#im only embarrassing myself at this point | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dizquized · 7 months ago

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FOR YOUR OWN SANITY, do not look in the tags, dont do it. its not worth it. a demon possessed me or something, i dont know.

#alastor #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #WHY IS IT LIKE HTAT #every time i see his fuckass bob i break down cry-laughing #EVERY TIME #i legit cant stop myself from just falling to the floor because his haircut is just that bad #hes supposed to be like a super powerful demon #but he chose THAT haircut???#he put all his points in Vertical and tries to fake horizontalness with his coat and also by folding himself so he's as flat as a table #he knows he is horizontally challenged #he also put all his points in 2014 uber duber scary oc #but he skipped past the haircut one #like #do you not see yourself in a mirror? do you walk past reflective surfaces eyes closed?#maybe he doesnt allow photos or videos because he saw his haircut once and he legit had no idea it was that bad #he doesnt allow photos or videos because he doesnt wanna get embarrassed more than he already has with that stupid bob #its so bad like actually #he can apparently shapeshift (unsure tho) which means that haircut was a conscious desicion #he CHOSE the “kick me!” sticky note life and he better regret it soon #anyways rant aside #yeah alastor's pretty cool #he's very fun to draw (from the front and the front only)#its honestly so fortunate that most times hes facing the camera #which is funny considering his hate for modern technology #yet he very often is facing towards the camera with his bigass smile #ok i think im going off topic oops #hazbin hotel #hazbinhotel #hazbin alastor

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gaysforbyler · 7 days ago

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Would you be mad if I seeked attention? I seek attention I’m an attention seeker

#I’ve actually passed the point of mediating how much personal shit i post on here because im way too depressed to care about repercussions #who cares if i embarrass myself by rant posting and crawling out of the depths for attention like a little worm?#you feel bad for me. look at me im so pitiful you want to pet my head like a stray dog #that’s fucking wild im crazy #im not drunk i swear. ive only drunk three times this week #im just actually insane and i don’t feel alive right now #It’s all a shitty joke but none of it is actually a joke except for the cringy wording

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purpurussy · 3 months ago

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#tw suicide #idk i feel like i am probably gonna kms after TIT #i would do it sooner but i asked one of my friends to come with me and it would suck if i made him go alone #and it is something to look forward to which is helping me hang on i guess #but ughhhh once uni starts again in september i know everything is gonna fall apart.#i already got an extension on my thesis due to being a useless shell of a person who can't motivate themselves to do anything atm #but i was supposed to get some work done over the summer and have so far done nothing #hence why i want to kms before i have to talk to my fucking supervisors again and admit yet again that i simply cannot do this 😭#and it's not just this. my executive dysfunction has been so bad over the past couple of years and it's only getting worse #to the point where i can't imagine being able to work at all. and if i can't work i can't get out of my parents house #and then what the fuck is the point.#every time i see someone on here talking about bonding with their parents over dnp I'm like damn what's it like #to have parents who actually want to talk to you DSFGJJKL i know they let me live in their house at my big age #but that's only bc id literally be homeless otherwise and they're not like evil. they just don't love me #also went through a deeply embarrassing breakup recently #tl;dr ive been in love with this person for over a decade and i thought they were the dan to my phil or vice versa.#then after 10 years they left me and i'll spare the details but it has me wondering if they ever loved me #i thought it was a “let's live together and get a cat one day” relationship #but now i feel like for them. it was just a “sex and video games” type situation #i am trying soooo hard to at least be creative bc that makes me happy sometimes but it's hard to not be overly critical of myself #and now im getting to a point where i can barely even find any joy in this space any more. for a bunch of reasons #most of which revolve around me being extremely sensitive. and this is like my last bastion of dopamine so that fucking sucks #idk i don't see the point in my life any more. a social worker actually told me recently that i should consider euthanasia so.#it's just completely over for me i fear #this is not even mentioning all the damn migraines. and all the other ways in which my body simply doesn't work properly #sorry for this weird ass vent I'm not in therapy any more bc i couldn't find a therapist willing to treat me+all my diagnoses at this point #and im scared my friends will stop wanting to talk to me if i talk to them about this. several of them already have #the 2 friends i have left anyway. that's a whole other thing. when they said it's hard for autistic ppl to make friends i took that persona #so uh at this point it's vent here or develop a substance abuse problem. and im already halfway to having a substance abuse problem #anyway dan and phil for the love of god please fucking post something tonight. unfortunately you are my only hope

