’s right! you activate the cannon.

Pearlescence: It’s working!

MotelCalifornia: The cannon starts folding out like rose petals it shines bright pink, then it falls forward and is now aimed at the horizon

ShieldsNRoses: the horizon?! where is the red eye?

MotelCalifornia: almost diagonal up in the sky

ShieldsNRoses: I try to lift the cannon

MotelCalifornia: roll for strength

ShieldsNRoses: *rolls 19*

MotelCalifornia: hold on let me look at your character sheet

MotelCalifornia: ok you do a good job lifting it. But its still too heavy for you to get it all the way.

Pearlescence: Steven! We’ll help! *rolls 16*

AwesomeSaucem: This is it! *rolls 18* this is gonna be sweet

STELLA: BRACE YOURSELVES *rolls 20*

MotelCalifornia: I’m glad I get to use this again. It explodes and *rolls* falls destroying parts of the city boardwalk. a giant crack in the ground. Mr Frymans car falls into the crack

AwesomeSaucem: Steven, you just saved most of Beach City!

ShieldsNRoses: poor mr fryman Sorry about that!

Pearlescence: How did you get it to work?

ShieldsNRoses: I just said that thing that Dad always says.

Pearlescence: That thing about pork rinds?

STELLA: Hot dogs.

MotelCalifornia: Greg tears up remmemberin Rose Rose...

AwesomeSaucem: yo wudnt all dat destruction hit da water and cos a big wave?

MotelCalifornia: ya probably

AwesomeSaucem: wudnt it carry ur van away?

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* My van!

ShieldsNRoses: It’s okay, Dad, if every pork chop were perfect

MotelCalifornia: *Greg* I LIVE in there! apparently

ShieldsNRoses: Wait up! I run to ward van

MotelCalifornia: Greg goes running after his van *Greg* Oh geez, wait, wait, wait!

MotelCalifornia: ok guys I think that’s enough for this week. That was a pretty good session I think.

Pearlescence: I agree! You were doing a great job today Steven!

ShieldsNRoses: Thanks! I tried my best. Saucem and Stella were being the funniest though.

AwesomeSaucem: ya i no im great

MotelCalifornia: Alright so let’s meet up again next time. We’ll be heading to the Sea Spire for this one.

Pearlescence: Oh, how lovely! I’ve always liked the Sea Spire. I can’t help but imagine it as being very majestic. I’ll see you all then.

AwesomeSaucem: ttyl

ShieldsNRoses: Bye!

MotelCalifornia: Cya then.

[askjaaryl]

Episode 18: “Detour”

S2E10 - The trip to Alexandria takes a detour as the Hilltop caravan is forced to stop overnight due to the weather. Daryl and Paul resolve their issues. Enid tells Carl and someone overhears. Paul makes a decision for the safety of his new family and the communities.

Trigger warning for direct mentions of past sexual assault.

Paul put his head back against the headrest, listening to Daryl and Aaron fight outside. It had started to rain when they were halfway to Alexandria, so hard that their caravan had to pull off the road.

“GET IN THE TRUCK!” Aaron yelled over the rain.

Paul winced as he heard Daryl make a loud, angry groan, before feeling the truck shifting a little bit. He glanced through the back window and saw Daryl and Aaron putting his bike in the back of the truck. He watched them for a few moments before turning back and looking forward.

He didn’t like their new truck and missed the old tan one they had, but they couldn’t get it back until the Free Men weren’t in the area.

A few seconds later, Daryl got in through the driver’s side, sliding over to make room for Aaron.

“That came out of nowhere,” Aaron sighed, taking off his jacket, which was now soaked from the rain. He took out the walkie, “Hey, Glenn, do you think we should wait?”

“We ain’t waitin’,” Daryl snapped.

Aaron ignored him with a sigh, waiting for Glenn’s response.

“There’s no way we can go anywhere while we can’t see,” Glenn said over the walkie, “If it doesn’t slack off within the next hour, I’m calling it for the night. We’re by marker five, if we can make it to six there’s the old hunting cabin that Hilltop owns that we can stay in for the night.”

“I’m not staying in that stupid cabin overnight,” Paul added quietly.

“Okay, just radio back when you decide,” Aaron said before turning the walkie off, “Looks like we’re stuck here for a while.”

