#im not even sure ive answered the question lmao
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Flash news: if you want help from someone, be nice to them lol
#like really if u want me to help u out then ask nicely ._. idc if we're the bestest of friends if u want help then use common courtesy#like my roommate wanted me to tell her what a process was and by the time i was trying to think shes like ??? omg answer my question ????#did u finish ur studies or not??? and since i was engrossed in thinking i hummed at the question and when she asked it again i said i hadnt#fully revised yrt#and shes like u say u have one time and then u dont the other like !!! girl im trying to think of an answer for u 😭#and then one of my other roommies rightfully says how everyone is stressed and that shes being unnecessarily edgy to which she replies#that she just wanted to ask me question regarding the syllabus and then proceeds to angrily ask me the question again#._. and im like wow dude ur so nice#shes all like i wAs NiCe tHe FiRsT tImE bUt thEn yOU decided to test my patience#and that pissed me off so much i didnt bother answering her question#and now shes trying to talk to me normally like she didnt do anything and im ignoring her 🙄#the thing that also annoys me is that she constantly assumes ive finished everything and got no need to study just because i got a sentum#in ONE 50 mark test#how does that help with this 100 mark test... gosh i cant even fathom how some people act im p sure if i asked so rudely to her#shed lose all her marbles lmao.#dawn.txt#tbd
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their s/o is a teacher! - nct dream
a/n: lmao ig im just gonna have to ignore that hate ive been getting! I'm gonna write for nct dream this time because for some reasons some MOA's are not being very kind towards my work. That is not an attack towards MOA because I am one of the biggest MOA's I know...it's jut not fair that some of the people I should be cool with are being so incredibly rude...over and over. anyways, that is all from me on that. please enjoy! as always, requests are open!
(I'm gonna add a cut off here so if you don't wanna read, you don't have to)
☆ mark lee ☆
he thinks it's so cute, especially if you teach little ones (kindergarten/1st grade)
he loves asking you about your classroom and how your work is going
he even helps you grade students assignments and he loves seeing what they say on their assignments
he also likes seeing their art work
he meets your students when you have a classroom part and he helps you set up
they immediately start to ask 100 questions, like kids do, ad he is totally okay with it.
he enthusiastically answers all their questions and they love him
they always ask for him every day after that
☆ huang renjun ☆
renjun thinks it's funny if you teach middle school
he is too good at listening to what happened during your day
he laughs at all the stories of students running around and causing chaos
he love's looking at the assignments you give them and tries to do them himself
he whines when he can't get something right and whines even more when you tell him you students got 100% on that question
☆ lee jeno ☆
he's one that thinks you teaching the older ones is cool
you're actually a college professor so he think's that's WAY cooler
he enjoys hearing you talk about the subject you teach and love's to hear you talk about your students and the assignments you gave them
when you offer to give him a your of the campus you work at, he is jumping at the chance
he even buys gear from the university you work at and wears it all the time (the letterman style jacket you got him is his favorite! he wear's it often and even wore it during a soundcheck of one of nct dream's concerts).
you bump into a few students and say hello, introducing jeno as your boyfriend
☆ na jaemin ☆
you teach kindergartners and he adores it
you helps you set up the different bulletin boards in your classroom and helps you organize/set up everything else
he loves to ask you about your lesson plans and you always ask him for ideas for activities and he helps you every time
he really want's to meet the little ones so after the year is done and they are graduating, he attends the event
they ask you, "teacher, who is that handsome man you were with? is that your boyfriend?"
they all giggle and go "ooooo!" and you tell them yes, that's him!
they run to meet him after the ceremony
☆ lee haechan ☆
he would probably find it interesting if you teach high schoolers
since the first time you told him about all your students, he always asks about them and want's you to update them about how they're doing
his favorite thing to do for your students is to send them stuff!
he gives you money so you can buy them snacks for your classroom (and other supplies! my teachers in high school always had sanitary pads, tampons, snacks, and other stuff in them in case students needed them)
he wants to help you make sure your students feel safe in their classroom
he also funds the senior pizza party at the end of the year and even makes an appearance!
☆ zhong chenle ☆
I believe Chenle is also good with little ones since he's always posting with his family (especially his, I believe, little nephew)
he love's helping you choose coloring pages for your students to do when they're done with their minute math sheets (the stress it causes is always rewarded with coloring time!)
he also likes to buy nice supplies for you students
you tell hi not to do it, because kids love to break things and lose them, but he doesn't listen
he love's going supply shopping (he get's all the brand names like Crayola :0)
he also helps grade assignments!
☆ park jisung ☆
you teach middle school and he loves it
he loves hearing the stories of your students acting out during class because it makes him giggle
just give him a glare and he will stop laughing at your misfortune
he helps you grade their papers
sighs every time he get's a that says 'idk'
it's all fun and games until get's those papers...then he wants to flip the kitchen table other and help you quit your job
because he knows how much they stress you out, he's always making sure you're distressing at home.
fetching you a warm cup of coffee/tea, making/buying dinner, giving you massages, helping you with other class stuff.
#nct dream imagines#nct imagines#nct fluff#nct dream#mark x reader#renjun x reader#jeno x readers#jaemin x reader#haechan x reader#chenle x reader#jisung x reader
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okay!!! oakland show post!
i had so so much funnnn it was the best night ever!!! i went alone and was pretty nervous because even though ive been to shows and concerts alone before, i'd never been to something that had so much "waiting time" like between the m&g and preshow & show, but truly everyone was so so friendly, and it was so easy to meet people and make friends in line, so if anyone is still wondering if they should get a ticket and are worried about going alone, DO IT. it's so worth it, and phannies are lovely <3
so the m&g! this is my first time meeting both of them so i was so nervous and so excited. the line moved faster than i was prepared for it to (sarah was at the front of the line making sure everyone had their cameras ready and knew what they wanted to get signed. i'm so face blind i kept thinking about how familiar she looked but didn't realize that was sarah until it was almost my turn lmaooo), but the actual interaction didn't feel rushed. i gave them the letters i had written for them. i had tried to get metallic green envelopes but couldn't find any, and i told them that, and dan immediately knew what i was talking about and pointed knowingly at phil lmao <3
i brought tabinof and a mini lesbian flag which was between the pages in case they'd have time to sign both and they did! while they were signing i asked my questions. i asked phil for book recs and he said project hail mary, which i think he's mentioned in a preshow before. he said it's space/sci fi and he really liked it. i asked dan his thoughts on this f1 season, and he said "i think it's been quite a good season! it started off and it was like 'max is gonna win everything' and then it was like 'no he's not 🤪'"
and then dan took our selfies, and i'm rly happy with how they turned out 🥺 so here's them being cute sans me lol
they are indeed really good at making you feel comfortable and just generally being very nice and chill. they sounded more british than i was expecting? which is crazy given i allegedly know exactly what they sound like having watched their videos for 12 years, but still, hearing it up close was still kinda crazy. they are indeed very spindly, im glad i wore platforms so i was at least a little bit taller than i usually am
i Did forget to ask phil my follow up question which was if he would ever do a book recs video/livestream, and i also forgot to tell them that the sappy shit and also some recs for boston food is in the letters, but w/e they'll read those sooner or later, and at least i rmred the most important things. oh also phil's blue eyed stare really is So intense, i can definitely see how his aura can be intimidating (but he rly was so sweet <3). dan is so teddy bear vibes though, not intimidating at all <3
i was towards the end of the m&g line, so after my m&g ended, preshow started ~45 minutes later. the energy at this preshow felt rly married and silly, it was so fun. they definitely have someone prune the phlit questions (but im not sure if whoever does it just grabs them randomly or if they actually read and pick which ones dnp read), since not all of my questions were answered. but i cant complain bc they answered two of mine, which i'll post the videos for tn. but i asked if they're digital hoarders, and they said no (liars), and then dan talked about how phil's desktop is disorganized. and i also asked about their fave recent horror movie, and they both said the substance, which i've been wanting to watch!
