#im not aro either just ace but think I might be on the aro spectrum somewhere

[aleakybiro]

Honestly I don't get why people think ur boring without romance. sure I like hearing abit of romantic drama but it's not the most interesting thing. Like wanna see this thing I built or new music I found or wanna hear about my cool new friend or my asshole coworker or the time I fell asleep in a graveyard cause I don't see how any of that's boring

Heartstopper scene rant

Does everyone know that one scene in hearstopper when isaac ran out of the bookshop and the gang was bombarding him with questions like "did you guys kiss?" "who confessed first bla bla bla"

And when he said "I'm sorry you don't think my life is interesting bc I don't have any romantic drama in my life" was so important to me. Because when I tell you how BORING you can feel as an aroace. With a society thats obsessed with romance you tend to feel really lonely. Even with my friends when they keep spilling abt their romance life I can't help but feel bad that Im not bringing anything new to the table. To some point i start making up stories and gossip just to seem exciting.

And to be fair I very much like to indulge in romantic stories and gossip, but not having any of your own really makes others see you as someone with no personality. This really just pushes the idea that romance builds your character, "defines you" in some way. That without romance we can't possibly be "complete" . Which is a hard mindset to break free from. Im struggling with this mindset but it makes me feel comforted knowing that there's people who understand. Just want to say thank you to Alice for writing that line. I feel heard <333

[mushroom-through-the-stargate]

i sent this to stick and she said i should post it so have stargate characters based on how strongly i headcanon them as on the asexual spectrum (atlantis edition)

john : 100% certain hes aro, about 80% certain hes ace. hes some flavour of queer and one simply does not make Those Faces when they're being flirted with if theyre allo

rodney : demi!rodney has a hold on my brain especially demigay like boi needs step-by-step instructions for rom relationships (cough unless its with john cough cough) that's not allo behavior

teyla : im not sure if shes aspec or not. she might just be a little too chill. idk.

ronan : melena was his moon and stars hes definitely not aro (not that aros cant have those relationships but it was definitely romantic)

aiden : not aspec but too emotionally immature for a relationship. girls still have cooties to him.

carson : i dont think hes aspec i think hes just picky. like theres demi and then theres Just Picky and he definitely falls into the latter category. the man fell for perna in 3 days and then mourned her like a soulmate (imo they were but ✨️shock value deaths✨️)

elizabeth : not aspec just loyal (to a douche like i get that she told simon to move on bc she wasnt sure if she was coming back, thats not what i fault him for. he shouldve TOLD HER THE SECOND SHE SHOWED UP instead of letting her act and think that they were still together until the last possible moment)

radek : definitely aro. boi raised pigeons.

chuck : not aspec maybe bisexual??? (more like bi himself 🥲)

lorne : definitely not aspec. whoever he dates he will treat them RIGHT

caldwell : too in love with elizabeth to be aro

ellis : not aspec but who would want him

cadman : too slutty to be aspec (affectionate)

keller : not aspec but her I Can Fix Him gene is too strong. babe hes a man not a renovation project either accept his neurodivergence or dump his ass

grodin : idk could go either way. i don't think hes upset about being single but i dont think hed say no to a date

woolsey : romantically a wet cat of a man. the most upsetting part of his divorce was that his ex took the yorkie and that speaks volumes. not sure what its saying but its Loud

just a disclaimer these are just my opinions but if you disagree with me keep it to yourself lol you wont change my mind 😜

[variousqueerthings]

something ive been thinking about a lot coming into new spaces and meeting new people is how and when to mention being aroace -- there was a time where id try to get that out there as quickly as possible, just to set the boundaries implied by that down right off the bat, not in a first-sentence description kind of way, but just as a casually slipping it into a conversation when it fits/if it fits (usually easier in queer spaces), but in the last few years my boundaries/wants have shifted somewhat (more and less in various ways) within this spectrum, and a lot of people don't know to inquire to get a little deeper into what that might look like

so very nice, very respectful people hear aroace and go "ah yes, the door is shut on x things" which is very nice and respectful of them to do, but then i feel like im missing out on potential spaces and conversations that i do want to be included in, but feel increasingly out of place in mentioning, due to the amount of explaining i'd have to do to clarify where i stand sort-of-apropos-nothing -- which is due to aspec identities being not well understood

some people are quite good at being direct (my old flatmates basically went "would you prefer it if we just had sex when you weren't around" and i was like, "eh, it's fine, you're not having sex in my room after all" and i tended to listen to music on my headphones), but often there's a full stop that comes when people hear aroace, like now i can only be whatever version of that exists in their head, usually, again, very respectfully but crucially without asking me, the most extreme version they can imagine in all directions, that precludes any complexity in my experiences

me specifically, i feel like it can be hard to talk about my attraction to masc-aligned people, and to talk about enjoying kink, about sexual politics, and even tbh, to make jokes about sex, either because people almost get embarrassed or self-conscious as if they were aro and/or ace, or they go "hey wait, i thought you were..." and then you have to go on a bit of a tedious repetition of aspec 101

this isn't a big Thing in the end, i'm just musing on here as an ongoing question for myself about how i'd want to bring these things into a potential space in future (whether that space is queer generally, trans-specific, or none of these)

also how to get involved in kink spaces that aren't heavily geared towards sex. getting there

[aro-culture-is]

I accepted my asexuality pretty quickly. The country i live in sees the topic of sex as taboo and its never talked about. NEVER. Its toxic and bad but meh, its the culture. Maybe the reason i never had a problem with it was becauss im asexual.

But realising i might be aro is not. Im struggling with internalized arophobia. Im having identity crisis and existential crisis. And ive heard being aro/ace can be due to trauma? Is that real? Because if it is, lots of things start to make sense about me. Aplatonic aros? Is that a thing too? Ive always felt unfit. Never wanted a friend but seeing everyone in a group or with someone made me feel unworthy and broken from a young age. I don't want a traditional family and i feel like the one i currently am in would've gotten rid of me a long time ago if they could. My dad never kept it a secret how he disliked us, i know my mom sees me as a failure even tho she reassures me, and my brother's world is totally different from me. The few friends i managed to keep throughout the years either gotten on with their lives or found better people. What's the point of living then? Am i even human? How are other aros doing it? Am i aro or just a really shitty person who lost faith in love a long time ago? I need help

hi,

for one, yes - being a-spec can be due to trauma. There's even a microlabel for being aro (caedromantic) or ace (caedsexual) due to trauma.

aplatonic (apl) aros are absolutely a thing!

I'm so very sorry that you've had such a terrible experience with your family. Coming from an emotionally abusive household, I know how much it can completely change how you interact with others. If it is available and mental health services are okay in your country, I'd really recommend seeing a therapist. Even if you don't discuss aromanticism, asexuality, or aplatonicism, it's worth discussing with a professional about the ways you have been affected by the trauma of a family that never seems to accept you.

speaking again as a traumatized individual - as i've worked on my mental health, accepting my trauma, and moving forwards from my trauma, I personally have only grown more capable of accepting myself as aromantic and aplatonic-spectrum. I've learned that my life is my own; I can define what makes me happy in life and seek that, even if others will never understand.

