#im not okay but like in the best way possible
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getting stood up -or ditched- by ur stupid boyfriend and desperate for a way home cause a lil bunny can’t walk home alone at night so as a last resort, you call dads bsf price, who is more than happy to pick up his best friends little girl xx and he can’t drop her off without showing her what a real man is
ps: i absolutely adore your writing x keep it up bby
a defeated little sigh slips from your glossed lips as you stare at the text message, received fifty minutes after you’d sent the first one.
“i don’t think i’ll be able to make it tonight, i forgot about it and now i am busy, sorry!”
you weren’t sad he couldn’t make it, of course, you would’ve appreciated it if he’d at least warned you about his little slip of memory, but if anything, that little mistake only sealed your mind even more — it’s not like you were a couple, you’d only been on a date once, and this was supposed to be the second one. clearly, he wasn’t interested, and you weren’t either, but you’d been left alone waiting for him for more than a hour, like an abandoned little bunny. you didn’t deserve this, you deserved a princess treatment.
nibbling on your bottom lip, you stood outside the building, the night breeze cold against your bare thighs as you considered your options — you couldn’t possibly call your father, he’d be livid with both the guy for living you alone at night, and you for ending up in this reckless situation. also, you didn’t want to make him worry too much.
so, your baby pink nails clipped against the screen as you recklessly quickly typed the number of the only person you trusted the most, the only one you could think about that could come and save you. only tree ringings passed by, before you heard his deep, gruff and rough voice from the other side of the phone.
“hello?”
your heartbeat immediately increased, effected by his low tone, beating faster and nervously. he sounded rougher, huskier.
“sir?” you tried to swallow down your heart, poor thing trying to flutter outside of your chest — your cheeks were painted red, covered by a warm and bright blush.
“doll?” you caught the slight urgency in his voice, though it sounded controlled and steady as always. a few seconds of silence passed after his reply, and you imagined him glancing down at his wrist watch, before muttering out “what’s wrong?”
“i’m fine, im really sorry to bother you at this hour—“
“you never bother me, sweetheart. what happened?”
you hesitated, looking down towards your mary jane white heels “can you please come pick me up? im alone and i didn’t wanna call my father cause he’d get angry, pretty please?”
you bit your lip, torn between relief and regret for deciding to call him without even thinking twice. maybe he’d been sleeping, tired after work—?
“where are you, princess?”
“outside of a restaurant, i’ll text you the address, okay?”
the sudden rustling of fabric and the light jingle of keys echoed from the phone, and you could picture him standing up, his broad, muscular body walking towards his door “wait for me, doll, be there in a few”
less than ten minutes went by when you recognized his old fashioned car, driving up to a halt right in front of your place on the sidewalk. you mentally prayed and thanked God for sending you your personal knight, the rumble of the car’s engine the only sound around the otherwise peaceful and too silent air.
you quickly opened the passenger’s door and got inside of the car, immediately filled with the familiar scent of cigars, tobacco and expensive cologne that swirled around you.
“thank you for coming, sir,” you were nervous, you felt embarrassed, and he could see that, under the dim light surrounding the car, his sharp and intense eyes never left you, taking in the way your fingers fidgeted together, hands resting on your lap like a squirming bunny that couldn’t handle being too close to him.
even in the dark your blushing cheeks were so bright, he could see them, red and flushed — with one large hand gripping the steering wheel, he leisurely admired your short dress, before starting the engine and driving away.
“who do i have to kill, mmh?”
you almost gave out a smile, but only shook your head at him. “no one, sir, im okay”
“date stood you up, bunny?”
you loved his nickname for you. it made you blush and heart flutter.
there was no point in telling him a white lie. with a soft sigh, you leaned your head back on the seat. “it wasn’t a date..he’s not even my boyfriend. we’ve gone out once and today we were supposed to have dinner together. but he clearly wasn’t interested since he texted me that he’d forgotten and was apparently too busy to tell me instead of ditching me and leaving me all alone”
john kept driving, and you dared a shy glance towards him. he always radiated confidence and strong masculinity — he was so handsome, so respectful and manly, the manliest man that existed. he was a real man, the one you truly wanted, and no one could ever take his place in your heart, your poor heart was aware of that. a little, sweet and too young girl falling for a man too old for you, old enough to be your father.
only then, a glimpse of an amused lazy grin appeared beneath his thick, dark beard, littered with gray on the right spots. he shook his head once, focused on the road, “stupid kid, he was. he’s merely a boy, love, boys his age don’t know shit about how to treat a sweet bunny like you, sweetheart. dumb dog”
you blushed more at his words, clenching your bare knees until they touched, your thighs exposed and filled with goosebumps provoked by the chill night air and his deep voice.
