#im kidding LMAO jokes are how i cope

[ditzydoll111]

LMAOO me and my gf broke up. what even do i do gay ppl on my phone,, pls save me.

[welcometoteyvat]

read baizhu’s stories. he wins for most balanced character of all time

[doromoni]

Not Over the Papaya | OP81

⊹ ｡•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

Ships : Oscar Piastri x Popstar! Reader , Ex!Lando Norris x Popstar! Reader

Genre : Fluff Smau

A/N : Let the silly season begin againn~

Face claim : Jennie Kim

Summary : Y/N and Oscar cope with their own breakups by making the Heartbreak Club.

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

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mclaren

liked by landonorris, zakbrown, Ln4 and others

tagged @/landonorris and @/zakbrown

mclaren What a night with the Mclaren Family! To a successful first half of the season 🎉

landonorris Now that’s how a team celebrates!

mclaren y’know it DJ!

user1 Mclaren is showing the grid the best driver pair 💪

user2 Oscar is monstrous even just on his 2nd year 😮‍💨

user3 where is Oscar??!! he's not in any of these pics

user4 you are so right! why are they celebrating without Oscar??

user5 Oscar’s in Aus with the other drivers and Y/N

user6 Dude Oscar should really try to fit in with the team better

user7 Ik… dude is not making himself look good by skipping team gatherings

user8 jumping into conclusions there bud

user7 Am I tho? What? like mclaren threw a party without telling Oscar?? their own driver??

user8 I wouldn’t move past it them … Ehem what ever happened with Danny Ric? yeah exactly

user9 Bro Piastri really chose to be with other drivers than show support to the team who gave him a seat and a job 🤡

user10 Dude just won a race and decided he’s above everyone else

user11 Oscar is starting to piss me off. He should be supporting Lando and the team inside and outside the track. He’s just plain selfish

user12 why is everyone suddenly going ham on Oscar’s absence??? So what if he missed a team party? do y’all expect him to fly across half the world to kiss ass. Y’all need better things to do.

user13 Nah dude, I love Osc but they do have a point. He should show some appreciation the team who gave him a car.

*Incoming call from Mavy (Mclaren PR)

Pick up or Decline

Decline

*Incoming call from Mavy (Mclaren PR)

Pick up or Decline

Decline

*Incoming call from Mavy ( Mclaren PR)

Pick up or Decline

Decline

*Turn on Do not Disturb?

* Do not Disturb is enabled

f1news

f1news Is the entire grid in Australia??? Look at all of them in suits 😮‍💨 As it turns out Oscar’s “party” tweet was not a joke at all!

User1 Wow just what did Oscar do to make them all come??

User2 Is that lewis?? wait is that SEB VETTEL?!!

user3 IK im freaking out too!!

user4 Ohoho I smell dramaaaa

user5 Hmm no Lando?? or Zak?? or any papaya??

user6 Well John, Osc’s engineer is there

user5 ok fine one papaya

user6 What tf is going on??? Luv to see it tho

user7 Not oscar turning the tables at McLaren.

user8 He’s so unhinged! Honestly only he can pull something so crazy as this.

user9 i heard other people are attending not just drivers.

user10 yeah i heard that too! apparently its turning into smth quite big and other singers and celebs are attending

user11 lmao thank Y/N’s influence

Y/N. 5m

story replies

oscarpiastri Can’t wait to see you on stage

Y/N. Well you do like bragging that I’m yours

oscarpiastri guilty as charged, baby. They can look but at the end of the day you are mine

Y/N. mhm all yours Luv.

oscarpiastri Thank you for doing this my dear… i know it was sudden for me to ask you to perform

Y/N. are you kidding?? I’m so down to help you Baby. Show them youre no push over!

oscarpiastri Y’know i could get fired for this right

Y/N. Well~ i could earn for the both us luv. 😉

oscarpiastri harharhar . ily you gremlin

Y/N. Ily more! I’ll stay by you through everything. thats a promise.

oscarpiastri

liked by Y/N., charles_leclerc, lewishamilton, sebastianvettel, and others

oscarpiastri No. This is how you celebrate.

comments are disabled

*incoming call from Zak Brown

Pick up or Decline

Series Taglist : @champagneproblems17 @itsjustfranzi @cheriwritesig @forza-charles @awritingtree @sltwins @gr1mes-cc @hwalllllllelujah @btsfluffsworld @tillyt04 @landotd @booksandflowrs @czennieszn @thatsouthernblondewiththeass @tellybearryyyy @wobblymug @alittlechaotics-blog @bingussthirdtoe @mirrorball-6 @demandealalune @heartsforleclerc @yoongi-holland @maneskin-slave @alenix @forensicheart @bloodyymaryyy @stereading @hahahjej @youre-on-your-ownkid : closed

Maintaglist : @myescapefromthislife @peterholland04 @charlottef1 @fangirl125reader @mel164 @gnarlycore @chloelovesln4 @vickykazuya @merchelsea @ln4author @qzmef @nxk1309 @styl1shl1v @lottalove4evelyn @gr3yhues : closed for now

[cryingisnecessaryfanfics]

PART TWO

Its 2am have more scar headcannons/imagines

Characters: Razor(platonic), Kaeya, Xiao, Tighnari

Sorry these are probs subpar cuz my writing style varies depending on the bpd mood lmao. Bear with the redundancy of these, there are only so many ways to write the same action.

If youre the anon who sent me an ask im replying to your ask with the inverse you talked about. Stay tuned <3 (its probably gonna take another 6 months but welp)

Not spell checked or proof read sorry lol

Razor (platonic)

Wolf boy has a lot of scars as we can all tell. I feel like he probably doesnt get the point of lotion. Probably says it smells bad, like chemicals. His scars are all really improperly healed. Probably has keloid scars (overproduction of scar tissue). The sheer size of the ones on his arms lead me to believe he never got stitches or bandages of any sort, which makes sense considering his story. Regardless, that shit looks painful lmao. (Lighthearted imagine to start us off)

“Razor!” You yell, damn that kid was way faster than you. You nearly trip over a log as you run after him.

“Razor, stop running dammit.” You continue to shout after him, hoping anything you say might just make him slow down. Lord knows you could never catch up to him.

“It's just lotion. It'll make you feel better!” Your lungs start to sting from the chase and your legs drag behind you. You stop to catch your breath and Razor slows down in front of you.

He approaches you slowly like he's afraid you’ll catch him if he gets too close. “Smells bad,” he says and you all but roll your eyes.

“Sometimes things that are good for us smell bad.” You explain. Razor waits for your breathing to even out before he gets within arms reach of you.

“Like soap?” He says and you laugh at the memory of trying to get him to wash himself with soap instead of the occasional dip in the river.

“Yes, like soap.” You sigh and he frowns. Tentatively he holds out his arm, he looks at you expectantly.

“Finally.” You say under your breath and open the bottle of lotion. You can practically feel Razor's eyes watch your hands cautiously. He doesn't move as you spread some against the skin of his arm.

“Cold.” He comments and you huff a little laugh.

“See.” You say when you finish. “Feels better right?”

Razor finally relaxes and smiles at you. “Yes.”

You're just glad he stopped running.

Kaeya

Not gonna go the obvious way and say his eyepatch because I'm different lmao. I think his knuckles are scarred. I think kaeya seems like the type to cope with his feelings through violence. I think kaeya probably hates himself. When everything gets to be too much he just starts coming out swinging. The kind of person who punches a wall without really thinking about it. But yeah I think he used his fists too much when he was younger and now he wears the fingerless gloves to protect/cover the scars. (Sorry if this is weird or seems ooc, it just makes sense to me idk why)

You first see them when he gets the new outfit in sumeru. Everyone around you seems to disregard them, or maybe just not notice. But you can sense the way he subtly hides the scars, the way he walks with a hand behind his back, one covering the other. Its easy to not notice if you arent always watching closely. Maybe the only reason you noticed was because you seemed to always be staring at him. Kaeya catches you looking more than once and in typical kaeya fashion he deflects with flirting or jokes.

Later, when youve returned home to mondstat you ask him about it and he explains after some persistence.

“Its nothing to be shameful of.” You murmur, a hand holding his, looking at the dry scar tissue.

“Its one thing to have scars from braving a battle, a complete other thing to have them from your own stupidity.” He looks away from you and the eye you can see seems far away. Like he’s recalling something from his past.

“But it wasnt stupid, it was a way to cope. How can anyone think of something like that as not brave?” He doesnt answer you, only frowns slightly, a face youve never seen him make. “Do you atleast take care of them?”

He still doesnt respond. You sigh, exasperated, and pull out your endless bag of goods to find a lotion to help with the dryness.

“What are you doing?” He asks, and you all but cringe at the thought of him not knowing you have to moisturize scars.

“I’m helping you.” You half expect him to make a witty comment but the situation proves to be too heavy and he goes back to staying silent. The whole act goes without words, you spread the lotion over his knuckles, rub it in gently. He doesnt say anything until you slide his gloves back on.

“Thank you.” He says and before you can say anything back he adds, “For your actions and your words.”