I don't enjoy romantic relationships or living with others - so for me, my ideal future involves planning around living alone and what makes me happiest within that framework. I've considered that I do still get lonely, and that I'd love to have a cat - probably two, since some research seems to indicate cats generally are better adjusted when there are two.

I've thought about how I use my time - I'm disabled and in literal, full-body physical pain 24/7. Going places is an activity that requires me to plan recovery time, so I work especially hard to make my daily living comfortable. I'm currently working on finding little ways to make my life easier - putting meds, food, and water within easy reach of my bed and desk, for example - and learning to allow myself to enjoy those little things.

There's a certain amount of childish glee I'm learning to allow myself to enjoy from small activities. Those, for me, are a primary set of reasons to live. I enjoy my lotions, I eat breakfast for every meal, I lipsync in my bathroom mirror and giggle at my expressions. I learn to live as myself and I learn to see the small joys in it.

This isn't to suggest you aren't trying hard enough to find those joys! I don't think I truly could have done this without anti-depressants, therapy, and supportive friends (friendship is... complicated for me). You will have your own path forwards. I promise that with time and practice, things get better. It's rarely a sudden moment of change. It's often a sensation of taking a deep breath, saying to yourself "I am allowed to feel this way, and I am allowed to do what helps me feel better", and learning to comfort yourself. It's like seeing an echo of your younger self desperately trying not to cry, and realizing that they still exist within you, and you are now also the adult comforting that child, parenting yourself through things your parents never prepared you for.

I really, really hope things improve for you. You deserve to enjoy life. You deserve to not hurt.

[lordofseagulls]

#oh good we got to 24k#time to ramble in the tags#so lately I've been seeing the resurrection of the good ole 'no romo' discourse#only now it's dressed in progressive terms like 'qpr'#now to be fair i support qpr wholeheartedly#im ace and might be somewhere on the aro spectrum too so i get it. i do#but it doesn't apply to these particular characters#whose creator is very weird about sexuality and especially female sexuality#to this day he keeps claiming that scully's child was the result of the immaculate conception#whenever scully experienced desire she got punished for it by the narrative#this isn't ace representation. this is the case of a catholic man being weirded out by sex#*columbo voice* and one more thing ☝🏻#this isn't the case of 'he was a boy she was a girl' either#the argument 'why can't men and women just be friends' isn't valid here because they Are friends#they're friends they're partners they're also lovers#eventually‚ reluctantly‚ the narrative allows that last thing to happen#no matter how hard chris carter tried to backtrack#and judging by her various interviews GA takes great offense at scully being perceived as sexless#okay ramble done. i think#i have yet to write my All Things essay. there will be more of that#but later

x files studies but this time I tired to achieve that VHS feeling. I very vaguely remember watching some episodes as a kid, and I think this is as close as I've ever got to recreating that memory of a small, grainy tv in a dark room

[skunked-up-kicks]

Omg... same... I don't remember my first reaction to that kevin-andrew staring line, but like for example, it took me a while to get why Nicky warned Neil not to look too much at Kevin. And when people interpret things sexually/romantically in the fandom I'm definitely surprised, like the cigarette pack in Andrew's back pocket turned into staring at his ass etc. I did find stuff like Andrew brushing Neil's back more telling, but I didn't read every moment from a sexual attraction lense u know

I don't know if my last ask made sense but basically same sometimes im like "oh you guys think this line is about attraction. ok. i didn't know that" i feel like i learnt to see the romance/attraction in most of it bc i remember i felt like neil for the longest time -- i didn't see the signs of 'attraction' a lot of the time, though i did see more blatant flirting

lil disclaimer thingy: i understand everyone reads book differently and is coming from different perspectives, and i'm not intending to shame anyone or anything, just wanna talk about my experience reading aftg.

so, if i'm being honest... i do genuinely find it so baffling that people read certain scenes (mainly book 1 scenes) as sexual. like you mentioned the infamous 'neil sussed the twins out by which one had a cigarette packet in their back pocket' scene that people have turned into 'neil was ogling andrew's ass'. which.. neil is a respectful king and would never, okay? i hate when ppl make him into a fucking creep :// but also it's a good example of an early moment in the series that showed how observant and clever neil could be so it also makes me sad that the moment got stripped of that in favour of it being sexual :(

anyway, besides sexual clearly not being how it's intended to be read, it's also weird to me because like... my mind was not at all in the place to be reading scenes as sexual when i first read that scene.

we've just been introduced to neil not that long ago, and he's been presented to us as a traumatized teenager who's been squatting in his highschool's gym locker room, seems to have a nicotine addiction, is really anxious, has seen his mum die, and i'm also pretty sure there's lines about how lonely neil is and about how much he's grieving his mum. not that long before the cigarette-in-back-pocket scene doesn't neil have a moment at the window where he thinks "one of us has to make it mum"??

what i'm very poorly trying to explain is that, at least when i first read the books, i was really attached to neil early on and more importantly i was really protective of him. cause he's a child really... and a very hurt and distressed one at that, who's in a new and clearly unsafe environment. andrew's group is not presented in a good light early on, so i was rightfully suspicious and untrusting of them. how people can be given a character like neil in a situation like that and be playing matchmaker almost immediately is... yeah.

like... my mind wasn't in the place to be going "oooo neil thinks one of them has a nice ass!!🥴🥴"... LIKE? the scenes before certainly aren't set up in a way that's leading you down that train of thought...

it's the same as the scene where neil puts andrew's hand under his shirt, people talked about seeing that as sexual too. but andrew's been raped literally like 2 or 3 pages ago??? when i read those kinds of posts i can't help but think "how is this what's on your guys minds right now??..."

plus, when people say they saw these moments as sexual attraction they are often also implying they were thinking "maybe they'll get together". which is why i mentioned that i didn't trust andrew's group, cause i assumed everyone else felt the same, so i also assumed that like me they wouldn't be thinking of neil possibly getting with any of them... cause if you don't think they're trustworthy... why would you? i just wanted to protect neil from them ngl :') the only other character i liked at the time besides neil was wymack cause he actually showed that he cared about neil's wellbeing.

even that scene where andrew runs his fingers also neil's back, i honestly thought andrew was trying to intimidate neil... cause i didn't fucking like or trust andrew! he had non-con drugged not that long ago and i was still pissed at him and his group at the time. plus, andrew had used touching neil as a way to try and intimidate him before that so. even if i had picked up on the fact that andrew was attracted to neil from that during my first read, i wouldn't have thought they'd be getting together, or even wanted them too lol.

