#im happy to see everyone here actually
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Me: Hey, can I please have content for the poc characters on The Boys universe? Especially MM, Victoria, and Marie?
Tumblr:
#but let it be for homelander or soldier boy and i'll get results galore 🙄#no i do not care about those nasty racist yte men give me substance give me flavor give me actually interesting characters#like it's very evident this fandom hardly cares for their black and other poc characters and it shows#like i can't even go through the characters tags without seeing majority content that isn't even about them#especially for mm#i'll never forget how he was literally having a panic attack at seeing sb but everyone was like “SOLDIER BOY IS SO HOT”#like why is there so few mm x reader &/or marie x reader!?#heck there's little for victoria and kimiko! like yall COME ON!#im happy that jordan was able to blow up on here bc at least im getting fed content#but why do i see more stuff them x cate x reader in some way than i do with them x reader x marie!?#yall be doing marie so dirty sometimes 😭#the boys#mother's milk#marvin milk#marie moreau#victoria neuman#kimiko miyashiro#like i just barely find stuff for victoria and kimiko but its not enough 😭#I DON'T CARE ABOUT BUTCHER GET HIM OFF MY DASH
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the elderly and their matching gloves
#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#yakuza series#ryu ga gotoku 7#yakuza like a dragon#yakuza 7#arasawa#jo sawashiro#masumi arakawa#snap sketches#i have one (1) more class today in about an hour and then im freeeeee. until 8am tomrrow 🧍♂️#NO IM MAD LEMME EXPLAIN so the reason why i even drew this was cause i was supposed to meet with my counselor#TO DROP THAT CLASS ACTUALLY cause i very quickly remembered conceptual art was a movement and not. Concept Art#and so here MY DUMBASS sitting in a zoom call for almost three hours waiting for him to get there#and he NEEEVVVER SHOWS UP BRO i have genuine beef with this dude he's SOO bad at responding to emails and showing up for zoom#oh well.... at least i can give everyone old people...#i almost binned this but i liked arakawa's face too much. also i NEVER DRAW THEM OLD I NEED TO POST WHAT I GOT#i actually have more doodles in mind- i had a sawashiro sketch that i didnt like but i really wanna make the concept work#and then i was thinking of a Not Depressing Comic so. yay.#LISTEN we know i love angst and putting everyone through The Horrors but i just wanna see them happy...#ok bye im gonna. Hm.#idk actually i only have an hour and im already dressed for class#i guess ill try sketching out that comic..#BYE
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decided to leave my job and i'm gonna fr gonna cryyyyy
#literally can't work with my new boss bc i can't trust her#she went to the head of the department with complaints abt me without ever speaking to me or giving me any indication she was unhappy#and various other reasons im not happy w management and the school in general#HOWEVER#i love the kids sm and im gonna miss them and worry abt them 😭😭😭😭#im literally scared for some of them bc it feels like the other teachers have no empathy for some of my favorite kids#one of them who is so so sweet and when he cries i'm the girst to comfort him bc everyone else thinks he needs to toughen up 😭#also my new boss sucks so so bad and is gonna be such a bad influence on him and all the other kids#and my main co teacher said she's gonna quit if i do so i cant even beg her to look out for my babies and take care of them 😭💔#and it would be unprofessional to mention any concerns to the parents but genuinely some of the kids would be better off elsewhere#like im actually worried about it#i dont want some of the really sweet sensitive kids to lose their sweetness bc they're being treated unkindly#and the worst bullies and spoiled kids are the ones the teachers dote on#so it encourages some of the sweet ones to act out for attention#anyway 💔#i really do need to go tho#and i'm sure i'll love the kids at my new job#but im so sadddd#also its unlikely i can find a well paying job w this age group even tho i love this age group#its basically impossible not to get attached to them at this age and i get to pick them up and hold and cuddle them and stuff#and you cant really do that with the older kids sadly#literally on the verge of tears even seriously thinking abt leaving#things have been p bad for a while due to management but i never seriously considered leaving bc i love the kids so much#but i literally can't see a future here#and my new boss clearly hates me and im worried she's going to try to get me fired#she already made up a bunch of lies about me and its only been three weeks#anyway i only make 15 an hour so hopefully i'll at least get more somewhere else and i know i'll still love the kids#its just really hard#which is why i've stayed this long#i was p unhappy before my new boss even started bc of the way they treated my old boss
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Today.............. has genuinely. Been. A Day.
Have some OC doodles I started yesterday before tragedy struck and are like the bare minimum effort for today to finish. Since the two princes were originally not /in canon/ for another plot but rather made for a mafia AU as cousins to one of the main characters for the base plot. I was like. Huh let's give them a happier life. So here they're just princes and instead of the police department/detectives that most of the main cast is in base plot, those are the royal guards around the twins' castle.