“doesn’t matter, it can happen. im not sad or anything, just…it feels mortifying. he could’ve at least texted me, you know? could’ve just told me he didn’t want to go out anymore. makes me feel like im insignificant. that’s why i’ve never liked guys my age.”
you couldn’t even stop that last line from slipping out of your glossed lips, at that point, you’d just been rumbling to him. he remained quiet, listening to you as he drove, and you recognized the familiar ice cream place, the trees and local church that were close to your neighborhood.
“bunny, that kid was an asshole, ‘s not your fault. an angel like you deserves a real man who knows what he wants and what you want. not some idiot” he punctuated the last word with a gruff chuckle, the sound vibrating around the tiny space between you. “don’t waste time with people like him. could pay him a visit, if you want”
“please don’t sir” you quickly said, your lips already curving in an entertained smile, “we’re never gonna see each other anymore, anyway”
“made my bunny stay outside all alone at night, could send him to jail. gonna make him be real busy behind bars,” you knew he was being playful just to make you smile, but his voice sounded even lower, deep and rough, with a hint of threatening to it. “why didn’t you call your dad?”
you hesitated, blinking at him from under your long lashes, puppy dog eyes shy and timid as you shrugged “he would’ve gotten man at him for leaving me alone and at me for ending up in this situation, always finds a way to blame the victim.”
you saw him shifting gear, and without even realizing it, you were already on your main street. tilting your head towards the darkened mirror, you recognized your front porch, standing in the dark with no lights on. your dad must’ve been asleep, or maybe was waiting for you to come back in his room. but from the windows, you saw that all the lights were off.
“im glad i called you, sir, thank you for coming and helping me. i really don’t know how to thank you” you turned towards him again, giving him another smile.
“was a pleasure, bunny, no need to pay me back. just seeing you in this short dress is enough.” he turned off his car, smirking lazily at you with a look that made you shiver and turn into flames, flushing red and warm. you wanted him so bad, you felt bad for how much you wanted him.
you swallowed, fluttering your lashes at him, grabbing your purse and pushing your heels down, as if reminding yourself that you had to say goodbye and go. “w-well, then, thank you again, sir,” blushing like shooting stars, like the bright rays of the sun, you leaned closer to him, wanting to give him a goodbye kiss on the cheek.
as soon as you leaned over, you felt his hands grab your waist, tugging you by your hips and pushing you against his lap. you almost squeaked, and your lips found his mouth, instead of his cheek. he waisted no time throwing your legs on his sides, making you sink against him, practically straddling him. the sudden contact made you press your mouth more firmly against his, muffling a little sound as a rush of warmth spread between your legs.
he trailed his hand over your neck, until it tangled in your long hair and grabbed a fistful of it to tilt your face against his. he kissed you hard, almost violently, like a starving, animalistic man. you whined against him, throwing your hands around his neck, the pain in your scalp from how much he was pulling your head mingling with pleasure.
you parted your lips slightly as he pushed his tongue inside of your mouth, licking every free inch until it pressed against yours. his free hand trailed under the hem of your sundress making you whimper and cling closer to him. you felt the cold metal of his rings against your bare thigh as he gripped your flesh, brushing his hand up and down until it reaches the hem of your panties.
you skipped a breath, tilting your head to give him more access as he devoured your lips, crashing against them in a feverish kiss full of bites, tongue and teeth.
“sir, sir—“ your words were muffled by the kisses, but you didn’t want to stop, you only wanted him, to feel him and to be with him.
he parted only for a second, looking down at you with a hungry, dark gaze “shhh, shhh doll, don’t wan’ anyone to wake up, huh bunny?”
he grabbed your chin, pressing his mouth heavy against yours. “you know how hard it is to see you going out like this, how badly daddy wants to have you all to himself, mh?
your breath grew heavier, and you could only nod at him, breathlessly, doe eyes glimmering, big and innocent and so needy.