also because, aside from what i've said, there was also the fact neil told us he didn't swing... some scenes happened before that but most that people talk about happened after. if i'm reading a book and i'm having moments where i'm thinking maybe someone is attracted to the main character it's because i assume something might actually happen!

but i believed neil was aro/ace and so i wasn't looking for moments of neil being attracted to people, or moments of others being attracted to him. i never really bothered trying to read between the lines, it never even crossed my mind for so long... cause i had already set my mind on "neil won't end up with anyone". i only remembering it occurring to me at the "doesn't mean i wouldn't blow you" scene.

and honestly, when that happened i remember thinking something like "andrew's gonna end up getting rejected". idk? i never doubted neil was aspec, i started off thinking he was aro/ace like i said but i never went "oh he's gay", i just went "oh so he's not aro/ace but he's somewhere on the spectrum of being asexual".

and also tbh... i liked that neil never thought of things sexually. it was nice :'( and seeing his own thoughts and actions getting interpreted in that way, especially after we should have been under the assumption he wasn't interested in things like that... it rubs me the wrong way.

(i know aro/ace ppl can have relationships and/or have sex, but the way neil presented his sexuality and acted when hit on. to me, it made it seem like he was completely uninterested in either)

i can understand going back through the book after reading for the first time and being like "oh andrew's actions or words here might have been partially motivated by his attraction to neil at the time!", but through the first read? and for neil?? it's weird to me...

this is quite long so sorry bout that lol, i think i'll leave it here. it's nice to see someone else feel a similar way anyway ;^;

again, i don't think it's wrong if people read it differently. it just confuses me cause it's so different from my experience reading it and what i would expect it to be like for others

[aro-ace-advice]

okay so i’ve been officially in a relationship for about 3 months now. It’s been wonderful and i think i really love my partner. for context this is my first true relationship outside of “i like you let’s hold hands for a week in between class and then break up by friday” in middle school, and my partner has been in a relationship before and has kissed someone before. we hang out a lot, and have alot of time to hang around with our group of friends, and when we do we’re all usually at a picnic table or something similar. we usually don’t do much more physically than hold hands and cuddle, and i honestly like that, however they started expressing that they wanted to maybe kiss me and that scares me, its absolutely terrifying and i don’t know why. i didn’t tell them this and he ended up sorta kissing me, it was more like a peck on the lips but it scared me so much. as soon as i got home that night i texted them and told them that i didn’t think i was ready for that. why am i not ready for that?

i relate to alot of ace/aro experiences like not being attracted to people i just see off the street,noticing when someone like a celebrity is attractive but it’s not like i want to think about dating them, and i value personality over anything else in a relationship.

I don’t know what to do because not kissing my partner makes me think that i’m not being a good partner to them but it’s terrifying and even if it was just a peck last time i don’t want to do it again any time soon. and i don’t think that i really fit under ace or aro perfectly, i want a relationship, i want to have someone to love, im not hyper sexual but i’ve thought about it and it doesn’t scare me/revolt me. I’m afraid that if i identify as ace then it will mess up my relationship, especially if i find out that i actually am not later down the line. is this asexuality or is this just me being scared of something new.

hi bestie! first off if you decide to identify as ace for now and it fucks up your relationship then it's not the relationship for you. for some people that is a dealbreaker, and that's fine, everyone has their preferences. but the person you decide to commit to, if you decide to commit to anyone at all, should be accepting of your sexuality.

whether or not you're a good partner has nothing to do with kissing or not kissing, it has to do with your willingness to communicate your discomfort and to trust your partner with it. as to why you're not ready? only you can figure out why, i certainly can't tell you. maybe it's just an emotional commitment you're not ready for yet.

secondly, if you don't like kissing, that's fine. if you don't want to kiss your partner, it's fine, and that doesn't mean anything's wrong with you, and it doesn't necessarily mean you're queer, either. it might just mean you don't like kissing. asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction specifically, it doesn't have to have anything to do with the action of sex itself, or any of its potential precursors like kissing. nobody fits under ace or aro perfectly. it's called an umbrella term for a reason: it covers a spectrum. you can pick and choose the parts of it that fit you, and call yourself whatever you want-- it's nobody's business but yours. you don't have to worry about the label if you don't want to, and you don't need to use one to "excuse" your discomfort over something. just be honest with your partner about how you feel, and if you feel as if you might want to use the ace/aro label, experiment with it. there's no rush. if you decide to use the label for now and decide later on that you've changed your mind and it doesn't fit, that's fine.

base your discovery and experimentation of your sexuality (or lack thereof) on what's best for you, not on what will be best for your relationship. it's not good to make your decisions, especially about your labels or your journey in self discovery, out of fear.

communicate with your partner about this! i hope that they are supportive of you :)

[sapphothetical]

omg for advice idk exactly what im asking but im confident that im a lesbian but im scared to kiss a girl for feat that i wont like it. i always wanted to kiss a boy and when i finally did i hated it and soon after realized i was a lesbian, but i cant shake the fear that i wont actually like being w a girl since i had similar expectations for guys

ok ok good question. i know how you feel, i was with a guy when i realised i was a lesbian (i’m not anymore but i used to be). ok so i know that kisses can be really scary, i think we’ve all been there. i would say that maybe try kissing a friend first?? or someone you are comfortable talking to beforehand as this is important. also, even if kissing a girl scares you, that’s ok because kissing does get easier but also you might fall somewhere on the aro//ace spectrum?? it’s ok if you do or don’t either way but maybe you want to consider it (?) anyways, i don’t mean to make you question anything!! but the best thing you can do in these situations is be patient with yourself, and give yourself time. talk to your partner/whoever you plan on kissing and i promise things will get easier after your first kiss.

thank you for the ask anon and most of all try not to overthink anything too much as this will just stress you out even more!!

lots of love and take care,

pip <3

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

oohohoho you just opened the deepest can of worms on the planet

-mod dave, who wrote a fucking ten mile essay

first off, addressing the second anon, no theyre all humans. h., half humans at least. cause yall know me i fucking love my humanstuck aus off my ASS