#my characters#the funny thing is that the princes are like......... made for an au of another plot#and here they are in another au of the plot#so like yeehaw everyone i love my ocs and i love putting them in situations#also idk what its worth but hey happy pride atticus is trans im proud of him#it has zero relevance to the plot but its important to me that hes trans#he also is like.... an absolute bundle of friendliness which is a huge contrast to the twins cousin#who is extremely stoic for the most part and finds it hard to feel emotions and thinks#everyone feels the same way all the time like him - WHICH IS DEPRESSED BY THE WAY#but he learns that ah nope thats just him and oh hes better by the power of love#and he doesnt actually get it ?? like in canon or mafia or as a prince hes just like#huh i like this guy and he makes me want to smile which is really odd im gonna stay by him if i can#and doesnt even realize right away hes fallen in love#atticus and caspian however are very aware of their emotions and are v happy to see their cousin feel things#and are constantly there to tease him but support him and help him and theyre all good boys#ill shut up in the tags now bc the tags are taking me as long to type as the art took to doodle
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curse of ireland's only real known, widespread influence outside of ireland being a youtuber and a musical artist. like babes im so sorry to ruin whatever quirky fairycore bogland or super hype loud fun idea you may or may not have of ireland but. it isnt that im sorry. its literally just a place
edit: i put too many fucking tags on this post and it broke so youre just going to miss out on my immaculate rants. tumblr fucking hates me
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vent in tags
#i feel so unloved and liek im a burden to everyone i know. i want to hide in a closet and stay there forever#by myself and at peace. its quiet andni dont have to do anything#no one can make fun of me and no one can make me feel like im a bother#i dont like being alive#every day feels the same as the last#the days are going by but nothjng is changing#i dont see the point in going forward#i know life is only going to get harder from here#im well aware#thats a big part of the reason of me wanting to disappear#no one wants to talk to me. no one wants to be with me. they either tolerate me because theyre kind or they just dont bother even pretendin#to like me#which. is fair. i dont blame them in the least#doesn't stop me from being sad#ive been spending all my breaks with my teachers. i think they pity me#i feel so bad for bothering them. im just so empty inside i need company#im so pathetic#i think i should just kill myself#i need constant reassurance that people actually want me around but no one is giving it. probably becaude thye dont want me around and dont#have the heart ro say it#i think i should disappear#i cant connect with anyone i know. everyone around me just thjnks i need to shut up#i dont have a happy place anymore#ill only ever reach that happy plac3 when i die#even then i wont be happy. just relieved#relieved that its all over
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in general, sometimes i really wonder what sort of impression i make on this place
#some told me (ily muach) but this sort of question do appear sometimes#like i know my personality and such#but like writing wise#and like from things i do here i really wonder how people see me#probably because im also new here and a bit tmi but this is like the most active i have been in socmed after quite a l o n g while#everyone here has been nothing but kind to me tho ily everyone#im glad im here hahaha#maybe one day i will talk about how happy i am whenever i talk to someone here#as a shy person it really means a lot to me haha#okay this is getting embarassing but yeah that question does exist#babblings#it's been 3 work days right so yeah let me be noisy this once again#or maybe i should make another blog that i treat like a priv acc and i dump everything there#hey thats a good idea actually#there are many things i want to say but all in all im really happy to be here. thank you everyone#i am still learning on how to express it and about interaction all in all as i am still as much of as a grandma as when i first start#but there is that. ily everyone#just putting this out here for a bit haha. might as well
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I'm now doing a perfect job at work :) senior engineers found no problems with my work :) I know this was only two projects, but this has been my goal for 3-4 months and I'm finally there.
#totes bro#i need a generic tag for my disclaimer#but this is for me when i go back through my blog in the future#i used to 'blog' more but this is fun to see 3 years from now#disclaimer over#granted he isnt really trying but im doing better than a guy thats been here 18 years#im right now the most reliable engineer 1 :)#which means I get more projects and harder projects which i normally dont like#i like to be able to do nothing#but theyre fun when theyre hard#and.....im actually happy to go to work because its enjoyable#which is good that im on good terms with everyone and dont get annoyed#because im here for the next 25 years#i do everything with an understanding that im setting up my next 25 years so dont makr this stressful#the reason being if im here that long i get pension#so essentially double social security when i retire#+ a very good matched retirement account#work for the government. you make less now but i go home at 4:30#benefits are great
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"why are you dropping e**ie for to**y? you just want to see bvck with a man, it's not about him having a good relationship!"
btch i could give you a 100 reasons why T0mmy is a good relationship for Bvck (not that any of you would listen) & that there's nothing wrong with enjoying the actual canon queer couple on my screen over a fanon one just cuz YOU think the story is heading in a direction that has never been promised to you and you can't let go of your fandom ideals.
in the mean time i'll be over here cheering on Bvck's canon happiness with his possible soon-to-be future canon boyfriend.