and oh my god the show itself was CRAZY. like even though i've been looking at spoilers this entire time, i still wasn't fully prepared (maybe i'll put my more spoilery thoughts in a reblog later). they were so energetic, and their stage presence is magnetic. i think it was a good night for them, as far as i remember, no lines were obviously Forgotten, and any tripping over lines was minor. the show had silly parts, it had serious parts, it was just so Them. you really can feel how comfortable and happy they feel in this new era and, like they talked about in the phukbang, that they feel that their audience is truly Theirs now. the show was so good i Did log onto ticketmaster and google flights to san diego after work today but due to flight prices and work, i fear it's not happening, but god i do want to see it again immediately 😔
finally, thank you to all the wonderful phannies i met!!! i had such a lovely time chatting w/carolina, esmeralda, orion, and winter, who aren't on tumblr 😔 and of course with molly @finalfeudfiend!!! we were seat neighbors, partners in phannie crimes for the night, and also they took my m&g video (mwah mwah tysmmmm molly <333). it was really so great to meet everyone, and all my worries about going alone were totally unfounded <3
here are the bracelets and photocards i got! the far left bracelet is from the vip merch bag, and the rest are from phannies, they say super amazing project, sister daniel, and father philip. i am sooo happy with my photocard pulls. the top row were from the pack that came w/vip merch, and the bottom row i got separately. impossible to pick faves really, but some of mine are of course uni hoodies, holographic hearts tongue out phil, phil looking so polite, and smiley peace sign dannie <333
and that's that! much love to dnp and phannies for making it such a wonderful night. having watched their videos for so long, it was so special to get to see and meet them, i had the best time ever <333
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Okay got a quick question
How do you feel about main character(s) in stories being a “reincarnated” form of the main antagonist
vs
The main characters being coincidental heroes who were forced into the position, making their existence unnecessary but their actions still mandatory
OHH THESE ARE GREAT ACTUALLY,,
Pretty sure ive seen these similar plots in isekai animes bc i keep seeing them around they are EVERYWHERE 😭
Ok ANYWAY im not sure how to really explain it since i like both concepts
What catches my attention the most are the mc being reincarnated from an antagonist. I really like antagonists in general and especially those who chose to change and have an entire redemption arc but they would never be able to escape from the mistakes of their past. I mayy be going off topic here sorry lmfao 💀 and reincarnation is really cool too i love it
As for the second one i love characters being forced into being the 'hero'. Like damn poor guy, bro didnt even asked for that 😭. Good angst potential. Ive got a few ocs who falls into that category!
But it also depends on how the story is written overall. Like, really good plot but very poorly written or poorly executed. I love good writing and will eat that up like a fine full course meal 👍
Sorry if this isnt like, the exact answer you're expecting 💀im not really sure what you mean or if you wanted to hear my insights on those two or compare them??so i ended up just, rambling oops LMAO
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For the fic writer asks:
4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES
5. Did you outline it?
7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?
25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share
omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!
4: Rambling about research!
do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?
man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.
there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.
once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."
(it means "get ahead.")
the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.
5: Did you outline the fic?
(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)
i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.
but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!
7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?
i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.
25: Share your favorite line
oh god, i have so many haha.
“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao
“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4
"His majesty is pleased." ch.5
“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7
“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11
“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11
“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14
26: Share your favorite detail
how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.
Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).
Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3
Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao
and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.
27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story
i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:
Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.
this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).
all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.
Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.
Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.
as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).
also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”
fic writer asks
#yooooo#this took me a long time to answer lol#i gotta go to bed but#THANK YOU SO MUCH TJ!!#dreamling#(why not. there's a lot here let put it out into the main tag!)#fic: bolt in the blue#im so satisfied ahhh thanks again#:)
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coming back online to share to the world my list of evan things. if you relate to most these things i title you Evan Rosier Kin
note: all of these are headcanons and may not align with how you perceive evan. most of these are inspired by like tiktoks and stuff, but otherwise its mostly things based on me because i literally remind myself of evan so much
another note: phrasing of these may be harsh!! im not targetting anyone fyi, and i dont mean harm, but i wrote most of these in a fit of self-hatred and when i reread them, i realised "hey, this sounds like evan lol" so i brushed it up a bit, but there might still be harsh wording and accusations
last note!!!: i have no fucking personality and im using this to self-reflect so my fault lmao
wants to be an overachiever, a hard worker, but in reality is just a gifted kid who hasn't fully burned out and is too lazy to actually work hard.
30000 different genres of songs on spotify. wonders if that means you have no personality.
sometimes wonders if people would miss you when you’re gone. doesn't think so.
knows 6 different languages, not good at any.
can't take criticism.
ambiverted. wonders if this means you have no personality.
likes a style, but isn't sure you would look good in it.
supposed ‘smart and nice’ kid, but that's who you were 4 years ago. people still hold the same view of you.
high standards. you've been brainwashed into thinking u can meet them but sometimes, u aren't so sure.
covers the parts of your face u dont like with hair. bonus points if it's a regular ass haircut like a fringe and your parents hate it.
gets overly clingy in friendships. not like physically clingy but mentally?? if you get me
wanna be insomniac. thing is, it just takes you a bit longer to fall asleep.
fluctuating confidence levels
feels like a second choice, always.
cringe culture holds you back from enjoying what you want to enjoy.
the people around you don't seem to care as much as you do. whenever you succeed, you look back and no one is cheering like you always do. sometimes, it feels like you are average or lower, but the people you are compared to are simply even lower and that's why you are supposedly ‘good’.
*does well* “duh, *** is always so good. they don't deserve praise” *doesn't do well or actually just does average* “*** DIDNT DO WELL OHHHH”.
when someone compliments you, you feel pressured to uphold their standard and wonder how long it'll take till they realise you arent so good.
EXAMPLE because my wording is shit: someone told me i was funny and since then ive been scared to text him because i was like 'oh fuk what if when i talk to him next im not funny enough'
deathly afraid of being cheesy/cliche. this holds you back from showing much affection, especially romantic.
shoes are worn half to death.
your answer to theoretical questions is always ‘depends’. wonders if that means-
everyone thinks your friends ‘influence’ you, but really you’re as whack as them, just not as obvious.
a group of people you hate significantly less than everyone else, and one person you love
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fic writer twenty questions!!!
I got tagged by the beautiful lovely gorgeous @tapemonkey21 who has written some of my fav star wars fics to date and who got me on the cody/obi-wan/satine train without which my current wip would not exist <333
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
55!
2. What's your AO3 word count?
812,034 😵💫
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Rn only star wars with Ahsoka in it, but I've written for TLOU and PJO too!
4. What are your top five fics by kudos?
Under Freezing Stars
have my back, yeah, every day
Violent Heart
invisible string
For Real This Time
5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?
Yesssss!!! I honestly love responding to comments just as much as reading them. I like chatting with people and hearing their thoughts and their theories and what they want to happen next!! I think it makes it more fun for everyone but especially for me hehe
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
and the waves come crashing down for sure. I'm really not an angsty ending kind of person except with that fic lol
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Roman Holiday has the cheesiest mushiest most ridiculous holiday fluff ending ever <3
8. Do you get hate on fics?
haha yea 😭 messed up some niche details in my star wars fic and got absolutely lambasted in the comments lmao i never wanted to post sw again 😭 but then i realized i just needed to find the gay people and it all worked out lol
9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?