(that would be funny as hell though. a troll from space walking into a camp on earth going “I AM THE SON OF ONE OF YOUR EARTH GODS. BITCH” like... holy shit)

so first things first their parents. im gonna lay this out, the beta kids and trolls are all greek (EXCEPT sollux hes roman cause his parent has no greek equivalent), and all the alpha kids and trolls are those gods roman equivalents (,,EXCEPT dirk cause he kinda balances sollux being roman out). i havent figured out how thatd happen like 16+ times yet cause in the percy jackson books theres only ever been one instance of two siblings of the same godly descent being greek and roman respectively in HISTORY so like.. i guess th. i guess thats just not a problem in this au

anyway this gets really long so im gonna talk about the beta kids and trolls cause i havent elaborated on the alphas at all ((peep the tags if you wanna see their parents though))

johns the son of zeus, rose is the daughter of athena, dave is the son of apollo, and jade is the daughter of demeter. they were all raised in their respective states, all had to come to new york for various reasons. jades been there the longest, shes been there 9 years and shes been on a couple quests. her biggest accomplishment so far is how she protected the camp from this big vicious angry hellhound that got past the barrier. naturally the girls fluent in Dog Training, so she steps up and instead of trying to kill this thing, she reaches out and tames it as fast as she can. it ends up actually working, and ever since that day she, her cabin, and the camp have a whole bodyguard sleeping right outside the demeter cabin! hes her steed in battle and hes a Very Good Boy. and his name is becquerel

johns the newest kid at camp, he has no idea who he is or why the fuck his school got attacked or why in the hell those anemoi thuellai were so fixated on him or HOW in the hell he absorbed the lightning one threw at him and ended up fine,,, hes just a big mess right now. a big enough mess that when he got claimed by literally zeus, no one else was around, he shrugged it off as some basic magical happening, and he stayed in the hermes cabin far longer than he should have cause no one! fucking knew he got claimed! by zeus of all people! dumbass. he ends up figuring it out though. like an off-hand mention about how this “weird lightning thing appeared above my head a couple weeks ago, haha weird right?” once he figures it out he realizes “hey i might be able to fly” so he sneaks off into the woods to try it. he succeeds fairly quickly but god almighty everyones face the one day the dude just yote himself off a small cliff without warning,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

dave and rose are really tight, theyve been there roughly the same time length, and since their cabins are across from each other they just bother each other all the time. daves the resident Doctor even though he really doesnt look it cause hes got the apollo powers. apollo is the medicine god. so if you wound your stupid ass in battle daves in the ER room patching you up with his glowy hands. rose on the other hand is a very good strategist. shes one of the only athena kids ever recorded to actually have a power - telekinesis. she has no idea how she developed it, she thinks its from birth, but it freaks her out. shes training it though.

so the beta trolls, are also all human(ish). aradias hades kid. but i pulled a pjo trope on her based on one of my favorite characters (im not saying for spoilers, but if you recognize the situation, You Probably Know Who Its Based Off) and aradia died. her mom, the handmaid, had been pulling some Shady Ass Shit and ended up getting herself killed, but aradia tried saving her and ended up going down with her.

so handmaid gets sentenced to the fields of punishment in the underworld, and aradia gets sentenced to elysium, heroes paradise. shes like “no i want my mom to be okay” so they take that away from aradia and they put them both in the fields of asphodel, the neverending grey space for Not So Good But Not So Bad people. her mom becomes a shade (shadow spirit, no human resemblance), as all people do, but aradia. doesnt? and she gets dunked in the fucking river lethe and if you dont know what that does it erases your memory. so she just. comes out of the river like “hello? wgat tae fukc goin on??” but she still remembers one thing. there was an ��a” in her name.

tavros is the son of hermes, hes just kinda taken on the role of backup counselor for when the actual cabin counselor is out. hes in a wheelchair, but he also has prosthetic legs for when he needs to actually stand up and fight. hes really good at it too. also catch him in winged converse cause he Owns Those and Uses Them To His Advantage. hes trying his best to keep focused on the camp, cause aradia was his childhood friend, he misses her a whole lot, she never got to camp in the first place. and to his knowledge, shes still dead.

sollux is a janus kid. thats a problem cause janus is roman, and this is a greek camp. he grew up with dave, he showed up with dave, hes been at camp as long as dave. but hes been unclaimed since he showed up so he thinks hes unwanted by whatever parent he has. he knows hes a demigod, he got through the camp barriers, so what the fuck is wrong with him? he also feels shitty cause hes shit at the greek lessons, he cant read a lick of it which literally every demigod without exception should be able to do, he cant name any gods- well, he can, but.. he gets their names mixed up. why does he keep calling poseidon “neptune”? and he has a much, much different way of natural fighting than other kids. they slice, he jabs. he wasnt taught to jab. 

karkat is an aphrodite kid with vitiligo, and to make matters worse, hes ace and on the aro spectrum. to make matters WORSE, the aphrodite kids are kinda notorious for being really shallow, really materialistic, and really mean. karkats been dubbed the “runt” of the cabin, he gets made fun of for his spots to the point where he uses make up and magic to conceal them. worst of all? hes the kid of the goddess of love, for fucks sake. being reminded that “loveless people shouldnt be able to stay in this cabin, mom must have made a mistake claiming you” is kind of.. a blow to the self esteem. long story short he hates aphrodite for claiming him, and would have rather stayed in the hermes cabin. but he eventually goes on this big quest thats vague as fuck right now but Its The Main Plot, he ends up proving to himself that hes worth something and that his siblings are wrong, and my FAVORITE LINE IN THE WHOLE THING i came up with is HIS when he deals a final blow to some big monster: “REMEMBER MY FACE THE NEXT TIME YOU REINCARNATE. MY NAME IS KARKAT VANTAS, I’M THE SON OF APHRODITE, AND LOOKS CAN KILL.”

nepeta isnt anywhere near developed as others are unfortunately, shes a daughter of ares and shes really really good at hand to hand combat. shes small but she leads groups of people in things ranging from camp volleyball games to actual literal wars. shes a tough little shit

kanaya isnt really developed either, i have yet to figure out most of her powers too actually, shes a daughter of iris, the rainbow goddess though. (blatant reference to both kanayas vampirism and. h. her. sh. es ga. gay) ONE THING SHE CAN DO THOUGH is iris message at will without water or drachmas so really shes just everyones go to cell phone and its fucking hilarious cause people just come into the cabin like “KANAYA I NEED TO TALK TO [X]” and shes like “You Better Fucking Pay Me I Am Not Your Personal Cell Phone”

terezi is the daughter of nemesis and she has this really peculiar power she hasnt really gotten the hang of yet. she has synesthesia, so while she cant see she can smell and taste the colors of her surroundings and its really helpful. sometimes though she gets messages from her mom. they dont even come as dreams half the time, they come as almost a different plane altogether. tez has the power to literally tip the scales, pretty much. and when she gets like that, she can see. shes not on earth though, shit on earth stops when shes like that. shes just kinda In Her Own Head, i guess? and in her head she holds the two scales in her hands. she is the arms of the scale. and depending on which one she lifts up, she can literally alter the fate of the battle or happening thats going on By Herself. once she chooses she just whooshes back to real life though and nothing has changed. the only downside? it takes a LOT of energy and cant be exploited for little things. her one thing on her bucket list is to tap into said powers while getting something from a vending machine so like three things will fall out but it hasnt happened yet and shes upset

vriskas a daughter of tyche, the luck goddess, come the fuck on you knew i was gonna, i havent really elaborated on her either and im upset about that. but hey now you get a break from all those fucking paragraphs

equius is a hephaestus kid, and he kinda stays in the background. hes a range fighter, he spends a lot of time in the forge, and even though its been a project looooong since forgotten, hes been excavating the tunnels under cabin nine for years. by himself. he has no idea where they lead, but dammit hes gonna find out where. he has no idea about a certain bunker in the woods though...

