#im exhausted but it makes sense this time because i did a lot of things

[star-ocean-peahen]

sleepyl

[nexus-nebulae]

today has literally been. its 3 in the afternoon no wait its 5pm wait its 7 no its 9 when did it become midnight????

[cryinggirlnamedhelen]

crawling back to you

part two of promise

a/n: so i lowkey kinda forgot that the timeline here doesn’t really make sense, especially since in episode rin it’s stated that there was at least six months between rin leaving for blue lock and his fight with sae…let’s just ignore that plot hole.

song ; do i wanna know? - arctic monkeys

itoshi rin always worked hard.

he practiced soccer to the point of exhaustion. he never complained about inhuman training times. he never whined about having to wake up at five in the morning every day. he always stuck to whatever meal his nutritionist told him to eat. he always stayed up late analyzing the tactics and strategies of other teams. he was accepted into the prestigious re al at only sixteen, and continued to play for them even now, in his twenties.

his teammates always told him about how insane his sleep schedule was, and how hilarious it was. i mean, he slept at twelve am and woke up at five am! and yet he never seemed tired, never had dark circles underneath his eyes. his teammates always joked about him being a vampire, but rin couldn't care less.

not like he could sleep anyways.

he was twenty two now, but he still had regrets from when he was only fifteen. an unforgettably cold night, where a fuzzy scarf was wrapped tightly around his neck. his brother sae, who he had now made up with in re al, had just insulted and abandoned him the night before. rin got emotional, and he had gotten angry at you, who was perhaps the only person to ever not get mad at him no matter what he did.

but he had gotten you angry as well, and you had ignored him for sixteen days. sixteen. rin was too immature back then, and so he took it as a challenge to see who could pretend that it didn't affect them for longer. but on the seventeenth day, rin had gotten an invitation to blue lock, and he accepted the invitation.

joining blue lock was perhaps the best decision that rin had ever made. he got an offer from re al there, he got on good terms with julian loki and charles chevalier there, he made his largest rival isagi there, he made himself famous there. but at the same time, he couldn't see you there. and after he joined blue lock, he never saw you again. he had dropped out of school to play for re al after all.

now he sat on an airplane back to japan, as he needed to renew his passport. despite constantly being recommended to take business class, rin didn't see the point in spending his money on such a worthless thing. so he took an economy seat; he'll just take some melatonin and sleep the entire flight. hopefully, there would be no one sitting next to him at all and he could just have a peaceful rest for the entire flight. hopefully, no one will bother--

“shit, someone already took the window seat.”

rin snapped his head to the right, where the voice came from. but before he could tell you a quick “sounds like a you problem", his jaw dropped.

there you stood, eyes wide and fists clenched, eyebrows knit together and jaw slack. “rin? what the fuck? why are you…oh, wait, yeah. right. you're still a japanese citizen.”

rin's eyes narrowed. “and you're here because…” rin asked, though it sounded more like a statement to you.

“my friend from college had her wedding here. i just graduated a few months ago.” you drawled, sitting down on the seat next to him, though you scooted as far as you could from him.

“it's been years, and you're still mad at me,” rin pointed out. “that's immature.”

“wow. no hi? no hello? just straight up? orrrrrr you could have apologized years ago and we wouldn't be where we are today.” you ranted, face turning increasingly red. “also, good job on getting into re al. im sure sae was having a great day when he found out.”

rin ignored your remark, eyes of sea glass gazing at you. you've matured a lot. you were beautiful, really. well, you've always been, but perhaps it was the time away from you that made you look all the more perfect. but at the same time, rin felt knots begin to form in his stomach. he wasn't able to be with you for over seven years, in your teenage years, the most important time of your life.

for the first few hours on the plane, it was silent. you were just playing on your phone the entire time, while rin tried to fall asleep. he had forgotten to take the melatonin gummy, and now his mind was full of thoughts of you. but finally, he sighed, and he sat up.

“can i have your number?”

[stevie-petey]

episode five: dig dug

“You like Y/N?” Dustin asks at the same time as you ask, “You like me?” Steve rolls his eyes. “Yeah, barely. She’s on thin ice. But you, little Henderson? You just stole the flowers meant for my girlfriend, so backseat you go.” “Yes!” You cheer, pumping your fist in the air as you flash Steve a smile. “Thanks, Harrington.” He rounds the front of his car and opens the driver's side door. “Yeah, don’t get used to it. Like I said, you’re still on thin ice.”

Summary: you and dustin bury a body and con your mother into fleeing town, great sibling bonding time ! you play hockey with a monster, dustin gets ghosted by his friends, and now it's your turn to kidnap steve (technically dustin does, but you don't stop him) who later gives you some terrifying realizations.

Rating: general, swearing and slight violence

Warnings: blood, use of y/n, fem!reader, animal cruelty technically, weapons, cursing

Words: 7.5k

Before you swing in: hello ! late chapter update, but here ya go lovelies !! lots has happened recently, i got a sick ass job and im super excited and :))) so updates will definitely slow down again some more, but i promise i will update whenever possible. for now, please enjoy !

–

“Remember how angry I was at you about hiding El from me last year?”

“Yeah?”

“Visualize the anger, multiply it by ten, and then take three steps back from me.”

Dustin trips over his feet to scramble away from you.

You’re currently in your own room, the door locked, with Dustin standing several feet away now as he heeds your warning. Never in your life have you felt such rage before, such blinding fury, and you thought you knew what anger was when your dad left.

But this? This is a new type of anger, one you know that only the older sister to Dustin Henderson could ever feel.

As soon as Dart had lifted its head up at you and screeched, you’d immediately snatched your brother’s hand into yours and ran out the door, door slamming behind you. Now, you’re hiding out in your room with no fucking clue what to do.

“You killed our cat.”

“Technically Dart did.” You glare at Dustin. You had actually liked Mews, she was the sweetest cat in the world and a gift for your fifth birthday. Your brother, sensing he’s only digging a deeper hole for himself, coughs. “I mean… Yeah. I killed our cat.”

Stepping back, you find your desk chair against your legs and fall into the seat. Exhaustion sweeps over you. There’s no time to grieve the loss of your cat. Not when there’s a baby Demogorgon in Dustin’s room eating said cat’s corpse still. “What do we even do in this situation?”

“Not tell mom?” Again, you glare at Dustin and he squeaks in fear. “Well I mean, that’s all I can think of right now!”

A headache forms. “I should’ve gone with Jonathan and Nancy.”

Dustin thinks for a moment. “Where did they go, anyways?”

“No. You don’t get to ask any questions right now.”

“Yes ma’am.”

You sigh, a vague idea forming in your mind. “Okay, first we need get Mews out of the room. She was mom’s favorite child, we can’t just leave her in there to be diminished to bones.”

Dustin nods. “Obviously. We can do that… right?”

“We have to. Once she’s out of there, we just… leave Dart in there. At least for now. It’s already late in the afternoon and we need so much help from the party.”

“We can’t tell the party–”

“You’re right. We can’t,” Dustin sighs with relief, but you give him an evil smile. “But you can tell the party. You’ll radio everyone tomorrow, clean the house, and make a plan from there.”

Dustin tries to argue, but you hold a hand up. “You brought a baby Demogorgon into our house. You lost every arguing privilege there is to lose.”

He groans, knowing you’re right. Next time, he’ll be better at hiding things from you because you’re a total buzzkill whenever you inevitably find out.

Together, the two of you hatch a plan. You’ll walk into Dustin’s room first, knives out and ready just in case, and Dustin will follow once the coast is clear. Then, he’ll lure Dart away from Mews’ body with chocolate (you don’t want to ask why), and once he’s gone you’ll snatch your cat’s body and flee the room immediately afterwards.

It’s a good plan.

That is, if it works.

“Ready?” You’re standing in front of Dustin’s door, your knives flicked open in your hand, ready for possible war with a foot long little demon.

Your brother pats your shoulder. “Don’t die, sis.”

“I’m holding knives as we speak. Touch me again and die.”

“I hope Dart eats your face.”

You smile. “There’s my brother. Okay, as soon as I’m inside the room, close the door. Then, when I knock three times, open it again and enter.”

“Wait for two knocks–”

“Three.”

“Three knocks. Right.”

You steady your breathing. Around the corner, you can hear your mom humming to herself as she makes dinner. She has no clue what’s going on, and you envy her for it. Your hand on Dustin’s door knob twists slowly, then, before you can psych yourself out, you turn the knob and throw yourself inside.

Quickly the door slams behind you, so at least Dustin did something right.

Your eyes, which had previously been squeezed shut, open slowly. When you don’t see any sign of Dart, you exhale. So far, so good. You walk towards the couch and find the creature still eating away at your dead cat, which you gag at.

Poor Mews.

You rap your knuckles against the door three times, alerting Dustin to come inside.

He opens the door and walks in, his hands fisted against his face as if that would do anything to keep him safe. You roll your eyes and flick his head, which he whines at. “Grab the chocolate and distract Dart, please.”

Dustin runs over to his desk and grabs a Musketeers bar. When you see the candy’s name, you want to slam your head against the wall. You know exactly why the monster’s name is Dart.

“Let me guess,” you say, your tone mocking. “D’Artagnan?”

“Don’t you have a corpse to collect?”

You scoff at him but step aside so that he can dangle the chocolate in Dart’s face. You watch, alert for any signs of danger in case you need to step in, but the monster seems to be pretty friendly with Dustin. You guess they really did create a bond.

Once Dart is far enough away from Mews, you run over and snatch up her body. You try not to think about the possible cat guts now all over your sweater. That will be a later issue. Like a lot of things in your life recently.

“Go, go, go!” You push Dustin towards the door.

He doesn’t need to be told twice, throwing the last piece of the candy bar at Dart’s face and running out the door right behind you. Once you’re both out the room with the door closed, you both lean against the wall and exhale deeply.

“Good job. Now onto phase two.”

Dustin makes a face. “Why do I have to distract mom?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you hold up Mews’ bloody body. “Do you want to be the one to hold our dead cat?”

“Good point, I’ll go distract mom.” Dustin leaves, rounding the corner to go hopefully distract your poor mother in a sane way. With your luck, Dustin will spew some weird bullshit that will only make her more worried than she already is.

Right on cue, you hear Dustin say from the kitchen. “Mom, I think I broke my arm.”

The scream of fear your mom lets out would’ve been comedic had you not been holding her beloved dead cat.

Your mother runs around the kitchen, fretting over your brother, and the second she isn’t looking, you slip out the front door and quickly throw Mews’ body into your bush. You feel a bit bad about that, but there’s nowhere else to hide her body in broad daylight.

When you walk back inside, Dustin is being swaddled by your mother. “What did I miss?”

“Oh, Y/N!” Your mom sighs. “Dusty said he thought he broke his arm, but the silly boy seems to be okay.”

Dustin pats her back. “Ha, right. Silly me!”

Your mom looks up and then squints a bit, eying your sweater. You look down and your heart drops. It’s covered in Mews’ blood.

Fuck.

“Y/N, what’s that all over your sweater?”

“Paint!” You say while Dustin sputters, “Ketchup!”

“We… Were painting with ketchup.” You lie, sending a quick glare your brother’s way. Out of everything red, why ketchup?

“Oh, alright.” Your mom looks uncertain, but doesn’t say anything else about it. “Well, dinner is almost ready. Why don’t you go wash up, honey?”

The second you’re dismissed, you run into your room and yank the sweater off. You’ll burn it tomorrow. First chance you get.

A few seconds later, there’s a knock on your door before Dustin’s head pokes inside. “Dinner’s done.”

“Great. Holding your dead cat definitely works up an appetite.”

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” Dustin tries to play it off, but you see the genuine upset in his eyes. He hadn’t meant to hurt anyone, and you know he loved Mews too.

You sigh and walk over to him and kiss his curls. “It’s okay. Next time, let’s not hide a monster from the Upside Down, yeah?”

