#im not apologizing for any of this i do not care

[skzfairyyydreamz]

Replaced? (Part7)

Genre: Skz smau, Text posts, Non!idolAu, Angst, friends to enemies, Mini series

Pairing: Bsf!skz , Fem!Reader, Stoner!Skz/Stoner!Reader, Bartender!skz, Club manager!Chan, Club security!Changbin, Bottle girl!Reader

Warnings: ‼️Slow build‼️strong language (obvi coming from the profanity queennnn) , mentions of alcohol and smoking, mentions of fighting, mentions of/implied SA, mentions of anxiety plz let me know if i missed anything!

A/N: thank you guys sooo much for all the love on this mini series, and my biggest apologies for the wait! i pinky promise NOT to take a whole month to post the next part!!! but with this series coming to an end prepare yourselves for non stop CHAOS DRAMA and ANGST! all feedback, reblogs, and replies are SAUR greatly appreciated !!! thank you for sticking around and reading my silly little stories!

© Skzfairyyydreamz - Plagiarism is a crime. Do not repost, alter, translate or copy without my consent.

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After what felt like 30 long and silent minutes of everyone collectively cleaning up the after math of that night, you finally broke the silence.. 

“Honestly Thank you guys sm for staying to help me with this crazy ass mess .. and you know…”  you spoke nodding your head in the direction of your bedroom referring to jeongin while avoiding saying his name like it was some type of bad omen.  

“No, Ofc!” Changbin spoke. 

“You know we wouldn’t leave you alone after all that happened tonight.” Felix added as he finished pushing all your furniture back into its designated places.  

“please" chris scoffed “as much time as we spend in this apartment, we’re practically your roommates! Ofc we’d stay to help out. ” he added as he came out the kitchen holding what sounded like a garbage bag full of empty solo cups and broken glass.  

“Girl go get some rest you're gonna need it, gimme that.” minho said while taking the broom and dustpan from your hands and shooing you away.  

“Agreed! ” Felix walked up behind you kissing the side of your head and gently rubbing your shoulders “You’re free to go shower and change or get comfy however you need darling.”  

“Nuh uh, you s-?” You turned around but he shut your protest down rather quickly. “I’m positive princess, go. We’ll take care of everything out here”  

“But -” 

“GO...I got it!” he turned you around ignoring the pout on your face as he nudged you in the direction of the hallway.  

It was nearly sunrise, and you were absolutely dreading the idea of having to face jeongin when he woke up. Even then in that moment walking into your bedroom to prepare for a shower, you dreaded even being in his presence. Just the thought of him possibly waking up at any given second was eating you alive, REGARDLESS to the sound of his grizzly bearlike snores and the sight of drool sliding down the sides of his mouth, indicating that he was VERY much sound asleep. However, You never even made it passed the doorframe of your room before the anxious knots in your stomach told you to turn around and run right back down that hallway.  

“ lix ... i cant- I cant do it.” you whisper panicked running up to him and grabbing his hand. 

“cant what baby ?”  “ i feel so nasty and guilty, i can't even look at him right now what if we wakes up!??”      

“ baby... first of all you have nothing to feel guilty for. And secondly, he slept through the sound of you trying bash sophies face in with glass liquor bottles...  I'm pretty sure that dude is not waking up any time soon my love” he let out a chuckle. “What if he does thoooo!??” you whined “ im not ready to face him babe what will i say to him huh??? Oh, hey there jeongin i just tried to kill your girlfriend because shes such a shitty unfaithful stupid little bitch, how did you sleep?” felix cackled out loud this time pulling you into a hug and kiss to calm your racing mind. “ okay okay I'll get your clothes for you, no worries princess”  

“ugh, thank you so much lix youre actually an angel“ 

“no problem jagi , tshirt or hoodie?”  

“hoodie” you continued to pout slightly , while trying to brush the weight of tomorrows worries away  “sweatpants or shorts?"

“shorts please” 

“mkay, be back in a jiff!!”  he began walking down the hall to your bedroom “pink towel, black loofa please!!” you yelled out to him. 