You press a kiss to one of his gloved hands. “Your welcome.” You thnk you see his cheeks tint the slightest shade of red before hes back to normal again.

“And here I thought I was the romantic.”

Xiao

I always liked the images of the karmic binds/shackles so I like to imagine his wrists are scarred from straining(?) those too much. I mean considering Xiao is an Adeptus physical wounds wouldn't leave a scar so maybe these more mental-type wounds would. Like the more karmic debt he has the worse the scars get in condition, the less debt the more they fade. Maybe the lotion helps soothe the debt more than anything. Maybe the act of something so comforting and intimate with you lessens the pain. Food for thought I guess.

Every morning, at dawn, Xiao enters a room in Wangshu Inn so his lover can put lotion on his scars. This morning is no different.

“Good morning, Xiao.” You say like always, same pretty smile on your face every day.

“Morning,” Xiao mumbles and frowns as if this isn't his favorite part of the day. He avoids your eyes as he takes off his gloves. As many times as youve seen his wrists, he still gets insecure about them. It's no secret Xiao hates being vulnerable, even around his most trusted companion.

“I saw zhongli yesterday.” You say quietly as he sits down on the bed next to you, lotion in hand. “He was with that harbinger.”

“Tch. Useless scum.” Xiao comments and you laugh.

“He seemed happy, Xiao. Try to be tolerant of his friend.” Xiao just rolls his eyes and rests his arm in your hand. You continue to talk about your day as you open the bottle of lotion and start to spread it out against his wrist.

Xiao stays quiet during this, as he always does. You think he must enjoy your voice because he's always been intent on listening to you speak even if he usually prefers silence. He absorbs your words so soaked in affection and the ache in his body seems to lessen. Pain becomes distant, horrible and intense feelings become easier to push away.

It's over before he realizes it, you've put the lotion away simply holding his hand now, savoring the feeling of his skin against yours. He leans against you and you hum in content.

Maybe this is healing for the both of you. Mutual comfort.

Tighnari

I know a lot of people like the idea of him having scars from getting struck by lightning so i'm just gonna play off of that. Lighting very rarely leaves scars but the scars it does leave are burns. The electricity also causes nerve damage so you'd have to be very gentle and careful when handling tighnari’s scars. They're probably on his neck/back so itd take a lot of trust for him to let you see him so vulnerable. He probably already has lotion he puts on himself but its very hard to reach your own back so eventually he asks you for help.

You've seen him put lotion on his scars many times, watched him wince at the pain of it. You refrain from asking him if he wants your help. Tighnari is independent, he doesn't need anyone's help. But maybe itd be less painful if he didn't have to strain his muscles to reach the scars.

He doesn't say much when he asks the first time. Just tells you to be careful. He starts to list the ingredients of the lotion he's made. How he found it, what the weather was like that day.

No matter how gentle you were he’d still pause in the middle of sentences, and with his back to you, you never saw his winces but you knew they were there.

“Okay,” you say when you've finished and you know he's relieved it's over even if it was a more pleasant experience than him doing it himself.

But he thanks you anyway, and he’ll ask you to do it again the next day.

[thesweetnessofspring]

i have a few Everlark Post-MJ head canons that I’d like to share!

Katniss and Peeta get to finally act like the normal kids/teenagers they never got to be? Small things like playing out in the rain, reading a bunch of books that were once banned by the Capitol, dancing to music in their living room, and getting into mundane hobbies not part of their typical persona (like I can see Katniss taking up some knitting or crocheting? maybe Peeta could take a hand at carpentry, building small things like birdhouses and chairs)

Once they’re more stable physically and mentally, they add work-out regimes in their daily routines. Peeta, being an athlete in canon, starts to lift weights again and maybe take a few runs around the district once in awhile? He comes back to 12 probably still a lot skinner compared to when he was training for the quell? But he gets all the muscle back in no time, much to Katniss’ appraisal 😉 speaking of Katniss, she’s naturally active in the woods with climbing trees and all that but I do believe she too takes a few runs once im awhile, sometimes with Peeta ☺️

Okay this one is my fave but they love to mess with Haymitch because now that their lives aren’t at risk, him getting pissed at them is just plain hilarious. I can imagine Peeta pulling small pranks on him (as a normal teenage boy does) like doodling on the sides of the newspaper before Haymitch gets to read it at breakfast. When he gets Katniss roped into the pranks tho, they truly become a menace. Drawing on Haymitch’s face while he naps and him not noticing till he strolls into town and someone points it out, they super glue his coffee mug to the table, purposely showing a lot of PDA while he eats because they know it disgusts him, filling his flask with odd (but consumable) liquids 🥲 though, Haymitch also gets his revenge sometimes like by timing the exact moment he knows they’re about to ~get busy~ so he walks in and casually makes conversation while they stare at him in irritation, or stealing Peeta’s freshly baked loaves from the counter when he leaves the kitchen for a bit 😭 also, making a lot of dirty jokes and innuendos to Katniss once he noticed she and Peeta are becoming a lot closer because he knows it pisses her off

Omg I’m so sorry for the long post but I have so many HCs for them! I hope you don’t mind me sending them once in awhile since idk where to really put them lmao

❤️, headcanon-anony

headcanon-anony, I'm honored you would think to send these to me! I love all of these! Especially about how Katniss, Peeta, and Haymitch find little ways to tease and prank each other. Such a found family thing to do and a light way to cope with their trauma through laughter. And Katniss and Peeta taking time to be kids again?! Love it! I think later when they have kids, getting to experience the joys of childhood through them is also very healing and meaningful for them.

[damnedrainbows]

not doing good, bad day for autism. rant below of an autistic woman who’s made this iteration of a rant probsbly far too many times

you know I often advocate for myself and my community, get pissed when I hear shit like ‘curing autism’, embracing my own autism, but most of the time I realize if someone offered me a cure I’d take it. And I don’t even care that that would erase who I am as a person because I’ve come to find out that so much of me is because of my autism, maybe it’s the lesser of two evils

because maybe earlier if I recognized things better maybe I would have seen my brother was getting distressed when we were playing around and he said to stop. thing is the kid does that all the time, playfully saying stop and then getting annoyed when you listen cause he was joking. But no, he was actually upset and according to my family “I should have recognized the tone was different”

maybe when my gf started venting I would have acknowledged that they were just looking to vent and weren’t wanting my rigid solutions

and maybe I could still stare at my art without my eyes feeling like it’ll catch fire because I can’t…look at light that long anymore!

you know I make all these jokes and post funny things with me and gb where I say things without thinking it through and it can be hilarious, but most of the time it’s just. GUTTING. a reminder that no matter how much I”ve studied human behavior since childhood to avoid shit like this, it’ll just keep happening, and it’s not as endearing as I wish it could be, because people just get sick of it

I know I’ve probably bored my friends to tears with the different but same plot of ‘character learning they’re autistic’ because I do that plot so much or something related to autism because it’s my cope lmao I get to act out how I wish most people treated me, I get to resolve trauma with character that were mistreat3d because of it. it’s a plot that I’ll never get tired of doing because I need it

and then on top of everything, my tablet pen, one that is no longer made because they don’t make my tablet anymore, is GONE. I don’t know where, I just had it. And I mean, JUST had it. I’ve been drawing with it all day. I set it down, I don’t know where, and it’s gone!

and all this when I’m already nervous as fuck for my hair appointment tomorrow. you want to know why? scared of the hair dryer. what kind of pathetic pussy…cries at having their hair dried? I never liked grooming growing up, and itks why I never brush my hair, but who the fuck cries at a hair dryer, I haven’t had my hair dried by one of those since my sensitivity worsened. I don’t want to imagine the hell. and of course the appointment is made in the evening as her last client because I can’t be trusted to you know be normal

AND THEN I GET REPRIMANDED FOR NOT HELPING WITH THE FUCKING TV REMOTE THATS BROKEN WHEN IM HAVING A MELT DOWN “could you not sit down with me and show me for a few minutes?” NO I CANT BECAUSE I JUST SPENT THEPAST FIFTEEN MINUTES SLAMMING MY HEAD IN THE SHOWER

im not good it’s just not good. i want my fucking tablet pen i want to be normal. i want to…i cant even say what i want to do without having people worried for my safety. i just.

i can’t deal with being me much longer

[gay-dorito-dust]

But that's why it's so fun though. There's definitely the surface level canon story.

It's fun to think, what if? Especially with easter eggs or vague elements showing the tiniest connection to another. Someone had to create that, so maybe they had an idea the viewer would too. If so, then what would the story look like if this connection is canon. Bonus points if it is canon and theres tiny nuggets all over the place. Im looking at you, eldren ring 😘👅. Overall, it expands the story and adds depth, and who doesn't like that. (Trick question: NO ONE)

Lmao YOU KNOW he was waiting!! The pan away shot was so the audience couldn't see the filthy smirk on his face after saying that. Leon is totally a "fun guy" at heart *snaps finger guns*. Definitely loves to crack jokes. It's just given his surroundings and the situation he usually in, it's totally not called for. Especially his type of...humor, which already isn't that funny in a normal environment. Then when he says it, it's a double "Oh hell no." for me, dawg.