“Deal.”

–

Dustin spends the night in your room, which you explain to your mom as needing some “serious bonding time”. She tears up at this, unaware of the fact that you’ll be making your brother sleep on the floor as punishment.

The next morning you and Dustin hatch yet another plan: get mom out of the house. Before you two can do anything else, you both agree that your mom cannot be anywhere near Dart. Plus, she’s already noticed Mews’ absence, so it’s only a matter of time before she finds the body in the bush.

“Alright, you’ll fake the phone call while I start gathering the supplies.” You tell Dustin while your mom calls for Mews outside. She’s at the bottom of the driveway, Mews’ favorite toy in her hand, shaking it around, unaware that the cat’s dead body is in the bush next to her.

“Got it. You remember where my old hockey suit is?” You nod at Dustin’s question, and he’s about to say something else before he sees your mom start walking back towards the house. “Shit! Game time, go!”

Dustin fumbles for the phone and you run to the living room closet. Just as you’ve entered your positions, your mom walks through the front door.

“Mewsy! Dusty, Y/N, sweethearts, you’re sure she’s not in your rooms?”

“No, mom.” You shake your head at her.

Holding up a finger, Dustin presses the phone to his ear and motions for the woman to remain quiet. “Uh-huh. Thank you so much, Mr. McCorkle. Thank you so much, you are a true lifesaver.”

You can’t help but roll your eyes. He’s laying it on pretty thick.

“Alright, this was great. Thank you, have a good one. Bye-bye now, all right. You too.” Dustin pretends to hang up the phone and smiles at your mom. “Alright, great news!”

“They found her?” Tears of joy lace your mother’s voice. You have to turn away, you know she’d notice the discomfort on your face. It feels horrible to be lying to your mother like this.

Dustin seems to be thinking the same thing, because he lowers his voice and gently approaches her. “No, but they saw her wandering around Loch Nora.”

More tears flow down your mom’s face. “How did the poor baby get all the way over there?”

“I don’t know, lost I guess. But they’re gonna look for her, and–and Y/N and I will stay here, just in case they call again. Right, Y/N?”

“Right!” You call from the closet, now quickly grabbing everything you can think of. Would a hammer be necessary?

“And you’re gonna go help look. Yeah?” Dustin’s only response is a relieved hug from your crying mother. “Yeah, give me a hug. Go get her!”

Your mom quickly composes herself and grabs her glasses. She presses a kiss to your forehead and seems to be in better spirits. “We’ll find her!”

“Mews will be home soon, mom!” You cheer, and your mom blows you another kiss.

“I love you,” Dustin sends her a thumbs up.

“I love you, kids.” And with that, your mom clutches her purse to her chest and sends one final kiss your way before shutting the door behind her.

As soon as the door shuts, you and Dustin scramble. Dustin heads to the backyard to open your cellar doors and you grab the remaining hockey gear from the closet. While you drag the uniform out to the living room, your brother begins to look through the fridge for any possible bait.

“Think Dart would like bologna?” Dustin calls over his shoulder as he digs around.

You groan, dropping the heavy goalie pads. “Last I checked, he wasn’t my secret Upside Down pet.”

“Touché.”

Dustin grabs the bologna and starts making a trail from his room towards the front door. While he does that, you start sorting through your own pile of gear, soccer to be specific. Dustin liked hockey, you preferred warmer sports. As you’ve finished lacing up your cleats and shin pads, Dustin returns.

“Okay, the bait is all set up. Got my hockey stick?”

You hand him what he needs. “Here, and your helmet is on the couch.”

Dustin gets ready and you retrieve some oven mitts from the kitchen. When you hand them to the boy, he looks at you like you’re insane. “What? Extra protection. Can’t hurt.”

He sighs and swipes them from your hand, putting them on. Once he’s ready, you help him stand up. He looks ridiculous in his old hockey gear, but you suppose you don’t look any better with your shin pads and Dustin’s spare shoulder pads.

“Alright. We all set?”

Dustin pats his helmet. “Ready.”

You walk towards his room, and once you’re there, Dustin pushes past you and bends down a bit so he can speak through his keyhole. “Alright, Dart. Breakfast time.”

“Do we have to mention breakfast right before we set him free?" You mumble, but your brother ignores you.

Slowly, he reaches towards the door handle and then flings it open. As soon as the door has been moved, Dustin practically knocks you to the ground in his haste to escape. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!”

His mantra reminds you of Steve’s from last year at Jonathan’s. Seems like the two boys have something in common: they’re idiots.

You follow quickly behind Dustin, terrified but at least trying to hide it, while your brother just repeats “oh my god”, and “shit” over and over again as he stumbles over the bait and out towards the front door.

If the situation wasn’t so grave, you’d be giggling at how dumb Dustin looks waddling over bologna on the floor. However, Dart could very well be right behind you, so you run after the kid equally as terrified.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit–”

By this point, you’re nearing the tool shed outside.

“I will push you down these stairs Dustin Henderson.”

Dustin shuts up and, as soon as you’re inside the shed as well, locks it behind him. Once he’s sure you’re all cleared, he lets out a breath of relief. “Okay, now we wait.”

You walk towards the wood panels, squinting as you peek through a gap to see outside. “I don’t see anything.”

Dustin does the same. “Come on, I know you’re hungry…”

Everything remains still outside, and you’re starting to worry that maybe Dart doesn’t like bologna after all, until you see his scaly body walk out the door. He gobbles down the bologna pieces one by one, which you cringe at.

“Yeah. He likes bologna, alright.”

Dustin silently cheers. “Yes! Yes, yes, yes!”

Dart makes his way down the trail, eating every piece he finds, and soon he scampers down the steps and hovers over the cellar doors. In an odd way, the little guy is kinda cute if you forget about the fact that he killed your cat.

“Yes, yes, yes!” Dustin continues to chant as you watch Dart. The creature just has one more piece of bologna left, he just needs to take a few more steps inside before you can slam the doors shut.

But, because nothing can ever be easy for you, Dart suddenly turns and looks straight at you and Dustin. “Shit!”

You flinch back, knocking into a bucket of nails that spill everywhere. “Shit again!”

Dustin tries to shush you but you grab him by his shoulders and force him behind you. Your knives are out, their blades gleaming in the sunlight that creeps through the wood panels. You peek through them to find Dart slowly approaching the shed, his mouth almost watering.

“Well, this isn’t good.” You take a breath to lessen your fear. “Stay here, I’ll try to distract him–”

“AHHH!” Dustin shoves you against the opposite wall, your body flinging back with a harsh crash, and breaks through the shed’s door. With one solid wack from his hockey stick, he flings Dart into the cellar.

“What the–Dustin!” By the time you make it out the shed, your brother has flung himself on top of the cellar doors, panting.

“Got him,” he informs you, as if it isn’t obvious enough. Dart begins to screech with anger, and Dustin sighs. “I’m sorry, you ate my cat.”

“You’re an idiot, Dustin.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just give me five seconds to catch my breath, please.”

–

With Dart safely locked away, you and Dustin are able to finally bury your cat.

It doesn’t take long, but the early November heat is just warm enough to make you annoyed as you dig through the soil in your backyard. Dustin has his walkie with him, trying to find the right frequency so he can call the party and inform them of what’s going on.

“Guys, this is Dustin again. Does anyone copy?” You stab at the ground with your shovel and your brother groans when he gets no response. “This is a code red. I repeat, a code red!”

Sweat trickles down your brow and honestly it should be Dustin burying the cat, but you’ve never learned how to radio the party so you just sigh and throw more dirt upon your dead cat. Dustin tries a few more times to contact the party, but no one responds.

“Damn it!” He shouts, frustrated.

“Language,” you huff out, more sweat forming.

It goes on like this for a while, Dustin trying and failing to reach anyone, as you two begin to clean the house of any blood and Mews guts. He tries again while you guys grab the cleaning supplies, then again while you’re on your hands and knees scrubbing his carpet in his room.

“Alright, it’s Dustin again. Seriously, I have a code red.”

“Maybe they don’t know what code red means?” You offer, your nose scrunched up due to the bleach fumes.

Dustin scoffs, “sure, and they also don’t know who Luke Skywalker’s father is–”

Suddenly Erica’s voice comes through the walkie. “Can you please shut up?”

“Erica?” Dustin stops scrubbing and straightens up. “Erica, is Lucas there? Where is he?”

“Don’t know. Don’t care.” Erica has always been such a lovely girl.

“Is he with Mike?”

“Like I said, I don’t know and I don’t care.”

You and Dustin share a look. It worries you that Mike hasn’t been responding all day. From what you’ve heard and seen, he’s spent every day this year camped out in his fort in the basement trying to contact El with the radio frequencies.

It’s not like to Mike to just disappear.

“Listen, Erica.” You speak up, trying to sweet talk to the girl. You’ve babysat her a few times and you’ve even managed to convince her you’re kinda cool, so maybe she’ll respond better to you. “Did Lucas mention anything else? Maybe… Maybe like a girl he went to see?”

Dustin frowns. “A girl? What–” You shush him and wait for a response.

Erica snorts. “A girl? Please, as if. He’s been gone all day. That’s all I can tell you.”

Your brother closes his eyes and sighs. “Please tell him it’s super important. Please tell him that I have a code–”

“Code red?” Erica interrupts.

“Yep, code red. Exactly.” Dustin smiles, then covers his mike to whisper to you, “seems like she likes me more than you–”

“I got a code for you instead. It’s called code shut-your-mouth.” Then, Erica switches off the walkie.

Dustin stares at nothing, dumbfounded. You go back to scrubbing the carpet, a pleased smile on your face. “So, you were saying?”

He’s quiet for a few seconds, processing the fact that clearly no one in the party will answer, before letting out an obnoxious groan. “Damn it!”

“Are you gonna help me clean, or–?”

“Can’t you just call Jonathan?” Dustin asks, grasping at straws. “Maybe he can be useful for once and help.”

You shake your head. “No, he’s out of town right now with Nancy.”

“And you’re okay with this because…?”

“Because,” you roll your eyes, “they’re on a secret mission to take down Hawkins Lab. They’re at some detective’s house right now, so I have zero way of contacting them.”

Dustin rubs at his eyes tiredly. “How did we get stuck with a cat eating baby demogorgon while Jonathan and Nancy get cool spy work?”

You pinch his leg, causing him to wince and move away from you. “Because you purposefully hid the baby demogorgon. Any other stupid questions?”

“Sure,” Dustin throws his hands up in defeat, obviously joking when he asks, “got any other friend we could call for help?”

A sarcastic laugh escapes your lips and you’re about to tell him that he has more friends than you’ve ever had, but then a thought occurs to you.

Steve.

Technically speaking, you’re friends. Well, sort of. Sure, he had wanted space yesterday in the lunchroom, and yeah he’s still mad at you and things are awkward at best between the two of you, but still…

He’d been at Jonathan’s house last year, he had fought by your side and saved your life and even bought you a vending machine full of snacks. If anyone else could understand the situation you’re in right now, it’s Steve.

You hesitate though. He still seemed really hurt at lunch, but you also saw the way he lingered even after dismissing himself. He doesn’t hate you, at least not really, and without Jonathan or Nancy to call, he’s the only person you have left right now.

It can’t hurt to try, at least.

“Actually, yeah.” You respond after a minute or so. “Be right back.”

Dustin asks questions as you head towards the living room, but you don’t respond. If Steve doesn’t answer, then you can make up some lie about the phone being broken or something to save yourself the embarrassment.

Your fingers press Steve’s long remembered number. He had given it to you his first week of visiting you at Bookstrordinary, assuring you that you could call him whenever. After a while, you took his word on it and started calling the boy every time you were bored and alone at work.

The line rings for a few seconds, and you bite your lip in anticipation.

This is a horrible idea, and yet your heart flutters when Steve answers with a groggy, “hello?”