“you got it!” he answered back “you're so amazinggg, you deserved the world!! “ you thanked him aloud once more “ i already have her” he sing songed back to you as you smiled to yourself thanking the heavens you could go a least few more hours avoiding the inevitable.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           ~~~~~                                                                                                                                                                                           

“... no im telling you it was weird as fuck! Like her whole aura just completely changed when she saw him.” ( felix) 

“putting two and two together he clearly had to have said or done something to her for her to be so angry. We’ve known y/n for a long ass time and I've never seen her more mad than she was tonight.” (minho) 

“besides trying to murder sophie..” (changbin) 

“yes... besides that! Also not to mention his face was bright fucking red when we came back upstairs and they were the only two in the apartment.” (minho) 

“it WAS! Idk what happened but im pretty positive she smacked the shit out of him.” (changbin) 

“ hold on?... Yall left her ALONE  with that fucking scumbag?” lix raised his voiced stressfully running a hand through his hair as he scooted closer to the edge of the sofa, beginning to get more irritated by the conversation he and the boys were having. 

“WHOA! Hold on!” minho pointed at felix also scooting to the edge of his seat jumping quickly at the only opportunity he had to both calm felix down AND defend himself. “ it wasn't like that at all, the three of us went downstairs to get the birthday cakes out the car while y/n came upstairs because she had to use the bathroom. Alex was actually already here setting up his DJ equipment before y/n even got back!” 

“yeah thats true.. And that really only took about 10 minutes, truth be told. ” (chris) 

“and where tf was jeongin?!” (felix) 

“he and sophie had ran out to get ice” (changbin) 

“Listen, all i know is whatever happened it is NOT to be taken lightly. y/n is a tough girl and not much is going to make her cry so we WILL be getting to the bottom of this TODAY, THIS hour.” (chris) 

“ SHE CRIED!? ... oh imma kill him” felix let out a sinister almost emotionless chuckle as he slightly rocked back and forth in his seat being only seconds away from crashing out. 

“wait deadass? When??” (changbin) 

“im deadass. It was before the party started like right when the guests started arriving. I went in the kitchen just to chat with her and i noticed she was having a moment, she tried to brush me off but you know i always call her bluff.” (chris)

“and what did she say? Because Bin tried to ask what was wrong and she seemed too angry to even speak, she gave us a look but that was about it. she just poured herself a drink then went out to get some air on the balcony.”  (minho)

“ she didn't really tell me anything all she said was that she felt stupid and violated.. So ofc i told her i would handle that shit right then if she just told me what happened, but she insisted on dropping it and initially I wasn't going to but i just let it go and held her for a little bit once i saw her shed a few tears... however she did promise me that we would talk about it later and shes good for keeping a promise so ofc i trust her to do so.” (chris) 

“yeah... im ready to go to jail” Felix let out yet another emotionless chuckle. 

“okay, something definitely did happen between the two, yes. But lets just breathe and hear it from y/n first before we start collecting bail money.” ( changbin) 

“man fuck all that fr! I need answers this shit is really starting to eat at me” (felix) 

They were so caught up  in their conversation that they didnt even hear you come out the bathroom and back down the hallway. 

“So is sleep out of the question?” you spoke, making your Prescence known as they all snapped their heads in your direction. 

“entirely outta the question my love, we have quite a few things to talk about” felix responded patting the spot next to him on the sofa signaling you to sit and join the conversation.  

You hesitantly took a seat next to Felix on the sofa across from minho and chris, as changbin was sat in the loveseat to your right. Taking  a look around the room you let out a shaky sigh really not wanting to have this conversation after the hectic night you had but you knew you couldn't put it off any longer or they all would lose their fucking minds.  

“Take your time kiddo, no pressure.” Chris spoke softly sensing your body tensing up. 

“Whenever you're ready love, we trust you.” felix added holding your hand and kissing the back of your knuckles. 

“y/nnnnie dont look so upset” changbin spoke next “ you know we’re not here to scold you, you did nothing wrong we just want to protect you and know that you're safe.” 

“ we just want to know what happened is all babe.” felix pulled you into a hug and began rubbing your back to calm you down.  

“ i know i know...” you took a deep breath and let out another heavy sigh.  

“just relax a bit, I'll go make some tea.” minho spoke before getting up and walking to the kitchen.  

It took about an hour-long conversation to tell the guys what alex had did and explain everything in detail. Emotions were very high but somehow you were able to calm them all  down and convince them to let it go at least for now. Chris had kept insisting that you press charges against him but you let it be known that you genuinely didnt feel the need to because one, you were more than proud that you found the strength to defend yourself when you really needed to, plus you were almost positive that nasty smack you gave him would leave a bruising. Secondly, you knew that regardless to lix being calm in that moment, he was definitely still on hots and there would be absolutely nothing nobody could do to stop him from beating alex’s ass again the next time he saw him. So for you the score board was 3 to 1, in your head it was perfect girl math. (LMAO) and truth be told you really didn't want to get lix involved and have him end up with assault charges for beating this man's ass multiple times. You just wanted to let it go and forget it all for as long as you possibly could.  

