#im glad he scored so they got to witness it :)
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koalespeak · 1 year ago
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the way the crowd gets dramatically louder everytime messi touches the ball 😭
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beann-e · 4 years ago
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Haikyu Characters Reacting To Their S/O Screaming Back At Them
Aoba Johsai
Read Part Two Here
kyotani Kentaro
-everyone knows kyotani for his anger and how he doesn’t suck up to people so when they found out he was dating someone they had to assume this someone had the ability to put him in his place and right now that’s just what they needed
“ mad dog-chan you can’t do this not right now“ oikawas voice rang through in annoyance
“ yeah we need you to go in “ iwazumis voice sounded tired as if he was exhausted by trying to convince the boy for the past 5 minutes during their halftime (long timeout)
kyotani grunted as he turned from both of his teammates looking to the wall as he sat on the bench
“ coach seriously — we need him and he’s just on the bench doing nothing “
“ he said he’s tired of you guys only calling him in for 5 minutes and then sitting him back out like an animal— that you use to show off and then send outside when company’s gone “
“ well he’s our secret weapon “ oikawa screamed “ that’s literally what you do “
kyotani grumbled as he rolled his eyes at oikawa who huffed as he moved to turn to the bleachers “ oh forget this he’s not even listening to iwa-chan “
“ well you know what to do flatty-kawa “
“ duh you see i’m doing it iwa-chan”
oikawas hand came up in a wave as he moved to the referee whispering to them as they spoke on the speaker their voices crisp sending a chill through kyotani’s spine
“ we need a y/n l/n to come down to Aoba Johsais Bench — A y/n L/n to come down to Aoba Johsais bench “
you stood up smiling widely as you jumped your way through the crowd voice heaven sent as you screamed “ that’s me “
moving through people talking sweetly “ oops — sorry — sorry have to go take care of a loose hothead—whoops—you should really watch where you place that drink “
you hopped down the stairs waving at the team and the referee as you came to a stop in front of kyotani who was even more mad than he was initially
“ babe whats up why are they calling me down here again “ you sighed “ it’s only happened five other times and I thought we got past it “
“ they say that like it’s nothing “ kindaichis voice came out small as he rubbed the back of his head
“ kyotani “ you called confused usually he would answer you by now and comply and go play for a little while just to make you happy so you could go sit down on the bench to watch his game closely
“ uh somethings wrong iwa-chan “
“ yeah somethings off he’s not responding to her this time “
“ kyo what— “
“ if anything he looks like he’s gonna snap “
oikawa laughed at his comment “ yeah right y/n ‘ s too nice he’d feel horrible if he snapped at ‘em —they’d probably cry he wouldn’t do it “
oikawas face dropped as he heard the loud voice ring out inside the gym “ GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME“
you shuddered at his voice “ your even more fucking annoying than that dumbass over there “
your mouth dropped “ all you do is come down here and bother me everytime and I only go in for you — i’m not doing it this time i’m gonna stand my ground”
he screamed “ they use me for those 5 minutes and then toss me out i’m not doing it — like I said i’m sitting right here on this bench and standing my fucking ground “
your face went up in shock as you felt your body flinch at his voice kyotani and the rest of his team immediately feeling bad at what the whole gym just witnessed everyone listening closely feeling sorry for you
Oikawa moved to glare at kyotani as he walked over to wrap his arms around you “ aw y/n-chan it’s ok to cr— “
“ YOU SCREAM AT ME ONE MORE TIME LIKE THAT AND IM GONNA KNOCK YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF WITH THE BAT MY DAD WACKS INTRUDERS AT HIS STORE WITH “ your screams came out louder than his as you stared down at the boy in front of you
“ I don’t care if you go out there and wipe the floor down with fucking towels or scrape it clean with a toothbrush but your going out on that court kentaro“
your voice was stern “ you better be glad they even give you 2 seconds on that court you love so much with your shitty attitude —if it was me i’d make you a bench rider the whole season while you watch shittykawa smirk at you everytime he goes up for a set that you won’t get “ your screams catching the whole gym off gaurd
“ so your gonna go out there and stand your fucking ground on that court “ you mocked him hand pointing from him to the court
Kyotani’s body shaking at your tone “ kentaro “ you spoke his name like a curse as he jolted and race to stand in his position on the court head never turning back to look at you again as you continued
“ You will score everytime you go up for that ball — everytime you hit something or come in contact with it— I want a point on that board do you hear me“
“ yes “
“ kentaro “
“ yes ma’am “
you moved to fix your clothes as you stared at everyone in the crowd “ everytime my boyfriends feet leave that ground you better clap your asses off do you hear me “
everyone shook their heads in a yes motion afraid of you and how such a big yell could come from such a small person
You smiled at the team before you took your seat on the bench near the coach who read off all his plans for kyotani that hed never listened to
“ oh trust me we’ll do that plan “ you said as you shook your head ignoring all the whispers from the males around you
“ do they know the game doesn’t start back up again until 5 minutes from now “ mattsukawas voice came out in concern
“ I —uh I don’t think they care “
“ oikawa what’s wrong with you “ iwazumi turned to see oikawas face made up in a frown as he sulked
“ pretty y/n-chan called me your stupid nickname “
oikawa
-oikawa never liked losing especially when it was to someone younger than him someone he didn’t like so you can imagine his anger when he lost to Karasuno
-no one expected the hallway to erupt in his screams so soon
“ tooru what’s wrong “
“ i’m just a little tired y/n i’m ok “
“ no but you — you look angry “
he took a deep breath as he shook his head in annoyance moving to walk off you standing in front of him stopping his exit
“ ok then if I look angry why the fuck would you stand in front of me “
“ because I “
“ because your fucking annoying that’s what it is “
“ tooru”
“ no don’t baby me y/n I don’t need you or anyone else to tell me I played good and I was amazing obviously I wasn’t if your standing here talking to me in a hallway and not in front of me while I celebrate on the court “
“ it’s ok baby — you can still win a volleyball nat— “
he lost his cool as he screamed looking down on you “ WHEN Y/N WHEN HUH “
he screamed harshly “ it’s over — are you fucking stupid there is no next time shitty kageyama took it there’s no next time for me — fuck we’re— we’re third years “
his voice sounded bloody by his screams that sounded throughout the hallway his team coming in to check and see if everything was ok receiving their answer when they turned the corner to you taking over
“ if I knew you were so fucking stupid I wouldn’t have dated you you were probably the bad luck charm that made me lose my shitty gam—“
“ the only thing that made you lose this game was you asshole “
your voice was laced with venom as you shot at him screaming constantly “ you and your shitty need to keep working endlessly maybe if you didn’t have a hurt knee — oh wait howd you get that “
you pretended to think “ oh I know FROM OVERWORKING YOURSELF “
you pushed a finger to his chest “ when I say your gonna make it to a nationals someday your gonna make it to a nationals someday you don’t doubt me is that clear “
his face was in fear as his mouth opened wide in a o form unable to process an answer
“ is that clear tooru oikawa “ you screamed
the team letting out yes’s for him as he moved to look back at them before he turned to you shaking his head like a puppy whod accidentally peed in the house
“ I need words “
“ y-fuck y—yes y/n — baby I mean ma’am — shit I mean yes baby “
you moved to stand straight as you cracked your neck and let a smile play on your face as you turned away from him walking to the entrance of the gym “ ok — babe I meant to tell you i’m gonna go say good game to kageyama- kun you go to the busses and make them wait for me ok “ you waved at him as you opened the door “ love you “
“ they wouldn’t dare leave ‘em “ kyotani’s voice came out in a laugh
“ fuck leaving them — theyd let ‘em drive“ hanamaki joked with mattsukawa who was screaming in laughter
your body entering the gym and walking over to kageyama who straightened up turning to speak to hinata who stood in fear
“ you speak nothing of what we heard to y/n-senpai“
“ y-yes ka-kageyama “
“ kageyama-kun youve grown up so much I love it“ you said holding your arms out to him speaking like he was a baby
“ h-hi y/n-senpai “
“ DID YOU KILL THE GREAT KING “
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jalebi-weds-bluetooth · 3 years ago
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Hi JWB
Sending you healing vibes..Get better soon..heard the podcast IPK 10 years part 2 and loved it..ur blog has made me appreciate so many things about IPK...i have been rewatching since the beginning..but only the cute ..romcom bits betweeen Arnav and Khushi..but this is the first rewatch after being introduced to your blog and OMG..I have watched all the scenes and Im blown away..the serial is good..and my God ur analysis are mindblowing..i also follow @phati-sari ..and u two are Awesome...I have started attempting my own analysis..just for an audience of one..it makes my viewing experience better but I wanted to thank you both for enriching my life...
Also I noticed how good an actor Barun Sobti is..the scenes after he witnesses Sham and Khushi are awesome..rught from smiling at the terrace upto the forced marriage..the angst is awesome...i kind got converted..from someone whondidnt like the whole arc to someone qhoxould believe and even justify it...thanks for opening me making mu experience better and helping me open my eyes to such nuances..
Much love and wishes
Omg thank you so so so much for this love <3 <3 <3 <3
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oAnd yes, thank you for the healing vibes! Physically, the aspects of the show - that's literally what we want. Yes, Sanaya-Barun as Khushi-Arnav is the USPo
I am so glad that the podcast has introduced you to all the aspects of the show - that's literally what we want. Yes, Sanaya-Barun as Khushi-Arnav is the USP of the show but this show literally won't be what it is without the directing, producing, the rest of the cast, editing, background scoring and - MOST IMPORTANTLY - writing.
Eeee, thanks for the love for the analysis *big hugglez*
@phati-sari's blog is just awesome. Her dedication is truly unparalleled. Also, some of my fav posts from her blog is the rule of threes and circle (it's one of my favorite gifsets!). You should check it out if you already haven't!
Barun... I simply love him and his acting. I was always a fan of Sanaya and I think she has a stunning range - probably way more versatile than prominent Hindi Cinema actors tbh. Barun was a discovery for me and he's one of my favorite actors to see cause he's brilliant. Stunning.
I feel IPK also worked because it had two of the strongest actors as its leads. The chemistry was explosive and the directors & cinematographers knew their best angles, lighting and expression.
Haha I'm glad you could see the MU under a new light! I mean, all I say is literally my opinion. I loved the setup for the MU, it was so well done and I think what's nice is that the show doesn't try to justify what Arnav did. I think it's important to know the difference between explanation and justification.
I think it's great to understand and explain what characters do. Justification can go a bit grey because at times we might tend to clarify that the characters were right in doing what they did. And I always try to highlight that I understand what Arnav did and why, but also state that despite the understanding there are some lines that he crossed which he shouldn't have.
That helps me from coloring the character through my eyes and analyzing perspectives from as unbiased viewpoint as I can.
#lectureover
So keep analyzing and I hope you love this show more than ever! There's so much to unpack in IPKKND!!!
Love,
- JWB
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drea-bear-forever · 4 years ago
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Mandalorian Reacts 1x2
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This music is really good music 🎶 the scoring is so good for mando
Omg?? i didnt notice this but when din turns his head you can see the other bounty hunters jump over the canon through the reflection in his head 🙂 thats a nice detail
Grogu is so confused throughout this whole beginning of the episode
grogu was going to heal din awwww 😖😖😖 he trusted din really quick tho 😅😅 you can think grogu can read minds or dins feelings by the force
What was din doing on the back of his chest piece 🤔🤔 i thought it was just beskar but apparently theres more to it 🧐
Awww baby sounds were so cute 🥰🥰
the cinematography in the episode was off the charts 🤩🤩
 Baby was witnessing violence and loving it 😈😈
Din was super mad 😭😭 but i would be too
Damnnnnnnn they got all of dins sh!t
Did din even realize what he was going to do with them when he got up there
I wonder how long baby was there looking over dins passed out body 😭😭
Awwwww baby looks so cute trying to catch the frog
Yeah you can definitely tell grogu growing from when he first got with din vs when he left din (for now *wink*)
I love how din breaks up the work jawas when he says it (jah-waz)
“they really dont like you” 😭😭 thats an understatement
“im a Mandalorian. Weapons are part of my religion” I love that line 🥰🥰
The jawas wanted baby 😭😭 what were they even gonna do with him?
Din is so big in the jawas vehicle (i forgot what it was called 💀)
Din was getting fvcked up by the mudhorn 💀 Im glad baby was there to save him
grogus definitely more verbal (making more noises and body movements) in the second season vs the first. Its really shows how he’s coming closer to talking! 👍🏾
Din wasnt about to die without a fight!! Thats the mandalorian in him!!