“Hey, Steve.”

“Y/N?” He sounds surprised.

You can’t blame him, he did quite literally yesterday tell you he’s still upset with you and that he needs space. And yet here you are: calling him early on a Saturday afternoon. “Yeah, it’s me. Listen, I really need your help–”

A sigh. “Normally I’d love to, but I’m kinda in the middle of getting ready to go to Nancy’s.”

“Nancy’s? Steve, she’s not even home–”

“Can we talk later? I… I’d really like to talk, if that’s alright with you.”

This throws you, and for a second you forget about the reason you called. “Of course we can talk, Steve.”

“Great,” you can hear a smile in his voice, which warms you. “I’ll see you later, then.”

Then you remember Dart and the blood on Dustin’s carpet and you frantically try to stop Steve from hanging up. “Wait, no! Steve, Nancy isn’t home and I really need you to–”

The line goes dead, and you slam the phone down. “Damn it!”

Dustin, hearing the commotion, wanders into the kitchen. “Take it the call didn’t go well?”

“No, it did.” Sure, Steve didn’t necessarily offer his help, but he did tell you where he’s going to be in about twenty minutes. You’ll ambush him there and demand he listen to you and help. As a bonding exercise, of course. “We’re going to the Wheeler’s.”

“Why?”

“Steve’s heading there.”

Dustin trips over his shoelaces. “Steve Harrington?”

“Long story,” you sigh, dreading that you’ll have to explain all of this eventually. “C’mon, let's get our bikes.”

–

You and Dustin get to the Wheeler’s before Steve does, which makes no sense to you but whatever. He’ll be here soon enough and you’ll ambush him with all your charm and maybe a bit of groveling. You’re not beneath it, if you’re being honest.

Dustin goes up to the front door while you stay behind, keeping an eye out for Steve. Ted opens the front door and while you can’t hear what he says to Dustin, you know he’s unamused by his presence. The father has never been your favorite parent within the group, honestly.

You watch as they exchange a few more words before you see Dustin sigh and angrily march back towards you. Then, right as he’s grabbed his bike, a familiar red BMW pulls up. Just seeing his car makes your heart skip a beat.

The car parks and a frazzled Steve steps out, carrying flowers and mumbling to himself. You aren’t able to hear everything he’s saying, but you can hear the words “what the hell am I sorry for?” and your stomach twists.

So clearly he’s not in a good mood. Still.

The flowers, which you now can see are roses, hang by Steve’s side as he fixes his hair. He hasn’t noticed you yet, and it takes everything within you to pull your eyes away. He looks good today, too good.

There’s a monster currently locked in your cellar.

“Steve!” You rush over to his side.

He does a double take when he sees you. “Y/N? What are you doing here?”

“Well–”

“Are those for Mr. or Mrs. Wheeler?” Dustin now joins you two, pointing at the roses in the boy’s hand.

Steve looks between the two of you. “No…? You’re Dustin, right? Y/N’s brother?”

Dustin snatches the roses out of his hand. “Good, and yeah, I am.”

“Hey, what the hell?” Steve looks at you for help, but you know there’s no use trying to reason with your brother. He’s in a mood, similar to Steve, and you just sigh and follow Dustin. “Hey!”

“Nancy isn’t home.” Your brother informs Steve.

“Where is she?” Steve asks, and you hit his shoulder.

“I tried telling you over the phone!”

Dustin claps his hands at you to get your guys’ attention again. “It doesn’t matter where she is or if you tried to warn him, Y/N. We have bigger problems than your love lives.”

He’s at Steve’s car now and opens the passenger side door. “Do you still have that bat?”

Steve whips his head towards you. “Bat? What the hell is he talking about? Y/N, what are you guys doing here–”

“The one with the nails!” Dustin interrupts, exasperated.

Again Steve looks at you. “Why?”

“You’re not gonna like it,” you confess, and this only makes Steve feel worse.

“We’ll explain it on the way.” Dustin goes to sit in the passenger seat but he’s quickly stopped when you grab his hood and yank him out.

“No, absolutely not. I deserve the passenger seat, not you.”

Dustin slaps you away. “I got here first.”

“I was born first–”

“But I was literally about to sit down–”

“Hey!” Steve shouts, effectively shutting you and Dustin up. “It’s my car, and right now I currently only like Y/N, so she gets the passenger seat.”

“You like Y/N?” Dustin asks at the same time as you ask, “You like me?”

Steve rolls his eyes. “Yeah, barely. She’s on thin ice. But you, little Henderson? You just stole the flowers meant for my girlfriend, so backseat you go.”

“Yes!” You cheer, pumping your fist in the air as you flash Steve a smile. “Thanks, Harrington.”

He rounds the front of his car and opens the driver's side door. “Yeah, don’t get used to it. Like I said, you’re still on thin ice.”

He says it with annoyance in his voice, but you can see the smile he’s trying hard not to let slip, and you feel giddy. Steve obviously can’t be too mad at you if he wanted to talk later and is willingly letting himself be kidnapped by your brother.

Dustin, on the other hand, can’t believe any of this is happening. As soon as you’re all in the car he asks, “Since when did you two become friends?”

“I have a life outside of you and the boys, you know,” you tell him, but you avoid Steve’s gaze. It’s not like you intentionally hid this aspect of your life from Dustin, but… It also never came up, either.

“Sure ya do, but… Wait,” Dustin remembers something. “Oh my god, you have Steve Harrington’s number memorized?”

Your face heats up and Steve hides a smirk, but you see it anyway. You ignore his smugness and respond to your brother. “Like I said, I have a life outside of you.”

Dustin gapes at you. “I have so many questions–”

“I have an even better one: where am I taking you guys?” Steve asks, and suddenly you remember everything at stake.

“My house,” you tell him as you buckle up. He nods, although with some confusion, and then starts the engine. “You know how I called you earlier?”

“Yeah…?”

“Dustin, why don’t you tell Steve here what you found.”

Your brother sighs from the backseat. “A few days ago I found this… lizard of sorts.”

“A lizard.” Steve says, unimpressed.

“Oh, just wait,” you quip.

Dustin turns his head to glare at you and you give him a thumbs up. He scoffs at you before carrying on, “Yes, a lizard. I named him Dart and he was super cool, okay? I thought I had discovered a new species and that I would be super famous and better than everyone else.”

Steve glances at you next to him, raising his eyebrows and whistling low. “Wow, does humbleness run in your family, Y/N?”

“I’d say so, yeah.”

“Anyways,” Dustin interrupts, ignoring Steve’s laugh at your response. “Turns out, Dart is from the Upside Down.”

“The Upside Down?” Steve asks, extremely confused. He looks at you again in the mirror and it hits you that no one explained to him the events from last year. You assumed that Nancy would’ve, seeing as how they’ve been together for a while now and Steve had been with you guys at the hospital the night you brought Will back.

However, from his disbelief and confusion it’s clear that she hasn’t. If you had to guess, Steve probably went home that night and blocked out everything that had gone down with no questions asked.

You respect his repressing skills, honestly.

Dustin groans, beginning to grow impatient with Steve. “Yes, the Upside Down. If you have the bat still, how could you not know–”

“Do you remember that… thing we killed at Jonathan’s last year?” You cut your brother off before he can get too mean. You love the kid, you do, but he isn’t the kindest person when others aren't understanding him.

A dark look passes over Steve’s face and his fingers tighten around the steering wheel. It’s night now, and the atmosphere in the car becomes tense. “I remember.”

You clear your throat, “Well, this creature–”

“Demodog.” Dustin corrects from the backseat.

“Demodog?” You turn in your seat to face him. “That’s what we’re calling it now? Seriously?”

He shrugs. “It’s a baby Demogorgon, it looks like a dog, so… Demodog.”

You pinch the bridge of your nose. “Alright. Okay. Whatever, this demodog is from the Upside Down. It’s this parallel universe, basically. Creepy shit happens there, and last year a monster–”

“The Demogorgon.” Dustin once more interrupts.

“Dustin, if you want to catch Steve up then for the love of god, please shut up.”

“Sorry,” he mumbles, embarrassed.

A smile tugs at Steve’s lips and you take a deep breath to calm yourself before continuing. “Look, I don’t know how much Nancy told you about that night at Jonathan’s, but all that you need to know is that the Demogorgon took Will last year and we had to fight it in order to save him.”

Steve nods slightly as he follows along, “Nancy mentioned something about a monster at the hospital… she told me it’s what killed Barb, but never told me it had a name.”

Another silence falls between you guys in the car. The mention of Barb brings back bad memories for you both. You had liked Barb, she had always been nice to you, you guess. Hawkins is a small town. Everyone knows everyone, and in the end the smallness of the town is what makes the Upside Down so hard. You lose people close to you, one way or another.

And as for Steve… The roses he bought for Nancy lay wilted in his backseat.

Dustin shifts uncomfortably in his seat, and your heart pangs in understanding. He misses El, and you do too. The closer it gets to the anniversary of her disappearance, the more you miss the sweet and caring girl; but you know that the boys, Mike especially, haven’t given up hope for her.

“So…” Steve motions for you guys to continue explaining, and Dustin sits up in his seat to begin again.

“So flash forward to now: I didn’t realize Dart was a demodog until he grew like three damn sizes bigger than when I found him. Y/N and I almost died trying to lock him in our cellar.”

“Wait, you guys have a cellar?”

Dustin rubs his face, “That’s what you focus on, Steve?”

“It’s a valid question–”

“Guys!” You lurch yourself forward and wave your hands around wildly to break up their bickering. “We really don’t have time for this. Can we please just focus on the task at hand? Dart has probably grown even more during the course of this stupid conversation.”

Your brother’s hand pushes your shoulder back so that you’re now once again sitting, and you swat him away with annoyance. “Y/N, I’m trying! Blame Steve, he’s the one asking stupid questions–”

Steve speaks up, “What the hell? They aren’t stupid questions–”

“Well…”

Steve shoots you an offended look, “Y/N, I thought you were on my side.”

Dustin scoffs, hurt. “She’s my sister, you idiot!”

“Again, we seriously don’t have time for this because, once more: Dart is getting really big.” Your voice is louder this time, and thankfully it shuts everyone up. Then, just because you can, you add, “and I’m on Steve’s side right now. He’s the one with the car, plus… Well, I owe him.”

Steve fist pumps the air. “Suck it, little Henderson.”

“Do not call me that,” Dustin threatens him, then turns his attention to you. “First Jonathan, now Steve? Can’t you befriend anyone I like?”

The mention of Jonathan gets Steve attention. “Wait a sec, where is the guy? You never actually told me where he and Nancy went, Y/N.”

You sigh, knowing there’s no use keeping anything else from him. He’s already driving you and Dustin home to help with Dart, and you did promise to tell him where they were later, but life seemingly got in the way. “They’re playing detective right now.”

“Detective?”

“Yeah, the guy Barb’s parents hired… They’re currently at his place, exposing Hawkins Lab.”

A tense silence follows. Steve stares straight ahead, eyes on the road, as his expressions morph from hurt, to reluctance, to eventual acceptance. “Nance didn’t think to ask me to join?”

His voice wavers, just a bit, but you hear it. Knowing that Dustin is watching from the back, you decide to forget any possible boundaries for once and grab Steve’s hand. He’s hurting. The car smells of roses and there’s no girl to give them to. “She tried, Steve.”

He swallows. There’s hurt in his eyes and you want to reach out and stroke his cheek and tell him that it isn’t his fault. “I know…”

“Ahem,” Dustin coughs, clearly uncomfortable with whatever is going on. “So… Back to Dart.”

You clear your own throat, but your hand remains wrapped around Steve’s, who nods. “Wait a sec, how big are we talking?”

Without meaning to, you close your eyes and brace for Dustin’s witty remarks, but he surprises you by answering with a demonstration and zero mockery. “First it was like that,” he opens his fingers a few inches before using both hands to show about a foot in length. “Now he’s like this.”