I would say I'm retired from smut writing lmao 😭 but idk maybe something will change. i am not typing out the gory details of everything ive written on here I have no desire to get cancelled again
10. Do you write cross overs? What's the craziest one you've written?
No but I do write AU fusions <3 my favorite stupid insane one was a James Potter/Lily Evans Batman universe fusion fic it lowkey ate but I had to hide it because I was embarrassed at the quality and the very just-took-sociology-101 level of social commentary 😭
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
I don't think so???? back in the day maybe lol
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
No but I have had a few podfics of my fics made and that is my absolute most favorite thing ever ever 🥹
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
yes with my wonderful beautiful brilliant best friend forever who shares half of my brain @captain-jackson
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
all-time...,, whew. rn it's definitely Codywan. Idk if I have an all-time transcendent one that I always come back to tbh. I'm really more into platonic relationship dynamics than ships tbh
15. What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever wilI?
God, I have one re-writing the Zygerria arc where Ahsoka sneaks onto the mission instead of being incorporated into it that i want to finish SO BAD. when the ties that bind is done I'm really going to hammer it out because I do love it but its kind of a monster.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I'm good with dialogue and characterization and, on occasion, plot twists.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I hate writing filler. I can't do it for the life of me, which means I also tend to have pretty poor pacing. im also bad at ending scenes which is why many times my chapters will end with my characters falling asleep 😭
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?
jesus fucking christ it's so hard. doing it for Mando'a is hard and it's not even a real language. Usually I just go for the itallics but sometimes it's nice to have the immersion (which only works if you do it perfectly lol)
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I did not stake out the username "timelesslords" back in 2013 for the answer to this question to NOT be Doctor Who
20. Favorite fic you've ever written?
cheating and doing my fav from my three main fandoms:
Under Freezing Stars because it was the first long piece of fiction I ever finished, and without it I would not have made three of my best friends in the whole world so its very special and important to me
if you never bleed you're never gonna grow is one where I feel like I did something interesting and innovative with form and perspective and I'm really proud of it. I feel like a lot of times as a fic writer you can feel like what you're doing is repetitive and this one felt really unique to me!
The Ties That Bind is still a WIP but I honestly really love it and have been loving the process of writing it a lot. it's the first WIP I started posting without having at least 75% of the fic completed and it's been really interesting to see what a different process it is pre-writing vs writing as you go! Also, I love the plot contrivance that makes up the premise, I love working out all the little butterfly effects of that decision, I love making it gay and poly and I love writing a million different perspectives!!!
this was so super fun I miss doing tag games like this hehe :3 low pressure tags @bbyannabeth @lena-hills @bookishjules @captain-jackson & anyone else who wants to consider urself tagged by me :3
#lexi writes sometimes#fic reccing my own fics lfg#ty kat for tagging me this was so fun <333#tag game#long post
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Hey, how are you doing? Firstly, i'll understand if you choose not to answer this ask since the subject is controversial and kinda heavy
We currently have at least two pedos in the story, like, actual pedos (the guy obsessed with Liliana and the creepy butler that i forgot the name) and then tappei's writing in some things is just... weird?
I get that subaru and beatrice are supposed to have a sibling relationship, but it just weirds me out
And he keeps adding loli characters with questionable designs too
What is your opinion on this? Its something i manage to ignore, but it still weird me out a little
hi anon!! :o thanks for asking how im doing pfft im doing pretty well - though i am a college student and its This Time of Year (end of semester) so im hanging in here lmao 👍
also ok as for the topic at hand!! yeah no i 100% hate it. ive been thinking about rezeros flaws lately because the further you get into watching/reading rezero the Clearer it gets. its mostly fine at say, arc 1, but by the time you get to arc 5 or arc 8 its like. What the hell. This again?? so yeah its 100% understandable to be weirded out and uncomfortable by it because tappeis writing is frankly Gross sometimes.
(okay also yes this ask has minor or major arc 5+ spoilers yes and also. You know. detailed discussion regarding rezero sexualizing children.)
yeah so tappei writes problematic things into rezero regarding both women and children especially, and while theres exceptions its like. very Prevalent in rezero. i talked about it a bit in my last ask if youd like to check that out!! but yeah like. i hate how children are treated in rezero. its very Problematic a lot of the time.
tappeis writing follows very similar patterns regarding treatment of children and women that you see in a Lot of other anime/manga/japanese media - and media in general, really, but im sure most anime watchers / manga readers will know what im talking about because its unfortunately That common. we're all seen this. like fan service shots, lolis and shotas, etc etc. but rezero is a little more insidious i think, just because tappei is capable of writing good characters regardless of age or gender. and theres Less of stuff like fan service - or at least rezero is a little less obvious about it or its just seen less in rezero, but thats also because media in general is so in your face about it and Unfortunately Common so rezero looks like a tiny bit of paradise in the middle of a barren desert.
i mean look at the amount of people who've thought rezero was a harem anime until they watched rezero - rezero seems like an outlier but thats only because its just a tiny bit less gratuitous and it still has a lot of good writing. and also because i am pretty sure the bar for media like this - especially media in rezeros genre (isekai) is Extremely Low. like depressingly low. and despite rezero being a deconstruction of isekai, rezero also contradicts its own damn messages sometimes about treating others like the People they are, respecting others Personhood, treating women well, etc. and its easy to see that the moment you look at some of otsuka's artwork and designs for rezero or if you look at all the rezero merch mainly based around the girls and Sexualizing the girls and its like. my god this is a little depressing to look at. rezero is just a tiny step in the right direction away from say, misogynist shounen/seinen media thats also weird about kids or something, but then rezero trips and falls on its own face after taking several right moves.
the problem is that these problematic aspects are still there, theyre still clear to see if youre paying attention, and often character arcs start well but then fall flat despite the good foundation. and then the problematic aspects hammer the already Poor/Inconsistent Writing into the ground which it makes it Even Worse.
like louis is a great character. shes fascinating, really. and then you hit arc 7 and she regresses immediately into the mind of a toddler so we only get to see her amnesiabaru/Suffering From Rbd arc in arc 6, her confrontation with subaru, and then BAM its arc 7 time and now she is an entirely different person????? i remember raging the further i got into arc 7/8 and realizing she hasnt gotten any development, she just changed instantly. it just feels lazy to me!! unless tappei proves me wrong and writes her developing but right now louis has spent two goddamn arcs being subaru and rems loli prop/daughter prop/a plot device to use in battle, basically. okay sorry i got passionate there but i SWEAR it gets on my nerves a bit. the louis/spica conflict now would feel so much more thrilling if she didnt have her weird half assed arc 7 development.
like if i was really in the fantasy world, of course i wouldnt vote to kill spica, shes innocent now. she doesnt know shit about her crimes, shes a whole other person now. she didnt do those things. she is an innocent child. i did a poll on this a while back actually haah and yeah a lot of rz tumblr, including myself, voted to let her live for this reason!! but also like. narratively speaking. i do not care about spica at all. shes a blank slate, shes just there to move the plot, she is taking up space in the plot right now and she does not need to be here forever. i 1000% want her dead hah. yeah shes this cute little kid now, but again, she got zero development. why should i care about her?? all the interesting things about her in arc 6, all the potential that couldve happened out of her gradually going from her arc 6 self to someone who genuinely cares about rem and subaru is gone. If we actually saw this change, personally id care more about spica and be invested in her character but as it stands im really Not. and i think if we saw her actually Develop a lot of us readers would be more invested to see this conflict out - not only because our Favs are fighting over it, but also because we’d actually care about spica. Like. im not sure how many people actually care about louis past arc 6, but yeah thats just my personal thoughts on it.
And also the Other big flaw with louis’s character is tappei once again being creepy regarding kids and. Okay im gonna show an excerpt from the arc 6 WN (iirc ch60 to be exact?) and yeah fair warning because it is once again sexualizing a child (louis). But also im putting it here in case anyone wants to see some vivid proof of rezero being weird about kids. Im not sure if this was cut from the LN version or not but the fact that it exists At All makes me want to put tappei on a watchlist.
And okay i know you might be thinking about how louis represents the sin of gluttony anyway and gluttony includes sexual or romantic desire too and how having louis, who looks like a child, say this makes it even more Offputting - like. Yeah. but is it Necessary? because making louis, WHO LOOKS LIKE A CHILD, say all this and then use descriptors like “expressed a bewitching smile unsuited to her age” - is this Actually necessary? You have to be careful writing this sort of thing, because a child/character who looks like a child saying things like this due to being, you know, Mentally Unwell, is different from Emphasizing What Theyre Saying By Sexualizing Them via the narration and descriptions. And why is the sexologist line there?? its just frankly uncomfortable, to an unnecessary extent, i think. I just dont think we need all this emphasis on louis’s body, louis’s apparent “arousal”, or how her smile is “unsuited to her age” (this is the narrative once again sexualizing a child), and plot-related sex/sexual content in rezero is kept to a minimum anyway so you could also literally just have louis be weird about “loving subaru” without the sexual aspect. Because she literally just said that she was aroused by him. she looks like shes twelve at most and then in the arc immediately after this one she regresses back to having the mentality of a toddler!!! and then shes subaru’s daughter there.