#once again i am not tagging this#cuz im sick of seeing ppl's negative opinions in tags#& i am adamant about not doing that myself hence the censored names#like i loved bddie for years#and their friendship still means the world to me#but im not holding onto something that may never happen#and letting it get in the way of what is actually being written and given to me#esp when what's being written is being done with so much care and thought put into it by everyone involved#im happy here#YOU guys are the miserable ones because your feelings are being hurt that not everyone wants to cling to fanon#& the reason for that is because it makes you scared that if not everyone screams their desire for the fanon ship that it'll never happen#news flash the fandom is only thousands of people#the GA is millions#you don't have much say and leverage as you think you do#especially because so many of the fandom's views don't actually officially count towards the ratings#a harsh fact but a necessary one to realize
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ive stayed up till 2 am and unlocked some secret hater energy 😊
#i will not elaborate too much here#all i will say is some ppl are not willing at all to engage with the actual story/atmosphere/tone of a given thing#im sorry but. 'what if the character who causes conflict was just Not There so everyone can be a happy found family!!“#well then i dont think wed have that story at all and you are thinking of an entirely different thing.#yknow i generally have a lot of insecurity wrt like. 'ogre so stupid he cant even identify past surface level themes'#but maybe im not doing too bad? at the very least i feel like i try to. idk. engage with what i am presented.#coughs hi sorry.#ultimately people can do whatever they want and it is harmless at the end of the day.#i will side eye certain things though.#addition i am not talking abt anyone here i went into the tag for a game i checked out to see ppls thoughts#and saw a post that ig irked me
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Alright gw2 peeps, here's one for all of you with a lot of alts:
All your characters of the same class (e.g. all your rangers) are stuck together in an escape room.
Which of your "class groups" is off the worst and who gets the job done with no problem?
#edit: yall did this way more detailed than my word salad so lemme redo this class by class as well:#eles: not awful. overall a relatively cooperative group despite very differing personalities.#wouldnt be the fastest in finding the solutions but definitely are getting out of there without casualties or other damages#necros: shit tier dynamics. hostile charr that wants to be left alone vs. volatile chak madman vs. way too gentle sylvari plant#communication would NOT go well but they would make it out (neljje contributes NOTHING to this)#mesmers: nightmare courtier who is out to be as destructive on purpose as possible vs. just some guy vs. tvekks (enough said)#tvekks will suffer but they'll probably make it out. maybe. im unsure.#rangers: actually competent. if we ignore the hostile inquest rat in the room we're left with a competent charr leader and a#very cooperative norn huntsman (and bobbie but he contributes absolutely nothing). they will get out just fine.#engineers: disaster. there might be dead. too many egos in one room and a poor norn who just wants to get out beween everyone fighting#she might jus solve this on her own while the other three are about to slice each other's throats#thieves: absolute hell tier. mordrem sylvari trying to eat everything he can possble dig his teeth into.#a mildly confused human who probably just tries her best while the asura in the room is suffering psychic damage caused by#the mordrem and the charr that will simply not shut up for one second#i do not see ANYONE managing to get a solution in these conditions even if individually they might just be able to.#revs: awkward atmosphere between happy upbeat asura kid and really grumpy charr but they're getting through it#warriors: also a weird clash of personalities but they'd pull their asscheeks together and get out of there#and finally the guardians: no destructive force in here. just two very mature people and a slightly chaotic but otherwise clever bard#absolute dream team coming up with solutions. peace and happiness.#budgie plays gw2
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oh btw anxiety had me by the throat so i haven't really mentioned it yet but i got a new (Real Adult™️) job :'D i'm working w a charity helping adults w intellectual disabilities!!