AHHHHH lmaooo you like his jokes! You're more whipped me than! 🤣 I'm shriveling up. A chocolate eclair 💀 we gotta build that up! (I can't talk mine is as tough as extra firm tofu)

Fr I totally understand. I'd feel bad especially since he's trying to lighten the environment, plus I know he hates this more than I do. Replace me with Ashley and all I hear are gunshots, goreish noises, and foreign yelling 24/7...👁👄👁 I'm listening to "Leon's jokes on a 10 hour loop" (some of them). I'd have to scrape up the courage to think of jokes and not hyper fixating on my environment and future death or Leon's back 😉.

I'd either beg Leon for a mercy kill or do it myself. I'm not built for that world. Also if Leon actually said that, he'd get 1 good noodle star, cuz that actually made me laugh.🤡

I'm hollering!! I was thinking the same thing but couldn't find the meme!!! Thank you!!🥹

Leon is a frat party and a Bang energy drink (the only option) with a plate of hooters wings away from being the "you're not that guy pal". Maybe the trauma was worth it.

(Again sorry for any grammar mistake. I can't read or write)

I love a game with little nuggets that subtly connect to one another to weave an story beneath the common storyline. It just gives you more insight to…well everything! It’s one of my favourites that the game developers are like ‘we’re gonna give long time players a treat and new time players a fun thing to unravel.’

Ngl, Leon would single-handedly give me brain rot so bad that I start doing crappy, half asses one liners.

It’s a disease and he’s the cause.

It ain’t my fault that Leon is so unbelievably pretty! My kryptonite is pretty boys and unfortunately Leon is on-top of the list for prettiest boys!

All he’d have to do if flash me a smile and I’d be like; 😩 😳😖🥵🤤🫠

The trauma Leon has been through had altered him so much so that his coping mechanisms are to make shitty one liners to EVERYTHING.

He thinks he’s a cool kid at heart, we know that ain’t true. He’s a dorky dork that thinks his humour is the shit.

Me: Leon go to therapy, you’re obviously not okay.

Leon: Therapy is for losers and I am no loser😎

Me: you’ve missed 6 appointments, the jokes got to stop-

In all fairness he probs doesn’t think therapy would work out for him at all and also over works himself to the bone. I remember someone saying that the reasons for Leon being jacked as all hell in re4 is so he doesn’t get taken by surprise anymore.

My baby needs a hug but he’d probably be so on edge and alert that I wouldn’t be able to without triggering his fight or flight responses.

I’d get too distracted by Leon’s ass and have a deep debate within myself whether or not it’s be inappropriate to slap it. Also Leon doesn’t skip leg day. He’s got nice thighs, and arms…and back…nice tits…

Leon probably would drink bang energy in means of staying up at night. How he finds out about bang is anyones guess.

[robotsrawesome64]

Heyyyy saw you would like some COD matchups

I'm American, but my mother's side is Slavic. I'm white, 5'6, shoulder length brown hair. I wear glasses and have a coquette aesthetic. I'm not skinny but I'm not plus sized so idk what to call myself lol.

I'm quiet and come off and kinda weird when you don't know me (I have under developed social skills due to C-PTSD). I stay to myself, make jokes that don't even seem connected to the current interactions, have a hard time maintaining eye contact. I love space and art, I have ADHD, Bipolar, and C-PTSD. I'm extremely loyal, can see right through people's bullshit, and am extremely understanding of people's unconventional habits. When you get to know me, I'm more chaotic. Not in an "I'm so random🤪😎" way but "I have an idea, I've thought it 70% of the way through, and we will see how it goes together"

If I were in the COD universe I'd probably be a sniper. I know that's a basic answer but my reasons are due to my hypervigilence, good eye tracking, great at shooting (shoutout to Thanksgiving traditions), and preferance for overall quiet and strict environments.

My top 5 characters are Simon Riley, Nikto, Gaz, Konig (Canon, not fanon), and Krueger.

Feel free to ignore, ik that writing can be really draining!! <3

I matched you with....

KU-KU-KUH KRUUUEGER 📣📢♨️❗❓����💯🆘

^graphic design is my passion

TYSM for the first ask :,,DD So I got carried away, gonna see if ur into it but if not give me a shout to remove any of the warning stuff/private it etc !! (this is on me lmao) dont wanna scare you off w warnings, its overall fluff but i gotta tag em correctly

W: bbgifying fictional war criminals, violence/murder(described Krueger kills hostiles, implication you have), intimidation(Krueger likes killing/is ego aggressive to hostiles/brief aggro jealousy to others), ally very wounded (brief, blood mention, theyll be ok offscreen dw), unexpected gunshot on the range(all g, it was an ally), stalker-y (lately announced presence, lies that the public german nickname 4u he uses isnt affectionate, pre-dating jealousy), vague bad mental health mention, getting triggered mention, unspecified negativeish Krueger coping mechanism, vigilance(nothing happens but ur partners wanted/tense mission), you guys shooting, long mandated proximity, brief 'is bad man?', worry, long read more, light cliffhanger + HC that you were assigned callsign 'Cere'!

(This is a delulu long 2 off, next inbox ask i get to im gonna chill & try bulletpoints instead :p)(req are closed rite now TYSM for them&lt;3 !)

===============================================🌙

"You're assigned with Krueger? Oh, buddy." Your fellow KorTac operator eyes you with sympathy.

It was the equivalent of a teacher seating the 'troubled' kid next to the 'good, quiet' kid.

Flash back to pre-assignment: as soon as you met him you didn't need to look into any files to know he was a two-faced bitch. He was pretty socially inconspicuous if not for your watchful eye. Low-effort charisma, flattery, egotisical swagger. Heedless apathy if someone that wasn't helping him needed help. All the calm confidence in the world and he's always at least hiding some part of his face. So suspicious for a dude whose job is murder.

Krueger was 'friendly', but he wasn't the type to get invested in getting to know 'the team'. Meaning, once a blue moon when you both decide to stay in a social space together, the max of your interaction is him staring from across the room and snorting at you. A joke of yours had fell on someone's deaf ears and a solid 4 seconds later he chuckled at it. Or at you. Unclear. You'd felt his blatant gaze burning you through the hood as soon as you'd started talking. Anyway, now you both looked "weird".

Maybe it was a sniper thing? You couldn't afford to get rusty as you settled on the faction base's range; one eye closed to focus down the scope. That familar 'pchow' sound: hit. Cock, reload, hit, repeat. Hit. Hit-hit, wait what? What was supposed to be your target dents in front of you as you hear the same sound, but from along the range. Jesus christ. Someone else was practicing too. You still yourself and resume through their tampering/co-shooting. Once you've had your fill Krueger conveniently had too, revealing himself as your competitor to purr a praise at you as you passed by. "Very nice."

Anyway, that mission you two were sent on. Heavy snow, low hills and wind-swept shrubland before forest. Hostile base right in the middle in which you've been ordered to clear by any means. There was no way they'd be able to send in a team yet without getting spotted, which is where you guys came in. A sniper either side. Hit your shots; everything will be okay. Miss? There's only so many places it could've come from.

There was something beautiful in that moment in the calm before the storm. Only the crunch of snow as you settled into position, impossibly small as you painted the final dot in the break of snow back to white. Above you, an even wider sprawling landscape of almost clear blue sky with a few sparse strings of cloud. You could see the faint impression of the moon. And…another planet? Something smaller, stationary, glinting. It was possible to catch planets during the daytime, sure, but you might know that this wasn't their usual positions. You think you've just witnessed something very special.

Married to that sight was the chill of wind over your many layers, and Krueger muttering eerily calm communications in your ear via radio. It's not like sniper fire could be silent, but you had a window of opportunity with the suppressor temporarily hiding your position. You'd shoot together.

He slowly counted down like he enjoyed it. Regardless of his distracting yapping you both hit, and he shamelessly hissed praise as he eagerly loaded his next.

Cut to your report back, your half-smile fades at a joke that didn't land with your befuddled superior. Krueger snickers. This was a long-range mission. Somehow, you were standing to attention in front of them, half your sniper hood burnt up (??) and Krueger standing a little more lax next to you splattered in blood. Now- you had clutched the mission. Thanks to your half-plan in response to Krueger getting ahead of himself, in which upon your very stressed communication you both went all-in on.

You remember a moment in the scuffle in which you were pinned by the last hostile after rescuing a screaming damsel Krueger (you didn't know he hit that pitch). You half expected the knife stuck through your attackers neck to pierce you too, before Krueger threaded the needle and double-neutralized your attacker with a snap of the neck. Panting, he leant out a hand for you to take, with a tilt of his head. "Thank you, bruder." You'd worked surprisingly natural together come the highest pressure. He didn't want to die, and you wouldn't let him. But God, he gave you a headache.

To your dismay/morbid interest you were assigned as a duo together again. And again. And again. Through trial and error you got more and more used to how each-other worked on the field, to the point his more bloodlust-y spontaneous ventures seemed quite tempting. With the guidance of your planning, of course. You swear you could hear him smirk on the other side of the radio when you finally seemed just as enthusiastic as him. Others joining you on your assignments would have to scramble to keep up with the pace of your symbiosis.