Steve still looks doubtful. “And you’re sure it isn’t some weird lizard?”

A headache begins to form and you pinch the bridge of your nose again. “It’s not a lizard, Steve.”

“Well how do you know?”

“Because his face opened up and he ate our cat.” Dustin says bluntly.

This seems to shut Steve up and he nods his head in defeat. It’s silent in the car for the remainder of the drive, and just before Steve parks in your driveway, he looks over at you and sees your eyes closed in pain, and before he knows it he squeezes your hand and says, “sorry about your cat, by the way.”

Despite the pounding in your head and your utter exhaustion, his words make you laugh. “Just park, Steve.”

He smiles, feeling proud for getting you to laugh, and does as he’s told. Before you know it you’re standing at his trunk, staring at the baseball bat that saved your life last year. Dustin has already gone over to the cellar, waiting for you and Steve to follow.

The bat stares back at you, and you shiver as the memories come back. Though you had tried your best to forget that night, that entire week, honestly, it’s been useless. The nightmares still haunt you. You obsessively research trauma in children now to compensate for your own guilt from last year.

“Why’d you keep the bat?” You ask as Steve grabs it, giving it a practice swing. Your own blades are out again and he eyes their gleam.

“It’s kinda sick, don’t ya think?” He swings it again. “I look badass with it.”

He’s dodging, but you sense that he kept the bat for the same reason as why you kept the switchblade. You’ve been waiting in fear for something else to happen. “You don’t look too bad with it.”

Steve blushes a bit, which your stomach flutters seeing. “I, uh… Guess we can’t have that talk tonight?”

“No, not unless we somehow manage to deal with Dart in a timely manner. However, if I recall, nothing ever goes our way.”

“Nope!” He closes the trunk and tosses you a flashlight. Then, he sticks his hand out for you to shake. “But for now… Truce?”

You giggle. “Truce.”

His hand is warm, and even though you had just been holding it in the car moments earlier, his touch still fills you with a gooey warmth that you’ve come to associate with him. As soon as you and him are alone, away from Dustin’s nosy ears, you’ll really apologize to Steve. He may be being nice to you now, but he’s still guarding himself from you.

You hate it. You miss how open he used to be with you.

“Ready to go re-live my nightmares?” Steve asks.

You give him a thumbs up as you start heading towards Dustin. “Always, let’s go.”

“Took you guys long enough.” Your brother mutters when you and Steve arrive at the cellar, weapons in hand. You flash him an apologetic smile while Steve simply ignores him.

Steve approaches the door and listens for a second, “I don’t hear shit.”

You frown and listen as well. He’s right, it’s eerily silent. You shoot Dustin a questioning look and he shrugs as well, “He’s in there.”

“Duh, I know that much, You almost knocked me out when you shoved past me to get Dart in there.” you remark, before softly adding “he’s gotta be in there.”

Your words don’t reassure Steve, who begins to use the tip of his bat to bang against the locked doors. When nothing happens, he bangs harder against them before sighing in annoyance.

“All right, listen kid.” Steve begins, and you start to rub small circles into your scalp in a vain attempt to lessen your headache, because you already know that the next words out of his mouth will start yet another fight. “I swear, if this is some sort of Halloween prank, you’re dead.”

“Steve…” He ignores you and stares down your brother, shining the flashlight directly at his face in what you assume is meant to be a threatening manner.

“It's not a prank,” Dustin tiredly replies, squinting his eyes against the light. “Get it out of my face.”

Steve complies, still hesitant about the situation at hand, and turns to face you. “You got a key to this thing?”

You nod and fish the keys from out of your pocket and unlock the cellar doors. Steve bends down to investigate, and without him having to ask, you hand him the flashlight and step forward so that you’re next to him.

He flashes the light down the stairs and all that the three of you can see is darkness. An uneasy feeling creeps over you. Something isn’t right, but you really hope that you’re wrong.

“He has to be further down,” you say, more so to reassure yourself than the others.

Dustin shuffles his feet next to you and says, with an extremely unconvincingly “brave” voice, “I’ll stay up here in case he tries to… escape.”

Both you and Steve look at him in disbelief. Dustin stands his ground, however, and looks at the two of you expectantly. Steve shakes his head while you sigh in defeat. Your brother is such a pain sometimes.

“You do realize that if Dart eats me, you’ll have to deal with mom all by yourself, right?” You ask him.

The boy shrugs at you. “That’s a risk I’m willing to take, Y/N.”

“Yeah, love you too.” You mumble, before you begin to follow Steve down the steps.

“I’ll be thinking of you!” Dustin calls out, his voice echoing against the cellar walls.

You trail behind Steve, and the flashlight he brought does nothing to illuminate the dark area, so it’s a relief when he reaches above his head to turn the light on. As your eyes adjust to the light change, you scan the room to find the missing demodog. However, all your eyes land on is a long, thin sheet of film on the ground that you can only assume is molted skin.

“Oh, shit…” you breathe out. “This isn’t good.”

Steve picks the skin up with the tip of his bat and examines it and shakes his head. “Please tell me this isn’t Dart.”

“Actually, it’d be easier if it was him.”

Steve doesn’t laugh at your joke; he continues to look around the room before his eyes widen. You turn your head to see what’s caught his attention, and when you spot the problem, your knees weaken.

There’s a giant, Dart-sized hole in your cellar wall.

“Steve? Y/N? What’s going on down there?” Dustin’s voice carries down to you guys, and you and Steve share a nervous glance.

“Dustin…” You call up to him, your voice weaker than you’d prefer. You wish you could be braver for him at the moment, but right now it takes everything within you not to crawl into bed and shut the world out. Why did it always have to be giant monsters?

While you’re reeling, Steve walks over to the bottom of the steps and flashes his light at Dustin, instructing him to come down. Once the boy has joined you guys, Steve guides the light to his bat so that Dustin can see the skin.

“Oh, shit.”

“Funnily enough, that’s what your sister said, too.”

Then Steve shines the light to where the hole in the wall is, and you watch Dustin’s face go from concerned to horrified. “Oh, shit!”

The three of you crouch closer to the hole, and when Steve shines the flashlight through it, your heart stops and you gasp, “It’s a tunnel.”

“No way…” Dustin says in awe.

It’s hard to see exactly how deep the tunnel goes, but something tells you that there’s more to it than meets the eye. This wouldn’t be some simple fix like you had desperately hoped it would be.

Now you really, really wish Jonathan were here. And Nancy. Definitely Nancy.

But they aren’t. This time, you’re on your own with only Steve and Dustin by your side. No one else in the party is available, you don’t even know where they are or if they’re even safe, but right now that doesn’t matter.

What matters is that Dart has escaped.

And it’s happening again.

Everything you’ve tried so hard for the last year to ignore, to move on and pretend never happened to you, has come crashing back into your life.

Steve, seeing your apprehension, grabs your hand and pulls you in close. “Hey, we’ll figure it out. I’ll be here, okay?”

Even though you don’t deserve his kindness, his sincerity, you believe him.

-

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[norman-fucking-reedus]

HE ATE MY HEART!

“I love that girl”

gif by @corvidcrossbow

IM SO FUCKING EXCITED TO FINALLY HAVE SOMETHING TO POST ON HERE AND ALSO TO POST SOMETHING TO THIS SONG

Vamp!Daryl has rotted not only my brain but the community. I am not sorry at all for the plague I'm spreading and I hope that it only gets worse.

So I've been doing some research on it, and I really like the idea of mixing the Blade universe w TWD, I did some more research on the different types of vampires (its kind of a lot so if you want you can go read abt them here!) To basically summarize, there's people, daywalkers (half vamp-people), walkers, full vampires, and then Revenants (half-walker half vampire, basically just another way to die)

This also makes it easier for whenever Scud becomes my next vampy victim

AUUUGH I NEED MY HOT SEXY NEEDY VAMPIRE MAN WHO JUST WANTS TO DRINK ALL MY BLOOD SOMEONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE FUCKING PLEASE

also I am working on reqs yes I am, I have one scud fic that is dirty and nasty and should be getting posted soon. also I may not be on tumblr as much as I used to be because GUYS I am now employed yes that's right I got off my computer, went outside, interacted with people, and got a job #gangshit

It had been over a week since Daryl had eaten, and over two since he had left to go out on the community's monthly supply run.

As he stumbled through the opening gates, he felt like he had been through a war. His body was wracked with exhaustion, weakness, and hunger. The air was thick with the strong scent of blood, and he couldn't keep himself from groaning painfully when he was bombarded by Carol and Rick asking where he had been, what had taken so long, and if he was alright.

“No! M’not alright dammit” He barked at them in frustration after being asked for the third time if he was alright, his voice laced with irritation and discomfort. Carol couldn't help but notice his pale and clammy appearance.

Her forehead creased into a frown as she tightly pursed her lips, giving Daryl a scolding look that made him uneasy. With a tone of concern, she asked, "I'm worried. When was the last you fed?"

The man's face twisted in discomfort as Rick and Carol stood in his space. He scoffed and muttered, "Not recently, m'fuckin' starvin'" The longer he stayed, the more his head spun and his vision blurred, causing the corners of his eyes to fade into a deep red color. His stomach churned uncomfortably, and he could feel his teeth starting to ache.

Rick observed Daryl's malnourished skin, staring at how he was almost transparent. His eyes were screwed shut as the sun harshly burned his sensitive orbs, and he was gripping the strap of his crossbow so hard that his fingers were starting to turn red.

"You should go see Y/n," Rick said, eyes fixed on his friend. "She should be back home and she's been asking about you. I think she misses you." Daryl's body tensed at the sound of your name, and a sudden chill ran down his spine, causing goosebumps to rise on his arms. He tried to hide his reaction, but Rick's sharp eyes didn't miss a thing.

Daryl's head drooped weakly as he could only manage a feeble nod. Rick and Carol had stepped off to the side for him, offering their silent support. Carol placed her hand gently on his shoulder, her grey hair falling across her face as she did so. Rick, with his stern expression, gave Daryl a look that he knew meant there was no room for argument.

His senses were already heightened to an extreme level, almost at an overload as the sun was abnormally bright, blazing down on him with a blinding intensity, making it difficult for him to even keep his eyes open. He could feel the heat searing his skin, causing beads of sweat to form on his forehead and trickle down his face. He noticed the way that his vest rubbed uncomfortably against him, the fabric clinging to his skin and making him feel sticky and irritable. His already aching teeth began to grind down against each other, and he could feel his razor-sharp fangs digging into the tender skin of his bottom lip, further fueling his pure discomfort.

Each step he took in the direction of your house was tiring and heavy, his dirty, muddy boots slapping against the ground as he dragged himself through the streets, promptly ignoring any strange or judgy looks that were thrown his way. He didn't have the time, let alone the strength to even bother paying them any mind. His stomach churned as his overwhelmed nose couldn't help but pick up the sickeningly sweet smell of blood.

It forced him to quicken his pace, trying to get just as far away from the public eye as he possible could. He didn't want to be looked at, didn't want to be stared at. He just wanted to get inside as soon as fucking possible and just tear off all his goddamn clothes. A ping of hope struck through him when he could see your familiar house only a short distance down the road, having to hold himself back from flat-out sprinting the rest of the way there.

Though it was only about a thirty-second walk, it had been the longest in his whole entire life, and walking up the small steps of your porch was like something out of a nightmare. He could disgustingly feel the material change in flooring when he stepped off the pavement and onto the creaky wood, the sound grating against his now way too-sensitive ears. Dear god, would someone fucking help him already?

Of course, as if on cue, the red front door to your house swung open, but instead of being met with a friendly face, he was met with the barrel of your gun.