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dragonji · 4 months ago

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got thoroughly yelled at by my parents (well. mostly my father. as per usual.) Again over a monetary situation and really just barely grasping for any justification to not suck it up and kms already .Only reason im having a panic attack instead of actually doing anything is he was so mad he wouldnt even finish a conversation with me just hung up so I didnt get chewed out half as much as normal but I Know its still coming eventually. no helping it when he gets apocalyptic like this. and I was finally having a slightly better time these past couple days too. whatever karmic law I've offended please just take me now I am not stable enough for any of this. If you want me back in the cycle of reincarnation hurry up and commit Im so deeply over this death by a thousand cuts shit

#j.txt #im just. so so so unbelievably tired. how is this my only way to live. just keep forking over money to try to appease everyone #until I starve and not even be able to talk to anyone about it bc therapy costs too much and its fucking embarrassing to boot.#I dont know what to do anymore. how do I fix it how do I earn the right to be Left Alone why do I never learn to sidestep the pitfalls #whats so horribly wrong with me that even thinking of explaining myself paralyzes me with genuine mortal fear #to the point that I Wish it were actually a life or death decision. at least when I fail it would be easier #sui mention #vent

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cetoddle · 27 days ago

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okay what i have to say is lowkey embarrassing but i wanna bitch and it’s probably only embarrassing to me bc im shy about this stuff anyways the moral of the story is i wanna bitch and u should probably just ignore me. god bless

#honestly halfway through the wedding i did see this guy i thought was rlly cute #like. REALLY cute (so fucking embarrassing)#but i’m too shy to talk to hot people and i’ve never approached anyone before and no one’s ever approached me so i don’t know what to do #idk how to talk to people to begin with let alone like. try to flirt or something #but as the night went on (this is so embarrassing) for some reason i literally couldn’t stop looking at him (kill me)#and he probably definitely noticed me looking at him so he probably thinks im some like. crazy creep or something #but like usually when i see someone attractive im just like oh wow and admire them from afar #but i COULDNT STOP LOOKING AT HIM! WHY! and for some reason i felt like i just really wanted to talk to him #but i didn’t know what to do! i just felt this urge to go try and start a conversation but i just. i couldn’t #and every time i thought i would work up the courage either my sister or my grandmother would come back and hover over me #and i didn’t wanna be like ‘sorry gotta go i need to go embarrass myself in front of this cute guy’#OR he would get up and start taking pictures again. it’s like he knew #he wasn’t even the official photographer he was just one of the guests who clearly wanted to take photos of his friends wedding. which like #is so endearing to me. he has HOBBIES. WOW. (kill me)#idk j can’t even put everything into words i just feel like screaming into a pillow AAAAAAUGHHH #i felt like i was in hs again there was a point i even excused myself to step outside just because he was out there #but he was talking to some old lady. so i was just sitting outside in the grass moping #i feel so stupid i dunno. why am i so worked up about this. i had a few opportunities to approach him and i didnt. because im an idiot #i feel like i’m down so bad which is so STUPID because i don’t even know his name and ill never see him again in my life #so it doesn’t even matter! and every time im like oh oh well it was just random infatuation clearly it wasn’t meant to be #but then i just get upset and all blushy cause he was SO CUTE! and i wanna know more about him! why!#i haven’t felt like this in FOREVER i just feel so stupid for even feeling this way #i know ill be fine in a few days or something but im just like. i wish i could have at least spoken to him once #sigh. idk what’s wrong with me #maybe he’s already dating someone anyways all the cute people seem to already be in relationships #except ME im the only one left. who am I supposed to date!!#i want to jump out the window #snow.txt

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queer-pagan-witch · 7 months ago

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One day I will learn, that just because the bottle is low, does not mean I need to finish off the bottle.