“look at you…so fucking innocent, such a good girl, no one deserves you, angel. gonna be the death of me, looking at me so innocently, when I know how much you want daddy to have his way with you, don’t you, bunny? a needy bunny on my lap, fuck,”
you nodded again, whining and hiding your head against his neck when his hand lowered between your legs, tracing your inner thigh with a steady movement, like he wanted to savor it, take his time, but couldn’t wait any longer. “yes sir, wan’— wanna be with you, I—“
“know you do, bunny, i know sweet thing. only this old man knows how to treat you like the princess that you are, made of sugar. shit, having to talk to your dad when you’re around, acting like i don’t wanna throw his little girl over my shoulder and have my way with her, having to hold myself back. you on your little skirts that make me go mad, your fucking ribbons…”
you bit your lip and shuddered against him, blushing shyly at his words, that made your heartbeat quicken, go faster. he always treated you so well, like he was your bodyguard, like you were his little princess. a little helpless mewl left your lips, as you sought for his lips again, pressing another kiss on his mouth, that he quickly deepened — the kiss filled the car with lewd sounds, his tongue heavy and wet against yours, but you wanted more.
“please sir, please, anything,” you whimpered, and he cooed at you, letting out another deep chuckle that vibrated against your chest. your lips were puffy and red from his mustache and salt and pepper beard that scratched your skin.
”what do you want, doll? mmh? come on love, use your words, know you can.”
you were too shy to ask him or to address what you wanted, hoped the way you fluttered your lashes innocently could speak for you. “just you, daddy..and, and…”
he softened his hungry gaze when you trailed off, and caressed your thigh. “daddy can’t give you that now, love. you deserve more than a stolen moment in the midst of chaos. and definitely not here” with a gentle tug, he brought your hand to his lips, pressing soft kissed on your knuckles. “wanna get off on daddy’s thigh? like a good bunny? mmh?”
you nodded again, shyly yet eagerly this time. lifting the skirt of your sundress to shift your position, he sat you on his thigh, coming in contact with the denim of his jeans, and you shivered when you felt the muscle of his leg against your clothed clit. john leaned back, playfully patting your lower back.
“alright bunny, hands on my shoulders, like this; good girl. now, just move your hips, back and forth, like this— yeah. good girl, like this, fuck, can feel you, see? ‘s not hard, angel” his hands were heavy and secure on your waist, steadying your movements as he guided your hips to buck against his thigh.
you were new to the sensation, didn’t know how to move, but the friction made you whine slowly, almost inaudibly. not to his ears.
“feels good, bunny?”
“mmmhh” you nodded, rolling your hips against his thigh, searching more of that strange feeling. you lowered your head, your cheeks growing red, a bright blush that he could almost taste on his own lips. you were shy, inexperienced, a virgin, and john was the only one who could teach you everything you needed to learn.
“that’s it baby, make yourself feel good. take your time,”
“don’t know how—“ you whined, desperate for his help. his hands ached on your waist, wanting to hold you, to undress you, to grasp every inch of your soft skin with his rough hands. and it was torture, seeing you like that, whining and needy for your daddy’s help, having to physically stop himself from touching you freely :(
“you’re doing so well f’me, bunny, good girl, find out how you like it, yeah, sweetheart, you should see yourself right now. pure sunshine,” he squeezed your hips and you yelped, letting out a soft whimper, your thighs clenching against his, as you tried to steady your movements, your clit brushing against the denim and making your panties grow damp.
the familiar sound of your ringtone startled you, and you almost screamed when it echoed through the dark space of the car. you stopped your movements, catching your breath. blinking as if you’d just woken up from a dream, you crouched yourself towards the passenger seat and hastily grabbed your phone, taking it out of your pink purse.
dad. his name sparkled on the screen, and you felt john physically tense against you, the muscle of his jaw thickening when he saw his name. begrudgingly, you picked up, holding your phone against your ear with a loud heart thundering in your chest.
“dad?” you tried to breath normally, your cheeks felt burning hot, and your voice was shaky. “im…im almost home, yes, it went…”
you dared a shy look at John, whose jaw was clenched, and whose hand still hadn’t gotten off your bare thigh. “I’ll tell you tomorrow, I have the keys yes. You can go to sleep, im fine”
when he hung up, you loudly swallowed. you couldn’t believe what you’d been doing. straddling your dad’s best friend’s thigh, in his car. there was no way you could look at him in the eyes after that. your face blushed like it was on fire, and your eyes looked down at your ruffled skirt,
“I—I— thank you, sir Price, I’ll be going now—“ you stammered, your heart pounding like it never had before. you tried to reach out for your purse, but john quickly grabbed you by your chin, keeping your face in front of his — his think fingers sprawled over your jaw, and his voice was almost animalistic, a bare growl when he spoke against your lips. he was pissed, he felt like a dog who’d just been teased with a bone, just to have it taken away from him right before his eyes.