gamzees just there for a fucking laugh tbh hes a son of dionysus and i love that cause hes the god of wine and parties and insanity. usually gamzees just zoning out somewhere hes Not supposed to be, and hes not affected by the maenads FUCKED UP BULLSHIT that goes down the forest sometimes. also hes so fucking scared of tavroses wing shoes he tried them on once while he was high and JESUS CHRIST

eridan is the son of kymopoleia, a SUPER obscure goddess. lets just say dont fuck with eridan cause his mom is the goddess of violent sea storms,

and naturally, feferi is the daughter of poseidon. cause who the FUCK else would she be the daughter of. WHO. NAME ONE GOD

OH AND JUST CAUSE I FORGOT CALLIE AND CALIBORN ARE SATYRS IN THIS AU. CALLIE HAS PAN PIPES. and caliborn still has a gun

[purplepersnicketywrites]

7 PLEASE!!!!!

things you said while we were driving

👌👌👌

___

“Did you know that people like to talk about serious things during car journeys a lot?” Eijirou said, watching Bakugou from the corner of his eye. The blond didn’t take his own eyes off the road. “Something about the liminal nature of the car journey makes it seem like a safer time to open up about stuff. The conversation doesn’t exist in a physical place but no one can just walk away from it.”

“Liminal,” Bakugou snorted. “You sound like Kaminari.” 

“Maybe I heard it from him,” Eijirou said.

Silence rolled around Bakugou’s car for a few moments.

“So, you got a serious thing you only want to talk about in a car?” Bakugou asked.

Eijirou fidgeted in his seat.

“Maybe,” he said, slowly. “Kinda.”

“Well- Fucking bastard use your indicators what the fuck- I’m all ears if you do wanna-”

“I’m gay.”

Eijirou bit his lip. Shit, he hadn’t meant to just blurt that out. His heart was pounding, he didn’t want his best friend to freak out or-

“Okay,” Bakugou said.

Huh. Eijirou turned to look at Bakugou properly. “Okay?”

“Uh, thanks for trusting me, I guess?” Bakugou said, glancing at Eijirou before turning back to the road. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re supposed to say about this stuff. Er, I support you? That shit.”

“Oh, thank you!”

Well, that had gone better than expected. A little awkward, maybe, but Bakugou definitely wasn’t freaking out. They were still friends. All was well. At least Eijirou hadn’t mentioned the enormous crush he’d had on the blond since like, forever.

Bakugou coughed. “So, I’m not exactly straight either.”

“Oh. Oh! I mean, uh, cool?” Eijirou said. “Or, thanks? You’re right, it is hard to know what to say.”

Bakugou snorted. “Yeah.”

“I support you, too.”

“You not gonna ask what I am, then?” Bakugou asked, looking over at Eijirou as they pulled up at a red light.

“That’s up to you,” Eijirou said. “I wouldn’t wanna, like, pressure you into telling me stuff that you don’t wanna tell me.”

“Fucking hell, Kirishima, you’re my best friend,” Bakugou said, the car jumping forwards as the light dropped back down to green. “What wouldn’t I want to tell you?”

Eijirou blinked. “Uh.”

“I’m ace,” Bakugou said. “Maybe aro too? Or something along that spectrum. I dunno. It’s weird.”

Well that was- Huh. Eijirou nodded. “Alright.”

“Ugh, that’s enough ‘serious’ shit for one drive,” Bakugou said, voice gruff.

Eijirou couldn’t help but agree.

___

“Stay in the fuckin’ lines!” Bakugou hissed.

“I am in the lines,” Eijirou shot back, steering the car around the corner. “Like, distinctly within them!”

“Then slow d- Shit!” Bakugou scrabbled for the handle thing on the car’s ceiling. So dramatic.

Eijirou shook his head. “Dude, you’re really bad at being a passenger.”

“Fuck you!”

“Bro, I’m sticking to the speed limit, im in all the right lanes,” Eijirou said. “I’m driving fine, you’re just a control freak.”

“When we get to the stupid restaurant after the thing,” Bakugou said, pressing himself back into the seat. “I’m gonna disembowel you.”

“That might make it hard for me to eat anything.”

Bakugou grumbled to himself and swore again when Eijirou braked for another car pulling off to a side road.

“What, you wanted me to run into his back?” Eijirou asked.

“No, you moron! You’re just braking too hard!” Bakugou snapped.

Eijirou rolled his eyes. “The interview is gonna go fine, man, you don’t need to drag me into your panic spiral.”

“Oh yeah, coming from the most sociable guy in the world that really means a lot,” Bakugou grouched. Wow, he was really turning up his Absolute Dick levels today, huh? “And I’m not panicking, dipshit. I just don’t want you to total my car.”

“Mmhm, sure,” Eijirou said.

“Don’t ‘mmhm sure’ me, asshole,” Bakugou said. Eijirou was sure his friend would be scowling fiercely at him but he knew if he took his eyes off the road to check he’d get yelled at even more. “I know where you live.”

“I know where you live,” Eijirou said. Just a few steps down the hallway from his own room, to the left. “Oh, speaking of, I think the front door needs oiling.”

“What, again?” Bakugou huffed. “I swear there must be someone with a rust quirk or some shit targeting our- Hey! Don’t fuckin’ distract me.”

Eijirou sighed. “Damn, and it very nearly worked.”

“Fuckin’, freeloading piece of- Ugh,” Bakugou growled. Real pleasant today, huh?

“Freeloading? Dude, I’m paying for the fuel to get you to this thing, and I’m paying for our meal afterwards,” Eijirou said. “That’s like the opposite of freeloading. If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”

Bakugou groaned like the over-theatrical diva he was. “Don’t use that fucking baby shit on me.”

“Don’t get so fucking snippy, then,” Eijirou barked.

Bakugou fell silent at that, and they drove on in uncomfortable quiet.

“Sorry,” Bakugou muttered after a few minutes. “I am panicking.”

“You know you don’t have to do this,” Eijirou said.

“You know it’s like- It’s fuckin’, solidarity or whatever,” Bakugou said, voiced toned down.

Eijirou grinned. “Yeah.”

“Hey, you remember your weird ‘serious car talk’ thing from a couple months ago?” Bakugou asked.

Eijirou nodded.

“That was kinda the first time I told anyone,” Bakugou said. “Now I’m telling the whole fuckin’ world.”

“You know what that is? Growth.”

Bakugou snorted. “Man, shut up.”

“Seriously, dude, I’m proud of you for doing this,” Eijirou said, chancing a glance at his friend. Bakugou was looking away out of the side window and the tips of his ears were pink. Eijirou lookedback at the road. “Did you pin down anything more specific than aspec, or…?”