#imma be so fuckin hungover tomorrow #someone should kiss me #and i moght be either asexual or aromantic or both which like woo thats funny to only me for so many trauma reasons #i love #im so drunk #i too drunk #i stated typing thos at 12:30 #imma smoke pot after i post this #if your reqding my tags hi i love you. why are you reading this though like im a schizo bipolar depreased trans girl im unhinged in the tags #i need to stop drinking by myself #if think im an alcoholic as well if it wasnt for the fact that i can genuinely stop when ever i want but idkmaybe that changes?#at this point im just typing to annoy myself cause i think its funny to annoy other people and itd be hypothetical to not annoy myself #im ramblimg in the tags and honestly its your fault for still reading this #trans thought time #i wish i was born with a pussy but i do like having a cock and there is a possibility im genderfluid and fuck me that sucks if true #like how do you transition if your genderfluid? like i kinda want a cock and pussy and i know thats an actual option #but is it the right option?#i hate being trans but not knowing what kinda trans maybe ill hit where im at with my gender and just say tranny #cause i already say faggot for my sexuality instead of anything specific maybe i should just say tranny #this is probably what a therapist is for but idk if i can justify paying for this instead of saving money to buy a hoise #america sucks #capitalism sucks #love is such a bullshit thing #how can i be in love with some ane be in love with someone. being in love is nothing but selfish but also you have to be selfish for youryou #like i know that doesn't make sense sense but it makes sense to me and i also know its wrong #maybe i should give up and spend money on a therapist #i love my freinds and would sacrifice myself for them literally #12:51 and i have one more short tag to add #i hope you didnt read this far cause even in a drunk state this tag is embarrassing and im sorry you know me irl im sorry this is rambly+ugh #but if you dead read all the tags <3 i love yoh and would die for you

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juniperberrypipebomb · 7 months ago

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Decided to log into twitter (hell) and outside of everything going to shit as always i found this piece of shit as my banner

I dont even remember when i made this but i do remember that i did and i remember how i made it

I saw a picture on twitter w some kind of caption and decided that i could make it look like a banner

i tried to add the fire flaming text that i saw on some reposted to twitter tumblr posts where someome makes a grammatical error and someone corrects them in a form of flaming (sometimes animated) text (never change guys, gals and all of you magnificent pals lol) but at the time i didnt know the website that you all used so i tried to improvise and google

I remember half way thru the making of this text being so upset that it looked like shit but after taking a break for 20 minutes i said "fuck it, it is way funnier this way" and i kinda glad that back then i decided to "fuck it we ball" it

It looks disgusting and i love it

#i unironically glad i found it bc it still holds up to me #not in a sense that its still THAT funny to me (i believe i made it when i was like when i was maybe 17-ish) but it feels kinda #nostalgic #some might say that its not nostalgic it all like “lol #you're 21 how tf can this shit be nostalgic to you #you still havent experienced x y and z you're a still young adult who havent decided what your future is you dont get to feel nostalgic #about your past outside of movies you watched when you were a child lol“#and i kinda disagree #bc at that point of my life i only started to figure myself out (hell i only “recently” realised im nonbinary and multisexual)#and looking back at how i used to be #it definitely feels like ive made a lot of progress in self development and self improvement #and its kind of nostalgic for me to see my old abandoned twitter page (i should probably nuke it completely) and see that everything change #everyone learns #everyone becomes different #everything stays the same while also changing simultaneously #did i really got emotional over my old banner?#anyways whoever finds this post i kinda thank you for reading thru my schizophrenic post and i wish you a good day #juniper's tree branches #juniper stupider #ramblings #nonsense rumblings #will delete this cringe later when ill be embarrassed about it

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ableedingpromise · 3 months ago