#ive been working here for the last 2 weeks or so it actually rules#and its so much more chill than working at the grocery store (or god forbid the hardware store)#everyone is SO nice. like they are all so so nice. literally all of the staff And all the clients ive met#and its decent money for entry level. def not the biggest reason i like it but id be lying if i said i wasnt happy w that too lol#levi.txt#took forever for my records check to come back and halfway through i convinced myself i did Secret Crimes and would lose the job over it#so i didnt want to talk too openly abt it in case i jinxed myself i guess?#welcome to my brain its a hellscape#but i think the thing im happiest w tho is that i feel like it actually really matters. its actually smth im proud to say im doing#its going to be so nice to actually see that the work im doing makes a real difference in the world
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in honor of the tpot short with the failed debuters (assumedly) being announced soon heres my tierlist of all the tpot debuters most favorite to least
tags for longer opinions :3
#i dont really hate any of them and avocado is just down there because I kind of enjoy everyone else more . The only I feel like . Any kind+#+of Real negativity at all to are nonexisty and 9ball#nonexisty because fuck off and 9ball because that’s just 8ball but different gimmick . And 8ball is already not the best imo#tpot#happy taggy got in bc they n winner were my favorites . I have my reaction to taggy getting in recorded I love taggy a lot#what can I say im a :3 girl#i like leek because it’s a plant also they put a hatsune miku ref in the episode with the flip phone triple baka#pda is a device which is always awesome forever and it looks like theyr gonna have a role in the short which is :DDDDDD#onigiri is fun because it’s a fun romaji . it would also be funny if they called em jelly donut . but onigiri is cool they look like+#+a rocky clone Maybe or if they’re just mute hey I Really Like Mute Characters So Win. cause I Think they were the only one who didn’t+#+speak in the episode . Don’t take my word for it I haven’t watched tpot 1 in a while lol (I think boom mic didn’t speak either actually)#boom mic; clapboard; and camera I speak as 3 together . Theyre super awesome and it would be fun to see if they have a dynamic . Cuase+#+theyre like . All movie equipment . Idk I remember long back ago i roleplayed em they mean a lot to me#i like tha vhsy a little more because reminds me of that freak from TAOT who i just adore . Also novel rectangular thing also kind of prett#tape friend looks like a menace and I like characters that are menaces I think them and six could be friends#sink I just like the design of lol . also I like the song kitchen sink by tøp#salt lamp is cool because I like salt lamps and they’re pretty colors both on and off#shopping cart is silly . I like wheeled characters#blender is an appliance I like how they did the asset#discy’s prettyyyy colored#battery is small and cute they also might be the mute character idr I haven’t seen them talk personally . Feel free to correct me if any+#+info I say here is wrong btw#Snare drum is small and cool and I like how they look#Anchor is also I like how they look also listen to anchor by caize#shell is like emo and a good shape#rubber spatula; scissors; tax guy I forget their name; and shampoo I think have good designs#avocado im so sorry I just like everyone else more than u im not the biggest fan ever of things like donut mouth#and I already explained the last 2 awesome 👍
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same soup... different day
#hello it is sarah in the tags again#i feel like i tell myself i'll actually use this as a blog and then i forget and then i remember and then i forget again#venting ahead if that is not ur jam (talking to the 2 followers who actually see my posts)#i like tumblr because it;s so removed from my personal life that it feels really like a place i dont have to be anything for anyone#anyway i've been wondering if i should go back to therapy again but i feel like they might get tired of me because i keep bailing and comin#back like an addict lol like i swear i'll commit this time! sike. ghost be upon ye#anyway this time i'd come in for the big D#i don't like the floor it just feels closer to being six feet under and a bit like where i belong#i feel like a great number of things have happened in the past year and i've met all of it with a very lukewarm sense of dread and anxiety#its not even about feeling happy i dont even think i can feel shaken by anything. i feel like people see my apathy and think it's confidenc#anyway im not going back. they always say the same thing. can't do shit about shit life syndrome. and i don't want pills i'm so sick of the#isn't it something that i'm especially depressed the day before i start my new job? it's a tradition at this point. cheers#isn't it cruel that everyone in my life seem to put me on some kind of bizarre pedestal and no one questions my decisions or authority and#i battle with myself to figure out if i'm doing the right thing (no one will tell me the truth they are all scared of me getting angry)#was talking with a friend about how it'll be if i join their group project in a module we're taking soon.#and she's like well isn't it obvious? everyone will just listen to whatever you say and we'll end up doing well.#no one would challenge you because you're always right. and it's like.. yeah. i guess. okay. (hate that i know she's not wrong)#lol can u tell this is why house is kind of getting to me. learning lots of things about myself watching that man commit medical malpractic#anyway. i didn't ghost my therapist this time i remember now. she left the clinic lol she asked me to connect on linkedin. that was amusing#i always feel like the therapists here never know what to do with me and i kind of have to hold their hand a bit through my psyche#also they seem to be a bit at awe of me which is a bit annoying. and i know that definitely sounds like Issues but it's just like#ugh not you too. please stop i'm sick of it i'm sick with it. i don't want you to be inspired by my awful life and how i handled it#and i have nothing to say for it but... *gestures vaguely* of all of this
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hi nina! do you have any other songs that you think cd would cover? i just really liked new perspective and i think ur music taste is rlly cool :3
d'awww!!! hi there, sweet pea! <3
tysm for your ask but, before you start reading ( because this message got VERY long ), i just want to let everyone know that i used this ask to explain some Very Complex Ravenstan/Callgirl Fake Dating Lore...so if you are interested in that, it starts towards the middle of this ask...it's a lil chaotic, but i tried to make it as interesting and clear as i could! no obligation to read, ofc, as always, but i did want to preface this ask with that info, so you know this one is
*Secretly An Important RM Lore Ask.*
but back to what i was doing ( screaming ):
— because aAAAAAAAAAA!!!! c': <333
i am not even joking, you guys, despite the fact that my fic is based almost entirely around Music, i avoided answering music-related asks for so LONG bc i was legitimately so nervous about it being negatively perceived or read for filth on here, which, i Know, is silly because it's my fanfic and what i say goes, i can't change my music taste anymore than i can change the way my dna loops, but...idk.