When he wasn't screaming and shouting for his life from the consequences of his own actions/in combat/violently taunting his enemies with concerning egotistical aggression, it was quite peaceful. Something about being able to focus together, but apart. Beautiful landscapes to the sound of his soothing dry tone.

And so, sue you if you hung out a little more.

"Come; you're needed." He'd half-joke with a pat on your back if he saw you alone, inviting you to sit with him and Nikto. The life-or-death nature of your field didn't really breed cliques, it's just when you could pick, two other 'offputting' neurodivergents were much less exhausting (once you'd mostly figured they weren't planning to kill you). Sometimes Krueger would be trying to say something and both you and Nikto would lose focus and have a lighter episode at the same time, which could be funnily validating despite the circumstances.

Nikto's threateningly gruff, jovial energy was kind of infectious. It might just come up in conversation: your mother's heritage. Ooh, Russian? Was it Russian? Do you know a second language? Krueger participated in the conversation, but…fuck, why were you looking at Nikto like that? No, no, you should just learn German with him instead. You'll have enough time for it together when you travel for your next mission.

It was very few and far between where Krueger had given anyone a nickname. Acquaintance German speakers would give him weird looks when he called you 'asterisks/little star'- "Sternchen," with a lingering tone. He'd non-chalantly play it off when you asked, oh you know, explaining it meant star, like the callsign you got assigned. You might explain, oh no, 'Cere' is a dwarf planet.

"Oh, really?" He seemed very interested as your eyes lit up into conversation about something you seemed to like.

Upon your explanation, he thinks your callsign suited you very well. Cere: an exceptional astronomical body usually hidden to the human eye. The largest object in an asteroid belt in-between Mars and Jupiter; muddy and icy; sporting brines, carbonates and stunningly shiny cryovolcanoes. Incredibly underrated for a beautiful busy planet that screams potential life.

He still called you sternchen, ft. "Mein sternchen," that one time. He was aiming for a cutesy secret term of endearment, but 'asterisks' technically worked too. You were his 'yes, and'. Shit, was he really thinking like that? I mean, he wasn't totally shy to it. It's just most of his previous attractions were short-term and pretty baseless for a reason. Especially with co-workers that actually had an allegiance to who they were working for.

Which made it all the more natural for him to unblinkingly step over and in the pool of blood of the person you were both tasked to protect when he saw you go down. He shouted scolding concern as he rushed to help you out even though you weren't even half as hurt.

Or when you felt shit, to say the least. You were stationed together in Berlin for an unpredictably long wait for a high-priority target. A safehouse in the middle of plain sight with you guys on deck. Blend in as civillians, barely working, just…waiting to be called on. It felt like leave, except you were living with Krueger.

It was definitely a little stressful for him to be back in Germany. He didn't intially realize his unconscious unconventional coping mechanisms set you off too, until he did, and he was at your side if you ever needed something. Helping you wasn't a big deal as far as he was concerned; he didn't have the capacity for afflictive empathy to get particularly tired of it. He'd stare at you with a limited calculative look as he tried to think of what might make his (..work)partner a little better.

Oh, staring? It was a natural habit of his to unabashedly look right in the eyes of people he considered safe/close. Just outside he tried to keep his anonymity, but here he offered to also hide his face or something indoors whilst he checked himself for that habit. Wouldn't be anything new.

Neither was finding the right words to avoid misconception/upset; casually, calmly squashing any worries.

Or when he kept bouncing his leg after being in too long when he sat, and you met eyes whilst fidgeting yourself. Yeah, no-one needed to say it to know it was time to go out.

Just two solid, fit foreigners with inconsistent tan lines. Yeah, no pressure. Played it off as his American other-half visiting for the summer holiday, or something. Not that he at all minded. An older couple observing you when he used his nickname for you (it..just meant star, right?); when he put his hand on your back to guide you somewhere less dodgy; or when you both stood close like you liked him to inconspicuously mutter information. In one of those moments you thought he might be a bit too much of a natural at this.

But you couldn't exactly leave each-other; he spared the details but let you know the faces to look for. And when his description trailed off, he tried drawing instead. Uh, yeah, no offence, but you couldn't tell what that was. You tried instead for him, kind of like a police sketch artist. Regardless of whether you drew often or not, he'd walk a little closer in interest, hand on the back of your seat to look over your shoulder with an impressed noise. "You made them too handsome, sternchen. That-oh yeah, much better." He'd joke.

Art was a pretty good way to fill the time. Alongside Krueger teaching you a little German to apply it later- maybe at a till. If you wanted to buy paints or something, go crazy. Company money, right? Fashion was fun, too. Unsure if you'd ever get the opportunity again to have packed nice-nice clothes for a job. Unlike him; he was underdressed compared to you. Sometimes literally.

Whenever the sunlight beamed in through your little window at the right time of day, he'd lay in it like a cat, sleeveless/ shirtless if you were comfortable. Men. Which was of note since he couldn't exactly flash them outside, but aside from the few scars (a couple of which you remember how he got them.) he had some cool (..?) tattoos. Shame he couldn't get one from you. Not that he'd back out if you busted out the ol' stick and poke. But hey, plenty of empty space left for illustratory practice to bide the time?

Time seemed to go quicker. Krueger singing under his breath around the small flat-thing as he tried to occupy himself; laying next to you on the floor when you felt bad; routine window sunbathing; eagerly crafting an elaborate game with you via worryingly stacked things from around the place just to take aggressive turns with each-other making it break everywhere and fall. It was the human equivalent of two ping pong balls in a box. His stories being your podcast as you did art; him sitting still-ish for you and being amused by the cute bow he'd been awarded to his bicep (not that he could compare to your style); loosely giving his hands back to you behind his head so you could fidget with or hold them, whatever you want.

If you liked him back? He confidently didn't think it was just an act of care anymore from the way your gaze lingered on him- which he reciprocated. He'd speak back calmly and try to hide the twitch of a smile with a satisfied tilt back of his head.

He'd hold you like he would've done anyway if you needed him, with the added flair of lulling his head to rest against next to yours as he calmly talked your ear off before bed. Maybe as he lightly traced your cheek where his hand laid, if he felt braver.

Your shared enemies always seemed to go down harder, more violently. Other operators caught snarky comments.

You weren't quite sure how it'd all come to an official head, or not. But as far as you were concerned, with your head on his shoulder, it wasn't too bad to be assigned with Sebastian Krueger.

[bisluthq]

As someone who has been in the fandom since debut, I think the focus on her wealth is because for a long time she was a joke - she was a teenager so not taken seriously, she wasn’t ‘country’ enough, then it was the joke of her being a man eater… she was mocked but so were her fans in a way that was reserved for boy band obsessions of ‘oh those silly little girls’ BUT the numbers never lied. She outsold all her fellow nominees in CDs and tickets and radio play. She was winning BMI awards for songwriting and being praised by big artists and now icons (all the lists of ‘what famous people said about Taylor’ - it used to be her contemporaries or just the generation above her, but if Ari said she loved Taylor it would be meaningless because Stevie nicks and sir Paul have praised her extensively yk, so her fellow current highly successful pop star who debuted as a recording artist after Taylor just doesn’t count anymore?

Anyway, Taylor’s success is a validation of her fans who were bullied for being a fan of her at school and by the media. So it’s vindicating for people who still hold those wounds… and if we go deeper, which I feel like you will get at least what I’m going to try to articulate - taylor is a symbol for a lot of people, so she was the coping mechanism through their parents divorce and when people mock Taylor, they feel like it’s their parents divorce that is being mocked. Or if one of the 50 things they were picked on for was liking Taylor, it’s easier to focus on Taylor when she’s still in their lives compared to thinking about when they had no one to sit with at lunch and they were teased for their nose/ eyes/ eyebrows/ clothes/ hair/ whatever cause people are mean.

I’m not trying to add to the pile on that is lobbed at the fandom, but there is a sense of arrested development on some big blogs/ stan accounts. I’ve been dealing with this issue myself because I want a do over of the last 15 years lmao so I DO NOT want to grow up and DO NOT want to have to “act my age” and why has nothing worked out like I thought it would and why is everything so expensive and people are still mean and judgemental and this was meant to end in high school and wasn’t I meant to have spent a few months in Europe by now like other people made look so normal?!?!?! 😭😭😭😭 But I’m learning how to just not be a rigid adult without being a Disney adult lmao. And I think adults in general need to learn how to have fun and be carefree without needing to be reckless again, which was part of what eras was (and most Taylor concerts are tbh) because people dress up and laugh and don’t take themselves seriously - and others think it’s fun instead of mocking you!! but they pull out all the glitter and sequins for one night and then go back to “normal” which for a lot of people isn’t apparently very fun or exciting.