And again, i know that the whole point of this scene is to be off-putting and disturbing and wrong in all sorts of ways (and also subaru tries to kill louis a page later so like.) but i think if youre going to keep the appetite=sexual desire detail (which IS a good point about gluttonys nature, on its own), then this scene absolutely needed to be handled better than what we got when the character saying this is a child. you can write a child sexualizing herself because shes frankly Unwell or Doesnt Know Better, because this is fiction and you can write sensitive topics like this with proper care, but if you, the author, are sexualizing this child, then that is a Whole Other Thing.
or you can entirely dodge this whole debate over whether or not this is actually okay to write by making louis look older. but tappei went with this route once again in a sea of rezeros various child characters despite the fact that tappei then decides to link sexual desire to the sin of gluttony, which is a sin occupied in rezero by three children. I know ley has a very traumatic backstory, and the specific details are escaping me but iirc he was likely a slave or something along those lines, with implications that hes been abused by adults, so you could delicately handle what kind of abuse he Couldve unfortunately had to go through, and also of course roy and louis are clearly not okay in the head either, but. Once again. Children in rezero Not Being Sexualized in some way is a rarity. Unfortunately.
you see this pop up again and again and again. petra? Yeah iirc theres a side story where shes weird about subarus underwear. Correct me if im wrong on that but also i would not be surprised if that was a real side story. Unfortunately. Also theres Uncomfortable lines regarding petras chest.
according to rezero wiki, schult is… well iirc al makes creepy comments about schult being a shota (and of course this isnt really called out in canon), and theres also these two details about schult:
also regarding sin archbishops who look very young, capella represents lust and yet she also looks like a child. i know the point of her design is to make her a bit grotesque, but you can get that point across without making her look fifteen years old at most. this is the sin of lust too. and shes already called “Mama” in canon—she doesnt need to look that young!!**
also side note about pandora. she also looks like a child, which—its okay with her, except for the frankly lazy outfit design imo?? why is she wearing a bedsheet??**
** another edit: its easy to see capella and pandora as women also, but again, tappei and otsuka In General keep mixing up short/young women and Children and it should be easy to tell if pandora and capella are children or young women or not. but i dont feel that its clear enough given tappei and otsuka’s Track Record.
and typhons design with the see through skirt is so creepy and disturbing that im Really glad the anime fixes it most of the time. heres the fixed version:
but also the anime Really doesnt fix it as much as it probably should, because her dress is Still see-through in some shots. you can even see a bit in this shot—we dont need to see her lower body area like That!! this skirt doesnt need to be see-through!! and the bar was already in hell anyway because otsuka makes typhon’s skirt Really see-through.
theres also this photo of typhons design and its Way better without that see-through skirt.
granted, there is some good child character designs—felt’s arc 1 design frankly sucks though purely because of the way her outfit is handled. like its Really bad. it takes only like one look to see that. but her arc 5 design is a Huge Improvement:
characters like meili, schult, child subaru, etc have good designs too, but you know, this doesnt change the Creepiness regarding children, because this also applies to subaru and Some Lines about him in arc 8 iirc. if i find them again ill talk about it another time (or if someone else finds it feel free to add on to this post?) but yeah just. urgh.
regarding felt again, theres a scene in a felt camp side story where she wakes up naked in bed, post arc 1, after reinhard kidnaps her to his mansion. and yeah, the whole point of the scene is to show reinhard is kind of dense and bad at reading social cues because hes still trying to talk to her very civilly while shes covering herself with the bedsheets and she Literally just got kidnapped by him, but, say it with me, she doesnt need to be naked. she couldve woken up in bed in her usual clothes and the point still wouldve come across!! WHY is she naked??? shes fourteen.
and also like capella, liliana looks like a child. and of course theres kiritaka, as anon said, whos obsessed with liliana, and then theres clind, the creepy butler. and of course tappei has “deniability” because lilianas not Really a child (she STILL looks like one), and clinds not Really a pedophile, he just likes youthful souls!! (this is literally disgusting.) and clind may have interesting lore or whatever about how hes kind of involved with the sin archbishop of melancholy but i just dont give a shit about him when hes a pedophile that tappei keeps excusing.
also mimi? mimi is a Special Case.
the thing with mimi and her brothers is that its implied in the kararagi girl and cats eye side stories that kittypersons (??) are fully grown by age 1. theyre rescued from dying on the streets but they insist theyre “fully grown” (at age 2-3). they havent changed physically at all. and they dont change physically at all later, because now in the Present Day they all look Exactly the same as they did when they were 1, 2, 3 years old. did they grow mentally???? theyre like 14-15 in the main route. and then you look at aganau route from the lost in memories mobile game which takes place around twenty (??) years after arc 3, and mimi is a grown woman and she looks exactly the same as she did when she was 14 or 2 years old. and then this makes her romance with garfiel a little weird because hes a normal fourteen year old??? but mimis been fully grown all this time??? what??
this is mimi. yeah, she and her brothers look EXACTLY this age their WHOLE LIVES.
and meili? yeah shes definitely one of the better child characters, though she does have an Extremely Traumatic backstory and has had a habit of copying elsa. this on its own is fine and understandable. elsa was her only support and shes a child, of course shes gonna copy elsa. though iirc she also copies elsa’s “flirtatious” aspects, which is honestly also understandable given elsa is a Questionable Influence, but this detail about meili’s character gets worse when you think about it in the context of all the other child characters—
why is it that all the children tappei (and otsuka) keep sexualizing are in the same age range? theyre about 9 or 10 to 14. louis stops being sexualized when she reverts to being a toddler and becomes subarus daughter. felt stops being sexualized when she turns 15 in arc 5. emilia is the main love interest to subaru and shes apparently “mentally 14”?? and shes tappeis favorite character too? but also mimis case is so weird because shes been “fully grown” since the tender age of ONE YEARS OLD?? well also i sure hope im wrong on this point but given the amount of child characters that fall in this age range and also how Often theyre all sexualized and also the majority of them are Young Girls—yeah its. its not a great look.
(and again a side note about meili again—tappei uses similar descriptors that he used for louis: that its “inappropriate for her age” and that she’ll “attract many men in the future”. tappei stfu. please.)
subaru’s lolimancer title is kind of funny. maybe. until you remember rezero being creepy about kids. and also like—i dont like the idea of tying a word like “loli” to the literal main character of the story anyway skdnd. theres just Connotations to it.**
**EDIT: i was told that “loli” is apparently a fan translation thing, while in japanese its “little girl user”, but in an inoffensive way (like Jojo’s “stand user”). make of that what you will!! (not great that the fan translation makes rezeros already poor treatment of kids Even Worse.)
and also—was subaru, al, medium, etc turning into children really necessary?
like in subarus case, its so he can have more ego, more confidence, more recklessness while being nerfed a bit and being mistaken as the emperor’s son—but at the same time, this just feels like a watered down version of the amnesiabaru arc to me where he has more ego, more confidence, more recklessness, and hes nerfed, but then he learns to love himself more. it just feels too similar to the amnesiabaru arc imo. him turning into a child feels very unnecessary imo and it doesnt look great when you remember tappei and otsuka’s fixation on children. literally arc 8 would be exactly or almost exactly the same if subaru was back to his usual 18/19-year old self. but he has to keep being a kid right now because Plot, apparently. then again if anyone disagrees with me on this feel free to explain your stance!! but yeah as of rn i just want subaru to be back to his usual age.
also tappeis weird about young priscilla/prisca and lamia but i havent read the ex novels about them yet so i cannot go in depth 👍 but just know you get nice lovely lines (sarcasm) like “flirty way she caresses her own thighs”. great!!! thanks tappei for fanservicing underage teenage girls once again!!
and again, treatment of child characters / characters who look younger than they are in rezero—this is so so creepy also as someone who does in fact look younger than my age. and im also Very Short (4’11) too. so like. thanks tappei and otsuka!! i feel very comfortable right now 👍
and women are often infantilized in rezero which you can. Easily connect to the pedophilia, yeah. theres also age gap romances in general, and i mentioned emilia already (yeah. emisuba is an age gap romance.), but theres also ram and roswaal, frederica and clind, anastasia iirc gets described Weirdly sometimes because shes a short flat-chested woman, and recently theres been madeline and balleroy having a small moment (that feels. Romance coded. iirc.) in an arc 8 chapter.