like, i feel like A Lot of people are self conscious abt their music taste, but my social anxiety/inferiority complex can get so gnarly that i actually get Nervous when people ask me about what kind of music i like and i never EVER sit shot gun in cars bc i am...scared to aux. :/
iiiiiit's...That Bad. ( nina, please get therapy. )
i also feel like people in this fandom can get Very Intense about what kind of music they associate with the boys/what music the boys listen to and are FRIGHTENINGLY QUICK to rip people to shreds over opinions that don't align with theirs or aren't obscure or 'cool' enough.
bc of that, i try to be Very Lowkey on this blog because the larger part of this fandom and the criminally insane level at which they escalate petty fights over canon/fanon, like to the point that they are frothing at the mouth and start doxing people...gives me Extreme Stress. which, in my line of work, i actually CANNOT have happen.
tldr; i want absolutely NO part of it and like my lil corner.
thank you for keeping it Safe. <3
AND THANK YOU FOR ENJOYING MY MUSIC TASTE!!! EEEE c: <3 THAT IS SO REASURRING AND HEALING FOR ME TO HEAR!!!! MUSIC TO MY EARS, BABY! LITERALLY! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THAAAANK YOU! *holds you* *squishes you* *kisses ur head*
istg, if nothing else the fact that i have a bunch of you rocking out to New Perspective and positively associating it with my fanfic means that i have done my job and that's a legacy i'm willing to die with.
i'm being so serious, i feel like if rm was a tv show, it would play as the outro to every episode...but like a nice, soft, raw version w/ ravenstan on acoustic guitar to contrast the hard ass cd cover of style by tswizz that i think would open every episode...smh, nina, please, pleease stop imagining your unfinished, crack-fanfic as a netflix og series. >.>
BUT!!! okay!!!! in vein of trying not to worry about the perception of my music taste or what other people want from me...tHIS IS A KIND OF CONTREVERSIAL TAKE BUT I TIED IT TO THE PLOT, OKAY?
so, as a little nina lore and for context, when i was in elementary school around like 4th/5th grade, i was listening to like a lot of early y2k bangers, ig. dirty little secret by all american rejects, hey there delilah by the plain white tees, girlfriend by avril lavigne core, etc.
( just to make you giggle, i also had a ps2 and there was a series of video games called singstar that were some off shoot of rockband/gh that had mics you plugged directly into the system...pls note my high score on sk8r boi really should be put in the guinness world records, like if you held a gun to my head and told me to sing that song, i not only would i fuck it up but i would LIVE, baby! better luck next time! )
...it was also around early disney channel times ( the disney channel games with the team colors...that was my OLYMPICS, bitch! ) and i had this Disney Pop Hits Vol...1? i think? cd i used to play on the prehistoric radio thing in my room and my favorite song on it was...
pop princess by the click five.
AND I KNOW!!! I KNOOOOOW!!!! controversial take, but i am sorry, THAT SONG FUCKS!!!! THAT SONG IS SOOOO AWESOME!!!!!
and i feel like when ravenstan was fake dating call girl during the great hate south park embark, cd covered it: i am picturing a less finger-bang, btr, disney channel esqe sound and more of a pop-punk, pedal to the metal, electric guitar type, edgy rockstar boy typa beat.
but Yes, i think ravenstan covered it or idk i really think that it was made FOR call girl. and it was BAD ASF. i also think bc tcf wrote that song about hannah montana ( iconic ), and bc call girl is basically the whole internet's e-girl bubblegum pop princess in my fanfic, it just...
makes...Sense.
am i making sense? do we see the vision? aka rs in his lil pants w/ the ripped red and black flannel tied around his waist, fallin to his knees, singing his heart out, pointing at her, winking? PPL DIIIIIIIIIED.
and by people, i do mean jerseykyle n bebe who were MAD AS HELL,
-- but also tapping their toe...smh.
it was both very cool and very annoying. RIP.