I went in a lot of circles, but I do think there’s a lot of overlap. I used to take attacks on Taylor personally, sometimes it was like ‘22 year old is boring and stale and reads in her ugly antique chair like a loser’ and im like ‘but i like that chair? And reading? Am i a loser? 😢Fuck you she outsold your fav!! 🤬Therefore she is better and you know nothing, therefore I am better than you too! 😅’

It’s a weird copium. Also, this could be weird projection because I’ve been very unwell and spent a lot of therapy talking around the issues and that included saying ‘people are being mean to Taylor Swift and it feels like it’s happening to me’ (because it was easier to talk about my feelings through her, like when kids reenact their home life with dolls and drawings) than it was for me to open up about myself until I felt safe and comfortable enough with that therapist. I’m still unwell lol but I’m getting there!

Sorry I wrote so much, I’m very tired and cbf to read it before I send it now 😂😂😂 but I hope it was worth the read for you lol and I hope I made some sense. I find fandoms, particularly this one, such an interesting anthropological phenomenon (would have loved to study anthropology but also want a degree with job opportunities lol)

I get that - fandoms are very anthropologically interesting to me too lol and the things that we use for coping with life are also very interesting to me lol and the things that we hold onto or dear to us (so Taylor or whatever other shit we hold onto). And I know what you mean about liking Taylor having been so embarrassing for so long that people take like the success as vindication that it was cool all along even when they were being laughed at for it. That all makes sense to me.

[loser-jpg]

so a few days ago i posted an outfit i wore. this outfit would be described as 'handsome' or 'dapper' or some other masculine compliment because it was a masculine outfit, and was in no way childish or anything like that

now my mothers over here on the phone with her sister. describing this outfit as "cute". IT WAS A BUTTON UP WITH ROLLED UP SLEEVES AND A SUIT VEST. WOMAN IN WHAT WORLD IS THIS CUTE? i was described as looking like a bartender and a rockstar. HOW CUTE? she also just refered to me as a 'female' which like yes she hasnt been told im trans but...female? who describes anyone like that?

shes just crazy and trying to cope with the fact that im not the overly feminine childish daughter she wanted me to be. shes tried to sexualize me before you know. 17 year old me in a pub with my parents she makes a joke about how i "could catch the waiters attention" said waiter being obviously well into at least his late 30s if not 40s. and then she was clueless on why i got mad at her and her disgusting behavior. also as a kid i would sit sort of manspreading but with my feet lifted onto the seat and at the ripe age of i dont fuckin know 7? shed tell me to AND I QUOTE 'close your legs' she also constantly thinks i need a size small in shit when it just doesnt fit (i have not been size small for years) and has made multiple strange comments about my appearance all from 'you have no ass' to 'your so cute i lived your life' said when she is fully aware i do not appreciate being described as cute. she is also constantly trying to force me into form fitting and feminine clothes when she herself has told people i dont like them.

ok this was not the original intent of this post lmao but yeah my moms...weird. to say the least. she doesnt act like this with my sister too which is the even weirder thing. shes like a boy mom but doesnt know im a boy

[blurred-pride]

Im glad the trips went well :D

:0 tag us if you post the Dino

Those sound like great ideas for gender system(s) I think some rly cool things could come from that >:D

Yeah same I’m slowly began fronting the most and-

>:) now I rly wanna make the coining blog

Have any name/url ideas?

It probably could be super “fancy” yk how made are like sunflower themed or lovecore etc I don’t think we could keep up with fancy tags and keeping the blog looking fancy but we could maybe keep up a space theme

Oh yea- gotta take care of the body /Silly/Cj (cope joke)

We’ll go enjoy that tea and time with partners (I need more info on the dnd story line lmao what’s going on, how did he get to the bar, why does he need to conceal his identity?!/Silly/Nf)

Dino post is coming up in a moment, I need to do the dishes real quick and take a picture of him!!! (And make an image description for said picture so that may take a small bit because I am Bad at those- /lh) Thank you!!

I don't front the most but I have a tendency to get stuck in front quite a bit when I do front, and I have to readjust to needing actual things like food instead of just needing that as more of a "this is a thing I do not because I need to because I'm a metaphysical human thing/snake but because it feels more normal and 'human-ish' to do so than to go without". (/source and headspace) I also end up having to remember I can't just shapeshift, and so I end up changing shape in the innerworld and then having phantom limbs or sensations in the outerword. I think our most frequent fronters at the moment are Remus (he/they/it/any neos), and Virgil (he/they/it/scary neos), but I don't know for sure because I don't really manage that part of keeping track of the system. /tangent

Make the blog!!! It'd be great!!! (/nf) I don't remember if our blog has a theme other than "queer mogai"? And then space because space is a long term hyperfixation of ours, and bat-cat from CRK because someone decided they liked him and used him for a barcode icon thing. /lh

Some name/URL ideas: Spacequeers, Coining-in-Space, and heyyyycoining !!

I will!!! And of course!! So basically our character is a bright blue and pink tiefling named Aribis, he uses he/him pronouns, and occasionally they/them alongside he/him, and he grew up in a temple so he's been really sheltered from everything as a kid, and never really got that whole socializing with people thing down as a kid, it was just a bunch of stuffy adults so he didn't really get the chance. One day he was out in town, just doing some stuff, when a deer lady named Mylico (pronounced my-lih-ko) came up and asked if he wanted to go on a quest. Aribis said yes, and he joined the party to find an ancient lost city. One of the first few days he threatened another player character named Ace (he/him), and Ace threatened him back until they made a truce. Eventually, the party split up, and he and Ace got paired together to go down a different path and explore. The two met an evil old lady, who fed Aribis a poison cookie that knocked him out for a while. Ace defeated the old lady and carried Aribis back to the rest of the party. Aribis remained passed out for a while, if I remember right someone healed him?? And then Aribis was awake for about all of thirty minutes, since the cookie had more effects and knocked him out again. Dude kinda went into a coma for four days (We had left town and couldn't play, so they just knocked him out again with our permission.) , and during that coma the party found the lost city, and Ace is carrying Aribis the entire time, except the city wasn't actually lost. In the world this is in, elves aren't liked or trusted at all, and tieflings are very much the rich and extremely upper class. Aribis is not trusted in this city at all, and it would go into lockdown if everyone knew he was a tiefling. So, the rest of the party raided a scarecrow and stole its clothing, which included fancy boots (Aribis had boots, but they replaced them anyways for some reason??), a flannel, and a comically large hat. Ace provided some gardening gloves and boom! Disguise for a passed-out Aribis!! The party then plans to stage a revolution to help make everyone realize that elves are not horrible, and to take down the tiefling government. (Aribis is chill with this btw, he does not like most tieflings because they tend to be snobby and rude from wealth and such.) The party plans said revolution at an EXTREMELY fancy restaurant, and brings Aribis along for some reason. They order him a fruit salad, and kinda just slump him over into a chair, still disguised as a gardener-cowboy. (I joked that he faceplanted into the salad and nobody noticed) Other things that happened while he was passed out, in no particular order: the party caught an owl for the goddess of winter and gave her proposal advice to help her propose to her girlfriend (Ironic because our last DND character, Finley (they/them), attempted to catch a blood hawk in a backpack and failed, thus exposing that their backpack wasn't sentient, but instead had a very small octopus shaped god in it, and Aribis missed the opportunity to catch a bird.), had Christmas and new years (days are different in this world), Ace and another character, Hermes (he/him), made a bet with a god, Ace gambled against said god, and now Hermes has this god who owes him unlimited favors forever, and some other things I don't remember. The session that we had today included Aribis waking up after four days, still dressed up, and getting a run-down of all that happened, another threatening match between Ace and Aribis (Aribis threatened to both bite and cry at him), and bonding time over laser tag. Aribis also at some point acquired a pet rat named Pi-Rat in the woods. I probably forgot a lot of stuff since I am not the one who played the last few sessions, but that's all I know right now. :)

-Janus (he/she, masc/neutral terms)

[rupsmorge]

Hold Me, Please?

Spencer Reid x Gn! Reader

Summary: Spencer doesn't realize reader's rought day at work is the cause of their quietness. So being the genius he is, he starts spewing facts just to be inturpted by a sad reader who wants cuddles asap.

Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

cw: hospital, discussion childhood cancer, death in childhood (lightly skimmed over), chronic fatigue & pain, cursing, case talk (made up case)

an: hi! this is my first fanfic so it's probably gonna be rough lol. My y/n's will most likely all have a chronic illness or disablity of some kind and a lot will mention childhood cancer or working in a hospital. Im disabled and rarely see y/n with them. Also my dream job is to be an oncology childlife specialist. anyways have fun & pls be nice to me :D

Spencer didn't think twice about you being quiet after coming home from work. He knew how fatigued you were after working long hours at the children's hospital. What he didn't know is that your silence wasn't because of fatigue or pain, but because today was bad. In fact, bad didn't even cover it- today was hell. Being a Child Life Specialist on the oncology floor had it's perks but it also has some rough downfalls. The hardest two are having newly diagnosed kids- because you know the grueling treatment they're about to experience- and the kids who's lives that have ended too early. Today, oh lordy, today seemed to be a shit show of both. There were 3 freshly diagnosed kids and one passing all in 10 hours. Its a lot to process and recover from and one way you cope is by become quiet.

Some days you just don't feel like talking. It's not always because you're exhausted or grieving, you just aren't in the mood for speaking. So it's not Spencer's fault for misinterpreting your silence.