“when i do finally get my hands on you, doll, nothing and no one will take you from me, understand?”
you nodded, breathless.
“understand, doll?” he repeated, again, making you flinch with pleasure.
“yessir”
“good girl,” he rasped the word against your lips, before pressing a soft kiss on them. “now, goodnight, bunny, hop back to your pen.”
#john price#john price smut#john price x f!reader#john price x female reader#captain price x female reader#price x female reader#john price x y/n#call of duty
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okay yall sometimes I forget WHY I'm friends with people and then I suddenly remember and it's like.. woah-
FOR EXAMPLE!!! I have this friend and she used to be my best friend?? but we haven't really spoken that much this school year lol- and so ive been like?? 'should we still be friends??? we dont rlly click the way we used to'
but then!!! the story happens lol-
okay so like it's right before chemistry n its still lunch time and im being my usual self and then I'm demonstrating to magpie on how to get somebody to stop doing something that you don't want them to do bcuz like?? why not?
the tip is basically to be as loud/embarrassing as possible and so I decided I needed to demonstrate (as I, personally, am a visual learner so why not teach somebody in the way it works for me?) and I decide to try it on the es best friend I mentioned at the beginning??
so I go up to her and start telling her what happened like 20 minutes ago (year 7 ive been hanging out with crashed out on me after I squirted half her drink at her.. I SOUND LIKE AN ASS FOR THIS BUT I SWEAR THERE'S SOME CONTEXT YALL 😭😭🙏) and her eyebrows just get higher n higher n shes kinda "girl wth" -ed out
and then this other friend I have points it out and shes like "oh oopsies" and then we get a little.. uhm, silly? so like, I show her my shirt (which had gone somewhat see through due to the friend of the year 7 previously mentioned throwing HER drink at me) and then I'm like, "omg it's like, so wet.. feel it!!"
and so she places her hand on my school shirt real near my chest which is EXACTLY when i thought I had gotten her and so I go, "dang you really just can't get your hands off me, can you?" REALLY loudly and several people look over AND NORMALLY THIS IS WHEN THE OTHER PERSON GETS EMBARRASED?? WHICH WOULD'VE EFFECTIVELY TAUGHT MAGPIE HOW TO DO IT??? but then guess what girly does?
grips my shirt real tight and goes, "wow *name* I didn't expect you of all people to complain, normally you don't.. what's up today?"
JAW DROPPED.
LIKE ACTUALLY GOBSMACKED
MY FLABBERS WERE GASTED YALL.
THAT IS *NOT* A NORMAL OCCURANCE BETWEEN US (other friends maybe-) AND SHES NORMALLY NOT THE TYPE TO FLIRT WITH FRIENDS/PRETEND SHE DOES SEXUAL ACTS WITH THEM SO LIKE???
anyways she lowkey ate with that and I probably looked like an absolute wreck cuz she just laughed and booped my nose-
LIKE GIRL OKAYYY 😭😭🙏
BUT YAAAAA
#karmaajr rambles#yall I couldn't#MAGPIE LAUGHED AT MY REACTION BRO#mbmb but like. BEING GRIPPED BY MY SHIRT JUST RENDERRED ME SPEECHLESS AND YALL CANT BLAME ME FIR THATTTT 😭😭😭
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"now we got to choose who we want to be"
"like what?"
"whatever we want kid, whatever we want. "
and he chose to be her father.