( ...do i have jersey and bebe make out during the pop princess call girl tribute as mlm/wlw solidarity? HEEEELP ICOOONIC *jk vibrating with stress and anger vc* barbara, i need you to do somethin for me don't ask questions, i'll explain later, It's Important sdks MESSY! )
BUT OKAY!!!! SPEAAAAKING OF THEM AND THAT AND CALLGIRL AND RAVEN OF CRIMSON DAWN DATING!!!! i wanted to give you some lore and some spoilery plot about that/them bc it is burning a Hole in my brain...i must discuss r.s. and call girl becaaaause
~Its....Complicated.~
ANYWAYS!!!! IMPORTANT PLOT TIME!!!!
so, for more context: i am currently working on another ask abt how ike found out that jerseykyle/ravenstan used to be dating and during that conversation in kyle's room about three days into the sp trip, CONCURRENTLY somewhere Else, ravenstan and call girl are getting ready to do some flashy PR thing like go on a date/get din, idk.
BUT RIGHT BEFORE IT: ravenstan and call girl are alone together, and ravenstan, who, i am not even kidding you, is sooo fucking Pissed that this is EVEN HAPPENING because kyle is super mad at him, was like you are Actually Dead to me, WILL NOT TALK TO HIM...
( which without spoiling too much -- is actually why ike can tell that somethin Fucked Up is happening because j.k. is super aggressive and loud and is not afraid to Fuck Your Shit Up...but has not laid a FINGER on raven of crimson dawn...and actually, seems to not even want to be Near him, barely acknowledges his existence, leaves rooms that he is in and is Radio Silent around him...WHICH IS TWICE AS SCARY AS J.K. YELLING AND TRYING TO KILL YOU. so, uhh, Not fucking...Good, you guys. ike was like...this is...not fucking normal. )
but again, he cannot tell kyle what is going on bc he might actuuuuallly get MURDERED??? uh???
anyways, in whatever secure, secluded space rae/cg are in ( its somewhere private, i pictured a dressing room of sorts, like a makeup trailer, somewhere they have to take pics ) stan is Extremely Straight Up with her and says something to the effect of:
"i have no idea what you think this is or what you want this to be or what they told you, but we are not dating and this...is NOT. Real."
and call girl ( aka wendy whose identity is a secret to EVERYONE, No One has seen the bottom half of call girl's face...Ever. she changes her wigs everyday, they are Very Elaborate and is always in a very high tech face mask that covers her face from the nose down and uses a voice modulator to mask her speaking voice...a mysterious queen ) oddly enough seems completely relieved by this statement and is like
*squints*
"don't worry, Emo Boy. feeling is mutual. like, no offense, but you are seriously...not my type. Ew. trust me, i don’t want to do this either but,
— I Have To."
wHICHSHDLSKDHLSD SHE GUTTED HIM HELP. he was *gigantic stan slow eye blinks in shock* like "right, okay, Ow. that was...Mean." kshdlksdls but then was "--but i am glad we...agree. i Also HAVE To. not because of publicity, it's...Deeper than that...i can't really ta--"
to which call girl, locking eyes with him, dead seriously, lowering her modulated voice is like...
"it's tenorman, right?
He Threatened You."
and r.s, gagged! Again!!! is like
"holy shit, he THREATENED /YOU/ TOO?!?!"
and call girl nods very slowly and starts to say
"he told me if i didn't do it he would..."
and rs with the same kind of mounting horror whispers
" — Kill Everyone You Love And Care About?"
which, at this point, folks, they are both like...
...WOAH.
bc they realize they are both stuck in the same torture chamber together, they Both got cornered into this really elaborate ruse and have to keep it up in order to keep the people that they love Safe and it's...A Lot. it...really is. but it's also sort of freeing and cathartic to knowing you are not alone going through what is pretty much the worst thing that has ever happened to you in your entire life.
i also feel like...there is this natural bond. this Energy between them. like they understand/see each other and feel...safe with one another.
and call girl, guard still up, dips a toe in uncharted water, and goes:
"well...since were partners in crime now and have to live a lie in public...i think we at least owe it to each other in private...
...to be Real."
she offers this bc they have reached an understanding, an impasse, a standstill, a draw of sorts. and there is a thick tension...as well as this crescendoing vulnerability that hangs the air with her ultimatum as they stare warily at each other, strangers, both wearing still wearing their masks, call girl physically in hers and stan in his metaphorical one doing the dark, raspy smoke and mirrors raven voice bc he is...not sure about her in the same way that she is...
...still not sure abt him.