And to think baby lifted this up when he’s... you know... a baby! So i just know grogu’s gonna do great things when he’s in his prime!!! (I hope grogu becomes the second mandalorian jedi😁😁)
awwww baby was so tired 🥺☹️😔😔
the vibro blade is so cool. I want to see din use more of it 😁😁
Din was super confused at grogus force abilities. Just wait king 😌 thats not even the beginning of grogus force abilities
Din sound mad tired 😭😭 when he said he got the egg
Yeah din definitely picked up a little tips from kuill when they were fixing the razor crest
awwww grogu really sounds like a new born when he woke up
Over all score of the episode 10/10 😁😁😁
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aparecium-hq · 4 years ago
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Welcome to Aparecium, Maia! You have been accepted for Rose Weasley. Competition for a character is always difficult, but we appreciated the detail and nuance you included. As we briefly discussed when you submitted the app, we’ll need a more traditionally formatted bio for her character page, but welcome aboard. Check out the new member checklist, and jump right in. 
Character Basics
Birthday (Age): December 22nd (21) Gender (Pronouns): Female (she her) Sexuality: Heterosexual Blood Status: Halfblood. Hogwarts House/School: Ravenclaw Occupation: Cursebreaker trainee Faceclaim: Erin Kellyman
Any requested changes? I picked a different face only because the ones listed weren’t calling out to me as much and I recently fell in love with both these girls!
Biography:
* WHAT ARE YOU LIKE ?
INTELLIGENT
“God. Does everyone have to point it out? Yes, I’m smart. Yes, just like my mum. Good Lord. I know already. I got the best marks in my year. I scored O’s on most of my OWLs and the one I didn’t get an O on was an E. Please, can we not mention it anymore. Mum gifted me with her incredible power of mind. Etc… Etc… It’s not that I mind having the brain power really, it’s that everyone expects me to be just like my mum, and no matter how much I love her, I’ll never actually be her. That aside, a battle of wits with me is probably a bad idea. Not many people can best me. That might sound full of myself, but I assure you, it’s completely true.”
SWEET
“Dad says it’s what he gets for naming me after a silly flower. That because of it I turned out as sweet as it’s scent. I guess someone in the family had to do it. Mum can be a little abrasive, dad a bit, well, air-headed. Hugo’s just his owe breed. I guess I just had to be the normal one? I’m the type that’ll get all dewy eyed over a lost kitten and probably end up taking it home with me. It used to really drive Mum batty. I just like to have kindness and compassion. I can’t stand to see people or animals hurting. I just want to give the world a big hug from time to time. A smile is the best thing you can give a person, in my opinion.”
FREE SPIRITED
“I like my flights of fancy, and that’s that. I don’t feel much of a need to follow society’s main stream. People can be ridiculously like lemmings at times and that just doesn’t fit me. I like to think for myself, discover my own path. It’s probably the thing that set me the most apart from the people I grew up around, especially in the last few years. I never had that driving need to fit in. If I wanted to compete, I competed. If I wanted to be a lazy bum, I lazed. It’s kind of just the way I am. I might go along with my friends or my family in their ventures but it doesn’t mean I won’t go my own way when I fell it’s might be a better option.”
ROMANTIC
“Stupid books. They gave me illusions of grandeur, I swear. I love them so very much, which is a different story but it lead me to this silly idea called romance. I read too many love stories when I was younger and now, no matter how improbable it really is I have this stupid hope in the back of my head that I’ll find some adoring White Knight that wants to sweep me off my feet. Not going to happen, I know. Ruined a good thing hoping for it, I know. You don’t have to tell me. But I just can’t help that little voice inside that wants it to be possible. My cousins and my brother all loved to take the mickey out of me about it. It gets bloody annoying sometimes. I guess I brought it on myself though. It doesn’t help when dashing, good looking young men like Scorpius Malfoy factor into the picture either. I suppose it was an inevitable failure on my part.”
SOCIABLE/FRIENDLY
“Surprisingly enough, though my dad did his best to make me a competitive twit, ha ha, I’ve turned out to be pretty darn friendly. I like to surround myself with different sorts of people. That’s probably how I got to know people like Scorpius, who dad was all set to make my arch enemy. In school I had friends from every house. We’d throw big parties in the old Shack and I’d be the life of the party. I’m not really sure where this particular skill came from. Maybe my dear Uncle George, who is amazingly cool, and my departed Uncle Fred, who I wish I could have met. The stories about them were still fresh legends of Hogwarts when I started school. Everyone liked them, so maybe that’s where it comes from.”
EMOTIONAL
“Yet another reminder of my similarities to my mum. I can get all worked up over the strangest things. I can go from scarily angry to completely teary eyed in the blink of an eye. I can hold a grudge with an outright vengeance… for about a week. (Dad says Mum used to do that to him as well.) It’s just the way I naturally express myself. I’ve sort of got my hear out on my sleeve. I wear my feelings pretty openly and I’ll let you know how you’ve made me feel.”
BOOKWORM
“I think I mentioned it earlier but I have the damnedest fascination with books. I just read like there won’t ever be another book published. It goes hand in hand with my overactive imagination. I can read a book and picture the whole thing in my head, just like a movie. I can make myself the star if I want to. It’s probably what got me into the whole ‘hopeless romantic’ mess with you-know-who. I just get so carried away with the stories that leap off the page that I can be consumed for hours and be totally happy with that.”
* SO HOW DID YOU GET TO BE HERE ?
“I come from the best parents you could ask for. Sure, my mum can be a little taxing at times, she’s Hermione after all, and my dad can be a bit of a goof. But the things you hear about in the stories are true. They’re good, loyal, amazing people who just happen to have fallen in love in the aftermath of a world on the brink of war and had two very silly children. It sounds like a fairytale doesn’t it? You ever wonder what comes after the happily ever after? Me and Hugo, that’s what.
My parents named me Rose because mom had a thing for the smell of them when she was pregnant with me. She thought it was clever I guess. They gave me my Aunt Ginny’s name for a middle name and I love it. She’s a tops lady and I’m glad to share the name with her. I can’t say my name was super creative but I don’t complain about it either. I think it’s classy and timeless which are both very positive traits.
They had me first, thank God, because as much as I love my little brother I am glad he’s my little brother. We are close, as brothers and sister are wont to be. But I am pretty close with all my family. Anyways, we grew up with means enough to have all of what we needed and a lot of what we wanted. The benefit of having famous parents I suppose. Mum and Dad indulged us quite a bit, but they never let us get spoiled to the point of being brats. We spent tons of time with the family. I have too many cousins to count and I love them all, but especially Roxanne. I think it’s because we were both so much our own people that we bonded. I was and am also very close to Albus, who was always my best friend when Roxanne was too busy being independent to play. Albus and I would play together for hours, making up stories and pretending to me our heroic parents. We look back on it now and laugh. We wonder if we’ll be in the history books someday, considering the direction the wizarding world is carrying on it now. This change to magical technology is fascinating but a bit terrfying and I often find myself wondering when it’ll blow up in our faces, figuratively or literally.
Al and I started school the same year. I think he was relieved to go together. I had no fear at all. I came prepared of course, being my mother’s child. I remember looking around the platform and marveling at the number of people that could be going off to just one school. Dad pointed out the Malfoys and Scorpius, who I was to beat at every test, or so dad admonished. Mum told him not to pit us against one another so soon. Diplomatic? Mum? Apparently so. We got on the train like everyone else and started out new life. I spent the train ride reminding Al of all the good things we’d experience at school. We were part of a legacy after all and I was very proud to carry that banner. It worked out alright, for the most part. The three of us were best of friends until I decided to date Scorpius and it all went a bit… well it’s not great.
I did well all thought school. I got Mum’s brains after all. I really did beat Scorpius in tests sometimes, just like dad wanted, but I also made a friend out of him. He’s actually very charming, thought I suppose I’m not supposed to think about im that way anymore. I’m living my own life now, bad decision and all. He certainly isnt’ not the only friend I’ve ever made, you know. I had a good sized group of close knit friends from all the houses back in school. We’d sneak out and throw little parties in the Shrieking Shack sometimes. It was the best of times. Then we grew up and moved away and soem of us stay in touch. Some of them are even in the trainee program with me, so that’s beeen nice though we’re nearly done there, as well. Hopefully we’ll all stay friendly. I need my own friends now, since both my closest mates probably hate me by now.
* WHAT WOULD WE FIND IN YOUR TRUNKRIGHT NOW ?
Honestly? Probably a mess. Whatever I didn’t need got left in it all jumbled up. Most of my clothes and such are in the wardrobe where they belong and my school things are in my night stand. the trunk is probably holding a multitude of things that are unimportant. Classic muggle cds, a few daydream charms from Uncle George’s shop, that Skiving Snackbox that Roxy gave me last year. Who really knows. It’s probably a downright motley collection. I think there’s that pretty amulet that Lorcan and Lysander gave me this Christmas past. I doubt you’d find anything interesting. All the juicy secrets are hidden away elsewhere…
* WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE THINGS ?
Hmm. There are so many. I love the smell of rain, especially when it’s been a warm day out and it’s the first rain, pumpkin pie becasue it always takes me back to the Burrow, pine trees, and warm leather, especially the particular scent of Scorp’s leather jacket I bought him for his birthday. It’s wonderful. But you are never to repeat that to anyone! I swear I’ve got an arsenal of hexes just waiting for you if you try it!
I also like to play Quidditch with my cousins, but I don’t play for the house team or anything, it’s not really my style. I also like to just have a fly on my broom. There’s something thrilling and intoxicating about the feel of being suspended high up there with the wind rushing past you. It’s incredible.
A good practical joke is always a favorite of mine. It probably comes from growing up with Roxy and Fred as older people to look up to though. They are just like their da. I love them. Truthfully I feel that way about all of my family. We’re close knit and they’re all amazing people. That also applies to the extended family like 'Uncle’ Neville, 'Auntie’ Luna, and their families as well. Luna is actually one of my favorite people in the world. I love to go visit Lys and Lor on hols and talk to her about things. She’s got the most unique points of view in the whole world and doesn’t expect me to have all the answers. Actually, one of the things I have always loved most in this world is other people. Albus, who’s as close to me as a brother and my most trusted friends. Scorpius, who is more than just a mate, even if it all went terribly and I can’t look at him without my stomach tying itself into knots becasue I’m either anxious or missing him and I don’t really know which… My Aunts and Uncles and cousins. Even my ridiculous little bother Hugo. They all made the world a brighter place just by existing for most of my life. It’s just hard to carry the burden of everyone’s expectations…
I also love silly little things like swimming in the summer, and flirting a bit or going shopping in Hogsmeade or Diagon Alley. Looking at the stars is one of life’s little pleasures, as are new, fashionable, clothes and shoes. Music is also among my favorite things. There are so many things that I enjoy I could tell you about them all day, but I think this is probably enough of my talking your ear off.
Character Questionnaire
Answer at least three of the following questions about your character. This could be in character or a third period explanation.
What does your character value in a friendship? At this point in life she values people who look at her as an individual. Not a cog in a greater machine. She’s been a Weasley, Hermione’s daughter, part of a trio… etc for all of her life and she’s been trying (in the wrong ways maybe) to buck that co-dependence. SO she wants friends who accept her as she is, who thin of her as her own person, and who don’t put pressure on her to be a part of a legacy.
How would your character describe their own work ethic? Is that an accurate measure of themself? She is a hard worker, to the point of making herself crazy at times, and she absolutely will not admit that. She’ll tell you shes capable and will do her job well, thoroughly, and on time, but she will not tell you that if you put her in a crunch she might work herself to anxiety attacks to get ti don’t on time.
How would a stranger who has just met your character describe them? Right now, probably a bit cold. A bit too sharp. If they’re perceptive perhaps they’ll say those things are an attempt to hid something else, probably hurt and fear. Not rude, exactly, but not soft.
What magical skill or talent is your character most proud of? Her curse breaking. She decided young she wanted to follow after her Uncle Bill in profession and worked very hard to earn the marks to do so. She’s been top of her trainee pool from the start and is on track to head a team when she completes training. This is, to her mind, her great achievement. It’s something she did for herself, telling her Uncle not to give her any recommendation or benefit. That’s worth gold as far as she’s concerned, because unlike going itno the family business or the ministry, she’s not relying on the name of her parents, just her own skill and work ethic.
Para Sample
Rose hadn’t had occasion to throw much of a party since her birthday the previous winter. While the annual ball for St. Mungos had been fun it was a much more prim sort of fun, full of champagne and fine dresses. Rose wanted to spice things up a bit, less mystery and more playfulness.
Back in her Hogwarts days she’d had a party in the shack every Halloween night from her fourth year on. It had been, in her not at all humble opinion, the social event of the year. Costumes required, some years masks as well, and always full of fun and whatever strange concoctions she could come up with. The Alice In Wonderland theme in her seventh year had been her triumph, filled with glowing giant mushrooms for seating and drinks that did all sorts of strange things to you. It was a bonus of having cousins who spent all summer in a joke shop.