#im not okay but like in the best way possible#thank you tbb and thank you hunter for surviving and becoming a sexy old man#grown up omega is so</33 hearybreakingly beautiful#techs death finally hitting me after a full year of positive denial chat this is gna be hard😭😭😭#the bad batch#tbb#the bad batch season 3#tbb season 3#tbb spoilers#the bad batch spoilers#star wars#star wars: the bad batch#tbb omega#tbb hunter#omega bad batch#hunter bad batch#sergeant hunter#tbb s3 spoilers#star wars tbb
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Vi is gifted kid burnout but in the english major way
#she’s the best characterization I’ve seen of gifted kid burnout outside of super-genius characters#like. as a burnt out gifted kid by legal designation. she is me#trying to succeed at everything because that’s what you’re told to do or what you think needs to be done to be worth anything to anyone#being rigid to change because it’s not being done right but at the same time accepting change so long as people stay with you#and also how that ties in with being an eldest sibling#because ik folks love the whole ‘gifted kid jinx’ thing (not me but ya’ll do you) but ya’ll—#YA’LL DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY NEED FOR BURNT OUT ACADEMIC VI—#because Vi never got the chance to be a kid and learn and grow and find what she actually enjoyed in the world outside of the last drop crew#but look at her. the way she speaks and the way she tried to teach powder the lessons she earned the hard way in the gentlest way possible#in the way she so desperately clings on to people and memories#my girl would be a WRITER#my girl would be writing poetry drunk in her shitty basement apartment after hooking up with a girl#my girl would be writing novellas in prison and getting her degree#because you know she sees the world like a romantic. her world is art and emotion and devotion. to her family. to anything she cares about#i need more literary! student vi. i need more academic vi. i need more grudging debate-team captain vi#i need vi getting her own place and having an extensive book collection that she develops because of the loneliness#Her gkb is going from a leader & soldier to someone who could be useful regardless to someone who is useless & being okay w/ it ->#to being needed again and not knowing how to handle it but knowing she refuses to fuck it up this time#GIVE ME VI W/ MY GIFTED KID ARCCCCCC#this probs makes no sense and is like 4 tangents but I’ll expand on it later ‘cause im tired#coherency is for losers and the well-rested#vi arcane#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#vi
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ARE THEY A WOMAN WHO LOVES WOMEN?


*TL;DR she is technically not a canon lesbian, so no, this poll does not break my rules. i am, however, going to treat her as canon sapphic due to the rule of BFFR. as a result, i have taken out the usual "they're not attracted to women" options. see tags if you want more detail
#poll#homura akemi#puella magi madoka magica#madoka magica#pmmm#wlw poll#sapphic poll#OKAY. SO.#i got an ask requesting every pmmm girl#which to be honest i was kind of dreading literally because of her. but i WILL see every request through if i can help it.#i agonized over this very very badly#did a bunch of reading and searching#the most i could scrape up is that her relationship and feelings towards madoka are STILL frustratingly ambiguous in terms of canonicity#despite being Extremely Freaking Blatant#anyway what i mean by 'rule of BFFR' is i am going to honor word of god as best i can. but i refuse to be obtuse.#i can accept that TECHNICALLY there's nothing saying she couldn't be wlw in a way that's not lesbian#i can accept seeing her as 'madokasexual' rather than specifically lesbian#or thinking of her as bi bc she hasn't interacted enough with men to rule it out or bc she would love madoka even if madoka wasn't a girl#but i am not going to concede to the possibility that she is just not wlw#that's too stupid even for me#sure you can argue she's not canon sapphic with a particularly stretchy train of logic! you can use logic to any end! but: BFFR!#hence. this poll may proceed.#sorry again if this makes like no sense i can never tell if im making sense or not
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Bro I’ll be so honest, I’ve just kinda been a silent observer of your profile for a while now, and I genuinely think you are the funniest person ever. Like everytime you post I need to make sure I’m alone because my family will yell at me for being too loud 😭😭
omg....... i love you............
no like this actually makes me so happy to hear,, thank you for telling me this. bc when im writing smaus it really does feel like im in an echo chamber where i've created like 10 versions of me all talking to each other and when its time to post it. i sit there and im like. is anyone but me going to actually like this shit..,....