they look like this by the way:
thanks tappei and otsuka once again for the creepy writing and designs that actively work against all the good parts of the damn story 👍
on a lighter note, i think beatrice in general + beatrice and subarus relationship is one of the better parts of rezero—iirc theres nothing creepy about it, and beatrice and subaru are very easy to read as a sister and brother relationship. theyve helped each other out in many ways, and theyve grown Very close by the time we see them in arc 5!! you could. Technically see their relationship as a father-daughter one too, but i dislike that take—not for bad reasons, but just because i feel like it doesnt fit them.
the thing with beatrice though is that shes simultaneously A Child but shes also like. 400 years old. so i do wish the narrative balanced that more post-arc 4–not in a creepy way of course. god no. but in the sense that shes mature in a lot of ways!! shes familiar with death and suffering!! shes intimately known Isolation!! that sort of thing. shes the one whos closest to subaru because of how he helped her in arc 4 (“choose me”), and also because she knows about his self-harm and heals his injuries. shes someone who can deeply understand subaru in a lot of ways in this sense, at least. the way they support each other feels more like a sibling bond to me and not a Parent-Child one just because youre not Really supposed to be leaning this much on your child for support. theres a power dynamic to a Parent-Child relationship, and beatrice and subaru are Equals.
plus echidna gaslight gatekeep girlbossed both of them, so theyre also siblings in that sense hah…
but yeah correct me if im wrong on that though regarding beatrice and subaru and im missing something?? but yeah as far as i remember and as far as i can tell, i think theyre actually one of the least creepy parts of rezero hah :,)
and then because this sort of thing is Unfortunately so common in media like rezero, we’re kind of conditioned to try and ignore it so we can keep reading or watching because its Everywhere. i still enjoy some of rezero, but its hard to ignore All Of This. and i think its important not to turn your brain off to it and recognize whats Wrong here, yeah. (unless it makes you so uncomfortable that you have to stop looking at rezero, which is very understandable.)
but yep. thats rezero for you.
#rezero#re:zero#ask#tw pedophila mention#tldr rezeros treatment of kids is Horrible and i hate it 😔#like so many of these characters would be so good without the problematic aspects!!#you can write sensitive topics like this but you cannot be Supporting them as you do that!!
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hi im a worldbuilding gremlin and really wanted to ask about the nest room in the raau! is the need for a nest room a more cultural thing or a more instincts/comfort thing? or is it just a style of bedroom that avians have that’s a preference?
also is there any significance to sharing a nest? ive seen some bird-people based societys have it where nest sharing is only done between partners or family, and some where it’s really just up to the birdguy in question
its fine if you dont have an answer to any of these questions lmao i just needed to get them out of my brain
It's for the egg I mean, what.
Nestroom is typically a preference for comfort! It's just more comfortable for birds to sleep in with their wings and how they naturally sleep, and makes them feel safe. Since making sure Jimmy sleeps well is a priority, it's not any less comfortable for Tango, and they wanted to renovate anyways (so Jimmy could do more things comfortably in/near the house) they decided it would be the best option.
Traditionally Avians live in roosts with a single nestroom. It's pretty typical for the whole immediate family to pile into a single nest. Non-family even being in the nestroom is a big no-no, though, it's supposed to be a safe place to hide away in with only the closest people to the avian.
It's pretty typical for avians to convert bedrooms into makeshift nests when they need comfort, it's probably something Jimmy's done several times by now. It's like a kid building a fort when they're scared.
It isn't any more scandalous than the rancher's current sleeping situation if that's what you're wondering. Another avian is gonna read it as 'Tango's the person he feels safest with'. If Grian comes over he will also probably be allowed to sleep in the nest, and likely Lizzie as well.
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Behind the scenes
the lovely @dira333 tagged me in this and its sooo fun!! the questions are so amazing and id like to give it my best with some in depth answers, since learning these facts about one of my favorite writers here was so fun !!!!! behind the scenes of writing is so good to share!!
Started writing: i think ive always been writing. i remember when we used to have one computer for the entire family in the early 00's and had little screentime, i set alarms to 4-5am (with no concept of what that Would Do To Me emotionally without sleep LMAO) JUST to get some time to write in peace. my first fanfictions i published was on a homemade forum page with a friend when i was 11!
Started blogging: ive had my tumblr since 2009-ish where ive been a rp'er over multiple times and published d gray man and no. 6 fanfictions in 2011-12ish. i was also active on livejournal before i found fanfiction.net !! but this specific blog was made in may 2021!!! the reader inserts came then :3
Followers: i actually JUST hit 300 two days ago!!! which is very exciting. i dont always look at the number, since it doesnt necessarily correlate with engangement, but its fun to see the uptick!!
Communication: i genuinely love love LOVE the social part of social media, and communications so important to me. theres nothing better than reblogs with comments you can bounce off of, asks, dm's and all that! sadly, my disability makes it so hard for me to have continuous contact and im 90% of the time the one to drop the ball when it comes to replying :(( thats why its extra important to me/special with the mutuals who keeps reaching out and dont have the same social expectations about replying. even if im unable to reply the day that i receive the message, it still brings great joy seeing the notif!
Likes: i dont mind them! generally its not that important to me whether or not my followers interact a lot. a like still means the world to me. of course a reblog is much better and engages so much more (+ boosts me!!), but theyre good for my soul, too!
Requests: i get very few requests :( i think i like them, but i havent gotten enough to actually get a feel on whether or not it kills my writing spirit? generally i get very excited to be able to deliver something and it gets me up from the bed to write, but i sometimes fear im not providing what they wanted! its anxiety-inducing in some ways, but i love a good little writing challenge !!
Writing: i loove love love love writing for hours at a time, hyperfixating on it. sadly, my cat snøfle is Very Jealous of both my laptop and pc. giving him a substitution sadly doesnt help</3 so my writing is often limited to specific times of day, and when he gets tired of my keyboard clack-clack-clacking, its time to put on some one piece while he naps on me! i wish i could write more works or just scenes on my phone, but it hurts my hands So Much, so i only write small one shots when im heavily inspired but snøfles in A Mood!!
genre wise im a fluffy type. maybe some hurt/comfort but always leaning towards comfort. id like to write more disability fics to spread both awareness and visibility, but i sometimes struggle with putting in my own disabilities and not make them too personal or too detailed for others to not relate. its an overthinking problem, so i often procrastinate writing them., bcos i fear itll be too niche! but i always get positive feedback (excpet for that one time with inked coffee lmao) so im not sure whats holding me back!!!
i always listen to music when i write, and it differs a lot. when i wrote the star and the earth i listened to a lot of medieval-inspired music, and made a specific playlist for that. but when i write on my modern au's or canon compliant bnha/haikyuu, anything goes!
i love putting in 'boring' every day stuff into my fics, or small scenes that dont necessarily advance the plot but just gives a feel of the characters.
speaking of snøfle ^ i am no longer allowed to write for the evening.... so ill start some apothecary diaries and enjoy a cold soda on this hot and humid evening !!! mwuah mwuah if u read this far thank you, and i love you. i love all of you <3333
no pressure tags as always but would love to hear the answers and get to know u all! @cup-of-fluff @true-deru @mirandabarma @illuminiscentboba @tetsuskei @threadbaresweater @krystalgaia @petriquors @ktsumu @moonbeamwritings @ohtokki
#tag games#waaah genuinely this made me so excited. i love talking about writing. can never shut up#wanna hear yalls thoughts and answers too but always remember theres no pressure if these are too personal 1!! its okay to skip any if you#want!!! <3333 smooching u¨
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Hello!