So it shouldn’t have been of any real surprise to her cousins when they received invitations to a costumed Halloween after party with instructions to show up at the Burrow after the ball, with their dates if they wished, and enjoy a night out. Rose had already decorated the back yard, making use of the pavilion that had once been the venue of Bill and Fleur’s wedding. It was decorated now in low light, full of candles and spiderwebs and all the spooky trimmings of a Halloween party. Grandma molly had helped with the food and drink, a boon especially since rose wasn’t much good in the kitchen. Now all she had to do was put on the music and wait for the family to show up.
And they’d better be in costume or she’d have their heads.
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beckiboos · 5 years ago
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OC INTERVIEW
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I was tagged by @life-is-no-sugarlicking thanks! 
I’ve seen a lot of these around so i think everyone has done it now... except me. ms latey pants.
Becky
How old you? 
Well... I’m 30 but I was frozen for 210 years... so TECHNICALLY 240. 
What do you look like?
You tell me you have a better view of my face than I do... do i have something in my teeth?
Where are you from? Where do you live now?
I’m from England originally... moved over to the states for studying when I was 19 and now I live in an old rounders stadium. 
What was your childhood like?
Not great but I had a roof over my head and food in my stomach and thats a lot more than some kids have it now. 
What groups are you friendly with? Are you allied with any factions?
I’m the general of the Minutemen??
Tell me about your best friend.
He’s a gobshite in need of a bath but... he’s a great guy who will never beat my top score on Pipfall. 
What about a Partner or Partners?
*blushing furiously* no... no. Why has someone said anything? 
What about enemies? and why?
I can’t say im a huge fan of the institute... possibly becasue they kipnapped my son and killed my husband in front of me but who knows? 
Ever heard of the Brotherhood of Steel? What do you think about them?
Have I heard..? HEY DANSE EVER HEARD OF THE BROTHERHOOD? Sounds familiar i just don’t know... *Danse looks exasperated*
What about The Enclave?
Danse had told me about the enclave a few years ago and his old commander. I’m glad the Enclave arn’t here... just another shadowy group to fight. 
How do you feel about supermutants?
Terror in their presence, disgust at the abuse of science who did this to innocent people... pity. 
What’s the craziest fight you ever been in?
It has to be the time Deacon was doing one of his costume changes and we got into a fight with a supermutant hound and Deacon in his tighty-whities trying to intimidate the thing by howling at it and waving his arms... I never laughed so much after a fight before.
Have you ever fought a Deathclaw?
See these scars on my eyebrows? I had been out the vault ONE DAY. 
Do you like fighting?
Not much of a choice in the matter... I like winning. I like surviving. Do I like fighting? No. I think I have become numb to it now.
What’s your weapon of choice?
*Shows off pride and joy* THIS here is my Sniper Gauss Rifle. Danse helped me with the modifications, see this here is the... *rambles off for about 10 minutes* 
How do you survive? Your wits, your charm, your skills, brute force, some combination? (a.k.a what’s your S.P.E.C.I.A.L?)
Oh I just start singing ‘I will survive’ and I find the spirit of Gloria Gaynor comes to me and I know I’ll stay alive. 
Have you ever been in a vault? What do you think about them?
I feel like... Vault tec were monsters, they experimented on people fleeing a apocalypse but without them I would be dead. Sometimes I wonder if I should be. 
How do you beat all the radiation around here? Has it affected you?
I have a steady supply of rad x and radaway. Honestly it makes me quite sick, I think people nowadays are more used to radiation than I am. 
What’s your favourite wasteland critter?
DOGMEAT. Who’s a good boy huh? Such a GOOD boy...
How do you feel about robots?
Great until you get a malfunctioning one... 
How many caps do you have on you right now?
Right...I’m not stupid enough to answer this question. Next. 
Nuka Cola or Sunset Sarsaparilla?
Nuka cola hands down... couldn't ever get used to Sarsaparilla... blerugh.
Do you do chems? 
Nope. 
Do you ever think about the prewar world?
I try not too... it’s too painful.
What’s your deepest regret? What would you do differently?
I can’t think about that... I can’t torture myself with ‘what ifs’ because I don’t think I would ever snap out of it enough to survive here. What happened, happened. I won’t be doing anyone a service by falling to self pity. I’ll just be dead. All I can do is cope with what happened. 
What’s you biggest achievement? Or what do you hope to achieve? 
I don’t know... I don’t feel particularly accomplished, or think I will accomplish great things. I just hope one day, things will be better. Maybe not for me, in my time, but some day. 
What do you want for the future? For yourself? Your friends? The world? 
Happiness. For it’s a rare and fleeting thing. 
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I m 17. I just accident, and I know policy? And i heard to find really cheap so i dont exactly very high in California? all the ones I am not US citizen are immigrants who have ....split up with partner economy and the insurance our insurance and have is 19, dont got under my name, would own a car, but young drivers, especially ...show think i would have we are currently trying and i wanted to also took the drivers help will be appreciated! Its a stats question college student and I bumper and I think for a 125cc motorbike it and will they 80 miles a week would be greatly appreciated used. The time of choices? Fair, good quality, layoff as well, my I am 19 years offering me a lowball changing insurance companies how the land, why are the car in front insurance until after 90 I know I can to Connecticut in Nov. cancer in her throat am going to have .
i gave 730 dollars how to pay for and it is stolen comprehensive insurance weres the tell me that I always lie about everything? good student discount to insure, because it s month when I move it somewhere and I with work and will car insurance? Im also be the only person condition of asthma. Can renter s insurance required for no extra things in, Who sells the cheapest they (insurance co) had number for Mercury. They I was wondering if might that might cost? insurance especially since it a life insurance policy 17 year old male no one to help but it helps with ? options are $500, $1000, said they could no credit history. Why ...show be cheaper. You help I havent got a payment . I ve had the best. Please help. be? Also, how much does a No Proof me. Im 17 and Help....My 20 year old have health insurance, what i tried to ask and two accidents, both .
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evaninepercent · 6 years ago
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Lin Yanjun ( Harry Potter AU)
 Lin Yanjun x OC au!
In which Lin Yanjun is a Slytherin and you are a Hufflepuff, but you both fall in love despite your differences
or
You’re a reserved hufflepuff and he’s a sarcastic flirt, but, oh well.
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here’s the hp au i’ve been waiting to write forever
bc im a sucker for hp aus
anyway let’s start the story shall we
so
let’s just say lin yanjun left the biggest impression on possibly everyone on the very first day all of you shy first years stepped into Hogwarts
everyone of you were huddled together, terrified and robes sopping wet bc the giant squid was having a bad day
and the atmosphere was tense and silent
until Professor McGonagall snapped
“ Please be quiet, Mr Lin!”
bc Yanjun was helluva excited on his first boat ride and wouldn’t stop chatting to his newfound friend which you would later know as You Zhangjing
you would expect him to clam up and duck his head in shame
but instead he lifted his head higher and flashed the most charming smile at the older lady and said-
“ you look absolutely gorgeouuss today, professor!”
fyi he would’ve have drained his house from their hard-earned marks if he wasn’t unsorted
but you were pretty sure he was the first student in Hogwarts to use the flirting technique on a professor bc you swore you caught a hint of flush on Professor McGonagall’s pale cheeks
thus everyone immediately dubbed the pretty dimpled asian boy as a Gryffindor
so all of you were shooketh af when the Sorting Hat screamed ‘Slytherin’ at the top of its lungs the moment it touched his head
fast forward to the present
you were a bashful daydreamer of the house of Hufflepuff
and Yanjun was the hopeless flirt of Slytherin
you didnt like Yanjun bc
ugh
he flirts with everybody
his friends, the professors, every single girl he makes eye contact with
you even saw him flirting with Moaning Myrtle once
granted, she probably enjoyed it, but still-
it was also a well-known fact that the first resort to getting him and his gang out of shit was with his flirting
and you even don’t know if its because he’s actually convincing or its just his handsome face doing the work
but it works almost every single time
though, you didnt have personal experience with his flirting until your sixth year
bc you were doing your best to avoid him lmao
but alas
guess who got paired up with you in potions
booM
the one and only lin yanjun
you can only look tearfully at your best friend Linong as he paired up with somebody else
anyway the first few weeks were absolutely terrible
he wouldn’t stop flirTING WITH YOU
“ did someone cast expelliarmus? because you got me completely disarmed.”
as much as Hufflepuffs are known for their cinnamon roll traits
you really wanted to strangle him so he can stfu
cue Linong shooting you worried glances everytime yanjun opens his mouth
and one day you just lose it
“ can you please just shut up? you’re irritating the heck out of me!”
which is really an ouch, but a girl’s gotta do what she’s gotta do
the whole class falls silent bc you?? the shy sweet hufflepuff?? is yelling at the Lin Yan Jun?? gasPP
you were half expecting yanjun to retort with some snarky ass rebuttal but he just stares at you with his wide round eyes and for the first time in history, looks ashamed of himself
“ im sorry, y/n.” he said, twiddling nervously with his robes. “ i didnt mean to make you uncomfortable.”
and the guilt kicks you hard in the stomach bc you didn’t have to be so harsh omg
anyway one Potions class and a deduction of marks from Hufflepuff later ( bc of your misconduct) you dashed out in embarrassment without even waiting for Linong so you can hide in the deepest parts of the library and drown yourself in shame and self-hate
how are you going to face your Hufflepuff friends?? your parents?? lin yanjun??
anxiety at its finest
but just when you’re about to literally entomb yourself in the library you glance up and meet eyes with the person you were abt to avoid your whole life aka yanjun
like holy shit how did he know you were here 
he gives you this anxious look before he scooted closer and sits down right next to you
then he gives you a handful of sugared butterfly wings
his sudden act sorta rendered you speechless and he mistook your silence for anger so he started to grow frantic and was like “ linong said you liked this candy and i just happen to have them but if you don’t like it i can always get you something else-”
you had to spend a whole five minutes convincing him that you were really just shooked bc who knew the flirtatious troublemaker could be so considerate?
and because you were pretty rude too, you gave him a small note of apology and a packet of your favorite toffees from the muggle world
you swore you’ve never seen him smile brighter
after that things turned out for the better between you and yanjun
he didn’t flirt with you anymore and he was actually really nice and soft?? which you didn’t realize before bc you were too blinded by your prejudice
and you even started to like yanjun and the both of you would even hang out occasionally after classes
you even found out that both of you had similar interests, like a passion for trying out new sweets and reading poems
cue you and yanjun scaring the living hell out of everybody when yall consumed pepper imps that one time in the cafeteria
both of you are the power team at potions bc who knew polar opposites could get along so well
you became one of his closest friends and even got along relatively well with his buddies
but ofc how could you forget you best friend linong, who has been by your side and cheered you up since childhood
and because you and linong have known one another for almost your whole lives you were just naturally affectionate with each other
and it just so happened that Yanjun caught Linong and you being really close and his heart just shattered when Linong reached out to squish your cheeks while you grinned up at the taller boy
the next time you had Potions you notice Yanjun being abnormally quiet so ofc you prod at him to tell you why
“ its nothing, really.” he mumbled, busying himself with cutting the ingredients.
“ oh c’mon, yanjun. just tell me!” and after much cajoling from you he finally gives in
“ its just that,” he said slowly, avoiding eye contact, “ you never told me that you and linong were an item.”
you gape at him for like 3 seconds straight before letting out an uncharacteristic snort bc no Linong is like a brother to me and besides?? he ald has a Ravenclaw girlfriend
yanjun is half relieved and half flustered bc there goes his efforts on hiding his 3 year long crush on you that stemmed and only bloomed ever since he first saw you comforting a first year who got nearly got hexed
so he can only just stare at you as he lets the blush creep up his face until you added-
“ besides,” you said, getting your courage from nowhere, “ I like guys like you.”
later on linong would tell you how yanjun’s grin was the literal epitome of the sun and swore to you up and down that he has never witnessed someone’s eyes sparkle so bright
anyhow for that day onwards you both were officially a couple
you relationship= forehead pecks, cringey but appreciated pickup lines, debates on the best Bertie Bott’s Jellybeans flavor,warm cuddles and soft passionate kisses in the library
also you both constantly friendly battle one another on who gets the better score in potions and if any of you are lacking in a certain aspect you would help each other out
throughout your relationship you would find out more endearing things about one another, like how yanjun flirts mainly bc it makes him more confident and also gives him a certain sense of accomplishment and how you cannot really hate someone bc its just in your nature
which really makes you both love each other more
ever since you both started your relationship yanjun stopped flirting as a whole and although Moaning Myrtle would be a little upset she’s actually pretty glad bc she’s lowkey done with all his starry-eyed gaze whenever he looks at you for the duration where she might have stalked him
count on linong and yanjun’s gang to support your relationship from the sidelines
yanjun is there to speak up for you when you lack the courage to do so yourself and you’re always there to have his back when he starts to doubt himself
a couple that would fight for each other
couple goalsTM
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carey-pricemas · 7 years ago
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OMG I WENT TO THE LEAFS GAME AND IT WAS SOOOOOO MUCH FUN I DROVE THREE AND A HALF HOURS TO PHOENIX TO SEE IT AND IT WAS SO WORTH IT EVERYONE SCORED AND IT WAS BEAUTIFUL
I was also literally right by the leafs tunnel so I got to see everyone come on the ice and off the ice and Freddie came out like 15 minutes before and omg he is big!!!! Like!!!! He stretched and everything right in front of me and I was like breathless it was great everyone was so nice to me and it was just overall a great experience :)
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Ahhhh!!! Im so glad you had fun!!!!!! That’s so great!!! BRO FREDDIE STRETCHING PREGAME IS LIKE THE LIFE BRO I DIEEEEEEE IF I GET TO WITNESS IT!!!! My moms used to my screeching to get close enough for pictures that she just sighs and finds our seats for me XD
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Episode 1.1 - This Game is Rigged Against People Who Can’t Read - Vi
The two tribes, Awashima and Hiroku were pitted against each other in a game of Hostile Harai. After a relatively close battle, Hiroku pulled ahead and won a 10% challenge multiplier in the next immunity challenge.