“They don’t know if my damn brother’s gonna walk again and we’re stuck here because of the fuckin’ rain?” Daryl snapped, “Just fuckin’ drive, man.”

“I’m not going to drive aimlessly when I can’t see the road,” Aaron told him, “Rick is fine, they said so. He’s breathing, keep that in mind.”

“And talking, don’t forget talking,” Paul snorted, putting his head out the window, “Probably blabbing to everyone he can find to tell them that his brother is dating a poor, scared, rape victim.”

“Paul,” Aaron snapped, “Don’t talk about yourself like that.”

“Oh, don’t like when I call it what it is?” Paul asked, leveling him with a glare, “I was raped. R-A-P-E. Does that word bother you? Everyone acts all accepting of it until I actually say the word.”

“You’re mad at me, leave ‘im outta this,” Daryl mumbled.

Paul just huffed, putting his head back and not saying anything else.

“Marker two flooded over from the rain,” Glenn’s voice said over the crackling walkie, “We’re going to stay in the cabin overnight and the road crew from Alexandria will come and help us cross in the morning.”

“FUCK!” Daryl yelled, slamming his foot against the dashboard.

“Seriously?” Paul growled, Aaron wasn’t sure if it was at the news that they’d be staying in the cabin or that Daryl probably just busted their radio.

“Okay, lead the way, we’ll follow your taillights,” Aaron said, putting the walkie down, “You two need to stop. We’re going to be in a cabin overnight with our friends, it’ll make them uncomfortable.”

“Oh, sorry for embarrassing you,” Paul scoffed, “From now on I’ll just stick to your bedroom and be your little boytoy like everyone thinks I am.”

“Quit it!” Daryl snapped at him as they started to move, “Ya ain’t that! That ain’t what ya are and you know it!”

“Does everyone else?” Paul challenged, “After what you told Rick, it’s going to get around and make that worse. It’s just like the world before...either rape victims are too broken to have sex or they’re having sex and doing it to forget,” he snorted, “But trust me, I’m always just going to be seen as someone’s sextoy-”

“Stop,” Daryl choked out finally, sounding more upset than angry now.

Aaron’s knuckle was white on the steering wheel and Paul could tell he’d hit a nerve with both of them.

“I love ya, ya little asshole,” Daryl said, turning to him, “I know what I did was wrong, but I did it ‘cause I-I can’t lose ya, not again, not when we finally have ya with us. Sittin’ by your bed, thinkin’ ya was never gonna wake up, that we was never gonna get ta tell ya how we felt...it broke me, Paul. Both of us.”

Paul stared at him with teary eyes, “You hurt me,” he said quietly, “So bad...when you told Rick. If it was necessary, I would have told them eventually-”

“S’necessary now,” Daryl told him, “M’sorry and I actually mean that...I know I was wrong, that I should’a talked to ya about it.”

Paul nodded slowly.

“I’m gonna do everything I can to earn back the trust I lost with ya,” Daryl explained, putting his hand on his cheek, “I love ya so damn much.”

Paul stared at him for a moment before nodding slowly, unbuckling his seatbelt and wrapping his arms around Daryl’s neck, hugging him tightly, “I love you too,” he whispered against his shoulder.

Daryl just rubbed his back, not saying anything as they drove. He glanced over at Aaron, nodding as he did and holding Paul closer.

They stayed that like until they made it up to the rest of the cars. They could barely see the red lights on the back of the truck in front of them before they shut off.

Glenn jogged over, using his jacket as cover as he did.

Aaron opened the door, “We here?”

“Yeah!” Glenn called over the rain, “Get whatever you need for the night and lock up your truck, the cabin isn’t far.”

Aaron nodded and Paul quickly grabbed their overnight bags from the back.

The three of them got out of the truck and Paul winced when his feet sunk into the mud a little. He followed after the group quickly, not wanting to get too wet. Paul glanced back a few times, making sure that Lydia was keeping up as she walked with Daryl, smiling at her when she smiled at him.

The cabin was small, but it would be okay for their group (consisting of himself, Aaron, Daryl, Glenn, Carl, and Enid). It had two small bedrooms (one with a bed and the other with two sets of bunk beds, most likely it had been a family’s vacation cabin in the old world) with a small living room/kitchen area in between them.

And leaks in the roof, apparently.