"Daryl?" You questioned as you lowered the weapon slightly, a smile stretching across your lips once you had confirmed who was standing and dicking around on your porch. "Daryl!" You fully dropped your defensive position, stuffing the weapon in the band of your pants as you prepared to throw yourself at the man, halting when you finally took in his ruined appearance.

His breathing was labored, and it was hard to keep himself upright on his own two legs, forcing him to lean against the wall by the door. "Hey doll"

You scoffed at him in disbelief, "Don't you dare even "hey doll" me, mister! What the hell happened to you? Get in here right now" Grabbing the front of his vest and pulling his heavy body inside, Daryl groaning as each movement caused pain to his body, slumping against the door when you slammed it shut.

He couldn't be happier when he felt you prying the buttons of his stupidly itchy vest off, him shrugging it off as well as his crossbow, clattering down on the floor and probably chipping the metal further.

"Jesus Daryl, you look fucking terrible. Did you feed on anything at all out there?" You purse your lips as you analyze and checked his unnaturally pale chest, letting out a surprised hiss at the burn lingering on your fingers tips from where you had brushed them against the skin of his shoulder

Daryl groaned as you directed him to sit on the couch, the short steps from the front door already leaving him utterly winded, almost dripping in sweat as he wheezed each breath of air.

“‘Wasn’t much… ‘wasn’t much out there” He spoke breathlessly, head spinning and his stomach loudly churning when you stood in front of him.

When you extended a hand out to cup his face, he tightly gripped your wrist with a shaky hand. “Don’. Please don’” He didn’t want to feed from you, not like this, not in a state where he couldn’t guarantee that he wouldn’t absolutely drain you.

“Daryl” You whispered softly, frowning slightly as you started taking your shirt off, and he wanted to scream at your stubbornness.

You straddled his lap and gently brushed the hair sticking to his forehead off, his blue eyes starting to tint red as the smell of your blood was strong, right in his face. “I don’ wanna”

“I know you don’t sweetheart, but you’ll die. What am I gonna do if you die?” You cupped his face, forcing his gaze onto yours. He whimpered slightly at your touch, his whole body sensitive and reactive.

Daryl shivered when you combed fingers through his hair, hands curling around your hips when you directed his head to your neck. “I trust you, more than I even trust myself” You whispered soothingly into his ear, and he almost wanted to cry.

He could smell the blood coursing through you like it was a burning candle, and his mouth was uncontrollably watering. His fangs were sharp and heavy, aching with the need to sink into your skin, which is exactly what he did, groaning against you at the first drops of blood, not wasting against another second before he was greedily taking mouthfuls.

It was so good, so warm and fresh, sweet and bitter. Daryl had drank lots of blood before, and yours was easily his favorite. He craved it during his time out there, not just because there was a serious lack in wild animals, but because it was addictive.

He squeezed your hips, soft and pillowy in his buzzing palms as he could feel himself starting to get hard in his pants, the more blood he swallowed the more drunk he got.

It made you feel good to watch his natural tan color fade back, his scarred back no longer a ghastly pale. You ran your fingers through his hair, occasionally curling your fingers and gripping the dark locks to grind down against his now-straining cock.

Daryl made soft, small sounds as he fed, each roll of your hips making each gulp of your blood taste so much better. His senses were at an all-time high, overwhelmed and at an absolute edge. He couldn’t help the way his hands pressed you down on his cock, hips desperately jerking against you as he could feel himself getting closer and closer, his head spinning in a blood lust haze.

He was so close, so very fucking close. His sharp claws had made themselves known, and you jolted when they painfully curled into your flesh, hips sputtering and slightly faltering in their movements. Daryl had no problem picking up the slack, almost fucking you right through his pants from how hard he was rutting up into you.

It was just all so much, his whole body on fire with pure arousal as he sighed around a final mouthful of crimson, trembling from his core as his orgasm washed over him, pressing your clothed cunt against him as hard as he could, making his already fuzzy mind draw a complete blank, a loud groan tearing from his throat that caused his fangs to slip out from where he had punctured the skin and drop his head against your shoulder, whimpering softly as he held you down.

You scratched his scalp comfortingly, feeling a little woozy from the amount of blood he had taken. He hummed against you as he started to come down from not only the high of his orgasm but bubbly buzz from his feast.

“Feel better?” You asked in a quiet, sleepy voice when Daryl’s tongue cleaned the drops of blood that had leaked from the small wounds, coating the area in his saliva so that it could heal.

He nodded as peppered you in appreciative and apologetic kisses, pulling you flush against his bare chest by wrapping his arms around your back, claws retracted and replaced with blunt nails. “M’sorry fer hurtin’, ya”

“Instead, you should be sorry for not feeding yourself, mister” You said as you shook your head, pinching his side as you got a bit upset again. “You know it scares me shitless when you do that”

“I know, I know. M’sorry for tha’ too” Daryl grumbled, feeling fatigued as well now that his tummy was full and satiated. His body was still weak and needed rest, now yours did as well considering he had taken a lot more than usual. “I’ll make it up to ya’” He said as he pushed himself up off the couch, grunting as it was a lot harder with tired muscles and one hand keeping his woman wrapped around him, adding a second once he was finally standing.

You giggled at that, arms hooked around his neck. “And just how will you do that?”

“Got a real good idea” Daryl smirked, hoisting you up as he ascended up the stairs to your shared bedroom, hungry for something else that was much better than blood.

I started writing this a few days ago I think this is the quickest I've written something

Vamp!Daryl is an absolute need. I'm loving every single post I see of him and I love watching the disease spread faster than fucking covid I jump for joy when I see someone I don't even know talking abt him is this what fame feels like is this what its like to be famous am I fucking famous

yes you do want more of this so go read more

Bloodthirsty @dixons-sunshine

Bite me @mydearestdaryl

[mako-neexu]

all guda related stuff in mahoyo collab

summoning as a highly complicated magecraft -> highly intact sense of self, magical energy, magical crest, sheer willpower........you who is light and equally dark....

casual comments/banter to the people they trust

guda getting shocked of all things at a talking bird www

gudako -> young girl that likes to jog every morning

gudao -> brat that likes small time candy store sweets

UGH the further emphasis on Servants being familiars that no one - not anyone should just use (exceptional...)

stressing the role of a 'Master'

'I also make mistakes a lot'

"I still don't see what's so special about summoning."

guda screams during summons? lmao kind of reminds me of mash with lord camelot

the way guda just refers to other people as 'that another human' www (i know 'person' is more accurate but to me it sounds like an alien in disguise calling someone as 'fellow human' ww)

Of COURSE guda knows how to stop their own pulse

disbelief. perhaps gut feeling. guda's perception of death to others. (i guess in the face of unnatural they would doubt it. but considering Id chapter, it would depend on the person and how theyre closest to?)

'more like tobimaru' 'more like soujyuurou' getting angry on behalf of someone without letting it show as well... i Understand.

THE TOPIC OF AGING KILLS ME. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU ARE HESITANT????? dont yokuwakaranaina ME????

Don't face world-ending disasters alone

IM CRYING OH MY GOD IM NOT WELL "did you sleep well?" "i slept peacefully because the night was quiet and nice" AUGH GUDAAAAA😭

probably nothing of note but additional descriptor to guda is that they look like a college student as compared to previous descriptions of being 'high school student'.......

not being good at horror stories 🥹 reminds me of summer 5...

(unwell) i forget about guda's tactical prowess sometimes (lies) + guda's mention of the looking glass reminds me of berkercas valentines...

Subtle but gudao's reaction to beating down kashin is 'exhausted or relieved' meanwhile for dako she has the 'doubt' in her dialogue

subtle again but theres a hesitance to guda when asked about what the future looked like. but their second option is saying "eh there arent any flying cars anyways"

ahh okay now i know the crypto stuff guda said. its from gudao. is this MHX's influence lmao. gudao youre advertising crypto seriously? ww

guda casually joking about the times they astral project out of their body likes its nothing and mash is not normal either of course and treats it as regular occurrences. well, its regular but for a normal average person in the 21st century, it certainly isnt ww

GUDA ONCE AGAIN PROVING that despite being 'camera' for us players, they actively hide information and i am not over that fact. (knowing who the culprit is before most of the rest-)

guda not hesitating at ALL to rayshift back to 1999 where the end of the world was supposed to happen www

Ah!! To encourage kinomi in confessing, guda confessed their own out in the open!!!

A bakery with the one they love / A wish to reach the South Pole

You may not be able to have all of your dreams, your nights be peaceful, but I hope that you will still be rewarded at the end of your journey 😭

[realhotgirlshitah]

https://www.tumblr.com/realhotgirlshitah/770698535437041664/also-listen-listen-his-ex-gf-like-with-all-her

NOW THATS WHAT GETS ME- I feel like BECAUSE of his ex gf, he’s been more like “guys go vote!” “Vote blue!” Like does he acc care or is this to like restate his image???? Idk Jack’s just weird bro. Him having weird gfs T-W-I-C-E. Like if it was a mistake the first time, then ya did it again pal! 😭 ALSO, I had no idea Josh’s wife was a trumpie, that feels like it reinstates Jack”s “vote blue” shit is just performative…like if he broke up with Haley bc she was a trump supporter, and still like acted all liberal, but still fw Josh and his wife, then ain’t it really all just performative??? And people are really arguing and being like “hey Jack isn’t a homewrecker bc there’s no home to wreck! ain’t wasn’t a marriage” SHUT UP BRO 😭 IF A GIRL WAS TRYNA GET WITH HIM WHILE HE WAS IN A RELATIONSHIP YALL WOULD DRAG HER UP AND DOWN THE CURB.

Another thing I will say is that I don’t think that him being liberal is super performative considering the fact that his mother has always openly been a leftist who advocates for women’s, lgbt and poc rights! She also has taken Jack to a bunch of rallies and educated him on these topics which he has been open about way before haley as well which is super important to note.

HOWEVER… I do believe that the people you surround yourselves with is a good representation of what beliefs you hold which is what has me so split. Haley and Hayley, support shitty causes which wasn’t a good look for Jack but there’s also still people like his mother, Romeo and Willa that hold and represent very different beliefs.

Also Josh himself I do believe is a liberal but it’s just his wife that ms questionable. Very important to note that he’s quite high profile personal trainer in the industry who was hired to work with Jack since he was 14 so to me it makes sense why they haven’t been cut off or kicked to the curb. Contracts aside, Josh has been a big brother/father figure to him through an integral period of his life and career so that’s another thing I’m split on. It’s still fuck Josh for encouraging a relationship with Haley in the first place but overall it kind of makes it make more sense that Jack gravitated towards her so much

The whole thing with Inde is a whole mess though and weirds me out. If Jack homewrecked, that’s very odd of him and im huge believer in how you get someone is how you lose them when it comes to cheating so I guess we’ll see.

But the way a lot of his fans have approached this, is SUPER odd to me. I’ve seen the stuff of Duncanyes insta and though I see where they’re coming from, their content, commentary and stuff said by their moots puts me off. For them and a lot of other Jack stans, it’s way too parasocial and very unhealthy. I cannot stand when people believe that celebrities owe them something just because they’ve shown them support. I would definitely hate if I was in that situation and people spoke about me as if I owe them my entire career and obedience. Yes fans are the reason why celebrities are who they are but I genuinely believe that acknowledging and appreciating the support they’re given is enough. The issue is so many fans are stuck on the belief that they’re entitled to controlling their fave’s life and that they must upkeep that image of them they’ve created in their head. Trying to find the balance as a celeb must be exhausting especially at such a young age.