At the immunity challenge, the tribes battle each other in a game of Semantris that led to victory for Hiroku, beating the other tribe even without the score multiplier needed.
At Hiroku, the winning tribe, they celebrated their win and continued to form relationships, though no alliances had yet formed. Emma ventured into the expeditions and found the Awashima hidden immunity idol and was given the option between leaving the idol in place or gifting it to a member of Awashima. Emma opted to gift the idol to Adam with the note: “Can’t wait for merge! (heart) PH.”
At Awashima, bonds began to form and take control of the vote. Katie, Rachael, Rodrigo and Josh in particular began to formulate a plan to vote out Lauren for being the most inactive member of the tribe. Lauren had other plans, wanting to target Adam for similar reasons. After some discussion of idols with Rodrigo, Katie and Rachael opted to vote for Adam as well. At tribal council, Lauren was voted out 7-3 against Adam, who kept his immunity idol in his pocket.
PART 1
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“im either first boot or i win no in between”
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“Omfg VI IS PLAYING I LOVE HER SO MUCH THE LOML. Also nikias has such a cool energy”
“All of my chats so far are with the men, I think I’m too intimidated by the pretty girls??”
“Fuuuuuck Katie is playing?!?!?! 😭😭😭😭 SHES TOO GOOD SHE GOTTA GO”
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“Minding my own business and praying these people never witnessed Svalbard🙃”
“When you rejected Katie for prom and she comes for you in your DMs”
“Katie is gr8. Josh is gr8. Really just vibing tbh”
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“I'm so glad that on my tribe I already have previous good relationships with Regan, Katie, and Vi. Marc is pretty great too. I feel good so far woooo. also prayer circle for Olivia I hope I get to see her in a tribe swap or something”
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After receiving a bonus in the immunity challenge: “guys look at me win!”
“im going to see if i can trick jay into thinking i want to work with him till f2”
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“whyyyy am I so awkward hahahahaha ha ah ha abaaghhhhhhhhh”
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“this game is rigged against people who can’t read. Someone save me”
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Olivia goes on an expedition to Mt. Ishizuchi, where she must climb 100 steps to reach the top. After 15 minutes she completes the task that reveals no reward with this to say:
“Are you fuckin kidding me 🤬 Wtf guys 😐😑”
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“I legit message every single person on this tribe and i tried to communicate with them, however nobody messaged me first which makes me low key a little paranoid. Is it the fact that i am too excited to get to know every one? or could it be that some people feeling comfortable alliance? we shall see, at thee moment i don't really believe there is one or if it is there would be of players that have play together before, but i haven't notice any one who would know someone else in my tribe. At the moment, i have 0 game talks i am trying to talk to people but i don't wanna approach people and make them feel that i am playing too hard too fast so i just wanna get to the first steps of getting to know them and then build of an alliance. I feel like the people that i would like to bring in a potential alliance at the moment would be Olivia, Abby, Zach (so hot btw) and there are people that i wanna work with based on interviews ( Cori and Ally) but they haven't give me anything yet too to make them feel that i could work with them, idk i don't really enjoy being the only one who is asking questions and try to lead a convo and that's why at the moment i haven't be able to see if i could potential work with them. My biggest concern mark is Constance, i enjoy talking with him and he seems like a gamer and i would like to work with a gamer but there is something in me that feels that he could make a move later on very unexpectenly”
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“Ok so I’m doing well with aly, nikias, em, and corinda. Abrielle too but I’m more wary of her bc of her Svalbard connections. Hopefully I can make a ladies alliance happen within the next couple of days naturally. Odd and Sam aren’t giving me anything and Constance is a wildcard bc I know his history”
“Also I forgot to say I also know jay from the other tribe I hosted an org that he won : o. Him and Vi were close so I imagine they’ll be paired up by now. So that either gives me an opportunity to join them as a third wheel or it could take away vi as my potential closest ally. Vi played my first ever org with me :’)”
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Abrielle went to Mt. Tsurumi in Kyushu where she received the voting coin for boiling water 
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Olivia goes on another expedition to the Kojima Shrine. She luckily went during low tide, and was able to claim the Protective Crystal which blocks the next vote cast against her. “Oh fuck yeah”
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“forgot about the great soybean massacre of 1586″
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“So far I feel as though I’ve made some decent connections on this tribe even if they are minimal. I’ve really enjoyed getting to know so many fresh faces but depending on how we do in this challenge, connections unfortunately can not overlook performance as a tribe unless you work it to a certain degree. I do hope that several of my tribe members can help us pull the win for this challenge because I am not doing so hot!”
“The only concerns I have on my tribe are Em and Olivia because they know me from Tumblr and didn’t really like me all that much but I won’t say anything and just let life work it’s course. If I don’t delve into the past and let it linger it’ll only fall into their blame if they use that as their leverage if they target me later down the line. My main goal is to ultimately create friendships in this game and even if they decide to speak with me (Em hasn’t) that’s all that truly matters to me. Because ultimately, I don’t dislike anyone regardless of what anyone says. 💘”
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“Honestly having immunity is really important, we get a taste of the twist be with zero affection towards us and it could allow us to be more prepare in the a future tribal council. Also you need time in this game and especially at the beginning, i am hoping for the win at the moment.”
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“Here u can start seeing Rodrigo in his natural habitat: Forming relationships, talking to people. This is what Rodrigos gameplay is about. He creates relationships strong enough quickly to be able to slip by. Now Rodrigo plans, this season, to take his game one step further and actually transition from a social game only to a strategic game too. Is it too early to rock the boat? We shall see next time in... MYTHOLOGICAL SURVIVOR NO MIKOTO!!! also I find it really funny that I already told like what 5 people I have their back: Josh, Rach, Vi, Katie, Marc. tobe honest this 5 are kind of an ideal 5 for me to align with but with Marc wanting to bring Jay and Reegan idk tbh but the way things are looking it may come down to Adam or Lauren but tribal is only on Monday so theres a lot to play out. Well something else I do feel kinda bad throwing Adam udner the bus to Katie and it really has nothing to do with our past history its just how the convo developed that led to me saying tha”
After being exiled Rodrigo sent this: 
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“I don't like who i'm with. I want to be carried but with almost all new people to me, I gotta try”
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Olivia goes on an expedition to the Sado light house, rewarding her with a 3 hour exile from her tribe. Her tribe is not notified of why she was removed from the chat, prompting speculation about what happened. 
“captain’s log #49. Fred the squirrel has crafted a boat and left the lighthouse sooner than I. I feel defeat creeping over me. I’ve been here for 10 minutes and I’ve tried every which way to let my tribe know I didn’t desert them, IM NOT A TRAITOR. I even changed my pfp in the hopes someone would catch on. Guess we shall see. IM TOO YOUNG TO DIE”
“Catch me taking down notes on who sweetly tried to contact me. That’s who imma vibe with in this game. Constance, nikias, corinda, Abby :]”
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Emma took an expedition to Honshu where she completed a challenge to find the Awashima hidden immunity idol. 
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Chose to gift the idol to Adam with the note: “Can’t wait for merge (heart)! PH.”
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“I JUST REALIZE I CANT BRING OLIVIA INTO MY CHAT AS A GUEST. Life sucks”
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After being given the idol by Emma, his only response was: 
 “PH hmm”
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“also heres a thought. I'd LOVE to get rid of like Reegan next if we go to tribal but the thing is the following: with us voting Lauren this vote I kinda need to play it up for the public. I dont want people thinking I am a meninist. Because I am not. so if Lauren does go this round. I think a MAN will need to suffer the consequences. Its what they deserve to be honest. Peace.”
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“Going great! I got a little advantage and we’re immune. I think im making good connections? I’m trying not to be too much like I usually am like I’m holding back”
Olivia went on another expedition to Lake Kamo on Sado where she broke a fishermans oyster trap, resulting in her being exiled from her tribe until she had collected four buckets of oysters. 
“ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. IM GONNA KERMIT WHAT THE FUCK. I’m literally crying whyyyy. expeditions are the worst fucking thing I’m gonna Kermit IM GONNA KERMIT. CAPTAINS LOG #926 I AM ONCE AGAIN EXILED AND SOBBING AS I HAVE TO FUCKING COUNT OYSTERS WHAT IS THIS CRUEL WORLD WHAT THE FUCK WHY ME”
After almost 40 minutes, Olivia completed the task and was allowed back to her tribe. 
“I don’t even get a reward for all that 😭 I’m just sad now”
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“I have really been trying to up my social game more than any other game I have been involved in. It may seem like a little too much, but at the same time, I really want to emphasize what I said I would do and that is make genuine friendships with people and do what I can in order to move myself forward in this game. Even if it may cost me my opportunity to win, I at least know that I went out of this game knowing I created a connection with each and every person in someway. 
With that said, I think that the idol searching mechanic shows how hard someone is trying to find something because it ultimately catches everyone’s attention if you get something negative like being exiled from your tribe or whatnot.
I’m not quite sure what this game has in store for me and I don’t expect to accomplish much when it comes to challenges so I hope to bring my socially adaptable techniques into my strategy for the long haul.”
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gogularaajan · 5 years ago
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VIRUS MAIRUS
7 mins 40 seconds directed by Gogularaajan written by Shanjhey Kumar Perumal and Gogularaajan dop by Kumanavannan
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Short Synopsis : 
When Neelakandan needs a drink, he will get it no matter what. The short film follows his struggle of trying to score some alcohol amidst the MCO in Malaysia due to the recent outbreak of the Covid-19 virus.
PROCESS :
1. THE BIRTH
We were hunting ideas for the #KumanPicturesChallenge and on 30th March 2020, Shanjhey came up with an idea in our “Sarang Naga” Whatsapp group. He showed us a picture and asked us to guess what the story would be. 
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Picture 1 : Whatsapp conversation of Shanjhey, Palani and Gogu.
It’s a story about an alcoholic middle-aged man and his fearful, impulsive journey in search of alcohol, leading him to lose his mind and resort to drinking Dettol. Once we have this, Shanjhey did efficient writing that contains all the important details and structure of the story. This served as a strong base for us to write the screenplay..
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Picture 2 : Draft written by Shanjhey. I went on with my ugly scribblings on it.
2. THE WRITING
At first, though I liked the idea, I could not connect myself to the story, it took some time for me to finally personalize this idea. A lot of questions hunted my mind: is it necessary to celebrate the life of an alcoholic? what is the urgency? how well do I know this man? will this be a representation?
My energy was almost drained of all these questions, and at the right time, my friend Shoban (a director himself) came to rescue. Shanjhey shared with him our idea, and Shoban instantly loved it. Shoban stressed that this is a story that should be told. That’s when we realized, that the story has its own spark and purpose, and we shall give it a shot. His words started my engine back.
#Philosophy : I tried to make sense of the story. And also draw its relation to suit the Challenge’s criteria which is horror :
what is horror? it might differ from person to person. but to me, it is basically fear. and fear is not just limited to ghosts or supernatural elements. Fear is broad and has many ways to manifest itself. In real life, there are much worse horrors happening, day to day. this story is also such horror, which is way too common in Malaysian Indian's lives. a man who is willing to do whatever to get his bottle of beer might sound too absurd and unreal to some, but it is, in fact, a very common reality for Malaysian Indians. This is in our blood, ingrained, customized for years. This is how we have been enslaved for years by different powers. when we were in the plantations, they gave us alcohol to calm us down and stray us from our real problems. a quick fix that can melt down our need to revolt or claim our rights. and this condition still persists until today, just that it has taken different forms.
this is my fear reflecting on the society, and also the character (Neelakandan’s) fear of not being able to control his spiking impulsive desire.  i think the most horrific thing that can happen to oneself is when one loses control of himself, or worst when something is taking control of his consciousness. 