After the conversation had died, everyone just sat in complete silence with their own thoughts for a few minutes. Tiredness, worry and deep frustration sketched over the faces of everyone in the room. Not that you didn't already know this but this moment made it so evident how much your friends and boyfriend truly, truly cared about you.  

“ughhh! That was alot..I need another blunt” Felix broke the silence with a deep sigh.  

You lifted your head off of his shoulder to get up from your spot on the sofa, reaching for your stash box sitting on the coffee table in front of you. “I’ll roll , yall can meet me on the balcony in 5” you left a kiss on the top of Felix's head before walking out to the balcony. 

A few minutes had passed before both chris and lix joined you on the balcony, while bin and minho stepped out on a breakfast run for you guys. It was a bit passed 7 a.m the sun was out and the birds were chirping. You sat in silence while the joint rotated between the 3 of you. What you would normally consider to be a beautiful morning, had actually become the one thing you were dreading the most. You tried to at least enjoy the morning breeze against your skin as you ignored the burning feeling in your chest that jeongin would be waking up pretty soon and you would then have to face yet another conversation you did NOT want to have.  

Just as you finished up your smoke session and went back inside you heard the door to your bedroom creak open with jeongins voice immediately following “hey, where's Sophie? She didn't stay?” 

“Speak of the fucking devil...” you whispered to yourself.  

“bro .. what exactly are you trying to say to me right now?!” jeongin raised his voice, you could see frustration visibly building within him.  

“jeong listen.. You really need to start seeing sophie for the person she truly is or youre gonna end up broken in the end.” you said as calmly as you could.  

“so what im supposed to breakup with her and end my relationship because you say so?!” 

“jeongin if you'd just calm down and listen to what i have to say you would understand where im coming from.”  

“well wtf are you saying y/n? Stop beating around the bush!” 

“basically me and sophie got into a fight last .. and it almost got physical.” 

“what?? y/n tell me you did not hit her?? what could have possibly happened while i was asleep for y'all to even get into it like that?!” 

“i didnt get the chance to but you can thank chris and felix for that” 

“so what youre telling me is that you get drunk and sassy then start picking fights with your friends? I swear you cant leave drunk women unattended for shit” jeongin rolled his eyes and ran a hand through his hair as he walked away to pick up his phone, most likely to check on his girlfriend. 

“wth? jeongin when i have i ever not been able to hold my liquor?! It was the end of the night the party was already over by that time and i had already sobered up, just shut up and listen for a moment.” 

He let out a sigh as he flopped down on the sofa with his eyes still glued to his phone “im listening” he replied with annoyance lingering in his tone of voice. 

There was a quick moment of hesitation as you shared a nervous look between chris and felix “ you know you're my best friend and i love you right?��   

Breaking his gaze from his phone, He finally looked up at you clearly super annoyed with the conversation at this point “ ...yes” he replied with a blank stare. 

“ and you know I'd never lie or do anything to hurt you right?” 

“right ... except try to beat up my girlfriend” he said in a low sarcastic tone rolling his eyes before looking at his phone again 

“it wasnt unprovoked, jeongin! theres more to that story!” 

“like i said , im listening!! But im not hearing shit?!” 

“sophie kissed me!” chris blurted out, not being able to take your stalling any longer.  

And just like, the air and the whole atmosphere of the room had entirely changed like a press of a button. His face went to stone as he stood up from the sofa with his phone tightly gripped in his hand.  

“what did you just say?” he raised his eyebrow challenging Chris in a cold tone. 

“she had been making advances and throwing herself at me from the moment you passed out in y/n’s room, i told her NO multiple times and she literally forced herself on me in the kitchen.” 

“bullshit!” he glared at Chris. 

“Lix and i walked in on it .. we literally seen it with our own eyes, jeong..” you defended Chris in the softest voice you could, really not wanting jeongin to get any angrier than he already was. 

“BULLSHIT!” he repeated, turning to scream in your direction this time. 

“YO! WATCH IT! Felix yelled back at him wasting no time to defend you. He quickly stood up in the middle of you two, reaching behind himself to grab your hand once he realized the loudness of his deep voice had startled you. 