#thank you for breaking your silence bc i needed this.....#also me searching up 'shadow sad. shadow in agony. shadow upset.' for a proper reaction image. it took a few tries but i got this one#the best way i can describe how it feels to write smaus in the most geniune way possible is that it feels like the wonderland system.#and each enha member is a different facet of my conciousness.#okay im gonna stfu now im just saying shit bc im really procrastinating my hw#anons ♡
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https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GZRIUk3aQAAGGgZ?format=jpg&name=large
Someone please tell me this is really happening👀🙏

[PROCEEDS TO RECREATE ISABELLE ADJANI GOING TITS OFF INSANE IN THE TUNNEL SCENE OF POSSESSION IN THE OFFICE BATHROOM]
WASN'T SEA ALSO SPOTTED AT THE GMMTV BUILDING TODAY AND WEREN'T THEY BOTH SEEN WITH P'THA TOO OH THEY WERE SO THERE TO DISCUSS THEIR NEW SERIES AND MAKE THE FINAL PREPARATIONS BEFORE FILMING THE MOCK TRAILER I CAN FEEL IT IN MY TIDDIES AND DEEP INTO MY HEART OF HEARTS IT’S TIME TO DUST OFF THE CLOWN SHOES AND SET THE WIG IN PLACE AND PUT THE MAKE UP ON (who am i kidding, it never came off, that shit’s permanent at this point) LIKE NOT TO BRING UP THE SIGNS AGAIN BUT THEY ARE INDEED SIGNING FR THIS TIME AND IM READY TO GO ABSOLUTELY BALLS TO THE WALL BATSHIT FUCKING CRAZY DERANGED ABOUT IT
EVEN WITH ALL OUR CLOWNERY WE WILL BE THE PREVAILING CLOWNS FOR ALL FUTURE CLOWNS TO LOOK UP TO AND THAT'S THAT ON THAT
#OKAY BUT LIKE SERIOUSLY#in 2024 they had to ride the last twilight hype train i get it whatever#but they can't let the JIMMYSEA HYPE die down now that it's at its peak#so not giving them a new series for 2025 wouldn't benefit anyone#SO LOOK AT ME @ P'THA#ANYWAY THANK YOU FOR SENDING ME THIS ANON IM NOW SPIRALLING IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE#I NEED THEM TO ANNOUNCE THE DATE FOR GMMTV 2025 SOON OR IM GONNA LIVEBLOG IT FROM THE PSYCH WARD#ANYWAY x2. i hope you're having a wonderful day anon!!!!! 💜#jimmy jitaraphol#jimmysea#gmmtv 2025#m: ask
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QSMP kidnappings
THEY HAVE A PROBLEM
have you noticed just how much kidnapping there is in QSMP?
here is the list:
1.Forgot how many but all the frozen ppl
2.the worker BBH kidnaped
3.Fred
4.Quackity
5.evryone on purgatory
6.a code monster aperently
7.all of the eggs. More than once
8:trapping phill in a fucking birdhouse
9. team bolas kidnapped tina
conclusion: kidnapping is good ,as long as its for plot
#qsmp federation#qsmp#qsmp eggs#qsmp purgatory#qsmp cucurucho#its concerning#like why are there so many#someone needs to talk to quackity#cause this is not okay#and no#im not over the bird house shit#that was horrible#but in the best way possible#whenever someone gets kidnapped i am adding it to this post
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i ship inhun in a way that differwnt and more swagful than anyone else btw.
#TBFHHHHH i know i know i knowwww i say a lot. but i dont even ship in in the traditional sense#i dont think it will b canon and i dont rlly WANT it to b canon. its just insane like ZAMNNNNN why r u looking at each other like thatatttt#i dont think that if (IF) inho reveals his identity gihun is gonna magically b like Oh my god… okay well i like u now. more the opposite#and i dont think inho genuinely likes gihun all that much. i think hes obsessed w him in a way that borders on it but. u know#to inho gihun mostly just represents the parts of himself hes locked away. hes like the person inho used to be or cld have been#i think he DOES want whats best for gihun but like. just in his own opinion#to him whats best is to just.. pretend these issues dont exist and move on.#i think being wrapped up in the games is sickening no mattter what side ur on and he knows this. and just wants gihun to forget#i also do think he sees Something special in gihun. but its not like Ahhhh come and rule by my side 😈 LOL#yeah like i said. the recognition of the self. DONT GO DOWN THIS PATH MAN FUCK OFFFFFF#um. also yeah gihun i dont think wld have such a thrn around to like date himmmm oh my god lol#i think its likely hell end up Not killing inho for various reasons and possibly even leaving room for redemption#but yeah i dont think he wld ever trust him even. i dont think he wld let all that slide 😭😭😭#gihun x youngil is bantssss. but not real at all sadly#rhe best fic i read of them was a pre series fic where inho wasnt the front man yet. and he met gihun by chance#and kinda used him to convince himself that what he was doing was right. For The Greater Good etc#i cant remember what it was called but it was sooo good i need to find it sometime#sniff….. living in a sad world where every body mischaracterises them sooooo bad and evil.#THE BEST INHUN CONTENT was the animation of them over the megamind breakup scene. MY GOD#ill be honest. igaf abt their dynamic soooo hard but htemain reaosn i ‘ship’ them is bc theyre both INSANELY FINE. AND I NEED THEM BADLY#and. im obsessed w them separately. so of course they are making out sloppy style in my mind#ill b honest as well i dont think gihun is in the right state of mind for aany of That AT ALLLL rn either.#and as well w inho not being intersted in that way. and also he shot his brother bc it was aconflict of interests. btw.#whatever tho lol the memes and shit r funny as fuckkkkk so idc. keep fucking#anyways sangihun 🔛🔝 for fucking everrrrrer in terms of an actual ship#tho i dont think they wld ever be canon either. well i mean. for obvious reasons#but also bc i dont PERSONALLY think sangwoo wld ever allow himself that. BYE#idk idk idk maybe i am wrong and i know nothing.#SORRY. ik i am fighting invsisible demons again i just saw a post abt Sickos who know Nothing abt the Themes…. NO GUYS.. PROMMY THATS NOT ME
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As for my post this morning. If anyone was worried. Me personally I'm okay (I guess) but my dad's in the hospital and things r still very up in the air. So.