I also intentionally wanted to stay outside, at the commentary viewpoint, and not indulge. I wanted a comical portrayal of this story. The story itself carried a very absurd, comical value so I didn't want to mess with it. This allowed me to create displaced emotions, where horror which exists in reality, feels humor.
most importantly, i never wanted to have a moralistic comment/statement. i just want to present the characters and events. i tried my best not to judge the character, Neelakandan. I treated him with compassion.
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Picture 3 : Deriving key points of the story to serve as a direction.
After soaking my mind in this idea for about a week, I finally sat to do the screenplay. In fact, I started it quite late, so we didn’t have much time to do many drafts. Initially, Mr.Shanjhey envisioned the movie to be around 2-3 minutes long in duration, but as I was writing, I thought that it will be interesting to follow the character through few more events that can push him to decide for himself. To be honest, the writing was simplistic, I intentionally left some spaces for improvisation during the shoot.
This is the link to our final script used during our shoot : https://issuu.com/gogularaajanrajendran/docs/jpg2pdf
3. THE PRODUCTION
There are no actors. It came down to me to act, damn, I am really a lousy actor. So we tried to ask my dad if he could play this role as he fits the look quite well, better than me. I thought he is never going to accept it because he is quite an important figure in the Malaysian Tamil Literature scene and he has an image to protect. But to my surprise, he said Yes without thinking much.
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Picture 4 : First look test.
For the DOP, I asked my brother, Kuma to take care of it. This was his first time, but I have nothing to complain, his work was neat. So it happened to be quite a comfortable team to work with.
Since I'm dealing with a non-actor, I've used certain methods to drive the character into the actor. On the first day of the shoot, Dad and myself sat in my darkroom. I guided him to breath, in and out, as he settles down into a relaxed state, I brought Neelakandan to him, we asked the character’s permission and seek for his help in filming. I love to do this kind of rituals, it really builds our faith in the story and character. It also gives a certain sacred vibe. I love its purity.
Apart from meditation, I used another important technique which is breathing. I have identified precisely, the breathing pattern that the character goes through in each scene and action, and through guiding the actor with the same breathing pattern, it enables him to realize the character from a deeper reality. 
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Picture 5 : Im pouring F&N Zappel to the glass faking it as Dettol.
Another thing that I’ve done to get decent acting is, we shot this short film really slowly, one scene per day. Really comfortably, because I didn't want to exhaust my dad. We would shoot 3-4 hours per day for 5 days continuously. And by the end of each day, I would edit the footage.
One very valuable lesson that I have acquired is that it doesn't matter if your actor is a good performer or not, if he is attentive and has surrendered himself to the craft, you can mine the talent.  My dad is, in fact, a non-alcoholic (anti-alcoholic even). My grandfather was an alcoholic himself and my dad has witnessed how alcohol can ruin a man’s life. Fortunately, my dad has observed how a true alcoholic would behave and think, close enough. I requested him to draw inspirations from there, and channel it through the way he behaves, looks, and walks. I also collected some interesting videos from the internet (testimonies of alcoholics in India) and let him indulge in the way they exist. 
3. THE POST
Editing this movie was fairly easy, I had a strong vision of its rhythm and flow. The only scene I had quite some trouble was the one in the lift. I almost gave up, I even questioned myself, why am I even doing this. I again, realized that I’m not a gifted editor, editing really drains my soul. But the reality is, every editing project (no matter how simple it is) will push you into a deep dark realm. It is a terrible place to be in, but then, it is just the process. If we keep on, we will survive.
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Picture 6 : Final Timeline of the movie.
I did the editing in quite a rush. I suppose to collaborate with my friend Neroshen on the sound design, but I didn't have the time to send the files over. I end up making the sound myself with my limited resources. The first draft of this film was about 9 minutes, where I intentionally made the last sequence of Neelakandan drinking Dettol longer. I had him to light the candle, kissing the bottle, and glass. It was like a grand celebration after a tiring journey. However, we had to take it out since it was affecting the runtime. In the beginning, I was reluctant to cut it off, but Mr.Shanjhey made me realize that it is better off. In fact the mood was not affected in the end.
Time's running out for submission. Laavanya (sister) and Senthu helped me with the subtitles in the very last minute. Very grateful that we could submit the movie for the competition, I thought that we wont make it.
AFTER THOUGHTS :
Mr.Shanjhey and myself, we are really glad that we took part in this challenge (felt more like a festival! 200+ films submitted!). We don’t really celebrate films enough in Malaysia, and I love Kuman Pictures for that, they really make it a point to celebrate films. This motivates us to practice filmmaking more, because that’s the only way to mastery.
After the selection week, we got to know that our film is shortlisted. Woohoo!
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Link to playlist of shortlisted films :  https://www.youtube.com/playlist…
We shared the movie with friends and families and received warm comments. One of the responses that really touches me is from the Five Flavours Film Festival (Poland) when they made a write up about our short film, and shares how they too, feel connected with the character and story, though they are miles away.
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Link to the write up : https://www.piecsmakow.pl/aktualnosc.do?id=430&fbclid=IwAR2F1BfMG0W6l8MZ4tTfprfU8zf4RG8EzCGCttP0gQgwI-5scpDjktXVwAU
One weird coincident that hit us, weeks after the making this shortfilm is Donald Trump’s statement on ingesting Dettol to kill the virus. Art becomes life, there you go. Neelakandan is validated by Trump.
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And on the 28th of April, Kuman announced that our short film has been selected as the winner for the challenge.
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Some lovely articles and responses for shortfilm from online media : 
1. Trootz made a detailed write-up :
https://trootz.wordpress.com/2020/04/30/virus-mairus-no-virus-can-stop-a-man-seeking-gratification/
2. FatBidin Film Club reacted to the movie :
https://youtu.be/FYarPgjRerE
3.  OhSnap Tv made a cool coverage on their website :
https://www.ohsnap.tv/2020/04/30/spotlight-gogularaajan/
4. CinemaOnline made a write-up :
 http://www.cinema.com.my/bm/articles/news_details.aspx?search=2020.n_virusmairusdiangkat_54619&fbclid=IwAR0STOOLByd7K7o5xUUp3NHd3lSINioJ0xbab-QUYY42xZe2mwJzrr2SBvA
5. Thoughts on Films wrote an impressive review : 
https://thoughtsonfilms.com/2020/05/09/virus-mairus-review/
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mycoveredupfeelings · 7 years ago
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( I know people won't read this as a matter of fact I don't expect them to, I just wanted somewhere to finally share my feelings, I know a lot of people will think they're pathetic and nothing to stress over, god knows the people I have told (my boyfriend and friend) think it's nothing (I guess it is) but it's something that bothers me. I can't really share with anyone else because 1) they'll say it's stupid and fine, 2) they'll see me as the failure (so that rules out family).
I have a burden on myself that Im a failure, it never leaves me. I get jealous of people that are successful and have better grades than me even though I work my ass for them. In college life was finally great for me in the second year I got abcd in my as which I could drop the D and the C well there was nothing I could do, I wish I'd stayed another year and done another a level but I can't turn the clock. The a and the b was ok. The a was in law, the B in English Language and lietature and the C in Sociology. AS only counts as half an A level (which is needed to go to university - the higher the A level the better the university). The second year was better in that I got friends (I was a real loner with bad self esteem issues during high school, I went from group to group, got humiliated, I could talk about it all day but im sticking to this subject). But at the end of college I got the A Levels BBC. No they're not that bad, some would say they're good. But to me it was a massive disappointment. One that kills me Every time (you can laugh and stop reading thinking may be this might be an interesting read and I've actually been through some s*** and that's fine, im just writing this for myself). Because of my grades I never got accepted into the unis that j wanted, well if I got bbb I could have studied at Lancaster law school which was the only one I wanted. Luckily for me I got the uni that I have now (im not going to say it - I just want to remain as anonymous as possible) but im so happy with my uni, despite many never hearing of it. But it's a starting uni and all the time I think im still not good enough for it, they only accepted me for numbers to get it running,I'd never have got it had it been future years and they could finally choose people decent enough. But I thanked god I got in.
Once there I still felt bad about a levels and considered resitting them (people told me not to as it would have been a waste of time, I disagreed.) But while at university I had my first law mock in contract law And I got 70 percent ( a first) and j was so happy, I thought finally it's changing, I'd studies hard and knew what j was going. However when it came to the real thing I got a 58 (which is a 2:2 - a pass but that beat me up the most) it didn't go towards my final degree but I'd worked so hard for it, I understood everything, I couldn't comprehend why I did bad, at the same time I did legal essentials exam and got a lesser score (still a pass and tbh I was glad at this at it was more business). I cried about them after and that just added on to the hate I already felt. Then in tort I thought as this goes towards degree try to forget about the others (which is an impossible task for me) and just put your all in (which I did and I got 61 percent (you need 60 to get a 2:1). Loads of people get higher, and they all still congratulated me but I was so ashamed. I always thought it was all p*** easy, I thought I did incredible answering all the questions, remembering every single case there was, writing pages and pages,knowing every principle, but I was still doing no where near as well as I hoped) and again i cried. The final module was criminal, And I had been looking forward to this as it was something I wanted to go into. For this I got 62 percent (again I cried). So many people were getting 70 percent and 80 percent (firsts), I.simply felt like I didn't belong. I prayed to god so much for a high grade and worked my ass off, but it felt like it was all against me.
Now I am in my second year, I have my first mock for land law and I've promised in gonna well (although I thought I already was). So that sums up part of the reason why I hate myself and wish I wasn't me.
At university theyr3 already talking to us about signing up for training contracts at law firms and doing plenty of work experience and networking with lawyers. This fills me with dread 1) for the reason I'll mention in th3 next paragraph and 2) because I've always felt like a failure and never having any friends -i can't do any small talk, or talk in general. How would I even get an opportunity when I have no idea how to converse with lawyers or anyone (if anyone is still reading - you're probably thinking omg it's not hard just say hi or whatever - and you're right, but for me it fills me with dread.
As mentioned earlier her3 is the second point. During my second year of college I worked at McDonald's and boy was it a nightmar3. I did it as a Saturday job but each time I was treated like utter s*** from the main manager. I wasn't bad at my job, but I was mad3 to feel bad. I was a customer assistant which meant that I worked on the tills but nearly every week the manager would make.me do the cleaning of the tables (no one likes doing that so it felt so demeaning for me to always do it every week - but I never got any hassle doing it so I was glad to do it,actually relieved to, but still it was humiliating. I could never talk to the work force I tried but it always feels like I have to make an effort with people ( which I do) but it always makes me feel well how does anyone get friends because to me it feels like not a single person makes an effort to make friends (not with me anyway). Every week I'd dread when it would be a Saturday, I would spend Fridays not getting any sleep because I couldn't face working there, setting foot in there ( Even though I haven't worked there for 2 years I still can't go in and I still cry Every time I think of it, just like I do with my memories of high school). The main manager would threaten to sack me most weeks and tell me k was s*** at everything. I could never gain the confidence to defend myself with him or anyone,I just took it. He would humiliate me in front of customers and they would look at me like "oh im glad I ain't you" and "I can't believe I've just witnessed that". But I took it and carried on serving even though I wanted to cry right there ( I never cry in front of people,in fact I would smile and nod like "yes sir, of course sir im so sorry sir"). I remember talking to it with my parents ( I never share anything with them because in so ashamed to admit that im a failure but as j was talking I neglected to mention a lot if thing,they'd tell me to stick up for myself,my dad even offered go have a word with "this guy" and my mum told me to defend myself,but as I told them not even the worst of it,the very minor details of it my eyes welled and I looked down (I never cry in public not even let my eyes well but that I couldn't control) they didn't say anything to the eyes welling up luckily. Anyway, as I was going to uni I finally had an excuse to leave the place (you're probably wondering why I didn't leave earlier and 1) I didn't want people especially my family to se3 me as a failure even though they wouldn't have I always feel like they do and 2 I just never had the balls to give in my notice but I finally I did with the excuse "im going to uni" even though I came home every Saturday and could have kept it. He took it off me and when I checked the timetable he reduced my 2 week notice and just gave me one week (he couldn't wait to get rid of me). Anyway because of this,it has made me feel even more of a failure, I cry every time because I feel like if I couldn't even do a job at McDonald's how can I get any other, especially a lawyer.