Paul put a spare pan under the third leak he’d found and sighed, “Okay, we should get to sleep if we want to get a headstart first thing in the morning.”

“I’ll take a bottom bunk,” Enid said immediately, going into the other room.

“I call top bunk,” Carl added, hurrying after her with a laugh.

“I’ll sleep on the other bunk,” Glenn nodded to Paul, trying to act like he wasn’t pulling the protective dad card.

“Oh cool, I call top bunk with Carl-” Lydia started.

“Nope,” Daryl grabbed her by the back of the shirt, “Ya take the bed in the other room, we’ll take the pullout in the livin’ room, ya’ll ain’t sleepin’ together.”

Lydia stared at him for a moment, not breaking his gaze, before huffing, “Whatever,” she mumbled, stomping into the room.

Paul rolled his eyes and stared at the door where Enid, Carl, and Glenn were staying for a moment, a worried look on his face, before starting to get their bed ready.

“Miss Dog,” Daryl grumbled irritably, lying down once the bed was out.

“We’ll be home tomorrow,” Aaron told him with a sigh, sitting down on the edge of the bed and starting on the straps of his prosthetic.

Paul grabbed one of the old quilts from the closet and put it at the end of the bed, grabbing a few pillows for them as well. He was just about to go make sure Lydia had everything, then check on the other room. He swallowed when Daryl grabbed his hand, pulling him back.

“Relax,” Daryl told him, “Ya ain’t gotta take care ‘a everyone. Let’s just sleep, yeah?”

Paul stared at him for a moment before nodding, sitting down as well.

Daryl pulled his jacket off of him before starting on the buttons of his shirt.

“You don’t have to…” Paul trailed off.

“Let me,” Daryl said quietly, pushing the shirt back off his shoulders.

“You don’t have anything to make up for,” Paul told him, “I understand why you did what you did.”

“Doesn’t make it right,” Daryl mumbled, “Doesn’t make Rick tellin’ Maggie right either...an’ I ain’t making nothin’ up, m’just helpin’ ya get ready for bed.”

Aaron started to kiss his neck, suddenly there and close to him, his shirt gone as well.

“It feels good,” Paul said quietly, leaning his head back to give Aaron more room, “Being all together again,” he breathed out, hand going to grip the curly hair at the nape of Aaron’s neck.

Enid jumped down from the top bunk loudly, looking over at her dad to make sure she hadn’t woken him up. She walked over and waved her hand in front of his closed eyes a few times.

“What are you doing?” Carl whispered, sitting up, half asleep.

“We need to talk...outside,” Enid told him, “I just didn’t want him to hear and make me stay inside.”

Carl stared at her for moment before nodding and getting up. He grabbed his boots from where he’d tossed them, not bothering to lace them up as he did, following his friend out to the front door.

Lydia rubbed her eyes, unable to sleep. The rain made everything so loud, especially outside, and she just couldn’t sleep.

She tensed and grabbed her knife from her pair of boots when she heard the door open and close. She quickly got up, not bothering with her shoes, and tiptoed out.

Lydia walked passed the pullout couch, where Daryl, Jesus, and Aaron were snoring softly, close together. Paul was in the middle with Daryl’s arms wrapped around his waist tightly. Paul’s forehead was against Aaron’s shoulder, almost hiding his face in his arm. Their breathing was all even and she knew they were actually asleep, but Daryl was a light sleeper and was closest to the door.

The door had been propped open by whoever went out so it didn’t get stuck behind them and she walked closer to the crack in the door, listening to the voices outside.

“Do you remember about a month ago at the faire?” Enid asked quietly, her arms wrapped around her stomach, “Wh-When you and Lydia were broken up and Alden and I…?” she trailed off.

“Yeah,” Carl said quietly, “I thought you didn’t want to bring it up again. What’s wrong?”

Enid bit her lip, “I was...late, recently. It happens sometimes, I just figured it was nothing but then I started getting sick.”

“Are you okay?” Carl asked immediately.

“I….technically, yeah,” Enid swallowed, “I’m pregnant...and I know it’s not Alden’s, it’s yours.”

Carl stared at her, shock written all over his face.

“I know it’s a bad time, with your dad a-and you’re back with Lydia now and I’m with Alden,” Enid took a shaky breath, “But I think I want to keep it. They’ll be raised with such a loving family at Hilltop.”