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GUYS I DIDNT CHOKE TO DEATH IM SO HAPPYYYYYYY

#by now its obvious thag what i have is probably ocd even my mom pointed it out lol #but it feels embarrassing to put it into writing because im not like. diagnosed by a professional #but then again he did call what i had complusions so ig i half was??? him saying that is what made me realise i really did have ocd #my compulsions (?) or fears get way too real and end up making them real to me too #like a self fulfilling prophecy #i figured out how to “fix” it kind of by myself before i even checked ocd #i realised if i let my fears get worse ill end up not being able to do anything... i couldnt even eat bc i was so paranoid #so i forced myself even if i did choke on it #and it worked out so yayyy but not really. BECAUSE IT KEEPS COMING BACK. When in high stress situations i get sm worse.... the only thing #that makes it better is my mom which is why i hate myself 😭#hhhhh

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marklikely · 6 months ago

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i hope this isn't like out of line for me to say but sometimes i get offended (<- very mildly not like actually offended) at the white tumblr user stereotypes like surely nobody could actually be that cringe we arent that bad and then i see people being exactly that cringe if not more so. so like okay.

#i dont want to separate myself from whiteness im not immune to blind spots or ignorance or even just plain being embarrassing #but jesus christ theres a difference between unavoidably hitting a blind spot or being ill equipped to talk abt smth due to privilege #and like. very shamelessly displaying your ignorance on a neon sign with no intent to improve.#avpost #this is only a little bit about last rb its mostly about the entire wave of discourse going on right now wrt rap #how are people still in 2024 like i dont listen to rap its all violent and misogynist.#literally fox news talking points a DECADE AGO how are people still this far behind i dont. GET IT?#and to be so proud and bold about it too.#let me give you guys some advice if you encounter a blind spot for you you ARE allowed to not tell anyone and just quietly learn more.#youre allowed to just make an effort to improve yourself and listen to people who dont have the same privileges.#you dont have to stand up and get loud about your own ignorances! nobody is forcing you to make a stupid comment!!

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dnangelic · 4 months ago

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im a pisces (sorry) so the scorpioisms of dark n dai do in fact embarrass me. but if sakurai can do it as a pisces i can too

#*･ﾟ⊰ 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐒. ⊱ ✦ › OUT.#wherever tht post thts like 'being a dom is only cool if people like u otherwise its super embarrassing cause #if nobody shows up u might as well die'#thats how i feel. every day. before embarrassing myself with dark as a muse #i have like 0 possessive tendency naturally as a person meanwhile dark is just MINE!!! MINE MINE 25/8 #i hate confrontation im vague i go by vibes dark n dai meanwhile r scarily on point with ppl when it comes to their intuition #etc.#but i can pretend. water sign solidarity #my crybaby bob the builder ass CAN do it yes we can

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lovsome · 5 months ago

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just cried in the shower thinking about my bf !! who have i become 😳

#love changes you!!!!!#anyways all i can think about these days is how i am restraining myself from telling him i am in love with him lol #weve been dating only like 2.5 months i feel like its a short time but at the same time i feel like ive been with him forever like it feels #like years… and we talked about it he feels the same…….. like ive had him in my life forever #the other night i brought him home and we always talk in the car for a very long time and at some point he just looked at me and said #something like ‘you know youre my best friend and my confidant.. i dont know what id be doing without you’ and i almost started crying #because i feel the same like we are best friends and then also everything else like physical attraction and all of that but we have so much #fun together 🥹#and it made me think of ‘you are in love’ by taylor swift when she says ‘one night he wakes/strange look on his face/pauses then says/#youre my best friend/and you knew what it was/he is in love’#🥺🥺🥺#sorry for being so corny i just love him so much #oh and since he works at a small cinema in our city he has the keys to the cinema… and we sometimes go there late at night when no one is #there and watch whatever movies we want in the theater lmao #the other day i wanted to start watchingthe office with him because he never watched it and i think hed love it but we ended up not being #able to watch it at my house… so that night he took his theater keys when we went out and took me to the cinema to watch the office there #🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 oof #anyways……. im so in love its embarrassing

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soul-spoken · 7 months ago

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I vent or breakdown so often, I know I get told it's fine and talk when I need to but geez it feels so excessive, like I'm overly sensitive or just really really easily triggered over things that shouldn't even relate to my trauma

We come to solutions or we distract from it, or we cuddle, but it's just always there.

I can almost always feel the dumb anxiety or depression feelings, I don't want to

I wish my brain understood that