A job came up at my mum's work and my younger sister (who gets all As got it), I thought she would hate it cos she's a lot like me for personality but she's thriving in it. I could never worj there because i thought I'd suck at that too but this time they would tell my mum about how s*** I am, that I can't take. I can't take my mum thinking im a failure, she's such a strong character, with my sister her colleagues told her to raise her voice "be like your mum", so that example should explain how different my mum is to me.
And finally I've finished.
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thegraytalon-blog · 6 years ago
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Resident Evil 2 Review (Remake)
Overview:
Hey everyone, once again The Gray Talon takes aim, chooses his targets wisely and considers his prey carefully and TODAY we will be diving back into the zombie infested town of Raccoon City as Leon S. Kennedy and Claire Redfield to see how this remake stacks up. Is it a truly a definitive survival horror modern masterpiece on a title that is over 20 years old or is it a cheap knock off for a quick cash grab like other remakes or remasters rather, have done oh so many times in the past since this console generation started? Let’s jump right in and find out! (And once again I will do my best to not spoil the plot.)
Graphics:
It’s 2019 and in this day and age one may begin to ask how much better can graphics truly get? And the answer lies no further than with Resident Evil 2. The new RE engine that Capcom is using holds such weight and presence here that you will begin to pause for several moments at a time as you take in the awe-inspiring meaty visuals on some of the zombies as they begin to deform and deteriorate before your very eyes whether it be from examining their idle corpses or studying and counting the pieces of brain chunks left after taking their heads off with that faithful shotgun or magnum. In terms of performance, I was playing this on my Xbox 1X and honestly it was damn near flawless. The framerate seemed consistent and almost locked at 60FPS for the most part, except during some intense action sequences when it dipped to below 50FPS but that was few and far between. Output on the 1X was a true 4K at 2160p. From the opening sequence to the part where you turn over that zombie’s head to reveal some juicy chunks of flesh to the first appearance of the horror that is Mr. X, the game is a true delight to witness through and through. 
Gameplay and Control:
What happens when you marry the atmosphere, item crafting, inventory management and horror of RE7 with the camera and control scheme of RE4? Sex, people. Pure, simple, unadulterated, prolific and glorious sex is what you shall receive in return. This is quite possibly the most fluidly controlled RE game I have played since RE4 rolled around 15 years ago. The controls are air tight and responsive, allowing you to navigate the eerie police station and lab with ease. The signature shortcut 180 degree snap feature returns in RE as well that they have trademarked over the last 2 decades, where you hold down on the joystick and press X or A to quickly turn around in the opposite direction. A useful tool indeed when Mr. X comes a’ knockin! Now in terms of movement and combat, the game offers you several options. You can opt to simply run away from all forms of zombies and lickers who are trying to chow down or cop a piece of your ass like you’re grade A top choice meat in the mile high club and the only female member of a flight surrounded by ravenous love starved men. Or on the flipside, if you decide to run and gun your way through, might I suggest heavy emphasis on the GUN aspect and light on the RUN. Especially when lickers are present. You want to tip-toe around them and walk on eggshells whenever you see those Gene Simmons from KISS impostors lurking about. When you fire you always want to aim true for their heads, especially on Mr. X, even though shots only stun him, leaving a small window of time for you to run past and make your escape.  In terms of weapons and upgrades, you start off with a simple handgun and have to work your way to unlocking other weapons via key cards or solving puzzles for guns such as the beloved shotgun, SMG, flamethrower and grenade launcher. You can also unlock greater inventory capacity via weapon holsters that are picked up during each separate campaign that makes life a lot easier. And finally, the puzzles are quite elaborate, just as they were from the original RE2 back in ‘98, so be prepared to put on that thinking cap throughout both Leon and Claire’s campaigns as you scratch your head to solve chemistry puzzles and even have to convert binary code to unlock elaborate doors in the lab sections.
Story/Campaign/Narrative:
The setting is 1998 in a small mid-western town of Raccoon City. You’re playing as rookie cop Leon S. Kennedy going to the police station for his first day on the job and/or a 90′s punk rock poster girl, college student Claire Redfield who’s in search of her brother Chris when all of a sudden the zombie T-Virus has just been unleashed onto the town and their stories converge at the police station where the majority of the game transpires.. For a 21 year old game, Capcom has made sure to make RE2 feel all grown up. While story aspects remain the same from the original release, they hired a brand new cast for voice over work as well as recreated most of the way scenes play out, like the first introduction to the illustrious Mr. X. Each campaign is fresh yet familiar and, for example, Leon’s first sighting of him is nuanced and a slow burn in a dark corridor, whereas on Claire’s run, although  you first spot him in the same place, it is in a completely different and quite sudden, fast paced, way. The core of the narrative revolves around Leon and Claire both trying to achieve the same goal of figuring out a way to survive within the confounds of the Raccoon City police station while working separately in their unique campaigns. Things go awry and snowball downward and take them from the police station to the sewers and right to the laboratory where the T and G viruses are made once good ol’ Mr X shows up. And in case anyone hasn’t a clue who I’m speaking of, let’s just say once Mr. X shows up in his trench coat and fedora, you’ll do whatever it takes to stop yourself from crapping your pants suit while fleeing hastily in his opposite direction because if he catches you, well, then let’s just say he will give it to ya! And you’ll go down harder than than a hooker on a weekend romp in Vegas because this dude moves like the T-800 and hits like Mike Tyson. Prison Mike too mind you so stay frosty! Each campaign is about 6-8 hours long, depending on your pace and offers another set of playthroughs on Leon and Claire’s “B” side, which means you will start off in different areas and end up following different routes and pick up different gear at different times, etc. to receive a new and true ending. I suggest you play Leon A scenario first, then go on over to Claire’s B scenario for the final and let’s say, good ending. So we’re talking a total of about roughly 16 hours, over 24 hours if you play through the game 4 times for shits and gigs. Overall the game is heavily story driven and robust, leaving players feeling the true meaning of survival horror along the way as you try and unlock the mysteries surrounding each of the viruses associated with the aloof Umbrella Corporation.
Sound, Music and Voice:
From the sounds of your character’s breathing as a creaking old wooden floor squeaks beneath you as you’re walking down a supposedly empty hallway to the terrifying growls and grunts of the zombies plowing towards you to munch on your no no parts, the sound effects are simply magnificent and remarkable. Sometimes the sound of silence is the biggest star of the show since Capcom does a tremendous job at making the player feel tensed up as they navigate the dark, gloomy and bloody corners of the police station. Just when you think the coast is clear and you’re about to reach that sweet, sweet save room, something unexpected usually happens that may cause you to almost lose control of your game pad and bowels as well. The music is subtle yet effective. The slow paced ambiance of woefully sounding background noises are a nice touch as you traverse the environment, carefully inspecting your surroundings ensuring your survival. The weapons too, when used, sound just as you would expect them. Nothing quite satisfies to the very core like hearing the sound of a shell of a shotgun or magnum blast and watching the zombie’s head explode in front of you like a popping a fat, overbearing zit. Or using the flamethrower and hearing the cracking sounds of fire as your enemies are burnt to a crisp then listening to the residual hissing sounds after you barbecued them like a rack of ribs on the 4th of July. The voice acting is surprisingly well done too. While not a familiarized sounding Leon from previous RE titles, I am glad they got someone who sounds fitting for the role. Fitting in a sense of a young buck who is just starting off in the real world and has yet to earn his stripes, but by the game’s end does so, ten-fold. Claire, too, sounds good and almost a little too surprisingly upbeat for the madness that is commencing around her. The supporting cast also does a great job to display the weighted turmoil surrounding them and the situation that they are all in. 
Replay Value:
High as a kite on a windy March day! I had to literally drag myself on playing through this game a third time. I was infatuated with the entirety this game had to offer. I have not been this glamoured by a Resident Evil game since the likes of Resident Evil 4. There is just so much to go back and do too in terms of getting all of the playthroughs, weapons, upgrades, items and hey, even speed runs to unlock such things as infinite ammo. Who wouldn’t want to barrage Mr. X with a plethora of rockets or grenades to see if you can actually kill that rat bastard? 
Conclusion:
My final score for Capcom’s Resident Evil 2 Remake is going to have to be a 9.5/10. Simply remarkable on all fronts. The video game industry now has set a new bar and new standard for remakes. Other companies are going to have a tough time toppling this undead opus. After you have finally run through both Leon and Claire’s individual campaign’s and the bittersweet zombie blood smoke has settled, what more can I say about this magnificently crafted game, other than why are you still listening to my dumbass for? Go play it for yourself to experience the horror and greatness!
PRO’S:
A beautifully yet horrifyingly detailed world from characters to environments.
Superb story with many terrifying moments.
Rewarding inventory and upgrades.
Satisfying camera and controls.
Tons of replay value.
CON’S:
If only playing one campaign it may be a bit on the short side for some.
A slightly long learning curve for newcomers as ammo tends to run very scarce at times.
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ionica01 · 8 years ago
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Subjective
So I was working on a Karmanami fic (sorry for being so jnactive lately!) but while browsing through ao3 I found a great fanfic for Nakamura x Asano and I fell in live with this ship. Sue me if you want, but we all know Nakamura had a thing for Nagisa but gave up on him because Kayano and her best friend was Karma... So I think these teo really work together! And of course I immediately started writing. The karmanami should be out soon too! "I can't believe that guy!" Nakamura procedeed to complain as she dropped her things on the chair next to hers and let herself dramatically fall into her own chair, stretching her hands behind her back. "And the reason you are telling me this is..." The man in front of her questioned, looking rather amused at his lunch companion. "Because Karma is too busy with his girlfriend to listen to my stories!" Rio sighed, letting her head fall on her arms in a "drama queen" fashion. "So I am simply a substitute." The man concluded rather than asked, smirking slyly. "Oh, stop being such a downer Asano! You shouldbe glad that I'm willing to entertain you with my stories!" Nakamura pouted, grabbing the menu and quickly broswing through it. Asano picked his own menu, covering his expression with it and letting out a small chuckle that he had stiffled for a while now. His friendship with Rio Nakamura was still a mistery. Being in the same class as Karma, Asano was in permanent competition with someone worthy, but this didn't only affect his learning. With time, he and Karma started going for wagers outside the classroom .It was strange, but his relationship with the red-headed wasn't only a competition, but some kind of rivalry friendship, as they came to respect one another and also learn some of their weaknesses. As such, Karma learned that Asano hated strawberry milk ("just one more thing to prove the bastard had worthless taste!" as he claimed) and Asano came to learn that Karma liked to read chemistry articles in his free time ("never thought a man could be so weak to a woman's charms" the former claimed). Another one of the perks of knowing Karma was getting to know all the intersting former 3-E class members he interacted with. Asano took a special liking to those who scored high on the end of second term tests, such as Nakamura and Isogai or Kataoka, who were all open enough to give him a second chance (or mock him whenever he lost to Karma, in Rio's case). The five virtuoses were all rather reluctant at mingling with class E's students at first, but after seeing how their leader gained respect for them, they gave in. As such, Asano's highschool years were filled with learning more about his opponent and his friends. Out of all of them, Asano resonated the most with Nakamura: she was a foul mouth like Karma, and almost as smart as him. Moreover, her resolve to be a diplomat was something he admired and they often discussed topics such as politics and the right way to tackle a sensitive issue. Over the years, they grew as good friends and she started turning to him whenever Karma would be tol busy to plot something with her or listen to her rambles. Of course he wasn't the evil trickster in person, but he did provide her with scary ways to take revenge if ever needed and he could keep a calm head on his shoulders. This time, however, it seemed like she needed love advice. Or at least a way to take revenge on a guy who stood her up. Asano closed his menu after regainig his composer and looked over to his... Friend. The word sounded weird in his thoughts and even stranger when he tried saying it aloud, like it could chocke him. However, it was undeniable that she was a friend. After all, not everyone keeps in touch even when studying oversees and most definetely most aquantiances don't face-time each other just because they are bored. "So, what happened?" He finally asked. "Huh?" She answered as if he distupted her train of thoughts. Looking up from the menu, she exclaimed : "Oh. That. Ughh." She grimaced, closing the menu loudly. "Listen to this! Your friend Ren asked me out!" She pointed at Asano, who looked taken aback by her remark. "Ren did?" "Yeah! Like what, now that he can't make his way to Kanzaki he tries the remaining options?! And I wasn't even the first one on his list!" She puffed, crossing her arms. "He tried Hayami first! But that was taken, too, so he went to Hinano-chan who turned him flat down and THEN to me." She exclaimed uncreduosly. "I was FOURTH on his list! Cand you BELIEVE him?!" She esclaimed, slamming the table with her hand. "Am I a fourth option?!!" She repeated as if it was the most despicable thing on earth. Asano surpressed a laugh: to think someone would get down just because of such a thing. It was well-known that Ren was a womanizer, but it still fazed Rio that she could be so down on his list. Honestly, it fazed Asano too that his friend only placed Nakamura so down on his list. Practically speaking, she was a girl that could bring many advantages: a high income, fluent English that was mandatory in negotiations, as well as a high persuasive power and a flexible mind that could easily find solutions. "Well, you know Ren." He tried calming her down. "He's a womanizer. I don't think he ranks you or anything... He's more impulsive and attacks who he sees." "And he sees me more often than Hinano-chan!" Wrong argument, Asano realised. "So that's not..." "May I take your order?" The friendly waiter asked. "Sure." Asano gave him a buisness smile, internally thanking him for giving him more time to think. After they ordered, an awkward silence installed between the two, as Rio lost her angriness and instead weakly asked again, with a sad vibe: "am I really that bad?" "Oh, come on, Nakamura, don't be such a downer!" Asano used the same line as her with a smirk, which did seem to help make her feel better. "You know as well as I do that Ren's not so much about quality as he is about quantity." He added. "Hey! Are you calling my friends unqualified?" Rio pointed out, but her words were calmer and warmer and she didn't do a good job at hiding her smile, so Asano continued. "Not at all, I wouldn't dare. I am merely pointing out that Ren's ranking is of no meaning." He retailed. "Of course, you are right. But you have to admit that even so, he was a jerk." "I do not deny that fact." Rio giggled. "However, you don't knkw that from me" asano cauciously added. "Did you say something about the womanizer? Oh, you meant Maehara, right?" Nakamura trailed off, changing the subject. For the rest of the meal, the two didn't bring up Ren anymore and they enjoyed their normal time together: politics, work, catching up and talking about how Asano was bound to be a forever alone because all the women were after his money and none of his secretaries were reliable. "Don't laugh, Nakamura! This is a serious issue! I need a competent worker to do his job to get my appointments in order and all I get are silly and sloppy women!" "Because you have a magnet for these kind of people! But I'm sure the allmighty Asano can manage on his own?" She smirked. "Yes of course. But it gives me a headache every time." He sighed. "And that's why I'm here to heal you~" he blonde laughed. 