Carl took a deep breath, “Yeah...yeah, you’re right,” he bit his lip, “Does anyone  else know?”

“Just Jesus,” Enid said quietly, “I talked to him, after I found out,” she swallowed, “That’s another reason I wanted to go to Alexandria with you guys...not that I don’t trust Alex, but Siddiq is a doctor and I want him to check things out.”

Carl nodded, holding his head a little higher, “Just let me know anything you need.”

“I need to tell Alden,” Enid said, scrubbing her hand over her face, “And...my family. You need to tell Lydia and yours.”

Carl sighed and swallowed, “I’ll talk to her when we get back to Hilltop. We need to focus on what we need to do in Alexandria first.”

“You’re right,” Enid nodded, “I want to tell my parents when we get home too.”

“Lyd?” Daryl asked tiredly, squinting up at her, “What ‘cha doin’ there?”

“Nothing,” Lydia whispered, “Go back to sleep.”

Daryl moved his arms from around Paul slowly and got up, walking over, “Hey...you’re cryin’, what’s goin’ on?” he asked, looking out the door as well. He saw Enid and Carl hugging tightly and sighed, “Ain’t like that...they’re still friends. He’s with ya, she’s with Alden, ‘member?”

Lydia whipped around and hugged him tightly, burying her head in his shirt.

Daryl blinked in shock for a moment before putting his arms around her, rocking her slightly, “Hey, c’mon now…” he trailed off, rubbing her back, “What’s buggin’ ya?”

“I…” Lydia trailed off, looking up at him, “Sorry,” she whispered.

“S’okay,” Daryl told her, “Ya can talk ta me..”

Lydia stared at him for moment before swallowing, “I don’t like staying in Barrington,” she mumbled, “I guess...being here, staying overnight with you guys jut in the other room, made me realize that,” she sniffled, wiping her eyes, “I-I know the house isn’t done yet-”

“Gonna be done by summer,” Daryl told her, “If ya want, ya can maybe stay on the couch in the trailer, maybe set ya up a cot in Paul’s office or Gracie’s room.”

Lydia looked down, shuffling her feet, “Yeah...maybe,” she said quietly, “Sorry I woke you,” she told him, “I’m gonna go back to bed now,” she whispered, pulling away.

Daryl nodded, watching her go, “G’night,” he told her. He waited until her door closed before he stalked outside, closing the door behind him before yelling, “GET YOUR ASSES INSIDE!” he yelled, causing them both to jump apart, breathing heavily.

“Very funny,” Carl grumbled when Daryl snickered at their shocked faces.

“Sorry,” Enid mumbled, walking inside quickly and brushing by Daryl as she did.

Daryl put his arm out before Carl could walk in after her, raising an eyebrow.

“It was nothing, Uncle Daryl,” Carl said quickly.

Daryl just stared at him.

“Look, just let me tell my dad first, then you, okay?” Carl sighed, “Nothing life threatening, nothing that’ll cause bodily harm.”

Daryl stared for another moment before nodding, letting him in. He stared out at the forest for a minute before going inside, closing and locking the door behind them. He walked back over to the couch and slowly moved behind Paul again, trying not to wake him or Aaron up as he secured his arms around his boyfriend’s waist once again, his hand clinging to Aaron’s.

“You’re a good uncle,” Aaron said simply, not even opening his eyes.

Daryl just scoffed, burying his face in the back of Paul’s neck.

They arrived at Alexandria first thing the next morning, the sun shining down on the community...but it wasn’t exactly all sunshine in the Alexandria community today.

There were makeshift walls up, rather than their usual steel ones. Cars and busses were parked where the wall had been damaged and there were more guards on the gate than usual. A construction crew was working on the inside of the wall, but it seemed to be slow progress.

When they got inside the gates, Paul felt even worse, looking at the church that was in shambles on top of a few houses being damaged. As he walked down the street he stopped in shock when he saw Aaron’s old house had been damaged as well, a few windows broken and red spray paint littered across the front.

WE ARE FREE, THERE ARE NO LAWS NOW

Paul took a shaky breath, looking over to where Aaron and Daryl were talking with Michonne. He quickly walked over, not even saying hello as he made his announcement.

“I’m staying for the cleanup, but after that, I need to go to the Kingdom.”