As soon as you changed clothes and walked into the kitchen, Reid started to tell you all the new facts he learned from a mushroom documentary he watched. He followed you to the breakfast bar, leaning against it as he talked while simultaneously watching you make a warm cup of tea.

You see, today was a rare day Spencer had off. He'd been on a case in Maine that dealt with mushrooms being used in helping with decomposition. To say the least, the unsub was not a fun guy (fungi, get it? lmao I'm dumb) and the team needed a well deserved break.

And while you usually, almost always, love his factual rambles, all you wanted was for him to be quietly cuddling with you on couch as you watch Little Shop of Horrors. Being in his arms was both of you twos favorite thing. He loved to play with your hair as he held onto you while you played with the side seam of his shirt absentmindedly.

"I know you say it as a joke but I don't think we can say 'People eat dead mushrooms, mushrooms eat dead people,' anymore. The case really ruined it. Did you kn-"

You probably didn't know but at the moment you didn't care so you interrupted him- "Spencer, I love you. But please just shut up for a minute and hold me. Please?"

Wide eyed, Spencer immediately realized why you had been so quiet and moppey; today was a "bad one". "It was a bad day wasn't it? I'm sorry, love. Come on, let go snuggle."

And with that being said, he grabbed a hold of your hand and dragged you to the couch. Spencer layed down first, then pulled you on top of him, knowing you liked to lay your head on his chest. The sound of his heart's steady beat always calms you down. Once all snuggled down and comfy you opened up.

"Today was awful, Spence. So many new commers, so many families are having their lives flipped upside down. But we also lost a kiddo today. I know I can't tell you much cause of HIPPA but, god Spencer, I'm so fucking tired of seeing cancer take these sweet, innocent souls."

As you started to cry a little, Spencer lightly traced your arms up and down with his fingers. "I know you do bubs. I'm so sorry... How about we order some Mexican food and watch your favorite musical? Try to get your mind off of it?"

"That sounds perfect. Thank you, bubba. I love you and I'm sorry I told you to shut up."

Spencer lightly laughed at your comment "it's okay. I probably would of too if I were in your shoes. I love you."

You kissed him softly and quickly on the lips then nuzzled into the crook of his neck just as Spencer started the movie. Maybe today could be a little better than before, because in Spencer's arms everything seemed to be okay again.

[fairy-pd]

Gabriel May finally finds a healthy coping mechanism - agere hcs

Hurt/comfort, gremlin man gets the love he deserves, GN reader, regressor!reader, sfw, mentions of trauma

MY BEAUTIFUL BABY MAN BABY. I LOVE HIM YOUR HONOR. HE STINKS SO BAD G O D

general hcs:

I cannot stress this enough: in this household we support Gabriel's rights and Gabriel's wrongs

In my opinion he was just a really misunderstood and abused kid, who coped with ppl villainizing him constantly by becoming the monster everyone accused him of being

He internalized his traumatic experiences and now believes he's basically the antichrist and that he's incapable of changing

Also he could've not, yknow, killed a bunch of ppl and terrorized his sister for years, he is totally responsible for being a shitty person dont get me wrong

But at the same time, he was a kid. I feel bad for the fact that becoming this vengeful ghost of a person was the best option in his young mind. No child should ever have to make that choice, no kid should even consider that as a choice

He still is, in some ways, mentally a child. He didn't get to experience the milestones for an adult that Emily did, and from day one he was treated like a thing. His inner child is constantly *screaming* at him, begging for attention, but he got pretty good at pushing his feelings down and ignoring his own needs while in pursuit of his goals

He is very very immature because of all this. Think tantrums, having a terrible sense of object permanence, deeply rooted abandonment issues, etc

Even tho Emily managed to lock in that mind??? prison ??? thing??? he still gets out from time to time and that's how he met you: fucking around town while he could

Im not gonna dwelve in too deep as to how you guys started a relationship (romantic or platonic) but now you're the only person he trusts

He is capable of feeling empathy, just not a lot and not for everyone. With you he feels incredibly sensitive and caring, which is totally foreign to him and kinda makes him feel like he's gone "soft" - so don't make fun of him (or a big a deal out of the whole thing) when he expresses concern, or he will shut you down like he did with his sister

I kinda hc him as using sarcasm/humor to cope, so he'd be cracking some witty jokes here and there whenever he's nervous about doing something

his regression/caregiving style:

He is a flip through and through, though it would take a long time for him to accept his "little" side

He hates being vulnerable, hates not having the upper hand and control over things, so he would downright beat himself up for being "weak" and still having these childlike needs and thoughts

But remember he feels like he's doomed, like he can't help being a "monster"? Being a caregiver would help him immensely with these thoughts because even though he's a piece of shit gremlin, he would never intentionally hurt a child

So by letting yourself regress around him he would learn he can choose his fate. He is not doomed, because he is capable of seeing you in your most vulnerable state and not even consider the idea of taking advantage of that

And that blows his mind off lmao

And for some ~mysterious reason~ he starts to feel a little better, and to do a little better

Needless to say Emily is beyond grateful you're in their lives. Gabriel totally refuses to go to therapy (doctorphobic lol), and their relationship is as bad as it gets, but since you showed up Gabriel hasn't been a prick to her. He is very moody still, but they're not fighting over control of their brain and body anymore. Because of you, they started to be able to tolerate each other's presence and now they try their best to both not fight in front of you and to share their body as best as they can

He lowkey doesn't know how to act around you at first lmao, its kinda of endearing. He wont show but he's gonna be panicking inside and will wonder if the slightest touch or thing he says would hurt you

He cares. A lot, all the time, and since its just the two of you and he feels so strangely safe around you, he'll allow himself to be 100% invested in taking care of you

He's a craftsman, which could maybe make you think he'd spoil you rotten with gifts (which he will) but I feel he also wouldn't want to shut up about how absolutely adorable you look

Wouldn't go too crazy with the nicknames tho, at most would call you kitten/puppy/bunny

I figured moving probably feels pretty painful to him, so he'll deal a lot better with calm/sleepy regressors

But don't get too excited thinking he'd let you do whatever you want: he can and he will put you on one of those kid leashes with the backpack if he has to

I think that, with time, he'd go from a sort of lenient cg to a more strict one- it would help him to give someone rules to follow cus he'd have to take care of himself better to be able to take care of you

The most therapeutic thing to him about all this is to be able to give someone the childhood he didn't get to have: you'll never feel alone, he'll never belittle you or make you feel like there's something inherently wrong with you

On the contrary: he'd make a point on teaching your regressed self to love and accept yourself as best as you can

BIG fan of gentle parenting, got a tiktok account solely to watch those vids and to make mental notes on how to better care for you

Would get pretty jealous and protective over you and your relationship, specially around Emily

If you guys ever go out together and you happen to regress in public he will not let you feel bad about it. You better not take that paci out of your mouth honey, cus there's nothing to be ashamed of here

He isnt super big on parental nicknames, thinks dada/papa is fine but absolutely prefers bubba over those

Isnt super excited about touch at first either. At the begging of your relationship he would outright refuse it, but since discovering his cg headspace he has allowed himself to admit he's absolutely somewhat touch starved

Expect lots of little touches here and there, like brushing hair out of your face/tucking it behind your ear, adjusting your clothes, fixing your eyebrows, etc

Melts when you hug or compliment him. Will never ever let himself admit it tho, but will thank you for doing it

He keeps every drawing/little gifts you give him somewhere Emily wont find it, so he can 1) keep small you all to himself 2) protect his reputation as a stone cold and uncaring guy and 3) gush to himself over how lucky he is to have found you

Remember he's a craftsman? He loves making you big gifts out of literally anything he can get his hands on i.e. has turned one of Emily's old wooden pieces into a bunch of Montessori-inspired toys and plans on doing it again, cus fuck you Emily

Despite being good with big pieces, his fine motor skills are a disaster (thanks for having to use Emily's arms backwards). If you ever let him do your hair he will mess it up (and will get a good laugh out of both of you)

He is a great storyteller and loves playing pretend: will make up bed time stories on the spot

He's got a lot to learn, but if you give him enough love and try to be patient he'll outmatch your energy and will dedicate himself, body and soul, to you

Super caring cg once he finds a safe place to live and thrive in

i love him thats all. hope it wasnt too bad!! im kinda sleepy so apologies if something isn't consistent, I'll proofread this later. see ya, pt. 3 of tommy hewitt as a cg coming soon after this one❤

[tenyacore]

dads when you have depression

-> father figure! present mic, aizawa, and all might.

i didnt know what to title this lol. i back. i uhhh have not existed for the last idk how long. i might explain what happened later if you guys are curious, its nothing interesting just my journey with trying to better myself 💆🏽‍♀️ [EDIT PRE POST: GAH DAMN WAIT IVE BEEN GONE A WHOLE MONTH... UM... IM SO SORRY]

warnings: uhhhh. homie idk obvious one is depression ig?? and language.

word count: 198 (present mic), 223 (aizawa), 225 (all might).

alternative title: i do not have a father figure so i must substitute my absent dad for a 2d dad LMAO ....

check out my masterlist for more of my works!!