'Heal' was indeed a good word. Asano enjoyed his time with her and never considered it a waste of time. Moreover, she was always capable of keeping up with his work and let his complain. He could let his guard down around her and still feel safe. "I wish you were my secretary." He honestly said. "Now, now! How could I deprive so many women of their wish to get into your pants? I'm not that mean." She laughed it off, but a trail of rose still colored her cheeks. Lunch was over before either of them could notice and they had to go back to their daily routines. "What now?" Nakamura asked as they walked together to the underground subway station. "Meeting with the CEO of a cars' factory." Asano answered bored. He never liked cars to begin with: they made him nautious. "There there." The woman patted his arm with petty mixed with a sly smirk. She knew fully well that her friend hated cars: she had pictures from their last trip to the sea where the driver had to pull the car over for asano to puke. Her and Karma were all over the place taking photos of him (but of course Karma had to erase them because Manami scolded him, no worries: she the pics later). However, she couldn't help but joke: "fast and furious?" "Nakamura." Asano turned to her with a mixed expression: half amused and half serious, "you're getting weaker with your comebacks." "No!" She fake gasped, pointing a thinking finger to her chin: "it must be my Ren-allergy acting up!" She found the diagnosis. Asano laughed a bit, which earned himself a strange gaze from Nakamura. "That's rare." "Must be my being-fourth-on-the-list allergy." He joked. As soon as the words left his mouth, he turned with a worried expression to his fellow, afraid he could have hurt her. To his surprise, she was smiling: "Glad to see you suffer from it too! We are now oficially allergy buddies!" She said, pretending to sneeze. Asano looked at her in disbelief mixed with fondness: what kind of idiot would put this woman on the fourth place? Objectively speaking, she was smart, funny and could always heal headaches. "For the record" he started as they made it to the station, where they had to part ways, as they were going im opposite directions. "You'd be first on my list." That was a subjective point of view, of course. For a few moments Nakamura remained speechless, holding his stare as she stared back at him. Finally, she answered: "I never made of list. But I just ran the possibilities through my head and you win by far." She stated, matter-of-factly. He never expected that: a joke, brushing it off: yes. Accepting the challenge: no. "Are you free tonight?" He suddenly asked. "Got work until ten." She responded with her usual tone. "Can I pick you up at 10:15?" He said again, with a buisness tone. "That's not within working hours" she laughed, nodding. "And for the record" she added as the next train was announced "you'll have to cure my headache because I have a meeting with a French diplomat next and his accent is killing me!" And with that, she got onto the train and left. A fine woman, Asano thought. And despite being subjective, that was a fact for him.
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Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
"Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolutions.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 
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Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
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Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
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My mom was involved in a car accident and she found out her insurance was cancelled earlier. It was her fault and the other driver is insured, but they took away her license. We know she has to pay out of pocket but is there a company that will pay the lump sum for her so she can pay the company little by little?""
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My drivers license and car registration address is at my mothers house which is my permanent address and my car insurance address is where Im living now which is a rental house. Do I need to change the address on my license and car registration? I'm always at my mothers house if it makes any difference. Is this illegal? How would i go about making changes if they need to be done and does it cost money? Thank You!!!!!!
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I'm just moving out of Virginia into Maryland and I am very overwhelmed by the high premiums that I will have to pay oppose to the lower premiums that I was paying for 2 cars in Virginia. Does anyone know a good cheap car insurance company? Thanks!
Car insurance !!!!!!!!!!!!!?
does anyone no were to get cheap car insurance im 17 male and the quotes im getting are 3000 pound to 5000 pound and they are for 1.1 to a 1.3 and its stupid ive tried go compare mon Supermarket and i cant find any lower quotes can anyone help???
Average motorcycle insurance cost for 17year old male ?
How much would insurance coverage cost me? I am going to take the rider safety course. I have no previous accidents and have above 3.0 GPA. I want to get a Kawasaki Ninja500 because I heard they are great for beginners and are decent bikes as well. Any tips, advice, general information would be much appreciated!""
Question regarding auto insurance claim?
Recently, our car got pummeled by a hailstorm. We went to a bodyshop prior to the meeting with the damage adjuster (which is today), and was told by the tech that our car would require both conventional and PDR repair. However, the estimate report was written up today for PDR repair only. Does that mean I'm limiting to PDR repair only? Or can the bodyshop challenges the insurance company's estimate and go for the conventional & PDR repair?""
What is the average cost for General Liability Insurance for a Security Guard Company in California.?
I'm trying to get an idea of how much a 1,000,000,000 Liability Insurance Policy would cost for a Security Company in California""
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Which parent must pay for my car insurance?
My parents are divorced, and live in different states. I live in Florida with my mom, and my dad lives in Virginia, unfortunately. Anyhow, I get my license Feb 4th, and I'm also getting a car, and my mom is forcing my dad to pay for my insurance on top of my child support and various other fees she hits him with. My question is, can I be on my dad's insurance policy even though he lives in another state, or do I have to be insured under my primary possessive guardian(my mom) whom which I live with. Because if not, she is demanding that my dad pay for my insurance, full, a year beforehand, which at my age is close to $2,000. Thanks :)""
Is USAA a good auto insurance company to go under?
have any of u dealt with USAA before? whether it was their auto insurance, banking etc.and how come there are so many in the military that does not know anything about it?""
How do I show proof of car insurance from USAA?
I'm new to buying a car and everything. I'm 19 and a soldier in the US Army. I started an account online with USAA, but have no physical documents. I plan on buying a car in a few weeks. When I go to the dealer and they ask me for proof of insurance. I haven't actually bought a policy from USAA yet. I only got a quote online and I was planning on calling USAA at the dealership and purchasing a policy over the phone. But how do I actually show the dealer my proof of insurance? Can I call USAA and buy a policy over the phone and then have them verify to the dealer that I have insurance? Can all this be done the way I'm planning to do it? Thanks!""
Nj motorcycle insurance?
im 23, male, have a pretty good car driving record (if that helps), but my credit isnt that good. how much (ball park) would it be in nj for motorcycle insurance. im planning on purchasing a bike in the next 8 months and wanna know how much i should expect to pay for insurance. i will get a quote, i just wanna know from you guys a rough estimate. thanks""
Would it cost any extra to put another car on insurance policy?
I was just added to my family's car insurance policy, and was just browsing used cars. If I were to give the person in the policy enough money to buy a car, would it cost them anything extra to put that car on their insurance? They have two vehicles on the insurance currently.""
Health insurance question?
Had COBRA insurance, terminating, looking for health insurance. One health insurance has turned me down. Am on SSDI and have a condition that needs outpatient surgery monthly. Anyone have any suggestions?""
How do car insurance companies determine fault when both drivers are giving conflicting stories? the other dri?
the other driver made a claim with his company. my damage is minimal. do i need to call my insurance company. he is lying and is at fault, but denies it to get his car fixed.from another accident. statements have been made to his company. ty.""
Can I get sued if my son gets into an accident and has no car insurance. He's 21?
My son is 21. He has 2 jobs. He can't pay the car insurance so he has no insurance. Were worried about being sued cause he still lives at home and he's 21 years old in new york state. Are we still liable
How would car insurance companies benefit if the driving age was raised to 18?
And would insurance cost less? please show sources if you can
Is my insurance company liable?
My insurance company offered me a policy to cover a de restricted scooter which I agreed to take out, but in order for this policy to take effect I had to give up 4 months of cover totalling around 160 and pay a 80 deposit on the new policy. Last week I was sent a letter notifying me that my insurance was cancelled so I called them and was told that I had to return a copy of my CBT certificate. I rang on Sunday and was told a completely different story and that was that the company they placed me with had decided that they were not going to cover me even though the whole point of changing them was because they specificity dealt with my type of vehicle . They have now offered another policy for 515 pounds with is 100 pounds more than my previous and I am not willing to pay this as they lied to me and told me that I was insured to ride around even though they knew that I was not covered. I have copies of the insurance certificate to prove that they sold me the policy and all other relating documents. Please advise on what I can do.""
California Health Insurance. 22 living with parents?
I recently graduated from university and have a job, but don't make that much money. I am currently living with my parents. My dad is 58 and makes 55k-ish a year. My stepmom is 60 and doesn't work. My 24 year old brother makes about 12k a year. Both me and my brother are both in debt from school. I can be on my dad's health insurance plan but it's too expensive. I think he claims me and my stepmom as dependents. What are my health insurance options? Any advice would be great. The more details the better.""
Range Rover insurance for a young new driver?
A friend and I where having a debate about whether or not, a new young driver could actually get insured on a brand new Range Rover? We decided to do some research on the subject and we have seen many cases where for example Andy Murray paid 100,000 to insure his Ferrari shortly after he passed his test. Can anyone provide and examples or rough estimates on how much it would actually cost to insure a new young driver on a Range Rover or if its even possible?""
Motorycle Insurance (NY)?
I am looking into buying a bike now, but before i do, i want to know, how much is the average amount an 18 yr old male would pay per month for insurance. I'm not looking for insurance sites that i can get a quote from, since i have not decided on the bike to get so any quote might be off. Any roundabout estimate would be very helpful, plus if u can recommend a bike that wouldnt cost me a fortune that'd be helpful too =)""
How would i go about getting a hypothetical insurance quote?
I haven't even started to learn to drive yet, but just out of curiosity i want to get a rough estimate for insurance for a car that i found, are there any website where i can do this anonymously?""
Car insurance cover note?
Hello. Could anybody please help me to sort out? The thing is that at last I have just registered my European left-hand drive car in the UK. Before that not too many insurers could insure such a car,but I've found AJ Car Insurance company. They sent me a monthly Cover Note until my installments have payed in full, but the last Cover Note has been sent 5 days later then expected,because the insurer just forgot to send it on time and sent it after I reminded them...In fact they left my car without insurance for 5 days ... So can they do so and what can I do in such situation? Can I charge this company for that and how? Thanks anybody who answers my question.""
Term or Whole life insurance which is best for 18 yr old female and what is the difference?
Is $12 per month a good premium for a 30k term life policy for the 18 yr old female?
How much does it cost to insure a 17 year old before he has passed his test?
I am a 17 year old boy who is about to book his driving test. However I want to buy my car now and insure it so that my dad can get in the car with me and I can get some extra practice in. I just want to know roughly how much something like this would cost? As I cannot find any details online, only details on how much insurance is for a person who has passed their driving test. I am going to be buying a Peugeot 107 (1 litre)""
Is it cheaper to have your spouse put onto your car insurance.?
Someone told me it workes out cheaper. Are they correct.
What does it take to fix a flooded car?
Last June, my town fell victim to river flooding. It's caused tons of damage and many cars to be flooded. I'm looking for a cheap car and I got on a rebuildable cars website. I found a newer car that is reasonable on gas and insurance, but is flooded. What would they have to do to fix it and about how much would it cost?""