#speculation nation#bracing myself for the possibility of Major Grief.....2!!!!#well actualy more like 3 or 4 or 5 (lol lol lol)#but likely the worst one bc it's. my dad. that's my dad.#i left work early to visit him at the hospital. hes stable rn at least (he wasnt this morning)#he wasnt conscious though. and i really really hope he ends up okay#but. i still saw my dad unconscious in a hospital bed hooked up to like a million tubes and#thats my dad. Thats my Dad.#im really trying to not do my processing until after i know for sure how things are gonna go#dont wanna start grieving until after he's officially gone#so im trying not to think about it. but it's still... yeah. unpleasant.#and theres a part of me thats so so resentful. if i have to have a dead parent why would it be the Good one?#take my fucking mom instead. hell my life would even be BETTER without her. horrible as that is to say.#but it's my dad. he's not perfect. he has his flaws. but he's still tried in a way she never ever did.#seeing him like that makes me feel so... small. makes me remember being picked up by him.#makes me remember riding on the back of his harley as a tiny little 10 year old with a helmet that was giant on me#we'll hope for the best. we'll hope for a recovery. even if not a full recovery. i just want to have my dad.#sorry. this is probably too real for my tumblr dot com. it's just been... a lot today.#negative/#death/#hospitals ment/#idfk. sorry
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youtube
OMG
#WHERE DO I BEGIN#CHRONOLOGICALLY I GUESS#omg the whiplash beat is so insane so addicting literally a cyperpunk meets vogue and make it SICKENING af#i'm so happy i can always trust in my girls to deliver with the title tracks that's so crazy#they have an incredible run#NEXT#KILL IT !!!!!!????? DONT PISS ME OFFFFFFFFFF#literally if i could craft a perfect cunty badass aespa bside it would sound somewhat exactly like this ....#it's so good i'm in awe i can't imagine how good the rest will be#FLIGHTS NOT FEELINGSSSS#the floating figure on her back so true that's me levitating when the song came through my headphone speakers#i will be soooooooo annoying about that song that's literally such an henna song you guys wouldn't understand#time to make that my entire personality#the sme rnb goodness on the beat???????????? don't piss me off#PINK HOODIE#OKAY a fun track i like it maybe not as much as the previous ones but bet i'm gonna be addicted to it when it comes out#it's kinda reminding me of earlier piwon bsides but edgier?? if that makes sense?? but i mean this in the best way possible#FLOWERRSSSSS#AGAIN i neeeeed someone to gif that dancing girl from the video for me ARE YOU JOKING SHES ME#like ae ning dancing like that one kermit the frog meme PLEASEEEE I NEEED ITTTTTT#also the song literally sme rnb perfection again this album is perfect#obsessed!!!!!#JUST ANOTHER GIRL#OMG SCREAM ANTHEM#i hooooooope they play this at the concert so i can scream it with them i looooove it!!!!!!!#licorice sister that has her room right across from hers and with sparkly letters on her door#CONCLUSION this albums is already perfect i couldn't have wished for better tracks i'm seriously so pumped#so much rnb goodness im so happy sm finally listened and gave the girls the bsides they deserve!!!!!!!!!!!#thank you for coming to my ted talk everyone#if you made it this far i love you <3
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i am just...so profoundly tired of being me
#char.txt#there is something that is so revolting about me I am incapable of shaking the shame of it#Theres nothing i can do to make myself happy its just not possible i think i have to accept that#but im tired of pretending for other people its so stupid#everything feels fake even when im being honest i dont know who this person is anymore#its just stupid idk im thinking about too many things#my life feels like it exists for other peoples entertainment and if im not interesting im failing and im wasting peoples time and energy#but i can't be alone anymore I legitimately cannot be alone anymore ive tried so hard it only makes things worse#I need to feel wanted and maybe its something im missing thats keeping me from feeling that way#but I feel so deeply that when i stop being funny or when the person ppl actually want to talk to comes around ill stop being relevant#i dont exist to people when im not infront of them and...idk i have to be okay with that because im never anything more#and like this genuinely isnt a dig because there are people who I am friends with who have access to see this and I don't want you to feel#like its something youve done cause its not your fault its kind of not even about any of you or the ppl wholl never see this#Its something im missing its something about me and i dont deserve cruelty ik that#but i can't make anyone want me more than they do and thats alright#i just know that ill always be second fiddle at best and it just exausts me sometime#its be easier if I liked me but I wouldnt wish my presence upon anyone#but im selfish and i need the attention or ill actually self destruct so here we are this is my boulder