“wtf is this some sick and twisted joke?!” 

“jeongin, mate ..we have no reason to lie to you. I know this is a lot to take in right now and its gonna be rough but Sophie is no good ... we’re your closest friends and we just want what's best for you.” chris tried to calm him even knowing that was likely not to happen. 

Jeongin said nothing, he just let out a sarcastic dry laugh as he walked away from the conversation. The apartment stood quiet waiting for him to return back to the living room. And when he did, he followed the silence, quietly flopping back down on the sofa once more to put on his sneakers.  

And that was Chris’s last straw, jeongin’s silence had sent him over the edge. “SO WHAT?? IM A LIAR NOW?.. AS  LONG AS WEVE BEEN BEST FRIENDS THIS IS HOW YOU ACT OVER A FUCKING GIRL THAT DOESNT EVEN DESERVE YOU TO BEGIN WITH!?” 

Jeongin kept his silence as he continued to take his time putting his shoes on almost as if he was ignoring Chris. 

“Well if that's what you think wait for minho and changbin to come back and ask them yourself, they were here for it was well!” 

“nah I'm good” jeongin put on a false nonchalant act.  

“so you don't believe any of us is what you're saying? Minho, bin, y/n, lix, and i are all just gonna lie on your girlfriend unprovoked??” 

“i just dont undertsand when we started ganging up on eachother instaed of talking shit out ??!” 

“IS THAT NOT WTF WERE TRYING TO DO RIGHT NOW??” chris barked back. 

“ yall BEEN holding hostility against sophie, you think im fucking dumb i peeped the energy shift a WHILE ago!!” 

“ thats because sophie is a fucking werido jeong!” you jumped in to defend chris once more “Shes been doing hella weird and shady shit for a long ass time, but for the sake of YOU we tried to keep the peace and keep it under wraps! I even distanced myself from her a while ago because shes been lying on me and acting hella phony. Youre like my little brother ofc i didnt want to bring it up and end up putting you into a predicament where you had to choose between her and your friends that would be fucking ridiculous ..” 

“You think i wanna be doing this right now?! Jeongin us having to have this conversation is hurting my fucking heart because you love so blindly!! you dont even realize what this girl is doing to you!” your passionate argument had turned into screaming at this point and you were afraid that the love you held for your best friend and the action of trying to protect him had gotten lost in translation.

“i dont realize what shes doing to me?? wtf is she even doing ?!!?” he barked back at you  clearly clueless and stubborn not even putting any effort to try and understand your point of view. 

“oh my... fucking goodness ..” felix let out a loud frustrated sigh as he slouched back into the sofa. He and chris both facepalming simultaneously as you just stood there looking at him like he had four heads.. 

“dude.. She basically cheated on you! She kissed me.. ANOTHER MAN!! That man being one of your best friends and your roommate...that's literally right under your nose!! so she clearly doesn't give a fuck about you, she didnt even have the decency to do it outside of your friend group, jeongin” at this point chris knew good and well that the only reason jeongin continued to argue back was because he was embarrassed and in denial. 

He stood quiet for a few seconds just upset and breathing heavy not really having much to say to continue defending sophie (because what is there even to defend DROP THAT HOE!) 

“so what, she just left after that happened?!” jeongin spoke again attempting to argue back 

“no... I tried to take her fucking head off because why would she ever do some grimey shit like that?! But these two wouldn't let me hit her so i kicked her outta my fucking house.” you spoke with annoyance.

“ that shit dont make no fucking sense why would she try to kiss chris when we’re literally dating and everyone that was in here knows that!!” he raised his voice again 

“bingo dipshit!” felix’s frustration had began turning into sassy side remarks  

“THAT RIGHT THERE IS OUR POINT EXACTLY!!” you screamed starting to feel like you were talking to a brick wall 

“not TRY might i add .. she DID kiss me. She quite literally grabbed my face and kissed me after i told her to stop.” chris added in a sarcastic tone, he was pissed that this conversation was even still going on. 

“call her.” felix chimed in but jeongin just glared in his direction not saying anything. 

“call her right now with all of us here and ask her why she got into it with y/n last night 

He went silent once more ignoring felix entirely before getting up from the sofa to go grab his jacket and keys. 

This silence was much thicker than each one previously, and it left loud feelings of frustration and utter disbelief lingering in the air.  

“jeong, you deadass?..” you spoke again, standing frozen. All the anger in your body wholly dissipating, being replaced with the hurt that was painfully evident in your voice as it trembled slightly. 