I think Jack is a good person and overall means well, he’s made a couple of mistakes but it’s so easy to make assumptions and it’s normal to feel a sense of disappointment. For me that’s why more than anything you’ll see me wrote content about his character, particularly Ethan, as opposed to him

That’s not to say I wont write any Jack content! That lil white boy is FOINE. But like i said, Im not one for feeding too much into parasocial relationships with real people and expecting complete perfection from them

Thanks for yapping with me though anon! I love you REAL BAD 😌😌❤️

[bonnieura]

You should tell me your favourite JFK facts because I find your posts very interesting /nf 🐇

This has been sitting in my askbox for so long so here we go🫡 not gonna list my favorites but rather as much as i can remember while typing this

jfks eyes are green ,not blue contrary to popular belief! many official documents confirm this which you can easily find online

when not wearing shoes ,jfk had a fairly noticeable limp; because one side of his body was smaller than the other! This included his legs as well (left to be specific iirc) and this is more noticeable in childhood photos if anything

Tied to the fact above ,its also why he had to often wear lifts on one pair of his shoes

Speaking of shoes ,jfk's back pain was so terrible that it reached a point even tying his shoelaces was difficult for him. the chronic pain was genuinely debilitating! he was notorious for his health (or the lack thereof) where at times he'd be made to use crutches bc even walking became hard for him. Literally could not get out of BED on some days bc he was so exhausted and his body hurt .. and people get so surprised when i tell them this

Ive talked to u abt this in ur dms before but he also wore glasses when cameras werent around!

back in the 60s and the decades before it wearing a blue tshirt under a suit or anything of that sort was considered as bold and unprofessional as was wearing any other color like green or purple for ex. It wasnt until the early 60s where they began becoming more normalized— and this is thanks to jfk! he popularized blue tshirts in America after being seen with them on multiple times on addresses and public appearances. Whats interesting abt this is the reason rumored behind it and its that he was inspired by james bond 😭 whose actor wore blue shirts multiple times on film. Im nott exactly sure how true this is but he was pretty big james bond fan anyway so 😭😭

jfk's nickname for jackie was 'kid' and jackies nickname for him aside from jack was bunny

many sleep physicians heavily suggest that jfk had hypersomnolence. In other words that he was really sleepy 24/7 😭 which he indeed was! which obviously couldve had many reasons but the main one is the fatigue that came from his addisons disease— its one of its largest and most common symptoms. that and the exhaustion that wouldve probably come from his like 10 other chronic illnesses 😭 not even as a symptom. Just dealing w that shit is tiring if that makes sense. + Couldve been a side effect for medications he took

speaking of sleep, he was an incredibly light sleeper! the smallest noise would immediately wake him which sounds like hell honestly

he took so many pills and medications a day it's genuinely concerning and even above that. Something that always surprises people is the fact he took antianxiety medication + antipsychotics i think too? But definitely for sure antianxiety and for that reason a lot of specialists think he had GAD but i personally wouldnt say if he did or not

since we're on the topic of meds he was so self conscious of his appearance bc of them😭 since the steroids he took puffed up his face every now and then (moon face) he was always wary of how he looked especially especially his weight. He had such an unhealthy fixation towards it youre well within your right to say he had some form of ED especially with everything else we know abt his eating habits. The one thing he couldn't travel anywhere without was a bathroom scale theres no way thats normal

jfk liked to trick on the secret service now and then. He loved going out with any one of his boyfriends late at night to watch a film only to come back even later— all unbeknownst to the secret service 😭 theyd frazzle and look for him everywhere .. and of course theyd eventually find him anyway giggling with whoever guy he had gone out with that night. The ss would attempt to talk him out of it ,warning him of his 'night outs' dangers but obv it did not go through to him

speaking of night outs .. after JFK moved his friend Lem Billings into the whitehouse (becoming the first 'friend of the president' to live in the white house) he would stay for entire nights in his room and do sleepovers sometimes its so dumb. Jackie didn't enjoy this aspect of their relationship at all cause no matter how close you are to your friend you dont just sleep in their room for nights at a time .. especially with everything else they did

jfk was a. below average driver 😭 he liked to drive by himself but he was far from the best at it. He'd be trailing off somewhere in his compound and the ss would be following behind just in case

jfk hated hated i mean LOATHED being touched 😭 this one especially shocks people bc of the rumors regarding his sex life and wtv but he genuinely felt so uncomfortable when people touched him nonsexually. Even the closest people to him as well.. to the point that it took Jackie the final few months of their marriage to finally break through that wall and have him feel safe and comfortable enough to let her touch him. He would literally pull away if you as much as placed your hand on his shoulder according to lem in a source i cant find rn

he and jackie had to sleep on separate mattresses due to him needing a hard one for his back 😭 so what they would do is stick two beds right next to one another to create a king sized one

jfk was such a sweet tooth tbh it could only be rivaled by his own daughter (whom he had such a close and tender relationship with of course but thats for another post ..) but to be frank he kind of needed to be one! His blood pressure and sugar were low more often than not .. a result of his addisons disease im p sure

Tied to the one above unfortunately his constantly low bp made him a susceptible target of fainting and blacking out more than the average person. To his luck if he overworked himself even a little he would collapse .. he was literally like a porcelain doll in a way he was so frail in terms of health

he (and his brother bobby) both had a terrible issue with dissociation. They couldnt help but zone out and completely derealize during social events or conversations and there are a couple of videos you can find online with him doing this

he fidgeted SO. MUCH. Like im autistic and neurodivergent and yet i dont do it as much as he did fuck did he have 😭 many say that his fidgeting was 1) subconscious and 2) to help ease his pain. We know the latter was how he dealt w his back pain ,he used to use his rocking chair as a type of fidget to keep his mind numb .. for one he had a terrible habit of tapping his teeth with his fingernails and it took him jackie to.. not like teach him out of it but get him to sort of stop in a way i guess

21. he was friends with frank sinatra ! Obviously during his presidency they grew out but if one ever needed anything from the other like theyd provide it for them

22. jfk loved animals but unfortunately had the worst allergies known to man 😭 theres one instance where he tried to impress jackie by riding a horse i think when they were still in their early years of marriage? or before that even im not sure .. but not even half an hour or so later he was sneezing all over the place and out of breath like he was gonna die or something

23. kennedy was quite an avid reader. He loved to read in his free time and whenever he was sick . He mainly did this during childhood and teenagehood where sickness took up more than half of his life at that point ,and with no one to company him during the hours sitting on a bed (i mean not even his own mother .. barely writing to him a letter or two if she even replied to his) (except for lem whom wrote to him almost daily im pretty sure? Im not sure if he used to visit or not but considering he was sick he probably couldn't) he found himself reading books and classic literature to ease the hours that passed alone

24. his relationship with his mom was so bad like genuinely it deserves a post of its own. theres one instance in the 50s i think talking with his friends he allegedly said 'my mother never held or hugged me! never! never!' and im sure it kickstarted his aversion to touch somehow 😭

25. jfk loved getting his hair played with. So did bobby i think but im not sure 😭 i think we all do honestly but for him it was all the more relaxing for it being a foreign thing to him .. some of our best memories as children were when our parents used to play and run their fingers through our heads and we knew how relaxing it was! But he never got that as a kid i dont think 😕

26. kennedy was the one who taught caroline (and jr im pretty sure) how to swim! In a passing down of his love for the ocean and sea to his children he taught them both from an early age swimming ,so in a way they could join him during his swims if they wanted to

^ helping him swim i think here

im tired of thinking of more so thats it! and feel free to add some other facts or anecdotes in the rbs or replies id love to read them

[n0phalt]

people found this which is kind of funny but also kind of keeps reminding me that the thing Happened even though my brain has since blocked it out so. mixed bag

i love the grind i love experiencing something devastatingly life altering and getting home just in time to scarf down One meal for the day and sleep immediately so i can get up in time to do the last few days of job that makes me frustrated and guilty inherently. guy in corner meme ‘they dont know i witnessed the horrors yesterday’ with name tag that says ‘im sooooooo normal’

[akashirl]

Miguel!!! I wanted to ask you what your opinions are on the headcanon/idea that bc of his DID, Sei suffers from memory gaps depending on who's around and amnesia sometimes? im curious how u and ur ship interprets him in the sense of his plurality :3

hello! first of all, thank you so much for asking! it warms my heart that some people are curious about my relationship with sei, be it because of his aspects or mine. that being said, i'll try to make myself clear!

let's start off with his switches. he's able to mask it pretty well when a switch occurs, but he can feel himself getting dizzy when letting a side of his taking over. that applies to both oresei and bokusei (they both feel dizzy seconds after a switch, as they're trying to adapt to their surroundings outside of headspace and need a few minutes to locate themselves. they're pros at acting natural though.). since oresei is the "core" (gosh, i detest this term), he gets to spend most time with me and he is fronting around 60% of the time, so it's quite an amount. bokusei is still trying to acknowledge himself as more than just a protector to the body, but it's quite difficult for him at times so he stays in the shadows. he wants oresei to be happy with his friends, even if that means that he will have to stay watching him from innerworld.

when bokusei does come out, it's usually to help with oresei's exhaustion or when he feels a slightly bit endangered or intimidated. i've been trying to get boku to come out more often without those particular reasons, since i'm in love with him and miss him a lot. ore encourages bokusei to front as well, but it's not always that easy. he doesn't value himself enough. still, the balance is not that bad.

when ore or boku are fronting, the other can watch, listen and even speak to the one fronting. it's called "inner communication" and it works just as described. they often play games inside his head, and you'll see sei sitting in a dark room "talking to himself".

there are small amnesia gaps between the two. like, at times oresei would front and find his homework already completed, without the memory of having even started it -- of course this is due to boku doing them prior to the switch. sometimes, when boku is fronting and has to do something, i promptly tell him "your brother has already done that" and he feels a bit out of place. my sweet boy, i really wish he saw himself as anything other than just a tool. but that takes time, and we're getting there.

what does happen at times is when i'm playing basketball with ore and we're almost done with the game, boku fronts and demands i play with him as well, unaware of how his stamina is wearing off and how tired we both look. then he notices that and gets a bit gloomy that he hasn't had the proper time to spend with me or with the others playing ball, like he loves to do.

they're similar to eachother, but are still two different people. that means we have different dynamics and there are some things that boku likes to do that oresei doesn't and vice versa and i'm very mindful of them. that includes taste (you better pray that one of them doesn't front while eating something they dislike) but strangely, i pulled both of them. i'm literally a mary sue. nerf me.

when we leave notes to eachother, boku and ore always sign below so i know who's speaking to me. (and they have different handwritings.)

one thing that happened once was when we were sleeping (in the same dorm room), ore fronted during the night and came to hug me because he hadn't been with me the entire day.

it's (love)² and i wouldn't want it any other way...

[joysmercer]

okay I’m so curious about the short fic you posted yesterday

can I ask how in this universe nina dies? And does eddie too?

(it’s mask of anubis on main btw)

ooh fun questions!! i was hoping someone would ask cuz i couldn't figure out how to work it in. also i added way too much info that you didnt ask for so now it's under the cut :D

first of all, this au is a much darker take on how i think nina's life "actually" played out – I think she'll always have random spirits coming up to her etc, but in this au, it's pretty constant and can get very dangerous very quickly. on the flip side, she sees a lot more fame for her "irl" work than she does "in canon" (see below).

somewhat ironically (given how guarded nina becomes from the constant barrage of gods forcing her to do things), she makes her living off of writing movies about her experiences. i think she does this in canon too, but here she really throws herself into it, almost like a form of therapy since there isn't really any professional she can process things with, you know? she eats, sleeps, breathes her craft – whenever she has downtime, she's writing, editing, networking to get her words out there. she's so fast and so talented with it that she graduates university in three years with honors, by which time the chosen one (season 1) has already been picked up by a major company and has started filming; she wins her first oscar two years later, and the next two each year after that.