I don't want to ask about the next chapter date, but I really liked when you'd talk about future chapters here, even when it was just mentioning the percentage of writing done or any small detail. So, if you don't mind and enjoy answering questions about it, what was you favorite scene to write and the most difficult one? Anything funny/interesting about it or the writing process? Have you decided where you want the next chapter to end? Was there a scene you weren't really looking forward to writing, but it needed to happen for the sake of the plot? I hope this isn't too spoiler-y, it can be as vague as you like! Hope you have a great day ✨️
hi anon! ha thats great cause i dont know it!
totally happy to talk about the chapter! lmao i got no idea about percentage done only that (as always) the chap is likely to end up longer than i expected ahhahahaahahah.
ive been writing a lot of smut scenes so most of the overall vibe of the chap has been pretty horny lol. its always a different experience writing sex scenes because youre trying to fit a lot of working parts together like what are the main emotions being conveyed? is it sexy and sensual? is it raw and messy and violently passionate? and then there's all the practical considerations like where are their hands at? who took pants off first? did you remember to remove the socks? are they actually in the kind of position that would be physically impossible in real life? lmao. i find the most important part is making a sex scene believable because youre not going to get a reaction from an audience who doesnt believe in it. and if its not believable then even that has its own function and is fulfilling some kind of narrative purpose in the moment to underlay an unaddressed tension. it feels like there are a lot of layers to the characters in this fic and honestly that comes across into the sex too!!
so in this chap they're in a very interesting new dynamic now where pete has been the one sort of chasing Vegas (and it kind of blew up in his face a little) like sure he's admitted to being angry but he hasn't quite admitted to what that did to his trust in vegas. pete offering himself to vegas was a BIG deal and vegas running off anyway was a deep cut to pete (even if vegas also gave him the ring). and that hasn't been sufficiently addressed as yet- so pete is already falling back into old habits of being a little more guarded with himself again. and vegas is such an emotional mess at the moment he's trying to deepen their intimacy as much as he can. he wants to feel close to pete but hes at least self aware enough about his chances for that which is why hes so intent in doing it through physical means (sex and bodily intimacy). i think vegas is very sensitive to any changes to petes behaviour around him so its not going to take very long for him to pick up theres something affecting the previous easy comfort they were finding in each others company before the coup. which is also why hes coming on a lot stronger in the sense of being possessive of pete and his time around people who arent a threat to him (i.e his brother and pete's family) and then being openly hostile to people who have some kind of claim to pete (like his childhood friend poom who isnt romantically interested in pete). basically vegas is feeling insecure of their relationship just as pete is feeling a little insecure about his ability to trust vegas- they're just showing the effects of this in different ways!! (well pete isnt quite showing it as yet but he will)
hmm favourite scene atm is their messy bathroom hook up tbh it is really off the wall for them. i wouldnt say theres an especially difficult scene- i dont normally view writing like that but i have been reworking a lot of that bathroom scene because its actually going to include both POVs and ive been trying to figure out the best place for that POV shift to transition (but i think i've finally decided on a point that im satisfied with). for scenes im interested in most i tend to write those first and then build on them long enough that they end up linking together with other scenes into a comprehensive storyline so there's not really scenes i'm not looking forward to writing if that makes sense? theres obvs like the research details which i end up having to search for but i usually put in placeholders so it doesnt affect the flow of the writing whilst im doing it. i guess for your question then that it would just be the scenes that i get to last? but that doesnt necessarily mean i dont like them or arent interested in them or don't want to write them. it's weirdly a lot less conscious decision making in regards to that. im mostly just filling in scenes that i havent written yet at the moment. i usually like the ideas i come up with for the sake of the plot so there's really not that much reluctance in those plot decisions tbh!! like i came up with a connection/ backstory to the minor family/ main family rings which tankhun is planning to use to his advantage (and get petes help to do so) and it ended up tying in really well with the characterisations of Mr Korn and Mr Kan so that it slotted very neatly (imo) into the fic! i dont mind being too spoilery if people don't mind being spoiled!! but i know ppl have different standards for that so it's better (and sometimes more fun!) to be a bit vague.
thanks for the questions!! it was great to think about. hope you have a great day too! :)
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okay I need to know everything about the backstory for Tren’s Xenoanatomy
AHHHHH i would love to talk about one of my trek fics!! especially my very first foray into mckirk :D
im gonna put this under a readmore bc i feel like giving myself permission to ramble today lmao
so tren's xenoanatomy specifically came about because we were watching one of those doctors-react videos about gray's anatomy and it occurred to me how much more hilariously off the wall medical shows would be in universes like star trek where there are nonhuman species around as well, and jim and bones just felt like the perfect couple to play with that idea with.
tren's xenoanatomy is also technically a companion piece for a larger spock x oc fic that will admittedly almost certainly never be finished or posted, but where basically after all of the bullfuckery the enterprise crew had been put through, they're made a part of the pilot program where starfleet starts assigning therapists to starships--particularly those on more extended missions. i do very much love nel, tho. i think he's one of my oldest ocs and he amuses me greatly because when high school merlyn first created him, he was norah. but then you grow up and you look at spock and you realize how incredibly homosexual he is. and so you simply trans your oc. and now his name is nel and he's still a therapist but he's also a hotter-than-thou top with a dildo collection worthy of a museum.
excuse the old art, we stay improving lmao.
anyway, back to the actual subject characters of the fic you asked for 😂😂 mckirk sort of continues to happen in the background of the main fic, and they've been in this same refusing-to-put-a-label-on-it holding pattern pretty much since the academy and the events of tren's xenoanatomy. are they friends? lovers? boyfriends? married? divorced? who's to say. neither of them. they of course get their shit together eventually, though. and also end up in an even stranger poly situation with a romulan woman named verelan that defects to starfleet after Events™️. it starts off very jim, jim's boyfriend, and jim's boyfriend's girlfriend, but jim grows on her eventually. like mold.
here's a nice little morning snippet of the three of them, as a treat since i went off on a wild tangent here and im not even sure if ive managed to answer the question 😂😂 don't let her softness with leonard here fool you, this is immediately followed by her declaring that the solution to his custody issues with his ex-wife is that she enter ritual combat with said ex-wife on his behalf.
“Dammit, Jim, what have I told you about fryin’ bacon without a damn shirt on?” “That you’re not fixing it if I burn a nipple off,” Jim prattles off. He tilts his head to the side in a clear demand for a kiss on the cheek. Leonard rolls his eyes but indulges him anyway. “Which we both know is bullshit, by the way. You love me too much to let me walk around with just one nipple.” “Try me, kid,” he grumbles, shuffling over to the stools lining the opposite side of the kitchen counter and settling into one. Jim sets a mug of coffee in front of him a moment later and Leonard tilts his chin up for a real kiss before Jim pads back over to the stove. “Thanks, Jim.” Jim just kind of grunts in answer, and Leonard snorts a little. Both of them glance up at the sound of feet on the stairs, and Leonard smiles softly when Verelan comes into sight. “Mornin’, darlin’.” He gets a small, fond smile in return, and she ducks down to kiss the top of his head once she’s close enough, resting a hand on his back as she does so. “Good morning, Leonard.” “Hey, where’s my kiss good morning?” complains Jim from the stove, letting his voice go all high and reedy in the way he knows annoys her the most. Leonard feels Verelan straighten behind him, and a glance up confirms that her eyes have narrowed at the blond. He doesn’t feel the need to intervene quite yet; this sort of interplay is fairly standard. Jim can’t breathe unless he’s winding someone up, and unfortunately for the Romulan, she tends to make it easy for him. “You do not get one, James,” Verelan drawls. “I do not like you.” “No, no,” says Jim, grinning now, unabashedly. “Pancake tax.” They stare at each other, Jim continuing to grin while Verelan visibly sizes him up, trying to determine how serious he is. Leonard snorts again and is ignored wholesale. He sort of can’t believe she’s considering it this far; she must really want those damn pancakes. She hasn’t figured out yet that Jim would go hungry himself long before he denied food to anyone else. Verelan finally folds first around the time that the standoff starts to remind Leonard of a pair of feral barn cats, her eyes narrowing a millimeter further before she gives a frustrated growl and all but stomps over to bestow a begrudging kiss to Jim’s cheek. Shit that he is, Jim just beams and leans into it.