( they are basically that one spiderman meme where both the spidermans are holding each other at gun point. ) and it's a huge Risk to indulge her request, but again...they both have everything to lose.
and no one...but Eachother.
so he indulges her very tentatively and counters:
"alright...then, tell me something Real, call girl."
to which she nods, closes her eyes and goes. "fine. my real name..."
call girl trails off, reaches up to tap the voice modulator on her mask, turns it off, reaches out her rhine-stoned, sequined, hot pink faux leather gloved hand out to shake his and in her real voice, says,
" — Is Wendy."
and this...is a Very BIG Deal.
again, no one has ever heard call girl's voice before. no one knows what her name is or Anything about her. she doesn't even preform live, she does virtual concerts and is basically this sort of mysterious, ai, vocaloid/miku internet personality that is very Carefully and elaborately Coded and ENCRYPTED to keep her identity Safe.
so her turning off her voice mod and speaking to stan, not as a fictional, larger than life computer-generated celebrity, but as a human being...is massive.
it's also very...Comforting to ravenstan.
who has not been himself...for a very long time. and it's not smart, it's not a good idea, but he decides to trust her and in turn,
in his real voice, says,
"stan. my name...is Stan.
It's Nice To Meet You, Wendy."
he shakes her hand and she shakes his.
she says, "it's nice to meet you too, stan." :)
and it feels...Nice. it should feel wrong, what they're doing, but it feels right, it feels fucking amazing to stop Preforming. she knows his name, she's seen his face...but realizes he still has not seen Hers and running on adrenaline, bolstered by a rare surge of bravery, chinks at her armor, or mask rather, and makes a motion.
literally.
bc he reaches up towards her face and goes, "oof. it's nice to hear your human voice; the dystopian robot voice was lowkey espantoso."
he laughs, it's genuine and super ugly, god bless him. so you Know he's being really real when he asks "but...if it's all the same to you. if were going to speak freely; i'd like to...see Who i am speaking to.
so can i, please, uh...see your Face? your whole face.
your...Real face."
and oof. this...is a little nerve-wracking for wendalends.
she's neeeever taken the mask off. ever. Ever. EVER.
For A-n-y-o-n-e.
but...she might never have the chance again and it is...really stuffy under there. so she Agrees and lets stan remove her face apparatus.
ravenstan does say "Wowza." HDLKSHDSl amazing.
he's also my boyfail king and says something very fucking stupid like
"sorry, you're REALLY Pretty. i was worried might look like deadpool under there." she smiles, it's beautiful. no one has seen her real smile before as call girl and thanks him. she goes on to apologize and is like
"thank you, stan. you're really sweet and i...am sorry i said 'ew'. it's not because you're ugly, you're kind of...Cute for a guy, actually? you have really nice bone structure and very kind eyes. it's just, when i said you weren't my type i meant Boys. in...general."
her voice shakes a little, she's never admitted this out loud before, not even to her girlfriend. but she trusts stan with the nice bone structure and dumb ugly laugh and very kind eyes, so she says
"i'm a...Lesbian.
i'm also Seeing Someone at the moment.
It's Complicated."
and stan is like, skhdlsd way too excited to talk about kyle, and is like
"okay, whew! i'm ALSO seeing someone! or well..." then remembers and is like oooof "well...i Was...seeing someone i guess. it's..."
my man is Depressed and is trying to change the subject because he realizes he actually can't talk about kyle because not only is cartman going to kill him if he does...he is also gonna freakin K!ll Himself because he's actually so sad that kyle currently hates his GUTS.
so he sighs, echoing her and admits "It's...Complicated." :/
he wants to hear something nice though, something real...and nice. because he is a romantico king. who believes more than anything...
in Love.
so he asks her what her girlfriend's name is. <3 :')
annnd i think she is About to say bebe's name...but realizes if she does, it will completely blow her cover.
like her ACTUAL Cover.
because stan knowing her first name and her what she looks like under the mask is one thing...but the second she says bebe's name, it's going to reveal that she is kyle's bebe's wen/wendyl which...is
Meeeeessy.
but she reasons ( as an intelligent, rational queen ) that regardless of how messy things get, her and stan are in this mess together and that the best time to make a mess...is when you are Coming Clean.
still...this is...very sensitive information. she’s not sure how he's gonna take it and needs some sort of collateral.
so she states her terms.
and call girl, who stan now knows is wendy, but not bebe's current girlfriend ( yet ) says "okay. i am going to tell you something, but in order to do it. i have to tell you...Everything. in exchange, i need YOU to tell me Everything. i am going to give you One Chance to do so willingly. if not...i do not care how untraceable you Think you are, i am very familiar with the dark web and i will find out everything i Need to know about you. and do with that information...What. I. Please.