“Demi. Uh, demiromantic demisexual,” Bakugou said.

“Yeah?”

“Pretty sure, yeah,” Bakugou said.

Oh. Well. There were potentially some pretty big implications with that, weren’t there? Not that Eijirou really wanted to assume, but… He wanted to assume. If Bakugou was attracted to someone close to him, there wasn’t really anyone closer than Eijirou, right?

“Nice,” Eijirou said. It probably wasn’t the right time to say anything right now. Maybe at the restaurant? Or on the drive home? “It’s- I’m glad that you know who you are, Bakugou.”

Bakugou snorted. “Alright, that’s enough serious talk.”

“Too right,” Eijirou said, pulling into the car park outside the building Bakugou was having his interview in. “You’re gonna do great, man.”

___

“Hey,” Bakugou rolled the window down to scrutinise him. “You look like shit.”

Eijirou didn’t doubt it. Set him up against a villain or a point him at a civilian in need and he’d come out of work at the end of the day a little tired but fulfilled.

Present him with a stack of paperwork? Beaurocracy was the true villain.

“One of those days, I had to do maths,” Eijirou sighed, moving around to the other side of the car to get into it. He slumped down into the seat and closed his eyes. Bakugou called him a baby for complaining about it sometimes, but that was probably fair.

“Seatbelt.”

“I’m like, the one person who’d survive going through the windshield.”

“Yeah? And I don’t want your spiky ass smashing through my windshield, thanks. It’s also the law. Seatbelt or we’re not moving.”

Eijirou cracked his eyes open to put the seatbelt on with a huff and a groan. “Fine, fine, I’m ready for your magical mystery tour now. You gonna tell me where we’re going yet?”

“Nope.”

“I just wanna know if I have to socialise with people,” Eijirou said. “If it’s like, a party? I might just stay in the car, take a nap on the back- Bakugou why is my suitcase on the back seat?”

Eijirou stared at it. Definitely his - it was a pretty distinctive shade of red. Bakugou laughed from the driver’s seat.

“You think I’d willingly go to a party, Kirishima?” Bakugou asked. Well, no, that wasn’t exactly Bakugou’s style. Eijirou watched Bakugou put his car into first and frowned to himself.

“Are you kicking me out of the apartment?” Eijirou asked. He didn’t think it was very likely, because if Bakugou had any issues with him as a roommate then he’d definitely have brought them up before now.

Bakugou shook his head. “What the fuck? No. My stuff is in the boot.”

“So… We’re going somewhere?” Eijirou frowned some more. “For how long? Wait, what about the agency?”

“Two weeks, and I cleared this time for us ages ago,” Bakugou said.

“You did?”

Bakugou nodded.

Huh. Eijirou hadn’t seen it on the calendar - had Bakugou purposefully kept this a secret? A… holiday? For the pair of them? Eijirou could feel his heartbeat pick up a little.

There weren’t many things in life that Eijirou regretted, but falling asleep in the car on the way back from the restaurant after Bakugou’s coming-out interview was on that list. It sort of felt like he’d missed his chance to ask Bakugou out.

He’d been dithering over trying again ever since. A holiday, though, that was- It could be the perfect time to say something.

“Okay.”

“That’s it?” Bakugou asked. “Okay? No wheedling away trying to convince me to spill?”

Eijirou grinned. “Nope.”

“You don’t even know if we’re driving there or taking a plane,” Bakugou said. “You’re normally infuriatingly curious.”

“Oh I know we’re not gonna take a plane, you’d be way more stressed,” Eijirou said.

Bakugou grumbled under his breath.

Eijirou snickered behind one of his hands. “Besides, I trust you, man. You’re not gonna go anywhere we’d hate so I’m happy to wait for the surprise!”

“That’s sappy, fuck off,” Bakugou complained, but Eijirou could see the tips of his ears turn pink. It made all the butterflies in Eijirou’s stomach go wild.

“I’m always sappy,” Eijirou said, watching the side of Bakugou’s handsome face.

Bakugou flicked a glance at him. “I guess I don’t hate it.”

“Ha, high praise indeed!” Eijirou grinned and closed his eyes. He probably needed that nap, anyway, and-

“I like you.”

Eijirou’s eyes snapped open. “What?”

Bakugou’s shoulders were hunched up, his ears had changed from pink to bright red, and he was biting his lip as if he hadn’t intended to say that.

“You heard me.”

“I did, uh,” Eijirou floundered for a moment. “Good. Great! Same here! I mean, I like you, too, not that I like me. Uh, not that I don’t like me, but I don’t like me in the way that I-”

“Kirishima,” Bakugou said, voice warm, and Eijirou’s jaw clacked closed at high speed.

“It should probably be Eijirou,” Eijirou said, watching Bakugou’s shoulders relax.

“Eijirou,” Bakugou said. Or Katsuki, maybe? Whatever, it sent shivers down Eijirou’s spine either way. “Date me.”

Eijirou laughed. “Yeah. Yeah, definitely. Best serious-talk ever.”

Katsuki was grinning now, too. “When we reach where we’re going I’m gonna wanna kiss you.”

“Oh yeah?” Eijirou asked, tilting his head. “Funny coincidence - I’m gonna wanna kiss you back.”

___

“Can I serious-talk?”

“Ugh, fine.”

“Just wanted to tell you that I love you.”

“Again? Wow. Gross.”

“Katsuki!”

“Heh, you know I love you too, Eijirou.”

[ineffablefool]

(1/4) hey uh ur bio says that u r demiromantic and if it's not too much trouble could i get some help? so i'm starting high school next year and so far, i haven't gotten a crush or anything. romantic attraction? don't know her. but whenever i thought or pictured myself "grown up" i imagined myself with a boyfriend. (i'm a woman) all the evidence is pointing towards me being aromantic, but a little slice of my brain is still, "oh, you're just super demiromantic and violently straight, all of your

(2/4) super close friends have been girls, you just have to become really close friends with a guy and there! instant boyfriend" but i know that won't happen. i won't have some man come and suddenly i'm head over heels. but i've always figured i'd have a boyfriend. i know i'm ace, and i am calling myself ace, but whenever i go to call myself aro, my brain goes "but what if ur actually demi and then all the people you told u were aro will think you were a liar" which i kNOW is stupid but i cant

(3/4) stop thinking it. i dunno why i can't fully accept the fact that i'm aro. is it society claiming that you need a partner to be happy? is it the fact that being in love sounds amazing and like floating on clouds and i want to feel like that? i have no fucking clue. and it's not something against aros, like, i know that if someone told me they were aro i'd have no problem with it. which makes it worse because why is it so hard to let go of the fantasy that i'll have a romantic partner one

(4/4) day? i know, in my heart, that there is a like a 1% chance i wont be aro. but i still cant call myself aro my brain won't let me >:( when did you get your first crush? when is it normal for a demi to first feel romantic attraction? did you think you were aro at first? also i sometimes feel like i shouldn't call myself ace bc im too young to know if i like sex yet? when did u start calling yourself ace? ugh sorry for the super long ask,,, also fun fact it's "how do u write kisses" anon hiii

Hi anon.  I cannot promise you excellent help, but I am still glad you wrote to me again, and I really hope you are about to have a straight 72-hour period of Good Days.  (It might take you that long to read this.  Oops.)