#asks#moot posting#tren's xenoanatomy#mckirk#spock x oc#jim x bones x oc#this is probably one of the least coherent ask responses ive given in a minute but we're just gonna go with it
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answer every question on the proship ask meme POP QUIZ [or is it pro quiz??] i wanna knoooooow
@teacupballerina @hopscorched @emile-hides
sorry it took so long to get to these! gonna post em all together and give two answers where it makes sense since some of these are repeats!
1.) What is your favorite problematic theme/trope that appears in a lot of your ships?
its literally so basic in the grand scheme of problematic stuff, but i love a teen girl x older man, especially when she's in charge lol. i also like things like 'damning secret' (basically people going through forced proximity because they both know something they'd get in a lot of trouble over if it got out) or just forced proximity in general also a fan of one of the characters going insane with covetous love and lust that drives them to do all kinds of fucked up shit about it and also! a handy chart of one of my All Time Dynamics, kid x creature (im counting pompep)
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2.) Are there any problematic tropes that squick you out?
i dont really like anything involving cheating, DV, or hardcore rape/assault, feels bad man
3.) First problematic ship since you joined the proship community?
tbh ive never really Not been proship, it was the only logical thing to me, so this answer is kinda tricky- i guess i could say when i Actively started interacting with other proshippers? but tbqh i dont really remember sorry jklfsdk
4.) First ever problematic ship? (you didn't have to know it was problematic then)
quiche and ichigo from tmm is literally whats wrong with me it fucked up the chemistry of my brain when i was like 12
5.) Ship you don't think it all that problematic, but the rest of your fandom hates?
idk if this really counts Exactly but im baffled to this day by the divide the ML fandom has over the different love square dynamics, please explain to me how every combo is good and wholesome, except for marinette x chat noir, which is somehow bad and degenerate, like even the people working on it make jokes about it like what do you mean its the same gd people???
some others come from spop, where people will try to convince me that hordak x entrapta is abusive despite being one of the healthiest dynamics in the show, or how bow x glimmer is Practically incest cause they. grew up together??? spop discourse was Nuts
6.) Cutest, most vanilla ship you are into.
hmm probably my crossover ship for berry and adrien, they're downright saccharine
7.) Ship the antis in your fandom like, but you think is hella problematic?
Absolutely no hate to the people who like these but oh my god yall there are others but these are always the first two that come to mind
8.) Ship that is (presented as) cute in canon/fanon, but you think is problematic anyway.
kinda just the same ones i just listed tbh
9.) Problematic crackship?
as someone who deals almost Exclusively in rare pairs and crack ships, most of them lmao but if we're going with like. Probably Worst all across the board, its whatever is going on with cedrιc, elyοn, and phοbοs from w..i..t..c..h the depravity that we never got to fully explore with these three is off the charts
10.) Are there any problematic ships that are your NOTPs?
i do not care for wιllιam x mιchael aftοn- p sure its popular in fnαf proship spaces but im just never could come around to it other than that i cant really think of any- usually i only notp things because the fans piss me off about it, and i dont generally have that problem with other proshippers
11.) Darkest fandom you are into?
im really into old rpg horror games in general, and Those get Super Dark, so probably that!
12.) Least dark fandom that you are into!
sοfia the first, but rest assured im Making it problematic
13.) Rec a dead dove fic!
im so sorry but put on the spot, every single fic ive ever read and held dear has suddenly totally absconded from my brain and i cant recall literally any of them
14.) Song that reminds you of one of your pairings!
here just have some playlists i put together for some of them so i dont have to choose anything specific: Grim x Mandy Gaz x Zim Mabel x Bill Snufkιn x Jοxter and my general problematic playlist you'll like em
15.) Silliest reason you've been told not to ship a ship.
'its not canon' is the dumbest shit i've Ever heard and yet somehow is super pervasive in fandom
#and thats everything! hope the answers are interesting#half the reason this took so long was fighting with formatting and actually loading pictures in i hate the new tumblr editorrrr
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Sorry if you have already said so. But what exactly is the elemental power or elemental essence?? Of dark
How powerful is it?
How powerful is Ryan compared to the other Ninja?
How powerful is the Elemental Power of dark in general
How powerful is Ryan compared to Lloyd Garmadon and Wu?
i am so joyous that someone is asking about ryan garmadon tysm
to answer your questions i wanna state that ryan is supposed to be the polar opposite of lloyd, in terms of powers and abilities. Lloyd is light, Ryan is darkness. They're both equal in terms of powers, so Ryan is stronger than the other ninja, but not Lloyd.
Unlike Lloyd though, Ryan embraces his oni form, so he's much more willing to use it to get out of situations where just his powers arent enough.
How ive imagined his powers working is they're much stronger in dark places/at night (while lloyd is the opposite). He can control a void-like substance that can basically make him extend his limbs or even make new ones (like give himself four arms without having to become an oni). The closest thing to showing off ghosts powers is in a joke video where he just straight up grab's jay
but i think it would be better if i made some (very lazy) sketches explaining his powers
this might make ryan seem pretty unbalanced between him and the other ninja, and even lloyd, but in my au with ryan in it i like to imagine lloyd can still control the other 4 main elements (yes i know the only reason he could before was cause he was the ultimate spinjitzu master/the golden master but im unfortunately a nostalgic fan so i like holding onto stuff from older seasons <//3), they're just much weaker than his own element. for example he can control fire pretty decently but never nearly as good as kai. so it basically balances out if lloyd and ryan ever got into an actual fight: ryan's got his funky void powers and lloyd's got (albeit weaker) 4 other elements at his disposal.
ryan could also merge into the darkness and appear in a different place, but the same goes for lloyd with light (shine a light in two different areas of a room and lloyd will just disappear from one spot to another)
if it wasnt obvious im trying to make ryan and lloyd actually look like the descendants of what is essentially god lmao
ryan in terms of power is more powerful than wu, but wu could still beat him in a fight just cause he's got more experience than it, same with garmadon. the real deciding factor is "will ryan use his oni powers?"
in my au lloyd does decide to use his oni form more, but they much prefer not to. Not opposed, but would use it as a last resort, if anything.
in general? the element of darkness is as strong as the element of energy, ryan and lloyd are as yin and yang as it gets lol
ryan's pretty much inherited all of his powers from garmadon, so anything garmadon can do ryan can do as well, and this goes with the oni thing. ryan uses his oni powers often not to make things easier, but to make sure he has complete control and isnt gonna go on an evil rampage, despite knowing that simply being an oni doesn't automatically make you evil (garmadon trauma 🔥🔥🔥)
while ryan's powers are really strong, he could definitely still be beaten by one of the ninja since they all basically have matching skills, but they are basically really lucky ryan's on their side and not on the evil side.
if something i explained looks weird then feel free to send another ask about it, i probably just didnt explain it right or it can be explained with just "its part of my au lawl", ty again for asking about ryan!
oh yeah also ryan can still summon a dragon because i think its fucking stupid that the ninja get that power taken away from them cause its "too op." THAT IS SO DUMB!!!! LET THOSE DUMB NINJA SUMMON SILLY LITTLE DRAGONS!!!!!!
#I LOVE ANSWERING QUESTIONS ABOUT MY OCS!!!!!#RAAAHHH!!!!!#most of my ideas ive had since i was suuuupper young#so even if it looks strange i just refuse to let go of them <//3#i got too attached <//3#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago fandom#dragons rising#ninjago dragons rising#ninjago oc#ryan garmadon#rambles#lynx oc#lynx posting
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when i post things about narc abuse on my blog i occasionally get ppl being like "don't classify all ppl with npd as abusers!!!" when i didn't say that? tbh on the whole "is narc abuse ableist" thing i defer to my best friend's wisdom, he recently graduated with a BA in psychology (im so proud!!!) and he said smth to the effect of "if you're trying to diagnose them with npd to demonize them then yeah not good but also narcissistic is a word independent of that diagnosis so context is important" its like how ppl without depression can still say theyre depressed or someone without anxiety can say theyre anxious yknow? context matters! i call my parents narc abusers bc it "fits the bill" as in from the medical studies ive read from professionals, all this criteria fits their behavior, not bc i actually believe they have npd. their actions are narcissistic but actually having npd is a question i can't answer.
the point being: im sure you get a lot more comments like that on your blog than my own. the few i get make me upset for a while bc it feels so invalidating (or maybe im just chronically online lmao.) how do you deal with it all? i'm sure the answer is just "block" but does it go deeper? it must feel awful to be called ableist when all you've done is try to spread awareness about a very real thing that happened to you. i could use some of your strength bc your blog is still going strong even amidst the hate 🙏
This ask was actually so lovely to read. You're eloquent and educated and if you'd like to dm me please do any time I'd love to chat with you and check out your blog.