PRESENT MIC

♡ the overly enthusiastic father figure.

♡ offers to drive you to the pharmacy for refills, therapy sessions, visits to your psychiatrist, anything you need.

♡ always makes sure you know that you can tell him anything, but also that he understands if something is too recent or uncomfortable to talk about, and gives you your space.

♡ tries to brighten the place, and makes your surroundings clean and lively so that your environment does not further depress you.

♡ is supportive of any type of way you try to cheer yourself up.

♡ you decide you’re going to try to eat healthy since you’ve heard a good diet can impact mental health? he’s all in with you, he’s giving up junk food too.

♡ is loud and boisterous to a certain degree. If he sees that its just irritating and frustrating you more than it’s making you laugh, he quiets down (dw, he’s not hurt by it).

♡ all in all, rather than just being understanding, he gently nudges you towards the self care route.

♡ no, not the face masks and bubble baths type self care, the cry it all out and dig deep to find what really is the issue type of self care.

AIZAWA

♡ the experienced and tired father figure.

♡ one of his “kids” is a traumatized little girl and the other is a sleep deprived homosexual, so he knows his way around dealing with trauma, depression, and pain.

♡ he’s much more chill than present mic, but he still worries his ass off because of you three.

♡ because of this little mentally ill found family you guys have, some days everyone is too emotionally drained so i feel like you guys have started a tradition of cuddling up on the couch to comfort each other without further stressing one another out.

♡ these cuddle sessions are very private though, because shinsou is probably one of those tsundere mfs.

♡ aizawa certainly has a unique and sarcastic way of joking around (as does shinsou) so i think he picks up on cues that today you’re just not in the mood and gives you a break.

♡ he’s much more of a sit back and observe type of person, only jumping in if he sees that you’re digging yourself a hole you might not be able to dig yourself out of in the end.

♡ he lets you take care of yourself because he wants you to learn how to be independent and form healthy coping mechanisms rather than depending on him.

♡ he still loves you and takes care of you willingly, though.

ALL MIGHT

♡ the inexperienced and stressed father.

♡ his ass probably reads books about depression because he just doesn't have a clue as to what to do.

♡ you know izuku’s broccoli ass probably has anxiety too so all might has a plate full of things to learn.

♡ he lets you explain and teach him what you think you need him to know and help you with, and never oversteps boundaries.

♡ he's very cautious about what may or may not hurt/affect you but doesn't show it all that much.

♡ it may at some times feel like he’s a bit distant but that's not because he doesn’t care about you, rather he is unconsciously putting space between you and him so he doesn’t accidentally do something wrong.

♡ lots of trial and error, but he takes it seriously and with some time and experience he gets the hang of being a father figure to you.

♡ he isn't the type to be visibly anxious or fretful, rather his worries are often things in the back of his mind or things he thinks about lying awake at night before falling asleep.

♡ he definitely seems like more of a serious/low energy person when out of his big muscle version so he goes out of his way a bit to ensure you know he cares even if he physically looks like he doesn't.

[ratscraftz]

Creepypasta makes people think murder is ok how tf do you like it? It romanticizes bad stuff it’s bad to enjoy it. There’s no way you could like it without being a bad person

(idk I’m bad at this sorry)

(For other people reading this this is my friend lol I asked for asks like this Im not mad at them)

Im assuming people who say "it literally makes you think its okay to do bad things" are referring to the Slenderman stabbing

I looked into it and honestly. Come on those girls were 11-12 at the time and creepypasta oc's were gaining popularity. They probably said stuff like "Im the REAL Jeff the killer XD" like a bunch of kids did/do.

And even if they WERE being stalked by "Slenderman" (which is VERY unlikely) that still doesn't excuse their actions nor does it mean EVERY SINGLE creepypasta fan is like that

"dOeSnT cReEpYpAsTa rOmAnTiCiZe mUrDeR" if being a fandom with horror in it means romanticizing murder/other bad things then so does every other horror fandom wtf if ur gonna criticize us go criticize other stuff too lol.

And before anyone says "BUT CREEPYPASTA HAS X READER STUFF AND SHIP STUFF AND-!!" yeah bitch so does every other horror fandom we're no different.

And a little unrelated but people who say "people in the creepypasta fandom make ABELIST JOKES. They're all RACIST and think it's FUNNY to joke about TRAUMA"

Truth is, you're right. There are abelist and racist people in this fandom. Hell some of the creators are fucking creeps but like I said, every fandom has people like that.

And the joking about trauma thing, most people make jokes about their problems to cope. I make jokes about my sh and insecurities like that. But I do stop if people ask me to. I know there is some people that don't but most people will

Also most people who criticize the fandom have never even BEEN IN IT

Like bestie you literally have no right here to talk shit about it...

Anyways I feel like people who try and bring down creepypasta fans forget that it's literally a horror fandom so like ofc there's gonna be gore and murder and other stuff like that but like I said so does every other horror media go criticize them if u wanna shit on us

Sorry if this is real spread out--

That last bit is directed at someone LMAO

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb part 6.1

🎶 Back on the bullshit I never got off🎶

Is this another unnecessary story arc?? With three sections??

Yes.

Wushanju Crew Chat

Wang Meng: You know, I’m someone who appreciates consistency in my day. My life is pleasant, very few issues indeed if you ignore the big ones. And yet. Yet here we are. With unresolved messes at the end of a day.

Wang Pangzi: SOMETHIN YOU NEED TO SAY MARY POPPINS

Wang Meng: We need to talk about Huo Daofu and the glittery bead curtain.

Wang Pangzi: MY FAVE TEEN WIZARD SERIES

Wu Xie: did you turn on that suggested word thingy lol

What glittery bead curtain

Wang Meng: I closed the shop at 6:00pm this evening on the dot. I locked all of the doors in and out of the shop very carefully, especially in light of recent events. The hall leading to the back office was empty. I filed the day’s paperwork, updated and sent emails, and then spent an extra hour organizing receipts and dusting. When I came back out, there were glittery iridescent bead curtains over the front entrance to the shop.

What could this mean?

Wu Xie: uh that you need to spend less time at work?

Wang Pangzi: LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ONE FOR THE DETECTIVES. THE MYSTERY OF THE BEDAZZLED THRESHOLD COMMENCES

Wu Xie: I think we can be relatively secure in thinking a glittery bead curtain isn’t a hostile threat

Wang Pangzi: SAYS YOU

I REMEMBER YE OLDE EXPLORATION TIMES HOW FAST THINGS GOT FURIOUS

BEANBAG CHAIRS SET AFLAME AND LEFT ON DOORSTEPS AS A WARNING

GLITTERBOMBS FOR DAYS

PANIC AT THE DISCO

Wang Meng: Ugh, forget it. I should have just taken them down, regardless of who they belong to.

Zhang Qiling: They are not mine.

Wang Pangzi: A BOLD STATEMENT COMING FROM OUR PRIME SUSPECT

SOMEONE QUICK GO DRAW CHALK AROUND THE DOORWAY TO MARK THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

Wang Meng: Do we know anyone who *would* sneak in and put those up? For whatever reason, legal or not? Even as a joke?

Wang Pangzi: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING WHETHER WE KNOW ANYONE WHO IS CHAOTIC, AN OUTLAW, A PRANKSTER AND/OR SNEAKS INTO PLACES

BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN OUR SUSPECT LIST IS LITERALLY EVERYONE WE KNOW EXCEPT FOR YOU.

Wu Xie: okay let’s think about this; for starters, I didn’t break into my own shop

Wang Meng: You would be in danger of doing some work in the process, that’s true.

Wang Pangzi: LOL

Wu Xie: ANYWAY let’s keep going. For example, Xiao Ge would only break in somewhere for a good reason. Xiao Ge, did you do this?

Zhang Qiling: No.

Wu Xie: okay who’s next

Wang Pangzi: YOU REALLY MISSED YOUR CALLING IN INTERROGATION TIANZHEN

REALLY PUT THE SCREWS TO HIM

IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE;)

Zhang Qiling: How can we be certain *you* didn’t do it?

Wang Meng: Admittedly that was my guess, too.

Wang Pangzi: WOW I SEE HOW IT IS

BLAME PANGZI AS USUAL

ANYWAY HOW DOES HUO DAOFU FIT INTO THIS

Wu Xie: Oh yeah him! Oops I got distracted

Wang Pangzi: UR ENTIRE HISTORY IN A NUTSHELL

Wu Xie: Ugh fuck off

Wang Meng what abt Huo Daofu??

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wu Xie: oh sorry xiaoge I didn’t realize you wouldn’t have spent much time around him last year

He and I go way back

Zhang Qiling: Way back where?

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: I CANNOT BELIEVE HE IS BUYING YOUR INNOCENT ACT

IF YOU EVER TURN TO EVIL WE ARE FUCKED

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO HUO DAOFU IS

YOU WERE EXTREMELY POLITE AND BORDERLINE FRIENDLY TOWARDS HIM

Zhang Qiling: I wanted him to feel welcome. I wanted to be sure he understands he has a place here. A specific place.