So, first of all: there is nothing wrong with calling yourself aro now and then later deciding you aren’t.  Or realizing you aren’t.  (Two different framings for the same thing -- both are good.)  Or deciding or realizing that you’re somewhere on the aromantic spectrum which you feel is better described with a more specific term.  Demiromantics are still part of the aro umbrella!  It’s not an exclusive club where You Must Be Pure Aro To Enter!  (Anyone who tells you otherwise is setting themselves up as Decider Of What It Really Means To Be Aro, and where are their credentials for that?  Hmm, hypothetical gatekeeping person?  Can I please see your certification from the Institute Of Defining Other People’s Identities For Them?  Oh.  Oh you don’t have one.  Because it doesn’t exist.)

Me saying that doesn’t magically make your brain accept the label, of course.  I am just trying to gently show your brain the door, and it’s the one that has to walk through it.

Assuming you want it to walk through it.  Maybe you decide you don’t.  That’s fine!  But “yes, I am indeed aro -- I am on the aro spectrum somewhere so I am using the label” is a perfectly fine thing to tell people, and if they are not carrying forged credentials from the Institute Of Defining Other People’s Identities For Them, then they will probably be okay with this.

I am not any kind of expert on being aro, or ace, or anything.  I am only an expert in being me.  But to somewhat exhaustively answer the questions from your last part...

I had my first crush when I was thirteen or fourteen.  When I was about ten, I was friends with two girls who both had a very public crush on the same boy, and I claimed to also have one on him in order to fit in, but I was completely lying.  Sorry, Drew.  I’m sure you were quite the catch, but I was not feelin’ it.

I don’t know if there’s a specific time when it’s “normal” for a demiromantic person to start feeling any particular way.  It just sort of happens if it’s gonna.  Maybe it never does.  People are complicated and different and that’s wonderful.

I didn’t know what being aro (or being ace!) was when I was your age, because they weren’t really identities yet.  “Asexual” was for amoebas, or maybe robots.  “Aromantic” was, like, dude, did you misspell “aromatic”?  (Keep in mind, there was technically an Internet in approx. 1995, but there was no Google, no Wikipedia, no YouTube, no social media, the concept of what is now called a “blog” didn’t even really exist yet, and often your parents would not let you on the Internet connection if they could even afford it themselves, not least because it was frequently billed by the amount of time you spent using it. It was incredibly hard to know what things existed in the world back then to even begin to learn about them! Now is so much better. I have all the treasures of the world in my pocket via my telephonic device.)  When I started to learn about asexuality, specifically that you could be ace but not be “an emotionless robot” (gosh has unlearning that kind of judgement been a journey), I jumped straight on that label and never looked back (this was roughly when I joined Tumblr, so I would have been about 32).  I thought I was alloromantic for a while after that, but I’ve come to realize that my feelings on romance probably put me somewhere on the aro spectrum.  And that’s where I am now.

I started calling myself ace, again, when I was about 32, but I didn’t have that label available to me when I was younger.  Ya boi was 13-14 years old, sitting in his bedroom writing letters-to-never-be-sent to his crush, which included long sections about how I had already decided I would never have sex so long as I lived, so once we obviously got married because how could we not when I had such Emotions, he would have to find some other way to get that if he wanted it.  I had no interest in it then.  I never developed an interest in it since.  If I had had the knowledge I have now, back when I was in junior high, I am absolutely convinced that I would have taken the ace label then.  Was I too young to know for sure?  I dunno, we don’t say that people are too young at that age to know they’re heterosexual, so why do other sexualities have to pass a higher bar?  (Because compulsory heterosexuality.  That is why.)

Regardless of your age, if the label of ace resonates with you, you can apply it to yourself.  If the label of aro resonates, you can apply it to yourself.  Or a more specific variant of either, or something else entirely.  And the day you realize “oh gosh, this is not, in this moment, actually me”, you can let the label go, because its only purpose for existing is to be useful to you.

Finally -- this is not something I can personally speak to, but I have seen people who identify as completely aro also state that they enjoy things that our (my? I do not know where you are from) culture frequently sees as romantic.  Like, if you want to have a person who you can snuggle up with, hold hands with, say “I love you” to and have them say it back and both of you mean it -- there are aro people who do all that with their partners, and enjoy it, and don’t see it as interfering with their aromantic identity at all.  I believe them, because they are the expert on being themselves, and I have nowhere near the ego required to decide that I know better.  So that’s something to keep in mind -- cloud-floating and an aromantic identity do not have to be completely separate, because there are lots of kinds of love and of affection, and people are complicated, and that is wonderful.

I hope you enjoy this novel, anon.  It is for you.

[th3okamid3mon]

“It’s ok to not know yet” 

This is an artwork for pride month. I feel a bit ok and not ok presenting this because it’s the first time I present myself as part of this community but I also dont feel I am part of it? Either way, here’s this!

Insta | Youtube | Twitter | Paypal | Patreon | dA | Picarto

If you want to read some personal experience stuff, there’s more below the cut. 

It’s pride month so I made a piece. I have a couple troubles identifying with this community due to not knowing entirely where I belong. I know I may be in the Ace spectrum, I just dont know at an extent? It’s way too tiring to think about it. 

I thought I was aro but I kind of wish for a relationship at some point i guess? (It has never been my objective in general) I thought I was ace but I dont think Im entirely repulse to it? (I do not have an attraction to people either? Unless there’s some kind of knowledge? The only way I like physically some “public people” are due to their personality and humor and just the way they talk, case in point The Grumps) Might be demi but every person I became friends with are my bestest friends? 

I’m 22 and I’m still a bit confused about this but at the very least I know I’m not really crazy. Always thought something was off about me but didnt bothered me until years later (Since I was little I knew I had something different. Classmates always talked about who they liked, which celebrity was their secret boyfriend, an ex friend used to pair me with a celebrity and I was so confused because I never liked any celebrity like other people do?) 

It’s alright to keep searching or to not know exactly a part of yourself, there’s still time to know. No one knows you better than you. 