...so /please./ promise me you won't tell anyone about what i am about to tell you...and then, tell me...stan...Something Real."
stan agrees and wendy goes into everything. comes out as trans to him and explains her origin story. ( i started to write everything in this ask but it got too long, i'll tell you all about call girl/wendy in another ask i have a couple in the box i can use, haha. ) she tells him pretty much everything ( it's a big therapy session in there ) up until this point, gaydhd ravenstan...manages to understand
Everything.
and when she finishes, true to the deal, she gently volleys the ball into his court, ( they are friends now, aw <3 ) and softly goes:
"okay...Your Turn."
and so ravenstan...who is Deeply Inspired by wendy...Wowza. he seriously thinks she is so fucking cool and ALSO A TRANS ICON??? HELLO? he feels v seen and heard and safe, so uh...jesus christ, he grabs wendy's hands, takes a veeeeeery deep breath and goes,
"so, i...
— Am DEAD."
LKHDSHSDLKDS HEEELP KSHLKDS
annnnnnd proceeds to tell her everything.
and i do mean...Everything.
they talk for the rest of the night basically, having this heart to heart, at the same time that, unbeknownst to ravenstan, jerseykyle and ike are also having a heart to heart....wendy and stan are platonic besties, they agree to keep each other's secrets as t4t legends stuck in cartman's fucked up marionette hell together, they agree to keep their crazy charade up while they try and find a way out/back to bebe and kyle, take some v convincing publicity pictures together ( i do think jk and bebe see them and want to die So Bad, it's not funny...bebe/jk or wendy/rs...choose your doomed broship. Fml. )
and that's...
Your Crazy Uncle Nina RM Lore Drop For The Night!
i hope you enjoyed it, haha. <3 please feel free to drop me a line in the ole ask box about it and ofc, as always, to ask me anything you would like! if you're still with me...after all this time. thank you so much for supporting me and enjoying my content.
it means...Everything to me.
and in writing something fake...
thank you all:
for being my Something Real. <3 c':
-uncle nina, callgirl/raven superfan
#rm spoilers#i am sorry this was so fucking nuts#idk why i decided to put aside like four hours to write this#but here we are help#i hope it was thrilling#ALSO IM SORRY POP PRINCESS ACTUALLY FUCKS SO HARD I DONT EVEN CARE THAT SONG SLAPS#also if rs dropped the punkrock version of it and held my hand ion stage i would end it all everyone was jealous#especially jerseykyle who was trying to be aloof#okay jerseykyle being silent...its so scary yall its actually frightening and YOU KNOW RS IS ACTING A DAMN FOOL#trying to get him to look at him its sooo...smh like he is acting the hell up like pick me choose me KHDLKSHLD#and surprisingly he is not choosing violence which is actually More violent and three thousand times scarier AAAA :(#BUT RAVENSTAN AND CALL GIRL I FUCKING LOVE THEM THEY ARE BEST FRIENDS I MEAN IT THEY ARE BESTIES#THEY ARE AN UNLIKELY ALLIANCE AGAINST CARTMAN AND IN GAY FUCKED UP CELEBRITY HELL TOGETHER#idk they are very sweet to me and both understand what the other one is going through they are platonic soul mates#they are rockstar popstar jersey and bebe tbh#its such a mess#sorry this is so poorly written i really did my best#and again at this point i am genuinely not sure who is still hanging in there for my weird content but if you want it#here you go baby#feel free to yell at me in the inbox if u would like#it thrills me very much#me at the top of my lungs at two am: pOP PRINCESS HOOOLD MY HAAAAND POP PRINCESS IM A FAAAAAN#POP PRINCESS I NEEED YOU NOW FREAK ME OUT TURN UPSIDE DOOOWOOOoOWOOWn skdhlkshdls#please someone tell me you see the vision i am so passionate about this i am sorry this is so real to me#jk and bebe rage bait making out is peak content#Happy Pride Month 🌈😩
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it is so hard for me not to post every single thought i have on here the moment i have it
#if you think i post a lot (i do) you should see my drafts alkdsfj#A RECAP: i loaded in cori's mom and dad earlier and it made me so sad i was on the brink of retconning cori's entire bg so#that their dad is still alive :(#i did zot as gnb and it was going so well i was about to compliment urianger on here and then he let me die twice to the mob right before#the final boss. rude. also estinien is the only one who actually follows me when i keep running lol#i dont think bard is going to be canon for cori but the deepshadow crossbow IS and i think they would use their aetherotransformer with it#like they do with their multitool/automated crossbow#also im thinking about giving cori back their summoning ability before DT bc im impatient and i feel bad for them :(#but i want them to be primarily mch for DT. but im tired of making them suffer its been almost a YEAR (for me) i want them to be happy agai#and now im going to go take a shower and hopefully write a little bit before i go to bed. BEFORE MIDNIGHT#okay. im free. sorry to everyone who followed me for that corishtola photoset and now have to deal with me akdjfa#i need a text post tag
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