You're absolutely right about narcissism and NPD. Narcissism is a personality trait. One that most healthy people posses. You can't diagnose someone a narcissist, because "narcissist" isn't a disorder.
There's a misconception that NPD is the clinical diagnosis for excessive narcissism. Actually, the diagnostic criteria for NPD is very clear that one does not even have to have narcissistic traits to be diagnosed with it. And it has nothing to say about abusing others, so how recognising abuse is considered a drive by diagnosis of NPD is beyond me.
Saying your abuser is narcissistic doesn't mean you think your abuser has this specific disorder. We know this so to us it's common sense. Unfortunately common sense isn't so common, especially in the narcissistic positivity side of this app.
It's so easy to feel provoked when you know all this, and you're educated and you just want to make content that will connect you to a community of other survivors. Only for some asshole who barely knows what NPD is, decides they're going to make your trauma all about it. It's not chronically online to be made upset by behaviour like that. People like to tell us the Internet isn't real, but when it's our connection to communities of people who share our niche experiences, it is real. Don't undermine yourself when you feel upset like that. Words can hurt anyone, even when they come from an ignorant low life who thinks they can clean up the internet, one trauma support blog at a time.
Me personally? I like to wait to hit the block button till after I've goaded them into an absolute breakdown. It entertains me to no end to watch them rage like toddlers as they start to realise they know next to nothing on a topic I've absolutely schooled them in. It sounds cruel but I have no sympathy for arseholes, especially when they're intentionally spamming random accusations and slurs on my vent posts in hopes they can get a rise out of a vulnerable person. I might make a "narcissists rage at facts and logic" compilation for my own amusement... But that's not really helpful advice to anyone who isn't a bitter hag, like me.
When I first started on this platform I kept my most common response paragraphs in my notes and clipboard to paste and post when I got the same asks day in and day out. It really helped me to reply in a measured way I knew was proof read and edited without having to exert the mental energy it takes to type out a whole reply every time you get one. This of course is if you're so inclined to engage with them.
I also have a limit for how long I'll engage. Usually my rule is I stop responding when they stop asking questions, because my blog is here to be supportive, not to receive criticism from the pro narcissist community. When they stop being coherent and and start being belligerent, that's when will always I block them and that's usually the end of it.
I did have one guy who I'd blocked on 3 or 4 seperate accounts for being belligerent. He was making new accounts every time to spam my asks and reblogs with increasingly ridiculous, heinous and obviously ragebaity shit. I just reposted his replies onto reddit where the crowd is, let's say, more critical of behavior like that. He had an epic meltdown and I've never seen his username ever again. If you're not comfortable doing that, let me know and I'll do it for you. You'd be doing me a favour because I'm a little shit and I love to watch the fireworks.
My last bit of advice to you is to make mutuals and make them friends. I struggle with being sociable in any consistent way, but a few messages back and forth to foster a good relationship with the community is so helpful. It makes your blog feel like an actual supportive environment. It puts your content across the dashboards of more sympathetic people and less losers thanks to the algorithm. Most importantly, when you have friends on this app they're more likely to back you up when an absolute cretin who snuck onto earth decides to pick on you for no reason. Having that back up is invaluable to blogs like ours and it's so important to have it when you're just starting out, especially if you're already getting the narc apologists in your notifs.
That being said, I genuinely do hope you reach out to me. I'd love to be able to send you some more of my strength when you need it. 💛🤎💛
#narcissistic abuse#narcissistic people#narcissist#surviving narcissism#raised by narcissists#narcissistic abuse support#narcissistic abuse awareness#narcissistic abuse recovery#narcissistic abuse survivor#trauma support#mental health recovery#mental health support#ptsd support#narcissism is not a disability#narcissism is not npd
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Phullo it is I again!
I am very glad that you actually responded and given me an actual advice since I was worried about the question I sent you.
Though besides that I have another question for you (hoorayyy)!
So, about the reading books earlier- I’m fortunately a bookworm too! It’s just that I notice I prefer reading the genre science fiction/psychological horror more than… anything else!
And while the books I am currently reading, ‘Flowers For Algernon’ and ‘I’m Thinking Of Ending Things’ (these books are seriously so wonderfully made they make want to tear my walls), DO have romantic aspects of it- it’s not really the main plot of the story..
‘Flowers For Algernon’ has amazing storytelling and is very unique- though I’m not sure if you’ve read it before but, it’s actually just the main character taking notes. Hence why there was a lot misspellings which honestly makes it a great touch if you know the context behind it.
On the other hand, ‘I’m Thinking Of Ending Things’ too shares the same uniqueness as the other, possibly even more unique if I must say so myself. Though I REALLY don’t want to make my story similar to them since I want to make it more heart warming than fucked up..
Which is why I feel like I have the need to borrow or buy at least one romantic book because, I lack of it. I mean I accidentally borrowed it one time but it was kind of disappointing.
I don’t know if its a good idea and if I should do it or not since does it really matter of the genre, or just the writing?
Still, if you have any good books that are in the romance genre. Feel free to recommend some to me!
-lots of love, from another bookworm
welcome back! happy to hear you're a bookworm as well <3 im writing those titles down since i read a criminal lack of sci-fi despite loving it
i actually don't have any straight up romance recs - i don't actively search it out (outside of fanfic), so any romance i read just comes with whatever book i've picked up. just straight up romance bores me, unless its a fic with a pairing i actively like. and even then, i need to take breaks from it unless the romance is interspersed with an actual plot. im not a romantically-geared person! i dont have single Main Plot Is Romance book on my shelves!
but imo its really just the quality of writing that helps. ive never been in a romance, im the child of two different divorces, and yet ive been told that i write romance fairly well. go fuckin figure lmao.
so actually my advice on romance is to just like. wow idk what i do is pick apart the romances i see on tv / in writing. what makes them good together, how do they act around each other, what are their love languages, what's their dynamic, what traditional romance things do they partake in, what dont they partake in, do they have anything nontraditional, do they work and why do / they dont they - does that make their relationship more interesting or is it flat. are they a good match.
you don't have to have every answer, but ive found that at least understanding their characters / dynamics, and having them interact in a way that suits them will help your romance feel natural. dont conform to tropes or tradition, that will just make the relationship flat and unrealistic. and you can always sprinkle in little things that you like / would like, which will help ground the romance and get you into the groove
tldr with romance, i think it's better to observe real life (whether that's paying attention to couples or reading reddit threads) & analyze in-love or in-a-relationship characters instead of just reading romance novels. bc honestly, and from what i can tell, they can tend to be over the top or cookie cutter
just realized you did not explicitly ask for romance advice! Oopsie! i got a little carried away here....
#another thing i like to do is analyze bad fictional relationships / ones i dont like#both bc it gives me a concise argument / explanation if someone gets on me about it#and bc it helps me understand what makes good romances Good#bc bad relationships make me sit there and ask 'well. what went wrong here? why dont they work? why do i hate this? whats Missing?'#and filling in those gaps teaches me what Does work. what will go Right. why i Love it. what Is there.#sometimes the answer is simply bad writing & after taking a deeper look#i can conclude they they Are good for each other - the show/book just shoved them together with no reason other than#'need romance' or 'boy meet girl' or 'love at first sight'#i mean there are some romances that i look at it and im like 'wow! this should not be happening!'#but i Like it because its interesting enough! a good example is aline & the darkling from the grishaverse#such a fucking unhealthy relationship. really well written. fascinating. hot as hell. important for the story/characters.#i wanted to rip them apart but also glue them together to see how horrible the train crash would be!!!!#absolutely unprompted#so i mean... i think i can rec books that Have good romances in them? but thats not the focus by any means#lemme know... i know im less helpful this time around but i hope im helping a little!#feel free to ask as many questions as you like - ill do my best with all of them
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