[seraphic-sapphic-safehaven]

this is rly awkward but i dont feel lgbtq enough. like im afab and only into guys so i call myself straight. and i call myself cis too even though rly i identify as a genderqueer girl but i still feel like thats not lgbtq enough so i just call myself cishet

oh, forgot to add that im on the aroace spectrum but i still dont feel lgbtq enough ahah (this is the anon that identifies as cishet even though shes not rly cis)

I mean, iunno what to tell you other than being genderqueer makes you LGBTQ+. Genderqueer is a nonbinary identity. Nonbinary people are trans. Trans people are LGBTQ+. Being aspec makes you LGBTQ+, too; apsecs have always been a part of this community. No one really gets to dispute any of that either; those are just facts.

Calling yourself straight is fine if you feel that's the best label for you. But cishet? You're not cis, so you wouldn't be cishet.

I know exclusionists and transphobes are really loud, especially online, but they're a small minority. I promise: You are definitely LGBTQ+ enough 💕🏳️‍🌈

Feel free to go through my aspec positivity, ace positivity, aro positivity, aroace positivity, and genderqueer positivity tags. I think they might make you feel better 😊

[luckilyiambrave]

you've only been kissed on the cheek one time? i love to kiss people on their cheeks is just so cute! also i feel u with the sexuality crisis, my "crush" or whatever the fuck she is kissed me once(well repeatedly after that) just because we were both having doubts about each other an such, now the thing is we tried dating and we lasted two days bc i gay panicked and she still had feelings for her ex, anyway i think i like her and i can't process this shit

and she was like "i think i wanna kiss you, i know you're aro ace but don't you wanna try" and here's the thing i thought i was aro ace but i was just in denial (still am) bc I've never liked anyone and i genuinely thought that, but then we kissed and all of that happened and i have a big ass sexuality crisis and i still on it and i just don't know how to feel about her, and i feel bad for taking the label of aroace before :(( idk why im telling you this i just been repressing it for so long im just so conflicted??? almost every dream i had since the incident (about 3 months ago) has involved her, kissing her, being with her, and i just.... i dont wanna be in a relationship with her even.... or maybe i do i don't even know, she's my best friend and im not even sure of what im feeling AGHHHHHHH god sexuality and relationships are just so complicated but also being in denial doesn't help the situation

A: i can't help but feel you on A LOT of these things actually. Even though, yeah ,I haven't legitimately kissed anyone except for the cheek kiss that made me blush for rest of that day. I've thought about kissing people and my feelings are just a big mess as is. I repress a whole lot of shit which i think has a lot to do with guilt too. I used to identify on the ace spectrum and sometimes i see people around me show me affection and i like???? push them away i guess. idk if it's from having a first relationship on online which made me think “i can't kiss a person 700 miles away from me." and it stuck. So for a long time I thought maybe I am ace or flux or whatever you know. Then I realized that ace didn't feel right, wasn't me. People still get an ace vibe from me because I'm so quiet about anything remotely intimate there's more more to that. The thing is though I want that connection with a person. It's just another story when people actually do it. I do whole gay panic thing because I don't know if they are just being nice??? THE DREAMS I've had the whole kissing your best friend dream a lot. It's all fun and games until they decide to slip into your subconscious. My old best friend told me about her first kiss with with a girl and she told me that it was just "fun" (as in like she didn't see herself with girls in a serious relationship and there she was kissing girls. ) to her which rubbed me a bit wrong because i knew she had to be in love with this other girl that's she's still obsessed with to this day. I might have hinted that I liked her once (in theory) probably shouldn't have. and then she slipped in my dreams but we're kinda distant now.sexuality is such a finicky thing between different people because we all have different experience. But lately, like you I've been having dreams about someone who I think genuinely cares for me that I see a lot of and then there's me trying to repress it all because i don't think a relationship would work. But I usually don't feel for people like this and my brain in my dreams is like TOO BAD! GENTLE HEAD TILT AND KISS NO THOUGHTS. ONLY KISS. I don't know how to feel either. tldr: you might have feelings and that's okay! sometimes feelings are messy and sometimes they don't have mean anything at all. and labels change don't ever feel like you have to be this one thing forever because you meet different people along the way. I hope we figure this out eventually but till then cheers to repressing feelings?

[astralaspecs]

i just had a talk with my bf and he brought up the possibility that im aro and now I'm questioning,,, im already pretty sure I'm on the ace spectrum but i thought i felt romantic attraction for sure but now i don't know? i think one part of me always wanted to be arospec but i don't know why and i don't feel like I'd be aro enough anyway to really count. idk exactly what my point is i guess im just here to vent

The only person who can know for sure is you, so your bf might be wrong, but if you actively want to be aro-spec and just feel like you're not aro "enough," that might be an indicator that you are indeed aro-spec.

I'm greyromantic, and I often feel like I'm not aro "enough" either, and it's really hard to tell whether you feel romantic attraction or not. There's no rush, and no one can tell you who you are (though I can try to help lol), so let yourself question at your own place and go with whatever makes you feel most comfortable. You also might want to have a conversation with your boyfriend about what makes him think you're aro, if you think that would be helpful for you.

--Mod Rusty

[iaconic-moved-blog]

i also had a tipsy dude at the con just kinda look super confused at me cause he saw tiddies since i took my binder off and put on my sports bra because i was wearing it like all day at the con and i guess he heard me ordering food, saw tiddies, and with the power of alcohol had to ask me a lot of questions

i wasn’t mad or anything or even offended ( he told me he was tipsy but i already gathered he was either on something or just got back from a bar since we were in atlantic city and there’s just bars and casinos everywhere ). he just genuinely seemed curious about why 

and something i notice is that people think since im trans, it’s because “oh is it because you’re attracted to the opposite sex?” which yeah not great terminology but i’m not about to drop a whole essay to a stranger i will no doubt NEVER see again about the spectrum of gender and sex, especially when he was already tipsy. and then i had to explain that i’m ace and aro and i just feel more comfortable presenting as someone who uses he/him pronouns, and prefers to assumed as masc ( it was super late like near 3am and there was no way i was gonna try to explain being trans masc agender to a tipsy dude in a mcdonalds that late ) and i took my binder off because my chest needed a break, and the shirt i wore for that cosplay WAS tight, so my tiny b cups kinda popper out more than usual since i usually wear baggy tanks or baggy t-shirts

like my gender identity has nothing to do with my sexual/romantic orientation. im just a lil transitioning agender latine who still has his lil tiddies he wants to get rid of, but probably can’t until he’s got his bachelors and CAN finally get top surgery ( thank you job for having health insurance for part time employees that is the same insurance parents have which i KNOW does cover the surgery )

idk where i was going with this. it was just something that happened at the con. he was friendly, and joked with me a lil, and seemed to think i was trying to hard to be more masc cause i said “thanks man” and was like, “eyyy don’t be trying to pull that with that deep ass voice of yours” even though do that instinctively with strangers (that might be my own self conscious cause i kinda love the face of confusion people make when they open the door for all 5′1 of me and just this baritone voice says, “THANKS MAN” and then i smile and keep walking knowing they are now going, “wait-”