Realizing how badly he fucked up, jeongin once again chose to stay silent and avoid your gaze. 

“Denial is a fat bitch to swallow isn't it?” felix scoffed. 

“ Fuck off, felix!” jeongin bit back as he began walking towards the front door 

“right back at ya cunt!” felix barked in a harsh tone as he flipped him the bird 

“you're mad at the wrong people idk wtf else to tell you but if you wanna choose to be stupid for this fucking girl than have fun with the outcome!” chris dusted his hands with the situation and walked away as jeongin walked in the opposite direction, storming out of the apartment slamming the door behind him  

You stood there staring at the door almost stuck in a trance. There was nothing you wanted more than for him to come back through that door or for this to just be some bad dream  but it most definitely was not.   

Slowly turning around towards felix who was already slowly making his way towards you feeling the sadness in your aura. He gently grabbed your hand immediately rubbing his thumb over the back of your kunckles in an attempt to comfort you. Your watery eyes met his apologetic ones and he could feel everything you were feeling in the that moment. He was pissed because every single thing that you were scared of happening had just come true.  

“ lix.. Please tell me i did not just lose my best friend over this bitch..” your voice was almost a whisper with a barely audible sob leaving your mouth before you could even finish your sentence. The tears began to fall at a rapid pace and there wasnt much lix could even say to comfort you. “ i knew it... i knew this shit was gonna happen!” the tears kept flowing He felt so defeated, and the only thing he could do was the one thing he does best, and that was hold you. He held you on the sofa for hours. You had cried and cried, fell asleep, woke up and cried some. Minho and changbin had come back and immediately realized exactly what had happened. Chris filled them in on all the details of how ridiculous jeongin was being and of course they were just as heated as the rest of you were. The guys had all ended-up crashing in your guest bedroom before felix had woken up and carried you to your bed so that you could rest properly. It was definitely needed after so much emotional destress on top of you being awake for 24+ hours and all the partying and drinking that had happened right before all the drama.  

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[kentopedia]

i do not anticipate being on here much in november but just know i miss you all and i love you 🤍

[jrueships]

guess whos not going in at all this week, actually

[llycaons]

me and a beloved mewtual going LITERALLY and EXACTLYY to each other as we reaffirm a core part of the story being wwx's overall journey in his social dynamics to stability and security as he goes, not without tragedy and loss, but from a contentious and unsupportive main relationship in a hostile social setting that degenerates quickly into dysfunction and instability and violence to end up with a supportive and healthy and happy life partnership with someone whose main life goals involve taking care of him

[professionaljester]

[fadewalking]

Ok I have beef with Harding now, too.

[meme-loving-stuck]

"Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is the definition of-"

Actually, that kinda just sounds like existing and trying to communicate to other people.

Sometimes you have to ask someone multiple times to try to break their bad habit that also hurts you. Or, your family might be the kind to constantly harp on you over something that actually seriously eroded your self-image over time, and it will take more than one emotional breakdown for them to understand it's serious and they need to stop. Maybe your best friend looks at their phone more than they look at you whenever you hang out, and it's not a big deal to them until the third or fourth or tenth time you point it out to them.

And yeah, if you're in a seriously unhealthy relationship or you are unfortunate enough to be surrounded by people who dont care about your needs, you might HAVE to repeat yourself a lot. You might have to initiate that hard conversation about boundaries bi-monthly if your partner doesn't think it's a big deal. You might have to do it every week (again, this is not healthy)

So, yeah! If you are constantly having to repeat yourself, always the one to have to ask twice or three times, and you literally have to beg for your needs to be met, it CAN kinda feel like you're going insane!

But that's just how other people are sometimes. People are selfish. People forget about important things. Maybe, in the end, if you stay consistent, they'll listen.