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went to the theater today and did not watch either Barbie or Oppenheimer but a secret third thing (2022 chinese suspense drama Lost in the Stars/消失的她 (it was good and i liked it))
#had to go all the way into the city for it but worth it#as usual with cn films there was no poster advertising it and it was shoved in a corner#i spent a good portion of the run time trying to figure out if the male lead was tony leung before realizing he was like two decades too#young oops#anyways! i thought the plot was good and the weird things i brushed off as just part of story telling actually make sense in light of the#solution#also lawyer chen is peak girlboss in the best way possible#im in love with her okay??#lost in the stars
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Listening to Girl in Red's i wanna be your girlfriend on repeat in my room alone rn. No reason. Just for funsies.
#me when i LIE#actually sobbing because I think I have a crush on my best friend but I don't think she likes me like that#but really I'm not sure because she's been more friendly with me lately adn has been dropping what MIGHT be hints#also we already technically dated but that was when I was a boy and also in like seventh grade so#would she think it's wierd for us to date again?#also i might be dropping what she might be seeing as hints but really aren't#like I told her my favorite girl in red song is i wanna be your girlfriend#because we were talking about girl in red#which i am okay with her seeing as a hint#but also i was joking about how i like dick because i do because when i think dick i think girl dick but when she thinks dick#she thinks man dick and she went#wait arent you a lesbian? and i am but everytime this comes up the conversation changes before i can plead my case#so now im worried she thinks thats a hint that i dont like her because shes cis and i dont make jokes about how i like pussy because#imposter lesbian syndrome#also we were having a class meeting about prom and she said TWICE#id like to be on the prom court#and BOTH TIMES i not only didnt pick up the possible hint i fucking BUNGLED it and accidentally shut her down by saying#no way me too#but i think we'd have to go with guys ew#cause you know they dont do two queens or two kings#but our school does let you choose what ballot you want to be on#so ive been wondering if we could go together and one of us signs up on the king list and just dresses butch#the problem with that is i would want to do a rock paper scissors#hehe scissors lesbian#thing and thats how we decide who will be butch#but i cant risk losing because i dont pass well enough to pull off a suit as a girl#i wouldnt want to force her to do that though#even though she would probably look cute in a suit#raven caws
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#do i get annoyed by my housmates? yeah#do i think they are geniuenly kind lads? also yeah#sometimes its like... is this your first time living with people?#but they try their best to be helpful and are nice to chat with#and one of them is a musician and i really like when he practices cause hes got a great voice#i would prefer to live with nonmen for sure and possibly with friends but its okay for now#so much of my life is like okay for now#but i am miserable here either way#im fucking trying#thats all#personal
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my ability to open up to people may be locked behind rusted-shut doors with a special lock, but girl am i equipping the bolt cutter and crow bars
#a biscuit's rambles#i actually talked to my best friend about some of my troubles#and man. its nothing anyone can fix. like genuinely thats just an issue with the way things currently Are#and she couldnt help of course and she also has her problems. but girl talking about it helped so much#i was barely holding it together and then i vety awkwardly opened up a little for the first time ever possibly (aside from my parents)#and like. im still exhausted but im actually Doing Okay again#and anyway what i wanna say is#im teaching myself to be open with people i trust and love and giving them the same amount of trust as they place in me#and its fucking hard but its worth it and even if many parts of me still protest I Am Doing It#im gonna take care of myself and let others care who explicitly signed up for that and if i have to drag myself there kicking and screaming
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