(actually, all four scripts got picked up at the same time, which is why the turnaround was so quick – but they didn't announce the sequels until after the oscars because at that point she was a relatively unknown person)

(also i know this isn't how these things work irl but just work with me here. maybe she called in a favor from a random god and had things sped along idk)

anyway, the point im trying to make is that she spends her whole life balancing what she wants to do (her work) with what she has to do (paragon shit) and has a weird sense of self-worth as a result (she knows she's good at what she does, but wants to hide it from the world at the same time (out of fear). she hates that she needs others to keep her safe and refuses to believe they're doing it out of kindness, even though she also knows that they genuinely love her. it's weird) (also she and fabian make up sometime during their uni years so all is good there)

anyway, they (amber + KT) set up a rota of all ex-sibuna members (+ willow as she learns about it pretty quickly post-grad) to spend time in the states for a couple months out of the year each. this essentially made sure there was always 1 other person on the mission with her and 2 people nearby who knew where they were going, should things go wrong and they need rescuing or something. but for small/random tasks, nina would just do those alone.

her last mission (that fabian alludes to) had taken months to complete: three formerly-benign ghosts had been "turned" by a magician up in canada, released from the underworld, and, driven mad by the magic (and confusion of being back in the real world), had started a series of freak thunderstorms across the american midwest. together with jerome, she had to figure out how they got released, stop the magician, construct the device necessary to trap the spirits and send them back, and use said device to stop the storms. the effort had completely exhausted her (so much so that she – making headlines – decided to take a step back on touchstone production, instead of hanging out on set like she did for the other three)

(that's why tor is the way it is. with her dropping off of the face of the earth, someone decided – while she couldn't argue against it – to absolutely slash the budget, which lead to a mess of a story (screenplay is the only oscar it wins)

nina's death (as alluded to in the article) really seemed out-of-the-blue. basically, she was on a mission – alone – that suddenly and very unexpectedly turned dangerous. but when she was found (by KT and amber together) it looked like she just collapsed at home – there was no indication of any foul play or anything, really, of how she died.

also alluded to in the article, but a lot (but not all) of KT's "investigative journaling" was her covering up the consequences of nina's missions with theories that would make sense to the general public. nina's last request of her was to halt any investigation into her death prematurely as she knew things would unravel pretty quickly otherwise

joy's role in nina's life was mainly to book her for enough public-facing events/etc so that people wouldn't question where she was when she "disappeared" for a month or two, as well as act as her social media manager/"source close to her" to tabloids during extended absences so people continue to think she's okay. this was especially important given nina's monumental rise to fame (and as a screenplay writer, at that! usually it's the actors/directors who get most of it!) and her relatively young age, which meant she got herself a fandom very quickly…and we all know what the rumor-spreading capabilities of stan twitter are like. there were quite a few times nina came back from a mission to find several "new" pics on her instagram or that shes going viral for something she doesn't "remember" saying lskdjf

amber's role was to media-train the hell out of nina so she never gives any indication that a) there's an element of truth in her work; b) she lives a double life; and c) weird things keep happening in the cities she happens to frequent (eg random buildings falling, artifacts disappearing, etc). we all know this girl can't lie to save her life…amber is nothing but a miracle-worker in that regard lol

as for eddie – his death is basically the reason things are so awful, now. he actually dies at the end of tor, and not only does osiris himself blame nina for it (using "logic" that can rival senkhara's in s2), but it also leaves nina terrified since she no longer has a protector – something all the other gods/spirits quickly take advantage of (threats/blackmail/etc) for the first few years, by which time word of her willingness to do anything spreads and she can't get rid of the constant requests. it doesn't help that his death also proved to them that nina (like her counterpart) can, and will, sacrifice herself to save the world, if it came down to it, making her the perfect pawn in a lot of schemes.

[percynorthwest]

@jegulus-microfic

Jegulus Microfic

june 23 - Brain

1300 words

TW: OCD, compulsions, and some ERP-therapy

(Reg is struggling with his ocd, trying to do ‘therapy homework’ and James supports him best he can)

(a/n at the end)

"You don't understand! There is something wrong with my brain!" Regulus says, voice filled with anger, no -desperation, in such a way that makes James shiver. "I have to. I have to, I have to, i have to I have to I have to." each time he repeats himself, the previous agitation lessens, and what's left is sobs, getting more quiet each time.

James doesn't know what to do. He wants to help Regulus as best as he can, but he also knows that he shouldn't reassure too much, that that would only hurt in the long term.

"It doesn't work, why can't it just be like i want it to?!"

He mumbles with the panic still stuck in his throat. Tears are running down his cheeks, but he doesn't pause the task at hand for even a moment to wipe them away- something he would otherwise usually do as soon as possible (he hates the feeling of them on his face, james knows.) James, still feeling helpless, takes a tissue, softly ask if it's okay for him to wipe them away, to which Regulus nods and lets out a slight hulk.

Carefully, James brings the tissue to regulus face, and softly wipes away the tears.

"Help,"

James could barely hear the word uttered from Regulus' mouth.

"How can I help my love?" He asks.

"I don't know," Regulus answers, once again starting to hulk more violently, breathing faster. "it's just wrong, everything ís wrong, i get it wrong. i can't stop."

james takes a sharp breath, trying to find something that would be able to help, but not only in short -time. He has researched the disorder ever since Regulus told him about it. Obsessive compulsive disorder. Reassuring will only lessen the worry of the moment, it won't actually help. Trying to argue with logic on why to stop, wouldn't help. Saying "It looks fine, just stop." or "They're clean, you can stop washing your hands" certainly wouldn't help. Not that those examples were any contenders to James on what to do.

"I know that there's no logic in it, at least no concrete logic. But in my head it makes perfect sense, and i just have to. everything will be okay if i just do it. But each time i follow through with a compulsion, it makes them harder to ignore in the future. It only lessens the anxiety of the now, but in a way i only postpone the anxiety until i'm not able to follow through with it. And all of a sudden what i only did once or twice a day, becomes the most time-consuming thing in my life. And just like that im stuck, and just the thought of stopping - of not doing it- feels impossible. I just have to"

Regulus has said that when trying to explain his disorder to James.

"Should we put on a timer?" James asks.

Regulus nods.

"How long?"

Regulus thought about it for a moment.

"Two minutes." he finally landed on.

the hulking calms down, and Regulus seems to be able to breathe more slowly.

He was folding clothes, something he hadn't done in a long time due to his ocd. It wouldn't be 'just right' and he would have to do it over and over again. Finally he stopped folding his clothes all together, he just threw the clothes straight from the dryer into the closet. There was some kind of irony in that, something regulus had previously pointed out, that because he couldn't fold his clothes 'perfectly' he would just throw them in the closet instead. His clothes were always wrinkly.

A lot of people assumed that just because he had OCD, he would constantly clean, and be super organized, but he wasn't. Maybe it was like that for some people, but not for him -and probably not for most. And it certainly isn't some sort of superpower, it's exhausting and extremely time consuming.

Starting to fold his clothes again is part of his therapy, ERP-therapy, exposure response prevention. He is supposed to do the tasks, without compulsions, or with the least amount of compulsions possible. It's difficult, extremely anxiety inducing and nerve-wrecking.

"Do you want me to stay by you, or leave you alone?" James asked, completely without judgement, knowing that Regulus was slightly ashamed of his compulsions, and rather wouldn't let people see.

"You can leave." Regulus says, "And I'll come out when the timer runs out."

James nods, even though Regulus was too focused on the clothes in front of him to even see. he was smoothing out wrinkles meticulously.

Just when James stepped out of the room, he could hear Regulus calling out for him.

"Yeah?" he says as he turns around in the doorframe.

Regulus don't look back when he continues.

"Will you be mad at me if I can't do it?" He asks, back still turned towards James, and hands occupied with the clothes.

it was said so softly and in such a vulnerable voice, that james felt his heart break a little.

"No, i will never be mad at you for this." he says softly. "But you're not doing it for me, you're doing it for yourself, and to get better, so it's not about pleasing me, it's about trying to resist the intrusive thoughts."

James knew that Regulus already knew all that, and maybe this one of the times where he wasn't supposed to reassure Regulus, he wasn't sure, but he also didn't want Regulus to do this for anyone other than himself - that wouldn't be helpful for him in the long run either.

Regulus nods, and james leaves and takes a seat in the sofa, trying not to worry too much, and concentrate on his phone instead. He wasn't able to, but he scrolled down the endless feed nonetheless.

When the alarm rings in the room next by, it rings for a while before it stopped. And Regulus doesn't come out.

James stays on the couch. They had discussed everything somewhat beforehand, and james isn't supposed to interfere if Regulus doesn't ask for help.

If he hadn't research before, he knows that he would have been constantly enabling Regulus. He would always try to reassure him and help, and do whatever would make regulus feel better at that time. -and that wouldn't have helped Regulus at resisting the compulsions.

It's still hard not to, because all he wants to do is help Regulus when he's struggling. Make him feel better, make his anxieties go away.

after another minute or two, the alarm rings again. James stares at his phone, not even looking at what's on the screen, just waiting.

And then Regulus steps out of the room, and James feels a wave of pride wash over him. Because Regulus did it. He managed to resist, and put the clothes in the closet even though he really wanted to redo it.

Regulus is still looking quite tense, but he immediately meets James in a hug, and james feels good about being able to finally comfort Regulus.

"Do you wanna go on a walk?" James asks, knowing that Regulus is probably feeling quite uneasy, anxious, and might be needing some distractions.

And so they go on a walk. It's a short one, just around their neighbourhood. It's a path they will come to walk often, because it becomes sort of a routine to go on a walk after Regulus does his 'therapy homework'.

Each time resisting becomes a little bit easier; folding the laundry -or whatever other task that he's obsessing over- and each time it gets a bit quicker, and is a bit less anxiety-inducing. However it's not a straight line to recovery. Sometimes there's a step in the wrong direction, or it's at a long stand-still, but in the end he makes it through. It's not easy though. it's difficult, mentally demanding, and draining, but in the end so worth it.

There comes a time when he's able to do everything on the first try. The thoughts are still there, they just show up less often, and they are less intrusive.

AN:

this is largely based on my own experience with OCD, along with what I've learned by a psychiatrist. My experience of course doesn't reflect how it is for everyone - it's more or less completely individual, as well as what helps, if you or someone you know is struggling, seek professional help!

here's some resources: https://iocdf.org/

[aannonn]

★ ─。colorful text , strong colors , bold text , brief mention of suicide , implied/referenced grief , swearing

okay i know we are all excited about the actual short that just came out but let me ramble a bit about Red cause im getting emotional about this stick ... ( before my motivation to type all of this ends and i dont feel emotional anymore lol )

Red in season 3 went through so much istg ;; not only did he and Sec went through a very tense (and needed) fight which almost caused the end of their friendship (+ Sec was clearly in the winning side here, or Red was just really terrified of her at that moment given to how he tried to run away from her - of which i will probably talk about it in a later post maybe), but he was also really fucking tormented in monster school (i felt so bad for him in this episode i legit wanted to cry)

+ after all of this fiasco he really went ahead and carried this thing (of which, given to how he hit it on the ground and it made a soft thump, it must have been heavy asf) all the way to the other side and??? fucking smashed King's chin which made him fly to so fucking far ;; which means he literally used all of his strenght to carry this staff, and dropkick King with it, even if it was so hard he almost even dropped it at first

AND THEN HE JUST. PROCEEDS TO PASS OUT ON THE FLOOR CAUSE HES SO FRICKING TIRED AND EXHAUSTED AAWRGHWS

there are also other moments where i think he really deserves a break tbh ;;

he lost a pet. i have a pet myself and just the thought of ever losing him hurts so fucking much to the point i can feel my oof'ing urges coming back.