Wang Pangzi: FOR A SILENT GUY YOU ARE A MASTER AT SUBTLE POWER PLAYS IM ALL TINGLY

LMAO THE IDEA OF WU XIE LEAVING YOU FOR HUO DAOFU IS HILARIOUS AND ALSO NOPE

Zhang Qiling: Rationally, I understand that.

Main Chat

Wang Meng: Huo Daofu is coming for the weekend—didn’t Wu Xie tell you? Wu Xie asked me to check in a week ahead so we could start getting ready for his arrival

Wu Xie: oh yeah I did do that

Wang Meng: Fortunately I know you and so I already went ahead and took care of everything.

Re: the trip

He made a deal with Wu Xie’s doctor that he would do periodic checkups on him here at Wushanju

Bc Wu Xie hates being in the hospital

And frankly the hospital hates him too

Wang Pangzi: FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT LOL

I FORGOT HUO DAOFU WAS DOING THAT

A VERY CHIVALROUS GESTURE

WOULDNT YOU SAY

XIOAGE

Zhang Qiling: Is it safe for him to be here with a criminal loose on the premises?

Wu Xie: Right, back to the curtain! Let’s focus on the curtain, hmm?

Wang Pangzi: I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS WEEKEND.

ALSO WE CAN RULE OUT XIAO BAI FOR THE CURTAIN SHE JUST SENT A SELFIE FROM NORWAY COVERED IN GREEN SLIME WITH ZERO CONTEXT, UR PROTEGE INDEED

Wu Xie: okay but who else would do something so oddly charming yet illegal and—wait.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: hey, Glasses hasn’t been in touch lately right?

Li Cu: uh nope

Unless u count the outdated memes

Why, is money or Xie Yuchen missing

Or is this curtain related, I saw Wang Meng’s tweet

Wu Xie: haha no nothing to worry about really

(I mean maybe? but who knows)

Wang Meng is probably just getting a little paranoid in his old age

Li Cu: better than getting reckless and stupid as hell in ur old age

Wu Xie: …hey:(

Unknown Number: Li Cu, we discussed this.

Wu Xie: ????????

Li Cu: *sigh* fine, reckless and stupid as heck

Unknown Number: …close enough.

Wu Xie: EXCUSE who is that

Madame, Sir, Non-Binary Tree Spirit, etc—whomst the fuck

Are you

Li Cu is underage FYI

So Im staying on this chat

Li Cu: okay first of all, it’s not like that

Second of all I’m literally not underage I s2g

u threw the embarrassing surprise bday party, okay so u should remember

And C, that’s my counselor and I invited her. She wanted to meet u and I knew u wouldn’t agree to a visit so I added her to our chat

we have been discussing u

Wu Xie: Oh wow!!!!!!!

What a surprise:)

hi so nice to meet you:)

Main Chat:

Wu Xie: RED FUCKING ALERT

FUCK THE CURTAIN FUCK THE VISIT

IVE BEEN TRICKED INTO FAMILY THERAPY BY A SMUG TEENAGER WHO TEXTS UNKNOWN NUMBERS

Wang Meng: I assume that means something to someone here?

Not my problem? Good.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHA GOD I LOVE LI CU

HES LIKE ADORABLE KARMA FOR ALL THE SHIT YOUVE PUT ME THROUGH

IM RAISING HIS ALLOWANCE

Wu Xie: wait i give him an allowance

has he been collecting on two allowances??

Zhang Qiling: Three. I knew about both of yours.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: so uh may I ask your name?

Unknown Number: you can call me Ms. Lee.

Now, if you’re comfortable talking in this format, why don’t you tell me how things have been going?

Wu Xie: oh everything is normal and fine and safe as usual, why do you ask:)

Li Cu: I heard about ur necklace thing. nice of you to NOT mention it.

another dangerous adventure. again. prick.

Ur lucky your cool boyfriend cares about you so much or you’d have already died like ten years ago

Wu Xie: lol try twenty years ago

Li Cu: That isn’t funny.

Unknown Number: …What?

Wu Xie: shit ur right, okay that was a bit glib, my apologies.

…I use humor as a coping mechanism?

Unknown Number: and Li Cu, how do you feel about that?

Li Cu: he doesn’t even know what that phrase means

He doesn’t cope, like ever

In fact

It’s kind of why we met

Which is a funny story in retrospect tbh

Wu Xie: haha what are you talking about sweetie hahaha need I remind you of certain anecdotes that could idk send me to jail maybe lmao

Unknown Number: …You know, perhaps an in-person meeting might be more effective?

Wu Xie: haha such a nice idea but why

Main Chat

Wu Xie: If I go to jail, I’ll have to create alliances for protection, right, that’s how it works on tv

Who do we know who spends time in jail

Other than Hei Yangjing, he’s only ever there for like 12 hours and i suspect he just gets himself arrested bc he enjoys the breaking out process

Also how’s the curtain case coming along

Zhang Qiling: Has someone threatened you?

Wu Xie: well not yet but soon I’m sure

Wang Pangzi: WHERE WAS THIS PARANOIA WHEN WE GOT TAKEN TO THE TEA HOUSE HUH

Snake Eyes Minus Your Fucking Therapist Chat

Li Cu: okay how tf did u pull off spy and undercover shit

u are sus as hell

Wu Xie: damn son is it pick on Wu Xie night

I missed the flyers or I would’ve invited my uncles

Also re: the curtain it’s been mostly solved

Li Cu: I’m not your son, idiot.

Wu Xie: …oh. Sorry, sorry, you’re right, bad choice of words, haha

Forget i said anything

Delete this chat even

Li Cu: shit I meant

Legally, biologically, I meant—

shit

…I turn into an asshole as a coping mechanism?

Wu Xie: oh that’s all okay! I have to go do something else now let me know if you need anything okay kid thanks!

Li Cu: goddamn it calm down who’s the kid here

lemme organize my thoughts so I can articulate my emotions fuckin healthily or w/e

Ugh maybe for like one afternoon we could go to Ms. Lee together? She knows how to word stuff

Wu Xie: uh…okay.

Li Cu: Anyway you don’t need to worry abt jail

As if you would survive prison for one day you’d piss off half the place in like an hour or less

I gave Ms. Lee the heavily edited version of the desert highway to hell roadtrip and i discussed it more in terms of like “nightmarish but still wouldn’t take any of it back”

Well maybe the sand

that shit was everywhere

Wu Xie: oh kiddo. It’s fine, really…You don’t have to explain yourself to me.

Li Cu: no, no it’s just

I do technically have a dad

who is an asshole. Being a son doesn’t really mean shit to me bc it sucked.

So you need to stop backing down just cuz ur guilty abt stuff. I’m really really glad ur not my dad in a good way. Do u get what I mean there

Where’s the mafia widower I followed into hell, huh

Wu Xie: Ur a good kid, despite my influence. I’m really glad you have someone to talk to after everything I…after everything. Wow this talking through feelings thing is kind of weird but nice ur right

Jfc no wonder it took me and xiaoge so long to—you know what, we won’t get into that

Li Cu: ew tmi

Also re: this week’s recent necklace fuckery

I moved my stuff here, I live here now

So you can’t die anymore

Or else…Idk I don’t have a threat planned

anyways abt the curtain

Wu Xie: oh my god, kid…kid you have no idea

I am in tears.

Li Cu: see this is why I can’t be nice to you I can sense the hallmark channel from here

Ugh don’t be sad in ur room that’s dumb

Go hug Pangzi or something

Maybe delete this chat

Or the curtain thing

Focus on the curtain thing

Just stfu and go away

Wu Xie: <3 screenshotting this <3

Li Cu: I take back everything I said. This is why Xiao Ge sleeps on the roof. I hope the ghosts of the Wangs put up that curtain to strangle you somehow. Go die in a stupid way, it’ll suit you.

Wu Xie: lol don’t worry I’m not gonna embarrass you with it or anything

Main Chat

Wu Xie: omg guys look how cute my kid is *sending screenshot*

Wang Pangzi: I MEAN

HE IS WISHING YOU DEATH

BUT SURE

CUTE I GUESS

Wu Xie: no but read the whole thing:):):)

Zhang Qiling: It is indeed very hard to remain angry with you. And you are welcome to join me on the roof.

Wang Pangzi: UH NOPE

NOT WHENI HAD TO BLEACH THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN

DONT TRAUMATIZE THE EARLY BIRDS THEYRE ALREADY FREAKED OUT BY U YA HOODIE CRYPTID

Wu Xie: ok true but babe ur like a sexy cryptid

Wang Meng: so, are we just accepting that there is a glittery curtain of unknown origin, and Huo Daofu is going to have to see it while he’s waiting for you at Wushanju bc you’re going to family therapy?

Wu Xie: right

Wang Pangzi: SHOULDA TAKEN EARLY RETIREMENT HUH

Wang Meng: I’m going to go dust something.

Unnamed Chat:

Unknown number: so the curtain…

Unknown number 2: yep, not my best work but I kinda panicked last minute u know

Unknown number: what is in the water at Wushanju that makes everyone dumb and attractive

Unknown number 2: relax they’ll figure it out