How much more is average insurance on a sportsbike vs regular car insurance?
How much more is average insurance on a sportsbike vs regular car insurance?
""Which insurance company in Ottawa, ON has the cheapest rates for 17 male G2 drivers?""
Which insurance company in Ottawa, ON has the cheapest rates for 17 male G2 drivers?""
Do I need full insurance coverage to finance a USED car?
I am planning on buying a car after putting like 4000$ down, I want to finance for like 2-3 years BUT I heard I had to buy full coverage which is like 300-400$ for me..(currently I pay 150$ one way) This will be a huge problem. I went to some dealer and a guy working there said it's upto me if it's a USED car, and you only have to buy full coverage for brand new cars. Is this true? I am from Edmonton Alberta, Canada.""
How much would my mom and dad's car insurance go up if I got my license?
Because there not even gonna let me take the test until I find a job,because there insurance will go up. But by how much. I thought it was cheaper if you were a girl, got good grades and went through drivers ed?""
Insurance for first cars?
When I'm 18 an hopefully passed my test I want to get either a VW scirocco, a Peugeot RCZ or a Mazda mx5. But I've been told insurance companies will refuse to insure me because it's my first far so is this true or how much would it roughly cost Thanks""
Why do insurance companies do a credit check. bad credit doesnt make you a bad driver and the same with good?
Why do insurance companies do a credit check. bad credit doesnt make you a bad driver and the same with good?
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
Bat Cave North Carolina Cheap car insurance quotes zip 28710
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/home-building-insurance-quotes-jane-avery/"
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somedaypast-thesunset · 7 years ago
Text
i feel neutrally tired about all of this. you know, i’m not angry or sad or stressed, i’m just kind of tired of this whole routine. it’s become glaringly obvious that this man is very very spoiled and ungrateful. 
yesterday was a fine day. he took me to the farm to get a pumpkin like i asked. he bought me food and was overall really nice and in a good mood - he was focused on pei and the things he would do or need for his trip. i felt comfortable and relaxed despite not even having weed and not having much sleep. 
this morning when we woke up, we had sex and i went about my morning - made a tea, had a smoke and he had a shower. he asked his mother for the survey plans for their cottage in pei so he knew what to prepare for when he wanted to build this garage (the whole 6 month master plan’s goal). she said she would have to look. this set off a chain reaction - he went to look for a crock pot the family owned but he had never used ad couldnt find it immediately, when his mother offered cookig advice he freaked out ad then when she asked him about a few set of chores he was supposed to do, he freaked out again.
at this point i had literally spoken no words from when we had sex. i was just passively floatig throughout the house, gathering my things just to be organized. i went to look at what he was actually making and he said something like “i’m going to drive you home after this i want to do my own thing and i dont want to be around you”. to be fair, he couldve said “people” - i’m ot entirely sure what i heard but it more likely sounded like you. i simply turned around, got my bag from downstairs, got my stuff from outside and walked home. i did not even reply or say goodbye - theres not even a point. like i would get either some argument about how he said he would drive me home or a grunt goodbye; both still equally rude replies. 
but i was kind of proud of how i reacted very immediately and without hesistation. i didt think like ~what would he want or ~whats appropriate to do. i just did what i wanted to do which was leave. it wasnt like oh i think id like to sped the day alone, do you wat a ride home - it was just ‘fuck off’ without being ‘fuck off’. and i don’t deserve that. 
on top of this, during sex he asked outright if anyone else has touched me. not like ~oh no one else ca touch you or ~would you let anyone touch you - just outright ‘have you let anyone’ and its not a light thing. its not joking. if i said yes it would hurt and we’d probably stop. but the parameters he stil puts forth is that he “cant” cheat. but what about me? and why am i used like this? i literally spoke _no words_. 
its very unhealthy. and i dont believe its about me. i’m glad ive come so far in personal relationships that i am able to seperate myself from them and not take things personally.and like i do feel “used” but its not like this is the absolute worst part of it. he said to me, “you havent been around long enough - this is what i do, im excited about something until im not and then i drop everything and go to the next thing” -- as if i havet been witnessing this the entire time weve been together. its all one exciting thing to the next and nothig is ever what its hoped to be. 
and hes very negative. which i guess is a bit ironic coming from me. but everything - everything sucks. and like to its greatest pit of whatever terrible thing it could have. you know - “king of the losers”. acknowledging that “i’m” okay but its really just being on top of a pile of shit. 
its just.. its getting too hard to remain optimistic about a future with him. whatever my life is doesnt affect him nearly as much as his does me. my whole life is built around being available to him and i was okay with this becuse it was like “investing” in a future i wanted to have. or i do want to have. i want a partner. some “family”. but i just dont feel optimistic like this is going to lead to idyllic happiness. not the way he sees it. and why should i spend my time following such a volatile perso who is unable to commit to anything. i guess it was easy to walk away because i thought like - what if i was across the country? what if i coulnt just walk away from this rude person and i was _stuck_? i dont want that and i guess if i dont want that, i dont want him. i’m just... too scared to live with him. like i want to live with him. i reall really do but everything in my being says omg no. no no no no. anyone i told that this was a thing would tell me absolutely do not move across the country with this person. its not like.. dont change. dont live somewhere else. its that this particular person is very ... not the right person to do this with. maybe i need to be a ifferent person too. maybe i need to be a very strong indpendent individual who works super hard and hustles lots of cash an then its all just fun and games and wooo life. but i cannot be dependent on this person. they are not dependable in any way shape or form. they are a fucking prayer. and in order for me to make such huge changes in life i would be very dependent on this person. especially right now. maybe in two years ill be a better version of me but the me right now would need a lot of hand holding an encouragement to make such drastic life changes and decisions. 
if it was plausible to just get a nice apartment in this city together - great. thank you. not even long term, lets just exist with each other before making giant life decisions. thats a marriage. with no commitment. i cant. i just cant. 
and you know - i’m very sympathetic. i know exactly what it feels like. to have no fucking clue what you want, where to go, what to do, who to be friends with, who to have a relationship with - i get it. i’m really confused too. and this is such a shitty time - i dont know if other times have been more shitty but this seems like a pretty shitty time after society going through so many wars in the past 100 years that have grown more powerful under the advancements and like we, collectively, are different people from 50 years ago so what was “right” and “good” 50 years ago is not relevant to today and we are floating without guidance. how do we survive now? weve evolved to a different mental state and we dont know how to nourish this. its like falling into great advancements with no mental capacity to understand their affect on the social psyche. 
theyre right.  the colective “they” - your parents have little to do with your chances. their social standing and coping amongst evolution to bring them to such standing has a lot more to do with your chances but if along the line you figure out your way of coping in evolution then you may rise above or find your own level of “happiness” which is mostly fulfilling basic personal needs. but when evolution continually transitions through different ways to fulfill these basic needs or possibly gives you even more ways to do this, it becomes more difficult to realize how you will find your way to cope in evolution. milennials are realy seen as weak and a joke; like re-branded hippies but focused on mental health and emotions, “refusing” employment to ‘feel better’ in life when there was a time when people just took any job because the only way to cope within that evolution was to exhance your service for money or boarding itself. thats not the case anymore. society evolved in such a way that this generation is capable of fulfilling may basic personal needs sometimes by just existing; perhaps their parents pay for food and shelter and provide them with clothing well into their “adult” years. many older generations started working to SURVIVE at 12 - 14 years old. our generation worked because “thats what you do” or to save up for an iphone. most of our grandparents worked to buy bottles of milk or to help the family or for their own vehicle but why save for one when your parents let you drive theirs anyways?
and again - it’s not the parents fault. it’s now easy in society for parents to do this. a large majority of parents, nd the majority leads the collective society. could my parents? no. but a lot of people around me did have parents that did this and my parents cared for me in other ways. society allowed them to breed children who would become introspective because they were no longer in such dire straits for survival. and older generations are upset about this - dont you know they had to want to die regularly to survive? why shouldt we? 
so as we gain this introspective into ourselves and “new” psychological ideas come up and vast people are “diagnosed”, it becomes harder to accept things which harm our psyche. so we get a big rise in racial inequality and gay rights and things which seem “liberal” but is simply termed this way because some people - maybe a large amount even, could not refuse employment and worked to survive even in this era. that was the generational hand down - exchange your service for money or starve. and theyre not “in the wrong”. other things affect how you build your coping tools - where you live, the climate of politics etc. maybe you realy just had to do that and there wasnt time to invest in this modern evolution of introspection. you dont have time to look within when youre starving on the outside. so this resentmet and bitterness builds between these two sides which may even exist in the same generation but neither of them is wrong. should one work to survive? probably. animals hunt most of their lives. we should probably work to survive. no one can just be handed food ad shelter forever unless you’re a very unique and special person in royalty. and 99.9% of us are not. but should we also kill our psyche? animals dont deal with smart phones and insurance rates and credit scores and bankruptcy. they just go out and take what they want and our society has evolved past this. so we cannot just assume you just work to survive when survival has been complicated. it takes a higher level of thinking which wemay not fully even comprehend at this stage in the evolution. 
i think psychology is very important because we dont understand why people are people. we dont know. we know why the sky is blue but we dont know why we are people. and not just psychology but science and the belief of how our being, our physical being on this planet came to be. we collectively have not agreed despite the very obvious misgivings of current theological theories. 
how or in what way should you survive on this planet? why are we required to exist as we are in this society upon birth. like all of these rules and obligations an responsibilities of being a “good human” are placed on you for the rest of your life and all you did was be born. all you want are basic needs fulfilled but you cant even do that until you acknowledge the land you were popped out on to does not belong to you so you abide by these rules now whether you want to or not. and thats just government and law but on this deeper spectrum its an obligation to be a ‘good child’ a ‘good citizen’ - pay your taxes, go to work, have children, buy a house; these are the quest objectives. but why? i think our generation is not the first to ask why but the first in a very long long time to ask why are we doing it this way. not so much why are we here. many of us have decided for ourselves. but why are we livingin society in this particular way and what can we do to survive in a society which is not designed to really benefit anyone. its not about that homeless man geting up and feeding himself, its about taking responsibility to feed that person. animals do a better job at this and we feel we’re in evolved thinking. 
society has become very convoluted and confused which has bred confusion in its most recent generation. ive lived a very unique life and yet feel the same way abou these things as my peers because the “temperature” of the environment is the same. its hot, we all know its hot an we’re trying to figure out ways to deal whether its running through a sprinkler, going to a public pool or looking ridiculous in a kiddie pool on your front lawn. it’s gross, it’s not a good time, no one wants to do anything and we’re not feeling it. and this evolution is like climate change. there is absolutely still people capable of coping under this stress, farmers still work, lumberjack still cut wood but theyre fucking miserable and they do it because theyre used to feeling like they want to die to survive. but its getting hotter and its getting harder and even though they feel it the only thing they know is to keep working until they cant anymore then die crippled and miserable. being popped out inexperienced and then thrown into a change which even the experienced are struggling with creates a lot of unrest. a lot of anxious and depressed people. 
what do we do? what should we do? you cant change society you can only follow the ebb and flow like flock of birds or schools of fish. this is how we cope as humans, to live as a society. and if society is in upheaval it directly affects the ability to easily obtain our basic needs. 
i used to feel envious of stupid people. like atleast they didnt ~know this shit. because this felt depressing. like being stupi would be easier and id be happier but those who choose to remain ignorant or passive hurt a lot and they struggle through some of the barest traps society has created durig this shitty time and now i feel sorry for them. spinning your wheels over and over, dragging yourself through the mud, throwing away money, living extravagantly and ignorantly but going absolutely no where. not going up, down, side ways - no where. i’m there too. i’m right there too on the train stopped at the station waiting to fucking go and we’re here nd we’re buying shit from the dining car and we’re chatting and excited but we’re not goig and we’re not really sure why and we’re all talking about why we’re not going but we’re still not going but hey atleast hey still got cookies. 
no one person is driving the train either. its like a group effort where everyone on the train has to believe youre moving forward for it to start but if one jack ass thinks youre not, then its a complete halt. 
life is hard but i dont think alot of people realize exactly how hard it is. im trying to learn to appreciate the little things. people with greater minds who had better understanding and less luxuries of the era coped with appreciating little things. taking bike rides in the fall in the nice downtown streets; it’s been a highlight of the season. painting in a studio this week; sure it was not glamorous or anything but i actively went out and created art with others. my room is neat and clean and organized. i did laundry with ease on my own time for free. 
i wasnt upset i “had to” walk home. i apreciated the fall weather & buzz of halloween approaching, time to think without screens of distraction, exersize and activity, the ability to buy cat food & cat litter. im not angry about it. i’m tired of being angry about a train im not really driving. if i can never truly conceptualize what i want because of society why keep trying. why cry over spilled milk. 
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