;; granted; it was a minecraft pig and it was high with all the potions, and also tried to kill all of them, but he clearly atleast had some care for that pig ... (the fact that he immediately stood up and spawned another animal makes me think about that one post/tiktok (i dont remember the user) i've seen ; which talked about Red possibly hiding/bottling up his sadness from others , in order to stay happy and positive or because he doesn't think his struggles are important enough compared to the others' - which i think it make alot of sense since you rarely see him cry or something, just going numb and/or looking down in despair - the only ever time we ever saw him cry was when Green supposedly died.)

i haven't talked about this actual short before since i had no desire to , but damn bro the way i felt bad for Red in this(っ °Д °;)っ he just wanted to have red stuff for him aswell, since apparently it wasn't dropping for him for some reason???? okay he should have included green and blue stuff aswell instead of possibly removing them but. still. Green and Blue were so fricking wrong in this

and !! his and Sec's tense relationship in the past seasons ... i love Sec he's literally my fav out of them all but i cannot defend xem on this. i know she had her reasons and im not saying Red was in the right either but, gosh ... pretty ironic given he's the one who inspired xem to break in in their site and join them in their battle

... i dont even need to explain do i

he lost a pet ... again. and because of his own fault aswell ! he knew the possible dangers of fusing the command block and the staff together , given how he almost got possessed alongside his friends the first time something like this happened , and yet ... he did it anyway . and beeper died as a consequence . i cant imagine how much guilt he must have felt .. (probably one of the main reasons why he didnt put up a fight when they put him in the timeout box)

i think he wanted to cry at this scene ngl ,,,

thinking about this ; they are all really tragic characters tbh ,,, stepping away from the heavy angsty all of c!Alan's stickfigures go through , rygb goes through a lot of shit aswell , and tbh i just feel bad for all of them ; they are all such tragic characters that deserve a very well-needed break break/_ \

since we are in this topic aswell , i would like to mention how i really love Blue and his immediate rush in being a comfort for the others<3

i used to think Yellow was the therapist friend but we only ever saw him comfort Blue lolll ( i love him anyway ;; i think Blue is more of a therapist friend than he is though )

[uncreative-cryptid]

Still in the car :’)

So all I’ve had time for is to think about how Valerian and Caladin would probably have very in depth conversations on how to avoid Overclocking (and avoiding medical personnel in Cal’s case)

I think it’d be a really rough conversation for both of them. Mainly because I don’t think Cal comes anywhere close to Valerian’s instability- or even Camellya or Calcharo. He has varied stability (as stated in his Forte Examination)

But he’s been around a while, and his own grounding techniques are still pretty different from the typically prescribed therapy.

I’m just so curious as to how that conversation would go :3

i am so glad to touch on the topic of valerian's overclocking cause he genuinely HATES when he is getting close to overclocking (for a myriad of reasons i will detail)

first of all based off the information we get from resonators like camellya (and others who are highly unstable, like calcharo and sanhua), overclocking has some SERIOUS physical affects that seem to range from exhaustion to outright physical changes.

if the topic gets brought up, it'd likely be post-mission or post-battle, winding down. either caladin or valerian talking about the battle (probably valerian honestly) as they're trying to unwind a little.

valerian would be idling with his bracers and the sleeves, where it's probably that caladin would realize how much valerian's forte affects him physically.

valerian mutters something about the pressure, and when the fabric rolls down, shards are probably falling down and out of these sleeves as he shakes them off and removes the shards like he's done a thousand times before.

if questioned, he probably kind of laughs it off, forgetting that not everyone has really seen how .. close he gets to overclocking and how constant it actually really is for valerian when he's fighting closely with people he cares about.

valerian will, sheepishly, admit he was pretty damn close to overclocking and playfully wave it off, probably joking about how "careless" caladin was and he just wanted to make sure caladin wasn't hurt (he's actually extremely terrified of hurting another resonator and friend, so battle with people he's familiar with put him under a lot of emotional strain he isn't showing, adding to that instability).

however he will absolutely jump at the chance to show caladin his own techniques to how he handles his own stress.

something i've briefly detailed was that valerian keeps a chain of stones that are wrapped in wires and trinkets, and in his previous cherished items he has a "worry stone" he uses pretty often when he can.

pre-battle: valerian will often silently take stock of his own crystals he's carrying on hand and minerals he has tied to his hip. it's a grounding technique that reminds him of the immediate space around him and the vibrations he's specifically chosen to carry with him in order to further himself (he will not actually say this exactly, but he might throw it out like "oh, i like to tell myself which rocks im carrying. did you know this one has a measured vibration of [x] ? pretty neat" because valerian himself cannot admit he's a little superstitious or at the least feels a connection and draw to the metaphysical side of these things)

during battle: valerian is probably extremely focused on the fight, but something i don't think i've ever really expanded on too deeply is that some crystals actually have associations with specific numbers (think like lucky numbers kind of things) - so all of his damage and all the numbers in his kit are actually related to the associated numbers aura quartz has. however, for valerian, his repetitive pattern is actually in measures of four ... like a standard sheet music with a 4/4 count/a metronome ticking in 4/4. (i briefly recall you said in a moot's post you played instruments, so hopefully that kinda makes some lick of sense lmao)

post battle: he has a little routine he usually follows, which includes removing the shards from the covered fabric if he did overclock/was very close to overclocking, and probably taking some time to look at the thinner crystals he is carrying through the light because he likes the way the like bounces off and around the insides of these crystals. not only is it relaxing to him, but it's a great way for him to keep himself from getting worked up again after a battle if he was a little too close to overclocking that particular day.

sorry caladin, you will probably get rock-based info dump because valerian wont just admit that He Cares About You TM but he has The Trauma

[arminsbf]

im rlly loving armin today…..tell me somethings about him….

HI DAHLIA!!!! me too omg literally every day 💗💗💗

i don’t know if this makes any sense at all because i’m just yapping but here you go!!!

before you dated it was SO fucking obvious that you liked each other — it became a running joke in the friend group about how he was so clearly in love with you

and yet I think it would take a long time before you two actually got together!! you had to be the one to admit your feelings — because ever since he realized how he felt, he stood by NEVER telling you abt it js because he was so scared you would reject him

but… srsly… he loves you so much. he’s so much happier now that he has you and that he doesn’t have to hide it anymore!!

mf sleeps SO MUCH, especially in the summer because he’ll be out in the sun all day and come home exhausted

he loves to watch movies with you but trust half of time he will js pass out while cuddling w you!!

basically whenever he’s touching you he gets tired :( you’re js so warm n comfy… he just… 😴😴😴

but that shows how much he trusts you!!!!! you’re really one of the only people he can be vulnerable around — even w how close he is to eren and mikasa

if you have long hair, he’ll learn how to do a ponytail, and then a braid… with help from you and from youtube 😭 he thinks it looks cute on you n he likes that he did it himself :3

maybe he’ll learn a french braid if u like when he does it enough!

loves spending time with you even if you’re doing literally nothing. he enjoys js being in the same room as you even if you’re doing something else

STUDYING!!!! you know he is such a nerd… he really does spend a lot of his free time studying/doing his work. his favorite thing though is working while you’re in the room!! like I said he really js likes being around you… you don’t have to be interacting.

he just likes having you there, even if you’re just on your phone or smth! he likes hearing your breathing, and having something to look at. he feels like a weirdo because it’s not much different from being by himself — but he loves you so much and js wants to spend as much time with you as he can!!

I KNOW YOU SAID THIS BEFORE BUT HE LOVES FRUIT???? he is always eating fruit. if you like fruit too he will make you this https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLyJ1d5B/ and eat it with you

i mentioned this once but i’m so serious he ran track in high school. he ran the 400 and HATED it but all his friends did sports and he was like okay i guess i can do this…

absolute demon at beach volleyball

always hounds you abt sunscreen because he spends so much time at the beach. “no babe you’re gonna get skin cancer you need to put it on!!!!”

but he offers to do it for you so it’s not so bad :3

he is allergic to shellfish

another thing i’ve mentioned before is that I think he gets nightmares sometimes :( he might wake you up from squirming or making noise, but then you can be there for him!

he’s usually okay right after, it’s never anything too bad — mostly just falling dreams, or maybe being chased. still leaves him feeling anxious and overwhelmed, so he’ll hold you close. with you there to calm him down he can fall back asleep peacefully

hmm i think he likes to hold your hand n kiss your forehead n your nose during sex :3

he’s super clingy w you in private but he gets so embarrassed talking about it with his friends…

like of course he’s not embarrassed to talk about you and how amazing you are but he struggles to talk about how much YOU love HIM without wanting to run and hide

cook him anything and he’s instantly proposing. he loves eating food you make even if it’s not good!!!

ice cream dates!!! he likes ice cream anddd I think his favorite flavor is mint chocolate chip

there,,, a lot of random thoughts abt my bf armin i hope you enjoyed!! 💗💗💗💗

[solar-wing]

Im sorry, but HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO WRITE SO MANY GOOD FICS WITH THAT MANY WORDS??????

Do you have any tips for anyone planning to start writing? Can you describe how your creative thinking works? Love your work!

my exact writing process:

going from left to right:

– stare at my computer, willing the idea/scene in my head to appear on the document in words while listening to whatever inspired me on repeat. – sleep after exhausting my creative energy in such a strenuous manner. – eventually, come back to the idea/story only to end up formating the story post (story cover, author's note, summary, masterlists links, etc.) and not actually work on the story itself. – EVENTUALLY, write something and feel proud of myself for all of five minutes.

– eventually, come back and cringe at the screen wondering what the fuck I wrote and how I even got to the point I'm at. – question who I am and what I'm doing while staring at the screen, attempting again to will the scene/story I'm imagining onto the screen in a DECENT format while also wondering how the fuck it got so long. – read a notification from one of you coronal mass ejections asking me when the story I've been ignoring for months is getting updated (rightfully so) – write with passion fear, because I know if I delay any longer, one of you CMEs will eventually unite the rest of you and start a mass riot.

– stare at the post after publishing it and refresh my screen every thirty seconds to see the likes, reblogs, and comments coming in. – sleep (very important step) – eventually, read over my own work after posting it, going back in to make edits after realizing I either have a duplicated paragraph/section or a misspelled word somewhere and it's bugging the hell out of me while trying to just ignore it. – look at my inbox/drafts, trying to decide what request/draft I should finally start/finish, until I don't do that and just end up starting a new random story after getting inspired from the most random thing.

and that's it (i'm so serious, it goes exactly like that)!

but, in more seriousness, there's three crucial things to my writing creative/process.

an idea that was randomly sparked from a song or likely another post I read somewhere.

a super-powered hyperfocused spawned from ADD (attention deficit disorder) that randomly turns on and off.

drafts that have been sitting in my Google Drive for months to nearly a year.

it's funny because I'm sure people have questions of how I'm pushing upwards of 30K word fics out back to back at times, and the whole time, I'm like "This draft has been sitting here and getting slowly added to since April."

One Kent Was Enough was an idea I got last year during the summer (2023), and the draft had literally been sitting in my Google Drive and Tumblr drafts for months. Like I'm pretty sure I had a draft post of it on my old account before it got shadowbanned and I made this one..

All that to say, my writing process is pretty organic to me. It's really a reflection of my personality and how I operate in real life. Though, I I'd doubt that a lot of the stuff I put in there is unique just to me.

As far as tips I would have, the first one would be don't expect to write like your favorite author off the bat. One, you're two completely different people with different personalities, styles, likes/dislikes, etc. Two, if any of you remember how Nightwing and Shadow first came about, then you know seeing where it's gotten now has been a process. I promise I did not just start writing like this.

But, the biggest tip I would give is to just write. I saw a music artist named Doechii say this in an interview: "I have the right to be bad at something when I first start." Like I said in my process, there are many points I will look back at my work and completely hate it. Sometimes, the stories won't make sense to you or you'll feel like you've just thrown a bunch a words on the screen. It's okay.

It adds to your process because eventually, you start to learn what works best for you and what doesn't. Also, the stories end up turning out to be really well-thought-out and good in the end. I'm not joking when I say One Kent Was Enough was a literal mess at multiple points, and many times, I had no idea where I was going with the story. I literally couldn't get past the scene where the boys meet their dads and the rest of the Team for months until I had a breakthrough.

you'll eventually find your own way. just start writing 💛