[werewolf-apologist]

maybe i am being a huge bitch and terrible and unfair ????? perhaps that’s the problem ???? and that is likely. however the council (my two best friends and my mom) have concurred that i should actually be angrier and meaner so i think im doing my best atm

[urlocallesbiab]

sorry to everyone who's been missing me/waiting for something from me, i've been slipping in and out of depressive fog for a week or two (and in general have experienced significantly worse depression than normal for a couple years, but that’s another story)

i long to get back, too; a lot of things to read and ideas to write and people to talk to. love y'all, take care

[muttsona]

i am the poisoned blood running through my tired veins

[wingdingle]

ok i figured it out finally. the secret to becoming friends with somebody is to keep doing smalltalk and asking how peoples days are and listen to them and share your own experiences and be genuinely curious about theirs, until you find people who also want to be friends with you enough to talk to you outside of the setting you regularly meet in, and then just initiate communication on a regular basis (at least 5 times a week or some shit idk.) also assess their comfort zone before talking about like social taboos . like ask them if they are ok hearing smth youre unsure about before you say it. also you dont necessarily succeed every time but dont get discouraged theres always more ppl and more room to grow =]

sidenote: try to make sure that when you make conversation it isnt exclusively about things you feel negatively about and keep an open mind about peoples interests, even if you dont necessarily agree with them - some people dont know some tjings are offensive bc theyre just too busy living their lives to stay on top of everything, but you can always explain that thought about it being offensive, just dont shut them down right away... imagine how youd feel if someone shut you down when you were talking about something you liked

[okidenshi]

Sometimes i thinks bout how my gen x parents took doctors telling them that that the anti-depressants worked by heling 'balance chemicals' in my brain so that it helped me be more happy or whatever as like... these meds will ALTER MY ENTIRE PERSONALITY AND THEY DAUGHTER THEY LOVE MAY BE GOOONEEEE OOOO~~~"

Not that they're horribly anti-med really, but as a young teen they would always be like "but... what if the meds are changing you :((" like. girl. isn't that the goal here almost-

[sparring-spirals]

You know, my takeaway from Imogen in the last episode actually went a bit differently. She approaches Orym and Laudna about what they think of the whole thing almost as if she's asking permission to be uncertain. And the Hells try to reassure her, and confirm that they're doing what they have to, but no one ever actually asks how she's doing, how she feels about it (maybe they did and I missed it). It's one thing to do what you have to, but Imogen may be feeling a bit alone right now.

I mean, if it helps, that entire last post was specifically in reaction to the conversation directly after the encounter with Liliana- the tone of the interaction and conversations between then and the conversations at the end of the episode are, I think, drastically different.

That said, while I agree that Imogen is no doubt feeling burdens and choices weigh down for a whole host of reasons, and is probably feeling isolated in it- I don't think they're at a juncture where asking her how she's doing, or how she's feeling, more than they already have been- would help, or even be what Imogen is seeking out.

(I'm also not sure that, at a certain point. Its a fair thing to ask of them, especially given well. Ongoing events. Recent worries. I think they try, anyway- Laudna does explicitly ask- but there is so much weighing on them as well).

They have asked Imogen, how she's doing, as things got worse and worse and more personal, and generally gotten "No im. Fine." which I recall mostly because I've enjoyed making memes about BH going "hey are you ok" and Imogen, clearly Not great, going "Im FINE what why do you even ask whaaat". Within the conversation with Laudna itself! There's a "how are you feeling", and Imogen says "Good" and "You don't have to lie to me" then "No this is terrible" and a laugh because- the world is ending! the world is ending. none of them are fine. its all bad.

I think what both Laudna and Orym try to do in their conversations- try to reassure, meet her where she's at, answer her questions and offer their own support for whatever she chooses. Is its own form of kindness, that registers that uncertainty in her and tries to provide help for that, in particular. And I don't think Imogen is the kind of person to not be cognizant of that. It is a form of care, I think, and moreso when the world is ending, and everyone is their own version of wrecked and fighting through it, and there are no shortage of questions.

I think Imogen probably does feel a little alone, isolated, right now, and I also doubt that further inquiry into her mental state or her emotions would alleviate that particular sensation.

But seeing that doubt, that fear, that worry, and offering: My love and meaning has not been irreparably tainted by this, no. I'm not worried about you. Try not to beat yourself up. You have this choice. Its yours. Whatever you choose, I am with you.

It's not fixing everything, because I don't think anything can. but on the list of things to do, in situations like this- its not nothing. Far from it.

[fappellmoan]

famously i never say violent things on the hyperbolic bitching and moaning website but i seriously do think my broadcasting professor should kill herself violently in front of me so sorry girl. the only reason id retract that a little bit is to be like well u r a woman at a shitty university and she has been nice to me at points and been cool a couple times but idrc

[patchesjam]

i am not going to continue arguing with you all nap time zzz zzz

[tamaharu]

why is talking to parents about mental health stuff so nerve wracking like im just informing them that im planning to get an adhd assessment so they could help with insurance and im like oh man i should be shot for this